Rarity's Colt

by Majikkstar

Rating: teen
Tags: Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Fluttershy, Sex, Profanity, Slice of Life, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Sweetie Belle, Romance, Drama, Original Character
Length: 101019

Rarity, among others across the land, signed up to be foster parents for foals after numerous disasters struck the nation. Few expected to be called upon, among the least was Rarity.

A troubled colt with poor boundaries, bad language, and what seems to be a very troubled past is sent to reside with Rarity, a mare unprepared for true motherhood as well as being unknowing of how to raise a foal of a different gender. A long road ahead awaits them both.

Rated Teen for adult language and strong sexual references and situations. No sex occurs in this book.

As appropriate, this is a societal gender reversal role story; so expect some differences than what you may be expecting as far as gender authority is balanced.

This story is inspired by many other stories, most of which are incomplete and stopped years ago; never to be updated again(?).

Also, this story takes place before Alicorn Twilight.

Published 2019-09-12 14:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-12-12 06:52:53 UTC

(Supplemental Chapter) Initial EMFFMH Evaluation: Snickers

Equestrian Ministry of Families, Foals, and Mental Health

Intake Report/Initial Assessment

Patient Demographic Information

Client: Snickers, reported by client
Age: Client reports ~400 years, physically appears 6

Race: Pony, Earth

Gender: M

Weight: 77#

Patient Lineage Information

No parents or guardians known at present time.

Brief Physical Description and History

Client is a chocolate brown Earth Pony with a silver-white mane and lime green eyes. No obvious signs of physical distress or abnormality noted by counselor.
Client was made known to the ministry by Doctor Hoofset of Onthersville General Hospital. Apparently, Snickers was found on the edge of Dark Winds Woods by a camping troop of Filly Scouts. He was taken in for potential physical trauma from various falls, scratches, bug bites, and malnutrition to a moderate degree.

Client was in an intoxicated state due to consumption of berries in the wild. Client presented a 'rough' appearance and a lack of coordination was noted even after intoxication was well out of client’s system.

Family History

No family history has been given by foal at the time of this report. Current searches are being conducted in rural areas; major cities report no lost foals matching his appearance. Client self-reports good relationship with family of non-pony types. Client states that last contact was years ago, possibly making him an orphan vagabond. Rare, but not unheard of.

Psychological History

No known psychological history. Client self-reports 'problems', but refuses to elaborate. Counselor observes a lack of proper self/other boundaries while in a curious and/or hyper state, switching to extreme distaste of contact otherwise. Client is fearful and aggressive, triggers seem to be questions about his past, physical examination, psychological examination. Client shows common signs of sexual trauma/abuse, abandonment issues, and intoxicant exposure. Possible exposure may include ketamine, refined meth-salts, alcohol, tobacco, deil, and earth mist. Advice caution and a watchful eye.
Client reports a different societal normal standard he believes in regards to clothing being a requirement, consistent with body fear and self-loathing tendencies. Client reports psychosexual norms consistent with abuse and (pseudo)rape as 'normal' in his life as caused by a conflict between natural exposure versus covering himself with anything to, in his own words, ‘hide his shame’. Referencing his, and others’, reproductive organs.

Social History

Client has an active imagination; self-reports as the alien creature human. Client states social and cultural norms far outside of Equestrian social norms and was seen displaying aggression when contested by another foal, no injuries were sustained as client was walking poorly at the time. Client is possibly a Diamond Dog escapee, due to dislike of physical contact and subsequent aggressiveness for one his age and gender. Client disregards redirection, correction, and we refuse to use punishments at our facility.
Of note is the depth his mythological society has, differing itself from common archetypal fantasy; the notable utopian ideal world we live in versus a world that uses technology and sciences outside of current known bounds.

Equestria Ministry of Families, Foals and Mental Health

Client Contact Notes

Snickers is an Earth Pony colt of average size for his age and is slightly under-weight, very likely due to his lifestyle of travel and self sufficiency. First contact made while Snickers was intoxicated, when he awoke he had a violent tantrum for being denied alcohol and tobacco products, and was sedated. While under the effects of sedation, Snickers deep-kissed this Counselor and made overtly-sexual motions toward hospital staff regardless of gender or species.
Over two days of close observation, he was deemed too affectionate toward female ponies and this Counselor noted behaviors consistent with sexual trauma/sexualization. He was seen exploring under mares’ tails and was nearly struck when he tugged a filly’s tail up to view her labia. He engaged in a major tantrum when restrained and after striking several bystanders with thrown objects, he was sedated again.

After sedation wore off, Snickers hid from sight until bribed out with water and promise to have time alone in his room. During the time he was ‘alone’, scrying spells are always active, he was seen masturbating several times, not yet achieving climax which adds to the belief he is under 7 years of age. He attempted autofelacio with successful results, thus he must be guarded and taught to perform sexual acts as he did in private and not in public, as well as to refrain from engaging in mounting habits with others as it tends to lead to sexual objecfication and addiction until hormones balance during late adolecence (age 8 in cases involving colts).

Snickers shows aversion to contact, lack of eye contact, lack of trust, lack of proper behavior and self restraint for his age group, as well as control issues, confusion of boundaries, confusion of self, delusion and fantasy preference... Snickers has tried to act like a mare three times and self-reports he was one for several years until after a surgery was performed to make him male again. That is obviously untrue. I request a full Psychosocial and Behavioral Assessment be completed as soon as possible.

He also reports a liking of tobacco and shows poor impulse control in regards to obtaining items of value to himself, i.e. he has kleptomaniac tendencies beyond the terrible three’s wherein a three month old will take objects and claim them as their own.

He is strong willed and hard to redirect. Snickers also has extremely foul language when angered, annoyed, or frustrated and attempts to redirect by hospital staff were insufficient.

Snickers is deluded to a high degree. He reports believing himself a 400 year old hermaphrodite that changes between genders. He claims no memory of how his 'transformation' occurs. He also claims he is married to a female dragon named Shenron, with the explanation that it was what his master commanded.

He has a job in the Kingdom of Sofas which, from what this Counselor could gather, is essentially scribe or clerk type work. It is not lost on this Counselor that it is a play on the inappropriate wording of ‘so ‘bucking’ dumb’, where bucking is the softened version of the inappropriate wording.

He has a good knowledge of basic economics, though the currency he reports is several other types instead of bits.

His delusional world is an extensively created science fiction fantasy world of high technology, low magic, very warlike, and it appears to be an inverse of gender roles. He claims to being omnivorous, or as he calls himself, ‘eaters of the highest degree’. Snickers did not relay information regarding militaristic behavior consistent with an aggressive hunter species such as gryphons or territorial minotaurs.

He refuses to elaborate on anything of his past, often attempting to redirect conversation to other topics such as clothing, sexual topics, and complaints about the quality of food. To be honest, most staff would agree with him on that last comment.

Counselor Notes

This is beyond anything I have ever seen or heard of. The only possible explanation I can come up with that makes any logical sense, is that this colt has been sexually abused and traumatized to a degree that I can barely comprehend. Diamond Dog enslavement is the most likely cause, but I cannot rule out family abuse, especially with the sexualization aspects of his personality. On two occasions he tried to seduce me, he kissed me once, his curiosity with mare’s reproductive areas, and the lewd discussions he tried to start during his first day were troubling indicators.

He is going to need a loving family that is disciplined yet caring, and supportive enough to help him break out of this fantastical world of talking hairless higher apes and learn to join real pony society. He is smart, creative, and on occasion funny. We need to nurture those aspects while diminishing the angry, destructive, negative, abusive, and sexual nature he currently shows.

Introductions

Rarity took several minutes to regain her composure and clean the mascara that had run from her tears, but like she always did, she recovered and stood tall. A mare, ready to face what was ahead was she, and she was determined to do her duty to the colt she was to take in. “Excuse me, but I have to powder my muzzle. Where shall we meet so I may introduce myself to the young gentlecolt I’ll be caring for?”

Seven opened the door with his wing. “I’ll bring him to your home in one hour, if there’s anything you need to take care of before we arrive, I suggest you do it fast. The greeting process can take up to an hour; I have to be present while you show him his new home, lay your house rules before him, and officially accept him.

“It’s all formality, but it helps the foals we work with feel accepted into the environment. He may seem like he’ll be trouble,” Seven said as he followed Ivory and Rarity, “but all foals want to be loved, and once he lets his walls down you’ll see a new colt before your eyes.”

“Hmph, I suppose we will both have to learn from one another in this case. I’m not a true mother, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be; in the same right, he is a foal that refuses to be. There’s only so much we differ, it seems,” Rarity said sagely.

Several seconds passed in contemplative silence before it was broken at the base of the stairs. “It seems you are the mare for the job, and as I won’t be needed for this part, I wish you both a fantastic day,” Ivory waved the two off as she turned the corner to perform other mayoral duties.

Rarity split from Seven and made her way back to her home as quickly as she could. Saying short greetings to local ponies she knew, some were offput that she wouldn’t stop her haste to have a casual or short conversation; but she didn’t care. She had to prepare and only had an hour to do it.

She reached the door sooner than she thought she ever had and was inside as quickly as she could be, making her way up the stairs to the guest bedroom and making sure it was decent. She took several minutes to use the bathroom to its fullest, leaving refreshed, smelling of various flowers, and having reapplied her makeup as a professional would.

She took some time to prepare a pot of hot water, set out tea and hot chocolate incase he wanted either, and finally made sandwiches with small bite size vegetables on a serving tray in the way her sister liked. She had a two minute panic attack at the thought of her sister having to stay over while a confused colt was living with her now.

That led to the thoughts of what children tend to do with one another at their age, which led to thoughts of pregnancy, horrible cutie marks, a young life spiraling into darkness and sadness… She slapped herself across the muzzle with a dish towel, which helped her mind reset. While she was showering again, cursing the dirty and wet dish towel she’d grabbed in her moment of parental panic, she took time to ruminate on her own life and how her sister is not only well educated in manners of equine reproduction, but has two friends and a sister that she’s rarely without; all willing to help her stay pure until she’s ready in both body and mind for such activities.

With ten minutes left, Rarity gawped at the clock and tried to deny the repeating chance of that number today. She checked the cleanliness of the kitchen, the orderly state of her shop and main areas, she ushered a prospective client out on the basis of a family emergency and a discount if he returned the following morning.

She turned the open sign to closed, and began to pace for the last three minutes. Her carpet was, like nearly all quality carpets, enchanted to hush or eliminate the sounds hooves make. It was deathly quiet around her, save for the clock that was ticking every second like a hammer and chisel, writing her fate in stone. She spent her time inner monologuing as the clock set the pace for her thoughts.

Tick. Tick.
Here resides Rarity.

Tick. Tick.
She says she’s ready for anything.

Tick. Tick.
Can she handle what is in store for her with this poor colt? Is she ready, though?

Tick. Tick.
IS SHE?!

Heavy knocks against the door startled her, her legs lost their rhythm, and she fell to the floor in a heap. She stood as the knocking came again and made it one pace, then stumbled with a squeak. “Darn it,” she cursed to herself and her sore ankle. She quickly hobbled to the door, stopping a respectable distance away, then opened it with her magic.

Seven was standing with the shadow of a colt being cast from beside the door. “Hello, Miss Rarity. Snickers and I are here,” he gestured for the colt to show himself, “and we’re pleased to meet you, aren’t we?”

A young voice scoffed. “Whatever, it’s a place with a roof. Step up from last month,” the youth said as she walked around the corner, trying to prance like he was the new big stallion in town hall.

“Hm, yes,” Seven followed Snickers in and thanked Rarity silently, “last month you didn’t have a roof, so even a tent would be an improvement over that, right, Champ?”

Snickers glowered as his mane was tussled. Rarity frowned at Seven. “If you wouldn’t mind, Seven, would you not muss his mane into such a ragged style?” She moved to her new ward and balanced her weight carefully onto her aching leg, extending her good forehoof to him. “It’s an honor to meet you, young sir.”

Snickers looked at her hoof and bumped it. “So, are we gonna do it or what?” Rarity fell back onto her flank, Seven inhaled sharply, and Snickers stopped breathing while blushing brightly. “I-I didn’t mean it like that! Honest, that wasn’t what I meant! I would never, well… maybe, but not before a couple drinks at least, right?” He stumbled over his words, ending awkwardly with a pained smile.

Rarity went from shock, disgust, a small bit of intrigue that was quashed by everything right in society, and finally ended by giving him a flat stare. “Indeed. Anyway, I have water and snacks prepared in the kitchen, if you wouldn’t mind,” she gestured for Seven to take the lead and pointed them in the direction.

With what was just said, having a colt behind her that has full view of what most mares keep covered felt like a bad idea. It also meant she’d need a change in fashion as exposing oneself was considered edgy and showing one as being a risk taker, now she couldn’t deny and defy others. She had to set an example for a colt that lived with her now, but what else would she have to change to accommodate him?

“Wow, clean place ya got here,” the colt said pulling her out of her thoughts. Rarity walked past the two and encouraged them to sit while she poured hot water into three cups. She placed leaves in hers for tea and both colts asked for hot chocolate.

“So, Snickers, I would like to know something about you, if you don’t mind.”

“Actually, I do.”

There was a moment of silence as Snickers sipped his drink and the others looked at him in growing awkwardness. Seven began the conversation again. “Ah, well, Snickers here is most recently from-”

Snickers glanced aside at Seven. “Shut up and drink your stuff.”

“Excuse me, young colt! You manners--”

“Rock and roll, all night long?” he snarked.

Rarity’s horn lit and his hot chocolate was pulled from between his hooves with an indignant grunt as he reached for it. “There’ll be no sweets if you don’t the same.”

“Is that why you act like you ate a bag of dicks?” He snapped back, his ears folding down after he said it.

She froze, her mouth open. Seven did a spit take Rarity found most unfunny as she was the recipient of the spray and spittle. Snickers broke into laughter and Rarityslowly parsed what to say or do in this reprehensible situation. The taste of overtly sweet and fatty chocolate wafted over her tongue.

She realized suddenly why she tasted something other than tea, horror crossed her expression, then within three seconds her head was in the sink with the faucet in her mouth running at full speed. Whimpering and blubbering unintelligible words until water dribbled from her nostrils, Rarity sneezed loudly spraying the wall behind the sink with snotty water. Standing with poise, she brushed her wet mane from her eyes with her forehoof.

“Yes, on that note... I believe it’s time I lay down some of house rules. One, no innuendos of any kind, type, or manner at any time. Two, you will show respect to all ponies around you regardless of age, gender, or personal beliefs. Three, you will respect boundaries in my home. Both personal and professional, as this is where I work and live. Do you have any questions?”

She called two towels to herself and patted her coat until she was dry. A brush and comb appeared from the next room and ran through her mane while she listened to the colt.

Snickers looked at her, then to his drink floating in her magic. “Is this one of those deals where you lay down the rules and change them when something happens you didn’t expect? Because if it is, I’ll just add on number four; anything that happens can have a rule added at any time.”

Seven looked at the colt beside him with a raised eyebrow and Rarity smirked, then nodded. “Indeed, number four may be the most important of all. Now, let’s have a tour of the living areas and then the areas you shan’t bother by any means. As you’ll notice, I’m being specific so that you have fewer options to circumvent.

“Now, I do understand that no rule is absolute and without loopholes, so we’ll just adapt as events happen. I do hope the best from our future relationship.” Rarity left the room with the colts behind her, she looked back and Seven was following while Snickers was blushing and focusing on her hind hooves.

What could be bothering him? She wondered. “Eyes up, darling. The first room is actually the main room where I display my couture, take measurements, host fittings, and discuss the finer details with my clients. Behind those curtains are changing rooms as well as changing blinds scattered around for less timid or,” she chuckled, “more risque outfits some ponies request or prefer.”

She cleared her throat, pointing to an alcove in the back. “That area is where I work my fashionable magic. I keep my sewing machine and fabric there, and you can’t see it, but to the right is where it expands and I have a much larger work area, but between us I show the customers that part of the room to make it seem as though I work my magic with what little I have, making it seem even more impressive.

“Now, follow me to the upstairs where I’ll show you your room.” Then I’ll finish the forms, send Seven on his way to help other foals in need. Please, let this be as simple as, if not simpler than, other parents have it.

“Welcome to the second floor, beauty in simplicity.” Rarity led them around the hallway as she gestures and talked about the rooms. “Several rooms, three for guests located along the outer wall taking the same space reachable by going either direction.

“Two rooms belonging to myself and my sister, Sweetie Belle, are side by side. My inspiration room is there and is not for entry under any circumstances without my express permission.” She emphasised as she recalled Sweetie’s first time entering the room and how it just barely worked out.

“The bathroom is over around the way there and is fully furnished and always well stocked. You’ll notice it’s slightly larger than the other rooms, but the space is possibly the most important. I simply ask as to how one can make themselves look their very best without the space to do it in?

“My room is to the right, my sister’s room is just past, and your room, young colt, will be opposite the bathroom in the second guest bedroom, which is as far from my sister’s room as I could reasonably make it. Just so you know, the sound tends to carry at times, so anything said too loudly may be heard from up here.

The rooms are enchanted to dampen sound, but only if the enchantment is activated by touching one of two gems,” she led them to a spare room, “as you can see here. Blue activates the sound wards, which are designed to muffle or cancel sounds based on how loud they are. In the event an emergency occurs they will allow all sound through, so you needn’t worry.

The same goes for playing with friends and rough housing, the floors are sturdy enough for playing around as you young ones tend to do, and even though the whole building may seem fragile, it’s actually as sturdy as town hall.”

Rarity led them downstairs again, gesturing as she walked. “The roof is lined with hydrophobic cloth, the walls are insulated with wool from the healthiest of sheep and intertwined with a fire resistant gem matrix. The supports are inlaid with reinforcing stability enchantments, and there are additional ways the structure is as safe as anything could be, if not moreso.

“So, with that said, Snickers, you may explore the house, save for the rooms I’ve marked with chartreuse ribbons at the top of the doors. If there are no doors, the room is open to entry. You will be held accountable for anything that is damaged or goes missing,” she said flippantly, “so keep that in mind. If the door is closed, please knock; for Celestia’s sake, knock!”

“So, Rares, what now?”

She looked to the colt she could call her own now. “Please, don’t call me that. I am a Lady, you may call me Ma’am, Rarity, or Miss Rarity, but such uncouth nicknames from those I only just met are simply rude.”

Snickers glared at her while Seven was setting his paperwork in the kitchen leaving the two alone. “Yeah, I’m not calling you Mistress of anything. Ya know, I have to ask; what are you a Lady of?”

“Beg your pardon?”

“Yeah, what land do you own? How many servants do you have? Why’re you living in this podunk town when the capitol is right on the mountain over there?” He pointed through a window to Canterlot.

“Well, I never-”

“Get laid, I believe it!”

Rarity gasped in shock. “Young colt!”

“Old nag. See, I can call the obvious, too.”

“Go to your room! I’ll deal with you shortly.”

“You want me to go to your room? Pervert! Help, I need a responsible adult. Stranger danger,” he ran past her and into the kitchen where he lost his footing and slipped, landing hard onto his side. “Seven, you’ve gotta help me, she’s gonna do weird things to my most inner child. I’ll never grow up normal this way, she’s trying to get me into her room. Alone. I can see the lustful thoughts behind her eyes, just look at them! No, Mistress, I’ll be a good boy!” he awkwardly bowed to her to the amusement of noone else.

Ignoring the theatrics, Seven sorted his papers and pulled a pen from his saddlebag. “Miss Rarity, sign here, please.”

Rarity trotted to the elder colt and took the pen in her magic. “You do notice that there’s a colt right there that’s having some sort of manic attack, shouting about me doing deplorable things to him,” she casually said to Seven.”

“Do you intend to do any of the things he’s claiming?” Seven tapped the file containing Snickers’ patient files.

Rarity’s head shook at the shock of being asked that question by Seven. “What, certainly not! I am no monster that would ever prey upon--”

“Then don’t worry about it, he’s done this twice now. The first time was at the hospital, with a stallion nurse that was intent on helping him urinate, you’re the second. I heard your conversation just now and we know he likes to overdramatize certain things. We also wear a charmed pin, like the one I’m wearing that detects lies when I activate it.”

Rarity’s horn light shimmered and she smiled faintly. “Ah, a zirconia tied with woodworm and infused a peridot shard containing a Whisper enchantment. Well crafted, if I do say so myself. I think I’ll make a couple of my own, now that I know the gem needed and have access to an alchemist and an archmage.” Rarity signed the papers and watched as Snickers drank the last of his cool chocolate.

“There we are, I’ll have one last word with you before I leave.” Seven moved with her to the doorway. “Here’s a crystal linked to Foal Services, cast a color change cantrip on it and it’s twin there will do the same and we’ll react accordingly. Red for medical related emergency, blue for magical mishap, green for a found food allergy, white for danger to others, and pink for missing foal.

“If he’s lost more than six hours, turn it pink and we’ll arrive to figure out what to do from there. Any questions?”

“I believe I’ll have many over the next couple days, who can I turn to? Is there a color for that?” she asked and looked into the crystal.

“There are three licenced ponies nearby that can help in a time of need. A Miss Fluttershy works with anxiety and depression, mostly,” Rarity gave him a blank look while he spoke, “a Mrs. Lyra Heartstrings holds group meetings for creatures that aren’t sure of themselves or are unhappy with who they are.”

Rarity blinked and looked from the crystal to Seven. “That’s two, who’s the third?”

“I was getting to that. I haven’t met her, but Miss Rainbow Dash works with foals suffering from loss, abandonment, and social issues. Between us, she’s one of the best therapists outside of a metropolis when it comes to working with foals of his type. If you get a chance, have them meet and supervise as they connect.”

He smiled and after talking with her a little more for a few more minutes, he left her and Snickers alone together.

Well, this has been a day to remember, and it’s barely noon. I say, I should just handle this like a mother should, and so I shall.

There was a loud crash and clatter of porcelain shattering against the kitchen floor she knew too well from Sweetie’s mannerisms. “Sweetie Belle, what are y-OO-wah!”

Rarity slid across the floor, barely keeping her hooves on the wet floor until she’d reached about half way to the sink. That was when the chocolate powder, still forming a gummy paste, stopped her. She looked at the colt grinning cockily at her, then flinched when a cup of hot water splashed across her face and mane. “Did I make you wet just now? Whelp, I’ll be in your room if you need me.”

He stood and climbed across the counter quickly while Rarity grit her teeth and brought towels to dry her head. Snickers snickered and hopped to a well placed chair and then onto the carpeted floor before she could rationally call to him about her clean hooves rule. Rarity looked at the hoofprints he made and smirked smugly.

Now I show how easy parenting really is. I’ll just lay down the rules, scold him, and he’ll fold like origami.

Time Out

Before walking into her main room, Rarity took a moment to wipe her hooves with a towel to prevent tracks, then followed the hoof marks made by the colt upstairs to her room. She clenched her teeth behind closed lips and stormed into her room to see him wearing some scrap fabric she had on the floor, held closed with a series of closed pins she used for dressmaking. He was lying on his belly beside the bed looking through her diary.

“Put that down!”

“It is down,” he said without looking up from the open book on the floor. The book was pulled away from him and she looked at the page, sighing when it was a boring entry he’d only had time to glance through. “I can’t read those Wing Dings you unicorns use. Why can’t you just write like us dirt horses do.”

Rarity’s face twisted as anger built inside her. “How dare you use such language! And about your own tribe, it’s deplorable! Why are you so difficult,” she moved her diary to her vanity while looking at the colt.

“Obviously I wasn’t set to easy mode when I got here.”

If she had the notion for it, she’d have tugged his ear to the bathroom and given him a bar of soap. She recalled her own experiences and didn’t want to have him repeat them unless he kept being vulgar and disrespectful.

She inhaled deeply and exhaled just as quickly, resuming a calm smile. “Snickers, I understand you have some adjusting to do to your life with me. Since you’re comfortable and wearing... something, I’d like to talk with you for a little while. I have work that should be done, but you’re more important than anything anypony else may need of me at the moment.” She lay facing him from a leg’s length away.

“So, my name is Rarity. I was born and raised here in Ponyville. I aspire to be a world renowned fashion designer. I have a younger sister named Sweetie Belle who stays with me on occasion when my parents are unavailable or they need a break from her antics. Also, something I’ll trust you not to share...” she flicked her ears and looked at the door in the seconds of silence between them. “I read cheesy romance novels from time to time.”

She snickered into her hoof coyly while he looked at her; appraising her, judging her for what her game might be.

“Fine, my name here is Snickers. I don’t have any family, friends, or relatives. The ponies at the hospital watched everything I did and it was really weird, they overreacted to everything I did, even some self exploration in my alone time.” Rarity opened her mouth to comment but he dismissed her with a wave.

“I like peanut butter, reading erotic magazines for the articles and ads, and a few drinks with friends is always a good end to a day.” He snorted and stomped a hoof on the floor. “And, like, you guys have nothing fun, nothing to kill the time, and nothing to make life easier… life’s too boring here.”

Rarity nodded in understanding. “Yes, small towns have that way about them. When I get a chance to visit a metropolis like Manehattan or Canterlot, I make it a point to stay in public areas to feel the life of the city around me. Eating outside can be far more rewarding than hiding in a building behind a menu.”

He mouthed ‘That’s not what I meant.’ while rolling his eyes as she continued unabated. “Now, about something you said; may I ask?”

“Sure, I’m an open book with sticky pages.” He winked at her and her eyebrows twitched.

“Rules should and shall be followed; if you insist that you should continue speaking in such an uncouth manner I’ll be forced to use extreme measures to curb your language. However, right now I’m wondering what you believe constitutes overreaction in medical facilities?”

“I looked under a mare’s tail to see her junk since she had a rockin’ boo-tay!” He grinned at what he said until he saw her disapproving expression. “Anyway, there’s a needle in my neck and when I wake up I’m restrained in a room strapped to a bed. It was kinda fuzzy for a while, but that hot nurse totally kissed me while I was out of it. So hot, like a solid 8, for a pony.

“Later I wake up and then two hours of shrinks trying to get me to talk about my life had me wanting to jump out the window and see if I could grow magic wings.”

Rarity hummed outwardly while inside she was designing a fashionable set of pants he could wear, since he was so insistent on covering his stallion parts.

His following comment tore her thoughts to shreds. “And, so you know I’m not looking to dip my quill in some mares ink pot anytime soon, so no need to worry.”

Rarity huffed through her nose, bordering on an angry nicker. “Well, while that is good to know; your innuendo is quite unnecessary! While you’re in this house and under my care overall I want you to share nothing about your opinions on sexual matters at all. That is especially meant in public, around other foals, or around others in matters that may embarrass me or affect my business. Am I clear about that?”

“Ugh, you’re no fun at all,” he groaned and fell over to his side.

“Parenting is not meant to be fun, it is meant for an adult to keep a foal safe and fed while they learn at school and play with their friends. You should prepare yourself to fall into your role as my sister has.”

“Wait, what? You seriously think--”

Rarity got to her hooves and moved to the door. “Follow me, Snickers, and I’ll show you your room. I have hours of work to make up and in three hours your new sister will be here. You can introduce yourself and,” she looked behind herself to see him blushing and looking away again. “What’s wrong, are you feeling unwell?” she turned and touched his forehead with her fetlock.

He flinched back. “It’s not that… I’m kinda seeing a part of you I didn’t expect to see for a while.”

Her brows furrowed. “What are you talking about?”

“W-well... you have a really curly tail and…”

Rarity looked at him, surprised at how embarrassed he was as she realized he was noticing her choice of tail style and what she chose to keep exposed. She repressed a smirk. “Yes, it takes me quite a while to get it in such grand curls, but it’s worth it, wouldn’t you agree?” she turned and waved her tail while she strutted a couple paces.

She noticed him glance up to her tail and he averted his gaze. A final motion of her tail and she covered herself from his view as though it were a natural motion. “Well, in any case; If you want your tail done the same, all you need to do is ask, darling. Come, come, we mustn’t dawdle as there’s a lot to do.

“If you grow bored in your room there are books available in the waiting area downstairs. In the evening, baths are taken after supper and once taken going outside is all but forbidden. I won’t have any more little hoof prints across my carpet, young colt.”

She looked back and he was looking at her when she was talking, showing interest in what she was talking about. He was completely focused on her and what she was saying. Thinking of how cute he was when he blushed she swayed her tail and felt a laugh in her throat when his eyes left hers and darted to her rump, then to the floor as quickly as anypony could blink.

All males are the same. I love the attention, but I shouldn’t tease him. He doesn’t even have a cutie mark yet, what could...

Sweet Celestia, I’m teasinghim! What is wrong with you, Rarity?! He’s not only a young colt, but he’s showing signs of sexual abuse and deviance far outside what is normal for foals twice his age because of his past; and here you are, flashing him like you’re trying to get him to notice you for romantic reasons.

Well, he clearly has noticed you, and it's clearly embarrassing him. It’s not the way he should be looking at a parental figure and it’s no way for me to behave. Gah, how could I forget he has a nudity taboo, that’s why he’s wearing that yard of cloth. Celestia’s left nipple, if I kept going as I was... exacerbating his issues is not going to help him adjust to society any faster than if I throw him in a kitchen alone with Pinkie, frosting, icing, and his illicit sense of humor.

Think before you act, Rarity! Do what’s actually right as a parent, for his sake.

Shaking her thoughts away she came back to the moment and realized she had led him to his room, so she opened the door.

“Well...” she cleared her throat and turned sideways, “here’s your room. It’s basically furnished with a bed, a bookshelf that we can fill with books starting tomorrow, a dresser for the clothes I’ll be making you, and the closet. Go in and read one of the encyclopedias or take a nap if it feels you must. Do you need anything before I leave you to your own devices? Very well then, I have to work on my commissions. If you need me, I’ll be just downstairs working.

“That is... after I clean up the kitchen area,” she clearly hinted.

Snickers was looking around the room. “Heh, you were really wet,” he quipped.

Rarity glared at the colt as he looked under his bed and she resisted the urge to make a retaliatory comment to the new addition to her family. “Yes,” she said forcing politeness, “if you’d be willing, I’d appreciate it if you could help me clean all that mess up.”

His head came out from under the bed and he looked at her, restraining a grin. “Uh, no. You can clean up from getting all wet and dripping on the floor. Kinda nasty to ask a kid to help with that.”

A quiet growl escaped Rarity as her face heated in embarrassment and frustration as she left his room. Her magic gripped the door handle and pulled, closing the door loudly as he started to laugh at her. She moved swiftly down the stairs and into the kitchen to clean up the mess they had made. “I swear, that colt is a test to every bit of self control I have. It’s alright, Rarity. Just learn with him and we’ll both be fine in the long run… and buy lots of bar soap”

Finishing the cleaning, Rarity put the laundry in the hamper and got to work. Time flew by so quickly she didn’t notice the time until Sweetie Belle called to her from the foyer. She set her fabric down, put her design plans in a neat pile, made sure her sewing machine was secure, and placed her glasses down all at the same time.

She made it out in time to give her sister a hug and ushered her into the kitchen before the filly could complain. “Sweetie! It’s so nice to see you, how was school? Fun and exciting, I hope? Care for some hot chocolate after such a long day away?”

“Uh, yeah... why’re you acting weird, Rarity?”

“What? Me? Nervous? Can’t I show my sister affection for little to no reason?”

Sweetie thought on that. “Yeah, but usually you just tell me to go play with my friends.”

“Well, speaking of friends, I have a bit of news that will certainly excite you! You have a new friend to play with.”

“Really?!” Sweetie hopped around Rarity in the kitchen. “Is she my age, does she have a cutie mark?! Does she like carrot sprinkle cupcakes? Will I like her mane? Can she sleep over? Is she going to stop by soon, or is she going to get here on the train-” she gasped, “is it Babs? Did Applejack tell you it’s Babs?”

“No, no, no,” Rarity interjected, smiled, then sighed, “it’s much more complicated than any of that. Can you take a seat, this is going to be a lot to talk about and I don’t know how much time we--”

“Hey Rarity, does this whole thing fit? I mean it’s as long as I am!”

Sweetie looked at the speaker, wondering if it was the new filly given the voice. Her mouth fell open at what she saw. Rarity noticed her sister’s reaction and turned to see Snickers. Her mind raced and the world seemed to slow to a crawl as she saw what he had kicked to the carpeted threshold.

Her horn lit suddenly with barely a thought from her, then with a bright flash the object of her private plebeian personal pleasures she at times used in place of a Prince Consort related to a close friend of hers vanished.

He balked at the spot her long friend once was and nearly leapt in excitement. “Wow, that was awesome! I didn’t know you could teleport stuff, can you get me a sammich?” Snickers grinned at her having gotten the reaction he wanted. Then he noticed the filly at the table, staring at him in shock. “Oh, hey, I guess you’re Sugar Belle?”

“Rarity,” Sweetie said as her sister covered her face with her forelegs and whimpered in embarrassment, “who’s that colt... and is that the ‘Mister Ed’ you yell at sometimes?”

Rarity growled as she turned a darker shade of pink from her withers to her muzzle. “Not another word on the matter, Sweetie Belle!” She snapped while glaring at the colt. Snickers looked at the carpet under his hooves and mouthed Sweetie’s name, committing it to memory.

“But, Rarity, who’s that colt? Is he the new friend you were talking about?”

“Hi, I’m Snickers. I’m honored to meet you and hope to be a good nephew to you.”

“What?! Rarity? You had a foal and didn’t tell me?! When did you have time for that? Do mom and dad know?” Sweetie hesitated between thoughts. “Where do foals come from?” she asked with one ear perked, showing curious interest that Rarity didn’t need right now.

Rarity looked at her sweet innocent sister, then he had to chime in. “I bet her parents wanna know about Mister Ed.”

My sweet innocent sister is going to be corrupted by this colt if I don’t snip this strand before the whole ensemble falls apart!

Sweetie and her nephew shared a giggle and bumped hooves while Rarity frowned and cleared her throat. “That is enough from the both of you! Snickers, what did I tell you about going into my room?”

“You left the door open and I was bored.”

“So you had to go through my personal things?!” She barely restrained herself from screaming at him, but got close.

“Hey, in my defense; I was following your open door policy,” he motioned making a tally mark, “and it was in a frilly box under your bed just begging to be looked at.” He paused and she could see his face twisting as he restained another cocky grin. “Do you give him a bath before snuggles or after?”

Sweetie snorted and started giggling into her hooves. “Why would she give Mr. Ed a bath?”

“Young colt, your behavior is unacceptable!”

“What?! I’m following your rules and I just asked a question. You’re the one freaking out over something a wittle cowt my age is asking about things I don’t know anything about that make you uncomfowtabow?”

Rarity glared at him while he stood and looked at her smugly. “Sweetie Belle?” She asked sharply without taking her eyes off him.

“Yeah, sis?” Sweetie responded with another question on her mind.

Rarity spoke in the most serious voice she could muster. “I need you to go get Fluttershy for me as I have need of her time and skills in a private matter. Don’t rush, I have to take care of something while you’re out.”

Taking the cue, Sweetie trotted past Snickers and gave him a sad, knowing look that he didn’t comprehend. “See ya in a bit.”

Snickers winked at Sweetie and started again. “Hurry up, if I call for help and no one else is around no pony can stop her from trying to ra--” Rarity closed his mouth with her magic to silence him.

“Lock the door when you leave,” Rarity commanded lastly. She watched as Sweetie galloped from the room and when the door opened she released his mouth. Before he could comment again she gripped his ear and dragged him to the downstairs bathroom.

He yelped and tried to resist only to learn his ears were far more sensitive than he thought they were. Nothing he did or said stopped her as she pulled him into the bathroom behind her and she admitted to herself that she felt somewhat giddy for what was about to be done to him.

Limits

Snickers gagged, coughed, hacked, and struggled. Bubbles formed from his nostrils and stung all the way to the back of his throat. Tears slowly dribbled from his eyes. All the while Rarity used her magic to hold his ear tips in the air while alternating between bars of soap. One would be under a slow stream of water while the other brushed along his tongue from front to back.

She removed the soap from his mouth and he spit at her hooves. “Once again, are you going to speak vulgary around others?”

“When you go to sleep, I’m gonna stick Mister Ed so far in your a-” he started and then the struggle resumed, started by his muffled word interrupted by bar soap. At least it was fruit flavored, he thought.

“Honestly, it’s been three mintues! How are you so defiant in the face of such a punishment?!”

She removed the soap bar and he spat soap on her foreleg, less forcefully this time with his eyes closed tightly. “I have to see you, nothing’s much worse than that,” he said in a softer voice.

“Why, you insufferable…” she tugged his right ear getting a yelp from him, once his mouth was open she stuck the freshly wettened bar of soap in his mouth and brushed his tongue again, scraping extra bits on his teeth with her renewed pressure.

“Cease your vulgarity and soap will never again touch your tongue!” She spent several more seconds with her ministrations before he finally mumbled loudly and waved a foreleg. Taking it out again, she listened. “What have you to say?”

He coughed phlegm and his breath reeked of wildberry. “I’m sorry! Alright? Shit,” he looked at her with eyes ready to spill tears and, in a sharp motion, he closed his mouth, using the same foreleg he waved to cover his lips. “I’m sorry, Miss Rarity! Please, no more. I can’t...” he said from behind his hoof. He shook his head as tears finally began to run down his cheeks.

She hummed and squinted her eyes, looking at the expression on his face. Her magic faded and he slumped over, coughing roughly. “Very well then. You now what will happen if you speak of horrid things, such as being forced into sexual acts by ponies, it’s not a joke to use those words so callously and flippantly.

“Now, would you like some water to clean your mouth of that foul taste?”

He nodded and when he looked up he saw she’d already prepared some water for him. He took the drink between his hooves and sipped, but before he could swish his mouth he gagged. Rushing at Rarity, who moved aside just in time, he reached the toilet as his body vacated the soap from his belly.

Now she felt terrible. She thought his attitude to be his personality, a well crafted ego built from years of abuse. Now she looked at a young colt acting age; crying, honestly apologetic, and genuinely miserable.

She’d never gotten the mouth scrubbing he had received, she didn’t know the extent of soap he must have swallowed. She held his mane along his neck with her magic and rubbed his back with her hoof. “I’m so sorry, Snickers. I never meant to make you vomit, but you’ll be okay. This’ll pass and I pray we never have to repeat it.”

Tears smeared her mascara for the second time that day as she comforted the colt until he was done. She carefully cleaned his teeth of soap with water, toothpicks, and cotton balls, then helped him rinse the soap from his mouth a final time.

"There we are, my parents never once helped me clean the taste of soap from my mouth, so you know."

He signed. "Yeah, whatever…"

They sat on the floor of the bathroom, his body trembled from something not related to the soap, but she didn’t know what exactly. “Snickers, I really am sorry for how long that lasted. I don't know if I could have handled your punishment in a different way… also, I don’t expect you to understand, just that someday you’ll accept my apology.”

He snorted and whimpered, looking up at her with the saddest eyes she’d seen in months on any creature. Her heart ached for him and she leaned in to hug him. He stiffened at the contact for a couple of seconds before melting into her hug and letting go of his emotional stress. He cried in her embrace, hugging her back for a few seconds before just letting his forehead balance him on her.

The whole time she felt horrible for what she’d done; even though it was necessary and may show better results than a stern talking to.

Minutes passed before he calmed enough to move back from her. He snorted in good humor when he saw her coat, covered with sudsy snot and tears along her underbelly from her collarbone to her teats. “I’m sorry about what I said...” he admitted quietly while avoiding her eyes, favoring his own hooves, “it’s just been a really sh-” he looked up at her and reworded his thought, “I mean it’s been a really weird week for me.”

She handed him a white plastic cup half full of water. “Would you like to talk about it, really talk about it this time?”

He hesitated then shook his head. “Maybe later, but not now.” He wiped his eyes with his forelegs and looked at is leg, then at her, then back to his leg. “Your eyelashes are on my leg,” he said flatly.

Rarity let a little humor into her voice. “Well, I did buy them from a traveling salesmare.”

He slowly looked at her eyelashless eye, then he snickered. She did the same and then they fell into a giggle fit, ending shortly after when there was a loud knock on the front door. “Ah, that would be Sweetie Belle. She must have found Fluttershy faster than I’d expected. Would you like to walk with me to the door? Miss Fluttershy’s a very nice mare and she’d be very happy to meet you before I have a private talk with her.”

He shook his head. “No, I… I just wanna bath, if that’s okay?”

She hummed in thought and debated with herself on the matter. “Can you go a few more hours without one? I only ask because you can share a bath with Sweetie tonight to save time, and you can also go outside to play as opposed to having to wait possible hours if you change your schedule right now.”

Unsure of how to take the idea of sharing a bath with a female, he put it aside and sighed in defeat. “I’ll be in my room then, I have a lot to think about and maybe I’ll meditate on stuff.”

She smiled, gesturing for him to leave the bathroom first. “That sounds wonderful, I’ll have Sweetie go play with her friends and I’m certain you’ll see the trio of them within two hours. I only ask,” she said as they reached the point in their walk where they’d have to split up, “that you stay inside my boutique or just around the exterior.

“There are a lot of distractions you don’t need on your first day here; one of them is running around town when you don’t know anything about it or those who live within.”

He nodded. “Yeah, I get it. Don’t worry, I really need time alone right now. I swear I won’t run away or hurt myself.”

“I certainly hope not, and if you have such inclinations you may speak with anypony about them,” she said with kindness and hope in her voice and eyes.

They split, him climbing the stairs and her going to the door while checking back at him with worry and concern. Why would he be so specific on what he wouldn’t do? Oh, I hope Fluttershy is available and skilled enough to help him.

She nearly reached the door when it swung open just missing her muzzle by an inch. “Rarity, I’m back with Fluttershy and I had a question!”

“Sweetie Belle, what have I told you about shoving doors open? You nearly took my head off with that little action,” she scolded the filly. “What’s your question, Sweetie?”

“Can I take a bath with Mister Ed tonight? He might make a good bath toy.”

Rarity grimaced and felt Fluttershy looking at her, through her eyes and into her very soul in an action that was nearly the Stare. “Rarity… why are you showing Mister Ed to your little sister?”

Rarity shook her head at Fluttershy and took a step back from the typically timid mare. “I didn’t, honest! It was a joke in poor taste by Snickers, but I fixed the issue and that’s just one of the reasons I wanted to speak with you. Sweetie, you may go play with your other Crusaders,” she said urgently, “now!”

“Ugh, but Rarity! I wanna show Mister Ed to my friends, can’t I take him with me?”

“No!” both mares said loudly and in near perfect synchronization. Sweetie stomped her hind hoof on the floor and stormed away for several steps before turning into a happy trot with her tail swaying and ears perked up as though nothing had happened.

“Fluttershy, please come in. I’m desperately in need of your help.”

Fluttershy looked past Rarity and then walked in cautiously. She lay on one of Rarity’s guest lounges and got comfortable as Rarity did the same across from her. “How can I help you, Rarity? I was surprised to run into your sister while I was going outside town to check on a family of birds that might be traveling though, if the rumors are correct.”

“Yes, while I feel for your concerns about the birds, I have an addition to my household that needs your attention as a therapist.”

Fluttershy’s ears attention were now focused on Rarity. “Oh, my. I wasn’t aware you knew.”

“I didn’t, not until a couple hours ago. I’ve taken a foster foal and he is in need of emotional guidance, here’s his file from the Ministry. Please, read it over and go help him. I haven’t the patience at the moment with the way my day has gone so far.”

Fluttershy took the file between her forelegs but didn’t open it. “Um, there’s a lot more to working with a pony than it seems. It’s a long process that may take years and isn’t ever a quick fix for a problem.”

“I don’t see a problem with that, as long as you can curb his more unsavory actions. As per the Ministry’s guidelines, he’s to be enrolled in the school by week’s end and begin thereafter. He has a vulgar streak since walking into my home longer than my tail and he’s acting out in the worst ways…

“Then, just a few minutes ago he cried into my,” she looked down and sighed at her unkempt coat, “once glorious coat. I’ll need a grooming for this soon.” she patted her chest and smoothed out the parts he nuzzled into.

“It sounds like he’s confused and very stressed, and probably acting out in frustration rather than anger. Can you give me an example of how he’s been?”

“Easily, he threw hot chocolate powder at me and doused me with hot water from the sink, then commented on how wet he’d gotten me.”

Fluttershy covered her mouth with her hoof in surprise. “Oh my, that’s not how a colt should act at all.”

“Of that I’m certain.”

Fluttershy inhaled deeply and smiled. “I was wondering why you smelled like chocolate, though. And now I know why,” she giggled when Rarity smiled. “I’ll read this quickly and let you know how I can help him. If that’s okay with you, that is.”

“Fluttershy, how many times must we tell you?” The folder opened and Rarity figuratively bit her tongue. She read a magazine she’d skimmed several times that month while Fluttershy worked, finishing with a thoughtful hum. “Well?”

Fluttershy closed the folder and pushed it closer to Rarity. “I’ve seen these kinds of reports before, most in my training or during refresher classes. I know to take these with several grains of salt,” she scowled at the file. “While under supervision, everything is scrutinized and exaggerated when written down so the future helpers know what to look for, more than what actually happened.

“Except for the part where he,” she averted her gaze, “pleasured himself over time, and kissed the nurse, there isn’t really anything in this that says he’s really a problem child any more than a foal his age should be.”

“But, Fluttershy, he got me wet with chocolate and spoke in the most vulgar way to me. He went through my things and kicked my lovely Mister Ed across my house and I,” she furrowed her brows, “don’t actually know where I sent it. I hope it didn’t go far, or else I’ll have to really take care of him… Celestia forbid, replace him.”

“Rarity,” Fluttershy said with a little more confidence than Rarity was expecting, “we’re talking about something more important right now. I know he may be acting out, but he’s adapting to his new environment. There’s bound to be some stress on you both while he learns about you and your own rules and limits.”

“That… makes a lot of sense, actually. Would you like to meet him, or…”

“I’d love to meet him,” Fluttershy replied quickly, “if this is a good time for you, that is.”

“Of course, darling. Come, I believe he’s in his room. I just finished giving him the treatment for foul language, but he may still harbor such inclinations. Just, be prepared for language most unbecome a child his age.”

“I understand. Angel bunny has quite foul language when frustrated, so I don’t see how much worse it can be.”

“So he must only speak in foul language, then?” Rarity quipped. Fluttershy blushed and looked away. “Oh my, I do apologize. I hadn’t meant to bring to light such an issue you have to deal with. On a change of topic, the colt seems to wear clothes, but only across his rear half. Currently he’s covered with some scrap cloth. He has a habit of looking intently at a mare’s lady bits, but when I make eye contact he averts his gaze.”

“Oh,” Fluttershy looked behind her and made sure her tail was covering herself, “do you think I’ll be safely covered by my tail, or should I puppy it?”

“Puppy… ah, no, you’ll be fine. If you’re worried just keep facing him and he won’t have the opportunity. In my case, I believe I’ll have to devise something to cover myself until he becomes acclimated to our nudity. It truly is taboo to him, it seems, and my choice of unique style and grandeur is too much for him.

“I’ve thought of turning my curls more tightly or trimming my tail to more of a floof, maybe a short braid… but none match my artistic flair that I’m known for. I’d need to change my mane style as well to match or accent my tail as curls don’t mesh well with a pompom style. Then, I wonder… Fluttershy, do you think a scarf, neckerchief, or perhaps an ascot matching my mane color would work?

“Oh! My eyes, the scarf could match my eyes. Heh, perhaps a collar with a ring to show my lovely adventurous side, rather than my current flirtatious and daring nature to challenge the norm. Ah, here we are, Fluttershy. Just a moment and it’ll be the two of you.”

Rarity looked back to make eye contact with Fluttershy, who was looking at the file held in her wings. “Uh-hum.”

“Fluttershy! Have you heard a word I’ve said?”

“Uh-hum.” Rarity swished her tail near the file and startled her friend into dropping it and scattering its loose pages. “I’m sorry, Rarity, I’m just focusing on Snickers. I’ll listen this time if you want to tell me again.”

“No, that’s fine. I was just talking about reformations to my entire style and wardrobe, possibly the ramifications they’ll have on my clothing lines. Nothing important I’d share at the moment again, but the next time we’re at the spa I expect your input on my concerns.”

“I’m sorry, I’ll help you then. I won’t let you down.”

Rarity knocked on the door and listened. There was a clambering and she took that as a reason to open the door. “Snickers, there’s somepony I’d love for you to-- Gyah! What the Tartarus are you four doing?!”

Misunderstandings

Snickers

I was feeling sad after the whole soap thing. I wasn’t going to do it, but I broke down after the stress of all this crap got to me and I cried into Rarity’s chest like some little kid that scraped his knee. I left her to chill in my room, maybe look at the ceiling and count tiles, but there aren’t any. It’s a flat surface that’s polished to the point I can see my reflection somewhat. A weird thing unless she’s that vain or loved to watch herself and Mister Ed have one on one time.

I’ve always figured her room to have actual mirrors, because she is actually that vain.

I was lying on my bed lost in thought when I heard a scratching at my window. I looked at it, thinking it was some bird or squirrel until a red bow rose into view, bobbing and turning like the head it was on couldn’t decide where to look. A bright candy apple red mane showed up next, then a yellow muzzle. Overall she was cute and wearing a weary expression.

Her hooves pressed on the glass and she leaned as close to the surface as she could, looking in to see me. Once she found me she grinned and leaned back pointing, then she flailed her arms almost falling back while shouting something at the sound resistant glass. She fell toward the window and stopped herself against the pane with her hooves, true worry in her eyes.

I sighed, got up, and eventually opened the window to hear the rush of small town noise fill my room and ears. “Heya! Ah’m Apple Bloom, can I come in?”

“Why’re you at my window?” I asked flatly.

“Because Rarity’s downstairs and won’t like it if we come in unannounced.”

“So climbing to my window is a better option than talking with the adults and letting them know you’re here?”

“Apple Bloom, are you going in or just gonna hang out all day?”

“Ah’m goin, Scootaloo! Keep yer shoes on. “Anyway, can ya step aside fer a second?”

“No, you’re not welcome in my room.”

“Ha, Sweetie said you were funny.” Apple Bloom said as she scrambled in through the window and landed in a somersault with her head on the floor and her rear in the air, exposing herself and I saw pink; my head swam from the blood rushing into it. I averted my eyes and staggered to the side, sitting on my flank to steady myself.

“Are ya feelin’ okay? Ah can get ya a glass of water if ya need it.”

I shook my head, which was a bad choice, denying her offer. “No, it’s fine. I just have a problem seeing your personal parts.”

She looked at me funny, her head cocked to the side and an ear drooped. “What’d’ya mean? My whole body is my personal part. Oh, you mean my bow?” she reached up to adjust it. “It’s okay, you can touch it if you want.”

“The last thing I wanna do it touch it! I’m sorry, I didn’t mean… you know what? Hi, I’m Snickers, nice to meet you.”

Her demeanor changed to one of happiness and she grabbed me by my wrist thing with both her hooves and shook me with too much strength and force. When she was done I had felt like I’d just done extensive stretches and strained my muscles. “Yeah, Ah’m Apple Bloom. Ya know Sweetie Belle, and that there comin’ up now is Scootaloo. We have an introduction ta give ya once we’re all here.”

Scootaloo hopped through the window landing like a cat in stride, not missing a beat between falling and walking. “Hey, I’m Scootaloo. You’re Sweetie’s new brother, huh?”

“Actually I’m her nephew, by technicality. Are you her sisters or cousins?”

Sweetie climbed to the window and hesitated, seemingly unable to climb in. “I wish, they’d be the best actual sisters ever!” She squeaked. “Can you guys help me in?”

“Oh yeah, c’mon Scootaloo!”

“Psh, she bumps her horn once and can’t climb in a window ever again.”

“Scootaloo, that’s not a nice thing to say. You know she’s sensitive about that.”

Sweetie grunted when she was pulled in and fell with her rear on the floor. The others let her forelegs go and she fell, hopping to her hooves with a happy bounce. “That’s because it’s really sensitive. It hurt and gave me a headache for hours, mostly.”

I looked at the bony protrusion. “So, you can feel with your horn? How’s that work, and don’t say magic.”

“Ha, unicorns can’t feel through their horns,” Scootaloo replied for Sweetie, “but the base can be really sensitive.”

“Yeah,” Sweetie lowered her horn and tapped the tip. “I feel that, but only as pressure on my skull. If I bump it too hard my horn’ll break and it’ll take weeks to heal naturally. Not to mention the pain I’d be in for a bunch of reasons.”

“Sweetie, did you tell us once about a mare that broke her horn at the base and--”

“C’mon, gals. Enough talkin’ about that depressin’ stuff. Snickers, the three of us make up the Cutie Mark Crusaders and we’d like ya to join up. You ain’t got yer cutie mark and you’d be the first colt member!”

The trio looked at me intently, hopefully. “Nah, I’m good without one.” I shrugged and got up so I could distance myself from them a bit.

“What?!” they called in amazing harmony. Apple Bloom ran beside me and blocked me. “What’re you talkin’ about? Gettin’ yer cutie mark’s the most important thing there is in a pony’s life!”

I looked at her, then behind me to my flank, then at the fillies looking at me, in my eyes and not on my butt. “Apple Bloom, that’s ridiculous. There’s a ton of important things that’re more important than getting branded.”

“Branded?!” Once again they shouted in unison. Scootaloo ran to my other side. “No one brands colts anymore, you’re not property and Miss Cheerilee said that treating males like property is like slavery and that’s bad.”

“Yeah,” Sweetie squeaked her way into the conversation while running around to stand directly in front of me. “We had to apologize to all the colts in class and then after school we got homework to apologize to every stallion we passed at least once to make up for the Day of One Thousand Sorrows.”

The three fillies pouted and actually looked sad. “We’re sorry, Snickers, for what our ancestors did.”

What is it with these three talking in perfect unison. It’s like one voice almost, in stereo.

“Uh, yeah. Sure… you’re forgiven for whatever you said. Now that that weirdness is over, I was having a good time on my bed and looking at the--”

“On your bed? Cool, let’s jump on it, too!” Scootaloo turned the conversation topic from me as expertly as she turned herself and climbed onto the bed with a little buzz of her wings. It wasn’t that high, I think she just needed the exercise; those were freakishly tiny wings, even for a kid.

“I dunno, jumping on beds is kinda unsafe. Like, what if I fall off and break my neck and you have to push me around in a wheelchair and feed me for the rest of my life?”

I was expecting a poor response to my quip. What I got was a muzzle under my tail that shoved me hard enough to toss me into the air where I was again shoved by what I presume to be a magic blast thing from the little marshmallow. I was in a half dozen states of freaked out. Not only was I falling without any style, I was in shock from getting blasted in my ribs and it stung a lot, but most on my mind was that I just had some girl’s nose pressed between my nuggets before she flung me like a pizza maker tosses pizza.

I landed on the bed and for some god awful reason I didn’t bounce the way physics would indicate and fly off into the wall lips first, leaving red paint where I’d have landed. No, I bounced straight up and was eye level with the purpleish orangey pegasus. Her grin was sickening and I was going to comment on it, but then I fell because science works sometimes.

I landed on my side and bounced again, this time I saw the other two and heard the trio giggling like idiots as they bounced and took me with them. I actually don’t think they knew I was along for the ride against my will, everytime I tried to tell them I’d land and the air would escape me. After about thirty seconds, though, I started to have fun.

I may not have laughed like a madman that just reinvented the ampersand, but I certainly felt that happy sensation I get when I’m feeling good with other people. I made only one mistake the whole time I was along for the ride, and that was to try to take control of my own jumping. I twisted and tried to land on my hooves.

The landing was a perfect ten, the fact I kept my centrifugal force was either an eight or a two, whichever is the bad end of the spectrum. My hooves left the bed and I spun on all three axis taking the fillies legs from under them. We all crashed on the bed and my head landed heavily on Sweetie’s flank jarring me.

“Snickers, there’s somepony I’d love for you to-- Gyah! What the Tartarus are you four doing?!”

I felt the girls jolt and then scramble on the bed as I put a hoof to my head. “What a ride.” I said it as a statement, not a joke. The tug on my ear was not the response I was expecting, neither was being dragged from the bed barely faster than I could get my hooves under me.

“Young colt, I thought we just had a discussion about your manners, and I find you trying to mount my sister and her friends?!”

My eyes went as wide as I thought they could. I first tried to shake my head, which was a very bad idea because my ear. I tried to talk, but once again my ear.

“Rarity! Put, him, down.”

The magic holding my ear abated instantly and I fell in a heap on the floor, my ear covered by my pastern. I tried to hold them back, but the tears started and again I was crying. I was wrapped in a hug by an adult that was radiating love and caring, followed by a couple more bodies that were my size.

“We’re sorry, Snickers, we didn’t ever want you ta get in trouble.”

“Yeah, if I could I’d take it back and wouldn’t have made you jump, too.”

“I’ll give you some of my dessert tonight after supper, if that’ll help.”

Those three fillies were just kinder to me than any event in my recent memory. It wasn’t after soap torture, or tying me in a padded room, or anything else. They were just sorry, in the innocent way children are supposed to be. I heard Rarity whispering and the girls left the hug, I heard the door close, and then there was silence in the room except for my noises.

I sniffled and looked up at the yellow mare who was holding me and I swear I heard bells chime and a harp when I saw her. She was silhouetted by the sun and her wings were partially open giving her the perfect visage of an angel. She was so beautiful I covered my mouth and gasped in awe at her, tears running anew down my cheeks and onto my legs.

“Oh, Snickers, what’s wrong? Do you need anything? How can I help you?”

Her voice was the most beautiful thing I’d ever heard that wasn’t forced or synthesized, it was natural in all its beauty. I sobbed again, but this time it was more in reverence at her. If I was so inclined I’d find religion for the first time and know what to do when meeting a disciple of some heavenly being. Instead I whined and pressed my hooves tighter against my mouth, afraid I’d offend her with my voice as it was.

She looked at me with so much concern and worry I felt like her eyes were gazing into my very soul with absolute purity, and I cried again. This time it was a deep cry, is the best way I can describe it. I bellowed my little voice into her chest and the tighter she held me the more the stress and pain from my life left me.

I was a foal in the arms of an angel, and I was finally safe from everything and everyone that ever meant me harm.

Counselling

“Rarity, why’d you do that to Snickers?!”

“Yeah, he’s your son! You’re supposed to love him and care about him.”

“Instead, yer tuggin’ his ears like a thief grabbin’ unripe zap apples!”

“Fillies, please. I’ve had a difficult enough day than to have to hear you three prattle on about-”

“No,” Sweetie shouted getting the train of ponies to stop, “what’s gotten into you? You’re weird all day, you smell like chocolate when I get home and don’t have any to make me a drink. You tell me I’ve got a nephew out of the blue--”

“Yeah, and she told us you weren’t very nice to him when you introduced him to her,” Scootaloo pushed her way between Sweetie and Rarity, followed by Apple Bloom.

“And ya were talkin’ about some Mister Ed more than ya were carin’ about bein’ all polite so he had ta innerduce himself. That ain’t like ya, Miss Rarity.”

Rarity pressed a polished and smoothed hoof to a spot between her eyes she learned to be a personal pressure point. “Girls, it’s been a very confusing and difficult day. I’m behind on my work, I’ve fostered a foal just this morning…” She looked down at the girls, who were looking between one another somberly.

“Sis, you mean he’s an orphan or something?”

“Or something is more apt,” Rarity mumbled. The gasp the girls made took a second to register with Rarity, who then mentally winced. “No, I don’t mean he’s any of the above. Girls, come with me to the showroom and I’ll tell you all, okay?”

The trio nodded and followed closely to one another while Rarity led them to a small nook she rarely used for relaxing with a good book or to clear her mind. The trio sat on a cushion together that fit one adult mare, Rarity lay on a stout couch across from them. The window was so clear it didn’t seem like it was there, save for the shimmer of enchantments running across its surface that performed a function the fillies didn’t know about, yet.

“Girls, about Snickers. He’s what adults would call a difficult child.”

Sweetie snorted. “So, I live with you and you’re difficult.”

“Yeah, and we don’t tug your ears or bite your nose when we’re upset.”

“So, why’d’ya think it’s alright ta do to him?”

“Huh?” They chorused in a challenge.

Rarity hummed and thought of a good way to handle the situation at their level. “Girls, there are bad parents out in the world.” She waited and their attention became curious. “There are good parents who care for their foals, they feed them, love them, and help them grow. Then there are bad parents who don’t do any of those things, or do them in a bad way. Such as in exchange for things inappropriate for children to do.”

“So,” Apple Bloom looked between her friends, “like makin’ their foals shingle the roof?”

“Or fix their wagon?”

Sweetie hopped, hoping her answer would win. “Making their little sister stand still for hours while her older sister uses her as a dress stand?”

Rarity looked at her sister intently until the filly calmed and sat close to her friends again while Rarity started again.

*…*

Fluttershy held Snickers in her forelegs, her wings fanning slowly to create a current around him that soothed him by brushing the hairs of his coat across his body.

He pulled back and sniffled, looking up at Fluttershy he made sounds like he was going to either hyperventilate or cry again. She lay on her belly and used one of her primary feathers to brush along his muzzle and wipe tears away.

"Why are you so sad? Is there anything I can do to help?"

He sniffled and leaned his cheek into her feathers. He opened his mouth and inhaled a deep shaky breath. Tears spilled from his eyes when he blinked, opening his eyes clearer than before.

He stood and took a hesitant step back from her getting a curious reaction from her. Then, shaking across his front, he lowered his barrel to the floor and touched his nose to the carpet.

Fluttershy sat up and covered her mouth. "Oh, my. Please. I don't know why… Snickers, please, don't bow to me." She pressed her hoof to the carpet and cupped his chin in the frog of her hoof.

"Please, open your eyes." There was a hesitation before he opened them and she gasped at the depth of pain and sorrow she could feel. "You've been through so much, haven't you?"

He nodded, staying in contact with her hoof. When she pulled away he moved with her until she was outside his reach. "No."

She brought her hoof back to him and he rested his cheek against it. "The first word you've said to me… I thought it'd be something more profound, given your recent history."

"What should I say?" He asked quietly with his eyes closed.

“Whatever you’re feeling or maybe if something is bothering you, I’m here for you.”

He opened his eyes feeling calmer than he might have ever felt. “Okay… I... don’t know what to say.”

“Well, my name is Fluttershy and I’m a pegasus. But, I often feel I should be an earth pony because I love all the little creatures. And sometimes I would like to be a unicorn because the magic would make it really easy to help me take care of my little friends’ needs and I’d have more time.

“I was born and spent my first four years in Cloudsdale, then I fell into my current life, and… well, nothing much has happened between then and now that I’d like to talk about without knowing you a little better. Your turn?”

He smiled and sniffled, wiping his nose with his leg. “Well, I’m Snickers. I’m old enough to know better, but I just don’t care. I’ve been in Equestria for a long time, but… not really at the same time. It’s hard to explain, but it’s so beautiful here I can’t imagine living anywhere else, not for the rest of my life, if I’m lucky.

“I was stuck at an asylum for a few days before here, and nothing really happened there, so yeah. That’s me,” he finished with a shrug.

Fluttershy knew a bit more about him, but also knew to take the report with a grain of salt, and she intended to learn the truth about him no matter how long it took. “Um… there’s a lot of talk about you… um… personal private time that nopony should be with you during, and… I was… um…”

“Do you mean my sexual nature?” She eeped and cringed back, then hesitantly nodded. “Sheesh, we don’t have to talk about it. You’re obviously uncomfortable.”

“I-it’s just that you’re so open.”

“That’s what she said… wait…” Snickers thought about the lackluster jest, then looked at Fluttershy and cowered back from her glare. “I’m sorry, Miss Fluttershy.”

“I’m not alright with young colts or fillies talking like poorly mannered adults. It really upsets me and that’s not what ponies should make each other feel. Also,” she relaxed with an exhale, “I’m only Fluttershy, I don’t need any titles.”

“Y-yes, Miss Fluttershy. I’m sorry, Fluttershy!”

“Oh, please, don’t be worried. I won’t be upset with you as long as you’re a nice colt and you treat others with respect. Can you do that for me?” she asked, this time she had realized what had caused such a dramatic reaction and took advantage. She opened her wings and sat until she was blocking the light. He nodded, eyes wide in awe at her visage.

“Very good. Now then, Snickers, would you like to talk about your day?”

He gulped wetly and watched her as she lay down at his level. “Uh, yeah… if that’s okay with you… Fluttershy.”

She smiled when he spoke her name. It wasn’t very becoming of a stallion to fawn over her, but a colt was certainly adorable. “Whenever you’re ready, you may begin.”

*...*

Rarity sat in her spot holding Sweetie against her underbelly, forelegs crossed over the filly’s own crossed forelegs. “So, do you understand now?”

Scootaloo and Apple Bloom sat in contemplation. “So, what yer sayin’... is that Snickers has a mysterious past that we’re supposed to teach him to be comfortable with…”

“...So that he can tell us about it and not feel embarrassed or ashamed because there’s nothing in anypony’s past they should feel bad about at our age.” Scootaloo finished. Rarity nodded and the duo pumped their hooves in success.

“Rarity?” Sweetie asked. “What if we ask him about his past? Can we just do that and save time?”

Rarity rested her chin atop Sweetie’s mane and gently rocked from side to side. “No, darling. The reason he’s meeting with Fluttershy right now is to show him he can feel safe around adults. If you ask he may distrust you, or everypony around him. It’s happened before, but foals run away from things they distrust.”

Scootaloo covered her mouth. “I don’t want him to leave, he just got here. What about getting him his cutie mark?”

“Ah know, let’s get him as soon as he’s done and take him crusadin’ with us before he changed his mind!”

Sweetie pulled and Rarity let her go so the filly could join her friends. “Yeah, we can show him around town and show him the clubhouse before we induct him as our first male member.”

Rarity’s thought slid slightly off topic at the phrasing, but she was brought back when the girls cheered their club name and high hoofed each other. “Well, you have things well planned out. I certainly hope you all have a good time. I’ll prepare some snacks for you before you leave and have your fun.

A chorus of cheering fillies ran around her as she walked with a couple near trips as the fillies darted under her while playing some game or another that she couldn’t be bothered to learn; as long as it didn’t interfere with her progress.

“Girls, please! Talk quieter and stop playing, you may interrupt their bonding time. It’s very important Fluttershy has time to help him relax. It’ll be up to you three to teach him how to adjust and interact while I will offer guidance and direction as a parent should.”

The CMC looked between one another and Sweetie Belle was stopped from speaking by a yellow hoof on her leg and a shaking head. Sweetie exhaled her breath without speaking and took a seat at the table between her friends. “So, how long do you think it’ll be?”

Tour and Lunch

Snickers followed Fluttershy down the stairs and pulled his eyes from the mare he’d spent half an hour talking and crying with to gather with the fillies that were waiting for him with grins on their faces, he noticed chewed vegetables between most of their teeth as well.

“Hi-ya, Snickers. Ah packed ya some snacks Rarity made, wanna come along fer a little tour’a the town?”

“I... maybe, what about Fluttershy?”

Scootaloo looked past Sweetie to see the mares talking. “What? Oh, she’s gonna hafta head on out ta get back to work.”

“What? You mean I made her leave work to see me?” He asked in a worried tone and looked at the content mare that walked with Rarity out of the display room and into the kitchen.

“What? Nah, don’t worry, she works with the critters around town. Why, she’s as good with animals as my family is with apples!”

“Or as good as my sister is with dressmaking!”

“Or as awesome as Rainbow Dash is at everything!” Scootaloo hopped into the air and buzzed her wings, slowing her fall to a gentle floating.

The others rolled their eyes while Snickers was tempted to follow Fluttershy with his eyes, then neck, but when he started to walk toward the mares he was blocked by a white blur that solidified into his aunt. “Hey, let’s go out the back. Adults like to talk about boring stuff and we have a lot to show you about our hometown.”

“Yeah, Rainbow’s cloudhouse is the best part, but there’s the school, bakery, candy shop, joke shop, hat shop…”

“While she goes on about all that, let’s actually show you! C’mon, just follow my bow and we’ll tell ya everything ya need ta know!”

“...ster Clover, he runs the… hey, wait for me!”

Snickers winced at the sunlight as he walked out into it, almost covering his eyes with his foreleg, but he knew he’d fall flat on his chest and smack his chin on the ground, which was not something he enjoyed. He saw Apple Bloom turn sharply left and followed her to the other girls who were looking at a map on the ground held between Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle’s forehooves.

“Where’d you get this map? Don’t say it just magically showed up from a flower, please.”

“Hehe, you’re silly, Snickers,” Sweetie giggled and lifted her hoof to cover her mouth, only to gasp and re-flatten the map when her hoof let it go. “No, I got this from Rarity. We drew it with her help while you were with Fluttershy. It’s got the best and most important parts of Ponyville, then it’s got the actual best stuff that Rarity didn’t wanna say but we added.”

He looked at the map and noticed a huge difference between the well practiced calligraphy and artistically drawn two dimensional buildings that were representations of actual places, compared to the crayon drawn boxy shapes that indicated ten times as many places Rarity had mentioned.

He looked at the main spots and sights of town well written including popular local businesses and places everypony could go to socialize or relax. The library, park, town hall, and Sugarcube Corner were most notable. The ones the girls added included green scribbled circles that had partially written words like ‘Rstspot’, ‘chlAx’, ‘Eatnz’, and the best one he squinted at that all the girls noticed.

“What’s that mean?” he asked focusing his attention.

“Only the best place all year round!”

He turned his head left and right, trying to see if one eye would help him read it better. “Chlanbydlak? What the fuck’s that mean?”

The girls hopped back from him while gasping. Scootaloo was the unlucky one because a bug got sucked into her mouth when she gasped. Her friends ran to her side when she pressed her hooves to her throat and started coughing. “Scoots, can ya breathe? How many hairs are in my bangs?”

“We trained for this! We trained for this!” Sweetie hopped between all her hooves in a panic while Apple Bloom asked nonsensical questions, waving a foreleg in front of Scootaloo who was just coughing and struggling to get her earth pony friend off her so she could roll to her belly.

“Scoots, how fast does Rainbow fly? Don’t go inta the light, granny says ya need sunblock if yer in the light too long! Sweetie, she might not make it, should I go get help?!”

“We trained for this!”

“Oh, for fucks sake.” Snickers grumbled and shoved Apple Bloom back with a foreleg and then brought the same leg back quickly and landed a punch on Scootaloo’s arm.

“Auchet!” She coughed and yelped, sending a moth covered with spit into the grass where it was forgotten about. “Why’d you hit me for?”

She was tackled by Sweetie Belle, who was all too happy to have her friend survive such a harrowing experience. Apple Bloom joined in the hug, surrounding Scootaloo with happiness. Snickers looked on with disgust that was shadowed by Scootaloo. “Freakin’ foolers, I knew it,” he snorted.

The trio gasped, this time looking between one another to make sure they weren’t going to die from sudden onset insect inhalation, then glared at Snickers. “Ya know, that’s some bad talk ya got there. Ya don’t wanna get yer mouth washed out, do ya?”

His ears fell at the memory for a few seconds before they turned back and he frowned. “Yeah, bring it on. I’ll eat a fuckin’ bar of soap for dinner tonight, nothin’s gonna stop me from bein’ me.”

There was a door slam and his ears fell, his tail curled around his flank, and he slouched, looking at the door behind him. It wasn’t that door, but the voice that called a farewell from above him perked him right back up. “Hi Snickers, have a good day playing with your friends!”

He smiled as she flew away and then noticed the trio looking at him with smirks. “You have a potty mouth, but you have a crush on Miss Shy, don’t you?”

“What?! No, I don’t have a stupid crush on Fluttershy… and she doesn’t like to be called Miss, so stop it!”

“Ohhh, he does have a crush!”

“No, I don’t!”

They giggled and started to sing. “Snickers and Fluttershy, sittin’ in a tree! Bein’ each other’s special some-po-ny!”

He was about to shout, but it turned into a snort. “What? Seriously, that’s how you sing that?”

They looked at him, still smiling. “Well, we didn’t get ta the part where ya kiss, but if ya’d give us a minute, lover boy.”

He sighed and shook his head, looking the direction to where Fluttershy had flown toward. “Nah, it’s too late. Ya said you were gonna show me around this podunk little ball of hay and dirt, where’s my tour?”

“Hey, it’s way better than Podunk, and there’s way more than hay and dirt.”

“Yeah, there’s mud, too!” Scootaloo added with pride.

Sweetie and Apple Bloom snapped their attention to Scootaloo who was oblivious to their looks, focusing her energy on challenging the new colt in their midst.

“Yeah, no surprise there. Let’s just get goin’, I’m hungry. Got and burgers around here?”

“Oh, yeah! That’s what we forgot to add to the map, let’s go to M and M’s!”

They cheered and made sure he was in their group before happily trotting to the eatery, while he plotted along with them staying more stoic and somewhat anxious.

Several minutes passed full of turns with excited fillies pointing to two different things at a time telling him their own, sometimes shared, experiences at the locations as they went the whole way. Snickers was overwhelmed after nearly a minute, so he shut their rambling out of his mind and thought about his weirdly emotional day.

Crying, whining, being submissive… if I was like that back home I’d be lucky to survive a beating. What’s gotten into me lately? Ever since I got here I’ve been a mess, is it because I’m a kid again?

“Snickers?”

The scream into his ear shocked him from the end of his inner monologue to his very core and he screamed in reply, scrambling from the shrill voice, falling over, then looking at the orange filly with a shit eating grin.

“See, I told you yelling at him would work.”

“Ya didn’t have ta do it that way!”

“Yeah, you really scarred him,” Sweetie reached with a foreleg to help him up.

He took it and once standing he rubbed his ear. “Fuck you,” he hissed, “my ear’s gonna be ringing for an hour.”

He saw a blur of yellow before a sharp pain radiated across his muzzle and spread to a dull throb in a couple heartbeats. “When ya cuss, ya get a swat on the muzzle! That’s what Applejack says and Ah only got it twice before Ah learned my lesson.” she said proudly.

The pain was annoying, but not as bad as many other injuries he’d had. It was like getting slapped; only at the end of his muzzle. He sniffled, glad there wasn’t blood or significant damage done. He was preparing to kick some dirt in her face and give her a line of swears she’d never imagined working together, but stopped when he saw a yellow pegasus fly above.

He noticed it wasn’t Fluttershy, but he’d calmed enough in that instant to regather his wits. “Whatever. Can we get some food, or what?”

“See gals, works like a charm.”

Sweetie glanced at Snickers as she passed while Scootaloo and Apple Bloom followed her, with him following at the end. Once inside he noticed the rustic feel of the building that looked like a rare steak with tables that were literally picnic tables cut into thirds with new legs added. The chairs were benches angled for a pony to sit on while maintaining a natural posture, and it all smelled like greasy food.

“Finally, something kinda normal.”

“Yeah. They have so many things to choose from?! If they don’t have it, you’ll have to go to Canterlot to find it.”

“Yeah! Even Rainbow Dash eats here, like, every couple days!”

“Yeah, mah sis doesn’t eat here, though. But she’s just that way. See, everything here is pony food!”

“Except that part at the far left,” Scootaloo pointed, “there’s some meats on there. Almost nopony eats off there, but there’s a lot of reasons to get something if a diet needs it or the veggies aren’t enchanted right.”

“Wait, you mean you actually eat meat? Like, at this time and place?”

Sweetie smirked. “Well, yeah. Grass and hay don’t give enough energy for higher intelligence to work. How do you think we live on four meals a day instead of eating constantly?”

“Oh, well, I dunno. I just figured it was magic.”

The trio giggled. “We thought you hated magic as an answer, lover boy.”

“Whatever!” He marched in line and looked at the teenage stallion behind the counter. “Got any squirrel?”

“Nope. Chipmunks either. Most of our meats are from oceans and lakes. Only carnivores have to worry about the heavy reds, which aren’t for little kids like you.”

“Well, I want something from a fish that only has two eyes and normal skin. Can you do that for me?”

The girls and clerk looked at him.

“...Would you like fries and a drink with that for three bits extra?”

Snickers grinned while he thought of the meal he was about to get. He was nudged back by Sweetie Belle who placed her order and then led him to a table. He looked at the seat like a dog might look at a lobster, thankfully he learned a lot faster and when Sweetie climbed onto it and sat he was able to copy her.

Barely balancing at first, he planted his forehooves on the table and smiled awkwardly at his tablemate. “Got it on the first try.”

She giggled. “Yeah, but you’re sitting like it’s your first time sitting in a chair. Wait, this isn’t really your first time, is it?” she asked and when he looked away she looked him over. He sat awkwardly, stiffly, and seemed like he was rocking on his thighs just between his flanks rather than resting on his haunches like a normal pony would sit.

He was looking under the table at his dangling hind hooves while she was watching him, thus she didn’t notice when Scootaloo playfully slapped her friend on the back. Sweetie tipped forward enough to land her barrel on the table’s edge as Apple Bloom hopped over the seat and sat with a little scoot to get comfortable. Scootaloo went to the other side of the table, taking a seat close to Snickers.

“So, first time sitting at a table?” she asked with another grin. He looked at her and contemplated huffing through his nose, cleansing it across her face and, more importantly, her perfectly white teeth.

Sweetie answered for him, “Yeah, maybe it is.” She said with obvious inflection that the others nodded to. “So, what’d you order?” she looked at Scootaloo.

“Ah ordered the bean burger supreme with anchovy sauce. Scoots ordered a Hay Burger combo.”

“You know it’s good, don’t deny it.”

Sweetie smirked. “For the biggest fan of the most awesome pony, you sure do eat light.”

“Yeah, so?”

“Just that Rainbow Dash eats like, two burger combo’s a day when she comes by. Twilight goes for three number ones. Applejack sneaks a fish patty when she delivers apple juice. And you eat a junior burger,” her grin grew into a smile, “so, are you trying to fit into a dress for a special colt with a snail on his flank?”

Apple Bloom gasped in surprise and looked from Sweetie to Scootaloo. “Ah knew it! Y’all’re sweet on him! I saw it last week at recess!”

Scootaloo stopped sputtering in shock. “I do not! That’s a rumor and lie! I asked him if I could borrow his eraser, that’s all,” she huffed as a blush grew.

“Sure, Ah know Ah ask ta borrow erasers during recess and not in class, especially when yer best friends sit right near ya.”

“It… I… totally not true,” she crossed her forelegs over her chest and looked away indignantly. The other girls laughed and Snickers looked between them with a small smile.

So, they’re just normal girls. Interesting, most back home would be--

“And, here ya go. Enjoy yer meals,” a mare said blandly and dropped the tray an inch from the tabletop with three empty cups with lids and straws on it before walking away.

Sweetie and Scootaloo took a moment to get drinks while Apple Bloom watched them to make sure she got her favorite drink. Drinks on the table, appetites high and patience low, a silent bell rang and they dug in.

The fillies took to their meals with a gusto that reminded him of others fighting over food, only they were sharing everything off the tray and trading bites between sandwiches. “Hey, aren’t cha gonna eat?”

He reached and took his plate from the tray and looked at the burger with a bite already taken out of it. Some hay fries slid to him from one of the fillies that were numming and humming through their mouths full of food. He took a bite from the bitten spot and he thought his taste buds were exploding. He hummed loudly and swallowed without chewing before giggling and going for another bite, this one taking a quarter of the sandwich.

He didn’t care that the fillies were happily watching him while he chewed and moaned around his food. He didn’t care he was leaning too far back. He didn’t care when he fell onto his back. It was totally worth it to him, and as he rolled to his hooves he stumbled on the cloth covering his hind end and caught himself before he fell over.

He heard the girls go silent before they tittered and quickly whispered to one another. A couple of mares caught his eye when they pointed at him in a way to tell him something, and then he noticed a cold breeze somewhere it shouldn’t have been. He turned and saw something sway under him and, without a thought of what else to do, he turned and leapt at the cloth.

The girls surrounded him and he waited for them to tease and mock him for exposing himself in public. “Alright, nothin’ ta see here. Just a colt that loved his food, go about yer business.”

“Yeah, don’t look at him. It’s uncouth to do that when somepony doesn’t want you to.”

“Right, what they said.”

He opened his eyes to see white legs in front of him. A glance up showed Sweetie Belle’s side and her head facing away. He looked around him at the other two and when he saw they were doing the same he felt a rush of relief. He quickly turned the fabric around, tossed it over his back, secured it with the open pins, and when he stood he slid it back.

His heart was in his throat when he cleared it. “Oh, all fixed up. Good deal, ya still- ugh!”

Sweetie and Scootaloo leaned back when he leapt at Apple Bloom and hugged her. Not one of them was ever expecting that, so while Apple Bloom stood in surprise he just hugged her. The mares at the farther side of the room aww’ed and a few seconds later Sweetie and Scootaloo hugged him, joined finally by Apple Bloom.

“Uh, thanks, Snickers. Why the sudden affection?”

He exhaled a warm breath across her neck that tingled her tail. “You’re the first one to ever stand up for me. I… didn’t know it felt so good to not have to take it.”

“Awwww,” they all cooed and hugged him tighter. They broke the hug when they felt him moving against them. “So, are we good to eat, or should I just eat what’s left?”

“Scoots, ya know ya can’t eat if ya wanna--” Apple Bloom was cut off when Scootaloo leapt at her friend and tackled her starting a short wrestle that ended with the earth pony on top. “As Ah was sayin…”

“Just let it go, AB,” Sweetie interrupted the duo before the manager could reach them, “let’s eat so we can get Snickers to the Sugarcube Corner and then the Clubhouse. We’ve still got a lot to do!”

The wrestlers broke it up and returned to their seats while Snickers reared up and rested his hooves on the table, taking ravenous bites of his burger until it was gone, followed by his hay fries he licked into his mouth with his tongue.

“So, gals, what’re we gettin’ fer dessert?”

“Pie!”

“No, cupcakes!”

“Pie.”

“Cupcakes.”

“Pie!”

“Cut it out, ya two! We’ll decide when we’re walkin’, besides; we’re gettin’ smoothies.”

“Ooo, good idea,” the other two said in unison.

Scootaloo looked at the colt in their group. “What about you, Snickers? Gonna shake it up with us?”

“Shake it up?” he swallowed from his straw some of the sweetest strawberry soda he’d had in his life. “Oh, yeah, sure.” He looked at the messy table with crumbs everywhere, but the food was gone. “We were really hungry, weren’t we?”

“Eeyup, now we’re gettin’ dessert! C’mon, let’s go!”

There was a chorus of approval from the CMC’s and high hooves, then they looked expectantly at Snickers and all motioned to their hooves in the air. He had a rush of a feeling he’d rarely had before and then moved quickly, reaching his hoof up and clacking it with theirs. A shared grin and they all laughed, racing out of the restaurant and towards their next destination.

Tour and Conflict

The trio galloped around ponies and under a couple that shouted their disapproval as they made their way to their next destination. Snickers had finally started to smile, having fun just running and feeling a rush that wasn’t accompanied with fear or anger. There was nothing but joy in the world now, and it surrounded him outside the three fillies guiding their path.

The fresh air was invigorating and his legs hadn’t gotten so much use in a long time. His hooves had been trimmed, too; by a professional not just chipped to a manageable level using whatever he could find. It didn’t hurt when his hooves pounded the ground, the rocks didn’t jab into sensitive cut up frogs, and there was a fresh breeze running through his mane.

The girls took his onto a scenic route at his request to burn off some of the food and sugar he’d taken in, so he could have more desserts. The farmland at the edge of town was sparsely populated and begged to be snacked upon when nopony was looking.

For several minutes it was paradise. Then he ran into Scootaloo and tumbled over her, landing on his side with a thud, sliding across the packed gravel before stopping. His first thought was to shout at her and shove her to prove his point, then he heard something that grated his nerves. “Ha-ha. Nice tumble, blank flanks.

“Maybe you’ll get a cutie mark as a clown, since all you seem to be good at is tumbling into each other.”

The other crusaders reached them, panting. They started to help Scootaloo up and dusted her off. “Go away you two. We’re showing the new colt around town and we’re not gonna listen to your teasing.”

“Did you hear that, Diamond Tiara? The Cutie Mark Lame-saders aren’t gonna listen to us. They’re so far below us they can’t even understand what we’re saying.” The fillies bumped hooves, tittering.

Snickers got up and looked at the scratches across his side.

“And who’s this? A new colt for you fillies to add to your little herd?” Diamond mocked. “Why don’t you come with me, you and I can start one and I’ll actually take care of you; unlike some poor fillies. And I’ll get you a skirt that really shows your assets, because that rag isn’t worth wiping with.”

He snorted and glared.

“Diamond, I don’t think he can understand us either. Maybe if we talk really slow,” Silver said moving closer and sneering. “Are… you… dumb… or… do… you… just… have… low… standards?”

“Girls, stay back,” he said to the CMC.

“Snickers, ya don’t wanna--”

“Snickers?! Ha, his name is meant to be laughed at! Hey Snickers, can I hear a blank flank like you laugh for me? I’ll give you a shiny new bit if you do!”

Silver and Diamond laughed an annoying laugh, ready to end their teasing with their chant. “Bump, bump-”

“Why don’t you go fuck yourselves, then each other in the middle of the market, for a shiny bit?”

They stumbled and nearly fell over, standing quickly and looking at him in shock. “Wh-what?! How dare you--”

“How dare you bitches walk up to me and talk to me like I’m some pussy, ready for a pounding? Do you know what you’re getting yourselves into, talking trash to me? I’ll stomp you so hard you’ll limp for two days! Get the fuck outta here before I open a bottle of kick flank on you!” he reared and stomped his hooves on the ground in challenge.

The duo lowered their bodies getting on guard. “It’s rude to hit a colt, but you’re the rudest colt I’ve ever heard of!” Diamond ran at him followed by Silver, intent on scaring him and making him run away like every other colt they’d ever come across. They didn’t know anything about this one, though.

Quicker than she could react, he leapt at her with a twist and brought his hind leg across her head, dropping her to the ground heavily. He landed dragging his hind hooves behind him just in time to see a startled Silver Spoon begin stopping by dropping her hind end for leverage, only to get an uppercut just below her sternum followed by a shove with his other foreleg sending her to the ground beside her friend.

The CMC screamed and ran to the fight just as he brought a foreleg back and kicked the top of Diamond’s muzzle. “If anypony asks, you tripped when running, got it!” he shouted at the fillies that’d curled up on themselves crying, Diamond covered her muzzle with a pastern while Silver dry heaved between sniffles.

“Snickers! What in Celestia’s name are ya doin’?! Ya can’t fight like that,” Apple Bloom admonished. The other two nodded in agreement with frowns.

“What, they started it. I finished it. Simple as that.”

“Colts don’t fight, Snickers! And who taught you to do that!” Sweetie pointed at the fillies on the ground. He kicked gravel and dirt at them. “Stop that!”

“What? They’re worth less than the ground I kicked at them, they have to belittle us to feel better about themselves. Now they know that if they try that again, I’ll remind them why it’s not safe to gallop on dirt roads. Right?” Diamond barely nodded.

“Snickers, you need to stop! You’re going too far with all this.”

“No, too far is that if these two start shit again. I’ll crawl in their windows at night and beat ‘em half to death,” he snarked back and stood taller.

“No, Snickers. If you do that then you can’t join our club, do you want that?”

He readied a classic smart ass reply, but stopped himself when a warm breeze the smelled of fresh apples blew past him. He stood still, mouth open while he thought, then he closed his mouth and swallowed to wetten his dry throat. He shook his head and exhaled. “I wanna join, but I meant what I said about knocking sense into these two if they do it again.”

They narrowed their eyes at him, but thought it was the best they’d get away from the scene. “Should we get them some help?”

“No way, Sweetie. It may have been wrong, but they had that coming for the past year. I say let them get home and let their butlers patch ‘em up. Us poor ponies have to get some dessert to celebrate this moment with our new colt friend.”

“Scootaloo!” Sweetie slapped her on the foreleg.

“What? Ah! I meant colt friend. Not like boyfriend or special somepony, sheesh. Psh. ‘Guh-ross’.”

Her friends nodded in agreement and gave Snickers the stink eye while walking past him. “You go ahead, I’ve gotta apologize to these two for what I did. It’s the right thing to do, after all.”

They smiled and nodded to each other. “That’s mighty nice of ya. Catch up quick, alright?”

“You bet, heh-heh…” He turned so his rear was facing the two fillies, lifted his tail, and grunted. He smiled, listening to the fillies groan in disgust as they saw when fell from him onto the ground. When he was done he took a step forward and scraped his hoof along the ground kicking four fresh road apples at them. Diamond rolled away but Silver wasn’t as lucky, finally losing her lunch as firm, still warm road apple landed against her foreleg.

“Like I said,” he said softly over his shoulder, “you tripped and you’re not going to tease anypony again. Right?”

Diamond sniffled loudly, hobbling to her friend with a stagger as blood dripped onto the gravel from her muzzle. “Y-yes, sir. We won’t. We promise.”

“Great! I hope we can be friends and put all this mess behind us.” He said happily and took to a gallop to catch up to the girls, who giggled and ran with him back toward town, leaving the terrible duo groaning behind them.

Tour and Dessert

“Well, Ah say it was mighty big of ya to make amends with those two. They might not deserve what they got from ya, but fer a colt ya handled it like a pro.”

“Yeah, those were some pretty cool moves. Where’d you learn that flying spin kick? And then you landed and--”

“Hush about that, Scoots. We don’t wanna let other ponies know what happened.”

“Oh, yeah,” she leaned closer to Snickers, “we’ll talk about it later, okay?”

“There it is! Sugarcube Corner, where the best stuff happens.”

He looked at the building and stopped. The girls made a couple paces before they stopped and rolled their eyes. They turned back and nudged him on by bumping him forward with their bodies. “Hey, q-quit it! Damn… that building looks delicious,” he felt his mouth watering as they got closer. The scent of baked goods called to him, and if he were able he’d float away from the earth and its tether upon him. He’d let his nose follow the scent and lead him to the Nirvana of endless sweetness he smelled.

His ears moved quickly and he realized he was near the building itself. He lost maybe a minute in sensory overload, but now that he was close enough he broke away from his handlers and ran to one of the walls, opened his mouth, and took a bite onto the hard surface. His teeth rattled when he contacted the hard plastic exterior and his heart shattered at the same time he fell flat onto the ground, realization striking him like a baseball bat to the back of his head.

“We tried ta tell ya, but ya were in lala land. It just looks like candy, it ain’t really edible.”

“Yeah, sheesh. Everypony tries that at least once. That’s why the whole thing is made from moulded plastic now.” Scootaloo tapped the wall to show him.

“Exactly, now are we gonna get some treats, or are we gonna have to skip this stop and--”

“No! Apple Bloom, please! Let me in, take me to the yummy stuff,” he sniffled from the ground and looked up at her, reaching for her hooves with his. She stepped back and looked at Sweetie Belle.

“Ugh, fine. Snickers, if you get up and stop acting weird I’ll buy you your own smoothie and a cupcake.”

He hopped to his hooves with a gleam in his eye. “Really? What flavor?” he asked while standing on the tip of his hooves.

Scootaloo leaned in and whispered harshly, “Whatever you want. Let’s just go so you stop embarrassing us.”

“Whatever you say, boss,” he saluted and started walking.

“Wrong way, door’s right over here.”

He slowed, turned in a short arc, and followed Apple Bloom inside. He looked around while following and was pleased the line was short. A blue mare with her mane done to look like icing was taking a stallion’s order when they got in line. “Snickers, ya like bananas? Carrots? Berries?”

“Yes!” he answered readily.

She shook her head in good nature and spent a moment talking with her friends while he looked around the room. It was a nice bakery, ponies sat at some tables set against the wall, but it seemed like most of the business was to go. He looked at the walls and cocked his head at the fresh baked goods just sitting out in the open air, then his eye caught something and he looked. There wasn’t anything, but he still felt like he wanted to stay close to the girls.

That was when he was scooped up from behind and the smooth outer wall of a hoof rubbed through his mane and against his scalp. “Hey, who’s this little guy?! Girls, is he your new friend? Gasp! Is he new to Ponyville?! Where’s the rest of his family? I have planning to do and,” Pinkie looked behind her at the fillies and noticed their quick and intense ‘stop it’ motions.

“Oh, he doesn’t like to be picked up! I get it,” she said dropping him and resuming where she stopped. “I have to know how many to plan for. Is it a herd of a few, on only one and two? Maybe there are three plus a little baby!”

She dodged the swing he swung at her by leaning back. “Shut up!”

“Gasp, again! That’s no way to talk to your new friend. Hi, I’m Pinkie Pie.”

He glared at her. “You’re trouble. I don’t want anything to do with you or your weird head.”

“Wow, for a colt you sure are feisty. Girls, I know how to fix this problem.” She dodged a spinning kick and held a cupcake to him. “Have a cupcake!” she reached behind his head and tugged his mane. His mouth opened almost automatically and she stuffed it in, closed his jaw, then moved it up and down for him.

He shrugged her off with a flailing of her limbs and she just grinned at him with a familiar, terrifying smile that would haunt his dreams. That moment was also when he moved his tongue across the baked amazingness in his mouth. The taste was divine and, once again, he giggled while falling over. This time he didn’t expose himself, he wasn’t even affected the same way, but he made for an awkward, yet positive sight.

“Thif, if da beft fing Ah’ve evow tafe’ted.”

“There’s more where that came from! What’s your name, new bestest friend?”

He moaned quietly while getting back up, so Sweetie Answered. “He’s Snickers, he’s from far away; but if you wanna know more you’ll have to talk with Rarity because she said only adults need to know about these things, but I know I’m adult enough to know the difference, but she won’t tell me anything because…” she stopped when she noticed Pinkie wasn’t there. A clatter of metal pots and pans broke the serenity of the moment, then Pinkie ran out of the kitchen and to the foals.

“Here you are! Three smoothies, a muffin, and a cupcake,” Pinkie said gleefully, “enjoy! I’ve got some serious partying to do.”

Snickers finally gathered his wits and looked at her. “You’re gonna party and not invite us? Rude.”

“What? Me, rude?” Pinkie pointed to herself and grinned manically. “Never, my little pony. This is a party everypony will be dying to attend.” He leaned back and slid under the table, curling around his tail and petting it. “What got into him?” Pinkie asked, shrugged, then hopped away humming a happy tune.

“Hey, ya doin’ okay?”

“Pink monster… those eyes, always watching. So many eyes, always watching, never blinking, never a moment alone.”

Apple Bloom looked above the table at her friends and the all sagged in defeat, slipping under the table with him. “There, now. Ya don’t have ta worry, she’s just really happy.”

“And she likes to make others smile and have fun, too! Right, Scoots?”

Scootaloo tapped her chin and looked at some gum wadded under the table. “Well, it was kinda weird how she kinda got a red haze behind her, her eyes seemed like portals into the darkest depths, and her voice took on that vibrating deep tone when she talked to him about ponies dying… but other than that, she’s pretty cool, Snickers. Get over it and join us up top,” she placed her forehooves on the cushion and was yanked back down by her tail.

“Hey, watch my tail, it’s sensitive, Apple Bloom.”

Apple Bloom whispered harshly. “Ya gotta head harder than a cider barrel if ya think yer helpin’, look at what ya did to him.” Looking down, Scootaloo grimaced at the colt that was sucking his hoof and whining. “He doesn’t like Pinkie yet, so help us get him outta here. We’ll take our drinks ta go.”

Snickers mumbled unheard. "Not scared of Pinkie. Those eyes, that smile... just like him..."

Scootaloo raised a forehoof, paused, then nodded. “Got it. Hey, Pinkie?!”

“Who needs some to go cups?” Pinkie asked, appearing from beneath the bench Scootaloo and Sweetie were sitting on. A loud yelp from Snickers was all the warning they got before he gasped and fell to his side.

“Snickers?! Is he dead? What do we do?”

“Everypony, stay calm… we trained for this. We trained for this!”

Pinkie lifted the table and watched two fillies panicking over the colt while Sweetie sat in place chanting a steady mantra. “Wow, if this is a ritual sacrifice for to go cups, you’re going about it all wrong! Where’s the glyph calling to the dark god of syrups, or to the emperor of the coldest realm, Hag’n Da’as; ruler of all that is sweet, cold, and creamy?

“Silly fillies, he just passed out from terror brought on certainly by unknown means unrelated to anything, anypony, or anyone in our universe and timeline could ever understand,” she slid Snickers from the floor onto her back and gestured for the fillies to follow her.

“Wh-where’re ya takin’ us? Is he gonna be okay? Do we have ta call some emperor from another dimension ta help us, really?”

“Psh, no! Only if you want the best to go cups filled with the most amazing ice cream ever! This colt just needs some warm air and this single ice cube.”

Once outside, Pinkie pulled an ice cube from under her leg and held it, steaming in the sunlight. She turned him to the side and blocked the view of what she was doing, but they could still see his face.

Their worry grew with each passing second until his eyes opened and he screamed in a very adult way that sounded nothing like a filly running from a bee toward her friends.

“What the fucking shit is your problem you walking pink fart factory?! Who the hell shoves anything there! Ugh, I feel sick; it’s still cold! Owie, owie! Get it out!” he screamed between swearing and sat down, scooting on his rear. “No, don’t you fucking come near me! I need a toilet! Lord, face fuck me for all the wrongs I’ve done! Just get me away from her,” he turned and ran away leaving dozens of ponies gawking as he ran.

Most eyes turned back to Pinkie, who would turn more pink if she could have after that. “I… did not expect that reaction. Here you go, girls. Don’t use that language, I’ve gotta wash my ears out with hot water and an extra foamy bubble bath,” she said flatly and walked backwards into a bush.

The CMC watched him turn a corner, then looked back at the unmoving bush, then to one another. “Ugggh, do we have to get him? He’s more trouble than anything in the history of ever.”

“Yes, Scootaloo, we do! He’s part of my family now, and think about it; what would you do if Pinkie put an ice cube in your back there place?” Apple Bloom and Scootaloo inhaled sharply and clenched, dropping their tails to hide themselves. “Exactly.”

“Okay, you don’t have ta be so graphic. That’s some mighty bad imagery ya gave us just now.”

“There’s a lotta things I’d do, but putting ice in there isn’t one of them.”

The other two looked at Scootaloo, who blushed. “C’mon, let’s go find him before he starts more trouble that can be traced back to us.”

Taking the lead, and a smoothie in her foreleg, Scootaloo walked on three legs in the direction he went while sipping her fruity goodness. “Ah wonder… if he doesn’t drink his smoothie, maybe we could share it?”

“No way, Apple Bloom! That’s my nephew’s and I won’t let you drink it if you’re thinking about it. He needs all the food he can get so he grows up big and strong.”

“I thought he was your brother?”

“Nuh-uh. I thought he was her cousin.”

Sweetie sipped her drink and shook her head. “No, see; Rarity adopted him…”

A Moment by a River

The girls found Snickers in the small river that led through the outskirts of Sweet Apple Acres through the west orchards sitting and scowling at his reflection in the crystal clear water. He didn’t look up, but his ears told them he’d heard them approach. “Heya, Snickers. Ya found my family farm, what’d’ya think?”

He raised a hoof and splashed it into the water, scattering his image and turning his back to them. Sweetie Belle ran into the water and moved to his front and raised a hoof to her lips. She moved to hug him but stopped at his out stretched leg. The others approached, Scootaloo setting his melted drink in the grass before she joined them.

Scootloo groaned quietly when she reached her friends. “What now?” She looked at him and rolled her eyes. “Why’re you crying? You got away from Pinkie and made everypony look like idiots.”

She stood and splashed water at her. “Shut it! You don’t know what it’s like,” she wiped his eyes with his leg, “you’ve never been hurt like that. You’ve never had to fight every day for food or to not die! I get to this place and day fucking one I’m in a Tartarus like I thought I’d left behind me,” he grimaced and sat down in the water again.

“Don’t waste your time with me, I’m a lost cause no matter what. Just… go live your lives and build a future your friends can live and die in.”

“Hey, you don’t have to be a jerk about everything. It’s your fault you got your self into whatever you’ve--” he leapt at her, missing her by a second with a quick pegasi dodge.

“Shut… up!” He screamed loud enough to send nearby fruit bats into the sky and his voice to echo. He seethed at her and she stumbled back with a primal fear of being attacked by a stallion three times his size. “You don’t know what it’s like to live in hell, you never will,” he didn’t hold back his tears as they melted into the water they all stood in.

“Snickers,” Apple Bloom said quietly, “please, ya can tell us and get it off yer chest. Ah promise, we might not understand it all, but we’ll be here fer you the whole way.”

“Yeah, I Pinkie Promise that no matter what, I’ll try to love you even more. We’re family, we have to take care of each other, right?”

He took a step back and whined, looking between the two fillies before moving to them quickly and wrapping a leg around each, crying freely. “I… you’re so kind to me, why? How can you be so nice and do what you do?”

They hugged him back, Scootaloo watched from beside them and stayed back.

“We’re just us, nothin’ can change a pony as long as we’re true to ourselves.”
A few minutes later and they sat in the grass, their coats nearly dry and Snickers sucked his melted but slightly chilled drink in their silence. “Well, I guess I can tell you some of my story… but you have to keep it between us.” They all promised, Scootaloo staying quiet through the words and sluggish through the motions.

“I worked as what’s called an electrical engineer back home. It was a different place and the words I use don’t translate into Ponish, so they’re meaningless until they’re discovered later, I guess. My home was a horrible place where every day was a fight for survival if one wasn’t employed by a major power.

“There were a few, but honestly they all fought over resources more than anything else. I was lucky to not have to do that crap too often, but no job was permanent or stationary. I’d have to travel with trained soldiers and scavenge for supplies to trade to food to eat, only they got rations regularly.

“There were times I’d be captured by a gang and ransomed off,” he sniffled and looked into the distance beyond time into his past, “sometimes I’d be sold, sometimes I’d run away. There were always fights over who’d have me next and the males would be tame compared to the females when I was picked.”

Sweetie raised her foreleg. “What’s that mean? They sound like they were bullies, were they just picking on ya for being a colt?”

He chuckled and shook his head. “I was an adult, and it wasn’t as tame as being picked on. I don’t know exactly, but I must have a dozen kids back home from what they forced me to do.”

“Kids? Well, if ya think ya were a grown up, what’d they do ta give ya kids? Were ya a foalsitter?”

“Holy shit, you’re so damned innocent, aren’t you?”

They all frowned. “Why do you have to use so many bad words? You know it’s not what nice ponies say,” Scootaloo spoke up.

“Well, being an adult I can say whatever I want. Being a kid just means I have to say them less,” he shrugged and sipped his drink again.

“Well, can ya not use any? Ah mean, yer nice enough, but all that cussin’ ain’t gonna do anythin’ but bring us trouble. Same fer fightin’, callin’ ponies names, and the like.”

“Well, I guess I can cut back, but it’s been part of my vocabulary and verbiage my whole life.”

“Whatever, girls. Let’s take what we can get and he can explain foalsitting for his scavengers, or whatever.”

“It was rape, you fucking twit. You’ve never had a stallion hold you down while another pounds you from behind, it’s worse than an ice cube shoved back there and hurts for days!

“Snickers, yer cussin’ still!”

“Do you listen to anyone before you talk or should you check in for a routine euthanizing?!”

“Woah, Snickers! We just talked about--”

“I’ll schedule you one, you fuckwit, if you keep talking to me like that.”

“Snickers,” Sweetie shouted and her voice cracked getting her to cough a little, “you stop talking like that to our friend or I’ll do something really bad to you!”

He looked away from them and back to his drink, then tossed it into the river. “I don’t care. I’m not saying another word if she’s gonna be here,” he pointed in Scootaloo’s general direction. Scootaloo stood and shouted her dislike of him, running off and leaving them alone.

“You don’t have to be that way, you know.”

He looked at his aunt and pouted. “She doesn’t know what anything is like. She, all of you, this whole fucking place is paradise and I’ve still found the worst parts of it all.”

Sweetie scooted closer to him and placed her forehooves between her legs on the ground, looking at him. “You know, I know what the things you’re talking about mean. Rape and having kids, and all that.”

“Ah do, too. Ya see, it’s part of schoolin’. When we start goin’ inta estrus in a couple years, we have ta be ready and know the tells. Some stallions, they ain’t gonna take it kindly if we refuse ‘em, so we gotta know what ta say.”

Sweetie nodded. “If any pony calls rape, every pony nearby is gonna come running to stop it. It’s a word everypony knows, because it’s the worst thing one pony can do to another. Force a foal onto a filly or mare isn’t okay.”

“Exactly, so whoever did that stuff to ya back home, they’d get stomped and bucked if they’d been caught and probably spend years in the dungeons.”

“Or get gelded and put to hard labor,” Sweetie added in nervously. “It’s a horrible thing to think about, since everything colts and stallions have had to go through since the day of a Thousand Sorrows, but some males can’t be reasoned with.”

“What’s that day you keep talking about? I’ve never heard of it.”

“Oh… Apple Bloom, do you wanna tell him?” The filly shook her head. “Okay, well… I’m not okay telling the story because I don’t know it good enough, but maybe Miss Cherilee can tell you someday.”

“Oh, or Granny Smith! She knows just about everything about everything,” Apple Bloom said proudly.

“Well, how about we show him the clubhouse before anything else. Maybe,” Sweetie Belle stood and looked at Snickers, “somepony’s can exchange apologies and start fresh?”

He snorted and stood up, his emotions conveying regret. “I guess I can. I have to get my anger under control, I know that. Maybe I can get some drugs to help me balance out.”

Apple Bloom nickered. “No way, we’ll find a way ta help ya, but ya ain’t gettin’ any drugs if Ah have anythin’ ta say about it.”

“Sure, like you’re gonna stop me,” he smiled and challenged her.

“Ah think Ah can, all Ah have ta do is tattle on ya and Granny’ll have a posse get ya to the hospital in no time.”

He shuddered. “How about I just keep my nose clean and blood pure on this one?”

“Now that, is a plan I like.”

“Me, too, Sweetie. Race ya to the clubhouse?”

“On three,” Sweetie looked back to make sure he was going to run with them. “One, two…” she dashed off ahead of them and they shouted ‘cheater’, following as closely as they could.

Clubhouse

The group sans Scootaloo reached the ramp and stopped, catching their breath with a jug of water they kept outside for just that reason, drinking it by taking turns they got enough to sate their thirst while their breath calmed and their hearts slowed. “Ah see Scoots made it, so ya ready ta say yer sorry?”

“How do you know she’s here? She could be back at her home or something crying under her bed cuz I’m,” he sighed and shook his head, “I’m just mean to her and I shouldn’t be; regardless of how I feel.”

Sweetie placed a hoof on his side. “It’s okay, we’re a team and no matter what we’re family, too. As long as you don’t go all crazy again, you’ll be fine and we’ll support you.”

“Heh, crazy. You have no idea what that means,” he gave a sardonic smile and looked at the closed door. “Well, I’m not getting any younger,” he looked at his foreleg, “again. Let’s do this.” He took the lead and the girls followed closely until he reached the door. “Do I just go in, or what?”

Apple Bloom opened the door and they peeked in to see Scootaloo wrapped in a length of cloth, struggling to get out of it. Paint and brushes lay on the floor matching his coat and mane colors. “Scootaloo, what in tarnation are ya doin’?” Apple Bloom asked when they walked in, she and her fellow crusader helping the filly to unwrap herself.

“I was hanging a banner I made… but,” she looked at herself and pouted, “I tripped off the stool and tried to catch myself on the banner and it came down and then I got all wrapped up. Thanks, girls,” she said looking at the banner they were holding open and looking at. “Awe, darn… I’m sorry, Snickers, it’s supposed to say ‘Welcome to the Club’, but the paint got a smeared.

“It’s supposed to be a joke about being in our club, our clubhouse, and the first male CMC, but I messed it all up.”

“No, no! It’s fine, Scootaloo… I’m sorry, too,” Snickers pawed at the floor and couldn’t look at her, ears down and his posture slumping. “I was just mad, when I was grown up I went through a lot and yelling and cussin’,” he glanced aside to Apple Bloom, “was how I always talked to everyone.

“I didn’t mean what I said, well, not all of it… I didn’t want you there when I was talking near the end because I felt like I’d make it worse and blame you. Can we forgive each other?”

He looked up into the grinning face of Scootaloo. “Why would you think I’d stay mad at you? You’re our nephew, we can’t be mad at you for that long!”

“Wait, all of you?” he looked at the fillies standing side by side.

“Eeyup. We’re not sisters by blood, but we’re sisters none the less. Yer one of us now, Snickers!”

“Wait! First we have to swear him in, you know the rules.”

He narrowed his eyes at Scootaloo. “You said I can’t swear, but you’re gonna?”

They fillies laughed at him. “No, silly. We’re gonna induce… instruct…” Sweetie tried for the word.

“Induct?”

“Yeah, that! Thanks, Apple Bloom. We’re gonna do that to make you a part of us. C’mon, Scootaloo! Let’s get the scroll.”

...

“That was the longest list of terms for acquaintance I’ve ever heard. Did you just open a thesaurus and go to town copying it?”

“It was Scootaloo that wrote it, ask her.”

“Hey! I wanted to be thorough. There’s no reason to skip on a way to say friend when it’s the most important part of what we represent. Second is getting a cutie mark!”

The four moved together and clacked hooves. “Cutie Mark Crusaders, forever!”

He laughed with them, delighted in the innocence of the moment. A loud series of knocks startled them. “Who the hay could that be?”

“I dunno, check it out, Apple Bloom.”

Apple Bloom looked at Scootaloo with frustration. “Ya know, all the times ya tell me ta do stuff, ya could just do it and not tell me.”

“Or, by the time you get done talking to me you could have done it already.”

“Says you!”

The door opened and an explosion rocked the room, confetti and streamers covering the room. Pinkie hopped over Snickers and set a cake on the table against the wall. “Okay, so I have a lot to apologize for and I’m gonna do it the right way! I talked with Gummy and he helped me see the error of my ways. First, no more ice to wake a pony up, ever again. Next,” she looked at the colt, backing out of the door. He turned and tried to run, getting picked up carried back in and placed onto a chair with a conical hat on his head. “Next, I have a gift for you, Snickers,” she held a plain white box for him.

Hesitantly with trembling legs, he reached for it and brought it to his lap, then flipped the lid open, flinching like a bomb was about to go off. He looked at a small booklet and then to Pinkie. “It’s a Pinkie Pie Promise Pocket Packet, patent pending. There are five cards that let you do one of the things on each of them.

“You can even use the last one for anything you want and I’ll do it no matter what, as long as it doesn’t hurt anypony, make anypony sad, or violate Turning Test’s three laws of automations and golems. Let’s see, law one is--”

“I know the laws, Pinkie,” he said sternly and picked up the booklet. He opened to the first page. “One free party for anything you choose,” he looked at the next. “One free back rub?”

“Or scratch, or wash, or you can switch it up and use it on me! I give great rides,” she beamed.

“I don’t doubt that,” he looked at her cutie mark and she Pinkie blushed. “Let’s see, one hour with Auntie Pinkie Pie?” He looked at Sweetie.

“Nope! She’s not really your aunt, it’s just a name she uses.”

“Yeah, who better to help you with a problem than the aunt you love bestest?! I’ll be there for you whenever you need me as soon as I get the card. The hour part is more of a guideline than a rule.”

“Okay… lastly, one wire diagram? What the hay’s that mean?”

“You’ll know when you need it, that one is conditional. Maybe you won’t need it, I don’t know, really. It’s just something Gummy told me to put in. And the last one is all yours! Anything you want… but you should save it. I think you might need it someday, and it’ll mean more that way.”

He put the booklet in the box and thanked her. “So, do I have to use the first one to eat some cake?” he asked. Pinkied pulled a very sharp knife from seemingly no where and in a single motion cut a piece out, slid it onto a plate that wasn’t there when he’d looked away, and then she pressed the plate into his chest.

“No way! First party’s free, I brought a friend and I hope you’ll get along,” Pinkie said looking at the door. She giggled and looked up. “Gummy, how’d you get up there?” she took the alligator from her head and nuzzled him. “This’ Gummy, he’s a great listener.”

She put him on the table next to a small slice of cake that Snickers noted couldn’t have been there a second ago since he was watching Pinkie… who didn’t have an alligator on her head or body at all when she gave him his cake.

He looked at her with disdain at how she defied logic, relaxing when Sweetie poked his side. “Don’t ask about her, just enjoy the party. You’ll go crazy if you try to figure out how she does stuff.”

“I can imagine,” he said and took a bite of cake. His moan got everyone’s attention, alligator included. “Oh, howy fthit muw,” he said spitting crumbs. He got to all fours and put the plate on the floor, taking bites until his cheeks bulged. He looked at Pinkie with unbridled joy and mumbled words through his full mouth, chewing as he went.

The room was filled with jovial laughter and music started to play from the back of the room. “I know, isn’t it the best cake you’ve ever had? I made it with all the freshest and bestest ingredients just for you, Snickers. It’s my way of saying the party is called the ‘I’m sorry for scaring you and then sticking an ice cube up your butt because it wasn’t as funny as I thought it was gonna be and I felt really bad and cried for a little while but then--”

“Pinkie,” he said feeling giddy and grinning at her with cake in his teeth, “I forgive you. That’s the best cake I’ve ever had in my life and as long as you don’t show me your teeth when you smile for a while, I think I can be your friend, too.”

He hugged her and the fillies, who’d just started to dance, stopped and aww’ed at the scene. Pinkie was about to bounce around the room in happiness, but held back. “Thanks, Snickers. I can’t wait to introduce you to the other foals around town!”

“Uh, not yet. First cake, then I gotta get home. Rarity’s gonna bitch me out, I bet,” he let Pinkie go and noticed a new slice of cake on the plate, Gummy holding the handle of the knife in his mouth to the colt’s surprise. He took the cake slice and backed away, noticing the plate he’d eaten off before was gone and his cake was on a new clean plate.

“Now, that’s the last straw, Snickers,” Sweetie went to him and poked him with her hoof. “You, young colt, are getting a swear jar. Everytime you say a bad word, you put in a bit or have to do a chore for your auntie.”

“Fine, I can get used to that. I should swear less, anyway; not very nice of me to do it, is it?”

“Nope,” the room chorused and laughed again, breaking apart.

So, we’ve got fillies dancing like nopony was watching, me gobbling cake like a Prench prostitute earns her rent, and a mare that’s bouncing around the room like cocaine was part of a healthy breakfast. Snickers giggled to himself. I can get used to this.

Returning Home

Author's Note

Returning home: In which Snickers goes back to the place he came from and the story ends abruptly leaving no resolution, dozens of unanswered questions, and hundreds of unhappy readers!

Oh, wait... that's just the title of the chapter. My bad!

Read on. :trollestia:

Returning Home

The sun was nearing the mountains and the CMC were finally walking back into town after saying goodbye to Apple Bloom, promising to meet her family the next day. Pinkie promised to clean up after the hour long party and with energy to burn, the CMC played around the clubhouse until supper was called for the Apple clan.

“Well, nephew, what’d you think of your first day in Ponyville?” He glanced at Sweetie and grumbled. “What was that?”

“I said until I left Rarity’s, it was sucky.”

“Hey, my sister…” she stopped when he held a hoof to stop her.

“You and the other CMC are the best thing to happen to me in a long time, and that means more to me than I can say. I’ve been a jerk off, but you’ve been so kind and you’ve cared about me more today than I’ve gotten in the last few years with nothing in trade.” He flinched and looked to his left and right at the fillies that had pressed their sides to his. His cheeks warmed when they nuzzled his neck at the same time and he really wanted to make sure his skirt, if it could be called that, was forward enough; just in case.

“You’re so sweet, Snickers! Why can’t you always be this way?” Sweetie asked and Scootaloo stepped away.

“You do like him, don’t you?” she teased and got a raspberry from them both. “Oh, here’s my house! I’ll see you later, and Sweetie,” she pointed at the colt, “get that jar set up quick, I can use a new scooter!” She laughed and ran into a nice looking house.

“Why’s everypony got a house and I gotta live in a purple covered cage?”

“It’s not just you, Rarity’s my sister and I have to stay with her a lot. I just don’t actually stay there enough to really think about it.”

“Oh, I guess that makes sense. Since I met you and we left, I haven’t even thought of that place. I guess it’s home now. Weird to think about, ya know?”

“What, Rarity’s boutique being your home?”

“Home at all. I can see you don’t really believe me when I say I was a grown up, but home wasn’t a thing; it was an idea. Something almost everypony wanted and reached for, but always knew it was out of reach.

“Sure, we’d build towns or try to hide away and make a life with those we had. Home on the road… but statistically a family was safest as a couple of adults with no kids or family with them. Most of the time they’d be the only ones left from their family’s, others got split up and would never see each other again. Towns made of scrap still burn, cities made from metal weigh on ponies’ backs being bigger targets for better supplies,” he looked at Sweetie and she was watching her legs move, listening to him. “For me, and a bunch of survivors, we were special and got lucky. We learned science and engineering, we were going to help build a better future.

“Then we were attacked from within, scattered to the wastes we weren’t ready for,” he looked up and saw the purple monstrousity. “I guess you get what I’m saying, right?”

“Yeah, it’s just so sad… where you’re from, can’t anything be done to make it better?”

He smirked and looked around the town. “I hope that’s the reason I’m here. There’s a saying about a butterfly’s wings--”

“Snickers, darling! There you are,” he was lifted in blue magic and brought quickly into Rarity’s embrace against his will. “I have so much to talk to you about,” he struggled and pressed his forehooves against her neck, “I’ve made you an outfit that you’ll just adore!”

“Get off me you clingy cunt!”

“Snickers!” Sweetie shouted and looked around at the last lingering ponies nearby that gaped at the scene.

“No, it’s fine, Sweetie. He’s perfectly within his rights. Snickers,” Rarity set him down and kneeled as though she were bowing to him, “I truly apologize for marehandling you like that. I hope you can forgive me, I was out of line.”

He looked at her and when she lowered her head in supplicance, showing her horn in the most submissive way a unicorn could, he prepared himself to smack her magical appendage, but stopped himself before he could raise his hoof. He took a step back and looked at her, realizing she was actually apologizing using proper technique.

He looked to Sweetie who was slack jawed, eyes on her sister. He looked back at his new mother and shook his head slightly, then turned and ran past her and into the house.

Rarity stood and watched him go, puzzled until her sister spoke up. “Rarity, did you really just do that? Offer your base to him?”

“Well,” she tapped her horn and hummed, “I’ll be honest, I cast a numbing spell on my horn just in case, but yes,” she said with curiosity, “but I truly expected him to attack me and send me sprawling like a drunkard when I exposed myself to him,” she smiled at her sister. “What have you done to fix his reactions so quickly? You must tell me everything,” she started toward the door and looked back to see her sister pawing at the ground.

“Oh, darling… don’t fret. I purchased more sweets and chocolate powder to make up for earlier.”

“Rarity, I have some stuff to tell you about today… when we were with Snickers.”

...

Snickers ran into his room and looked under the bed, then in the closet, finally he climbed on his bed and looked around. He saw a notebook on the book shelf with a pencil atop it. He hopped to the floor and climbed the shelf, knocked the writing equipment down and finally lay on the floor with the pencil in his lips, tongue against the eraser, and the first lined page was ready.

He started writing, the pencil scratching along the lines again and again until before he knew it a whole page was filled. The next page he started to draw, writing and drawing lines between what he wrote and the very exact images he created as fast as his mouth would allow. He heard quiet speaking, which he realized was normal speaking but at a distance.

It was his family. He dropped the pencil and it made a line through a drawing he’d made, a drop of drool joining it right after. Family. He thought the word over and over in his head. He had a family; it sucked, he was technicaly an only child, his ‘mother’ was a bitch… but it was real in every aspect of the word.

Something he’d lost years ago, and now had a chance with from the beginning. His new life and future were unwritten; he looked at the outer ring of a collar made from metal he’d drawn and then to the door. The melodic voices carrying into his room shoved the raw hatred from his heart and, for just this once, he’d give them a chance.

He looked at the page he’d written on and used a heavy hoof to rip the page out. He ate it in three bites, then looked at the diagram and frowned. “What is wrong with me?” he read the word at the top and several terrible memories ran through his mind. “What would I even consider making one, much less using it on these ponies?”

He closed his eyes and raised his snout, inhaling deeply and exhaling, trying to clear his mind and chest from the anger he carried. Something some old nag once taught him and it seemed to work.

“What’s a ‘bomb collar’?” Sweetie asked from behind him. He freaked out and scraped a hoof across the page, tearing it and several others, shredding them as he worked to erase the evil he’d started to create. He didn’t know he’d been chewing the pages until Rarity shouted his name and brought him back to the moment.

He looked at Rarity and her horn, glowing and keeping him aloft. He looked at the shredded papers around him and then he spat a semi chewed wad of papers on the floor, covering his mouth and whining quietly. Rarity stood over her sister and glared askance at him, but she put him down to focus on her sister’s cheek.

He stood and ran to Sweetie, sliding the last little way and crawling to grab her foreleg with tears brimming in his eyes. “I’m so sorry! I don’t know what happened, I didn’t mean it, please don’t kick me out…” he looked up to Rarity and practically pleaded with her. “Please, just let me have tonight, I’ll do anything to stay here.

“Please,” he pressed Sweetie’s hoof to the bridge of his muzzle and whimpered, almost crying again for the sixth time that day. “Please, I don’t wanna be out there again. I won’t make it, I won’t…”

Rarity and Sweetie hugged him between them and Sweetie cried, both from the emotion of the moment and the sting from the cut along her cheekbone he’d accidentally given her. “Snickers, if Rarity sends you away, I’m going with you,” she said sternly.

“Guh-uh-what?! I’d do no such thing! Snickers,” she moved back and lay on her belly to see at their level, “I swear to you on everything that means anything to me two things, my dear. One, I will never, never abandon you or make you suffer. Do you understand that?”

He nodded, realizing he was hugging Sweetie on his own accord and liking it. “And… number two?”

“The bathroom’s that way, dear,” she pointed with a hoof, then grinned just before he did. Sweetie snerked right after and they giggled and laughed for a few seconds. “Seriously, though… I want to have fun with you, as I do anypony that I know. But number two is by far the most important and serious thing, nay, rule I have of anypony that lives with me, regardless of where that may be or whom that creature is.”

He smiled at her, expecting something silly now. “What’s that? Nightly baths?” he rolled his eyes.

“No, that’s a given. What you must know, is that you will leave this house, every time, looking,” she stood and flounced her mane, singing the next word as though it were part of an opera. “Fabulous!”

Bathtime

The sun had set, Snickers had cleaned his papers up, and now he sat on the floor beside the bookcase with his eyes closed, enjoying a moment to contemplate his recent choice of designing neckware.

What the hell was I thinking? I might have started the ball rolling on bomb collars by just letting that filly see what I’d drawn. Why the hell did I write what it was at the top of the page? How stupid can I be in a single day? Don’t answer that, brain.

“Snickers?” Sweetie asked from outside the doorway. He looked at her and his ear flicked in a way ponies used to ask another to continue. “Um, the bath’s ready, so you’ve gotta take one now. Afterwards we can play in my room, Rarity said the door has to stay open, though. I asked her why and she just told me, ‘because I said so.’ Sisters,” she huffed.

He got up and stretched his left hind leg. “Alright, I’ll be there in a minute. I’ve gotta, um, you know,” he looked askance and she cocked her head.

“Oh, ya gotta pee? No prob, toilet’s in the bathroom by the bathtub!” She turned and he saw her tail sway when she practically pranced away.

“Yeah, that… alright, time to scrub some scum off my nuts,” he took a step and smiled. “I haven’t been this clean and healthy in years, no scum is good scum.” He made his way into the bathroom and looked around, the tub was large and oval standing off the floor with six little feet so in certain climates logs could be put under it to heat the water.

He closed the door, and went to the squat toilet. He looked at it and smiled. “Something so simple makes all the difference in the world." He reached back and bit the skirt he’d made, tossing it aside like the rag it was and stood over the porcelain, letting his bladder relieve itself.

“Snickers! Hurry up and come in,” Sweetie said happily, scaring the colt into a panicked run head first into the wall, knocking several bottles of shampoo and a plastic yellow duckie to the floor. “Ouch, are you okay?”

He whined and rubbed his head, he whined at the pain in his tail he’d landed on, his head from hitting the wall, and his dignity from being seen peeing so casually. “I think I am,” he stood and his legs trembled. “What’re you doing in my bath? Why’d you have to scare me, there’s pee on the floor! Oh no, Rarity’s gonna kill me and flay my hide!”

“Ew! Gross, why would you even say that, Snickers?” Sweetie stuck her tongue out and leaned out of the water, forelegs dangling from the tub. He reached for a towel and dropped it on what he’d missed and leaned onto it to soak it up before tossing the towel aside. “Ya know, it’s not that bad. Fillies make a mess a lot cuz when we gotta go,” she scooped some bubbles in her hoof and blew them away to land on the floor, “we sometimes gotta go and can’t make it all the way.

“It really sucks, but nature sucks. Otherwise we’d have our cutie marks and start being adults, right?”

He looked at her and shook his head. “I mentioned it hours ago, but there’re so many more important things than a butt mark.”

“Whatever, hurry and get in, I need my back washed and can’t reach.”

He watched her slide back casually and vanish into the bubbles. “You know, too much soap can lead to a UTI in mares, right?” he said to no one.

“True,” Rarity said startling him and he almost lost his footing, barely avoiding a slip, “but medicine and magic cure that right up before it’s an issue. Now, in you go,” she lifted him with her magic and dropped him into the water beside her sister.

The water tingled and stung his skin for an instant, then under the water he felt completely relaxed, enough to finish what little he had left of what he’d started before being terrified into a wall. He surfaced and tittered in a girly way. “I haven’t had a hot bath in so long,” he giggled at the heat surrounding him.

“Yes, well, I’ll help you both clean up and then you may play for twenty minutes. No more or your hooves with get soft and you’ll slip across the floor.”

Sweetie was lifted in her sisters magic to the edge of the tub with her belly and legs in the water as a loofah glowing with a blue aura brushed her coat. “Yeah, that’s because I stayed in for an hour once and slipped and got a bloody nose. It was so cool!”

“For you, perhaps. For me it was an effort in futility when I tried to clean it from the towel. I had to throw it away and I liked that towel.”

“Cold water,” Snickers said picking bubbles up with his snout. “Gets the blood out with a little scrubbing, easy peasy, blood’s so easy!” He sneezed and scattered bubbles across the tub. He laughed and reached both legs out to gather a bunch and bite at them.

“Thank you for the insight, but you really shouldn’t eat the bubbles, darling.”

He coughed and started laughing while coughing. “Heh, soapy,” he spat into the tub getting gross looks from the girls, “but tastes like berries! Oh, yum… so much trouble with this choice,” he looked at the suds and then to the others, conceding defeat. “Okay, no bubbles for a snack.” He splashed water at them and ducked under when Rarity scolded him, her voice nothing but high pitched mumbles.

He surfaced again and heard the tail end of Sweetie giggling. “Rarity, be gentle! I’m a filly of high society and shan’t be scrubbed like some common ruffian.”

Rarity snickered at her sister. “Yes, quite. Now that she’d cleaned up it’s your turn, young stallion. Then it’s your task to clean your manes, I’ll be just outside the door reading a magazine while you have your fun as you do.”

Rarity pulled him to the same spot she’d had Sweetie and trembled when the scrubbing started. “Snickers, you must relax or you’ll get a cramp. Hot water cures many an ailment, but you don’t want to ruin your experience by giving Sweetie an unfair advantage, do you?”

He looked at the filly wearing a hat and moustache made of bubbles. “Yeah, right. I don’t buy it.” The scrubbing moved to his underbelly and he quickly felt his body responding. He squirmed futilie in her magic as she unknowingly went around his elongated member that was not used to the heat of a hot bath, making it even harder.

The loofah went against his little nuggets and he yelped, flailing his legs and he was dropped into the water with a large splash. He surfaced and was blushing fircely. Rarity apologized. “I’m so sorry, I was distracted and washed you as I’d washed only fillies, I hadn’t thought of your different parts,” she bit her lip and tinted a light pink in embarrassment.

He shook his head and held a hoof out to her. “I’ll take care of those areas,” he said and when the loofah was placed on his hoof it sank under the water. Rarity averted her attention to a broken bottle of shampoo that’d leaked into the toilet while Sweetie wasn’t anywhere to be seen. He scrubbed everything that was exposed and then very hesitantly held the loofah towards his foster mother.

She took it and moved it to the sink very quickly. “Yes, well, shampoo… I’ll just,” she lit her horn and a bottle of lavender shampoo floated to him while a strawberry scented one waited for Sweetie to surface. Snickers turned around in the tub, staying low so he’d keep himself hidden until it went back in, then felt the most embarrassed and shame in his life.

He felt himself, his fifth leg, strike something that wasn’t him under the water. Sweetie surfaced and held a hoof to her cheek. “What’s with you slapping me on my face, Snickers?” she asked with a pout, bottom lip out. She looked at him, then to her sister who was now pink from her neck to her ears.

Snickers crossed his forelegs under the water, holding it to his body as it finally receded, just after ruining his life like his mom said it would someday. He sank in the water, Rarity gave both shampoo to Sweetie Belle, then stepped back. “Sweetie, have fun playing and don’t do anything inappropriate.”

She backed out of the bathroom and once around the corner she broke and laughter filled the boutique. “What’s she laughing at?” Sweetie asked with her innocence on full display. Snickers blew bubbles under water and Sweetie looked at him in shock. "Did you toot? Gross,” she backed away and lifted a wad of suds in her hoof. “I shall defeat you, stinky monster, and you’ll never trouble my snout again!”

She launched the bubbles with a ferocity of the ages right at the stunned colt. If it were a different scenario he’d certainly have his life flash before his eyes as the end approached. This time, though, the suds scattered across Sweetie’s mane and barely made it past her outstretched leg.

“Darn, misfire,” she fake pouted again getting a laugh from Snickers. Rarity’s laughter had died down and he looked at his aunt with narrowed eyes. “Wait! Manes and tails first, then I show you the error of your ways,” Sweetie exclaimed, tossing him the red bottle and holding a hoof to her lips.

He nodded and started washing his mane, dipped under water again, and reached for his tail. He growled as it just eluded his bite and lips because the water went through and around the hair in a way he wasn’t used to at all. He heard Sweetie holding a laugh behind a hoof and glared at her. “What’s so funny?”

“You look like a dizzy dog doing that,” she moved closer to him and grabbed his tail by the root and pulled with both hooves in a way that sent chills up his back. “This’ why we don’t bathe alone, we’d never get the hard to reach spots. I’ll do your tail, then you do mine, okay?”

He gasped when she tugged again, but managed a nod. It wasn’t a sexual feeling he was having, per se, but it was akin to stretching a foreleg he didn’t know was stiff. Sweetie was expertly tugging and working with his tail’s natural movements to clean it and tug just right. “Apple Bloom has a tail like yours, you know,” she started.

“Only it gets really matted and tangled and yours doesn’t. It’s probably from chores on the farm, but it could be from our adventuring, too. Anyway, she gets really stressed and carries it in her tail, so when we take a bath we take turns doing each other’s tails and giving them tugs or twists to loosed them up.”

“Loosen, Sweetie Belle,” Rarity called from the hallway.

“Everypony’s a dictionary,” Sweetie grumbled. “So, yeah! Now, I know you’ve never done it before, so you don’t have to bother. I’ll be fine without a tail tug until the next time I’m with the other crusaders. We can teach you! It’ll be so much fun, maybe we’ll get our marks in tail massage, or tail tugging, or... washing?” she shook her head. “Nah, I’ll pass on that one.”

He dipped under the water again and ran his hooves through his mane, making sure to clean it the best he could. Once back up he looked back and saw Sweetie nod, then pass the bottle of shampoo to him, the picture of a plant he didn’t know, same for the scent. He poured a small dollop onto her lower back getting a squeak and comment about the frigidness, then he let the bottle float in the water while his hooves tried to reach through her tail hairs to the tail itself. He managed to bump against it, brush the edge of his hooves against it, and twice he caught it, only for it to slip away.

Sweetie’s giggling got his attention and she was looking back at him intensively. He gasped and then splashed water at her. “You… booger!” he, proud he covered his swearing for the first time in his life. “You’re just teasing me, aren’t you?”

“Maaaaybe,” she replied and quickly lifted her tail out of the water, splashing him when it went up and bringing it down, back into the water with a clap that passed over his head; stinging him like he’d been slapped, because he had been. “That’s for slapping me, twice!”

He leapt at her and she screamed, ducking under the water and swimming under him. She popped back up and sprayed water from her mouth directly into his face when he turned around, then laughed at his expression.

“Oh, it… is… on.”

...

Rarity sat outside the bathroom, listening to them playing and enjoying the moment sitting with her back against the wall and ears aimed at the room itself. She was loathe to admit it to herself, but she was acting exactly like Fluttershy had accused her of since he’d arrived, not like a caring adult at all.

Tomorrow, however, was a new day for her to bond with him and learn of his past from himself, to help him open up, to introduce him to Rainbow Dash, and start working with everypony to help him start a new life free of the horrors and pain he’d already been through. Whether he was truly an adult reverted to a child, or a child with an imagination to cover himself in a blanket of lies to keep himself from the world, she’d be there for him.

A happy scream came from the room and she rocked in a single motion to all four hooves so she could peek around the corner. A smile grew as large as it could on her face seeing them play, and to realize that not only was he acting like a foal his age, but he screamed louder than Sweetie Belle.

It was certainly to be denied, but families exist for moments like the one she was watching.

Her horn glowed and unnoticed by the splashing two, the water on the floor slid quickly to the toilet so it would be less likely to cause a slip.

“Hang on, Snickers, I’ve gotta go pee quick!”

“Ew, not in the bath!” he stuck out his tongue at her and she replied the same.

“You did when you got in! But fillies are better than colts because colts have something on their heads.”

“Oh yeah, what’s that?” he asked in mock anger.

She splashed him with a hoof full of bubbles and water, screaming in laughter when his head was finally covered with suds. She scrambled over the edge and nearly slipped if it weren’t for the rigid padding around the tub to prevent just that. She went to the toilet and Snickers turned away.

Sweetie smiled kindly at the back of his head at the respect he’d given her she felt she should have given him earlier. Her tail swayed aside, for what little it meant being soaked and being in the splash zone, as just so happened to be. She braced herself and started to go, losing her hooves from under her legs and falling with her tail under her into the porcelain with all her weight on it.

The shriek was unlike anything he’d wanted to hear ever again and he spun around to look at her and his heart broke seeing the pain in her face. Rarity came around the corner like a smooth arrow and ran to her sister before he could get out of the tub.

“Sweetie, what happened? Please, talk to me!” Rarity asked in a rushed panic to the still shrieking and crying filly. Snickers arrived and went around Rarity, shoving Sweetie over and dodging a reactive swipe from Rarity as she tried to push him away from attacking her sister.

“Her tail!” he pointed and Rarity looked, bringing her hoof to her mouth. He moved quickly and bit the tip of Sweetie’s tail, jerking it with all his might and getting a clack from her coccyx, where spine met tail.

Sweetie groaned and fell to her side, groaning weakly. “What have you done?! Snickers, did you break her tail more than it was?”

“Shut it ya…” he clenched his jaw as Rarity picked up Sweetie, not breaking her glare on him. “She dislocated it, badly. We have to get her to the hospital, where’s the hospital? Rarity, we have to go, now!” Rarity snapped out of her stupor and put her sister on her back, galloping from the room with Snickers right behind her.

Author's Note

Ouch!

Running Away

Snickers followed Rarity in a dash through town, he didn’t know anyone or where anything was, so he did his best to look at the filly dazedly bouncing on her sisters back ahead of him. His hooves were caked with mud, in fact most of him was far dirtier than he’d been since he arrived in Equestria a few days prior.

His mind raced, going over the events again and again, he slowed and watched Rarity reach the library he’d yet to visit or find out about. The door glowed blue and smashed off its hinges as Rarity screamed a name. He trembled and looked from side to side, then turned and ran away with a heavy weight in his chest.

He ran, he didn’t care where, only that he get away from everypony and take his bad luck with him. Clearing the town he crested a hill and looked back, turning to face the hamlet for the last time.

“Why’re you out alone so late?”

Snickers screamed shortly and looked behind him, then around him seeing no one. A snicker above him got his attention and he balked at the blue pegasus mare hovering over him. “D-dash?”

“Ha, my reputation persuades me,” she polished a forehoof on her chest fluff while posing. “So, who’re you, little buddy,” she crossed her forelegs and hovered lower so she could see his face. “Hey, are you okay?” she landed and ruffled her wings to her sides as she approached him. He staggered back from her as she approached.

He nodded curtly and mumbled to himself while keeping distance from her, but she persisted. “Hey, buddy. Look, you’ve been crying and I totally get that colts do that a whole lot; is that why you’re running around at night?”

“N-no, ma’am… I’m,” he inhaled and exhaled and let her approach him, “I’m running away.” Rainbow’s ears rose and she looked at him with wide eyes. “I’m a walking disaster, I’ve been here one day and I’ve made more trouble than twenty back home…” he turned and started to walk away.

Rainbow hopped once and was in front of him. “Woah, nopony’s that bad. Hey, look, um,” she looked around in thought, “can I carry you to a place I know? It’s not far and I promise you’ll like it.”

He raised an eyebrow, looking her from her eyes to her mark and back. Her wings ruffled. “How far is it?”

“Just over that way a bit,” he pointed, “c’mon, it’ll be the most fun you’ve ever had, flying with me is something every colt and filly begs for, and I’m offering it to you. You’re one of a select few,” she said with a cocky grin.

“Fine, but no to’ooO--” he said and then let it grow into a shout when he realized he was flying like a plane taking off, only much quicker than he was expecting and with significantly less safety equipment. He reached his legs around and felt Rainbow’s, then wrapped his around hers and held on for dear life.

It was a moment he didn’t care about covering his hindquarters, because there was no chance anything was going to happen down there like this. The descent was rapid and sudden, she placed him on his hooves and to his embarrassment he peed a little from the terror. He took a step forward and fell over, still shaking from the adrenaline coursing through his veins.

Rainbow dropped a fruit by his head. “Once you stop shaking, eat up. That helps with coming down from the rush, most foals need it after being around my awesome.”

He glared at her as he got up from the short grass. “It’s probably because you scare the shit out of everypony you do that to!”

“Woah, who the fuck taught you to swear at your age?”

He opened his mouth to snap back, then his brain caught up. “Wait, what?”

“Ha, nice,” she tapped her forehoof on the ground three times. “A guy that knows how a real mare talks! Even though you’re kinda small, are you a small stallion, or a snarky colt?”

Snickers felt himself smiling. “I’m Snickers, there’s no real difference.”

Rainbow looked at him, then fell over laughing. She rolled to her back and kicked her hind legs while holding her barrel with her fore.

“Well, glad to see I can make you laugh, but I’m having a crisis and if you’re not gonna give me some magic pills to make me forget for a while, or a mushroom, then I’m just gonna,” he turned and started to leave in a random direction. Rainbow rolled to her hooves and flapped to fly to him, she blocked him and he looked up to her. “Move.”

“Or what,” she snickered and looked down on him. “What’re you gonna do to make me?”

He brought his foreleg up fast and followed her tail until hoof met flesh. Rainbow’s wings went rigid and she fell to the ground on her side, her forelegs between her thighs at what he’d struck. “Just a little move I call the cunt punt, nice playing. One point to me,” he trotted around her and made it a few paces before a sharp and dull pain struck him through his tail.

His voice hitched in a baby bird like squeak and he fell forward, his tail did nothing to protect himself, but he still used it and his forehooves to cover his tender tenders. Rainbow stood over him a moment later and chuckled with hesitant breaths. “I call that playing pin balls, one for me, jerk face!”

They shared a glower and sneered at one another before chuckling and making a silent pact to not mess around. She lay facing him like Fluttershy had a short few hours ago. “We’re tied, I guess. Nice hit, by the way. I thought you were down, then you hit back without expecting it.”

“I’ve played that a few times when some colt tries to get fresh and thinks I’m ready for a mounting after a drink or ten,” she giggled and bumped his raised forehoof. “I didn’t hurt you too bad, did I?”

He placed his hooves on the ground and pushed himself up, there was an ache that felt like a string was tugging from his balls to his sternum, pulling more taut when he sat tall, so he slouched. “Nah, not only have I had worse, I actually expected it then and it hurt even more that way.”

She grimaced from the dull ache that he’d given her and the thought of what it must have been like on his end back whenever. “That sucks, dude. You gonna be okay? I can, like, take you to the hospital if you’re--”

“No,” he interrupted, “I’m not going there, I put my friend there tonight. That’s why I’m leaving.”

“Leaving, or running away?”

“Is there a freaking difference?” he asked glumly.

“Well, leaving is going away but having stuff ready and saying goodbye. Running away is, like, running away from your problems and hoping they’ll change and you won’t.”

He looked up at her, eyes meeting hers in the raising moonlight. “I thought you were supposed to be dumb and full of yourself. Now I see you’re not as dumb, at least.”

“Hey, thanks! I knew you’d… hey, wait a minute! I’m not… whatever you said.”

He couldn’t help but grin at her, teasingly. “You don’t remember what I said, do you?”

“Well, forgive me for having a throbbing in my tunnel and not feeling good about it!” she shot back. He raised his hooves placatingly. “Whatever, dude. Look, I didn’t bring you here to get my clam cracked open. And you’re too young for me to notice if you did try that other thing you’re thinking about,” she winked at him and he smiled back.

“I really like you, you’re the first real pony I’ve met since I got here. I honestly thought I’d get along with you the least, given your reputation. Well, get on with it, professor.”

She got up and took a couple steps, her hind legs tentative until she was sure it wasn’t going to hurt to move. She walked away a little ways and stopped, waving him over to her. He, on the other hoof, did ache and would for a while. Rainbow at least looked regretful as he approached and sat down by a pool of water.

“This water’s been here for about seven years. I know because I found it when I came here to visit my friend, Fluttershy, when I was three. Before I got to her cottage I crashed right here and my head landed under the water. It was a bad crash when it happened because,” she pointed to a pile of rocks, “that’s where I actually landed.

He looked at the distance and spaced it to about half the length of a hoofball field. He looked at her with doubt.

“Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t a good crash. I broke my wings in six places on my right, dislocating it, and two places on my left. I twisted my right leg almost around, my left was under me but I was told it was bad. I scratched my eye across the ground, split my head and lip, and could have drowned if this water wasn’t special. Go on, take a sip.”

He looked at his reflection in the water and brought his lips down to slurp some, but his lips passed through and he flinched back, looking at her while still leaving over it. She gestured confidently and he looked back at it, then dipped his head in. There was a warm rush of air across his face and he looked down on a city that was shocking to his senses.

He was peeking through a hole in the sky down on a city of metal and stone that rivaled most of Equestria’s major cities combined in size. From horizon to horizon the city sprawled and lived. Vehicles traveled from one end of the city to another in lines like ants after some food. He was pulled back and set on the ground beside Rainbow.

“See that?” she pointed to the portal, “it’s a magical portal to the future!”

He looked up at her. “How do you know? It could be another world or something.”

“How do you think I got fixed up?” she opened her wings and turned to him, letting him get close. “Go on, touch my arm.”

He reached up and poked the bone that ran the length of the outside of her wing. His brow furrowed and he did it again. “It’s not right, there’s a polymer there, I think. But,” he took her wing in both his little hooves and pulled himself to her, looking her wing from front to back. “There’s no incision,” he put his ear against her wing and moved it, “no mechanics or clockwork.”

“Yeah, something called carbon nanofiber holds them together now. At least where they broke. It’s as strong as mythril, light as a feather, and channels magic just like a normal bone would,” she pulled her wing from him.

“Wait, I wanna see more. How’s it connect to the bone, is it actually a replacement? How much did they need to make to,” he gasped and looked back at the portal, “it could be the next step, nay, the next hundred steps in the future of engineering technologies! C’mon, I’ll go through and you follow!”

“Wait up there, little buddy,” she said picking him up and tapping on the surface, a resounding metal clunk was heard. “No can do. Ya see, there’s something about something that means only one of us can go through at a time. Something about displaced matters, or something.”

“Ohh,” he nodded. “Conservation of matter and transferral of matter across distances through the aether’s medium. You went there, so something of equal mass had to come here.”

“Yeah! That, only I fell in and a ton of air got through here. Well, maybe not a ton, but some. That coulda been really dangerous, ya know,” she tapped her chest, “end of the world stuff.”

“Yeah, I know all about that, but maybe they have a way to fix it?”

Rainbow looked aside and to the portal. “You know it’d be pretty tough to get a bunch of stuff through that, not to mention who knows what would be pulled in when they came through for both sides.

“We’re, like, a thousand miles up. What if a filly like Scootaloo got sucked into their world? Not happening.”

“Then, how’d they fix you?”

She shrugged. “However it happened, there had to be something awesome going on. Once they put me in the tube thing I went to sleep and woke up near the portal. They were nice creatures, like those humans in the comics going around, and they told me about the danger of travel between worlds.

“They didn’t give me anything besides a warning that if I came back without world saving reasons that they’d seal the thing off forever.”

“Woah, wait… so you went to another reality and just came back and didn’t go back! What the hell, mare?!”

“Hey, when an alien race tells you not to do something, you do it!” He bit his lip. “And don’t think of going through. They set it up so the thing can only be used once every couple days. You used the pass through thing by sticking your snout where it doesn’t belong,” she booped his nose and giggled when he scrunched it.

“Fine, I’ll leave the awesome alternate reality of the future alone. But if I find my own?” he asked hopefully getting a shake of her head. “Fine! Keep all the fun stuff. Is that all you wanted to do, show me awesomeness and tell me to fuck off?”

“Ha, no. Lemme tell you a little story about myself and that portal,” they sat across from one another, “I was about eight and lost a race. Now I know that it happens, then it was the end of my world. I ran away, like you’re doing, and hopped in. I glided to the city and landed on a street. I was the center of attention and they all looked at me like the most awesome mare I am.

“I was arrested within ten minutes of flying after cars, they called them, short for carts, I guess. I was taken to their jail, in a building higher than Mount Canterhorn. They didn’t talk to me for a while day, making sure I got dry oats, water, and fruit before they took me to a talking room.”

“An interrogation room?”

“No, it was like a shrink’s office. Some guy walks in with two of their guards watching me and starts talking about rules and responsibilty. Then he asked me why I broke the rules and,” she hesitated, but the look of attention she was getting spurred her on, “and I told him and cried about it like a filly.

“He held me in the most comfortable way in his arms I’ve ever been touched and they have these hands that are way better than a minotaur’s. They’re softer and smaller, and he scratched my mane and back until I fell asleep.”

“This isn’t a story where you get laid, is it?”

Rainbow blushed a light purple in her cheeks. “No way! That’s not even funny,” she glared at him for a few seconds, but stopped when his cheeky smile remained. “Okay, well, so, this guy wakes me up and puts me on his couch and we start talking. The guards take turns changing shifts and I keep talking.

“The sun set and I went to sleep on that couch, but when I woke up I went for a walk to my room and did some exercises, then when I went back to the shrink’s office he was there with breakfast that had hay and oatmeal and dried fruits. It was… oh, yeah. Well, he taught me that it’s okay to be scared and to need space away, but that if you run from your problems, they’ll catch up to you.

“I realized he was right, and that if I stayed like I’d thought of doing, how many lives would change because I was gone, but I’d be the same me that lost the race. Would it really be worth changing everyone else so much just to feel better?”

Snickers shook his head.

“Exactly, so I came back and went right to this head doctor I heard of back in Cloudsdale and learned a ton about feelings and how to help other ponies not feel like they’re any less awesome than they really are. And that’s pretty awesome, helping other ponies be awesome.”

He sighed and looked up to the stars. “I just… feel so bad about what happened. You said you’re friends with Fluttershy?”

“Yeah, we go way back.”

“I met her today and she’s totally cool. We had a serious talk about how I feel about stuff and what I can do to make it better. Honestly, I don’t think Rarity’s a good mom.”

Rainbow hopped back and covered her mouth. “Oh my gosh, I just heard about you from Fluttershy! What’re you doing out here, why’re you running away, seriously? You didn’t hurt her, did you?” she asked, harassing his personal space.

“I put Sweetie in the Hospital, alright? There,” he said standing and lookin down her muzzle into her eyes. “I just ruined her life because I’m bad luck and I have to leave before I hurt another friend.”

Rainbow backed down first. “Look, I get it. But, what if she’s okay and you run away. She’ll spend the rest of her life thinking you ran away because you hurt her, not because you hurt her. Given your track record the past couple days, which do you think she’d think?”

He took a step back and lowered his head. “I guess she's think that I hurt her and ran away because I was mean, and not that it was an accident.”

“Exactly, and I’m a mare; I know that I’d have trouble trusting any colt after something like that happened. It can take years to get over some pain, longer than an injury. What happened to her that got you so riled up?”

He kicked the soil and grass again. “I spilled shampoo into the toilet and she slipped and broke her tail.”

Rainbow flinched. “Ouch.”

“Yeah, that’s why I can’t go back. It’s too much, what if she hates me?”

Rainbow rolled her eyes and placed both forehooves on his shoulders. “Look, no matter what happens, remember that I know she’d never hate you unless you did it on purpose. And even then, it’d have to be something pretty bad to get her that angry. I know her and her friends; they’re cool as long as you are. Just go see her, it’s worth it so you don’t feel as bad in the future.”

He sighed and nodded. “Which way do I go?” She flew around him and picked him up, taking him in a much more relaxed way on the pathway directly into the hospital. He started trotting off and she caught up. “What?”

“Good luck and be yourself. I’ll be along in an hour, I’ve gotta make sure Twilight knows about this and then we can get Pinkie Pie over here too. Hey, I didn’t break your brain, did I? Cuz this’ the perfect place for that to happen.”

They’re all friends. They’re all here, and they know one another. I didn’t expect this, and now I have to adapt to a situation I wasn’t aware of. At least two of them are awesome, Pinkie is… those eyes, he shuddered, and Rarity’s my mother figure. That leaves Twilight; the enigma. I can only hope she isn’t crazy. That’d hit to close to home.

Hospital

“Fuck tard.”

“Hm,” Snickers thought, “walking sperm dumpster.”

Rainbow barely held back a laugh. “Oh, it’s that way, huh?” she landed beside him as they entered the town’s main street. “Penis licker.”

“Pussy pounder.”

"Teat nibbler."

"Plot huffer."

"If I drop a chair, do you get confused which leg goes in what hole?" Snickers asked seriously, getting a flat look back from Rainbow.

"Lame. Are you hungry, dude? Because you know what they say; you are what you eat,” Rainbow said casually, “that’s why you’re a huge dick.”

Snickers lost his resolve and fell forward laughed loudly. Rainbow pumped her hoof in victory. “I knew I’d win, it’s in my dinnuh.” Snickers’ laughter grew louder and he started coughing, rolling side to side as tears streaked his cheeks. Rainbow felt her pride and ego falter. “It’s not that funny.”

He forced himself to stop, looked at her upside down, then burst into another giggle fit. “Dinnuh!” he kicked his legs and screamed. “Dinnuh dick!” he rolled to his belly and covered his eyes, that was when he snorted like a piglet and stopped for an instant before his laughter resumed.

“Okay, I won, you don’t have to remind me. If you don’t stop I’ll have to carry you. We need to check Sweetie Belle.” Her statement fell on deaf ears and she finally nosed under him and rolled him onto her back, cantering through town. “Don’t mind us, he’s got the giggles,” Rainbow said to a mare watching them pass from her window.

"Ah dinnuh eat dick, ya doop," he almost rolled off Rainbow, who had to use her wings to hold him on a she blushed from carrying the center of attention, not being it.

“Hey, can’t talk now, crazy colt’s going to the hospital. They have a cure for giggle-itis, I heard. Miss Cheerilee, meet your new pupil… well, maybe later. Nice to see you, dinner with the gals Thursday, right?”

Rainbow sighed happily when, after their walk was almost complete, he finally passed his peak of laughter and it quickly fell to a chuckled and finally a yawn. “Rainbow, I haven’t laughed like that in… forever.”

“Well, be careful of what you eat and that won’t be a problem.”

He chuckled, but with a strong effort of will, held it back. He was within view of the hospital and wondered why there was such a large, multistoried, clearly expensive professional hospital on the far outskirts of town? They quickly reached the waiting room and Rainbow ran to the desk. “Hey, I gotta friend named Rarity here, where is she?” Rainbow asked hurriedly.

“Name?”

“Are you serious?! I’m Rainbow Dash, how don’t you know me, Nightingale? We went to weather patrol management refresher training together last year.”

The nurse lazily looked up to Rainbow, then the foal on her back. “Relation to the patient?”

Rainbow growled. “I’m her closest friend, let me in or I’ll check every door in this place.”

The mare scratched something on a notepad and looked at the colt. “What’s his medical need tonight?”

Rainbow lowered her back end and Snickers slid off. “He’s fine! Let me spell it out for you. I n-e-e-d to see my friend because her sister is hurt really bad.”

“So you’re not here to see Rarity?”

“No!”

Nightingale moved a hoof up and ripped the page out. “Name?”

Rainbow screamed in frustration and in her moment of distraction he moved around the desk and into the hospital. He listened between his hooves clopping and clicking on the floor for either of their voices, passing a nurse intently reading a chart and a stallion rocking side to side and mumbling to himself. Snickers stayed away from that one. It was after he turned the next corner that he started peeking in rooms with open doors, pressing his ear to closed doors, and trying with little success to read the papers on clipboards; cursing his being short.

He heard frustrated talking and knew the false haughty voice of Rarity. He followed it down two more rooms and opened the door quietly. It was an office, not a medical room. Both adults turned to look at him and Rarity got up. She pulled him into the room with her magic and hugged him tightly.

“Oh, Snickers, where’d you run… euck, you’re filthy, what in Equestria’s darkest night did you do to yourself?”

He turned his eyes to the doctor in a pleading gesture. “Alright, Miss Rarity. Please, let the boy go and we can finish our discussion.”

“Where’s Sweetie, I wanna see her.”

“Oh, darling, she’ll be asleep for the night, at least. It’s so terrible, we’ve all missed supper, but I hope the cafeteria has food.”

“They closed half an hour ago,” the doctor stated and Rarity let Snickers go to turn to him. "They open half an hour after sunrise, though."

“What about you? Do you have anything hiding in,” her eyes looked at the small refrigerator, “that?”

“Certainly not, that’s a medical cooler. I use it to keep medicines chilled and blood samples for testing. Certainly nothing you’d like to eat, I hope.”

Rarity stuck her tongue out. “I’d prefer not to even see blood, much less taste it. In that case, let’s pick up where we left off.”

“Can I at least see her while you talk to him?” Snickers asked again. Rarity nodded and told him what number the room was and he quickly left before she could say anything else. He turned the corners, wondering again why a general hospital built for a major city resided in a small rural town. He found the number and slid to a stop.

He opened the door slowly, thankful for the clean hinges that didn’t squeak. There was a light on across the room, an old mare wearing a hospital uniform asleep on a chair, and Sweetie Belle on her belly on a medical bed, her tail was in the air and wrapped heavily with bandages. He gasped at the sight and backed out of the room, closed the door, and sat with his forehead against the wall.

Regret started to well inside him again, then he heard the quick pace of unshod hooves. “Hey, squirt, finally got past that front desk mare,” she looked at him and sighed. “Another pity party?” He nodded his head and Rainbow sat beside him. "What happened this time? Catch a look in the mirror?" she said in a softer voice.

"She's in there, it's all my fault. I'm such a bad pony."

Rainbow gave him a little shove. She looked down the hall both ways and leaned closer to him. "Shut your mouth." He looked askance at her smile and this time, it was genuine. "I'm gonna peek, okay?" He nodded and she got up, nudged the door open, then slipped inside.

He sighed and turned around, back to the wall. A minute passed, then she slipped out and closed the door with her wingtip. “Wow, broken tail, huh?”

“I can’t believe I let you talk me into coming here,” he said sadly, looking like a sad puppy. Rainbow felt her maternal instincts scream at her to hold this colt in her legs and not let go until he was better. She wouldn’t give in, though, fighting her wings from reaching out to pull him to her.

“Look, it’s not your fault. C’mon, let’s get away from this door and you can tell me what happened; then I can show you how awesome I am when I fly upside down.”

“Ha, pegasi can’t do that.”

“You’ll have to see, won’t you?” she teased him and flew a small circle around him.

“Fine, what happened was this…”

...

Rarity left the doctor’s office and went to check her sister, expecting to see a colt by her bed either upset over what happened or indifferent; instead the room was just as she’d left it an hour before. She gave her sister a once over, made sure her dock was wrapped well, she was sleeping peacefully since comfort didn’t seem like an option, then left quickly to find the colt.

She worried that he’d make more trouble somehow, that is until she reached the waiting room and at one of the benches. She looked at the duo the hospital staff had covered with a thin blanket, Rainbow was holding him closely like he was a stuffed animal and he was tucked into her like a foal would his mother.

If there was ever a time she wanted a camera, this was it.

“Psst,” a nurse waved Rarity over and reached behind a desk for a camera. She leaned in close. “Here, we’ll have it developed, but go,” she emphasised with a smile, “they always move just before the picture’s taken and ruin the moment,” she waved Rarity away this time and the white mare expedited the process.

She readied the camera and when she reached a spot that had them both in frame, she snapped a photo. She moved to another angle and took another, then repeated the process two more times. She nodded in approval of what she hoped she’d accomplished and returned the camera. “Thank you, darling. This means more to all of us than you know.

“I just adopted him, you see, and he found Rainbow after, I presume, he was lost following me to Twilight’s,” Rarity blushed and looked aside. “You see, I had Twilight teleport here with us after I broke into her house… and wasn’t thinking about him because of my sister, you see.”

“It’s fine, Rarity. Everypony’s fine and it seems like they hit it off. I haven’t seen Rainbow Dash in the hospital for such a good reason before now.”

“Oh, really? Well, that’s a relief,” Rarity said with a sigh. “At least there have been brief moment of good through the day. Now, I hope they stay longer; the good that is. Darling, I’m going to head home as my sister is in good hooves. If anything happens please, take this,” she passed a glowing blue gem to the nurse.

“Ah, an emergency gem? These are very expensive, are you sure you want to use one? We can just have a staff member go get you.”

“I make them myself with little more than an hour’s time. If there’s any change, or my sister wakes up and needs me, I’ll be here in half the time it’ll take you to send somepony. As it stands, I have to make some clothes for a capricious colt,” she looked caringly at the duo and said her goodbyes.

Rarity left the hospital and quickly made her way to Twilight’s library, knocking on the door gently. “Yeah, who is it?” Spike called from inside.

“It’s me, Spikey Wikey.” There was a moment of silence before the door was tugged open and Spikes grin turned into a gasp as the door fell on him. It was stopped just before it landed on him by a blue aura. “I’m sorry I entered with such intensity last time, is Twilight back?”

Twilight’s hooves clattered on the stairs. Three books hovered around her head as she approached her visitor. “Rarity, come in. How’s Sweetie? You’ve only been gone half an hour, is she okay?”

Rarity set the door against the frame and followed Twilight to a reading nook. “She’s going to be fine; I’m sure of it. A little crack in her coccyx, if Snickers hadn’t pulled it when he did,” her ears sagged, “then she might not have had use of her tail ever again.” Twilight gasped into her hoof. “But, a couple days of recovery and a brace, she’ll be as good as new.”

“Oh yes, medical technology and spellwork has come a long way over the past hundred years. I was reading in a medical encyclopedia,” a book lowered between them and flipped open to a page Twilight pointed at, “that tail injuries are uncommon, but have to be taken care of immediately or life altering affects can happen.

“Some as soon as ten minutes after the injury. I don’t know anything about the specifics since I’m not a medical doctor, but from what you’ve said and what I saw, she had a dislocation between her--”

Rarity stopped her friend when she noticed Twilight starting her famous lecture mode. “Darling, I’d rather not think of what specifically happened to my darling sister’s anatomy. I’m sure you understand.”

“Oh, right. I’m sorry, Rarity. Spike?!”

A pitter patter of feet heralded his arrival. “Yeah, Twilight? Rarity,” he sighed when he looked at her. Twilight rolled her eyes and gave him three of her books.

“Put these away for me, Spike. I have to talk with Rarity for a little bit about tonight.”

He sighed when he heard her name and turned around on one foot, then staggered away. Both mares sighed and rolled their eyes with a giggle. “Rarity, you really shouldn’t tease him.”

Rarity gasped in shock. “Twilight, I didn’t do anything this time. I merely glanced at him while focusing on my hoof. I can’t help it if he knows true beauty when he’s near me.”

Twilight sighed with a content smile. “Somethings never change, I guess. So, who’s this stallion you keep talking about? Is he new to town or passing through?”

“Oh, neither. I’ve adopted him.” The book fell from Twilight’s magic and bounced off her head into her lap. “Yes, that’s how I thought you’d react.”

“Wh-what? But… I’m sorry, I’m confused. Did you just say what I think you said?”

“Well, what do you think I said?”

“Don’t play coy with me, Rarity,” Twilight said with a sterner tone. “Did you really take a stallion into your house? How do you adopt a stallion, that practice was outlawed by the Trivalley Council in 1564! You can go to jail, Rarity! You didn’t sign anything, did you?!”

“Twilight! Calm down, breathe,” Rarity encouraged her friend to inhale and exhale deeply over the next dozen seconds. “Now, this Snickers is a colt, and I’ve taken him in. He’s a bit of a troubled soul, as it were, but over the past day he’s improved more than I could have hoped.”

“How… do you mean?”

“Do you need a moment to catch your breath?”

“No… just recovering from thinking of losing you,” she gulped and shook her head, “but that’s not gonna happen, so go on! Tell me about him.”

Rarity looked at Twilight with puzzlement. There was something about the mare’s mood swings from borderline insane to cleverly normal that always unnerved her. “Yes, well. I have his file at home in my safe, it’s restricted, you see--”

“That’s alright, as a member of the royal court I have access to anything not Princess tier in security. A foal shouldn’t be more than fourth tier,” she giggled to herself, “and anypony with a house and ten bits on them has third tier. Being an Element of Harmony bearer you’re technically a knight to the crown and have Noble level clearence. Right?

“Rarity? Why’re you looking like that?”

Rarity’s eyes sparkled with help from her inner magic being released without a focal point. “I… am a knight? That means I can have land, and on that land I can build anything I want,” she stated while looking at the curved carved wood arch over them. Her mind danced between ideas of factories, shops, a mansion or two.

Rarity was shoved by the edge of a book held in Twilight’s magic. “Snickers, you were talking about him before I derailed you.”

“Ah, yes,” she cleared her throat, “I’ll spare you the details and I’d prefer to keep his file secret for the time being, if you don’t mind. He’s a troubled youth and needs to socialize to rejoin Equestria as a member of society. He has an active imagination they said, it seemed that all he has is a creative way to swear enough to make a sailor cry.”

“Oh, I’m sure he’s not that bad.”

Rarity leaned in. “He spoke of my mareparts in such a way that if I did what he suggested, I’d be with foal by the end of the week.” Twilight sat back and her cheeks puffed, but she still snerked from her nose. “Twilight! I can’t believe you’d find something so distasteful amusing,” she pouted and looked at her tail, “my poor privates would never be the same if that happened.”

Twilight giggled and shook her head. “Rarity, he’s a colt. He’s gonna go through these phases just like fillies do. I remember when I was a filly, there was this guard that I just,” she looked at the wall and bit her lip.

“Twilight, let’s focus on the now, please. I came here to apologize for damaging your door, if you won’t listen to me talk about the new addition to my household then perhaps I should just take my leave.”

“No, Rarity, please, I wasn’t thinking. C’mon, tell me about him. What’s he like?”

“Well, he’s a colt by any standard of the word. He has a dozen personalitiy quirks, none of which are charming at all. But, he met Fluttershy today and they got along famously. She gave me a talking down to, one I deserved, mind you, then we parted. I didn’t see the colt all day until he came home with Sweetie Belle.

“There was an incident and he accidently struck Sweetie, but she was fine and forgave him when he apologized in a way straight out the novels. Why, if he were six years older and not a member of my house, I’d swoon into his arms and let him carry me to stable.”

Spike was the one to gasp this time. He donned a furious face. “Who is this guy? I’ll burn his tail hairs and shave his back with my claws.”

He brandished his claws and the girls leaned away, the fact he was a predator was easily forgotten until moments like this. Twilight was the one to slowly extend a foreleg to him. He saw her cowering and relaxed as fast as he had overreacted. “Sorry, Rarity. I didn’t mean to scare you. I just heard about some guy i don’t know doing things to you that you really shouldn’t just do with a pony.

“I mean, a pony you just met…” he laughed nervously and backed away, running back to fix the door again.

“That dragon is so yours, Twilight.”

They both sat and relaxed again. “Why? He’s just a bit moody, how’s that like me?”

Rarity looked knowingly at her friend. “Let’s move on, shall we? So, Snickers and Sweetie bathe, everything is going swimmingly, then Sweetie leaves the bath to relieve herself and slips on some shampoo I’d neglected to clean from a harmless spill earlier.The rest you pretty much know.

“Now, I have to go home quickly and sew a nice suit for him, or perhaps a smock of some sort? You see, he has a nudity issue. I don’t mind, in fact I hope for him to be a model to my clothes in the future, only he believes that at least for himself, that showing his reproductive areas is immoral or immodest.”

“Huh, really? I haven’t heard of any cities like that in Equestria, not even Canterlot has that issue. Clothes are little more than accents to show off ones wealth or body, why does he feel that his is a workable action?”

“I haven’t the slightest idea, however I am going to go now and I’ll see you tomorrow sometime to go over some details. I have some errands to run, but once I’m done I’ll give you my full attention. Ta ta.”

Rarity passed Spike, who was working on the door and knew he’d open it for her. Not even a little guilt passed though her when he removed the door from the frame, undoing all his hard work for the third time, and trotted back home.

Once inside, she pulled fabrics and tools as she made her way to the back room where she worked. She donned her red rimmed glasses and brought a bolt of scratch fabric to herself, then began sketching an outfit. “Hm, something sensible. Something cute. Something that flows and feels loose.

“He’s a colt with little care, he certainly likes to swear. I shouldn’t tug his ear, but that colt is gonna have some flair! A little blue and a stripe of green? Bleh, that’s the ugliest thing I’ve ever seen. Yellow and white might seem alright, but it looks like something found in a toilet at night. All the colors of the rainbow are here in my shop, think, Rarity. Don’t you dare stop.

“Aha! I know quite well what will make him shine; turquoise along his back to show his style, gold around his neck to catch the eye. White along his legs since he’s so shy, with a small opening in the place of a fly. His tail will fit without a snare, his legs with glide like silk across his hair.

“He can put it on in ten seconds flat… oh please, don’t tell me I said that.”

Rarity held up one piece and the other, looking at her creation with pride. It was everything she wanted it to be and it conformed to what colts liked to wear. The shirt or pants were able to be worn single, but together they were something she hoped he’d love to wear. “Oh, drat. That musical number took longer than I’d thought.

“I have to get to bed and rest for even a little while. I can’t see Sweetie tipsy on my hooves,” she put the outfit on a dummy and ascended the stairs. Two slitted eyes shone in the night as a creature of darkness looked at his favorite spot to watch for intruders covered with something. Something he didn’t like, because he was a cat. And cats are assholes.

Author's Note

Oh my. I accidently started and decided to finish a song in there. A first for me... Don't hate too hard.

Truth

The sun shined into Rarity’s eyes, waking her unhappily. She reached a hoof and felt her sleep mask askew on her head covering one of her ears. “I must have slept quite rough last night. Oh,” she pouted, “if only I had Mister Ed to help me go to sleep. Where did I send that naughty toy?” she puffed her cheeks and rolled to sit up then slid onto the floor. She made her bed passively, took care of her mane, then went into the bathroom.

An hour or so later the door opened billowing steam around her hooves and the hall expienced its daily fogging, smelling of rose petals and a berry perfume. “And the day can begin. Now, to see my darling sister and give Snickers the outfit I’d made. Let’s see, it’s… Sweet Celestia, it’s ten? Again with that number and again I’m late! Why did I sleep so long?” she hurried down the stairs and grabbed a gift box from one side of the room and the outfit from its perch.

She started to close the box when it hissed and a paw bearing sharpened claws that begged for pony blood swiped at her. “Oh, Opalescence, this is no time to play silly games,” Rarity lowered the cat and grabbed the outfit and boxing it. She pet her cat once and ran out of the shop, closing the door behind her.

Opal, for her part, went to one of Rarity’s horseshoes and moved it under the couch. Because she could.

Rarity burst back into the shop and went to her shoes, slipping one on each hoof until her left hind hoof was left. “What, where’s my… shit!” she covered her mouth and looked around quickly. “That darn colt’s bringing out the worst in me, it seems,” she groused and her horn lit while she looked for her shoe. A tink sounded from across the room as a bit entered a nearly empty jar joining three of its brethren.

Finally, Rarity conceded defeat and opened a dresser she was by and took out a pair of polished platinum shoes. She looked at the doorway and the rough ground outside, she thought of her hooves and how they’d be abused on the graveled streets, then whined to herself as she stomped her hooves one at a time at the specific angle to remove shoes.

She placed the fancy ones under her hooves one at a time and noticed they balanced her much better than her daily ones, but that was the point of not wearing high fashion on daily tasks. She paced herself quickly to the doorway with her usual shoes in tow, then switched them for the box on the floor and left again.

The ground wasn’t even noticable. It felt like walking on a grassy plain in her custom shoes. She’d had them custom made to compress with each hoof fall and practically conform to the street she was on. It was delightful to trot through town and she gave friendly, yet short, greetings all the way to the hospital.

She bounced through the doorway and giggled to herself, landing with a secondary bounce. I’ve never had such a nice walk in this town. My legs actually feel lighter, perhaps I should wear these more often? They’ll certainly help me feel better after running chores.

She reached the intake and first asked about a shower she could run a colt through, after she had her answer she prepared to go around the desk, but was redirected by the nurse smiling and pointing a foreleg.

Rarity followed the direction and while she felt elation, she was also annoyed to see both ponies still asleep pretty close to where she’d left them the night before. She marched over to them and pulled the blanket off, then pulled Snickers from under Rainbow, and laying him on the next pillow; waking him in a groggy stupor.

“What the Tartarus? Who’s shakin’ my bed? Rabble, if that’s you I’ll shove a Tesla coil so far up your ass,” he turned over and curled up. “Okay, Rabble, that’s it. I’m gonna do it,” he snapped turning over and looking up at the frowning mare over him. “Oh, uh, Miss Rarity. So nice to make your acquaintance,” he looked around her sides and at her horn. “You don’t have any soap hiding, do you?”

She shook her head and moved beside him on the bench. “Snickers, I’m very sorry about yesterday. I was out of line and was completely monstrous to you. You have every right to be upset with me, and I won’t try to defend myself of your ire. I won’t tolerate profanity, but you can be upset with me, nonetheless.”

He relaxed and looked at her horn. “What’re you hiding, then? It’s not some kind of bridle so you can keep me close, is it?”

She dismissed his notion with a noise. “Psh, no. You’re far to old and much too unruly to be held by something for disobedient foals. We’re not going to entertain that notion until you’re mature and are experimenting with what sexual desires you have, understand?”

He rolled his eyes. “Been there, I know what gets me going and wearing isn’t as fun as holding the leash.”

“Snickers, I’d once again like to remind you that you needn’t refer to such matters, especially in public. Now, I’ve made you the most wonderful outfit.”

“Wait, clothes?” he asked with hopeful surprise sitting up. He looked down at himself and realized that not only was he filthy with dried mud, grass, sticks, and leaves, but he was also naked and at a single thought ready to expose himself. He covered his sheath with his hooves and blushed.

“Yes, and I’m sure I can use one of the showers here to clean you up, then you can show you new clothes to Sweetie Belle. She’ll love to see you and you are wearing them rather than that rag you were before. Perhaps it’ll be the start of a trend; colts in clothes,” she moved her hooves to indicate signage, “the next step in fashion.”

He smiled awkwardly and looked at Rainbow when the cyan mare snorted and rolled over. He looked back at Rarity and motioned to her. “What about her?” He asked and yawned, stretching his forelegs.

“Oh, I’m certain the staff will take care of her now that she isn’t needed to keep you company.”

He slipped to the floor and his hooves clattered as he balanced himself. He nodded to the nurses that passed him, one with a blue spray bottle and the other with a long thin tube. “Are they gonna put a catheter in her?” he asked when they had turned a corner.

Rarity chuckled. “I haven’t a clue, nor a care. No mare should sleep the day away,” she looked down on him pointedly, “or colt, for that matter.”

He looked around, getting his bearings and tried to rush ahead. “What? I’m gonna see Sweetie! She could be in big trouble, what if she wakes up and wants to blame me? What if she forgives me?” There was a shout of anger and disgruntled yelling from the waiting room that distracted him enough for Rarity to interject herself into his moment of self deprivation.

“First, you need a bath. Shower, in this case, as a bath would be like stewing you in your own fluids, bleh. Now, you stop looking at me that way right now, Snickers,” she lifted him in her magic so they were at eye level. He was holding back giggles. “You know full well I didn’t mean anything of the sort.

“I simply meant to say that you shan’t bathe before you’ve showered the muck from yourself. Now, the nurse said there was a shower in the locker room, so we’ll detour there and dress you up like a prince going to save a damsel in distress.”

She placed him down and he followed. “Miss Rarity?”

Oh, my. He is so respectful suddenly? Whatever the girls did to him, please keep it up. “Yes, Snickers?”

“Don’t knights that rescue damsels usually have kids with them?”

Rarity looked aside and down at him in surprise. “W-well…”

“So, does that mean you want me and Sweetie to have sex?”

“Wha- I most certainly--”

“And doesn’t that mean that if you’re my mom, and she’s my aunt, that you’re encouraging incest?” Rarity sputtered and stopped in shock at the mere accusations he was leveling. “Why, Rarity, you’re such a naughty mistress. We’ll talk later,” he winked and walked under, pushed open a door, and left the mare in the hallway fuming at the past fifteen seconds and how impressed and angry she was.

Angry because he’s said what he’d said. Impressed he’d used her description in such a way, and upset that she’d been made the butt of another of his jokes. She looked at the room he’d entered and noted it was the staff changing room, then glared at the door. She opened it and walked in, wondering if the colt had planned their conversation to go as it had and end where it did.

The shower started and he yelped from the cold, but the rigidity of the floors prevented slipping, so she didn’t have to worry about that happening again. Her heart ached at the thought of her sister the evening before. Everything was finally going great, he’d been playing with her in a foalish way. She took a seat by a mirror and looked at her reflection, reflecting on the recent events.

Sweetie was treating him like one of her best friends. Then she slipped and everything went wrong so suddenly. I remember hearing a shriek of pain, then a blur of motion, a crack from Sweetie’s dock… then Snickers was shouting at her to run. To get her help.

She thought about the events and the only one who kept their head through it all was the colt that had the least reason to be upset with himself. She stood and smiled at herself, turned, then stopped. Her tail was as luxorious as always, bouncy and full of life. She looked at the shower area that her colt was, then back at the mirror.

Her eyes traveled along her tail and then darted to her flanks, it was the first time she’d ever noticed being reluctant to see her own mareparts. She glanced where her tail barely covered the entrance to her sacred temple and she blushed, looking away. It wasn’t anything new, she’d seen thousands of other mares’ parts.

She’s helped hundreds accent them for various dates or events. There were entire jewelry lines, some items of which she herself owned, dedicated to bring attention to that which lies beneath a mares tail… but she couldn’t recall actually looking at her own in years. She looked at the showers and then back at the mirror, at what she realized he must have felt when she’d teased him.

She shook her head but the stabbing thought stayed in her mind. She placed the box against the mirror along with a small bit of ribbon that bore her cutie mark on it, and went to shower again.

“Gyah?! Rarity, I can take care of this myself, okay?”

“No, I’m not here for you. Well, perhaps I am,” Rarity turned her rump away from him and she started the shower. “I realized that I am indescent around you, and as such I intend to make amends.” she turned her tail until it was under the water and she washed half an hour of work away.

The soaps and starches she used were gone with a couple passes of her brush and, with Snickers watching, she stepped out of the shower and walked away from him. “Is this better, darling?”

He raised an eyebrow. “Is what better? What’re you talking about?”

She smiled and turned to him and walked past. “Then that’s a yes. Don’t take too long, I have to see a stylist today and I hope we’ll be able to spent time with one another, finally.”

He stepped back into the water, still confused. The hot water was relaxing, it cleaned him better than any rains back home ever could have. He turned and faced the shower head, letting the water wash his face and tickle the skin beneath his fur. It was heavenly, and being a hospital he knew it wouldn’t ever run out.

He thought of Sweetie, though, and stepped on the petal to turn it off. He shook like a dog to moderate effect, then bit a towel from a stack when he passed them. Rarity surprised him with at least three towels rubbing across his coat and then pulling and tugging his mane. “Ow, gah, wai- that’s my ear. Don’t… eep!”

She finally let him go and looked at the frizzy colt with a bit of envy, then she pulled five brushes from the nearby shelves. He knew what was going to happen, and he actually looked forward to it. No pony hates a good grooming, and the brushes across his body were like magic fingers scratching every itch he didn’t know he had.

He shuddered and Rarity smiled, knowing he was enjoying it. She focused on a couple spots and when his ears drooped, his tail swayed, and his eyes fluttered, she knew she’d found the one spot on his back he couldn’t reach. The spot every creature has that is benign until bothered, then it spreads out letting that creature know it must be attended to.

She carefully stopped most of the other brushes while focusing two on the spot near his withers, she watched as he went still and his lips twitched slowly into a smile. He started to tilt and she stopped, knowing that if she didn’t he’d fall over and the magic would be lost. “There, all groomed. How do you feel?”

He noticed he was a little dizzy, a little giddy, a little confused, but he felt very content. “Uh… good? Yeah, I feel really good. Wow, that was amazing. Are those magic brushes?” he asked running up to her and looking at one.

“No, just years of practice. Now, stay still while I dress you. Only this once, this outfit is made so you can put it on yourself in no time at all.”

He giggled and bounced happily, taking a step back so she could hold the box between them. She opened the lid and they both gasped.

“R...rarity,” he said quietly. She shook her head, not wanting to hear him unhappy again after a good moment. He reached in and tossed it on the ground. She winced and looked away, preparing for the verbal lashing that he was going to give her. There was some scuffling, then silence.

“It’s amazing…”

She looked at him and the outfit on the floor. The turquoise was intact, but the legs were torn and the gold was missing. “Y-you like it? But, my cat, Opal…” she watched him from behind silently when he smoothed the shirt out and them, with surprising skill flipped it over to see the other side.

“It’s…” his voice cracked and she moved to stand beside him. “It’s the first time I’ve ever been given clothes. Nice, real clothes,” he sniffled and leapt up, hugging her neck and pressing his head under her chin. “Thank you,” he said quietly and let her go. “How do I put’m on?” he hopped over them and sat down, ready to learn.

Rarity moved by practiced motions, the shock of his affection still slowing her higher brain functions. She had gotten him dressed and, while she realized he did look good in it, and he was thrilled to the point he may have never been so happy, the outfit was still something she’d make for a gothic halloween party rather than casual wear.

He was too happy to notice her, though. He looked at his legs, one at a time, then his tail as it swished. He looked under himself and noticed a well concealed spot for him to use when he had to pee and when he took a couple steps it felt like a second coat across his body. “Rarity, thanks again,” he said giving her another hug.

“Think nothing of it. House rules and all,” she tittered and placed the ribbon back in her mane while the box she left on the counter for somepony else to use.

“No, you don’t get it,” he said stepping into the empty hall and turning towards Sweetie’s room, “this is the first new outfit I’ve ever had. It hasn’t been sitting in a locker for a hundred years. No one died in it, no one got drunk in it,” he smiled and watched his forelegs as he walked. “This is the best gift I’ve ever gotten.”

Rarity stayed silent, the thought that this outfit she’d rather give away was something so meaningful both troubled her greatly and inspired her to do more for him. As it happened, though, their thinking ended up leading them to her room where she was complaining loud enough to be heard outside the door.

They opened the door and walked in. “Rarity! Can you tell this nurse I don’t need my temperature checked?!”

A mare wearing a classic uniform held a thermometer in her lips and had a forehoof on Sweetie’s rump. “Ah, well… Sweetie, you should just let her do her job. The sooner it’s started the sooner it’s over, right?”

“Ugh, you’re on her side! Fine, whatever, just get it over with,” she grumbled and Snickers noticed she was being held up with a lattice net to keep her rump high, effectively leaving her like a top. “Gah, cold… Rarity, if you f-f-find Snickers, can you tell him I wanna talk with him? I wanna tell him it’s not his fault, because I don’t want him thinking it was.”

Rarity opened her mouth, but the nurse spoke first. “And, there we go. 100.2 degrees Farenheit. Perfect for a growing filly your age.”

“Great, can you let my rump go now? Rarity, I gotta get down. I can’t let Snickers see me like this,” she tried to reach for Rarity and began to spin with her motion. When her head crossed the bed at certain amount she stopped breathing and her eyes widened. Slowly a silvery mane and brown ears entered her view.

She blinked hard, hoping she didn’t just get her temperature taken rectally while whining about it in front of a colt. “Uh, hi Sweetie,” he said nervously, “glad you’re temp’s okay.”

She let out another shriek, but this time it was out of embarrassment. She flailed her legs, trying to spin so she couldn’t see him, like that’d make the last minute go away. She reached down with her magic and forelegs for the blanket and tried to cover her rump with it. After the first try she let it fall and lay relaxed like she’d been plucked from the tub as a filly by her tail. “Okay, go ahead and tease me.”

He leaned back and looked at Rarity, she was shaking her head and holding her forehoof to her eye. “What? Why would I tease you? Because you got your temp tested?”

Sweetie nodded as she reached an apex in her rotation and slowly rotated back so in several seconds she’d face him again. The nurse picked up the blanket and draped it over Sweetie so she now looked like a tortoise.

“No way, as an equine the best way to take a temp is rectally. Orally is inacurate because our mouths vary in temperature based on where the probe is set. Some have even tried armpits or ears, but no two ponies are the same size so the temperature from one to the next can vary so much that results will be inconclusive.”

There was a squeak from above Sweetie as the winch system rested her onto the bed again. The room was silent and all eyes were on him. The nurse let the rope go and spoke to him condescending. “Well, he certainly knows a lot for a colt, doesn’t he? Did you read a book a big mare had? I hope it didn’t have scary pictures for you.”

He looked up at her and scuffed his hoof on the floor. Rarity and Sweetie’s ears lowered, knowing what was about to come.

“Why would pictures in a book scare me when looking at you makes stallions run away crying?”

“Huh?! Why you naughty little brat! My brother told me how to take care of--” she had grabbed him and in a motion earth ponies had expertly mastered, was sitting with him across her legs. Her forehoof was raised and stopped halfway before it could come down.

The nurse was picked up in a blue aura and brought muzzle to muzzle with Rarity. “What’re you doing to my son?”

“Teaching him a lesson! He has no right to speak to adults-” she went silent when Rarity spun her around and lay her over the bed. “What’re you-” *Thwak* “Augh!” Rarity moved the mare to the now open door and tossed her out. The door slammed behind the mare and both foals looked at Rarity with awe.

Rarity looked at her hoof and grimaced. I really should have taken the shoe off before I did that.

“Wow, sis! That was so cool!”

“You were like ‘yank’ and then ‘spank’ and then ‘get outta here’!” He fell silent, his hopping slowing until he stood still. Sweetie had shuffled around her tether so she could see her nephew and sister, they were both staring at one another.

“Snickers… if you feel I went too far,” Rarity started and he held up a hoof to stall her. Several seconds passed where Rarity and Sweetie watched him, and he thought.

“Rarity?”

“Y-yes?”

“You like me, don’t you?”

Rarity looked at Sweetie, who motioned with her head quickly. “Yes, of course. What a silly question.”

“I…” he snorted and looked at the floor, his eyes darting from side to side, “I’m so confused. I,” he sat down. “I’m here, but I shouldn’t feel like this. I should feel scared or angry, I was supposed to be mad and… I thought I’d have to fight for everything.” He looked at her and then to Sweetie. “Why’re you so… I don’t know the words.”

Sweetie smiled at Rarity, “I think you’re thinking of being kind and generous?”

Rarity smiled and nodded. “Not to mention loyal? Sweetie, did you happen to meet a certain pony yesterday?” Rarity asked.

“Oh yeah, she made sure he had a lot of happiness and laughter, too. And I'm honestly happy you're family now. And an official CMC, too!"

Rarity chuckled and tapped her hoof to her chin. “Well, that only leaves one, then doesn’t it? However, I believe that one is inside you, and all you have to do is let it out.”

He sniffled and looked at her, eyes welling with tears at the feelings he was holding inside himself. Feelings he'd resisted and fought against for his whole life.

She touched his chest. “The last thing is magic inside you, let yourself feel however you want to feel and be yourself, be free.”

He grabbed her hoof and cried, warmth growing where her hoof touched him and it quickly spread throughout his body.

“Rarity?” Sweetie asked, “What’s happening?!”

“I… I don’t know,” she replied as he began to glow with a dull light. The tears landing on her leg evaporated as soon as they touched her and speckles of light began to spread between then. “Sweetie, stay back! Hold on, Snickers, I’ll get you some help.”

She tried to pull away, but he was rooted to the spot and his hold was not only physical. She felt her magic pull her towards him when she moved. Lost and unsure, she watched the light accelerate along her arm and as it covered her body just as it covered his, she leaned over him in a hug and pressed her lips to his forehead. “Let it out.”

Waking Up

Five friends and a baby dragon sat, stood, or paced in a waiting room in various states of unease. A nurse walked into the room and they all gave her their undivided attention. She shook her head. “Sorry, I’m just going home. Somepony will know what’s going on between them soon, I promise.”

She looked crestfallen when she left the group a little worse off than they had been.

“Ah don’t get it, Twi. Explain ta me how ya can’t fix ‘em?”

Twilight stopped her pacing leaving Spike’s footfalls the only ones in the room. “I told you, I told you all, I don’t know what kind of spell it is! I’ve only seen something like it once, but I can’t remember where!”

“It’s okay, Twilight,” Fluttershy climbed off her bench seat and moved to her friend, “it’s not your fault. Something happened between them, but they'll be okay, right?” Twilight nodded and lowered her head. “It’s not the elements, it’s not dark magic, and it’s not aliens,” she insisted to Rainbow before she could say anything. “I think it’s time you took a seat with us and relaxed.”

Twilight’s ears twitched and then stood up. “Time? Time?! This is no time to worry about time!” Fluttershy stepped back and turned away, her mane hiding her face. “No, Fluttershy, I didn’t mean it like that. Starswirl’s time spell, that’s where I’ve seen this magic before, only it’s different.

“I have to scan them again,” she said and marched to the room Sweetie, Rarity and Snickers had been given. Twilight opened the door to see Doctor Hoof and his wife, Nurse Tender looking over a chart. They’d fallen silent when the door opened and we’re pleased to see Twilight, again. They were, in fact, displeased when Spike walked past her and made his way to the bed.

“Miss Twilight, we’ve already spoken and you’ve been asked to not interfere with our diagnosis process.”

“I have an answer,” Twilight said confidently and lit her horn. Her friends came to the door and peeked in from both sides. Twilight watched as Rarity twitched and jerked her free limbs while Snickers was holding one of her hooves tightly still. The bed across from them on the other side of the room held Sweetie, who was still held with her tail up, but was just as unconscious as the other two.

Twilight’s magic danced in the ethereal plane around the duo, touching them at Twilight’s will to test the magic being used. If it worked, she could have the three over for breakfast the next day and have them tell her about what led up to the incident and between. All she had to do was focus.

Her spellwork was masterful, but the spell they were under was the same. She relaxed her mind and felt for a weakness or opening into the spell, a way to see what they were seeing or, perhaps, who was controlling them or the spell. She noticed Rarity’s magic was pulsing at incredibly fast rates, more than she’d use on her own in a year. That was when there was a moment between both of them that the field wobbled and she pushed against the spot.

She connected and in that split second of time she felt Rarity and Sweetie, but that was too much for her, it seemed. With sluggishness, her eyes opened in the real world to see the sun had set and she was lying in a hospital bed.

Her friends were sitting and lying in different spots around the room with trays of food by them, silently snacking in a morose mood. “What happened to the sun?” Was her first question. The group of her friends snapped their attention to her and scrambled over their food to rush her with a hug. “What’s going on?” she asked with a hint of humor.

“Twi, it’s been two days. We didn’t know what happened…”

Rainbow got herself out of the embrace and looked at the other sleeping ponies in the room. “Did you do it? Are they coming out of it?”

Twilight shook her head and pushed her friends a little to give her space. “No, I was only there for a few seconds. I don’t know where ‘there’ is, but they’re together and,” Twilight looked at the bed beside hers, “I felt Rarity and Sweetie, I think it was their magic I sensed. They’re scared, lost, and feel so alone.”

They looked between the ponies on the beds and their mood sombered again. “So, no waking up party?”

“No, Pinkie,” Rainbow landed and kicked her tray of food, “no party. No Rarity, no little dude, no nothing!” she swung a punch through empty air.

Fluttershy looked at Rainbow, then she shook her head. “Rainbow, you’re not setting a good example.”

“A good example?” she snapped back. “For who?! They’re in a coma, Sweetie’s with them, wherever they are; the only good thing today is Twilight waking up. So don’t tell me anything about anything!” Rainbow flew toward a wall, facing it to hide her emotions from showing.

“You spent time with Snickers, just like I did,”

“Y-yeah, so?” Rainbow replied with a shaky voice.

The timid mare didn’t relent. “He’s tough, and whatever they’re all doing or going through, they’re together. I can’t help them now, but when they wake up, I’ll be here for them, can I count on you to help them with me?”

Rainbow closed her eyes. She had to stay strong, she told herself. She cleared her throat, as though nopony knew why, then answered quietly. “Fine,” she whispered in a rough voice that bordered on breaking. “But, don’t tell me about how to be me,” she met Fluttershy’s confidant eyes, “because I have to be me for him.” Rainbow nodded her head to the colt on the bed and everypony’s respect for Rainbow went up a little more.

Twilight looked between the two and then to Applejack. “Is there something between them and Snickers?” she asked quietly.

“Oh, Sugarcube. There’s a lot between them and that little colt ya didn’t know.”

“Oh? Well, could somepony fill me in?”

Rainbow flew over, then sat on Twilight’s bed with Fluttershy opting to stand beside her. “Well,” Fluttershy started, “I don’t know if I ever told you, but I’m a licensed therapist, and so is Dash.”

Twilight looked between the two and squinted at Rainbow. “Fluttershy, I believe. But you, Rainbow?”

“Hey, I can’t be awesome if I can’t help ponies be radical,” she said with a shrug.

A few hairs in Twilight’s already messy bed mane sprung up. “That doesn’t make any sense Rainbow…”

“Alright, before we get inta some kinda match, Ah’ll remind ya both we’re in a hospital, Twilight’s admitted and this here’s her bed, so off, Rainbow. Lastly, Twilight, it’s true. Why d’ya think Scootaloo’s all over her as an idol and whatnot?”

“Hm, I never really thought about it. I just figured it was generic hero worship and she’d eventually move on.”

“Hey, I’m not generic,” Rainbow opened her wings and hovered over where she was sitting, “and it’s because I helped her and now she follows me like a pet, wanting a little more ego building every now and again. That filly’s got some major attachment issues because her parents are only around her a couple months a year.”

“Oh, my. That’s so sad, maybe she needs a pet to keep her company. I’ve got so many that need good homes, maybe she’d like a birdie that has trouble flying to help encourage her to--”

“Not the time, Fluttershy. Look, we both spent time with him and Fluttershy said he’s really sweet and wants to be liked. When he was with me he was cool, funny, and just like any mare I’d ever wanna hang out with after sunset. He’s almost like an adult, but he isn’t,” she looked at Fluttershy who shook her head.

“No, I see him as a foal who hasn’t had a good life. He cried so much, and told me how hurt he was that he was a kid again, then I listened as he told me about his feelings since he got to Ponyville…” she trailed off and looked at Rarity, still twitching an ear or limb, “I scolded Rarity quite harshly and I haven’t apologized yet.

“That’s why I know they’re going to be okay and come out of this better and closer than before. Rarity would never leave thinking anypony was upset with her, and her shop needs her, too.”

“Hold on a tick, ya said you were in that spell fer only a little bit, but two days passed. What if they’re in there fer these two days, but it’s been longer fer them?”

Every eye went to Rarity and Snickers’s bed and Twilight bit her lip. “If that’s the case, then I hope they’re together and safe. What I felt wasn’t the best feeling, and I don’t use empathy magic. It really doesn’t have an application outside of finding changelings and psychiatry. Both of which aren’t in my skillset, at least until lately.”

Applejack placed a forehoof on Twilight’s bed. “Don’t even start, sugarcube. There’s nothin’ you coulda done. Ah guess all we can do is wait and when they come out of it, be there for ‘em.”

There was a round of agreement and a snort from under her bed. “Oh, I was wondering where Spike was.”

Pinkie finally spoke up. “Yeah, I took him out today and had lots of fun with the kids at the park, then we sent Princess Celestia a letter about you and Rarity and Snickers. Then we ate lunch and snacks and--”

“Wait, you wrote the Princess?”

“Oh, yeah. She’s busy and can’t come, but she said she’d like us to keep her up to date on anything that happens and that she’d ask Luna to check in on everypony’s dreams.”

Twilight relaxed and sat back into the pillows on her bed. “Whew, that’s a relief.”

“Don’t Ah know it. Last thing we need is ya runnin’ around, tryin’ ta make the hospital all fancy. But, thinkin’ back on it… couldn’t you use some ‘a that empty magic on them now and let us know how they’re feelin’?”

Rainbow had turned with her back against the wall, leaning on two legs and trying to look casual. “Yeah, there’s gotta be something in their ethereal magic stuff that you can work with. It’s what you do, right?”

Twilight rubbed her temple. “Rainbow, it’s not that easy. I touched their shared magic and was asleep for two days, you said. Who knows what’ll happen if I try that kind of spell, combined with whatever spell is already affecting them? There’s a sage rule that’s older than time, girls. It goes ‘Don’t mix magicks.’

“Now, what that refers to mainly is trying to combine the different types of magic with one another or with another discipline. If I’m using traditional aether spellwork as a unicorn, then I can’t cast a dark magic spell because they’re not compatible. It’s like trying to set water on fire or melt two ice cubes by putting them in the freezer.”

Rainbow yawned. “So, don’t mix magic. Got it, can you stir it in their magic or maybe shake it in?”

The others chuckled at Rainbow, Twilight’s eye twitched, then the room brightened and their attention was on Rarity’s horn as its light turned blinding. Twilight cast a shield, just in case, then it died out and they all rushed to the bed, hoping it was a sign they were waking up. Tears ran from Rarity’s closed eyes, Snickers teeth were clenched. They turned their attention to Sweetie and rushed over to see her and didn’t notice any change.

Rainbow landed in Applejack’s spot from before Twilight woke up and pulled her friends tray onto her forelegs. “Well, let’s hope that means they’ll be awake soon.”

-.-.-

Rarity’s eyes opened slowly and she inhaled deeply. She pushed herself up and looked around her, flinching at every sound she heard. A quiet soft groan got her attention and she scooped Snickers into her forelegs. “Shush,” she said quietly and climbed off the bed with him. He nodded and looked around the room. “Do you see Sweets?”

He shook his head and glanced everywhere. The room was clean, the air was fresh, there were birds chirping, and he didn’t have hunger pains or cramps. He was, for the moment, terrified. “Where are we?”

“It’s a trick, it has to be,” Rarity said and sniffed loudly, the scent of clean air was amazing. “The air’s so clean… Snickers?” She looked down at him and noticed him holding her leg, looking at it intently. She gasped in shock and looked at him from above, then at her leg. Her hoof was in need of some care, but it was clean and unbroken; more importantly, she was clean.

She reached for her mane and felt her hooves run through it like it was the morning after he came into her life. She looked at him inspecting himself, then used her magic to pull him into a hug. “Did it happen? Are we home? Our home? Oh, please, don’t let this be a trick…” she got to her hooves and took a step, sighing in pleasure. “I’ve forgotten how nice it is to have balanced hooves, how are yours feeling?”

He nodded and took a few steps, a smile growing on his face. “Good, better than in a while.”

“I’m pleased to hear that, I’m going to check the door. If I find Sweets, maybe we can find out what’s going on.”

“Okay, mom. I’ll be here,” he said smiling at his hoof as he turned it from side to side and looked at the frog. “It’s so clean,” he whispered and Rarity smiled at him, then was back in the moment.

“No, young colt. You’re staying by my side,” she said sternly and he sighed, but trotted to her, his hooves gliding on the floor. “And stop that, you’ll scuff your hooves.”

He snickered. “Yeah, don’t worry about the floor; just my hooves.”

“Darling, you know full well the effort I take into making sure you look your best at all times. What do I say, after all?”

They spoke at the same time. “A good first impression makes all the difference.”

“Exactly, now, if anything happens you know what to do, right?”

He nodded hesitantly and moved under her, ready to react at a heartbeat. She opened the door and looked out into the hallway of the hospital. They took tentative steps from their room, giving total attention to the stallion that’d dropped his notes on the floor when he’d seen them.

“Miss Rarity, you’re awake, too! Please, return to your room and I’ll let Twilight and the others know you’re awake. Oh, and you brought the colt with you,” he looked at the colt hiding under her. “If you’ll give me ten minutes, I’ll have your friends on their way,” he grinned happily and it unnerved the mare and colt.

Rarity turned and took a defensive stance that stopped the doctor. “Miss Rarity? I... apologize if I’ve done something wrong. If you’re uncomfortable you can wait in the hall, if you wish. I’ll have to call a nurse to watch over you though. You’ve all been asleep for a week since that morning and we all have so many questions to ask.”

Rarity looked him over and kept her eyes on him while she bent down to Snickers. “What’d’ya think? Should we trust him?”

“Yeah, ma… but I’m keeping an eye on him. But, Sweets?”

“Where’s my sister?” She asked firmly, narrowing her eyes and offering no room for word play.

He looked at her and swallowed. “I’ll send her to your room right away. We’d taken her to an exam room to check the status of her tail and you all seem to have awoken at the same time. It’s just more to add to the amazement of this mystery,” a smile quirked his lips.

“I shall tell you only once,” Rarity glared at him so intensely he cowered back, even before her horn lit adding to her menace, “if you harm my sister, or try to harm my son, I shall make it the last harm you ever deliver unto another. Am I clear?”

Doctor Tender nodded, splayed his ears back, and lowered his head in supplicance.

Rarity nodded and carefully turned around before backing into the room with Snickers moving with her pace, still mostly under her. “We’ll just wait in here, good sir. If you’re really trying to acquire my friends, then you know their names and where they live, so I’m sure you’ll be back in no time with them.” She leaned down to Snickers and clicked her tongue twice, quickly. She closed the door and pulled a bed over, blocking it closed.

“There, we have only a moment, darling,” she turned and checked the smaller objects and moved various items with her magic while he checked the drawers, cabinets, and vents for anything indicating traps or danger.

He finally came to the windows, where he stopped. Rarity moved to him and stopped with him, looking over the lands they both called home. Rarity stood over him protectively as they looked at a view that had green as its primary color

It wasn’t like anything she’d come to know as a new normal, and it wasn’t going to; if she had anything to do with it. She wrapped her leg around his barrel and nuzzled into his mane. “You know, Snickers…”

“What’s that, ma?”

“You’re naked again.”

He giggled and blinked at the wondrous land they lived in. “I don’t give a shit.”

She giggled and she bopped him on the muzzle. “What’ve I been telling you about that?”

“That my first year’s allowance is goin’ right into a swear jar when I get home?”

“I think I’ll turn those saved funds into a vacation around Equestria. We’ll see the largest cities in their prime,” she pointed to a random mountain range, “take a taxi from place to place and make memories that will bring us closer,” there was a knock at the door and they both turned to face it. Rarity leaned closer to him. “And if you’re nice, Me and Sweets might bring you along.”

He laughed and moved to his safe place as her horn lit and the bed moved. The door opened and Sweetie poked her hoof into the room quickly, then pulled back. “One and one is two.”

“But Rarity is here for you,” Rarity replied with a relieved exhale. The door opened with a shove from Sweetie's shoulder and she charged to the others, joining a group hug that didn’t bring a single tear, only exhaustion. “Sweets, I think we’re home. Sweet Celestia’s tiny teats, I pray we are.”

Sweetie leaned back and swatted Rarity’s ear. “What’d you tell me about that language?”

Rarity pulled her back into the hug. “Not right now, darling. We’re having a good moment.”

A moment later she was looking out the window, two companions and family members by her sides. They all looked out the window in silence and tranquillity. "Mom?"

"Yes, little one?"

"Are you gonna tell about what happened?"

"Certainly," Rarity looked down and met his eyes. "I've seen where you're from and what can change. I won't let everything fall apart over trivial matters or greed.

"The only way to do that is with the help of my friends. Besides," she chuckled, " there's no keeping a secret after five days together in another world."

"We could try," Sweetie suggested and looked at her flank. How am I gonna explain this to everypony?"

Rarity looked and gasped. "It came with us? But, how? And, I'm sorry. I know you wanted to earn it with your friends."

"Meh, I got over that a while ago."

"Darling, don't you remember all the fun you once had trying--"

"That's the point, it was fun. Now I'm out of the club and they've moved on."

"No they haven't," Snickers said from Rarity's other side, "your only a few days off. Just pick up where you left off."

Sweetie made to get up, but Rarity's magic tugged her tail to hold her down. "Ouch! Rarity, I broke my tail, remember?"

Rarity stopped her magic. "I'm so sorry,Sweets. After so long, I've forgotten such small things."

"I'm not mad, I was just upset, again."

"All is forgiven. Now, who wants a real shower?"

.*.*.*

The rest of the day was wrought with medical tests and magical scans as the three were isolated and checked over for any lingering physical harm or damage that may have occurred from their ordreal.

The thought of a shower kept them ready. Once they were allowed to rest in their room the first thing they did was take the communal shower they'd wanted so badly.

Rarity stood behind the foals and helped them wash, then they switched spots so she could wash while they started to play. Finally, once all clean to the point their bodies were practically squeaking, Rarity finally lay under the hot water and joined them in their game of splashing one another from puddles of water they could gather in their forelegs on the floor.

There was a rapid series of knocks that scared them, Rarity standing and protecting her sister and son as they rushed under her. Her horn lit and she readied herself for whatever may break through the door.

“Rarity? Snickers? Sweetie?! We’re here, it’s Fluttershy--”

“And Rainbow, open up!” the knocks happened again and Rarity’s heart soared.

She ran to the door and opened it, leaping up to tackle a startled Rainbow from the air. The other two screamed in joy and leapt on the cyan mare. “We missed you, Rainbow.”
“I missed her more.”
“No way!”
“Totally!”
“Prove it!”
“I don’t have ta, I know it.”

“Um,” was all Fluttershy managed before the ponies looked at her. Rarity’s magic pulled her into the pony pile of affection against both pegasi’s wants or wills. The shower was still running, lending a constant white noise to the happiness that filled the room, even as Rainbow pulled herself from under them all.

“Bleh, gross… foal water,” Rainbow stood up and looked like she’d just taken a bath, having all that water fall onto her. Fluttershy pulled her limp mane from her face and moved it behind her ear. “Woah, Flutters. You have a nice face, you should really show it off more.”

Fluttershy blushed and turned her head by habit. It was then Rainbow saw that Fluttershy might have always been hiding the huge half smile behind her mane while the other side seemed relaxed. “Oh, I don’t think so.”

Rarity pulled the foals to her. “Darling, your mane isn’t covering anything at the moment.”

Fluttershy opened her eyes and looked at Rainbow. “I… it wasn’t…”

Rainbow opened her wings and flapped them once, drying them and giving her lift. “I wasn’t teasing, you should try to show your smile more, that’s all I’m saying.”

Rarity let the foals go and they looked around the room to take in the scene, then galloped back into the shower to play in the extra space.

“Why don’t they have baths in these places? Honestly,” Rainbow asked, “when I was here for my wing that one time, I just wanted to soak.”

“A question for another day, Rainbow. By the by, darling… do you know when the others might show up?”

A small explosion and streamers, confetti, and a few balloons that floated up rained on a shimmering blue shield that appeared faster than thought and kept the other three occupants of the room safe. Pinkie pressed her face to the shield and looked in, getting a startled scream from Rarity. Her shield failed and the two mares she was standing in front of became a barrier for her.

“Awe, I popped your bubble,” Pinkie said looking at the area her face was pressed against. “I’ll make you a new one,” she reached behind her and pulled out a bottle of bubble soap and a giant wand, then inhaled.

“No!” Snickers shouted thinking it was a weapon, he ran at Pinkie, tackling her and raising a forehoof. “Leave my mom alone,” he shouted and swung down, landing his punch in a whoopee cushion held in Pinkie’s hoof close to her body; it let its sound flow slowly, loudly, and freely.

“Gah, right there,” she gasped and pretended to pass out. The sound effect finally tapered off and Snickers realized he was naked, soaking wet, sitting on a naked mare that he’d just made wet; and that the same wet mare just made a fart sound after saying something that is easily misconstrued, and then pretended to pass out.

It took two seconds before it all struck every part of his mind and he fell off her laughing like he had the night he’d met Rainbow.

His legs kicked and he rolled side to side, holding his barrel. He snorted, giggled, and repeated. His laughter began bringing in more laughter from the group of five. It was a great moment, and one they’d recall in the days going forward.

Reintegration (skippable)

Author's Note

This chapter was removed, then I chose to keep it in the story.
The reason for the removal is that it expands on the chapter title, but is just not needed.
However, it's long and took a lot of work, so read on as it still fits the narrative, but, once again, is skippable.

Reintegration (skippable)

“Sweetie Belle!” Scootaloo shouted when she saw her friend from behind. Apple Bloom was right beside her and ran to glomp the filly together. In a swift motion, Sweetie spun around and grabbed Scootaloo with her foreleg and continued her turn, striking Apple Bloom with her friend and sending them sprawling across the hospital corridor.

She looked down at them with a frown that broke after a second. She smiled weakly and rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly. Her friends untangled from one another while she chuckled nervously. “H-hey, girls. Been a while, huh?”

Scootaloo grinned and stepped slowly towards Sweetie. “That was an awesome move, did you dream yourself into a master of hoof fu? Or karatato, where you’re one with the earth and focus its power through you?” she hopped back onto her hind legs and made a chopping motion that Sweetie stepped back from.

“Scootaloo, that’s silly. Only earth ponies can master that, and we’re not even on the ground. We’re in a building… but, Ah do wanna ask about hoof fu, did you learn it in them few days ya were out?”

Sweetie shook her head. “I… don’t know right now. I was gone for so long, so much happened… and then I wake up and only a few days’ve passed. Stay,” she insisted when her friends took a step toward her, “back. I’m not really okay to be touched again, not yet.” They looked at her with confusion.

“Uhm, are you okay, Sweetie? You’re acting weird.”

“Ah’m sure we can help. After all, we’ve come up with some great crusadin’ ta get our marks and--”

“Sweetie! You got your mark?!” Sweetie hopped back again and lowered her horn, bringing it to a glow. Both fillies ignored her, not really understanding it as they ran to her sides and looked intently at her cutie mark. “What’s it mean?”

“When’d ya get it? Is it somethin’ about sleepin’? Cuz it doesn’t look much like it.”

Scootaloo placed a hoof on Sweetie’s mark and jerked back when Sweetie trembled. Sweetie backed away from her friends and shook her head. “I’m… I’ve gotta go!” she ran away as quickly as she could into a nearby room, leaving her friends more confused than before.

“Apple Bloom, something’s wrong with her.”

“Ya think?”

“Yeah, but we gotta find a way to help her. We can’t just let this go, she’s a crusader for life; just like us. C’mon, let’s go talk to her again.”

“Ah dunno, that didn’t work a minute ago. She was as antsy as a carrot in an all ya can eat buffet.” Scootaloo looked at her friend with a deadpan expression. “What? Ah’m still learnin’ countryisms, it wasn’t that bad, was it?”

Scootaloo shook her head in good nature. “It was fine. I can’t wait to hear what you come up with next time.”

They stood in place, thinking. Nurses passed them and the fillies noticed that there seemed to be four nurses in the whole hospital, but they could have been mistaken. Finally, they decided friendship was more important than anything and followed Sweetie into the room. There they saw Rarity holding Sweetie while Snickers sat beside Fluttershy in a corner, talking quietly.

“Wow, it’s great to see you all awake! We knew you’d be fine when you woke up, Rainbow Dash told me so.”

Sweetie held Rarity a little tighter and buried her face in her sister’s coat. Rarity winced and used a forehoof to push Sweetie’s horn a little to the side. “Sweetie, mind your horn, please. As for you girls; yes, we’re awake and still recovering. Sweetie needs some time, but perhaps you’d like to wait or tell her about your exploits over the past…” she glanced back to Fluttershy to recall an earlier conversation, “week, or so.”

“Yeah, Ah think that’d be okay, right Scoots?” Her friend nodded and they went to a short bench that had seen a lot of use over the years, the cushion was almost flat and provided no softness or support for their sensitive legs, but the fillies paid it little attention and faced her friend. “Well, when ya passed out, we were worried as sick as a dog eatin’ vegetables.”

She looked to Scootaloo and grinned when she got an affirmative nod at her -ism. “After a couple days, we had ta go back to school and didn’t do good at all.”

“All we could think about was you and Snickers. No offense, Rarity.”

“None taken, dear.”

“We didn’t get a lick ‘a trouble from them bullies, though. They were sportin’ a couple scratches and bruises,” she shook her head with a slight frown and looked at Snickers, who was wrapped in Fluttershy’s wing and whispering. “Diamond had stitches on her muzzle. They said they were playin’ around at the old house on 13th street and fell down a flight ‘a stairs.”

“Oh, dear. They’re alright, arent’ they?”

“Yeah, Miss Rarity. But they didn’t deserve… to fall down the stairs and get so messed up.”

Rarity followed their glances and sighed. “It was Snickers, wasn’t it?” They shook their heads. “Now, now. I’ve come to understand him better than anypony. I understand why he did it, but that doesn’t mean he won’t be in some trouble. On the plus side, you’re bully free now, aren’t you? Isn’t that a good feeling?”

They nodded weakly and looked down. “Now, darlings, don’t feel that way. Everything is turning out alright. Sweetie needs some time to adjust to being back and when she does it’ll be like no time has passed at all.”

“Miss Rarity, what does that mean? You and Sweetie make it sound like you’ve been gone for a long time, but it’s only been five days. Are you feeling okay? I can get a nurse if you have a fever or something.”

Apple Bloom made to stand up, but was tugged by her tail back down with Rarity’s magic. “You’ll do no such thing. Physically we’re all fine, especially now that we’re back,” she looked at her foreleg and giggled. “We just need time to talk to adults about something that we shared, to help us feel better in our hearts and heads.

“I fear that Sweetie is most changed of us all. It will take some time, and she won’t ever be the same filly you knew a week ago, but she’s still your friend and loves you. She just has to remember why and how.”

The two fillies, again, looked at one another and shook their heads. “Ah’m just not gettin’ it.”

Sweetie pulled back quickly and looked at her friends with tear lines marking her face. “You won’t ever get it! I don’t want friends, all I need is you to leave me alone!” She pushed against Rarity and turned around, ran into the bathroom, and slammed the door. All eyes were on the bathroom in the ensuing silence.

“Ah guess we should go. Miss Rarity, it was nice ta see ya again, and can ya tell Sweetie we’re here when she’s ready.”

Scootaloo followed Apple Bloom from the room, the hissing sounds of Snickers talking with Fluttershy resumed and Rarity was admiring her mane. Scootaloo hung her head and walked out of the room.

*-*-*

Sweetie sat in the shower stall, her butt and tail in a puddle of cold water from the shower she and Snickers had taken a couple hours prior, just because they could. She sniffled and it echoed in the small room. Quietly she began to sing to herself.

“Once there was a song I sung. I sung it all day, all night long. There wasn’t a worry to be had, and every day I was glad. I had my friends and I had so much fun, I played under the afternoon sun. When the night would fall, I’d go to sleep and never fall. Then I went to a place somewhere, I spent so long living with a fear.

“I hid and ran, ate from cans. My world was taken away from me and my friends I never was again to see,” she sat with her back against the stall, “so much happened that I can say, I wished to come home, to see my friends one day~.

“Now I’m home and I’m not me… who am I… supposed to be?”

There was a knock on the door. “Sweets, are you doing alright? You’re singing with your lovely voice again. Is it a sad song?”

“No,” she replied with a sharp tone. “I’m not singing so leave me alone.”

The latch clicked and the door opened. Rarity walked in and closed the door, moving to stand over her sister. “My darling little sister, you needn’t cry. You’re here with family, we tell no lies. If you wish a sad song to sing, sing for a single dream.” She hugged her sister and sat beside her. “Sweetie, we’re home. You don’t have to sing or be sad, alight?”

“I know, but I don’t. It’s so hard to be home and see everyone again. See how little they actually changed, how innocent they still are, everything I lost. Things they won’t really understand that we’ve been through. What am I supposed to do?”

Rarity pulled her sister tighter against her side. “We talk about our experience and hope that those we tell are strong enough to handle it. That’s all we can do,” she giggled.

“What’s so funny?”

“I’m just thinking of what the girls are going to think when I tell them about my leg or mane.”

Sweetie giggled quietly. “They won’t believe it, you’ll have to try really hard. Your mane is all they think you care about.”

“Well, it’s not everyday one catches lice and fleas with no way to cure them for a hundred miles. It was a choice I had to make,” she sat taller and sniffed indignantly.

Sweetie shoved her a little. “You’re a goof.”

“Yes, well, someone had to take care of you and keep some things normal.”

Sweetie nuzzled against her sisters coat and sighed contentedly. “I don’t care, those ponies where we were are gone now. We can make a new normal now.”

“That we can, Sweets. Perhaps we should start calling you Sweetie Belle again?”

She shook her head and pressed her forehead against Rarity’s coat to hide her face. Another gentle push of her horn followed. “No, Gem, you can be you again. Snickers has always been Snickers, but I can’t be that filly. Not after everything that happened.”

“Well, it is your choice. If you ever want to change back, we’ll support you either way.”

“Thanks, you’re the best sister a pony could have.”

“As are you.”

*_*_*

In a conference room, Rarity sat at a round table with seats for each of her friends, her sister, and her adopted son. The cheering and reunified jubilance had passed, Pinkie had been much calmer when dispensing cakes and drinks, and Fluttershy say between Sweetie and Snickers while Rainbow sat on the far side of Snickers, so he was surrounded by strong support.

“Alright,” Twilight said loudly enough to be heard over the din of cross table conversation. Pinkie crunched on a mouthful of vegetables and quickly gained the ire of the room. She swallowed her mouthful of lightly chewed veggies with a loud gulp and gave a hoof wave that was the equivalent of a thumbs up.

“Thank you, Pinkie. Well, Rarity said she was ready to tell us about what happened when she and the foals were asleep under the spell, are you ready, Rarity?”

Spike opened the door with a small bowl of gems and a shaker of salt perched on his head between two spines.

“Yes, I shall warn you that the story is long and quite graphic at times. Fluttershy, if I’m about to say anything that may bother you, I’ll tell you and I know how to cast a silence spell if you need it.”

“Thank you, if it’s not too much trouble, I’d appreciate that.”

“Not a problem, darling. Now, the story will run a while, so we’ll have to take breaks or.... ah, yes. Spike, the same applies to you as it does Fluttershy, only you shan’t receive a choice on the matter.” He shrugged and popped a gem in his mouth and chewed. She looked at him caringly and resumed.

“So, we’ll cover what we can through the rest of the day, and until the tale is told we’ll meet here, save for obvious reasons.”

“Yeah, lunch,” Rainbow said and patted her belly. “Speaking of that,” she reached under the table with a wing and pulled a bag of trail mix from her saddle bags. She looked between Twilight and the vegetable tray, her smile turning into a grin as she grabbed celery and some ranch.

Snickers tapped his hoof on the table. “Okay, so, we gonna start, or just fuck around all day?”

Rainbow nickered in humor and sprayed ranch from her lips onto the table. “Jeez, I missed your humor, ya little jerk.”

“Who’re you calling a jerk, you jerk stallions off for a bit a dozen.”

Rarity pressed her hoof to her forehead below her horn while the rest of the table who didn’t know him sat slack jawed in shock.

“Yeah, better a bit than get bit,” she chomped her teeth and Snickers shivered and leaned away, feigning fear.

“No, not that! Anything but that.”

“Are you two nearly done?” Rarity interjected, the attention was on her and Twilight raised a hoof to make a point.

“One more, ma, please?” Snickers looked at her and pouted, then pressed his forehooves together.

“Fine, but make it quick.”

“That’s what she said,” Rainbow chimed and and got a hoof bump from Snickers and a laugh from Sweetie and Pinkie.

“Okay, okay. Rainbow, I feel sorry for you foals because your teats are so small they’ll never get a drop.”

Rainbow crossed her forehooves over her crotch and frowned. “That was low blow, kid.”

“That’s how you like it,” he answered and sat back in his chair.

“That is enough! Rainbow, you should feel ashamed,” Twilight planted her hooves on the table and pushed herself up. “That’s no way to talk to a colt, you should apologize.”

“Psh, for what? He started it.” Snickers nodded in agreement with Rainbow.

“That’s no excuse, he’s precious and should be treated like the treasure he is.”

“Yeah,” Snickers said with a smirk, “treasure me, Rainbow.”

“I’ll treasure you into a chest and toss you in the ocean.”

“Rainbow Dash!”

Snickers laughed out loud. “Hey, somepony finally screamed your name, how’s it feel?”

Rainbow fell off her chair laughing, Twilight and Applejack weren’t amused at all. Applejack pushed back from the table and hopped from her chair to stand over Rainbow. “Ya stop that nonsense right now, Rainbow. Ya get up and apologize to that colt or else.”

Rainbow rolled to her hooves and flapped her wings to hover over her friend. “Or what? You’ll throw an apple at me?”

“No,” Applejack said and stomped her hoof on the floor three times and glanced down. Rainbow rolled her eyes and landed, raising an ear so Applejack could whisper to her. As seconds passed, Rainbow’s wings rose and she began to show her plumage, getting a bright blush from Fluttershy and a frown from Twilight.

“Snickers, I’m so sorry I started saying bad words to you and I hope you’ll forgive me,” Rainbow said quickly and looked sadly at him.

He looked from Rainbow to Applejack. “Darn, she’s got you whipped.”

“Rainbow Dash, that ain’t somethin’ ya tell a colt, much less anypony!”

The ponies at the table started to laugh, Rainbow and Twilight blushed, while Fluttershy had hidden behind her mane, behind her wings. Spike shrugged at Rarity, who looked at him bemused, expecting him to join in the laughter or act confused. He placed a gem on the table, pointed to Twilight, and then used a claw to circle the gem before pinching it until it broke.

Rarity inhaled and nodded once, glancing at the blushing mare who was about to lose her temper again. Rarity’s horn flashed and every voice was silent. “If we’re done having our fun, I suggest we take our seats and begin so that we may finish this sooner rather than later. I, and my family, wish to return to our home tonight and would like to reach a point in our tale that’s past the first ten minutes.”

Twilight was impressed at the silence spell, Applejack coughed, Rainbow looked between the others at the table and then seemed to scream loudly to test it, while Pinkie was breathing heavily, her ears twitch-twitch-twitching. Rarity’s horn flashed again and sound returned catching the trailing end of a shout, another cough, and a whimper from Pinkie.

Fluttershy was sitting with a smile and her eyes closed. “Oh, that was so nice. Rarity, can you do that again later? Please?”

“Not the time, Fluttershy. I’ll begin, unless one of your two would like to take the reigns?”

“Nope,” Sweetie crossed her forelegs.

“You got it, mom. Rock that tale.”

Rainbow puffed her cheeks and glanced worriedly at Applejack. She shook her head and pointed to her closed mouth, snorting a little laugh. Applejack pointed to Rainbow’s seat and she sat down. Snickers raised his hoof just under the table and Rainbow bumped it again. They shared another bonding moment and it did him good to have it.

“Very well, I’ll begin as soon as I take a sip of water to wet my palate.”

Stories

“Well, I can only speak from my perspective, but if either of you wish to chime in, then you may after you raise a foreleg for attention. This shan’t become a disorganized mess or I’ll silence you all again, understood?” Rarity looked at the foals, then to the adults around the room. Twilight had a stack of scrolls, ink pots, and several quills ready while the rest waited in their own ways.

“When I began speaking with Snickers in the hospital room with Sweets--”

“Don’t you mean ‘Sweetie’?” Twilight interjected.

“No, she’s changed her name to Sweets. I was Gem, and Snickers… well, he is who he is,” she smiled at the colt who nodded and pointed a hoof at himself. “May I begin, please?”

“Yeah, sorry,” Twilight said.

“Quite... well, I began speaking with Snickers in the hospital room and my sister was naming the virtues of Harmony, as we represent them.”

“Question,” Rainbow raised her foreleg and started. “You mean elements, right? ‘Cuz we’re there Elements of Harmony, not the Virtues of Harmony.”

Rarity sighed loudly. “The elements are representatives of virtues we possess and exemplify. You are loyalty, and you’re loyal with or without the element you’re attached to. So, it’s a virtue to be loyal… why am I explaining this?” Rarity asked herself. “If you have any questions about what I’m saying then please wait until we take a break, everypony.”

“Ugh, fine. I thought that was a good question, though.”

“It was, sugarcube. Rarity’s just a might upset ‘cause she wants ta tell her story but keeps gettin’ interrupted.”

Twilight waved her quill in the air. “Exactly, so can we please have calm and quiet so she can tell her story?”

“Yeah,” Pinkie shouted from behind Twilight and ducked down, popping up between Applejack and Rainbow. “If you can quiet down, then we can get to the story and then it’ll be done and we can have more cake!”

“Pinkie Pie,” Rainbow asked the mare bouncing beside her, “why don’t you eat cake now while she’d telling the story?”

“Because, it’s still in the oven!” She bounced behind Applejack’s chair and confetti showered down from above Rarity and Sweetie. “And there’s no better way to have cake then fresh from the oven, right?”

Pinkie was surrounded by a purple aura. “Pinkie, please sit down. This’ an important moment, Rarity’s going to tell us all about the spell that they were under and why they think it’s been longer than five days. Is it some kind of psychosis or was it an effect of a lost Starswirl the Bearded spell?”

Fluttershy raised a hoof. “Pinkie, if you have a cake and ice it, won’t the icing just melt away?”

“Most of the time, but there’s a super secret to baking a cake and icing it right away. I’d tell you--”

Rarity sat back with her forelegs crossed and blew confetti from her snout. Twilight looked around the table and shook her head. Her horn lit and everypony was frozen in place. “There, now you can tell me about the spell.”

“No, Twilight. This is more than the spell that was cast, or moreover the spell that took us away. We were talking about our virtues as ponies and what each of us brings to one another as a collective; what makes us ponies and how we live with one another. Snickers had a partial spell cast on him when he was sent here.

“Partial, because it sent his body and mind here, but left a piece of him where he’s from. When he opened his heart to Harmony, part of the spell activated to bring him back with the power to fix everything, or so was the plan. By us being there, and him connecting directly to me, the spell didn’t work as intended and it brought all of us with him.”

Snickers raised his foreleg. “Yeah, only it wasn’t the right time or place. It was one third of the way and right here,” he tapped the table.

“Yes,” Rarity agreed, “we went one third of the way to his actual time and home, stopping here, in the future. Or, rather… a future.”

“So,” Twilight asked, “he’s from the far future and was sent back, but when he went back, he only went somewhat in the future because you two,” she hesitated, “cut the spell into thirds?”

Rarity sat up and nodded. “Yes, exactly, Twilight.”

Twilight chuckled. “That’s not how time works, Rarity. You don’t just divide by how many ponies are traveling to get to where you’re going; otherwise if I could send this quill into the future an hour, then two quills would only go thirty minutes with the same spell.”

Rarity raised an eyebrow. “That’s exactly what I just said. The spell was to take him 650 years ahead, after everything was terrible and to a future with little hope but it wasn’t that bad. We went ahead two hundred and forty years, to a future we can stop with relative ease, as long as things go a certain way, or don’t.”

Rainbow groaned loudly. “Can we get on with this? I’m dying from boredom,” she whined.

“Ah agree with Rainbow. This’ interestin’ and all, but yer talkin’ over my head and Ah’m not followin’.”

Sweetie cleared her throat, getting the attention. “I’m leaving.” She slipped from her seat and Snickers followed her, with a look between then, Rainbow and Fluttershy followed, leaving the adults in the room with Spike.

“Well, I’ll begin then…”

Sweetie opened the door and the group left, following Sweetie and wondering where she was going. She returned to their given room and climbed onto Rarity’s bed. “Why’re you following me?”

“Um, you look unhappy,” Fluttershy said softly. Snickers agreed with a nod and Sweetie turned her head, looking at the wall.

“I’m fine, you should go back to the others.”

Rainbow flew to the bedside. “Look, you’re messed up, Snickers is messed up, Rarity’s messed up. You’re not getting away from us, so don’t bother trying, because we’re gonna make you feel better or I’m gonna follow you everywhere you go until you talk about it.”

Sweetie looked at Rainbow with a hint of anger. “Why, so you can stalk me? Foalnap me, make you tell you everything? Real life isn’t a book, Rainbow. You can’t just follow a filly and get what you want.”

Fluttershy moved between the two and looked at Rainbow. “She’s right, Rainbow. Your method isn’t going to work with her, not right now. Sweetie, may I talk with you alone? Just us about how you’re feeling?”

“Why do I need to be alone? I’ll tell everyone. I’m mad, and angry, and sad. I want to hide under a rock, I wanna run away,” she felt deeply sad and her voice hitched. “I want to be like I was last week. I just wanna… be happy and… innocent.”

Rainbow looked away and rubbed her foreleg with her other forehoof. Snickers looked away as well. Fluttershy climbed onto the bed and draped a wing over the filly. “It’s okay to cry, Sweetie Belle. Everypony does sometimes.”

“I…” she sighed a shaky breath, “don’t know who I am anymore.”

Snickers huffed and reared up to lean on the bed, he looked at Sweetie. “Don’t give me that, Sweetie Belle. You know who you are; you’re cute. You’re sweet. You sing better than anyone I’ve ever heard, and you’re my auntie!”

She snorted a little. “You’re older than me.”

“Psh, by, like, two years. You’re the best aunt I could have or want, you can’t take that fact away. Even if you move under a rock and I have to send you a letter every day.”

Sweetie giggled and wiped her eye. “You’re a dork, you know that?”

“What? Me? No way. You’re a booger.”

“I’ll give you a booger sandwich,” Sweetie said back and inhaled.

“None of that, thank you,” Fluttershy said covering Sweetie’s nose with her primary feather. “See, Sweetie, you’re still the filly we all know and love. Why do you feel so confused, what would you like to tell me, us?”

Snickers climbed onto the bed and lay under Fluttershy’s wing beside Sweetie. “Yeah, you’ve been a weirdo for a while now. C’mon, let it out.”

She smiled and felt the warmth of the ponies comforting her. Rainbow moved to sit by the window, watching the sky and listening to the conversation on her own.

“It was a long time I was gone,” Sweetie said softly and nuzzled into Fluttershy. The mare’s coat smelled of wildflowers and calmed her. “Don’t even know how long, but we all did things to make it to the next day. Some things weren’t good, others weren’t as bad. I dunno, maybe it was just being somewhere else that started it all.

“It wasn’t clean, I had to watch what I stepped on because I got hurt without shoes. The food would make me sick if I ate too much, the water wasn’t clean unless we paid extra in a town. There wasn’t a safe place anywhere…”

SNickers sighed and leaned into Sweetie some more. “Sweets, ya gotta look at the positive too. You had us, we made a couple friends on the way, right?”

She smiled and it turned into a grin. “Yeah, they were pretty cool.”

Snickers grinned. “Remember when Clem snuck up on Rarity and tugged her tail?” Sweetie laughed and giggled. “How about when Rabbit made that face and hopped around like a bunny?” Sweetie kept laughing and started snorting. “How about when Clem would cuddle with anypony she could grab when she was asleep?”

Sweetie’s laughter tapered off and she had a happy tear in her eye she wiped away. “Okay, they weren’t all bad times.”

“I’d like to hear your stories, if you’d like to tell me, that is.”

Sweetie nuzzled under Fluttershy’s wing getting a nervous whinney from the mare and a slight blush. “You’re so comfy, Fluttershy. I forgot how much I missed fluff.”

“Oh, um… thank you? Your welcome?”

Sweetie hummed and sat up, shaking a little to get an uneasy feeling off her back. “Well, maybe I can tell you a story or two.”

Snickers got up and hopped from the bed. “Okay, I’m pulling a Sweets and leaving. I don’t need to hear stories to get my rocks off.”

Rainbow perked up and flew over to him leaving a contrail behind her. “Finally, let’s get outta here.”

Sweetie called to Snickers. “Um,” she traced a line in the bed linens, “c-can you call me Sweetie again? I… think I wanna be Sweetie again.”

He smiled and nodded, turned, then left with Rainbow following over him. They closed the door and Sweetie’s voice became muffled and then silent as the two moved down the hall. “So, little dude, where’re we going?”

“Outside.”

“Sweet, I can’t stand being inside sometimes. Hospitals are the worst, too.”

“Yeah, they’re just so uncomfortable.”

“I know,” Rainbow said loudly and gesticulated, “and the place is so boring.”

“The smells are awful.”

“The staff is gone when you need em and there when you don’t.” A memory of both happening when she twisted her ankle and was forgotten about in a room played in her mind.

“The undead are the worst! They jump out at you,” he looked down a hall to get his bearings, “and they’re always hungry. Why unlive in a place where noone goes?”

Rainbow looked at him, following above, wondering what he was talking about. “You’ve seen zombies in a hospital?”

He nodded. “That’s why I don’t like ‘em. Being in this one’s unnerving, but it’s not dangerous. Some of them, you’re a walking buffet,” he chuckled softly, with his young voice it sounded sweet. “You’ll never have to know about that, though.”

She flew to block him and looked at him, reading his expressions; from his ears to his posture, even the placement of his hooves from behind to front told her he was being honest. “Wow, dude… You gotta tell me about that.”

“Outside,” he said again and then followed where she pointed. She followed him, waiting for the warm air to buffet her body and flow through her feathers. Once they were near the waiting room, Rainbow darted ahead and left him trotting after her contrail out of the front doors. A nurse shouted after Rainbow for the wake her trail left and the papers that were scattered.

Once outside, Snickers inhaled and exhaled. A smile crossed his features and he moved to the grass off the path and rolled around for a few seconds, scratching an itch he couldn’t reach as well as savoring the feel.

He heard a squeak and rolled to his belly, looking at the source of the noise. He hopped to his hooves and looked at Diamond Tiara. “Hi,” he greeted her and she froze in place. “Lemme see your muzzle.”

She whimpered and hesitantly took a step toward him, then another until she was close. She bowed her head until he could see the back of her tiara. He looked at the stitches and hissed. “Ouch. Hey, look up, filly.”

She looked up with her eyes and he had to use his hoof to lift her chin. She flinched and trembled across her body. “Look, I’m sorry for what I did. I still think you’re an awful pony to bully such nice fillies, but you didn’t deserve to get hurt so bad. Close your eyes.”

She squeezed them shut and trembled even more, fearing what he’d do next. She felt lips kiss the top of her muzzle and her eyes opened wide. She stumbled back and then blushed brightly. She managed several squeaks before running into the hospital and leaving him behind her. He rolled his eyes and looked up for Rainbow.

He saw her tail hanging off a cloud farther away. “Hey, Rainbow! Zombies! Run,” he shouted and ran toward her. She got up so quickly the cloud darted away. She dove to him and picked him up. “Hurry, we’ve gotta get help. I’m not fighting a zombie horde.”

That was when she noticed Snickers laughing and she landed. “Not funny, dude.”

“...Yes it was. Hey, do you have something in you dinnuh?” he giggled at her.

“It’s DNA, okay? I get it, Twilight laughed so hard she cried when I said that,” she rubbed her neck awkwardly.

“Hey, I’ll never forget ‘dinnuh’ for the rest of my life. I might even start a religion. ‘The Monastery of Dinnuh, where we build ourselves from the ground up’.”

Rainbow bopped the crown of his head. “Stop teasing and start tell.”

He motioned to a spot in the grass and they lay down, Rainbow’s wings unfurling several times before she got them to her sides. “Ready?” He asked with amusement. She nodded excitedly.

Boutique (skippable)

Author's Note

Just like reintegration, this chapter was removed, then I chose to keep it in the story.
The reason for the removal is that it expands on the chapter title, but is just not needed.
However, it's long and took a lot of work, so read on as it still fits the narrative, but, once again, is skippable.

Boutique (skippable)

The evening later:

Rarity lay in her bed with Snickers and Sweetie by her sides. They were full of snacks and sweets, tired from a long evening of playing and having fun, and happy to be home and accepted. “So, how was your day?”

Sweetie moaned and held her extended belly. Snickers did the same and Rarity hummed a laugh. “I see, nothing else, then?”

“I made friends with the girls again,” Sweetie said, then hiccupped.

“I kissed Diamond Tiara.”

The bed rocked as the sister moved to look at him. He wasn’t cocky or smug, just silently suffering as his insides cramped slightly. “You did what, young stallion?!”

“Eh, it wasn’t sweet or anything, it was where I kicked her when she was down.”

Sweetie and Rarity sighed, falling back onto the bed. “I don’t know if I could stand having her as a niece in law.”

Snickers finally reacted by sitting up and regretting it, but looking over Rarity at Sweetie regardless. “What the fuck, Sweetie?!”

His mouth was sealed with blue magic. “That’s another bit in your jar, stop speaking that way or I’ll have to escalate your punishments. Recall your first hours here?”

His stomach rumbled and for the first time in a while, he cowered back from her. “Y-yes Miss Rarity. I’m sorry.”

She grabbed him with a foreleg and pulled him to her barrel. “None of that, now. I won’t have you living in fear of me, and I’m not Miss Rarity to you. We’ve established this.”

He pulled against her and groaned. “I’ve gotta go barf, I ate way too much,” he said casually and left the sisters in bed.

“Is he really gonna do that, Rarity?”

“I imagine so. Let’s not listen to that, else I may join him.” Her horn lit and the room was cast with a shimmering blue glow across the walls. “So… Sweetie, is it? What changed your mind in the few hours between out talks?”

“I just remembered that there were good times when I was Sweetie and being Sweets was because of the bad. Fluttershy and Snickers really helped. I know it’s not the same as before, but I kinda feel okay being back here and being me again.”

“That’s lovely! Tomorrow we should all go to the spa, I think it’s needed more than we know. And there’s one thing we have to work on, too.”

Sweetie looked at her sister. “What’s that?”

“Well, do you still want a special somepony?” Sweetie blushed and buried her face in her sister’s side. “Sweetie! What have I told you about your horn? You’re so careless I should just wrap a cloth around the tip.”

Sweetie moaned. “Do we have to get me a special somepony? I was just looking before.”

“Maybe so,” Rarity said happily, “but you’re growing up and your first estrus will be next year. You have to have your eyes on someone… er, somepony, right?”

Sweetie shook her head. “No, nopony. I don’t want gross kisses and to feel a stallion that way.”

Rarity giggled loudly this time. “Somepony’s thought about it, haven’t you?”

“No!” Sweetie practically shrieked in embarrassment.

“Ohhh, this is wonderful. Who is it? It’s not Snickers, is it?”

“Ew! Gross,” her expression matched her meaning. “He’s family, no way.”

“Technically, he’s not. But, I won’t press that issue. Who might it be that has your heart in their hooves? Hmm…”

“Don’t guess… he’s not even here.”

Rarity’s eyes widened and she hugged Sweetie to her side again. “Oh, oh my. I knew, but I didn’t think that much into it. Like us leaving…”

“Yeah, plus he was like, almost eighteen. That’s over twice my age, isn’t that gross?”

“Certainly not, darling. He would have been a fantastic father to your foals,” she teased and got hit in her side as a result. Pain shocked between her ribs and across her barrel.

“Stop it, Rarity!” Sweetie’s voice cracked and squeaked.

“Ouch, okay, okay. But, was he the first you’ve felt such things about?”

“Maybe.”

“No pony else?”

Sweetie looked at Rarity again, this time with frustration. “None of your business. And don’t ask,” she said as a headache started to build. “Ugh, now I’m getting another headache. Can we stop talking about this stuff, please?”

Rarity dropped the topic as quickly as Sweetie mentioned her headache. “What do you plan to do tomorrow? It should be quite relaxed, so will you spend it with your fellow crusaders?”

Sweetie rubbed her temples. “Yeah, they told me I’m a crusader forever! I’m gonna help them and Snickers find their marks, next.”

“That’s lovely, dear. Just remember that your mark is going to be as unique as theirs, so don’t try to get one the same way.”

“Well… we’re gonna try a couple things like I did, but they can’t sing; so we’ll find something for them just for them.”

“It’s so nice to have you back to the filly I remembered when we were having our little escapade. I loathe to have seen you turn into a monster chasing ponies and doing horrible things to them, like this.” Rarity turned to her side and began tickling Sweetie with her hooves and magic, getting her to kick and flail her legs as she tried to escape.

“Rarity, stop! Stop… I’ve gotta pee.”

Rarity stopped and let Sweetie run from the room and turn to the stairs. Now that she was alone she lay back and looked at the ceiling, counting the boards and trying to match them to what other parts of the same tree they were from. Snickers entered the room and climbed onto the bed.

“Welcome back Sni-” she heaved. “Sweet Luna’s tailhole, Snickers. Brush your teeth after vomiting, please!”

He groaned and climbed from the bed. “That’s another bit for your jar now,” he said passing the field of magic, leaving her alone in silence.

“Fluttershy would certainly love this silence,” she said as she spritzed perfume between the bed and the doorway. “Perhaps a visit to her cottage is due… I think Snickers would love to see it.”

She rolled to her side and looked at the closet. “Where did he go?! I couldn’t have teleported him that far, could I have?” she pouted and rolled back, replacing the perfume and grabbing a random book from her bookshelf. She began cycling through books and gave up. “Where are those two?”

Sweetie met Snickers in the bathroom and joined him brushing his teeth, both felt better and worse. Sweetie watched her nephew finish and step back. “Waif, Ah gofa quifon.”

“Okay,” he said and leaned against the wall by the door. A few seconds passed and she held the toothbrush in her magic.

“Are you happy to be back?” He cocked his head curiously. “I mean, you weren’t here long, and when you were, you were bad and then not as bad. I didn’t really ask before now, but what do you think changed to make you happier before,” she pointed to her flank, “all that.”

He shook his head, sighing. “I dunno. Maybe it’s pony nature to be good and happy, or it was. Something happened and we changed, but when I felt the virtues all at once for the first time it started something in me. I cared about you two, I never really cared about anypony or anyone. Now, even though I’m not sure about a home, I have a family.”

Sweetie grinned and hopped down, rushing to hug him. He looked away and accepted her embrace. “You’re the best pony I ever wanted in my family.”

“Heh, thanks.” She broke the hug and nuzzled his cheek. “Yeah, I’m gonna head back, okay?”

“Oh, okay. Have you checked your room out yet? It’s been a while.”

“No, I was only here a day and didn’t even get to sleep in it. You went to the hospital, remember?”

Her ears fell and her tail followed. “Oh yeah, but it wasn’t your fault.”

“I know, I guess. If I didn’t knock those bottles down…”

“We’ve been over this a million times,” she stomped her hoof in finality, “I scared you and you ran. If anyone’s to blame, it’s me for waiting until you were busy to scare you. I could’ve waited until after, so drop it,” her horn brightened, bringing her toothbrush to task. She turned, smacking her tail across his rump and he hopped out of the room.

“Fine, doesn’t make anything any better, though.”

He dodged a sphere of water she tossed and then ran around the corner. The smile he sported from the moment of fun stayed with him while he walked to his room.

He looked in and it was as boring as he’d left it, except for a small wrapped box on the bed. He knew it wasn’t there before and pulled it to the floor, then opened the lid. He fell back onto his flank and covered his mouth with his forehoof as he felt his eyes welling with tears. His other hoof picked a blue cloak from the box that had the logo of the Cutie Mark Crusaders on it.

He held it to his chest. “Can I please go ten minutes without crying?” he cursed himself.

“But that’s just what colts do,” Sweetie said from the doorway and walked to his side. The cloak was tugged from him and draped over his back. He stood up so she could smooth it over his back and clasp the collar latch closed. “I was gonna tell you with Rarity, but you’re one of us now.

“You’re not a Ponyville native, but you’re here to stay because you’re in our hearts.”

Sweetie giggled when he hugged her tightly and nuzzled into her neck. “Th-thank you, so much. Y-you’re the best thing to happen to me.”

She patted his back. “Yeah, Rarity’s kind of a bitch.”

“Sweetie Belle?!” They froze, Snickers still hiccupped and they both looked at the mare in the doorway. “That may be true, but you shouldn’t say such things about me, after all I’ve done for you since you were a yearling.”

“Sis…”

“Tut-tut. At this rate I’ll be able to open a new boutique in Canterlot with how much your jars will fill. Honestly,” she fluffed her mane, “I leave you alone for five minutes and the truth is finally revealed.”

They looked at Rarity and moved side by side. They whispered a couple words to one another, nodded, then returned their attention to Rarity, who watched with curiosity.

“Cutie Mark Crusaders, charge!”

They charged Rarity and she let them tackle her into the hallway and peppered her with kisses and tickles to the point Rarity couldn’t cast a spell to defend herself.

Tree Fort

Snickers dragged his hooves against Rarity’s adamant protests, however she didn’t have the energy to fight with him after her day so far. She’d gotten little sleep, her sister was in the hospital for another day before the spells would heal her well enough to return to school and life in general, and her adoptive son was, in her own thoughts, ‘as horrible and uncouth as when she’d met him’.

It hadn’t helped that she’d only spent less than two hours with him in the real world, his dream not accounting. In that time they’d done little to endear one another, and the rest of the week was going to be unpleasant if they couldn’t come to an understanding.

“So, Snickers, what would you like for lunch?”

“Cram it.” He replied while watching the dust his hooves kicked up.

Rarity looked aside and back to him. “That’s uncalled for, I was simply asking-”

He kicked some road dirt at her legs. “It was a canned dinner where I was really from. ‘Cram it, the food you can eat.’” He said in a sing-song tone.

“Oh… well, I don’t know if I’d call that a jingle that would speak to ponies, but perhaps you can tell me what was in this cram it you speak of and I can replicate it?”

“Hog jowels, poultry innards, soylent puree, gel from beef joints, ascorbic acids, a little fruit zest, some--”

“Bleh! Please, darling… stop right there before I lose my breakfast,” Rarity stopped, he was smiling a little. “Are you pulling my tail?” she asked him suspiciously.

He shrugged. “Only one of the things I said isn’t really in there, so far.”

She thought it over and retched into her covered mouth. Her hoof was seeing a lot of use halting her vomiting noises from getting too out of control. Rarity looked to a bush and thought about playing the act to its fullest, short of actually vomitting, but chose not to. She grabbed Snickers in her magic and moved him onto her back.

“Your hooves are damaged enough. No more, we’re taking you to Hay Burger to get something in your tummy, then to the spa where I can show you a hint of luxury that you seem to be missing. Perhaps it will be exactly what you need to relax.”

And maybe fall into a more manageable role as a colt, the little charlatan you are. Adult and electici… civil engineering… gah, I haven’t the energy to ask him of this nonsense.

He tried to scratch her sides with his hooves to no luck, since he’d managed to only scuff the fronts, he didn’t want to bite her since it would lead to more trouble than he was willing, and he wasn’t physically violent, and he didn’t have to relieve himself since he did that before they left the hospital.

After fifteen seconds, he gave up and rested his jaw on her mane. “Turn left through this alley and we’ll get to the burger joint 17 seconds sooner. That’s more time you can spa yourself,” he said flatly. Rarity looked at her path and then looked down the alley. It was a risk, a terrible one, but she had to be the bigger pony.

She chose to humor him and turned, entering the shrouded space between buildings. Her horn lit and she brought light to the refuse of their hamlet, garbage cans lidded with flies buzzing around them, a group of rodents peeked at her from behind one and she hurried her pace. A box with wet stains on it, a trail of something leaking leading away from it caught her eye.

The tail hairs left around the box shocked Rarity and drove her desire to leave the alley as well as confront a mare she knew about her sexual safety. The last straw for Rarity’s not so casual trot through the alleyway was a used condom unrolled to its fullest that a snake was currently wearing.

Snickers laughed and held on while Rarity screamed and galloped from the alley and into a group of mares. Snickers fell off Rarity, laughing while over some mare that pushed him off her and started helping the others up while Rarity panted on the ground, whimpering. “What’s your problem, Rarity?”

Rarity looked up and saw a maroon mare and climbed to her hooves. “Ah, I’m sorry, Cherilee. I was taking a shortcut and…” she hesitated and remembered what she’d seen. “By chance, have you been down that alley in the past few hours?”

Cherilee gulped and looked between her friends, who were losing their frustration and listening to the potential gossip. Cherilee shook her head. “N-nope. Alleys aren’t the kind of place for a pony to travel through, right, girls?” Her friends nodded and glanced at the darkened crevice.

“Right,” Rarity said, then noticed Snickers looking at Cherilee’s tail. “Snickers, don’t--”

“Your tail’s covered with sticky milk, Miss Cherilee. Is it taffy, can I taste it?” Snickers asked with the innocence of a colt slightly younger than himself. The mare turned her tail and herself quickly away from him blushing quickly.

“No! It’s not… something a colt your age should concern yourself with.”

A tan mare sniffed the teacher’s tail and giggled. “Oh… I think it’s more than just taffy in your tail.”

One of the other mares grinned and moved toward the other. “What? Let me see!”

“N-o, it’s nothing! Just something totally not a problem that any of you should--” Cherilee turned away from her friends and felt a tug on her tail. Followed by a ‘bleh’ sound.

“Ew, it’s salty taffy. Gross!”

Cherilee froze in place and her two friends looked behind her to the little innocent colt that was frowning at Cherilee’s tail and sticking his tongue out. They both turned their eyes to her and narrowed them. Cherilee glanced between her friends and then turned, running past Rarity into the alley.

Her friends ran to the edge of the shadows and growled at the vanished mare. “Can you believe her, walking around with a sticky tail?”

The mares turned back onto their path like nothing had happened but new gossip. “And to let a colt nibble at it? Who was the lucky stallion, you smelled her last?!”

“Oh, this’ rich. It was--”

Snickers felt a tug on his ear before he could hear who. “Snickers,” Rarity chided him, “please tell me you didn’t actually do it. Did you?”

He cocked his head to the side and let one ear fall. “Do what, Miss Rarity?”

“Don’t you dare give me that innocent foal nonsense…”

He snickered and shook his head. “Ew, I’d rather eat dirt that risk putting anything from some guy in my mouth. I’m like my 5th leg,” he started and Rarity closed his mouth.

“Very well, as long as you didn’t actually put your lips on her… mess, then you’re in the clear. Let’s get you that burger before anything else happens.”

She let his mouth go and moved just past him. “I act floppy until I get by a mare, then I’m straight as an arrow.”

She turned back to him and glared, her tail swished but was still flat and in need of a new styling and trim, curled just enough at the end to keep it off the ground. He was inappropriate, but something about what he’d said still got her tail to swish against her better control. “Silence, or I’ll skip the fries with your meal.”

He motioned zipping his mouth closed and was again put onto her back. “Snickers, I know a mare than can really zip your lips closed, I suggest you watch what you say.”

Snickers hummed for a second. “If she can zip lips closed, then you’ll have the same chances at getting laid regardless. Nothing lo-Ah!”

She picked him up with her magic and held him upside down in front of her, almost to the entrance of the restaurant. “We’re taking a detour, now.”

Snickers whimpered childishly and reached for the restaurant as he was carried beside Rarity. “But, I was being honest. Isn’t that a virtue you were talking about before? I’m loyal to my jokes and I was being generous by sharing them in the kindest way… it was just for a laugh; in the name of Harmony.”

Rarity growled and cantered as quickly as she could to Twilight’s. She knocked on the door softly and let herself in. “Twilight, are you in?”

“Right here, Rarity.” A mountain of books answered. It shifted and several slid from the top, spinning end over end to the floor without any damage done.

“Whatever are you doing in there, darling?”

Twilight stepped out from an opening and smiled awkwardly. “I was looking for a book, then when I couldn’t find it I started stacking them, then as I went they just got higher and higher, then Spike came over and we reminiced about the past, and then we made Fortress Book, an upgraded version of my book fort from when I was a filly… don’t laugh,” Twilight finished and used a forehoof to slide a fallen book front to back on the floor.

Snickers turned and struck out, barely grazing Rarity’s horn and then falling when the magic faded. “That’s awesome! I want in,” he ran under Twilight, his mane tickling her underbelly and getting her to jump before his tail could get her. He ran inside and Spike shortly after. There were a pair of shouts just before the fortress rocked and fell in an avalanche of the written and printed word.

There were a few seconds of silence before Spike’s hand broke the surface and, in dramatic fashion, pulled himself free with Snickers’ limp body behind him. They tumbled down the side and Spike picked up Snickers in his arms, reaching one to the sky. “Why? Why must they be taken so young from the mortal coils of the earth?”

A small book bounced off his head and back into the pile. “Stop playing around, Spike, and clean this mess up.”

Snickers rolled from Spike’s arms and was standing faster than Rarity could react. Spike snorted black smoke. “What?! You made this mess, too.”

“But you’re my number one assistant, you were in it when it fell, and I have to greet my friend and her new colt.”

Spike looked at Snickers, then to Rarity, then back to the colt, sizing him up. “So, this’ Rarity’s colt, huh? Not much of a tough guy, are you?” he gave Snickers a little shove with a challenging smirk.

“I’m more tough than you. What’s your name again? Wimpy?”

“Psh, you wish you half as tough as me. See these,” Spike flexed his claws, “these’re like unicorn magic, more than your teeth anyday.”

One of the mares spoke up. “Spike…”

Snickers snapped his teeth loudly. “Bet you I can do more with these chompers than you can.”

“Snickers…”

Spike took the challenge by sliding his claws together, making a cracking sound. “You’re on. First one to ten?”

Snickers huffed. “Ten is for babies. Fifty.”

“On three,” Spike called and started.

Rarity and Twilight stood side by side, wondering what the boys were going to do; both ready with their magic to stop them if this challenge was dangerous. Spike counted down and when they started, neither mare expected to see the challenge being putting books away. The unicorns looked between one another, then at the galloping colt and running baby dragon.

“How’d they know…” both mares started at the same time, then tittered and left the room to make tea.

Snickers grabbed his fourth book in his mouth and ran to the nearest shelf, turned his head, pushed in into place, and returned to the pile to grab another. Spike panted, but still gloated. “I’m at seven, what about you?”

“Ahm ach fah.”

“Ha, claws are best! When I win, I think I’ll have you buy me a sapphire vanilla ice cream.”

Snickers didn’t know what that meant, but he surmised it was a local ice cream flavor. He put another book away. “Yeah, right. When I win, you’re gonna have to help me prank Rarity.”

Spike growled quietly. “No way, I’m not letting you do anything to her.”

“Yeah, then you better win. I’m not quitting and,” Snickers grabbed another book in his mouth, but didn’t hold it as tightly so he could talk, “I’ll prank her anyway, but help would make it easier.”

Spike had stopped running and was facing the still moving colt. He held a book to his chest and started talking wistfully. “You’d better not, she’s the most beautiful, wonderful mare in the whole world. There’s no creature that’s ever been more generous and kind hearted to walk--”

A book collided with his muzzle, stopping his reverie.

ooo

Take a seat, Rarity. Tell me what’s been happening? You look stressed again.”

“Darling, you weren’t there… Snickers accepted Harmony--”

Twilight turned to Rarity and clapped her hooves on the floor.“That’s wonderful! Did he sing a song, or was he a rare ‘marker’? Oh, just imagine if he got is mark in front of the CMC.”

“Twilight, it was nothing of the sort. Something... went wrong.”

Twilight set the teapot on the counter and stared at Rarity. “W-wrong? Harmony is almost as perfect as Princess Celesia, it doesn’t make mistakes.”

“Well, this time the whole world was broken!” Rarity nearly shouted, closed her eyes, took a couple breaths, then began again. “Twilight, Harmony typically works by showing what a pony’s life would be like after they follow the path to join our society in some way.”

“Yeah, are you saying it didn’t happen that way?”

Rarity slouched and lay her head on the table, a small napkin as a cushion. “He’s troubled, as I said. When Harmony showed him what he had to gain, he saw it as everything, everything, he had lost to get there. Appearantly, he’d spent two or so years with Sweetie and I in some wasteland.”

Twilight covered her mouth with her hooves. “No.”

“Yes, it seemingly took him two years in this fantasy to become family with us enough to accept harmony, then he awakens to find out all our bonding was, to him, a lie.”

Twilight sat beside Rarity at the table. “How was it not a lie, in his opinion?”

“Twilight, you have to understand,” Rarity sat and looked intently at her purple friend, “there was a moment where he was so broken and distraught that I would have been in tears had he reacted differently. He had visions of me losing my hair, Sweetie gaining her mark while helping me escape from some kind of zoo, or something.

“There was a terror in his eyes when he realized everything wasn’t as he’d been shown. He’d broken before me and when next I saw him I’d… oh, Twilight, I was wearing the most darling shoes I had saved for such special an occasion. There was this awful nurse who completely overreacted and I had to give them to her.

“Twilight, you just don’t understand the horror of having to give away such a wonderful set of custom shoes to a mare who doesn’t deserve them in the slightest.”

“Rarity, is this about Snickers?” Twilight asked to get her friends back on topic.

“Oh, well, not exactly, but he was there and it reminded me of my loss.”

“It’s okay… wait, what’s that sound?” Both mares listened and several thumps passed, then a yelp and growl. They both ran from the room and into the living room to see the boys fighting. It was a scene they’d never imagined and both mares grabbed their respective sons, pulling them away from one another.

Rarity pulled Snickers to her and lay him on the floor, standing over him while Spike was pressed against a bookshelf, a feral gleam in his eyes while fire seemed to spill from his maw like thick lava. Twilight stayed back and shouted. “Spike?! What’s gotten into you?” He didn’t respond, his eyes on the colt he’d scorched. A book slapped Spike hard across the face. “Wake up!”

“Gyah, what… what happened?”

“Spikey, you were unhinged, darling!” Rarity stepped back to show Snickers to Spike, hoping that the dragon would feel badly for what he’d done. Instead, Spike brandished his claws with a hiss. “That’s it, we’re leaving. Twilight, thank you for visiting with me, but these two are at odds and I can’t have this at the moment.”

Rarity picked Snickers onto her back and ran to the door, finally hearing Spike talk to her. “Rarity, don’t go. I have to show you how much better I can clean that he does!”

Mind Off Matters

Rarity shook her head without looking back and left, closing the door after her. The warm air was a nice change from the scent of dragon breath and burning wood. She looked at Snickers and the mark along his side that was bald and blistering slightly. Her horn lit and the glow covered his wound, healing it quickly and regrowing some hair.

She shushed him and took him down a nearby street, sat him down in some grass, and lay beside him. “What in Celesia’s name was that?” she asked coldly. “I’ve never seen little Spike so upset, what did you do?”

Snickers pouted and scuffed the soil. “I… I just said I was gonna prank you. He went on this whole ‘Rarity’s a true Goddess’ thing and I tossed a book at him like Twinkle did, to get a laugh. Then he spat a fucking spitwad of fire at me and I went at him with a wicked right hook that took him down, then he slashed at me and I kinda slipped and didn’t get stabbed. Then you came and here we are.”

Rarity lowered her snout to the grass and inhaled, hoping the green scent of grass would clear her mind from the nonsense she was living in. “So, Spike spoke highly of me and you attacked him?”

“What?! No, you’re not listening to me. He spit green lava at me, I could’ve been killed!”

“Only after you threw a book at him, regardless of what Twilight had to say about it being funny or not.”

He sat up tall and glared at her. “You won’t believe me no matter what I say, you only care about that jerk dragon! Well, fine. Fuck you again!” he dug his hooves into the soil and kicked them at Rarity, getting her eyes lightly coated with dirt. When she screamed and looked away he got up and ran off again. “Fuck this place, and fuck you, fuck you, fuck you!” he shouted at mares as he passed getting typical reactions.

Wing flaps matched his pace and a shadow covered him. “Hey, what’s with the shouting? I could hear you from my cloud.”

“Fuck off!” he shouted and turned a corner, trying to lose the fastest flier around. Her shadow stayed over him, making him madder as he went on. Finally he skidded to a stop by the town fountain. He leapt in and ducked under. Rainbow settled on top and looked down at him with a smirk. She knocked on the statue a couple times, then he came up for air.

“Hey, sport. You know this isn’t for bathing, right?” she asked, he’d dunked back under before she finished, but she still smiled and began knocking on the statue in a rhythmic beat, beatboxing to the tones she made. He came up for air again. “What’re you trying to do, hiding in a public fountain?”

He glared at her and inhaled another deep breath. He dunked under and she resumed her tune making. Nearly a minute passed, then he broke from the water and shook her head. “Would you fucking stop that?!”

Rainbow glided around the fountain and landed on the edge. “Stop what? I’m just wasting time, like you’re doing.”

“You’re banging all over the whole fountain! I can hear it in my fucking bones and you’re… just… so annoying!” he screamed. He splashed water at her and she didn’t move. “Why won’t you just go away and leave me alone? Why can’t you be like everyone else and just abandon me to take care of myself?”

“Dude,” Rainbow leaned over him, “I’ll never let a friend go, especially when they need me. You know,” she sat and dipped her hind hooves in the water, “I didn’t even know you were some troubled kid when we met. I thought you were just some punk that needed a minute with a mare to remind you that awesome still exists.

“I showed you that portal thing because I didn’t think you’d ever be around here again and you’d forget in a day. But you taught me one thing since I met you yesterday.”

“What’s that? That I’m a total loser fuck up?”

She snerked and giggled. “No, that you’re fucked up, dude.” She ignored the gasps around them. “Whatever happened to you, I’ve gotta help you learn it isn’t your fault and that you’re life here is what you need to focus on.

“It doesn’t matter if you were a serial killer or you had to watch some ritual sacrifices like in Daring Do and the Curse of the Yellow Blood, you’re here now and none of that’s gonna happen ever again,” she climbed into the water and shoved him aside so she could sit beside him, even though there wasn’t a reason to do so.

“Look, kid, you talk like you’re tough shit. I’ve known plenty of mares that’ve been the same way, especially after everything crashed around them and they were lost and alone, kinda like you are now. A hug and some candy doesn’t fix them, and I know it won’t fix you. You’re like me, Snickers. You don’t need that sappy stuff, you need a good wrestle and fight to get your mind off the moment.

“You need a drink of good aged cider and a smoke of giggle grass. Hell, if you were old enough I’d do all that and get you laid… but you’re not, which sucks,” she winked at him and he looked away with a little blush, “but what I can give you is a pony to be real with, none of that Fluttershy sappy time, and a chance to do what a real colt should be doing.”

“Yeah? What’s that supposed to be?”

She looked past him and focused her attention on something. He followed her gaze and was shoved under water. He got to his hooves and was about to ask why she’d done that when his forelegs were pulled from under him and he went back under. At first he was curious, after the fifth time he was furious; trying to bite and swing at Rainbow, then at the ninth time he started to laugh.

He got her pattern and when he went under he was able to grab one of her legs and pull her under, climbed over her, and hopped out of the water using her rump as a springboard. When Rainbow came up, coughing water, he laughed and ran away, looking back over himself to make sure she was chasing him.

They played and rough housed for an hour, finally ending just a block away by a residence with a lot of tomatoes growing around it. They were wet with sweat, sticky from dirt that had gotten on them and dried, tugging at their coats, and happy. Rainbow was on his back, holding him to the grass while using her wings to slap his sides and her forelegs tapped his ears, snout, and head.

They laughed and ponies passed them, happy to see anypony having fun. “Say it, kid.”

“No!” he giggled and squirmed.

“Say it and I’ll stop!” Rainbow shouted and her wings stopped against his sides in warning.

“Never, I’ll never break!” He replied firmly.

They both stayed still, waiting for the next move. Snickers started giggling and screaming when four of Rainbow’s six limbs started tickling him across his exposed sides and neck. He kicked and tried to twist free, finally screaming ‘auntie’ several times to get her to stop.

“I didn’t hear that, was that ‘auntie’, or ‘mount me’? Because they mean different things!” Rainbow shouted over his screeching.

“A-u-n-tee!” Snickers managed finally. Rainbow flapped and hovered over him.

“I thought you were too tough to give in, it only took me half an hour to take you down.”

He shakily moved to a sitting position, eyes watching her, ready to react if she tried to tickle him again. He only had one plan if she did; scream and try to get away since he was defenseless against her in every way. Not that he’d admit it. “Psh, more like two hours. I thought you were way more awesome than that, but whatever.”

Rainbow grinned like a winner of a difficult race. “You know what?”

He scooted back, grinning against his will. “What?”

Rainbow waved a hoof at him. “You haven’t said a single bad word since we started, have you?” When he didn’t respond, she moved and bonked his head. “You don’t need to be mean or anything, you just need to have more fun. You’ve met the CMC, right?”

He looked around him, finally seeing the ponies in the street looking at them as they passed, and Pinkie Pie in a lawn chair with a tub of popcorn a block away watching them. She waved when he saw her and then held up a foam finger that had ‘1 Hour!’ written on it. He shook his head. “Yeah, I’m in their club now.”

“Cool, then go hang out with them, okay?”

“Why? You’re here.”

“Because I have a job and you can’t help me bust clouds or manage the weather. The CMC are your age, they’re rough and adventurous, and basically everything you need when you’re getting upset or down.”

Snickers looked to where Pinkie was, only she was gone. “What about when they can’t hang out? They’ve got school and stuff, Rarity has her whatever, what about me?”

“I can help with that!” Pinkie picked him up and tossed him into the air with a silent scream from the colt. She caught him and in a single turn held him like a baby in her forelegs. “I’ll hug him and love him and pet him and name him George!” Snickers looked at her smiling face and curled into himself in fear. Pinkie remembered that he didn’t like her being super close or happy around him and let him go, hopping back. “Sorry, I forgot.”

Rainbow picked Snickers up and onto his hooves, dusting him off with her tail when she passed him. “What was that, Pinkie? I thought you were gonna be chill around him?”

Pinkie took a bashful look. “I kinda forgot. But, not again. I Pinkie Promise to be tamer around Snickers and not scare any bodily fluids or squeaky noises out of him unless his life is in jeopardy or I have to do it. Cross my heart, hope to fly. Stick a cupcake in my eye.”

Snickers had backed behind Rainbow and was looking around her flank to watch Pinkie. Pinkie lowered herself. “I’m really sorry, can I give you a ponyback ride back to Rarity? I helped her clean her eyes and after she was done screaming and fighting she went back home to dry herself and redo her mane and makeup.

“Snickers, do you know what a Juggalo is? Well, she looks just like one of those when she gets all wet on her face… see, Rainbow, how I covered that opening so he couldn’t get in it?” She sat up and swayed her foreleg. “Shoot, so close,” she said when Rainbow and Snickers started to giggle.

Back to Carousel

Pinkie knocked on the door and let herself into Rarity’s shop. “Rarity, are you home? I brought you a snack… a Snickers.” Pinkie’s head bobbled when Snickers playfully slapped it. Rainbow was close behind and repeated the action on Snickers, who mimicked Pinkie, getting a chuckle from the flying mare.

“I’m in my bathroom, I'm a bit busy in here. Have you found Snickers? I can’t hear very well, come up here, please?”

Pinkie pronked to the stairs sending Snickers into the air to be caught by Rainbow. Rainbow set him down and they followed Pinkie to the bathroom. Pinkie opened the door and steam billowed out like heavy fog that smelled of orchids and made all their mouths water, Snickers’ stomach cramped and he remembered missing lunch.

“Come in, darling. Have you found Snickers? I know it may not seem so, but I’m quite worried about him.”

“Well, worry no more because here he is!” Pinkie turned impossibly and grabbed him, then turned him to the source of the fog, the closed shower. She pushed him into the stall and let him go.

Rarity screamed shrilly and somewhere on the street just outside the boutique a foal cried from the sound sending its mother back into her depressive cycle. “Snickers, why’re you in the shower with me?”

He blinked up and saw her underbelly and looked a little further back, cocking his head. “Hey, you found Mister Ed!”

In another rare feat, Mister Ed again vanished in a teleport. She shuddered and nearly fell on him in the second following, then glared down at him between her forelegs. “Out!” she picked him up and moved him from the stall dripping muddy water from his body onto the floor, where she placed him. She groaned and the silhouette showed her bury her face in her hooves.

Rainbow was snickering into her hooves while Pinkie had climbed the far side of the shower and was peeking over with wide eye. “Can I have a turn?” Pinkie asked. Rarity screamed again in surprise and Pinkie was grabbed, the window opened, and Pinkie was flung through it.

“No!” she shouted as the window closed. Again, Rarity screamed when Pinkie’s silhouette appeared behind her in the shower stall. Rainbow landed and started guffawing, slapping the floor with her forehoof. “How did you… can I please shower in peace?!”

Snickers climbed back in, his hind legs kicking the side of the shower until Rainbow gave him a nudge in an awkward place for him. “Hey, this thing fits three easy… just like you.” Snickers barked a laugh when he saw Rarity’s eye twitching and Pinkie behind her lathering her own mane.

“Ooo, sudsy shampoo!”

Rarity whined and opened the curtain, climbing out to bump muzzles with Rainbow. “So, how was your shower?” Rainbow snerked. “Very fulfilling?” Rainbow's eyebrows wiggled and Rarity blushed, moving past Rainbow to grab a few towels. Rarity used her magic to pat her coat dry with them while two wrapped her mane and one wrapped her tail.

“Rainbow, I have one thing to say that I’m sure you’ll understand better than anypony I’ve ever known.”

Rainbow’s ear flicked. The two in the shower were actually cleaning themselves and one another, leaving the two of them to share this moment. Rarity used her magic to move her tail aside and broke wind, then left the room. Rainbow was frozen in place, unsure of how to take the action she was exposed to.

Should she laugh, maybe. Should she make a comment, probably. As it was, she just watched the mare leave the room and sat on her flank. “Huh… that happened.” The sounds from the shower got her attention and she looked to see Pinkie holding Snickers with her mane curls. “Hey, I’m gonna head out, you two gonna be okay?”

“You betcha, don’t be a stinker and visit me later.”

Rainbow chuckled quietly, the memory flashed in her mind of what had just happened. “Okay… don’t take this the wrong way, but I think Snickers is rubbing off on Rarity.”

Snickers’ head popped from the shower curtain. “Not until she’s asleep!” Pinkie pulled him back in and the whole group laughed.

Rarity stood outside the bathroom door, a smile on her muzzle. Rainbow flew from the window, the shower ended almost a minute later, and Rarity went to her room to find Mister Ed under her covers. She looked at the bathroom, bit her lip, then rushed into her room and locked the door. A glow shone and there was silence from the room thereafter.

Pinkie helped dry Snickers and wrung her mane out, drying it in one motion. Her tail, she bounded on it and all the water squeezed out of it. Snickers watched with awe but didn’t ask, he realized that she was an enigma and he liked her like this. “So, you got me back here. Now what’re you gonna do?”

“Well, my schedule’s free for a while, so maybe hang out with you?” Snickers looked at Pinkie and the hope in her eyes. Her eyes. He shivered and looked away. “Why do you do that? Hate my eyes and smile?”

He shook his head. “It doesn’t matter. I just do.”

“But… I can’t make you smile if you don’t like me. All of me, what can I do to make it better?” She pulled a paper bag from her tail and stuck it on her head. It had a ‘meh’ face drawn on it with small eyeholes.

“No, it’s not that. It’s just…” he started walking to his room and noticed the glow around Rarity’s room door. “Yeah, go for it, Mama! Er… Rarity.”

Pinkie looked at him intently from behind, catching what he’d said and how he meant it. A small smile grew into a grin under the bag as she realized Harmony had worked, he just wasn’t accepting it like he should have.

They went into his room and closed the door, Pinkie sitting on her tail, bouncing slightly. Snickers looked at her bouncing, shaking his head. “Look there was this guy that called himself President Lord. Everywhere, he’d have his cronies put up these posters with his name at the top and bottom. President, Lord.

“He was full of it, but I got a job working for him and I fell asleep on my shift once. I was locked in a room with his face painted on every wall. Giant eyes to see the future, a bright grin like The Joker to show how happy he’d make people. It was terrifying to look at and that’s all there was for maybe a whole day. I got a toilet, at least.

“But, whenever I messed up against his vision of the future, that was where I went. A few hours, a day; didn’t matter. Those eye and that smile,” Snickers shuddered and looked away from the bouncing mare.

Pinkie giggled and hopped to her hooves. “Silly colt, I’m not lord of anything or president, either. Except Lord… or is it Lordess? Well, that of sweet yummies! And President of Cupcakes with Unique Flavors Anonymous. We only have one member, but it’s a growing movement.”

Snickers shook his head again, this time at her antics. “You’re so random… but I kinda like that.”

Pinkie took the bag off her head and was looking sad. “So, can you try to like my smile? Maybe a little?”

He shrugged. “Perhaps, as long as you keep it within reason,” he said before she could perform an impossible grin. She stopped at a normal sized grin and reached to hug him.

“Oh, thank you, Snickers. I’ll make you so happy you’ll wonder how you ever went a day with me and not been happy.” He patted her leg and she let him go. He inhaled a deep breath.

“Yeah, but I gotta ask. What makes you so happy? Drugs, it’s drugs, isn’t it?”

She shook her head and started bouncing on her tail again. “Nopers, it’s something no pony’s every guessed and it’s just a little part of why I am who I am,” she giggled, “so, what’re we gonna play?” He looked her over and watched her closely as she bounced. He giggled, then laughed until he fell over. “Oh, a joke? I like to hear jokes! Can you tell it to me?”

She bounced closer and waited. “I know why your rump is in your tail when you bounce!”

Pinkie looked side to side and slid off her tail, shaking it a little. “What? I dunno what you’re talking about, heh heh… say, if you’re not in the mood to play, I totally get it so I’m just gonna go,” she ran to the closet and shut the door. He got up and ran to it, opened it ready to tease her, only to find it empty of everything except a couple dressed and a tie.

He moved back and looked around the room. “What a random mare. I wonder if she really had her own version of Mister Ed in her tail,” he snickered and shook his head. “This world is so sexual and practically open about it. What next, sex in the streets and alley… ways,” he snorted and fogged the window pane he was looking through.

“Okay, so sex is normal and not taboo. Butt marks happen, what next?” He asked and felt the house tremble. “I swear, if that’s some kind of bear insect hybrid I’m building a nuke and bombing something.”

He listened and after a few seconds gave up on whatever it was. He went to his bed, lay down, and sank into the comfort of a real mattress. He heard Rarity’s door open and she hummed a happy tune to herself, walking around to the bathroom. “Ah, my darling son! How was your shower with Pinkie Pie?”

He grinned at her. “Nice, how was your time with Mister Ed?”

She blushed but waved it off. “Fine enough, I’ve had some stress over the past week and for the moment, it’s gone and forgotten. As I recall, you missed lunch, would you care to join me for a snack? I’ve developed a bit of a ravishing hunger.”

He nodded and moved from the bed, getting a giggle from Rarity. “It seems you forgot your outfit and are showing. If you’d like I can make you a skirt to hold you over until I make you a new one.”

He blushed, shaking his head. “Nah, that Harmony thing kinda helped with that, ma. I’m okay being naked.”

Rarity’s ears rose high and she grinned at him. “Did I hear you correctly?”

“What?” Snickers asked with a twitching ear.

She smiled at him cockily. “You called me ‘ma’, did you not?”

“No, wh-why w-would I d-do that?” Snickers stuttered.

She hummed and turned her side to him. “Only Harmony knows why, I’m sure.” Snickers tried to become angry, but he’d been burnt out on hate for a while. Care for a ponyback ride to the kitchen?”

He gulped and looked at her back, then his little legs, then back to her again. He nodded and she crouched; with a hop to the floor, he trotted to her and climbed onto her back. “To lunch, Jeeves.”

Rarity gave her best Bucklyn accent that still crossed over hers. “Ah, yeah, buddy. That’d be five bits, nyea.”

They shared a laugh.

Dinner

The rest of the night went well for them both; with Rarity in a much better mood and Snickers knowing that he was in a sexually open society, they both seemed to have come to terms with aspects of the situation. After a small lunch to hold him over until supper, Rarity sewed him a new outfit he only wore the front of, claiming it was even better than the last since using the toilet was at best inconvinient with everything covered.

Supper was a new experience for him, being served an actual meal of baked fish with vegetables and rice and a small glass of wine that Rarity shared with him. He cleaned his plate and while drinking his second glass of wine, the limit she said he’d have in a meal, he told her about his time with Rainbow.

“Well, I must say that your day has been full of experiences. I, myself, can honestly say I’ve never been held down and had a garden hose held over my face while Pinkie Pie washes my eyes out, but now I can add that to my list of things Pinkie has done that she shouldn’t have. She does know pony eyes are quite durable, being one of the largest parts of our bodies and always exposed as they are.”

Snickers flinched. “Yeah, that’s pretty gross. When I saw a chart at the doctor’s office when I was picked up last week, she told me about pony anatomy and I freaked out when I learned that pony eyes are plates and our pupils just slide around just below the surface. One inch thick so our brains have space… so fucked up.”

Rarity hummed in thought. “You know, I think it’s time I get you a swear jar. Beginning at that last word, you’re owing one bit. It may not seem like much, but when you can’t buy your treats and your friends stop buying them for you, you’re going to want to stop adding money to the jar,” she turned in her seat and her magic glowed on two cupboards pulling out a jar and lid. A knife stabbed through the lid and replaced itself in a cutting block, then she screwed the lit tight.

Rarity placed the jar between them on the table and her horn glowed brightly surrounding the jar. “There, now you can’t break it by normal means, if you try to open it I’ll know, and you can’t shake any out, if you get that clever idea.” Rarity levitated one bit from her saddle bags in the next room and with a plink sound, dropped it into the jar.

“You are allowanced eight bits a week, should you swear them all, then you’ll have extra chores or duties to make up for them. Do you have any questions?”

Snickers looked in the jar and reached for it. Rarity nodded that he could take it, then Snickers lifted it over his head and threw it at the floor. It bounced once and rolled to the far wall. “Huh, nope. Nothing to add, you know your stuff.”

Rarity brought the jar back to the table. “Yes, everypony I make these for do that first. None have broken one and I’ve yet to hear of one breaking. It’s not a challenge I make, but a fact I state,” Rarity giggled. “That rhymed.” Snickers downed the last of his wine and slipped from the chair onto the floor, swaying slightly. “Oh, my. Are you not used to drinking? I was under the impression you were…”

“I was, but not as a pony,” he took a step and sat down, leaning to the side before falling over. “Heh, drunk off a thimble. If Mike could see me now.”

Rarity picked him up and placed him on her back. “Well, whoever Mic is, I’m certain they’re not a good influence for you if they encouraged you to drink at your age.”

Snickers patted her side. “I wasn’t a colt always, lady.”

“Oh, Lady, is it? What about yesterday when you said I wasn’t one?” Rarity snarked back.

“I don’t remember what you’re talking about, but you gotta nice butt,” he made a hiss sound, “sways like the trees by the ocean. If I was ten years older,” Snickers giggled and snorted.

Rarity rolled her eyes. “If you were ten years older you’d be older than me, and still probably wouldn’t have a chance. You, young colt, are on half rations for wine until you gain tolerance. It’s off to bed for you, I’ll have to check on Sweetie tomorrow with you. First, before you go to bed you must use the toilets and in your state I’ll accept nothing else.”

“Awe, but mo~m, I don’t gotta go,” Snickers whined.

A grin tugged Rarity’s lips until they stung. “Oh, certainly you can manage. I’ll even give you your privacy, as long as you don’t slip as Sweetie did.”

“Psh, I dun gotta squatta pee,” Snickers yawned and she felt him slacking on her back.

“Now, now. We’re nearly to the bathroom, then you can do your business and go to bed in your own bed.”

He was nearly asleep, the alcohol taking its toll faster than Rarity thought it would since he started swaying. Snickers whined and hugged her neck. “I wanna sleep with you.”

Rarity placed him standing over the toilet. “Well, perhaps in the future. Tonight your bed is only for you, darling. Now, hurry and go so I can take you to bed.” Snickers blearily looked at where he was then went, flushing with the press of a pedal. He stumbled back and Rarity turned around. “Oh, darling, what’s wrong?”

Snickers was pouting and trying to keep his eyes open. “I’m sorry,” he looked at Rarity, “please tell Sweetie I’m sorry. I’ll never hurt her again, and I’ll be a good nephew and brother and I’ll keep her safe forever, just like I promised in Harmony.”

“Aw, that’s so sweet of you to say. Okay, up you go,” Rarity carried him to his room and turned down his bed, tucked him in, and gave him a kiss on his forehead after brushing his forelocks out of the way. She remembered a moment later and slid his shirt off leaving him naked and asleep in his bed. “And that’s that… May the sweetest dreams find you.”

She left the room and turned off the light, leaving the door open a crack so she could peek in on him if need be. With that, Rarity returned to the kitchen and cleaned up, her evening winding down herself she retired to the showroom, lay on her duvet, and began to read new fashion magazines from national distributors.

Morning Joe

Rarity sipped her tea while Snickers ate a small balanced equine breakfast. “Snickers?”

“Yeah?” He replied after swallowing some egg he’d eaten.

Rarity sipped her tea. “I was wondering… what was your dream about last night?”

“Oh, uh…” Snickers took another fork of shredded hay to chew over, buying time. “Well, it was just a bad dream. Everyone has them, no biggie.”

Rarity’s tea cup lowered to the saucer with a quiet clink. She inhaled and exhaled, exuding a calm and collective mare’s mindset. “I understand the principal, however you awoke in quite a fright. When I reached you, it was as though you were fighting a creature for all your worth. Would you mind telling me?”

Snickers gulped loudly, meeting her eyes. He shook his head oh so slightly getting a sharp, short exhale from Rarity. “Very well,” Rarity said lifting her teacup to her lips, “if you change your mind, I am always here to listen. On another note, I won’t be working until after lunch today. My sister and her friends typically arrive here at one for snacks before they go have their fun.

“However, with Sweetie indisposed, if you’d be willing, I’d like to take you to see Sweetie around that time and let you spend time with your club mates.” Snickers scooped a bunch of oats into his mouth and chewed loudly, offering a nod. “Well, then that’s lunch through supper set,” she said with a little more cheer in her voice. “I trust you to follow their example as you’re still unfamiliar with the area.

“My only caveat is that you use your better judgement and try to keep them out of danger, mud, muck, and any form of sticky substances such as honey, various syrups, and saps. Can you at least do your best with my little request?”

Snickers nodded. “Yeah, I can do that. Do you know if… um, Fluttershy or Rainbow are gonna be around today?”

Rarity looked out of the nearby window and her features relaxed. “Darling, they’re always here when they’re needed.”

...

After a rough few minutes of mane and tail brushing, Snickers was ready to head out into the world. He donned his shirt again, making sure it was clean and spiffy while Rarity slipped shoes on her hooves that were nowhere near as nice as the ones she’d given away.

Taking an Apple family treat for each of them to snack on when they got hungry later from the basket gifted to her days prior, Snickers and Rarity left the boutique and stood outside the door taking in the warm morning air. The magic of Harmony’s effect on Snickers was still gaining traction, little by little, but he remembered living in a wasteland with Rarity and Sweetie as a real thing and it was conflicting within him.

Snickers shifted his forelegs in his blue and white shirt, making sure it sat right on his withers.

“Snickers,” Rarity started, “would you like to get that cafe?”

“Sure, sounds good. It’s that way, right?” Snickers pointed down the road.

Rarity tutted him. “A gentlecolt doesn’t point, darling. Look or speak the direction.”

Snickers snorted hot air. “Well, is it to the left?”

“No, dear. It’s actually to the right and then left three blocks from here. Follow along, now.”

Snickers’s eyebrows furrowed. “Are you gonna be teaching me to act like some stuffy snob noble from now on? ‘Cause I’m gonna have a problem with that real quick.”

Rarity shook her head. “There’s nothing wrong with having some class, Snickers. Class, not crass; you must learn the difference. A gentle stallion you’ll be someday, and when that happens you’ll actually walk beside me with a slight lead and to the right. Now, since you’re still young, you should stay around my flank and to the left.”

“Why, what’s the big deal with where I walk?” Snickers asked while looking around him from pony to pony and seeing a mare with a hat pulling a cart of apples down a street.

“Well,” Rarity paused to think of how to explain, “in many cities, until about fifty years ago, didn’t have plumbing and would go in buckets in their domiciles.” She shuddered. “Then, they’d dump said buckets from their windows or doors into the back alleys or, Celestia forbid,” she gagged at the thought, “onto the street when upper class ponies walked by to show their distaste.”

Snickers grinned. “Nice, can I try that?”

“Certainly not! Why would you even…” Rarity looked at him and sighed. “You have a disturbing sense of humor, Snickers.”

Snickers hopped over a pothole. “At least I didn’t add a bit to the jar, right? Especially with that set up.”

“Quite,” Rarity nodded to him. “In any case, I’d like to introduce you to one of my closer friends. Applejack, do you have a moment?”

Applejack looked behind her and smiled at Rarity, then Snickers. “Well, Ah’ll be. Imagine meetin’ ya this early, Rares. Ah thought ya spent yer mornin’s gettin’ prettied up and gettin’ ta work on yer own. And this here must be Snickers? Mah sis, Apple Bloom, had a might good list ‘a things ta say about ya,” Applejack winked at him. “It’s nice ta know colts are in the club now, too.”

Rarity bowed her horn slightly to her friend. “Yes, it’s quite the day already. Snickers is indeed in the CMC, and I have spent time preparing myself for the day, but work will come after a few errands have been run. I just wanted to introduce my colt to you before I began shopping and whatnot.”

Applejack motioned with her head for Snickers to go to her. She held out a hoof and bumped it to his, getting a hiss of pain from the mare. “Ouch. Fer a colt ya sure do pack a punch,” she shook her hoof like he really hurt her.

Despite himself, Snickers grinned proudly and looked at Rarity before he gloated. “See that, I’m as tough as a grown mare and I’m only 6!” He hopped in place and then ran to Rarity’s side, taking his place by her left hip.

Rarity and Applejack shared a nod and Applejack tipped her hat. “Nice meetin’ ya, Snickers. Stop on by before ya head on back and Ah’ll give ya a free apple or two.”

Rarity waved at Applejack and they went their separate ways, Rarity actually followed her friend to the end of the block before turning to the bakery with her charge in the corner of her eye. Snickers still walked proudly with his chest puffed up, something she hadn’t seen from him to date.

She still couldn’t believe it had only been three days and the effect of friends, therapy, and Harmony were changing him so much and so fast. With a quiet sigh, Rarity prepared herself. “Snickers, we have to go to the library again today.”

Snickers looked at her with a glower. “Why? So your little love lizard and lick your hooves?”

Rarity stopped and turned, looming over him. “You shan’t speak of Spike that way, I don’t care about your feelings on the matter as long as you work through them. Spikey-wikey is very important to me, and I him, and I would appreciate it if you’d accept that fact without being difficult.”

Snickers felt a half dozen bits about to enter the swear jar, stopped a second before he did something he’d probably regret by Scootaloo and Apple Bloom approaching him by wagon and scooter. “Hey, I thought they were busy.”

Rarity watched the duo approach at high speed, stopping by Scootaloo angling her scooter and using her rear hoof as a brake. Rarity cast a basic shield spell that was only good enough to keep dust away from her coat. “Girls, why aren’t you at school?” Rarity asked as soon as the street was quiet again.

“Oh, hey Miss Rarity. Scoots and me ‘re headin’ to the hospital ta check on Sweetie. She’s been alone all night and might need her friends there ta keep her from goin’ stir crazy.”

Scootaloo nodded. “Yeah, and we haven’t seen her since yesterday when we all split up and she first got hurt. That’s why we’re here,” she looked at Snickers, “hop in, we’ll take you, too.”

Rarity’s horn lit and a small bag of bits left her pocket and floated to Apple Bloom. “Here’s enough bits for snacks and lunch, if any of you need either myself or any other adult, simply find Twilight and she’ll let us know post haste, if you can’t find us otherwise. If there’s an emergency…” she looked at Scootaloo.

“Call the guard or get to the hospital,” Scootaloo said in a drone. “You tell me everytime, I’m not a baby.”

Rarity kept her face neutral. “Who was the foal that insisted that Apple Bloom use double sided tape to stick her mane back on after that manecutter cutie mark attempt?”

Scootaloo looked embarrassed and glanced away, not meeting Rarity’s eyes. “So, uh, Snickers… you comin’?” Scootaloo asked. Apple Bloom patted a helmet in the wagon beside her. Snickers looked at Rarity, then trotted to the wagon and awkwardly climbed in. With help from Apple Bloom he got the helmet on safely and securely.

“We’ll see ya later, Miss Rarity,” Apple Bloom waved, followed by Snickers who paid the mare no attention. Scootaloo used her hind leg to push her scooter back onto the road and with little warning her wings buzzed.

Rarity giggled into her hoof when she saw, for the briefest moment, Snickers’s terrified face just before he held onto the wagon and screamed in fright at the sudden speed they reached. After seven seconds the wagon was around a corner and the foals were out of her mind. Rarity thought over her mental list of to-do’s, then walked to her next destination.

/**\

Snickers tumbled from the wagon when Scootaloo stopped outside the hospital landing on his chest. He got to his hooves and sat down, fumbling with the helmet strap to get it off. “C’mon, stupid thing. Why won’t you just come off?!”

“Woah there, Snickers. Ya can’t just poke and tug, ya gotta learn how ta do it or ask fer help.” Apple Bloom advised and reached under his muzzle. A quiet click came two seconds later and she lifted the helmet off his head. He shook his head and tossed his mane, his ears wiggled and he felt better once he was free.

Scootaloo parked her scooter and the attached wagon off the walking path. “C’mon, I need to make sure Sweetie’s alright. She might be hurt more, or be scared because she’s about to get a shot!”

Apple Bloom tossed the helmets into the wagon. “All right, hold yer horses; we’re comin’. Ya know, it’s not as bad as you think it is, right?” Apple Bloom patted Scootaloo on the back as they walked in with Snickers leading since he knew the way.

“Fillies,” Snickers said once they went inside. “Let’s focus on getting there, then you can make crazy assumptions and freak out, okay?”

Scootaloo and Apple Bloom nodded and agreed, following Snickers deeper into the hospital to find the missing Crusader. It took Snickers practically no time to reach Sweetie’s hospital room once they checked in with the nurses at the front desk. Snickers, looking sullen, knocked on the door and pushed it open when Sweetie asked who it was.

“Sweetie, it’s us,” Snickers said weakly.

Scootaloo rushed past him and slid on the floor into the wall with a thud. She laughed and shook herself. “Hey, Sweetie. Ouch, that looks like it hurts… did they have to get you a new tail with lasers and a grappling tether like in Batmare, so you can ‘pa-shwunk’, swing between buildings and fight crime in Manehattan?”

Sweetie kicked her legs in a well practiced way, turning to see them and breaking into a huge grin. “Scootaloo, that’s silly… awesome, but silly. Is there a doctor I can ask about that?” She pointed asked Snickers, who shrugged her off. “Well, the doctors told me that because I’m not hurt as bad as they thought, I can be out of here tonight in time for supper! Isn’t that great?!”

Scootaloo and Apple Bloom squealed in glee and hopped around one another while Snickers had moved by the wall and sat down, just enjoying the moment and the news. Snickers spoke up when the girls calmed down a bit. He cleared his throat and scuffed the floor awkwardly. “Sweetie… can we take another bath together?” he asked her hopefully, glancing at her friends.

Their friends.

Apple Bloom and Scootaloo gave Sweetie a sly look that she stuck her tongue out in reply to. “Sure, but why?” Sweetie asked.

“Because, I wanna make it up to you and not get you hurt or into the hospital because I’m not a total fu-, er, screw up,” he looked between his friends and they smiled at him, proud he didn’t swear.

Apple Bloom puffed her chest up and stepped toward him, standing as tall as he did so she could look him in his eyes. “Only one one condition are we okay with it.”

Snickers met Apple Bloom’s eyes, then wilted. “What’s that?”

She shoved him and smiled. “We get ta join in, Ah haven’t taken a bath with a colt and Ah wanna see what ya got.”

Scootaloo cheered and Sweetie laughed. “Apple Bloom, he’s really fun! As long as he isn’t slapping you.”

Snickers looked at Sweetie’s smug look with abject horror. “I didn’t… it wasn’t…”

“Hey,” Scootaloo shouted and was in his face an instant later, “you slapped her?”

Snickers’s tail curled around his side and he lowered himself to the floor, looking up at Scootaloo and then to Apple Bloom, his ears fell and he glanced back to Sweetie just in time to see her roll her eyes. “Girls, I was joking. He didn’t actually slap me, he just bumped me with his leg and I was joking around.”

The two relaxed and smiled down at Snickers. “Well, if that’s what happened, why didn’t ya just say so?” Apple Bloom scooped a foreleg under his neck and hefted him to his hooves.

Sweetie giggled and every eye was on her. “His fifth leg.”

All the filly’s eyes moved to his and in that moment he could hear his stomach gurgle in the silence. Scootaloo moved closer to him and snorted in his face just when he was breathing in, followed by Apple Bloom. Both fillies looked at him then stepped back and looked at Sweetie, hanging above them.

Scootaloo broke the silence. “How was it?”

Snickers couldn’t tell what was more embarrassing or mortifying; he wished he could just faint and wake when this conversation was over. He contemplated running from the room but Apple Bloom was fast while Scootaloo was more aerodynamic. He figured he’d kiss the linoleum in eight seconds.

His only option was to accept the moment by lying down and covering his ears while the girls talked.

“Meh, it wasn’t like in that magazine we borrowed from the spa. It was just like a normal leg bumping into me, only without any fur. Aw, he’s blushing and hiding,” Sweetie cooed and the others giggled.

“If Ah know my colors, he’s red as a brick that’s seen a year or two. Ah wonder if he can hear us?”

Scootaloo said his name twice and didn’t get a response, grinning at him then she poked Apple Bloom to get her attention. “So, I call him!”

“What, Ah don’t think so. Ah shared a breath with him, he’s mine.”

“Psh, a few seconds after we did. It’s official, I staked my claim.”

Sweetie cut in at that moment, “Thousand sorrows, girls, remember? We can’t claim a stallion until he at least shows interest in us, or we’re breaking the law and it’s unmoral.”

“Immoral,” a voice came from the hallway before Twilight turned the corner. “I expected you to all be here,” she giggled, “but I didn’t think I’d hear you having a discussion and argument over this topic. How’re you feeling, Sweetie?”

The girls moved aside and Apple Bloom poked Snickers to let him know something was happening. Snickers sat up and then stood once he saw the purple unicorn. “Hey, that lizard isn’t here, is he?”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Why does everyone say that? He’s a dragon, and no. I have him grounded at the library for what happened between you two; he admitted he went too far, but that you started it by throwing a book at him, is that true?” Twilight asked standing in front of him, towering over him like Rarity had.

He felt himself fall submissive under her and nodded.

Twilight took a step back. “Well, I’ll have a talk with Rarity, but I really think you two should at least apologize to one another. You seemed to get along so well when you’d met, then you’re both trying to harm one another a minute after we left you alone,” she shook her head. “Can you please tell me why you needed to throw a book at him to trip him up? It was only a silly game, not a contest.”

Snickers stood up and glared at Twilight. “Did he say I started it for nothing? That dumb reptile, I’ll cut off his tail and when it grow back I’ll do it again,” he grumbled. Magic grabbed his lower jaw and brought it up so he could look into her angry eyes.

Twilight spoke sternly. “No, you won’t. Got it?”

Snickers nodded. When Twilight let him go he rubbed his jaw and looked away. “Look,” Snickers started, “I don’t totally get along with mom, er, Rarity. It’s really confusing because of that vision I got… but Spike was droning on about how Rarity is better than Celestia and I got tired of hearing it.

“Rarity is the best at everything, nopony can compare, she deserves a palace showing how lovely she is,” Snickers mocked Spike’s voice and sat down, crossing his forelegs over his barrel, “and I’d been asking him to stop insulting Princess Celestia and stop talking about Rarity so much, so when he started talking about how Rarity saved a drowning foal from a well I threw a book at him to get him to shut up.

“I didn’t want to start a fight, honest, I just couldn’t stand to hear him talk like that anymore. Then he told me to ‘never insult Rarity’ and spat a flaming spitball at me.”

Twilight listened with rapt attention and nodded while the CMC showed different levels of interest and awe. Twilight posed another question, “Okay, and what about pranking Rarity?”

Snickers rolled his eyes to the largest extent he could. “That’s what started the whole thing, I said I was gonna prank her and he could help. Then he told me not to because, blah, blah, blah.”

Twilight nodded. “Sounds reasonable, but now I have two stories that conflict in a lot of ways. I won’t cast any honesty spells on you or Spike, but when you two meet later I expect you two to work out your differences. Rarity and I will be in the same room and if either of you start to cross the line, we’ll be there to stop it. Understand?” Twilight said, finalizing it with a stomp of her forehoof.

Twilight turned her attention to Sweetie right afterwards. “And Sweetie, I’m sorry I took so long getting here. I talked with the staff and I’m here to fix you up a little faster. Doctor Mend will be in and will help align your tail, then I’ll heal the bones into a fixed position. You’ll need a couple days to recover, but it’s better than the month they projected.”

“A month?” Sweetie squeaked. “They said a week, tops.”

“Well, yes,” Twilight said walking to the support and looking it over, “under normal healing circumstances. Medical magic cuts the healing time by four, my spell is a little more potent since my special talent is magic; so you’ll be out tonight because of that. Otherwise, you’d be here for three more days. Unless,” Twilight smirked, “you want to be here for that long?”

Twilight gave a gentle nudge to the support system and caused Sweetie to spin slightly. Sweetie swung her legs. “No, no, I wanna go home!”

That was when the doctor and two nurses walked into the room. “Well, it’s good to know our hospitality is so well received,” Doctor Mend chuckled. “Children, you’ll have to leave and if you’d like, you can wait in the waiting room and we’ll be along to get you when we’re done. Otherwise, Sweetie will be ready to leave at six tonight.”

After a short deliberation the CMC chose to spend their time having fun and planning new adventures. Saying their farewells, Sweetie waved her friends off and the door closed, cutting the group off. Snickers was between Scootaloo and Apple Bloom, not noticing the looks they gave one another.

Snickers did notice the pressure they were giving him by pressing into his sides. Once outside he stopped and the fillies, not noticing took a few paces past him then fell over one another when their support wasn’t there. Snickers moved up to them and looked down. “What’s going on with you two?” Snickers asked.

“Nothin’ ya need ta worry about, Snickers. Scootaloo’s just actin’ a bit bird brained over somethin’.”

Scootaloo bared her teeth. “I am not, you’re just confused with all the rocks in your head.”

Apple Bloom leapt at Scootaloo and they started to tumble around and wrestle. “Preener.”

Scootaloo growled loudly. “Mud lover.”

Snickers had had enough and stomped the ground in frustration. “Stop it, both of you,” he scolded them and they tumbled apart, lying on the ground and looking at him. “You’re supposed to be friends and this is how you act and treat each other? If this is what it means to be in your club then I don’t wanna be in it,” he said and trotted past them.

There were a few seconds of scrambling bodies and hooves following him. “No, we’re not like this, honest.”

Apple Bloom agreed. “Me ‘n Scoots’re best friends, we just don’t always get along, right Scoots?”

Scootaloo ran beside Snickers. “Yeah, don’t leave, please. I wanna get to know you better.”

“Not as much as me,” Apple Bloom said a bit louder. A few more words were exchanged between the fillies and Snickers didn’t even look back when they started wrestling again. Once again, just when Snickers had reached the next corner and was about to turn they caught up again.

“Hey, we’re sorry! We mean it, no more fighting over you,” Scootaloo said breathing a bit heavier than before.

“Yeah, we can share ya!” Apple Bloom said proudly. Snickers stopped so suddenly he almost fell onto his chin. “Would ya like to be in a herd with us?”

Snickers looked back and turned around, looking between his fellow crusaders. He quietly, nervously, chuckled. “Cutie Mark Crusaders, colt teasers?” He asked taking a step back from the grinning fillies.

Scootaloo blinked curiously. “Nope, we’re serious. Are you in, or out?”

Snickers shook his head. “I’m out, I’m not looking for a relationship or… herding. I’m too young for that stuff.”

Apple Bloom looked at her close friend and they scrunched their eyebrows. “Scoots, what’s he talkin’ about? Too young?”

Attention back on Snickers, Scootaloo asked the next question. “Foals start herding at age two, it’s just like being a close family. It’s not like adults where we,” she and Apple Bloom shuddered, “mate, or anything. How didn’t you know that?”

Snickers exhaled a breath in relief, not sure if he could handle being in a mated herd with two fillies, that probably would include Sweetie Belle; which would make it even more awkward. “Because… I’m not from around here.”

“Hold it, let’s go back to the clubhouse and talk about this. Last thing we need is Diamond Tiara to get on our cases over a rumor she heard. Not to mention how she might look or act after you beat her up yesterday.”

Snickers shrugged. “She deserved it. Worst case, nothing changes and I go to juvie, best case she’s cool from now on.”

Snickers started walking and passed his friends, stopping when Apple Bloom cleared her throat. She pointed in the direction they were facing and Snickers arced quickly and, almost instinctively, walked between the fillies. He stopped and waited for a few seconds, during which time Scootaloo and Apple Bloom grinned manically happily. They touched their sides to his and started back to the farm and clubhouse while Snickers relaxed between them as a feeling of safety and security took him over.

History and Lessons

Snickers, Apple Bloom, and Scootaloo reached the Clubhouse and lay on cushions set closely side by side, within nuzzle distance if the fillies felt like he needed it. After their walk from town to the farm, during which casual conversation and concerns were expressed focusing mostly over Sweetie Belle, what had happened, and what they should do to help Sweetie feel comfortable, having a broken tail; regardless of its status of healing.

Juice boxes and alfalfa snacks were beside each and all eyes were on Snickers. “Well, I’ll only tell you a little because Sweetie should hear a lot of it, too, and I don’t wanna tell the story a hundred times. Well, when I was in that Harmony dream-thing, it made up some stuff that I didn’t really think about until last night.

“I had a really bad dream that I was in that dream world again, and it scared me because I didn’t want that place to be real because I knew it was fake, and nothing I did could get me out of it. I kinda woke up crying last night,” Snickers leaned into the nuzzle Apple Bloom gave him, “and Rarity helped a lot.

“There was something about me being from the future, and Sweetie changing her name… she got a cutie mark I didn’t see or remember.” Snickers looked up and hummed. “I guess it just wasn’t a good dream, both times. But… I guess I can tell you something about me and why I’m so-”

“Weird?” Scootaloo interjected.

Snickers looked at her. “Yeah, that.”

“Finally,” Scootaloo said with a smile.

Apple Bloom got Snickers’s attention by tapping his foreleg with hers. “Yeah, Ah’ve been wonderin’ why ya don’t know some stuff any pony should know…”

Snickers nodded. “Well, I told you I was an electrical engineer. That’s the closest I can say my actual job title, because the words don’t translate from my language to Equestrian. At least, not yet. Who knows what the future holds? I’m… from another world with amazing technology and sciences, but no applicable magic… at least not yet.

”When I came here, to Equestria, I forgot my old language as part of a deal I made, so in my head I have words that I can’t express because they don’t exist here.”

Apple Bloom tapped the cushion he was on. “Can’t you say what you wanna say in whatever language you normally speak and we can try ta figure it out?”

Scootaloo’s wings buzzed in excitement. “Yeah, that’d be awesome! To hear an alien language? No pony would ever believe us,” she giggled, beaming a grin.
“Language I spoke; I only speak Ponish now. If I could speak my old language then I would, I can’t even say my old species’ name. I can say we were bipedal, diurnal, and with better technology. That’s all I can say, except that there was a lot of fighting where I was from and it’s just part of my nature, that’s why I’m always talking the way I do and I don’t tolerate the strong picking on the weak.”

Scootaloo gasped and buzzed her wings. “That’s why you beat up the bullies!”

Snickers shook his head. “No, they were fucking cunts and deserved more than what I gave them.”

Snickers yelped and lept back, on three of his legs while a forehoof covered his nose. “Ah told ya, no cussin’ or ya get yer nose whacked,” Apple Bloom said. Both fillies were frowning at him. “It don’t matter if ya think yer right, cussin’ don’t solve problems, only makes more.”

Snickers felt his eyes watering and let out a quiet whimper before moving back to his spot between Scootaloo and Apple Bloom. Scootaloo placed a forehoof on Snickers’s leg. “It’s okay, Snickers, I won’t tell anypony that you said bad words, just don’t say so many more, okay?”

Snickers rubbed his snout and sniffled. “That didn’t hurt my nose as much as my feelings,” he admitted before blinking and shaking his head. “Why did I admit that?”

Apple Bloom scooted closer and her side touched his. “It’s just being a colt, you’re more sensitive and that’s okay. You have three fillies that’re here ta take care of ya.”

Scootaloo scooted closer and nuzzled Snickers. “Yeah, Sweetie will be here tonight and she’ll help you, too. She can’t really be in the herd the same, since she’s family, but being in a herd makes us all family, right, Snickers?”

Snickers shrugged. “I don’t really know. There’s so much that’s new and just so different and weird. Being naked, these feelings, even the way I think is different, I can feel it,” he said softly letting his snout go. “Ever since I got to this place, Equestria, it’s been a total mindfu- er, change,” he corrected himself when he saw Apple Bloom’s leg twitch. “So, what do I call you since we’re in a herd now?”

“Apple Bloom and Scootaloo,” Scootaloo giggled. “We’re not mated so we don’t need cute names like ‘Snuggly Wuggly Huggie Bear’, blehch,” Scootaloo shuddered.

Apple Bloom stuck out her tongue. “Or kissin’, or any of that adult stuff. All we’re doin’ is learnin’ fer when we’re growed up! Ah think Applejack was in three before she decided ta put it all on hold fer the farm. She’s got this thing with a couple mares she likes, but without a stallion, Ah dunno how it’s gonna work out.”

Scootaloo scoffed. “Psh, easy. My aunts are together and they’re just a couple. They’re plenty happy, too. See, Snickers, you don’t have to be in a herd to be happy, but it would really be nice to think about you when I’m an adult… like, maybe I’d have a chance, if I’m into you then, that is…”

Apple Bloom and Snickers looked at Scootaloo. “Nice goin’, Scoots,” Apple Bloom said with a roll of her eyes. “Why not just ask him fer his hoof right now?”

Snickers moved his forehooves under his barrel. “So,” Snickers said, “what else to herds do… since we’re kind of in one?”

“Well,” Apple Bloom hummed and then smiled when an idea struck her. “Let’s go play hide’n seek! Yer the colt, so ya gotta find us!” Apple Bloom and Scootaloo got to their hooves and bounced to the middle of the room.

“Yeah, Snickers, if you find us you get to tag us, then we have to count to twenty and find you! C’mon, let’s go,” Scootaloo urged and galloped to the door.

“Woah, hold on a minute, mares,” Snickers said, stopping the fillies and getting gasps from them, followed by blushes when they looked at one another. “I don’t know this place like you do, how do you expect me to find you out here?”

Apple Bloom and Scootaloo moved to stand side by side. “By smell,” Scootaloo said with a squeak in her voice.

“Y-yeah… use that colt nose of yers and sniff us out… ya know… like colts do,” Apple Bloom stuttered her reply and couldn’t look Snickers in the eye.

“Okay, what just happened? Why’re you acting weird?” Snickers asked the blushing fillies.

Scootaloo’s little wings flapped and then fanned open.“W-well… y-you tell him, Apple Bloom.”

“Y-ya see, no pony’s ever called us mares before. That’s a big step in a pony’s life, like gettin’ their marks… and a lot of stuff happens with mares that fillies can’t or shouldn’t do,” Apple Bloom looked at Scootaloo, “that we’re kinda curious about.”

Snickers hopped up and shook his head. “Fucking hell no, slap my snout and I’ll kick you under your tail! There’s no way I’m doing anything adult with kids… I might look like a kid, but I’m an adult, got it?”

Scootaloo lifted her snout into the air and turned around toward the door, walking away. Snickers was caught immediately by Apple Bloom looking at Scootaloo and when Apple Bloom followed his eyes she gasped and pointed a hoof at him. “You fibber! Scootaloo, he’s fibbin’ like a chicken in the feed bucket!”

Scootaloo turned around and looked at Apple Bloom, “What? What’s he fibbing about? What’d I miss?”

Snickers shook his head fervently without luck. “No, I was just distracted, I wasn’t-”

“He was peekin’ under yer tail! Ah caught him,” Apple Bloom hopped in place happily. Scootaloo frowned at Apple Bloom. “Scoots and Snickers, sittin’ in a tree…”

Scootaloo stomped a hoof and shouted at her friend. “Apple Bloom, stop it!”

Apple Bloom landed and looked at her friend. “Why, Scoots? He likes us, maybe he likes, likes us?!” Apple Bloom inhaled quickly, “Maybe we can try that one thing in that book?”

Scootaloo pushed Apple Bloom’s chin, turning her head to Snickers. Apple Bloom fell silent and sighed. She and Scootaloo swiftly moved to Snickers and lay beside him again, nuzzling him while he whimpered under the cushion he was on earlier.

Scootaloo sighed and lay her head on Snickers’s back. “Snickers, what happened? We were just teasing, I wasn’t even insulted, honest. It’s okay you peeked, I’m not mad…”

Apple Bloom nuzzled her muzzle into the crook of Snickers’s neck. “Ah’m sorry, too. Ah didn’t think ya’d take it so seriously. What can Ah do ta make it up to you?”

Snickers mumbled something they couldn’t understand, so they moved closer to hear him.

“Sixteen, fifteen, fourteen, thirteen…”

Apple Bloom and Scootaloo looked at one another for a second, their ears went up, their eyes widened, and they both grinned. They ran to the door and flung it open, hiding in different bushes as Snickers counted down. “Heh, almost got them,” Snickers giggled to himself, the blush he sported almost gone as the thought of play scrambled his thoughts and fun was his only goal.

***

Snickers, Apple Bloom, and Scootaloo lay under an apple tree, several partially eaten apples around them all as they lay on their backs and looked at the sky. “Hey, Scootaloo?” Snickers asked. “Why don’t the clouds ever move? Shouldn’t they at least drift sometimes?”

Scootaloo grunted. “Not over towns, the weather teams are super strict when it comes to managing everything. If you wanna see some clouds moving on their own you can either go into the Everfree and maybe get eaten, or somewhere about a mile out of town.”

“Eeyup,” Apple Bloom said, “sis hates when wild weather comes ‘round the farm on account‘a the weather messin’ up the balance. Ain’t a good crop comin’ if nature isn’t just right, after all.”

They lapsed into another silence while other aspects of nature happened around them. Birds chirped, the wind rustled leaves from the trees, and just as Snickers was dozing off an apple fell onto his head. “Ouch! What the fuck?!” He said loudly and held his hooved to his forehead, rolling to his belly.

Scootaloo and Apple Bloom looked at him and yelped when an apple hit the ground between them. They looked up and just noticed a rainbow colored tail pulled into the upper branches of the tree they were under. “Rainbow Dash, that wasn’t funny! Ya apologize ta Snickers or Ah’ll get my sister on ya.”

Rainbow peeked her head from the branches and looked at Apple Bloom. “Or what? Aj can’t do anything to me, especially when I’m up here and she’s down there.”

Scootaloo waved at Rainbow. “Hi, Rainbow Dash! It’s me, Scootaloo, great aim!”

Snickers got up and shoved Scootaloo on her flank. “Stop worshipping her, Scootaloo,” Snickers said, “she’s too lame to play games on the ground with us, that’s why she’s gotta strike from where we can’t get her.”

Rainbow fell from the tree and stopped an inch from the ground, landing and looming over Snickers, looking down on him. To his credit, only his ears sagged and his tail fell slightly. “What was that, chump?”

Snickers looked up at her. “I said you’re lame, what’re you gonna do about it? Fly away, little birdie?”

Apple Bloom and Scootaloo stayed back from the stand off, unsure of what to do. Rainbow snorted and took a step back. “You think you can beat me in something, let’s hear it?”

“Oh, not just me,” Snickers said and motioned to his friends, “all three of us.”

Rainbow laughed mockingly and waved a wing dismissively. “Three on one? I thought you were gonna bring a challenge, looks like you’re the lame one, Snickers,” Rainbow finished by poking the colt in his chest. “And for the record, that’s another bit in your jar.”

Snickers narrowed his eyes. “Fine, tag. No flying, no tagbacks. Rainbow’s it!” Snickers shouted and ran to the fillies, screaming with them as they all split up into different directions. Rainbow laughed and gave chase to Apple Bloom; the game was on.

***

“Apple Bloom?” Snickers felt his ears swivel toward the voice he’d never heard before. He stood up from his hiding place and called a timeout. “Ah hear somepony over here, where are ya, little sister?”

Snickers gasped and looked around, seeing some leaves fall from an apple tree followed by a yellow, red headed filly. “Ah’m here, Applejack! Ah’m playin’ with Rainbow Dash, Scootaloo, and Snickers!”

Applejack called back. “Hold it right where ya are, Ah’m almost there.”

Apple Bloom waved everypony over and they all stood in a small clearing near the Clubhouse. Rainbow Dash stood behind the foals with her wings open and holding a pose when Applejack trotted past a tree and came into view. Snickers looked the farm mare from front to back, taking in her look as an actual hard worker, the first he’d actually seen in this town to date.

“Well, here ya are,” Applejack said to her sister and then looked at Rainbow. “Rainbow, Ah told ya it ain’t the time. Farm’s a bit behind and Ah don’t have time ta go out with ya, Ah’m sorry, really Ah am, but family first,” Applejack looked at her sister and brought the filly into a hug.

Rainbow flapped her wings, taking to a hover. “Yeah, I know that. I was just showing you my feathers, I know you’re gonna make time for me, someday, and when you do…” Rainbow flew a circle around Applejack, “I’ll be ready.”

Applejack waved her foreleg at Rainbow. “That’s fine’n dandy. ‘Til then, stay outta my trees!”

Rainbow laughed and flew away leaving the group. “Aww,” Snickers and Scootaloo said in unison. Scootaloo looked at Snickers. “She was fun, and it was her turn to find us,” Snickers said.

“Yeah, sis. Why won’t ya just go out with her and get her off yer back?” Apple Bloom asked.

Applejack looked at Snickers and raised an eyebrow. He was looking between the Apple sisters curiously. “Hey, Ah’m Applejack. Apple Bloom’s my little sister; who’re you?”

Snickers raised his forehoof and bumped it to Applejack’s. “I’m Snickers, nice to meet you.”

Applejack narrowed her eyes. “The colt with the foul mouth?”

Snickers sighed and sagged. “Yeah, that’s me…”

Applejack tipped his chin up and looked into his eyes. She inhaled sharply and let him go. “Well, Ah’ve never felt that before…”

“What’d’ya feel, sis?” Apple Bloom asked Applejack.

“It was cold, like somethin’ inside that colt’s missin’,” Applejack looked at Snickers and shook her head. “Listen ta me, talkin’ about ya like ya weren’t here. Whatever’s ailin’ ya, lunch’s what ya need ta fix ya up. A hearty meal’ll warm up even the coldest night, Granny says. Now, let’s get’n get some grub,” Applejack said and lowered her front, pawing the ground.

Snickers watched Apple Bloom and Scootaloo do the same before he realized it was a race. He got ready just when Applejack took off, leaving a trail of dust behind her. The others were at a fast pace ahead of him and he fumbled his legs into a trot, then gallop until he caught up with the girls.

“Whoo! The feeling of wind in my mane is great,” Snickers shouted and hopped over a low exposed root. He passed the fillies and ran behind the blonde tail using the red hair tie to keep him on course. Applejack stopped and panted twice, catching her breath quickly and looking back to see where she’d left her sister and friends.

“Wow,” Snickers said startling Applejack, “you’re fast! I could barely keep up with you…” he inhaled deeply and exhaled slowly.

“Well, Ah’ll be. Ah haven’t seen a foal run that fast in my whole life. Much less a colt, tie my tail in a knot that was impressive. Well, yer the first here so ya get first plate,” Applejack gave the table outside a couple taps and Snickers happily grabbed a plate and picked several apple treats.

Scootaloo and Apple Bloom came up to Snickers breathing heavily. “How… did you… get here… so… fast?” Scootaloo asked when she reached the table and rested her head on it while the rest of her lay on the ground. Apple Bloom came up to Snickers’s other side and did the same as Scootaloo.

Applejack laughed with a bucket handle in her mouth. She set it behind Snickers and Apple Bloom sat up and turned to the bucket, burying her muzzle into the water and drinking her fill. Scootaloo sat up and did the same, sighing loudly. “Ah, all better! I call next plate,” Scootaloo said loudly completely refreshed.

Snickers looked back at Scootaloo with a raised eyebrow. “I thought you were tired from your run?” Snickers asked.

Scootaloo giggled with Apple Bloom. “Nah, we were just messin’ around. Apple Bloom, let’s dig in!”

“Hold up a second, Scootaloo! Ah see Rarity comin’ over, Snickers, ya think she’s here for you?”

Snickers groaned with a full mouth.

“Ah think that’s a yes,” Applejack said giving her sister a little shove toward the table. “Eat up, Snickers, yer growin’ and need all the food you can get. Ah’ll send a pie or three home with ya so ya can snack on somethin’ when ya get a hankerin’ fer something.”

“Uhff, Uh afwana eaff…” Snickers gulped some apple juice with his food. “What if I don’t wanna eat apple snacks all day?”

“Then ya have options fer later,” Apple Bloom chimed in.

“Oh, Snickers!” Rarity called from hundreds of feet away. “Stay right there, I’ve come to pick you up to visit Spike and Twilight.”

“Ugh, does she have to sound so happy about it?” Snickers grumbled.

Applejack mussed his mane. “Now, now, young stallion. Rarity’s bein’ mighty kind lettin’ ya run around all day playin’ with these here fillies, the least you can do is show that mare the respect she deserves.”

“Respect,” Snickers snarked, “fuck that noise. Gah!” He yelped when a hard slap hit the top of his head.

“Snickers?! How dare ya say somethin’ like that! Why, if’n Ah had time Ah’d tan yer hide just fer sayin’ that word, but ta say it about mah friend!”

Applejack raised her hoof to swat him again, then looked at Rarity who was holding her foreleg in a blue aura of magic. “Ah, I see my little colt let his distasteful language come out again,” Rarity frowned. “How many words did he say?” She asked letting Applejack’s leg go.

“Just the one… if he’s got a problem cussin’ and ya can’t handle it, Ah’m more than willin’ ta take a switch ta his rump,” Applejack said glaring at the colt who was holding the top of his head with his forehooves. “Ask Apple Bloom, apple trees are mighty tough, and their branches don’t break easily.”

Apple Bloom nodded at Snickers seriously.

“Oh, I won’t need your help in such matters. That’s another bit in the jar and the threat alone is enough to hold his tongue, I’m sure. So, Applejack, while they enjoy a lunch worthy of the Princesses, may I ask you a question in private?”

Applejack grinned at the compliment and turned to lead Rarity a little ways away. “What’d ya need, Rares?”

“Well, Applejack, darling… given how you are a sister to one of Sweetie’s friends, I was wondering if you’d like to come to the party Pinkie is throwing for her return. None of the CMC know about it yet, and after I was cornered in the market by Pinkie, I decided I’d ask you and Twilight.”

“Why, shucks, Rares. Ah’d be delighted… when Ah heard about what happened Ah darn near cried fer the filly. Ah’ve heard once or twice about it happenin’, but never thought about it. Ah think Apple Bloom might need her trainer seat again, just to be safe,” Applejack bit her bottom lip looking at her sister. “Ah’d hate fer her ta go through that.”

Rarity giggled into her hoof. “Why, Applejack. If you do that I imagine your sister would hold quite the grudge for you. I strongly advise against such an action,” Rarity looked at the foals who were grabbing food from one another’s plates to eat. “They certainly seem to be close, don’t they?”

Applejack smirked. “Ah think so… Ah also think that colt is just what the Apple family needs on our farm.” Rarity looked at Applejack anxiously. “Rares, ya think we can have him when he’s older? He’d make a fine pairin’ with mah sister and their foals would be a mighty good help around here.”

Rarity shook her head. “I’m quite sorry, Applejack. You know that’s not up to me to decide, it’s his choice on who he wants to be with.”

“Ah know that,” Applejack smiled at the foals play shoving over their plates, “but if ya kinda nudge him a bit, tell him every day how good apples are or have him come on down to the acres…” Applejack trailed off when Rarity’s look turned to a frown.

“I will do no such thing, that colt has been through enough already in his short life and for me, his mother and caretaker, to do such a thing… why it’s simply…” Rarity couldn’t think of anything so she said the first thing that came to her mind, “fucked up!”

Rarity and Applejack gasped, covering their mouths and looking at the foals nervously. “Rarity,” Applejack said aghast, “Ah’ve never heard ya say that word in all my years…”

“I… I’m so sorry, darling, really. I… it just slipped out and I meant nothing by it. Please, understand that I meant no offense to you.”

Applejack shook her head. “No, I’m not offended, just surprised. Ah get it. It’s pushin’ the colt in the wrong direction in life and Ah was wrong ta suggest what Ah did. Ah hope you can fergive me.”

Rarity hugged her friend. “Of course I forgive you, our friendship means more to me than some hopeful words, even if they do imply something inherently wrong,” Rarity said and got a playful swat on her foreleg from Applejack. Rarity knew it might bruise, but she toughed it out anyway as she and her friend watched the foals start to wrestle in the grass, their food half forgotten.

.*.

Rarity knocked on the door to Golden Oaks Library before letting herself in. She was surprised to see three stallions and a mare inside looking at books. She walked past them, leaving Snickers to look at books at his own pace, and ascended the stairs. “Twilight? Are you up here?”

Twilight’s voice was muffled when she called back. “In the bathroom, Rarity.”

“Ah, well, Snickers and I are here to meet with Spikey, but it seems you have some business downstairs for once.” Rarity knocked on the door and turned the handle, finding it locked.

“I know,” Twilight said, “I’ll be right out. Stallions usually come by every Thursday when the Manhattan magazines arrive. They’re full of articles and stories, eep! Stories stallions love to read that cover -ouch- grooming, current trends in mane and tail styling, and sometimes certain positions for sensual evenings.”

Rarity knocked on the door again. “Twilight, are you certain you’re alright?”

“Perfectly fine,” Twilight said as the door unlocked and swung in, showing Rarity something the white mare would never forget. “See, I look nice, don’t I?”

Rarity’s cheeks puffed and she let a snort leave her snout. “Tw-twilight, while I do like the stockings… are you wearing makeup and eyelashes? Ahem… I’m not sure the saddle and,” Rarity squeezed her eyes shut as tears formed at the corners of her eyes, “bridle are in style for such a common occurrence as stallions checking out magazines.”

Twilight, oblivious to her fashion choice being over the top, looked at her legs. “Oh? I read in one of the magazines the stallions are reading that they like this sort of thing on mares, and the bridle is a bit tight. Thank Celestia I didn’t listen to the article and put in the bit with a ball on it,” Twilight cocked her head and furrowed her eyebrows at Rarity. “Rarity, this is no laughing matter. There are stallions down there waiting to see me this week wearing the latest in Manehattan fashion.”

Rarity’s mascara was running down her cheeks and she shook her head, holding her barrel as she fell over. “T… Tw… Twilight, y-you…” Rarity tried to speak. Twilight rolled her eyes and her horn glowed as she cast her spell pulling herself through the aether and a space beyond understanding to appear in the center of the room.

“Hello, stallions,” Twilight said in a sultry voice, swaying her hips as she went to a bookshelf. “Oh no,” she said in a high voice, pulling a book from its shelf, “I dropped my book. I’d better pick it up.”

The stallions and mare were watching Twilight without blinking as she started to lean down, licking her lips to pick the book up in her mouth.

“Miss Twilight, can I borrow this book?” Snickers called from the next room scaring Twilight into casting her teleportation spell. Snickers turned the corner with a large book on his back and stopped when he saw four ponies glaring at him. “What?”

Rarity was wiping her eyes with some tissue paper from Twilight’s room. “Oh, darling, that was the funniest thing I’ve seen in days. Thank you for that,” she snorted and giggled seeing Twilight still dressed the same.

Twilight exhaled a shaky breath. “That was close… Snickers almost saw me do the drop and pick up.”

Rarity gasped and stood up, moving beside Twilight and turning the mare to face her. “Please, tell me you didn’t actually go down there dressed like this,” Rarity gestured to Twilight who nodded in reply. “And you did the drop and pick up?”

Twilight moaned in frustration. “I was almost done, all their eyes were on me and I was just about to do the swish, but Snickers came into the room and I teleported away. I can’t have a colt see me do that, it’s a technique to get a coltfriend, Rarity, not a colt!”

Rarity gave Twilight a little shake. “Keep it together, mare. First of all, undress. Second, take that makeup off, you have the wrong pallet for your fur. Lastly, never do this again, do you understand me?”

Twilight pushed Rarity’s hooved off her. “Rarity, I need a stallion. I have needs, okay? I can’t just read by myself every night and snuggling with my pillow isn’t the same,” she stomped a forehoof. “And I’m not trying with Spike anymore. His spines are firming and they poke in all the wrong places.”

Rarity placed her hoof over Twilight’s mouth. “Tonight, after a party I’m inviting you to at my home, you and I will talk, mare to mare, about the articles in the magazines and their accuracy in real life. And after that… tut tut, after that I will help you dress for the occassion for finding a suitable mate.”

Twilight blushed and took a step back, looking down the tree to the ponies that were milling around, grumbling about something while a chocolate colt lay on the couch with a book open. “I… I’m not looking for a mate, Rarity. That’s a huge step in a relationship and I don’t think I’m ready for that right now.”

Rarity cocked her head. “Then why have you chosen to dress so… enticingly?”

Twilight looked herself over and moved her jaw under the tension of the bridle. “I don’t get it, don’t stallions like this?”

Rarity sighed quietly and ushered her friend into the bathroom.

Snickers looked at the bookshelves and the tomes held on them. Some were history, some were fiction, several were about magic and written in a language he couldn’t read, then he found the technology section and grinned. He pulled out a book that interested him and scoffed. “What is this, the dark ages?”

Snickers thought it over and shook his head. “Yeah, pretty much. Let’s see… heh, horse puns. Horse puns. Horse puns… oh, what have we here?” he asked himself. He used his hooves to pull out a book on engineering and flipped it open to the middle. He looked at the diagram of an airplane that would never fly, but seemed to be something they were trying for.

Snickers shrugged and, after several tries, got the book onto his back. He was surprised to see how well it balanced once there and chalked it up to magic. “Miss Twilight, can I borrow this book?” he asked as a flash of light brightened the room. He saw every pony looking at him. “What?”

“Oh, nothing,” a stallion said, turning back to the bookshelves, “just ruining the best part of the week for some of us.”

Snickers raised an eyebrow, then dismissed the comment and moved to the couch to read the book. He skimmed the text getting little from it, except many of the designs were wrong or simply didn’t make sense. He looked at the cover again and wondered how practical these tools were; the thought that physics could work separately from magic or in conjunction with it made him wonder.

Returning to the book, Snickers didn’t notice the patter of feet on the floor approaching him until Spike crawled up onto the seat and sat beside him. Snickers sat up and held the book between himself and the little drake. “Hey,” Snickers said carefully.

Spike exhaled and twiddled his thumbs. “Look, I’m sorry I got mad and overreacted yesterday. I had a long talk with Twilight and there’s this thing with dragons that makes us obsess with things we think are ours, and I guess that’s how I see Rarity. When you insulted her I just lost it and… I’m sorry.”

Snickers started breathing again. “Uh, I’m sorry I dissed your girl. Won’t happen again, honest.”

Spike looked sheepishly at Snickers and hesitantly extended his arm with a closed fist. “We cool?”

Snickers looked at the hopeful dragon and then his fist. “Uh, not yet… but let me get over being almost melted by your spit, okay?”

Spike winced and moved his fist to his leg. “Yeah, I get it… I don’t have any friends here yet, and this is why, I guess.” Spike slipped from the couch sullenly.

Snickers shoved the book away from himself and rushed to follow Spike. “Hold up, Spike. I didn’t say no, just… give me a couple hours, okay? Just to… come to terms with what you said and see if I feel differently. When I was back home, I had a teacher that taught me to think everything through before you act.

“It applies to everything I do… okay, everything really important. And, being friends with you would be awesome, but I don’t want to start a friendship being afraid of someone because that would be the foundation of our friendship, get it?”

Spike smiled and nodded. “Yeah, I do. Hey, maybe you can tell me where you’re from… if we become friends. And why they say ‘someone’ instead of ‘somepony’.”

Snickers averted his eyes. “Well, I’m from far away and a lot of things are different,” he looked at Spike, “where I was from we weren’t supremacists.”

Spike looked at the ponies around the room and then at his hands. He looked up at where Twilight’s room was, then back to Snickers. “You might have a point, but be careful who you say that to. Some ponies are really sensitive about…” Spike hesitated and leaned closer to Snickers, “their xenophobia.”

“I knew it!” Snickers shouted and stomped a forehoof on the wooden floor clacking loudly, wincing when he was hushed. “Sheesh, pull the stick out, people. The librarian isn’t even here.”

The mare in the room grumbled and gave Snickers a dirty look. “Hey, I came here all the way from Briar’s Point to see that librarian, and you just scared her away.”

Snickers looked at the mare. “I have no idea or care about you or what you’re talking about. I’m talking with my… dragon that I know and it doesn’t involve you. So since we’re in a library, why don’t you ‘C’ your way out of here before ‘D’ jumps over ‘E’, and I have to fuck you up.”

The mare gasped loudest in the room. “Young colt, that is no way to talk to an adult!”

“Yeah, heard it all before. Ya try to touch me and I’ll buck you under the tail so hard you’ll grand foals will feel it,” Snickers said sternly when the mare took a step toward him.

She stopped and noticed he was serious. “You’re just a little troublemaker, when I find your mother I’ll tell her and you’ll be put in time out for hours.”

“Psh, yeah. Remember, I’m a colt. I have to be treasured and loved like the jewel I am,” Snickers pouted and one stallion awed.

“Look here, little pony, I’ll have none of your lip service while-”

“Lip service? Ha,” Snickers faked a laugh, “your lips are so wide I bet I could see your cervix. Service that while you walk out of my face.”

The stallions had started to chuckle and it built into controlled laughter at the mare’s reddening head. Snickers turned his attention to Spike, his piece was done and he wouldn’t be pulled into anything else with the mare. He did turn and look at her when she started stomping all her hooves on the floor like a filly throwing a tantrum.

She turned and stomped to the door, opening it with a slam against the wall. “I’ll look for your mother, you little brat, and when I do I’ll make certain she spanks you, or I will!”

The mare stomped into the street and galloped out of sight. “Wow, what a drama queen,” Snickers said and got nods in return.

“Son,” one of the stallions said, “you do have a potty mouth on you… however that thing about her cervix was clever… I may use that someday.”

Snickers turned to the stallion and smiled. “Shoot, when I was with a mare I really wanted, I’d offer her help and if she said no, I’d just mumble, ‘If you need me, I’ll be at your cervix.’ They loved it if they heard and took it as a kindness if they misunderstood me. Either way, I’d win!”

“Wait… are you saying you’ve had mares?”

Snickers nodded. “Oh, yeah. Before I got here I was just a single stallion survivin’ day ta day… mares were begging me to spend a couple hours with them… it was no big deal.”

Spike grabbed Snickers’s foreleg and pulled him to they were muzzle to muzzle. “Wait, how old are you, Snickers? You can’t be over four… and you’ve mated with a mare already?”

Snickers nodded. “Yeah… why, is that bad?”

The silence was deafening for several seconds. “Dude,” Spike said, “that’s messed up.”

Snickers shook his head. “No, it was fine. I was an adult back home, I never did anything too bad, even at my most excitable.”

“Snickers, have you told anypony else about this, about your past with mares?” Spike asked.

Snickers pulled his foreleg away from Spike. “Yeah, and it’s none of your business about the details or who I told what to,” he said calmly. “Besides, I think I’m cool with you being my friend after that saggy teat nag got me all emotional.”

Spike quickly changed his mood to happiness and excitement. “Really? You’ll be my friend, for serious?”

“Sure thing, Spike,” Snickers rubbed the fins on Spike’s head, “just don’t be a floppy dick and we’ll be cool, cool?”

“Uh, dragon don’t have… oh, oh, I get it! Yeah, I’ll totally be a cool dude to hang out with and read comics, maybe talk about mares… like Rarity,” Spike sighed and adopted a dreamy look.

“Look… hey,” Snickers said to the stallions who were still watching Snickers and Spike talk, “mind your own bees wax. Spike, I just want a bro to hang with, I don’t care what we do; as long as it’s not illegal or breaking the law. I’m not going to jail here over something dumb, go it?”

Spike nodded and took Snickers’s hoof in his hand, leading the colt back to the couch. “Okay, I won’t. I just really wanna do stuff friends do that aren’t about cleaning this place,” Spike looked around the room disdainfully.

Spike climbed up onto the couch while Snickers hopped up. “I want more out of life before I grow up and can’t do as much. What do you and the fillies do for fun?”

“I dunno, play tag, hide and seek, cards, kind of. I dunno, we just have fun. I’m new to being a colt, but the wiring in my noggin’s changing me to thinking like a colt, so I kind of am in a mental bubble where outside I’m a colt, but inside I’m an adult.”

Spike ran his claws through his scales on his belly. “Well, it sure sound different. Do you have any proof you’re from far away, or should I just take your word on it?”

“Spike, my drake, have I ever let you down?”

“We just met, Snickers. And yesterday I almost melted your skin off, so I think we should celebrate our friendship with ice cream! It’ll show that we’re cool now, right?”

Snickers pulled the book back over and flipped to a page. “Sure thing, Spike. If anyone tries anything to mess up our friendship, I’ll karate chop them to next week and kung fu their faces into the floor,” Snickers hopped up onto the couch and balanced on his hind legs, chopping his left foreleg down with a sound effect akin to a battle yelp.

Snickers lost his balance and fell onto his bottom on the couch, rocked forward, and happily got back to his book.

Party

“Twilight, I must ask why you believed that dressing in such an outfit was even acceptable in a public venue?” Rarity asked Twilight as they left the bathroom.

“I told you, Rarity, it was in the magazines.”

Rarity shook her head and let Twilight guide them down the stairs. “Twilight, there’s a party tonight and you’re coming. After the festivities wind down, I’m taking you to my room and we are going to talk about what you’ve read, understand me?”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “You’re just like Spike, telling me you know more than the ponies that write the articles. Well, maybe you might, Rarity, but that doesn’t mean everything you know is applicable to this situation.”

“Darling, because it’s fashion, and that’s something I know more than a fair share about. What you were wearing was something a mare desperate for thirty bits and a free ride across the slums of downtown Manehattan. That is not a good thing, Twilight,” Rarity interjected when Twilight inhaled to begin talking. Twilight exhaled and humphed.

“Well, whatever you may think, the ponies in the library are always happy to see me when I dress up for them,” Twilight countered.

They reached the main floor and Rarity looked over the ponies. “Excuse me, who is here to see Twilight drop something?” Every adult raised a hoof and Rarity looked back at Twilight. “You may all leave now, there will be no more shows of any kind in the library.” Rarity stomped her hoof and the ponies grumbled while leaving. One glared at Snickers and when Rarity saw the colt and dragon on the couch she moved behind the stallion and ushered him out.

“Have a nice day, come back for another book anytime, we’re open sunrise to sunset,” Twilight shouted as they left and the door creaked closed. “Spike?! Where’s the graphite for the door hinges? Spike?!”

“Holy crap, he’s right here you loud queef factory!” Snickers slammed his hooves on his book and looked at Twilight, then his eyes darted to Rarity and his ears went limp. “Uh, hi, mom… I didn’t mean--”

“Silence, Snickers. First of all,” Rarity said marching toward the males on the couch, “thank you for calling me your mother again, it warms my heart. Second,” Rarity said and looked over to Twilight who was approaching cautiously, “watch your language around others, need I remind you of your first day here and the jar that already contains several bits?”

“But, I didn’t even swear that time,” Snickers rebutted.

“True, however you still insulted a pony that didn’t deserve it. Not that any actually do, but that brings me to my third… are you two getting along again, or should I be wary of you, Spike, harming Snickers over his colorful vocabulary?” Rarity looked between them both.

Spike raised a hand. “I’m cool with him, as long as he doesn’t try to hurt you or anything.”

“Hurt me?” Rarity asked and looked at Snickers. “What were you planning?”

“Nothing, honest!” Snickers replied quickly, “I was talking about pranking you. Like, sneezing power in your cocaine or jalapeno juice on Mister Ed.”

Rarity grimaced and stepped back. “I have no cocaine, or drugs of any kind for that matter, and if you do anything to Mister Ed, I swear the same will be done to you,” Rarity threatened with the utmost honesty behind her eyes.

Snickers silently nodded. “Yeah, I won’t, I was just joking because not even I’m that mean.”

“Okay,” Twilight said after listening in for a moment, “what’s going on here? A colt and a dragon that were fighting are best friends, I can understand, but I have so many questions about everything that’s happened lately. Rarity, what happened with Harmony and Snickers? Snickers, why did you call Rarity your mother just now? What’s a ‘queef’ and is it a bad word, or did you mean ‘quiche’, because those are actually pretty tasty, but I’m not making them in any way that would even come close to a factory.”

“Twilight,” Rarity said and called some cushions over to sit on, “there’s a lot that’s happened, mostly to poor Snickers here, over the past day. If I could, I’d take it all away and leave him where he was, as it seemed he enjoyed it quite a bit more.”

Snickers knocked his book onto the floor. “Forget that, that place was a nightmare I can’t escape now.”

“What do you mean, Snickers?” Twilight asked and dropped a scroll and quill into Spike’s lap.

“That place, Harmony’s asshole or wherever, sent me to some dreamland where I just returned from a wasteland that wasn’t like my home at all!” Snickers fumed and snorted. “I thought I was family with Sweetie and Rarity when I woke up in the dream and we had a great day, then I went to sleep and woke up for real just…” he growled and squeezed tears from his eyes. “It fucked with me so bad, I didn’t know what was real or a fucking lie… I still don’t fucking know,” he collapsed onto his belly and grabbed a pillow to cover his head.

Rarity moved next to him and hugged him awkwardly. “Darling, whatever happens, I’m here for you. You may not understand, or appreciate it, but you have a lot of ponies who are willing to do anything to help you.”

Snickers peeked his eye from under the pillow. “Use your magic powers to erase my memory of that place, then?” He asked Twilight.

Twilight shook her head. “No way, mind magic is very tricky in the first place. Using mind magic on a foal is another problem.”

Snickers sat up. “I’m not a fucking foal! I’m a grown adult that got crammed into this body! Give me a fucking mind wipe or whatever,” he shouted and tumbled off the couch into Rarity’s magical grasp.

“Young stallion, that language is uncalled for at the worst of times. I’ve tolerated you acting this way and I’m growing tired of you claiming to be an adult when you clearly don’t act as though you are one.”

Snickers was set back on the couch. “Well, what do you expect? I was in my forties last week, now I’m, what, a five year old colt?” He gestured to himself. “How do you expect me to act?”

Twilight and Spike shared smiles. “Snickers, if you were in your forties you’d be older than most of the townsponies of Ponyville.”

Snickers looked at Spike. “How old do ponies live?”

Spike shrugged. “Depends on the tribe, but earth ponies are usually ninety when they join the herd in the meadows.”

Snickers raised an eyebrow, still unsure of the conflicting and loose religious beliefs held by those around him. Rarity tapped her hoof to her jaw. “However, Granny Smith is nearly one hundred and ten, while my grandmother only lived to ninety.”

“Yes,” Twilight said sagely, “it truly depends on the tribe and pony themselves. But, you can expect a long life as long as you don’t injure yourself or get too sick… I guess you can make eighty, easy.”

Snickers sat in stunned silence. “I… can live that long? How old are you, then?” He looked between the mares.

Rarity flipped her mane. “I happen to be sixteen, darling, even though it is quite rude to ask a lady her age.”

Twilight giggled. “I don’t mind. I’m fourteen, and I’ve spent the last eight years learning both at Celestia’s school and directly under her tutelage. Do you know how old you are, Snickers?”

Snicker sat back and thought about it, in the back of his mind an answer came to him. “I’m almost six, in the spring, during the second full moon.” He shook his head. “Where’d that come from?” he asked.

“Sounds like you know a little more than you let on, dude,” Spike said and punched Snickers’s leg playfully.

“Wait,” Snickers added, “what about the others? Since we’re talking about it, and all.”

Rarity humphed and was about to dismiss the colt, but Spike started before she could. “Well, Rainbow Dash is the youngest at fourteen, then it’s Applejack at fifteen, Pinkie Pie is sixteen, Fluttershy…”

Rarity rolled her eyes. “Seventeen, Spike. She is actually the oldest of us all, which is what made her such a hit with the mares and stallions when she modeled for that time, she’s at the perfect age to bear foals while holding a steady career. Why that mare hasn’t even found a pony to...

“Ah, yes. Well, let’s make plans for tomorrow since we’re all here and make true friends between these two,” Rarityexpertly changed the topic and tousled Snickers’s mane while urging him to move. Twilight nudged the drake into motion from watching Rarity’s swaying rump, getting him to blush while rolling the scroll up before handing it over to Twilight.

***

The sun was setting when Sweetie was led into the doorway to the Carousel Boutique, lights flicked on and surprise was shouted, delayed, Pinkie shouted a second too late. “Shoot,” the pink mare shouted and got a lot of laughs. Sweetie was swarmed by other foals her age while Snickers sat at a table in the back of the room.

“Twilight,” Snickers asked the mare who sipped some punch from her cup, “how much did you heal her?”

“Oh, enough so she can go through her days like normal, just make sure she doesn’t over stress her tail by pulling on it, having her sit on it, or do anything that could push it out of alignment. Being a Cutie Mark Crusader, that may seem difficult, but I’ll have a talk with all of you about that after the party,” Twilight waved at a friend across the room. “I’ll see you later, have fun.”

Snickers watched her walk away and noticed the sway in her hips when she walked, averting his eyes in time to avoid thinking anything he shouldn’t. He adjusted his blue and white shirt, making sure he was comfortable before getting to his hooves and joining the crowd of foals. “Oh, Snickers,” Scootaloo called when he was close enough to cause a scene and get all eyes on him for a second.

Apple Bloom draped a foreleg over his back. “This here is Snickers, he’s new ta town and is our first male crusader and herdmate,” the farm filly proudly announced loud enough to get several adult’s attention. One stallion did a spit take across the mare across from himself.

“Wow,” several fillies said as they left Sweetie and crowded around Scootaloo and Apple Bloom, asking questions over one another of the fillies basking in the attention about the shy colt held in place by his herd mates.

Applejack hugged Rainbow since she was the closest pony she knew, beaming a smile at Snickers and his closeness to her little sister. Rainbow blushed and relaxed into the tight embrace of her earthen friend.

Rarity, meanwhile, dropped her cup and started wide eyed at the three foals being bombarded with questions. Rarity marched to Applejack and tugged her elbow with her magic. “What’s up, Rares? Isn’t this the best thing ever? Snickers might be an Apple soon.”

“Applejack,” Rarity said quietly, “did you put those fillies up to this? After our talk earlier, none the less?”

“Rarity,” Applejack said letting Rainbow go and ignoring when the blue mare thudded to the floor, “Ah wouldn’t do that behind yer back. What happened between them is as natural as the reddest apple fresh off the branch,” Applejack wiped a tear from her eye and smiled weakly. “Ah couldn’t be prouder of mah sister than Ah am right now.”

“Well, be that as it may; I won’t condone my son being in a herd so soon. He has far too much to adapt to and there was an issue with the magic of Harmony bonding with him,” Rarity said loud enough for Applejack to hear, if she was paying attention. Applejack waved her hat in front of her face.

“Ah can’t believe it, my little sis is all grown up…”

Rarity ground her teeth, then looked at the fillies pressing their sides to her son, preventing him from moving away from them. Her horn lit and surrounded Snickers in her magic, pulling him free and to her side while still scrambling against the unknown pull that moved him.

“Hey, what’d you do that for?” Snickers shouted while he turned to face Rarity.

“I have strong reservations of you being in a herd so soon after becoming a member of this household, young stallion. The last thing we need is for you to fall victim to nature and--”

“I told you, Rarity,” Snickers said with a scuff of his hoof across the floor, “I’m not doing a filly, alright? It’s just not natural for me, so get off my tail, okay?”

Rarity looked around her and noticed several partygoers looking at her. “Snickers, we’ll talk in the kitchen for a moment, then you can rejoin your friends. Sweetie,” Rarity called over the noise of the foals and music, “we’ll be right back. Play some games and share a story, okay?” Rarity picked Snickers up in her magic and placed him on her back.

“Okay, this is important,” Rarity said once they were away from the crowd, “you may be an adult in mind, as you said, but you’re a colt in body. Regardless of what you think or believe,” Rarity lay on her belly to look into Snickers’s eyes, “you’re acting like a colt, and you have to prepare yourself for urges that will happen that you will have trouble controlling.”

“Whatever,” Snickers waved her off, “I can control whatever ‘urges’ you’re talking about. I’m the master of my own body, not this little,” he patted his body at different places, “body.”

Rarity sighed and shook her head. “I can’t believe I’m going to do this,” she closed her eyes and silence befell the room.

“What’re you doing? Casting some spell on me? Because I’ll let you know that… I’m not really…” Snicker inhaled deeply and his eyes went blank for a second. He shook his head. “I’m not really ready to have… some magic… stuff, happened… what’s happening?” he asked as his mind became fuzzy. He shook his head again and noticed Rarity blushing brightly.

“That, Snickers, is the scent of a receptive mare. All it took was for me to think several lewd thoughts to bring me to readiness, and look what’s happened to you when you noticed?”

Snickers stood up and stepped back from her. “What the hell, I feel funny, Rarity.”

“I’m sorry darling, let me open a window,” Rarity apologized as cool air blew into the room. Snickers shivered and squatted down, blushing. “Ah, I see… and hopefully you do as well. You’re a colt, Snickers, no matter what you wish to be otherwise. You may not be able to sire a foal, but the desire is there none the less, what will you do if one of your herdmates becomes ready around you?”

“I’ll… fight it. I can fight this,” Snickers said trembling.

“I understand you believe you can,” Rarity placed a hoof on his back and Snickers leaned up to nuzzle her foreleg, “but there is a spell I know that can help you in this case, as well as a couple tools for added resistance to the call of nature.”

“Wh-what are they? I think I need them, please mommy, I can’t fight this,” he whimpered and brought a certain elation to Rarity’s heart.

“Okay, this is a spell to tense certain muscles inside your body, it will help you from exposing yourself and encouraging females from encouraging the cycle,” she thought the spell over several times and then cast it on Snickers.

Snickers sighed and shuddered, then stood up. “Well, that’s one problem gone,” he said looking under himself. “What’s the other stuff? Some kind of aid to pump out the stress?” He asked and averted his eyes.

Rarity laughed loudly. “Hardly, you’re not exactly at the age to produce what would be expected and you can handle such matters on your own. No, there’s a special cream that can be applied to your upper lip that will mask the scent and prevent accidental overdoses of scents that cause those reactions.

“Most foals know of them by now, but you’re a bit different in every way, it seems. You may be what you claim,” Rarity said moving beside Snickers, “but you are also everything you seem to be. A colt that wasn’t exposed to our society as much as he should have been, now go and play. I’ll prepare for the night ahead,” she nudged him with her hoof and he looked back with an awkward smile before trotting from the room. “I have so much more to do being a parent than I thought,” she said taking a seat and rubbing her temple.

“Hey, Snickers, you’re back!” Sweetie said and hugged him. “It’s so cool you’re a part of our herd, the girls told me about the games you played and how much fun you are, so I hope you wanna still take a bath tonight? I promise not to break any more bones,” she giggled and nuzzled him.

Snickers blushed. “Yeah, that’s cool. Are Scootaloo and Apple Bloom joining, too?”

Sweetie shrugged. “Maybe, I don’t care right now. I just need to make sure you’re okay, since you were feeling really bad after my slip.”

Snickers nodded weakly. “Yeah, I’m okay. I just keep learning new things that are really messing with me, and I have to learn what this Harmony thing is all about, too.”

Scootaloo ran up to Snickers. “Forget about that, you’re gonna play with us! C’mon,” she moved beside him and urged him toward the foals. “And we’ve got a ton of new friends to introduce you to. This is Featherweight and he takes pictures for the paper, and this is Twist, she makes great peppermint sticks…”

The night flew by filled with games, drinks, sweet snacks full of hidden vegetables, and fun for Snickers that he wouldn’t have been able to have in his past life. Finally, at nearly nine at night, most of the foals were teetering on the edge of sleep and being brought home while adults were filtering out and saying their farewells.

Sweetie Belle was deep asleep and being carried to her bed with Snickers, both on Rarity’s back. Reaching Sweetie’s room, she decided that both foals could sleep together in the hope it would help Snickers with his dreams and give her a night without Sweetie Belle crawling into bed with her.

Tucking them in, Rarity left the room with the door open to talk with Twilight about fashion and being used as eye candy for ponies without her knowledge or understanding.

Snickers rolled to his right and scooted closer to Sweetie Belle and draped a foreleg over her. She scooted back and snuggled into his embrace and they stayed like that for most of the night, cuddling and cozy with the sweetest dreams they could have had.

Accidental Affections

The days seemed to pass faster than Snickers could handle. He spent mornings with his mother and aunt, afternoons after school was spent with the CMC where he tried once for a cutie mark and ended up upside down tangled in rope from an apple tree, then he’d spend time at the library with Twilight and Spike.

Twilight took an interest in Snickers’s reading of science and engineering books while Spike would randomly toss wadded paper at Snickers and the colt would bat them back in a form of catch that they’d both enjoy. Rarity never came up, as it was the best option for them both.

After that, Snickers would meet with Fluttershy and be taken on a short flight to a cloud where the colt would rest on the yellow mare’s back, wings, or belly and tell her about his day and feelings. It was a great schedule that Twilight had made and it quickly became routine for the rest of the week, each night ending in a shared bath with Sweetie Belle and finally cuddling and snuggling to sleep.

Saturday, Snickers took a placement test for school before his routine began, and the following day was the first change in his routine, starting in the evening.

“Sweetie Belle, we’re here,” Scootaloo called from the showroom floor with Apple Bloom behind her.

“Snickers and me are in my room,” Sweetie called back.

“Snickers and I,” Rarity shouted from the kitchen getting a groan from Sweetie that could almost be heard outside.

“Why is everypony a dictionary?!” Sweetie lamented. Snickers chuckled from across the checkers board at his aunt.

“Maybe because you need to read one, first.”

Sweetie moved her piece. “I am not reading the dictionary! Your turn,” she pouted.

Snickers jumped three of her pieces. “Ha, King me!”

Sweetie giggled. “You mean Princess you. You’ve gotta learn the rules of the game, silly.”

Snickers rolled his eyes. “Then Prince me, since I’m not a girl.”

Sweetie covered his piece with one of his older ones and she prepared her move when Scootaloo ran into her room and jumped onto the bed. Apple Bloom stopped beside the bed and looked at Scootaloo as the orange filly began to bounce and jump. “We’re here, we ain’t too late, are we?” Apple Bloom asked looking at the two playing their board game.

“Uh, no. Why would you even ask that when you see we’re still dry? It’s barely after supper, at that,” Snickers said snarkily.

“Well, no reason ta get snippy,” Apple Bloom snarked back, “Scoots ‘n me didn’t wanna miss our first bath as a herd, and we were almost late thanks ta ‘hoppy’, over here.”

Scootaloo did a flip between jumps. “Hey, I need to bring my shampoo! It’s special for a pegasus.”

“Well, get it and let’s get wet,” Apple Bloom cheered. Sweetie, having learned some of Snickers’s humor, looked at the colt and they both giggled. Sweetie blushed a little, though.

“Okay, I’ll tell Rarity to start the bath and we can do that, but that’ll be a few minutes. Anypony have to go before we start?” Sweetie asked. Everyone raised a foreleg and then they all scrambled out of the room to the bathroom and got stuck in the doorway.

Apple Bloom wiggled against Scootaloo. “Scoot, get outta my way. Ah gotta go.”

“No way, you can hold it way longer than me,” Scootaloo shouted back.

Snickers planted his forehooves and pushed himself back, watching as the three fillies fell forward onto the tile. He laughed as they got up and started to wrestle. Taking the opportunity, Snickers pranced past them and stood over the toilet and started to pee.

“Hey, no fair,” Scootaloo shouted and pointed to Snickers, “fillies first! That’s the rule.”

Sweetie shoved Scootaloo. “Who made that rule up?”

Apple Bloom shoved Sweetie and they all giggled. “Who cares, colts should go first since they’re so special.”

“Special my dock,” Scootaloo said and shoved both her friends getting a double shove in return. “Heh, he’s just special cuz he’s the only male in the herd, if we had others--”

“No way,” Snickers say stepping on the pedal to flush, “I’m not sharing with another dude. I already said that.”

Scootaloo shoved past the other fillies and made it next, swishing her tail and catching it before she sighed in relief.

“Ah know,” Apple Bloom said moving into line after Scootaloo, “that’s pretty normal, but if we had a large herd then we’d probably have ta have one more stallion. Ah heard it’s a lotta work fer one stallion ta take care’a more than five mares, especially once they start foal’n.”

Scootaloo finished and was unceremoniously shoved away by Apple Bloom who took her place and grabbed her tail. “Yeah, you’re a pretty tough colt,” Scootaloo said letting her tail sway freely, “but you probably can’t even handle us three… oh, except Sweetie Belle,” she corrected. “How do you think you could handle a bunch more of us?”

Snickers shrugged and scratched behind his ear. “Magic?”

Sweetie and Scootaloo rolled their eyes while Apple Bloom snickered. “That’s right, there’s always a spell, right Sweetie? Go blast him with somethin’ ta make him go longer or whatever it is adults do.”

“Euck, no way. He’s family, and I don’t know that kind of magic yet. Maybe I never will,” Sweetie shrugged and began to tap her rear hoof.

Apple Bloom looked at Sweetie Belle. “Okay, hold yer reins, Ah’m almost done, Sweetie.”

“I’m trying! Seeing you go is making it worse,” Sweetie complained and Snickers shook his head, walking to the doorway.

“Mom? Bathtime!” He called out.

“Be right there,” Rarity called up. Sweetie carefully moved over the squat toilet and checked her hoof placement before she grabbed her tail and looked at her friends for emotional encouragement.

“You got this, Sweetie,” Scootaloo said with Apple Bloom nodded beside her.

“Yeah, I didn’t do anything stupid this time,” Snickers joked and looked away as Sweetie started. He moved back to the door and watched Rarity reach the top of the stairs and he moved as she walked in.

“Oh, Sweetie, it’s so nice to see you going by yourself! Snickers, isn’t it nice to not have her hold onto your tail finally?”

Snickers blushed and nodded. “Yeah, surel,” he swished his tail, proud he had that much mental control over it now.

Rarity smirked and used her magic to turn on the water while adding a few drops of various scented oils. “Very well, then. Can I trust you all to turn the water off while I’m downstairs finishing the dishes?”

“Of course.” Scootaloo said then called loudly and happily stomped her hooves when the toilet flushed. “Sweetie did it! Whoo-hoo,” they all cheered and Rarity flashed her horn in praise as well.

“Congratulations, little sister! I knew you could do it,” Rarity hugged Sweetie and was joined by the others.

“Okay, I need to breathe,” Sweetie said with a giggle.

“This calls for a little ice cream after your bath to celebrate! I’ll prepare some while you clean up and have your fun.”

Stomps and cheers followed Rarity out of the bathroom. Scootaloo was the first in with help from her wings, followed by Apple Bloom who showed off the strength in her hind legs from learning to buck trees. Next was Snickers, who managed to hoof his elbows on the tub ledge and was pulled over the rim by the other fillies.

Sweetie was last, smartly grabbing the step stool by the sink and hopping over the edge with a cocky grin. “What, I have to be careful and Rarity loves me so much that she bought me a little stood to help me reach higher places.”

The water was knee deep and it was enough for Sweetie to be soaked by her herdmates. She tried to block her face with her forelegs, but the water just went over, under, and through since her legs weren’t thick enough to actually block water. When they were done splashing her they turned on one another and Sweetie ran between them and shook like a dog, coating them all with slightly smelly water.

“Bleh, gross, Sweetie,” Snickers coughed, “what is that flavor?”

Scootaloo and Apple Bloom winced and stuck out their tongues, dipping them at the same time under the faucet. “Ith thwet ang durk.”

“Ang thung-thing thinky.”

Snickers looked at Sweetie. Sweetie blushed and rubbed her foreleg with the other. “I kinda fell into the pond and somepony put some fish in it and I thought if I rolled in the dirt it would get the smell of fish off…”

Snickers gagged and shoved the other fillies from the water and dunked his head under, scrubbing his mane. He was shoved back out of the stream of water by Apple Bloom. “Gah, fish juice,” Snickers shouted and fell to his knees, reaching both forelegs to the ceiling. “Why must it be fish juice?! Bleh,” he fell over with a splash.

Scootaloo gasped with Apple Bloom and they both took a side by his head and carefully lifted him out of the water. “No… Sweetie Belle, how could you?” Scootaloo asked, a forehoof on her forehead.

“Ya did it, ya killed him! Ah can’t believe yer plan worked after all these months ‘a plannin’ yer plan.”

Sweetie grinned devilishly. “Mwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha… and another ha-ha-ha. Now I shall be herd alpha and none shall challenge me,” she stood proudly with her mane plastered across her cheek and neck.

Snickers gasped and the fillies holding him did the same. “Ah… it seems the cure was here all along, evil Mistress of Stinky Fish Water… the power of,” he poked Apple Bloom and pointed above them to a bar of soap in a soap dish. Apple Bloom got up and reached for it, sliding it out of its cradle and into the water with a splash. Snickers grabbed the soap and rubbed it between his hooves.

“Uh, the power of soap shall defeat you,” Snickers said and ran at Sweetie. She shrieked and tried to keep him at bay with splashes, but the tub wasn’t nearly large enough and he caught her, rubbing his soapy hooves into her side. A second later Scootaloo and Apple Bloom joined in, their hooves soapy and scrubbing Sweetie until she was sudsy and fluffy.

Scootaloo added some bubble soap to the water, then added six times as much more than was needed or required. She was stopped by everypony with a shout in worry and surprise when she was about to toss the bottle out of the tub without making sure it was closed tightly. The time seemed to fly by as they played, splashed, used soap and shampoo to turn their manes into various styles and create beards that brought them to tears laughing.

“Alright, little ones, bath time is over for the night,” Rarity called walking in and scanning the floor with sharp eyes for anything but water that was spilled from the bath.

“Awww… do we have to?” Snickers and the others said in unison, getting a round of giggles from the swimming foals.

Rarity pulled the stopper from the tub. “I’m sorry, but it must be so. You don’t want to turn all pruny, do you?”

“I don’t care if I turn into a raisin as long as I get to play in the bath some more,” Sweetie pouted.

“C’mon,” Scootaloo said excitedly, “remember? We get celebration ice cream!”

Snickers nodded in agreement. “And all we had to do was wait for Sweetie to pee,” he said and brought a blush to his aunts cheeks.

“Well… if I didn’t then we’d just be going to bed without ice cream,” Sweetie retorted as she was the first taken from the tub and covered with a towel. The others were treated the same and Rarity let her magic fade.

“Well, while you all debate the nuances of how this prize came to be, your prize will be melting and shall soon be soup.”

Four little voices started rambling as they each tried to dry themselves enough to leave the bathroom under Rarity’s harsh and specific gaze. Eventually all four foals made it downstairs and into the kitchen to see bowls and spoons set up, but no ice cream. “Oh, surely you think better of me,” Rarity said mirthfully as she opened the freezer. “I won’t serve melted ice cream, especially on such an important occasion. Now, who wants what flavor? I have about six gallons of each between here and the chests in the basement.”

After the treats and a story, the four CMC’s retired to Snickers’s room and crawled into his bed. “So, what’s this Sweetie’s talkin’ about you bein’ the snuggliest pony ever?” Apple Bloom asked.

“You sure she didn’t mean the ‘ugliest’?” Scootaloo asked and got a swat on her ear by Apple Bloom. “Ouch! I was just joking.”

“That ain’t funny, teasin’ our stallion like that,” Apple Bloom draped a foreleg over Snickers, “right?”

“Sure… why not?” Snickers said uncomfortably. “Hey, since I’m family with Sweetie Belle, how about she chooses who I… snuggle with,” he offered, the words embarrassing him as he spoke.

“Yeah, choose me, Sweetie! I’m older.” Scootaloo said.

Apple Bloom climbed over Snickers and sat on his side. “Only by a couple weeks, ya been my friend longer, Sweetie. Let him cuddle me!”

Sweetie sat up and glared at her friends. “Snickers isn’t some bag of bits we can fight over, let’s just ask him.”

Snickers looked between the six sets of eyes on him and gulped. “Can’t we just go to sleep?”

The fillies looked at one another and nodded. With Sweetie to his right and Scootaloo to his left, he turned to Sweetie and pulled her close, yawning with a squeak as he got comfortable. Until Scootaloo pulled him firmly and rolled him to face her, then flipped over and scooted back to him.

Sweetie crawled over him and jumped onto her friend starting a brief fight that he wouldn’t have a part in. He rolled away and off the bed, moved to the door and left the room to go to Rarity. “Mom,” he said, the word coming more naturally now that it ever had before and seeming less awkward as each day passed. He reared up and turned the handle, shoving the door open to find Rarity on her bed writing in her diary. “Can I sleep with you?”

“Oh, darling, whatever is the matter?” Rarity asked, then the sound of three fillies arguing and fighting entered her room. “Ah, fighting over you, I take it?”

Snickers nodded. “I don’t think I can do this herd thing… at least not yet. They’re always fighting over me and it’s too much right now,” Snickers said as he climbed onto the bed.

“Very well, but when your herdmates come in here, I’ll have to lie between you and you’re still going to be one filly short that needs your attention and cuddles.”

Snickers groaned. “Can’t there be a rotation or something? Some way I don’t have to fight with them all night?”

Rarity nodded. “That’s exactly how it works, actually. Good work figuring it out. You have two, one on each side, so you spend time holding them both or you lay and let them hold you. Then, later in the night, one of them switches and has their turn, or perhaps another night they sleep in different places. It’s the best way, and oftentimes the ones your aren’t holding or paying attention to will focus their attention on one another, so you don’t need to worry about the stress of dividing your attention.”

A quiet knock got their attention. “Hey, Snickers… can you come back to bed, we’re sorry we were fighting over you.”

Snickers gave Rarity a hug and followed Sweetie back to his bed. “Fine, but any more and I’ll sleep alone, got it?”

***

Snickers awoke to a tickling under his chin and he shivered with giggles, then looked down and his lips brushed against a very sleepy Scootaloo’s, waking her much faster. She blushed and pressed her hooves to his chest, hesitating whether to push him away or not before she leaned closer and kissed him intently.

It was short, chaste, and more than the colt could handle. Feeling a stirring under himself, Snickers leaned back from Scootaloo and into Apple Bloom, who was holding him tightly. He tried to move the covers over himself, but Scootaloo’s wings prevented them from moving any higher and he was trapped and exposed, unable to hide himself from prying eyes.

Glancing down between them, Scootaloo didn’t pay Snickers’s growing problem and mind and touched his cheek with her hoof. “That was my first real kiss,” she whispered to him and scooted closer. He felt the problem he had press between them and she nuzzled into him again, humming contentedly as their cheeks rubbed together, making the problem he was having worse. He felt it twitch and wanted to vanish at that very instant.

Snickers was blushing brightly and was confused as all hell, unsure of what was happening and how it wasn’t getting so much worse. Scootaloo wasn’t teasing him or even paying it any mind, like it wasn’t even there; even though he could feel her chest fluff against it. Reluctantly, still tired for it being very early in the morning, Snickers draped a leg over Scootaloo and drifted back to sleep.

The next time he woke up it was to the bed shaking from three fillies as they left Snickers’s room, leaving the drowsy colt unsure of what had happened the night before. He knew it would be a terrible moment ahead, but he knew he had to ask his mother about the previous night. He got out of bed and shook his body, stretched his legs, and did some squats to limber himself for the morning ahead before he left his room for the bathroom, only to find himself at the end of the line this time.

Snickers turned and left the room to wait outside the doorway and be left with his thoughts over the night before when Scootaloo nuzzled him while he was in thought, giving him a quick kiss on his cheek and buzzing her wings afterward. “H-hey… um, about last night. I don’t want you thinkin’ I’m sappy or anything, alright?”

Snickers nodded and touched his cheek where she’d kissed him. “Yeah, you’re too tough to be sappy,” he said and let a smile crease his lips. Scootaloo nodded and walked past him, stopping and swaying her hips and tail so it would brush against his foreleg, a fine effort on her part. She giggled and ran back into the room and started whispering to her friends and they shared giggles.

Snickers leaned against the wall and let his mind wander on his feelings for a pony filly, something days before he’d have found awful were now endearing and worrying. He turned and ran downstairs to the kitchen. “Mom?!” Snickers shouted when he entered and stopped at the entrance when he saw a stack of pancakes almost as tall as he was with plates for each of them around the table. Syrups, chocolate chips, creams, and berries were set up, all ready to go on the breakfast disks that almost curtailed his mindset.

“Snickers? Whatever’s the matter? I have breakfast ready, if you’re concerned about food before your first day of school,” Rarity said without and worry as she flipped a pancake for him to see.

“No… I think,” he hesitated and felt a pit in his stomach at what he was realizing, “I think I love Scootaloo,” he finished weakly.

The pan and spatula in Rarity’s magic fell to the floor as she gaped at him and silence filled the room. Rarity took a step closer and started to smile. “Well… that’s nice to hear, son. You didn’t happen to realize this during any untoward activities last night, did you?”

Snickers flinched back. “No! No way… I…” he looked down and pawed the floor, “she kissed me when I woke up to her nuzzling me and,” he blushed and his voice cracked, “it came out, but it’s weird,” Snickers looked up and met Rarity’s firm gaze, “she didn’t do anything, just hugged me with it between us… and then we fell back asleep. Is that a normal thing for fillies to do?”

Rarity pressed her hoof between her eyes. “No, and yes. Come with me to the back room, I’ll discuss this quickly,” she said and followed him to the room adjacent that led to one of her work rooms. “Snickers, a stallion’s penis is a normal thing and everypony knows what they look like and what they are used for since they can crawl.

“When in a herd it has many uses,” she held up a hoof when Snickers looked irate and opened his mouth, “this isn’t a sex talk, per se. You’ve made it clear you know plenty about the topic, but nuances seem to be lost or are yet to be learned. When in a relationship with a mare, if you extend and don’t intent to mate; then it’s seen as a truly romantic gesture.

“It’s something ingrained in mares from ages before recorded time amongst all the tribes, that a stallion that shows himself, while close to his mare, and doesn’t intend to mate, is showing the greatest form of restraint and respect for his mare and is waiting for their readiness, willingness, and receptiveness.

“It’s something made even more pronounced since the Day of Sorrow so long ago, but what you did by showing last night was one of the most romantic things a stallion can do for his mare… you essentially showed Scootaloo that you are willing to wait as long as it takes for her to be ready before you sire their foals.”

Snickers felt his mouth open and while his mind was blank, the list of ways to describe his dislike of the newfound information was vast. “Fuck.”

…

Bellies full of food and saddle bags cinched tight, another bit in his jar as well, the little herd made their way to school and left Rarity home alone to worry about the future of her family and the foal she was finally bonding with.

Rarity cleaned up and ate several more pancakes as she worried and cleaned until she felt bloated. Cursing her habit, Rarity threw the remaining pancakes away and put on her own saddlebags and shoes. Heavy and made of a single piece of steel, she wasn’t very happy with them, but it was better than nothing on the dirt and gravel roads of rural Ponyville.

Rarity made her way through the market and to Fluttershy’s cottage where the timid mare was humming and feeding some birds in a tree higher than Rarity felt comfortable climbing, much less flying; even with magical wings.

“Oh, Fluttershy? Do you have a moment?”

Fluttershy flinched and dropped half the various dried bugs and seeds from her forelegs onto Rarity’s head and mane. After a loud scream that scattered birds and critters for a quarter mile and the help of Fluttershy and some squirrels, Rarity’s mane was at least dried bug free, as far as they could tell. The seeds, sadly, were there to stay until Rarity got home.

“Thank you for the help, darling. If I knew you were feeding creatures dried insects, I wouldn’t have stood under you.”

Fluttershy giggled into her hoof. “I understand, really I do. I’m sorry you got seeded,” she snickered, “Rarity. I hope it… comes out fine.”

Fluttershy winced when Rarity swatted her with a rolled up magazine she was carrying in her saddlebags. “That’s not very funny,” Rarity snerked, “okay, it’s a little funny. At least it was a skilled pony I trust that planted their seed in my mane and across my lovely face and not some stranger.”

Both mares giggled and tittered at their naughty jokes. “I’m sorry, Rarity. I don’t usually joke like that, but some of the animals are in season and their commentary is quite colorful.”

Rarity sighed. “I understand. In fact, that’s part of the reason I’ve come by today.”

Fluttershy inhaled, exhaled quickly, and grinned. “Oh, this is wonderful news! Is she already mated? When did it happen? Do you need me to supervise to make sure it takes?” Fluttershy asked and flapped her wings while prancing.

“Fluttershy, that is my sister you’re talking about! The last thing she needs is supervision when she is of age and who she chooses is her business,” Rarity said aghast.

Fluttershy ‘eep’ed and froze, falling to the ground. She covered her head with her wings and whimpered. “I… I’m sorry, I thought you meant Opalescence. Please, don’t be mad at me.”

Rarity sighed in relief and moved to help her friend stand up. “I’m not upset, I just misunderstood. My little Opal has preventative measures so she doesn’t go into season yet, she has to keep her feline figure for the time being and I can’t help take care of a litter of kittens. Anyway, the reason I’m here is that it seems Snickers has been in a herd with the CMC, as you know.”

“Yes,” Fluttershy said turning her head and hiding behind her curl, “most ponies do. It’s been very therapeutic for him and has helped him acclimate to life as a pony, since he still believes he’s some other creature.”

“Yes, yes, aliens trading bodies from different universes. Filly stories in cheap graphic novels, what concerns me is Scootaloo kissed Snickers while in bed last night and he,” Rarity used a forehoof to draw a straight line while raising her eyebrows suggestively.

“Oh? Oh! Oh, my… they didn’t have sex, did they? Oh, no,” Fluttershy hovered and covered her mouth with her forehooves, “you didn’t find out from… leakage, did you?”

“Oh, thank Celestia, no… Snickers told me about the event and that Scootaloo merely went back to sleep with him and the others, who seemed to be none the wiser. At least they will be until later, you know how fillies talk and colts gossip.”

Fluttershy landed and looked around the canopy. “Well, I certainly know enough about sex, but what it sounds like is he just showed her a little romance. It’s not uncommon for colts to do that from time to time, especially when learning about affection in herds.”

Rarity started to walk around the cottage to the back door. “Yes, but this is Scootaloo. The same filly with abandonment issues that’s looking for a male to stay in her life, as I heard you and Rainbow talking of the other day. Possibly falling in love with the same colt that doesn’t seem to understand the herding dynamics ingrained in us all from birth, that also happens to be fast falling into puppy love with Scootaloo!”

Fluttershy’s eyes widened and she bit her bottom lip in worry. “Oh, my. That is problematic… First a kiss, then the romantic action… they spend a lot of time together as well,” Fluttershy followed Rarity and stepped on the white mare’s flat tail, stopping her from entering her home. “I’m sorry, Rarity, but I have to go speak with Rainbow Dash. This is an issue we’ll both have to work with, I only hope it’s not too late to halt the bonding they’re feeling.”

Rarity waved her friend off as Fluttershy took off into the sky. Sighing loudly and letting it turn into an unladylike groan, Rarity turned and began the fifteen minute march back to town, upset her friend left before she could talk about anything else or plan a spa day.

***

Walking in pace with Scootaloo and Apple Bloom brushing their coats against his sides and Sweetie Belle just past Scootaloo, he was led to the schoolhouse, but stopped just past the market when Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon moved from around a house to block their path.

“Hey, blank flanks,” Diamond Tiara looked at Snickers with stitches across her muzzle. Silver Spoon avoided eye contact with any of the CMC, choosing to take a more submissive posture to the entire conflict approaching. “I didn’t think you’d be taking this weak little colt to school, can he even learn, or is his head full of too much muscle and it squished his brains out?”

Diamond looked back to Silver Spoon. “Right, Silver Spoon?” Silver nodded weakly while looking at the ground. “See, even my best friend agrees that you’re just a dumb colt that got lucky. Why, I bet that if I tried to hit you, you’d just run away crying when I won.”

“Try me,” Snicker said in a tone that made his friends step away.

“Snickers, don’t do this. Ya promised ya wouldn’t fight anymore,” Apple Bloom advised.

“Forget that, make ‘em eat rocks, Snickers! Woo-hoo,” Scootaloo chirped and whooped. Sweetie stood back, worrying about the outcome.

“Shut up, losers. One hit is all it’ll take and you’ll bow to me like the colt you are,” Diamond said marching up to Snickers.

“Diamond, don’t do this,” Silver Spoon said, finally looking up.

Diamond ignored Silver Spoon until she was a leg’s length away. She squatted and pulled back a foreleg, lunged, and missed when Snickers leaned to the side. Not expecting to hit air, Diamond lost her balance and fell forward, snout first onto the road. Snickers, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle ‘ooo’ed, feeling Diamond’s pain.

Apple Bloom moved and tried to help the pink filly up, but got shoved away. Diamond turned back to the other foals and they all, except Snickers, grimaced. Blood was streaming slowly from the opened wound on her muzzle and now a bloody snout added to it. “You’re so dead for this!” Diamond screamed and started to charge at Snickers, stopping in mid air when she was taken in a green magical aura.

“Oh, I think not young filly," a mare said from a window above them. "I know you, Diamond Tiara, and I'm taking you straight to your father and telling him you were attacking a colt for no reason. Go to school, kids, I've got it from here," the mare said while she hoisted Diamond up to her window.

Silver Spoon looked at the window, then took several steps away from Snickers when she noticed he was closer to her. "I… I'm sorry about last time and… this time. Please, don't hold it against Diamond, she's never lost at anything before."

Snickers took a step closer to Silver Spoon and backed the filly against as house wall. Silver cowered down as low as she could go even before he came close to her.

Snickers looked at Silver Spoon and then trotted up to her. She whined and lay on the ground covering her head and shivering, nearly wetting herself in fear.

"Hey," Snickers said softly, "we're cool."

Silver Spoon peeked from under her legs and winced back when she saw a hoof pointed at her, then she noticed the smile he sported. Silver looked past him at the fillies he was with and saw their uneasy but encouraging expressions. Silver Spoon reached out and slowly interlocked their pasterns and was helped to her hooves.

“Look, I know we keep meeting in the wrong, but you’re all right. That walking cunt that farts rainbows is the problem,” he said and then looked back when he heard his herdmates tapping the ground and looking at him with various forms of disappointment. “Oh, yeah,” he rolled his eyes and droned, “I’m sorry for swearing and I’ll do my best to not do it again.”

Silver Spoon, despite herself, giggled behind pursed lips and shook her head a little. “No, it’s alright. Diamond Tiara swears all the time, but never in public and never to a colt,” she looked down and noticed her braid was speckled with dirt. “Like, oh no! My braid is all dirty, and stuff… like, this is just the worst, right Diamond?”

Silver winced at the habitual comment and expected retribution from the impulsive colt she had come to know. Instead he was walking away from her. “You coming, or are you just gonna whine about your hair?”

Silver patted her braid absently several times, then ran to catch up to the herd. “Um… like, I’m not totally into you, just so you know. I’m just going the same way,” Silver said.

Scootaloo buzzed her wings and ran around Snickers getting muzzle to muzzle with Silver. “You better not be into my colt, Silver, or I’ll f- er… fight you,” Scootaloo said keeping her angry demeanor. Snickers grinned at Scootaloo, knowing she was a second away from saying something he’d approve of.

Scootaloo, keeping her angry glare on Silver Spoon, moved to the other side of Snickers again.

“Like, whatever, Scoota-loser. You don’t scare me, so just stay on that side of your hunk…” Silver slowed to a stop, a blush growing brighter as seconds passed before she turned a different way and galloped on her own path.

The herd watched Silver run away and then burst into laughter. Scootaloo leaned in close to Snickers and whispered in his ear. “Fuck.”

Snickers still laughed, but his attention was on Scootaloo and he felt the desire to kiss her again and show how much she meant to him. Thankfully, Sweetie Belle stepped between them unknowing of what was happening between the two. “That was funny, right?” Sweetie asked and bumped her flank against Snickers’s. “Let’s get to school, I think we can tease her about something finally.”

Scootaloo shook her head and stood opposite Sweetie, who was sidled with Snickers. Snickers kept peeking over Sweetie to look at Scootaloo. “Hey, Snickers?” Apple Bloom asked. When Snickers turned to look at her his lips met hers and their eyes widened, freezing for a second before they separated.

Apple Bloom looked at Sweetie Belle’s surprised face and then to Scootaloo’s scowl. Looking back at Snickers’s still puckered lips, Apple Bloom tackled him and pressed her lips to his in a much more forceful kiss. The farm filly was able to resist at first, but her herd sisters were able to shove her off Snickers.

“Ah… Ah’m sorry,” Apple Bloom said and noticed several ponies and a couple other foals on their way to school looking at their group. “Ah dunno what happened just now. It was mah first kiss and it was so warm and Ah was flutterin’ all inside mah body and under my tail that Ah… Ah’m so sorry, Snickers,” she said helping him up.

Sweetie looked at Snickers and snorted. “Well, he’s still smiling, so that’s something to be proud of, I guess,” she said derisively and shoved Apple Bloom.

Scootaloo cleared her throat and glanced down, the other fillies noticing what shouldn’t have bothered to show up to the gathering and they quickly sided him, blushing. “That, was great,” Snickers said breathily and leaned over to nuzzle Apple Bloom, who returned the favor with a sigh and a little nip under his chin.

Above them, Rainbow Dash looked down and chewed on her forehoof. “Oh no… this is not good. Where’s Fluttershy when I need her? This is really bad.”

Fluttershy panted as she landed beside Rainbow on the same cloud. “Rainbow Dash, I was looking for you. There’s something you need to know about Snickers and the herd.”

Author's Note

Oh no... Snickers is adapting to life as a pony, but cultural nuances are starting troubles that his therapists have to nip in the bud ASAP. Puppy love can be a rough thing, but remember this is how foals learn to be adults, not to do adult things, before you start worrying about foalcon or the like!

School Day - Part 1

The little herd reached the schoolhouse and Snickers stopped to look at it nervously. “C’mon, Snickers,” Sweetie Belle said, “we’re gonna be here with you the whole day, even if we don’t sit by each other.”

“Wait, we can’t sit by each other?” Snickers asked and looked side to side at the fillies he was with.

“Nope,” Scootaloo said matter of factly, “it’s usually first come first served on Mondays and the rest of the week we keep those seats. Most of the year we’ll just like where we sit, but then Miss Cheerilee will move us around if we’re being bothersome or if she feels we need ‘interact more’ with other foals,” she said making air quotes with her wings and forehooves.

Apple Bloom walked ahead. “C’mon, we’ll try to sit beside each other. If we get in now--”

“Hey, there’s the k-i-s-s-i-n-g herd!” A foal shouted from the playground and after a second or two of foals looking around their attention fell on Snickers’s herd.

There was a hushed round of whispers then a deafening silence before the whole playground was filled with a familiar chant. “Kissing, Kissing, in a tree! They’re all special somepony’s. First come the herd, then comes the marriage, then they mate until there’s a baby in a carriage!”

Even Snickers couldn’t stop the blush that colored his cheeks at the silly, childish chant that was similar to what he knew and had heard on occasion back home. Only this seemed more personal since it was, actually, personally directed at him and his herd. Snickers was at a loss on what to do against up to seventeen children all teasing him for his life choices.

He couldn’t swear them down, because it would make so much more trouble and give every one of them more ammunition for later. He couldn’t shout or attack for the same reason. He rocked between his hooves and noticed his fillies trying to hide their faces behind their forelegs. In a moment that he’d never forget, he felt a deep seeded instinctive desire to protect them from the bullies in the most irrational way a child with adult experiences in his position could.

Snickers moved to Scootaloo, picked her up so they were both standing on their hind legs, and pressed his lips to hers. The yard fell silent, Scootaloo’s wings went rigid; that was when Scootaloo felt his breath on her snout and inhaled, accepting his breath. Scootaloo’s hind legs went so weak she collapsed like a sack of potatoes.

Landing on all four hooves, Snickers sidestepped the mindless pegasus and wrapped a foreleg around Apple Bloom’s neck and pressed his lips to hers. Unlike with Scootaloo, Apple Bloom reciprocated and in a sudden twist Snickers wasn’t expecting, she wrapped a foreleg over his neck and turned quickly so she was cradling him in her foreleg. Their eyes were wide open and they looked at one another the whole six seconds the kiss lasted.

With a surprising pull, Apple Bloom righted Snickers to his hooves and the hapless colt stumbled over his own legs while the farm filly guffawed at the stirring emotions roiling inside her.

Wind, rustling leaves… the creak of a see-saw. Not another sound could be heard nearby, not even from a trio of gossiping mares that were passing who stopped at the teasing and gawked at the kisses.

“Students, class will begin shortly,” Miss Cheerilee called from the doorway, taking in the quiet of the area with furrowed eyebrows. She looked at everypony and noticed they were all looking at Sweetie Belle and her friends, the faint memory of a rumor that the CMC was in a herd with the colt she’d tested ran through her mind. “And Snickers, it’s so nice to see you again,” she called out and stepped down the stairs onto the dirt road.

Snickers was blushing and had a drunk look about him, bringing new worries to the teacher. She’d read his report and knew he may have an issue with drinking. Snickers blinked and grinned at her, sitting on the ground. “Hey, Miss Cherry,” Snickers said and snickered, “can I pop you?”

Miss Cheerilee gasped and covered her mouth, glancing around to make sure no one heard him. She swore she heard a quiet laugh from above her, but didn’t see anypony when she looked up. “Well, Snickers, I hope you have a good excuse for what you just said, otherwise I’ll have to call Rarity to come talk about this.”

Snickers shook his head. “Nah, Ah’m ‘gewd’,” he slurred his speech and giggled when he saw Scootaloo slowly picking herself up on shaky legs. Apple Bloom was standing as tall and as proud as a show pony on stage, daring anypony to say anything about what had just happened. No foal took the challenge.

“Miss Cheerilee,” Sweetie Belle finally said, breaking the growing tension, “we’re okay and sorry…” she gave the best pouty face she could without going over the top, “we were being teased and then Scootaloo kissed Snickers and then they both got kinda loopy,” she said and looked at her teacher, eyes full of sorrow. “I promise we won’t do this again, right?” Sweetie asked and got a nod from her herdmates.

Miss Cheerilee looked between the four and sniffled. “Fine, but I’d like to see you inside before class begins, Snickers. It’s about your test and placement.”

Snickers was getting his bearings again and blinked owlishly several times. “Oh… yeah… wait, Miss Cheerilee,” Snickers said facing her. “I’m really sorry about what I said just now, it slipped out and I couldn’t put it back in once it happened.”

There was another laugh from above and this time several ponies looked up to find the source before giving up. “It’s alright, sweetie. Just try to keep your language thoughtful and your mind on the task of learning with your peers, nothing else,” Cheerilee said with a little hint of disapproval at the end.

Snickers nodded. “I won’t. I mean, I will. I mean, I’ll be good.”

Miss Cheerilee smiled widely. “Great, I’ll see you inside in just a minute then.”

Snickers looked at the school yard and noticed some of the foals began to start playing again, leaving Snickers and his herd to head to the schoolhouse with awkward blushes and feeling stirring in their minds and bodies that they didn't understand, and in Snickers’s case he didn’t want to have again, but couldn’t stop.

Snickers kept thinking about the kissing he was getting and how he lost himself to instinct so much over the past couple days. Being around the fillies had brought out a desire at times at protect them through advice or action such as helping them build a bench to convincing them that trying to inspect the dam were only effective to a point and the safety of dam inspection was something that had to be learned over time, not just on the spot.

Not to mention the security he felt. There was something about being with them that emboldened him to do things he wouldn’t normally do; perhaps in his former life as an adult or as a highly intelligent colt. He was ready and willing to kiss two fillies in front of over a dozen onlookers just to prove a point that he was the alpha male in the herd and wouldn’t be challenged.

Now, Snickers was walking into the schoolhouse alone, without his herdmates by his side for the first time that morning. His eyes lingered on Scootaloo, who looked back at him longingly and was obviously saddened to watch him go while Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle were whispering to one another.

Snickers turned his attention forward and walked into the threshold to a new chapter in his new life. “Hello, Miss Cheerilee. Should I sit on my rump or in a chair?”

Cheerilee was sitting at her desk, intently reading something. “On a chair, one doesn’t sit in a chair…” she said and blinked, looking up to Snickers and realizing he was there.

“Oh, I was gonna try digging a hole in the damn chair and climbing into it, thanks for the info,” Snickers said. His ears drooped at the look he got from Cheerilee.

“It sounds like you need a soaping,” Cheerilee said and noticed the sound of him gagging through closed lips, “but that’s not what we’re here about. I’ll have you know, though, that I am permitted to correct attitudes as I see fit as a teacher. Normally I take a passive stance, but with language like yours, I’d gladly be more authoritative. Now, take a seat front and center.”

Cheerilee pointed to the seat all normal children across all realities hated and Snickers sat at the desk, surprised it was actually comfortable and actually molded to his body and sitting posture. “Woah,” he exclaimed when the seat moved slightly conforming and moving him closer to the desk, but not too close, then softened as though he were sitting on a cushion, “what the fucking shit?! This chair’s fucking awesome,” Snickers said with a toothy grin, looking past his blank flank.

A stack of papers slapped onto the desk getting his attention just a second before he felt a sharp pain on his left ear. Snicker glanced aside and saw Cheerilee biting his ear and when she tugged he had no choice other than to move. She guided him under her; with his ear in Cheerilee’s teeth and her barrel pressing into his back, he was led out of the schoolhouse and around the side towards a water pump.

Scootaloo galloped up with worry across her face and in her features. “Snickers, what’d you do? Oh no,” she whimpered, “you said bad words again, didn’t you? Miss Cheerilee, he’s sorry and won’t do it again, honest…” Scootaloo pleaded. Her friends ran to her side and walked along Snickers’s guide.

“I’m sorry,” he said and gasped in pain when Cheerilee tugged his ear a little more.

“Girls, keep back. Snickers is in trouble, not you.” Cheerilee said to the three fillies who stopped and watched their colt walked to the spigot.

Scootaloo, in a rare show of public emotion, turned her face into Apple Bloom’s shoulder and whispered something Snickers couldn’t hear. Snickers did notice several foals paying him attention from across the yard and around him from their own areas playing various games in the grassy land.

Cheerilee let his ear flop free and Snickers tried to rub it, but his forelegs were trapped behind hers. Snickers wondered how she was going to soap him, slightly glad she’d get a taste of the punishment until he saw it was soap on a rope that she grabbed with her lips, not teeth.

The soap dangled four inches from his muzzle. “Do you know what to do, or should I hold you down and teach you?” Cheerilee asked with a little remorse.

Snickers sighed a sigh that he felt in his heart and then leaned forward, opened his mouth, and bit onto the bar, holding it in his mouth. Cheerilee held the rope and foals chanted a count through twelve. At the number, Cheerilee tugged the soap and he let it fall from his mouth, the horrid flavor of cheap generic soap filled his mouth and he tongue had rubbed against it in a much more natural way than Rarity had done to him on his first day.

Snickers had the feeling he’d be getting a bit or two in the jar when he got home for what he was going to tell his mom about her soaping method.

“What do you have to say, Snickers?” Cheerilee said from above him.

Snickers looked up and saw her head cocked to the side and her eyes looking down on him again. “I’m sorry for swearing, Miss Cheerilee. I can’t promise it won’t happen ever again here, but I’ll do my best to not let it.”

Cheerilee nodded and swung the soap up and back onto its cradle. She lifted a foreleg slightly and the pressure holding him was eased enough for him to squeeze out from under her and to the faucet. Scootaloo and Apple Bloom had gotten there while he apologized and had just started pumping fresh, icy cold water for him to rinse his mouth out with.

Snickers felt a smack on his flank and he sputtered water out of his muzzle and dipped his head under the stream of water, dowsing him. “What the hay were you thinking?” Sweetie scolded him when he looked back to see who had struck him. Snickers went back to rinsing and swishing water to get the soap from between his front teeth. “You were in there for thirty seconds! I have to tell Rarity about that, and I hate being a tattletale, but that wasn’t a good thing to do.”

Snickers stepped back and looked at Sweetie Belle, then to the teacher behind her by a few steps watching and making sure everything was okay. “Snickers, come back in when you’re done and we’ll go over your scores. I apologize for this, but standards have to be set and swearing is not tolerated in Equestrian schools, and it’s not by order of the EEA, it’s common sense.”

Cheerilee turned and went back into the schoolhouse while Snickers finished rinsing his mouth to the best of his ability. Snickers stepped back and shook his head to dry it somewhat and stepped around Sweetie Belle. “Hey, where do you think you’re going?” Scootaloo shouted and ran to him. “Are you okay, hun? Let me see your mouth, do you have any soap you missed? I can’t believe she did that to you,” she said and hugged him before he could answer any of her questions.

Apple Bloom shoved him at his shoulder. “Yer lucky Ah didn’t hear it, or Ah’d give yer snout a good whack fer that one. Scootaloo, let him go so he can get started,” she said and tapped Scootaloo’s foreleg. “Snickers, Ah swear that if ya keep swearin’, Ah’m not gonna be part of this herd no more.”

Snickers pouted when she said that. “Don’t shit about it,” Scootaloo whispered into his ear behind her hoof. Scootaloo finally stopped hugging him and brushed her lips across his as she backed up from him. She smiled slyly while Snickers wondered about what he’d just heard Scootaloo whisper.

He nodded to Scootaloo, Apple Bloom, then Sweetie Belle and walked after Miss Cheerilee back into the schoolhouse with talking that obviously included his name this time. Snickers took his seat and clenched his teeth, held his lips tight, and tried to ignore the seat molding to him. Miss Cheerilee tapped the papers on his desk with a proud smile.

“So, your scores are in and, I have to say that I’m very impressed. You have test scores worthy of getting you into high school, if you choose after you’re done here. Your math is better than mine to the point I had to have Twilight Sparkle help me with some of the answers you gave. Your knowledge of science, engineering, accounting, and writing are on the level of some professors Twilight and I know of.

“Given your age, though, you’re not expected to know a lot about sociological matters and geography as much as an adult, which is why you’re going to be staying here until you show an aptitude with those areas, and build better skills with social interactions. I understand you’ve joined your first herd,” she asked.

“Yes, with Scootaloo and Apple Bloom… and I guess Sweetie, but she was there before I was.”

“It’s fine,” Miss Cheerilee said and took the papers in a hoof and pressed them to her chest while walking back to her desk, “you’re not actually family so it’s not incest,” she said and her ears perked. “Oh, incest is sex between family members. Oh… do you know what sex it?” Cheerilee asked with concern that she was rushing topics.

Snickers smiled slyly. “Better than most ponies older than you would know, I’m sure.” The papers fell to the floor. Cheerilee turned to face him and he rolled his eyes. “Not with them,” he gestured out the doorway to the three fillies sitting in a triangle and playing what looked like pattycake. “I used to have sex all the time, though. But, it was a while ago since I got some action,” Snickers looked down and remembered last night and Scootaloo’s body pressed against that part of himself.

“Snickers,” Cheerilee said with a shaky voice, “y-you’re s-serious? And you’re not even six yet?”

Snicker shrugged. “I’m in my forties, but now I’m probably five or six. Way too young to get my…” he glanced out the door and then back to his future teacher, “yeah, I won’t be doing that part of herding until I’m older, so don’t worry about that. I can’t take their innocence, just look at them,” he gestured to his fillies and Cheerilee sighed in relief.

“That’s great to hear, but if you ever have any worries or concerns that you may have that desire, please speak to an adult. Even adults without physical experience can offer better advice than you’d expect. And if you have urges that compel you to want to have sex, please,” Cheerilee said sternly, “speak to an adult as soon as they happen. Even if it’s in the middle of the night or during class. I’m willing to take a private moment to discuss such matters with you and have you get the help you need to prevent anything from happening that you may not be ready for.”

Snickers sighed. “Yeah, foals, I get it. If I start to get the urge to hump a filly, don’t. That is not going to be a problem,” he said slowly and clearly. “I respect females too much to just jump on them to sate my desires. That happened to me too many times and I’ll geld myself before I rape somepony.”

Cheerilee was awash in a mix of pride for the colt, worry for his past, and concern for his future with what he’d just said.

Instead of continuing a potentially long and existential conversation, Cheerilee nodded and picked up the papers, put them on her desk, then called the other students in. Seeing Snickers in an unfavorable seat, Scootaloo rushed to sit behind him with her friends at her sides. Silver Spoon shoved her way to sitting in the seat to his left while Featherweight took a seat to his right, not really showing any interest in Snickers beyond a sidelong glance.

Silver, on the other hand, was looking at him from the corner of her eye and kept dropping things between them, leaning down to get the items and looking into his eyes every time. Silver also spent a lot of time playing with her braid and even took her glasses off and brushed her forelocks a couple times while flipping her head and looking past him out the window, obviously trying to show off to him.

The sound of quiet growling from Scootaloo kept stopping Silver’s ineffective advances to the point that the grey filly had once turned back and stuck her tongue out at Scootaloo when Cheerilee wasn’t looking.

“So, class, who can tell me when Alliance Worker negotiated the end of the feud between the Acorn family and the Pine Nut family?” Cheerilee asked the class. There was complete silence until a voice from directly behind him spoke up.

“Wasn’t it 2113?” Scootaloo asked, getting Snickers’s attention and surprise, not expecting her to answer or to be acknowledged by Miss Cheerilee.

“Exactly! Thank you Scootaloo, for paying attention last week. So, during the treaty, Alliance was able to…” Miss Cheerilee started writing on the board with her tail to the class.

Snickers turned back and winked at Scootaloo, catching Sweetie Belle’s nod of approval. Scootaloo curled her tail around herself until most of her tail was on her lap. Scootaloo pressed a forehoof through the hairs until she felt her soft flesh covering her firm muscular flexible tail and her mind started to wander to the previous night and touching Snickers while he was asleep and since she didn’t have anywhere to move her forelegs, one went over his side while the other moved and gently held her stallions gift to mares. His mares. Her.

If I give myself to him, he won’t leave me. I can be with him and neither of us’ll be lonely anymore, and I’ll get to be a real mare, and maybe I’ll get my cutie mark. A heart with his initials would be nice.

Scootaloo whimpered as she stroked her tail until a pencil landed on her desk and rolled between her legs, bringing her back to reality before she got too far into her fantasy. Scootaloo looked left and right to her grinning friends that knew full well what Scootaloo was doing.

Sweetie pointed across the tables and they all noticed Silver Spoon with her tail in her lap and her hoof brushing through her tail hairs. The trio snickered and giggled quietly, getting Miss Cheerilee’s attention for a second quieting them immediately. Apple Bloom leaned to Scootaloo and whispered, “Ah wonder if she’s thinkin’ of our herd alpha, too, lover girl.”

Scootaloo blushed and shook her head in denial, daring to say nothing or she’d get all the wrong kinds of attention. Scootaloo let her tail go and it fell naturally, the pencil was carefully grabbed by Scootaloo’s hoof and then she blushed, sliding it into her desk because it was unusable until it dried.

Sweetie Belle leaned to Scootaloo next. “Hey, you better not be tickling you tail with my nephew.”

Scootaloo sat straight and seemed like the perfect student for the next three minutes, listening to the teacher prattle on about number counting systems and their various uses. Scootaloo, instead, spent a lot of her time recalling the feeling of sharing a breath with her first colt, who was the most important colt in the world, because he was hers; she just happened to be sharing him with her best friends.

“Okay, recess time,” Miss Cheerilee eventually called after hours passed and little information was passed on to Snickers he didn’t already know or simply didn’t care about. The foals in class rushed from the single room and out into the sunlight. Snickers and his herd played tag with others, ate a snack, played on some playground equipment, and talked with other classmates about being in a herd and how long it might take for them to start kissing their future herdmates.

Snickers noticed with a bit of unhappiness that the talk across the schoolyard had a lot more implied sexual undertones to it than he’d expected and he worried he was the sole cause for it by his actions before school with Scootaloo and Apple Bloom.

Nearing the end of the long recess, Snickers sat with Scootaloo nuzzling him casually with Applebloom doing the same from either side of him as they lay in the shade of a tree. Snickers and his fillies looked around the schoolyard and sighed, never having felt more content, comfortable, and safe then he did at that moment.

Sweetie Belle giggled and walked beside Scootaloo. “So, did you tell Snickers you were tickling your tail during class?”

Scootaloo gasped, freezing in place with her eyes darting between Snickers and Sweetie Belle. Apple Bloom snickered.

Snickers looked between Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle. “What’s that mean?”

Apple Bloom fell to her side laughing, Sweetie giggled like a schoolgirl, which she was, and Scootaloo lay her bright red head on the grass and covered her head with her forelegs. Snickers had a slight inkling of an idea what they meant, but he dismissed it. “C’mon, tell me! Now I gotta know,” Snickers insisted far more than he was pleading by anypony that heard him, for certain.

Sweetie tried prodding Scootaloo into answering, finally giving up and choosing to tell Snickers. “Well, every filly gets these feelings that aren’t the same for colts,” she started and in Snickers’s mind, he regretted asking since the answer was going to deal with parts of a small mare he didn’t want to discuss, but out of respect he didn’t stop her.

“When a filly has these feelings,” Sweetie continued, “there are a few safe ways to make them go away. Miss Cheerilee helped us learn some ways while Doctor Cottage taught the colts later in the class. One of the easiest is for us to brush our tail with the round part of our hooves until the feeling gets really big, then goes away.”

Snickers sighed quietly. “So, masturbation, then?” he asked and this time it was Sweetie Belle’s turn to look shocked.

Apple Bloom tapped Snickers’s leg. “You can’t say that, it’s a grown up word for mating.”

Snickers rolled his eyes and elbowed Scootaloo. “It’s a word that means you touch yourself because its more efficient than having someone help you.”

Scootaloo groaned and lifted her head, flecks of grass falling onto the ground when she lifted her head. “Okay, I’m busted! I did it,” Scootaloo said and then became defensive. “But both of you do it too. I bet even Snickers does it.”

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle quickly came to the same conclusion, they hadn’t bothered to explore further during their filly talks when Snickers wasn’t around. “Yeah, every filly does. Miss Cheerilee says it’s okay during class as long as we don’t bother other ponies or interrupt the less, but when has Snickers done it? We never see him do it,” Sweetie asked openly, embarrassing Snickers into stunned silence.

“You’re right. He’s had almost no time alone with us there, when could he?” Scootaloo asked, gladly deflecting the conversation off of herself.

The fillies shared a look, then cautiously looked at Snickers. “Or how,” Sweetie Belle asked for them. Scootaloo looked at Snickers slyly while Apple Bloom cocked her head and twitched her ear, both trying to get an answer from him without words.

“So…” Scootaloo hummed, “how do colts tickle their tails?”

Apple Bloom smiled slowly. “Or, do ya tickle under yer tails? Them hangers gotta be good fer more than show, right?”

“Or is it your penis? Do you have to tickle that… thing?”

The fillies grimaced and actually leaned away from him a little. Scootaloo stuck out her tongue. “How do you walk around with those things, anyway? They just hang out whenever for no reason sometimes and they look weird.”

Apple Bloom agreed. “Yeah, and they’re so big! How d’ya not get’m stuck on the ground sometimes? Wouldn’t that hurt, like stoppin’ ya suddenly like that?”

“They’re not really made of sticks and stones, Apple Bloom, that’s just silly” Sweetie added, “mares just say they’re hard as a rock and something about morning wood. What do mares mean when they say that, Snickers?”

“Hey, that’s a good question,” Scootaloo said sternly, like she realized she asked but never got an answer, “how can a penis be made of rocks and wood? Does it change from morning to night?”

The fillies gasped, all realizing something at the same time. “Are all stallions actually cursed?!” Sweetie asked loudly. Scootaloo and Apple Bloom leapt to their hooves and stood beside Sweetie Belle leaving Snickers with nopony beside him and feeling alone and very on the spot.

“If yer cursed, does it spread ta mares when ya start matin’? Is that why mah cousin said it hurt ta walk after a date?”

Sweetie took a step back from Snickers. “Or why Rarity jokes about walking funny with her friends?”

Scootaloo frowned at Snickers, who was slack jawed and actually blushing so much he was feeling dizzy from all the blood rushing to his head. He was starting to hear a ringing after each question asked; and without time to think he colt brain was overloaded.

“Girls, I think,” Scootaloo said buzzing her wings twice, “that stallions have cursed penisus! And the cure is actually in a mare’s vagina, and that’s why stallions love to mate so much when they’re in a herd,” she said sagely and got agreeable hums from her friends beside her. “So, when we mate with Snickers, we can be his cure!”

The other fillies made retching sounds. “Gross! I don’t wanna mate until I’m at least seven or even nine! I’ll take my Silphium like rational mares until I’m ready to have a foal.”

“Me, too. Ah’m not lettin’ some stallion,” Apple Bloom looked at Snickers, “or colt… put anythin’ of his under my tail ‘til Ah’m ten! Ah’ve got responsibilities on the farm and who knows what’ll happen between when Ah have mah first estrus next year and when Ah’m ready ta foal.”

Both fillies looked at Scootaloo, who was looking at the sky and trying to not give an answer. “Well, Scootaloo. How you do feel about mating?” Sweetie Belle asked.

Scootaloo gulped loudly and then looked at her friends and bit her bottom lip, whining as the pressure she felt from her friends became unbearable. “I… don’t really see a problem waiting for Snickers to be ready,” she said weakly.

Snickers finally had had enough and passed out.

School Day - Part 2

“Oh, he’s waking up! Hurry, get the nurse,” Snickers heard a filly’s voice call out through the haze in his head. Clarity came back quickly and his eyes opened. Instinctively, Snickers tried to roll to his belly so he could get to his hooves, only to find out he had a strap across his barrel and another across his hips.

“What…” he asked as his situation was understood. “What the fuck?! Get the out of this fucking place, where the hell am I? Who the fuck are you?!” Snickers shouted at the grey filly that was backstepping quickly. “What the fuck is going on? What is this shit?” He shouted and struggled against the straps to no avail.

He stopped swearing and exchanged it for grunting and growling as he tried to get the straps off for several seconds. “Fucking god damned, cock sucking, whore, strap on sucking, cunts!" He shouted at the white band across his barrel that he couldn’t reach with his mouth or forehooves.

Snickers saw the grey filly, tears running down her cheeks behind her glasses, then he realized where he was and who she was. He fell silent and suddenly felt his rage fading, changing into regret. His eyes met Silver Spoon’s and his breath hitched at the sadness he saw in them. Silver Spoon wiped her eyes on her foreleg and stood up, leaning against the wall she was cowering against, and started to move slowly to the door; watching Snickers for anything else he might say or do.

“P-please, don’t go,” he said weakly, feeling a pain growing in his chest that he wondered about, “I’m sorry, Silver Spoon. Please, don’t leave me. I don’t want to lose you as a friend before we’ve become friends.” Snickers pleaded quietly. "I just panicked, I'm not mad at you, or anything."

Silver Spoon stopped and sniffled, tears started matting the fur on her face and a quiet sob broke the silence. “Y-you scared me… I,” she grimaced and Snickers looked where she was cowering and felt even worse, seeing a small puddle. “I think I should go.”

Snickers exhaled a shaky breath. “Please stay… please,” he whimpered and laid his head down, closed his eyes, and felt a chill on his cheek and the sensation of a tear under his eye.

The door opened and a nurse came in, happily at first until she saw the foals and their expressions. “What happened in here?” The nurse asked, looking between the two. “And who peed on the floor? Was that you, young filly?”

Snickers started to sob, covering his eyes and muzzle with his forelegs. “I’m sorry, Nurse Beating Heart… I had incon-sis-tanance,” Snickers heard Silver say.

“No,” he said and lifted his head to look at the mare and fillies. He noticed Sweetie Belle with the nurse. “I scared her when I woke up… I panicked and started yelling and… oh, Silver, I’m so sorry for scaring you,” he whined loudly and the look of guilty pain he expressed before hiding behind his forelegs again broke every female’s heart. They all rushed to Snickers, the nurse used her magic to unstrap him, and Sweetie climbed on to the table to hold him from behind. Silver reared up and put her muzzle under his chin breathing heavily and nuzzling him as she stopped crying and focused on Snickers’s feelings.

“There, there, Snickers. Auntie’s here, and I promise we’ll make you feel better. Don’t cry, okay?”

The sound of hoof falls loudly stomping on wood came from the hall outside the doorway and Miss Cheerilee stomped in the room. She looked at the scene and her anger subsided a little, but not enough. “Snickers… why, under Celestia’s glorious sun, were you thinking shouting in that manner with your classmates on the other side of that wall?” She pointed to a wall and the sound of chatter could be heard, muffled.

Snickers shook his head, Miss Cheerilee growled quietly and stomped a hoof, marching to the crying colt. She gently, slowly nuzzled him, brushing her snout from the end of his muzzle to his face, then under his foreleg to exhale a breath of hot air from her lungs onto his eyes.

Snickers stopped crying and sighed, calming down suddenly. He whimpered and sniffled loudly, then raised his head to sadly look at his frustrated teacher. “You’re still in big trouble for your language, obviously scaring Silver Spoon so badly she had an accident, disrupting class, and missing the rest of your first day of school.”

Snickers understood. “I get it, I wouldn’t want me around either,” he rolled to his belly looked around the room. It was all finely painted wood with a mural of a meadow after sunrise with foals playing just behind where he was facing.

“Now, now,” Nurse Beating Heart said placing a forehoof on his rear, “nopony said anything of the sort. You need time to recover from fainting after playing so much,” she said and Snickers didn’t correct her; he wasn’t about to get his auntie in trouble. “We’re just going to send you home to rest, alright?”

Snickers nodded and started looking at the mural, shaking every now and then; ignoring Sweetie right in front of him. Sweetie looked at him sadly, then to the others in the room. She got up and hopped from the bed beside Silver Spoon and nudged the grey filly. Silver stopped playing with her braid nervously and nodded to follow Sweetie from the room.

“Wait, girls,” Nurse Beating Heart said. “Miss Cheerilee, can I send them to get Rarity? It shouldn’t be more than fifteen minutes and Snickers should be taken home by an adult.”

Cheerilee exhaled and shook her head, looking at the back of Snickers’s mane. “I don’t see why not. Girls, go get Rarity. I’ll get you a pass so the truancy officer doesn’t bother you while you’re on your errand, but I’m adding the time you left so don’t play around, alright?” Miss Cheerilee said as she left the room with the fillies.

“I hope I can see you later, Snickers,” Silver Spoon said as she left the room and the colt she was obviously developing a crush on.

Taking their permission slips, Sweetie Belle and Silver Spoon trotted at a steady pace from the schoolhouse into town.

“So, Silver Spoon… are we kinda friends now?” Sweetie asked.

“Yeah, I always kinda liked you out of your dumb group. Now that you have that colt, though…” Silver let the silence hang and Sweetie looked at the grey filly and noticed her eyes weren’t moving, a tell that she was lost in thought.

“Hey, stop thinkin’ about my nephew like that,” Sweetie teased and bumped her flank to Silver’s.

“Ugh, don’t get your blank flank on me,” Silver snapped. Sweetie stepped away and almost into a stallion in the market shopping.

“Oh, excuse me, sir,” Sweetie Belle said. “Silver, why do you hate us so much? What’d we ever do to you?”

“Ugghhh, do we have to talk about this now?” Silver complained.

“Well, when will we ever talk about it if not now?” Sweetie replied quickly.

Silver Spoon stopped near a house, out of hoof traffic. “Fine, you wanna know why? First, your country bumpin is as bright as a stack of hay. She can’t form a single sentence without butchering it and making the speakers of old Ponish want to end her family line. Second,” Silver interjected before Sweetie could defend her friend, “your pegasus friend is as hard headed as iron.

“She doesn’t think before she acts, she always has an excuse for why she didn’t do something she should have done, then gets away with it! She always talks about how great other ponies are and never compliments herself, and it brings the both of you down with her and you’re never going to get your cutie marks with her bad, bossy, reckless attitude dragging you under the lake with her.”

Sweetie, while staying quiet and taking the verbal lashing, nodded in understanding, even though she wholeheartedly didn’t agree with anything Silver had said about her friends. “Okay,” Sweetie said flatly, “what about me?”

Silver poked the packed dirt with the tip of her forehoof. “Well, you’re the only one I don’t have a problem with, except you hang out with those other two losers. Like, I’ve always wanted to be your friend, but Diamond Tiara wouldn’t let me.”

Sweetie motioned with her head for them to get moving. “Why do you even hang out with Diamond Tiara? She’s the worst filly on earth,” Sweetie said carefully.

“She is,” Silver said to Sweetie’s surprise, “but she’s the only other pony in this town that ever got me. She’s the one who really has the problem with all of you, more than I ever have.”

Sweetie, having slowed, rushed to side with Silver Spoon. “Wait, why’s she upset with us? We didn’t do anything to her and she just started being mean to my friends and me. Even now, she’s trying to bully Snickers and fight him.”

Silver scoffed and rolled her eyes exaggeratedly. “Like you Cutie Mark Dumsaders don’t know what you did.”

Sweetie frowned and it came across as anger in her voice. “Stop calling us that, we’re at least trying to get our marks. We didn’t just get them like you and Diamond Tiara did.”

Silver Spoon turned on her hoof and faced Sweetie Belle, shouting and getting the attention of passing adults. “That’s exactly the point! You dumb fillies don’t know what you did and that’s just, like… horrible! You never even said you were sorry or did anything to make up for it.”

Sweetie was getting to her breaking point. “What did we ever do to get you mad at us? We’re always trying to be nice, and you’re always so mean you make me cry sometimes, or afraid to go to school! Why are you so awful?!” Sweetie screamed so loudly the market fell silent save for her panting breath as she looked at the surprised filly across from her.

Silver Spoon looked around and her eyes narrowed at the adults watching the scene. “Don’t you have shopping to do?” Silver snapped and slowly the market became busy again. “Fine, you wanna know what you did?” Sweetie, still fuming with so much anger her horn sent some sparks from the tip, waited. “You ruined Diamond Tiara’s Cutecinera.”

Sweetie calmed down. “How did we ruin her Cutecinera? She invited us, with you by her side, teasing us the whole time! We all hid under tables to get away from you that was the first time you made me cry.”

“Well, how is that my fault?” Silver retorted.

Sweetie reared and stomped her hooves on the ground. “How do you even think we messed up Diamond’s Cutecinera? We were avoiding you like you had the ponypox!”

“You stole the attention the minute you made your little club and speech, you took what was the most important day in a filly’s life from her and made it all about yourselves,” Silver said angrily and pushed her glasses up her muzzle. “Diamond and I spent three hours at the salon getting groomed and primped, then we went to the spa and got our hooves done with new shoes and gloss.

“We put on makeup with Diamon’s mother’s help, and Spoiled never helps with anything, and Diamond’s mother bought a custom dress, on rush, from Baltimare just for Diamond’s Cutecinera that she helped put on Diamond with her own hooves and mouth. I don’t even care about my dress, because she was beautiful and proud.

“Cutecinera’s aren’t free, and Diamond’s mother had to rent the party room and buy all the stuff you saw there. Every cake and pie was fresh that morning, a chocolate pony melts, how much do you think that spell cost?! Even the hay was purchased from Dodge Junction’s drying lots!

“It was her right to be the center of attention and to treat whoever she wanted however she wanted,” Silver said with a snort and started to choke up, “so what if she was mean, she still invited you muzzle to muzzle, not by card. Not by messenger or through somepony else, by her own voice!” Silver sniffled.

“Then Apple Bloom came in and made a scene, and Diamond had to get the attention back on her over and over again, then you made your little debut and stole the whole day! All she wanted was a celebration, and you three stole that from her. She was so sad, I’d never seen her so hurt.

“Her heart was smashed and she couldn’t even bear to show her face at the party, even after practically begging for attention before you were swarmed by the other fillies and colts. It was supposed to be a new start to her life and she started by inviting everypony in there with me by her side. And you took it from her, started your dumb club, and she hasn’t forgiven you, and neither have I, for being so rude and discourtious at somepony else’s party.”

Sweetie was staring at the ground and noticed the tears hit the dirt and be absorbed almost instantly. She didn’t have a thing to say, there wasn’t anything she could say, so she walked past Silver Spoon and silently they went on.

***

Snickers sighed and stopped looking at the mural, got to his hooves, and went to the window to look at the real scene. It was lovely, better than anything he ever though possible. Sure, nature and lush areas existed where he was from, but they were often guarded or restricted. The ones that were natural didn’t produce edible food and were practically barren of huntable life or digestible greenery.

Deserts of green or scrap yards and wastes, it was lose-lose and there wasn’t any point to live at the boundary because farms were protected more than colts were in Equestria.

Snickers watched the grass sway and felt his mouth water a little, knowing he could make it across the grasslands and find what was on the other side if he was back home and still equine… and armored, armed, with friends.

The memory of Harmony was almost a distant memory, but Snickers could feel it still. The meaning behind the vision was a part of him and he knew it. He couldn’t stop the message from becoming a part of him any more than being told red is red and blue is blue. He had to adapt, and thanks to Harmony, Snickers was becoming Equestrian.

The most confusing part to the colt watching nature from the window of a schoolhouse in a pony centric world, was that he wasn’t as bothered by his vision or the idea of Harmony anymore. Spiritualism existed everywhere in some form or another, anyone that travels would know that. Add on the fact he had friends, safety, a family, and a future, it was of little importance whether some magical force helped him understand familial bonds or if he spent ten times as long and had to eat a truckload worth of soap to learn it for himself.

A soft knock on the door brought his attention from self inflection bordering on an existential breakthrough to the white unicorn smiling at him. “Hello, Snickers. I heard you had a fainting spell and I’m here to take you home.”

Snickers left the window and silently went to Rarity, following her tail that was styled with waves and trimmed so it didn’t drag.

“Take a seat, Snickers,” Miss Cheerilee’s voice rang in his ears and he looked up, noticing he was in a private office usually used for meetings or tests, like the one he took two days prior. “Rarity, the reason I’ve asked you to visit with me is because of Snickers’s attitude today.”

“Oh, my,” Rarity sat taller and payed total attention to the teacher, “he hasn’t been roughhousing or fighting, has he?”

“No,” Miss Cheerilee shook her head, “he was fine until he fainted at recess. When he awoke, that was when the issue occurred. He swore louder than was appropriate by the most foul mouthed ponies in the known world, used a combination of words that I didn’t know went together, and every word was heard by his entire class.

“Miss Rarity, you understand what a forget-me-not enchanted gem is used for, right?”

“Well, clearly, I do. Contrary to the name, it is a gem used to erase several seconds… oh. Oh my, did you have to use it?”

Miss Cheerilee sighed and nodded. She pulled a piece of paper from the desk drawer and slid it over to Rarity. “The invoice is here. As you know, in this case you have to replace it. I’m sorry about this Rarity, but the school isn’t made of bits. Our budget is tight as it is and we can’t afford a replacement, or to help purchase a new gem.

“If I hadn’t used it, the foals would have new vocabulary and it would certainly discredit our school and we’d have to send the foals right into trade skills until we got our certification back. I’m sorry to have to say this, but Chancellor Neighsay isn’t very friendly to schools that he believes reflects poorly on pony society.”

“No, I do understand,” Rarity sighed as she looked at the invoice, then to Snickers as she slid it over for him to look at. Snickers’s eyes widened, then he slammed his eyes shut turning his muzzle to the floor out of shame. “So, should I send Snickers to school tomorrow with cookies or some other way to make amends?”

Miss Cheerilee shook her head sadly. “No, while Snickers has a lot of potential, I don’t see him coming back for at least two more days. The rules and policies state that I should expel him for his language and having to break such a valuable gem that I have to purchase directly from the EEA, but I’m going to tell them that it had come loose after one of the many events in recent history and I stepped on it by accident.

“I’ve spoken with the nurse and she understands completely, so she didn’t even know about it while she helped a foal in the next room. That leaves me with the room to let Snickers back in to class after a short suspension. Believe me, Rarity, this is the best I can do and I know Snickers isn’t happy with himself or everything that has happened over the past hour, but with luck this will be water under the bridge before too long.”

“Yes, I see. Thank you for your help, Cheerilee, and I’ll do my best to pay for this as soon as possible.”

Miss Cheerilee pressed her hooves to her temples and groaned. “Okay, one last thing. The date on the invoice is the due date for a new one to be ordered.”

Rarity’s mouth fell open and she looked at the invoice, then Snickers. “Well. It seems I have a lot of work to do, so we shall take our leave. It was a pleasure, as always, Cheerilee, and I hope to see you at the spa Thursday after school.”

Cheerilee nodded and smiled weakly. “I’m thankful you’re so understanding about this. My hooves are tied and your attitude really helps. I’ve got to get back into class to teach the last lesson of the day… which is actually the third,” she said dejectedly. “I’ll show you out.”

…

Snickers looked up at Rarity and noticed her posture was relaxed, she seemed fine in every way as they entered the town, but her face, from what he could see, wasn’t very expressive. For a mare that was constantly on an emotional rollercoaster, it told him she was restraining herself. Snickers cleared his throat and waited, Rarity didn’t respond, not even an ear twitch.

“Rar… mom?” Snickers asked meekly and finally saw her ear swivel toward him for a split second, indicating she was at least listening. “I… I’m sorry about the bill you have to pay. I’ll get a job and help how I can.”

“You’ve helped quite enough, young stallion.” Rarity replied calmly, yet it cut Snickers like the fine edge of tin foil.

“I’ll give you all the bits in my jar, too,” Snickers offered and he noticed Rarity’s gait shorten.

“I’ll be taking from that first, but thank you for the offer,” Rarity replied.

Seconds passed, the sound of hooves on dirt and ponies talking around them did little to distract him. “Um, what if I--”

“Silence!” Rarity looked back and scolded Snickers. “I’ll not hear another word until we’re home, after what you did,” she turned to face Snickers and loomed over him, casting her shadow over the colt; by happenstance the sun was just right in the day to do so. “You caused such a disruption in class that they lost part of the entire day.

“You used you vile language around other foals, you caused damage to school property that I have to reimburse, thanks to all this, I’m behind on my work and have to work even later tonight to not only catch up, but to get ahead to make the bits I have to repay directly to the royal coffers.

“I will hear nothing more from you, colt, until we’re home and behind closed doors… and until I’m not upset anymore,” Rarity stomped her forehoof in finalization, “do I make myself perfectly clear?”

Snickers looked around and saw dozens of ponies looking at them, at him, with disdain in their expressions. They’d heard Rarity’s comments and had seen her in rare form; angry. An emotion she almost never showed, always hiding it behind upper class snobbery. Snickers’s attention returned to Rarity when he heard her snort so hard she practically nickered in frustration.

Snickers nodded meekly. “Y-yes, mommy. I’m sorry.” Snickers mentally chastised himself for calling Rarity ‘mommy’ like a true child, but, while following further behind her and to the side, he realized he was a child. She was his guardian and, regardless of how he felt a week ago -give or take- he was starting to bond with her in a family role of parent and child.

The thought of Harmony messing with his mind was passed off, his mistakes for the past hour were all his own and Snickers wouldn’t deny it. He had messed up in every way Rarity said, and a couple she didn’t know about.

Snickers noticed Rarity holding the door to her boutique open for him and when he passed her, she followed and slammed the door behind her. Without a word, Rarity left Snickers to his own devices while she grabbed the red glasses from the face of a wooden model and brought them to her muzzle.

Rarity left to the back room and after standing still for almost a minute the sound of Rarity’s sewing machine started. With a heavy conscience, he climbed the stairs and went to his room. He looked around the room and sighed. Moving to the bookshelf he grabbed a book at random with his forehooves and jumped back when a flutter of paper rushed at him. He looked at the notebook he’d used his first couple days and sat down, turning to the first page that wasn’t torn to shreds.

He wondered what he could write about to make himself feel better, maybe to help the whole situation go away. Then the book he was initially grabbing tipped past it’s balance point and fell onto his head, landing open. Snicker yelped, brought a hoof to the spot and swore quietly at the book.

His eyes widened when he saw what page the book had opened on and what the implications were if he just started writing. But, as his mind raced he knew he needed more. He needed help, he needed… Pinkie Pie. Snickers mentally cringed, but physically got up and ran to his dresser and opened the top drawer and found the gift cards he’d gotten from Pinkie.

He flipped to a page and placed a hoof on the one offer a free diagram and ripped it off. He waited, expecting the pink pony to pop out of his dresser drawer for a while. He rolled his eyes and put the booklet back into the drawer and closed it, then moved back to the book to at least read it, maybe get inspiration.

“Let’s see,” Snickers said to himself, “mechanical properties and functions of the Turning Test Machine Mark 2. They have the basic idea of a computer, and they can read some data with their current technology. How can I make it better?” he asked himself and turned the page.

A huge grin crossed his muzzle so large it kind of hurt, but he was too enraptured by the pink envelope added to the book. He opened the envelope and read the words on pink paper.

Dear Snickers, even though you’re not my dear.
Hehehe. Scootaloo would be upset if that happened.
I had a feeling you’d need this, so I snuck it in after our party.
I hope you actually picked this book and not something else.
If you don’t get this letter.
Hi other pony that isn’t Snickers. If you’re from the future, I’m Pinkie Pie.
We’re friends now, just so you know. ^_^ I can make funny funny faces, see.
Only friends can do that for each other, that’s how I know we’re best friends.

But, that’s only if you’re not Snickers. Since you probably are Snickers it means the pony that got this letter gave it to you by now and I know they would have because a friend always helps.

This is that diagram I offered, I don’t know what it means though.
Gummy asked me to put a pencil on his tail and to make sure it stayed sharp.
I tell you that when that alligator dances its a real party!
Whoop whoop party on the escalator! Dance dance party party.
Go Gummy Go gummy!

I hope your tail’s swaying to the music in your head. Use the wubs to do what ya gotta to to make this squiggly line and that straight line do the thing! And don’t forget to smile!
That’s kinda my thing.

May the Force be ever in your favorite flavor of cupcake and may the resistance call Ohm upon you! Hehehehehe. *hugs and snugs*
XOXOXOXOXO
Best Friends!

There was a crude drawing of a pink pony with curly pink hair standing beside an equally sized chocolate brown pony with white mane facing her. Snickers couldn’t help but chuckle and set the letter aside and removed the diagram. Without reference he didn’t know what it went to, but he knew he could figure it out.

He blinked and noticed something. Turning the page at an angle, he saw the words ‘page 42 has the answers you seek’ written in fine lettering along a .

Snicker furrowed his brows. He knew the word, but even trying to think the word he had trouble understanding it. He hummed once in frustration before ignoring it and adding it to the questions he’d ask Twilight, if he could ever get alone with her without supervision because of Spike.

Setting the extra papers aside, Snickers turned to page 42 and noticed the pages between 42 and 56 were almost 30 numbered pages of double sided of diagrams that formed a complex that would work in a .

Snickers carefully slapped the side of his head. “C’mon, stupid brain. Make the words happen.” He grumbled. “I can make a power source. Great, I can say that but not… exactly. Whatever, I’ll figure it out later. I know how to make this work, and I’m sure there’s a way to make a monitor,” Snickers grinned. “Yes! Those exist here,” he hopped to his hooves and started doing a dance Twilight Sparkle would gladly join him in.

He stopped, giggled to himself, then went to work making the diagram work for him by calculating the potential voltage and cooling he’d need. The lizard knew his science, and when he next met Gummy, Snickers was going to give that alligator a pony back ride for the rest of the day.

Hours passed before the other CMC ran into his room. Snickers sat up and waved his forelegs at them, stopping them before they trampled over his work. Two dozen pages of math and pictures of what the end result would be lay scattered around Snickers and the fillies moved around the pages looking at them.

“What the hay is a ‘Turning Test Machine 6?” Apple Bloom asked.

Snickers chuckled happily. “Well, I’m six-ish, so it makes sense. Besides, why go in order when the future is now?”

The door to Rarity’s room opened and got their attention. The mare growled and slammed the door in frustration. Sweetie shrugged. “She’s just gonna yell at Mister Ed for about five minutes to feel better, then she’ll be happy again.”

Snickers covered his muzzle with his hoof to very poorly hide his grin and snickering.

“Why’re ya’ll so giggly? Ya thinkin’ somethin’ funny? Oh, did ya hear a joke?” Apple Bloom asked, stopped by a hoof on her withers and a shake of the head from Scootaloo.

“Hun… uh, like hunter, yes,” Scootaloo said nervously, “you were sent home from school and Miss Cheerilee said you were taking two days to recover, but Sweetie told us that you were,” she hesitated and scuffed the carpet, “suspended. Does that mean you’re a bad colt?”

Apple Bloom looked at Snickers, who had a smile still but had stopped laughing. “Ah dunno about bein’ in a herd with a jail bird. Ah heard once ya start bad in school, you’ll be in jail for breakin’ the law when ya grow up. Ah don’t want a jail cutie mark unless I’m workin’ in one… hmm,” she looked between Scootaloo and Apple Bloom who shared a firm nod.

“Later, Apple Bloom,” Scootaloo continued, “Snickers, are you really suspended?”

Snickers nodded.

“So,” Scootaloo asked, “now what? How can we help you be a better colt?”

Snickers snorted and waved Scootaloo and the others back a step. “Don’t step on my work, for one. Look, I’m working on a project that’ll help pay for the stuff I broke at school that mom has to pay for. Rarity… mom,” he furrowed his brow in frustration. “Fine, mom, I guess.”

“That’s nice ta hear, honest it is, that ya got a real mom.”

Snickers’s ears perked and he sat up, looking at Apple Bloom in surprise. “Wait, what about Applejack?”

“What’d’ya mean?” Apple Bloom asked curiously.

“I thought she was your mom,” Snickers said, getting a different reaction than he expected. The other two fillies took several steps back and Apple Bloom switched to anger.

“What in tarnation did ya just say?” Apple Bloom growled and lowered her head, pawing at the floor.

Snickers looked at his paperwork and then sat up, waving his forelegs defensively. “No, no! I didn’t mean anything offensive, honest! Don’t hurt me, I just thought she was you sister.”

The snort Apple Bloom made ruffled the pages two feet in front of her. “Ya got five seconds ta take that back!”

Snickers moved back and took a submissive posture, similar to what Silver Spoon had done earlier in the afternoon. “Woah, hold on, Apple Bloom!” Scootaloo said running between the two, walking on his notes. “Didn’t you hear him, he just said Applejack’s your sister. That’s okay, right?”

Apple Bloom used a foreleg to push her lighter friend aside like she was opening a door. “That ain’t what’s got me upset. He think mah sister is my sister.”

Snickers’s head spun in confusion. He sat up and looked at the fillies. “Wait, hold on, hold the fuck on, right now. Yeah, put two bits in the fucking jar, Sweetie, what the hell are you saying right now?” He asked in a way that stopped Apple Bloom from charging right then to at least whack his snoot for swearing.

“What the hay’re you talkin’ about? Ya better answer good or Ah’ll leave this herd and won’t talk to ya fer the rest of the week.”

Snickers shook his head and tapped his temple. “Wait, something’s wrong. Something… I…” he looked at Scootaloo and pointed at her. “What are the roles in a family from top down?”

Scootaloo pointed to herself and looked between her friends. “Uh, okay? First there’s the parents who are the father, and the mother, then the foals. If there’s more than one mare to the father, then they’re all mother’s to one another. Why’re you asking me that?”

Snickers’s ears fell and he looked between the fillies who had fallen silent. Even Apple Bloom, who was still mad, was curious about what was happening. Somewhat worried as well.

There was a muffled but deep moan from Rarity’s room that got all their attention. “Mister Ed, you bad stallion. That’s not supposed to… mmm, how could you?”

Sweetie rolled her eyes. “Five times some days, can you believe how mad she gets at that thing? She won’t even talk about why she yells at him so weirdly,” Sweetie said looking back at her friends, who shrugged. “I’ll close the door, she can get really loud sometimes.”

The door shut and the mood in the room became solely focused on the colt holding his head. “What… I… what’s happening to me?” he looked up and met the eyes of his herdmates and they all became worried for him. “I’m hearing too much, there are words in words in words, why are there so many?”

The fillies stood facing one another and started talking about what to do and who to ask, finally ending on Twilight Sparkle, since she knew the most words out of anypony in Equestria, in their opinion.

They helped Snickers from the room and even through his confusion the sounds coming from Rarity’s room as he passed were more than enough for him to know what she was doing, but he wondered what the smacking sound was until Sweetie clarified when they were leaving the shop.

“That mare is so weird!” Sweetie exclaimed.

“Why, because she yells at a fake stallion penis six times a day?” Scootaloo asked as two mares were passing and then stopped to follow the fillies’ gossip.

“No, well, yeah,” Sweetie said, “but because she spanks herself with a crop and sometimes in the middle of the night, if she’s working late, I’ve had to go pee and she’s wearing full tack with a ball in her mouth. At first I thought she was just modeling, but then I heard a stallion call her back to her room and ask her to nibble his edible boots.”

“Wait,” Scootaloo asked her friend, “if she’s yelling at a fake penis, then why’s it talking about her emergency edible boots? I thought she only made those for her Date Night Delights designs and we weren’t even supposed to know about them.”

Snickers was holding back his laughter through snorts and raspberries as the fillies talked over him.

“How am I supposed to know?!” Sweetie shouted. “She’s the one with a talking penis that wears boots.”

Snickers burst into laughter falling to his side while the fillies watched. The mares following them kept walking, faster and whispering animatedly to one another between giggles and swishing tails. “What’s gotten into ya now? More weird words rollin’ around in yer noggin?” Apple Bloom asked exasperatedly.

Sweetie looked at Apple Bloom. “Maybe Applejack would know about talking boot wearing penisus since our stallion can’t even keep on the subject without falling over.”

“At least he didn’t pass out this time,” Scootaloo said. “But he’s got the giggles bad, he’s crying over here. Maybe it’s something you said, Sweetie Belle.”

Sweetie looked at her friend, all three fillies were standing over him now. “What? I haven’t said anything funny for a while, it’s been a stressful day. Maybe I should yell at a penis to feel better.”

Snickers started kicking his forelegs. “S-stop… please, too much…”

“That’s it,” Sweetie stomped her forehoof and leaned down. “You’re dumb and look funny and smell weird and my mother makes weird noises a lot!”

Scootaloo joined in and leaned over Snickers to shout at his… lower belly. “And school was boring today! I wanted to see Rainbow Dash, but I couldn’t.”

Apple Bloom looked at her friends and shook her head. “Ah don’t get it, Ah don’t feel… wait a minute,” she said with her voice deepening. The colt was howling with laughter and extended his hind legs, looking down at the fillies scowling at his parts. Apple Bloom leaned over. “Mah dumb herd stallion was a jerk earlier! He made me mad and that wasn’t nice of him!”

The fillies stood up and smiled to one another. “Hey, I do feel kinda better,” Sweetie said.

“Me, too. We should yell at Snickers’s penis more often. My auntie said that before she loved my other auntie by marriage, that a penis would always make her feel better. Maybe this is what she meant.”

Snickers had reached the pointed where he couldn’t laugh, only wheeze like a person gasping for air at high altitudes. “St-stop, can’t breathe,” he wheezed, still grinning with tears running from his eyes.

The fillies gasped. Scootaloo ran sat and picked up his head and looked at him. Apple Bloom lay her head onto his chest and listened. Sweetie pranced in place. “Oh no, what happened? Is he okay? He’s okay, right? Everypony, stay calm… we trained for this. We trained for this!”

Adults finally started laughing at the group and cast bits at them, thinking it was a street play while Snickers lay possibly literally dying of laughter in Scootaloo’s embrace.

Apple Bloom sat up and wiped her forelocks from her face with a sigh. “He’s okay, girls. Just a mild cardiac arrhythmia, nothing to worry about. Just get’m walkin’ and it’ll fix’m right up like apple juice on a hot day.”

Sweetie stopped panicking and sighed. “Whew, that’s good to hear. Okay, let’s help him up then.”

“Uh, girls?” Scootaloo said with a worried look to them. “He really did pass out again.”

Apple Bloom and Sweetie face hooved.

Health Issues

Rainbow Dash landed beside Sweetie Belle with a gust of wind that buffered the fillies into covering their eyes while Scootaloo covered Snickers with her upper body. “Hey, give him to me,” Rainbow said landing and quickly moved past Scootaloo who held onto Snickers tightly.

Scootaloo scowled at the mare. “No, he’s mine, you can’t have him, Rainbow Dash!”

“Fluttershy, little help?” Rainbow called up to the buttery yellow mare slowly descending.

“I’m sorry, Rainbow Dash, I’m just not as fast as you are. Um, girls, there’s something wrong with Snickers and we have to take him to the hospital, okay?” Fluttershy said quietly enough to be heard by those nearest to her.

Scootaloo shook her head. “No, I won’t. Only if you take me, too.”

“We don’t have time for this,” Rainbow grunted. “You take him, I’ll take her,” she said and firmly nosed Scootlaoo up and onto her back. “Hold on, Scoots. You girls are okay, right?” Rainbow asked the two remaining fillies.

“Yeah,” Sweetie Belle said fluffing her mane to get some dust out of it, “but what’s wrong? What’s going on?”

Fluttershy looked at Apple Bloom and smiled. “You really did train for this. We’ll explain more later, we have to get to the hospital, meet us there, okay?”

“Fluttershy, if you don’t move it; I’ll drag you by your mane!” Rainbow shouted from high above.

Fluttershy flapped her wings and ascended at a steady pace until she neared Rainbow. Words were heatedly said to the Fluttershy, who then flew off at a sprint with Rainbow following, both leaving trails behind them.

“What in tarnation was that about?” Apple Bloom asked and shared a worried look with Sweetie Belle.

Sweetie looked back to her sister’s home and then down the street. “I don’t know, but I think we should tell Rarity and Twilight. They might know what’s going on, and Rarity should be there regardless because he’s family. Wanna split up?”

“Sure, but Ah’m gonna have ta tell mah sister. Ah don’t want her gettin’ all worried over me bein’ out without her knowin’.”

Apple Bloom and Sweetie split up and went to their self issued tasks while Rainbow and Fluttershy landed at the hospital. “Hey, Nurse, we need help!”

A stallion ran around the counter and took Snickers in his magic while two mares brought a gurney to lay him on. “What’s wrong with him?”

“He’s got an arrhythmic heartbeat that led to him fainting. That’s twice this afternoon, something’s wrong with him,” Rainbow said, “he needs a cardiologist on call and angiogram, stat.”

The room went silent for a split second as Rainbow finished talking. A doctor came around the corner. “Bring the colt into room four, we have to make sure he’s alright. Thank you for bringing him in, the nurses will take any information you have to give.”

Snickers was rushed into a hospital room leaving Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash watching him go. Fluttershy nuzzled Rainbow Dash. “Rainbow, why don’t you show how smart you are more often?” She asked. “As a friend, I have to ask why you don’t. As your best friend, I really want ponies to see you in a better light.”

Rainbow shook her head. “Because smart ponies don’t fulfill their dreams. I want to be a great flier, and great fliers don’t have eggheads.” Fluttershy sighed quietly. “Besides, when are you gonna show that smile more often? You could finally get a date,” Rainbow winked at her friend.

Fluttershy blushed and hid behind her mane. “N-no. I like the idea, but there’s too much happening for me to do such things right now.”

“Excuse me, ladies?” Nurse Tenderheart asked as she approached. “I need to know everything that led up to his loss of consciousness.”

“Yeah, we can do that. Right, Fluttershy?”

***

Snickers awoke in a hospital bed with a jolt, checking himself for straps holding him down or any injuries he may have had that brought him to where he was. “Hey, sleepy head,” Scootaloo said from beside him. She was lying on the bed and holding him gently.

“This isn’t another fantasy, is it? I swear if you’re some avatar of Harmony…” Snickers trailed off when he saw the look in Scootaloo’s eyes.

“You’re here and okay, I think. You were with me and the girls and then laughed until you fainted, then Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy took you here,” Scootaloo looked at Snickers and smiled, leaning up to kiss him. “You’ve been asleep for a couple hours, hun. I was so worried you were gonna be stuck here and I couldn’t see you.”

Snickers lay his head back and groaned. “What happened this time? I remember you being funny and that was it, weren’t you shouting at my… personal area?”

Scootaloo snickered. “Yeah, it was fun. My aunts were right, that it made me feel better.”

Snickers looked down at the filly resting her head on him and gave her a shove. “You need to stop that, okay?”

“What?” Scootaloo looked hurt, “I was just gonna lay on you to hear your heartbeat… if you don’t want me to--”

“No, it’s not that,” Snickers said and lay his head back. “Stop talking about body parts and everything about making foals, everything related to that. It’s just… it’s really freaking me out.”

Scootaloo sat up and shimmied up to nuzzle under his chin. “I’m sorry, I really didn’t know. I figured you were okay with normal filly talk now.”

“Scootaloo, do you remember six days ago?” Snickers asked.

“Kinda, why?”

“What was my take on clothes?” he asked.

Scootaloo remembered fully and looked away. “I… guess I thought you were fine being like every other colt now, and sex is something we talk about sometimes, ya know?”

Snickers shook his head. “No, you’re talking about it too much. I was kind of okay with it when it was silly and just happened, but over the past couple days it seems like that’s all you and the others talk about. Are you going into your time, or something? Is that what’s going on?”

Scootaloo shook her head and looked at the door that was open a little before she turned back to Snickers. “No… kind of. Snickers,” Scootaloo said and climbed on top of him, “I want you to be my first. Claim me as your first mare of our herd, I promise I’ll make you happy and always be with you.”

Snickers’s eyes widened and he shook his head. “No,” he said sternly, “get off of me.”

“But, you’re my stallion and that’s what you’re supposed to do!” Scootaloo said and pressed her forehooves into his chest. “I feel a part of you agrees with me,” she looked between them and then met his eyes, frowning when he didn’t show the readiness she believed he should have. “C’mon, let’s get these sheets out of the way and you can make me your mare.” Scootaloo moved her forehooves and started to pull the sheets down.

Snickers grabbed her foreleg and shoved her with all his might, sending her off him and the bed onto the floor. “No, Scootaloo. That’s not how this works, it’s not how any of this is supposed to work! You don’t just tell me what to do any more than I can tell you what to do, and I don’t want you that way.”

Scootaloo hopped to her hooves and stood up with her forehooves on the bed and asked, pleadingly. “Then tell me, what do I have to do to keep you with me? I love you, and you have to love me because of last night. I’m ready, I can see you are, too,” Snickers looked at the sheets and grabbed a pillow from behind his head to cover himself with.

“That’s not what it means, Scootaloo,” Snickers said to the frustrated filly, “you don’t understand the love means more than sex. Love isn’t just mating.”

“Yes, it is! It says so in the book, it says so at the doctor’s office, every mare says that stallions are always ready and you’re ready,” she pointed to the pillow, “and that means you want me, and I’m ready, my tail is swishing, so it means I’m ready for you. So take me, I’m ready! We don’t have to be alone with each other, I felt you between us. I felt you and you waited, now I’m saying--”

“That’s enough!” Snickers shouted at Scootaloo. “I’m not a fucking stallion, damn it. I’m a colt,” Snickers’s voice cracked, “and you’re a just a filly. I’m not even going to have sex if I can help it, ever, with a pony. You’re not ready, Scootaloo, you’re just lonely for some reason. I’m sorry about whatever happened to you to make you think sex will make me stay with you forever, but that’s not how this works!”

Snickers’s head swam and he groaned, lying back as Scootaloo screamed in anguish. Rainbow Dash flew into the room and wrapped Scootaloo into a hug while nurses and a doctor followed on hoof. “What happened, is everything alright with Snickers?” Nurse Beating Heart asked over the crying filly’s noise.

Rainbow Dash flapped her wings to give the medical team distance to work around Snickers. “I don’t know, nurse. She started screaming and he looks drugged, is this related to his--”

“Maybe, right now we have to check him over,” The doctor looked at the crying filly and gestured to the door. “Can you take the filly to the waiting room, please? She’s too loud and doesn’t need to be here to see this.”

“Sure thing, doc,” Rainbow Dash said with a salute.

Rainbow lay Scootaloo on a bench seat and looked down at her. “Hey, Squirt, what’s goin’ on?”

Scootaloo moved quickly and wrapped her forelegs around Rainbow’s neck. “He’s gonna leave me. I love him more than any pony ever... and he’s gonna leave me… and I’ll never love anypony ever again.”

Rainbow repressed the ten second long groan she felt building inside her chest and instead held Scootaloo. “It’ll be okay, I don’t think he’s going anywhere, and you’ve got a lot of years to find a pony that’ll love you.”

Scootaloo buried her snout in Rainbow’s chest. “No, you don’t get it. I offered myself to him and he said no. I’m ugly and not worth a stallion as amazing as he is.”

Rainbow glowered down at the filly’s back, then pushed Scootaloo back to look at her. “Open you eyes, Scoots,” Rainbow said calmly. Respecting her idol, Scootaloo did and saw a look of shame in Rainbow’s eyes. “I don’t want to ever hear you say anything like that again, do you hear me?”

“B-b-but, it’s t-t-true, no stallion--”

“No! First, don’t talk about stallions that way because you’re too young for a full grown stallion,” Rainbow stated, “second, you’re a beautiful filly that will grow up into a wonderful mare, especially if you hang out with me; it’s a guarantee, right?”

Scootaloo blubbered still, yet nodded.

“And just because you offer yourself to a colt, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t like you for saying no. Snickers is a lot of things, you should respect him for saying no. Most colts would fold under the pressure and do what you told them. Yeah, he’s kinda cool like that, but… I’ll be honest, Scootaloo,” Rainbow looked around and saw Twilight, Rarity, and Fluttershy looking at their little conversation with interest. Rainbow’s cheeks warmed, but she had something to do that was more important than herself.

“Scootaloo, is Snickers really the best and most amazing pony you can be with?” Rainbow asked implying the romantic aspect and not the selfish persona Rainbow wears like a cloak. Scootloo snuffled and looked at her forehooves that tapped against one another. “What did I teach you a while ago?” Rainbow asked.

“Th-that all I need to be happy,” Scootaloo sniffled wetly, “is to be happy with me. But, Snickers is the one I need!” Scootaloo retorted, but her strength waned and her posture sagged as she thought about what she’d done and how close she’d come to breaking not only trust between her friends, but her own vows to herself. “I… I kinda messed up, Rainbow.”

Scootaloo averted her eyes and whimpered. “What did I miss, Scootaloo?” Rainbow asked.

Scootlaoo looked at her hooves and sniffled loudly. “I… didn’t just ask him to take me, Rainbow Dash.”

Rainbow’s mind ran through a half dozen possibilities. “You didn’t flash him did you? Oh no, you didn’t do anything like touching yourself, did you?”

Scootaloo shook her head meekly. “I… wanted to give myself to him and since he’s in bed... I kinda got on top of him and said I’d do the work… and rubbed myself on him like I heard works to get a stallion to poke out,” Scootaloo blushed and whined. “I’m a terrible filly for doing that, aren’t I?”

Rainbow lowered her head until her forehead was touching Scootaloo’s. “No, squirt, you just let your body do the thinking for you instead of your head. I guess Snickers is kinda awesome for saying no, so many things would be worse if he had just gone along with it.”

Rainbow heard Rarity and Fluttershy talking, the tone came across as something positive and Rainbow knew she’d find out about it later. “C’mon, Scoots, I’ll take you back to your home. You shouldn’t stay here and you can talk with your aunts about a lot of these things that I’m not very good with.”

Scootaloo giggled and pressed her forehead slightly harder against Rainbow’s. “Yeah, like bein’ all sappy.”

Rainbow leaned back. “Exactly, I’m way too awesome to be sappy, especially over some pony that doesn’t--”

“Howdy, ya’ll. Ah just got the word, is Snickers alright?” Applejack called to her friends.

Rainbow stopped speaking with a squeak. Her eyes widened, her wings twitched slowly open, and she stiffened her forelegs. Scootaloo, as well as everypony else, knew how Rainbow felt about Applejack and the chance was too perfect for the filly to pass up.

“So,” Scootaloo said with a smug look, “you were just sayin’ how much you liked Applejack’s mane,” she said curiously, “why’d you stop? I like how you were saying her mane is like wheat blowing in the summer breeze and mpghn!”

“That’s enough soda for you, Scoots. Oh, hey, AJ,” Rainbow said hovering and holding the squirming filly under her foreleg while the other leg wrapped around Scootaloo’s mouth. “I didn’t see ya come in. Uh, I’ve got some wheat, er, hay to breeze… I’ve gotta go!”

Rainbow flew out of the waiting room with Scootaloo and a second later the rest of Rainbow’s close friends laughed together.

“What’s so funny? Where’s Rainbow Dash takin’ Scootaloo? Ah thought she was gonna wait fer me’n Sweetie.” Apple Bloom looked at the laughing mares and shook her head. “Grown ups.”

***

Even through fur, the doctors stethoscope was cold and was unpleasant as ever. “Well, young stallion, you seem to be okay for now. I have news, but your parent should be here so I don’t have to tell you both at different times. Nurse,” the doctor asked a mare, “can you get his parents?”

“Oh, just a mother, Doctor. I’ll see if she’s in the waiting room right away.”

“See, just a moment and we’ll be able to figure out where to go from here,” the doctor said patting Snickers’s hind leg comfortingly.

“Whatever, am I gonna die or something?” Snickers asked with a bit of snark.

“I can honestly say no, but I can’t say anything else until she arrives. So, your mother takes care of you, then?”

Snickers shrugged. “She does what she can. I’m an asshole, so that makes it tough on her.”

“Excuse me, but does your mother tell you that? Because if she’s the one saying something like that to you, it’s not okay.”

“Ha,” Snickers grinned. “Nope, I eat a tablespoon of snark and wash it down with a glass of I know better. It really helps keep me alert and ready to say something that’ll get a bit or two in my jar just by reacting.”

The doctor laughed. “Well, I’ve never heard of it put that way.”

“Excuse me? Oh, Snickers! I’ve been so worried,” Rarity rushed to him and nuzzled him. “You have to stay calmer, at this rate you’ll give yourself a heart attack before you’re twenty.”

“Ah, hello. I’m the pediatrician, Doctor Horse. Charlie Horse, but you can call me Doctor Horse.”

Snickers snerked and looked at the doctor. “Seriously? I hope you won’t be a pain in my flank.”

“Ah, the classic jokes at my name,” Doctor Horse sighed longingly, “I wish I was a whiny little five year old, then I could tease you back,” he said smiling and poked Snickers in the side, eliciting a giggle from the colt.

“Doctor, while that’s all well and good; I wonder if I might take my son home to rest after such an exciting day.” Rarity asked in the most polite way she could.

“Well, first I have to give you the prognosis. Snickers is okay, but he seems to have a heart murmur that led to his fainting spells. He can go home in a couple hours, to monitor his healing. I’ve already treated the murmur as best we’re able and by tonight, Snickers should be back to full health without any fainting spells.”

“Oh, that’s so nice to hear. Snickers,” Rarity said giving Snickers a one legged hug, “I'll gather your… oh, you didn’t have anything, did you?”

Snickers placed his forehoof on Rarity’s foreleg. “Mom, I need some clothes.”

Rarity beamed. “Why, Snickers, I’d be delighted. Once the fame dies down some over the past day’s events I don’t see why I can’t make you something by… Wednesday, at the soonest.”

Snickers gave Rarity the best puppy dog eyes he could and got the best reaction. "Oh, fine," Rarity caved when his bottom lip trembled, "I'll refit your shirt when we get home."

"Awe, I was hoping for something full body that breathes like Neighgytion cotton and weights as much as ten feathers while gathering enough attention to be eye pleasing while not attracting the room. Oh well," Snickers shrugged nonchalantly while Rarity looked at him with her jaw slack, "I guess anything anypony else has works, too."

"I think not! No child of mine, by birth or adoption, shall wear anything but the best there is. I know what you're doing," Rarity smirked at Snickers, "and I accept your challenge.

"However, it will have to be between my orders. You have a lot of chores to do in order to make up for what I'll have to pay."

"Yes, that's all nice to hear. I'll go and have a nurse check on you shortly. Did you have anything else for me?"

"No, thank you, Doctor Horse." The doctor nodded to Rarity and left. "So, what led to this fainting spell?"

"Mom, remember what I said this morning about Scootaloo? Well, it turns out I don't… but she really does to me. She tried to do some stuff that I'm not cool with, but I think she's got issues that I can't handle."

"I understand, darling. When I was in the waiting area, we overheard Scootaloo telling Rainbow Dash and she's apologetic, at least." Rarity rested her foreleg on Snickers's chest.

"Well...okay, I guess. But, when I, wait. Um… about me passing out," he tapped his forehooves together and smiled awkwardly. "I started laughing because the girls," he blinked, "we're taking about your dildo wearing shoes and I lost it."

Rarity blushed bashfully. "You needed speak of hm in such a manner. Mster Ed is enough."

Snicker felt himself sneer. "Anyway, I started having trouble breathing and fell over. I tried asking for help, but they thought I was laughing. Then I woke up here."

Rarity cooed at her son. "Awe, don't worry. mother is here to make sure you're going to get all better."

Snickers growled. "I need to see Twilight, somethings wrong and I'm hearing… things."

"Oh? Like what?" Rarity asked puzzled.

Snickers sighed in defeat. "Just, can you please get her?"

Reluctantly, Rarity nodded. "Certainly, she's in the waiting room with the others. I'll return shortly."

Three minutes later, Rarity returned with several others in tow. Snickers grinned when he saw Fluttershy and when she went straight to him for a hug, Snickers gladly returned it.

"Oh, you poor colt. Two faintings in the same afternoon? That's so unfortunate, did you need anything from me?" Fluttershy asked while sharing her deep blue eyes with Snickers.

"Hold on, now. We've got time fer that stuff later. What's this about Snickers needin'ta see Twilight for so bad?" Applejack asked.

"Yes, we don't know one another very well," Twilight started, "but if there's anything you need, and I'm able, I'm willing to help."

"I'm hearing words," Snickers said to a blank expression. "I mean… when certain words are being said,I hear them in two or three ways. It's just, really confusing and hard to understand. When I came here, I was told magic’s the answer.

"So, can you magic me better?"

Twilight looked at Snickers. "Well, just to humor you, with your permission, I'd like to scan your mind with my magic to see if there's anything wrong before I offer help I may not be able to provide."

"Sure, just don't mess with anything in there that makes me, me." Snickers said.

Twilight shook her head as her horn lit. "That's unethical and illegal. I won't do anything without letting you know first."

Twilight's horn glowed and shortly after so did Snickers's head. Twilight gasped and her magic stopped with an audible snapping sound.

Rarity yelped and flinched with all the others. "Darling?! What happened? Your magic hasn't ever done that before."

Snickers rubbed his head and looked at the mares. "What happened?" He asked and the room fell silent. "What?"

Rarity placed a hoof to her chest, glaring at Twilight. ""

Snickers looked at Rarity and his ears twitched at the combination of words and horse noises she made. Twilight responded in kind. “"

Whatever Twilight said seemed in incense Rarity and Rarity shoved Twilight with her magic against the wall with enough force to indent the purple mares body shape into it. Snickers was glad it was cheap drywall and not anything made for durability.

Applejack intervened in the shouting, stopping Rarity from charging Twilight. “” she asked. Snickers watched and noticed Fluttershy standing between himself and the others, her wings low and her crouched the same. He could tell she wan’t placid, she was defensive of him and emboldened him.

“Mom! Stop!” Snickers shouted and got the attention of the room. “It’ll be okay, whatever happened, whatever happens, we can work this out.”

“” Rarity whined and turned back to Twilight. “”

Snickers gulped at the conflict. “Great, now what are we supposed to do about all this mess?” He asked not expecting or getting a reply.

I have to get out of here. I can't... Snickers thought and climbed from his bed before dashing from the room ignoring the others.

Author's Note

So, book 1 is done.

The next story will be focused on Harmony.

Harmony isn't what it seems, Snickers will start a change that might be pretty big, and there will be more mature situations that'll give the next story an M rating just because violence and sexual situations. Tags and triggers will be appropriate.

Thanks for reading and the next story is gonna be much better, I think, than even this one.

Also, no unknown dream sequences or shouting at penisus... well, the first one for sure.

Please, don't freak out. A lot of things are gonna entertain you going forward.
👌🏽

Arrival

I can’t believe I’ve fallen so far behind on my tasks, I was on time with the hem on the dress for Packet and after that, which should be now, I’d be starting the inseam on the birthday dress for that awful mare I met in Manehattan that said she was famous and showed me a fake photo of herself with Princess Celestia.

I had to take the order, against my better judgement, on the spot instead of via correspondence or over a long winded conversation full of gossip and rumor mongering. Dazzling Pearl, indeed.

Rarity caught herself frowning at the clock and nervously swatted at her mane in a practiced way that made her seem to be more superficial than she actually was. The room was a smaller square that was at the top of the second flight of stairs with a door at the end, one that she knew led to a hallway that spanned the diameter of the building. Two rooms were offset by four doors, two on each side, with a final door one would see with the mayor’s cutie mark on it.

The door was two paces from the secretary’s desk, which was three paces from the very well used and aged, but thankfully covered with a clean cloth, cushion she sat upon. The secretary sat at his desk outside the hall to the mayor’s office writing on a notepad with a pencil held in his lips with dexterity Rarity, on occasion, envied.

Her eyes watched the motions of the graphite wrapped in wood, trying to discern what was being written with such intensity with no other documents of importance around him. The pencil stopped and her eyes met his for an instant before she took a great deal of interest at a knot of wood under the surface of the desk, under where he could see.

“Have you ever noticed there’s a mark on the desk that looks like the flame of a candle in a soft breeze?”

The stallion stood up, walked to the side of the desk and looked at the mark, shrugged, and went back to sitting on the floor, curling his tail out of her sight. “No, Miss Rarity. I didn’t see what you saw, heh. See-saw.” He started scratching at the paper again, leaving a sentence hanging in her mind.

Before it took over all her mental faculties she cleared her throat. “Yes, well, excuse me. But, have you any idea when the mayor will be available to see me, since she called upon me with such urgency, I would think she’d be ready at the onset of my arrival.”

He looked up and the pencil stopped. He shrugged, then started writing again.

What is wrong with this stallion? I certainly hope that if he is a special hire that he has somepony to assist him assisting me. Perhaps she’s simply in the restroom, for ten minutes, at ten in the morning. Hm, maybe there’s something with the number ten today. A coincidence of some sort, it isn’t the tenth. It’s not the tenth month, thank Celesia. Maybe it’s just a busy day today?

In Ponyville, early in the day, in the middle of the Month of Songs, Rarity exhaled quietly, since a Lady doesn’t sigh loudly in public. Come on, come on, come on… come on!

The door clicked and opened inward, the mayor was smiling with her professional demeanor and brightened when she saw Rarity. “Ah, just the mare I was hoping to see. Rarity how have you been?”

They met just past the stallion and Rarity took the chance to glance at the paper and what was written on it when she gave a greeting nuzzle to the mayor. Well, color me impressed. He’s a writer and his penmareship is quite good, for a stallion.

“Oh, it was nothing to wait for a meeting with you. I’d drop everything just to see you for some one on one time, it’s been so very long, and I often wonder what Miss Ivory Scroll has been up to when not fetlock deep in paperwork and running a growing town.”

“It’s been busy, that’s for certain. Thankfully, we don’t have any recent monster attacks to report to the capitol, but our harvest projections are a bit low,” Ivory sighed loudly and Rarity’s smile grew slightly. “It’s a lot to talk about, but that’s not why you’re here. Come with me into my office, this is an official request, after all.”

Rarity followed Ivory Scroll, taking the personal energy and focus to close the doors behind her so she could let the writer write. “I’ll be honest, Mayor, I was and am a bit surprised to receive your summons on such short notice. This isn’t about my business, is it? If it is, I’d like to work with you to clarify anything that may seem amiss.”

“It’s nothing of the sort, Rarity,” Ivory led Rarity down the hall and towards the open door to her office where she saw the large mayorial desk that was as long as a buffet table with sets of boxes labeled in and out at both sides. An actual chair that hadn’t seen a year of use yet was where the mayor was to take her seat while two small benches indicated where she’d have to sit, if she chose to sit at all.

However, a Lady doesn’t stand during important personal meetings, so as she closed the door behind herself she was choosing her seat based on several factors she felt mattered she was surprised when the door was tugged back open. She looked back at what had disrupted her magical grip.

A candy apple red colt, just old enough to be out of his initial training in his talent, stumbled into the room with a disarray of papers under his wing. “Hi, sorry about that. I’m Seven, I come from a large family and I work for EMF, it’s nice to meet you, Miss Rarity.”

Alarm bells rang in her mind as she habitually met the colt’s hoof about what the issue could be. She wasn’t neglectful of Sweetie Belle, she wouldn’t comment on any other foals without a neutral Ministry representative present, she wouldn’t comment on her parents’ lack of attention to their parental responsibilities. In the second it took her to worry she had begun the rote greetings and came back to reality when she was offered to take a seat after the colt rudely took the seat she was considering slightly more than the one she was left with.

“Good, now that everypony is here, we can begin. As Seven mentioned, he represents the Equestria Ministry of Families, Foals, and Mental Health, and he’s here to discuss with you the fostering program you signed up for last year after there were a series of arsons attacking orphanages and specific sock factories.”

“They are still reported as being unrelated, as far as inspectors can tell, but it is a little suspicious.”

Ivory narrowed her eyes slightly at the colt that was the same as a mother telling their child to stop being disrespectful and to let the adults talk. “Yes, rumors and allegations of outland foal labor aside, we have something concrete to discuss.” Her demeanor relaxed and she gestured to Seven.

“Y-yes, well, as Miss Mayor Ivory Scroll said, you’re here because we have a foal for you to foster.” Rarity resisted the desire to wave her forelegs at the colt and deny everything, but she recalled signing the documents with the intent of following through, but that was then.

“Yes, I recall quite well. Orphans were at risk, now they are not, unless there’s another rash of dangers across the nation I should be concerned about.”

“No, nothing of the sort, Miss Rarity.”

“Please, just call me Rarity,” she interjected and Seven nodded, taking papers from under his wing and lying them on the desk in a haphazard pile he grimaced at. “And what might these be?”

“Yeah, uhm, you signed the documents, but like many ponies that acted in a time of crisis, I don’t think you thought about the far reaching nature of these documents.” He said as she quickly sorted the papers into piles that were thankfully much more orderly.

“And what are you saying, Seven?” she asked with implied criticism at the colt.

“The documents are standing for five years under any and all reasons that protect a foal, child, or offspring of any sapient creature that resides within the lands of Equestria at the time of signing; unless you are found guilty of a crime against the nation at large, fall into poverty and are unable to take care of the foster, or your life permanently ends in all forms recognizable by the Equestria Ministry of Families, Foals, and Mental Health, after its council decrees as such in your individual case.”

Rarity and Ivory looked at him with impressment. “That was certainly quite the mouthful,” Rarity complimented him.

“I practice a lot,” he answered and took his seat. “So, you’re going to foster a colt with special circumstances that we will help you work with until you decide or are deemed unable to supervise his mental and physical growth and wellbeing.”

“Wait, I apologize, but did you say I am to foster a colt? As in,” she hesitated to gesture at the male’s frame.

“Yes, I won’t patronize you so please understand that not only females fall into the dangers or risks of the hardships of life. I have a little more information on the colt, but here’s the paperwork I have gone over with Miss Mayor Ivory Scroll and we can go over it together if you’d like.

Rarity looked at the folder in her magic, reluctantly accepting her responsibility. She looked it over and over the next hour went over the document, what was known about the colt, and assistance that could be offered within five minutes at the crack of a special gem used by Rarity.

At the end, she was holding the folder to her chest with her forelegs while the colt stood awkwardly by the closed door and Ivory Scroll held a quietly crying Rarity in a gentle hug.

A Scolded Rarity

“Rarity, I don’t want to sound mean… but how you handled Snickers earlier was certainly uncalled for.”

Rarity sighed while walking to the stove. “Would you like some tea, darling?”

“Oh, no thank you. I only have a moment before I must go. But, a foal with his problems shouldn’t have to be subjected to what you’ve done to him already.”

“Is this because of that male stereotype from forever ago?”

Fluttershy scuffed a hoof on the linoleum. “No, it’s not only because he’s a colt. Any child shouldn’t have their mouths soaped to the extent you went to.”

“But Fluttershy, he was being positively crude and just… just dreadful! His choice of language is set to profane, and--”

“Rarity!” Fluttershy’s voice silenced Rarity. “I… don’t… care! You’re… I’m sorry, Rarity, but you’re just a bully to him! Ever since you met him you’ve been just a very… not nice pony, haven’t you?”

“W… you see, I believe I’ve been quite cordial with him, if I must say so,” she flipped her mane and looked at Fluttershy, meeting her eyes and wilting under her intense gaze.

“Tell me if this is true, Rarity,” Fluttershy asked sternly, “you left him alone for hours when he first got here to work?”

“Yes, but I was behind on my--”

“You soaped him until he vomited?” Fluttershy asked with a sterner voice.

“Only because he said I was preparing to--”

“How did you introduce him to me?”

“He was going to mount my sister like a--”

“Be quiet! Rarity...” Fluttershy said in a deeper voice than she’d ever used around ponies, “you’re the biggest meanie that poor little colt has met since he got to this land from wherever he’s from, he told me when he was crying like I’ve never seen a pony his age cry. I have to put this in my report and… I just… can’t see you right now, Rarity. I’m sorry!”

She turned and ran away from the stunned white mare fast enough to leave her hair flowing behind her. She opened the door and leapt into the air, flying away just in time to see the CMC and Snickers looking at a map. For a moment she forgot about all the pain he was holding in and hiding and only saw three friends starting a new adventure.

…

Rarity stood in the kitchen, tall and still for several seconds before she stomped a hoof on the floor. “Why that traitorous little… ugh! She has no idea what it’s like to manage a large number of clients, take care of their needs, and supply them at their demand while giving yourself completely to their needs! Why can’t she understand that taking care of my little sister is a full time job itself?

“With having to find her and her friends things to do, clean her from her unsupervised galavanting, giving her group bits so they can…” she trailed off as things fell into place in her mind. Fluttershy’s honesty finally filtered through her pride, washing away her charm and charisma to the point that if she were Pinkie her mane and tail would have fallen flat.

“If a customer came in right now… I don’t even know,” she called a fainting couch to herself and lay on it. Next a bucket of ice cream left the freezer with a spoon from a nearby drawer joined her and she began eating loudly, nomming with each heaping spoonful.

“…Ngyum, ngumm, omnong… oh, what shall I do?” she lay back and draped her foreleg across her forehead. “Motherhood, the one thing I haven’t prepared for in all my years of dress making. Whom shall I seek to find mentoring in this new venture I find myself in? Ngummm, nom, nom.”

She pondered between bites of ice cream for several minutes, thinking of who to talk with, nomming loudly and posing dramatically when she got ice cream headaches.

“Ha! Idea, the Cakes have foals. They have to know everything there is to know about rearing them, not to mention Pinkie Pie. No, wait. Sweetie and her friends are going there and I don’t know when. Who else? Hmm… Well, the pickings are indeed slim, but Granny Smith has more than enough experience.

“I’ll ask her once I’m done wallowing in shame for all the wrongs I’ve done today thus far. No more, ngyum-nom… shall I be a poor mother figure. From this moment on, I, Rarity, will be the best mother, ever! After this bucket...”

…

Rarity made her wait to the Apple’s farm, passing a disgusting scene that was clearly from a drunkard staggering around. She made a point to tell the town constable about a mare smelling of vomit that had defecated during her walk of shame. Refusing to have her magic sullied with the waste of another pony, she instead stood back a ways and used her magic to shove a whole portion of the path into the grass.

“There, now nopony has to worry about seeing such a nasty thing in the walkways. How can anypony just do that so seemingly casually? Bleh.”

Walking carefully for a while, checking ahead of her path to avoid stepping in something she’d regret for days, Rarity finally noticed the fence marking the Apple’s land. Fruit trees extended far beyond what she could see, so she ignored that and instead made the usual trek to the entrance of the acres.

Seeing a more traditional farm to her left as she passed, Rarity wondered how the vegetables were coming along. It was only a couple months until the Harvest, followed by Nightmare Night. Something she knew she could do was dress Snickers in an outfit befitting his unique personality.

“Oh, hello, Miss Smith. Do you have a moment to talk?”

“Eh, yeah. Ah guess so… once, when Ah was a young mare, there was a stallion what’d come by the farm every couple moons. He was sellin’ some fancy floor polish, ya see. Now, we didn’t have a need fer no sweet smellin’ floor cleaner when elbuh grease and water’d work just fine ‘n dandy.

“Pa, he went’n told’m ta take his snake oil ta somepony else. Never did see that feller again, but ta this day, Ah wonder if that stuff would’a worked and saved me hours on my knees. Now, that’s a story! When Ah was younger than you are now--”

“Yes, thank you for the riveting story, however I was hoping you could tell me how to be a great mother, just like you.”

A second passed, then another. “Ah must have a pea stuck in mah ear. What’d ya say?” she asked tilting her head and tapping her temples while working her jaw.

“I was hoping to speak with you about something important, about how to be a mother.”
Granny’s ears perked three quarters of the way up. “I recently adopted a colt and must parent him in a more effective way. How do you do it, and to keep it going once its started.”

“Uh, yer not makin’ much sense at all. Ya wanna be a mother to a foster ya just, what, found on the way home?”

“Oh, certainly not,” Rarity giggled, “he’s an orphan from some sort of accident, we presume. We’ve gone through the EFS, as is the right way to go. He was actually given to me, since many other adults are quite busy with their own tasks with foals of their own.”

“Oh, Ah get ya. So, ngyahh,” Granny groaned in thought, “what’s eaten yer ernges, exactly?”

“I’m inexpericend actually parenting and was wondering if you could tell me the secret on how you’ve done it so well.”

The old mare looked at Rarity, then laughed for at least eight seconds. “Well, if’n that ain’t the funniest dern thing Ah heard in a zap apple’s age. Filly, there ain’t no secret ta doin’ what a mother needs ta do. Ya just love’m, set gentle rules, and listen to ‘em. Now, don’t go takin’ that literally, ya hear,” she narrowed her eyes at Rarity. “The last thing a foal yer talkin’ about needs is a strict life er a mother hoverin’ over him like a storm cloud waitin’ and watchin’.

“What ya gotta do is this, ask yerself what you’d want done to ya if ya were in their place. And that don’t mean give’m cookies ‘n cream everytime they do somethin’, neither! Ya gotta ask yerself the question fer real. If Apple Bloom breaks a cup, ya think I’m gonna tan her hide with a switch or give her some jam?

“No! Ah ain’t doin’ a thing but askin’ her why and havin’ her clean it up. If she’s a party ta cuttin’ down a neighbor’s tree, what d’ya think I’d do?” she asked.

“Well, perhaps again sit her down and ask her why, then punish her accordingly.”

“What’s yer meanin’? What’d you do if that colt ‘a yers cuts down a tree?”

“Well,” she thought it over and tapped her chin. “I supposed I’d ask why, then ground him for the rest of the week without dessert.”

“Mare, that’s durn foolish. Ya think yer gonna stop a young’n from eatin’ sweets just cuz ya said so? Even if ya lock’m in his room he’s got friends by now that’d sneak him candy and cakes. If ya wanna play it soft, ya find a way ta bring it outside and then confront him, but don’t be yellin’ ta the town about what he did.

“Ya tell him why it’s wrong and the harm it does to the neighbors. Bein’ outside just makes it so he gets seen bein’ scolded, even if ponies don’t know why,” she rocked in her chair some, “the point is ta let them think other ponies are disappointed in them, not you. You just tell’m the facts that the tree won’t give shade on the hot days anymore.

“The foals that go to visit won’t have a place ta rest if it was their favorite spot. The tree could’a been from their parents, somethin’ they planted when they was born. Ain’t no reason ta go tannin’ hides or makin’ them shout back when they don’t have a durn good reason, ya hear?”

Rarity nodded enthusiastically. “I do! Thank you, Granny. I appreciate what you’ve told me more than you can know.”

“Heh, just doin’ what a good parent would do, ya know.”

Rarity smiled at the grinning mare and took her leave with a basket of various Apple family treats forced upon her.

I do believe a new mare will greet that little colt and everything will turn for the better in no time.

The Curse of Hope and Harmony

Snickers, Rarity, and Sweetie tucked into bed under Sweetie’s green aura pulling the blanket over them. Rarity kissed each on their forehead before sighing. “It’s great to be home.”

Sweetie grinned. “Yeah, I missed it. When’re mom and dad gonna be back? I wanna hug ‘em like I haven’t seen ‘em forever.”

Snickers stayed silent, looking at the ceiling.

“Oh, I haven’t thought of them. They’re gone so often, a week a month for mother’s work, and you know she just has to take father along for her stress relief.”

Snickers snorted very quietly.

“Is there something you’d like to add?”

“No,” he replied, “just the loss of innocence and hypersexulization of modern Equestria.”

Sweetie sat up to look over Rarity. “Hey, don’t complain about my world when you don’t even know yours.”

“Sweetie?! That was uncalled for, apologize.”

Sweetie fell back and crossed her forelegs. “No, he should apologize. Just ‘cause he’s a colt he thinks he can get away with saying whatever he wants.”

“Regardless of the fact, apologize to him.”

Snickers sat up and looked at them both. “‘Because I’m a colt’,” he mocked Sweetie. “Forget you both; we’re back home, so I’m going to my room to sleep in my own bed for the first time in my life here.”

Rarity didn’t stop him when he threw the covers off and stomped to the door, opened it, then slammed it behind him. Snickers went to his room after passing the bathroom and remembering the night everything started, then he went in and looked around. It was as clean as the first time he’d seen it, the toilet was spotless, the soaps were restocked, and the room smelled of blueberry.

He stood just inside the doorway for a minute, then went to his room. Leaving the light off, he climbed into the bed and snuggled onto the pillow. “My own bed. My own room. I can’t believe how lucky I am to have it so good. A mom that loves me, an aunt that cares. Rainbow Dash to teach me how to be and stay awesome. Fluttershy to listen and hold me.

“What else could I ask for?”

He closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep, a white void welcoming him into its embrace.

*-*-*

Snickers inhaled deeply, lips pressed to his forehead as he heard Rarity speaking softly. He felt tears leaking from his eyes. “Let it go,” she said softly. Love, trust, and memories flashed through his mind and he whimpered. The forehoof against his chest he held onto was warm, but tugging away from him.

He let Rarity go suddenly and fell back, looking around the hospital room. “What the fuck?!” He shouted and slapped the floor between his legs.

“Snickers, after such a magical moment I’d expected you to have more of a positive reaction.”

Rarity scolded him while Sweetie, still hanging from a contraption looked down at him with a frown. She quickly drew the shorthand sign for a bit, enraging him. “Shut up, you shut up, too!” He pointed at Rarity who stood over him and shook her foreleg. “What about the last day? What about the last couple years?!

“What happened to all that?”

“Snickers, I haven’t a clue what happened to you when you welcomed Harmony into your heart, but this is not the reaction one typically has. Shall we remind you of the good you’ve experienced since you began the day… after our disagreements when you arrived?”

Snickers spat at her hooves, getting her to hop back in disgust. “You don’t know what you’re talking about! I spent time with you, both of you going through hell. You were our protector, Sweetie was a singer. She got her mark for singing and distracting the guards so I could break you out of their cages!”

“I got my mark?! Cool, what was it?”

Snickers opened his mouth and exhaled a short, tiny squeak. He didn’t know.

“Snickers, you know my sister and her friends have their little club you’ve joined just today, and teasing her about her mark isn’t something you should do, knowing how important it is to her.”

He stepped back until he bumped his rump against the wall. “Wh-what? N-no, y-you lost your hair to lice and fleas. Don’t you remember?”

Rarity gasped with a forehoof on her chest. “As if. I care about my mane and tail far too much to not know several spells to keep my entire body parasite free. Not to mention a way I can make shampoo from any,” she hurked, “compost… as a last resort, mind you.”

He looked between them with fear, sadness, and confusion growing inside him. “No… no!” he shouted and ran past Rarity. She let him go, believing he needed to work his issues out like any colt his age should; through crying and spending time alone with his thoughts.

He ran down the hall, following the same path he’d followed earlier with Rainbow Dash to the waiting room, meeting a dead end with a snack room to the right and a janitor’s closet to the left. There wasn’t even a window to show him what was on the other side. He turned and galloped, starting to cry as he got lost, everything being too large for him to navigate around while mentally mapping his path.

He tried to remember events that had happened, he tried to remember Sweetie’s cutie mark. He only remembered two names, but didn’t have faces to go with them. How could he have gone years with Sweetie and Rarity, but not made any friends between them all that needed names?

Rarity lost her foreleg… the same one he was holding when he woke up. He shut his eyes and fought the thoughts. He didn’t wake up, he was still asleep. He had to wake up, it was all a bad dream he could wake up from and go back to the life he’d built.

He ran into somepony, their bodies tumbling over one another ending with the other on top. He heard a mature mare’s voice, next. “Oh, my. Are you okay? Don’t cry, I didn’t hurt you when we rolled over, did I? Nurse?! Help!”

There was a flurry of hooves clippity-clacking to them and Snickers heard mares asking questions of him and the other mare. He waved his legs and cursed them all, getting them to stop their attentive tasks. “Get the fuck off me, what the hell? I’m a fuck up, leave me alone! I can’t even dream right!”

He was on his hooves, tears blinding him as he looked blindly around. A green blur moved in front of him and stomped a hoof. “Look, I don’t care who you think you are or what happened, but you will not talk about yourself like that ever again, got it?” She poked him in the chest. Before he could retort, she went on. “And you don’t get to talk bad about dreams, those are all some ponies have to keep them going, even you.”

Another poke prodded him before she was shoved back by what he thought was a nurse who moved closer to him and knelt down. “Young stallion, do you know where your mommy is?”

The sound was akin to a wet towel being snapped when he slapped the mare with all he had. He was enveloped with a magic aura and tugged away from the group just as the mare he’d struck screamed at the cut he’d given her. He heard one of the nurses passing out while he was moved away from the gathering.

“Put me down, now!”

The clopping of hooves kept moving until they entered a room and the door closed. “What was that?” the mare from before asked him in a hushed tone.

“What’re you talking about? I didn’t do anything nopony had coming.”

“Your grammar…” she whispered, “look, my name’s Lyra, what’s your name?”

“Fuck you, that’s my name. Now let me go before I piss on your face,” he tried to fight free, he felt himself lowered to her eye lever.

“Try that now, smart guy.” He growled at her and snapped his teeth in her direction. “What’s your problem?!”

“I don’t know! I finally felt happy, I was finally part of a family… and it was all a dream! Fucking Harmony raped my mind and filled my head with a bunch of lies,” he turned his muzzle away from her, trying to hide his trembling lip.

She sighed and moved him to a bed, lying him down on it. He covered his eyes with his posterns and breathed in sharp breaths.

“Look, Harmony is a weird thing. I know it better than you might think,” he heard her say, “I was a filly and welcomed Harmony into my heart after a huge fight with my parents because I didn’t want to be arranged to marry a colt… because I didn’t and don’t like colts that way,” Snickers peeked at her.

“My parents are traditional unicorns and marrying me into another house would have gotten them a monthly stipend of the other family’s wealth, all I had to do was foal before I was 12,” she shook her head. “I was seven at the time. I barely knew about the specifics of unicorn society, then I’m thrown into the deep end like a zebra and told to swim.”

He sat up and looked at her. “Y-you know they can’t swim; Zebra’s.”

She shrugged. “Not usually, but some can get special training and are pretty good. There’s a zebra in the Everfree you should meet, she went to the lake one year and she swims like a fish. Fast, accurate, and can even slap a mare’s flank under water like…” she bit her lip and looked into space.

“Hey, stop thinking about getting hooved by a stripe! That’s just wrong.”

She came back to the world and looked at him in shock. “That’s a horrible thing to say, and racist. You can’t call a zebra that.”

“The fuck I can’t,” he glared at Lyra. “They’re worthless and better off dead then--” Lyra closed his mouth with magic and moved closer to him with ill intent in her eyes.

He tried to back away but her magical hold was on the space his muzzle was, not on his body. “When I let your naughty muzzle go, you’re going to apologize to me for saying that. Then,” her eyes seemed to literally darken, “you’re going to apologize to Zecora when you meet her. Do I make myself clear?”

He couldn’t stop nodding while looking into her eyes. When she let him go he apologized, backing up until he was sitting on the pillow. “What the…”

“That’s just something I learned dealing with my marefriend,” Lyra said with a twist of her head to send her mane over her back.

“Is she some kind of eldrich abomination that you have to tame?” He asked, she whispered something he couldn’t hear, but she was smiling when she looked at him again.

“Anyway, it sounds like parents are a touchy and slappy subject for you; so who’s watching you?”

He climbed from the pillow and lay on the bed, still guarded. “Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy, to a lesser extent Sweetie Belle, then at the bottom is a puddle of pee, then I guess Rarity, since I have to be back.”

She nodded. “Great, so let’s get you back to her so she and I can have a talk. Can you walk with me, or should I carry you with your muzzle zipped shut and legs bound until you’re in her magic again?”

…

Lyra walked into the room and greeted Rarity, who was shocked and took Snickers from Lyra’s magic and set him on the floor. Snickers and Lyra moved to Sweetie’s side while two nurses and a doctor stood before Rarity, who was apologizing for spanking a nurse and throwing her into the hallway.

“-can’t apologize enough. Should you ever need anything, I’ll create you an ensamble for 40% off. Please, can you forgive me for acting so rashly?”

The doctor looked at his nurse, who was flanked by another nurse as a witness. She spanked nurse glared at Rarity. “I want those shoes, then we’re even.”

“Wha-?! But-”

“That way she can’t hurt anypony else while here,” the nurse justified her statement and looked back to Rarity, who was flabberghasted and stuttering. Finally she frowned.

“Fine, if that’s the way you wish to play the game, then you may have them, but my offer is recinded if you go through with this.”

The nurse smirked. “I’ll take the loss, hoof ‘em over.”

“Doctor, can’t we work something else out?” Rarity whined.

“No, the punishment fits the crime. My nurse has a mark from your shoe on her haunch, it’s reasonable she takes your weapon away.”

Rarity whimpered, whined, then slid her shoes off and kicked them one by one to the nurse. “There, I hope you’re happy,” she pouted.

The nurse kicked one gently and gasped. She stepped onto one and the put her weight on her leg with a sigh. The rest were on her hooves and she bounced in place. “Wow, these are amazing. Too bad you had to wear such amazing shoes and then abuse my poor back side with them, huh?”

Rarity took a threatening step toward the other mare, but was stopped by the doctor’s foreleg between them. “Mares, let’s not act rashly over shoes. Nurses, please leave. Miss Rarity, please stay and think about what you did.”

Rarity stomped each of her hooves in frustration while the staff left, the nurse wearing her shoes began bragging about them before she left. The doctor turned back. “And please, remember you have foals in the room, so don’t act so petulantly.”

He shut the door with his magic, leaving an angry and sad Rarity behind him. Snickers moved closer to her, then remembered everything that had happened earlier in the day from having soap for lunch to having ice put somewhere it shouldn’t have been. He didn’t know how, but he blamed Rarity for it all.

Lyra noticed him moving, then his face turn to anger, so she stepped up to Rarity to comfort her. Sweetie looked down at Snickers, turning slowly. “So, feel better?” she asked casually.

“No, I’d rather go back to sleep and wake up where I was than be here for another minute.”

“Heh, I know what you mean. Sometimes dreaming is better than real life, but you’ve gotta wake up sometime, right?”

Their eyes met and he sighed in defeat. “What happened to me? Why’d all that happen? Show me such great things and then take them away?”

Lyra’s legs stopped in his periphial vision and he looked at her. “Harmony does exactly that, Snickers. It’s not going to torture you with good dreams and happy feelings; Harmony shows you what is possible if you accept it into your heart, just like everypony else has.”

“This sounds like a cultist religion,” Snickers replied.

“Well, it is technically a religion. We don’t have objects to worship or prayers to make… it’s more of a spiritual belief. There’s no one being or object that makes up Harmony, it just is. And when you become with it, it shows you what will bring you the best there is to complete yourself,” she looked at Rarity. “Does that make sense?”

“Hm, you’re quite on point, mostly. Snickers, what happened may seem like a terrible joke played on you, but like Lyra said, it only showed you what you needed to do to be happy with yourself. Is there anything I can do to help you understand?”

He nearly called her ‘mom’, clenching his teeth before it happened. “No, I need to think about this a bit, okay?”

“Of course.”
“Yeah,” Sweetie chimed in when her sister agreed.

Lyra tapped her hoof on her chin. “Snickers, I have a group I host you may like to join. Rarity, would he be a good candidate, do you think?”

Rarity looked at her, then memory sparked. “Oh, yes! I believe so, you should tell him.”

“Snickers, I host a group called “Love Thyself.” I got the idea when Princess Luna came to Ponyville’s Nightmare Night and wasn’t very happy with herself or her past. I believe you’d do great with us, won’t you come with me?”

He barely smirked at the opportunity to make a joke. “I dunno, maybe. Do I have to answer now?” he asked Rarity who was looked nonplussed.

“No jokes or innuendoes about what she said?” Rarity pointed at Lyra, who took a step away in defense.

“No, this’ more important that some stupid joke. This’ my life, okay?”

“Okay, darling. I apologize, I was only expecting what you’re shown me throughout the day. I can hardly be blamed for following the example you’ve set.”

He opened his mouth, stopped, then smiled. “Good point. Lyra, was it?”

“Yeah.”

He held his hoof up to bump. “Nice to meet you, I’ll be in touch about cumming with you.”

Rarity face hoofed and Sweetie giggled at Rarity. “Aren’t you glad you took the shoes off, sis?”

“Certainly, dear.”