The Vivarium Community Theater presents:

Starlight Over Detrot:
Detective Hard Boiled’s raging hard Crusade of Justice

A six act saga
Co-written by Swift Cuddles and Sweet “Taxi” Shine
Directed by Mistress Stella

STARRING:
Scarlet Petals, as Detective Hard “Hardy” Boiled
Sweet “Taxi” Shine, as herself
Swift Cuddles, as herself
Slip Stitch (M.D., P.hD, ADHD), as Limerence Tome

GUEST STARRING:
Mistress Zeta
Bake & Boil Tortellini
Tourniquet
Hard Boiled “Bones” Sr

See the play Detective Hard Boiled himself calls:“A good effort? Coat’s a bit too short though, my gun harness doesn’t ride so high either. And where’s my shirt and tie? ...the ‘Crusader’ is his what?!”

“Ten out of ten, would definitely learn to pole dance with reins slathered in dragon scale oil for again. I already got an idea for a prequel, with his ex-partner...completely true I tell ya-” ~ Sweet “Taxi” Shine

“-set Hardy on fire, wanted to make me his broodmare for Biters, and so many other things I can’t even begin to describe. I wish the real Broadside ended up in the same way though. The Tortellini twins did great! But with maybe a bit too much, uh, enthusiasm?” ~ Swift Cuddles

“A complete fantasy. Though if the real Hard Boiled was as...charismatic, perhaps he would have died much less often.” ~ Limerence Tome, Archivist

“-just because he ‘owns my body’ in terms of owning the stick my soul is stuck in doesn’t mean I call him ‘daddy’!” ~ Zefu Tome, totally calls his brother ‘daddy’

“Pure gold. I would gladly tie Hardy to a chair just to make him suffer through this. Better than my carrot peeler idea.” ~ Iris Jade, ex Chief of police

“You think the kid would be in charge through all of that? Ha! Not in my experience. Wouldn’t squeal quite so girlishly, though, if you know what I mean? Oh well.” ~ Unknown.

Author's Note

"Undeniably enthusiastic, I'll grant you that. But is the dialogue meant to come across so… sexually charged?"

If that quote rings bells, you'll definitely get where the joke of this is coming from. I mean, it can't be porn all the time, now can it...?