Cross the Rubicon: Choices
Chapter One Hundred and Eighty Two: When Everything Feels Like It's Just Too Much...
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The air was cold on her back, and Sunset found her mind wandering, even as she tried to focus on Twilight’s hand in hers. It was too bad that the damage to her shirt had been so extensive…she had been looking forward to keeping it. Between the bloodstains and the multitude of holes in it though, it was fairly unsalvageable—maybe she could ask Rarity about getting another one?
—We could, but why? Why not get something done on our jacket instead? I bet she could put our cutie mark on it.—
Now there was an idea. Her jacket would look pretty nice with her mark embroidered in large size on the back…
Pain flared as cold metal pulled a rather large piece of wood out from her back and she couldn't stifle the loud yelp.
“Are you sure you don't want something to put you to sleep while we do this?” the nurse asked her again. “We’re only about halfway done.”
Sunset listened to the sound of the wood being dropped into the metal dish. “I’m sure…” she grunted, not wanting to tempt fate with the effect anesthesia would have on a magical human body. Not when she had enough knowledge about the dangers of putting a unicorn under without an inhibitor ring on their horn. The last thing she wanted was to accidentally set the hospital on fire. “...just warn me about the bigger ones, would you? Those actually sting a lot.”
“Consider yourself warned,” was the response.
Rolling her eyes, she squeezed Twilight’s hand. “This is gonna take a while. You sure you don't want to sit outside with Cady?”
Twilight shook her head vehemently and held on tighter.
“Okay, okay—I wasn't going to make you. Just…didn't think you'd enjoy seeing them pull a hundred and one splinters out of my backside.”
“…one hundred and twenty three,” Twilight whispered stiffly. “Only forty seven are in your butt.”
She flashed her a grin, wincing in the middle as two more pieces landed in the metal dish. “I guess I shouldn't be surprised that you counted. Maybe we should downplay it a little to your parents? I…don't want to freak them out too much.”
The long stare she got in turn made her wince. “Right. Okay. Maybe a bad idea then? I just don't want them to worry about something that's over and done.” She grunted at the feeling of them pulling a particularly long piece out of her right shoulder. “I’m okay—it's just some splinters, and it could have been a lot worse. I don't have any broken bones.” Sunset was fairly sure Applejack did, and maybe Fluttershy as well…both had been tanking a lot of damage against Sombra’s shadows.
“You got lucky,” the doctor interrupted. “You could have been hurt a lot worse. With the amount of bruising we’re seeing here, you’ll be lucky if you can even walk tomorrow.”
—Thanks, doc. Really helping us calm Sparky’s anxiety. Read the room, lady!—
Blue-green eyes went back to Twilight, who was now clutching Sunset’s one hand in both of hers. “Hey…what’s wrong?”
“…Sunny…you’re…family…” she started, sounded worse than before. “…please…no hiding injuries from Mom and Dad?”
Oh. “…centaur-farts,” she sighed. This had backfired, in the worst way. “…alright. No more secrets. I…owe them…and you…a lot of truth.” She let out a hiss at more slivers pulled free from her flesh. “Son of an inbred, three legged goat! That hurt!”
The doctor didn't sound at all sympathetic when she replied, “You’ve still got a few dozen to go, kiddo, and then we get to disinfecting and stitching up the worst ones. This is going to get worse before it gets better, and it's too late now for us to give you anything.”
“…I’m beginning to miss Hell,” she grumbled.
Sunset let out a sigh of relief as the painkillers started to kick in, turning the pain into a dull throb and ache. She didn't move from her face down position, and just savored the sensation of Twilight’s fingers running through her hair as she drowsed.
A knock at the door roused her, and she turned her head. “Come in!”
Rarity hobbled in, her leg wrapped almost to the knee in a thick padded bandage, her sparkly purple toenails peeking out the end, followed by Applejack who was moving gingerly and stiff and had her whole arm in a sling and her hand in a cast. “We figured we’d check on you, darling, before we head back to the farm.”
“‘M fine,” Sunset grunted.
Twilight sighed. “She has nearly forty stitches spread out over her back. They are recommending she rest, and eat lots of high iron food to bring her blood cell count back up—they had to give her a pint here, and thankfully her blood type is normal enough. The biggest risk is infection, but they hit her with some antibiotics just in case.”
“…like I said, I’m fine. Just tired. Need rest, some Sun Bites. Lots of food.” She squinted. “…make sure Dash knows to eat,” the redhead told them, gathering her wits about her to impart some vital knowledge. “She used a lot of her energy, and she was on the verge of thaumic sickness--she needs to eat as many Sun Bites as you can get her to ingest to rebalance her levels, and as much real food as she can to restore her reserves….All of you do, really, magic is energy. Energy is calories. Eat lots to get them back.”
“Ain't gotta worry there, sugar. Granny invited Dash an’ Pinkie an’ Fluttershy an’ their folks over fer the weekend an’ fer a potluck. Gonna be talkin’ ta them about what happened…and bringin’ ‘em in on magic being a thing. Not like they can tell us no—magics here ta stay, and Granny thinks it'll be easier fer us if they know.”
Sunset hummed. “Family’s okay…but just the ones you live with…Equestria…and Earth…aren't ready…to meet yet.”
Rarity smiled. “Don't worry, Sunset. We fully plan to impress upon them the need for secrecy, and Granny is on our side. She sends her love, by the way, and she is glad you're alive. Everyone was very worried about you for a time.”
“Yup. Mac apparently beat up yer math teacher.”
Crotchety old Pythagorus? “Wow. I knew he hated me, but…what’d he do to get Big Mac mad?”
“Was celebratin’ yer fate when noone was sure if ya’d lived’r not.”
Yikes.
--Never did like him. Crusty old sheep dag from a ram with chronic trots.--
Harsh much?
--Not after some of what he’s said to us.--
Yeah, okay, fair point. Sunset winced all the same--trying to keep something of a neutral peace with her calculus teacher had been a Rockhoofian feat for months. “...That's not going to earn me any points…maybe Principal Celestia will fire him? Or I’ll ask to transfer to a self study program. I…don't really need to keep up the pretense anymore of faking that I don't know calculus. I could use the period to do something productive.” She chuckled.
Twilight had been quiet, so it was a bit of a surprise when she asked, “What…about your parents?” to Rarity.
Rarity made a vague gesture. “Oh, Mother and Father don't even know anything happened yet. They went on a cruise Monday and aren't due back for another two weeks. Sweetie and I are at the farm in the interim….and truth be told, I suspect I will leave them in the dark. They…barely make note of my comings and goings as it is.”
“Oh…” Sunset could practically hear the frown in Twilight’s tone. “I…I’m sorry…I didn't mean to…”
“It's quite alright, darling. Mother is often unwell, and Father takes her to places that help improve her state. It is nothing new, and Sweetie and I are quite happy to stay with the Apples in the meantime.” The tailor patted Twilight’s hand. “And you did nothing wrong by asking—how else are we supposed to get to know each other if we don't ask questions and make conversation?”
Applejack chuckled, wincing a moment later. “An’ we love havin’ ya, darlin’.” She rubbed her side. “Anyway, Rares an’ Ah are headed out, but you both get some rest, an’ maybe next week we kin all get together ta…have a real meeting and get ta know ya, Twilight, without all the end of the world and evil demons being in the way.”
Sunset made a sound in her throat. “…yeah. Maybe next weekend. I think I’m…going to be out of commission for a while. That…took way more out of me than I want to talk about…even the Battle of the Bands wasn't this bad.”
—That's because you didn’t turn yourself inside out through your soul to defeat the Sirens.—
That was probably a good point.
“I would concur that the same is true for all of us, Sunset…I spoke to Fluttershy’s mother and learned she dislocated her shoulder and cracked her collarbone. Between that and Applejack’s ribs--”
“Seven of ‘em are cracked, the rest’re bruised. Hand’s gotta fracture or three from all the punching.” From the feral grin on the blonde’s face, this was clearly boasting, rather than complaint.
“Indeed, dearest, and I will endeavor to treat each of them as the heroic battlescars they are, but that is beside the point. What I was going to say,” Rarity continued firmly, “is that I propose we all take the week to rest and recover, and see how we are doing the week after. In the interim, we can keep each other updated in the group chat--I trust you can add Twilight and her friend Indigo to the appropriate places?” When Sunset grunted in affirmation, she smiled. “Lovely. It will allow us to remain in touch in case of emergencies. Now please…do try and get some rest, darling. You look positively dreadful.”
“Okay…yeah.” She could manage that. Her phone was…somewhere in the bag Fluttershy had thrown together for her from her locker.
Her friends left with a final farewell, and Sunset groaned. “…you think there’ll be food when we get back to your house?” she mumbled into the pillow.
Twilight let out a long sigh. “Yes. Mom hasn’t stopped cooking since the…Fight.”
“Oh.”
“It's how she copes.”
Sunset winced. “…I didn't mean to—”
Twilights cut her off. “You didn’t. I did. I…I acted out and…well…Indigo pointed out to me that…maybe I was a little jealous.”
Uh…what?
“Jealous? Of…what?” Sunset was confused now.
Fingers returned to running through her mane soothingly. “Of you and my parents and how you interacted with each other. It's…childish and petty, and I realize that now, but…it may have had some effect on my perceptions.”
The former unicorn was quiet as she tried to turn that over in her head, but found new information was still running into the wall of ‘just one thing too many’ on top of everything else that had happened in less than eight hours, and she could not manage to do more than acknowledge that she understood the language she was hearing. Though…part of that might have also been the painkillers, and she resolved to stick to the over the counter varieties after the ones from the hospital wore off. Shifting stiffly and wincing at the pull on aching muscles, she rolled to her side, holding up an arm. “Come here?”
Twilight froze. “…I—but—you said—”
“Sparky,” Sunset interrupted firmly. “Just…come here. I wouldn't have asked if I didn't want you to.”
Carefully, Twilight slipped onto the bed and stretched out next to her, stiff and awkward. Sunset sighed and hooked her fingers around the smaller girl’s waist to pull her closer. “You know that's not what I meant,” she chastised. “Even when we were just friends, you let me hold you like this.”
Relaxing into the hold, Twilight let out a ragged sigh that sounded close to tears. “I’m sorry, Sunset…I…”
“Shhh…” Sunset hugged her close. “…I know, okay? We have a lot of things to talk about…things that are broken between us…but…I want a chance to fix them…do you?”
“M-more t-than a-a-anything,” came the whimpered admission from her shoulder.
She squeezed her again. “Then we’ll get to that…we’ll find a way…just…not right this minute. It's like I said before: today has been…too much for both of us. I don't know about you, but my brain is…full. We’ve both been overwhelmed with pain and demonic rituals and soul magic and a journey the likes of which your people write lasting literature about. I had to personally deal with a lot of emotional garbage and forced introspection and a lot of the unresolved issues of my history dragged into full view in the noonday sun, with no way to hide it or look away, and I’ve had to deal with some uncomfortable truths…and I still have to deal with how that has scrambled my brain.”
Sunset blew a slow breath out her nostrils. “…Hell didn't just use you against me,” she admitted quietly. “It…used the princess against me too. Several times. I saw…a life I could have had, if the princess had just…wanted me the way I wanted her to…” She ignored the noise Twilight made. “...my point is, all of what has happened has brought up a lot of things I have to deal with before I’m capable of the kind of talk we need to have. Not because I don't want to talk it out with you, but because I need to be in a healthy, good place before I can hope to have the honest talk and not misplace any emotions that have nothing to do with you, or us, or our relationship and how I feel about you.”
Her eyes were closed, but she could feel the way Twilight pressed their foreheads together, and the way her arms gripped tightly where there weren't bandages. “Oh, Sunny…I had no idea…” She frowned. “...I mean, I know…what I heard…but some of it was foggy and dreamlike, which is why I didn’t know it was real until the last time, but…”
Sunset broke the impending ramble off with a brief brush of her lips over Twilight’s. “I know, and…I understand. We were a tad distracted, and it wasn't the right time. Its still not the right time, and it might take a few days or weeks to get everything sorted to the point where we are both in a good spot to talk…but that doesn't mean it wont happen. It means I want to make sure we do it right, with the best possible outcome, because I want to fix this as much as you do--though that should be pretty obvious from the sappy fantasies Hell was constructing to trap me in…that it sounds like you saw more than a little of.” She winced a bit. “Sorry about that, by the way.”
Twilight giggled a little, and shook her head. “Don’t apologize…I’m not sure it was all from you anyway. Some of those things might have been mine.”
Ooookay. That was something for Future-Sunset to unpack, because Present-Sunset still could not handle new info. Make a note please, and move on.
--I’m not our secretary or our message board, horn-head.--
You are until I have paper.
--And this is where our self-loathing originates.--
Ignoring the retort and the implications of Twilight’s previous statement, Sunset cleared her throat and focused on her original point. “...Anyway. What I was trying to get at was…just because we need to wait on that talk…doesn't mean I don't need you here with me. Or that you don't need me. That's what best friends do, right? Lean on each other when everything is awful and a mess and all you want to do is cry?”
Wet laughter met her ears. “…y-yes.”
“Then…we can do this…because I still have to explain magic and Equestria…and the whole being a unicorn thing to you and your family…and I have to do it without Princess Twilight’s help, because the portal is still screwed up.”
“Princess…Twilight?”
“…yeah. That's…the other thing about Equestria. It’s got—”
“Parallel counterparts. That's why you had that vision of my brother in armor trying to arrest you? Talking about Princess Celestia and Princess Cadenza?”
Sunset nodded. “…pretty much…but I only want to have to go over my sordid history once…so can we put that on hold until we’re in your living room with your family?”
Twilight sniffled and wriggled closer, trying to hug Sunset without disturbing any of the stitched up wounds on her back. “…can you just hold me until they get here then?”
“I think I can manage that.”
Time had crept by, Sunset humming Celestia’s lullaby to soothe them both. It couldn't have been more than an hour, but it felt like a small eternity as the pair drifted in and out of a light doze. A soft knock made Sunset lift her head, and call out groggily to permit entrance. “Think your family’s here,” she murmured.
“Good…this bed is terrible, Sunny. I want my bed.”
Cadence chuckled. “Hospital beds aren't made for two, Ladybug.”
Twilight made a grumpy sound and reluctantly wriggled free of Sunset’s embrace, making it as far as sitting up before her mother had her in a crushingly tight hug. She was crying, and Twilight seemed shocked for a moment before curling into the embrace with a near tangible feeling of relief, allowing Velvet to hold her tight. The redheaded teen just watched the reunion, her own relief gaining another layer to it as she realized that rescuing Twilight had meant returning her whole to her mother, who would have been devastated to lose her child.
Velvet refused to let go of Twilight, but one hand shifted to grasp Sunset’s tightly, and she found Velvet looking her way now. “I’m so sorry, girls…we never should have let this go on like this…we should have stopped this before it got to this point…you never should have been put in this situation…”
Wincing, Sunset forced her body into a sitting position so she could join the hug, squeezing the petite woman as firmly as she could. “Mrs. Velvet,” she said roughly, a lump in her throat. “It's not your fault…Cinch would have…she would have come for us regardless. There was…more at play than you know…and I’m sorry too…for my part in it…”
The woman shook her head, mumbling denials and apologies and refusing to let go of either of the teens. Sunset wasn't sure how to help, so she just submitted to the affection, despite the discomfort.
That was when Night Light entered the room, and Sunset was shocked to see how haggard he looked. His face was drawn and blue skin paled and half gray, and his eyes were red from crying. He held a clipboard in one trembling hand, which he passed off to Cadence so he could join the hug, kneeling on the floor so he could wrap his arms around all three females. “…thank heaven you're both safe…” he rasped.
Sunset had no idea how to feel, how to react, and her heart sank as she was struck with the knowledge that her being trapped in Hell herself would have been almost as terrible for this family as Twilight’s loss would have been. Guilt ate at her, and something she couldn't name, and she sucked in a wet breath, allowing herself a minute or two of weakness before she tried to pull free.
“…Any chance you're here to help me escape this place?” she tried to joke.
The hug broke up, and Night took the clipboard back from Cadence. “You have to fill this out yourself,” he explained, “but otherwise, we’re here to provide you transport.”
Velvet grabbed her hand again. “You’re coming home with us,” she said, a statement rather than a question. “I…need to know all of my children are safe and home with me,” she explained, her expression one of anguish that dug into Sunset.
She squeezed Velvet’s hand back. “That was the plan—you deserve the whole story…and…you deserve to hear it from me.”
“Us,” Twilight reinforced.
Sunset glanced at her girlfriend. “…right. Us.”
That seemed to soothe Velvet’s worries, and she pulled back enough to let Sunset sign a stack of forms and fill in some information, and then for the nurse to disconnect her from the requisite monitoring equipment. Sunset grimaced as she accepted the paper bag full of medicine. “…I have to admit, I’m not looking forward to riding in the car. Sitting hurts.”
“You could lay across my lap,” Twilight offered.
“Tempting…”
Velvet held up the bag she had brought with her. “After Cadence told us what you were here for, I took steps to acquire a soft pillow and a cold pack for you, sweetheart.”
Had she had them, her pony ears would have perked up at that. “Bad news, Sparky,” she told the girl next to her. “Your place as my most favorite human may have just been usurped by your mother.”
Twilight stuck a tongue out at her childishly. “I wasn't aware that was a list.”
Carefully easing to her feet because the world felt just a touch slanted—Sunset made a second private note to stick to regular painkillers if she needed them, since unicorns and narcotics were a bad mix—the teen flashed her a half smile. “Yeah. It's a recent thing. Needed it to counterbalance my list of least favorite humans.”
“That must be some list,” Twilight replied.
She shrugged, and followed the adults out of the hospital, ready to get this last hurdle over with so she could get some food and sleep.
Sunset was surprised she made it almost all the way out to the car—she could see the familiar vehicle parked a dozen spots away—when a throat cleared, and her attention was drawn to a short, heavy man with a goatee as the only appreciable amount of hair on his head. “Max?” she asked, eyeing him and his briefcase.
“Red,” he responded, and she immediately straightened up to pay attention. He normally addressed her as ‘Miss Shimmer’ and the change meant only one thing. He inclined his head to Velvet and Night. “Dr. Light, Mrs. Velvet. My apologies for interrupting your return home. Miss Shimmer is a client of mine, and I’m afraid I must take a moment of her time.”
Crossing her arms, Sunset asked, “What's this about, Max? I can afford the fee.”
He shook his head and reached into his briefcase. “Mother received your package, and the fees have been taken care of.” He held out a large yellow envelope to her, full of papers. “This is the documentation you need to look over for recent endeavors and investments, and today's expense report is on that.”
One brow arched. “And…this couldn't wait or be handled via an email or a phone call.”
“That’s not why I’m here, Red. I’m passing it on because I figured I’d save you a trip. No… I’m here to give you this.” Max Profits held out a second envelope, this one the kind of thing a personal letter would come in. “Mother sends her regards, and was hoping you could stop by for tea sometime this summer…and that you can bring your new friends if you so desire.”
That envelope was taken more like one might handle a dangerously unstable magical artifact or a live and very pissed off scorpion. “I assume the letter has more in it?”
He closed his briefcase. “I didn't ask. I will say that you put Mother in an exceptionally good mood today, however, so there’s that. She also said you shouldn't have to worry too much about mib-flies.”
Well, that was a relief. “Alright. Thanks, Max. I’ll…see you for our normal meeting after the holiday?”
“I already have you in my schedule, Miss Shimmer. Until then, I bid you a swift recovery.” Max gave her a cheerful wink and abruptly turned on his heel, disappearing between two groups of people moving across the parking lot.
Sunset could feel the eyes on her from Twilight and her family. “…yeah, that's part of the story. Can we…get out of here before anything else happens? Please?”
Author's Note
*rubs paws together* Bruhahaha.
Only two chapters to go after this.
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