No Time To Talk

by Those Kids In The Corner

Rating: everyone
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Prince Blueblood, Random, Princess Celestia, Slice of Life
Length: 1007

In which Prince Blueblood completely misinterprets the situation.

Celestia and Twilight have their regular tea time, joined by Prince Blueblood. He later completely misinterprets why Twilight comes back.

Dumb little thing I wrote in the shower, cause I do that sometimes.

Published 2019-09-17 12:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-09-17 12:50:01 UTC

And I Also Don't Want To

On Wednesdays, Celestia and Twilight drink tea.

The meeting itself quite uneventful, first started from Celestia wanting a play-by-play retelling of “Twilight’s Tuesday Takeover Takedowns” to Twilight wanting more one-on-one preparation for her ascension to sole princess of Equestria. The tea was a welcome focus for when neither knew what to say in the lulls between conversation, or for the ancient alicorn to shoot coy looks hidden behind a teacup when she didn’t feel like giving a concrete answer to Twilight’s questions. This Wednesday was a little different. Twilight asked a question that dear old Celestia hadn’t thought of or planned for.

What happens to Prince Blueblood?

And so the unicorn prince was invited to tea. Finding him was more difficult than expected, and the pair decided against enquiring why he was found in a room filled with old broken mirrors, relishing in his multi-angled visage in varying contortionist poses.

Blueblood was less than pleasant, but overall amicable enough, akin to a badger draped in fine silk. He sat contentedly for the whole duration of the meeting, undaunted by the divine powers greater than he, sipping tea he could pronounce but not spell. He occasionally rambled about nonessential things to himself, so the two princesses held most of the relevant conversation amongst themselves. The younger of the two wrote notes with surprising ferocity in a hoofbound book large enough to qualify as a tome. Blueblood watched the birds outside the window, tuning out the talk of his possible future in favor of brief entertainment.

The meeting ended methodically, albeit swiftly. Twilight had previously opted to leave Canterlot by train rather than by wing, and having to search for the elusive prince ate up more time than she anticipated. It was such a sudden departure that ended up with the young princess leaving a vital part of her preparations and bearing a large amount of frustrations. It was upon that realization of loss that lead her back to the meeting room’s door, and the brief bout of anxiety that lead her to knock. The face that greeted her was one she didn’t expect, nor one she particularly wanted to see.

“Ah, I didn’t expect to see you back so soon.” Blueblood, ever impetulant and egotistical, was still here. How unfortunate. At a glance, Celestia had long since vacated the room, likely for the handoff of the sun and moon. Twilight gave a guilty half smile to be polite.

“Yeah, I left something behind by accident, I was just going to--”

Blueblood cut her off. “Oh ho, I see.”

She drew back, and her voice lilted with confusion. “Uh, you do?”

“Yes, this is where you finally confess your undying love for me.”

Twilight didn’t react much to that sentence, physically. She stood, a dumbfounded expression etched across her face with such excellent precision that you’d think she would have been carved from stone. Her tail did not twitch, her legs did not shuffle, and her eyes did not stray from her thousand-yard stare. Her mind, however, raced with a hundred questions before grinding to an abrupt halt, reeling with one simple question.

Her right ear twitched. ”W-what?” she sputtered, dignity fleeting.

Blueblood, ever oblivious, didn’t notice her confusion. He rolled his eyes and turned away from the open door. “I mean, it was rather obvious. The side-eye glances, the twiddling of your mane, the sheer awe of being in my presence, the swooning over my magnificent body after I stepped into the room.” Now he’d done it. The purple mare was more shocked by his gross misconceptions than she had been when she learned of her pink friend’s near EIA level of intelligence of the Ponyville populace.

She stammered dumbly, “I-I don’t think--”

“Oh please, you don’t have to go into detail. When you have the opportunity to be around someone as lovely as I... Well of course I cannot blame you for being enamored with me and my,” Blueblood turned back to the shell-shocked alicorn and finished his sentence with a flourish. “Ravishing success.”

Twilight, gaining mental clarity, raised a hoof and began to plead, looking very much eager to end this conversation. “That’s not what--”

Blueblood cut her off once more with a tremendous sigh while his hoof took a short, unconsciously performed air-jaunt. “Yes, yes, you didn’t fall madly in love with me for my success or my looks, but my sharp mind and wits.” The unicorn raised his left hoof to his forehead and brought it back dramatically. “The massive brain sitting above my shoulders can be quite the burden to carry sometimes, when you know the solution to every problem and everyone comes to you for your humble and wise advice.”

Twilight nearly sneered at his idea of mastery over anything but how to eat a pastry without tasting it. “You misundersta--”

“Or maybe it is my undying humbleness and charisma that has rattled you so? It’s hard being so chivalrous too, you know. Easy to be used by the lesser folk.” Interrupted again, Twilight grew irritable. The look of objective confusion on her face morphed into annoyed disbelief mixed with revulsion, her head setting back and mouth slightly open like a viper ready to strike. “But I don’t let that get me down, I cannot let a few short transgressions mar my humble and magnificently sculpted face with sorrow or anger, I must do as is my duty and--”

“MY JOURNAL!”

Blueblood finally focused on the glaring princess for the first time that evening. “Your... Journal?”

Twilight snorted in a very unprincesslike manner. “Yes, I left my journal here. Can I please get it?” Her left eye twitched. Blueblood’s followed sympathetically.

A hopeful set of eyebrow rose. “Is it laden with poems of your desire for--”

”No! It doubles as a cookbook and I was making stew tonight.”

“Oh. Well. Ahem.” The stallion stepped back from the doorway, the light from the setting sun shining down on Twilight like a glorious celestial reward. “Carry on.”