Author's Note

Any speech not labeled is the P.O.V Charters.

Please give suggestions for theme appropriate music, Thank You.

Chapter 1 A Wild Wasteland

Chapter 1, Wild Wasteland

POV James Whitman

I woke up with a slamming headache. The moon blazing high above the tree line. Attempting to stand left my legs like rubber and tasting purple with my ears. Looking around I found my bike stood up against a massive oak tree. Wait a oak tree, in the middle of the Mojave. Removing my helmet I took a deep breath and kept looking around. FIrst thing I saw was a massive rut in the ground leading up to a man in T-60 power armour, and another man in a filthy like green coat. "Well the good news is that I'm not here alone." Bringing up my pitboy 3000 I checked my rads. I was pretty fucked up. And after three Rad Aways I felt like a new man again. I yelled "Hey shit heads you know why were here? Or what were supposed to do and why?" I picked up a rock and threw it at the tin can. "Wake the Fuck up shit heads. And tell me where the fuck we are."

The big lump of metal gets up and also takes a shit load of Radaway. "Dude shut your cunt whore of a mouth. I got a splitting headache. ~Dustin" Lifting his helmet half way up his face. He then pulled a bottle of whisky, a entire bottle from a brown canvas bag. Then he drank the entire bottle. Like no joke, and I'm pretty sure the smell woke up sleeping beauty. He started searching through his bag and pulled out a bag of Rad Away. Followed by a cigarette.

"Ahhh, man I fell great. This fresh air is doing me wonders. Haven't seen trees like this since before the bombs.~Thomas" Taking a long pull from his cigarette.

I was getting about fed up with my two substance abusive companions. "So do any of you know where we are. Because last thing I remember I was traveling the Mojave wastes and making a small fortune while doing so. And I would like to be getting back to that." "I mean the strip isn't going to run itself." Their lack of a reaction was more than a bit vexing. I mean I killed a lot of baddies to get my name recognition. I mean I the courier who won the battle for Hoover Dam. Sure the remnants and boomers helped but I was the main force.

Dustin got up, his hulking form towering over everyone else. "Look I don't know who the Fuck you guys are or why were we are. But it looks like we got stuck in this shit show together, so let's try to work things out.~Dustin" Swinging around his massive gun like a toy and resting it on his shoulder plate. " So who's, who and what's what?~Dustin" "Now my name is Dustin and I'd like to her your names please.~Dustin"

The Tom began to fidget. Standing up and digging his boot into the ground. "Well my name is Tom and uhh I guess it is good to be apart of the group.~Tom" Skillful adjusting the dials on his scope. "I guess it good to have some company.~Tom" Tom sitting down on the damp ground. Merging with the environment and becoming a shadow. Lurking and watching the other two.

I stood up and walked into the dim moon light. Allowing my night vision to adjust. "So for those of you who don't know who I am already. I'm the waste walking motherfucking Courier. So don't Fuck with me, and we'll get on just fine." I pulled out my compass and picked due South for an acceptable detection to go wondering off in. "Alright my band of makeshift marry men, I'm going South. Fallow me don't fallow me I don't give a shit." The two others seemed more or less ok with my sudden bid for leadership.

We are moving at a crawl. Between my bike and Dustin's Power Amour being stuck in the mud it was starting to look rather sad. For Tom's part in things he moved through the forest like the wind. Moving through thickets has if he wasn't there. Looking ahead for an exit. "Ok but guy let me get that for you and we might just get this show on the road.~Dustin" His arms swooping in has he lifted up the bike. So gently you'd though it would have been feather. And noticeably picked up the pace. "I'm sorry but we can't be waiting on you all day and my about sinking because of how slow you are with this thing."

"You know what I don't ask for any help and If I needed it if ask. I was just trying to keep pace with you."

Both Tom and Dustin in unison "Yeah sure"

I fixed my belt and turned on some music I had on my pip boy. Muttering "Fuck you guys."

Music

The thick tree and underbrush soon started to thin. Allowing enough light to pierce the thick canopy to be able to seen more than 20 yards. We entered a small clearing and saw a little cottage. It has a straw roof and looked about 5 million years old. A number of animals scampered around the hut. Illuminated by the moon. "I haven't seen animals like that sense before the war.~Tom" This caught both of our attentions. Did he know if we could eat it? What was it and is it better than gecko meat? I went to go catch on but Tom's hand stopped me. "Here let me catch this one, their loud and who ever owns this one won't be happy were taking it.~Tom" He moved has quite has the dead. And quickly dispatched of the bird. Retiring just has silently. "Look like we got chicken for dinner today boys, ooh yeah this is good eaten. Almost has much has potted meat." Ignoring the disturbing thought of something liking the taste of potted meat, but I doubt this was worse than what I had. So Fuck it why not, it isn't every evening that you wake up in a forest with three heavily armed men and steal some tasty food.

We retreated over a nearby hill to enjoy our ill gotten gains. Dustin took the prepared meat from Tom, had butchered the bird in seconds. He then rubbed them dow n with some sort of spices and put them on sticks. While the worked on that I set up a small fire to cook the meat. The smell alone put Tom's words to shame. I sat waiting on the coming feast,I never had this before but if it was has good has it smelled I could die happy after eating it. "Ok boy I'm gonna enjoy this if it is the last thing I do." The other two didn't seem in the mood to argue. Both also watch the food cook counting the seconds. "I'm I think it is done plenty for me. I'm digging in!" All three launched an all out assault on the food.

"Ok boy you've had chicken now how was it and be honest? ~Tom"shushing

"It was way better than sex, like so much better."

"It was good, but better than sex. I don't know about that, you probably been with cheap prostitutes. But I can't blame the ladies if the prefer chocolate to vanilla.~Dustin

"Yeah the Fuck YOU KNOW ABOUT IT. I bet the only pussy you seen was your mothers. Waste land fuck. "

Dustin was laughing his was off. Now that pissed me and Lucky off. So I put it up against his now armoured head. "Fuck me, when did you put that thing back on you big hunk of meat?"

"What you think I haven't pissed off anyone else enough for them to pull and gun on me.~Dustin"

Our friendly chat was interrupted my Tom shushing us and moving up the hill. Sliding down he kicked dirt into the fire putting it out. A faint woman's voice could be heard in the distance. "Shut the Fuck up you two and try to hide at least a little. Someone is looking for their chicken.~Tom" He hugged the slope of the hill, carefully hiding his silhouette. Taking a pair of binoculars and looking out at the cottage his sudden jerk gave away his shock. I moved up next to him to see what he was looking at and saw a yellow and pink horse. "What on God's green earth is that? And who the Fuck out matching yellow wings on it.~Tom" It Looked over at us before returning to what ever stupid shit animals do.

Trapped my out yet unseen pursuers and the bright over head moon I started to try and think a way out. We would probably be best served just making a run for it. I mea n there was no way we were seeking out of this. "Alright boy, it looks like we are huffing it out of this one. There is no way they won't notice a motorcycle and massive suit of power armour clanking down the hill." The sun was having to rise and our shadowy allies were on the run. "On 3 1, 2 3," we took off and amazingly ran right into a entire village.

Mint Green Pony "What are those? Are they monsters and why are they making so much noise? Some ponies might be trying to sleep."

"Guy what the fuck, did that just talk?"

"Uhh.... I think so they didn't use to do that did they? ~Tom"

"Nope this is all new to me. And look at its' eyes. Their massive and that fur. "

We did what any group of self respecting wastelanders would do. Started pointing guns at the growing crowds off mutated horses. Not that they cared, they just kept creeping in on us. That was until a war shattering scream rang out.