How to Improve Your Chances of Being a Mildly Popular Author

This guide is basically me being satirical and an ass. It will have good advice though.

How to Improve Your Chances of Being a Mildly Popular Author: First Impressions.

Step 1: How to Properly do a Title.

Lets call our mock story, my amazing adventures in equestria where i beat all the bad guys and make the mane six fall in love with me.

I know, amazing title, right?

Now if you saw that title, beyond the obvious reason, you would not even look at that story. Why? Because the author immediately comes off as stupid and incompetent with the most basic of writing rules. If you want to look competent and pique people's' interest, capitalize shit.

MY AMAZING- No, fucking stop right there.

You always capitalize the first letter of the first word and you also capitalize all the important words in a title. These usually consist of words more then three letters long. So what you should of had for your title is, My Amazing Adventures in Equestria.

That's it, the rest should be part of your description. Now, you look to be somewhat literate.

Step 2: The Description and You.

where i beat all the bad guys and make the mane six fall in love with me. i do this by. bashing their heads in with my really big penis. named man meat. this it my first. story so be nice. also what will happen?

If you can't be bothered to use capitalization and grammar 10-fucking-1, that everyone learned in grade school, why should we even suspect for a moment you did it right in the story?

Joe Everyhuman beats up all the bad guys, and the Mane Six fall madly in love with him. He does this with his trusty over-sized penis, Man Meat.

Now, I know you're wondering, what happened to the rest, and why did you change it? First of, you're describing the damn story, not telling us about your writing career. If you want people to know about that, put it in the comments section located under the fic. Questions, are cliche, and not the good, classic kind of cliche. They can be pulled off well, but usually they're just useless and dumb. I changed it to make it sound more exciting, it needs to hook whoever glances at it and drag them into the story by interesting them. This can be done through exciting them, intriguing them, or even making them wonder, why the fuck does this sound awesome?

Step 3: Cover Art.

Use it, and it better fucking represent the story well.

Step 4: Character Tags.

Wanderer D covered this already, but to reiterate, use them. Fics without character tags aren't even supposed to pass moderation. Somehow they do all the time, but they're not supposed to. People like knowing who's important to the story. Everyone likes seeing their favorite character, or characters, have a moment of glory.

Step 5: Genre Tags.

Use them, and use them right.

Do all this, and your fic will at least warrant some attention. Next time, we'll discuss formatting, and how not to make peoples eyes puke just from looking at it.