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                    Shining "New" Armor                    
                    -by Wayward Shadow-                    
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              Prologue: How to Become a Pony               
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Prologue: How to Become a Pony
(Hidden and Homemade Shooting Range, Rocky Mountains, Unspecified man’s POV)
I personally wished I could join the military. However, my body weight, appetite, and somewhat lazy (but still hard working) personality kept me from even joining. Needless to say, I was forced to work in a restaurant in Idaho as a dishwasher. With that, I had no alternative to using guns and explosives except in video games and a homemade shooting range that was built on land I carefully saved for.
After a long drive through some mountains, my car came to my land and shooting range. I unpacked my car and prepared some targets (milk jugs and fruits of various sizes) and my favorite rifle, a Mosin-Nagant M1891/30, for shooting. Despite being a Russian designed gun, this was my most reliable rifle, and I treated it as such. Any time I go hunting or need to deal with intruders on my gun range land, my three line rifle was what was used. I cared for it like a parent does with a child, but not overly so.
After setting up the targets and loading my rifle, I took my spot at the end of the range and took aim. Pulling the trigger, the gun exploded. I’m not saying that the gun fired as usual, I’m saying it legitimately exploded. The gun’s barrel and internal workings broke into smaller pieces, a good number of them peppered my chest and punctured my legs. As I started feeling lightheaded from the loss of blood, I felt something impact my chest and pierce through me. After a few seconds of realization, I fell onto my back, and lost consciousness.
(The void)
When I woke up, I saw nothing, but paradoxically, I could see what looked like stars or planets or something space related. I went to rub my eyes, but my hands went through my head. I looked at my hands and to my silent horror, I saw that I was transparent. Before I could actually freak out, I heard a voice.
“Young man, it is best if you didn’t panic. There is a child here and he needs to remain calm.” I heard. Looking around, I saw the Merchant, the guy in those MLP Displaced crossover stories I’ve read...and Yes, I’m a gun fanatic that also likes MLP.
“I never thought I would meet you in my life. I never go to conventions and even if I did, I wouldn’t really buy anything, except food.” I said with a slight bit of awe.
“A shame that. Now, I just happened to be nearby when I felt you getting killed in that gun accident. So, I brought your soul to the void, just as Faust here brought the soul of a recently deceased colt as well.” He said. I looked around and saw a white coated and red maned and tailed alicorn with a transparent colt version of Shining Armor next to her. Said colt was looking at himself like I was minutes before.
“I’m dead!” Shining exclaimed in shock. I could feel the same kind of shock in me as well. We both could only look at each other as we could only fake hyperventilate. A couple of minutes passed before I looked to the two otherworldly beings.
“So, what’s to happen?” I asked with a bit of fear. “Is this a brief afterlife choice thing?”
“That it is, young man.” The alicorn, Faust, answered. “You both have died and either died before your time or lived a rather unfulfilling life.”
“And while we can’t give you your lives back, we can offer you a second chance.” The Merchant added.
“What is the catch?” I asked, getting everyone in the area to raise an eyebrow. “When it comes to things like this, there’s always a catch.”
“The only catch that would happen would be that when your souls are transferred over to the other, your bodies will change to be half-way.” Faust said.
“Meaning that Shining’s body will change to Anthro Pony while my body will change to Pony Man?” I asked, getting a nod from both beings.’Not much of a choice for me. Either live as a freak of nature among ponies or just be dead.’ I debated with myself. ‘And Faust mentioned having lived an unfulfilling life, so being given a second chance to have a good and somewhat proper life in exchange for looking relatively weird is a fair deal.’ I thought. “Well, I’ll take a second chance. If I have to be different to have that chance, well, I’ll do it.”
“And what about you, young Shining Armor?” Faust asked the young colt soul.
“In all honesty, I’ll pass on that.” Shining said, surprising us all. “At least, for now. In all honesty, going into a body that has an unfulfilling life while my mind is only four years old, it’ll be difficult to pick up the pieces.”
“Very profound for a four year old.” I commented.
“That’s the mind that is only four years old.” Shining said. “The soul can be profound beyond the years of the body.”
“True enough.” I conceded. “So...when do I start my new life?”
“Now.” Faust said, lighting her horn and I end up falling asleep.
(Canterlot Hospital, Shining Armor [age 4] POV)
I could hear beeping as I was beginning to regain consciousness. I carefully opened my eyes and slowed tried adjusting to the bright lights that came from the ceiling. I sat up to examine my body and true to Faust’s words, I’m anthro. Unlike what I read in certain fanfictions though, my legs and feet are different from what I expected. I expected hooves with satyr-like legs, but what I saw and got were human like legs and my feet were like a combination of feet and hooves (basically, think a foot with a cloven hoof serving as two big toes). I barely had time to register that in mind when a pair of grey hooves took me into a hug.
“Oh, Shining sweetie!” I heard a mare say as I was hugged. The mare was grey with a purple and white mane and tail. I instantly recognised her as Twilight Velvet, the mother of Twilight Sparkle and Shining Armor...well, now me. “I was so worried that the magical backfire killed you, but you’re okay! It’s just you’ve now become something else!” She cried on my shoulder. I returned the hug, rubbing and scratching her back, calming her down almost instantly.
‘Holy Hay! This is actually happening!’ I thought as I calmed Mom down while trying to keep calm. ‘I’m guessing Shining...well me...must have gotten into an accident of some kind. I have a few memories from his...my...past, but not much. Maybe Mom can help fill in those blanks.’
“I’m sorry for scaring you Mom.” I told her, as both fake and real tears rolled down my face. “Now, I think the backfire or whatever made me forget some things.” I told her. She looked almost ready to cry again, but I calmed her down with another back rub. “We can just talk about it. Think of it as a chance to go over memories and laugh together, as mother and son.” I said, which got her to perk up again. Her and I talked for a few hours, during which, Night Light (Dad) showed up with a nurse and dinner was served to me right there in my room. And to be honest, the hay food tastes pretty good.
Author's Note
And here is the start of a FanFiction that I intend to try to keep alive.
And I will count this (somewhat) as a Displaced FanFiction, so when Shining gets older, he'll stumble on someone's Token and crossover happens.

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          Chapter 1: Adjustments and Discoveries           
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Chapter 1: Adjustments and Discoveries
(Sparkle Household, Shining...my POV)
“Welcome back home son.” Night Light...Dad...said as he unlocked the front door, allowing me to follow in behind him as Mom kept behind me to support me with her magic if I stumbled as I walked in my new, yet old, bipedal state. Now, compared to a regular pony, I’ve had to make a few alterations to my life. For one example, all ponies have a way to hide their gender parts. Me, however, true to my altered anthro form, my boy bits couldn’t be hidden like regular parts. So, shortly after leaving the hospital, we had to visit a boutique owned by Fancy Pants and get several pairs of capri pants fitted to my new form. Shoes and other articles of clothing would come later.
I looked around the house and I could see that my parents have wealth, but they didn’t flaunt it around. The neighborhood we lived in had a large number of giant mansions, while our house covered our basic needs and nothing more, nothing less.
“Dad, what do you do for work again?” I asked, not remembering what he did for work.
“Oh, I work as a Bio-Magical Scientist.” Dad said with a bit of a smile.
“Okay.” I acknowledged. “So what plants or animals are you working on researching or experimenting with?” I then asked, while taking a seat in the living room.
“Well, we’re doing some careful testing and experimenting on a blue plant that came from the Everfree, just south of Canterlot.” Dad said, pulling a picture of the plant from somewhere. I immediately recognize the plant as Poison Joke.
“Why do you need to be careful?” I asked.
“Well, the plant has some...admittedly hilarious reactions to various ponies.” Dad said with a slight chuckle. “One of my associates wasn’t in a magic-protection suit and was touching some and he ended up with an oversized schnoz. Took us forever to figure out how to reverse the effect.” He added, his eyes tearing up from trying to hold back his laughter.
“With an effect like that, the plant should be called Poison Joke.” I suggested.
“Poison Joke?” Dad asked before thinking. “You know, I like that. It just rolls off the tongue. I’ll bring it up to my associates and higher ups.” He then went to the kitchen and some pots clanging was heard.
“Well, dinner will probably take a little while. So re-explore the house and see your room.” Mom said as she followed Dad’s movement and went to the kitchen. So, I followed Mom’s instructions and began to explore. The house itself was on the small side of things. One floor, two bathrooms, 3 bedrooms (one as the master bedroom) and a storage cellar. Despite the low number of rooms, the floor space was fairly big (my bedroom alone felt twice the size of the hospital room I was in).
After my exploring, I entered the kitchen and looked at my parents as they cooked what looked like a type of stir fry, with hay replacing meat. Comparing my four year old, humanoid form to my parents, I’m just barely taller than Dad’s shoulders...withers? Anyway, I knew that my new form would result in me being taller than the average pony. Add my need for clothing and potentially bigger appetite to that, my life would become interesting fast.
I turned towards a door that led to the backyard. A quick asking of permission, and they allowed me outside. The first thing I noticed was the giant, circular scorch mark in the center of the yard, with a barely damaged book sitting next to the damage on the lawn. Picking up the book, I saw that the book was a book on basic magic written in children’s storybook format. Peering through my memories as best I could, it turns out that I was attempting to try a teleportation spell after seeing one of Mom and Dad’s friends teleport in and out of the house when something was going on.
From there, I found this book hoping to find something, but the book had only a brief mention of teleportation, probably as an example of how far a magic caster could get. The thought of trying to replicate what I saw my parents’ friends did then came to my mind and I had died in the attempt of replicating the spell...at least temporarily.
I looked over the book and then looked to a window looking into the kitchen. Mom was looking out into the backyard, as if worried I would try to teleport again. Smiling, I opened the book to the teleportation mention, showed the page to her, all while shaking my head. I then turned to a page that seemed to be instructions on telekinesis, showed it to her and nodded.
The page detailed how the telekinesis spell worked. It was a simple process of envisioning an invisible hand, claw, or aura pickin up or surrounding the targeted object(s) and things should work. I placed the book down on the ground and took a step back. My imagination was able to envision the hand easily and the book raised off of the ground and I floated it to my real hands. Turning to the window, I saw both Mom and Dad looking out the window in both awe and pride.
In an instant, the both of them teleported outside and glomped me in a big hug, babbling about my first successful spell. We then went inside and enjoyed the hay stir fry. Time went by and the food was gone and the sun had been lowered by Celestia. I then went to bed, which I realised is going to go through a lot, as I’ll probably going to be growing bigger than the average pony when I start growing up. Just before I fell into the sweet embrace of sleep, a thought came to my mind.
‘I think I’m addicted to hay food.’
Author's Note
Here's Chapter 1!
Something for future reference: Each chapter will be 1000 words or more...at least according to Google Docs.

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               Chapter 2: School and Friends               
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Chapter 2: School and Friends
(Canterlot Terrace District Elementary School, Shining Armor [age 5] POV)
The Education system in Equestria is weird, but it is rather innovative as well. Each section of school (elementary, middle, and high) are four grades each, and school goes from Pre-K to 10. Amazingly, Pre-K is optional, so some students only have three grades for elementary. Another thing to note about the Education system is the district system that is for the big cities. Using Canterlot as an example, the elementary districts are the Terrace, Center, and Gate districts. Each district may sound like they are separated based on upper, middle, and lower classes, but Celestia herself made sure that the districts have a healthy mix of all three classes. Now, as for why I brought all of that up, well...today, I start my second, very first day of school.
Now, I start Kindergarten, as my parents decided to hold me from Pre-K, and I can pretty much agree with their decision, and you’ll understand momentarily.
My family and I live in the Terrace district, and the school is on the way to where Dad works. So, I had the privilege of having Dad walking me to school. When the roughly 10 minute walk ended and we stood in front of the school, I was nervous out of my mind, attempting to adjust the shirt I’m wearing. Dad seemed to pick up on my nervousness and he gave me a hug and a reassuring grin. It calmed me down and I went inside the school, giving Dad a good-bye wave as I did so.
Upon entry, I saw a set of signs that lead to the school’s auditorium. The seats were divided into the four elementary grades, with Pre-K in the back (as their parents had to be there for the orientation speech). Taking my seat, I looked over the Kindergarten class and saw that most were unicorns, with a slight sprinkling of pegasi and earth ponies. One thing that stood out, however, was the minotaur, griffin, and bat pony that were sitting off on their own in separate corners of the Kindergarten seating.
Unfortunately, I had to put my curiosity on hold, as Principal Dusty Books got onto the auditorium stage. Dusty Books was a well aged, but somewhat still young looking stallion. Also, despite his age and name, he seemed rather spry for an older stallion.
“Good Morning Students!” He greeted all of us with enthusiasm. We all greeted him back with a mix of enthusiasm and boredom. “That seemed to lack some enthusiasm. Let’s try that again.” He said, before greeting us again and we all responded again with the same amount of enthusiasm, blowing his mane back in the process. “Nice to hear you students again after a good summer break. Now, as the Principal of the Terrace District, I welcome back old students and welcome new students into the school.” He said, looking around at the Pre-K and some of the Kindergarten students when mentioning the new students.
“Now, while we are greeting new students, it would be a crime to not mention our three foreign exchange students and a new unique student from here in Canterlot.” He said, getting the many foals in the room to gasp and start talking amongst each other until he calmly shushed them. “Our first foreign student is from the country of Minos, Titanium Build.” The minotaur calf stood up and waved nervously before sitting back down. “Next, from Griffonia, Gregory.” The griffin cub opened his wings for a little bit, allowing everyone to see him before settling back in his seat. “And finally, from the hidden city of Valley Star, Midnight Nebula.” The bat filly seemed to shrink into her seat, almost turning invisible, causing some of the kids to giggle a bit, but not in a mean way. “Now as for our unique student, please welcome Shining Armor.” I took that as my cue to stand and wave, feeling just as nervous as Titanium looked when he was introduced.
After that introduction, Dusty Books introduced the four teachers and their aides. We were instructed to get up and follow our teacher to our classroom when the relevant teacher was introduced. I ignored when the Pre-K teacher and aide was introduced, and when the Kindergarten teacher and aide, Pencil Guide (unicorn) and Soft Touch (pegasus), were introduced, I got up with the rest of my class and followed them to the Kindergarten room.
When we arrived at the room, we were given the opportunity to play a bit and interact with the other students for the start of the class. This gave me the time I needed to go to one of the three foreign students.
“Hello, I’m Shining Armor.” I introduced myself to Titanium Build. The minotaur was roughly just barely taller than I am and was a chocolate color with a lot of white splotches and spots all over his face, like freckles.
“Oh...umm, hi?” Titanium practically asked, while setting down the wooden blocks he was messing with.
“Hi, umm, I want to hang out with you and the other non-pony students.” I said proudly, putting my fists on my hips like a proud man would.
My declaration took Titanium by surprise. “Are you sure?” He asked carefully. “No other ponies didn’t want to be Titan’s friend.”
“I’m not other ponies.” I pointed out. “Don’t even look like them. And I want to be the first of many ponies to be your friend.” I extended a hand to him and he hesitantly took and shook it. As we shook, I pulled him onto his hooves and then gave him a bro-hug. He hugged back, with a stronger squeeze, but not painfully so. I then gestured to the griffin and bat-pony, who were in the same portion of the room, but separate from each other.
As we both walked to the duo, an orange pegasus with a blue mane and tail was also approaching the duo. All three of us arrived and we began to interact with each other.
“Hey there you guys.” I greeted the duo and the pegasus. “I’m Shining Armor, and this is Titan.”
The griffin, bat-pony, and pegasus took notice of Titan and I. “Umm...hi, I guess?” The griffin, Gregory, said nervously, while the bat-pony, Midnight, seemed to get flustered and hid behind a nearby bean bag.
The pegasus, on the other hand, seemed to get excited when he saw me. “Wow! What kind a pony are you?” He asked excitedly, flying up to me and began flying circles around me.
“I’m...an Anthro Pony,” I said nervously. “It’s basically a Pony of any tribe that has similar features of a minotaur.”
“How are you like this?” Titan asked, taking a seat on a bean bag as the other few students calmed down and sat on a few. “Was some of your family minotaurs?”
“No, it was a magical accident roughly a year ago.” I said. “I was too impatient and I hurt myself. When I woke up, I was like this.”
“A pony’s weakness is also his greatest strength.” Gregory said with a slight hint of smugness. The pegasus looked like he was going to berate him for the comment, but I covered his mouth.
“I can’t disagree with your comment.” I agreed with him, causing the pegasus to look at me in confusion. “We get too confident and what may have been our best trait can easily turn against us.”
“Mistress Luna of Old is a fair example of such.” Midnight said, getting brave enough to insert herself into the conversation. “As much as my kind reveres her, we know that she had and will have flaws. Most of our kind do what we can to emulate her, even at her most evil, so long as our actions don’t break laws or angers the Harmony of the Land.”
“Words to live by, my winged friend.” I said, gently patting her withers. “Speaking of winged friends, what’s your name, buddy.” I asked the pegasus.
“I’m Flash Sentry!” The pegasus said proudly, taking flight for a few seconds before setting down.
“Who’s up for block building?” Titan said, grabbing a few buckets of blocks that weren’t being used. We all cheered in the affirmative and began building a really tall and somewhat fancy block tower. Little did we know, a life-long friendship was being built as well.
Author's Note
Here's the second chapter. It takes a lot of thinking to get any of these chapters done and keep this story alive.

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                 Chapter 3: Life and Love                  
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Chapter 3: Life and Love
(Canterlot High, Shining [Age 15] POV)
Ten years of school and I’m already ready to just leave school, even though graduation is still a good half-year off. Now a lot happens in 10 years. First and most obvious, was the birth of my sister, Twilight Sparkle. Roughly about two years after my first day of Kindergarten, Mom gave birth to her. When she got to age 4, she witnessed the view of the Summer Sun Celebration that turned her into a heavy book worm. Roughly a year later, Mom and Dad signed her up for school at Princess Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns. When she was being tested (the test was a test of capabilities, not an entrance exam as she would tell you), I was busy with my classes of 7th grade. When I heard the two explosions of magic, I thought nothing of it and continued with my school work. When I got home, I discovered that my sister was (mostly) responsible for the second explosion, and along with her getting her cutie mark and being admitted as Celestia’s personal, I pretty much got a new younger brother, who will be educated alongside Twilight.
Moving past my sister’s accomplishments, I also got my cutie mark. When me and my four friends got to the 1st grade, some of the unicorn ponies in our class got bold and began bullying me and my friends. However, when a bunch of them started getting physical (kinda) and started beating Midnight, I got between them and activated a shield spell that held up until some of the barely aware adults intervened. During the melee assault on my shield, my cutie mark appeared on my hips and my shirt (I had my shirts at the time enchanted to detect that). Afterwards, when my parents found out, they took me to Donut Joe’s to celebrate, and I invited all of my friends to the party.
Now, coming to the now, I must say that my increased appetite and my addiction to hay foods had an interesting effect on my body. I ended up becoming rather fat. However, and oddly, I was part of an ROTC program and they required a certain amount of fitness for me to join the Equestrian Armed Forces (the auxiliaries, specifically). This resulted in me being rather muscular and strong, while supporting a “Beer Belly”.
Anyway, my “Beer Belly” prompted a lot of joke names between me and my friends and a number of attempted insulting names from the school bullies. Now, I never was insulted by their comments, but if they took a step too far, I would contain them in a shield spell for about five minutes. After about a year or two of this, the bullies backed down, mostly.
It wasn’t until 9th grade that I noticed an interesting pony who was bullied for her stereotypical girly personality. Now, in public, she seemed to ignore the teasing and bullying that came her way. However, whenever she feels that she’s alone, she cries, like, a lot (and yes I followed her to her locker when she was alone, that doesn’t make me a perverted stalker!).
It was during one of the times she was bullied that my heart broke for her, as a trio of unicorn mares made fun of her “overly girly” looks and messed up her mane and books. When the mares left, she started crying. I immediately kneeled down and hugged her, while using my magic to gather her books up and fix her mane.
“Why are you helping me?” She asked, clearly confused. “I’m a freak, just like those mares said I was. I’m...I’m…”
“You are a beautiful mare with feelings that shouldn’t be violated by the mean things those mares said and did.” I countered. “If anyone should be considered a freak, I should be.”
“What do you mean?” She asked, not having taken a clear look at me yet.
“First off, I’m an Anthro Pony, therefore making me the odd one out at almost any gathering.” I told her. This got her to clear her eyes of tears and look at me clearly, shock appearing on her face when she saw me. “Second off, I’m rather fat, despite my muscles and fair fitness.” I patted my ‘beer belly’ gut to point it out to her.
“I...well...thank you.” The mare said. “I needed to hear that.”
“By the way, I’m Shining Armor. What’s your name?” I said, giving her a smile.
“I’m Princess Mi Amore Cadenza, but you can call me Cadance.” She answered, giving me a hug.
(Canterlot Theatre, Shining [Age 20] POV)
A couple of years have passed since my first meeting with Cadance. I graduated just short of being made valedictorian or salutatorian; I became a Captain in the Auxiliaries, leading my own squad that is composed of my friends from Kindergarten (the foreign ones became Equestrian citizens); and I became a couple with my sweet Caddy (don’t judge the nickname, she calls me Belly Armor as an inside joke between us). She was also close to my younger sister, babysitting her and Spike (the young dragon brother of mine) to the point of being a sister they never had.
Currently, Caddy and I were walking home after watching a night showing of what seemed like a ponyfied version of “Beauty and the Beast”. The main difference between the movie from Earth and the version in Equestria is that “Beauty” was replaced with an Earth Pony of “great beauty”, and “Beast” was replaced with a draconequis.
“That was a brilliant movie.” I said while I held Cadance in my arms like a large doggo puppy.
“I can’t disagree with you.” She said as she cuddled up to my chest and belly. “The movie was well designed to portray not love at first sight, but more properly developed love between two individuals.”
“I was referring to the comedic parts, but that works too.” I added, causing us both to laugh. We then arrived at my parent’s house, where I set Cadance down and opened the door. As soon as the door was closed, I could hear Twilight racing down the stairs.
“Shiny! Cadance!” She called to us, jumping into my arms and hugging my head. She then jumped down and did the little ‘Sunshine, Sunshine’ dance with Cadance. When they finished with a round of giggles, Mom and Dad came out of the kitchen with some plates and food containers.
“How’d the movie go son?” Dad asked as he set up some of the plates and containers.
“It went well, Dad.” Was my answer. “If only someone would just hurry up and make something to allow movies to be watched at home, I’d then show you the movie without fear of it not being played for the next six or so months.”
“Calm down, Shining.” Mom said, placing other plates and containers on the table. “Your father has plenty of connections in the Magical Science communities, so he’ll probably pass the idea to someone and the wheels will get rolling.”
“So, aside from the movie and dinner with your parents, what were planning on for this evening?” Cadance asked. When she said that, I just sighed and discreetly signaled for Dad to find the ‘gift’ I had gotten for her. When he came back, I kneeled down, roughly to her level.
“Caddy, for the past five years, we’ve been very close friends. Heck, Boyfriend and Girlfriend are just too much of an understatement, we are practically joined at the hip...proverbially speaking Twily, it’s just an expression.” I said, giving a ‘context note’ to Twilight. “So, after much consideration, and a lot of careful begging on mine and Dad’s part, I have a question.” I held my hand open for Dad to place the ring box in my hand. I then opened it and presented it to Cadance. “Will you Marry Me?”
Cadance started crying in joy. “I will, Yes.” She said. “I also want to show you something that Twily and I have been working on as well. I think it’ll make our marriage work better than how things are right now.” She then turned to Twilight and gave her a wink. She nodded and teleported off. A few seconds later she reappeared with a necklace in her magical grip. Cadance’s magic took over and placed it on her neck, and it looked beautiful on her. She then tapped the necklace’s gem and she began to glow a yellow color.
The glow intensified in a non-painful way, and I saw her outline go from a quadrupedal and unclothed form to a bipedal and clothed form. The light died down and there stood my Caddy, but now in an anthro form. “I wanted you to not feel alone in your...form. I’m willing to sacrifice my own reputation and form to make you happy.”
I stood up and placed the ring on her finger. “You made me happy by just saying yes.” I told her, and then hugged and kissed her.
Author's Note
To get an idea on what Princess Cadance looks like in relation to Shining, this picture will give you the idea.
https://camo.fimfiction.net/zg9sm_mTrUQJEJlnutRg0EbjVQaoUAdSaue0RHgRiKs?url=https%3A%2F%2Fd.facdn.net%2Fart%2Fth0mas%2F1519081125%2F1519081125.th0mas_duragan.png
Artwork credited to th0mas on FurAffinity.
Here's a link to the picture if the image doesn't work: Cadance and Shining (https://d.facdn.net/art/th0mas/1519081125/1519081125.th0mas_duragan.png)

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              Chapter 4: Friendship is Magic               
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Chapter 4: Friendship is Magic
(CSGU Dorm towers, Shining [Age 24] POV)
To say my sister was currently pissed would be a MAJOR understatement...but first, let’s back up a few minutes so you can properly contextualize the situation. Now, I am aware that all of you may know what she would/could be pissed at/about, but hear me out.
Me, my Wife (Cadance), and Spike were heading to Twilight’s Dorm Tower when she rushed past us, nearly knocking Spike off of the tower. I caught him, made sure he was alright, and rushed off after her. When I arrived in Twilight’s room (which was, in truth, the tower’s private library), I saw her frantically looking through every book she could get her magic on.
“Okay, what is it this time?” I asked her, nearly getting a book to the face from scaring her.
“Shining!” She whined and berated. “How many times have I told you to not sneak up on me when I’m studying!”
“That looked less like studying and more like a panic attack.” Spike said, as he entered the library with Cadance behind him.
“So I’ll ask again: What is it this time?” I reiterated.
She hesitated for a brief moment before telling. “It’s the story about the Mare in the Moon, Nightmare Moon.” She explained. “From what I can theorize and remember, there is an obscure prophecy that states that she will be freed from her banishment on the moon on the longest day of the year. And her intentions will not be good.”
“And I’m guessing that that day is the Summer Sun Celebration and you hope to warn Princess Celestia about the potential danger...even if she more than likely knows about it and has a plan or maybe plans in place for the danger?” I asked, getting her slack-jawed in shock.
“How did you know?” Twilight asked.
“He’s your big brother, and Auntie Tia is over a thousand years old.” Cadance answered for me. “And if anything, she can sometimes be fairly predictable when it comes to handling threats...and three, two, one.” She finished counting and Spike ended up burping up a scroll. “That’s five bits, Shiny.” She said, getting me to groan in annoyance as I handed over the bits.
“Let’s see.” Spike said, while opening the scroll. He quickly read through it and then handed it over to Twilight. “Summary as far as I can tell: Princess Celestia wants you to head to Ponyville to oversee the preparations for the Celebration there. Alongside doing that, she has also asked you to make friends.”
Twilight took the scroll with her magic and read the scroll before sighing in defeat. “Well, I might as well. And the whole friends thing will be difficult, since outside of the family and your squad, I’ve never really had any real social interactions.” She said.
“Don’t worry, I’m sure my squad and Cadance will be willing to help, just as much as I am willing to help.” I said, patting her withers.
“Thank you, BBBBFF.” She said, hugging me as best as she could.
“You’re welcome, LSBFF.” I responded, hugging her back.
(Ponyville Outskirts, Shining POV)
“Dang it, Greg!” I shouted as I worked to pull myself and Gregory, one of my best friends and squadmates, out of the crash wreckage of my personal chariot. “That’s the fifth one this month alone!”
“Well if you would just lose some weight off of that fat arse of yours-” He began to complain, but was cut off from the other two chariots that contained the rest of my squad and my sister and wife.
“You guys okay?!” Twilight and Cadance called out from their position in the air.
“We’re alive at least!” I called back. I then looked over myself and Gregory. “Aside from a few bruises and scrapes, I’m okay. Gregory, however, will need at least some minor hospitalization for his wing at the least.” I explained as he splinted his broken wing with some chariot scrap and rope.
“Just go on ahead without us and inform the hospital that we’ll be coming shortly!” Gregory shouted to them. They then left and the griffin gave me a death stare. “And despite you being my senior officer, you owe me for the office chair incident, so haul your fat arse over here and carry me the rest of the way to Ponyville!” I picked him up and carefully placed him on my shoulders and began walking.
“I don’t mean to insult you, but this could have been avoided if you had Flash either help you pull me, or just let him do all the pulling while you handled one of the other chariots.” I said bluntly.
“Hey, hauling Titan is much easier than hauling you. I need a challenge to get stronger and impress Mid-” He quickly stopped himself and clamped his talons over his mouth. This gave me an opportunity to tease him, but I chose to help him instead.
“You know, you don’t need to impress Midnight to be with her.” I said calmly. “The next and best chance you get, you should just ask her on a date or something like that.”
Gregory blushed when I finished talking. “I should have kept my crush to myself.” He said.
“I won’t bother you about your crush; I’ll just help you when you make goofy mistakes.” I added with a slight chuckle. Gregory was quiet for the rest of the walk.
(Ponyville Hospital, Shining POV)
When we arrived at the hospital, the staff immediately took me and Gregory deeper in to take care of our respective injuries. Since my injuries were just bruises and scrapes, other than disinfecting the scrapes and healing up my body in general, nothing much was needed for me. Gregory, fortunately, wasn’t as injured as I had thought he was, the wing having been dislocated rather than broken, but with some small hairline fractures along all the bones in it. However, those hairline fractures were severe enough that he had to not fly for a good three weeks so that the bones can heal and he can get checked by the Canterlot Hospital.
“Well, I guess this can serve as a lesson for both of us.” Gregory said as we both walked out of the hospital.
“Yeah. You need to hitch yourself up to a chariot that doesn’t contain me, and I need to get into a chariot that you aren’t hitched to.” I joked, causing Greg to roll his eyes in slight annoyance while I laughed.
“Shut up. Where’s your sister and the remainder of our squad?” The annoyed griffin said, looking around and seeing no one in the area. Our attention was then grabbed by some loud music playing from a literal treehouse.
“My money’s there, and that it’s being hosted by one of those Bipolar Government Party Ponies.” I said, pointing to the treehouse. We walked closer and saw a sign, identifying the building as Golden Oaks Library. “Ten extra bits on top of our usual to compensate for Twily’s annoyance at a library being the center of a loud party.” I added.
“Deal.” He said, shaking my hand before opening the door. As soon as the door opened, a sugar rush in the form of a Bubblegum pink pony with pinkish red mane and tail grabbed both of us and pulled us into the building, defying physics in so many ways that I couldn’t tell you what she did, other than pulling a nearly 3-400 pound anthro unicorn into a building with no effort.
“SURPRIZE!!!” The living diabetic nightmare exclaimed after she pulled us in. “Are you the new guys in town, like these other ponies and minotaur!?” She asked, defying reality this time, pulling my wife and the other members of my squad into view from literally from nowhere.
“Yes.” I answered with a scared tone.
“Can you stop breaking reality and physics, please?” Gregory asked with the same scared tone.
The pink pony nodded. “Okie Dokie Lokie!” She said before pronking away. We watched her as she just hopped around and talked excitedly to everyone she saw.
“Well, she doesn’t seem to be bipolar and there is no confirmation of her being one of those Government Party Ponies. By the way, how annoyed was Twily about a library being used for something loud?” I said, pulling out a bag of bits without anyone but Gregory noticing.
“I think she was less concerned about that and more concerned about the cup of hot sauce she accidentally drank.” Cadance answered. I huffed and handed Gregory the bag of bits without her noticing.
I then noticed that the pinkie party pony pouring some hot sauce onto a cupcake and eating it. She noticed me staring and she gave me a bit of a glare. “What? It’s good.” She said. I backed up, holding up my hands in surrender as I stuck with my wife and squad.
(Ponyville Town Hall, Shining POV)
After the party, was the Celebration, which actually didn’t go all that well. Especially since the idiot of a Golden Standard (Royal Guard) Captain had his men charge at Nightmare Moon with no regard for proper strategy. And since Nightmare Moon is an Alicorn and all of his men and himself are pegasi, they never stood a chance and most of his unit was incapacitated and now hospitalized. And now I’m stuck in a meeting with Captain Butthead (that’s literally his name) and Ponyville’s Mayor...Mare...Mayor Mare is her name.
“-And that is why we need to find this Nightmare Moon, have her bring back our Princess, and then make sure she is executed for her crimes against Equestria and it’s Crown!” Butthead said with an air of superiority mixed the overconfidence.
“Okay, we know our goals and the reasons behind them, but what about the actual plan?” I stated, leaning against and somewhat bending a nearby pillar in the building.
“We find this Nightmare-” He began to parrot, but I cut him off.
“I mean the how!” I groaned, leaning back and hearing a creaking of wood. “Goddess! Can’t you understand what I’m trying to talk about! How do we go about finding Nightmare Moon?!”
“We follow her trail!” Butthead exclaimed as if I was the stupid one.
“Okay, we’ve got something of a plan starting up.” I said, genuinely pleased at his deduction. Now to test his forethought processes. “Did you post any of the Golden Standards outside with the clear objective of tracking any intruders that were leaving in a hurry?” Butthead then went pale. “And this is why many in the other branches of the Equestrian Military make fun of you guys. You are just tasked with standing around and looking pretty with the ‘official’ task of guarding the Princess...and you can’t even do that when things go downhill!” I shouted, moving to the desk we were using as a command desk.
“Then what do you and your band of misfits plan on doing about our missing Princess if, according to you, we, the Royal Guard, can do nothing? Eh? Captain ‘Tub-he’ Armor?!” Butthead taunted.
“Okay, first off, it’s pronounced ‘Tubby’; second off, my band of misfits just so happen to be lifelong friends of mine; third off, we can’t do anything either, since you guys don’t know proper military tactics. If anything, whatever remains of your unit, and my squad will have do combine resources just to keep the town from rioting!” I belted back at him, my voice nearly taking him off of his hooves.
Butthead quickly recovered and gave a sigh. “Then I’ll see about getting what’s left of my men to do patrols and to report anything suspicious or out of place.” He said.
“Better.” I muttered to myself, as he left the building. “Now, anything else that needs to be covered, Mayor Mare?”
“You and the Royal Guard covered the important points.” She said, giving me a bit of a fearful look. “I’ll take care of the rest...also, you have a strong set of lungs.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment.” I said as I exited the building and started to walk around town. Now, I should point out that even though me and my squad weren’t in uniform, most anyone could tell we were of the “Oddball Auxiliary Squad”. We never denied it, and if anything we openly embraced it.
I was nearing the Library and I spotted my wife, Twily, and five other mares leaving the library. Oddly, with the exception of the pink one, none of them seem to notice me, as if they were on a mission of some kind. I followed them as stealthily as I could (an amazing feat for me), until they reached the edge of the Everfree Forest. I’ve spoken with Dad a lot about the Everfree, and he said that what is considered natural outside of the forest, doesn’t entirely apply when inside the forest.
Twily, Caddy, and the other mares had a bit of a somewhat heated conversation before entering the forest. I was about to follow when I suddenly noticed a flash of what looked like daylight from the Everfree, but in a different area than where my sister, wife, and their friends went. I turned around and saw Midnight also observing the phenomenon. “Go back to town and keep working with the rest of the squad. I’ll investigate the mystery light.” I told her. She nodded, and quietly took flight back to town.
With a sigh I creeped towards the mystery light...and as I approached...I couldn’t help but think that I was in for a weird night.
Author's Note
This Chapter is about to come upon a crossover. Stay tuned for the next chapter.

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          Chapter 6: Portals and Demons (part 2)           
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Chapter 6: Portals and Demons (part 2)
(Military Checkpoint)
After a good night’s sleep and a breakfast of leftover pickles, had gotten myself cleaned up and ready for duty. All across the checkpoint, I saw the troops beginning to wake up from a pretty good night sleep themselves, looking more fresh and upbeat than they were before their sleeping. However, I noticed that all of the soldiers had some rather vulgar things drawn on them. I took a quick glance in a military vehicle’s mirror and looked at my face, and thankfully, those vulgar images were not on my face, but there was a pair of ‘Big Chungus’ on my cheeks and some cartoony looking swirls around my eyes.
“Celly! You got me good! Can you get down to the provisions tent and get to distributing disinfectant wipes?!” I bellowed out with a smile, just as the soldiers suddenly realized that they were pranked and began laughing in true happiness, both at each other and themselves. Celly complied with my request and began helping clean up.
After the Checkpoint was cleaned up, Soldier Boy, the three Alicorns, and myself went to the command tent to discuss our next target. “Okay, the next target should be easy to find. Gluttony has been spotted ripping open a wall to get into a bakery downtown. He’s described as a massive collection of maws that all come together to form a tunneling Titan of a serpent underground. We only know that it has a hidden part of itself because one of our men was captured by it and kept alive long enough to Morse a message to us about it.” Soldier Boy told us.
“Great, another sin straight out of Darksiders. It’s like someone was too lazy to come up with something original.” Celly said with an eye roll.
“That description, while sounding ugly and grotesque, is a lot better than what I had in mind...and I have a small-ish idea, but I don’t know if it will work.” I said, holding my stomach a bit in slight nausea. Luna gestured for me to go on, seeming interested in the potential idea. “It’s where we find and/or cobble together a food truck of some kind to draw Gluttony’s attention, and then strike. If you don’t understand what I mean Celly, think of the movie ‘Honey, I Blew Up the Baby’.”
She gave me a dumb look. “Gotta admit, never saw that one. I’m not much of a Screen Junkie, really.” She said.
“And it sounds grotesque. Who would watch a movie like that?” Tia asked, showing her horror as plain as day (ha). Celly and Luna had a similar look on their faces.
“The movie is a sequel to ‘Honey, I Shrunk the Kids’, which is a movie about an inventor accidentally shrinking his and his neighbor’s kids.” I explain. “Now, think of the opposite of shrinking and that’s what ‘blow up’ means for that movie’s context.”
“Oh.” The three alicorns said in embarrassment.
“Yeah, it’s actually pretty funny. You guys should watch it after this is over. But for now, I like your plan. Let’s get it set up.” Soldier Boy said. He then left the tent to start getting the plan set up. I followed him with Luna and Celly following me as Celestia went to work out things with her Paladins.
Celly turned to Luna and I. “I’m gonna go look for a truck with everything we need.” She said.
Luna stopped her. “No, you’re not. You don’t have a driver’s license and you can’t possibly drive in your current form.” She said.
“Who said I was gonna drive it?” Celly responded with a grin, tapping her horn.
“I’ll be the one that’ll drive.” I said. Luna, Celly and Soldier Boy gave me a weird look. “Hey, I may not have a current driver’s licence, but for one thing, I have the body to do it...mostly. Second thing, in this crisis, driver’s licences aren’t the thing to worry about. Third thing, I don’t want to take on Gluttony directly. Regardless if he is an abomination of lard, or a multi-mouthed, demon snake.” I pointed out. “I will have to also point out that the vehicle would need to be refitted for Automatic Transmission and my weight and strength.”
“You sure you wouldn’t be able to simply carry the truck after stripping most of it for parts?” Celly asked. “Your muscle mass combined with a little bit of levitation magic should make a skeleton of a truck easier to lift.”
“Oh! Assuming there’s no antimagic runes, Captain Armor should have enough magical prowess to lift the truck with his magic alone.” Luna added.
“Are we on the same page or are you thinking mostly the how and not the why, while I’m thinking of the why with a bit of how sprinkled in to make it happen?” I asked with a stern look at the both of them. “I personally don’t understand why you want me to drive or work with a truck’s skeleton and not a properly souped up, armored, and possibly armed truck.”
“Why drive when you could run? I think it’s better that than risking the truck flattening even after armoring it up.” Celly countered.
“Because, despite my running speed and strength, I have relatively horrendous running stamina.” I explained. “By having something that can handle my weight and drive fast will prevent me from getting exhausted and possibly eaten. I’d rather eat dinner and not be dinner.”
“Oh. Well alright then.” Celly conceded. I’m not exactly sure why she thought I was unstoppable like the Hulk, but unlike that guy, I have limits.
“So, now that this argument is over, think your boys can get a food truck upgraded to meet what will be needed to handle me?” I asked Soldier Boy.
“Just let us know how much weight it needs to shuttle and we’ll be on it.” He answered.
“Roughly 1 ton.” I said nonchalantly. This caused the nearby soldiers and the alicorns to look at me in shock. “What?”
“Ah, I see. Then they’re gonna have to rebuild the truck like an ice cream tank. I don’t think many vehicles beyond 18 wheelers can hold that much weight, even reinforced. It’ll have to sacrifice speed to be sturdy enough, and they may need to outfit it with treads instead of wheels.” Celly thought out loud.
“What about a half-track truck?” I asked. “A truck with the back wheels replaced with tank treads and the front wheels are still wheels?”
“Never heard of those before. Might be a good idea.” Celly said.
Soldier Boy nodded and jotted down some notes. “ It should be done by tomorrow. In the meantime, I suggest scouting for the whereabouts of the other two sins.”
“Alrighty then. Celly, want to take Luna around to check on the odd theories on Greed and Lust we came up with last night?” I asked her.
With a shrug and nod, Celly answered. “Sounds good to me.”
Luna nodded as well. “A simple task. Let’s depart right away.” She said, taking wing. Celly followed, leaving Solder Boy and myself alone to help the soldiers build the half-track food truck.
(Another Day Later)
It was a lot of work, but the vehicle was done. Aside from it’s half-track wheel orientation, the truck had some fancy looking exhaust pipes and a big intake system, probably to be loud to attract Gluttony’s attention. As we all looked on at the work of art that was completed, I couldn’t help but feel something was missing. “What should we have this thing advertised to be serving?” I asked for everyone to hear.
“All the sweets, especially ice cream, moon pie, and cake.” Celly suggested.
“Well, you heard the mare! Get to painting and see if some of those things can be scavenged and stored in the back of the truck!” I barked out, causing the soldiers to move into action. “And see if some weapons can be added.”
“I’m surprised their listening.” Celly commented.
“He’s an ally and a captain. There’s no reason not to recognise his authority.” Soldier Boy said. “That being said, it’s wise to remember that respect is earned, not given.”
“Something I think I partially earned from helping with Wrath and Sloth.” I speculated out loud. “That and the entertainment I provided yesterday with those boiled eggs.”
“In the meantime, I think Lust is a prime target. She had a Shrine of Obsession in a hair salon to the north, and she looks like a demonic variant of Yuan-ti.” Celly stated.
Tia shuddered at the mention of that species. “Oh, goodness. I hated having to fight those creatures.” She said. “Many of them used chain linked kunai in battle and it wreaked havoc on my and my sister’s healing processes.”
“Yikes. Sounds like Scorpion from Mortal Kombat...let’s hope Lust doesn’t have some kind of teleport ability or illusion powers.” Celly said, before cringing .
“Don’t tell me, she’s invisible behind me and eyeing me like a guy who can somehow make fat look good.” I said, not moving.
“No, just realising how badly I just jinxed it.” She explained.
“I hope we die.” I said sarcastically, getting everyone to look at me with wide eyes. “And I just reverse jinxed it, giving us a chance.”
Celly activated her magic, pulled out a rolled up newspaper and hit me upside the head. “No. Bad humor. Get that crap outta here. That’s a bad joke and you should feel ashamed, cuz that ain’t how it works.” She scolded in a goofy voice.
“Says Miss Celly Superstition.” I said back in an equally goofy voice, adding a ‘Hyuck’ to the end of it. I then went a bit more serious. “We’re dealing with literal demons, and reverse jinxing worked in my past life, so zip it.” I then activated my magic and sealed her mouth with a zipper.
Celly gave Tia and Luna a concerned look while subtly activating her magic. Luna then looked to me. “Where did you learn that spell?” She asked. “I’m curious if it’s the same conditioned, antimagic one that my sisters and I know.”
“I learned it from my Celestia as a means to handle my sister when she starts going full on anxiety with a hint of Doomsday.” I explained. “And no, there are no conditions or antimagic on it.” I walked up to Celly and unzipped her mouth with my hand. “It’s meant to take her by surprise and help her realize that she’s freaking out.”
Celestia suddenly got a look of realization. “Oh yeah! I completely forgot that I did that with our Shining too. It’s been so many years that I lost recollection of it in the face of all the chaos that’s taken place over the years.” She said.
“And probably unlike your Shining, I used it more often, trying to condition her to recognize her own anxiety. And I’ll probably keep using it, since I’ll request to have me and my squad stationed in Ponyville.” I said, before I suddenly realized something. “By the way, if I’m thinking correctly, your world has already passed ‘Dragonshy’ right?” I asked Celly.
Celly looked uncertain, but Celestia saved her. “I’m afraid the show isn’t an accurate portrayal of the order of events. While yes, the events of that episode have passed, it was one of the earliest events in Twilight’s leave from my tutelage. A more telling benchmark event is Discord’s first return and his re-defeat, which is what spawned Celly in my world. The next upcoming benchmark event is your wedding in around...2 and a half months.” She said.
“First off, I’m already married to Cadence in my world, so that event will be different.” I said. “Secondly, did you or did you not send Twilight to take care of that dragon in that episode...because from a proper tactical, strategic viewpoint, that would be stupid. Take that opinion as you will.”
“I have, and I’ll take your opinion under consideration.” Tia responded calmly.
Celly chuckled. “Yeah, our wedding is going to be different too. Because Chrysalis is invited to it.” She said.
“That might have some consequences, but considering the differences from our worlds from each other and the ‘original’, I have no idea what those consequences will be, so go ahead with that...now, don’t we have a few demons to take care of and a Pride to dismantle?” I said.
Celly grinned and nodded. “Yeah. Let’s get Gluttony to spill his guts.” She said.
I climbed into the loaded and painted half-track. I found that the steering and front seat was centered for me to work with. With a slight press of the gas pedal and flipping of a few switches, the vehicle roared to life. “If this vehicle survives Gluttony and the rest of the demons, I’m taking it home with me, no negotiations!” I yelled in happiness for everyone to hear over the loud engine.
As Celly looked to the Sisters, I put the vehicle in Drive and moved the vehicle to one of the exits of the checkpoint. The Alicorns all took flight and I made the vehicle follow them as best as I could. After a good hour or so, we arrived at a swampy looking area. I briefly muffled the engine’s sound with my magic and called out to the flying ponies. “Is this where Gluttony is stationed?!”
“No, this is where he patrols. We should see him in around a few minutes.” Luna answered in her RCV. I nodded and flipped a few switches, turning on the Ice Cream music to play loudly, but not deafeningly. The ground started to shake and Gluttony burst out of the swamp land and made to attack me with it’s many mouths and fat arms, pulling itself along rather fast.
I instantly floored the gas and got around the fat demon and started leading it along the edge of it’s swamp. “This Ice-Track calling into the checkpoint garrison.” I said in a provided radio that the vehicle had. “I have Gluttony’s attention. Directions to potential trap area requested.” I quickly swerved to avoid one of the demon’s fat arms.
“Lieutenant Solaris here. Keep him busy until our demolitions team can plant the prox mines.” I heard from the radio. “We’ll be setting it up at the other end of his domain. Royal Sisters, please help Ice-Track stay in one piece. Slow Gluttony down any way you can.”
“Copy that.” I heard either Celly or Tia from the radio. I put my attention back on the road and took a hard turn into an abnormally wide alley, chuckling a little when the demon nearly slid past the alley. I also saw beams of magic striking the beast’s eyes (wherever those were located) and mouths. I upped the volume on the music, keeping Gluttony on my trail.
After a while, we started getting close to Lust’s location, according to the Intel Celly and Luna got us. “Shining.” Celly or Tia called in. “Two blocks to your next left, Lust’s shrine of obsession is sitting in a broken down building. If we can lead Gluttony to her, we can probably make Gluttony crush her.” She suggested.
“Copy that, and keep your composure while I test her Fetish range.” I answered back while following her directions. I then switched the loudspeakers on the vehicle to stop playing music briefly and allowing me to speak through them. “Sexy Fat Boy coming through! Lots of Ice cream served with that Sexy Fat Boy! 1 ton of Sexy and Ice Cream for free!” I called out. Suddenly, a large, snake woman jumped out of a building and in front of the truck. The split second before the collision, her lustful and predatory grin turned into shock. The demoness was then ran over by me, with Gluttony close behind. “Confirm kill for me. I’m too busy to check myself.” I called into the radio as I switched the music back on.
A few minutes later, my request was answered. “Kill and banishment confirmed.” I heard one of them say.
“Excellent!” I said. “Demo Team, this is Ice-Track, Royal Sisters managed to work out an improvised plan to eliminate Lust while we’re working with Gluttony. Demons left are now at 2, with a possible third that is currently neutral.” I called over to the Lieutenant.
“Update received. Bring Gluttony to the trap, Demo team has secured an area and has rigged it to blow when you get here. You’ll know it when you see it.” The Lieutenant answered.
“Copy that.” I answered. Pulling the vehicle into a steep turn into the swamp land. While the vehicle was slowed a bit, the floatation devices they had installed allowed for it to still keep a decent speed ahead of the Demon. I did see illusions of advertisements for large breakfast meals, but I ignored them.
“I’m out of Mana. I need a ride back to camp.” I heard either Tia or Celly call out on the radio.
“Find a secure location and I’ll be by with the truck and a cake.” I answered as I started to see the trap area coming close. The area had some fresh signs of human life, that being a few barricades cleverly hidden by alleyway entrances. Driving past the barricades, I barely felt the ground cracking and definitely felt the ground giving way under Gluttony. When it’s heads were submerged in the swampy water, I switched off the music and turned down a different street. I shortly arrived at the area I last heard from Celly/Tia just as the trap exploded violently. “Confirm Gluttony’s last meal of shrapnel, and Celly or Tia, relay your current location and preferred cake flavor.” I called back through the radio.
Celly and Tia stepped into view, the latter seeming exhausted. “I don’t suppose you have Neapolitan?” Tia asked as she and Celly climbed into the vehicle.
“Kill confirmed. Banishing now.” Luna confirmed over the radio.
“Alright then, Luna, check up on Greed after you’re done, while I haul your Cakeflank of a sister and her other sister back to the Checkpoint.” I said, while I glanced back at Tia as she was gobbling down cake after cake while glaring at me.
“Of course.” Luna answered.
“I’ll see you at the Checkpoint Celestia.” The Lieutenant said.
“Alright, are you ladies comfortable back there?” I said to my two passengers.
“About as comfortable as we can be.” Celly answered for both of them, considering Tia’s cake binge.
“Very well. Next stop: The Checkpoint.” I then started driving the vehicle, but at a more mellow pace than what the chase was.
(Checkpoint)
An hour passes and we arrived at the checkpoint. We exited the truck and had Celestia ordered into bedrest. Celly and I began to wait for Luna to report back after she radioed in that she took a team of Paladins to Greed’s location. Tia insisted that we allow Luna to deal with it.
“So, I’m half guessing that Luna has a personal bone to pick with Greed?” I asked while munching on a tub of ice cream.
Tia nodded. “Yes. She has had an encounter with him before. He took something from her last time they met. She wants it back.” She answered. “And if I weren’t out of Mana, I would want to join her to take back what he took from me as well.”
“Oh yeah? What...is it, exactly? Do I have it too?” Celly asked in curiosity.
“You do. And you’re lucky to have it. It seems that, even if Greed has it, he can’t just suddenly have two of it due to your transformation. I don’t want it to be a widely known thing, however.” Tia said as she looked at me.
“Okay, I’ll leave you two be. I’ll be over at the checkpoint vehicle pit, making the final changes to my half-track, and have it ready for magic engine installation.” I said as I walked to the pit, where I saw Soldier Boy (aka, the Lieutenant). “Lieutenant.” I greeted.
He turned to look at me in surprise. "Captain." He greeted. "Something you needed before nightfall?" He asked.
“Not really, outside of modifying the half-track to better allow for passengers in the back and to have a stronger engine.” I told him. “I’m just letting Tia and Celly have some sister to sister time.”
"Ah. Alright, I'll see to it it's built for quadrupeds. You did say that those in your world are actually quadrupeds, correct?" He asked to verify.
“Pretty much, but there are a few biped species and individuals.” I answer. “A minotaur member of my squad and my wife are the only bipeds that will be riding the vehicle...maybe driving if I get the ‘umph’ to teach them.”
"Hah. First car in Equestria. I wonder how effective it would be, considering there's no roads it can use to my knowledge." He says thoughtfully.
“There are roads, just not like what is here...mostly.” I answered. “And the stronger engine would be using Mana Gel as fuel, making it literally impossible for it to pollute the air in Equestria.”
"That's good. We'll help you out as much as we can." He told me.
“Okay then.” I made a metal cutter with my shield spell and walked over to the half track. “An open back or no?” I asked him.
“Might as well keep the door it already has.” The Lieutenant said as he closed the back doors of the truck.
“Okay.” I said, happy to have a new friend.
“Greed’s death...and banishment...confirmed.” Luna reported over the radio, sounding exhausted. “Returning...to the Garrison.” Well, last demon is Pride now. Good luck, us.
(Morning)
When morning came, the checkpoint was abuzz with activity. I went to where the Lieutenant and Celly were standing and saw a false angelic demon approaching. The demon’s appearance seemed to echo Mercy from Overwatch. Just give the armor gold plating, add a three horned mask and grey hair and you got it’s look.
“So, is this Pride?” I asked, almost hoping it wasn’t. The demon approached the Holy Barrier and stared at all of us.
“Unfortunately, it is.” Celestia said with a sad sigh.
“So is she here to surrender or is she gonna say that she knows that she can’t win but wants to fight anyway because tradition?” I asked, slightly louder, so that Pride could hear the question. I then look towards Pride. “I don’t mean any offence if those choices aren’t the case!” I told her.
“Tradition isn’t my strong point. Rather, I’m here to congratulate you on your victories. All of my brothers and sisters have fallen at your heel. Truly an accomplishment to be proud of.” She said, giving a small rise in my personal pride.
“Unfortunately, our job isn’t done yet.” Celestia said, seeming to offend the demon.
“Before you make a tragic mistake,” Pride said with a hiss, “Consider this. You’ve seen the state of this city. Of this world, really. Humanity has shown it’s sins by summoning us to the world. I believe if we work together-” She was cut off when Celly fired off a bolt of magic at her, which only bounced off of a shield in front of her.
“Cut the crap, Pride. Everyone here knows how ugly pride is, untempered by humility and discipline. Neither of which you have. Now either you hit the road back to hell, or we send you packing anyway. It’s our only deal for you.” Celly shot back with a glare.
“And while you aren’t wrong about humanity, your idea will more than likely strip humanity of their ability to choose right and wrong.” I said to her, while casting my Flesh Armor spells on everyone present (except Pride). “The thing about humanity is that they will stumble and fall, but their purpose in life is to do that and get back up, learning from their mistakes and sins. And nobody but Christ himself is perfect, so mistakes happen and will never end.” This drove Pride into a frenzied rage, but before she erupted, she suddenly composed herself.
“Very well.” She said, as she composed herself. “If you insist on driving me out of Earth, then follow me to my domain...if you dare.” She said, before opening up a rift and passing through it.
“Cute. She still thinks she’s superior to us.” Celly commented as she looked at Tia, who had an unreadable expression that seemed to hide some inner turmoil.
“I think it's best that I stay out of this fight. Pride is my worst sin… There is no telling how badly this could tear me apart.” Tia admitted.
Luna frowned in disappointment. “Sister, I would recommend you at least try. The only way to overcome your sins is to face them head on. I should know this.” Luna said in encouragement.
“You are right… but I'm afraid.” She admitted.
The Lieutenant walked forward and placed a hand on her withers. “Hey, you got this. If you can put on a facade for over a thousand years, you can hold up against this.” He said, getting her to smile.
“Thank you for the confidence… I'll try. But chances are, Celly will be pulling most of the weight.” Tia said, looking at Celly.
“Sure. Leave it to the beacons of self loathing to take on Pride.” She joked.
“And are you sure she should be handling our weight of work? I’m not sure if she can handle one ton or greater.” I joked.
Celly grinned. “Whatever you say, person within sunslamming distance.” She joked. She then began to enter into the rift. “Everyone coming to kick Pride’s ass to the curb, come along. We might need grenade launchers.”
Tia and Luna followed Celly, and I followed them with the Lieutenant beside me, followed by a fair handful of troops and Paladins. The realm or pocket dimension was a large pantheon area that was plated with gold and platinum, and was lined with many kinds of gems and valuable decorations.
“Well, if her plan is to dazzle us to death, then it’s half working.” I said, actually impressed by the design and looks of the place.
“It's honestly a waste of good material. It could be used to buy something practical, like I could use it to commission an army's worth of pony fitted guns.” Celly said.
“Not a bad idea. Assuming the place stays intact after we kill Pride.” The Lieutenant pointed out.
“Speaking of Pride-” I paused and pointed forward at a set of overly well crafted double doors that started opening. “-She’s here.” I cast stronger Armor Flesh Spells and readied my fists with shields around them.
Celly pushed the doors open the rest of the way, revealing an ornate arena. It was filled with traps, mostly of the impaling variety. There was a platinum statue of Pride as well, which seemed built for combat as well. The Sisters and I followed Celly in after she entered. “Looks like someone is as predictable as ever.” She taunted. “One has to wonder what you pride yourself on, if it isn’t your obvious, yet meaningless wealth.” Those words seemed to affect her almost physically, as Pride had to clutch her head for whatever reason.
“I knew you would be a headache the minute I laid eyes on you. If you truly insist on trying to kill me like insufferable worms, then you may die trying.” Pride hissed in anger. The hands on the statue shot towards us, but with a subtle gesture from Celly, Celestia jumped forward with a warhammer, smashing them to bits. I activated a barrier to keep the rubble from covering us.
“What a waste. I’m not sure what you think your traps and crap are going to do. You have three masters of magic in this room. Only an idiot would think their enchantments could hold up against us.” Celly taunted again. Pride screeched in rage and pain at those words. As she was going crazy, Celly looked to Luna. “Quick, we need to disable the self repair runes.” She whispered. “Can you keep Pride’s attention?” She asked me.
I nodded at her and charged forward, tackling Pride’s midsection and knocking the air out of her lungs. When she landed, I moved to kneeling on her chest and started punching her, over and over, all while she was trying to recover her breath and her composure. A few traps swung at me, but my flesh armor spells managed to keep them from harming me, causing them to bounce back into their places and break. I heard some noise in the background, but I was only paying attention to beating up Pride. After a few minutes of me beating her, she ended up managing to push me off of her, but the damage was done.
“Enough!” A now bloodied up Pride screamed. “Putrid vermin like you don’t deserve to touch me!” She then raised a barrier of ‘holy’ light, but a Paladin was able to penetrate it with his hammer, making a decently sized hole. The Lieutenant managed to get a grenade through that hole. Pride looked at in brief confusion before it blew up, destroying the barrier and killing the demon.
“*Bleep* yeah. And they told me playing Horseshoes and Hand Grenades wouldn’t help me in any way.” The Lieutenant cheered, high fiving one of his team members.
“Hell yeah. VR for the win” Another soldier cheered.
I noticed Celly cutting out Pride’s heart while a Paladin was banishing the body. “Rest in Thanos’ snap, bitch.” She joked.
“You talking about the Greek God of Death or the Mad Titan from Endgame/Infinity War?” I asked as I walked up to her.
“The latter.” She answered. “Didn’t know there was a god by that name.”
She handed the heart to the Paladin, and he spoke up. “Let’s get out of here before this place disappears.” He said to her. She nodded and called out to leave.
As we left, I grabbed a few pink diamonds from a nearby wall before exiting through the portal back to the human world. “Well, that was fun. Who’s for Chinese? I’m paying.” I asked the three alicorns, showing the diamonds I snagged.
“Sure, I miss orange chicken.” She replied. Celestia and Luna looked at her briefly before shrugging.
“When in Roam.” Luna quoted, getting Tia to giggle.
“Alright then.” I led the alicorns to my remodeled truck and took the driver’s seat. “Lieutenant? Can you give me directions and maybe an escort to the nearest and still in business Chinese restaurant?”
“New York has been completely evacuated. The nearest place is the next city over.” He told me. “But I can let you guys know when the city is back to normal.”
“Sounds fair. We can also check back in a few hours or days, however long it’ll take for that to happen.” I said. I then looked to the alicorns. “Let’s say our brief good-byes and get back to the portal. I’m driving.”
The alicorns loaded into the back and I started driving. It took a few minutes to get close to the portal to Celly’s Equestria, but something came out of the portal as we got close, and I had to slam the brakes to keep from hitting it...or rather, her.
I got out of the driver’s seat and on the street, looking my wife over in shock and fear. “Honey, why are you in armor, and why are you here?”
She sighed and turned to the portal just as Twily exited the portal with a look of wonder on her face. “Twilight, honey, can you go back and inform the Squad that I found him and that they have my express permission to wait at the local bar.” Cadance asked of my sister. Twily was shook the wonder off of her and nodded to her request. Cadance turned back to me with a serious glare. “We need to have some words...Now, if possible.”
“Blame me!” I heard Celly shout as she exited the truck, seeming to want to take punishment from my wife.
“James Solaris! This is between me and my wife!” I shouted at her. “And I’m gonna have to ask you to load Caddy into the truck and when we get back to your world, get some tea started up. I think you accidentally broke her.” I gestured to my wife, who now had a deer-in-the-headlights look while staring at Celly.
“Sorry.” She said, activating her magic and placing my wife in the truck. I then climbed in and carefully drove the truck into the portal and parked it in the Canterlot maze.
“This is going to be a long debrief when I get home.” I muttered as I shut off the truck and climbed out, readying myself for the hell that awaited me.
Author's Note
Part 2. Hope you enjoy.

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          Chapter 7: Portals and Demons (part 3)           
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Chapter 7: Portals and Demons (part 3)
(Celly’s Equestria)
Tia, Celly, Caddy and I were sitting in an isolated and luxurious lounge room, while Luna had gone off to get some rest after the crazy few days we went through. When one of the maids came in with the tea, I nodded in thanks and took the tea from her magic. I poured each of us a cup and then sighed. “So, who wants to say something first?” I asked, attempting to break the silence.
Celly shrugged. “I dunno. I was waiting for Cadance to say something.” She said, seeming to get giddy about something.
“What do you want me to say?” Caddy said in slight frustration. “I’ve never drank excessively before, so I’m ruling out seeing double from being drunk. Maybe seeing double from either an illusion spell or Twilight’s occasional rambles about the Multiverse are more true than most have thought.”
“Actually that last one's pretty much on the spot. I don't know why I became a clone of Celestia, but Discord ended up summoning me from my world during his brief freedom about a month or two ago.” Celly told her.
“And now you just confirmed that Celestia back home has everything in place like a perfect chess master...and I don’t like it.” Caddy said before lightly face planting herself on the table.
“You can now see some of my frustration with my Celestia’s preferred methods of doing things. AKA, ‘Throwing children into the middle of the ocean over several centuries and hoping they figure out how to swim instead of drowning and returning as resentful young-adults’.” I said with an annoyed sigh.
“I’m not that ba-” Tia tried to protest, but Celly interrupted.
“No, he’s right. Unless time travel is involved, you have no excuse.” She said. “And I know I introduced timeline breakage by knowing what happens ahead of time anyway. But before that? You put a child against a God of Chaos and an edgy parasite controlling your sister. If I didn't know that you didn't already know the timeline before you met me, I'd probably call you out on your shit in public.”
“And I can tell that Tia here is more accepting of things going against the norm.” I said to the two sisters. “When Cadance and I got married behind her back, Celestia was nearly ready to use time travel to murder me because she had ‘the perfect marriage date’ planned out for us. Heck, when she was trying to dissolve the Equestrian military, I put my boots down and started a petition among as many ponies I could get it to. She looked ready to have an aneurysm or something...I wonder if her living as long as she has and having no one to connect to on a personal level has given herself a little bit of insanity.”
“Oh. Well she obviously lost her prank book somewhere along the line. I kept things in check, yes, but the one thing I prioritized while my sister was gone was my sanity.” Celestia stated.
Caddy raised her head off the table. “Why are you all talking like you all know the future?” She asked.
“If you understand the concept of reincarnation and the multiverse, then basically, in my past life, I knew about certain points of the future of Equestria.” I said. I then pointed to Celly. “She, however, is closer to the source material than I am on that subject.”
“In short, because we do.” Celly stated bluntly.
“So, that means that Shiny knew I was to marry him?” Caddy asked.
“Yes, but also no.” I said. “With the fact that I’m much different that what the ‘original’ timeline version of myself is, I could have easily married someone else. But, we got together after I comforted you after getting bullied, and the rest is history.”
“Different from the ‘original’? What do you mean?” Caddy asked, starting to get a little confused.
“To answer that, let's start from the beginning. You know that ruined world you saw through the portal? Well, that world is dominated by humans. They have no magic, so they invented lots of technology for a lot of different purposes. In entertainment technology, they made a way to share made up stories and Lauren Faust made up a show based on the events surrounding Twilight Sparkle and her exceptionally chaotic journey towards learning about harmony. But that story only tells one version of the events. Alien factors, such as me appearing, or shiny here having been human before he… died?” Celly paused with a question. I nodded to her and she continued. “Well, long story short, simply knowing the future is enough to change it drastically. Otherwise, the butterfly effect kinda alters the course of events on it's own too. On top of that, there are versions of Equestria where Twilight is actually a stallion, so there are natural changes associated with those timelines too.”
“That makes so much sense...and yet it doesn’t.” Caddy said, placing her head on the table with a sigh. “Faust almighty, give me a sign that this Celestia clone isn’t just insane.” She prayed in a mumble.
“I will neither confirm nor deny my sanity or lack thereof.” Celly said with a mischievous grin. Suddenly, the lounge door opened and Celly’s Cadance and Shining (me? No. I’ll refer to him as Al Shining) entered the room.
“Hey, Celestia? Have you- Oh. I see you're a little busy…” Al Shining said. While he spoke, C Cadance looked at Caddy in slight confusion before looking at Celly and shrugged.
“Don't worry about it. I only accidentally connected to another Equestria.” Celly told the two.
“Right… a different equestria where I look like an overweight potato.” Al Shining said, eyeing my belly.
“Honey, even if you're talking to another you, that was still rude.” C Cadance sternly said to him.
“Right...sorry.” Al Shining said.
“It’s okay. By the way, for future reference, that’s musclegut or sumo build. Nothing about overweight potatoes. Got it?” I told him, flexing my arm a bit to show some of my ‘hidden’ muscles. The couple seemed to have a combination of awe and ‘mind blown’ when they saw my muscles.
“Oh, wow. Okay.” Al Shining said with awe.
C Cadance suddenly remembered the question she had. “Oh yeah, Celestia. Have you heard back from Queen Chrysalis yet? I'm getting a little worried that we're going to have to use the barrier after all.” She said.
“Oh! I did receive a letter from her, actually. I just haven't gotten to read it yet due to the hectic events in the human world.” Tia said. She stood up and left to collect it.
Celly turned to Caddy. “Any more questions?”
“No, other than a favor for Shiny to not make me pregnant between now and next week. I’m gonna try to get a little drunk to hopefully forget some of the events of today.” She said froStill kinda scary to see what my kid could do to the Crystal Empire…m her face down position.
“Oh don't worry. If there's any measure of timeline adherence, neither of you will be pregnant for at least another year.” Celly told both Cadances.
“Still kinda scary to see what my kid could do to the Crystal Empire…” C Cadance muttered to herself.
“You know what, forget getting drunk, I need to see what you are talking about the next time we visit, because I need to get Fat Boy here-” She elbowed my belly. “-Back home so he can be debriefed and get his official assignment to Ponyville to watch over the Seven Element Bearers alongside his squad.” Caddy’s words shocked the other members of the group.
“I’m sorry, *bleep*ing what?!” Celly asked in disbelief.
“Wow. Even she's surprised. That's saying something.” Tia said as she re-entered the room.
“Honesty, Kindness, Laughter, Generosity, Loyalty, Magic, and Love.” Caddy listed off. “A largely overlooked portion of the Elements is that there can be more than just the six most reference guides would list. And our Celestia was ready to murder me when she saw me with an Elemental Necklace.” She said, waving her hand nonchalantly.
“Oh, thank goodness. I was expecting a terrible oc character when you said there were seven. Way too many fanfiction stories give the writer's character the seventh element, and they always make it something unrelated to friendship, like Hope, magitech, and other stuff like that. There aren't enough good "seventh element" stories out there.” Celly said in relief.
“Well, you can’t count those possibilities out.” I said as I stood up, Caddy following suit. “Now, I’ll be back in a week and I’ll try to bring the requested items that you have requested.” I then left the lounge and barely managed to bumble my way through the maze of a castle and hedge maze.
“Just so you know, you were gone for about three days.” Caddy told me as we loaded into the truck. “Thank Faust that Midnight Nebula told us of you investigating what you did.” I nodded and gave my sweet beloved a kiss before turning on the truck and working it through the portal to home.
Author's Note
Final part of this crossover. There will be more crossovers with this story/author and others in the future.

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            Chapter 8: Setting Things Straight             
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Chapter 8: Setting Things Straight
(Ponyville Outskirts)
Our arrival home wasn’t exactly a warm welcome type. As soon as my truck had exited the portal on my side, the truck was surrounded by several dozen Royal Guards armed with spears (a good number of them comically held the wrong way) and one angry looking Solar Alicorn. I was hauled from the truck by Celestia’s magic and dragged to a command tent that was set up near the portal.
I was then tied up and placed in the center of what seemed to be a set of runes for what seemed to be a ritual of some sort. “Now, let’s see what is causing you to interfere with my plans for the future.” The alicorn said, her mane sparking a little bit as she activated her magic.
I quickly and calmly broke out of my binds and grabbed Celestia’s horn (which seemed rather hot for some reason...and I’m speaking temperature, not sex appeal). “With all due respect, Your Highness, what is wrong with you?!” I said with a raised voice. “You’re acting less like the Princess you should be and more like a control freak who has major OCD and want literally everything perfect in the way you think perfect is!”
Celestia didn’t seem to pay attention to what I said. “Supposed to be 6, not 7. Dimensional breaches need closing. Marriage later during crisis. Military unneeded while at peace.” She began to repeat in a crazy tone, her eyes crossing and separating and her mane taking more qualities of fire than a pastel rainbow. She briefly broke her mad ramblings long enough to shout out to the Royal Guards outside the tent. “Destroy the portal! Captain Armor and Princess Cadance have been brainwashed! It’ll break the control from the aliens!”
I smashed her face against my knee and left her gibbering about the imperfections of time while I left the tent and tried to rush to save the portal. However, it seemed that the portal was in good (proverbial and somewhat literal) hands, as Cadance was defending the portal alongside my Squad, despite her orders to go to a bar.
And ‘defending’ was less of what they were doing for the portal, since with her and my Squad were between them and the portal, seeming to get the idiots in gold to focus only on them and not on the portal, despite their superior numbers. And this wasn’t a fight, it was an assembly line of pain...literally. The Royal Idiots seemed to just go single file in attempting to take on Cadance and other members of my Squad, only to be comically punted to the side by Titan or Cadance or grabbed by the scruff of their necks by Greg or Midnight and tossed to the side.
While I was attempting to comprehend Celestia’s mental break and the Guard’s idiocracy, I looked to the portal and saw a concerned Celly and Tia on the other side. Celly shook off her shock and stepped through to intervene.
“Okay What The Actual *BLEEP*!” She shouted with the Royal Canterlot Voice. This got all the idiots in gold to stop fighting and immediately bow to her before attempting to continue the painful assembly line. Celly looked at me with a confused look. “I leave you for ten minutes and you’ve got a pain train lined up? What the hell happened?” She asked.
I opened my mouth to answer, only to be interrupted by the command tent going up in flames, revealing Celestia in a nightmare form...Daybreaker, I think it was called. “Disturbances to the balance of this world...must...be...eliminated.” She said while her neck twisted around 360 degrees. She then made to jump at Celly, but my fist to her face stopped her midair. She then collapsed on the ground and dissolved into mad giggles.
“Yeah, right back at you. Calm your shit and get up off your ass.” Celly taunted. Daybreaker didn’t respond other than to start muttering incoherently.
“She seems a bit beyond repair currently.” I said to her. I heard the flapping of wings and a slightly depowered Luna landed next to Daybreaker.
“It’s as I feared. My actions a millennium ago must have been more damaging than I would have originally thought.” She said, pulling a book out of a set of saddlebags. The book seemed to be bound in bloody leather and had a twisted mockery of Tia’s Cutie Mark on it. She gave it to me and I opened it, only to close it.
“The insane ramblings of a mad pony are written here.” I said, opening the book and showing Celly the repeated ‘the future must be perfect’ written everywhere inside.
“And those writings are literally on every surface of her study and bedroom. The only thing hiding them is a rather brittle and easily breakable illusion spell.” Luna said. “And here’s a picture I had a maid take...this time is different, and yet better.” She pulled a picture of the study out of the bag and showed it to us.
“This is… very very disturbing. To think I could have been like this…” Tia muttered as she exited the portal and looked over Daybreaker. “And this form...It’s a twisted mockery of my locked power. It’s as if it’s been corrupted by dark magic...I can’t even recognise myself.”
“This isn’t reality.” Daybreak said, slowly standing up, while her limbs started twisting in unnatural ways. “This isn’t my reality. Must fix the mistakes. Kronica, give me power.” Daybreaker activated her magic and her magic took a look of fiery sand and it started to swirl around us. A few seconds in and it stopped. “Wha...Kronica, have you forsaken me?” She collapsed on the ground again and cried sand, intermingled with mad giggling every so often.
“No. You have forsaken Harmony. Your mad pursuit of Order has blinded you to reality.” Tia scolded firmly. “Your reckless use of time travel spells sickens me. You are not fit to lead our little ponies. As your alternate self, I am telling you that it is best that you give up your crown for the time being.”
Daybreaker paused in her laughing crying to look at Tia with an angry eye. She stood up and made to stab her with her horn, but an ice spell from Luna to the back of her head extinguished her mane and tail and caused her to faint. “Mommy, she put my hair out again.” She said before losing consciousness.
“...Ugh. Where's Pinkie Pie when you need her?” Celly groaned. “This whole situation has drained the laughter right outta me.”
“Her and the other Bearers are currently taking some time to recover from what I had revealed to them about Daybreaker.” Luna said, pulling out a magic suppression ring and placing it on her. “So, you are going to have to rely on your version of the Element of Laughter to do that.”
“You seem to be more accepting of alternate universes than Daybreaker here.” I commented.
“Accelero provides plenty of relativistic years to study up on things of the modern era. It doesn’t mean I’ll get used to it or like it, but it helps.” She said. “I leave her punishment up to you, Alternate Sisters.” She walked off.
“Huh. Do gods have a stronger sway in this world? I've never heard those names before.” Tia asked.
“It’s a speed spell.” I answered bluntly. “Luna used the spell to study fast. A relative decade at least in the span of a few minutes or hours.”
“Oh.” Both alicorns said in realization.
“We just named spells after what they did.” Tia said.
“Accelero just sounds like my Perception Shift spell.” Celly added. “Really, there’s no need to give it fancy names. This is Equestria, not Hogwarts.” This got Tia to giggle a bit.
“Some spells haven’t been renamed, like almost irrelevant spells from long ago.” I said. “Jumping onto the topic Luna wants us to address, what should we do with Daybreaker?”
“I have a scholar in my world who studies mind magic and mental afflictions. I believe he may be of help in setting my alternate self back in line.” Tia said, chuckling slightly. “And wouldn't you believe it, it's his magic that helped me and my Luna sort things out after the Harmony blast weakened her.”
“Any objections from the presently gathered?” I asked, looking around from the pile of idiots to my Squad. “What about Celly, any objections?”
“I don’t see why not.” She answered.
“Good. I think you’ll like him.” Tia said as she levitated Daybreaker onto her back and walked back through the portal with Celly following.
“Well, that was fun.” I said, looking to my Squad as they had confused looks on their faces. “Umm, you want the long or short version.”
“Short.” My squad answered simultaneously.
“Alternate universe.” I said, pointing a thumb at the portal. The Squad nodded in understanding and looked at me expectantly. “For now, keep the portal safe while I head into town and check on my sister and see if Luna is willing to have a small base built around the portal.” I commanded.
“Sir! Yes Sir!” They said before taking posts around the portal.
“Caddy, I hope I’m not overstepping my bounds as your husband to ask if you are willing to help the Royal Guards recover from their ‘battle wounds’ and tell them to start looking for new work?” I asked.
“Don’t worry.” She said as she began picking up the idiots and dusting them off. “You’re not overstepping anything. Just get going on your tasks.”
I nodded and got into my truck and got it moving towards Ponyville.
(Ponyville Proper)
Driving my truck through town was rather easy, but it was somewhat scary driving through town. Since most ponies never saw or heard of a truck, they were both scared and unpredictable. Thankfully, in their unpredictableness, they kept away from the truck by either being frozen in fear, or taking refuge in the nearest set of cover, like a building or a bush.
It took a few minutes before I arrived at the Town Hall. Ponies stepped out of hiding once I stopped the truck and got out. Entering the building, Luna was discussing something with Mayor Mare. Approaching the two, Luna looked up and greeted me. “Ah, the Fat Captain. Come in. We were just about to discuss some details concerning you.” She said.
“The Auxiliary Captain?” The Mayor asked in slight confusion. “I thought you said that the town would get a small military garrison, not just an Auxiliary Squad.”
“Their track record in service, as well as their Captain’s exemplary status as the ‘Saviour of the Equestrian Military’ is why I’m recommending him and his Squad to be that garrison.” Luna turned to me with a somewhat expectant look. “If he is willing to accept.”
I nodded to the Princess. “That I do. I just hope the town has a few houses for sale and that they don’t mind a Princess moving into town.” I said in response.
“Princess Luna, are you moving into town?” The Mayor asked her.
“I believe he is talking about his wife, Princess Mi Amore Cadenza.” Luna said, looking at me with a slightly questioning look. I nodded to her unspoken question satisfying her.
“Quick question before I go check on my truck; you know where Twilight is? When you said she had to recover from the news you gave her concerning Celestia-” I spoke, but Luna interrupted part way through.
“She is recovering with her friends in the Golden Oaks Library upper floor.” She said. “Go handle your sister. I’ll wrap up things with the Mayor.” She gently gestured for me to ‘shoo’.
I followed her orders and left the building to my truck. Said truck was surrounded by curious ponies: the ones closest to the building noticed me coming first and parted for me to get into the truck. “Okay, everyone. Time for all of you to step back. I’m gonna start this up and I need the driving space so I’m not running over anyone.” I said to the gathered ponies. They heeded my words and back up a lot. I then started the truck, scaring some ponies, but putting the others in awe. I then drove through the crowd (thankfully not running anyone over), and got to the library.
Inside the library, a nurse and a doctor was seated at the library’s central table, sipping tea and talking. “Scanning Ms. Sparkle’s mind has revealed that the corruption of Celestia’s mind could have been part of her nearly breaking herself.” The doctor said to the nurse, while showing some scans and notes related to the scans.
“And don’t forget the major OCD she has, the plot worship she had when anything involving Celestia is brought up, and the full blown anxiety she gets when anything isn’t perfect according to her.” The nurse shot back, pulling out a larger set of notes. “Luna had the Upper Canterlot Hospital send me a copy of all her records.” She said to him, answering the doctor’s unasked questions.
I cleared my throat, getting the two medical ponies attention. “I know there’s the whole ‘Doctor-Patient confidentiality’, but can I have a summary on my sister’s mental damage?” I asked them.
The doctor took a moment to comprehend what I said. “Oh, Captain Armor. Yes, of course. Your sister, at least to a certain scale, has a similar mental state that Celestia, now Daybreaker, has.” He said.
I must have looked ready to freak out, because the nurse quickly interjected. “‘Similar’ is the key word in describing her condition.” She said, calming me down quickly. “Comparing an immortal’s mind to a mortal’s mind is like comparing is like comparing a fancy vase to a glass cup. While both are breakable, the vase is easier to break and harder to replace or fix.”
“So,on a scale of 1 to 10 (1 being perfectly fine, and 10 is insane asylum), how bad is she?” I asked.
“I’d give her a range of 7 to 8.” The doctor said. “It would have been higher if she hadn’t have had such supporting friends. You may see her, if you’d like. Maybe you being there would bump the number down a bit?”
I nodded and went up the stairs to the upper floor bedroom(?) and peeked inside. There, literally stuck in a huge group hug, was Twilight. She was accepting the hug while seemingly stuck crying in both joy and sorrow. She noticed me and extracted her forelegs so she could gesture that she wanted to be held by me. I carefully pulled her out of the pony pile and then sat against the wall, letting Twilight to curl up on my belly to cry herself to sleep. Twilight’s friends followed me to the wall when I extracted her from them and they curled around me and rested while watching my sister.
“This is going to be interesting when Cadance comes looking for me.” I muttered under my breath as I stroked Twily’s back to comfort her as she slept.
Author's Note
huge plot twist and a little bit of a crossover with Switchlock's story (for a brief moment to get the plot twist going).

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              Chapter 9: Proper Ticket Master              
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Chapter 9: Proper Ticket Master
(Ponyville, Armor Household)
Waking up gently is a blessing that every male should cherish in life. Especially when the means of the gentle wake up is either a perfect smelling breakfast or a good back rub and maybe a smooch from a spouse (I’m straight, but I don’t judge males with male spouses). Waking up suddenly or getting scared awake is a different story.
Such is the case when I was slightly stirred awake from the sound of a mob near our place. It was only a few seconds after that I heard the door open and close hard, which is what scared me awake. Within a few seconds of the door slamming closed, I grabbed my collapsable sword and was in the front entryway before the intruder could have a chance to react. Thankfully, I kept myself from stabbing the intruder, who happened to be my sister.
“Twily, what are you doing?” I asked tiredly. “It’s just before seven am. and I could have killed you with the way you got inside.”
Twilight, holding onto the look of terror she had on her face, quickly ran behind my legs and hid like a scared puppy. “I don’t know why the entire town is going crazy over one ticket!” She exclaimed.
“What ticket are you talking about?” I asked as I collapsed my sword into its compact form.
Twilight came out from behind my legs with a slight deadpan look mixed with her fear. “The Golden Ticket to the Grand Galloping Gala!” She said, but then quickly covered her mouth with a hoof, her terror seeming to escalate. “You want the ticket too?”
I sighed and rubbed my eyes in slight frustration. “Twilight, did you forget that ever since I married Cadance, I’ve attended that Gala each year.” I told her. It took her a few seconds, but when it dawned on her that I have been attending the Gala each year, I continued talking. “So what use is a ticket to the Gala when I already go to it?” I asked.
“Oh, you have a point, but I need to hide here until the mob is gone.” She said.
“Okay.” I said. “Give me a moment to get Cadance up and get started on breakfast.”
“It’s breakfast already?” She asked as I stumbled my way to the master bedroom.
“What time did you wake up and what were you doing to think that it was later in the day?” I asked with a hint of confusion in my voice.
“I woke up around 5 am to help Applejack with some of her harvest. Princess Luna sent two tickets near the end of it and ever since, I’ve been hounded for the second ticket for most of the morning, according to the time you mentioned.” She explained. She then sheepishly smiled. “I also could have sworn that it was darker than normal.”
“Either Luna is a prankster, or she didn’t mean to get your times confused and it turns out that some of your insanity is acting up.” I said. Twilight frowned slightly at what I said, causing me to quickly try to fix her assumption. “I meant no offense when I said that. As a matter of fact, I’ll see if Luna can visit so I can discuss what just happened and how to prevent it from happening again.”
“Thank you.” She said, taking a seat on the couch and started to doze off. I got to the master bedroom, giving Cadance a few rubs to wake her before I searched for the fire mail lantern I was given for such purposes like today.
“Honey, who was at the door?” Cadance asked tiredly as she sat up on the bed and stretched.
“Twilight.” I said, finally finding the lantern and grabbing two scrolls and a pencil. “She’s been hounded by a mob most of the morning to the point of confusing time.”
“Oh, in that case, I’ll head down and get started on breakfast.” She said, getting up and putting on a pink and fuzzy pair of pyjama pants and a white tank tank top with her cutie mark on it.
I nodded in agreement as I went to my office and sat at my desk. I then quickly wrote out two letters, one for Luna, the other for the Ponyville Doctor, both detailing a need to talk at my place to determine the best ways to prevent mental breakdowns or confusion moments like this morning. Burning the letters with the lantern flames and waiting a few minutes, I got responses. Both responses detailing the best times for them to have a meeting. I chose a time and sent them the time of the meeting.
Moving to the dining room just as Cadance placed a plate of pancakes and fruit in front of Twily and setting my morning protein and gravy biscuits. “You doing a little better, Twily?” I asked, taking my seat as Cadance retrieved her breakfast and took a seat next to me at the table.
“Yeah, a little. Sorry for getting you scared?” She apologized.
“It’s okay, LSBFF.” I said, using the funny acronym system we had between each other. “I’m already working on speaking with your doctor and Luna about how this day came to be, and how to keep you from freaking out or misplacing time.”
“I’m starting to think that until we have actual children, this is going to be the closest we’ll get to caring for a child.” Cadance joked.
“Hey!” Twilight shot at her, acting upset. This got us all to laugh a bit and lighten up the morning for all of us.
(Couple Hours Later)
The Doctor arrived at my place just as Luna’s chariot landed in the street in front of my house. “Doctor Clinician, Princess Luna, do come in. Cadance is barely finishing up making some tea and I’ve got some snack sized sandwiches left from my housewarming party a few days ago.” I called out to them, and holding the door open for the two ponies. Once they were in and was served tea, the doctor got right to business.
“So, you messaged us about an incident where Twilight was harrassed for some tickets to the Grand Galloping Gala?” He asked. “Forgive me if I sound insensitive, but that shouldn’t be that big of a deal.”
“Well, knowing my sister, she probably was starting to get pressured to give it to someone, causing her mind to make a mountain out of a molehill, and she briefly lost her sense of reality.” I commented. “So, there is no offence towards me about Twilight.”
“And I think I’m partially to blame for what happened.” Luna admitted, getting mine and Clinician’s attention. “I found a “friendship curriculum” from Daybreaker’s former study and I decided to try it with Twilight, as it seemed designed for her...only remembering who made the curriculum after I sent the two tickets. I rectified that a few hours after you messaged me.”
I looked between her and Clinician. “That’s one way to do things, but I think it’s best if we go over Daybreaker’s curriculum and revise them so they don’t provoke her in the wrong ways.” I suggested.
“It would probably would be for the best.” Luna and Clinician agreed. Luna then summoned the book with it’s insane curriculum and we began to look through it.
Author's Note
took me a bit to figure this out.

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               Chapter 10: Pride vs Reality                
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Chapter 10: Pride vs Reality
(Ponyville Town Market)
Ponyville is such an enigma that even official Agriculture people have a hard time explaining. While there are only a total of maybe three farms (not including the Apple Orchard of Sweet Apple Acres), each was attended to by two ponies and the fields of said farms...well, each farm had only one field and each field was barely an acre in size. Despite that, and again, not including the primary produce of Sweet Apple Acres, the town always had more than enough to eat every day...and no food, except really rare or expensive food items are imported from out of town.
This is rather important because there are some days that I have cleared out the entire market of all produce (not including apples), and only a few hours later and it’s completely restocked. It’s really puzzling to those who actually have a knowledge of where food comes from...and I mean it. Several idiot nobles back in Canterlot had the thought that the shopkeepers and restaurant owners had a designated unicorn conjuring the food from thin air and thought that ponies that ate food from Earth Pony farm towns are just as filthy as they are...if only they knew.
And the entire point of this was a bit of a Pride problem that happen shortly after one of those ‘cleared market’ moments. I had just barely finished putting the large stock of food away when I started feeling the ground shake. Taking a peek outside, there was a giant cloud of dust and dirt coming towards town.
“Stampede!” A nearby pegasus shouted. The town erupted into chaos at that warning. Ponies either took shelter indoors (like anyone should) or began literally running around in circles like chickens with their heads chopped off (dang it, Daybreaker. Why did you have to try to make life so “perfect” that ponies don’t know how to handle danger properly?). I immediately summoned my Auxiliary armor, sent up a magic flare to alert my squad and began running towards said stampede.
I arrived at the eastern bridge out of town, meeting my squad at it. “Cap! What’s the plan?” Flash asked for the group. I looked at the rampaging cows and back at the town while thinking. I suddenly heard a gleeful yell coming from off to the side of the stampede. In that location was one of Twilight’s friends, Applejack, accompanied by a Border Collie dog or Austrailian Shepherd dog...I kept getting those species mixed up.
“Form a small perimeter on this side of town, and we’ll let the cowgirl do her thing.” I said. The squad followed my orders and we watched as Applejack managed to herd the stampede into a different direction and managing to stop them and question their reasons for stampeding. After she finished talking with them, she and her dog ran off to Sweet Apple Acres. As she left, most of the townsponies left cover and began to cheer as she left. I dismissed the squad and went home as I overheard some ponies speaking about throwing an award ceremony for her.
Looks like we’re coming upon the Apple’s Applebuck Season. May Faust help us all.
(One week later)
Well, the time had come for me to get ready for action to help Applejack. From the insane lesson plans, Luna and I learned that Celestia pretty much had every little detail of what would happen for those lessons, all the way down to who says what and when. So, looking at what today was going to be, I needed to be ready to keep the chaos Applejack unintentionally makes under control, or not happen at all.
Anyway, the town had set up an Appreciation Party (or as Pinkie Pie called it, a Hero Party), and Twilight went up to the podium to deliver a speech. However, the constant interruptions from some of her other friends and the mayor got her to toss her misused cue cards all over the stage. The mayor then introduced Applejack...who turned out to be late, tired, and slightly delirious. After a little ‘whoo’ session after she saw her distorted reflection in the trophy she received from the town, she dragged it home and Twilight, her friends (minus Applejack), and I came together.
Twilight looked at Applejack and then turned to us. “Was it just me, or did Applejack seem a little-”
“Tired?” Rainbow suggested.
“Dizzy?” Fluttershy pointed.
“Messy?” Rarity said, getting everyone but me to look at her with confusion. “Well, did you see her mane?”
“She seemed fine to me.” Pinkie said, oblivious to Applejack’s fatigue. She then started hopping around and making the sound of an ambulance siren.
“Twilight, see about getting Pinkie under control while I go talk to Applejack.” I told her as I began walking to Sweet Apple Acres. A couple minutes pass and arriving at Sweet Apple Acres, Applejack was unloading a cart of apples while her older brother, Big Mac was attempting to talk to her about something. After she finished unloading while ignoring her brother, she walked off into the orchard.
I approached the fuming red earth pony as he started carefully moving the apples into barrels. “Hey there Mac.” I said as I came close, getting his attention. “Is Applejack trying to do all the harvesting to try to compensate for you getting injured?”
“Eeyup.”
“I take it that she has been skipping meals and sleep to keep working?”
“Eeyup.”
“Does she have other things scheduled during the next few days?”
“Eeyup.”
“And you haven’t been able to talk her down or even get her to eat or sleep?”
“Nnope.”
“Do I have permission to talk to her and, if needed, detain her to get her to eat and rest?”
“Eeyup.”
I nodded and entered the orchard, keeping an eye out for Applejack. It took me only a few seconds because I nearly ended up bumping into her as she was asleep standing up. Only a few meters away from where she entered. Shaking my head, I unhitched her from the cart and carefully carried her to their farm house. The grandmother of the family, Granny Smith, saw me entering with Applejack in my arms and nodded to me and gestured upstairs. After getting her tucked in to her bed and got back downstairs, Granny stopped me. “Thank you for getting her back inside to rest at least. I started getting worried sick about her when she passed day two without food, nor rest.”
“She was asleep when I found her. Also, mostly classified info you should know, Celestia expected something like this to happen and was also expecting her to create accidental chaos around town without being fully aware of it. Something about the ‘Curse all Earth ponies share’?” I shared with her.
Granny shook her head in frustration. “All the better that she is at a funny farm and not on the throne now.” She said. “Taking advantage of the natural stubbornness and pride of our tribe to further her own goals. I’ll be having words with Applejack about this.” She then walked into the kitchen and came back with a stack of fresh apple pies. “And here. Some pies for you, your wife, and Applejack’s friends.”
“Thank you, I’ll pass these along.” I told her. “Heck, I’ll see if Twily and my wife are willing to help in the orchard and I’ll be there as well.”
“Eeyup.” Big Mac said, walking in from outside.
I nodded and left, eating one of the pies as I walked back into town. I made a stop at my sister’s place just as she and her other friends began to leave the tree. I gave them their pies (Rainbow politely declined it...more for me), and told them about Applejack’s self imposed exhaustion and hunger to do some apple harvesting. Twilight figured as much and talked her friends into going to help. I gave her the go ahead while I told Cadance and got her on board with helping Applejack (to which Cadance agreed and came with me to help).
Upon arrival, Applejack was tied to the porch and was receiving an earful from Granny as she and Big Mac tried feeding her a few apple fritters. Meanwhile, Twilight and her friends gathered the tools and carts they needed and entered the orchard to begin harvesting. Cadance followed them into the orchard while I approached the house, hearing the back end of what Granny was saying. That, however, was drowned out by Applejack yelling when she saw me approaching.
“Why you no good, rotten, lazy, fat, unicorn supremist!” She bellowed, almost giving her grandmother and brother a heart attack with how loud she was. “Trying to take away good and honest jobs from us Earth Ponies!? I ain’t gonna let that happen!” She broke out of her bonds and charged me. I quickly cast an Armor Flesh spell just as she pivoted herself to buck my belly...but the buck only bounced off, sending her tumbling forward. As she laid on the ground, dazed, I kneeled down and gave her a strong flick to the forehead, which instantly knocked her out due to her exhaustion and hunger.
I picked her up and brought her back inside, then pulled out a piece of parchment and wrote a small message to Dr. Clinician before burning it with a dragonfire match. Exiting the house, I looked to Granny and Mac. “She’ll be okay. Dr. Clinician will be here shortly and should help her get back to normal, both physically and mentally.” I told them. I then walked into the orchard and began helping in the harvest.
(After the harvest and Doctor visit)
Cadance and I were sitting down to enjoy dinner when someone knocked on the door. I placed a heat shield spell over the top of the food and answered the door. Standing just outside was Applejack without her hat, and Big Mac. I gave Cadance a slightly concerned look and then stepped outside to talk with the two Apples. Applejack had a look of remorse while Big Mac gave her a stern look. “While don’t like how you had to get me to rest and eat, I’m both mighty grateful and mighty sorry. I didn’t mean what I said while I was tired and hungry. I hope that you can forgive me.”
“I already have.” I told her, surprising both Apples. “I have a tendency to consider the circumstances behind actions and words. I knew you were tired and delirious, so you wouldn’t have been thinking straight. For now, take some time and get rested up and fed.” Applejack nodded and left. Big Mac followed after giving me a grateful smile and a nod in appreciation.
One insane day down, many more to go.
Author's Note
Took me a while to get this done. had to catch up on some reading.

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               Chapter 11: Griffon Conflict                
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Chapter 11: Griffon Conflict
(Two days after last chapter)
Aside from Earth Ponies, Griffons are the most stubborn of species...and I say that as respectfully as possible, with no offence towards Gregory (even if it is true). His cousin, on the other hand…
Well, to start this little crazy time, a not so crazy thing happened just after the next day after Applejack apologised. Greg informed the squad about his cousin coming over to visit...just before all of us got pranked by Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie. And I’m not gonna bring up what they did. All I’m gonna say is that was both embarrassing and in good fun.
Anyway, the entire squad had prepared for her arrival...only she didn’t arrive when and where she said she would. Heck, we didn’t know where she was until we found Pinkie Pie amongst the wreckage of a hoof powered helicopter.
“Miss Pie!” Greg exclaimed as he dug her out of the wreckage, miraculously unharmed. “Are you okay? What happened?”
“That Gilda Griffon nearly killed me! That’s what!” She exclaimed back, grabbing and shaking Greg until his feathers were all askew. She then looked at the helicopter wreckage. “She also ruined my ‘Wheelie-copter’. I had to work overtime for a whole week to pay for that!”
“You want to press charges?” Flash asked, pulling Greg out of her grip.
“I’ll take a raincheck on that.” She said, putting on an umbrella hat. “Gilda is Dashie’s friend after all, so she might be seeing something in her that I’m not.”
“Which will be difficult for both you and us to see.” Greg said, having taken a moment to preen most of his feathers back into place. “I’ve known Gilda ever since we were chicks...and it’s a term for the stage of youth before cub.” He quickly shot off at me, preventing me from teasing him. “Anyway, she was a bit of a delinquent back in Griffonia, causing problem after problem. She was sent to Equestria by my aunts to attend a flight school there. When she came back, she seemed to have shaped up quite a bit...and she then spiraled back into her old ways.”
“In that case, Pinkie and Squad! Atten-Hutt!” The squad and Pinkie suddenly stood at attention. “We are all witness to a griffin by the name of Gilda having made an attempted murder of Miss Pie and the destruction of her property. While she isn’t going to press charges...yet, it will be all our jobs to keep an eye out and on her to gather evidence against her. If she is committing a crime, keep on the down low and wait until she is out of view before questioning the witnesses...except you Pinkie. I have a different assignment for you.”
“Sir, Yes Sir!” She exclaimed in attention.
“I need you to keep an eye on Rainbow Dash...and don’t let her notice you are nearby!” I emphasised to her. She nodded and then pulled out what looked like a pink jawbreaker. She threw it on the ground and a puff of smoke later, she was gone.
“That pony is a mystery.” Midnight said, shivering a bit.
“The understatement of the century, right there.” I responded. “Anyway, you have your assignment, get going. I’m going to check on the Portal Base construction while you take care of that.”
(Portal Base construction site)
The Portal was active in the midst of the chaos that makes up construction. At the very least, the portal room was built first so that the other side wasn’t having to contend with the noise and most of the dust that came with construction.
Upon arrival at the job site, I was actually impressed, as the frames were up and some of the cement, stone, and insulation work was up and progressing well. The worst that the crew had to deal with in terms of delays was the occasional wandering Timberwolf. However, things just decided to get bad as soon as we (the forepony and I) passed near the portal room.
“Hey, Dweeb, I don’t care if you say I’m not allowed through.” We heard through the door, and we assume the portal. “I’m going through whether you like it or-” *POW!!* The door to the room shot open and a feathery mass flew past my face, taking a small chunk of my mane with it.
“And stay out!” A guard from the other side of the portal said, stickin his head in before pulling back into his side. Looking to where the feathery mass flew to, there lay Gilda (or I at least assumed it was her), greatly dazed from the otherworld guard punching her lights out.
She quickly shook herself back to normal and shouted back at the guard. “Up yours too, Dweeb!” I cleared my throat, getting her attention. She seemed to wilt in fear and realization when she saw me and most of the construction crew surrounding her. She immediately tried to fly off, but I quickly summoned some griffon wing restraints and caught her, causing her to fall into some freshly poured cement.
I pulled her out of the cement and handed a bag of bits to the nearby workers, mouthing an ‘I’m sorry’ to them. “Gilda Griffon, you are under arrest for attempted ponyslaughter, destruction of property, and trespassing on Government and Interdimensional properties.” I said. “You have the right to remain silent, and anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. Do you understand that?”
“Eat my talons!” She yelled in response, jumping out of my grip and tried to claw my face. Thankfully, her cement bath placed a buffer between her claws and my face, causing her to only bruise me at worst. After she did do so, a handful of construction workers tackled her to the ground.
“Add assaulting a member of the Equestrian Military/standing police officer, and you are in big trouble.” I placed a sleeping spell over her and picked her up from under the pony pile. “Back to work gentlemen. I’ll take this one back to town.” They picked themselves up and did just that as I walked towards town.
(Town Hall, few hours later)
“I can’t believe you arrested one of my fillyhood friends!” Rainbow shouted at me and my squad as we stood between her and the way to the basement of Town Hall (where the jail cells were).
“We told you what she is charged with, we have witness statements, what more do you need to point out that she is far from innocent?” Greg asked, rather frustrated at the hardheaded and blind loyalty this pegasus had.
“Well, for one thing, explain how she could have done all that you said you did when I was with her the entire time! Huh!? Care to explain?!” She yelled back.
Before anyone could respond to her, Pinkie popped out of a nearby potted plant and stood in front of her with a stern look. “Dashie, you weren’t with her the entire time, and even in some of the point where you were, she did her crimes when you weren’t looking.” She stated seriously.
“I...wha...were you following me the entire day Pinkie?!” Rainbow asked, fuming and annoyed.
“Yup, and I have to say, the time she nearly killed me and broke my ‘Wheelie-copter’ was when she asked you to do a stunt after I showed up on said ‘Wheelie-copter’.” She said. “And you were busy with some weather stuff around the time that she was caught in the Portal Fort place that’s still under construction.” She said, with a slight hint of ‘try beating that’ tone in her voice.
Rainbow could only flop onto the ground with a sigh of resignation. “I just have a hard time believing that she actually committed those crimes. She wasn’t like that during flight school.” She said while starting to cry a bit.
“I don’t mean to sound mean, but I can say that her time in flight school changed her...for at least a few weeks.” Greg said. “She’s my cousin, and she grew up in a bad neighborhood and her parents tried to put her in a place where she could change, but it didn’t last long. Just be happy that she changed for as long as she was.”
Rainbow nodded and pulled out a bag of bits. “I’m not sure if this will pay for her crimes, but at least let her go and send her back to Griffonia.”
I took the bag of bits and then nodded to Greg, who pulled out a key and walked into the basement. “We’ll see to it that she is given enough amnesty to be free as a bird...no pun intended. But if she messes up again, she’s either back in jail or off to Griffonia.” I told her.
A loud squawk and breaking glass was heard from the basement, then Greg hurried up from the basement with a gash on his cheek. “She slashed me with shiv and bolted out of one of the basement windows!” He exclaimed.
“Titan, get Greg to the hospital so he can get stitched up.” I told the minotaur. “Midnight, send a message to the main command that Gilda Griffon is to be captured at best or killed at worst...if she is still in Equestria.” She nodded and both her and Titan began their assigned tasks. “And I’m sorry, Rainbow, she has made herself a fugitive.”
“It’s okay. I shouldn’t have thought that she didn’t change over the years.” She said, still crying a bit.
“It doesn’t make it any easier though.” I said, kneeling down and giving her a one-armed hug.
To think that Daybreaker would have allowed something like this to happen to one of the Bearers if she still was in power.
Author's Note
I know MLP is a cartoon, but there at least needs to be one fanfiction that has a serious look at laws and common sense...should be called uncommon sense with how the world seems to be going.

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               Chapter 12: Boast Befrienders               
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Chapter 12: Boast Befrienders
(One week after Gilda fled)
There are some perks to living in some of the bigger cities in Equestria, and that’s access to some quality entertainment on an almost daily basis. This brings about what concerns me and Cadance on this particular day.
“I hate being bored.” I complained while trying to avoid sounding like a whining brat.
“You’re not the only one.” Cadance said as she took a seat next to me on our porch with a pair of drink glasses. “Lemonade?” She asked, offering a glass to me.
“Sure.” I took the glass and sipped on the drink. “Despite being bored, I have to admit that Ponyville has a type of peaceful aura to it. True, the stampede last week came and ruined it...for about half an hour.. The peace was back almost instantly when the stampede was stopped.”
“And Daybreaker, before as Celestia, commissioned some Earth Ponies to build this town.” Cadance said. “Probably one of the few things she did right in her insanity.”
I nodded in agreement and took another sip of my drink. I paused when my ears picked up the sound of a crowd gathering and what sounded like the start of a live show. “Cadance, I think some entertainment just arrived in town...and if I’m recalling what Daybreaker wrote about the plan for that specific day, I’ll need to see about doing damage control.” I told her as I stood up. “Can you inform the squad to be on high alert for an Ursa Minor after dark? I’ll meet you at the show.” She nodded and walked off to inform the squad while I went to the edge of town where the crowd was gathering.
By the time I had arrived, the show had started and some of Twilight’s friends were ridiculing the ‘magician’ on the stage. I won’t go into the specifics, but if you’ve seen the show, then you know how Twilight’s friends reacted and were embarrassed by the “Great and Powerful” Trixie. Good thing I was there, as I kept her friends from attempting to pressure Twilight into trying to “show up” Trixie.
“Girls, I know your hearts are in the right place, but first off, while she may or may not be lying or showing off, it’s her job to do so.” I scolded them after the show had ended. “She needs to draw in crowds, so that kind of behavior is to be expected.”
“It don’t mean we like it.” Applejack retorted.
“No one said you had to. I don’t criticise you for how you do your apple trees, so please don’t criticise anyone for how they do their own thing.” I told her.
“Well, I ain’t gonna believe her feats unless I see them myself.” She said, walking off to Sweet Apple Acres. The rest of Twilight’s friends left as well.
“I’m sorry, BBBFF.” Twilight said, coming out from where she was hiding from her friend’s pressure. “I didn’t think they would act like that.”
“It’s okay, LSBFF.” I told her, kneeling down and hugging her. “Your friends are just ignorant at times...and I'm not saying you aren’t either.”
“You big lug.” Cadance said, walking over from where she was watching the show. “As mean as that was, you said it in the best way a sibling can.” She hugged us both, then she stood up suddenly with a bright face. “Hey, why don’t we invite Trixie over for dinner.” She suggested.
“That actually sounds like a good idea.” Both Twilight and I said at the same time. We both laughed at our sudden synchronization before I continued to speak for both of us.
“It has been a bit of an unspoken tradition that people of the private entertainment industry are to eat dinner with the local royals .” I explained. “Which, in this case, is you and I, so I can head over to her and get her invited, while you and Twily can get started on cooking...if you don’t mind, that is.”
“I don’t mind.” She said, planting a kiss on my cheek. “Now hurry and get Trixie invited to dinner. I’ll be making some haysagna and lasagna.”
“You really know how to make my day, don’t you honey?” I said, kissing her back. “I should be back between a few minutes to maybe an hour.” I started heading to the wagon Trixie came in.
(Trixie’s Wagon)
It only took me a minute to get to her wagon. Upon arrival, I saw the two most idiotic colts, Snips and Snails, fanboying over Trixie and begging her to tell them how she defeated an Ursa Major. Trixie didn’t answer them, and just danced around the questions and begging until she asked them to leave and let her rest. When they were gone, she sighed in relief. “Thank the Goddess. I can only take so much of crazy fans.”
“Even if there are only two and their both idiots?” I asked as I approached, getting her attention.
She quickly composed herself. “What can the Great and Powerful Trixie do for you, sir?”
“Three things, actually.” I said. “First, you can drop the act, it’s just you and me right now. You have no real need to keep the act up constantly. Second, my wife, sister, and I are having some haysagna for dinner tonight and we wanted to invite you over to eat with us.”
Trixie looked at me confused. “You want to invite me over for dinner?” I nodded to her question. “No one’s ever done that before for me. And I heard you say ‘three things’. What is the third thing?”
“Are you coming to dinner?” She nodded. “Well, the third think is to allow me to place a shield spell over your wagon.” I said, placing said shield spell.
“Why would you need to have a shield spell over my wagon?” Trixie asked in confusion.
“When I said those two colts were idiots, I mean they are idiots.” I said, with a serious look on my face. “They’re badgering of you comes before they idiotically awaken an Ursa Minor from it’s nap...and they would have thought the creature was an Ursa Major. All in the hopes of you banishing or vanquishing it.”
Trixie’s eyes widened in shock. “Those two idiots!” She quietly yelled. “They should know better!”
“And they don’t.” I told her, stopping her rant. “I’ve got my squad on high alert, and they should be able to lure it away from town and back into the Everfree.”
“Your squad?” She questioned.
“I’m a captain of a squad in the Equestrian Military, the Auxiliaries specifically.” I told her, standing at attention. “Surprised?”
“I am, but I won’t question it.” She answered. “It doesn’t make sense why they would allow a tubby unicorn...thing like you in, but they might have reasons that I don’t know about.”
“True that.” My stomach took that moment to rumble. “And I think we’ve stood out here long enough. Let’s head over to my place.” I started walking, Trixie following close behind.
The rest of the night went well. Even with the ground shaking and the Ursa Minor roaring outside. Trixie’s wagon survived the night, both Snips and Snails were placed with six months of community service for what they did, heck, Twilight became good friends with Trixie, to the point that Twilight taught Trixie a few more tricks and Trixie promised to stop in town every so often.
Happiness all around that night.
Author's Note
This chapter is a little more rough than the rest.

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                 Chapter 13: More Portals                  
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Chapter 13: More Portals
(Early Morning, Portal Base)
My day started earlier than normal, as I had been called to the Portal Base to investigate something that the portal was doing.
“I came by to do the morning cleaning around the portal and I saw one of the frame stones a little askew and the portal was flashing a blue and orange color.” The Forepony said, leading me into the portal room and I was given the privilege to see the portal in it’s chaotic state.
“Did last night’s cleaning crew see anything?” I asked, concern lacing my voice.
“One of the cleaners actually admitted that he jostled the frame while he wasn’t paying attention.” The forepony told me as I looked at the disturbed frame stone.
“Give him a different task to handle from now on. I don’t know what will happen with this, so I’m going to try to fix it.” I told him. He nodded and left to do as told while I lit my horn up with magic...
(TSR Universe, Third POV)
In the meadow behind the Castle of Friendship, two stallions were working on a little project. The larger pony was a sapphire blue alicorn with a black mane streaked with dark blue and soft sunset orange swept back aside from a few bangs overhanging his turquoise eyes, he had a scar starting from the lower left of his barrel going up his chest to right shoulder, his wings were sharp and streamlined, clearly built for speed, and he had a long leonine tail. His cutie-mark was a pale white-blue crescent moon facing upwards with a five-point star surrounded by five white twinkles.
The stallion before him was a unicorn pony with a dark orange mane with softer highlights, a coat of golden orange aside from the off-white stocking marks on his legs, as well as the blaze going down his face, he had a slightly unkempt appearance, including his beard and glasses which kept becoming askew, he wore a dark bluish-green coat covered with lighter stars and moons held together by a clasp that resembled his cutie-mark, a sparkling sun casting rays.
The alicorn was Prince Midnight Blaze and the unicorn his student, Sunburst.
“Now focus, Sunburst, I know you can do this,” Midnight assured, “Our training sessions thus far have shown you have more magical power than you’ve given yourself credit for.”
“I’m… just not entirely sure, Midnight,” Sunburst hesitated, “Teleportation is among the more difficult magical techniques to learn, and I’ve never even performed one conjuration!”
“Look, I understand you’re nervous, Sunburst,” Midnight gently patted his student on the withers, “and though I’ve taught you a fair amount of Mana Manipulation techniques, I can see why since what I’ve been teaching you differs from traditional unicorn spellcasting.
“But trust me! I’m impressed at how much you’ve learned and how quickly you’ve mastered what I’ve taught you thus far. It’s different, yes, but the foundation beneath both studies is basically the same. You have the magical power inside you that equates the potential to master teleportation, you only need the will.”
Sunburst’s downcasted look finally turned up to the eyes of his mentor, and he felt a little better to see the faith Midnight had in him.
If Midnight believes in me, then how can’t I believe in myself? He thought before taking a deep breath.
“Alright, I’m ready.”
“Good, you know the process, now all you have to do muster the power,” Midnight instructed, “Remember, patience yields focus.”
“Alright, here we go…” Sunburst concentrated and his magic began to light up his horn...
(Back with Shining, His POV)
As soon as the stone was back in place, the portal started swirling normally for a few seconds. It then started swirling more violently and changed to an orange color. I began to feel a slight pull from the portal, and without hesitation, I closed the Portal room door, pulled out one of my collapsable weapons and stabbed it into the ground, anchoring me to the ground. After a few minutes of an intensifying pull, the portal started to blow at me and I undid my anchor and moved as close to the portal as the cosmic wind would allow.
“This can only end so well.” I muttered to myself...
(TSR, Third POV)
“AAAAAUUUUUUGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!” Sunburst screamed as the magic around his horn crackled and fizzed and popped with energy resembling sparks of electricity.
“Hold on, Sunburst!!” Midnight had no idea what was going on but he knew this wasn’t Sunburst’s doing.
Something else was at work here, and he lit up his horn with a counter-spell to undo whatever mystic force had his student in its grasp. He reached out with his will, his mana clashing with the energy ensnaring Sunburst’s magic, and he gritted his teeth in pain as he felt ripples of agony through his whole body!
Instead of dispelling the magic, like he’d intended, something unexpected happened in a burst of power! Before the two ponies opened a rift of prismatic energy, releasing Sunburst and Midnight from its power as the two stallions dropped in exhaustion… leaving them unable to fight against the pull they felt as the rift sucked them towards it!
“AUGH! Midnight! It’s- It’s pulling us in!” Sunburst began to panic.
“Fight it, Sunburst!” Midnight yelled back, “There’s no telling what will happen to us!”
“I’m trying…!!!!” Sunburst wailed, but it was a losing battle for both of them.
Though they dug their hooves into the ground and hunched downwards, doing their best to stay rooted, the pull from the rift would not be denied. When they were only a couple yards away, they felt the pull lift them off the ground and they screamed as they were hurtled into the unknown...
(Shining’s World, Third POV)
Which just so happened to be headfirst into Shining Armor’s gut, knocking him down onto his butt and the wind out of his lungs. A few seconds after the impact, the portal shut down and Shining was left, struggling to breathe and with two anthro stallions laying on the ground in front of him.
“Ugh...Goddess above! I knew I should have cast an Armor Flesh spell before getting close,” he groaned while rubbing his sore tummy. He then looked down at the two stallions and saw that, other than the loose robe-like toga that the smaller pony wore, both were buck naked.
“Uh… you guys okay?” he asked them as he pulled off his large jacket and placed it near the larger pony.
The larger pony groaned as he sat up, and Shining was stunned to see this blue pony was an alicorn! The alicorn muttered, “Ohh… what’d we hit, a brick wall?”
“Heh-heh, I have been told I have an iron stomach.”
The alicorn’s eyes started to flitter open as his vision slowly cleared up, “Shining…? Is that you?”
“Umm...yeah? How do you know my name?” Shining asked, placing a hand on one of his hidden collapsible weapons, ready to draw it out at a moment’s notice.
“Shining, what’re you talking about? You’re my best friend and my brother-in-la…!!!” The alicorn’s turquoise eyes widened in shock as he finally saw clearly and looked up at the pony with Shining Armor’s face…
Except the Shining Armor before him was… different.
He stood up on his hind legs, wore trousers of some kind, his front limbs had what could only be hands instead of hooves.
And he was fat.
Like, real fat! Not disgustingly, unappealing slob-sort of fat. The Shining Armor before him, despite his mighty mass also boasted a powerful bod! His chest, his arms, rippling in muscle in a way that complemented the bodacious belly he sported.
“Shining?! You… you look… Wow!” the alicorn pointed without even realizing it… until he saw the fingers at the end of his limb.
“Wait… What the- What happened to my hooves?! Wha- What happened to my body?!”
“Midnight…?” The smaller stallion was waking up and sat up as he removed a pair of round-rimmed glasses and with his magic and used hsi toga to wipe the lenses.
“I’ll take the first bit you said as a compliment,” Shining spoke up, relaxing a little but staying on his guard.
“The second bit, as far as I can tell, it must be a little clash between the magic of the portal and my telekinesis spell I was using. And Midnight? I know a Midnight, but she is a bat pony, not an alicorn.”
“Prince Shining Armor?” the smaller stallion asked as he put his glasses on and went, “WHOA! Uh, Sir, you… put a little weight? Wait, what’re these things?! What happened to my hooves?!”
“Uh, I think these are hands, Sunburst,” answered Midnight somewhat tensely, “and… I have no idea what just happened either. Shining Armor just mentioned a portal and-and a telekinesis spell? A bat- Wait, Shining Armor never calls them bat ponies! They’re called lunar pegasi!”
“Maybe in your world, that’s their designated species or whatever. But here they are bat ponies,” Shining responded while folding his beefy arms.
“Our worl- !!!” Midnight paused in dawning realization…
…
…
Before he gasped and yelled, “WE’RE IN ANOTHER UNIVERSE!!!”
“WHAT?!” Sunburst gaped in utter disbelieving shock at his mentor and at Shining Armor and back and forth multiple times before uttering, “That’s… impossible!!”
“Not if some kind of portal was involved,” Midnight corrected as he hesitantly began to stand, feeling a little wobbly as he balanced on his legs and noticed his hooves were cloven.
Thankfully, his wings and tail helped balance him out and once he was standing straight, he looked to Shining Armor and realized, He’s not my Shining Armor. Not my brother-in-law, my best friend…
The thought was a little depressing, but Midnight got himself together and cleared his throat, “Uh- Shining Armor? I… I’m not quite sure how else to say this, so I’ll be blunt. Sunburst here and I? We’re from another universe, another Equestria. But somehow, I think we got pulled into this Equestria and… now I don’t know what to do or what to say.”
Shining gave Midnight a slight glare before speaking.
“First off, I already established the fact that you are from another universe, or world. Second, the you-getting-pulled into this Equestria was an accident. A cleaner accidentally jostled this portal frame and I was making sure it wasn’t broken,” he said, pointing to the stone archway with odd runes on the main stones. “From there, the cosmos must have had the stars aligned at the wrong time, causing you to appear here while you must have done something on your end.”
“Well… Midnight was teaching me to teleport,” Sunburst raised a nervous hand.
“That could be it,” Midnight pointed to Sunburst before rubbing his chin in thought, “Teleportation involves time and space, so… when Shining Armor was trying to fix his portal frame, the cosmic whatever linked the frame to Sunburst’s attempt at teleportation, creating the rift that sucked us in and dropped us here!”
“I’m starting to think that teleportation should be more closely monitored and more carefully taught,” Shining commented, lightly facepalming. “A poor attempt at teleporting killed me at age four before I was miraculously revived by Faust and this...cosmic being known as the Merchant. Heck, memories blend together, but my soul wasn’t even part of this body, if I recall correctly.”
Sunburst sulked, feeling guilty, so Midnight stepped in, “Now, hold on, Shining, give him a break! It was his first time and none of us had any idea this would happen- Wait… you died and got resurrected by Faust?!”
Shining Armor gave Midnight a flat look for three long seconds before Midnight pinched the bridge of his muzzle and muttered, “Never mind, I don’t wanna know.”
“Good idea, don’t want to melt your brain in the first hour of you being here,” Shining picked up his oversized jacket and handed it to Midnight. “Speaking of being here, I’ll need to get you some clothing, and much more appropriate attire for Sun Spot over there.” He pointed to Sunburst as he struggled to stand up while in his toga-robe.
Midnight helped Sunburst upright before responding, “Please, you’re not the only one who’s died and been brought back to life. Only in my case, Celestia cast a spell on me to make sure I’d reincarnate. Second, what do you mean clothing? Hardly anypony wears clothes unless you’re some stuck-up Canterlot snob.”
“If you wanna walk around with your dingdongs dangling out, that’s up to you,” Shining Armor shrugged, causing Sunburst to yelp and blush as he suddenly reached down and covered his barely-concealed stallion bits.
“Well, now that you mention it…” Midnight looked down and saw his pecker starting to poke out of its sheath as he blushed while avoiding looking at Shining Armor’s… appealing body.
“That’s probably a good idea.”
(Shining’s house in Ponyville)
“Honey, we’ve got a few extra guests!” Shining called out as he led Midnight and Sunburst into his house. “Two extra plates…” He paused and looked at Midnight, who gave him a nervous smile… “And make sure one of those plates has extra protein.”
“Protein?” echoed Sunburst.
“Oh you know,” Shining Armor waved his hand as if it were obvious, “meat?”
Sunburst gulped while Midnight raised a brow, “So you figured out I’m of Lunar Pony descent.”
Shining pointed at his mouth. “When you smiled, I saw your canines, or whatever you call them. In my past life, my father was a dentist that had a challenged scalp.”
Midnight and Sunburst shared a confused look while Shining Armor sighed, “Anyway, come meet my wife.”
He led the two stallions to the door of the kitchen and Princess Mi Amore Cadenza (Cadance) was standing there, bipedal as well.
“Cadance is bipedal too?” Midnight was surprised.
“You already know her name?” Shining Armor was confused.
“Well, I do know you in our universe and in our universe you’re also married to Cadance,” Midnight answered as he looked at this new Cadance before him.
Like her husband, she was bipedal, and she sported a lovely figure. She wasn’t thin or fat, but more of a slender and shapely form. She wore a soft yellow blouse and denim jeans that barely went past her supple behind.
“And unlike your world, we eloped…I’m not sure how much sooner than your happy couple got married but I’m happy with how things turned out for Shiny and me,” Cadance said while cracking a few extra eggs into the pan on the stove.
“Oh yeah, you’re definitely Cadance,” chuckled Midnight before giving it a thought, “and… truth be told, I think you made the right decision to elope.”
“Why do you say that?” asked Shining Armor.
“Two words: Changeling invasion,” Midnight answered dryly.
Shining Armor and Cadance shared a look before Cadance cleared her throat and gave a hospitable smile, “Well then, let’s get you both fed and clothed. Lunchtime will be ready momentarily, so Shiny, why don’t you give them something to wear for the moment? I’m sure they’d appreciate it.”
“I actually would,” Sunburst nodded thankfully while still holding his… hands over his stallion bits.
“I’d normally say it’s not a big deal, but…” Midnight blushed as he avoided looking at Shining Armor (which didn’t escape Cadance’s notice), “it’d probably make things more comfortable.”
“I’ll be right back with two of your bathrobes then,” Shining said to his wife, “Mine would probably make them look like they were wearing tents.”
He walked down the hall and opened a hallway closet as Cadance called up, “My biggest one for the alicorn, and one of the regular sized ones for the unicorn, please!”
She then turned to her guests and invited, “Please have a seat.”
They did so, and as they waited, Cadance peered around to give Midnight a smirk and teased, “Any particular reason you were avoiding the image of my husband’s godly physique, stranger?”
“Huh?! Wha- I ,uh… that is…” Midnight flabbergasted, trying to untie his tongue and get out the right words.
“Ha-ha, I’m just kidding with you,” Cadance waved it off, “It’s just, well… I am the Princess of Love, and I can sense certain feelings, such as attraction and infatuation. Yours are directed at Shining Armor.”
“Whoa, hold on a moment, Cadance!” Midnight raised his hands in surrender, “I assure you, I’m happily married, it’s just… Well, I’m bisexual.”
“Huh, no wonder you spent a lot of time with our Shining Armor back when we were in training under your dad,” Sunburst commented, earning him a slight stink eye from his mentor, causing him to shrink in his seat.
A muffled explosion was heard from the hall, causing the three of them to jump in startled shock.
“Dammit, Pinkie! Stop stashing your bucking party supplies in my house!!” Shining yelled from the hall.
Midnight and Sunburst shared an amused look as they had the same thought, Pinkie’s still Pinkie!
Shining entered the room holding two folded bathrobes.
“Yellow or Pink?” he asked the two stallions
“Which one’s the bigger one?” Midnight asked woefully and to his dismay, Shining Armor held out the pink one. Sighing he accepted it, turned around so they wouldn’t see his willy, and slipped the robe on while Sunburst did the same with the yellow robe.
It was before the robes went on that Cadance noticed Midnight had a fine musculature himself. He wasn’t the big and heavy sort like her husband, but rather a healthy figure with dedicated definition. Only the scar that started from his right shoulder and went down his chest, stopping at the opposite hip marred his studly physique yet in a complementary way.
Sunburst on the other hand, while thin and slender and had evidently worked on his chest and arms, he had just a slight bit of flab on his tummy, not to mention he was a whole head shorter than Midnight.
Once both stallions had secured the bathrobes, they sat back down as Shining Armor joined them (his chair creaking in mercy underneath him) and for a long awkward moment no one said anything while Cadance continued to cook.
Finally, Shining Armor broke the ice.
“So how do you guys know me in your world? What’s your version of me like?”
“Well… me and you? Or rather our world’s version of you,” Midnight started off, “we’ve been the best of friends since we were babies. You always looked out for me, like the big brother I never had. Then I became an alicorn and you were there for me in ways my own parents weren’t.
“My father put together a group of colts my age for me to lead, in order to learn about responsibility and leadership. Sunburst was a part of that group.”
“How’d that turn out?” asked Cadance as she levitated some of the food she’d prepared, along with a bottle of light apple cider.
Midnight and Sunburst shared a sad look before midnight admitted, “Not very well. Don’t get me wrong, we trained together in that group, we worked hard, we thought we were all gonna grow up to be a band of heroes to watch over Equestria like nopony’d ever seen!
“But then… a member of our group, a friend I loved like a brother,he and I were captured by perhaps the most despicable creature you’d ever met. She tortured me for information she thought I had even though I had no idea what she was talking about. Then she brought in our friend she’d captured along with me and said…”
Midnight clenched his hands, and Sunburst reached over to place a comforting hand on Midnight’s shoulder. He gave Sunburst an appreciative look before continuing, “She told me to talk or our friend would die. I begged her, pleaded with her, swore that I didn’t have the information she wanted. She didn’t believe me…”
Cadance and Shining Armor got the idea of what happened as Cadance went over and gave Midnight a comforting hug, which helped make him feel better.
“So then what happened?” asked Shining Armor in a solemn voice.
“I was so shocked and stunned with horror and grief, I couldn’t stop looking at his body, even when she was reaching for my throat with her claws,” Midnight recounted. “If you and my father hadn’t arrived, I… I wouldn’t be here.”
“Damn,” Shining sighed while holding his head. “I have no words for what I just heard.”
“Trauma aside, lunch is-” Cadance began, but was interrupted by the front door being slammed open by a familiar orange pegasus with a two-toned sapphire blue mane and tail.
“Captain Armor! We have a situation!” the pegasus shouted, getting Shining to stand up quickly.
“Flash, what is it?”
“The incident you told us to keep an ear out for is happening!” Flash yelled in a panic. “A more-than-likely fake message from Princess Luna instructed your sister to take her friends to deal with a sleeping dragon. I tried to stop her, but she almost literally acted like I wasn’t there to try!”
“...Flash?!”
All eyes turned to Midnight and Sunburst, the both of them gaping in utter shock at the guard who’d just burst in yelling. Their jaws hung, their pupils had shrunk to pinpricks… before they both keeled over.
“Uh… did I come at a bad time?” asked Flash.
“No time for that now.” Shining said, while heading towards the master bedroom. “Flash, get the squad ready to move out! Cadance, since Rarity isn’t available, I’m gonna need you to resize some of my clothing for these two to wear. I don’t personally like it, but you and these yahoos are gonna come with us to keep Twily from getting herself killed!”
(En Route to the Mountain of “Dragonshy”)
“Wake up, and stand at attention, you sorry pair of podunks!” Shining yelled at the two dressed, yet still unconscious stallions.
“Augh… five more minutes,” groaned Midnight irritably as he realized he was lying on a dirt road, and wearing some clothes. Looking down, he saw it was a purple sleeveless vest, rather similar to the one Shining Armor wore, along with a pair of baggy trousers.
“Ugh, did we just…?” Midnight turned to see Sunburst sitting up while rubbing his temple and saw he wore a somewhat worn shirt of cotton and brown shorts that only went down to his knees.
They gazed up at Shining Armor, who still looked like a mighty mountain to them, as he leered down at them somewhat impatiently.
“Uh… where’d these clothes come from and how did they get on us?” asked Midnight with a flat tone.
“Stand at attention and listen up first!” Shining responded in a bellow, causing the two stallions to scramble to their hooves in intimidation. “Now, my little sister Twilight Sparkle and her friends are roughly an hour ahead of us! She had received a false message from Princess Luna concerning the smoke in the sky above Ponyville and had been fooled to take care of a dragon that is causing it. Our task is to intercept her and her friends before they arrive at the mountain and then investigate the smoke and maybe fire once she is detained.”
“Wait, hold up- Detained?!” Midnight echoed in confusion.
“No questions until after!” Shining bellowed. “Until I’m done talking, you are to shut up and listen!”
“Okay, sorry!” Midnight rolled his eyes.
“No sass either!” He added with a rude poke to Midnight’s snoot. “To accomplish our mission, Gregory, Midnight Nebula, Flash Sentry, and Cadance! I need you four to fly ahead and catch up to them. Stop and detain them, no questions asked. If they resist, non-lethal force is authorized. As for Titan, myself and our two temporary squad mates, we will follow behind until we catch up. You All Understand My Orders!”
“Sir, Yes Sir!” Everyone but Cadance and the two other ponies shouted back.
“Then get your tails in gear! Go!” The assigned fliers took off towards the smoking mountain.
“You may now ask your question or questions, Midnight,” Shining said in a calmer tone.
“Okay… I’ll repeat: How’d we get these clothes on?” Midnight asked while fingering the vest.
“Also…” Sunburst raised a hesitant hand as he gazed after the fliers in the distance, “Was that really…?”
“...I take it Flash Sentry was the friend of yours who got killed,” Shining Armor gathered. When the two stallions nodded morosely, he sighed. “Probably better not to tell him that, much less that you know him in another world. As for your clothes, they’re mine, just magically resized to fit your smaller frames.”
Midnight and Sunburst shared a flat look before Sunburst asked, “These didn’t come out of your dirty clothes hamper, did they?”
“Just because I’m fat, it doesn’t mean I’m a slob,” Shining shot at him in a friendly way. “They’re freshly cleaned.”
“He asked not because of your weight, but because you’re a stallion,” Midnight clarified as he shrugged, “Lots of stallions forget to do laundry until they actually need clean clothes.”
“My apologies on jumping to conclusions. Anyway, I hope you either have some hidden weapons or, at least, weapons training,” Shining said, as he pulled out a small cylinder and it extended into a spear.
Midnight and Sunburst shared a curious look as the latter asked, “Do you think they’ll work in this world?”
“Won’t be sure till we try,” Midnight responded, and the two held out their hands and focused.
Appearing in each stallion’s hand was a sword. Sunburst’s sword had a soft-yellow blade, similar to the light of a sunset, while the crossguard and handle were colored the same as his toga-robe. Midnight’s sword had a blade as black as obsidian yet gave off a silvery glow like the full moon and the handle and guard were dark blue.
“Well, at least they appeared,” Midnight said in casual relief.
“Nice weapons,” Titan complimented to them. “Ancient Crystal Magic construction. Nearly unbreakable and can ‘form change’ into a weapon or weapon set that matches the owner’s personality.”
“Their base forms were originally crystal, but now they seem to be a literal part of us,” explained Midnight. “When we don’t need them, we absorb them into our bodies and conjure them at will. The magic involved isn’t Crystal Magic actually, but some kind of Harmonic energy we don’t fully understand. I don’t even know the full powers of my sword yet and Sunburst has yet to tap into his though he hasn’t had it for very long, to be fair.”
“I believe when Titan said that, he must have been saying that it had a resemblance to that,” Shining said, “He wouldn’t have known that it was based from Harmony Magic.”
“Oh Midnight didn’t mean to demean him or anything,” Sunburst assured a tad nervously, “he only meant to clarify the nature of our swords.”
“It just so happens, Shining, that our world’s version of you has one of these swords too,” added Midnight. “So, in a way, that makes you a Knight of Harmony!”
“Huh...I’ll ask about the technicalities of my honorary status later,” Shining said. “For now let’s get going.” He started walking down the road, leading the group.
“Now, I noticed something when Shining mentioned detaining his sister,” Titan commented, looking at Midnight with a slightly raised eyebrow. “Care to fill us in on your reaction?”
“Reaction?” echoed Midnight.
“You were confused about me detaining wanting to detain Twily,” Shining interjected, not looking at the rest of the group. “You looked like I was planning on arresting your wife.”
Midnight froze mid-step and uttered a very dumb, “Uh….”
“The Twilight where you are from is your wife, isn’t she?” Titan asked, not beating around the bush.
Shining Armor stopped as well, and ever so slowly turned his head to glare daggers at Midnight, who stood there, uncertain of what to do… until the sapphire alicorn forced a nervous smile and stupidly said, “Nice to meet you, big bro!”
Shining looked at him critically.
“Three questions. Do you love her?” Shining asked sternly.
“...More than anything,” Midnight answered solemnly, “I’ve time-traveled a thousand years, died and was reborn, lived a second childhood, underwent years of training, suffered loss and heartache, gave up much, protected Equestria from all manner of threats, all while holding onto the hope that I would tell her how much she means to me.”
He held up his wrist and a simple band appeared on it, made of silver, “She answered yes. We wed, and one day soon, we hope to have our own foals. Though, after seeing how you and Cadance were with your own, we decided to wait a little longer.”
“Question 2: Do you treat her like the Queen she should be treated like?”
“I treat her as the pony she is. A beautiful, intelligent, funny, loving, and amazing soul who deserves happiness but occasionally needs a little tough love to stay grounded when she allows her anxieties, her obsessive behaviors, and other flaws to get the better of her. I remind her of the kind of pony she is and help her remember what’s important, just as she does for me. I thank my lucky stars for the way she has faith in me and I endeavor every single day to be worthy of that faith.”
“Final Question: Was that ‘Big Bro’ pun intentional or not?” Shining asked with a smirk on his face.
“In more ways than one,” Midnight shrugged with a teasing look, “though I can honestly tell you, Shining Armor - I wouldn’t be the pony I am without you being the big brother I never had. I try to do the same for my own little brother, Twinken. You’d like him, he certainly likes you.”
Shining smiled and gave Midnight a hard pat on the back, accidentally knocking him onto the ground. “Good. I have nothing to worry about my interdimensional little sister then.”
“Oof… glad to hear,” Midnight groaned as he stood back up, still feeling that pat on the back. “Though you’re not the only one who calls her Twily, now.”
“I am both disturbed and intrigued…” muttered Sunburst as he observed this interaction.
“I just have only one rule for you to follow concerning my sister in this world: you don’t call her Twily,” Shining said. “If you bring your Twilight, then you may do so...only to her.”
“Fair enough,” Midnight responded… before holding his arms out.
“Wha- What’re you doing?” Shining Armor asked with a raised brow.
“C’mon, bring it in!” Midnight invited with a silly smile.
“...Okay,” Shining relented, moving forward and picked up Midnight up in a gentle, yet firm hug, popping Midnight’s back a bit as he hugged him.
Then he unceremoniously dropped Midnight and said, “Alright, enough dillydallying, we got a job to do. Move out!”
Dusting himself off, Midnight smiled as he looked on at his interdimensional brother-in-law.
So very different but at the same time exactly the same, he thought with a proud smile.
Author's Note
This chapter is done in collaboration with Wolven5 (https://www.fimfiction.net/user/100585/Wolven5) and his story MLP: The Story Retold (https://www.fimfiction.net/story/191317/mlp-the-story-retold).

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                 Chapter 14: More Problems                 
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Chapter 14: More Problems
(Base of Mt. Dragonshy)
The group of friends were making good time, having taken almost two hours to get close to the base of the smoking mountain. As they began to get close, something came to Sunburst’s mind concerning the portal.
“Uh, Midnight? Since we arrived in this world because of a faulty portal, does that mean we can’t use it to get back to our own Equestria?”
“I hope not,” answered Midnight, “if that portal doesn’t work, I’m not sure how else we’re gonna get home!”
“Best case scenario, the portal will be functioning when we get back to Ponyville, and we just need to recalibrate it for your world’s coordinates or whatever in the Multiverse,” Shining said. “Worst case scenario, the portal won’t connect to your world right off the bat and it’ll take a long time to fix it.”
“That, or we’re stuck in this Equestria forever,” added Midnight with a flat tone.
“The portal wasn’t just connected to your Equestria. If it can’t get you home, it can definitely get you to an Equestria with some different rules, but help all the same,” Shining commented. “And if that is the case, well, be ready to see three different Celestia’s walking around there.”
“Let’s just get this done with and hope for the best,” suggested Sunburst, and was answered by several murmurs of agreement.
“Sir, look up ahead!” Titan pointed to the ridge above them.
Shining looked up at the ridge and found two of the flight group circling above it while the other two were standing with Twilight and her friends there.
“Looks like we are halfway done. Let’s get up there and work from there. Double time.” Shining then took off at a brisk jog, his gargantuan gut bouncing with every step as the others followed closely.
Reaching the ridge, they found everyone present and accounted for though Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Rarity all looked terribly annoyed while Fluttershy was being cooperative and Pinkie Pie was laughing it up with Flash Sentry. Twilight however was lying unconscious.
“Any particular reason why my sister isn’t awake?” asked Shining Armor with a rise of his brow and tone.
Cadance stepped forward and explained, “She was behaving odd as soon as we got in front of them. She looked like she couldn’t see us, and was confused as to why her friends stopped when we showed up. More than likely a subtle hypnosis that Daybreaker may have placed on her just in case to try to preserve her idea of a ‘perfect’ future.”
Shining took a deep breath and stabbed the end of his spear into the ground. He then walked over to a nearby cliff face and punched it, causing the immediate area to shake like a one second earthquake hit, and caused a rock slide elsewhere.
Midnight whistled, impressed at this Shining Armor’s physical strength while Sunburst’s eyes widened and he stifled a whimper.
“Damnit, Daybreaker!” Shining shouted in rage. He took several deep breaths before turning to Gregory and Nebula. “Anything further to report?”
“I took a flight around the mountain to find a quick way up for the ground bound members of the squad and I also found out that most of the smoke isn’t coming from the cave at the top of the mountain, but also something burning a little ways away, just behind the mountain,” Gregory reported.
Shining nodded in understanding.
“Alright. Flight team, go up the mountain and investigate the smoke there and act as you feel is necessary,” he said. “Titan, Sunspot, I need you two to watch this group and make sure Twilight stays asleep. No unnecessary damage to her though,” Shining commanded. “As for you, Midnight, you and I are gonna investigate the other smoke sources. Everyone understand?”
Everyone nodded though Sunburst sighed, “My name is Sunburst, thank you very much.”
“It’s a nickname, get used to it,” Shining responded. “Alright let’s move out.”
The flight team took flight and Titan and Sunburst walked over to the gathered mares and started keeping watch. Shining began walking with Midnight walking beside him.
“Do me a favor and occasionally tease Sunburst with that nickname I made up for him,” Shining requested to Midnight.
“I would, but Sunspot is the name of his father,” shrugged Midnight.
“Okay...I hope you don’t mind, but I need to vent a bit, and maybe talk about the different versions of Celestia there are,” Shining said.
“In my Equestria, Celestia is my godmother,” stated Midnight. “She’s the one who cast a spell on me as I was dying so that I’d be reincarnated. She made sure I would be born to her Captain of the Guard and his wife, the Madam Librarian of the Royal Library, Ignitus Enflame and Faerie Tail. Celestia and I don’t always see eye to eye but we still care for each other, and I am her agent, dedicated to protecting Equestria.”
“That is a far cry from what my Celestia has become,” sighed Shining Armor. “She was a control freak, trying to create a ‘perfect’ future. The slightest deviation from what she wanted would get her angry and lash out. A few weeks ago, shortly after a portal to an Equestria where there existed a clone of Celestia who called herself Celly, she broke and became a megalomaniacal mare called Daybreaker...thankfully, Luna intervened and now she is in that other Equestria where she is going through treatment.”
“Huh… To tell you the truth, I’m kinda guilty of the same thing,” Midnight admittd, feeling like he was walking on eggshells.
“Due to the unusual circumstances of my rebirth and the time-travelling journey I experienced leading up to it, I had to remain hidden for a number of years. Then, at some point, I had to… nudge events towards intended outcomes, because I had to make sure events played out as I’d experienced them in my past life. Don’t think too hard on it, it still gives me a headache!”
“That’s a lot tamer than what Daybreaker wanted to do when I was behind two deviations,” Shining said with a sigh and I eloped with Cadance rather than go through the whole wedding debacle, and she looked ready to cut off my boy bits. When I prevented her from disbanding the Equestrian Military and having the Royal Guard take over those places, she looked ready to murder me.”
“Whoa… Heh, did you ever tell her to go snort her own hot air?” chuckled Midnight.
“I wish I did,” Shining stated. “But the two more recent moments of her openly hating deviations were mostly directed at either Cadance or the Celestia Clone I spoke about. The deviations being that Cadance was made a Seventh Element Bearer, the Element of Love. The other was when she discovered the portal, and she broke there.”
“Get out! I’m a Seventh Element Bearer,” Midnight smiled hearty, “Element of Faith, as a matter of fact.”
“Neato,” Shining whistled in awe.
“Yeah, as in, if you believe in me, then there is nothing I can’t do,” Midnight nodded with a solemn smile, “and there is nothing I wouldn't do for my family and my friends, and especially my Twily.”
“That’s good, good…” Shining paused in his steps. “I’m picking up smoke. I think we’re getting close.” He moved into a brisk jog, until he got to a set of bushes just outside of a burning village.
Midnight focused, channeling his pegasus magic, allowing him to see over long distances and he gasped, “That village is in trouble! It’s being ransacked and I see some weird ponies running around stealing, attacking, and throwing torches onto buildings or blasting them with magic!”
“What about the villagers? Can you distinguish them from the aggressors?” asked Shining.
“Hmm… looks like some ponies are running into that nearby warehouse,” reported Midnight, “but the attackers are starting to turn their attention to the warehouse. They’re already starting to burn it!”
“Midnight, protect the villagers in that warehouse,” ordered Shining Armor as he grasped hsi spear and formed a shield spell to resemble a large round shield on his left arm.
“I’ll handle the ransackers…”
“Sir, yes sir!” Midnight took flight and zoomed straight for the warehouse while Shining Armor charged forward without hesitation.
(Midnight Third POV)
As he approached the warehouse, Midnight quickly used an x-ray vision spell to see that the villagers were either trying to bar the door while the rest were on the verge of panicking as they were beginning to notice the warehouse exterior was being set on fire. Choosing his target, he closed his eyes, wrapped his wings around himself, cloaked his whole body with magic… and span as he became a shooting star of power that burst into the warehouse through a wall where none of the villagers were close to, quickly accessing the building under siege.
The villagers all cried out in alarm as they turned to see the mass of magic that had exploded into their sanctuary… before it dimmed to reveal a bipedal equine figure on his knee before he stood up, raised his hand, and made a sword appear as he spread his wings in a mighty flap, a mystic gale blowing away the remaining magic along with all the fire on the warehouse!
“Don’t be afraid, I’m here to help. Everypony gather towards the back, I have some spells that will protect you as you make your escape.”
Although bewildered and afraid, the villagers did as they were told while Midnight whispered the spells, readying them for casting. Once the villagers had gathered at the back of the warehouse, he pointed with his fingers at them while his horn lit with magic, and the villagers felt a soothing sensation spread across their bodies, calming them somewhat.
“You’ve all been given Aversion Wards, apart from myself and each other, nopony will pay you the slightest attention so long as you don’t try to attract attention. I’m going to blow that wall open, and the moment I do, all of you run for the forest nearby and hide until the coast is clear.”
Without waiting for their words of agreement or protest, Midnight concentrated a pulse of telekinetic power and blew the wall open before shouting, “GO!!”
The villagers wasted no time arguing as they hurried away, and just in time as the front doors finally burst open and Midnight saw the attackers venture inside, led by a tall and grizzled-looking minotaur mercenary, hefting a heavy battleaxe.
Smirking, midnight held up his sword and whispered, “Find the Light… Ember and Frost!”
The ebony blade shined with the radiance of a star before it split into two, one sword a blazing blistering blue that seethed with burning fury, the other a chilly pale blue-white as it gave off a frigid cold that chilled one to the bone. Crisscrossing the blades, creating a crackling hiss of the contradicting extreme temperatures, Midnight smiled wickedly, revealing is fangs as his pupils dilated into the eyes of a predator and he asked with a sinister tone, “Who dies first…?”
He was answered by a yell to his left and he quickly side-stepped a Cat Rogue being thrown his way with a stab wound to his chest bleeding profusely and behind him approached the mighty Shining Armor, his spear raised and dripping with blood as well as crackling with a red energy and his mana-construct shaped as a shield on his left arm. Transparent though it was, it bore the symbol of Omega. The End.
For those who dare stand against him, Midnight thought with an approving nod.
Shining stood ready to fight and said, “Let’s end them… Spartan Rage!”
Two of the attackers rushed forward, only for one to get brained in the forehead by the edge of Shining’s mana shield and the other to get blocked by it in the same motion and quickly stabbed by the spear and bashed by the shield. Shining took a quick glance back at Midnight before killing the enemy he recently bashed. He then ducked under the first attacker’s swipe and then jumped behind him, smashing the back of the guy’s neck in the process with his mana shield.
Meanwhile, Midnight had casually walked to the side, waiting for his turn and an opening and seized his chance the moment he saw it. He had his eyes on a diamond dog only for the minotaur to push the mongrel aside and stab at Midnight with a halberd, only for Midnight to effortlessly smack the weapon aside and then ruthlessly cut the bull’s shoulder and the side of his abdomen with Ember, the minotaur screaming as he felt his very flesh cook as it was cauterized at the same time to prevent bleeding.
Seeing the diamond dog coming from behind the minotaur, Midnight pushed the bull aside and raised his wings out in front of him, the wings suddenly becoming shrouded and coated with a smoky substance that the diamond dog struck with an overhead strike of his sword only to be deflected and pushed back as Midnight’s wings flapped outwards and Midnight stabbed at the mutt with Frost, only for the dog to use a shield to protect himself. Midnight quickly hammered the shield aside with Ember and stabbed the dog in the gut with Frost, the dog screaming all-too-shortly as he was engulfed in frigid energy that froze him solid… and Midnight simply tabbed the frozen-over feral, causing the dog to fall back and shatter into pieces of frozen meat!
Hearing a scream, Midnight turned to see Shining Armor stab another enemy through the back with his spear and nail him to the ground. After pulling the spear out, Shining took a combat ready pose directed in Midnight’s general direction and thrust his spear forward. Midnight narrowly avoided the spear, and saw it was impaled into the minotaur’s gut, killing him.
Seeing another foe coming, Midnight rushed forward, using a flap to assist with his jump onto Shining’s shoulder to jump forward and come down hard onto the foe, a griffon, breaking his spear with Frost, quickly maneuvering himself around the birdcat and then impaling the griffon in the back with Ember, the blade erupting from just beneath the throat, and the griffon screeched in agony as he was engulfed in blistering fire that burned him to ashes. Just before the griffon completely disintegrated, Shining hammered his head with his mana shield, knocking his beak off as it burned.
Another attacker came forward ready to fight, but was distracted by seeing one of his comrades burning alive. Shining and Midnight looked at each other briefly, getting the same idea. While Midnight joined his swords together into a swordstaff, Shining rushed forward, jumped over the thug’s sword and stabbed him, pushing him towards Midnight. The alicorn span his swordstaff, creating a frightening display of beauty in the form of frigid cold and blistering fury as he easily knocked the enemy’s sword out of his grasp and struck him with a spin of the sword staff across the chest, leaving him uncertain as to whether he was burning or freezing, and stumbling towards Shining. He then hammered him with his shield and stabbing his chest, holding him in place, allowing Midnight to duck under the spear and slash at the foe’s legs. Shining pulled the spear out and elbowed his face, pushing the foe to the Alicorn standing behind him.
Instead of using his swordstaff, which he split back into two, Midnight raised his long leonine tail, manifesting a blade of solidified shadow from the tip and stabbed it forward into the bad guy’s shoulder, lifting him clear off his feet, letting him suffer for a few moments… before whipping around and throwing him towards the warehouse doors, causing them to burst open as he tumbled over a few times before finally dying.
The rest of the attackers saw their fallen comrade… as two mighty stallions confidently strode forward with grim looks on their faces. The two then stopped a short distance from the attackers, weapons raised to show they were ready for more. The attackers looked at each other and began to flee in a semi-organized fashion. A few, a Cat, a griffon, a unicorn, and a pegasus, ended up tripping over themselves or each other, and Midnight quickly seized the moment as his shadow stretched out and connected to the abandoned criminals and they found themselves unable to move.
While they panicked and complained, the two stallions again strode forward as Shining Armor asked, “How did you do that? It’s like what you did in their earlier with your wings.”
“I’m of lunar pony descent,” explained Midnight. “I can give substance to shadow using my mana and morph and manipulate it in various ways, including using shadow to render someone immobilized. What I did in their earlier, I used my own shadow to cloak my wings with solid shadow as shields, it’s one of my typical means of defense in melee combat.”
“Huh, that’s much cooler than what I can do with my shadow,” Shining commented, as he collapsed his spear, dispelled his mana shield, and then propped his hands up, making what looked like a dog shadow puppet with his shadow, prompting a chuckle from the sapphire alicorn, who reverted Ember and Frost back into their one sword form and absorbed it back into his body..
“Well then,” Midnight turned his gaze to their prisoners, giving them a sinister smirk, making sure they saw his fangs as he malevolently asked, “What do we do with all of you...?”
The thugs all expressed terror and panic and quickly started rambling all at once about ‘ponies in masks’ and ‘it was easy gold’ to the alicorn.Midnight narrowed his eyes before roaring, “SILENCE!!!!”
When they all clammed up, one of them whimpered and the others started groaning in disgust. A quick sniff and Midnight sighed with light frustration to realize one of the thugs had wet himself.
“I don’t care who, but one of you. Explain calmly and clearly, just what in the name of Faust were you doing attacking this village and why?”
“We’re part of a down-on-our-luck mercenary company, and some oddly dressed ponies came to us and offered us more gold than we knew what to do with, only if we were to attack this village.” the pegasus among the prisoners told Midnight.
Midnight looked to Shining Armor, certain he had questions too, and the large unicorn stepped forward, his massive arms crossed, “Care to describe these ponies?”
We couldn’t see who they were,” another merc, the unicorn, answered. “They wore these black cloaks that hid their cutie marks and were enchanted to hide their coat and tail colors. We couldn’t even see their faces. They wore white masks that had black stars and red tears painted on them.”
Shining took a deep breath and looked at Midnight.
“See if you can have these guys stored away or something so we can get them locked up,” he said, while pinching the bridge of his muzzle. “The next few days are going to be Tartarus.”
Midnight nodded before lighting up his horn and engulfing the prisoners within a bubble of turquoise mana and then tapping it with his fingers, causing it to pop, and the prisoners were gone with it.
“I sent them to my Alicorn Dimension,” Midnight explained, “All alicorns have them in my world; they’re these pocket dimensions in which we can store anything, as well as other interesting tidbits.”
“Can they get out?” asked Shining Armor.
“Only if I let them out,” assured Midnight. “Right now, they’re enjoying a cozy visit in a cramped dungeon cell. In my Alicorn Dimension, I can change the reality in it with but a thought, and make anything I imagine real as long as it’s within my Alicorn Dimension. I can’t make something there and bring it out here, however. It’d just fade from existence.”
“Well, at least you shaved at least one day off of the Days of Tartarus I’ll have to deal with,” Shining said with a bored tone. “Now let’s check up on the rest of the team and get the Days of Tartarus over and done with.
“What about the villagers?” brought up Midnight.
“And you added a week on them...congratulations Midnight, your vacation has been extended to help me with that,” Shining grumbled before starting to walk away.
“Hold on, let’s just give the all-clear, assure them that the threat has been dealt with and have some pattols remain for a while to give them a sense of security,” suggested Midnight.
Shining stopped and turned to give the alicorn a glare that could rival Fluttershy’s, and Midnight feared he might have said the wrong thing… until Shining responded, “You give the all clear, and I’ll send Nebula and Greg to handle the patrols. Other than that, I would like to take care of these next few Days of Tartarus ASAP.”
He then resumed his walk away while Midnight quietly phew’d in relief.
Midnight quickly found the villagers he’d sent to hide in the woods and gave the all-clear. Though they were understandably afraid and reluctant, he led them back into their home and assured them that their safety would be seen to, as some patrols would arrive shortly to watch over them for a while just in case anything else happened. Once that was done, Midnight joined Shining at the edge of the village and the big unicorn sighed, “Let’s go…”
Author's Note
This chapter is done in collaboration with Wolven5 (https://www.fimfiction.net/user/100585/Wolven5) and his story MLP: The Story Retold (https://www.fimfiction.net/story/191317/mlp-the-story-retold).

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          Chapter 5: Portals and Demons (part 1)           
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Chapter 5: Portals and Demons (part 1)
(Edge Clearing in Everfree, Shining POV)
The mystery light turned out to be from a portal ringed with stones etched with Norse runes and had a short stone path running through the portal. Not knowing what I was up against, I kept myself out of view as best I could while approaching. As I did so, I could hear some voices from the other side of the portal.
“Huh. I thought the world’s time was synchronized…” I was barely able to hear from a female.
“Wait, I don’t think this is your world. Look, the Equestrian Moon.” I heard from a similar sounding female voice. I shifted my position in the bush I was hiding in and I saw...Two Celestias? My shock nearly froze me in place, but I had to quickly thrust out an arm to keep from falling over...and said arm was in view of the two Celestias. ‘Please don’t see my arm! Please don’t see my arm!’ I thought frantically to myself as they spoke further without me paying attention to their words.
I turned my attention back to the portal and saw that one of the Celestias looked through the portal with a look of concern on her face, more than the other one. I then noticed a number of differences between the two Celestias. The concerned one looks like Celestia (and you can’t deny the Celestia look), while the other one has her flowing mane done up in a ponytail and had some makeup on as well.
My hand suddenly began to slip a bit, and I tried to reorient myself in the bush, but I ended up slipping up and landing face first out of the bush with a slight yelp. I looked up at the portal and saw that they were now staring at me. “Well shoot me with a spitwad, I’ve been caught.” I muttered to myself. Neither of the Celestias moved or said anything, and I took that as an opportunity to carefully stand up, so as to not scare them anymore than they probably were.
I stood up at my full height and they kept staring, as I matched their shared height. “...Is it just me, or does that version of Shiny look like Spiderman’s Juggernaut?” The ponytail Celestia asked the regular Celestia.
“You’re right...How odd.” Regular Celestia commented. “Excuse me, but I don’t suppose you’d be willing to have a chat?”
“Sure, but just to clarify, I’m not a Juggernaut hybrid, and isn’t Juggernaut an X-Men thing?” I asked. I suddenly realized what I said and clapped my hands over my mouth with wide eyes. “Shite, I accidentally let it slip!” I muttered in frustration.
“Guess just about any Shiny is still a nerd in some capacity...wait, X-men? You know the human version?” Ponytail Celestia asked in surprise.
“Cat’s out of the bag, might as well go with it.” I muttered. “Well, when you die as a twenty four year old human gun fanatic, only to wake up in a void, talking to a few choice characters and then waking up as a four year old anthro Shining Armor and live twenty years, you sometimes long for some old time nostalgia...and all of that while being one of only two anthro ponies among regular quadruped ponies.” I let out with a bit of a sigh. I then looked around the clearing and saw a few berries on a bush in their view , thankfully raspberry, and I took and ate them.
“...Oh. Well, I’m kinda in the same boat. I turned into her in a fiery explosion at school and spent a year on Earth before being sent to Equestria, but...pretty much the same ex-human boat really. I guess.” Ponytail Celestia said awkwardly.
Celestia rolled her eyes and stepped in. “We still have that demon problem on Earth to take care of.” She said. “As interesting as an alternate Equestria is, we have our priorities.”
“Oh yeah. Think we got the wrong runes?” Ponytail Celestia said, starting to look at the ruins on her side of the portal.
“Wait, demons on Earth? I’m lost and confused on that bit.” I said, concern showing on my face. I then noticed Ponytail Celestia’s bag...it looked like- “And why does that bag look like something...I can’t put my finger on it...right on the tip of my tongue…” I began rambling a little.
“Oh yeah, I brought my laptop from Earth with me and I can still contact some friends of mine from here. It’s how I know there’s demons invading my home.” She said, answering my unasked questions. “Oh yeah, you go that rune wrong. It’s got a third kinda-leg here, you missed that part.”
“Oh! Strange, how did I miss that?” Celestia asked as he lifted up new stones and setting up a new portal.
I stepped through the portal once the other one was set up and working and placed a hand on Ponytail Celestia’s withers as she was cringing from the air pollution from Earth. “Do you mind if I tag along, Celestia?” I asked her.
“Eh, I don’t see why not. Just be careful. I don’t want some Hellhound turning you into a meal. If you’re coming with us though, introductions are in order. My name’s James Solaris, but you can call me Celly.” She said.
“Sounds fair, and my previous human name no longer means much, if anything, to me. Especially since by now, I’m now probably registered as dead. So, just refer to me as Shining Armor.” I told her.
“Alright Shiny. Let’s go hunt some demons.” Celly said, before standing on two legs and cartwheeling into the portal. Celestia only facehoofed and shook her head at her “twin’s” antics. She then spread her wings and entered the portal. I followed behind the two and took a deep breath of the smoldering and polluted air and coughed a bit.
“Yep, just like Earth for humans to be idiots with the environment.” I said through a cough.
“More like, just like cultists to summon asshole demons that wrecks the shit out of everything in sight. Don’t blame humans for the actions of one cult.” Celly corrected with a scowl on her face.
I cracked my knuckles and formed shields around them. “So, where to first?” I asked. Celly didn’t answer and simply looked around, as if she was looking for something. An explosion happen a few blocks South of our position. I took off in that direction at a respectable pace, allowing Celly and Celestia to follow, the former kickin up dust doing so.
Arriving at the source of the explosion, we found some demonic looking minotaur. It had Ashen black skin, no hair of any kind, a red face, glowing green eyes, all sorts of blade shaped bones protruding from its arm, and it was tall enough to stare into a 4th story window at full height.
At the current moment, it was holding a car with an unconscious woman in it, readying to throw it at a tank that was coming towards it. I wasted no time and rushed to the Demontaur and fired a pulse projectile spell into it’s leg, right at the knee joint. This caused it to fall into a one kneed kneel, and to drop the car. I rushed under it and managed to catch it, just barely. I carefully placed the car down and placed a shield around it and cast an armor flesh spell on myself.
The Demontaur was pissed when it stood up and readied to stomp me, but a combination of a Light blast and a tank round took it by surprise. Leaving one half of itself with a nasty looking sunburn and a hole through its chest. It fell down dead and the tank then pointed it’s turret at us. I immediately kneeled on the ground and placed my hands behind my head. “Celly, Tia, stand down, let them take us into custody. It’ll be easier to establish trust with them if we-"
"No need. They know me." Celly cut me off.
“Hwah?” I looked at her confused. “No offence, but if you were in your current form for a year, wouldn’t many want your existence kept secret so as to not upend this world’s perception of reality?”
"Surprisingly, the scientific community actually took my existence as proof of Multiverse Theory. It didn't take long for my transformation to get on the internet anyway, since I literally blew up a high school during lunch hour." She said. “And with my face already on the internet and going viral, there was no reason to hide me away...beyond tests that explored my limits.”
A man wearing the stripes of a lieutenant exited the tank and walked up to the three of us. “Welcome back to Earth, Solaris. I see you’ve brought company.” The man greeted.
Celly smiled. “Glad to be back, bro. Though I wish it were for different reasons.” She said, giving him a salute. The man looked at Tia and I.
“Princess Celestia. Shining Armor. Glad to have your aid. The two of you should be commended on your swift action. You saved a life and also helped eliminate the demon my men have taken to calling Wrath. It’s nature made it nearly invincible in the heat of combat, and that made it the biggest problem. With that one out of the way, we can focus on actually finding the remaining six.” The man said.
I stood up and saluted as well. “No thanks necessary. I’m just doing my job as a member of the Equestrian Armed Forces. And when you called that thing Wrath, are you talking about the ‘Seven Deadly Sins’ kind of Wrath?” I asked the soldier.
“I am. In fact, all seven demons unleashed in the city correspond to each of the sins. Pride hasn’t made any destructive moves, but seems to be commanding the others somehow. The commander has suggested we save that one for last, since we have no idea what unrestrained chaos the city would face without Pride’s control. Thankfully, Pride seems to have taken up residence in an abandoned church, so we know where it is at all times.” The solder added.
“I see. Do you have any leads on the others?” Celestia asked.
“Only that they’re following their natural instinct right now. Pride seems to want to make this a game, and promised information in return for killing the other sins.” The soldier said.
Celly chuckled. “That’s a deal with the devil nobody will want or need. Tia and I can hunt them down or lure them out ourselves.” She bragged. “Isn’t that right?”
Tia nodded. “Locating demons is almost child’s play for me. Fighting on the other hand...it’s difficult to face a primal sin without succumbing to it.” She stated.
“And what does that make me? A Butterball turkey?...actually, bad analogy.” I said, feeling embarrassed at what I said.
“Well, that shield spell looked pretty powerful. Seems like you’re the designated tank.” Celly pointed out to me.
“Fair point. Also, I had a thought that makes me laugh and feel bad at the same time.” I said. “Facing the Seven Deadly Sins means dealing with Sloth...and I personally hope it isn’t represented by an actual Sloth, because I would have a hard time killing something like that.”
“Don’t worry. Sloth actually has no physical manifestation. It’s reportedly a dream demon that takes the shape of your fears when you go to sleep. Be warned, if you do find Sloth in your dreams, it will be able to kill you from there.” Soldier Boy said.
“So basically Freddy Kreuger.” Celly summarized.
“Yes.” Confirmed Soldier Boy.
“We should have brought Luna then.” Tia groaned.
“Then who’s fat arse is gonna go and get her?” I asked, putting on my ‘Captain face’. “The longer she isn’t here, the more time Sloth has to mind *BLEEP* more innocents.”
Celly rolled her eyes at me. “I’ll go, since I’m virtually useless in a real fight compared to you two.” She said before trotting off to the portal.
Tia stayed with us, and I looked around. “So, what city is this?” I asked Soldier Boy.
"New York City. We're in Manhattan." He answered.
“Huh. If I was any other pony, I would have tried to correct you on it’s pronunciation.” I commented. “I guess that’s a perk for being a former human like Celly is.”
The soldier merely raised an eyebrow. "A story for another time I suppose. Let's worry about the Sins for now. The next target is going to be Envy. Her power has her stealing weapons and skills right out of a soldier's hands. We can't get close anymore with that rpg she's gotten a hold of."
“Well, that’s not good...unless…” I thought out loud.
"You have an idea?" Celestia asked.
“It’s simple and probably stupid one that relies on Envy’s kleptomania and a theory of if she can return skills...and physical attributes.” I started explaining. “If Celestia, Luna, and/or Celly placed a type of safeguard on my magic, we can let Envy steal my physical strength...and when she goes to use ‘her’ weapons, she ends up breaking them. And with my safeguarded magic, I can keep myself alive and maybe encase her in a shield bubble.”
“Sounds simple enough. We can try, but I think we’ll need divine magic to make it work.” Celly said, having returned from the portal with Luna in tow.
“That was quick.” I stated in amazement.
“I had already been on my way to investigate the portals Celly created. It wasn’t difficult to find.” Luna said. “Now then, Celly tells me we have a dream demon problem. I may need to bring the demon into reality for it to be harmed.”
Soldier Boy spoke up. “If it’s anything like the Nightmare on Elm Street, it might be better to find it an eternal prison. I can provide firepower, but if it just escapes into the dream world when it dies in reality, then it’ll just become an endless cycle of killing it over and over again.”
“How surprisingly astute. That is correct, but for a prison to work well, we will have to weaken the demon first. I’ll take it to Tartarus personally.” Luna said.
“While you are there, maybe check and maybe reinforce the security to make sure you don’t have problems in the future.” I said, thinking of the catastrophes that could happen if their hell residents escaped.
“I already spoiled everything to Celestia. She knows Tirek is going to get out at some point, but I also told her how that event will finish Discord’s reform and give the Element bearers new powers. Anyway...let’s get to work on them demons.” Celly said.
“I’ll share some counter arguments later, as we need to focus on the here and now.” I said with a sigh. “So, what do you mean when you said divine magic?”
“It’s known that demons have a weakness for holy powers. Paladins are known for smiting the shit out of demons, demons are known for their unholy power.” Celly said, placing emphasis on the demon’s unholiness.
Celestia nodded. “A similar analogy can be made for Dark and Light, but frankly it wouldn’t be true. Thankfully, I have access to an order of paladins in Equestria. The public doesn’t know about them, but they should be a great help.” Celestia proposed.
Luna nodded as well. “I’m surprised you kept them around. They weren’t terribly useful before I was corrupted.” She said.
Celestia scuffed a hoof, looking a bit bashful. “The creatures you stirred up from the moon made them necessary.” She explained.
“Oh. My apologies.” Luna said with a look of realization.
“So, we can get these Paladins of the Brotherhood of Light or whatever and we can pull off the ‘bait and switch’ on Envy. Sounds like a plan.” I said, before my stomach growled a little. “But first, some food and rest for all of us. We’re gonna need it.”
“...Eh, debatable.” Celly said with a shrug.
Soldier Boy took out an MRE from his pack and held it out to me. “Bacon flavor without any meat. Don’t know if you miss the taste or anything, but I sure would.” He offered.
I took the tiny MRE and did the proper heating preparations for it. “It’s not a concern when you had to grow up again from age four. And there is no such thing as a true herbivore, as on my Equestria, we do eat meat, but we call it protein and more often than not, it is imitation kind of stuff.” I explained
“I see.” Soldier Boy said.
Celly then summoned a cupcake and ate it, causing Celestia to look on in envy. “Oh yeah. And no way is Celestia gonna mess with Gluttony. He’d probably lure her in with cake and eat her.” She said, causing Luna to burst out laughing and Celestia scoffed.
A heart chilling hiss came from all around us and yet nowhere, causing us to freeze on the spot. “̸̊̐s̴̳̀e̵͒̀n̸͓͑s̴͐̽é̷̘ ̶͖͝E̸͔̊n̷̩̈v̸̀̃ȳ̸̗.̷́͘.̵̌̃.̵́́” A voice hissed with a demonic distortion. Okay, now if I didn’t have control over my bladder, I would have pissed myself. Celestia cast some sort of spell, Soldier Boy went back to the tank, and Luna cast a spell that revealed that both Princesses were armed and armored. I quickly cast a stronger flesh armor spell and readied a sword and shield construct.
“Show yourself, Demon.” Celestia demanded, using a magically enhanced voice.
“If you insisssst…” The demon responded. A wall nearby then started to decay and Envy crashed through it. The demon had a crow and Naga look to it, and stared at us with hateful jealousy.
“You know, of everything you could have looked like, I’m very disappointed.” Celly teased, causing it to look at her with a scowl. “Darksiders 3 did a better job of portraying you really. At least then you looked competent.” That insult only made it mad and it dived at her. I quickly stepped in front of Celly and caught it from landing it’s attack, causing me to slide back with it’s fanged beak only inches from my face. I then noticed that Celly wasn’t even behind me, having teleported at the last second.
“Oh, yes. Make fun of the demon known for jealousy.” Luna said sarcastically. She replicated her swords and began launching a flurry of blades into the demon’s side.
“Do you three have a telepathy spell channel or something?” I asked as I held the pissed demon back. “Because if we can voice our ideas instead of acting on instinct like I did and not knowing Celly would move....” I left the sentence unanswered to let them fill in the blank. I pulled the demon’s head down and put my full weight onto it, causing it’s head to get pinned to the cement. The neck suddenly snapped and it froze for a second and went limp.
Celly had a look of shock as she stared at what I did. “...Did you just kill it by sitting on it?” She asked incredulously.
“It was my intention to pin it, not kill it.” I said as I got off the dead demon. “And I constantly underestimate my strength, weight, and the Equestrian building codes for floors above ground level.”
“You can say that again…” I barely heard from Celly. “Though honestly, I was about to telefrag it when you stepped in.”
“Which is why we need to have a means of communication that the demons can’t tap into.” I said. I then noticed the demon’s chest still moving. “One moment.” I then turned to stomp it’s chest, but it’s serpentine tail suddenly swept me off my feet and onto my fat arse. The tail then came around and hit me, sending me rolling like a ball. I heard the sound of a teleport followed by exploding flesh. I was then caught in golden magic before I did any damage to anything.
“...Well, now we know it’s dead.” Celly said. I recovered from my dizziness to notice that Celly was laying on her back and some of the joints of her legs looked a little off. She tried using magic to do something to them, but flinched in pain. Luna then activated her magic on Celly and popped them back into place. She took some heavy breaths through her teeth in pain.
“Next time, use a shield first.” Luna said to her in a stern but caring tone.
Celly nodded as she tried getting back on her hooves. “Maybe a rest would be nice…” She conceded.
Soldier Boy spoke up. “Let’s get you all to a checkpoint my squad set up. We had the local church set up holy wards to keep the demons out.” He said, gesturing for us to follow him. He also gestured to the tank to lead the way.
Tia turned to head to the portal. “I’ll be right with you. I’m going to fetch my paladins.” She announced, and flew back to the portal.
(Military Checkpoint, Shining POV)
It took us a few minutes to arrive at the checkpoint and upon arrival, Luna took Celly to the nearby infirmary tent, probably to check for damage on her barely fixed legs. It took a bit of a longer time to wait for Celestia to return with her paladins, so I took the opportunity of time to interact with the soldiers and if it weren’t for the fact that they somehow had a surplus of rations and other food items, I would have eaten all of their food. Heck, a couple minutes before Celestia showed back, some of the soldiers decided to entertain themselves by tossing hard boiled eggs (without their shells) into the air for me to catch in my mouth when they came down.
Celestia then arrived with her paladins. “I managed to ward the portal to my world. Let’s hope none of the demons slipped into my world before I could do that.” She said, glancing at the egg game me and the soldiers were doing briefly. “Now then, let’s get down to business.” I stopped the egg game, accidentally spearing the last egg on my horn. I followed Celestia to the command tent, and on the way, I saw Luna allowing Celly leaving the infirmary tent with Luna close behind. She saw my horn and had a hard time not laughing.
We all got to the command tent, where Soldier Boy and two other people were waiting for us. “Dave, Jackie. I’m surprised to see you two here.” Celly greeted the two, using a poker face when looking specifically at the woman, presumably Jackie, who had a rather questionable t-shirt on.
“I tried to talk her out of it, I swear.” The guy, presumably Dave, said with slight panic in his voice.
“I’m more surprised humans are aware of this side of my sister despite it never appearing on the kids show.” Luna commented, evidently amused. Tia, on the other hand, wasn’t and Celly patted Tia on her back in reassurance.
“Moving on!” Soldier Boy interrupted harshly. “We still have five high class threats to discuss. Lust, Sloth, Greed, Gluttony, and Pride.”
“And Pride, for now, is on the lower end of the high class spectrum, right?” I asked, getting into business mode. The two princesses glanced my way and Tia took the egg off my horn. “Thanks and sorry. I forgot that was there.”
“Yes, but Pride has made it abundantly clear that she still poses a threat. She tells us she plans on ‘Testing humanity’s worth’ and ‘weighing humanity’s sins’ in a sort of judgement.” Soldier Boy informed us. “But she’s leaving us alone for now to let us play her game.”
“Okay, so, no matter how we slice this cake, it’s a horrible mess to be dealt with.” I said. “So, which of the other four is our next target?”
“Preferably Sloth. The wards don’t protect our dreams, and several of our men have been forced to inject adrenaline to avoid death by sleep.” He answered grimly.
Luna growled in hate. “I’ll hunt that fiend down immediately.” She said with a growl. “No one should be forced to avoid sleep. It’s too important to neglect.”
“Will we need ‘bait’ of some kind?” I asked. “Because if we can’t find volunteers among the soldiers for that, one of us here has to do it.”
“There will be no need for that. I’ll challenge it directly. But I’m going to ask you all to join my dream to challenge it with me.” Luna told us.
Celly seemed to get excited. “Ooh! Just like the episode where you pull Ponyville together to take on the Tantabus!” She said with a great amount of glee.
Luna looked embarrassed at those words. “Oh. That explains why Tia suddenly got onto me about that last week.” She said to herself with a pout.
“I can agree that self-harm and hate like that is not a good thing...even in the name of punishment.” I said, before sitting down on the concrete. “Whenever you’re ready, let’s give Sloth a non-sloth worthy beat down.
Luna, Tia, and Celly looked at me with a questioning look. “Uh. Are you sure you don’t want a bed first?” Luna asked.
“Luna, first off, unlike your Shining, I’m part of the Equestrian Military, not a part of the Royal Guard. I’ve been trained to sleep on almost any surface. Secondly, if you haven’t noticed, I’m a bit of a tubby, so the only thing a mattress is going to do is go flat instantly, if not shank me with metal springs.” I said with a flat tone.
The three alicorns shared a confused look. “There’s a military beyond SMILE and the Royal Guard?” She asked for them all.
“Yes, but we can discuss world similarities after the ugly Sloth is taken care of.” I said before laying down on my back and closing my eyes. “And don’t even think about using my gut as a mattress or pillow! That privilege is exclusive to my wife!” I then on personal command, fell asleep.
(Dreamscape)
When I supposedly woke up, it looked like we were still in New York City, but without the damage and most of the demons around. I stood up and looked around and saw the rest of the group just barely waking up as well, but I couldn’t see Celly…until I looked up towards the dream sun and I saw Celly in rather impractical and skimpy armor...and she looked like Demon hunter from a game I never really played..
“Dear Goddess, you just had to look like an armored super model that wants to look badass and also attract unwanted attention?” I asked rhetorically while holding my head.
“Unwanted?” She scoffed. “Please, I *BLEEP*ing rule my dreams! Sloth hardly stands a chance.” She stated with an air of cockiness and arrogance.
“Well, she’s not wrong.” Luna said with a shrug. “I’ve seen it first hoof.”
Soldier Boy facepalmed. “You’d think she would try being a guy again with the power over dreams she has.” He said in annoyance.
Celly flew down to our level and blew a raspberry at his face. “You’re just jealous.”
Soldier Boy rolled his eyes and snapped his fingers, changing his attire to that of a Spartan from the Halo series. “You wish” He said with a smirk as he checked over his new Equipment.
Luna took the opportunity to change her form and equipment and she took on an anthro form with more practical armor.
“So, you decided to join the bipedal club?” Celly asked teasingly.
“Indeed.” Luna answered. “This battle is going to be unpredictable, and in a dream, anything works if you believe it will. Not to mention, your dreams have convinced me how much more effective and creative a bipedal combat style can be.”
Celly looked at Tia, who looked back with an expression that seemed torn between exasperation and inspiration. She then sighed. “Fine, if I must.” She then clapped her hooves and became bipedal and was wearing heavy looking Paladin gear.
Seeing all the creativity around me, at least with those four, I felt left behind, and so I snapped my fingers and...well, let’s just say, ‘fat’ and ‘itty-bitty living space’ shouldn’t work together. “You realize you can break the rules, right?” I barely heard Celly say.
I forced one of my hands out of the lamp nozzle and...let’s just say, did something crude and rude, before I tried waving someone over. The lamp suddenly vanished and I ‘exploded’ out of the lamp’s confinement, and I was larger than normal and was wearing Arabian themed clothing. “Ooh, Robin Williams Genie. Good choice.” Soldier Boy complimented.
Before I could say anything, a shadow seemed to start hovering over us. Looking up, I saw the demon we were hunting. Sloth had taken a combined appearance of Godzilla, a radroach...or cockroach, and an almost uncountable collection of bugs. “Okay, that is ugly.” I commented before I changed my outfit to that of an exterminator while still maintaining my Genie look. I pulled a simple gas mask on and began spraying huge amounts of chlorine gas strength levels of pesticide at him.
Soldier Boy started going ham on Sloth with a grenade launcher while Celestia and Luna began conversing amongst themselves on how to fight. Celly then went Giant Magma Slime, seeming to scare Sloth. “Oh shit. I hate lucid dreamers.” It said just before Celly jumped on him, causing it to scream in pain.
This seemed to inspire Luna and Celestia, as Tia also became a magma slime, and Luna transformed into some kind of Black Wendigo. I also shifted size and changed into a German WW1 flame trooper outfit, complete with a functioning, multi-setting, flammenwerfer. I then saw Luna and Celestia start to go after the fleeing demon.
“What the *BLEEP* are you freaks?! No one can face a nightmare like this!!” Sloth seemed to scream in fear.
Luna laughed evil like. “You? A Nightmare? Don’t make us laugh. All you are is a collection of phobias. But me? I am the Goddess of the Night. The Dream Warden. And your worst Nightmare!” She declared, seeming to go all villian on him.
In the meantime, I was using my flammenwerfer to clean up stray bugs that sloth left behind. “You like my Flammenwerfer!? It ‘Werfs Flammen’!!!” I shouted as Celly and Tia began corralling the survivors of my ‘German Rage’ towards Luna for her to freeze into a frost statue. They all then shrunk down and reverted to normal, with me following suit. “You know, when we wake up, I’m gonna need a beer or something to get that ‘German moment’ out of my mind.”
Celly chuckled. “Told you Sloth didn’t stand a chance. He’s used to weak prey who fear him for his power over dreams. He didn’t know how to handle fearless lucid dreamers.” She said.
Luna laughed a hollow and echo sounding laugh. “I suppose the logic can’t be refuted. Though us all together made the battle rather boring, wouldn’t you say?” Luna said.
“To some extent. Now that we’re somewhat relaxed, I should mention that you three look good as Anthros. Maybe I can talk with Caddy and Twily about making that Anthro Enchanted jewelry for you three, once this is over and you are okay with that kind of gift.” I offered.
Celly seemed to freeze and stare at me in scrutiny. The others groaned. “Oh, boy. Now you’ve done it.” Soldier Boy stated. Celly then had a giant grin on her face, but before she could do anything else, she vanished from the Dreamscape.
“Wake up!” I shouted to the others. I then willed myself awake.
(Military Checkpoint)
Waking up, I saw Celly looking at her hooves in disappointment. However, she had a brief glance at me that seemed to reawaken her excitement. “Uh, yeah. I’d be happy to accept the offer.” She said to me. “I really miss having hands. So many missed opportunities to raise a middle finger have passed me by.”
“Well, when I get home, I’ll set Caddy and Twily on it.” I said to her. “And do the Royal Sisters have any objections to the offer or the fact that Celly is going to go Anthro?”
Both sisters shook their heads. “I’ll admit, it...it felt rather interesting, and I’m interested in trying it out.” Tia said.
“And I look forward to trying out the practical side of it.” Luna added.
“Then I’ll get that going when I get home. Also, I hope you don’t mind that when I get the items for you-” I pointed at Celly. “-It’ll be the permanent version....unless you say otherwise. As for you two-” I pointed at the two princesses. “-Will get a reversible version...unless you say otherwise.”
Celly shrugged. “Sounds good to me. I still have that ‘reset to default’ illusion spell that makes me look exactly like you, so a permanent version is fine by me.” She said, pointing at Tia when mentioning the spell.
The Sisters nodded in content. “I believe that is acceptable then.” Luna said for both of them.
“Alrighty then...and now, I need that beer I mentioned and I need to let my feet out of my boots for a bit...and don’t worry. Lemon freshness enchantment on and in my boots to prevent that typical bad shoe smell.” I said, stepping out of the tent and pulling my feet out of my boots, revealing my odd looking feet to the three alicorns.
“Oh. Hey. When you make mine, keep the feet out of it. I like my hooves.” Celly called out.
“Duly noted. Fill me in later on if Tia and Luna have the same reservations on feet vs. hooves.” I called back as I went to the mess hall area of the checkpoint and grabbed a beer to drink and sat on one of the more sturdy seats (aka, the side of a tank). After I sat, some of the soldiers came up to me and gave me some of the less liked choices of food (like Pickles) and to thank me for helping secure safety for their sleep.
A few sets of thanks and pickles from the soldiers later, and most of the camp had pretty much shut down. Everyone, except for the ponies, had been several days without sleep and they needed it badly. I noticed Celly looking at the sky, as if she was contemplating something. “Hey, Celly. You okay?”
“Just thinking about our next target.” She answered as she moved closer. “Not sure who we should target next.”
“A dilemma that’s better than having to deal with the ‘Golden Standards’ mucking up their jobs on almost a daily basis.” I said, holding out an unopened pickle jar. “Pickle?”
“No thanks.Celestia’s body seems to hate vinegar for whatever reason. Much as I liked adding pickles to my burgers, it sucks.” She responded.
“It’s okay.” I said, putting the jar down. “Now, let’s look at this a bit methodically. We, us two ponies, have no proper Intel on these demons, but we can piece together some scenarios based on their names and potential traits.” I put my chin on a fist. “We have Greed, Gluttony, Lust and maybe Pride.”
“My best guess, Greed has taken over a museum or corporate building, Lust is running a strip club, and Gluttony is eating everyone’s house and home.” Celly joked with a sans worthy grin.
“You’re not wrong, but we can leave room for error just in case.” I said. “Greed, the sin, not the demon, takes many forms, but in my mind, it’s probably worse when it goes criminal. Lust...the strip club thought has merit, but I would hate having to pull a ‘Dead Rising 3’ just to beat that. As for Gluttony, I’ll just hang back with that bit.” I gave my belly a bit of a pat before eating another pickle.
“Oh yeah, DR3. Forgot there were Psycho Bosses in that game that represent the sins.” She said with a thoughtful hum. “But let’s not forget Lust could potentially be a Succubus or Incubus. As far as I’m aware, those things are cursed so that lust is a biological need rather than a sin, however, so...maybe not?”,
“You make it sound like we could ‘rehabilitate’ lust so she can satisfy her biological needs in peace and without killing her.” I said. “Because I’m okay with that...and I’m not okay with that.”
“I mean, I did read a fanfic story where Diamond Tiara and Spoiled *BLEEP* were succubi, but Diamond Tiara hated it.” Celly said with a slight shudder of sympathy.
“I’m curious, but at the same time, I don’t want to know.” I commented. “So, we’ve thrown around a few ideas, our confidence is boosted, and my belly is full of pickles. Good talk...by the way, you want to know why I ‘trapped’ myself in that lamp when we were in the Dreamscape?”
Oh yeah. I just dismissed it as stupidity.” She smiled at the memory with a maliciously trollish grin.
“I was trying to get some Robin Williams Genie imitations/quotes in.” I stated. “I never had a true chance to do them in the past twenty years as Shining.”
“Yeah, it’s a shame...it really helps if you’ve got human tech with my Omniversal Internet enchantment. I kinda created that on accident, but it’ll give you permanent internet and you never have to pay a dime for it.” She said.
“In all honesty, I’ve never had need of the Internet for twenty years, so I’ll pass for now on that.” I responded. “Also… ‘Ever since those dancing mushrooms, have we seen this much intensity?’” I quoted from some of Robin Williams’ Genie outtakes.
Celly looked at me confused for a moment. “I...uh...I dunno what the heck you’re talking about.” She admitted bashfully.
“An old outtake of Robin Williams when he was doing his thing for Genie.” I explained….and then I quoted another outtake. “‘Time for Jafar cheer! Gimme a B, Gimme a B, Gimme a B-B-B, Gimme a B-B-B-B! What’s that spell?’” I then answered the quoted question by blowing out a raspberry sound.
She laughed at my silliness. “I haven’t watched the movie in ages, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen the outtakes.” Celly told me, giving a look of shame.
“Well, you’ve got your Internet, so after this crisis is over, you can watch the movie as a little treat for yourself. Heck, have Tia and/or Luna watch with you.” I told her.
“I think I will.” She said with a smile. “But for now. I should help the Paladins keep watch.”
“Sounds fair.” I answered. “Oh, and something to think about when you get back. Herds usually work with one male, but can it work with one female?” I said before I laid on the tank and started to snooze.
Author's Note
Part 1 Crossover with Switchlock's (https://www.fimfiction.net/user/175194/Switchlock) story Celestial Disposition (https://www.fimfiction.net/story/216560/celestial-disposition).
If you don't like the crossover, dislike my story, not Switchlock's story.