Do Pegasi Dream of Magic Clouds?
One day, Cozy woke up. She looked around, realizing this was not Grogar's lair. She remembered gathering the artifacts, defeating Starlight Glimmer. (Wait, she had defeated Starlight, the greatest mage of her generation? How? The memory wouldn't come.) She remembered Tartarus, but not a trial or being transported there. (And criminals always got trials! She remembered that from the plays she'd seen.) She remembered her cage, the tiny one next to Tirek. (But how had she gotten her meals? Or gone potty?) She'd made Tirek a friendship sculpture (with what?)
The tendrils of mist around her mind were fading, a deeper awareness coming. Then Grogar had teleported them (Grogar? From that storybook Grandpa had read to her? Didn't Grogar's voice sound like her grandpa's? And when Daddy had read to her the legend of Tirek, he'd made that growly voice that had made her squeal in fake fear). She'd met Chrysalis...everything was fading like the echoes of a far off dream.
Her eyes sprang completely open and she noted how soft the bed was. Four, white walls enclosed her, the severe whiteness mitigated by pictures of blue flowers decorating them. A hospital room, that's where she was. Was she sick?
The last clear memory she had was of gathering the artifacts. Then what? The door slid open and Starlight trotted inside, a smile spread across her face. "Good morning Cozy. Or closer to noon now." She sat across from her at the side of her bed, that comforting expression on her face. Cozy looked away, knowing that smile was fake. They all knew she was a monster now and they were going to lock her up in Tartarus cause that's where monsters belonged. Starlight pressed her cheek against Cozy's own. "Shhh, deep breaths, deep breaths. Calm down. Did you have a nightmare?"
Cozy stared up at the ceiling. "Are they going to send me to Tartarus now?"
Starlight gasped. "Cozy! That's awful! The princesses would never send a foal to Tartarus. Tartarus is for dangerous creatures." She booped her snout. "You are not a creature. If you did something wrong, the worst you'd get is community service or a paddling." She paused. "Why would you think that Cozy?"
Cozy fixed her gaze on a vase. "Golly gee, I don't know! Cause I tried to drain all the magic from Equestria?"
Starlight nodded. "Is that what you were trying to do? Twilight found you passed out in the catacombs. You don't-very few creatures-have the raw manna to cast a spell like that. You could have died. What were you thinking?"
Cozy studied the blue vase. "Gosh, I'm sorry. Pwease don't be mad at me." She pouted, pushing out her bottom lip, widening her eyes.
Starlight rolled her own. "That shtick's getting old, Young Filly. Why would you want to drain all the magic from Equestria? Tired of being able to sleep on clouds? Not enjoying the sun and moon rising?"
Cozy growled and drummed her back legs. "Don't make fun of me!"
Starlight chuckled. "A tantrum, Sweetheart? Filly, please. I'm the princess of tantrums." Cozy was silent. Starlight sighed. "Not going to lie. Misuse of magical artifacts could land you a long community service sentence and you can forget those friendship assistant privileges. Or you can explain what you were thinking." She shrugged. "Unless you like cleaning up the whole castle by yourself. Trust me, I didn't and I had my friends helping me."
Cozy cocked her head. "You got punished? For what?"
Starlight settled onto the bed. "Because I cast a mind control spell on my friends because I didn't understand how to make friends any other way." She shook her head. "They still helped me."
Cozy paused. "They still helped you? They weren't mad?"
"Oh they were peeved-do not repeat that word-but I did a bit of magic. I sincerely apologized. Has to be real, not fake."
Cozy shuffled a hoof. "I did it cause I was going to help everypony-everycreature-and they'd all want to be my friend and, um..." In the harsh light of searing sanity, the plan didn't make sense. What had she been trying to accomplish?"
"That's a little much just to make friends."
"Friendship is power."
"That it is. But you don't make friends by taking away what everyone needs to live."
Cozy turned her back. "Cause I'm a monster, a bad, terrible monster."
Starlight stroked her shoulder. "Don't say that about yourself. You're a filly who made a mistake."
"I'm so bad I made my daddy leave me."
Starlight's breath caught in her throat. "Cozy, parents are supposed to stay with their children. Tell me what happened."
Cozy lapsed into an eerie silence, broken suddenly by a keening wail, Cozy throwing her face into the pillow and unabashedly weeping. Starlight wrapped her up in an embrace, Cozy still turned away from her. "Listen, this isn't about punishment. I want to help you, but I can't help you if you won't tell me what's wrong."
Cozy sniffled. "What would have happened if I had done it?"
Starlight held her a little tighter. "You'd have been sent to a special sort of hospital where they would try to figure out why you'd done it and how to help you not do it again."
"You mean a nuthouse."
"That's not a nice word, Cozy."
Cozy snorted. "I'm not a nice filly. Don't they clip your wings at those places?"
Starlight caressed her mane. "Sometimes they have to. It's painless and the feathers grow back." She continued running her hoof down Cozy's curls watching Cozy's shoulders relax. "Ponies and other creatures can get sick in their mind and that sickness can make them try to hurt someone or themselves so they can't be allowed out. You can keep a Pegasus locked up, but that just makes the sickness worse so they at least need to be allowed outside. Most of them have enclosures, but a very sick Pegasus might try to bash themselves against it. Nopony's ever found a better way."
Cozy shifted. "You think I'm crazy."
"I think you're hurting and and you're acting out because you think it will make the pain disappear."
Cozy nestled into Starlight's stomach. "I think I'm sick and that's why Daddy..."She broke off into sobs.
Starlight nickered, rested her chin on Cozy's head. "Go on, you can tell me." She nickered again, a way of saying "you're safe."
Her cries tapered off. "I broke a vase once. I knew not to throw balls in the house so Mommy yelled at me and sent me to bed early."
Starlight waited for her to continue, occasionally stroking her head. Cozy wiped at her eyes with a brush of a feather. "Daddy came home and I heard him yelling then Mommy yelled at him. Then he left and..." She whimpered. "It's because I broke the vase. That's why Daddy left."
Starlight slowed the stroking while Cozy turned around to face her, her cheeks awash in tears which Starlight licked away. "Is that why you wanted all that power? So no one would ever leave you again?"
Cozy drew away. "That's dumb. You're dumb."
Starlight pulled her close. Cozy struggled, but then gave in to the affection. "You're right. I am a dumb Pony and I've done dumb things-like try to get rid of Cutie Marks cause my best friend moved away. But we all do dumb things. Look, you're daddy leaving wasn't your fault."
Cozy shook her head against Starlight's chest. "Then how come Mommy won't talk to me anymore?"
"What do you mean?"
"W-when I go home..." She shuddered. "Mommy doesn't talk to me. She just sits on that...that damned couch drinking from her bottles."
Starlight closed her eyes. "Maybe she's sad because your daddy left."
Cozy looked up at her. "She's mad at me. She knows it was my fault."
Starlight lifted Cozy's chin. "I want you to listen to me, Cozy. Listen to me good. Daddies and mommies are supposed to stay with their children. Trust me, I did things worse than breaking the occasional vase and my daddy never left me."
She buried her head into Starlight's fur. "Th-then why? It must have been me, why else..?"
"I don't know Cozy, you'd have to ask him. They fought a lot?"
"Yeah."
"Maybe he was tired of fighting. Sometimes Ponies can be..." She paused, struggling for a word. "Sometimes Ponies get scared and then they run."
Cozy shuffled, flapping her wings. "I'm hungry."
Starlight allowed her to go and she hopped down onto the ground, Starlight striding off of the bed after her. "Cozy? I want you to come and talk to me every day. I'll schedule you in for one-o'clock right after lunch. Can you do that for me?"
Cozy bounded towards the door propelled either by her stomach or her desire to flee from the conversation. She pushed the door open and crossed into the School of Friendship's hallway, nearly bouncing right into Twilight who suddenly swept her into a hug. "Cozy! You're alright!" Cozy leaned into her. After a while, Twilight released her from the embrace. "I don't know what I'd do without my little friendship assistant." Her expression turned more serious. "However, I'm afraid I'm going to have to take away your archive privileges. You're no longer allowed down there by yourself. What were you trying to do anyway?"
The filly hesitated. "I...I'm not sure. It made sense at the time, but now I can't remember. Golly, I'm sorry for worrying you. I just..." She rubbed her forehead, pain splitting her skull.
Twilight frowned, glanced at Starlight.
Starlight shook her head. "Counselor confidentiality, but she has mandatory counseling sessions with me."
She nodded. "I see. Well, if you ever feel anything jogging your memory you can tell me. You also have a three page essay on the importance of caring for magical artifacts properly."
Cozy looked down. "I understand. Double space?"
"Single space." She nuzzled her again. "I am glad you're alright."
Cozy reciprocated the nuzzle. "I sure am hungry."
"I imagine you are, but we're going to run a few tests just to make you're not still hurt anywhere." Twilight patted her back. "Why don't you go get some breakfast?"
Cozy nodded and scampered away towards the breakfast hall. Twilight turned her attention to Starlight. "How worried should I be about her?"
"Worried." Starlight trotted alongside her as they made their way to the headmare's office. Twilight opened the door, sat down at her desk. Starlight took a seat in the brown chair across from Twilight. "She has severe issues. I won't tell you why she was using the artifacts-that'd break her trust in me."
"That's well within your rights as counselor and I won't make you tell me. But what's going on with her?"
Starlight sighed, leaning back in her chair. "Her dad left her and her mom is probably an alcoholic. Cozy blames herself for the divorce. Thinks her dad left because she broke a vase-you know that thing that every kid in the world does at some point." Her voice shook. "She thinks she's a monster, Twilight. She dreamed she was in Tartarus."
Twilight bit her lip. "No wonder she's always trying so hard. So no one will leave her again if she does something wrong, but this is a pretty big slip-up. I guess when she does misbehave she goes all out. I do hope she tells me what she was up to. I imagine she's afraid of how I'll react. Won't you let her know I just want to know so I can understand what was going on? So I can help her?"
"Will do, but right now it's all about gaining her trust. Any luck contacting her parents?"
"Her mom is a drunk. She's actually in jail right now, beat someone up at the bar. Multiple witnesses say she initiated a fight. She'll be out once she can pay the fine-or at least part of it. Her dad's whereabouts are unknown."
Starlight rubbed her temples. "Well then. Looks like that kid just has us."
Twilight reached over, grasped her hoof. "We're in this together. We can do it."
Starlight squeezed back, smiled at her mentor. "At least we're here for her. That's the most important part."
The door opened with a creak and Cozy peeked her head in. "Miss Starlight?"
Both mares ushered the filly inside. Suddenly Cozy rushed to Starlight, throwing her forelegs around her. Starlight picked her up in her lap, held her. "Something wrong?"
"N-no. Just, thank you." She leaned into her. "Thank you for listening."
Starlight patted her back. "We're here for you Cozy. Everything's going to be alright."
Author's Note
Because School Raze was stupid and made no sense.
ALSO COZY IS A CHILD YOU HEARTLESS BASTARDS. TROUBLED CHILDREN BELONG IN JUVIE OR A PSYCHE WARD, NOT IN A TINY CAGE IN A HOLE IN THE GROUND.
