Ascension, or Celestia's Purgatorio

by Undome Tinwe

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Romance, Princess Celestia
Length: 5162

Celestia ascends the slopes of a mystical mountain to purify herself.

Celestia ascends the slopes of a mystical mountain to purify herself.

Originally written for the July 2019 Writeoff, with the prompt "Through Fire."

(2019-10-22) Featured on Equestria Daily!

Published 2019-09-18 22:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-09-18 22:20:01 UTC

A Divine Comedy

On that vast shore washed with the farthest sea, Celestia landed and bade hello to the Incorruptible One.

"Catty! It's so good to see you again!"

The Incorruptible One smiled. "Celestia. Is it that time of the millennium again?" All around him, a thousand souls flickered in and out of her view, motes of light that grew and shrank according to no Earthly logic.

"Oh, I had some vacation time, so I thought I'd stop by a bit earlier than usual," Celestia replied with a casual wave as she stepped out of the calm waters, her hooves squelching on wet sand.

"I see. Well, Zeal will be happy to see you taking the initiative." A worried frown creased the young stallion's brow. "I hope things are better than when last we spoke? You were rather distraught at the loss of your sister, and a hundred years of loneliness can weigh on a pony's heart."

"Oh, I'm much better now, Catty." Celestia grinned. "I have my sister back, and I have a new student too! She's incredible, like nothing I've ever seen." Beside her, she saw another spark land on the shore and fly past her heading towards the lone peak in the endless horizon.

"That is quite a statement, coming from one such as you." Catty turned from watching the newly-departed spirit to face Celestia with a look of interest. "I hope to one day meet her on these shores, though for your sake I hope that day is far, far away."

"Oh, she should be around in about a thousand years." A coy smile lit up Celestia's expression. "She managed to ascend, and become an alicorn."

For the first time in centuries, surprise showed on Catty's face. "Truly? That is most marvellous. Please, convey my sincerest congratulations to her when you return."

"I will. And how about you? Still don't want to make the climb?" Celestia glanced towards the edge of the endless plain once again, her eyes focused on the beacon of hope to all those who wandered.

"Somepony must guide the souls who arrive here," Catty replied with a shrug, waving as another soul flew past him. "It is good work, and it satisfies me."

"Well, take it from someone who's been around the block a few more times than you: sometimes, it's time to hand the reins over to the next generation, and enjoy some well-deserved rest."

Catty laughed. "It is rare for someone to call me young. I've missed not being the old fogey."

"Respect your elders," Celestia said with mock sternness. "I was ancient before you drew your first breath in life, Catty."

"Hey, that's my line!" The stern mask on both their faces dissolved into carefree grins. "Oh, it is good to speak with someone who remembers my old nickname. Well, I've held you up long enough. If you fly, you should be able to get past the Negligent Rulers before sunset. Though, please say hello to August for me if you see him."

"I will. Farewell, Catty."

Celestia spread her wings, and took to the heavens, flying away from the Incorruptible One and towards the mountain that loomed in the distance, its tip piercing the sky itself.

"Halt! Who dares approach the Terraces?"

"It's just me, Gatekeeper." Celestia didn't even flinch as the tip of a blade flew inches from her neck. She knew Gatekeeper liked her dramatics. It made up for the simplicity of her post, standing on a simple stone path carved into the base of the mountain and staring at a plain rock wall for all eternity.

"Ah, Celestia." The blade withdrew, and Gatekeeper shot her a sheepish smile. "My apologies. Are you here to make the ascent once again?"

"I am."

"Very well then." The blade flashed out, and Celestia felt a jolt of pain on her forehead. She conjured up a mirror and looked at the seven "P"s that had been carved around her horn.

"Your penmanship is improving," she commented as the pain subsided into a dull ache.

"Thank you," Gatekeeper replied. "You may continue now. May you be Enlightened and Purified of Sin." She sheathed her sword and stepped aside, allowing Celestia to pass through the hole in the stone in front of her that led to the start of her true journey.

"That mare really needs to find something else to live for besides her job," Celestia muttered before smiling to herself. "But then again, who am I to judge her for that?"

With a soft chuckle, Celestia stepped onto the First Terrace, and began her Ascent.

"Your stone is lighter this time," the Angel of Humility said as she walked alongside Celestia. "Barely a thousand pounds."

"T-Thank you," Celestia gasped out as she took another step, her back weighed down by a boulder that covered her entire withers. "I-Its been a humbling few years for me. I've been struck down far more times than I care to admit, and had to rely on my beloved student to save the day. She's a shining example of one who wields power without Pride, and she's helped me accept that I am only just a m-mare." Her hoof slipped on the gravel floor of the terrace, and Celestia barely kept herself upright as the stone shifted on her back.

"That is good," Humility said, making no move to help her. That would have defeated the purpose of the exercise. "Only by accepting the aid of others can we truly overcome Pride and embrace Humility."

"I should write that d-down." Another step. "Twilight will appreciate it." Celestia grunted. "How far do I still have to go?" She took a quick look around and saw nothing but the endless skies on her right and a row of statues to her left, the boring kind with ponies in all sorts of supplicant positions that Celestia didn't really care for. It reminded her too much of how easy it was to fall into the kind of thinking that led to carrying a bigger rock here.

"Celestia, it has only been a dozen yards since we began. You still have a mile to walk before your burden is lifted."

"Oh bother." Celestia shook her head of those dark thoughts, focusing instead on how nice it was to be able to depend on others now. "Well, at least there's that really nice spider statue to look at over there. Say, since I'll be here for a while, do you want to hear about the time that my Faithful Student encountered this travelling showmare, and learned to express herself without being prideful? I think you'll like this story..."

"Love those who have done harm to you."

"They have no wine..."

"Whoever captures me will kill me..."

"No, I'm Spartacus! Wait, wrong story... oh well, it still works."

Celestia pulled the coat she'd been given around her as the voices surrounding her continued to speak. "You know, I feel like you need to update some of these pithy lines. Most kids these days don't even know about Cane and Able's story anymore."

"Duly noted," said a voice on her left.

"Also, I feel like the purpose of giving us a really dull cloak to wear is defeated by also sewing our eyes shut." Celestia turned her head to the left as she spoke, anchoring herself to the familiar presence that had spoken to her.

"Why are you even in here?" The Angel of Charity muttered. "I didn't think you had an envious bone in your body! I'm not convinced that you aren't here just to bug me every thousand years."

"You would not believe how many times I've been tempted to shove off all my responsibilities to some poor usurper and let them drown in it," Celestia said with a smirk. "I'm just glad I found Twilight before I actually did something like that. Now, there's a mare who's actually worthy of responsibility. She probably wouldn't even care about wearing such an unfashionable cloak — you should've seen what she wore on her birthday a few years ago. Mare has no fashion sense, I swear! And don't get me started on that time she got her friend to help her design a dress—"

"Okay, we're here! Congratulations, you are free of Envy!" Charity pressed a hoof against Celestia's withers to stop her, and then used her magic to free her eyes.

"Oh, already?" Celestia blinked and looked ahead, confirming that they were indeed at the top of the Second Terrace. "Such a shame. I was hoping to tell you the story of how Twilight got her first student. I think you'd appreciate it, since it's a story about a pony overcoming their Envy." She looked behind her and saw an empty, desolate path that wound around the mountain with no decorations to speak of except for the natural striations in the dark rock.

"Maybe next time." Charity brushed her wing against Celestia's forehead, removing the second "P" just as Humility had removed the first. "Alright, on you go! Say hi to Peace for me!"

She gave Celestia a light tap on the rump to push her forward towards the stairs leading to the next terrace, making the princess squeak and sputter even as she continued her ascent.

"Hmmph, some mares..."

"...So anyway, Twilight finally got through Starlight's anger and convinced her to give friendship another try instead of holding on to hate. Then they reset the timeline and Starlight became Twilight's first student!"

Celestia trotted cheerfully through the acrid smoke alongside the Angel of Peace, regaling him with the tale of how her wonderful student had saved Equestria yet again. Through the thin haze of grey and black, she could see other souls milling about, their physical forms flittering in and out of existence as her own focus on them waxed and waned.

"Your student sounds like quite the firecracker," Peace said as they passed by another group of penitents coughing and wheezing in the smog. "Though, her habit of shooting first and asking questions later makes me think I'll be seeing more of her than you in the future."

A sigh escaped from Celestia's lips. "It's true. She's getting better, but she can sometimes be... passionate... about things. But that passion is also something incredible to watch in action. Twilight doesn't do anything by half-measures."

"Hmm, well, I suppose we'll see, then. Whoa!" They dodged around another group huddled together, pressing against the murals carved into the rock wall of the terrace as they continued their journey. "As I was saying, I am looking forward to meeting your former student. It can be difficult to judge the extent to which a pony will have to stay here based solely on descriptions of their deeds."

"True," Celestia said absently as she took a moment to admire the scenes of forgiveness depicted on the sides of the terrace. "What is it you always say? 'We do not purify actions or even thoughts, but the core purpose that rests in the heart'?"

"Close enough." Peace stopped them to bring Celestia's attention to one of the murals. She leaned in to get a clearer view that wasn't obscured by the choking fog, and saw a beautiful rendering of herself and Luna facing off against Discord, whose stone visage looked remarkably like the statue that had sat in her garden for over a thousand years.

"Oh, I don't think I've seen this one before," Celestia murmured as she pulled away, slightly confused as to why the terrace which was supposed to promote Peace had an image of her consumed by Wrath.

"It was still being created when you last visited," Peace replied.

"It's quite different from the others." Celestia nodded her head at the murals flanking it on each side, showing scenes of reconciliation and tearful reunions from wayward friends and family.

"We chose this moment for a reason." As Peace spoke, Celestia could sense the souls around them focusing their attention on him, prepared to hear his words of wisdom. "We seek to purge Wrath from the soul on this terrace, but not all anger comes from a place of hatred."

The hacking and wheezing of the crowds stilled to silence as Peace continued to speak. "Righteous anger, which drives us to right wrongs and fight for others, is something we respect, and it is for that reason that you hold this special place on this terrace. For though you hold anger in your heart, it is an anger that seeks to end injustice, to defend the weak, and to bring about a better world in defiance of those who would cause suffering. That is why you need not spend much time in purification here, for your anger is not Wrath, but Justice."

Celestia bowed to the angel. "You speak truth, oh fount of wisdom. I shall remember these words and keep them in my heart." The souls around them seemed to sense that the moment was over, as they began to fade away with the sounds of penitent suffering beginning anew.

"Laying it on a bit thick, huh?" Peace said dryly once they were alone again.

A smirk crossed Celestia's lips. "You were on a roll, and I didn't want to ruin your performance."

"I appreciate it," Peace said. "Having pithy sermons is part of the job description, anyways."

"Don't I know it," Celestia said with a roll of her eyes. "I'm really looking forward to introducing Twilight to you. I think you'll get along great."

"I eagerly anticipate that day." Peace winked at her. "But I'll always cherish our conversations, Celestia. Everypony else around here is too busy coughing up their lungs to speak." As if on cue, there was another chorus of hacking and wheezing by those who surrounded them. "It's nice to be with a pony who is free enough of her unseemly anger to help me dispell the loneliness."

"Anytime, Peacey." Celestia giggled a little before giving off a polite cough. After all, she wasn't completely immune to the fires of Wrath.

"...dona nobis pacem!"

"We're here." Peace sighed as he raised a wing. "I'll see you in a thousand years, then?"

Celestia gave him a quick hug. "You know, you're allowed to have some time off from time to time. You should all pick a day to come visit me in Canterlot. I'm sure Luna will be thrilled to see you — her thousand-year banishment means she won't be around for another purification for at least a few hundred more years."

Another "P" faded away as Peace brushed it off with his wing. "I'll think on it, and speak with the others. Enjoy the rest of your ascent."

"I didn't expect you to be here for so long."

"You know as well as I that purification is about thoughts as well as actions," Celestia replied as she completed another lap around the mountain. "Besides, I really don't get enough exercise, and the time stop on this place means that I don't have to take time out of my schedule for it." She was running fast enough that she zipped past the other souls unable to keep up with her, becoming blurs as she focused her attention on her conversational partner.

The Angel of Zeal laughed as she flew alongside her. "Well, I suppose we don't get to spend enough time together during your visits. Maybe with your new student taking over, you can have more chances to laze around so we can hang out more."

Despite her heavy breathing, Celestia still managed a mock gasp. "An angel encouraging me to sin? How scandalous!"

Zeal did a little pirouette in the air as she pouted at Celestia. "Hey, it's okay if it's proactive Sloth!"

Celestia raised an eyebrow. "Does that even exist?"

"Well, you can be the first to find out!" Zeal giggled as they reached the end of the Terrace. "After all, it's all about intent, right?" She hopped over Celestia with a big "whoop!" and danced around to face her again. "Maybe if you slow down for a friend then it's not a sin!"

"But if I'm doing it for the right reasons, then I wouldn't need to spend more time here, right?" Oh, how delightful it was to send Zeal into a confused tizzy with her words. For most mortals, even glancing at one of the angels was impossible, and they would be blinded by their radiance — which is to say, they were really, really bright.

For a pony who had stared down the Sun itself into submission, though, it was child's play to see through their brilliance and observe their true forms. Underneath their cloak of light, the angels were really just normal ponies with wings and a horn, like her.

And like a normal pony, Zeal looked positively adorable as she furrowed her brows in careful thought, even as her wings continued to keep her in constant motion. "Okay, how about you take some more vacations to give your new princess a chance to practice, and then spend all that time lazing around?"

"That sounds like a command I would be happy to follow." Celestia came to a stop as they reached the end of the terrace, the whole world coming back into focus and revealing that somepony had drawn racetrack lines on the floor of the terrace. Glancing at the playful Angel of Zeal, she could guess as to who had tried to give this otherwise-plain terrace a bit of zest.

"Okay, looks like you're finally free of Sloth." With an overly-elaborate and wholly-unnecessary backflip, the angel in question alighted before Celestia and brushed away the fourth "P" from her forehead. "Oh, and since I'm the Angel of Zeal and stuff, I should probably tell you to spend more time with that former student of yours instead of spending all your time ruling the country. Don't want to waste a moment of time with her, right?"

Celestia nodded. "Sage advice, Zeal. Perhaps I should think more on living life to the fullest with her. She certainly has gained a passion for living that rivals her love of books."

"Thatta girl. Now get going and knock 'em dead!" Completely oblivious to the irony of her words, The Angel of Zeal flashed one last grin at Celestia before diving backward off the mountain, whooping and hollering as she soared among the clouds.

"You know, I tried to give her a castle when she first ascended? Offered to give her all the resources she would need to have one built in Ponyville. But she just told me she was happy in her tree library, and she barely even used her royal stipend for anything except donations. The Royal Accountant spent weeks trying to prove that she was embezzling the money because he just couldn't believe a pony could be that selfless."

With her face pressed against the ground, Celestia couldn't turn to face her conversation partner and see his reaction, but she heard him hum appreciatively.

"I'm glad you found someone to spend time with, princess. I still regret that I spent more time pursuing fame and fortune than being your friend."

"Don't beat yourself up over it, Stat. I should have done more to connect with you as well, but I was too busy wallowing in my own misery."

Silver Status shifted, the crunching of gravel echoing in Celestia's ears. "You had a lot on your plate after The Banishment."

"And you did as well. Please, Stat, forgive yourself and move on. Don't let me be the reason you're still trapped here."

"I— okay." As Status spoke, the ground rumbled, and the tremors of the incoming earthquake shook Celestia to her soul. She pressed herself closer into the ground to anchor herself as her whole body vibrated along with the earth.

Distantly, she heard Status' voice through the cacophony.

"Thank you."

The rumbling stopped, and there was silence. Celestia relaxed and continued to lie with her face to the ground.

Some time later, she heard a new voice speak. "I see you've helped another soul continue on his journey. I guess you can take the mare away from the princesshood, but you can't take the princesshood out of the mare."

"It's what I do." Celestia shrugged as she allowed herself to rise. "How have you been, Moddy? I didn't see you on my way in."

The Angel of Moderation shrugged as he wiped the next "P" from Celestia's brow. "Not all of us are on vacation, Celestia. There was, unfortunately, a luxury zeppelin crash during your stay here, and I've had to deal with a rather large influx of rich ponies who tried to temper their Avarice with good deeds but need some help achieving their inner balance."

"Oh, that's terrible." Celestia's heart ached as she walked towards the exit of the fifth Terrace. "I hope Twilight is dealing with it okay."

"Your student is showing admirable strength of character," Moderation said. "She grieves though she didn't know any of the ponies on board, and still she held strong as she expressed her condolences."

"That's good to hear." Celestia bowed her head. "Thank you, Moddy, and I'm sorry we didn't get to spend much time together this round."

"We have eternity, Celestia. Shall I see you again in a thousand years?"

"I wouldn't miss it for the world."

"I hate you."

"You say that every time, Celestia."

"I mean it this time, Tempy." Celestia moaned as she reached for the juicy-looking peach hanging in front of her, only to have it vanish when her hoof made contact with the succulent fruit. "Why are you doing this to me?"

The Angel of Temperance rolled her eyes as she walked towards her, passing through the illusory branches of the false tree resting next to Celestia. "Are we really going to do this? You actually need less purification for your Gluttony this time. I guess you found something else besides pastries to fill the void in your heart?"

The tortured act dropped as Celestia allowed herself a sincere smile. "I did. Good friends and beloved family are far better than any cake." She paused, thinking. "Although, having cake with friends is even better. Can we get some cake?" She batted uselessly at the tantalizing phantom fruits hanging in front of her.

"I know you're playing, Celestia." Temperance raised a wing and wiped off the penultimate "P." "But if you wish, we can partake in a light meal before you continue your ascent." She gestured towards the end of the terrace, where a small picnic table had been set out amongst the ethereal trees that surrounded the terrace and turned it into a forest of mirages.

Celestia perked up as she saw bread and fruits and a glass of juice on the table. "Can we have cake too?"

Temperance shook her head. "No cake."

"Aww, you're no fun."

"Hey, Chastity! Long time no see! How's it going?"

Celestia's cheery greeting fell on deaf ears as she entered the final Terrace. The Angel of Chastity was waiting for her, standing imperiously in front of a pair of braziers that burned with holy fire. She frowned, and Celestia finally understood how her students felt when she was disappointed with them.

"I don't appreciate your deception, Celestia." Tongues of flame lapped at both their hooves as Chastity spoke, but neither alicorn nor angel flinched at them.

The easy smile on Celestia's muzzle turned brittle. "Well, I don't think Moddy and Tempy minded me spending some extra time with them. They can get awfully lonely sometimes."

More fire swept around them, flowing down like a river that carried the souls of the penitent in their currents. Celestia was vaguely aware of them singing praises to Fidelity.

Chastity was not distracted by the spectacle. "You may have fooled the others, but I can see the true purpose of your visit in your heart."

"I—" Celestia tried to think up another excuse, but Chastity cut her off with a sharp look.

"You came here early, not because you had some time off, but because you wished to rid yourself of the conflict in your heart."

She should have known better than to try to fool the angels. "Please, Chastity," Celestia begged, her voice dropping to a whisper that was barely heard above the crackling of the flames. "I can't— I can't go on like this. These thoughts haunt me every day and every night, and I can find no rest from them. Please, you must free me from my sin! It is your duty to purify me!" She dropped to her knees before Chastity, bowing her head in a desperate plea.

The angel remained impassive. "I do have a duty, old friend." Chastity's wing whipped across Celestia's head, removing the final "P." "You have never been guilty of the sin of Lust."

"B-But, these desires fester within me!" Celestia protested, pressing a hoof against her brow and feeling it clean once again, despite her corruption within. "How can I be free of Lust when I can't stop thinking about her?"

"Do not insult me." Despite her words, Chastity's glare softened. "You know as well as I that Chastity is not Celibacy. Desire born from Love is not evil."

"I am not worthy of her." Celestia stood and met the angel's gaze with one of shame. "And as long as I want... that, from her, I can't deal fairly with her."

"As I said, I tire of your lies." Chastity reared up in front of Celestia, towering over her as she spoke with the voice of the Ancients. "In coming here, you have proven yourself humble, generous, tranquil, zealous, moderate, temperate, and chaste. Your only fault, now, is fear. Fear which you must overcome lest you fall into Sin as many others have."

"No, I cannot allow myself to fall for this temptation." Even as she said the words, Celestia knew they were hollow.

"Then step through the flames," Chastity said. "Step through the Wall of Fire and be Cleansed of your Lust."

Celestia glanced at the end of the Terrace, where there was indeed a wall of flame blocking her ascent to the final level. She spread her wings and held her head high, every inch the untouchable princess she was meant to be.

She walked over to the fire and took a deep breath before stepping through, bracing herself for the cleansing of her soul that would take place.

Nothing happened.

As she exited on the other side completely unchanged, she saw Chastity standing there smirking at her. "Congratulations," she said snidely. "You have proven yourself free of improper Lust."

"No," Celestia whispered. "Please, no."

"Your path is clear now," Chastity said as she walked away. "I'll see you again in a thousand years."

Celestia looked up at the stars as she approached the banks of the Lethean River.

"Beautiful, isn't it? Your sister has done a fine job this night."

"Mighty Hilt." Celestia greeted the mare who had appeared beside her. "My sister has indeed invigorated the night sky since her return. I was always a poor artist."

"So you were." Mighty joined Celestia at gazing upwards as they enjoyed the beauty of Paradise, their hooves crunching against the soft grass beneath them. "You know the river won't wash away your desire for Twilight, right?"

Celestia sighed. "I was so sure that this place would be a cure for the thoughts that had been plaguing me. It couldn't possibly be right to desire my own student, could it?"

"Former student," Mighty corrected. "She's a princess now, one who stands equal to you."

"Still, the point remains, doesn't it?" Celestia stared into the calm waters, not yet ready to step inside its purifying stream. "Though, I guess since the little fire bath down there didn't do anything to me then that means it's perfectly fine for me to ask Twilight out on a date."

"That's not how it works and you know it," Mighty admonished. "The Terraces only purify those desires and traits born of selfishness and corruption. Even if your love for Twilight is true and rooted in a desire for her happiness, there is still no guarantee that your relationship will work out, or that it will not lead to ruin one day." The thought terrified her, set her heart beating wildly with dread, but she couldn't help but feel excited at the prospect as well.

"Us immortals have a really bad habit of not being able to give clean answers, huh?" Celestia smiled wryly as she spoke.

"Where's the fun in that?" Mighty shot back with her own smirk. In the distance, a griffon pulled a cart towards the top of the mountain. She smiled at him before returning her attention to Celestia. "So, what are you going to do once you are born anew and pure?"

Celestia shook her head. "I have no idea. The Ascent hasn't given me any more clarity of mind than I had when I started this journey."

"Are you sure?" Mighty asked. "Think of your journey and what you've learned of love."

There was a pause as Celestia considered her answer. "I've learned that love is generous, and humble, and gentle, and zealous, and many other qualities that Twilight possesses. And that... I possess as well. I am worthy of giving love. I am worthy of being loved." Her soul still roiled with uncertainty as she spoke those words, but something within her felt that they were somehow ineffably right. "Maybe it'll all blow up in my face one day, but I'd be a massive hypocrite if I didn't take that leap of faith."

"Very good," Mighty said. "You are on your way towards the greatest journey you will ever take." She gestured towards the river once again. "So, are you ready to take the next step in your new life? To be purified and reborn again as a being of love, free from sin?"

"I am." Resolve hardening, Celestia walked towards the river. "Thank you, Mighty. I'll see you in a thousand years."

"Friends should not be parted for so long," Mighty replied. "Invite me to your wedding, and I shall attend, along with the other angels."

"And Gatekeeper too?" Her hooves were touching the water now. Celestia could feel the drowsiness of the Renewal begin to invade her mind.

Mighty nodded. "And Gatekeeper too. I'll even drag the Incorruptible One over. Maybe you can finally convince him to make the climb."

"I'll do my best." The waters tickled her barrel, and Celestia felt true peace for the first time in nearly a millennium. "Goodbye, Mighty. I can't wait for you to meet Twilight."

"I look forward to it. Fare thee well, Celestia. May flights of angels sing thee to thy rest."

Celestia's head disappeared below the waves, and the world became nothing but love.