Author's Note

Hey, everyone! I just wanted to thank y'all for the amazing response to the story so far! I hope that I can continue to write things that you'll love reading. As always, comments, questions, and criticisms are welcomed and appreciated. Enjoy!

A Place Called Equestria

My mouth felt like someone had stapled it to my chest. I stood there showing signs of complete incompetence as I gasped and stuttered at the figure that was before me. This talking equine happened to be yellow. No, no, I don’t mean that in an insulting fashion, I mean that literally. This was a yellow pony! She had bright blue eyes, and a pink mop of hair that was just as unruly as it was controlled. It fell over her left eye…or was it her right eye? I could never tell. Whenever she turned her head, the larger part of her massive volume of follicles went with her.

“Are you alright?” She asked me with a cock of her head.

I couldn’t deny the fact that she was quite cute. Her voice was soft and gentle, and it made me think of my own home and warm nights by the fireplace. She seemed friendly enough, but could I trust her? I mean, after all, she was a pony and I was a human being! Or…at least…I was at one point. Now, I wasn’t sure what I was or where I was or even what my name was! I certainly couldn’t keep calling myself by my human name. I mean, imagine if you got caught in an alternate dimension filled to the brim with talking ponies. Would you keep calling yourself Jim or Bob or Sarah? No sane person would!

I finally managed to regain control of my faculties. “I think so,” I said in answer to her query, “but…who are you?”

“Oh, my name’s Fluttershy,” she said nicely, “what’s your name?”

Of course. She had to ask that. I had to be the nice, kind, mannerly person and ask her what her name was, knowing full well that she was going to return the same question. I had to think up a pony name, and fast! Her name’s Fluttershy, I began thinking to myself, that’s interesting. Vaguely artistic and extremely poignant when it comes to her soft speaking voice, but interesting nonetheless. Hm…what can I call myself?

I began looking around the forest, trying desperately to find something to name myself after. I saw it in an old Muppet movie, the one where Kermit the Frog is stuck in Manhattan with amnesia and he has to name himself after an old gas station advertisement. As most Muppet related things are, it was very well done, and I decided to try and emulate it. I quickly located some stones nearby and decided to use them to my advantage.

“I’m…Stony,” I said, and then suddenly looked at my backside, “Stony Tail.”

“That’s a really nice name!” She said, “and, if I may say so, you have a very nice cutie mark.”

She pointed to my…flank, and there was a mark of a pony delivering pizzas. They have pizza delivery in this world? I asked myself, this is gonna be my life now, isn’t it? I hope they at least know how to make good pizza!

“Um…thanks,” I said, going along with everything she was doing, “so, where exactly am I?”

Now it was her turn to experience what I’m now calling the “stapled mouth effect.” Her jawline suddenly became three sizes larger, and she seemed to be as disoriented as I had been. I waved my…er…hoof in front of her face and she snapped back to reality. “Sorry,” she said, “it’s just…everypony knows of The Everfree Forest. I’m a little surprised at your confusion.”

“I’m new in the area,” I said honestly, “and I must say, I’ve never heard of this Everfree Forest. Can you tell me about it?”

“I can,” she said, “but not here. It’s much too dangerous! We have to be moving along. We’ve spent too much time in one spot already!”

Goodnight in the morning! I said to myself, using an old Southern colloquialism, this pony’s off her rocker!

She didn’t say anything more, but grabbed my hoof and began running. Since I was not accustomed to three legs, let alone four, my own attempts to escape became rather crude and hilarious instances of stumbling along blindly. I could tell she was trying to be nice and not laugh, but it became impossible. By the time we had removed ourselves from the rather comforting mass of trees and bushes into the open air, she was giggling to her heart’s content.

“Forgive me for laughing,” she sputtered, “but you look as if you’ve never run on three hooves before!”

“Sister…you have no idea,” I said.

She gave me an odd look, but then led me into a little town that was nearby. It was quaint, with small rows of cottages built upon each other. Each one looked similar to the one beside it, yet it seemed to hold its own sense of personality and individuality. They were basic homes, with cobblestones for exteriors and four or five windows apiece. They each had small, well-kept yards, and the gardens were magnificent. I stared with wide eyed wonder at the pure brightness of the flowers that grew there.

“Wow…” I breathed.

My new companion giggled again. “I see you’re interested in our gardens,” she said, “you chose to visit Ponyville at the right time. It’s the middle of our spring floral competition!”

“Ponyville?” I asked.

She nodded. “Yep! Ponyville! The friendliest town in Equestria!”

Equestria, I said to myself, so that’s what they call this place.

I had heard rumors that some underground scientists had been tinkering and toying with the idea that there was a place called Equestria. But I had thought nothing of it. Just some old geezers and young dreamers thinking way beyond the boundaries of what humanity can accomplish. But now, here I was! The very thing that I had poked fun at and made sport of for years was actually animate! Someone could, very literally, break through the wall and get to the other side.

I didn’t know what to do, so I just kept following Fluttershy. I was getting more attuned with my new hooves, and soon enough, it became as easy as walking on two legs. Truth be told, having four legs is actually better than having two, because one can spread the weight out more evenly. It was also very good for my health, as I found my heartbeat gaining speed as we were simply trotting. It was some of the best exercise I’d ever experienced. Note to self, I thought, see what we can do about getting two artificial legs done for athletic purposes back home. Imagine Major League Baseball, the NFL, the NBA, and the NCAA on four legs! There must be someone I could speak with about this!

I was lost in thought and I didn’t notice the giant tree in front of me, nor the fact that I suddenly picked up speed and began galloping with delight. “Look out!” One of the ponies shouted, but it was too late. For the second time in a twenty-four-hour period, some part of me became forced friends with an oak. I slammed into it muzzle first and I backed away from it with my teeth chattering. Then everything went black, and the last thing I remember was hitting the ground.