A Treasury of Titillating, Taxing, Tizzy, Teasing, Terrifying Tales
Author's Note
I DON'T GET TURNED ON BY PONIES IT WAS NECESSARY TO THE PLOT.
Deadly Horse-gasm
Rainbow Dash stood in front of the two bars. Carpets and Drapes on the left, Donut Tavern on the right. Isn't weird how they put a lesbian bar and a normal bar right next to each other. How often do you see two places as different as those right next to each other. Rainbow Dash glanced at the bar on the left.
It's taunting me, she thought. Why did it have to be right here?.
"Alright. I'm gonna go in. I'm never gonna go near this place again if I don't go now." she said to herself. "What the fuck am I even doing?" Rainbow Dash took a deep breath and walked inside Carpets and Drapes.
It was a lot less crazy than she had expected. Ponies were sitting on the bar stools chatting and drinking. Some were sleeping. Some were eating. And a lot were standing in line for the bathroom. But mostly everypony was just chilling out, maxing, relaxing all cool. There was one pony passed out on the floor with a beer still in her mouth.
Rainbow Dash decided to look for a seat at the bar counter. She scanned the stools until she found a seat next to a yellow pegasus. She made her way over to the stool and sat down.
"Well well well, Rainbow fucking Dash" said a voice from next to her. Rainbow turned to see a drunk Fluttershy sitting taking a long drink from a glass.
Her hair was ruffled and she had a few dark circles below her eyes. She looked like she hadn't slept in a while.
"Fluttershy? What the hell are you doing here?" Rainbow Dash asked, with an eyebrow raised.
"I've been uh, I've been coming here for a while." she replied with a few burps here and there. "I just never told anybody about it."
"Anypony."
"Ex-fucking-scuse me?"
"It's anypony, not anybody."
"Who fucken cares." Fluttershy went to take a drink from her glass and she realized it was empty. "Hey sweetheart!" she called to the bartender. "Why don't you bring over another glass of Everfree Vodka for me and a second glass for my friend here."
A minute later Rainbow Dash was greeted with a glass of vodka engulfed by the purple aura from the bartender's horn. She placed it on the counter in front of Rainbow Dash and the aura dissipated.
"Enjoy sweetie." she said to her.
Rainbow Dash stared at the drink in front of her, the ice cubes floating about and surrounded by tiny little bubbles. Should she really drink it? She had been infamously known to not be able to hold her liquor very well since the "Incident That Doesn't Have a Name Incident"
She turned to look at Fluttershy who was already halfway through with her glass. She took only a brief moment to catch her breath before downing the rest of it.
Rainbow Dash took a deep breath. Here goes something. She picked up her glass and took a very long sip from it. She could feel the savory liquid slide down her throat.
"Woah. That's actually some pretty good shit right there." Rainbow says drinking the rest of her vodka. "Hey- *burp* Don't you think it's weird that we say good shit, and the word shit is used to describe stuff that's shitty?"
"Woah dude. I never thought about it like that." said Fluttershy, staring with WIDE eyes at the wall behind Rainbow.
Rainbow asked for another drink. Within a minute the bartender had another glass full of har vodka. She took one sip of it and was able to force it down. A few seconds later it came right back up. Rainbow blocked her mouth with a hoof but she couldn't hold back the vomit for long. Some drip down her chin until finally she could hold it no more. It came pouring out of her mouth. It was sort of a brownish color with hints of orange. It propelled itself out of Rainbow Dash's mouth onto the counter. She slipped off of her stool and onto the floor. She landed on her back and began to vomit again. This time it went straight into the air and gravity pulled it back down.
Then the next thing Rainbow knew she was hunched over a toilet bowl spitting little globs of vomit into the toilet with Fluttershy holding, her hair back. She closed her eyes.
And the next time she opened them she was being dragged across the ground by Fluttershy towards her cottage.
Fluttershy let go of Rainbow to open the door and resumed dragging her across the ground. Fluttershy hoisted Rainbow up and onto the couch.
Rainbow turned her head towards Fluttershy.
"Thanks dude, I owe you one."
Fluttershy just smiled and collapsed on the the floor. That was the last thing Rainbow saw before drifting off to dream-land.
The dream began with Rainbow Dash standing in a black void. Nothing but nothing as far as the eyes could see. Then suddenly another Rainbow Dash appeared a few feet away. She seemed to look more tired and drunk than actual Rainbow. Her hair was raggedy, her eyes dark and lifeless, her face covered in dirt.
This other Rainbow opened her mouth. A loud gurgling sound was heard before rainbow colored liquid started to pour out of her mouth. The liquid was filling up the void at an alarming rate. Real Rainbow felt something brush her leg. She looked down and saw a magazine. It was a porn magazine. A rainbow juice soaked, porn magazine.
"Oh shit! It's my first PlayPony issue! I remember finding this in my dad's underwear drawer because I mistook it for my mom's underwear drawer because I wanted to know if I was supposed to underwear, when I was like eight!" Rainbow said, picking up the magazine. "Those were the days."
She realized that the pony on the front cover wasn't Cheval de chienne in her usual provocative pose, it was Fluttershy. Dressed in lingerie (which only covered the parts that didn't need to be covered) and excessive amounts of makeup.
Rainbow felt a hoof on her shoulder. She turned to see Fluttershy wearing a strap on.
"TIME TO HAVE SOME FUN!" she yelled manically, before sliding the strap on dildo into Rainbow. It went in so easily that it didn't even register at first but the pain came very very fast.
Fluttershy whipped Rainbow around so she was laying on her back and then thrust back inside her. Fluttershy's eyes began to glow red, and smoke of the same color flowed out of her mouth. The smoke traveled through the air like tendrils of hair. It made it's way towards Rainbow Dash and forced itself inside her mouth. After that something clicked inside Rainbow Dash. She began to almost enjoy this. And then she woke up.
Her head vigorously popped off the pillow. She looked around the room and saw that she was in Fluttershy's cottage.
"Shit, that's right. Fluttershy dragged me home last night." Rainbow said, rubbing her eyes. She turned to see Fluttershy sitting in a chair drinking tea.
"Oh, good morning Rainbow Dash. Did you sleep well?" Fluttershy said after taking a sip of tea.
"Uh yeah. No yeah I slept good." Rainbow replied.
"Oh good, would you like some tea?"
"I guess."
"Ok, just let me finish my tea first." Fluttershy took one last sip of her tea.
"I'm done now." She got up and walked to the kitchen, humming a very familiar tune along the way.
She is so much different when she's sober, Rainbow thought to herself. She sat upright on the couch and rubbed her forehead. She was beginning to feel the hangover and it was an extra, extra, extra, extra, extra bad one too. Enough to make you barf when you try stand up apparently because that's exactly what happened when Rainbow tried to stand up.
"Oh shit!" Rainbow yelled very loudly. Almost loud enough for someone in the other room to hear.
"Oops I mean, oh shit." She grabbed a couch cushion and frantically attempted to wipe up the disgusting shit she spit out on poor Fluttershy's floor.
"Oh shit oh shit oh shit shit shit!" As if smaller text would help!
" Oh Rainbow Dash! I'm coming to bring you your tea-eeee! I hope that there aren't any messes to clean up because you don't how many times I've had to clean up Angel's pee-eeee!"Fluttershy walked into the living room with a teacup full of some of that good old Earl Hey. "Oh my! Rainbow Dash did you throw up on the carpet? Let me clean that up for you."
"Oh no Fluttershy you don't have the do that it's my mess I'll clean it up."
"No no I insist, you're the guest."
"Fluttershy please, let me help."
"Oh, ok um, can you go get the Moxi Clean bottle from underneath the kitchen sink."
"Yeah sure." Rainbow Dash said before retrieving the legally safe knock off cleaning product.
After cleaning up the vomit the two of them sat down on the couch to drink their tea.
Every so often a sip from one of their teacups would break up the long uncomfortable silences. Very long and very uncomfortable. Then, for some reason, Rainbow felt compelled to speak.
"Soooooooooooooooooooooooooo. How are the uh, the animals, yeah the animals how are they?"
"Oh there doing ok it's really just Angel who's being a big meanie pants."
"Cool cool, uh-" something inside Rainbow caused her to say, "I'm horny."
she immediately went to cover her mouth with a hoof.
"Uh, I don't know why I said that." and then something made her say, "Let's fuck."
she covered her mouth again.
"Oh my!" said Fluttershy blushing. "I um, I don't know what to say to that."
"I SWEAR I DIDN'T SAY THAT ON PURPOSE!" Rainbow said, clearly flustered. "But, the more I think about it, for some reason, the more it becomes true."
"Well I, I. I kinda, feel the same way for some reason. I feel really, weird."
"Yeah it's kinda funky." Rainbow said, staring at the floor. She looked up again to see Fluttershy leaning closer towards her. Her cheeks were bright red.
She could feel the hotness of Fluttershy’s breath on her own face. She then found herself leaning in as well. Soon the faces were almost touching; and then they locked lips.
They stayed like that for a few seconds but it seemed like hours to them. They both pulled away at the same time. Both their faces were as hot as a chilli pepper that was left out in the sun.
"Wow. That was awesome." Rainbow Dash said.
"It was amazing." Fluttershy said.
The she grabbed Rainbow by the shoulders and pulled her in for another kiss. Rainbow layed down on the couch so she could look straight up at Fluttershy and she could look down at Rainbow. Fluttershy slowly slid her hoof down Rainbow's stomach until she got to the bottom where she started to rub. Rainbow Dash began to moan with pleasure like a pornstar who was trying to hard. After a very loud moan a wet spot formed underneath the hoof that was rubbing Rainbow. Fluttershy removed her hoof and began to rub herself against Rainbow Dash. This time the both of them moaned with pleasure. They kept rubbing and rubbing and rubbing until they finally climaxed together.
"UNHHHHHHHHOHHHHHHHH!" they both moaned. Fluttershy collapsed forwards onto Rainbow Dash and they both fell off the couch and lost consciousness.
When Rainbow opened her eyes all she saw was red smoke, swirling around in the black void. Then the smoke started to form a shape. The shape grew long flowing hair, legs, and horns made of smoke. The smoke was almost a solid figure before it exploded in one great big burst of red. What stood in the smoke's place was a pony. A very sexy but scary pony. Her fur was a red as blood and her long her was as black as the night. Her eyes were made of pure fire and she had two small horns poking out of her head.
I am lust. the pony said. I am here to replace all of your thoughts with lustful ones. All you with think about is lust. You will want to fuck everything.
Fluttershy appeared in front of Lust.
"What? Where am I?" she cried.
Tell her. Lust said.
"What?"
TELL HER HOW YOU FEEL AND HOW YOU'VE FELT.
"Rainbow I... I've had a crush on you since I met you. You were just so nice to me and, and you were the only one that enjoyed being around me back in school and loved you so much for it and I still do. Rainbow Dash, I love you."
In a flash Lust's hair grabbed Fluttershy and spread her legs towards Rainbow.
Doesn't that make you wanna fuck her? Doesn't make you wanna eat her pussy out so hard that she'll be cumming for a week?!
Rainbow's head was suddenly full of millions of lustful thoughts. Thoughts of orgies with all of her friends. Thoughts of fucking Princess Celestia with a strap on. Thoughts of scissoring with Fluttershy at a wedding. Thoughts of fucking Fluttershy every waking minute. She couldn't get Fluttershy out of her head and then...
Rainbow Dash woke up. She was laying on the floor next to Fluttershy. She felt lower down her stomach and realized that she was still wet. She looked over at Fluttershy who had also woken up.
"Did that really just happen?" Rainbow asked.
"I think so." Fluttershy replied.
"Then that means... Did you. Did you really mean what you said in there."
Fluttershy's entire face turned red.
"Well um I um you see um. Yes. Yes it was all true. It's the way I feel and have always felt. And since we, you know. I was thinking that maybe we could maybe go out to dinner?"
Rainbow Dash stared at Fluttershy for a moment.
"What? Are you serious? After that? I am never going to unsee what I fucking saw in there. I am getting the fuck outta here." Rainbow said before flying out the door. Leaving a disappointed Fluttershy behind.
