The End of Time

Chapters

Chapter 1 - How Long?
Chapter 2 - The Extraterrestrial Menace (but nopony knows that)
Chapter 3 - Introductions
Chapter 4 - Surprise
Chapter 5 - Busted
Chapter 6 - An Uneasy Alliance
Chapter 7 - Space Trip
Chapter 8 - No One Can Hear You Scream
Chapter 9 - Another Uneasy Alliance
Chapter 10 - Konfronting Kronos
Chapter 12 - Big Bad Duumvirate
Chapter 13 - Escape Plan
Chapter 14 - Running For It
Chapter 15 - Welcome to Korriban
Chapter 16 - An Unearthly Discovery
Chapter 17 - The Dude and The Doctor
Chapter 18 - The Tomb of Tulak Hord
Chapter 19 - An Unlikely Ally
Chapter 20 - Battle Royale
Chapter 21 - A Meeting of Two Evil Unicorns
Chapter 22 - One Reformed, One Not
Chapter 23 - Let The Operation Begin
Chapter 24 - What The Hell?
Chapter 25 - Geronimo!
Chapter 26 - Unstable Unicorns
Chapter 27 - Dead Poop's Back (Again)
Chapter 29 - Everyone Died. The End.
Chapter 11 - Wounds Of Future Past
Chapter 28 - And Now For Something Completely Different

Chapter 1 - How Long?

It's been a year since Laeyoon and his apprentice Jaesa have landed on this forsaken planet. It was meant to be an easy routine assignment: Land on the planet, negotiate with the rulers of the planet, kill them if they refuse to cooperate, and enslave the inhabitants when he has killed the rulers. It was always when, because Laeyoon was not the most patient of Sith Lords. Easy kriffing peasy! But even the greatest plans of womp rats and Sith Lords go horribly wrong. He and Jaesa have been hiding out in a hut in some sort of forest. The forest looked like a location that would be best described as Dagobah meets Dromund Kaas, more specifically, the parts of Dromund Kaas where some Sith temples were placed. And in the forest were creatures that appear to be some sort of sithspawn, with canines that are made out of wood and a big furry creature that had yellow eyes and a star-like texture on it's fur. And that's not even getting into one creature that wouldn't be out of place on Korriban: A mostly feline creature with a red bushy mane and what appeared to be bat wings on it's back. Laeyoon then looked at the fire in the centre of the hut and sighed. While he won't deny two of his reasons for taking this assignment was because he liked killing things and he wanted to rub it in Malgus' face, he can't help but wonder why he agreed to the task Darth Malgus has given him. He then thought back to when he was on the Imperial Fleet station intercepting a holocall from Darth Malgus.

"Lord Oude" Darth Malgus said "I wasn't expecting you to be interested in the negotiations between The Sith Empire and an equine race in the Unknown Regions. While they are primitive, their sensitivity in the Force will make them a great asset."

"I'm guessing the negotiations in question will be aggressive in nature," Laeyoon said. "After all, do you honestly think that a bunch of savages, force-sensitive or not, will be willing to work with us?"

"Well, they might," a mysterious voice said in the background of Malgus' end of the holocall. "After all, not only did a force-sensitive race with an affinity for controlling people agree to be a part of this wonderful empire, but I happen to be a part of the race of 'savages' that you are referring to."

Laeyoon noticed a horned equine with a slicked-back mane, a goatee and a pair of serpent-like eyes walk up next to Malgus. The equine also had some sort of symbol on his flank and he spoke with an accent that implied he was from one of the Core Worlds of the galaxy. Then again, Laeyoon has yet to meet anyone in the Empire that didn't have an accent that originated from one of the Core Worlds. Rather ironic that most of the Imperials have Core World accents, especially Coruscanti ones, when, as far as Laeyoon wais aware, most of the Core Worlds are under the control of the Republic. While Laeyoon could have continued pondering what accent the equine had, a better question was on his mind.

"Who the hell are you?" Laeyoon asked in a somewhat insensitive tone. While Laeyoon can be good company, tact wasn't really the first thing that's on his mind when talking to people.

"I am Kronos," the equine said, "And you are just the Sith I'm looking for."

Both Laeyoon and Malgus gave Kronos an odd look. While Laeyoon had no doubt in his abilities, Malgus was the one that, in spite of the mask, looked the most surprised. Then again, if there was one thing that Laeyoon was good at, it's being persistent. Even if his fellow Sith and Imperials would have to wait a very long time until they saw the results from Laeyoon's conquests, and that's not even getting into how he would sometimes skip battles for the sake of a lunch break. Although that last one probably hurt Laeyoon a lot more than it hurt the Empire's chances of taking down their enemies. Laeyoon looked back at Malgus.

"A surprise to be sure," Laeyoon said while smirking at Malgus. "But a welcome one. Your faith in me will be rewarded, Kronos."

"Excellent," Kronos said, his tone still saying the same as before. "I'm not sure about Lord Malgus but I can assure you I will be watching your career with great interest."

"Did you hear that, Malgus?" Laeyoon asked smugly. "My career is interesting to him."

"Perhaps it's because both of us are wondering how you're still standing despite reports claiming you have been on more than one occasion riddled with blaster bolts from mere thugs," Malgus said dryly. "There had also been at least one report of you clumsily falling down an elevator shaft as well."

It would be wise to point out that Laeyoon doesn't really like Malgus that much. You'd think with their similarities in that they are both Sith Warriors who have (or had in Malgus' case) twi'lek girlfriends and they were both chosen to be The Emperor's Wrath at certain points in time that they would be the best of friends. Even more so considering how Laeyoon is what most Imperials refer to as an alien, much to his frustration, and Malgus is known for being extremely tolerant for a Sith. Problem is, while Laeyoon is very courteous to his fellow Sith, (sardonic remarks notwithstanding), he despised the fact that Malgus was more feared and respected than him, especially among alien Imperials. Although Laeyoon considers himself and Malgus to be rivals, Malgus thinks nothing of Laeyoon's hatred of him.

"If I may butt in," Kronos said to break the ice between Malgus and Laeyoon "My sectoid forces are waiting on this station to pick Lord Oude and his apprentice up so they can help out with the potential war effort."

While Laeyoon knew that the negotiations between him and the princesses of this "Equestria" as they call it were going to be short, he really should have guessed from prior experience that they were going to kick his arse. In hindsight, perhaps he should have brung Pierce with him instead of Jaesa. Then again, there is not a chance in hell that he would even consider cuddling up to Pierce for the sake of warmth. While he could have easily tried taking on the princesses again, the most unusual thing happened before he got the chance: A horned ape thing with cloven hooves for feet was dancing and apparently absorbing everyone's abilities to use the Force. Must be some sort of dark art used by the Nighsisters of Dathomir. He ought to know, he was born and raised on Dathomir. He and his sectoid forces laid low after that and, once the competition was eliminated were they finally able to strike. Unfortunately, they vastly underestimated the possibility that one of the princesses' allies knows some sort of Sith alchemy that can inflate the sectoids' heads to a gargantuan proportion and cause them to float away. Not only that, but his lightsaber turned into an inflatable as well. He had to spend at least two months healing because he broke his legs from letting go of his lightsaber.

After enough thinking about the past, which was enough to fuel his already burning desire to kill every inhabitant on this planet, he decided to rest and hope the fire he set within the forest didn't go out. Given how he imagined the fire staying lit because of his rage, he need not worry about it snuffing out. However, when he tried to rest, he heard all sorts of noises coming from the distance. And not just any noises, but noises that sounded technological in nature, and explosive-sounding too. Since that the noises were disturbing his rest, he went to investigate, Force-choking any creatures that got in his way for he was so not in the mood to be dealing with them right now. As he walked out of the forest, he noticed a house with smoke and flashing lights coming out of it. And then an equine with a brown coat and a messy mane that was a darker shade of brown busted open the front door coughing and spluttering before collapsing to the floor. Laeyoon then walked closer to the equine. While it would be so easy to kill it just for the hell of it, he decided to be pragmatic and consider him an ally for now. Whether this new alliance would be temporary or permanent depends entirely on this equine's priorities. And as the equine woke up, he was face-to-face with Laeyoon crouching down at his once unconscious form.

"Hello there," Laeyoon said. "I am new to this world, and since that I have nothing I can use to call my allies for help, I was wondering if you could be of assistance."

Author's Note

Meet Laeyoon Oude, who is essentially Darth Maul if Darth Maul was kind of a loser.

I'm not kidding. You know when Malgus mentioned Laeyoon clumsily falling down an elevator shaft? That actually happened during one of my playthroughs of Star Wars: The Old Republic. Oh, did I mention Laeyoon is based on my player character from Star Wars: The Old Republic? I know it's a bit weird focusing on the Star Wars stuff now but if you knew anything from the previous entries in The Captain Goodking Saga (which you probably wouldn't unless you're familiar with me ever since I came onto this site) it's that it can be a bit random so a crossover with Star Wars and XCOM doesn't sound that far fetched.

Chapter 2 - The Extraterrestrial Menace (but nopony knows that)

The equine allowed Laeyoon to enter his home. Laeyoon stared in awe at all the technology within the equine's home, and especially noticing the abundance of clocks and electrical thingamajigs in the room. While some bits of it looked primitive by the standards of both the Republic and the Sith Empire, he was impressed that a member of a technologically challenged race could make stuff that wouldn't be out of place on somewhere like Raxus Prime (even though Raxus Prime was a junk planet). Then again, Dathomir was no Coruscant so he really shouldn't judge a race on their technological abilities.

"Did you make all of this?" Laeyoon asked in amazement, although it was hard to notice his amazement since his tone didn't change that much.

"Why yes indeed, my otherworldly guest. I have been studying science my whole life, finding new ways to revolutionize the lives of pegasi and Earth ponies. But of course, I can't leave out the unicorns so I have invented this device that can easily help them if they ever want to become Time-Turners!"

As the equine picked up a device from the table right next to him, Laeyoon looked away and burped before looking back at this eccentric pony as he held the device. It was mainly red and white and had wires of all sorts of colours sticking out of it, as well as some sort of communication device. Two communication devices, come to think of it.

"It's a name in progress but I call it the 'Timey-Wimey detector'!" the equine shouted excitedly. "It's a device makes notifies the user with a sound whenever a temporal anomaly appears, or to the laypony, it goes ding when there's stuff."

"Impressive," Laeyoon said, trying to sound as courteous as possible. "Most impressive. Maybe not as impressive as the other stuff in this room but still pretty impressive."

"Great wickering stallions! I have been telling you about my accomplishments and yet I've never given you my name! Call me Doctor Whooves!"

"Given the naming conventions of this system, I wouldn't be surprised if your first name really was 'Doctor'," Laeyoon deadpanned. "Now that you have introduced yourself to me, I am Lord Laeyoon Oude of the Sith Empire. I am a zabrak from the planet Dathomir. The Sith saw I had great potential and I went from being a lowly Nightbrother to being enrolled in the Sith Academy."

Doctor Whooves' blanked out as he tried to process all of the new terms Laeyoon threw at him. "Who are these 'Sith' that you speak of?"

"An order that retains power through passion. And since love and friendship are very passionate things, I can assure you that the Sith Empire would be right up your alley as well as the rest of this world's inhabitants' collective alley."

Laeyoon obviously and deliberately neglected to tell Whooves that the Sith believe peace is a lie and that the princesses of this planet have no interest in negotiating with a tyrannical regime that takes pleasure in hurting those around them. He also neglected to tell him that the Sith have a habit of betraying one another, a habit that he thinks is a bit idiotic (and he's the kind of guy that tends to murder people on a whim). While he won't deny he has betrayed a few people, they were merely because it was a temporary alliance and the person he betrayed was associated with the Jedi, the Republic or Darth Baras (or they just annoyed him, like that grovelling little kiss-arse from when he first arrived to Dromund Kaas with Vette). And even though he hates getting betrayed himself, he's actually counting on Jaesa betraying him one of these days, even to the point of fantasizing about it while relaxing in a hot tub on Naboo drinking a glass of Sullustan wine. Nevertheless, depending on any possible corruption within this planet's ruling government and how gullible Whooves is, perhaps he can convince Whooves to join his side. Just like how he convinced Jaesa to give in to the dark side. After all, having the ability to feel other people's emotions as well as their true nature and yet being forced to repress hers must have been torture for Jaesa. All he did was set her free. It was then that he had an idea.

"These unicorns, pegasi and Earth ponies you speak of. What exactly are they?"

"Interesting question! They are the various kinds of ponies that exist in Equestria, with me being an Earth pony for I have no wings or a horn but I do have a mean buck! And as for the unicorns, they are the ones with swirly but majestic horns on their heads and pegasi are the ones with wings. But they are nothing in comparison to the greatest pony of all! The race of pony that has the magical potential of a unicorn, the flight of a pegasus and the strength on an Earth pony. The alicorn!"

"Ah, so you rule based on race then? I understand."

"Well, not exactly. The unicorns are the ones that can use all sorts of magic, given practice of course. The pegasi are in charge of the weather, and the Earth ponies specialize in agriculture and construction. And as far as I can tell, all the alicorns are princesses."

"So your society has a caste system then?"

"Not exactly. Everyone is treated equally and I have been working on a cutting ed-"

"Mate, I grew up having to protect a wrinkly old Nightsister's arse because I was born with horns, a spear and a pair of choobies. Until the Sith came, I wasn't even allowed to practice the same magic as the Nightsisters. So when I tell you that what you have is a caste system, that means you have a caste kriffing system!"

Whooves looked at the livid expression on Laeyoon's face. Being unfamiliar with the customs of Laeyoon's home, he must have accidentally struck a nerve. Maybe if the extraterrestrial allowed him to finish his sentence, he might have had more of an understanding of how Whooves' research can benefit all of ponykind. Thankfully, he knew how to remedy this (or at least he thought he knew).

"You appear to be confused, perhaps I should introduce you to one of the princesses so they can help explain things better to you."

"I wouldn't recommend that. They might consider my appearance to be menacing and they'll think I'm some sort of monster."

While Laeyoon really doesn't like speciesism, courtesy of having to put up with enough of it from those bloody humans within the Sith Empire, (except ironically for Darth Malgus, ironically), he won't deny that there's something satisfying from being called a monster. Even more so in that people don't call him that because of his appearance. They call him that because at the end of the day, he's a psychopathic attack dog for the Sith and anyone else to show him who to kill and who will be next. Suddenly, Whooves had another idea.

"Try not to misinterpret this but have you ever considered going into the Redemption Class in Princess Twilight's School of Friendship. I'm not saying that because I think you're evil. Far from it! I thought I might suggest it because it's filled with characters that look intimidating but are actually gentle souls at heart. Although I won't deny some of the fellows there have done some bad things but at least they're willing to give friendship a try."

Laeyoon tried not to laugh at the idea of a "Redemption Class". In the empire, what the equines called "redemption" they call "treason". And treason is usually punishable by death. Nevertheless, he decided to play along in the hopes of gaining Whooves' trust.

"I suppose I shall visit this 'Redemption Class'. Maybe it might help me understand this culture a bit more. But first, I'm going to need my beauty rest."

Whooves then quickly showed Laeyoon to his bedroom. It had blue walls and a ceiling painted like they were the stars in the sky. There were also posters of clocks and other timekeeping devices littered throughout the bedroom. Whooves then pulled out a sleeping bag and a pillow from under the bed and handed them over to Laeyoon.

"Hopefully, this will be comfortable enough for you."

"Feels comfortable enough."

Laeyoon and Whooves then layed down on the floor and in the bed respectively. Laeyoon also took his clothes off and snuggled into the sleeping bag and rested his head on the pillow. While Laeyoon's idea of comfort would be resting on his bed fantasizing about Vette in a golden bikini, he figured this was more of an improvement than being stuck in a forest barely getting any sleep out of fear of any of the creatures in that forest trying to eat him. He hoped to himself that the inhabitants of this planet are unfamiliar with the concept of touching one's self.

Author's Note

Another difference between Laeyoon and Maul. Like me, Laeyoon is absolutely vulgar. Well, maybe not that vulgar but still something you'd expect from a lower or middle-class gent rather than a bloody Sith Lord.

Finally, we're getting somewhere! Even though it's only been two chapters but still. (sniffs in deeply like air was bag of cocaine) The plot THICKENS! :pinkiehappy:

Chapter 3 - Introductions

Night eventually became day and Laeyoon awakened from his well deserved rest. He looked around the bedroom and noticed Doctor Whooves was still sound asleep on the other side of the room. He sensed that he had forgotten something, trying to remember what it was. He then had a sudden realization.

"Oh kriff, Jaesa!"

He didn't have enough time to put his clothes back on before belting out of the door and running back into the forest to fetch his apprentice. When he ran back towards the hut he and Jaesa were sleeping in, he saw Jaesa standing about surrounded by dead creatures of all sorts, most of them struck down by her lightsaber. Jaesa then noticed her master's nude form and can't help but be amused at how mediocre his physique was. While his legs were the kind most male sentients could only dream of, though given the amount of walking he does, that's barely a surprise, everything else was a disappointment in the mediocrity of it, especially his...lightsaber and thermal detonators, for lack of better words. She honestly thought his lightsaber was bigger when they first gave into their passion.

"Ah good, you're still alive," Laeyoon said, oblivious to how Jaesa was staring at him. He then inquired what Jaesa was looking at before noticing she was scanning him. He then looked down at his unmentionables and blushed ever so slightly.

"For the record, Jaesa, it's not actually that size," Laeyoon lied. "The only reason it looks smaller than it actually is is because of the cold weather on this planet. Yes, that's it. Besides, if it really was that size, you wouldn't have been satisfied with our first time together."

Laeyoon then noticed Whooves chasing after him.

"Ah thank goodness you're alri-oh my!"

"What do you mean 'oh my'?" Laeyoon inquired in an annoyed tone "Nearly everyone on this planet wears kriff all!"

Laeyoon then noticed Whooves studying Jaesa inquisitively, with Jaesa alternating between looking at Whooves and looking back at her master.

"Oh, yes, of course," Laeyoon said before gesturing his hands towards Whooves. "Where are my manners? Jaesa, this is Doctor Whooves. He's an inventor that specializes in things that are 'timey-wimey', for lack of better words."

Laeyoon then gestured towards Jaesa.

"Doctor Whooves, this is Jaesa," Laeyoon said. "She used to be associated with the Jedi Order, the enemy of the Sith, before realizing most of them were nothing more than holier-than-thou hypocrites. She also has the ability to sense other people's emotions and their true nature so try not to lie to her. Trust me, she nearly cut my choobies off when she found out I was still sleeping with Vette."

Laeyoon then noticed Whooves' attention was directed at the carnage Jaesa had inflicted on most of the creatures in the forest. Perhaps his exclamation of "oh my" was more to do with what Jaesa did.

"If you're wondering, Doctor," Laeyoon said, covering for his apprentice, "This had nothing to do with us. And if it did, it would have been out of self-defence."

While Laeyoon was fond of killing things, he took little pleasure in slaughtering wild animals. Though it was less of a moral thing and more that he got desensitized after killing so many things in self-defence. He, Jaesa and Whooves immediately walked back into Whooves' house so Laeyoon could put his clothes back on. After that, he took the good doctor's advice and entered the School of Friendship he was talking about. The school less like a school and more like a castle, with an emphasis on a violet colour scheme. Looking at it, Laeyoon decided that he prefered the Sith Academy on Korriban. As he entered inside the school, he noticed the corridor was filled with big columns. It would have reminded him of Korriban if it weren't for the fact that they were a bright violet in colour.

"Now where can I find this 'Redemption Class'?" Laeyoon asked, looking at Whooves' direction.

"Perhaps I can help you with that," a mysterious voice said. Laeyoon looked around to try and determine where that voice came from, only to come face-to-face with an abomination of mismatched body parts which had randomly spawned in front of him.

"Discord, Spirit of Chaos and formerly of Disharmony," the creature introduced itself, "My card." Discord flicked a card near Laeyoon's line of sight. Laeyoon caught the card and it looked like a sabacc playing card but with Discord as a symbol. As he stared at the card, he noticed Discord looking at him while stroking his beard.

"Do I know you?" both of them asked, before Discord made a log of wood spontaneously appear.

"Jinx touch wood no return!"

Both of them continued staring at one another inquisitively, then they both realized where they had seen each-other before: The Battle for Canterlot.

"Now I remember!" Discord announced. "You were one of those aliens tha-HUCK!"

But before Discord could finish his sentence, he felt a tight grip around his neck and noticed that he was floating slight off of the ground. He also noticed Laeyoon had one of his hands clenched into a fist.

"Hehehe," Laeyoon laughed. "May I have a moment with you in the nearest lavatory?"

Laeyoon then walked Discord over to the nearest lavatory, where he locked the door and released Discord from his grip.

"What are you doing here?!"

"What do you mean? I teach the Redemption Class," Discord said.

"What?!"

Discord then pulled out a megaphone from thin air and shouted directly into Laeyoon's ear. "I said I teach the Redemption Class!" If Laeyoon had his lightsaber, he would have plunged it directly into Discord's heart, (wherever that was). On the other hand, he could have just simply strangled Discord with his bare hands. Both of those were good choices, Laeyoon thought. Both fortunately and unfortunately for him, Discord had proven himself a valuable asset with that tidbit of information, which meant he could no longer kill him until later on.

"Since you know who I am, Discord, I figured I would come here so I can integrate myself better with the inhabitants."

To Laeyoon's credit, that wasn't even a lie. After all, what good would enslaving the inhabitants be if he killed them all in a bout of cross-cultural conflict?

"Splendid! I'll see you in class! Make sure you bring an apple!"

As Discord suddenly disappeared out of thin air, Laeyoon could only place his head on the toilet door in exasperation.

"Chaos take me," he muttered.

"If you insist."

Laeyoon then noticed that Discord has made a black hole appear right above him, which immediately sucked him up.

"Where I come from, that's a figure of speeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeech!"

The black hole spat Laeyoon out onto a seat in what appeared to be a classroom, with a semi-circle of elevated rows surrounding a podium in the centre. Then it spat out an apple onto one of Laeyoon's horns as well. Sitting next to Laeyoon was that ape creature who delayed his attack on the pony creatures of this world. Thise creature looked different, though, as he was wearing gold with dark blue threads covering the costume, and he was equipped with some goggles too, just for good measure. Laeyoon then immediately turned to a wall before banging his head on the table he was sitting at. It was at that this moment Laeyoon decided that he didn't want to live on this planet anymore.

Author's Note

Laeyoon's current situation in a nutshell:

Speaking of Hell, in the old Star Wars EU (which is now known as Legends) Chaos was another word for Hell. Just thought I should tell you that so you know what Laeyoon meant when he said "Chaos take me" is a figure of speech.

Also, sorry it took so long to upload this chapter. I was in London and my editor was busy with other stuff. I would find another editor so I would then have two editors but, let's face it, I doubt I'd find one as good as DmitriTheWriter. :twilightsmile:

Chapter 4 - Surprise

Laeyoon was still sitting at the table, silently despairing over his predicament, (with the occasional non-silent burp here and there). And as he did so, the ape creature decided to chat with him some more.

"So...I take it you're new here?" he asked.

"Yes," Laeyoon grumbled.

"Hey, don't worry about it," the ape creature said. "When I first came here, I had no interest in being a good guy. Didn't really go with my whole 'big powerful magic guy' thing at the time. So I decided to make some business with a guy that offered me almost unlimited power, tried to destroy the world, got betrayed by that guy, guy messed around with my head, turned me into a chicken and sent me to an alternate dimension, I literally beat myself up, twice, came back here, got revenge on the guy. Long story short, I realized being a good guy is better for business than being a bad guy."

"If you think that it's a wise idea to be a slave to people with a different moral alignment than you instead of slaughtering them all like animals, then you sir are an idiot."

"Hey, have you ever been stabbed in the back before?!" the ape said.

"Yes. Both figuratively and literally," Laeyoon said.

"Oh. Wow, real dark there, buddy."

"Well, I am a Dark Lord of the Sith." As if to demonstrate, Laeyoon began to lift a pencil into the air above his desk by waving his hand.

"Ooh, that's good. Maybe you can talk to Discord to see if you can keep that title. After all, being dark isn't inherently bad and he still gets to be called Discord. Then again, that's probably because it's his real name and it's probably not a great idea to give someone who could rip the fabric of reality a nickname he wouldn't like."

"That is correct!" Discord said while making his entrance into the classroom. He was wearing a black robe with a black wig and talking in a silly voice that made him sound like a duros trying to speak Basic for the first time, which is quite unusual since there are plenty of duros that speak Basic perfectly. As far as Laeyoon was concerned, Discord's outfit wouldn't look out of place in the Sith Academy. He wondered if he could convince Discord to ditch these equines and try and get a seat on the Dark Council, or better yet, trick him into becoming the Voice of the Emperor.

The day passed by at a snail's pace, and after many painful lessons, most of the pain being directed at the area of his legs, Laeyoon belted out of the school and ran to a secluded area to breathe a sigh of relief. Unfortunately, his relief was cut short when an equine creature pointed a sword directly at his throat. He was dressed in a red jumpsuit with a mask that had two dark circles around the eyes.

"You’ve gotta be kidding me!" Laeyoon said in the most exhausted tone possible.

"I wish I were, Darth Maul!" the jumpsuit pony replied.

"Who the hell is Darth Maul?!"

"Never mind, must have you confused with a different Sith Lord." the jumpsuit pony relieved his sword from Laeyoon's throat.

"If that's the case, good to know I'm not the only Nightbrother to make it out of that arse-pit Dathomir!"

"Yeah…" the jumpsuit pony once again pointed his sword at Laeyoon's throat, "Anyways, give me one good reason why I should cut your head off right now!"

"Is this because I came out of that stupid school?" Laeyoon asked.

"No, it's because you killed Qui-Gon Jinn. OF COURSE IT WAS BECAUSE YOU WERE WALKING OUT OF THAT SCHOOL!" the jumpsuit pony yelled.

"Ever heard of infiltration? While it's such an Imperial Agent thing to do, I had no choice because the rulers of this land will behead me if I tried anything," Laeyoon said.

"First of all, I don't think Celly and Lulu are the types that like to behead people. And second, they retired."

"Retired?" Laeyoon asked.

"Yes. They decided ruling the world was tiring so they retired."

"So there was no coup?"

"Nope."

"No revolution?"

"Nada."

"Not even the people trying to elect them out of power?"

"This isn't Naboo, Laeyoon. Royals actually stick around until they die and pass on their rule to their next of kin. And since those two are immortal, they probably don't have to worry about having an heir," the jumpsuit pony said.

"So they just decided to retire? Just like that?"

"Yep."

Laeyoon thought to himself while sinking in the revelation the equine has shared with him. Did the princesses really just abandon their people like that? They have the ability to move celestial bodies, and yet they just decided to up and kriff off? Then again, that was exactly what the Sith Emperor did after the Treaty of Coruscant, but at least he was still recognized as being in charge and he worked from the shadows up until that incident on Voss. Enslaving these ponies will be easier than Laeyoon could have ever dreamed.

"And who is in charge now?" Laeyoon asked.

"Why this lovely mare of course!" the jumpsuit pony said while pulling out a picture of a tall blue and red humanoid robot that looked like a semi-trailer truck with arms and legs, holding a large pistol in his hand. The jumpsuit pony in red immediately noticed what picture he was holding and put it back.

"Oops, that's the wrong leader! Although I'm not going to lie, it would be pretty cool if he was in charge of this planet. Anyways, this is the new leader of Equestria!"

He then pulled out a picture of a little pony with a purple coat, a pair of wings, a little horn, and a dark purple mane with a pink stripe through it. Laeyoon looked at the picture of what is apparently the new ruler of the planet and tried to hold in a sudden fit of giggles. He failed miserably.

"Ahahahahahaha! Are you kriffing serious?! This little pipsqueak is the ruler of the planet now!? She's smaller than the other princesses and they entrusted her to look after their kingdom in their retirement?! Oh, what a day! What a lovely day!"

"Oh, apparently, you're also going to be getting a delivery from Kronos," the jumpsuit pony said.

"Is it a new holocommunicator because my old one broke the same time my legs did when I decided to let go of my lightsaber, which had inexplicably turned into an inflatable. And that's not even mentioning the fact that the heads of our forces were suddenly inflated as well," Laeyoon said.

"Oh, I remember that! Big balloon heads! Haha! Hilarious!"

"Not when it's happening to us, it's not!. Any idea what the package is?" Laeyoon asked.

"Nope. When Kronos said you were getting a surprise, I thought that was merc-speak for 'cut his head off',." the jumpsuit pony scraped his forehoof with his sword for emphasis, dribbling blood onto the ground.

"Charming. I take it I will have to pick the delivery up at my hideout," Laeyoon said.

"Nope, you can pick it up at the post office. Well, I think you can anyways. Worth a shot!"

One trip to the post office later, where Laeyoon had to put up with an employee's annoying incompetence, he finally got his anonymous package. In the empire, such stupidity is punishable by death. It got even worse when he found out that the employee in question was associated with Doctor Whooves. Maybe he can convince Whooves to kill that employee should he ever permanently join forces with him. And when he walked back to Doctor Whooves' house, he opened the package and, surprise surprise, it was a new holocommunicator. He turned it on and there was Kronos, in all his holographic glory.

"It took you long enough," Laeyoon said in an annoyed tone.

"Well, what can I say?" Kronos said in the same courteous tone as always, "I honestly assumed you and your friends were dead. Tell me, which one do you think would be more embarrassing? Getting killed an Earth pony or getting killed by an ewok?"

"Kriff you!" Laeyoon shouted.

"Now now, there's no need to be like that. After all, I have wonderful news," Kronos said.

"Let me guess, the princesses have retired."

"The princesses have.....Okay, when and how?"

"The mercenary you hired told me when he was about to cut my head off for what looked like treason but was actually reconnaissance," Laeyoon said.

"Oh, you'll have to forgive Mercenary. He can be a bit trigger-happy. And stab-happy. And disintegration-happy. Kind of like you actually."

"I'm flattered," Laeyoon said in a dry tone.

"Anyways, where exactly are you right now?"

"I appear to be in some sort of laboratory. Do you know anyone named Doctor Whooves?"

"I do. What of him?" Kronos asked in a suspicious tone.

"Well, that's because I happen to be in his home right now. Certainly bigger on the inside, I assure you," Laeyoon said.

"Good. I have been meaning to catch up with Doctor anyways." Kronos pointed behind Laeyoon's head. "Speaking of which, you may want to turn to where I'm pointing."

Laeyoon obliged and noticed the door was open and Whooves has been listening to their conversation with a terrified look on his face. Laeyoon then glanced back at Kronos on the holocommunicator.

"There's an old Equestrian saying at times like this," Kronos said while looking at Whooves and then back to Laeyoon, "Speak of the draconequus and he shall appear".

The holocommunicator then shut off and Laeyoon looked back at Whooves before giving a nervous smile and putting a hand to one of his horns.

"I can explain."

Author's Note

Remember when I said Laeyoon Oude was Darth Maul if Darth Maul was kind of a loser? Who said I was kidding? :

https://clips.twitch.tv/BeautifulBoldAntelopeHeyGuys

https://clips.twitch.tv/AggressiveMoralCurryPipeHype

https://clips.twitch.tv/ImpartialTrappedPeafowlPraiseIt

https://clips.twitch.tv/KnottyFaithfulRadicchioKAPOW

https://clips.twitch.tv/FragileFamousMinkVoteNay

(Congratulations, now you get to hear Laeyoon in my sexy voice. :raritywink: )

Where was I? Oh yes. Finally, the plot moves onward! And if you're new to the Captain Goodking saga, then it should be pointed out that the stuff Goodking mentioned that made him turn over a new leaf did actually happen to him in the previous stories.

Also, the picture with Optimus Prime was DmitriTheWriter's idea. Good thing too because this won't be the last time we see our favourite metamorphizing machines.

Chapter 5 - Busted

In the depths of interstellar space, Kronos' command ship, the Entropy, floated through the void like some alien monolith. It looked like a big pendulum clock and the inside of the ship was made of see-through plastic with its gears and other components showing. Kronos, some of his guards, and his lackey-in-chief Cowardly Donkey made their way to a holding cell on the ship. The doors to the cell opened automatically, and inside chained to the walls was a yellow human with blue eyes, wavy bacon-like hair, a leather jacket, an orange top with a flaming ball at the centre, a purple skirt and a pair of studded leather boots. The human appeared disoriented and barely conscious. And right next to the human were steps. Kronos moved the steps in between himself and the human and stood upon the steps to face the human.

"Wakey wakey, Sunset!" Kronos said while getting ready to strike the human across the face with his hoof. Surprisingly, that made Sunset more conscious, if still a little groggy.

"The sectoids warmed her up for you, master!" Cowardly Donkey said in that same grating voice he always spoke in.

"They better have," Kronos replied in a courteous but annoyed tone. "We've been interrogating her for months and still managed to get nothing out of her. I'd say we'd be insane to continue, but it appears we have made some progress."

"I'm....n...never...gonna....tell..you...a...anything..." Sunset said weakly.

Kronos wasn't kidding when he said they were making progress with Sunset, as spending months being psychically tortured by Kronos, his sectoid forces, and even the Sith have made Sunset's cognitive abilities a little difficult for her and her mental defences weak. In addition, the Sith have more on one occasion entered her cell and physically tortured her with force lightning and choking in lieu of more sophisticated Force techniques such as Drain Knowledge, also known as the mind-probe.

"Here's what I'm going to do, Sunset," Kronos said while holding Sunset's head up and leaning in closer to her face, "Rather than rip the knowledge out of your mind, I'm going to try a different approach. The sectoids and the Sith may have tried everything from mind tricks to mind probes, but I think I would have far better luck than them with this new approach. Us unicorns have spells for almost everything. Ever heard of the Fiducia Compelus spell?"

Sunset's eyes widened with horror at that statement, something Kronos noticed and took a sadistic joy in.

"Ah, so you are familiar with it! Good. And since my forces and I have weakened your mind to the point where you can barely talk, I doubt I'd need to throw any other spells in there. While I'm not as skilled at controlling people in comparison to my time travel abilities and my mastery of disguises, I won't deny that I have a flair for getting in people's heads if I need to."

Kronos' horn glowed and then there was a flash. As the flash dissipated, Sunset's irises have shrunk into pinpricks as she blankly stared at Kronos with her eyes wide open. Kronos smiled at the result of the spell he cast.

"Now, let's try this again, shall we? You were in contact with one of the seven Seals of the Planets. You will tell me what the seal looked like, whether it said anything to you, and if it is in a specific location."

Meanwhile, in Equestria, Whooves was running to Princess Twilight's castle as quickly as his legs could carry him. Hot on his heels was Laeyoon, gasping for breath and loudly complaining about his legs. While Laeyoon could have easily silenced Whooves, he figured that Whooves was his only chance of getting off this rock. Whooves finally reached his destination and began immediately banging frantically on the castle door. Spike opened the door and noticed both Whooves and Laeyoon lying on the floor panting. Spike, being the little smart-aleck that he is, responded appropriately to the sight of a pony and an alien at the door:

"Let me guess, evil alien crash-landed on this planet and tricked us into helping him?"

"Oh, for the love of the emperor!" Laeyoon said in between breaths, "It's bad enough that the humans in the empire use that word but do I have to hear it from an inhabitant of this society as well?! I am not an alien! There! Are! No! Kriffing! ALIENS!!!!!!"

"He...prefers...the term...extraterrestrial," Whooves said, sounding even more exhausted than Laeyoon was.

"Thank you!" Laeyoon said, "Though...I'd...also accept prefer....sentient."

Laeyoon then immediately collapsed onto the floor. When he came to, he was tied up to a chair with Twilight and her friends all staring at him seriously.

"Oh, fantastic!" Laeyoon muttered under his breath, "I'm being held captive by these little equines. Between falling down an elevator shaft and this, I think this is probably the most humiliating event in my life! If Darth Malgus hears of this, I will never hear the bloody end of it."

"Alright, Mister Evil Alien Bad Guy!" a blue pegasus with a mane all the colours of the rainbow said in a brash tone, "What do you know of this Kronos guy we're hearing about?"

"Really?" Laeyoon said while slightly chuckling, "I happen to be a part of an organization that is far greater than either of you and you're asking me about the affairs of a rogue member of your race?"

"I don't think he knows anythin', sugarcube," said an orange pony said She had a blonde mane in a ponytail and was wearing a hat that wouldn't have been out of place on a smuggler's head. Given the pony's drawl, Laeyoon wouldn't be surprised if the pony actually was raised on somewhere one would suspect a smuggler to be from, like Corellia.

"Your friend is correct!" Laeyoon arrogantly announced, "I know kriff all about Kronos' plan. All he did was tell me and my forces to land here, negotiate with the princesses to join us, kill them if they refuse and then enslave the planet's inhabitants. Clearly, he never told us that the princesses and their forces can put up a decent fight and they had a pet that can inflate our weapons, as well as our forces' heads."

"My ears are burning," Discord said while making an entrance, "Although I wouldn't really call myself their pet. Honestly, I thought you of all people would know how much it hurts calling people names."

Discord then slithered around Laeyoon while holding onto his cheeks and slightly shaking his head. Laeyoon could only give Discord a glare filled with burning hatred in response to the teasing.

"And here I thought you were making an improvement in Redemption Class," Discord said while making a fainting motion and sounding as faux-heartbroken as possible, before moving his way towards Twilight and making a whispering motion.

"Although just between the two of us, he needs to take an anger management class too."

Laeyoon could only stare at his captors in a way that indicated that, if he managed to loosen his restraints, he will brutally murder everyone in the room with his bare hands. Then he had an idea.

"While I know nothing of Kronos' plan, I could easily lead you to him."

"Nice try!" the blue pegasus said back, "We all know that if you lead us to your boss, it would be a trap."

"My boss is the Sith Emperor. And if you were to face him, he would destroy you with just a thought. Or so I've heard anyways. Kronos is but a mere tool to the Sith Empire, and since I know how to dispose of tools once I am done with them, I can assure you I have no loyalty to Kronos."

Interestingly enough, despite having no loyalty to Kronos, Laeyoon had no intention of betraying him either. And even if he did, he knew the Sith Emperor would be very displeased with him once he got wind of it. Well, he assumed the Sith Emperor would be displeased with him. The Dark Council, on the other hand, would capture him and break every bone in his body for costing them a valuable asset. Since it would be a while before Whooves can build a fully-functional ship, assuming he even would, he had more than enough time to inform Kronos of his intentions.

Author's Note

You know, I'm really bummed out Kronos' forces didn't record themselves psychically torturing Sunset. That would have been nice to see.

Not that I have anything against Sunset, I just happen to be mildly sadistic. :twilightsmile:

But, regarding Kronos' use of the Fiducia Compelus spell on Sunset:

Chapter 6 - An Uneasy Alliance

Outside of Whooves' house, Whooves and Derpy were working on a spaceship for Laeyoon and any sectoid POWs, in other words, any aliens whose heads weren't inflated by Discord. For those worried about what happened to the sectoids with inflated heads, don't panic, they got better. Laeyoon was still busy being tied up and being observed by Twilight and her friends, with the blue pegasus flying around him. Then he remembered something and smiled, starting to chuckle a little bit.

"What's so funny?" the blue pegasus asked him.

"Oh nothing much. It's just that you think you've captured everyone that was part of the invasion."

"And what is that supposed to mean?"

"I have a friend of mine, more than a friend I should say, who I left in Whooves' house. And I bet she is just waiting for the opportunity for me to say the word and murder everyone."

Laeyoon then looked at the outside of Whooves' house to see if Jaesa is hiding behind one of the windows. While he can't see Jaesa anywhere, he can feel her presence. He then finally noticed Jaesa was standing behind the house and smirked at her while giving her a little wink.

"Jaesa, do the thing."

Jaesa complied with a smile, jumping high and quickly at the blue pegasus with an intent to impale her. But a flying blast of magic got in the way and knocked her off-balance. She got up and started swinging her lightsaber at Twilight, with Twilight blocking the swings and slashes with magical barriers. While Laeyoon could have kept on watching the spectacle, he had an itch that is rather difficult to scratch when one is tied up. And so, much to his dismay, he had to break up the fight between Twilight and Jaesa.

"Ahem!" he loudly announced, "Helping your master get free would be appreciated!"

"Oh, of course, master," Jaesa said while blushing a little. She then caught Twilight in a mini tornado of some sort, quickly jumped behind Laeyoon, and freed him from his restraints.

"Much better," Laeyoon said while stretching and then scratching his neck.

Twilight and her friends immediately surrounded the two Sith Lords and got into their battle stances, with Jaesa getting ready to attack them as well.

"Now now," Laeyoon said in a borderline mocking tone, "There's no need for us to stand on ceremony. I only just wanted scratch a little itch. Also, I'm bored and, as much as I hate using my legs, I also hate being tied to a chair with nothing to do."

And out of nowhere, Discord appeared, snapped his fingers and made a cage surrounding the two Sith Lords, taking Jaesa's lightsaber from her as well.

"I think you'll consider these new accommodations to be an improvement," Discord said coyly. While Laeyoon was annoyed about being caged up like an animal, he won't deny that it's better than being tied up. And with that, he sat down and thought about the many ways he can kill the little ponies in order to pass the time. As he thought to himself, his concentration was suddenly broken by his apprentice telling him something.

"Master, when we get back on the ship, I'd appreciate some time to talk," Jaesa said.

"Jaesa, we are being held captive by talking equines that look cuddly in appearance and would give ewoks a run for their credits in how they disguise their prowess with their cute appearance. Only difference being I have yet to see a force-sensitive ewok."

Thankfully for Laeyoon and Jaesa, the ponies had better things to do so they sent some royal guards to keep an eye on them. He waited until night-time when everyone would be feeling all tuckered out so he could flick his wrist and use the Force to bang the guards' heads against the metal bars of his cage. From there, he immediately used his holocommunicator to give Kronos a call.

Meanwhile, in the human world, Kronos was using Sunset Shimmer to lead him to where the Seal of Beauty is. Sunset and her friends had encountered the seal on the beach and were very surprised when the seal started talking to them in the most beautiful voice. The seal said it hid away in the human world because it was filled with such beautiful creatures that the seal would fit right in. Since Fluttershy was good with animals, it agreed to stay in Fluttershy's place.

Getting to Fluttershy's house was the easy part. The hard part came from finding out where the seal is inside the house. Luckily, Kronos planned for this. Since Sunset and Fluttershy were friends, surely it wouldn't hurt for friends to visit each other in the middle of the night to check on the seal, right? There was also a trash can to hide in so no-one would question what a unicorn was doing out on the street in the middle of the night. He didn't mind hiding in the trash can. In fact, it reminded him of some of his more exhilarating espionage missions over on the planet Cybertron. Kronos' horn lit up so he could telepathically contact Sunset and tell her what to say.

"Now then," Kronos telepathically commanded, "Knock on the door and if she or anyone else answers, repeat after me."

Sunset immediately complied and knocked on Fluttershy's front door. Luckily for Kronos, Fluttershy was busy feeding some bats so she should already have been awake and, hopefully for Kronos, close to the door to open it. Thankfully for Kronos, she swiftly answered the door. However, Fluttershy was quick to notice that something's a little off about Sunset.

"Um...Sunset? Are you okay?"

"Yes, I am alright," Sunset replied in a monotone voice, "I just thought I would visit here to make sure the seal is safe. Is there any chance that I could bor-curse it all!"

Fluttershy then noticed the trash can behind Sunset rattle about, courtesy of Kronos trying to answer his holocommunicator.

"What is it?" Kronos asked impatiently, to which Sunset mimicked in the same monotone as before, "Can't you see that I'm busy?"

"Is that how you act when I'm about to inform you of pleasant news? I'm surprised the empire could put up with you," Laeyoon said.

"Given how I have just located one of the seals, I doubt your news will be even better than mine."

"Fine then. I suppose you don't want me leading the princess and her allies to you where they would become very useful assets," Laeyoon said.

"And how do you intend on doing that?" Kronos asked.

"They are building a ship for me and I promised I would lead them to you when they are done."

"Yes, but they would be smart enough to realize it's a trap."

"Not if your forces put up a fight, they won't."

"Ah, I understand," Kronos said, "Make it look like your ship is something to attack, then once the princess and her friends have taken out my forces, let them inside the ship and activate the ray shields and, once they are trapped, initiate a hostage negotiation where they peacefully surrender themselves to me or I threaten to kill this Sunset person right in front of them."

"I was going to suggest disintegrating them but your plan sounds more beneficial in the long run."

"Well, I would love to stay and chat, but I have a human that needs duping. Cheerio."

When Kronos hung up on Laeyoon, he noticed Fluttershy peeping through the can he was hiding in. Perhaps he should have turned the spell off before talking to Oude.

"Oh, buggery! How much of what I just said did you hear?"

He could have let Fluttershy answer but he knew the answer was going to be a scream so he did the responsible thing: use his telekinesis to knock her out with the trash can lid.

"Right then," Kronos said as he climbed out of the can, "Time for Plan B, which is to wander in there myself and render anyone unconscious if they spot me."

Unfortunately for Kronos, he did not plan on the seal teleporting out of the house by using a big angelic beam of light from the sky. Kronos immediately tried to chase after it but it vanished along with the light. Kronos then had an idea. Since hiding the Seal of Beauty in a place that's filled with beautiful creatures was a pretty obvious place to hide it, maybe the seal moved to somewhere far less pretty. Now the hard part would be to figure out what would be the least pretty place to hide in.

Author's Note

(notices the date this chapter was uploaded)

Oh, wait. No, I'm not. I'm going to watch Megatron conduct the 1812 Overture. Oh, and blow stuff up as well. :twilightsmile:

Chapter 7 - Space Trip

Since finding the Seal of Beauty turned out to be a complete bust, Kronos decided the next best thing would be to wait for Twilight, her allies, and Laeyoon Oude to make their way to his ship so he could get them to surrender in exchange for Sunset's life. But then he remembered he still had that mercenary on the payroll, so he decided to give him a call while leaving the negotiations as a perfectly serviceable Plan B.

Meanwhile, on Equestria, Whooves hads finally completed the spaceship. While it would normally have taken months or even years to make a spaceship as sophisticated as this one, Whooves had some help from Princess Luna, who had a surprising amount of knowledge about how space travel works. Then again, I suppose one tends to know those things when one has spent a millennium on the moon. Twilight helped out too, of course, since she knew a lot about science as well. But before they could go on their travels, they were going to need all the help they can get. And so, they brought Derpy, Starlight Glimmer, the Cutie Mark Crusaders, and Captain Goodking with them so they would be well prepared for Kronos' forces.

However, unbeknownst to them, the mercenary Kronos hired had been keeping an eye on them. He would have busted Laeyoon out but the problem was he was too busy spending his blood money on chimichangas. As he observed them, he noticed his holocommunicator going off, blaring with the volume of an air horn. Since such a loud noise would easily blow his cover, he ran for it and hid away in the woods to take Kronos' call.

"Yo, whazzup, Kro-bro?"

"I'm not entirely sure if I like that nickname. Anyways, you know those ponies I told you to follow? I would like you to stow away upon that ship of theirs ship and take them out by surprise."

"Kronos, my stallion. Taking people out is my speciality."

"But can you do it by surprise?"

"I think I can. Why not give it a shot?"

"Good to hear. Now get to work." Kronos switched off the transmission.

The mercenary ran as quickly as he could into the ship and hid in a closet, hoping nopony would question his sexuality. From there, he noticed everypony else galloping on board through a little gap in the closet doors he made. He also noticed that the princesses were also levitating Laeyoon and Jaesa's cage into the ship as well. He then silently closed the closet doors and thought of what would be the best one-liner once he decides to reveal himself and turn everypony on the ship into a kebab. As they shot off into space, with Whooves shouting "Allons-y!" excitedly, he thought up what to say and immediately burst out of the closet, with a pair of katanas in both of his hooves screaming what he thought was witty but was instead random:

"SPACE KEBABS, BITCHES!"

Naturally, the mercenary's random attack has made piloting the ship more difficult than it needed to be. Thankfully, nopony got seriously injured since they all immediately whaled on him and threw him and his katanas, which upon further inspection were as dull as butter knives, own in the same cage as Laeyoon and Jaesa.

"Now hang on a minute!" the mercenary said while taking note of his new surroundings, "How did this happen? I'm smarter than this!"

"Apparently not," Laeyoon said dryly.

“Eh, whatever.” Having nothing better to do, the mercenary began to sharpen his katanas on the metal bars of his cage so next time he’d actually be prepared to fight.

Everyone who was caged up decided to look at the inside of the ship. It looked exactly as one would expect from a rocket, but sleeker and made of a bronze-coloured alloy and had more of a "timey-wimey" feel to it, for lack of better words. Naturally, this made the mercenary even more bored so he decided to kill time by taking advantage of his unnatural regenerative abilities.

"One," he said while cutting one of his hooves off with his katana, an act that did not go unnoticed by everyone on board.

"Uh, what are you doing?" Laeyoon asked.

"I'm bored and I thought why not make some money by cutting my hooves off and selling them to a glue factory as soon as I am out of this cage."

"That sounds painfully moronic." Laeyoon then noticed the mercenary's hoof grow back, along with the clothing that was once on it for some reason.

"You were saying? Two."

He then cut off another hoof while Laeyoon looked on in morbid amazement. Did this mercenary know the secret to immortality that most Sith could only dream of? Or better yet, was this mercenary extremely powerful in the dark side but keeping his power a secret so no one would try to kill him? So many questions, so little time. However, just because Laeyoon wais enjoying the show doesn't mean everyone else was, as Twilight, her friends, Luna, Starlight Glimmer, the Cutie Mark Crusaders, and Captain Goodking looked on with disgust. The Crusaders, in particular, looked like they were about to vomit. An hour has passed and the sound of a sword meeting flesh and bone and the stench of blood and rotting hooves was really starting to make everyone on the ship both annoyed and grossed out.

"For the love of my sister!" Luna said in an annoyed tone. "Would you please stop mutilating yourself like that?!"

"Got any better ways to pass the time, princess?" the mercenary said in a snide tone before cutting off one of his hooves again, "One hundred and forty-seven.". Unfortunately, everypony had run out of doggy bags at this point so Captain Goodking, in a desperate need to hurl his guts out, opened one of the ship doors. That proved to be an almost fatal mistake since it sucked nearly everyone out into space. Luckily, Twilight and Luna cast a few spells and managed to save everyone from getting sucked out into space.

"My glue money!" the mercenary cried out, distraught that he couldn't make an extra bit of money as soon as he was done killing everypony on the ship because all of his dismembered hooves got thrown out into space. And to make matters worse for the mercenary, his katanas got sucked out into space as well. On the bright side, at least no one had to deal with the smell anymore. However, the mercenary's stomach began to grumble. And it wasn't because he was hungry, it was because he's having a really bad case of Montezuma's Revenge. And if everyone didn't want to put up with a different smell to replace the still lingering smell of blood and rotting flesh, they would need to give him some bathroom privileges.

"Hey, can I quickly use the bathroom in here? I think my chimichangas are duking it out my three-day-old Taco Tuesday taco!"

The mercenary's stomach grumbled louder, with him wishing he didn't say "duke".

"Nice try, buddy!" Captain Goodking said, "We ain't letting you out of there so you can throw us out into space again."

"That was you, you idiot!" the mercenary yelled.

"Yeah, but I wouldn't have done that if you weren't grossing everyone out!"

"What, so you want me to gross them out some more?"

Captain Goodking sighed in exasperation and immediately pulled out the key to the cage and lifted the mercenary by the back of his neck. Rather than trust the mercenary, however, he decided to "accidentally" open the door again by making it look he was tripping over and grabbing onto the door handle by "mistake". This resulted in everyone backing away from the door and the mercenary getting sucked out into space as he let out a familiar yelp.

"Goodking!" the princesses yelled in an annoyed tone.

"What? It was an accident!"

Author's Note

Well, this stopped being family-friendly really fast. :rainbowlaugh:

Chapter 8 - No One Can Hear You Scream

Since that it was taking forever to reach Kronos' ship, wherever it was, everyone, with the exception of Pinkie Pie, who was now in charge of piloting the ship, decided to get some shut-eye. They also managed to sanitize the ship so they didn't have to worry about the smell of dismembered hooves and puddles of the mercenary's blood. That said, they are about to have a different reason for any potential nightmares. Good thing they have Luna on their side, right?

Starlight found herself in the School of Friendship, looking derelict, barren, and a bit more beige in colour than usual. This made her nervous, with her wondering where everyone is. Was there an attack on the school she was unaware of? All she could recall was waking up in her office with no memory of how she got there. While wandering about the abandoned corridors, she noticed there was an Earth pony with a dulled turquoise mane and coat staring out of one of the windows. She walked closer to the pony to get a better look at his cutie mark, hoping that it wasn't what she thought it was. And if it was, it could have just simply meant the pony was good at maths. The pony noticed Starlight walking towards him and slowly turned around with a blank expression on his face. He looked like Sandbar but there was something...off...about him. His eyes were glazed over, and he stared straight ahead as if Starlight wasn't even there.

"Hey, Sandbar," Starlight said in an awkward tone, clearly trying to hide the fact that she was freaking out on the inside.

"You look...different," Sandbar said in a monotone voice.

"D...Different?"

Sandbar pointed to her flank. "You changed your cutie mark."

Starlight then looked where Sandbar was pointing and noticed that her cutie mark was now an equal sign. This caused her to panic and run to the nearest toilet to hope that what she's thinking isn't happening. She looked in the mirror and, much to her horror, her mane had reverted back to when she was running her town. She backed away in terror, only for her to accidentally open one of the toilet stall doors. It wouldn't have been that bad if it weren't for the fact that it showed one of the students sitting on the toilet with the same blank expression and dulled colours as Sandbar. She then immediately ran back to her office and hid under the desk in a fetal position.

"Nononononono! This can't be happening!"

"What's happening?" a familiar nasally sounding voice said, but in a monotone that didn't sound that great or powerful at all, "Nothing out of the ordinary has happened in ages."

Starlight looked up and noticed Trixie looking down at her blankly. She wasn't wearing her magician's outfit and her cutie mark had been replaced with an equal sign.

"Trixie," Starlight whispered in horror "Wh...What happened to you?"

"What do you mean? Don't you remember? The princesses had retired and your teacher was doing a poor job of her royal duties."

Starlight's office then immediately began tearing itself apart before reassembling itself into a burning Ponyville occupied by armoured bipedal creatures wearing hoods.

"Her attempts at befriending those who think friendship is a lie ended in disaster. They were fuelled by passion. And in that passion, they slaughtered everypony without mercy."

Trixie them placed a hoof on Starlight's shoulder.

"Fortunately for us, you had the wisdom and the skill to bring these foul creatures to heel. But in order for another incident like this to never occur, you made everypony equal."

Starlight could only stare at the scenery in shock. Was what Trixie saying true? Was she really that willing to relapse if it meant protecting Equestria? Was removing everypony's ability to feel passionate emotions necessary for the good of Equestria?

"There's got to be another way! I mean, surely they can be reasoned with, right?"

"You make it sound like we haven't tried that."

The burning Ponyville then immediately shifted into the inside of Tartarus, which was void of any prisoners.

"While we could have tried imprisoning them in Tartarus, your princess insisted that they could be allies. Even if they were imprisoned, there wouldn't be enough room for all of them. And that's not even getting into the fact that Grogar, or Discord I should say, managed to free the likes of Tirek and Cozy Glow from their imprisonment."

While Starlight was incredibly frightened by what she had seen, she still refused to believe this was the future of Equestria. She then immediately felt a cold pit in the centre of her heart, something that Trixie sensed and smiled coldly at.

"You know what you would have to do, Starlight."

That pit eventually became filled with something warm, burning as a matter of fact. Images flashed in her head that magnified her fear and that burning feeling. Images of destruction perpetrated by the hooded marauders. While trying to shake the images out of her head, she ends up blasting half of Trixie's face with an unstable bit of magic, knocking Trixie off her hooves in the process. When she realized what she had done, she immediately ran to Trixie to apologize for what she did. But when Trixie got up, the part of her face that was blasted with magic had gone a darker blue and was more draconic in appearance. The eye that was part of the injured face was glowing green as well.

"Now that was just uncalled for," Trixie said in a mix between her voice and a deep but raspy one, making her sound borderline demonic.

Trixie's mouth then began to gruesomely morph into a dragon's mouth, with all of her bones cracking and wings bursting out of her back as well. Her forelegs grew longer and more muscular, with her hooves morphing into sharp claws and two bone claws protruding out of one of her forelegs. Her hindlegs grew shorter but still more muscular in appearance. Her abdomen and back area also grew longer. By the time she had finished transforming, Starlight recoiled in terror before recognizing who "Trixie" had transformed into.

"Remember me?" Sanies said with a sickening smile on his face.

Starlight got into an attack position and blasted Sanies with a mighty blast of magic, which he immediately blocked with his fire breath. Sanies then telekinetically grabbed Starlight and tossed her into a wall. Starlight tried to get up but Sanies pulled her down onto the floor before immediately dragging her towards himself. He quickly seized Starlight by the neck and looked at her in the eyes with a sadistic grin.

"Good to know the Elements haven't entirely removed my power. Now then, since you won't willingly surrender to old habits, it appears I will have to do this the hard way."

Sanies' eyes glowed brighter as he tried to enter Starlight's head by force, causing Tartarus to collapse around them into nothingness. That nothingness then got replaced with flashing images of Starlight's memories, with some of Sanies' memories thrown in as well. He smiled at how well his plan was going, up until he got hit with a magic blast to the back, causing him to drop Starlight and the flashing memories to eventually turn back into nothingness. Both Starlight and Sanies looked up to see who attacked Sanies, seeing it was none other than Princess Luna.

"Excellent," Sanies muttered to himself, "I knew this would get her attention."

Author's Note

If you're new to the Captain Goodking saga, Sanies is the main antagonist of A series of unfortunate events that leads to another redeemed villain, yay! and the secondary antagonist of its sequel, Captain Goodking and the Nightmare Knights. Oh, and he's the one that kicked off the Storm King's redemption.

I must admit, his threat level has kinda diminished since his last couple of appearances (hey, it happens when you get turned into stone and smashed to pieces the first time around and when you get blasted with the Elements the second time around) but, unlike canonical villains like Chrysalis and Tirek, Sanies still manages to be pretty menacing and not to mention persistent.

Chapter 9 - Another Uneasy Alliance

Starlight and Luna immediately cornered Sanies and were ready to attack. Sanies just chuckled.

"Luna," Sanies said with false courtesy, "How is retirement?"

"What are you doing here? The Elements should have banished you for good."

"I expected the Elements to send me to oblivion as well, but it appears that Fate had other plans for me." Sanies tore a hole through the nothingness to show what appeared to be a rock hidden away in the mercenary's trousers as the mercenary was busy chopping ponies into itty-bitty pieces. "Speaking of which, I'm also surprised this one is still alive even though I distinctly remember incinerating him centuries ago. Guess I'm not the only one that's very difficult to kill."

Luna conjured up a spear and pointed it at Sanies, which resulted in Sanies chuckling.

"Do not worry, princess. I didn't come here to fight. I thought we could come to an alliance."

"And why should we trust a remorseless monster such as yourself?" Luna said.

"You have someone named 'Discord' for an ally. I think trusting someone who tried to destroy the world and remake it in his own image doesn't sound that far-fetched in comparison to having the Lord of Chaos for a friend. Speaking of which, I'm surprised you didn't bring him on board with you. He would have easily solved your problem with a mere finger snap."

Luna immediately put away her spear and her and Starlight reverted to a normal standing position.

"Continue," Luna said.

"Since you all are on a quest to take down Kronos, I figured I could be of service to you. Especially considering how my master told me everything about Kronos' plan."

Sanies woke up to his master grinning down at him. Amusingly for his master, this was one of those rare times he had seen Sanies spooked.

"Rise and shine, Sleeping Beauty!" Sacanas said in an energetic tone.

Sanies then looked down and noticed he had changeling hooves in place of his claws.

I have so many questions on my mind right now, Sanies thought to himself.

"I know," Sacanas said with his horns glowing, indicating that he was reading Sanies' mind when he thought that comment, "But I'm betting the top one is 'What the Tartarus is he doing here? I could have sworn I have killed him'!"

"You got me."

"Well, there's this time-travelling unicorn named Kronos. He is what one would refer to as a Time-Turner and he wants to collect the seven Seals of the Planets for their unlimited power, as any good villain would do, so he went back in time and saved me from that exact moment where you killed me. He said he needed a diversion so the princesses and their forces don't meddle in his plans so he brought me here with some alien invaders to try and take over the world. But of course, not everypony is going to be fighting the aliens so we are going to take care of any independent factors by luring them into a maze and trapping them in a fantasy land that you will provide!"

"And why should I help you and this Kronos you speak of?" Sanies asked.

"Because he has offered us some of that power in return."

"You do know he will betray us, right? At least, that's what I would do."

"That's exactly what I'd do as well. But the thing is, along with those Seals, there is also the Fish of Knowledge that would grant you a fraction of what power the seals have. For if knowledge is power, then an alicorn...am.."

Sacanas then said "IIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!" in a low gravelly voice before inhaling through his nose.

"Was that over the top? I can never tell! Anyways, you stay right here and get acquainted with your new changeling form while I go and get my staff back. While I could easily suck the magic out of everyone in Equestria, I thought I might save it for Celestia."

Sanies took Sacanas' advice and looked for something shiny to use as a mirror. He noticed that not only did the changeling body he was inhabiting have a striking resemblance to an alicorn, but it also had what appeared to be a literal piece of him dangling from its neck.

"Well, that explains it."

In the present, Sanies was explaining to Luna and Starlight how he was still here despite the Elements defeating him the last time he and Luna had met.

"While the Elements have expunged me from your form, it appears a part of my consciousness was still in that bit of rock wrapped around Chrysalis' neck. However, they have weakened me to the point that I could only influence her at best. Clearly, she did not take kindly to having a voice in her head commanding her so she took off that part of me and threw me at the mercenary, though not by intention." Sanies said before letting out a little chuckle "A pity really since, if I had known Grogar would have returned and recruited Chrysalis to his little party, I would have liked to have stuck around. Anyway, for reasons unknown, the mercenary decided to pick me up and place me in one of his pockets. And so here we are."

"I'm very certain Captain Goodking ejected the mercenary into space," Luna pointed out.

"I believe the rock must have fell out of his pocket at some point while he was on this ship. Either that or I simply, for lack of better words, 'jumped ship' and latched myself on to Starlight. So, which of you fine ladies want to help me take care of Kronos?"

"I admit, I'm not familiar with these Seals of the Planets that you speak of. But if Kronos was offering your master a share of the power, why do you intend on betraying him?" Luna asked.

"Personally, I don't think our goals would align. Also, despite me betraying my master and the one formerly known as Storm King, I have never been betrayed before so I do not intend on getting betrayed now."

Sanies walked closer to Luna. Luna still clearly didn't trust Sanies and neither did Starlight, but if he was apparently willing to help them, they'll have to take that chance.

"Since I don't have much of a corporeal form anymore, and I have mentioned that the Elements have weakened me, I'm going to need someone to act as a time-share, for lack of better words."

"We allow you to control us? You're out of your mind."

"First of all, I only need one of you. And second, it's only for temporary moments in time."

Sanies moved towards Starlight while grabbing her face and slightly stroking it.

"While I would have taken her, something tells me that, regarding her affinity for mind-control magic, none of you would be permitting that. Honestly, looking inside her head, I'm surprised Sombra managed to control her so easily. Then again, he taught Sacanas everything he knew and Sacanas passed it on to me."

Sanies moved back towards Luna.

"But you are an all-powerful alicorn. Well, almost all-powerful. You're not your sister, after all." Sanies chuckled at that last statement, knowing that if it weren't for Celestia tapping into her dark side all those years ago, he could have easily won that fight. Fragmented memories from Chrysalis' mind popped into his head, showing her and her changeling forces capturing the princess. He wondered if the reason why a mere bug managed to best Celestia is because she was holding back.

What pathetic weakness, Sanies thought to himself.

Sanies flew backwards and then sat down to give the two ponies some time to think. To him, it doesn't matter which one would allow him to enter her head because they both have their own unique benefits, which Sanies had gladly pointed out to the both of them.

"So," Sanies said, clasping his front claws together, "Who's it going to be?"

Author's Note

The Jim Carrey reference is strong in this one. Except not really because many would have not noticed it. :derpytongue2:

Chapter 10 - Konfronting Kronos

On board the control room of his ship, Kronos looked through the massive window in front of him. Amidst all of the space he could see was a little steampunk ship that, similar to the Entropy, also had a timey-wimey feel to it. The only difference between that ship and the Entropy, apart from size, was that the little ship looked almost like someone turned over a telephone box and stuck gears and clocks onto it. While one would have expected a ship like that to be painted blue, it instead was painted bronze and it had all sorts of gears and clockwork sticking out of it. The engines were also visible and powered by Flameless Fireworks. Kronos smiled at the ship, knowing it was the handiwork of Doctor Whooves. Unfortunately, the time he spent admiring the ship was cut short by Cowardly Donkey walking into the control room.

"There is an unknown ship, master! It may belong to the ponies that want to stop us!"

"Really? I wonder what gave you that idea," Kronos deadpanned before barking out an order "Have the Plungerzaps at the ready."

"But they have a princess on their side, master! The princess would annihilate our forces!"

"Look at you using big words. Well, the good news is that I am counting on whatever princess they have on their side to take out our forces. After all, if our defences were lowered, they'd know right off the bat that this is a trap."

"Such wisdom, master. I'll tell our forces to attack immediately!"

With that, Cowardly Donkey left the control room to inform Kronos' men to get into the Plungerzaps to attack the enemy ship. Meanwhile, Kronos conjured up a bucket of popcorn so he could have a snack while enjoying the carnage, even though it would be his men that would be dying.

Meanwhile, on the ship Doctor Whooves had built, Pinkie's energy seemed to have run out since she was desperately fighting the urge to fall asleep. Unfortunately, no matter how many times she slapped herself in the face or how many cups of coffee she drank, she eventually gave up and fell asleep on the controls. But that was enough to startle everyone awake, except Luna, who appeared to be in a deep slumber.

"Centaurs!" Whooves shouted, clearly a little disoriented from the sudden blare of noises the ship made when Pinkie fell on the controls "Perverting the course of Equestrian history!"

"Hey, Doc," Pinkie said in a very weary voice, "Is it me or do those asteroids look like pepper po-"

Before she could finish her sentence, she instantly fell asleep, snoring loudly. Whooves quickly moved Pinkie out of the way and observed through the front window what Pinkie was describing.

"Great wickering stallions! Everypony! Get to your battle stations!"

And with that, Luna slowly got up and cracked her neck. The Cutie Mark Crusaders got out Pinkie's party cannon, hoping Pinkie didn't mind them borrowing it while she was asleep. Everyone immediately climbed onto the top of the ship, with Twilight providing a great big magical field to provide everyone with air, and started attacking what appeared to be ponies encased in pepper pots that also had plungers and some sort of laser gun attached to them. While everyone was putting up a good fight, it was Luna that happened to be doing the most work, flying through the air and viciously attacking most if not all the enemies with all sorts of magical blasts and flying maneuvers. Such brutality on Luna's half was enough to surprise even Kronos, until Kronos looked more closely at Luna and noticed a small green tint in her eyes.

"Interesting," Kronos said while observing Luna, "It appears I will have to call back the remaining forces".

Kronos then immediately pressed a button that activated a holocommunicator to the surviving Plungerzaps.

"Attention all Plungerzaps, fall back immediately."

The Plungerzaps, having the good sense to run, complied and shot off back into the Entropy. Luna, or rather whatever entity was in control of her, smiled as the Plungerzaps retreated.

"Pity, I was enjoying myself."

The entity then looked at Luna's reflection and noticed that a green glow was showing in her eyes, so Luna's eyes blinked to get rid of that glow. After that, everyone got back inside the ship, which was suddenly teleported inside of the Entropy. While it was unusual that their ship just got teleported, they immediately walked out of the ship.

"Now then," Doctor Whooves said while looking at Laeyoon Oude, who was still trapped in a cage with his apprentice, "I trust you know where Kronos might be on this ship".

"Of course. He's in the control room, which is just up that lift over there, then forward, then a left, then another left, then a right, then another left, then forward, then another right, then forward again."

And so everyone immediately followed Oude's instructions, along with carrying the cage he was in, unaware that he was leading them into a trap. When they were about to enter the control room, they were suddenly entrapped in some sort of shield.

"Oh yeah," Laeyoon said slyly, "I forgot to mention the ray shields. Oops."

"Wait a minute," Whooves said in surprise, "How did this happen? We're smarter than this."

"Apparently not, my old friend," a nasally voice with a slight British accent said. Whooves could recognize that voice anywhere.

"You!"

"Yes, me. Kronos. Former leader of the Time Turners until they exiled me after starting a war between us and the Realm Ravagers. Well, technically, the Ravagers started it but I had no interest in a peace treaty so...you know, even stevens. Oh, but before we can continue our little chat, can I please have my pets back?"

And with that, Kronos used a time spell to pause time so he could temporarily turn off the ray shield, unlock the cage Laeyoon and Jaesa was in, knock Jaesa out, and turn the ray shield back on but not before moving Laeyoon out of the cage. Everyone, including Laeyoon, just stared at Kronos as if wondering what just happened.

"Well now," Kronos said, "What were you expecting from somepony who calls himself a 'Time Turner'?"

"Uhh...Thanks?" Laeyoon said, just as befuddled as everyone else.

"No problem. While we are here, I'd like to have a chat with you."

And with that, Kronos' horn glowed as he telekinetically held Laeyoon up and angrily threw him about like a ragdoll, slamming him into the floor several times. After that, he looked at everyone who was trapped in the ray shield and immediately let Laeyoon go.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Kronos said without losing his courteous tone "I'm usually far more composed. I'm just a little bit absolutely livid!"

"I ghink ghyou ghoke eye ghaw," Laeyoon said, with his jaw stuck at an unnatural angle, which he tried to set back in place with painful results.

"Now, where was I? Oh yes, the part where you and your little friends surrender to me, Doctor."

"Right, like we're going to-" Rainbow Dash said before getting spontaneously knocked out.

"Was I talking to you?" Kronos said to Rainbow's unconscious form, "No, I was talking to Doctor. But of course, since time tends to be 'wibbly-wobbly' for lack of better words, I figured I might throw a card onto the table in order to make your surrender less of a possibility and more of a certainty."

Kronos' horn lit up and everyone turned around to notice the sound of footsteps behind them. They looked at what they assumed was the source of the footsteps and noticed a mind-controlled Sunset Shimmer walking towards them. Kronos turned towards Twilight and smiled.

"I take it you two have met before. Here's the deal, princess. You and your friends will follow me into your prison cell and if any one of you even think about attacking me, I will snap her pretty little neck. If you comply, I will release her from my control and make the last couple of months she spent here be nothing more but a bad headache. Understand?"

Twilight, after seeing the merciless brutality Kronos inflicted on one of his own allies as well as him rendering Rainbow Dash unconscious without breaking a sweat, weighed her options and reluctantly complied. After all, if this was a pony that could casually manipulate time in a way most unicorns and even alicorns could only dream of and thinks nothing of all the atrocities he is responsible for, then he is clearly every bit as dangerous as Whooves described him as.

"We will do as you ask, as long as you release Sunset," Twilight said.

"Good thing I asked you then instead of Doctor. Mainly because I sense that stopping me would be his top priority instead of saving lives like he is supposed to."

"Now that is not true!" Whooves exclaimed, "You know for a fact that, along with learning whatever scientific knowledge I can get my hands on, I also use that knowledge to revolutionize and even save as many lives as I can!"

"Really? Well, if that's the case..."

Kronos gave Whooves a deathly glare filled with murderous intent, his smile widening as he did so. And then he asked, in a much more sinister tone, a question that shook Whooves to the bone:

"...then why did you flee?"

Author's Note

If you're wondering, yes, the Plungerzaps do look like Daleks. No, they do not have hideously mutated ponies inside them. And yes, Kronos did reference DBZ Abridged:

Yes, he said that exactly the way Frieza said it. Also, that was my reaction when I found out the Trevorrow Cut of The Rise of Skywalker doesn't exist because Colin Trevorrow was booted off the director's seat very early in production for "creative differences". I bet those differences were along the lines of "this feels too much like The Last Jedi. This feels too new, I don't like it. This needs to appease the angry fans. This is too much like the ending of Lost. This has space dinosaurs."

Ahem, totally not salty about how The Rise of Skywalker turned out:

Chapter 12 - Big Bad Duumvirate

In the present, Whooves was still standing with fear while Kronos looked on.

"Perhaps you didn't hear me clearly," Kronos said, his tone switching back to his false courtesy, "I said, if you revolutionize and save lives, why did you flee?"

"You weren't there," Whooves said, his tone a mix of fear and anger, "You were hiding away in your office. You never saw what was born. The Realm Ravagers, the Clockworkers, the hordes of travesties, the Disordered Hivemind, King Lavan and his Lava Demons, the Alicorn of Death and his army of Necro-ponies! The war turned into a nightmare!"

"It's a matter of perspective, really. Anywho, I'd love to stay and chat but I've got more important things to attend to. So let's say we get a move on."

Kronos then switched off the ray shield and everyone began to reluctantly follow Kronos, carrying an unconscious Rainbow Dash along the way. They arrived to the prison cell, which had unoccupied chains and bloodstains on the walls. There were also rings designed to be placed on a unicorn horn to prevent any magical escapes. When Kronos' new prisoners entered the cell, Kronos released Sunset from the Fiducia Compelus spell, as per their agreement. The release, along with the amount of psychic torture Sunset had to go through before Kronos used the spell on her, caused her to immediately collapse onto the floor.

"Oh, she'll be alright," Kronos said in a jovial tone, "After all, what better way to cure months of agonizing interrogation and mental torture than a good old memory spell."

As some of Kronos' guards entered the cell to chain everyone up and place the rings on any unicorns present, the cell door closed and Kronos gestured to some of his other guards to move Sunset's unconscious form into the control room. But before he walked off with them to erase Sunset's memories of her time spent here, Kronos opened the cell door in order to get somepony that he would assume would be beneficial to his plan.

"Oh, one more thing. I would like to have a word with Princess Luna. Meet me in my office."

The guards then ceased to lock Luna up and Luna followed Kronos as he ran ahead to the control room. Thing is, it wasn't Luna, it was someone else occupying Luna's body. Suddenly, Kronos's holocommunicator began to ring.

"Oh bugger, not him again!" Kronos grumbled.

"No, Starscream, I will not support your bid to overthrow Megatron as leader of the Decepticons, now stop calling me!" Kronos angrily ended his call and sat down in his chair, turning it around to face "Luna".

"Ah, sorry about that. I think you know why I've brought you here...Sanies."

"How did you know I was in control of Luna?" Sanies asked.

"Well, for starters, it was the way you disposed of my forces. And then there was that green glow in her eyes that sealed the deal," Kronos said.

"If you wish to inform me of your plans, my former master has already done that."

"Really? Including the bit where you control Luna and murder everypony if they tried to escape?"

"No, because I'm betting you came up with that on the spot."

"What can I say? I'm an opportunist." Kronos spun around in his chair and put his hooves up on the desk.

"That may be, but what makes you so certain that I would ally myself with you? Especially considering I am now literally in possession of an alicorn."

"Because I can find a way to make that possession permanent, if that's what you desire."

Kronos' snake-like eyes glowed brighter for a moment when he emphasized the word "permanent". Luna's eyes glowed the same yellow colour as Kronos' eyes for the exact same time as Kronos' before rolling up into the back of her head. She grimaced and struggled for a moment before her jaw dropped a bit. And as soon as her eyes rolled back down, she immediately raised her jaw back up and observed her surroundings.

"Where am I?" Luna asked.

"On the Entropy, my dear."

Luna looked towards the pony who said that. The unicorn sitting before her had a goatee, a pair of yellow snake-like eyes and a devilish grin. He also had a black slicked-back mane and a grey coat, along with a cutie mark that resembled a clock.

"Kronos, I presume," she said.

"I wonder what gave it away. Was it the cutie mark? Or maybe it's because I look like the bad guy. Anyhow, it appears that you don't remember what Sanies did while controlling you so allow me to give you a quick recap. I allowed you and your allies to decimate my forces so it would make it look less like a trap. Then I trapped you and imprisoned your friends after they surrendered to me."

"Impossible! We would never surrender to you!" Luna bellowed.

"Willingly. You would never surrender to me willingly. Which is why I had a former pupil of your sister, I believe the pupil's name was Sunset Shimmer, taken hostage and threatened to snap her neck if they did not walk into their prison cell. And then me and Sanies had a little chat."

"I suppose that 'little chat' involved you two striking a deal that involved him pretending to be me and then striking everypony down when they least expect it."

"Well, that's one part of it. Weirdly enough, he has no interest in working with me. But luckily for me, I'm a very persuasive pony."

Kronos' eyes glowed brighter when he said that sentence. Unlike the last time Kronos used some sort of trigger word, Luna's eyes glowed a slight green this time for just a brief moment. And then her face turned to an emotionless expression.

"Never do that again," Sanies said, back in control of Luna.

"Out of curiosity, when I'm not using my own powers of persuasion to force you two to switch places, how long do you two have each?"

"We agreed to an hour per turn," Sanies replied.

"Do you two communicate when none of you are in control?"

"When this vessel is asleep? Yes, I tell her everything that has transpired and she tells me everything that has transpired. But of course, I had my fingers crossed when I made that agreement."

"Interesting. Right then, here's the deal: I suppress Luna's consciousness from her body and you can take up permanent residence in it. But first, you must help me find the seven Seals of the Planets. And the best way to do that is, if my new prisoners escape, you follow their every move because, well now, they are more likely to find the seals than my incompetent forces are!"

"And if they find all seven seals?" Sanies asked.

"Well, isn't it obvious?" Kronos grinned sinisterly. "You kill them!"

Author's Note

I'm pretty sure Sanies has got Kronos' back on this one.

In his sights, that is.

Chapter 13 - Escape Plan

In front of the cell that contained the good guys, Laeyoon was busy holding his holocommunicator waiting for that droid to answer. He would have expected Quinn, but Quinn had revealed himself to be allied with Darth Baras and locked himself in a room with a pair of combat droids specifically designed for Laeyoon's death, (or at least that's what Quinn told him). Soon enough, the droid answered.

"Master? Oh thank the Maker you're alive!" the droid said, happy his master has returned. Laeyoon just sat there with a bored look on his face, which quickly shifted into one of mild amusement.

"Did you honestly think I would be beaten that easily?" Laeyoon said, not addressing the droid since he had forgotten the droid's name.

"You're right. Since your companions have informed me of the many times your enemies and a few beasts have struck you down, I shouldn't be so skeptical."

"Bring the ship to these coordinates and tell Pierce to get his arse over here. If I had to list one regret regarding my mission to that planet, it's not bringing the big guy."

Laeyoon heard the sound of someone clearing her throat. He turned around and noticed Jaesa standing behind him with her arms crossed and an unamused expression. Laeyoon shot her a sheepish grin.

"Oh. Sorry, Jaesa, I forgot you were there."

But before anyone could react, Laeyoon was suddenly struck by a bolt of what appeared to be Dathomirian Nightsister magic. The impact immediately rendered him unconscious. Jaesa turned to where the attack came from and noticed a dark blue equine with a pair of wings, a horn, and glowing green eyes. The equine looked at her with a smirk.

"I am going to make you suffer!" Jaesa said as she ignited her lightsaber, ready to charge in to the being that attacked her master and lover.

Inside the cell, our heroes listened to the sound of magical blasts, impacts against the walls, and electricity emitting throughout the fight that was occurring outside of their cell. And then there was silence. Soon, the cell door was opened and they were greeted with the sight of Princess Luna.

"Fear not, my subjects," Luna said pridefully, "Your princess of the night is here to..."

But before she can finish her sentence, she felt a tight choking sensation around her neck. As she gasped for air, she looked behind her and noticed Laeyoon was awake and standing, his arm in a heightened position and his hand clenched into a fist.

"Don't you know who I am?" Laeyoon said in an exaggerated accent that wouldn't be out of place in the underworld of Coruscant. "I'm a Sith Juggernaut, bitch!"

And with that, he quickly threw Luna into the cell and walked to the control panel to close the cell door. As he closed the door, he heard rapid footsteps coming down the corridor. He turned to the source of the sound and noticed it was no one more than Lt. Pierce.

"Where's the action?" Pierce asked.

"You just missed it. Jaesa and one of the prisoners put up a bit of a fight but, thanks to my assistance, the prisoner is right back where she belo..."

The sound of chains being unlocked grabbed Laeyoon's attention, pausing his conversation with Pierce. Laeyoon walked towards the cell door and banged it with the fist he used to choke Luna with.

"Oi! What do you think you're doing in there?!"

"Take a wild guess!" Captain Goodking replied.

Laeyoon then quickly turned back to Pierce to continue his conversation. "The prisoners are vainly trying to escape. Predictable. Now, where was I? Oh yeah, Jaesa needs a quick trip to the medical bay. And if there's no med-bays around, we can always place her in a bacta tank."

"Shouldn't you be more concerned with the prisoners?" Pierce asked.

"Oh they'll be fine. This Kronos fellow has added precautions that negate anyone's ability to use the Force."

The moment Laeyoon immediately finished his sentence, with closed eyes and a confident toothy grin, there was a massive explosion that made the cell door fly clean off and hit a wall. Laeyoon's smug expression changed to one of open eyes wide open with shrunken irises and his jaw hung open like an exogorth awaiting its next meal. Pierce walked towards his lord and placed his hand under Laeyoon's chin to lift it up and close his mouth.

"Pierce?" Laeyoon asked with a hint of fear, "Did you bring my spare lightsaber?"

"You didn't ask."

"Then you're on your own for this one."

And with that, Laeyoon made a mad dash down the corridor to his ship. The problem with that is he didn't know where the docking bay is. Pierce meanwhile faced the prisoners and charged right at them before jumping up and pounding his blaster into the floor. The slam created a shockwave that sent the prisoners flying back, with Pierce using a wire to rope them back towards them and giving Captain Goodking the first punch. He then aimed his blaster at Rainbow Dash in an attempt to shoot her down, only managing to stun her when he quickly aimed the blaster at the Cutie Mark Crusaders and fired, with Dash swiftly managing to block the shot. While he would have usually set his blaster for kill, he figured that Laeyoon and his new allies would want the prisoners alive. While Pierce put up a good fight, he only managed to take down three of the prisoners, with Derpy flying into a wall and knocking herself out. Soon enough, he got pinned down by Luna, who dug one of her hooves into Pierce's back like he was a massive cockroach.

"Here's how this will work," Luna said while looking at Pierce ferociously, "You will lead us to your ship or you will spend the rest of your life out of action. Do you understand?"

"Do you expect me to betray the Empire?" Pierce asked defiantly, "Not a chance!"

Luna then smiled like a rabid animal as she lifted her hoof up, ready to deal a crippling blow. But before she could do that, she was suddenly pushed into a wall. Pierce then noticed that Laeyoon Oude had returned, lightsaber in hand.

"What can I say?" Laeyoon said with a shrug, "You're a great asset to me. Now, let's run for it!"

Author's Note

If no-one got to that bit in the Sith Warrior storyline where Quinn betrays the player, oops, spoilers. :twilightblush:

Also, Luna is still possessed by Sanies if you're wondering why she is more ruthless.

And I could not resist making Laeyoon quote the Juggernaut. :rainbowlaugh:

Chapter 14 - Running For It

Our heroes went into their attack positions while Laeyoon walked towards them with his new lightsaber in his hand. Rather than make the first move like he always did, he instead deactivated it and picked up Jaesa, who was unconscious from her fight with Luna, in a bridal position and walked back to where he was. Twilight, assuming Laeyoon cared for Jaesa and had a sense of camaraderie for his allies, the latter of which being not entirely true, moved to a non-threatening position. She looked towards Starlight Glimmer and the unconscious Captain Goodking before looking back to Laeyoon.

"Since your allies have already kicked the crap out of us," Laeyoon said while looking at Twilight "How about we postpone this until we're all better and I bring everyone else with me?"

"No, but I will give you the choice to surrender."

"Surrender? Have you met me? One does not simply be appointed The Emperor's Wrath by surrendering. In fact, the reason I keep coming back after every fall is because I am so consumed with rage at the thought of anyone besting me. You think you have won, but just you wait when I have returned!"

"But what about your friends?" Twilight asked.

"If you think that my allies will convince me to bow to the likes of you, then you are gravely mistaken," Laeyoon said, "We all have our reasons to fight, loyalty to the Empire for Pierce and Quinn, bloodlust for me, Jaesa and Broonmark. I have no idea what Vette has to gain from fighting you if we meet again but I can think of a good reason."

Given how Vette was the only sane member of Laeyoon's ragtag crew, Laeyoon had difficulty thinking of a reason as to why Vette would fight. Maybe it's gratitude for Laeyoon freeing her from slavery the same way he freed Jaesa from the lies of the Jedi. Laeyoon then noticed the unconscious Rainbow Dash on the floor and turned to Pierce.

"Pierce, would you kindly hold onto Jaesa for me?"

"As you command, my lord."Pierce took Jaesa's unconscious form from Laeyoon's hands.

"Thanks, mate."

Laeyoon then used the Force to lift Rainbow Dash up and pulled her towards him, igniting his lightsaber and plunging the blade into her abdomen. The shock was enough to wake Dash up.

"No!" Twilight shouted

"Rainbow Dash!" Scootaloo cried out.

Laeyoon deactivated his lightsaber while allowing the awake but wounded Rainbow to fall onto the floor, with everyone immediately running towards her as she did so. Rainbow convulsed in pain as her friends surrounded her, concerned for their friend's health.

"I don't know what you guys are worrying about," Laeyoon said callously "I didn't stab any of her vitals. One hour in a bacta tank and she will be as right as rain."

Starlight looked up at Laeyoon and glared daggers at him. She then charged up her magic to subdue Laeyoon, but Laeyoon just rather casually gave her a Force Push that knocked her off balance, the magic shooting at the ceiling as she did so. Laeyoon turned around and made his way back to the docking bay.

"Come Pierce. While they heal their allies, it's best if we heal ours. So that way, when the time comes, we will have an even match to the death. Us lot against them lot. Sounds fair, does it not?"

Captain Goodking took a quick glance at Laeyoon casually strolling off, with Pierce following him while carrying an unconscious Jaesa.

"Uh...guys?" Goodking said "The bad guys are getting away."

"Leave them," Luna commanded "They are mere grunts."

"Yeah, well those 'mere grunts' could be good leverage!"

"You did see Kronos thrash the horn-headed one like a ragdoll, right?" Luna asked.

"Maybe they might know something about Kronos' plan."

"The horn-headed one knew nothing about what Kronos was planning."

"You know, I'm hearing 'the horn-headed one' being repeated a lot and nothing about the big guy accompanying him!" Goodking said.

"Since it's clear that the big one is subservient to the horn-headed one, chances are he is as clueless as his superior," Luna said.

"You know what, while you guys patch up Rainbow Dash, I'm gonna go after them."

Before anyone could plead with Captain Goodking to not go chasing after Laeyoon and Pierce, Goodking raised a fist and ran after them while letting out a battle cry. Meanwhile, further down the corridor, Laeyoon and Pierce are having a lovely chat.

"Do you think this Kronos fella could be trusted, my lord?" Pierce asked.

"I trust him just as much as I trust Darth Malgus," Laeyoon replied.

"So not much then."

"Depends. Do you trust Malgus?"

"Not really. There's a rumour going on that he's something of an alien sympathizer," Pierce said.

"Ahem."

"Oh, no offence, my lord!"

"None taken."

They continued walking nonchalantly down the corridor until they heard the sound of an incoming roar. Laeyoon turned around and noticed Captain Goodking charging right at them.

"Oh kriff. Pierce, run!"

And with that, Leayoon and Pierce immediately legged it to the docking bay as quick as they could. When they finally arrived back to their ship, they paced impatiently as they waited for the door to open.

"Come on, you bloody thing!" Laeyoon said frustratedly "My HoloNet connection is faster than you!"

While waiting, they noticed Goodking was now running after them on all fours and was no longer doing an overdrawn battle cry. Soon enough, the door finally opened and they ran into the ship as quickly as they could, with Pierce accidentally hitting Jaesa's head on the way in.

"Sorry, Jaesa," Pierce said.

The door slowly closed up, but not before Goodking hopped inside of the ship and leaped onto Laeyoon, who had just sat down in the pilot chair's. He slammed Laeyoon's head into the control panel a few times before he chucked Goodking off of him and onto the control panel. Captain Goodking pounced on Laeyoon as they both rolled about taking turns grabbing each other by their throats before rapidly swatting at each other with their arms.

"Get your stinking hands off me, you darn dirty alien!"

"You said the words out of my mouth, just replace 'darn dirty alien' with 'damn dirty ape'."

"Racist!" Goodking slammed Laeyoon against a wall.

"Oh, for kriff sake! If you think that's racist, just wait until you see the rest of the Sith Empire."

As the pair continued to slap at each other's hands, they failed to notice the hyperdrive going off, resulting in them flying into the back wall as the ship flew off and spun around without a pilot.

"I think I'm gonna be sick!" Goodking said.

"This is your fault!" Laeyoon shouted at Goodking.

Soon enough, the spinning eventually ceased with a sudden thud and the two being violently thrown into the front window of the ship. After that, they then continued their slap fight until they noticed a Sith Lord staring at them through the window with an unamused expression. The Sith staring at them was a human male with blue eyes, a small pointy beard, a red facial marking on one of his eyes and short, dark brown hair. His face was slightly ravaged by the dark side but not to the same extent as Malgus or Baras.

"He started it!" Laeyoon and Goodking said simultaneously while pointing at each other.

Author's Note

Heads up to anyone knew, Luna is still possessed by this bad guy named Sanies. But none of the other characters know that.

Anyway, what mysterious planet had Laeyoon and Goodking had the misfortune of crash-landing on? Find out in the next chapter in two weeks.

Chapter 15 - Welcome to Korriban

Laeyoon quickly got to his feet and pulled Goodking to his side, dragging him by one of his horns and to the door of his ship, which then fell off.

"Oh fantastic," Laeyoon muttered to himself.

Laeyoon then crawled out of the ship with Goodking in tow. He then turned towards the Sith that was staring at him and Goodking.

"How did a miserable cur such as yourself manage to make it as a Sith warrior?" the Sith said snobbishly.

"Easy, I killed Overseer Tremel and any acolytes that wished to best me. Or was it the other way around? It's amazing what time and a few concussions can do to your memory."

"Ah, so you're that Dathomirian scum Baras had for an apprenti-"

But before the Sith could say another word, he felt a tight grip at his neck. He then noticed that Laeyoon's arm was held up in a position that made it look like he was holding something.

"I would agree with that 'Dathomirian scum' comment," Laeyoon said in a serene tone. "However, my formerly sour attitude towards the Nightsisters changed when they sent me to this place to unleash my true potential as a Sith. Also, I really despise speciesism so if you could keep insulting my race to a bare minimum, that would be nice."

He then let go of the Sith he was choking and walked off, still holding onto one of Captain Goodking's horns and dragging him off with it.

"So, what's the deal with that guy?" Goodking asked.

"I'm guessing he's an overseer. It's not uncommon for overseers in the academy to not have a good opinion of those who aren't human or Sith pureblood. Ironically, I met an overseer who was, for all intents and purposes, an elitist snob, and yet he would rather let me pass than a human acolyte whose only crime is being of mixed blood."

"Then what happened?"

"I killed him under the orders of my former master and for the hell of it," Laeyoon said.

"Man! And I thought I was evil. But you, you're on a different level!"

"Thanks."

Laeyoon then turned towards his ship, which now looked like a smoking wreck covered in soot and desert sands. He felt tempted to crush the horn he was dragging Goodking along with into dust, but decided against it, feeling it would be wiser to get a shock collar on him first. He threw Goodking headfirst into the ground before sitting down and waiting for his crew, provided they are conscious, to walk out of the ship. While waiting, he let out some wind from his digestive area, with the resulting belch not going unnoticed by his captive.

"Mmph mmph mmphmmph?"

"Pardon?"

Captain Goodking pulled his head out from the ground and faced Laeyoon. "I said 'where's your manners?'."

"I'm guessing that's another thing that 'Redemption Class' has taught you."

"Kinda. It's common sense that it's pretty gross to burp and fart and not say 'excuse me' after that! Everything else, like 'please' and 'thank you' I did learn at the class."

Laeyoon sighed and then continued waiting. While waiting, a thought occurred to him.

"Might I ask why you haven't attempted to kick my arse again?" Laeyoon asked Goodking.

"I'm still a little space-sick."

"Now that you mention it, the trip here has made me a little queasy as well."

Laeyoon then let out another burp before grunting from an uncomfortable feeling.

"You know what?" Laeyoon said to Goodking "Since I've got nothing better to do, how about I give you a tour of Korriban. And if anyone asks, just say you're a lasat that wanted to be a wookie."

"I have no idea what those things are but sure," Goodking said.

Meanwhile, the rest of our heroes were busy sitting in their open cell, with Twilight tending to Rainbow Dash's wounds. Suddenly, Luna walked up to Twilight.

"If I may be so bold, might I bring Doctor Whooves with me to look for somewhere to hide? Or better yet, something to help us escape?"

"Uh...what do you need Whooves for?" Twilight asked. "Just asking for safety reasons."

"Well, since Kronos and him are from the same period of time, I assume he would be familiar with the workings of most of the technology on this ship."

Twilight turned to Whooves, who was busy observing the magic absorption rings.

"What about you, Doctor Whooves?" she said.

"Depends. Can I bring my companion with me?"

Whooves pointed to Derpy, who was staring at a wall looking wall-eyed.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Twilight asked.

"While I won't deny she's a bit...clumsy...but I can assure you she's more of a danger to other ponies, which in this context is a good thing. Right, Muffins?"

Derpy then turned towards Whooves and nodded.

"Muffins?" Luna asked, perplexed by the fact that Derpy responded to the name "Muffins".

"She doesn't really like her birth name" Whooves replied, "Given her voice and eye condition, she thinks that if ponies knew her actual name, they would think she's a bit..."

"Mentally challenged?" Luna asked insensitively.

"I was going to say ditzy. So we call her Muffins."

"Why Muffins?"

"I like muffins!" Derpy replied cheerfully as she turned her head towards Luna.

"That said," Whooves continued "She doesn't seem to mind being called Ditzy Doo. Maybe it's because it sounds like Daring Do and because she has a shapeshifting daughter named Dinky Doo.

Luna looked at Derpy before looking back at Whooves.

"What?" Whooves said.

"I think her dad was a changeling." Derpy said to Luna.

"When was your daughter conceived?" Luna asked.

"Uh...I think it was on the Winter Wrap-Up after you stopped being bad."

"As in the same year I was free from the darkness within me?"

"Yeah?"

"So, before the wedding of Princess Cadence and Shining Armor and the resulting changeling invasion?"

"I guess so?"

"In other words, before the changelings realized they can share their love?"

"Maybe?" Derpy went back to looking at the walls.

Luna just stared at Derpy in confusion. How is it that this clumsy, cross-eyed pegasus managed to have a child with a changeling, let alone a pre-metamorphosed one? But she shook her head and put on a serious expression.

"Look, we're running out of time. Are you coming or not?"

"Doc?" Derpy asked Whooves while turning her head towards him.

"I'd prefer to keep you out of harm's way, but if that incident with the flower pot, anvil, hay cart and piano are anything to go by, I'd say you are harm's way."

"How did you know about that?!" Derpy asked.

"Your former boss told me about it when you were trying to move those things from Cloudsdale."

"Wait," Twilight interrupted. "That was you who dropped those things on my head?!"

"Uh..." Derpy replied nervously before blushing and giving a sheepish grin.

Author's Note

Call-backs aplenty. :twilightsmile:

BTW, Luna is still possessed by Sanies.

Chapter 16 - An Unearthly Discovery

Luna and Whooves walked through the corridors with Derpy in tow, though she was mostly flying into the walls as she followed the other two.

"Are you certain she is a danger to others?" Luna asked Whooves.

"Well..." Whooves replied sheepishly.

Luna gave Whooves an unamused look as they continued trotting down the corridor. Soon enough, they noticed a pair of Kronos' guards walking down the other side of the corridor chatting to each other.

"Do you believe all this Seals of the Planets nonsense Kronos is on about?" One guard said.

"Well, it's a big universe out there and we have seen weirder things in Equestria," the other guard replied, "The idea of seven golden seals that can grant ponies the power of an alicorn does sound pretty neat."

"Yeah, but doesn't one of those alicorns usually get their rump whooped?"

"True, but have you seen the power of four alicorns at work? Who knows, maybe the seals can grant the user of four alicorns and a draconequus for good measure."

"Well, guess we'll find out once Kronos has all the seals in his possession."

Luna grew tired of waiting and used her magic to butt the two guards' heads against each-other, instantly knocking the two of them out. She, Whooves and Derpy then continued to travel down the corridor until they turned to their left and entered a hangar filled with spaceships, most of which were made of clockwork. There was also a big grandfather clock in the centre that told the time. When Luna stopped to look at the time, her eyes rolled up into the back of her head as she rapidly blinked, something Whooves quickly took note of.

"Princess?" Whooves said while observing Luna's still form, "Are you okay?"

Whooves then put his hoof under Luna's chin to observe her face more closely. A minute passed and Luna stopped blinking, with her eyes rolling back down.

"What happened?" Luna asked.

"I believe you were having a mild epileptic seizure," Whooves replied, "I didn't even know alicorns could have epilepsy."

"No, I don't think that was it," Luna said.

"What do you mean?"

"What if I told you there was an ancient evil in my head that I agreed to share my body with in order to find out Kronos' plan?"

"I presume that evil goes by the name of Nightmare Moon."

"No, it wasn't Nightmare Moon. It was a dragon named Sanies and he practised magic that was once used by King Sombra. My sister fought him during my banishment and we fought him together when he escaped from Tartarus. He and his master, a deformed unicorn named Sacanas, returned with an army of extraterrestrial invaders in an attempt to take over Equestria. He possessed me and forced me to trap my companions in a dream world of his design that fulfilled their greatest desires, but he used that world to torture and corrupt them. I thought he would have been gone for good when we got hit with the Elements but a part of him still managed to linger."

"I see, and Kronos knew that this Sanies was inhabiting your form?" Whooves asked.

"Since Kronos was in league with Sacanas, he informed Sanies of Kronos' plan. But, given how Sacanas' attack on Equestria was two years ago, it wouldn't be out of the question to say that Kronos might have changed the plan."

"Well, Kronos was known to be a master planner. He actually tried to launch a coup against Princess Twilight during the war. Anyway, we're getting off track here so it would probably be a wise idea for Muffins and I to hide in one of these ships."

"And what of me?" Luna asked.

"Well, since Kronos knows there's a little demon inside your head, you could just pretend to be Sanies and say we got away. Besides, I think Twilight and her friends are going to need all the help they can get."

"I'm not sure I can trust myself around them just in case Sanies uses my body to murder them when they least expect it."

"Well, there's more of them than there is of me and Muffins here. After all, Muffins and I have been on many dangerous adventures before and came out relatively unscathed. I'm sure we can easily handle ourselves. Allons-y."

As Luna walked out of the hangar in order to find out where Twilight and her friends were, Whooves and Derpy looked around to look for a ship to hide in. But they had to pick a ship that was unlikely to be entered by any of Kronos' forces any time soon. And that's when they came across something that didn't look like any conventional spaceship. Rather, it looked like a big chrome canister with two doors on the front. Whooves wondered what it could be, but since time was ticking, he and his companion quickly hid in the shiny canister thing. When they entered, they noticed to their surprise how big and roomy it was on the inside, even though the colours were extremely bland. Both Whooves and Derpy looked on in awe at how massive it is on the inside.

"Great wickering stallions!" Whooves exclaimed, "My entire understanding of physical space has been transformed! Three-dimensional Euclidean geometry has been torn up, thrown in the air and snogged to death! My grasp of the universal constants of physical reality has been changed... forever!"

"Huh?" Derpy said, for she was in as much awe as Whooves and wasn't listening to what he had just said.

"Or in laypony terms, Sweet Celestia! It's bigger on the inside than it is on the outside!"

Derpy then smiled and nodded, then flew around to observe the various buttons and levers on the console in the centre of the room. She then had a sudden urge to press every single button. And so she did, much to Whooves' concern.

"Uh...Muffins? I don't think that's such a good idea."

But before he could say any more, there was a noise. A noise that stopped Derpy from pushing the buttons, since she wondered where that noise came from.

VWORP! VWORP!

And soon enough, they were off, with their vehicle dematerializing and then spinning off into the far reaches of time and space.

Author's Note

Well, it's about time Doctor Whooves got into a TARDIS. And yes, his 'bigger on the inside' moment does reference a bit during Peter Capaldi's turn as The Doctor.

Chapter 17 - The Dude and The Doctor

The vessel Whooves and Derpy stowed away on made its way to what appeared to be a prison. And as it did so, it rematerialized not as the shiny cylindrical shape it was, but rather something that looked like a police box. Whooves then exited the police box as he observed his surroundings. The sky looked like there was going to be rain and the ground was dark and mossy. The wall of the buildings were also a rather dull white. He was then approached by a pony in bright white armour and helmet that had a fish-like shape to it and an unusual visor.

"G'day, mate. Welcome to the Sanctum of Containment," the pony in white greeted Whooves. "What brings you to this multidimensional prison?"

"Excuse me, sir, but do you know a way back to Equestria?" Whooves asked.

"Sure, it's in the room with all the mirrors. But I must warn you, there has been a riot and most, if not all, of the prisoners have escaped." The pony then handed Whooves what looked to be a gun. "It's dangerous to go alone. Take this."

"I'd rather not. I don't use guns."

Whooves then turned towards Derpy.

"Muffins, stay inside that contraption where it is safe. Oh, and for the love of Celestia, don't press any more buttons."

"Will do, Doc!" Derpy said with a salute.

Whooves then made his way into the prison. The floors had a checkerboard tile pattern, but the tiles were all dirty and mouldy, and the walls were still the dull white they were on the outside but with an extra sprinkling of mould here and there. Everything also reeked faintly of urine and faecal matter. Most of the cells were empty, their steel doors being left open for half of them. The other half of the cells Whooves observed had their doors sealed shut, as if the prisoners who escaped were courteous enough to close the doors after them. Whooves spent most of the walk looking over his shoulder in a worry, and then he heard what sounded like a guitar lick followed by a violin. Whooves then took a few steps back and noticed a red unicorn with a messy dark red mane and tail sitting on a stool. He was also using a laptop that was resting on a wooden desk. The unicorn then noticed Whooves' presence and turned towards him.

"Hello there," the unicorn said while giving Whooves a cheery smile.

“Hello to you, pony...” Whooves said, eyeing him warily.

After that awkward meeting, they walked down the corridor to make their way to the mirror room.

"You've got to help me, sir," Whooves said, "There's this megalomaniacal time-travelling unicorn by the name of Kronos and he wants to collect seven talking space seals called the Seals of the Planets!"

"Ooh, well, that sounds like fun but I think I'll just stick with serving my sentence," the unicorn replied.

"How did you get thrown in prison anyway?" Whooves asked.

"I may have had a one-sided crush on Fleur Dis Lee and maybe stalked her,” the unicorn said, “She may have filed a restraining order against me and I may have used an illegal mind-control spell to live out my sexual fantasies."

The unicorn then laughed nervously as Whooves gives him a mortified look. They then stopped in their tracks when an alarm started blaring and a group of ponies in white armour made their way down using some ziplines.

"Gentlecolts," Whooves said, addressing the armoured ponies.

"On your knees," one of them said, pointing a gun at him.

"Don't bother," the unicorn said to Whooves, "They've been bribed by this Sith Lord called Décortiquer into keeping me here. Chances are they probably use that money to bet on each-other in hoof wrestling contests. But on the bright side, it gives me something fun to do."

The unicorn cracked his neck and let out a low chuckle before punching one of the armoured ponies in the face and pushing another one off the platform they were on. He then used one of their guns to shoot some more of them dead before charging at another one and snapping his neck. The unicorn felt a telekinetic pull that sent him falling down one of the lower levels, where he was face to face with a robotic pony. The robot pony charged at him and started choking him. The unicorn tried to fight back but was repeatedly bitch-slapped by the robot pony. That was enough to trigger a burning sensation in the unicorn, one he was eager to share with the robot pony and the armoured ponies that accompanied it. He released himself from the robot pony's grasp with a magical explosion before violently killing the other armoured ponies, laughing dementedly as he did so. He then stopped his carnage when he noticed Whooves looking on in horror.

"Great wickering stallions!" Whooves cried out.

"Yeah, I may have a sadistic side to me."

They then made their way to the mirror room, where Whooves could make his way back to Equestria.

"Well, it's been fun but I better get going. Allons-y," Whooves said.

But as Whooves made his way to the mirror, he and the unicorn heard mechanical laughter behind them.

"Going somewhere?" the mechanical voice said.

The unicorn and Whooves looked at where the voice came from. They were face-to-face with a white unicorn wearing a skull-like mask made of metal and a grey cloak. The masked unicorn also had purple eyes and a spiky mane.

"We meet again, Décortiquer," the red unicorn addressed the white one.

Décortiquer then pulled out a cylindrical device which emitted a blade that appeared to be made entirely of light.

"Indeed we do, Lion Dude," Décortiquer said to the red unicorn.

"Wait a minute, did he say your name was Lion Dude?" Whooves asked Lion.

"Indeed he did," Lion said,

"I must say Muffins is a big fan of your work! Although personally, I think your earlier works needed a bit of improvement. Too much emphasis on random gags and fourth-wall breaking."

Décortiquer gave Lion Dude an odd look.

"Oh yeah," Lion Dude said to Décortiquer, "Before the whole Fleur Dis Lee incident and before I crossed paths with you, I used to be a writer that specialized in comedy. Though I did make exceptions to my usual comedic style of writing, like that post-apocalyptic alternate history that was written during the time King Sombra returned and nearly mind-controlled everypony."

"Now that one, I liked," Whooves said.

"Thank you," Lion Dude replied.

Décortiquer started to grow impatient and lifted Whooves up in order to throw him into the mirror back into Equestria, only for him to get unceremoniously swallowed up by what appeared to be a monster made of bread. And following pursuit of the bread monster was Derpy. Whooves quickly fell back onto the floor.

"Blast it all, Muffins! I told you to wait in the contraption we hijacked!"

"Yeah, but I was getting worried, so I came here to find you. And I made a new friend along the way."

Derpy pointed towards a pegasus that looked like a stallion version of her but in a red soldier's uniform getting chucked about by the bread monster's tentacles, with the stallion laughing as the monster did so.

"I TELEPORTED BREEEEEEAAAAAD!!!!" the stallion loudly announced as he was chucked about some more by the bread monster.

"Well," Lion Dude said with a shrug, "the DJ PON-3 festivals were fun, but now I’m paying for it."

Author's Note

This chapter was based on an SFM animation I made:

https://www.twitch.tv/videos/393933552

And yes, Lion Dude's writing career isn't that different from my time on FiMFiction.

Chapter 18 - The Tomb of Tulak Hord

While giving Goodking a tour of Korriban, Laeyoon lead him to a big blocky entrance with ancient yet alien runes written across the hinges. And above the entrance was a statue of what appeared to be a person resting in a coffin.

"This is the tomb of Tulak Hord." Laeyoon told Goodking "The Lord of Hate, The Master of the Gathering Darkness and, although he is nothing in comparison to Darth Nihilus, a personal idol of mine. He was the greatest lightsaber duelist of the Sith Lords of old, with none to match him at the time."

"Yeah, real great, does this guy have any treasures?"

"Of course. I'll show you."

Laeyoon and Goodking then walked into the tomb. The bottom of the walls of the tomb were filled with the same engravings that were on the entrance. Unlike the entrance, the inside of the tomb had less of a desert-y feel and looked more like a cave. As they walked, they noticed a human male with brown balding hair and a hoodie on inspecting one of the many ancient coffins of the tomb. Goodking then walked towards the man.

"Yo, what're you looking at?" Goodking asked the man.

"My lord, allow me to approach." the man said "The wind outside has torn my ears to tatters and my eyes have grown strained and bloody in the dark. I've studied this tomb for years. Slept on its stones and dreamed of its depths. Now, I need assistance to solve its final mystery."

"Well, I wouldn't really call myself a lord, but I got this guy with me who says he's a 'Dark Lord of the Sith', whatever that is."

Goodking then pointed towards Laeyoon who gave both Goodking and the man an odd look.

"I don't dig through dirt for scholars" Laeyoon said defensively.

"Then you misunderstand the chance I am offering." the man said to Laeyoon "his tomb is the final resting place of Tulak Hord. The tomb's maze was built to his precise specifications. But he built his maze to hold more than just his body. He built it to secure his greatest creation. His terrible machine. The Red Engine."

"Why are you telling this to me?"

"Because I need you, his machine needs you. The machine was his life's work, a perfect puzzle had hid all his secrets, it was a vault and a library all at once. The scholars in the Academy, they say the Red Engine was never completed. They say it never functioned. But I know how it works and I know how to fuel it."

"Then why not inform the scholars?"

"They think that I, not a Sith nor an educated man, couldn't find the truth. They ignore my findings and are blinded by arrogance. Listen now, Anyone can activate the Red Engine, but unless it receives its sacrifice, it will only sputter and die. The machine needs blood and hatred to become fully operational. If a Sith could slay the tomb's beasts in its presence, their deaths would be its fuel. Find the machine within the tomb. Work its mechanisms. And when at last, it reveals Tulak Hord's secrets, I beg of you - bring me its scripture. Bring me the knowledge I have dreamed of."

"Well" Goodking said while giving a stretch "I'm not one for creepy tombs but I've been learning to be a good person so what d'ya say? We help this guy out?"

Goodking then turns his head towards Laeyoon.

"As long as I get to kill things, I'm content" Laeyoon said "Although it would be preferable if it were something more than mere beasts."

Goodking and Laeyoon then walked further into the tomb, where one of the hallways were guarded by sentries and overseer droids. There were also slaves cleaning the stone floors of the tomb. The further they walked, they came across a hallway with skeletons in the centre, a sight that freaked Goodking out.

"Woah, that's spooky!" Goodking said as he jumped and held onto Laeyoon's shoulders.

"You reek of fear" Laeyoon said in an annoyed tone.

"Not yet but I feel a lot of fear coming and you better get out of the way when it does!"

Laeyoon then threw Goodking off of him and the both of them continued to walk down further. They then entered the Ruined Atrium, which was inhabited with more guard droids, troops and slaves. Sensing that the troops have gone rogue and reprogrammed the droids and freed the slaves, Laeyoon then treaded carefully, making sure none of them spotted him. While he was perfectly willing to kill people, dealing with mere slaves, droids and grunts with blasters have left him desensitized to the point that it was less of a fun occasion and more of a nuisance. Goodking and Laeyoon then entered the machine vault, where they saw the Red Engine chamber. As they walked further into the chamber, they saw an ancient machine in front of them.

"This must be this Red Engine the man was on about" Laeyoon said to Goodking before cracking his knuckles "Stand back and let the master do his work."

Laeyoon then channelled dark side energy into the machine, which summoned a group of very angry k'lor'slugs. Goodking then screamed at the sight of the ugly creatures. Laeyoon then quickly grabbed his lightsaber and sprun into action, slicing through the k'lor'slugs like a hot knife through butter. And in the span of less than a minute, the beasts were no more. Laeyoon then deactivated his lightsaber and gave Goodking an annoyed look.

"Please don't tell me you screamed like a little girl at the sight of mere bugs."

"You call those things bugs?! I've seen bees that looked cuter than those. By the way, don't tell anyone about this. I want to keep up my brave hero image because it's good for business and, apart from this incident, I am genuinely brave."

"I find that hard to believe, especially since you were scared by mere skeletons earlier."

"Hey, I have dealt with my share of beasts as well! Know a guy named Sanies?"

"No."

"Well, he's this big scary dragon sorcerer that can mess with people's minds and turn people into stone."

"...That's it?" Laeyoon scoffed. "I killed a Voice of the Emperor. A mere sorcerer is child's play."

Laeyoon then walked towards the Red Engine, which had opened up to reveal an ancient tablet written in Aurabesh, which surprised Laeyoon since he would have assumed the tablet would have been in a much older language. He picked up the tablet and inside was a golden seal with a heart-shaped symbol on it's chest.

"What the hell?" Laeyoon said, looking at the seal.

Goodking then walked towards Laeyoon was looking at.

"Hey" Goodking said "I've seen one of those things before, the onlyonly difference is that it had a helmet on."

And then he and Goodking then heard a teleporting sound behind them. They turned around and noticed Kronos standing there with a smirk on his face.

"That is the Seal of Beauty. I suppose the reason it's here is because a place filled with hatred and ugly creatures would be the perfect hiding spot."

"You would never expect it," Goodking said. "It's like the Spaneighsh Inquisition."

"Well, either that or those things are beautiful in their own way," Laeyoon butted in. "It's a matter of perspective, really."

Kronos then used his magic on the seal to telekinetically hold it in place.

"Quickly!" Kronos barked at Laeyoon "Help me hold the seal down before it escapes again."

"Since I don't want another beating like you were my father or something, sure."

Laeyoon then held his hand out and used the Force to hold the seal in place. He would have choked it but he assumed Kronos wanted all the seals alive. While focusing on the seal, he looked towards Goodking, who was slowly walking backwards towards a rock.

"Kronos?" Laeyoon said casually.

"Yes?" Kronos said in a similarly casual tone.

"What do we do with the weird lasat - wookie - wampa looking thing?"

"Oh, you mean Captain Goodking? Kill him."

"What?!" Goodking shouted in surprise.

Laeyoon then picked up his lightsaber and hurled it at Goodking's direction. The blade ignited and went straight through Goodking's heart. While Laeyoon could have easily choked Goodking to death, he was too busy focusing on the seal. Goodking then started to feel woozy and then eventually fell to the floor as everything faded to black.

Author's Note

Egads! Captain Goodking has been wounded! What will happen next?

Find out in the next two weeks.

Chapter 19 - An Unlikely Ally

Goodking woke up somewhere. Where exactly he wasn’t too sure. His vision was blurry, but he could make out what appeared to be wheels of fortune and a pink carpet. When his vision cleared a bit more, he looked to his right and noticed a red unicorn wielding a large staff. As his vision got more clearer, the unicorn looked stranger, yet more familiar. They had three horns instead of the usual one and the stick they were holding was the Staff of Sacanas. And that's when everything clicked.

"Rise and shine, sleepyhead!" Sacanas said in a singsong voice. "Half the universe is probably dead."

"Hey, wait a minute! Aren't you supposed to be dead?!" Goodking shouted at Sacanas. "I saw you get vaporized with the Elements!"

"Yeah, about that..."

Sacanas woke up in a dark cave. His head throbbed with pain like he had the worst hangover of his life, and his body felt as cold as a block of ice. He observed his surroundings and noticed a blue ram standing to the left of him. It took him a while to get up and talk to the ram.

"Goat's cheese!" Sacanas spouted nonsensically, which earned him an odd look from the ram.

"Do you know who you are?" the ram asked Sacanas.

Sacanas shook his head, not because he couldn't remember but because he was trying to clear his head. And then he recognized the ram standing beside him.

"Grogar! Haha! I knew you were real! All the teachers at Magic Kindergarten and the School for Gifted Unicorns told me you were nothing more than a fairy but I knew you were real! I ought to know, I taught my own apprentice some of your spells. Now, what were you saying?"

"I asked if you knew who you were."

"Oh, of course. My name is Sacanas. Big fan of your work." Sacanas held his hoof out in a friendly manner, with Grogar just scowling at it.

"So...since I've been out of it for a while, you know, courtesy of being dead, would you kindly give me an update on what's going on nowadays?"

"There is a princess by the name of Twilight Sparkle,” Grogar said. “She and her friends have worked together and used the Elements of Harmony to defeat many would-be conquerors, including yourself."

"Oh yeah! Now it's coming back to me. This Kronos fellow paused time and pulled me from the moment of my death and sent me to this time. Then I got hit with the elements and sent back to where I died. Timey-wimey stuff, amiright?" Sacanas inhaled in an exaggerated manner. "By the way, how's Sanies? Still in pieces like last time?"

"If you are suggesting I resurrect that dragon, then you are gravely mistaken," Grogar said.

"Yeah, good call. If we let him have his way, there wouldn't be much of Equestria to conquer. In fact, me and Kronos were planning on betraying him after we had taken care of Celestia, and her little allies too."

"Would you just listen to me for five minutes?!” Grogar bellowed, getting Sacanas to shut his mouth. “I have an offer for you."

"If it's to join your little villain club, I'm afraid I'll have to decline," Sacanas said.

Grogar just stared at Sacanas blankly. "What?"

"I can read minds, Grogar! Besides, being dead changes a pony, you know. And for every villain Twilight and her friends defeat, there are those who have decided to turn over a new leaf. I mean, they have Discord on their side for Celestia's sake! Bucking Discord!"

"You know, it's funny you should mention Discord."

Grogar then proceeded to shift forms, growing taller and more slender, his bones cracking as he did so. His horns morphed from a pair of ram horns into a deer antler and a horn of some other animal, most likely an antelope or something. His colour went from a blue to a mismatched variety of colours as his entire body became mismatched in its parts. Sacanas was no longer staring at Grogar. It was Discord.

"Surprise!" Discord said jovially.

"Not really," Sacanas deadpanned. "I knew it was you and mentioned your name specifically so you would reveal yourself."

"Well, aren't you the spoilsport. So, Mr Unoriginal OC Bad Guy Sir, what made you want to change your ways and join Team Harmony?" Discord asked.

"Is that what you and your friends call yourselves now? Team Harmony?"

"It's a name in progress. Oh, and ex-villains like Starlight Glimmer, Tempest Shadow and Captain Goodking, you remember him, right? They are all part of this wonderful team!"

"Let me guess, you have this Villains Anonymous program that they are a part of."

Discord snapped his fingers, making Sacanas' horns disappear.

"Hey! Give those back!" Sacanas shouted.

"Only if you promise to stop reading my mind. It's difficult to be chaotic if somepony can tell what you're going to do."

"Your precious Fluttershy does it. What difference does it make if I do it?" Sacanas asked.

"Because Fluttershy and I are friends! More than friends, come to think of it. If somepony who is more than friends can predict what you are going to do, then they deserve their place as being more than a friend."

"Fine then.” Sacanas raised his hoof in front of him. “I, Sacanas, solemnly swear to not use my magic to read your mind while we have this little discussion of ours."

"Promise?"

"Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye."

"Pinkie Promise?" Discord added.

"I don't know what that is but sure."

Discord snapped his fingers again to give Sacanas his horns back.

"Thank you. Instead, I can do this." Sacanas conjured up an illusion of Fluttershy and Discord sharing an embrace in a glowing pink loveheart.

"Fluttershy and Discord, sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S-I-N-G."

"Unless one of us is the tree, which, contrary to popular belief, would be me in this case, if you know what I mean. Wink wink, nudge nudge."

Sacanas grimaced as his illusion faded away. "Well, that's a mental image I didn't need."

Both Discord and Sacanas shared a hearty laugh.

"And then we had a cider and a laugh about how he once turned Fluttershy cruel during his villain days,” Sacanas said to Goodking. “And since there was a vacant spot in a casino his cousin owned and I have a flair for hiding things up my proverbial sleeves, he gave me that spot. Oh, and for some reason he was talking about how suddenly, instead of lampooning how common it is for bad guys to turn over a new leaf in this day and age, we are instead playing it straight and unironically. I had no idea what he meant by that but then, this hairy lion-ape thing from the sky gave an obscene gesture our way."

The hairy ape thing was me, the narrator/Leondude, by the way.

"And that's how I put my past behind me and became a good guy." Sacanas then fiddled with his staff before noticing Goodking snoring loudly. He must have fallen asleep from Sacanas telling his story. Sacanas jabbed his staff into the burn wound the lightsaber left in Goodking's chest.

"Yeow!" Goodking cried out.

"Didn't anypony ever tell you it's rude to fall asleep when someone's telling you a story?!"

"I was resting my eyes!" Goodking said.

"Baloney!"

"You were at the part about a talking blue goat, right?."

"That was ten minutes ago!"

"Wait, you have been ranting for ten minutes?!"

"Have you ever been to a lecture?” Sacanas said. “There are ponies that ramble on more than I do! Anyway, I became good buddies with Discord because of our fondness of playing tricks on ponies and, long story short, he allowed me to run this casino in his cousin's absence."

Sacanas then waved about his staff, nearly hitting Goodking on the head as he did so.

"By the way, you got to be really careful using this thing. Apparently, visitors from another world borrowed it to clean up the mess you made in their world because of you messing about in your world. Then they gave it back and the princesses then gave it to Scorpan to guard. And I think we knew what happened next, didn't we?"

"Yeah, that's nice. What am I doing here, exactly?" Goodking asked.

"Oh yeah, we needed an extra guy to guard the Seal of Wealth."

Sacanas led Goodking down to a room. And in that room was a golden seal with a dollar sign on its chest. The seal burped out a small pile of coins, which glittered like they were made of solid gold.

"Well, that explains it," Goodking deadpanned.

Author's Note

Revenge of the Fifth, mother-kriffers!

Chapter 20 - Battle Royale

Kronos and Laeyoon, along with a few acolytes they picked up from the Sith Academy under the pretence of "extra credit", levitated the Seal of Beauty into a chamber within the control room of the Entropy and sealed the chamber shut. The seal tried to do what it did the last time to escape but with no luck, as the chamber used its magic against it and zapped it unconscious. Kronos then turned towards a monitor that showed Twilight and her friends making their way towards them.

"Oh look, our prisoners are free from their shackles," Kronos said while looking at Laeyoon in a troll-ish manner, "Would you care to explain why that is?"

"You missed one," Laeyoon deadpanned.

"Did I? Oh, how clumsy of me."

"I would have been capable of imprisoning them but I didn't have my spare lightsaber at the time and Jaesa was wounded. I could take them on now but my crew are still on the ship."

Kronos then charged up some magic and, in a blinding light, managed to teleported Broonmark, Jaesa, Pierce and Vette next to him.

"You were saying?"

"Uh...thanks?" Laeyoon then turned towards Jaesa and Pierce. "I trust you two are better now."

"Show me who to kill," Jaesa said with enthusiasm.

"Let's hit 'em hard!" Pierce responded with more enthusiasm.

"Good," Laeyoon said before addressing his other party members, "Oh, and if you're wondering what happened, Kronos teleported you guys here. Hopefully, you weren't doing anything that required your immediate attention."

"I was thinking of watching the HoloNews but sure, I'll go with the whole 'getting teleported out of nowhere' thing," Vette deadpanned.

"Quite the tongue on this one," Kronos commented. "I can see why you like her".

Laeyoon glared at Kronos while gesturing to Jaesa and placing a finger on his mouth.

"Shh, not around Jaesa! She'll murder Vette when she gets the chance!" Laeyoon forcefully whispers to Kronos.

"Enough talk. When do we kill?" Broonmark said in the Talz language.

"I agree with Broonmark," Laeyoon announced, "Less chatting, more killing."

And with that, Laeyoon immediately walked out the door with his companions in tow. Now all they had to do was figure out where the hell those pesky little ponies are. But luckily for them, they did not have to look far. After wandering through corridor after corridor, they came across a familiar group of ponies, big and small. Along with the ponies he is supposed to kill, two of Kronos' guards were standing on each side of the corridor holding a spear each. Perhaps when Laeyoon is done, he could thank the guards for not stealing his kills. He also noticed Rainbow Dash had gotten better from the stab wound Laeyoon inflicted on her earlier. He then faced Princess Twilight dead on.

"Ah, we meet again at last!" Laeyoon said to the group. "When me and my companions left you, we were but learners. But now, we are masters!"

Laeyoon channelled Dark Side energies to increase his physical strength ever so slightly. He then injected a stim into his leg that increased his presence in the Force. He could feel the awesome power of the dark side surging through him, ready to tear the little ponies before him into nothing. He grabbed his lightsaber, ignited it and lunged at his opponents while letting out an eldritch battlecry. His attack was blocked by a spear taken from one of the guards. Noticing a purple aura around the spear and Twilight's horn, he made the connection that Twilight was the one that took the guards spear with her magic.

"Hmm," Laeyoon said while examining the spear "I did not know those things were lightsaber-proof. Gotta give Kronos credit where credit is due."

During the clash, Laeyoon tried to push Twilight back with the Force, but it pushed him back instead. Rather than fall flat on his arse, he braced himself and slid backwards on his feet, leaving a trail on the translucent ground. He looked behind him and turned around to notice Broonmark and Jaesa pointing their weapons at Vette, Pierce pointing his gun at Broonmark, and Vette pointing her gun at Jaesa.

"What are you idiots doing?!" Laeyoon asked with a dumbfounded expression on his face.

"Twi'lek says aliens too cute to be threat," Broonmark said in his native language. "We disagree".

"Broonmark, it's bad enough that humans in the empire use the A-word," Laeyoon said.

"Apologies. Habit we picked up from traitor Quinn."

"Yeah, I'll be having words with him next time I see him, along with my hands around his throat."

"Wait!" Rainbow Dash interrupted Laeyoon and Broonmark's conversation, "You can understand that thing?!"

"Thing?!" Laeyoon and Broonmark shouted in unison, with Broonmark saying it in his native tongue.

"First of all," Laeyoon started off, "Calling a sentient a 'thing' is probably even worse than calling them an alien. Second of all, you have to know different languages when you're a Sith Lord, you know."

"Like that time you called Quinn an asshole in Huttese?" Vette asked.

Laeyoon then looked at Vette, surprised she heard him say that since he did it under his breath. "It's kind of like that but that's not the point. The point is why are you trying to defend our enemies?"

"It was more of a funny comment that Broonmark and Jaesa took seriously. You know what my humour's like."

"Of course. That's what I find so attractive about you, well, apart from the physical stuff.” Laeyoon turned to Pierce. “And what about you, Pierce?"

"He was going to chop her head off," Pierce responded.

Laeyoon shrugged. "Fair enough."

Laeyoon deactivated his lightsaber, placed it back on his belt, and clapped his hands to get his allies' attention. "Right then, break it up, you lot. If this turns out to be a relatively easy kill for us as a group, we owe Vette an apology. But if this turns out to be quite the challenge, then um...ah, kriff it. Let's dance!"

Everyone immediately got into a fighting position, except for Pinkie Pie, who spontaneously pulled out a guitar and a pick from thin air. He started playing a catchy rhythm as everyone glared at their respective opponents. And as Laeyoon charged at Twilight again, but with his allies following suit this time, Pinkie let out an "Ah-ah, ah!", which she later repeated as Twilight and Laeyoon clashed weapons again. When the conflict really heated up, she started singing about how she and the others come from a land of ice and snow, from the midnight sun, where hot springs flow.

Rainbow Dash flew at her opponents and pushed them back by spinning at a high velocity before zooming around and giving Pierce and Broonmark multiple punches and kicks to every part of their bodies, mostly in their faces. She was then stopped in her tracks by Jaesa force-choking her, slamming her head multiple times into the wall until she fell unconscious. Jaesa unleashed devastating force-storms that struck Luna, Starlight, Rarity and Sweetie Belle, but they all deflected it with a collectively created magic shield. She then charged towards Luna and tried to strike her down with her lightsaber, but Luna managed to block it by creating a magical construct that looked like a glowing blue sword. Pierce aimed his blaster at Pinkie Pie but was knocked out cold by Starlight, who was using whatever combat spells she could use to her advantage, mainly one that could pause time at temporary intervals. Starlight then used the same spell Luna was using to block an attack from Broonmark.

Meanwhile, after parrying some of Laeyoon's lightsaber attacks, Twilight's walked back while holding the spear, with Laeyoon walking towards her with a predatory smile before swinging his lightsaber even more before their respective weapons were locked in a power struggle. While struggling against Twilight's weapon, he looked towards the two guards that were standing there, with one of them holding a juice box and slurping it while watching the fight unfolding before them.

"A little help would be nice!" Laeyoon shouted.

"Just wait for our boss to show up!" one of the guards bluntly replied.

Author's Note

When Laeyoon was duelling Twilight, I may have taken inspiration from this scene:

Chapter 21 - A Meeting of Two Evil Unicorns

Kronos sat at his chair in the control room and watched the fight between Laeyoon and his allies against Twilight and her friends. Noticing that Laeyoon and his allies were getting their arses handed to them, Kronos decided to take matters into his own hooves.

"Donkey!" he called out.

Cowardly Donkey quickly ran through into the control room as quick as his legs could carry him.

"Yes, master?" Cowardly Donkey asked anxiously.

"Would you kindly keep an eye on the seals in my absence? Oh, and summon more guards here while you're at it too."

"Right away, master!"

Kronos then made his way to the battle royale going on between the corridors of the ship. When he arrived, he quickly cast a spell that froze all of time. He looked at the still scene and noticed Laeyoon roaring at Twilight, Starlight shooting a blast of magic at Broonmark, Pierce being hit on the head with his own helmet by the Cutie Mark Crusaders, Jaesa duelling Luna. He then casually trotted towards Luna and tapped her on the head to activate the spell that allowed Sanies to take control of her. And as he did so, he hummed a tune that sounded like a song that was about saving time in a bottle and what one would do with it. He then used his magic to levitate Starlight and carry her to one of the anti-magic chambers he has on the ship. As he sealed the chamber door and unpaused time, Starlight charged into one of the walls, thinking she was still in the battle. When she noticed her surroundings, she tried to use her magic, but with little result. Kronos walked over to a speaker attached to the chamber.

"Don't bother using your magic. This chamber was specifically made to stop anypony inside from using magic."

"If so, then why didn't you put us in one of these?" Starlight asked in a dry tone.

"Because, my little pony, I expect you and your friends to have better luck finding the seals than me and my forces have for months. All I had to do was manipulate events in a way that will have you and your friends steal one of my ships in an attempt to escape and then do a few subtle manipulations here and there to get you to land to where I would assume one of the seals would be. Complex, I know. But the last time I tried to get one of the seals on my own, it buggered off before I had the chance to catch it."

Kronos then tilted his head and looked at Starlight inquisitively.

"Have we met before?"

"What do you mean?"

"I swear I was trying to persuade a pony such as yourself to join my side. Let me think, where have I seen a face like yours before?"

It was another day of spying on Twilight and her friends as Starlight plotted her revenge. She hid in a bush and watched through her binoculars as they talked. Her hatred for them burned even more when she noticed they had the spirit of chaos and disharmony himself for a friend. How the Tartarus is that even possible? Although she did find some satisfaction in seeing Twilight's befuddlement. And then she heard a noise.

"Life's not fair, is it?" a male voice said.

Starlight turned around and noticed a grey bulky unicorn with a black slicked-back mane and a goatee. He also had a pair of yellow snake-like eyes and a cutie mark in the shape of a clock.

"Shh!" Starlight went at the unicorn "Could you keep it down?! I'm trying to figure out the source of their friendship!"

"Oh, don't worry. They're not going to hear you. I took the liberty of pausing time so we can have a private chat."

Starlight looked at Twilight and her friends and noticed they were paused in one position.

"Oh, but where are my manners?" the unicorn said "My name is Kronos. I am what is referred to as a Time-Turner. That means I specialize in magic that involves time travel."

"What do want from me?"

"Nothing much. I believe our goals align. Plus, just between the two of us, I don't like that Princess Twilight either."

Kronos opened up a portal with his magic, with the portal showing a translucent hallway with cogs and gears in the walls.

"I have something to show you. And trust me when I say you're going to like it."

Kronos then lead Starlight through the portal and into the cog-themed corridor. As they walked, they engaged in some small talk.

"I heard you're a fan of equality, Starlight."

"If anypony is different, then there's going to be arguments. And then they will start to hate each other. Or worse, somepony goes on a different path to you because of their differences!"

"I know the feeling. I used to have a friend I did stuff together with as well. We even had what appeared to be the same destiny. But sadly, there was one small difference between us that ended our friendship."

"What's that?"

"He had a conscience," Kronos said bitterly.

Starlight couldn't help but be unnerved by what Kronos had said. What did he mean by his friend having a conscience? Does that mean she's walking around with a sociopath? She may have done some things that haunt her dreams but they were all in the name of maintaining harmony. What did Kronos do that horrified his friend? But she quickly brushed it off. After all, being acquainted with Kronos is bound to be the lesser of two evils in comparison to being friends with Discord.

"What happened?" Starlight asked nervously.

"I'd rather not say. Wouldn't want anyone to think of our reasons for separating to be, oh I don't know, petty. Besides, I'm sure your reasons against differences are better than mine."

"I'd rather not get into it."

"What's the matter? Don't trust me?"

"I could ask the same about you."

"I trust you enough to know we have the same goals. Tell you what, you tell me your reasons and I'll tell you mine. Do we have a deal?"

Starlight then lowered her head and closed her eyes, trying to hold back tears.

"You really wanna know? Fine! I had a friend that did everything with me. I can't even remember a time where we were apart. But then he just had to get his cutie mark before I did! And then he got sent off to Canterlot, leaving me alone for the rest of my life!"

Kronos tried to stifle back laughter, only to let it all out and fall to the floor on his side.

"That's why you don't like cutie marks?! Because your friend had one before you did?! Oh, this is too good! Ha! And they say I'm petty."

Starlight levitated Kronos and angrily pinned him against the wall.

"It wasn't funny!" Starlight tearfully yelled out.

"But it is!" Kronos said while chortling "Clearly, you never asked your parents for playdates. Surely, they can make the trip to Canterlot. Or have you ever thought about sending him letters and postcards? There's a thing called "long-distance relationships", you know."

"Shut up!"

Starlight swung her hoof right into Kronos' jaw before doing so repeatedly, only stopping because she was slowly getting exhausted. She let Kronos go from her telekinetic grasp.

"I admit, I probably deserved that. After all, it's hard to make allies by taking the mick out their past. I mean, my friend suffered more than you ever did. But enough of that, let's continue."

Starlight then reluctantly followed Kronos to where he was leading her. If he turns out to be as bad as she suspects him of being, regardless if they have the same goals or not, she will not hesitate to turn on him. They then made it their destination, with Kronos opening a door to a room and letting Starlight inside. And what she saw confirmed everything she knew about Kronos.

Author's Note

🎵If Kronos could spend time in a bottle, 🎵
🎵The first thing he'd like to do, 🎵
🎵Is to save every day, 🎵
🎵'Til eternity passes away, 🎵
🎵Ruling the universe🎵

Also, I really enjoyed writing the bit with Kronos laying a verbal smackdown on Starlight's arse. :rainbowlaugh:

Chapter 22 - One Reformed, One Not

Starlight stared in horror at what Kronos had shown her. There were rows of unconscious ponies lying on their fronts on bloodied operating tables be delicately cut open from the back by machines from above. Then the machine lowered its claws onto their exposed brains and spinal cords and slowly removed them before moving them towards empty shells that resembled ponies. The shells were blank white in colour, with black joints and a few lines that indicated there were parts that could be opened. The "faces" of the shells resembled the helmets that were worn by King Sombra's forces. There was an open panel going from the back of the empty shell to the back of its "head". The machines then inserted the brains and spinal cords into these shells using the open panels before closing them. And then a pair of tubes were inserted through the "eyes" of the shells and filled the shells with a grey liquid.

"Perhaps I should tell you why Whooves and I stopped being friends," Kronos said in a tone that sounded friendly but felt there was something missing. "Once upon a time, I started a war with the Realm Ravagers in order to gain the favour of the Seal of War and the Seal of Business. I told Whooves about it but rather than be supportive of my ambitions, he called me a monster and ran. Maybe it's because I accidentally sent him to the time of this war when we were foals. And then he told Princess Twilight about my plan and had me exiled. But I was not alone. I had a few followers that were willing to join me in exile and so we went off around the cosmos to look for the rest of the Seals. But since that good help is hard to find, yet easily killed, me and my forces travelled around time and space and made some new friends along the way, whether they wanted to be friends or not. Mostly not."

"You're sick!" Starlight shouted out in a mix of disgust and fear. "How could you do that to these innocent ponies?!"

"How could I not? Besides, I don't know what you're getting so upset about. Isn't this what you wanted? The only way to be equal is if we all had the same mind and body."

"No! I'm nothing like you!"

"Really?" Kronos tilted his head. "Last time I checked, you were a cult leader with an affinity for brainwashing. How is that different from me converting these ponies to a higher form?"

"Go to Tartarus! Don't you dare compare me to you! I was trying to make everyone equal until those meddling ponies showed up! What you're doing is murder!"

"Well that was uncalled for," Kronos said.

"Uncalled for?! You admitted to starting a war! No wonder your friend abandoned you! You're a monst-"

Before Starlight could finish her sentence, she felt a tight grip around her neck. She could then see that Kronos' horn was glowing a sickly yellow that matched his eyes.

"Want to know something funny? You still think you're the good guy in all of this. You, ...a mentally unstable mare, wanting revenge on cutie marks for petty reasons. You're nothing." Kronos forcefully pulled the terrified Starlight towards him. "Here's a little secret, Starlight. Your plan to break up Twilight and her friends? It's going to help me in the long run. Care to see the results?"

Kronos charged up his horn and enveloped Starlight in a white magical sphere that grew bigger and bigger. And then the magic dissipated, with Kronos and Starlight no longer being on board the Entropy, but instead in a barren wasteland. The sky was a dark beige and the only things left were mounds and dried up tree branches.

"Where are we?!" Starlight demanded.

"The future!" Kronos said, never losing that courteous tone in his voice "Or rather, the present."

"But there's nothing here!"

"I know. I had all sorts of nefarious evil-doers wreak havoc across the land. I provoked the Realm Ravagers, and in turn, they unleashed all sorts of destructive horrors onto it. The resulting bloodshed was enough to empower me to the highest level a unicorn could get to."

"I don't believe you!" Starlight shouted.

"Well, you better believe it. You may dread it, run from it even, but destiny arrives all the same." Kronos then leaned in closer towards Starlight. "Or should I say I arrive all the same?"

Kronos' eyes flashed for a brief moment, with Starlight's eyes flashing the same yellow at the exact same time before she fell unconscious. Kronos then lowered his head and stared at the unconscious Starlight. Kronos started humming, then singing a little tune.

Sleep little Starlight, rest your pretty head,
For when you wake from your rest, everypony will be dead

Kronos teleported him and Starlight into Twilight's Castle of Friendship.

They exiled me, like a reject
Left me with little defense
When I ponder on the subject
I feel a little tense
But I think of something lovely
To feel less dejected
Because it soothes my inner foal-y
And that's something I have not objected

Kronos lit up his horn to implant thoughts into Starlight's mind, including a time-travel scroll made by Star-Swirl the Bearded.

The sound of Twilight's dying breath
Her friends screaming at her death
Her subject's mournful cries
What lovely lullabies

He then erased Starlight's memories of encountering him.

Now I tried letting it pass
And I thought I could move on
But I have my own plans
So now it's bucking on

He teleported to his ship, with the room he teleported in being occupied by sectoids.

So I found myself some allies
Who will make everypony pee
For they are so scary
And yet they serve me

Kronos lit up his horn once more to cast terrifying illusions for theatrical purposes.

A song of angry growls and howls
As we move on with our prowls
Then there will be so much carnage, oh my
What lovely lullabies

He then moved towards the Bewitching Bell, which was placed in a plastic case.

Most bad guys are gone, yet I'm still around
To tear everypony limb from limb
And when I am done with doing that
The sight will be grim

He then moved towards the Seal of War and the Seal of Business, who were sleeping quite well.

Rest, my precious seals
Think what tomorrow will bring
For once we have captured your brethren
I will live like a king

The sacrifices for the Seal of War
The incredible amount of gore
And as for Business profiteering
The cheers I am hearing
‘Kronos, what a guy’
My vengeance is nearing
And then my flag will fly
As all my enemies die
What lovely lullabies

Author's Note

Like to see Starlight get tortured some more? Stick around for the incoming chapters.

Honestly, I'm surprised I didn't write a scene of Kronos taking a crap on Starlight's head like a Scottish hero would do to a Welsh twat (that's a reference to the BBC show Staged BTW).

Which is ironic considering I myself fit the description of "Welsh twat."

Speaking of references, guess what song Kronos' villain song was based on:

Chapter 23 - Let The Operation Begin

In the present, Kronos was still trying to remember where he had seen Starlight before. And then it clicked.

"Oh yes, I remember! You're that pathetic cult leader, aren't you? Starlight Glimmer, correct?"

"How do you know who I am?" Starlight asked.

"You don't remember me? Oh, wait, of course, you wouldn't remember. I erased our first encounter from your mind. Allow me to refresh your memory." Kronos' eyes flashed, as did Starlight's. And then Starlight pressed her hooves against her head and screamed as memories were being painfully flooded into her head. Memories of ponies being mutilated. Memories of the end of the world. And then she looked at Kronos.

"What if I told that your time-travel hijinks weren't your idea?" Kronos said, his courteous tone never ceasing to be dissonant from his horrific actions.

"How?!"

"As I said, I will arrive soon enough."

"Twilight and her friends will-"

"Stop me?” Kronos interrupted. “Oh, I love these heroic speeches! While I won't deny they get tiresome after a while and I already know my responses to most of them, I find it cute that even though I am winning, you think you still have a glimmer of hope at beating me." Kronos gave a light chuckle at his own stupid joke before turning away and trotting towards a corridor. "I'd love to stay and chat but I got about four more seals to find. You will be expecting a visitor soon that will turn you into one of those Cyber-Pponies you saw all those years ago, or rather you hence saw in the years coming. Toodles!"

Twilight and Laeyoon were still clashing swords. While Laeyoon had taken many blows from the purple alicorn, he wasn't going to give up. He knew that if he lost this fight, not even the Emperor himself would let him live it down. Most of his allies had already been defeated and the guards just stood there watching the show. Just when he thought he got the upper hand, he felt a tug that pulled him away from Twilight and into the wall. He looked to his side and saw Luna using her magic.

"Oh no, not again," Laeyoon said.

Luna threw Laeyoon into the pile of his unconscious allies like they were bowling pins.

"Well then," Luna stated. "I suggest we get a move on."

Before Twilight could follow Luna, she turned around and counted how many ponies there were, she noticed that not only Doctor Whooves and Derpy have not returned yet, but Starlight went missing as well.

"Uh...Luna?" Twilight asked. "Do you know where Whooves and his companion disappeared to?"

Twilight turned around and saw Luna was about to slash her with Laeyoon's weapon. She telekinetically grabbed Jaesa's lightsaber to block the attack and pushed Luna back with her magic. Luna closed her eyes and laughed. As she did so, her laugh sounded more demonic.

"I guess that was impulsive of me, wasn't it?" Luna said, her voice having a sinister reverb to it.

Luna's eyes opened up and they were glowing green.

"Hello, Princess," Luna, or rather whoever the entity possessing her body was, said. "It's been a while. Oh, and congratulations on the promotion."

As Starlight waited in her cell, exhausted after several unsuccessful attempts at busting the door down, the cell doors quickly opened. But before she could have the chance to escape, she was grabbed by her legs by four mechanical appendages that were a mix between tentacles and pincers. A pony connected to the appendages entered the cell with an operating table on wheels. The pony wore a pair of red goggles and a lab coat as white as the pony himself. The pony was also bald but had some sort of triangular pattern on his head that somewhat resembled circuitry.

"Do not struggle and this will be quick and painless," the pony said monotonously.

The pony used the mechanical appendages to pin Starlight down onto the operating table. Restraints spontaneously sprung up on the table, imprisoning Starlight's limbs. Starlight struggled in vain to break free only to be pushed down by one of the appendages.

"What did I just tell you?" the pony asked in the same monotone as before.

The pony trotted towards Starlight's head and lifted it up with one of his mechanical appendages. He used one of the other appendages to pull a mouth guard out on one of his coat pockets and placed in Starlight's mouth, using his other free appendages to force it open.

"Rather than give you the same procedure most cyber-ponies go through," the pony explained, "He ordered me to give you something a bit more special."

The pony trotted behind Starlight and pulled a device from another one of his coat pockets. The device looked like a drill mixed with a corkscrew. The pony forced Starlight's head down as he slowly placed the device near the back of her neck. He turned the device on and slowly injected it into her neck. The mouth guard muffled Starlight's screams of agony as the device dug deeper into her neck. It felt like somepony made a hole exposing her brainstem and put out a cigar in that hole. Her whole body eventually felt like it was dipped into the fiery lakes of Tartarus itself. She struggled and screamed but it was no use, her body was paralyzed at this point. She thought this pain would last forever, but the whirring of the device stopped as the pony slowly removed it from her neck. The pony let go of Starlight's head as it pounded onto the table.

"That was phase one of the operation," the pony said. "I will wait for you to heal before commencing the next phase."

The pony trotted out of the cell as Starlight despondently stared at the doorway. Even though the pony had finished operating on her for the time being, the burning feeling within her didn't leave with the pony. Never had she felt that much pain in her entire life. If that was just the first part of the procedure, she dreaded to imagine what the rest of the procedure would feel like and what it would do to her.

Author's Note

And that should be the end of the Starlight Torture Porn arc. Now we can finally get on with the story. :rainbowlaugh:

Chapter 24 - What The Hell?

Twilight stared at the possessed Luna, shocked that the foe within her, Lord Sanies, had suddenly returned after the last time she and her friends faced him.

"How is this possible? My friends and I defeated you with the Elements of Harmony and freed Luna from your possession!" Twilight said.

"You know, I had a similar conversation with Starlight and Luna within the dream realm," Sanies replied. "I suppose when one learns enough possession magic to hop from body to body at will, one does essentially become an undead cockroach. I'm honestly surprised Sombra and Sacanas didn't practise the technique back when they were still alive."

The Sanies-possessed Luna lunged at Twilight with his laser sword, to which Twilight swiftly blocked. After a few more swings of the blade, which were parried by Twilight, Sanies noticed something. Twilight wasn't fighting back.

"What's the matter, princess? Afraid to hurt one of your friends?" he asked mockingly. "Unfortunately for you, I have no quarrel hurting those close to me. Keep enemies closer, as they say."

Before Sanies could attack Twilight once more, they both heard a strange sound. A police box materialized behind Twilight, and out from it came Doctor Whooves and Derpy, followed by a red unicorn who looked like he had never heard of personal hygiene. Twilight and Luna stared in confusion at the contraption Whooves, Derpy, and their new ally used to travel here.

"Sorry we were gone for so long," Whooves said, "It's just that Muffin decided to acquaint herself with this rather strange contraption we found in the hangar." Whooves then looked at the possessed Luna. "Oh, and now would be a good time to mention that Luna has an evil dragon in her head."

Twilight and Sanies looked at each other before looking back at Whooves.

"Yeah, I did kinda figure that one out on my own," Twilight said bluntly.

"Ah, yes. Sorry I didn't arrive sooner. But on the bright side, Muffin and I found somepony that is interested in helping us." Whooves pointed to the red unicorn.

"Hello there," the unicorn spoke. "My name is Lion Dude. I am a felon who was convicted on charges of piracy, possession of Class-B drugs and using a mind-control spell on Fleur-Dis-Lee. You can trust me."

Twilight glared at Lion Dude, not even bothering to believe that Lion Dude was trustworthy. "I find that difficult to-"

"Okay, I believe you," the Cutie Mark Crusaders and Twilight's friends said in unison.

Twilight looked at her friends in surprise before looking back at Lion.

"Then again, we have teamed up with worse," Twilight deadpanned.

"I know," Lion replied. "I have seen you and your friends having a good laugh with Discord despite him throwing Equestria into chaos once or twice. Plus, I do believe you had a tiff with Starlight Glimmer back when she was running that town and yet, next thing you know, she teams up with Discord to save you guys as well as Equestria from the changelings. I guess friendship really is magic."

"Oh please," Sanies said with venom in his voice, "If that were the case, why would she and her friends use the Elements of Harmony or whatever magic they pull out of their rumps to turn people like me into stone at best or flat-out obliterate us at worst?"

"Maybe it's because people like you, Chrysalis, and Tirek are bloody psychopaths?" Lion suggested.

Sanies shrugged Luna's shoulders. "Fair enough. Now then, if you excuse me and the princess, we were in the middle of a fight."

"Cool. You do that while me and Whooves buck off with everypony else," Lion said.

"And what makes you think I would allow you and your princess' friends to escape?"

"Because there would be a good chance that Kronos would be very unhappy if you spontaneously killed everypony," Lion said.

"Not necessarily," Sanies said. "He only needs them alive because he believes that if these so-called 'heroes' find the Seals before him, he could easily sneak up on them and take the Seals for himself. Then I have his permission to kill them. But considering the amount of ponies brought on this venture, who's to say that I can't at least kill the little fillies before they find anything?"

The Cutie Mark Crusaders hid behind Rainbow Dash, Applejack, and Rarity in fear for their lives as Sanies gave them a sinister grin.

"Congratulations, you officially gone into Disney villain territory," Lion deadpanned before trotting beside Twilight.

"Uh...what are you doing?" Twilight asked Lion.

"Trust me, princess. I know what I'm doing."

"If so, then could you tell me what it is you’re doing?"

"You'll find out when you see it," Lion said, "But as a forewarning, I am tone-deaf and I have the dancing skills of a paraplegic."

Lion stood up on his hindlegs and clumsily tried to move his hip side-to-side while humming a tune. As everypony stared at Lion in confusion, he placed his forelegs forward, right foreleg first then the left one, while still moving his hip and humming the tune. Whooves snapped out his bewilderment when he realized what was happening.

"My little ponies?" Whooves whispered to Twilight's friends and the Cutie Mark Crusaders. "Now would be a good time to get inside this contraption."

Everypony, knowing Twilight has got this, reluctantly complied and tiptoed towards the police box. As they did so, Lion crossed his forelegs and placed his forehooves on his shoulders, still swinging his hip and humming the tune. Sanies was too distracted by what Lion was doing to notice the police box loudly disappearing out of existence.

Laeyoon woke up from his defeat, his head hurting like hell after once again getting his arse kicked by Luna. As he struggled to open his eyes, he saw out of the corner of his eye what appeared to be a very hairy unicorn dancing in a way that, in any other circumstance, would be enticing. But since that the unicorn appeared to be a male, and s well as the fact that his dancing was very stilted, like a protocol droid at a rave, it created an image that Laeyoon really didn't need in his head right now. His mouth, agape with bewilderment, spoke the one question that had been on everyone's mind right now.

"What the hell?"

Author's Note

Heeeey, Macarena!

Chapter 25 - Geronimo!

Everypony stared in awe at how big the police-box looking spaceship was on the inside. It was also shiny and chrome, with a bit of white here and there.

"Oh, if only there was a way to make a form-fitting dress that is as roomy as this spectacle," Rarity said.

"So, we're on a spaceship far from home and you’re already thinkin' of making a dress?" Applejack asked.

"Well, you got to have inspiration from somewhere, darling," Rarity replied. "After all, a dress that's not as tight as it looks would be worth a fortune."

"And how do you plan on making a dress as roomy as this ship we're on, if y'all could even call that?"

"I'm sure we might find something on our travels,” Rairty said. “Or maybe Twilight and the Doctor could work on reverse-engineering it,” Rarity turned her head towards Whooves. “Right darling?"

"Well," Whooves said with a shrug, "I wouldn't say the technology on this contraption could be reverse-engineered for dress-making but it would be fun to find out the components of this ship so that we could present it to the masses as a way for non-unicorns to travel through time and space."

Whooves then trotted towards a picture of what appeared to be an entire galaxy. The picture had little doodles on it drawn with what appeared to be a red marker.

"Even though we are in a time machine, I'm afraid we have no time to waste," Whooves explained. "This star-map has all the possible locations to where the Seals of the Planets could be. Since Kronos now has the Seal of Venus, as well as the Seal of War and the Seal of Business, though those last two joined Kronos willingly, we have to find the Seal of Weather, the Seal of Wealth, and the Seal of the Sky before Kronos does."

Whooves pointed towards a planet that looked like a dusty ball of clouds.

"Through my brief collaboration with Lion before we arrived to rescue you, we theorized that the Seal of the Sky could be found on this planet named Bespin. Mainly because it has a city in the clouds that was rather unimaginatively called Cloud City."

Rainbow Dash glared at Whooves, who Whooves immediately realized he accidentally insulted Cloudsdale, which was also a city in the clouds that had "cloud" in its name.

"Oh, uh, no offence, Miss Dash," He said hastily before pointing towards another planet. This one looked like a cloudy ball of water.

"This one over here is Kamino, the Planet of Storms. While it is known for its impressive cloning technology, the weather there is atrocious and therefore the perfect hiding spot for the Seal of Weather." Whooves then pointed to another celestial object that was smaller than the planets Whooves previously pointed out. It looked like a golden orb with small light patterns that almost looked like circuitry. "And last, but not least, the Smuggler's Moon, Nar Shaddaa. With a name like that, there is a fair bit of scum and villainy. And what do most criminals want? Why money, of course! So chances are that the Seal of Wealth is hiding within one of the many casinos there."

"Actually, you're wrong about that one," a voice called out from nowhere.

Whooves turned his head, trying to figure out where that voice came from. And when he least expected it, a portal formed just above the floor with a familiar draconequus popping his head through.

"I have the Seal of Wealth with me in my cousin's casino,” Discord said. “Just thought I should tell you that so you guys don't waste time on boring casino filler and because I don't want my dear Fluttershy to be endangered for no reason at all."

Fluttershy blushed at that last statement. She wondered if, when this adventure was over, she should propose to Discord. While she could wait for Discord to propose to her, provided he actually was in love with her and saw her as more than a friend, she knew that wasn't Discord's style.

"I see," Whooves stated, "And since you're here, I'm going to assume you know how this contraption works. I am merely a novice at using this thing so maybe you might have a clue about where we can locate Bespin."

Discord stretched out an arm to type in coordinates into the control panel and then pressed a lever.

"Enjoy your travels!" Discord said jovially, "And keep Fluttershy safe!"

Twilight and Sanies stared at Lion Dude, who was exhausted after performing a distracting manoeuvre.

"Right then," Lion said while panting heavily. "Do you need...anything else from me...Princess Twilight?"

"Um...well," Twilight said, "There is the small possibility that Starlight was captured while everypony else was fighting these guys."

Twilight pointed towards Laeyoon Oude, who was on top of a pile of his unconscious comrades. Laeyoon had his head up as he watched Twilight, Lion and Sanies. And when he noticed Twilight looking at him, he immediately pretended to be still unconscious.

"I'm still unconscious," Laeyoon said unconvincingly. "Please don't bother me."

Twilight faced Lion, who was still panting heavily.

"Cool," Lion said, "I go rescue 'discount you' while you continue kicking possessed Luna's arse. Ciao!"

Lion trotted away to where he presumed Kronos would keep prisoners. Twilight turned towards Sanies, who was wearing the most deadpan expression a possessed alicorn could have.

"I'm just going to walk away and pretend this didn't happen," Sanies said bluntly.

Sanies trotted in the opposite direction of where Lion was headed, stepping on Laeyoon's groin along the way. Laeyoon shot up and groaned in agony before collapsing back down and pretending to be unconscious again. Twilight, now on her own except for the unconscious foes next to her and one pretending to be unconscious Sith lord, shrugged her shoulders and went in the direction she presumed Lion went.

Cowardly Donkey stood outside of the cell Starlight Glimmer was in. He was put in charge of guarding the cell and making sure Starlight didn't escape. He whistled a tune to himself to pass the time. At the corner of his eye was a red unicorn with a messy mane and tail and a great big bushy beard. The unicorn cracked his neck and looked at Cowardly Donkey.

"Sup, Bray?" the unicorn said to Cowardly Donkey.

"How did you know my na-"

But before Cowardly Donkey could finish his sentence, the red unicorn tackled him to the ground.

Author's Note

Planet of Storms, eh? I wonder who would like that (even though he is reformed in this continuity).

Chapter 26 - Unstable Unicorns

As Starlight awaited the next round of torture to be delivered to her, her cell door opened. But rather than the same pony that drilled into her brainstem, it was instead a shaggy unicorn that, for some inexplicable reason, smelled like curry.

"Hello there," the unicorn spoke. "My name is Lion Dude. I am a felon who was convicted on charges of piracy, possession of Class-B drugs, using a mind-control spell on the hottest supermodel this side of Sassy Saddles and, oh yeah, I'm here to rescue you. You can trust me."

Starlight stared at the grinning unicorn before her. Since she desperately wanted to escape and saw no other options, she decided to trust Lion Dude, provided he isn't secretly in league with Kronos.

"Well, I once enslaved an entire village and nearly destroyed all of time so okay, I'll believe you," Starlight said dryly.

"Perfect," Lion said ecstatically. "Now then, let's get you out of these restraints."

Lion tried to use his magic to free Starlight. Unfortunately for him, he realized that the cell he was in was magic-proof.

"Damn! He doesn't settle for using magic-restraining rings and handcuffs, does he?"

"Actually, he did the first time he imprisoned us?"

"He did? Either he quickly learns from his mistakes or he was counting on you and your friends to escape."

"Why would he do that?" Starlight asked.

"I dunno. Good guys have a better success rate than bad guys. Chances are he fully expects you and your friends to find the Seals of the Planets. But that's just my guess. I dunno, he seems smarter than the average evildoer."

“Now that you mention it, he did tell me he was counting on Twilight and her friends to find the Seals for him.”

“Telling the hero his evil plan. Classic villain flaw. Well, unless he already succeeded thirty minutes beforehand.” Lion trotted towards the restrained Starlight and cracked the bones in his forelegs. "Right then, looks like we're doing this the hard way."

Kronos sat at his grand command chair in his equally grand control room, petting the Seal of Business.

"And where do you reckon your brother is?" Kronos asked the seal.

"Probably at a casino somewhere,” the seal replied. “Because of his ability to instantly make money, he has a massive gambling addiction."

"You're jealous of him, aren't you?"

"Why? Because he can instantly make money while I work my tail off for mine? No, we're as cool as a pair of cucumbers."

"I'd say sarcasm is unbecoming of you."

"Says the manipulative unicorn that pretends to be nice and yet would have no problem killing me as soon as me and my brethren outlive their usefulness."

"It's true, I would."

One of Kronos' accomplices, a pony wearing a lab coat, a pair of red goggles, and four mechanical appendages, entered the control room.

"Kronos, I have completed phase one of the operation. Would you like me to continue to phase two once the subject has recovered?"

"No, phase one will suffice, Pharma," Kronos said.

"You remembered my name for once. It's a miracle."

Kronos glared daggers at Pharma. "Pharma, I can erase you from history if I wanted to."

"You make sardonic comments all the time, Kronos."

"That's different. I'm usually more powerful than everypony else and, let's be honest, it's part of my charm."

"Okay, I believe you."

As Kronos continued stroking the Seal of Business, a concerning thought occurred to him. "Pharma, who did you leave guarding the test subject?"

Kronos and Pharma stared at the unconscious form of Cowardly Donkey, whose jaw was wide-open and he was covered in bruises from head to hoof. The cell door was open and there was not a trace of Starlight Glimmer in sight.

"Cowardly Donkey?!" Kronos shouted. "You left Cowardly Donkey here?!"

"One, his name is actually Bray. Two, since Starlight was placed in a magic-proof cell and I used magic-proof restraints for good measure, I assumed he could have handled it."

"Cowardly Donkey couldn't handle a barrel of amaretto, much less discount Twilight!" Kronos stormed off, tasking himself with finding the escaped prisoner. "Must I do everything myself?! The ponies and other individuals under my employ are bloody useless!"

Lion and Starlight trotted down an empty corridor, hoping that they didn't encounter any of Kronos' guards. Since Lion was a fervent admirer of Twilight Sparkle, but mostly not to the point that he wishes to subjugate that beautiful mind of hers, he decided to break the silence between himself and Starlight and asked her a few questions.

"You are now one of Twilight's students, correct?" he asked.

"Actually, I’m the guidance counsellor in her School of Friendship but I guess you could say that," Starlight replied.

"Are you close friends with her perchance?."

"I wouldn't say I'm as close to her as she is with Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Rarity, Applejack, and Fluttershy but she trusts me enough to have a hypnotherapy session with me. Unfortunately, I accidentally implanted a compulsion in her that causes her to torture a poor ladybug kite whenever she sees a ladybug."

"Yeah, I'm not an insect person myself. I don't even like butterflies," Lion said.

"Then you probably wouldn't like Fluttershy."

Starlight giggled at her witty remark while Lion just glared at her unamused, something she immediately picked up on and quickly went quiet.

"It's not that I don't like the patterns on their wings," Lion explained, "It's more they are creepy up-close. Seriously, why do insects have to look so wrong?"

"If you like, maybe we can have a hypnotherapy session together."

"No thanks! I'd rather be the one fiddling with other people's minds than have it done to me! I know it's a double-standard but I have serious trust issues and the worst I did with Fleur-Dis-Lee was check her body out in a mirror and maybe...uh...ahem."

Lion whistled as he made inappropriate gestures with his hooves, much to Starlight's disgust.

"In my defence," Lion said in a possibly foolish attempt at justifying himself, "I bet she would have liked it were she conscious while I was controlling her."

"Where did you learn a spell to control her anyway?"

"Where did you learn your brainwashing magic?"

An explosion interrupted Starlight and Lion's conversation and stopped them in their tracks. As the smoke cleared, there was what appeared to be a pony in a red jumpsuit wielding a katana and wearing sunglasses over his mask. And in the most ridiculous accent possible, the pony spoke only two words.

"I'm back."

Author's Note

Well, me and my editor were three days late. Damn this heat-wave!

Also, if I catch anyone shipping Lion Dude and Starlight Glimmer, I would be very unhappy.

Chapter 27 - Dead Poop's Back (Again)

Lion and Starlight stared at the costumed pony before them. Lion could have sworn he had seen this pony before. And then the realization hit him.

"Dead Poop?" he asked.

"Lion Dude?" Dead Poop asked in response. Once sure it was him, the mercenary ran towards Lion and gave him a great big hug, much to Lion's discomfort.

"Oh my sweet Celestia!," Dead Poop said excitedly, "I haven't seen you since-"

"Get off!" Lion struggled to get out from his grip.

"Oh, sorry man. I forgot you're not a hugger."

Dead Poop jumped off of Lion Dude. "So how you doing, man?"

"I'm good, thanks," Lion replied.

"Still got that crush on Fleur-Dis-Lee?"

"I wouldn't say a crush but yeah, I still fancy her."

"Awesome! Flower fuckers for life!"

"Oi, watch the language! We're trying to go for a 12, not a 15!" Lion shouted.

"Huh?"

"Or as the yanks call them, a PG-13 and an R."

Starlight just stared at the two red ponies in befuddlement. For all she knew, they might as well have been speaking different languages. Dead Poop turned towards Starlight, startling her in the process.

"Oh, I've been hired by this guy Kronos to kill her and her friends. But especially her teacher and her friends."

"What a funny coincidence, I rescued discount Twilight on Princess Twilight's orders."

Starlight frowned at Lion.

"Are you really taking orders from Twilight?" Dead Poop asked.

“Which one? Discount Twilight or Princess Twilight?” Lion asked in return.

“The princess, duh!”

"What can I say? I heard she's a socially awkward nerd like me! Plus, she's pretty!"

"And you're delusional!" Dead Poop said.

"Maybe I am, maybe I'm not. Only one way to find out and that's by getting close to her, then wandering around her castle when she's not around, then look through any diaries, notes and checklists she has, and observe her interactions with her friends in order to 100% assess if she's good waifu material."

Lion squeaked and grinned like an idiot. Both Dead Poop and Starlight stared at him in a mixture of confusion and bemusement.

"You have daddy issues, don't you?" Dead Poop asked.

"Yes, but that's not the point."

"Well, I'd love to stay and chat but I'm afraid my boss just showed up."

Lion and Starlight turned around to notice that Kronos was standing right behind them.

"Oh, I'm sorry, was I interrupting you killing them by talking them to death?" Kronos deadpanned.

"Hey, I was gonna kill them!" Dead Poop argued defensively. "It's just that I happen to know this guy!"

Dead Poop pointed at Lion Dude, to which Kronos raised an eyebrow.

"Who are you supposed to be?" Kronos asked.

"Hello there," Lion replied. "My name is Lion Dude. I am a felon who was convicted on charges of piracy, possession of Class-B drugs, and controlling a pony Dead Poop and I fancy in equal measure. You can trust me."

"Okay, I believe you."

"Good. So any chance we could borrow one of your ships?"

Lion Dude and Starlight were tied to a rocket that was being prepared to be fired into a dustbowl of a planet.

"Perhaps, I should have been more specific," Lion said.

"You think?!" Starlight said in an annoyed tone.

Kronos trotted towards the control panel getting prepared that will be used to launch the rocket.

"Just a heads-up," Kronos said, "If you survive and you see an undead cybernetically-enhanced alicorn-batpony hybrid, tell him I said hello. Or better yet, kill him."

Kronos pressed the big red button to start the rocket's engines. The rocket fired off into the vacuum of space. After a short while, the rocket entered the planet’s atmosphere, and began to burn up on reentry. Lion and Starlight thought that it was starting to get a bit stuffy on the walls of the space vehicle. Soon, the surface of the planet kissed the shuttle, and it landed with a spectacular explosion. The rocket’s debris flew for miles across the surface of the planet. Lion and Starlight trotted out of the explosion, untied and miraculously unscathed.

"Thank goodness for plot armour," Lion said.

"What?" Starlight shouted as a ringing sound in her ears blocked out what Lion said.

"I said 'Thank goodness for plot armour'!"

"What?"

"Never mind!"

"What?"

Lion trotted onward and waited for Starlight's hearing to return. He pondered to himself if he was secretly a Mary Sue (or Marty Stu, as the case may be) and he didn't even realize it until now since he got to meet a pony he idolized and he survived an explosion with his hearing intact while his current companion is, hopefully, temporarily deaf. And that's not even factoring in that, in spite of serving time in an interdimensional prison, he is relatively angstless. Everypony else is struggling to save the universe from total destruction while he just tagged along because the plot demanded it, the opportunity arose, and he was bored out of his gourd. But then he remembered that if he were a Mary Sue, he wouldn't be struggling with a dark side of his own. Also, another potential reason for tagging along was because he owes Whooves and Muffin for helping him take down Décortiquer. Well, if one of Muffin's friends teleporting a giant bread monster to eat Décortiquer counts as helping him.

Starlight, still unable to hear anything but a high-pitched ringing, stood where she was and observed her surroundings. She felt a strange sense of deja vu, like she had been to this place before. The sky was a dreary dark beige, and the only things she could see from the distance were mounds and dried up tree branches. She grasped her head in agony as she remembered Kronos, and to a lesser extent, Twilight, showing her this exact same place. A future with no elements to protect it. Noticing Lion had trotted off without her, Starlight hastily caught up to him.

"Wait for me!" she shouted.

"Oops, I thought you were following me," Lion said. "Didn't know the explosion affected your sight as well as your hearing."

Starlight glared at Lion, to which Lion gave a sheepish grin.

"And your hearing is back. Yay. Let's pretend I didn't insult you so we could work better as a team."

Starlight trotted on.

"You are one weird pony, you know that, right?" she asked Lion.

"True but everypony's weird to an extent."

Lion and Starlight continued trotting forward. None of them had any idea where they were going, or if anypony else was even here. As they continued, Starlight noticed a dark pony in the distance. The pony wore some sort of tribal mask and had an unnatural pair of yellow eyes.

"Uh...Lion?"

"Yeah?"

Starlight pointed towards the dark pony, to who Lion then looked towards.

"You know, I'm almost tempted to find out if this guy is evil or not," Lion said, "Mainly because a dark pony wearing a skull mask with a pair of yellow eyes doesn't really scream 'good guy'."

"I honestly thought there would be nopony here."

"What do you mean?"

"Um..."

"Never mind, we'll exposite later. Instead, let's focus on the..."

When Lion looked at where the pony was, they had mysteriously vanished. He and Starlight turned around and noticed the pony had appeared again, this time right in front of them. The masked pony swiftly punched the two of them in the face and knocked them out with little to no effort.

Author's Note

Guess who's back. Back again.

CAPTAIN DEEEAD POOOOP!

Nah, just Dead Poop.

Well, that ruined the thing.

Say, can I be in Invasion of the Livid Bread? I know there's a guy in T(NS)CCG that likes Deadpool. Maybe I could be a stand in for him.

:ajbemused:

No.

Chapter 29 - Everyone Died. The End.

Kronos scoured across the Entropy, trying to find the escaped Starlight Glimmer. As he did so, he encountered Sanies, who was still in possession of Luna's body.

"Ah, Kronos," Sanies said, his voice mixed in with Luna's "I have good news and bad news."

Kronos rubbed his forehead in annoyance, "What's the bad news?"

"Doctor Whooves and his companions have escaped," Sanies replied.

"Oh," Kronos said before shrugging, "Well, that's not bad news at all."

Sanies tilted Luna's head, "It isn't?"

"No, because chances are they will be looking for the seals," Kronos replied, "And when they do find one, me and my forces can ambush them and take the seal for ourselves."

"Interesting," Sanies stated, "And that brings us to the good news."

"Which is?" Kronos asked.

"I have been looking through the memories of this vessel and I might know of a place where you could find the Seal of Wealth," Sanies replied.

Kronos smirked at what he just heard, "Ooh, do tell."

Suddenly, a portal appeared right next to them. And from the portal emerged a dragon that looked eerily identical to the draconic form Sanies once had but with one noticeable difference. He was wearing a gauntlet made of gold that had a bunch of seal flippers glued to them.

"That won't be necessary," the other Sanies said to his counterpart.

"Uh...who are you?" Kronos asked.

"I believe he's from the future," Sanies dryly replied.

"You are correct, my past self," the other Sanies said as he laid his gauntlet to the hooves his past self was in possession of, "I've come back here to give you a gift."

"A gauntlet?" Sanies asked.

"Not just any gauntlet," the future Sanies replied, "But one that contains the power of the Seals of the Planets. It took a lot of backstabbing and I had it fashioned out of this big mechanical warlord that called himself Megatron."

Sanies gave a wry chuckle, "Megatron? And I thought I had an ego. Anyway, I appreciate the gesture but there is one small problem."

"What's that?" the future Sanies asked.

Sanies raised Luna's hoof up in the air, "I don't have any hands at the moment."

"Not to worry," the future Sanies said as he put his gauntlet back on, "You can use mine."

And without a moment's hesitation, Sanies left Luna's body and transferred his essence into his future self. And after a moment, he breathed a sigh of relief.

"Feels good to be back," Sanies as he raised the claw that had the gauntlet on, "And now it's time to do something I've been meaning to do ever since I heard of these Seals of Power."

With a snap of his claw, Sanies, Kronos, and the entire ship they were on turned to dust.

Meanwhile, in Princess Eris' casino, Discord, Captain Goodking, and Sacanas sat around one of the craps tables having a laugh about their past misdeeds.

"No matter how hard I tried to show her how unkind her friends have been and that she should be the same," Discord said "She refused to stop being kind herself and was so accepting of her flaws. And then I was like 'Oh, for goodness sake! You've been kind for too long, time to be cruel!'."

The three ex-villains let out a shared hearty laugh at Discord's anecdote.

"I heard this story before but sweet Celestia, it never gets old," Sacanas said "You know, it's amazing how quick she was to forgive you considering you messed around with her head."

"If you think that was bad, you should have seen what Starlight Glimmer did to her and her friends," Discord said while letting out another joyful chuckle.

"Hey, I got a fun idea!" Sacanas said "Let's see which one of us has the worst deeds on our rapsheet. The winner gets a million bits from the Seal of Wealth to spend on the slot machines."

"Oh, that's going to be a doozy," Discord said while stroking his beard. "After all, I turned Equestria into a world of chaos, Goodking enslaved most of Equestria and turned the princesses into stone, and you lead an alien invasion."

Discord leaned in close towards Sacanas, his eyes glowing red and a nasty scowl written on his face.

"I haven't forgiven you for kidnapping Fluttershy, by the way," Discord growled.

"Meh, I wouldn't blame you," Sacanas said with a shrug "Since that you're the oldest of us bunch, you go first."

"Sure thing," Discord said jovially "After I got bored being a part of King Vorak's royal court, in which I used to act as a jester, I travelled to Equestria to have a bit of fun. Problem was my idea of fun was different from everypony else's at the time, so I got turned into stone for my troubles. Centuries later, I got freed from my stony imprisonment and played a game with my friends, though they were my enemies at the time, that involved going through this maze and, if they reach the centre of the maze without being corrupted by moi, they win and I don't turn Equestria chaotic like I did the last time. As you can guess, they lost. Then suddenly, they shook off their corruption and used the elements to imprison me again. Luckily for me, because of the Cerberus incident where a bunch of inmates from Tartarus, including Vorak's son, Lord Tirek, had escaped, Celestia tasked Fluttershy and her friends with convincing me to change my ways. As you can see, I did change my ways but only for Fluttershy's sake. I knew that Celestia and everypony else was using me so when I encountered Tirek, he convinced me to abandon my friends and have a bit of fun. It was only after he betrayed me that I realized what I had done and what I lost. And that's when I decided to use my powers for good and help others turn over a new leaf."

"Let's see," Sacanas said while holding out a hoof "You turned Equestria into a chaotic Tartarus-hole twice, corrupted your future friends and then sold them out to Tirek after you apparently mended your ways. That's pretty evil, my friend. Okay, my turn."

Sacanas inhaled deeply.

"I made two magical artefacts, one that can take away magic and the other that can grant its user the power of an alicorn. I trained an ambitious and very bad dragon on how to use magic that I specialized in, which was mind-control, petrification, and magic absorption, then I helped Kronos find the Seals of the Planets by orchestrating an alien invasion to act as a distraction for Celestia, her pupil and her friends, and I had my draconic apprentice trap Captain Goodking and the Nightmare Knights in a dream world."

"That's it?" Goodking asked.

"Well, I also turned the Pony of Shadows into my own personal attack dog," Sacanas said "Anyway, your turn."

"Well, I used to be called The Storm King. Actually, I went through several different rebrands before that one but I forgot what the other ones were. I have conquered a lot of lands before setting my sights on Equestria, enslaved a lot of cute little ponies, started a storm that nearly destroyed Equestria, came back to life and went through another rebrand, with was The Magic King, stole everypony's magic and helping Sacanas' bad dragon buddy in destroying the world. Then I got turned into a chicken for some reason and then turned back to normal to beat up someone stealing my shtick. And that's when I became Captain Goodking."

As Goodking finished his story, Discord and Sacanas just stared at him.

"Wow, and I thought I used to be evil," Sacanas said "What do you think, Discord?"

"I think we have a winner," Discord replied.

"Sweet!" Goodking said, "Well, maybe not that sweet but as long as I'm trying to be the shepherd despite once being the tyranny of evil men, I'm good to go."

As Goodking jumped off of his seat to walk over to the Seal of Wealth to collect his winnings, Sacanas looked towards Discord.

"Discord?" Sacanas asked.

"Yeah?" Discord replied.

Sacanas raised one of his hooves, which slowly turned to dust, "I don't feel so good."

Discord looked at his own claw and realized that had turned to dust as well. Suddenly, the rest of both Discord and Sacanas turned to dust and blew away.

"Guys, do you know where the Seal of Wealth is?" Goodking asked.

Goodking returned to his seat to find Sacanas and Discord had disappeared.

"Guys?" Goodking asked.

Suddenly, Goodking felt a stabbing pain in his legs. As he looked down, he noticed they and the rest of his body were slowly turning to dust.

"Oh, boy."

Author's Note

Holy Moley, it's been more than a year since I last updated this fic? Well, I better finish it considering it's my longest fic so far (beating Old Mare Luna out by four chapters).

You ever play a tabletop RPG and the campaign just goes totally off the rails, whether it be to bad luck, incompetence on the players' part, and/or everyone just felt like being a dick to the GM?

Well, this ending is kind of like that except it's the GM that derailed the campaign due to the lack of fucks given by other players (with only one or two being invested in it) when compared to his other campaigns and just decides to get a petrol can, pour some petrol on the game board, light a match, and watch the fucker burn before moving on with his life. :pinkiecrazy:

Chapter 11 - Wounds Of Future Past

It was a time of peace and prosperity for Equestrian society. Princess Twilight Sparkle had ruled Equestria for five millennia and society had been revolutionized as a result of her teachings in friendship and her own scientific know-how. Really, the last time there had been any conflict was in the first century of Twilight's rule when a mad stallion named Nihil ordered a group of like-minded ponies called the Realm Ravagers to lay waste to the land in his own twisted sense of order. The only reason he was stopped was because he wanted revenge on Discord and, after finding out about his redemption, as well as seeing him mourning for Fluttershy since she passed away from old age, he called off his forces and signed a peace treaty with Twilight.

Living in Canterlot were two foals, a grey unicorn and a brown Earth pony, who were the best of friends. They bonded over their fascination with time and their desire to leave Equestria to explore the stars. Soon enough, the unicorn got old enough to attend the School for Gifted Unicorns, believing himself to be incredibly gifted and feeling that this is the only way he and his friend could truly find out the secrets to time-travel. While the entrance exam was the same as always, which was to hatch a baby dragon egg, the unicorn felt that was too easy and decided to practice a spell by using the Earth pony as a test subject. The unicorn was going to try and send his Earth pony friend into the future. He focused so hard, he thought he was going to burst a blood vessel. Then, his friend started swirling with arcane energy and suddenly disappeared in a magical explosion.

The Earth pony was sent hurtling through the time stream, mesmerised by all the colours and the images of past, present and future. That soon ended when he landed on his back in a barren wasteland. But it was not barren at all, for there were ponies battling one another. There was blood everywhere and one pony wearing a skull-like mask grabbed another pony by the head and smashed his head open in front of the terrified foal. And if that wasn't bad enough, he also bore witness to all sorts of monsters and abominations prowling across the ruined land with spindly legs and slithering tentacles. Along with the ponies wearing skull masks, there were hordes of travesties, Lava Demons, the Pony of Shadows, Clockworkers, and some sort of primordial chaos that would make Discord himself scared. If anypony has ever wondered what the pits of Tartarus looked like, this was probably as close as they were going to get. The Earth pony tried to run but everywhere he turned, there was something trying to kill him or somepony dying in his way. When he thought all hope was lost, he noticed a portal with a familiar grey hoof sticking out.

"Whooves!" a voice called out. He would have recognized that voice anywhere. It was the voice of his best friend.

Whooves immediately began to run as close to the portal as possible, trying desperately to avoid all the sharp objects and pony corpses along the way. He dashed through the portal and, when he got back to his time, he quickly and tightly embraced his unicorn friend and wept. From then on, Whooves decided that there was no way anypony had to go through what he had gone through and experience what he had witnessed. Time eventually past and the young colts eventually became stallions. In spite of what he had witnessed, Whooves actually managed to put the past behind him and grew up well-adjusted. And not only that, but he had his best friend helping him out with his studies regarding the science behind magic, maybe even finding a way for other races such as pegasi and Earth ponies to use magic the same way unicorns and alicorns could. But of course, such research could take centuries, even millennia, until they got results from it, so they have been experimenting with ways to slow down their ageing.

While Whooves had more success thanks in part to using techniques practised in cryogenic preservation to slow down his ageing and metabolism, his friend used magic and genetic splicing, which had the side effect of turning his eyes into that of a serpent. Oh well, at least it increased his ability to hypnotize people and he could even regenerate lost limbs. Though it would take further genetic splicing to be able to do that one. Time eventually passed and Whooves and his friend finally figured out how to make it possible for non-unicorn ponies to use magic, even if it's only the ability to manipulate time. And not only that, but they also found out a way to scan for ponies with a particular affinity for time-travel magic. After all, if it was possible for a pegasus to break the sound barrier and perform a Sonic Rainboom, then it is possible for some pegasi to fly so fast, they could even fly through time. And the same concept could easily apply to Earth ponies but with running instead of flying. But of course, such things are mostly basic and are limited to travelling into the future so they continued studying and experimenting for ways for Earth ponies and pegasi to use even more complex time-travel magic.

And that's when Whooves discovered, thanks to decades of self-experimentation, that he could now manipulate his own metabolism and even his own perception of time. He tried this theory out by throwing three balls in the air in an attempt to juggle them. By imagining them going slower than they actually are, he can actually catch one of them with one hoof and throw it into his other hoof with the ball floating in slow-motion. Of course, such process also made him very hungry. Now that he could slow down time, he wanted to find out he can speed it up. So he spent one day on a caffeine binge and running around his house until what was supposed to last twenty-four hours instead passed by in ten seconds (according to the count in his head anyway). But of course, why stop with going forward when you can go backwards too. While going back in time proved more difficult, he managed to do not by running, but by standing still and remembering the ten-second day and playing it in slow motion in his head until he pauses on a specific moment and goes from there. Excited by this discovery, he just had to tell his friend the good news. And so he came barging in while his friend was giving a lecture about time spells.

"Kronos!" Doctor said excitedly, speeding in like a bullet-train with electrical sparks zapping out of him. "IhaveexcellentnewsIhavefiguredoutawayfornonunicornstousemoreadvancedtimemagicthatinvolveschangingtheirperceptionoftimeandmanipulatingtheirmetabolis-"

Before he could finish his extraordinarily fast sentence, he suddenly disappeared out of thin air in a big zap. Kronos ran to make sure his friend was okay and found him collapsed onto the front porch of his house. When Whooves opened his eyes, he noticed Kronos was looking over him with a smile. In spite of the snake eyes, it was a warm smile, one you'd actually expect from a friend. Soon enough, they made their way to Twilight's castle to present their findings to her. Since Twilight herself had her fair share of time-travel escapades, she figured the best way to make sure nopony messed up the timeline was to have a group of ponies in charge of keeping an eye on time. But of course, such peace was never meant to last since the Realm Ravagers have returned and waged war on the Time-Turners. Both Kronos and Whooves did their bit in the war, with Whooves acting as a medic and Kronos being a general. But Whooves recognized where he had seen these horrors of war before, especially when he had a glimpse of a foal version of himself while healing one of the soldiers. After this revelation, he had a full-on panic attack and ran for his life. He bolted open the doors of Kronos' office, which was a bronze colour with a big portrait of Kronos on the right wall and a massive cuckoo clock on the left wall, and looked through Kronos' drawers for any time-spells. Unfortunately for him, that's when Kronos walked in with a golden seal in hoof.

"Doctor, might I ask what you're doing looking through my drawers?"

"Nothing. Just looking for a time-spell that might be beneficial to the war."

Whooves then looked at the seal Kronos was holding. It was golden and it was wearing a war helmet.

"Quite an unusual creature, Kronos," Whooves said in order to distract Kronos from the fact that he was trying to steal a time-spell written by Star-Swirl the Bearded, "What exactly is it, might I ask?"

"Oh, this? Oh, it's not much, just the Seal of War."

"Oh come along now! That is such a tasteless name to give the poor thing, even if it does look sort of adorable with that helmet."

"I wasn't the one who named it. It's called that because it's in charge of starting wars. Not only that, but it also feeds of the bloodshed of those wars."

Whooves' blood ran cold at that statement.

"W...What do you mean?"

"Since we're friends, I'm going to tell you a little secret."

Kronos walked closer to Whooves and whispered his plan in Whooves' ear. What Kronos said absolutely horrified Whooves. How can his best friend that he's known since they were foals be so willing to sacrifice so many lives just for the sake of power? And the worst thing was that the war Kronos was responsible for was the same war Whooves bore witness to when he was just a foal.

"You're a monster!" Whooves said, with disgust and horror in equal measure.

"I see no problem with that. After all, most monsters tend to be immortal. Isn't that what we wanted?"

"No! Our goal was to explore space and time! You're trying to destroy it!"

"True, but at least I'll make something better in its place."

And with that, Whooves pushed Kronos out of the way and ran as fast as he can to Twilight's castle to tell her of Kronos' treachery, in exchange for hiding away in the past so nopony could disturb his research and so Kronos didn't come looking for him. After all, if he could put his traumatic experience behind him when he was a foal, he could easily put this time behind him as well.

Author's Note

Well, canonically speaking, Whooves did say a particularly traumatic event happened to him when he was a foal. This is what I imagined that would be.

Did I mention that Kronos is a mix between Rassilon and The Master? (with a little bit of DBZ Abridged Frieza thrown in there).

Chapter 28 - And Now For Something Completely Different

Sunset woke up and struggled to get up off of the floor. Her head ached like she had too much cider to drink. She observed her surroundings, trying to figure out where she was and how she got there. She was on a row of grey tiles, with a few futuristic benches and bushes on each side of the pathway of tiles. She must be in some sort of park or maybe even a garden. She looked to her left and noticed a woman staring at her. The woman had brown hair tied up in a ponytail, blue eyes, and was wearing body armour and holding a gun.

"Oh good, you're avake," the woman said in a German accent, her voice a mix of a male voice and a female voice overlapping. The woman crouched down and held her hand out to Sunset.

"My name is Otto von Fuhrer but you can call me 'Dr Mindnick'. After all, zat's vat my teammates call me."

Sunset looked at Dr Mindnick with a mix of fear and confusion. Begrudgingly, and steadily, she held out her arm and grabbed onto Dr Mindnick's hand. Dr Mindnick quickly helpt Sunset up.

"Oh, one thing I forgot to mention," Dr Mindnick said "Zis isn't my original body. I couldn't afford gender reassignment surgery so I practised some magic zat can make me possess people. But don't worry, Milly's cool vith me using her as a timeshare. Ain't zat right?"

Dr Mindnick closed her eyes. When she opened her up, she looked around in confusion. Perhaps it wasn't Mindnick in control this time but instead his host.

"Dr Mindnick?" Sunset asked.

The woman looked towards Sunset.

"Oh, you must be a new friend of Otto's," the woman said before holding out her hand "Emilia Connor, codenamed 'Dragon Lady' because of my fondness for dragons. Weird how you go from searching for real-life dragons one minute and being forced to share a body with a batshit insane occultist the next. Good thing Otto's nice, though."

"Well, I once turned into a raging she-demon that enslaved the school so someone becoming friends with their possessor doesn't sound that far-fetched," Sunset deadpanned.

"Oh, I heard of that incident!" Emilia said excitedly, "They really ought to shut that school down."

"I'm very certain that a few magical misadventures happened outside of school grounds," Sunset said.

Emilia's eyes rolled into the back of her head and then rolled down.

"Did somebody say magic? Mein ears are burning!" Dr Mindnick said excitedly "Vell, zey're not my ears but you get ze idea."

"Mindnick!" a British voice called out in the distance "Get your arse over 'ere! And bring the citizen with you!"

"Coming, Mein Fuhrer!"

Mindnick grabbed Sunset by the arm and ran with her near a vending machine that the British man was apparently hiding behind. They hid behind the vending machine with a man with long dark brown hair and a beard to match. Like Mindnick/Emilia, the man was also wearing body armour. Sunset assumed this was the British man speaking to Mindnick.

"My name is Merlin Andrews," the man said "Codename: The Brit. Short and unoriginal but bad-arse nonetheless."

Merlin then pointed to a group of individuals clad in heavy armour. The group were all holding guns and they wore bizarre helmets on their heads.

"Those lot are ADVENT," Merlin explained to Sunset "They're people that have sided with the aliens and willingly enforced their rule over this planet."

"Aliens? As in grey, big-headed aliens?" Sunset asked.

"Well, some of them are," Merlin replied, "The ones you described are called sectoids. While they are the backbone of the alien army, they have powerful psionic abilities that can dominate even the strongest of minds."

"Ja," Mindnick butted in, "Und ze new ones are big, scary, und pink!"

"Yeah, ADVENT had produced a new breed of the bastards that have stronger psionic abilities than the old ones," Merlin said, "So much so that they did away with having commanders for the different groups of them."

Sunset was confused by what Merlin had said, as well as the various events that have transpired when she woke up. How did she get here? What are aliens invaders doing on Earth? Why is there a woman sharing a body with a deranged German mad scientist? She had so many questions but so little time to ask them.

"Right then," Merlin said, "Let's move."

Merlin quickly ran behind a conveniently placed potted plant, with Mindnick dragging Sunset along another conveniently placed potted plant. Merlin pressed a button on his comm to talk to one of his allies.

"Charles, I need you over here to blow these guys up."

As Merlin waited for Charles to show up, the ADVENT soldiers had a conversation amongst themselves. Because of the helmets, no-one could barely understand a word they were saying. Suddenly, a hairy, unkempt man with a grenade launcher appeared out of nowhere and fired grenades at the ADVENT soldiers.

"Grenade!" the man said before laughing maniacally.

The ADVENT soldiers flew up into the air as the grenades exploded before immediately, and very clumsily, landing on their necks and breaking them, instantly killing them.

"Good job, Charles!" Merlin said the grenade launching man.

"Who's that guy?" Sunset asked Mindnick.

"Zat is Charles Merasmus. He thinks he's an ancient wizard for some reason. Zen again, zere vas an ancient wizard, also named Merasmus, who vas arrested for snapping Tom Jones' neck."

"What?"

"Somehow, Tom Jones got better. Apparently, after having his neck snapped, he had a dream zat he vas in a shower in heaven und zen a cherub snapped his neck, sending him back down to Earth und bringing him back to life."

While Sunset was no stranger to the more bizarre elements life had to offer, what with being a magical unicorn that jumped through a mirror into another world in the hope of a better life, turning into a fiery she-demon that mind-controlled most of the school, got into a battle of the bands with a trio of ancient sirens, had to talk down an alternate version of Twilight Sparkle from going down the same dark path she once did. And that's not getting into when a camp counsellor turned into a forest spirit, her getting stuck in a time loop, and playing a very frustrating squirrel themed video game with Fluttershy. Thank Celestia, the princess not the principal, that internet viewers enjoy seeing their favourite Let's Players lose their shit over an extremely difficult video game because she still wondered to this day how Fluttershy managed to beat the game despite not being as much of gamer in comparison. In all honesty, Sunset wouldn't be surprised if Fluttershy managed to complete Getting Over It with Bennet Foddey without raging at least once.
.
With all the strange things that happened to her in life, it makes all too much sense that she would be fighting aliens with a British man who thinks of himself as the next Jason Statham or Clive Owen, a German bodysnatcher who is good friends with their host, and a schizophrenic demolitions expert.

Author's Note

Soz this was a week late. It appears my editor is busy fighting alien bread monsters in another universe.

Anyway, now we're finally getting to the XCOM side of things. And referencing events that had happened in the Team Fortress 2 comic as well. It's a pity you're only allowed 3 Series tags, otherwise I would have added Transformers and Team Fortress 2. And if you thought Infinity War was the most ambitious crossover ever, just you wait.