Chapters 2
Princess Luna looking dreary during the daytime was not uncommon, but during the nighttime it was rare to see even a hint of fatigue on her face. The Princess of the Night's odd nighttime habits were a particularly hot topic among both the night and day guards. The only thing she asked for more than coffee was books and scrolls. Guards and servants would bring these items to her room and then she would wordlessly wave them away with a silver-clad hoof. When she wasn't raising the moon or sleeping, she would while away her time just studying and struggling to stay awake.
The guards began to wonder exactly what she was researching so passionately. After compiling a list of all the books she asked for, they came to the conclusion that whatever it was had something to do with Pony Anatomy and Ancient History. Some guards even made a list of books they predicted she might ask for next, a list that turned out to be accurate. The list, however, was close to having everything crossed off of it. The guards wondered if Luna's mission was simply to read all these books and learn whatever she could or if she was looking for a bit of information in particular. If the latter was the case, it was evident she hadn't found what she was looking for.
As the time for the night to begin approached, Princess Celestia cracked open the door to her sister's room. As was normal for this past month, she saw her sister's image hunched over another heavy tome. Every time Celestia entered into her sister's quarters, she wished for good news; however, she knew that if Luna ever found anything noteworthy, she would rush out of her room while shouting it to the heavens.
"Luna," the white alicorn called out to her sister. Luna shook herself and looked up towards the door as Celestia entered all the way into her dark quarters.
"I beg your pardon, sister. I did not hear you enter in," Luna said, pushing away from her desk to properly greet her sister. Celestia raised a hoof, signifying that while the formality was appreciated she should simply forgo it tonight. "I see that it is nearly time for me to raise the moon. Do not fret, for I will complete my duties."
"I don't doubt that, little sister," Celestia said. "I've just come to suggest you take a break after you've raised the moon. It won't do anypony any good if we just run ourselves ragged over this."
"I know... it's just... what if we are running in the wrong direction, sister?" Luna asked. She used her magic to slam the books on her desks shut with a mighty thump. "We're not getting anywhere. I don't know about your end of the search concerning her parents, but perhaps I need to reevaluate my approaching to finding out exactly what she is."
"You're right, sister," Celestia said. She extended a wing and wrapped it around Luna, bringing her close until their sides were touching. "It is hard for me to believe that our efforts have turned up nothing. While I fear her parents might be purposefully eluding us, there is a clue that might help you in your search."
"Yes, I know," Luna said with a nod. "The transformation spell for my guards. I know I dug it out of a tome or scroll somewhere. Perhaps that could shed some light on what we're dealing with." Luna yawned involuntarily and quickly covered her mouth with her hoof.
"I think a little sleep would do you some good as well," Celestia said with a giggle. "After you raise the moon, of course."
"Sleeping during the night? Oh, what have my study habits done?" Luna said, feigning a complaint. "I do hope somepony will be out there enjoying the night in my stead."
When Pinkie Pie says she is going to throw a party, the proper response is to throw up your hooves and yell "Of course!" Big Macintosh and Applebloom offered up the Apple Family barn for the venue, and everything after that was history. For a Pinkie Pie Party, the event was a little subdued. It was more like a Pinkie Pie Get Together, which didn't quite have the same ring to it. As Rainbow Dash predicted, not many ponies showed up. Tonight it was just the usual suspects along with Sweetie Belle, Applebloom, Big Macintosh, and Roseluck.
"Ah still don't get it Rainbow Dash. Why is everypony so afraid of that little filly?" Applejack asked. Rainbow Dash shrugged as she watched Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie and the two Cutie Mark Crusaders play with Taboo on the dancefloor. The other ponies shared some idle conversation on the other side of the room near the refreshments.
"Maybe it's just something instinctual. They see the bat wings, the dragon eyes and just think 'danger', you know?" Rainbow Dash said. Both mares felt a bit odd talking about the subject. It wasn't because it was complicated or some big mystery, but because the answer was quite simple: Taboo is different.
"It's gonna be hard on her growin' up if we can't smooth things out now." Applejack leaned back on a bale of hay and pushed her hat up. "On top of havin' no parents, she's gonna have it rough."
"Yeah, I've been meaning to talk to you about that," Rainbow Dash said.
"'Bout what?" Applejack asked, watching as Pinkie Pie tossed Taboo up and down. Fluttershy looked like she was going to have a heart attack while Taboo giggled merrily.
"I think I'll be able to help Taboo if I knew a little more about what she'll have to go through," Rainbow Dash said, looking over at Applejack. The farmpony just nodded.
"Makes sense to me."
Rainbow Dash expected her to say more, but Applejack remained silent. She looked over at Rainbow Dash after the lull in the conversation got too long, wondering exactly why her friend was so quiet all of a sudden.
"Applejack... I'm asking you to help me out here," Rainbow Dash said a little more clearly. Applejack still didn't look like she understood at all. "You know... because your parents are..."
"Mah parents are what?" Applejack asked, raising her eyebrows. Now it was Rainbow Dash who was confused.
"Aren't your parents dead?" she finally asked straight out.
"You think mah parents are dead?!" Applejack shouted. The room went silent as the record scratched.
"So... I take it they aren't?"
Applejack just gave Rainbow Dash a death glare.
"How about I get us some cider?" Rainbow Dash dismissed herself from Applejack's company while Pinkie Pie put another record on. The casual atmosphere returned as everypony pushed Applejack's outburst out of their minds. Rainbow Dash returned with the drinks in short order.
"So if they aren't dead, why aren't they around?" Rainbow Dash asked as she handed a wooden flagon over to Applejack. The farm mare took a deep swig, downing half the drink in one go. She let out a satisfied sigh as the drink parted from her lips.
"Mah folks are an odd bunch. When they do stop by, it's usually very brief and very late at night," she said.
"I don't think I've ever met them during my time in Ponyville," Rainbow Dash said after a draught of her own drink. "Were they around more when you were younger?"
"Not really. The longest time they stayed at home was when Ma was pregnant with Applebloom. When Applebloom turned four, they were back to being gone all the time," Applejack explained. She took another gracious gulp from her cider, licking the foam from her upper lip once she was done. "Come to think of it, maybe I can sorta sympathize with Taboo. At least I know my parents."
"What keeps them away so often?" Rainbow Dash asked, curious about this new Apple Family dynamic she'd never known before. When Applejack let out a strained sigh, Rainbow Dash knew she was in for a ride.
"Well first off, y'all gotta understand that mah Pa is Granny Smith's son. He's an Apple through and through. Mah Ma she... she was grown on a different tree, you know what I mean?" Applejack asked. Rainbow Dash nodded, pretending she understood exactly what Applejack meant. Luckily, she went on to explain. "My Ma really likes wagon racing; she always has. Before she met my Pa, she used to go around Equestria with a whole team of beaus and 'tear it up' as she liked to say. She would drive and steer while the stallions pulled, but after a while they got tired of it. They were the ones doing all the runnin' 'n pullin' 'n travelin' about while Ma just sat back and gave orders.
"They finally up 'n ditched her before a big race 'round the Everfree Forest. Now mah Ma wasn't about to lose the race by default, so she went into Ponyville to find herself a new team. She looked all around Ponyville, but she didn't see anypony who fit the bill to pull her wagon. Her last stop in her attempt to find somepony was Sweet Apple Acres and that's when she found mah Pa.
"Now Pa was and still is a simple feller. He don't say much 'n just puts in an honest day's work, by mah Ma didn't see those things: she just saw how strong he looked. Mah Ma 'n mah Pa gave me different accounts of how their first meeting went, but Granny Smith saw the whole thing and I think her version is the most accurate.
"Now accordin' to Granny Smith, Pa got real nervous around mares and all the mares down in Ponyville just let him alone since he never said nothin' to 'em. When a strange, pretty mare comes up to him all of a sudden 'n starts askin' him to do her a favor, he was too spooked to do anythin' other than agree."
"What are your Mom and Dad's versions like?" Rainbow Dash asked. Applejack rolled her eyes, killing her drink before continuing.
"Ma just claims that Pa was entranced by her beauty on first sight while Pa claims he needed convincin'. The important thing as that Pa agreed to hitch himself to her wagon and pull her to victory. Now Pa had never pulled a wagon for speed before, but he'd had plenty of practice pulling carts full of apples all around the orchards. One wagon with just mah Ma in it was no trouble for him, so they ended up taking first place easily.
"Ma was real happy that she'd won, and she showed her thanks by givin' mah Pa an innocent peck on the cheek. Pa got so excited about it, he threw her on his back 'n carried her all the way back to the barn. 'Bout ten months later, Big Macintosh was born."
Rainbow Dash spat out a mouthful of cider.
"What?" she said after a couple of choking coughs. "That happened pretty quickly."
"Ah reckon so," Applejack said, already having accepted the reality of the situation. "Ma stuck around the farm 'n Ponyville when she was pregnant and when we were real little, but she never lost her desire to go racin'. She 'n Pa keep goin' around Equestria racin' while Granny Smith keeps an eye on us."
"Wow." Rainbow Dash couldn't think of anything else to say. She hadn't expected the story to hit such a chord with her. Applejack's mother had been in a similar situation that Rainbow Dash found herself in now. One day she was just cruising forward without worrying too much about anypony else, but all of a sudden she found herself charged with the care of somepony else. In the end, Applejack's mother still pursued her dreams and did what she loved, even though it took her away from her family.
Rainbow Dash's folks never had to make a decision like that. Their hobbies and jobs never took them away from home for extended periods of time, so they were always around. Aside from being foalsat some evenings, her parents were her primary caretakers, teachers, and sources of affection. It was easy for Rainbow Dash to love her parents, but Applejack's story left her with a burning question.
"Do ever wish they were around more?" she asked. Applejack didn't look like the question even phased her, which surprised Rainbow Dash.
"Of course I do," Applejack said. "But that's because they're mah parents 'n I love them. They weren't always around to be good parents, but they were always good parents when they were around. Mah Ma is part of the whole reason I ran away to Manehattan when I was a filly. I thought I took after her and I was meant to roam around 'n live apart from the farm.
"They came back a few days after I returned home mahself, and I told them all about how I got real homesick. I asked them if they ever got homesick, 'n now it's not surprise that they answered 'yes'." Applejack stopped herself, realizing she'd done more than just answer Rainbow Dash's question. "Sorry 'bout runnin' mah mouth. I guess I didn't need to explain so much."
"No, it's fine, really," Rainbow Dash said. "Everything I know about parenting comes from my own folks, so it's nice to get a different perspective. I'm not sure how I'll manage chasing my dream and taking care of Taboo. I mean... I've never even heard of a Wonderbolt having kids."
"Can't say I have neither," Applejack said. She put a hoof around Rainbow Dash and gave her a reassuring pat on the shoulder. "Ah ain't gonna discourage you from going after yer dream. If'n there's a way to make it all work, y'all will figure it out."
"'If there's a way'?"
Applejack poked Rainbow Dash in the chest with her free hoof.
"There is a way, and you will find it," Applejack said, reasserting her position. "Here's to hopin' the Wonderbolts don't hold Taboo against you like the Weather Team did." At the mention of her old job, Rainbow Dash furrowed her brow.
"They'll regret letting me go; I was the best they had!" Rainbow Dash said. She brought her drink to her mouth and chugged the rest of it down.
"That's what I don't get," Applejack said while her friend was busy drowning her sorrows. "Y'all could clear a sky in no time at all and they always picked you fer team leader during Winter Wrap Up. They really just let you go all because of Taboo?"
Rainbow Dash finished off her drink. She tipped it over and inspected the bottom for any drops that might remain.
"They really did. I just showed up and they told me I was fired; they didn't even explain themselves. I can't even guess what the Weather Chief has going through his head," Rainbow Dash said.
"Ah can't wrap my head around what anypony is thinkin' anymore," Applejack said. "Ah mean, Ponyville hasn't exactly been receptive of odd folks in the past, but they're usually just afraid. What's got them so hostile all of a sudden?"
Rainbow Dash stole a glance over to where Roseluck was talking with Big Macintosh. She thought back onto all the things she'd said and apologized for.
"Maybe they don't know either. One or two ponies didn't like Taboo, so everypony else just fell into line," Rainbow Dash said.
"I dunno if I buy that," Applejack said. "Ah can see few ponies bein' that way, but most of 'em? Ah think we need to ask around town 'n get some answers."
"Now wait a second there, Applejack." Rainbow Dash felt a little odd telling Applejack to slow down. Normally, it was the other way around. "I don't want anypony else getting flak over this. I'm afraid everypony will turn on you guys too if you stick your necks out too far."
Applejack rolled her eyes and gave Rainbow Dash a few more assertive pokes in the chest with a hoof. There was a good chance Rainbow Dash was about to get a good talking to from the Element of Honesty herself.
"We're yer friends Rainbow Dash, 'n we wanna help you out. Don't bother tryin' to stop us because you know we're gonna do it one way or another," Applejack reminded her, giving her one final poke before letting Rainbow Dash go. She turned about and headed over to the center of the room. "Alright everypony, that's enough for tonight. It's gettin' late 'n the little ones need to git to bed."
"Aww! But I ain't even tired!" Applebloom said in protest, but she allowed a yawn to escape despite her resolve. Sweetie Belle didn't even try to hide how tired she was. She just nodded her head with half-lidded eyes and wandered over to Rarity after saying a few parting words to Applebloom.
Rainbow Dash took a quickly fading Taboo from Pinkie Pie. The little foal curled up to her breast and closed her eyes. Rainbow Dash could watched her little chest rise and fall as she rocked her gently.
"Big Macintosh, be a gentlecolt and see everypony back to town, would you?"
"Eeyup," Big Macintosh replied as he always did while everypony began filing out of the barn. Rainbow Dash was the last one out, being careful not to wake Taboo as she walked. She was so focused on the little bundle in her hooves that she didn't notice the large figure coming up behind her from the side of the barn door. She turned her head slightly to acknowledge a movement next to her.
"Yipes!" Rainbow Dash exclaimed, but in a whisper as not to disturb Taboo. Instinctively, she cradled the foal away from the shadow beside her and hid the fact she was holding anything by spreading her wings. It took her a long time to realize the pony standing next to her wasn't a threat. She had to look beyond the dark armor, the leathery wings, and the reptilian eyes before she realized she was finally face to face with her night guard. "Oh, sorry... you startled me."
The guard didn't say anything. Rainbow Dash put her guard down and let herself relax. She checked to make sure that Taboo remained undisturbed before she took another look back at the guard. His eyes had switched from her to Taboo. The guard watched the foal while Rainbow Dash watched him. She wondered what he could be thinking.
"Well, we'd better get going." Rainbow Dash pulled Taboo closer as she took off into the night sky. She heard another set of wingbeats, indicating that the night guard was flying close by. The light of the moon went away as the guard positioned himself directly overhead. Rainbow Dash anticipated a quiet flight.
When they got over Ponyville, they noticed a group of pegasi flying a ways away. Rainbow Dash didn't think she needed to be wary of them, but she got felt a dark foreboding as they seemed to get closer. The group adjusted their path little by little until they were flying right towards Rainbow Dash. The approach did no go unnoticed by the guard, who flew down to put himself in between her and the possible threat.
"Maybe we should land for a bit," Rainbow Dash said, but not as a suggestion. She swooped down into the empty streets with the guard trailing right behind her. Once she was on the ground, she looked behind her to confirm exactly what she was afraid of: the pegasi were still following her. They landed on the street and started trotting after her, but Rainbow Dash just kept her head forward and ignored them. Even when they started calling after her, she didn't so much as perk up an ear to acknowledge them.
"Hey, we're talking to you!" a male pegasi shouted. He was joined by two more pegasi mares, but Rainbow Dash didn't recognize any of them. Rainbow Dash just picked up the pace a little, but even the guard's presence right behind her didn't give her any comfort. She could hear them getting closer, and closer.
"Don't ignore us!" one of the mares called. They were much too close for comfort now. The guard turned about and confronted the group, seeing as ignoring them wasn't doing enough to discourage them. The group halted before the guard. The four of them stood around in silence until the intruding group realize the guard wasn't going to say anything.
"You can stand down, buddy. We just wanna talk to her," the stallion said, but his tone of voice wasn't convincing. The guard just held his ground, still refusing to say anything. He could make it perfectly clear what he wanted the group to do without saying a word.
"Just ignore him, he can't do anything," one of the mares said. She started to move around him, but the guard spread his wings and blocked her. The action was enough to make the mare jump back a bit, but her curiosity made her lean back in to examine the wing spread before her. "Look at that! He's got wings like that little freak!" The other two pegasi took a look at his long, dark wings to confirm what their friend had told them. Devious gears started spinning in their heads.
"Oh, so this is the guy who sired that thing," the stallion said with a sneer. He pulled himself up to his full height and got up in the guard's face, but the guard still stood taller than him and his face remained impassive.
"I always thought that mare just slept with a manticore or something," one of the mares said.
"Or a dragon," the other added, giggling with her cohort.
"I gotta admit that mare is a nice piece of work," the stallion said. "Who knew she had such a disgusting fetish?" His last comment sent the mares with him into side-splitting laughter. The guard glanced over his shoulder momentarily to see what Rainbow Dash was doing. Much to his dismay, she was stopped at the end of the block. She wasn't taking advantage of the situation and heading home, but instead she watched in silence from a distance. He only looked away for a moment, but it didn't go unnoticed by the pegasi before him.
"What? You worried about that harlot and your freaky kid?" the stallion asked, switching to a more openly aggressive tone. "If you're so worried, why not just get out of town?"
"Yeah, nopony wants you here," a mare said. The jeers just kept coming. The guard couldn't tell where one pony's insult began and the other's threat was ending, but it didn't matter to him. He held his ground without a word in rebuke, but unless Rainbow Dash removed herself from the area it was a pointless endeavor.
"Excuse me, Mr. Guard?"
Everypony looked up to see a white unicorn coming down the lane towards them. She pranced right right up to the guard, shouldering past the pegasi in front of him.
"Thank goodness I found you, darling. Now, I need you to come with me." Rarity moved past the guard and gestured for him to follow her down the lane to where Rainbow Dash was. He didn't budge at first, not knowing what was going on.
"Hey, he's talkin to-" the first stallion tried to say, but Rarity spun around and leered directly at him.
"Do you mind? I'm trying to get some help here," Rarity said with the utmost indignation. "The nerve of some ponies. Don't interrupt me, okay?" The stallion wasn't sure what he had done to deserve the entirety of the unicorn's ire, which left him stammering for the right response. Seeing her opponent was disarmed, Rarity smiled and turned back to the guard. "This way, darling." She trotted down the street with the guard in tow, leaving the group of pegasi to wonder about what had just happened to them. Disheartened from the hunt and tired, they just shrugged it off and flew back into the night.
Rainbow Dash had never been so happy to see Rarity, but as the unicorn got closer she could tell the feeling wasn't mutual.
"What are you just standing there for? You should be back home in bed by now!" Rarity said through gritted teeth. It was all she could do to keep from yelling, a courtesy she extended only because she didn't want to wake Taboo.
"S-sorry, I just didn't want to leave him behind," Rainbow Dash said. She realized the flaw in her reasoning right away, and she braced herself to be scolded by Rarity for it.
"You're supposed to leave him behind! That's his job! Right?" Rarity turned back to the guard. The cross look on her face made him lean back as he nodded his head. Her expression suddenly softened. "And you were doing an excellent job, from what I saw." She resumed being cross as she turned back to Rainbow Dash.
"So, you don't have to apologize to me. Apologize to..." Rarity stopped mid-sentence to turn back to the guard. "Do you have a name?" she asked the guard. He just blinked down at her for a few seconds, but as her brow slowly began to furrow he decided he should give the mare what she wanted.
"Thunderhead." Rarity smiled up at him before turning on Rainbow Dash again.
"Apologize to Mr. Thunderhead," she demanded.
Rainbow Dash looked up at Thunderhead. He didn't look like he was enjoying this any more than Rainbow Dash, but he gave her a little nod, telling her to just say it and get it over with.
"Sorry for freezing up." Rainbow Dash scratched her head with a free hoof while Rarity smiled triumphantly.
"Very good. Now, let us get back to your home before anypony else shows up," Rarity said.
"Umm... 'us'?" Rainbow Dash inquired.
"Yes, I'm coming too, darling. Big Macintosh is making sure Sweetie Belle gets all the way home and I had Twilight cast that spell on me that lets ponies walk on clouds. Everything is taken care of," Rarity explained.
"You had Twilight cast that spell?" Rainbow Dash asked, getting a proud nod from Rarity. "So... you're coming in too?"
"Why of course," Rarity said. "When I saw that group of pegasi trailing after you, I got concerned. I wanted to be with you as long as you needed me."
"Well, I don't really need you; I'm okay. You should just go home." Rainbow Dash's words didn't do anything to convince Rarity to abandon her.
"We have much to discuss, darling. I promise I won't be long, alright?" Rarity didn't leave room for more argument from Rainbow Dash. She turned back to Thunderhead and extended her hooves. "Carry me."
Thunderhead just stared at Rarity, hoping she wasn't serious. He glanced over at Rainbow Dash, but her expression told him that he can avoid trouble by just doing what he's told.
"Alright Rarity, what did you want to talk about?" Rainbow Dash had put Taboo down to sleep in her a crib a while ago. Now she sat in her chair across from Rarity, who sat upon her couch. The unicorn was still busy taking in the room's decor. While she'd claimed it wouldn't take long, she'd spent the last ten minutes asking about what living in a cloud was like. She was disappointed to find out there were no large differences.
"Nothing in particular, really. It was more of an excuse to come in," Rarity admitted. Rainbow Dash scowled at her, but Rarity didn't seem to mind. "Since you were around for it, did you happen to catch what those ponies were heckling the guard over?"
Rainbow Dash averted her gaze. She'd heard all of it, but she didn't want to recount any of it. She felt like she owed Rarity for helping out tonight and in general, so she swallowed her doubt and told her everything she'd heard. Rarity remained silent through the whole tale, without a single emotion on her face. Her only reaction was a small sigh at the end of the tale.
"To be honest, I was afraid ponies might assume something like that," Rarity admitted. "I almost asked Twilight to write Celestia in order to replace the Lunar Guard with a Solar Guard. I don't think anypony outside of Canterlot is used to seeing them or even knows what they are exactly."
Rainbow Dash thought back on how Thunderhead just took everything those pegasi had said. He didn't utter one demand to them or resort to using force. Just like any good guard, he played the role of a shield very well.
"Well, we can't just switch them out now," Rainbow Dash said. "How do we stop those pegasi from spreading a rumor or something?"
"We can't," Rarity answered. Rainbow Dash hadn't expected such a frank answer, let alone a negative answer. "There are plenty of rumors running around, darling. One more won't hurt you if you don't let it, and it won't hurt Taboo at all. Well... it won't hurt her yet."
"What do you mean, 'not yet'?" Rainbow Dash asked.
"Well, when she gets older you won't be able to protect her from hearing those things. She'll have to deal with them on her own," Rarity reminded her. Rainbow Dash's heart sank when she realized her friend was right. Taboo's ignorance really was her bliss.
"W-what do I do? Those ponies would stop at nothing to tear her down if she could understand them! How do I-"
"Calm down," Rarity ordered in an even tone, exuding calmness herself. "You just have to show her that she shouldn't be bothered by the nasty things ponies say. It's called leading by example, darling."
"Yeah, I know what it is... but, do you think it'll work?"
For whatever reason, Rarity deadpanned and heaved a dramatic sigh.
"Rainbow Dash, my mother tends to burst into tears or get very angry when things go awry . I, admittedly, tend react strongly to smallest thing. Sweetie Belle is pretty much the same way, so believe me I'm almost certain it'll work. I mean, what is your mother like?" Rarity asked. "If I had to guess, I'd say she has a very strong self-image of herself and likes to let it show."
Rainbow Dash thought about it for a moment. She recalled, in particular, that her mother would always call whatever she was painting at the time "her biggest masterpiece". When she thought more about it, her father was always rushing ahead with his work and convinced each little find was a breakthrough. In Rainbow Dash's childhood household, it wasn't uncommon to see a parent with a dark cloud of disappointment hanging over their head. True achievement wasn't something easily attained, but it was always celebrated.
"That... sounds close enough," Rainbow Dash admitted.
"Of course it is. I'm an excellent judge of character!" Rarity claimed. "And remember, darling, when leading by example wears you down you're always welcome at Carousel Boutique... even if it isn't your favorite place."
"Thanks, Rarity." Rainbow Dash gave her friend an earnest smile, which was returned in full. "By the way, you're not losing any customers because I hang around so much, do you?"
"Not at all dear," Rarity said, her smile morphing into a look of confidence. "Most of my orders are from ponies in Canterlot anyway. In fact, business is looking very, very up. My line of Summer clothes is going to be in high demand!"
"Wow. Your stuff is that good?" Rainbow Dash asked. Rarity's eyes darted away for a moment, which prompted Rainbow Dash to be suspicious.
"Well... one of my closest competitors might have burned down in a Hearth's Warming Eve Tree accident, but it's not like I'm totally unopposed!" Rarity said. Rainbow Dash didn't claim to know exactly how the fashion market worked, burned down competitors or not, so she let the issue slide. "The extra workload took me by surprise, so I'm actually looking to hire on an extra set of hooves. I just need to find somepony who's okay with having Taboo around." Rarity's final comment brought Rainbow Dash's spirits down a bit, which Rarity caught on to. "But I'm sure whoever I find will be much better and far more worthy than the other ponies I've interviewed." Rainbow Dash cracked a smile at her friend's attempt to cheer her up.
"Thanks... for everything... again," she said.
"Think nothing of it, darling. It's getting late and I must be getting back... but before I go..." Rarity squirmed a bit in her seat. "Can I use your restroom?" Rainbow Dash pointed to the stairs. Rarity thanked her and trotted off.
Rainbow Dash was left alone to process a lot of information. She figured she had about a year before Taboo would be able to understand what ponies were saying about her, but then again it could be even less. She held on fast to her belief that everything would be alright. Part of her wanted Princess Celestia to locate Taboo's real parents, but at the same time she wanted Taboo to stick around. Maybe it was selfish, but Rainbow Dash wanted to prove she was capable of bringing her up right.
Failure was her greatest fear. If Taboo grew to fear, avoid, or even hate the world around her, Rainbow Dash would be a failure as a parent. She hadn't even cared about being any kind of parent a month ago. She was surprised, but she wondered why. She was just doing what was right, and now that meant being a good parent.
Any further thoughts were interrupted by a scream from Rarity upstairs. The shrill noise was immediately followed by Taboo crying from having been awoken, but Rainbow Dash flew off to the bathroom first. Her fear was that Twilight's spell had worn off sooner than Rarity anticipated.
When she arrived at the bathroom, she found Rarity still standing on cloud like a pegasus would; however, Rarity's mane was drenched. It didn't take long for Rainbow Dash to riddle out what had happened.
"You were leaning over the toilet when you flushed, weren't you?" she asked, already knowing the answer. Rarity just looked at her at wide eyed horror.
"Why did the water come down from the ceiling?" Rarity asked, looking up at the little cloud suspended over the toilet. "Why would that happen? What possible reason?"
"Because all my water is stored in a cloud in the top of my house and water likes to go down," Rainbow Dash explained.
"Then where does... you know... it all go?" Rarity questioned while she shook in the cold air.
"Septic Cloud." Rainbow Dash's explanation almost sounded made up to Rarity. "Cloud plumbing is a lot different that normal plumbing."
"I'll say!" Rarity shouted as she shivered. Rainbow Dash shook her head and threw her friend a towel.
"Dry yourself off and stop making such a racket. You woke up-" Rainbow Dash stopped herself. Taboo wasn't crying anymore. Scared out of her wits for what was probably the third time that night, she flew off to her bedroom.
She immediately went to Taboo's crib. Rainbow Dash couldn't remember feeling so relieved when she saw Taboo was still there. The little filly was standing up against the bars and looking out the open window. She forgot all about the window when Rainbow Dash appeared, quickly scampering over to stand against the bars and face her.
"Mommy!" she said with a pair of pleading hooves raised. Rainbow Dash complied, lifting Taboo out of the crib to cradle the filly close. She could have sworn she heard Taboo crying, but there was no trace of that fact on her face as she giggled in blissful innocence.
"Is everything okay?" Rarity asked as she stuck her head into the room. Rainbow Dash turned so Rarity could see that everything was just fine. As she turned, though, Taboo shifted in her foreleg. Rainbow Dash looked down to see Taboo's staring intently at the window, like she had been before.
"Everything seems okay," Rainbow Dash said as she walked over to the window. She stuck her head out and looked around, but she couldn't see anything that might capture the foal's attention. She shrugged it off as nothing, shut the window, and drew the blinds. "Do you need any help getting down?"
"I'll just ask Thunderhead. You have a good night and I'll see you tomorrow," Rarity said. The mares waved good bye to one another before Rarity slipped out of the room, closing the door behind her. Rainbow Dash turned back to the crib and started putting Taboo back in, but a whimper of protest stopped her.
"Nhn, Mommy..."
Rainbow Dash just stared down at Taboo, who gazed back up at her with puppy dog eyes. Taboo kept up her pitiful expression only briefly as sleep started to take her again, but that only made her look more pitiful. Rainbow Dash considered waiting until Taboo nodded off to place her in the crib, but all of a sudden the idea struck her as betrayal. Instead, she thought of a much better idea.
With Taboo in hoof, Rainbow Dash got into her own bed. She laid down, her hooves still wrapped around Taboo like a filly might hold a teddy bear. Taboo put her tiny hooves against Rainbow Dash's chest and snuggled in close. Rainbow Dash could feel the rise and fall of her tiny chest along with each warm exhale. She didn't dare twitch a single muscle in her legs, fearing she might disturb Taboo's peaceful sleep.
"Who thought a crib was a good idea?" she whispered to herself. She leaned down and gave Taboo a peck on her forhead and then watched as a tiny smile spread across her sleeping face. "I could get used to this."
3
Everypony in the lounge stopped what they were doing to throw on a salute as First Lieutenant Ship Shape stomped in wearing full, golden regalia. A neglected ping pong ball thocked against the unfinished floor while each Private stood as still as possible with one hoof on their forehead and their wings fully extended. The hoofful of nervous Privates cursed themselves for not hitting the hay right when Celestia raised the sun.
"At ease!" Lieutenant Shape barked, but his order was not taken to heart. The privates put their wings and hooves down, but they didn't dare feel at ease. The Lieutenant ran a hoof through his blonde mustache and gave his wings a brief flap while he eyed the Privates standing around. "Ah, Private Sprout!"
"Y-y-yes, sir?!" the pegasus in question stammered as he resumed saluting. Among the guards in Luna's charge, Sprout got a lot of flak for looking exactly like a Solar Guard when he wasn't under the influence of the Lunar Armor. He'd earned himself the nickname "pretty boy" for his striking appearance and foalish demeanor.
"I said at ease!" the Lieutenant shouted. Sprout brought his shaking hoof back to the floor while his wings clamped firmly to his sides. "Where's Private Thunderhead?"
"Thunderhead, sir?" Sprout asked, relieved that the Lieutenant's target was somepony else, even if it was his good friend. "He's in th-"
Sprout stopped when a loud flush cut through the tension in the air. The lounge's bathroom door swung open, and Thunderhead stepped out. The moment he saw Lieutenant Shape, his wings shot out and he put up his best salute. Without his armor on, his mane turned deep cyan and his coat became yellow. He didn't look too much like a night guard, but next to Sprout he fit in just fine.
"At ease!"
Thunderhead let his salute drop, but stayed more rigid than a two-by-four in dry air. He picked a far point on the wall and stared it down, not wanting to accidentally look into the Lieutenant's eyes. The mustachioed stallion had a penchant for perfect protocol, and he wasn't above punting a poor pony Private's posterior to periodically prove a point.
"I've got good news for you, Thunderhead: we're promoting you to Private First Class. Congratulations."
Thunderhead was sure he heard the Lieutenant wrong, and he was absolutely sure he was dreaming when the Lieutenant gave him a short salute. He wanted to pluck a feather to make absolutely certain, but he didn't dare break protocol in front of Lieutenant Ship Shape, dream version or not.
"Thank you very much, sir!" he said as if the Lieutenant just complimented him on how shiny his armor was.
"I've also got your first assignment for you too, straight from the Princess!" Lieutenant Shape explained, taking out a scroll from underneath his wing. Thunderhead wanted to argue that he already was doing an assignment for the Princess, the one he'd been doing for the past year, but he didn't dare say anything out of order. "Deliver this message to Ms. Rainbow Dash when you go on assignment tonight. You might be promoted, but this document is still more important than you are. Don't look at it and make sure this gets to her! Understood?"
"Yes, sir!" Thunderhead accepted the scroll and exchanged salutes with his superior one last time before the Lieutenant turned around and headed out the door. Everypony saluted one more time before he crossed the threshold, but once the door shut behind them there was a collective sigh by all the Privates.
"Thunderhead, that was incredible!" Sprout said with an amazed chuckle, throwing a hoof around Thunderhead. "Usually he comes in here and just yells at us, but the one time he doesn't he forks over a promotion to you! How did you do it?"
"Dunno," he grumbled, tucking the scroll under his wing. "That was enough excitement for me. I'm going to bed."
"No, please!" Sprout circled around his friend and stopped him before he could get to the bunks. "You've got to tell me how you get so lucky! First Princess Luna picks you for that special Ponyville job and now you're getting promoted? Do you secretly worship Discord?"
"No... I just... I dunno," Thunderhead said, trying to get around Sprout. The white stallion stood in the doorway and blocked it by spreading his hooves across the door frame.
"No, it isn't fair! You have it so easy!" Sprout complained with tears forming in his eyes. Thunderhead rolled his eyes and grunted.
"My job is far from easy, pretty boy," Thunderhead said, getting into Sprout's face. The ivory pegasus gulped, knowing that Thunderhead only uses that nickname when he's angry. "I thought it was going to be laid back on night one too, but I ended up fudging it because I wasn't paying attention. Some kid threw a rock through the window. I'm surprised that mare didn't chew me out over that."
"Somepony threw a rock at her window? Dude, what did this mare do exactly?" Sprout asked. Thunderhead averted his eyes because once again his friend was putting him in an awkward position. "You really can't tell me?"
"Orders right from Princess Luna's mouth. I'm not at liberty to speak freely about it," Thunderhead explained once again. "I may have said too much already."
“Hush-hush assignments straight from the top? How does one pony get so lucky?” Sprout said, but Thunderhead wasn’t going to entertain the conversation any further. He drew himself up to full height and used his guard voice.
“I outrank you now. Step aside.”
“B-but it doesn’t work like that!” Sprout said as he inched towards the verge of tears again. A stern glare from Thunderhead sent him scuttling out of the way with a yip. Thunderhead proceeded to his bunk. It was important he be bright eyed and bushy tailed tonight of all nights.
“Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!”
Rainbow Dash was already awake, although she wished she could sleep just a few minutes longer. The sun poured in through the window, beckoning her to get up and start the day. Of course there was another, more persuasive source of beckoning as well.
“Wake up, wake up, wake up!”
Rainbow Dash rolled onto her back and opened her eyes just a sliver to see the ball of energy bouncing up and down on her bed. At the zenith of each bounce, the filly beat her leathery wings furiously to achieve a brief hover. Each time she would inevitably fall back onto the mattress, and that would bring the process to the start of the next cycle.
“Wake up wake up wake up!”
As Rainbow Dash regained her awareness, she remembered what day it was. It was an anniversary of sorts, but not the anniversary of something ponies typically celebrate. She had decided, along with her friends (mainly Pinkie Pie), that there should be reason to celebrate this day, so they swept the true nature of the day under the rug and gave it a much more enticing title.
“Wakeupwakeupwakeup!”
Rainbow Dash silenced Taboo by bopping her on the head like one would do with an alarm clock, but she did it gently for Taboo was infinitely more precious than an alarm clock. Taboo stopped bouncing, but her wings kept flittering in excitement. She stared at Rainbow Dash with her golden eyes and waited for what she knew was coming.
“Happy birthday, squirt.”
Taboo switched to grinning from ear to ear, forcefully bringing the corners of her mouth up as if it could lift her spirits any higher. She hopped off the bed and scuttled out of the room on eager hooves. It isn’t every day you turn one year old, but that wasn’t what made Taboo unable to sleep most of the night. Word on the street was there were presents involved in growing older.
Rainbow Dash rolled out of bed and stretched out. She’d never planned a birthday party before, but this had been a year of quite a few firsts for her. The transition from Taboo being a defenseless foal to a spunky filly happened a bit fast, even for Rainbow Dash’s tastes. Taboo was obviously at least one or two months older than a year old, but that was a needless technicality. After working out all of her kinks with great success, Rainbow Dash headed on downstairs to find Taboo waiting patiently for her while sitting astride Tank. Rainbow Dash had hoped the two would get along well, but the filly treated the poor tortoise more like an inanimate object than a pet.
“Whaddya want for breakfast?” Rainbow Dash asked as she trotted past the pair towards her kitchen.
“I’m not hungry,” Taboo said, holding her position on top of Tank. “We can go now.” Rainbow Dash stopped short to squint at the filly. Taboo just stared back, smiling hopefully at her mother.
“Taboo, skipping breakfast won’t make the party happen sooner. Now what do you want to eat?” Rainbow Dash asked once again. Taboo pouted as her mother’s logic went over her head. She thought for sure her plan was going to work, but its failure left a pit in her stomach. Then again, maybe she was just hungry.
“Oatmeal!”
“Just hang tight, alright kiddo?”
Taboo nodded while Rainbow Dash proceeded into the kitchen, but her patience was far from that of a sage. She idly rocked back and forth on top of Tank, imagining all the possibilities the day held. Mommy said there would be a party down in town for her, but she wondered who would come. She hoped Pumpkin and Pound would be there and all her Aunties too. She had a lot of Aunties, more than she could count.
*Knock knock*
Taboo turned and faced the door. Knocking meant somepony had come to visit. She wanted to know who, and although she waited Mommy never went to answer the door. Mommy always answered the door.
*Knock knock*
Whoever was knocking tried again, but still Mommy didn’t come. Overcome by curiosity and a bit of boredom, Taboo decided she should take it upon herself to answer the knocking. She got down from Tank and trotted over, but before opening the door up she went through her mental checklist of all the things Mommy told her not to do.
No yelling, no biting, no sticking out your tongue, no wandering too close to the edge of the cloud, no tail pulling, no mane pulling, no wing pulling, no food throwing, no toy throwing, no hitting, no spitting, no wiping your nose on your hoof, no crawling out the window, no chasing Auntie Rarity’s kitty, don’t roll in mud, don’t roll in puddles, don’t try to open the top cupboard, don’t eat cookies before dinner, don’t eat cookies before lunch, don’t eat cookies before breakfast, don’t eat cookies before bed, don’t eat cookies in bed, don’t eat cookies on the couch, don’t eat cookies on Tank, don’t eat cookies on Mommy and never, ever, ever, ever, ever leave mommy’s side in town.
Certain that there was no rule against opening the front door, Taboo jumped up and caught the doorknob between her hooves. She turned it, letting the door swing open a little. She dropped to the floor and opened the door the rest of the way with her nose. She smiled triumphantly at whoever had knocked, but her smile vanished when she found she was looking up at a complete stranger.
The stranger, however, looked oddly familiar. The closer she looked, the more the stranger looked like Mommy, but Mommy was blue and not purple. Her eyes and mane looked just like Mommy’s. Taboo, caught between not knowing the pony and how much she looked like Mommy, just gawked up at the pegasus mare. A warm smile curled across the mare’s face, making her look even more like Mommy. Taboo was filled with wonder, curious as to the identity of the pony before her.
“Well, hello there!” a strange stallion suddenly stuck his face much too close to Taboo’s. Instinct took over and she scampered backwards while she shrieked at the top of her lungs as if some sort of hideous beast had appeared. She retreated until she hit something solid, which happened to be Rainbow Dash’s front hooves. Taboo took refuge underneath her, but peeked out to keep a wary eye on the pair of strangers.
Rainbow Dash just stared at her parents while they stared back, neither party able to formulate the appropriate way to carry on for a few seconds. Order was restored by Palette giving her spouse a good smack upside the head.
“What was that for?” Birdie said, but his wife paid him no heed. She marched inside and approached her grandchild cowering beneath her daughter. Palette got down on her level, but Taboo still recoiled from her. The filly balled up as tight as she could, but she didn’t dare leave the security of Rainbow Dash’s hooves. Mommy wouldn’t let anything bad happen.
“Did he scare you baby? I’m so sorry.” Palette’s tone was just as sweet as honey, and for little Taboo it was just as enticing. The filly stayed balled up on the floor, but she inched slightly closer to Palette. Her curiosity took hold again, giving her the blind courage to rise to her hooves until the two were almost nose to nose. “You don’t remember who I am, do you?”
Taboo shook her head.
“Well, I’m your mommy’s mommy. I’m your grandma,” Palette explained as she poked Taboo on the tip of her nose with her own nose. Taboo’s face lit up as she made the connection. If this was Mommy’s mommy, that made her like super-mommy!
“And I’m your grandpa!” Birdie said from directly behind the unsuspecting filly. Taboo did not react favorably to being startled by the scary stallion a second time, and now he was invading her safe haven under Mommy’s hooves. She zipped out as fast as her little hooves would take her and took new refuge behind her Grandma’s hooves. She backed her haunches against Grandma’s hind hooves and kept her eyes locked on the strange stallion. She didn’t understand why Mommy wasn’t scaring him off already.
“Knock it off, Dad. You’re scaring her!” Rainbow Dash said, finally confronting her father. Birdie looked at his wife for assistance, but she had none to offer. “For Celestia’s sake, I thought you said he was good with foals!”
“No, I said he was good with you,” Palette reminded her. “But he’s a teacher, so frightening young ponies is his job, Dashie.” Palette leaned down and smiled at Taboo who was still cowering beneath her. “I promise he’s completely harmless.” Palette continued to gently urge Taboo out of hiding while Rainbow Dash shot a dirty look at her father.
“W-w-what?”
“Apologize,” Rainbow Dash ordered, pointing to the filly approaching with her ears pinned back. He slowly got down to her level, but allowed Taboo to be the one to approach.
Taboo analyzed the stallion before her. He had fuzzy hair on his face, which made him look funny, but he was big and Taboo didn’t know who he was. He had come with Grandma and Mommy let him in the house, so he must be friendly. Mommy never let any unfriendly ponies into the house.
“I’m sorry for scaring you, Taboo.” Taboo jumped back a little when the odd stallion spoke, but she relaxed at his apology. He had also called her by name. Even if he’s a little scary, maybe he’s friendly. “Me and grandma just came by to say ‘Happy Birthday’ and give you this.”
Taboo’s eyes grew wide when Birdie revealed a large box wrapped in shiny, blue wrapping paper. Two big, red ribbons were tied around it and a big bow accented the top. With her target acquired, Taboo leapt into action.
She jumped up and grabbed the box’s ribbon with her mouth. She had to tilt her head all the way back to keep it from dragging on the floor, so she couldn’t see where she was going when she started to scamper away with her prize. Unfortunately, Rainbow Dash already knew what the filly was going to do once she saw a present and was much faster than the young, young pony. She merely had to land in front of Taboo to make the filly bump into her and drop the stolen present.
“Exactly where do you think you’re going?” Rainbow Dash asked, lifting the present up and out of Taboo’s reach. Taboo plopped down onto her rump and crossed her forelegs. Even though ponies kept giving her presents, Mommy wouldn’t let her have them. Each time she would say the same thing. “Wait until the party, okay?”
“Okay,” Taboo said, but refused to meet her mother’s gaze. Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes and gave Taboo a peck on the forehead.
“Breakfast is in the kitchen. We’ll head into town after you eat.” Rainbow Dash didn’t expect a response as Taboo got up and stamped her little hooves all the way to the kitchen. The display was a lot cuter than it was threatening. Rainbow Dash just chuckled and shook her head.
“My, my… I can’t believe it’s already been a year,” Palette said. “Time sure flies when you get old.”
“Speaking of time flying,” Rainbow Dash said, turning to her parents. “I didn’t think you guys would get here so early.”
“That’s because your father insisted we leave as soon as possible,” Palette explained. “And by ‘as soon as possible’ I mean he suddenly woke me up and insisted we get a move on without breakfast. Needless to say, I’m famished. Mind if I root around your kitchen?”
“Feel free,” Rainbow Dash said with a gracious gesture towards her kitchen. Palette smiled and took her leave, which left Rainbow Dash and her father alone. The older stallion tittered and shook his head.
“I tell ya, Rainy. The letters just aren’t enough. You and Taboo really need to come to Cloudsdale more often,” he said, approaching his daughter to put a wing around her. “I can’t speak for everypony, but I know two ponies who would never turn down a visit from their cute daughter and granddaughter.”
“Sorry, but it’s like I’ve told you: things are tough,” Rainbow Dash explained. She didn’t like being coddled by her dad all that much, but for now she allowed herself to lean into him.
“I’m sure you know, but it’s not going to get any easier, Rainy,” he reminded her. “Especially if you don’t let yourself take a break every once and a while. From your letters, it sounds like your friends would gladly bend over backwards to help you out, so take a night off if it ever gets to be too much. Doesn’t matter what you do, really. You could go flying, read a book, sleep, go on a date...”
“Ah yes, that again,” Rainbow Dash said with a groan at her father’s mention of dating.
“Rainy, it took a lot of effort on my part to keep your mother from questioning that guard outside if he had any feelings for you. Promise me you’ll put time aside for yourself and I’ll do my best to keep your mother off that subject all day.”
The offer was tempting for Rainbow Dash, more than her father realized, but ever since Taboo showed up Rainbow Dash never left the filly’s side. When Rainbow Dash worked, she took Taboo along for the ride. When Rainbow Dash practiced, Taboo would play where she could keep a constant eye on her. They even bathed together. Her friends offered to foalsit more often than Rainbow Dash cared for, and while she appreciated the sentiment she couldn’t bring herself to part from Taboo.
“I said I’d take care of Taboo, so that’s what I’m doing,” Rainbow Dash said. There wasn’t a pony in the world who could convince her she’d done wrong by Taboo and there were no good arguments to make a claim against her. Taboo was fed, sheltered, and loved. Anything more would be excess.
“I know, and you’re doing a great job, Rainy. Just remember to take care of yourself.”
“Please, I can do both just fine!” Rainbow Dash gave a toss of her mane, surprising her father with her sudden boasting. She’d gotten bigger, older, and stronger since she’d left home, but at heart she hadn’t changed much.
“Can you? Have you eaten breakfast yet?” her father asked.
“Hey, you haven’t either!” Rainbow Dash replied with an added jab of her hoof into his chest.
“Well then, we’d better eat before we turn into hypocrites.”
“Wait!” Taboo stopped right in the doorway with all four hooves spread further apart than normal. Rainbow Dash and her parents stared back at the filly, wondering what had suddenly stopped her. Rainbow Dash had just finished asking her if she was ready to go, so of course now would be the time Taboo would choose to hold up their departure.
Without a single word more, Taboo turned herself around and scampered back into the house. Rainbow Dash figured this could only mean one thing and followed her. Sure enough, Taboo went up the stairs and into the bathroom. Rainbow Dash tried to follow her inside, but Taboo insisted that she could do what needed to be done all by herself. Rainbow Dash stared at the closed bathroom door for a full five minutes before Taboo finally opened the door and stepped out. From the look on the filly’s face, one would think she just accomplished something very profound. For wasting five minutes, Rainbow Dash really hoped she had.
After making sure Taboo hadn’t made a mess in the bathroom and checking to see if her bum was clean, the birthday girl was loaded up onto her mother’s back and the entire family was off to Ponyville. The ultimate destination was Carousel Boutique, where Rarity had insisted the party take place. Nopony had any objections, aside from the fact that only so many ponies could be in there at one time. Rarity then reminded everypony that, unlike most Ponyville functions, this party would not be well attended. For their intents and purposes, everypony who mattered would be there.
Upon entering Carousel Boutique, Rainbow Dash was surprised that none of those ponies were around. Instead, it was just Rarity and some stallion who looked only vaguely familiar. Both ponies turned around when the door’s bell chimed.
“Oh, Rainbow Dash! Don’t worry, we were just finishing up,” Rarity said, turning back to her guest. “So you’ll be in touch?”
“Of course! When I get any news, I’ll send you a letter right away. Now, if I could just have those drafts.” Rarity’s guest spoke mostly through his nose, indicating that he was probably among the Canterlot elite. Rainbow Dash found it odd that he was an earth pony and not a unicorn because most everypony who was anypony in Canterlot was a unicorn. She could only remember meeting one other high-class earth pony, but upon noticing the guest’s cutie mark she realized she was looking at that exact stallion.
“Of course, Hoity. My assistant should be back any second now,” Rarity said, but her smile became a little more strained and her voice leaked out just the tiniest bit of annoyance. She’d sent that stallion after those drafts thirty-two seconds ago. There was no reason for him to be so slow.
Right on cue, a blue stallion came tripping down the stairs with several odds and ends levitated above his head, one of which was a manila envelope overflowing with designs drawn with a carbon pencil. He moved quickly, fully aware of the fact that his employer wanted said envelope in her hooves ten seconds and counting ago.
“Oh, thank you Pierce,” Rarity said in a gracious enough tone and unassuming smile as she took the envelope from him. He smiled back, but deep down he knew there would be repercussions later. There were no dire consequences while other ponies were around. “Here you go and I do hope to see you soon, Hoity Toity.”
“Yes, very soon. Ta-ta!” Hoity Toity waved, waltzed past Rainbow Dash and company, and right to the door. Before opening it and stepping through, he turned around. He put his shades down and looked right at Taboo. Taboo stared right back at him, unsure of what to make of this strange looking… stranger. Hoity Toity pushed his glasses up and pointed a hoof at Rainbow Dash. “Ma’am, is this your child?”
“Yes, she’s mine,” Rainbow Dash said, with a bit of an edge creeping into her voice. In the past, that question never lead to anything good. She wouldn’t put it beyond a Canterlot elite to get uppity about Taboo’s appearance and she definitely didn’t put it above a fashionista to get uppity about somepony’s looks. Her wings flared slightly, ready for whatever sort of criticism the posh pony planned on putting out.
“Ah, yes! She must be Taboo! Rarity has told me quite a bit about you,” Hoity Toity said directly to the filly in question. “It’s your birthday today, yes? Well, happy birthday to you then!”
Rainbow just gawked at Hoity Toity open mouthed while he reached out to give Taboo a friendly pat on the head, which she gratefully accepted. Taboo beamed and saw Hoity Toity out the door with an enthusiastic wave. The earth pony waved back before letting the door close behind him. The bell jingled.
“My, he seemed awful nice,” Rainbow Dash’s father said.
“I should’ve asked him who does his mane,” her mother added.
“Well, there’s no need to stand around the door everypony. Come in, come in. Everypony should be coming by shortly,” Rarity said, urging Rainbow Dash and the rest of her family the rest of the way inside. “And now you just have to introduce me to your parents, Rainbow Dash.” Rarity approached her friend and her parents, snapping Rainbow Dash out of her own thoughts. There were some questions she wanted answered, but she could always ask Rarity later.
Once introductions were through, ponies started arriving. First to arrive was Pinkie Pie, bringing along with her just about anything and everything you could ever need for a party. She also brought Pound and Pumpkin cake with her, which was of far greater importance to Taboo. The Apples came next, Applebloom bringing Sweetie Belle, Big Macintosh bringing Roseluck, and Applejack bringing just herself. Fluttershy was the last to arrive, laden with plus one gift and a wide look in her eyes.
“Hey Fluttershy. What’s up?” Rainbow Dash asked, relieving her friend of her physical burden as she walked in the door. The yellow pegasus shook her head and cleared her throat.
“Twilight asked me to apologize for being unable to be here today. She gave me Taboo’s gift to give to you to give to Taboo.” Fluttershy pointed at what looked to Rainbow Dash to be the most hastily wrapped book she’d ever seen. Granted, she hadn’t seen too many wrapped books in her household, but she did know a hastily wrapped gift when she saw one.
“What’s this about Twilight being unable to come?” Rainbow Dash started flying over towards the table of gifts, with Fluttershy trailing behind her on the ground.
“W-well, she got a letter from her brother and Princess Cadence this morning.”
“That isn’t much of a reason…”
“Princess Cadence has apparentely… uhm… given birth.”
Rainbow Dash whipped around so quickly the end of her tail whapped her on the nose.
“Cadence is pregnant?”
“N-no, she just got done being pregnant,” Fluttershy pointed out. Rainbow Dash tapped her noggin a few times with her hooves to recalibrate for a moment.
“Right… I mean, why are we just finding out about this now?”
“Twilight said something about things being busy for them, what with them taking charge of The Crystal Empire.” Fluttershy scrunched up her nose a bit, remembering how Twilight had not accepted that as a viable excuse to not update her on the impending arrival of her nephew/niece.
“Wow. I guess that’s as good as an excuse as any,” Rainbow Dash said. “Do you know if it was a boy or a girl?” Much to Rainbow Dash’s surprise, Fluttershy produced a piece of parchment from under her wing. She scanned it with her eyes briefly before answering the question.
“Alicorn male, named Nimbus.”
“Alicorn?” Fluttershy nodded a confirmation. “That seems… important.”
“Yeah… Twilight was pretty irate about the whole thing. She dropped this right before she teleported away,” Fluttershy explained, handing over the letter in question to Rainbow Dash. She read it over once herself, but she was still having trouble coming to grips with the contents.
“Cadence and Shining Armor need to stop having important events in their lives while they’re busy keeping stability in Equestria.”
“I don’t think they have much control over it.”
Birthday parties are awesome. Taboo wished every party could be her birthday party. Everything was centered around her, her, her, her. Ponies sang to her, they gave her gifts, they let her play games with her friends, but best of all was Mommy let her have two pieces of cake. Today was the best day ever and only getting better.
Taboo was growing tired of having to stick around the Boutique. She liked it there, but it was such a nice day outside. Pumpkin and Pound had agreed with her. Now that all the cake eating and present opening was done, maybe Mommy would let her go outside to play. Hopeful, she went and asked.
Rainbow Dash had conflicting feelings about letting her go. On the one hoof, this is Taboo’s party and technically she shouldn’t be leaving. On top of that, Rainbow Dash couldn’t leave the party herself just to watch Taboo, which she felt compelled to do. On the other hoof though, Taboo would be with Pound and Pumpkin, the only two party goers who would probably lament her absence from the immediate area. The Boutique was close enough to the edge of town and far enough from the Everfree Forest that she shouldn’t have to worry about Taboo getting into trouble.
Feeling particularly generous today, Rainbow Dash decided it couldn’t do any harm to let Taboo play outside for a while. There really weren’t any more festivities to be had aside from having the older ponies fuss over her. For extra measure, she enlisted the two Cutie Mark Crusaders to keep an eye on them.
“Sure, no problem Rainbow Dash!” Applebloom said. “They’re out behind the boutique then?”
“No, they’re over by-” Rainbow Dash turned and pointed to the door, but saw it was slightly ajar and the three little ponies she had instructed to stay by it were missing. “… Yeah, they’re out back. They sure are energetic today.”
“Aww, shucks Rainbow Dash. They ain’t no match fer the Cutie Mark Crusaders, even if we are down by one!” Applebloom said, reminding Rainbow Dash that the Crusaders were unusually active for fillies their age, or any age really.
“I’m sure, but remind me why Scootaloo couldn’t be here again?”
“She doesn’t want to miss a day of flight practice,” Sweetie Belle explained again. “We told her one day off wouldn’t kill her, but she said something about losing half of yesterday’s practice and that spiraled into a rant about… something. I’ve learned to tune her out nowadays; she gets pretty passionate.”
“Passionate about what?” Rainbow Dash asked. The Cutie Mark Crusaders Minus One just shrugged. “Well, as long as she’s okay. Better get out there before… well, before anything really.” The Cutie Mark Crusaders took their leave and trotted out the door, leaving Rainbow Dash to puzzle over what Scootaloo had been up to for the past year. She used to have trouble getting rid of her, but now it was rare to even see her around.
“Something on your mind, darling?”
Rainbow Dash was startled by Rarity’s sudden appearance, which in turn clued Rarity into just how deep in thought Rainbow Dash had been. It wasn’t easy to sneak up on the cyan pegasus.
“Please tell me you’re not that worked up about Taboo going outside…”
“No, I was just thinking about Scootaloo,” Rainbow Dash admitted. “She’s been… scarce.” She was surprised to look over at Rarity and see a smug smile across her face.
“I guess you haven’t been about town recently, so you haven’t heard the news about her.”
“News?”
“Yes. She’s become quite the little wing-nut. She’s been getting flying lessons and advice from every pegasus in Ponyville… well, every pegasus except you and Fluttershy,” Rarity explained.
“But I’m a great flier! Why wouldn’t she come to me?” Rainbow Dash asked. The reasons why she would avoid Fluttershy’s advice were clear as day to her, but she couldn’t fathom why the filly wouldn’t come to the self-declared and undisputed greatest flier in all of Equestria for flying advice.
“Do you have time to take out to teach her to fly?” Rarity asked, but only rhetorically. “You spend all day with Taboo at home, your cloud home that only ponies who can fly can get to. When you are down in town you’re too busy running deliveries for Roseluck to stop and talk to anypony. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but I think Scootaloo might be respecting your time constraints.”
“I… hadn’t thought of it like that.” It almost seemed like a given that Rainbow Dash wouldn’t see Scootaloo. It wasn’t like she saw Applebloom or Sweetie Belle all that often either, and when she did it was only at special functions like this. Scootaloo always had some reason not to show up, so that explained why Rainbow Dash hadn’t spoken to the filly in a while.
“That’s fine, I mean you have bigger things to worry about than what Scootaloo does with her days,” Rarity said, her point as valid as ever. “Any other unimportant worries you want me to sweep away?” she asked with more than just a hint of poking fun at her friend.
“Actually, yeah,” Rainbow Dash said, giving her friend a mock, stern gaze. “Why did Hoity Toity know about Taboo?” Rarity’s first response was to heave a very, dramatic sigh.
“Of course… the pony standing at the top of the fashion industry comes to see me about having some shows in Canterlot this winter, but all you want to know is why he knows about your kid.”
“Yeah,” Rainbow Dash said. She didn’t catch on to the fact that Rarity was just joking.
“We work together and we talk about non-work things sometimes. That’s all there is to that, really. He knows about Roseluck and Big Macintosh going steady for four or five months now, if that’s of any importance to you,” Rarity said.
“Not really, but I’m glad those two came together to this party at least,” Rainbow Dash admitted. Rarity didn’t actually want to get away from the topic of Hoity Toity until she could detail her certain, future success to Rainbow Dash, but the train was already leaving the station. “Having a special somepony will keep my mom from pestering him.”
“Oh, your mom is one of those, is she?” Rarity said, knowing full well the kind of romantic pressure mothers are capable of impressing upon their daughters if they so desire to pour on the pressure. “Should I hide Pierce in the cupboard?”
Rainbow Dash had forgotten about Pierce. She glanced behind her, and sure enough her mother was talking very animatedly to the unicorn stallion. Pierce, inversely, was obviously searching for some sort of out, preferably one that didn’t involve proposing marriage to the daughter of the mare before him. He didn’t have anything against Rainbow Dash (a point he’d reiterated to Palette several times), but he hadn’t woken up today expecting to tie the knot.
“Well, better him than me,” Rainbow Dash said, happy to throw Pierce under the bus for the day.
“He’ll pull through; he’s a fighter,” Rarity assured her friend. “In your mother’s defense-”
“Here we go…”
“I am just saying,” Rarity spoke up in a bit sterner tone. “It wouldn’t hurt you to find somepony. We’re always around if you need a night to yourself. At least entertain the idea of getting married and having foals now and then, not that you haven’t. You have, haven’t you?”
“Well, not getting married,” Rainbow Dash replied. Rarity giggled a little.
“But you’ve thought about having foals?” she asked. Rainbow Dash did not respond, not verbally at least. She blushed a bit and threw her gaze skyward, and that’s when it dawned on Rarity. “You… want to have a foal?”
“Look, just hear me out!”
“Oh, I’m listening alright.” Rarity levitated her couch over and took a seat. She patted the spot next to her, prompting Rainbow Dash to heave a sigh and sit on down.
“I can’t help but think about what it would like to have a kid, you know? Don’t get me wrong, I love, love, love Taboo and from time to time I forget she didn’t actually pop out of my stomach. She’s my daughter and that should be enough, but I my mind can’t help but wonder. Having her around makes me wonder what it would be like to… you know… Taboo just… she just…”
“Woke up your maternal instincts?”
“Yeah, that.” Rainbow Dash did a double-take as she realized Fluttershy had appeared right next to her at some point in the conversation.
“Oh, I’m sorry, am I interrupting?” Fluttershy asked in her normal, meek manner.
“No, no, you’re fine. Right on the money too, I think,” Rainbow Dash said.
“Oh, I know. I can relate,” she said with a sage nod. Both Rarity and Rainbow Dash cocked their heads at the shy pony. “Oh, don’t get me wrong. All the critters I take care of or have taken care of are like my children, but sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be a real mama.”
“I guess that’s… the same,” Rainbow Dash said, shooting a glance at Rarity to search for some agreement. Rarity shrugged and shook her head, unsure if Fluttershy’s statement was cute or creepy. Perhaps it was a little bit of both.
“At any rate,” Rarity started before the conversation could wander deeper into the rabbit hole. “You know the old rhyme: ‘First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes the foal in the foal carriage’. I don’t want you two going and having foals out of wedlock.”
“Okay…”
“… Fluttershy, please don’t answer like that; it worries me,” Rarity said, turning back to Rainbow Dash. “And I don’t think it’s odd to have thoughts like that in your situation. I know you’ll be responsible for Taboo’s sake, so I’m sure everything will work itself out for the best.”
“Yeah, I know that,” Rainbow Dash said. Her tone came off as a little ungracious, which earned her a stern look from Rarity. “Sorry, what I meant is that I know you’re right.”
“That’s better.” Rarity gave her friend a few goods pats on the back and then sent her off to get herself a piece of cake. Rainbow Dash didn’t protest against it very earnestly, trotting off to get another slice after just a few prods. Rarity and Fluttershy were left around.
“So… you want to be a mother?”
“Well… uh.” Fluttershy rarely kicked herself for opening her mouth, but whenever she opened her mouth she usually ended up kicking herself over it. Today’s confession was far from the exception.
“See? Taboo is cheating!”
“Am not!”
“Are too!”
“Am not!”
“Are too!”
“Stop it you two!” Pumpkin shouted, or squeaked rather, stopping the argument between the other young ponies.
“Yeh, I’m sure Taboo isn’t cheating, Pound,” Applebloom added. “She’s just good at hide-and-seek… really good.”
“I’ll say.” Sweetie Belle had been just as skeptical as Applebloom when Pound complained that Taboo always won at hide-and-seek. They were ready to believe she was the best among the three, but fifteen rounds of the game later and nopony had managed to sniff the filly out even once. They always had to call olly-olly-oxenfree after searching bore not fruit. Each time, Taboo would always emerge with a grin from ear to ear.
Sweetie Belle and Applebloom weren’t about to say it out loud, but they were also starting to suspect foul play was ahoof.
“That’s right, so it’s your turn to count!” Pumpkin reminded her brother. She had ousted him from his hiding spot in the bushes right off the bat, so the rules of the game dictated he was the next seeker. This did not please him, but he did see it as an opportunity.
“Fine! Everypony go hide.” Pound put his head down on the stump they had designated as the counting spot and covered his eyes with his hooves. He started counting, but once he was sure nopony was looking he lifted one of his hooves slightly.
Out of the tiny little window, he watched Taboo trot off towards her hiding spot. She moved as fast as she could towards the rocky riverbank a few yards out from the back of the boutique. Pound couldn’t see any obvious hiding spots in the area, but Taboo just kept going for it. Right before he finished up counting, he saw her duck behind a large stone. He had her now.
“Ready or not, here I come!” Pound shouted, darting off towards where he knew Taboo would be hiding. The tables had turned and the cheater would be revealed. He arrived on the riverbank and rounded the rock Taboo had gone behind. Now was the moment he would finally beat her at hide-and-seek. He had to cheat a little to get this far, but cheating to stop a cheater wasn’t cheating. With a bound and a few flaps of his wings, he bounced behind the rock.
There were only more rocks.
Pound was dumbfounded. He wondered if she’d moved somewhere else in the brief moment he’d looked away when he stopped counting, but there was nowhere for her to even go. He scanned the surroundings thoroughly, but there wasn’t anywhere for the filly to hide. At least, there shouldn’t be anywhere for her to hide.
Pound lifted up some of the filly sized rocks in the area and checked underneath them. He tried to lift the big rock too, to see if she’d gotten under there somehow. He then dug his hooves through the smaller rocks, in case she had burrowed her way beneath the stony shore.
The only other viable place he saw to hide in was the river. He trotted over to the edge and peered over into the shallows. The water wasn’t exactly deep enough to hide in, so he waded in to his knees and took another look. He was surprised to see two blue eyes looking back up at him from under the water. Before he could riddle out what was happening, Pinkie Pie burst from the water and picked him up.
“You found me!” she said, but Pound wasn’t even aware that she was playing. He was, in fact, entirely sure she was not playing. “Let’s go find everypony else!” At any rate, she was playing now and taking Pound along for the ride. The two left the shore to look elsewhere before Pound could scour it any longer.
With Pinkie’s help, he found Applebloom, Pumpkin, and then Sweetie Belle in no time at all. Taboo, however, was still nowhere to be found. The others gave up quickly, realizing they were no closer to discovering where she had gone than they were in any previous round. Pinkie Pie, a self-proclaimed Queen of Hide-and-Seek, refused to give up. She only lasted five minutes longer than the rest of the gang.
“Oh, she is good,” Pinkie said, returning to the stump in defeat.
“I’m telling you, she’s cheating! She has to be!” Pound insisted once more.
“No she isn’t!” Pumpkin replied, turning on her brother. Pound still refused to yield.
“Yes she is!”
“No she isn’t!”
“Yes she is, and I’ll prove it!” Pound got up on the stump and pointed towards where he had seen Taboo go hide when he cheated. “When we call olly-olly-oxenfree, she’s going to come from over there! I know she is!” The others exchanged uncertain glances. They didn’t understand why he wouldn’t just go over there and find her if he knew where she was. The group called the all clear, and waited to see if he was right. All eyes were on the river bank. The air was tense and charged. Nopony moved. The world stood still.
“Whatcha doing?”
Everypony spun around to see Taboo standing behind them, watching them watch for her.
“But you went… I saw you… the riverbank! How did you get over here?” Pound demanded an explanation.
“What do you mean you saw her?” Pumpkin asked before Taboo had to explain herself. “Did you cheat, Pound?”
“Only because she was cheating!”
“So you were cheating!” Now all eyes fell on Pound. He couldn’t believe it. He wasn’t the cheater; Taboo was! They should be angry at her.
“Y’all shouldn’t cheat, Pound.”
“Yeah, you have to play fair no matter what.”
“B-but I-” Pound did not get a chance to defend himself.
“No buts!” Pumpkin shouted. “Since you cheated, you have to be the seeker again!” Pound couldn’t do anything beyond stand completely still and fume as the others ran off. He turned back to the stump to see Taboo was still around. He stared her down, but she kept her innocent, sweet smile up and blinked her puppy dog eyes at him. She trotted right up to him until they were almost touching noses.
Pound wasn’t sure what was going on, but he remained rooted to where he was. Taboo looked left. Taboo looked right. She looked left again, just for good measure. She turned back to Pound and looked him dead in the eye with that same, unassuming smile.
“Phptttttt!” Taboo stuck out her tongue and blew a raspberry right in his face. When she was done, she scampered off to wherever it is she always hides. Pound just planted his face into the stump and slowly counted. He just couldn’t win.
“Goodnight!”
It was an odd thing for Taboo to say right after walking in the door, especially considering that the sun wasn’t quite down yet. Rainbow Dash suspected the filly was planning something, mostly because Taboo never willingly went to bed. Even if she nodded off only seconds after getting into bed, getting her there was never an easy task.
“Hold on a second!” Rainbow Dash stopped her, setting down the bundle of gifts next to the door. “What’s the hurry? Don’t you at least want supper first?”
Taboo paused. She looked upstairs, then back to Rainbow Dash, then to the kitchen, then out the window, then back to Rainbow Dash, then back to the kitchen, then right back to Rainbow Dash… and then-
“Yes or no.”
“Okay.” The little filly took to her hooves and cantered off to the kitchen, deciding she was hungry. Rainbow Dash decided to overlook the odd behavior for the moment and focused on feeding her kid. She didn’t have anything special planned for dinner, so she threw together a salad in order to accommodate Taboo’s desire to go to bed.
“Tired?” Rainbow Dash asked through a mouthful of greens. Taboo was also chewing away at some leaves (cut up for easier consumption), but her manners were a little better for some reason. She just shook her head. She swallowed before answering verbally.
“I mean yes.”
Rainbow Dash could puzzle over the conflicting signals, but if Taboo was willingly going to hit the hay she wasn’t about to stop her, especially after a busy day like today.
“Alright, just brush your teeth before you go to bed, okay?”
Taboo nodded, pushing herself away from the table. Rainbow Dash hadn’t even noticed how quickly the filly had shoveled down her meal. Maybe she was tired, but judging by how quickly she was heading up the stairs that seemed unlikely.
Halfway up, Taboo stopped. She spun around and ran right back to the table, right to where Rainbow Dash was seated. She pulled herself onto the chair and then into Rainbow Dash’s lap, where she threw her front hooves around her.
“I love you, mommy! Good night!”
Rainbow Dash wrapped one hoof around Taboo while she ran the other through her mane. Sometimes, she wished Taboo really was her flesh and blood. She wished she was just like any other filly and they could live happily as a normal family. She wished the darker side of how they came to be together didn’t exist. In moments like these, though, she stops wishing. She just gives thanks.
“I love you too. Sleep tight and happy birthday.” Rainbow Dash leaned down and gave Taboo a kiss on the forehead. After giving each other one last squeeze, Rainbow Dash tapped Taboo on the rear and sent her off to bed with a giggle. “And brush your teeth!” she added before Taboo disappeared into the bedroom.
Rainbow Dash finished up eating by herself. There was a time this would not be unusual, but Rainbow Dash suddenly felt how she was currently all alone in the room. Before Taboo, she was anything but lonely. Now she knew how empty her house felt without somepony else around. It was quiet, boring even.
It wasn’t a bad thing to feel alone in her house, but it was certainly something she could not have realized without knowing how lively it could be. Between just the two of them, Taboo and Rainbow Dash had turned the house into a home. She got along fine before with just Tank, but she liked the way things had become. Besides, when it got quiet she could just curl up with a book.
Unless there was somepony knocking at her door, which now for some reason there was. Rainbow Dash got up from the table and trotted over to the door, wondering who in the wide-wide world of Equestria was coming to visit after the sun had gone down. Curious, if not a little perturbed, she opened the door.
“Evening. I have a letter from the Princess for you.” Thunderhead hooved over the letter only moments after Rainbow Dash had opened the door. Seeing as she hadn’t spoken to the guard since the incident a little less than a year ago, she was surprised to see him. Thunderhead aside, this was a moment Rainbow Dash had been expecting. She took a deep breath, and took the letter from Thunderhead. He threw her a salute while she unfurled it.
Dear Rainbow Dash,
I find it hard to believe that is has been a year since you first found Taboo, since I first learned of her existence. Although it pains me to say it, we cannot make heads or tails of what she is or who her parents are. If she is going to continue living in Equestria, both of these issues must be resolved, even if just temporarily.
Firstly, she is henceforth a pegasus under Equestrian law. Although her wings are not feathered like other pegasi, having wings at all is enough to earn her that qualification. Like any other pegasus, she must be registered with the local Air Traffic Office when she is able to fly. The Cloudsdale Flight Security Committee must also have up-to-date health information on her before she flies between any two Equestrian cities. She can also get a Weather Manipulation License from either your local Weather Patrol or from Cloudsdale Central Weather Supply once she is old enough and if she wants to.
The reason I am telling you this is because I want you to remember that even if Taboo is a special case it is no longer the case when it comes to being a pegasus or flight laws. Her adherence to these laws is mandatory, just like any other pegasus. I could have her registered under “other” for species, as if she were a griffon citizen or a minotaur, but I don’t think she is different enough to merit that measure. She is a pony, so she her official documentation will reflect this.
Secondly, effective as of midnight tonight, you are no longer Taboo’s caretaker. Starting tomorrow, you are her Legal Guardian. I know I said you were her Guardian a year ago, but it was more honorific than official. You were not immediately made her Guardian when you came to me a year ago only because that would have complicated putting Taboo back with her real parents. Now that she is an Equestrian citizen, she needs a Guardian. The reasoning for that, from a legal standpoint, should be obvious.
Before I was trusting you to keep her healthy, fed, and happy, but actually being her Legal Guardian is a bit different. You are now legally responsible for the aforementioned items (not “happiness” technically, but I’m still holding you to that) along with some other issues. You will be responsible for taking her to see a doctor regularly, for making sure she attends school when she is old enough, and until she is an adult you can be legally held responsible for certain actions should she choose to take them. I realize it’s probably not as big of a change as I’m making it sound, but I implore you to take care of these things now that you’re tasked with them.
I also feel obligated to inform you that we will no longer be actively searching for Taboo’s real parents. Her information will be available to anypony who is searching for a lost child, but that’s about it. The trail leading to her parent’s whereabouts is just as cold as the day we picked it up, so it pains me to say I do not have much hope in discovering them. You should know, that if they do make themselves known, you have legal grounds to keep Taboo in your care.
On a different note, Luna has not given up on figuring out why Taboo is the way she is. She isn’t quite as consumed with the pursuit as she once was, but the trail she’s following is very cold as well. She’s trying her best, though. She even requested books from archives outside of Canterlot. Whatever she may discover, I will update you.
I believe that is all I need to address. I’ve sent this letter though your guard and not Twilight because it is for you and only you. This letter is your official notification as to your status as Taboo’s Legal Guardian. Don’t lose it.
I wish you much happiness, my loyal subject, and I wish Taboo just the same. Most ponies sign off with “good luck and do your best”, but I’m actually against those sentiments. I know you’ll do your best without me having to tell you and I wouldn’t allow your happiness to be determined merely by luck. Keep doing what you’re doing, Rainbow Dash. The future is bright if you do.
Sincerely,
Princess Celestia
“Well… that’s that I guess,” Rainbow Dash whispered to herself.
“What’s what?”
She had forgotten Thunderhead was still standing around and watching her. The letter had been pretty long, so she was impressed he could stand so still and silent for so long. Then again, he was a royal guard.
“Taboo is my kid now… legally.”
“Oh.” Rainbow Dash waited for him to say something more, but he didn’t. The pair just stared at one another, not realizing what the other was thinking.
“…’Oh’? That’s all you’ve got?” Rainbow Dash asked. Thunderhead shrugged. “Taboo officially becomes my child and I officially become a mother, and all you’ve got is ‘Oh’?”
“… Congratulations?” Thunderhead watched as Rainbow Dash’s face contorted into a suppressed grin. She didn’t hold back very long, allowing herself to laugh after a second or two. Thunderhead scowled a little, unhappy that his earnest reply was being handled so delicately.
“A bit underwhelming, but I’ll take it,” she said, after her giggles subsided. “Thanks.”
“You’re welcome.”
“And thanks for the letter,” she added.
“Just doing my job.”
“Well… is that part of your job?” Rainbow Dash asked, pointing to something she’d spotted on his back. Thunderhead lifted his wings and turned a bit so she couldn’t see, but it was already too late. She stepped out the door and rounded him, bringing the newspaper-wrapped parcel into full view. It wouldn’t have been so suspicious if it weren’t for the big tag hanging off of it clearly marked “Taboo”.
“No… it isn’t…”
“No need to be secretive about it. It’s fine with me if you wanted to get her something for her birthday. How were you planning on giving to her without telling me anyhow?” Rainbow Dash asked. Thunderhead’s eyes darted away and he tensed up a bit. Rainbow Dash smelled something fishy. “How did you know it was her birthday anyhow?”
Thunderhead had to answer, and he had to answer honestly. He really shouldn’t have kept it a secret in the first place. It was really only a secret because he never talked to Rainbow Dash and apparently Taboo never told her about it.
“Taboo told me about it a week back,” he admitted. Rainbow Dash raised an eyebrow. She took to her wings and hovered over the stallion while she interrogated him.
“Last week? When last week?”
“Before she went to sleep.”
“How?”
“I was near the window and she called out to me,” he explained. The whole story didn’t exactly sit well with Rainbow Dash. She didn’t think anything indecent was brewing, but something inside her kept her on edge.
“Does this happen often?” she asked.
“I… guess-”
“How long has this been going on?”
“Well…” Thunderhead wasn’t exactly sure where to start. He decided it would be best if he started from the very beginning. “That night those pegasi tried to harass you on the way home, I was under the window when I heard her crying. I flew up to see if anything was wrong. You weren’t around, so I ended up trying to calm her down myself.” Once he’d finished his explanation, he saw a light go on in Rainbow Dash’s head.
“That was you?”
“Yeah,” he said. “Ever since then, I see her looking out the window time to time. When I do I just fly on up for a little bit. I’m sorry if I was going behind your back.”
The gears in Rainbow Dash’s head were still spinning a bit. She was not, could not be, upset. She was okay with this new information. It surprised her, but that was about it. She trusted Thunderhead, so she was okay with him talking to Taboo.
“Well… you shouldn’t be keeping her up,” Rainbow Dash replied, feeling the need to reprimand him on some point. Thunderhead chuckled a bit in response, which earned him a little glare.
“Sorry, that was just a very mother-y thing to say.”
Despite Rainbow Dash’s high capacity to take compliments, this one threw her. He called her motherly, in so many words. She’d been running around with Taboo thinking how she was her mother, but nopony had ever explicitly said to her that she acted like one.
“Y-yeah, so what if it is?” Rainbow Dash shot back, even though she wasn’t sure why she was retaliating. One thing was for sure though: saying thanks would have been far too embarrassing. “Are you gonna come in and give Taboo her present or not?”
“I… well, if you’d let me,” Thunderhead said, hesitating at the breach in ritual.
“Yes, I’m letting you,” she said with a huff. “I’m not letting you deliver it through her window. Do it like a normal pony.”
“Right.”
Rainbow Dash led Thunderhead inside, who trotted behind her at an infuriatingly slow pace. He insisted on taking it easy and observing the “scenery” of the house. Rainbow Dash flew up the stairs and hovered in the air impatiently while he trotted up the stairs two at a time. She was glad he could at least do that quickly. They finally reached the bedroom door, which Rainbow Dash pushed open quietly. She did not enter in.
Taboo was in her bed, another Apple Family Artifact that they had generously loaned. She wasn’t sleeping, but she was instead staring out the window with her hooves on the sill. Rainbow Dash had a very good guess as to who she was scanning the cloud below for. If she had any doubts about Thunderhead’s story earlier, seeing Taboo like this was all the confirmation she needed. Instead of leading Thunderhead in, she closed the door just as silently as she’d opened it.
“What’s wrong?”
“Do it like you usually do it,” Rainbow Dash told him, trotting past and back down the stairs. Thunderhead, although confused, went ahead and followed her.
“What happened to doing it like a normal pony?” he asked.
“I wouldn’t want to ruin this thing you two have going,” she said. He couldn’t tell if she was serious, joking, or both. He guessed both.
“You’re the boss.”
“Darn right I am.” Rainbow Dash opened up the front door and gestured for him to go out. Thunderhead chuckled again, shaking his head as he went on out the door. This Rainbow Dash was certainly different from the one he had to defend all those nights ago. “Thank you.”
The door was closed by the time Thunderhead turned around. Yes, this mare was certainly different indeed.
4
Spitfire put another stamp of approval on another Wonderbolt Academy application. She hadn’t been particularly impressed with anything she’d seen so far, but that was typical. If she wanted to find Wonderbolt material she would have to take in the occasional slacker. A little Wonderbolts discipline could work (for lack of better word) wonders on a pony. She accepted that not every batch of recruits can be full of whiz kids.
“Hey, Spits.”
Spitfire stopped sifting through her pile and glanced up at the pony sitting across her desk. There was absolutely no reason for the rookie of the year to be hanging around her office, but once again he was camped out with a newspaper sprawled out over half her desk and a quill in his mouth.
“Fish or false?”
“Red Herring.” Spitfire listened while Soarin counted quietly to himself. Once he was done, he scratched in the answer with his quill and moved onto the next part of his crossword. It was actually Spitfire’s crossword, seeing as it was her newspaper. If possession was nine-tenths of the law, Soarin had little regard for nine-tenths of the law.
“Said or wheel part.”
“Spoke.” Spitfire stamped another application for approval and slid it aside. She took a moment to scowl up at Soarin as he counted the boxes again. “Can’t you do that at home, or at least in the barracks or the mess hall?”
“It’s the weekend; nopony is around,” Soarin said in defense. Spitfire just scowled deeper. She thought that maybe she should relocate herself instead of waiting for easy-going Soarin to make a move. “To throw the blank into the corner.”
“Spoon. Soarin, I have work to do. Could you clear out?” Spitfire asked, not trying to hide her annoyance with her intruder.
“But work is boring.”
“It isn’t your work!” Spitfire shouted at him. She took a deep breath before continuing. “I don’t need it to be interesting. I just want to get it done, alright?”
“I’ll be quiet,” Soarin said, scritching another answer into the puzzle. Spitfire kept staring at him, waiting. Despite what Soarin said, she was prepared. “Let It Be or blank .”
“Nevermind!” Spitfire returned to what she was doing while Soarin scribbled in her answer. She wasn’t going to get him to go away, just like any other day. There wasn’t anything special about it, just like there wasn’t anything special about any of this year’s applicants. She picked up the next form and looked it over.
The name was one she’d heard before: Rainbow Dash. The young mare had won Cloudsdale’s Young Flier competition with her spectacular signature move and even organized and impressive hurricane in Ponyville. Spitfire hadn’t realized she’d reached the right age to officially try out for the Wonderbolts, a point which she would be talking with the scouters about later.
She sipped her coffee and took a look at the other pieces of the application. Her list of achievements was impressive even on paper. She even came recommended by the Princesses, which was uncommon for ponies who weren’t already military. Everything about her application was stellar and impressive, but there was one part that was odd: she had checked the box to stay off-base while attending Wonderbolt Academy.
Recruits hardly ever requested to stay off-base, but when they did Spitfire usually forced them to stay anyway. The reasons were never sufficient, not for Spitfire. Wondering why Rainbow Dash would make such an odd request, she scanned the boxes to see what reason she had checked off. Spitfire had to put her coffee down, noticing the “Other” box was checked. Even more curious than before, Spitfire read over the note Rainbow Dash had personally scrawled in.
“… WHAT?! ”
Soarin toppled over backwards in his seat as the room shook from the sheer volume of Spitfire’s surprise. He hadn’t the foggiest idea of what had her so rattled, but it had to be significant. Spitfire doesn’t lose her cool; it just doesn’t happen.
“She has a kid?!” Spitfire read the line over and over again. Never before had something like this happened. Recruits didn’t have kids, they were usually too young. If they did have kids, a spouse was normally able to look after them. Rainbow Dash’s note stated that she was a single parent and didn’t want to be away from her child for too long. Spitfire wasn’t sure what to do.
“Who has a kid?” Soarin asked, getting back into his chair. Spitfire couldn’t answer him right away, for once. She examined the address Rainbow Dash had requested to stay at, finding that it was only as far as Cloudsdale. The distance wasn’t unreasonable, but she would be expected to hussle to morning drills.
“Do you remember the mare who won the Young Flier’s competition? She saved our lives when that other pony fell.” Spitfire said, looking up at Soarin. “Rainbow Dash, who led the weather team in Ponyville for the hurricane. The one who made the Sonic Rainboom at the Royal Wedding? I think you danced with her.”
“… I don’t remember her,” Soarin said, earning a smack upside the head from Spitfire.
“She saved your pie at the Grand Galloping Gala!”
“I remember the pie!” Soarin received another whap to the back of the noggin. “Stop that!”
“She has a kid! A kid !” Spitfire slid the application towards Soarin and made him look at it. He squinted his eyes and scanned it up and down.
“What am I looking at?”
Spitfire decided she wasn’t going to get anywhere talking to Soarin about this. There wasn’t much of anywhere she could get talking to anypony about this. How Rainbow Dash ended up with a kid aside, it was up to Spitfire to decide whether or not she should allow Rainbow Dash to stay off-base. As hard-nosed as Spitfire considered herself, the thought of separating a young mother from her foal made her gut twinge a little. She couldn’t believe it, but she knew she was going to bend on this occasion.
She pulled the application back towards her and grabbed a quill. She signed her approval of Rainbow Dash’s living situation and then stamped the document for approval.
“Whoa, you’re letting her stay off-base?” Soarin asked because by some magic he had figured out what was going on. “Why the special treatment?”
“She has a kid,” Spitfire said in her own defense. “That’s the only reason. If she says her kid is young and needs her around, I don’t wanna be the one to keep them apart.”
“It’s just a week, Spits,” Soarin reminded her, but Spitfire still wouldn’t have it. A week is a long time for a child. Spitfire was surprised Soarin didn’t understand this, seeing as he was pretty much a child in a stallion’s body.
“It’s just one pony. Nopony is gonna get up in a tizzy about it if she has a good reason, and a kid is a good reason.” Spitfire reclined in her chair and crossed her forelegs. “But if the kid isn’t real, I’ll kick her out of the academy so fast it’ll remove her flight suit.”
“That’s the Spitfire I know,” Soarin said with that easy smile of his. He picked his crossword back up and started back to work on it. “I hope it’s a cute kid.”
“She’s not going to bring it here.” Spitfire put Rainbow Dash’s application in with the other ones she had approved. “I won’t have any of that. This is a training camp, not a nursery.” Spitfire meant it, but on the inside she harbored some amount of curiosity. She wanted to know how Rainbow Dash expected to be a single mother and a Wonderbolt. She wondered what kind of parent she was. Most of all, Spitfire wondered if Rainbow Dash’s concerns for her child would interfere with her potential as an addition to the Wonderbolts. The least of her concerns was whether or not the kid was cute, even if it did exist among her concerns.
“Do you know a five letter word that means ‘in the loop’?”
“Privy.” Spitfire went back to the work in front of her. With any luck, she would get some answers in the week of Wonderbolt Academy. Nothing about Rainbow Dash’s situation seemed to allude to any trouble. She didn’t forecast a storm next week.
There was more than just a twinge of guilt in Rainbow Dash over how quickly she had dropped Taboo off at her parent’s and then flown off. She barely had enough time to remind the little rascal she would be home before she went to bed and give her a peck on the forehead when her parents blinked. Rainbow Dash was a mare with her priorities right in line, however, so she couldn’t allow herself to be late to her first day of Wonderbolts practice.
That excuse lost power when Rainbow Dash arrived a full fifteen minutes early. This was still cutting it close in Rainbow Dash’s mind, but the fact of the matter was what had been done was done. She had to forget about Taboo for the time being and focus on bringing her A-game to Wonderbolt Academy. Looking around at her classmates, she realized that might be difficult.
Out of the six ponies standing with their luggage on the runway, four of them she recognized from Ponyville. Of those four, she had worked alongside three of them managing the weather and hadn’t talked to any of them since the day she was booted out. Based on what she heard from her friends, their sentiment was strongly against her. The odd pony out was Snowflake, who Rainbow Dash was unsure had any sort of opinion about anything.
Being the bigger mare (figuratively), Rainbow Dash sucked it an and took her place in the line-up, even though it put her right next to Cloudchaser, an avid gossip and lay about on the weather team. She and her twin sister had made some pretty scathing remarks in the past, none of them she was going to be thinking about fondly anytime soon. Rainbow Dash made sure to orient herself so she wasn’t facing the annoying mare as a measure to prevent any sort of conversation. She was sure between this and Cloudchaser’s certain bias against her, this would be enough to keep things cooled off.
“Hey RD.”
Apparently she was wrong.
Rainbow Dash turned her head to look at Cloudchaser, who was already looking at her. Nothing in her expression confirmed any aggression. In an odd turn of events, Rainbow Dash found herself greeted as if nothing was wrong, not that anything was wrong. At any rate, the situation confused her.
“Uh, hey Cloudchaser… long time no see?”
“No kidding.”
Their conversation was so abysmally mundane Rainbow Dash wondered if she flew so fast she entered a different dimension where Taboo no longer existed. This seemed unlikely, so Rainbow Dash decided to test the waters a little more.
“I didn’t know you were interested in being a Wonderbolt,” she said, keeping her tone conversational while surpassing the urge to chew Cloudchaser out over a few past transgressions.
“Yeah, well, I thought it might be a nice way to meet celebrities.” It was a very Cloudchaser answer. The mare glanced down at Rainbow Dash’s feet where she noticed a lack of a few certain somethings. “You packed pretty light.”
“Oh, I’m staying at my folks place while I’m at the Academy so I can take care of Taboo,” Rainbow Dash admitted freely. Now that she’d brought up Taboo, she waited intently for Cloudchaser’s reaction. Her next words would determine where she stood.
“Lucky.”
“No, no, no, no, no!” Rainbow Dash wasn’t having this. “The jig is up, Cloudchaser. Why’re you playing ignorant?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” A bead of sweat rolled down Cloudchaser’s temple as her eyes darted elsewhere for a second. “I’m not pretending there’s no bad blood between us!”
“Yeah, you said some pretty nasty things about my kid and me.” Rainbow Dash watched as Cloudchaser’s composure started falling apart, but the mare didn’t give up. Dash couldn’t say her determination wasn’t admirable.
“I didn’t spread rumors that you let your kid suck your blood.” The determination was there, but the ability to play the game wasn’t. “And that one about you being in a bloodletting cult? Totally not me!”
“What’s with the blood fixation?”
“I associate blood with bad things, okay?!” Cloudchaser only had time to blink before she realized what she’d said. “Dangit!”
“Ah-ha! Got you!” Rainbow Dash wasn’t one hundred percent sure what she caught Cloudchaser doing, but she caught her nonetheless! It was a victory for Rainbow Dash, or so she considered until she realized she’d gotten nowhere. “So do you want to bury the hatchet or what?”
“I thought you’d never ask!” Cloudchaser switched to sunshine and smiles so quickly Rainbow Dash felt left behind.
“You actually think I’d forgive you that easily?”
“Dangit, why not?” This mare could flip and flop between emotions so fast she put Rarity to shame. What’s more, Cloudchaser’s didn’t make any sense. Rainbow Dash knew she needed to get to the bottom of this.
“Why the sudden change of heart?” Rainbow Dash asked, feeling like an interviewer for having to grill Cloudchaser with all these questions.
“I realized the error of my ways! I was wrong to persecute an innocent foal on the basis o-”
“Nice try.”
“Aww, come on!” Cloudchaser’s reactions were akin to somepony who kept losing at the roulette. “What do you want me to say?”
“I want you to tell the truth!” Rainbow Dash told her, plain and simple.
“I want you to introduce me to the pony who guards your house,” Cloudchaser responded without a hint of inflection or emotion. “He is a golden can of hot body and I want him.” She narrowed her eyes at some distant point.
Rainbow Dash just stood there with her mouth hanging open for a few seconds. She had never really talked much with Cloudchaser before and when they had it was mostly weather stuff. Now, she was starting to care very little what this mare thought of her.
“Are… are you drooling?”
Cloudchaser wiped some spittle from the corner of her mouth. “I like a stallion in uniform. It’s my… thing.”
“Uh… huh…”
“I think it may stem from when I was a filly. I accidentally came across a soldier and a mare in an alleyway. They were-”
“ThatsgreatCloudchaserpleasestoptalkingforever. ” Rainbow Dash never knew she was capable of speaking so fast, but she thanked Celestia that she could. She calmed down and composed herself. “I didn’t need that much truth.”
“Introduce me to that soldiering stud muffin, and I promise I will never bother you ever again,” Cloudchaser said, as if what she had was some kind of bargaining tool. On the other hoof, Rainbow Dash wasn’t above throwing Hastae under the train if it meant shutting Cloudchaser up. It wasn’t like he was the greatest guard in the world, but he didn’t deserve to be given over to the wolf for imminent devouring.
“When you have an earnest apology ready, come talk to me.” Rainbow Dash wasn’t about to compromise for one pony. If she gained favor among Ponyville’s citizens by just doling out favors and doing what they wanted, she hadn’t made any real progress. Not everypony could have an earnest turn of heart like Roseluck, but it would be nice if it happened every once and a while.
“Fine, but just hear me out for a second.” For once, Cloudchaser sounded serious. This was enough for Rainbow Dash to abandon her judgments and listen. “There are a few ponies here who aren’t exactly head over hooves with you right now. I hear Thunderlane is pretty steamed with you, and I also hear you probably shouldn’t ask him about it. I’m pretty sure you know what’s eating Raindrops, so I won’t go there.”
Rainbow Dash cringed a little. That wasn’t a good memory.
“I hope you get what I’m saying, Rainbow Dash,” Cloudchaser said, continuing on. “I know you like to hang onto grudges, but you may want to take a moment to drop the animosity. I’m not saying we’d make this miserable for you out of spite, but if battle lines get drawn you’re going to be outnumbered. Try and make friendly.”
“Well, I’m glad to see you did have a complete change of heart,” Rainbow Dash said, turning away from the offending mare. Cloudchaser did likewise.
“Plenty of fish in the sea, mother dearest.” The fur was threatening to fly now. “You know my offer, take it or leave it.”
“And you know my offer.”
Before more could be said, Spitfire arrived and called everypony to attention. Dash turned her focus towards training, which was hard considering all the distractions; however, this is Rainbow Dash’s dream. No setback is too big a setback today.
If the first half of the day’s training was a pony, Rainbow Dash would be wanted for murder. Like the athlete she was, she set aside all her problems and emotions and just flew like the wind. Actually, the wind doesn’t even go that fast. Rainbow Dash flew circles around the circles she flew around the other candidates.
Rainbow Dash had also, against all odds, made a friend today. Not only was Lightning Dust not a total jerkwad, but she was almost as fast and almost as awesome as Rainbow Dash. Almost . It was comforting to know that there was going to be at least one pony at the Academy who would have her back. She hadn’t mentioned Taboo yet, but she hoped to have a nice conversation about it that would forge a friendship even Twilight would want to write to Princess Celestia about.
The only problem was Lightning Dust had suddenly disappeared when lunchtime came around. Feeling confused and even a bit slighted, Rainbow Dash took a seat in the mess hall by herself. For the mare to skip out on lunch when she had a long afternoon of training ahead of her was not wise at all. Plus, it made Rainbow Dash look like a loner.
She grumbled and took a bite of her tomato sandwich. She wished there was time to fly to her parent’s for lunch, but that would be pushing it. For the time being, she decided to just put up with being on her own.
That was when Thunderlane slammed his tray down across from her and took a seat. Astonished, Rainbow Dash just stared at him while he glared back. He didn’t really look excited to be there at the moment, but there he was. Rainbow Dash continued to eat and stare at him, but Thunderlane didn’t even spare his food a single look.
“Whoa, it’s getting intense over here,” Cloudchaser said while passing by with her tray. She moved to pass over this table, but Thunderlane stuck out a wing and stopped her.
“Sit down,” he ordered.
Cloudchaser took a seat next to Rainbow Dash, neither mare exactly sure what in the world was going on. Before they could ask, Thunderlane spoke up.
“I’m only doing this because Rumble asked me to,” he said to them. “I know you’re not privy to the details, so let me catch you up. Rumble’s been having problems at school and you’re to blame.”
“Wow, that’s quite the stretch there.” Rainbow Dash leaned in, advancing upon Thunderlane. “Please go on. I can’t wait to hear this.”
“I’m glad to hear that,” Thunderlane said right back, leaning in to show he wasn’t about to back down. “Rumble is a good colt and a great flier for his age. Scootaloo worships the wind you blow past in and she can’t fly. When Rumble told me that he was going to be helping her learn to fly with Featherweight, I was proud of him. At the time, I didn’t realize what a little bleeding heart that Scootaloo was when it came to you and your… charge. Rumble won’t explain to me why teaching Scootaloo to fly is an indication that he is on her side and your side, but the other fillies and colts at his school seem to know. As adults, we haven’t spited your friends because we’re a bit more mature than that; however, kids will use any excuse to cause trouble.”
“Still sounds kind of far-fetched,” Rainbow Dash said. She took another bite of her sandwich while Cloudchaser sipped on her water and watched the pair. “So… Rumble gets picked on because he’s friends with Scootaloo who idolizes me who takes care of Taboo who the town has it in their heads is some kind of evil monster.”
“No matter how it sounds, that’s how it is.”
“Well, what do you want me to do about it?” she asked. “I’m not going to stop taking care of Taboo or discourage Scootaloo from learning to fly. If Rumble is getting pushed around, it sounds like something you should be taking care of.”
“And that’s why I’m here.” Thunderlane reclined back in his seat. “I want to hear your side of things. I want to know what you know.”
“…Why?”
“Yeah, like, why?” Cloudchaser leaned in, more interested all of a sudden.
“Rumble is standing up for what he thinks is right,” Thunderlane explained. “As his big brother, it’s my job to make sure he stands up for the right things. I didn’t support him because I thought he was misguided, but he won’t let the issue drop. To put this to rest once and for all, I’m going to gather all the facts. After that, I will decide if Rumble is doing the right thing or not.”
“Oh, so you’re willing to listen to me?” Rainbow Dash asked, getting a nod from Thunderlane.
“Why do I have to be here?” Cloudchaser asked, raising a hoof like a school filly. Meanwhile, the two ponies not from Ponyville were wordlessly taking seats next to Thunderlane. “If you want to hear the story, just listen to it yourself.”
“What story?” the white stallion across from Cloudchaser asked, who Rainbow Dash believed was named Milky Way or something of the sort.
“I like stories,” the other mare, who Rainbow Dash was sure was called Wild Flower, said with a smile. “You can tell me the story.”
“The more ponies, the better,” Thunderlane said. “That means you too.” He turned to the pony trying to walk past the well-populated table. Raindrops stopped dead in her tracks, but didn’t turn to acknowledge anypony at the table. A tense second ticked by before she said anything.
“Do I have to?”
“YEAAAAAAAH! ” Snowflake sat down with a thud on the other side of Rainbow Dash.
With the pressure of pretty much the entire team on her back, Raindrops reluctantly took a seat at the table. Rainbow Dash marveled at the sudden turn of events. The only thing that was missing was for Lightning Dust to come barging in and sit down, but it never happened. Instead, Rainbow Dash started to tell the story of her and Taboo starting from the very first day. Everypony listened intently, sans interruptions.
“When is mommy coming back?”
“She’ll be back tonight, dearie.”
Taboo watched her grandmother continue painting for a few seconds. She spun around and left the patio, reentering the house. She trotted behind the sofa, around the coffee table, into the hallway, and then up the stairs. She took a sharp left turn and walked through the open door at the end of the hallway. There, scribbling away at one of the a long, long scrolls strewn out on his desk, was her grandfather. She wandered up behind him and tugged on his tail a little.
“When is mommy coming back?”
“She should be back for dinner, sport.”
Taboo listened while he continued to write, grumbling to himself between his teeth. Silently, she turned back around and went out of the room. Taboo ambled back down the stairs, plopping down back in the hallway. She trotted around the kitchen counter and then under then dining room table. She hopped up on the window sill and then down to the cloud surface below. Standing before her was her grandmother painting a large canvas set up on a large easel. Taboo hopped onto the unused chair next to her and poked the older mare’s side.
“When is mommy coming back?”
“She’ll be back tonight, dearie.”
No matter how many times she did this, the answers never changed.
Palette sighed and put down her brush. It had been a long, long time since there was a child in this house. The couple of old ponies who occupied it had become accustomed to going about their own pursuits without being bothered. It was time, however, to embrace the new reality.
“Let’s get your mind off of Dashie, shall we?” Palette said, scooping Taboo onto her back and heading into the house.
“Who is Dashie?”
“That’s my little nickname for your mommy,” Palette told her.
“Mommy calls me ‘squirt’ sometimes,” Taboo replied. “But my name is Taboo.”
“And it’s a darling name, dearie.” Palette brought Taboo into the kitchen and sat her down at the counter. “How about we have some lunch? Dashie promised she would be home before dinner, so the sooner lunch is over the sooner she’ll come back. How does that sound?”
“I’m hungry!”
“I suspected as much.” Palette turned towards the stairs. “Birdie! Come down here and have lunch!”
“Oooookaaaay!” he shouted back, but there was no indication that he really was coming down. Taboo knew it shouldn’t take so long for him to come down, but her grandma didn’t seem all that worried.
“He’ll be a while still,” she said, opening up the cupboard. She took out a large jar and set it before Taboo. She took the lid off, releasing a very familiar, sweet smell into the air. “Have some cookies while I see what else we have around.”
Taboo froze in place. It wasn’t that she didn’t want a cookie, but these proceedings were incredibly unorthodox. Mommy would only let her have one cookie after lunch only if she managed to clean her plate, but grandma was offering her “some” cookies before lunch was even ready. This went against mommy’s rules, but then again mommy wasn’t around.
“Can I really have some?” Taboo asked, just to be sure.
“Of course, dearie.”
Grandmas were truly wonderful things.
“Aww, what an adorable story!”
Rainbow Dash wanted to thank Cloudchaser or at least tell her to stop crushing her windpipe, but the hooves wrapped around her neck were keeping her from breathing let alone speaking. Meanwhile, everypony else gave their opinion of the tale.
“Wow, that’s quite the story,” Wild Flower said. “I think it’s real noble of you to take that poor filly under your wing.”
“Yeah,” Milky Way added in. “What kind of two bit parents abandon their foal in the Everfree? I know that if I found them I would hesitate to return her. It just isn’t right to do that, even if the foal is… eh… uh… what was the problem again?”
“The foal has wings like a bat and the eyes of a dragon,” Thunderlane explained. “It’s not natural. If it were a plain ol’ pegasus, we wouldn’t be sitting here discussing this.”
“… We wouldn’t?” Wild Flower asked, turning to Thunderlane. “I mean, the story is already pretty remarkable without the addition of the wings. A foal abandoned in the forest? Are you telling me you wouldn’t feel sorry for the poor thing?”
“There’s a reason it was out there,” Thunderlane replied, holding his ground while avoiding the question. “It’s possible she should have left well alone.”
“Well, I think she did the right thing,” Milky Way said. He looked across the table to Rainbow Dash, who was still struggling for breath. “I mean, I’d like to think I would have taken care of her too if I was in her shoes.”
“Yeah, well, you haven’t seen it.”
Rainbow Dash managed to free herself and fill her lungs with fresh air.
“If you judge her by appearance, you’re not doing her justice.” She looked Thunderlane square in the eye. He asked for this, so he was sure as anything going to take it all. “I don’t know if you’re actually afraid of her or just too stubborn to admit you’ve been wrong. If you really want to be able to override your little brother’s opinion, you’ve got to go farther than he has. Why don’t you meet Taboo yourself? She’s here with me, staying at my folk’s place. You could drop by and say hello, unless you’re too afraid.”
“Unlike you, we can’t leave the academy,” Thunderlane responded.
“Not during training you can’t,” a new voice chimed in. Everypony turned to the end of the table where Soarin’ was sitting with a huge smile plastered across his face. “Technically you’re allowed to go off base on your last night here since all that happens the next morning is boring awards and whatnot. We should all go to her house for a party!”
“… ‘We should?’” Thunderlane asked, confused by Soarin’s sudden inclusion.
“That sounds like fun,” Cloudchaser said, responding only to the word “party.” She put a foreleg around Rainbow Dash and pulled her close once again. “It’ll be a wonderful bonding experience.”
“Don’t even play innocent. I know what your motives are.” Rainbow Dash extricated herself from the embrace.
“Your story, while touching, has not swayed me,” Cloudchaser admitted freely. “But the price of my tolerance isn’t very high. Besides, I’m sure everypony here would love to throw a little party after we get done with training, right?”
Both Milky Way and Wild Flower smiled and nodded their consent while Snowflake shouted his to the heavens. Even Thunderlane reluctantly agreed to the proposition. The only pony who remained quiet was Raindrops. She was so quiet the others forgot about her entirely; however, Rainbow Dash took notice. The others kept on like nothing was wrong, but under the surface bad blood continued to flow.
“I’m ba-”
“You’re back!”
Rainbow Dash found herself tackled to the floor by a familiar little filly. She was too worn out to put up a fight, so Taboo managed to pin her down and climb on top of her head without any resistance.
“I thought you’d never come back!”
“Thinking or hoping?” Rainbow Dash asked, but no answer came. She waited until she realized Taboo was staring absently at the ceiling. “You’re thinking about it. Why are you thinking about it?”
“Grandma, mommy is back!” Taboo hopped off her mother’s head without answering either question. “We can eat now!” She trotted off to the kitchen while Rainbow Dash got back to her hooves. Somehow, the thought that Taboo hadn’t seemed to miss her all that much did nothing to comfort her.
She went into the kitchen herself to find the familiar sight of her mother setting the table while her dad sat around reading the paper. In the chair next to him, Taboo stood with her front hooves on the table, bouncing impatiently. The nostalgia was a bit too much for having just walked in the door.
“Oh, hello Dashie,” Palette greeted her daughter without much ceremony. “Be a dear and help me set the table.”
Rainbow Dash, sweaty and tired, just did as she was told. There was a part of her that wanted to protest, to say that she had just come home from an intense day of training. She had every right to lay down and take a breather, right? She should just relax. Why should she be doing something like helping with dinner?
“Dashie, can you put the rolls on the table?”
She knew the answer: this is what being a Wonderbolt required her to do. If she was going to take care of Taboo and follow her dream, that meant coming home wouldn’t mean leisure time. She had somepony else to look after, even if she herself was beaten and bruised. In a sense, it wasn’t any different from any other day of the week, month, or past year. She would spend the whole day letting the world kick her around, and then come home to make sure Taboo was happy. This kind of life was different from what she had imagined so long ago, but Taboo was a powerful force of change. Perhaps, she could extend that change to the others too.
“Mommy smells funny.”
“That’s because I worked hard today,” she said, scooting herself closer to Taboo in order to monitor her meal more closely. She made sure there were plenty of green vegetables on the filly’s plate. “How was your day, squirt?”
“I had fun,” Taboo said before snarfing down her carrots.
“Did she behave herself?” Rainbow Dash asked her parents.
“She was a perfect little angel,” Palette said, backed up by a grunt from her husband. “More importantly, how was the Academy? Did you make any friends?”
“As a matter of fact, I did.” Rainbow Dash was legitimately proud that she had found a true compatriot in Lightning Dust, and she was also glad that Milky Way and Wild Flower had taken a liking to her as well. Even Soarin’, who seemed to only appear at his own convenience, was a friendly face on the base. “Despite the Ponyville crowd, I should get along pretty well with everypony.” At the very least, Thunderlane and the rest weren’t antagonizing her.
“Well, isn’t that nice?” Palette said, taking a bite of the food she prepared. She chewed it, slowly, and then swallowed it. “Any stallions?”
“Mom, no.”
“You can’t blame me for trying.”
“Actually I can,” Rainbow Dash shot back, still chewing. “Nopony at the Academy is looking for a special somepony.” As she said this, she suddenly remembered Cloudchaser. She decided not to bring her up.
“What’s a ‘special somepony?’” Taboo asked. She stopped eating to look up at her mother, a clear sign that she was very interested in this vein of conversation. Rainbow Dash, conversely, didn’t want to drag Taboo into this. She tried to quickly think up a way to divert the conversation, but Palette wouldn’t allow that. The older mare was too much of a tactical genius to let this opportunity slip by.
“Why, a very special somepony is somepony you love very much and they love you back,” Palette explained, leaning into her husband who was still reading the paper. “Like me and grandpa. We’re special someponies.”
“We’re married,” he said just as a conditioned reaction, seeing as he wasn’t paying any heed to the conversation at hoof.
“That’s right! When two special someponies love each other very much, they get married!” Palette continued, very animated with her explanations. “And if they love each other very, very, very much they will become a mommy and daddy to a foal of their own.”
“OooooOooooh.” Taboo really didn’t understand what her grandma was saying, but it sounded very important.
“Mom, this isn’t dinner conversation.” Rainbow Dash needed a miracle to save her from this.
knock knock
“Honey, would you get that?” Birdie asked his spouse, flipping the pages of his newspaper to examine the sports section. “It’s probably the… eh… mmm.” Birdie never got around to saying who it might be, but Palette got up anyway and went to the door.
Rainbow Dash heaved a sigh of relief, thanking Celestia for rescuing her. Dinner continued in silence, but Palette took her sweet time returning to the table. Rainbow Dash perked up an ear for a moment to hear what might be going on down the hallway. She could hear her mother chatting somepony’s ear off animatedly.
That’s when the talking got louder and Rainbow Dash started hearing the other voice a bit more clearly, a voice she found familiar. The moment right before both ponies arrived in the kitchen, Rainbow Dash realized in abject horror what was going on.
“Look who’s here!” Palette announced, practically dragging Thunderhead through the house. When it came to matters of the heart, there was no power in Equestria that could stop a housewife. “I found him outside!”
“… Hey?” Thunderhead obviously didn’t want to be here, especially after the strange line of questioning he received at the door. Frankly, he had never before been asked if he was seeing anypony and then immediately asked how he felt about foals. These are the kinds of these that scare stallions to death. “I just wanted to make sure I had the right house.”
“You’ve got it!” Rainbow Dash stood up from the table with a start. “May as well get back to what you were doing, alright? Mom? Let the stallion go.”
“Now, now Dashie.” Palette looped her foreleg around Thunderhead’s and squeezed hard. “I can’t very well just let him go without properly thanking him for all the hard work he’s done for you.”
Rainbow Dash shot Thunderhead a look filled with enough venom to knock a more experienced soldier on his rear. He took it as a sign that he should be fighting on her side, whatever that meant.
“There’s no need, ma’am,” he said to the mare putting an increasingly powerful vice grip on his leg. “I’m just doing my duty.”
“Oh, but you really must let me thank you for looking after my daughter and granddaughter,” Palette said, insisting on her route. “Come now, you must be hungry.”
“No he isn’t.”
“Uh, yeah, I had breakfast before I came here.”
“Well, that just won’t do!” Palette continued to address Thunderhead, but focused her attention onto Rainbow Dash. “Breakfast was so long ago. Sit down and have some dinner, please.”
“He’s nocturnal,” Rainbow Dash responded before Thunderhead had a chance to. “His breakfast is at the same time as our dinner.”
“But when was the last time he had a home cooked meal?”
“He doesn’t want to impose on us. He just needs to get back to his post.”
“Come now, just a quick bite couldn’t hurt. Besides, he can guard you just fine from the inside of the house.”
Thunderhead got the feeling that he had been completely voided from this conversation. Instead of listening to the two mares go back and forth for whatever reason, he turned his attention to the tiny hoof trying to flag him down at the table.
He waved back at Taboo, who smiled up at him from her place at the table. It was a bit odd seeing her out of her normal environment, but it couldn’t be good for a growing filly to spend all her days in the same house. There was nothing like a visit to grandma’s and grandpa’s to shake things up, he thought.
“Fine, but only because he insists!” Palette finally said, releasing Thunderhead. He wasn’t sure how the argument arrived here, but he was thankful he could be on his way. “There’ll be plenty of chances for this one.”
He had no idea what that could possibly mean.
“Give it a rest, mom.” Rainbow Dash turned back to Thunderhead, this time without the anger. “Don’t just stand there, get a move on.”
“Of course.” Thunderhead threw the family a salute. “I’ll be patrolling outside if you need me.” With that being said, he turned and exited the house while the family got back to dinner. It was quiet again, but it couldn’t possibly stay that way.
“Oh, come on Dashie! He was perfect!” Palette insisted. “I mean, just look at him!”
“Mom, no, just no.” Rainbow Dash wasn’t going to have any more of this. “Dad, back me up here.”
“Listen to your mother.” He flipped through the paper, ignorant to all that had transpired.
“What exactly do you think Rainbow Dash would want in a care package?” Twilight asked, watching Rarity dig through one of her drawers for an unspecified reason.
“It’s the thought that counts in a care package, Twilight,” Rarity told her, shutting the first drawer and opening another. She tossed all the contents onto the floor before slamming it shut. “Just something to show her you care… hence the name.”
“Well… I could send her a book on aerodynamics.”
“If it were me receiving a book from you Twilight, I would certainly feel cared for,” Rarity said without even a trace of sarcasm. She took a drawer out of the desk and inspected the contents, but her search appeared to turn up dry once again as she set the drawer down on a pile of cloth adjacent to her.
“Maybe I should put in something for Taboo.” Twilight ducked to allow a few odds and ends fly over her head. She watched Rarity give up on the desk and move over to the closet. “I mean, Rainbow Dash is just flying and trying to be a Wonderbolt like she always is. Taboo has probably never been away from her for such extended periods of time. She’d probably like some cookies…”
“She’s staying her grandparent’s, Twilight. She’s probably swimming in cookies by now.”
“… Maybe I should send celery… or medicine.”
“All of that is viable,” Rarity yelled from the depths of her closet. Twilight could only imagine what kind of vast, unexplored tracts of carpet Rarity was traveling right now. “Anything is fine, really.”
“If anything is fine, why are you searching so frantically for one thing?” Twilight asked, not oblivious to what was going on. Rarity emerged from her closet and closed it with a frustrated slam.
“Because it would be just perfect!” She looked around the room for anywhere else it could possibly be, but nowhere stood out to her. Out of options, she turned to her last resort. “Pierce! Have you seen my crimson accessory box? Not the dark red one, but the crimson one!”
As if he had been waiting for his cue, Pierce burst into the room and dove straight under Rarity’s dresser. He disappeared completely from sight for a few seconds, and after a few loud banging noises, the doors flew open and he emerged with the box in question on his head. He jumped out and landed square in front of Rarity, bowing low so the box was just at the right level.
“It was… right where… you left it,” he said between labored pants.
“Oh Pierce, how did I ever manage without you?” she said, giving him a little pat on the head. “How is your butt today?”
“Recovering fine, thank you. I told you it wouldn’t keep me from helping out,” he said with a smile, even if the wound under the rather large bandage on his rear end twinged a little every time he took a step.
“Again, Pierce, I am so, so, soooo sorry about Spike,” Twilight said. “He was bound to react poorly, but I didn’t expect him to bite you.”
“Oh, it’s nothing at all, really.” Pokey Pierce was the only pony in history to be bitten by a dragon and survive to tell the tale. He didn’t know this, but he did know Spike’s teeth really smart upon insertion. He finally understood the expression “once bitten, twice shy.” Nevertheless, he had no regrets about what he did. “A stallion has to do what a stallion has to do.”
“Well, you’ve certainly done enough for now,” Rarity said, levitating the box she requested off her assistant’s head. “Anything else to report?”
“I love you.”
“Yes, that’s nice. Run along, darling,” she said, dismissing Pierce. He bowed even lower and backed up with his head to the floor all the way out the door, closing it gently behind him. Rarity opened the box and produces an almost criminally gaudy pair of sunglasses from inside. “There. Now Rainbow Dash won’t have to wear whatever tacky eyewear the Wonderbolts are making her wear!”
“Uh… Rarity… are you ever going to sort out your Pokey Pierce situation?” she asked. Ever since the stallion had brazenly declared his love for Rarity, Rarity hadn’t even so much as acknowledged his advances. It was almost as if she hadn’t realized it, but that was absolutely impossible unless she was blind and deaf. Judging by the sight of the sunglasses she was now toting, one of those just might be plausible. “I can’t say I’m the expert on love or relationships or anything… but it’s kind of rude to leave him hanging like this.”
“I know. It is a real pickle, isn’t it?” For the first time, much to Twilight’s surprise, Rarity showed some signs of actually caring, even if just a tiny bit. “I know he’s absolutely gorgeous and so very nice, just like a prince should be. Even if he isn’t a prince, he treats me like I’m royalty and shares my ambition of climbing to the top of the fashion empire. Ever since I hired him on, the boutique has been running a much tighter ship, but he still gives me plenty of space to work and just… well, be me. He’s a fine stallion and I’d hate to see some other mare snatch him up.”
“Aaaalright… so what’s the problem?” Twilight asked. At this point, she had to.
“Oh, it’s just that he’s kind of an idiot.” Rarity certainly didn’t mince her words. “He’s friendly and organized, but he’s just so tragically stupid.”
“Uh... huh.” Twilight waited to see how this played out.
“Now it isn’t a crime to be a few threads short of a sweater, but nothing clicks with him very quickly and I get impatient with him. I like to be fast and efficient, but Pierce is just so slow on the uptake. What he lacks in spine he makes up for in skull. He’s pretty much lost until I point him in the right direction. The problem is, Twilight, that we cancel each other out. He is slow and careful while I move with purpose and take risks!
“And besides, imagine if the two of us had a foal. The darling would be the most adorable thing on the planet but about as dumb as a rock. She would no doubt grow up to be one of those empty headed, shallow models who never had to work a day in her life just because she got good genes. Do you understand where I’m coming from?”
“Eh… maybe? Tell me if I’m on the right track,” Twilight said. “You want to marry somepony who works fast and is really smart to make sure your kids are plain geniuses?”
Rarity stopped, in a sense. She paused to regard the ceiling for a moment, obviously caught up in some thought. She mulled it over for a few moments before coming to a conclusion.
“No… that isn’t quite right,” Rarity said, tapping her chin with a hoof. “Oh dear… perhaps I actually need to think this over seriously.”
“You mean you hadn’t before?”
“Twilight, of course not,” Rarity said as if it were blatantly obvious she shouldn’t have even given this a serious thought before just right now. Even so, she looked very distressed now. “Oh my, oh my, oh my… Pierce is seriously interested in me… very much so. Oh dear, how should I respond to this?”
Twilight, for all her smarts and studying, still could not fathom the vast web of complexities surrounding romantic relationships. She decided, for the time being, that since she unraveled the mysteries of Friendship she was exempt from having to look into this other issue. It gave her a great deal of comfort.
“W-well… let’s just get this care package to Rainbow Dash,” Rarity said, seeking to change the subject as soon as possible. “Hopefully an uneventful visit to the Wonderbolt Academy will… calm my nerves.”
“Alright… well… in light of recent events we’re gonna have to change things up a little.” Spitfire looked up and down her Academy trainees, who numbered one less due to events the previous day. She wasn’t there for the entire thing, but apparently it all involved a hot air balloon, a tornado, and a flattened box. When it all came crashing down, she had a pretty heated confrontation with Rainbow Dash in her office over a pretty important subject. As much as she absolutely hated to admit it, the trainee had been absolutely right. Even worse, Rainbow Dash was so comfortable in her convictions, she was willing to up and quit entirely, which forced Spitfire to do the one thing she swore she would never do as long as she held command: request that they don’t quit.
After that painful experience, she had to move Lightning Dust from the squad for the final day of training. She was hurting moral a lot more than over-confident recruits are usually able to. Hopefully, a little discipline will get her to simmer down a bit. Of course, her training plan was compromised a bit due to the lack of a pair. It had required a bit of careful consideration on her part, but she decided exactly how she wanted to proceed with the last day of training.
“For the past week, you’ve learned to fly together in pairs. One pony led while the other pony followed, but that isn’t exactly how it works in the Wonderbolts. We are not a series of pairs, but one, massive, interconnected team. Since you all had such a wonderful little bonding experience yesterday, we’re gonna see how you fly as one big team!”
“Man… seriously?” Rainbow Dash grumbled to herself. She had finally become a leader, but she wasn’t even going to have a wingpony to lead. It felt like she’d gone through all those trails just to get a whole lot of nothing. A badge and recognition was nice, but a little authority would be even nicer.
“So I will be putting Rainbow Dash in charge!”
That was a lot more than a little.
“You’ve got half an hour to come up with a display of skill to present to me. I’d recommend getting a move on it!” Spitfire blew her whistle, the official signal that it was time to get down to business. Without another word, she flew off. The cadets were left to sort out what to do on their own, and they all turned to Rainbow Dash. She turned to address them, but their feelings on the matter were all over their faces.
“Alright, don’t give me that look. Don’t tell me you’re going to doubt me after all of that?” she asked, genuinely concerned despite her tone. If she showed weakness here, she was done for.
“Well, you did spend the entire week terrorizing us alongside Lightning Dust,” Milky Way pointed out.
“Yeah, but she was the leader!”
“And now you’re the leader,” Wild Flower said, cutting in and marching right up to her. “We’ve got no idea what’ll be like if you’re the leader. I’m sorry Rainbow Dash, but how do we know we can trust-”
“We can trust her,” Thunderlane said, pulling Wild Flower back. “She’s a born leader, Rainbow Dash. The only thing we need to worry about is her expectations of us.”
“Nothing short of perfection for RD,” Cloudchaser added in. “You can trust Thunderlane and me on this; we worked under her in Weather Patrol. She was Ponyville’s Weather Captain”
“Wait, you were the Captain?” Wild Flower asked. “You mentioned they fired you, but you were the Captain? How could they let the Captain go?”
“I already explained that,” Rainbow Dash said, not wanting to say it again. “They kicked me out because they’re biased against Taboo.”
“That seems a little extreme if you were captain,” Milky Way pointed out. “That story seems a bit far-fetched. Captains pretty much run their operation. They really wouldn’t get rid of one for that reason, right?” He turned to Cloudchaser and Thunderlane. Despite their opinions on the whole matter, they had to admit the whole thing didn’t sit all that well with them.
Weather Captains answer directly to the Weather Director, who is just the head administrator. The Captain is in the field, giving the orders and performing tasks themselves. The position commands more than just a little respect in and out of the Weather Patrol. For one to be excused so suddenly was unheard of, horrifying even. Everypony in Ponyville Weather Patrol knew she was the best Captain they could ask for, but none of them accepted the reason she was fired at their core. Distrust Taboo as they might, the speed at which everything happened was enough to make them suspicious.
“Our Director is a reasonable stallion,” Thunderlane told the two out of the loop. “I’m sure he made the decision he thought was best for our outfit. Right, Raindrops?”
All eyes turned to the mare who had been incredibly quite this whole week. With all eyes on her, she froze in place. Her eyes were fixed on the ground before her. She glanced over her shoulder.
“… Yeah.” She hoped that would be the end of that, but her pray was not upheld.
“Oh, that’s right!” A lightbulb went off in Cloudchaser’s head. “The Director is your father, right Raindrops? Do you know why he made such a quick decision?”
“I… we don’t talk much about his work,” she said, keeping from making eye contact with anypony. There was one, burning pair she avoided in particular.
“What? That can’t be right,” Cloudchaser said. “You two have gotta be talking about work, like, all the time.”
“What do you mean by that?” Milky Way asked. “I can believe it if her dad doesn’t want to talk about his work much.”
“It isn’t just his work,” Thunderlane told him. “Raindrops is the new Weather Captain.”
She could feel Rainbow Dash’s eyes boring into her. She kept staring at the ground, trying to make it go away.
“Wow, that’s gotta be tough,” Wild Flower said, turning to Raindrops. “Suddenly saddled with all that responsibility.”
“Yeah, that’s what I thought too,” Cloudchaser added in. “Just because she’s his kid doesn’t mean he can just ask her to do that. I thought he should like assign co-captains until one had enough skill to take on the proper responsibilities. It all happened pretty fast, though.”
“Weird for sure.” Milky Way scratched his head with a hoof. “That’d never fly back home.”
“I never thought to ask Raindrops about it,” Thunderlane said, turning to his taciturn wingpony. “Are you sure you don’t know anything about it?”
“Even a guess?” Cloudchaser asked. They all began asking her, and even though they were being polite about it she had the sudden sensation of being attacked from all sides. The words got caught in her throat. She held them there, refusing to look anypony in the eyes. She couldn’t say it. She wasn’t going to say it.
That’s when she made the mistake she told herself not to make.
“Yeah, Raindrops, enlighten us.”
She looked right into Rainbow Dash’s eyes, but her fear went away despite the raging inferno behind the mare’s eyes. The fire looked so distant and far away, like it couldn’t hurt her. Besides, it was clear Rainbow Dash knew; she had put it all together. Of course she could. The only thing Raindrops could do was prevent this angry mare to have the pleasure of revealing the truth herself.
“I asked to become Captain.” There was no hesitation in her voice now. “I took advantage of the situation to get promoted. I always thought I couldn’t advance with Rainbow Dash in the way, but then the opportunity presented itself.”
The silence was overwhelming. Nopony could help but looked shocked, aside from Rainbow Dash. She was just as steadfast as always, but now Raindrops was too. The spectators were unneeded bodies now for the conversation only existed between Raindrops and Rainbow Dash.
“But you already knew that, didn’t you?” Raindrops asked.
“What gave it away?”
“It was all that extra effort you put into being angry at me.”
“Well, I thought you’d never notice,” Rainbow Dash said, smiling. “I knew it was you who got it in the Director’s head that I should get booted off when I heard you’d been made Captain. I’m not surprised you’d go so far to get what you want, but I am shocked you kept it under wraps. I trusted you enough to at least stab me in the front. Besides, you would have been a hero. Why keep it a secret?”
“Because I don’t deserve to be a hero.” Raindrops broke eye contact for just a second. Despite her resolve, she wasn’t as strong as Rainbow Dash. She could suck it up and pretend, but only for so long. “I couldn’t feel ambiguous about your choices and proud of what I’d done. You were my hero, and I just wanted to get on your level somehow. To know that I had to use a trick like that to beat you in the end means I’m never going to really win. I got out of one rut just to get stuck in another… but at least there was someplace to look forward to going to from my other rut.”
“… So that’s how it is.” Rainbow Dash stepped right up to Raindrops. “You really put me out, you know? And for what? A job you can barely do and zero satisfaction? Because of what you did, I had trouble providing for the child I was trying to bring up! How can anypony expect her to grow up and forgive the ponies around her if something like that can happen for such a stupid reason?! You took something you gained nothing from away from me. Do you know how angry that makes me?”
Raindrops didn’t have anything more to say. At the time, the situation seemed so perfect. All she had to do was ask her father about it and suddenly it was so. She did it without even thinking. She took what she wanted, but found it wasn’t what she wanted at all. She’d done something terrible for nothing, and she didn’t want to admit it. She cast her eyes down again, defeated.
“… But I’m sorry.”
The two mares looked at each other again. Raindrops couldn’t believe what she’d just heard.
“I thought you just did it to spite me, like you hated me or something.”
“No, that wasn’t it at all!”
“Yeah, I realize that now,” Rainbow Dash said, heaving a sigh. “Look, can we just bury the hatchet? I’ve got no reason to hold a grudge, you’ve got no reason to hold a grudge.”
Just like that, the least likely pony was reaching out and offering absolution. Raindrops still couldn’t believe what was transpiring, and neither could the others. Worried that the brief window of opportunity was going to close, Raindrops reached out for her one chance for forgiveness.
“I don’t hate you. I’m sorry for causing you trouble…”
“Well, then that’s settled!” Rainbow Dash suddenly shouted. “Now, we can have more heart to hearts after we’ve blown Spitfire’s mind! I hope you all haven’t forgotten what we’re supposed to do!”
Unfortunately, they all had.
“And then she said we were ‘impressive, but you lack focus!’”
“Oh my. Well, at least she liked it,” Fluttershy said, being just about the billionth pony at the party to comfort Rainbow Dash on this point.
“Liked it? She absolutely loved it!” Soarin’ said. For the billionth time, Rainbow Dash wondered why he was here and how he had even figured out where it was happening. She had only told her friends and the other cadets who weren’t Lightning Dust. “She’s just too much of a straight lace to show any compassion to the newbies.”
“See, Mr. Soarin’ says everything is okay.”
“Yeah but he thinks everything is okay,” Rainbow Dash pointed out. Soarin’s unending cheer and optimism was starting to get on her nerves. “Mr. Soarin’ isn’t the one deciding if you pass or fail, though.”
“Please, Mr. Soarin’ was my father’s name,” the stallion said, completely unfazed by any complaints. “Besides, you all passed. I snuck a look at Spitfire’s stuff.”
“I wish you hadn’t spoiled the surprise,” Rainbow Dash told him, turning about to glare at the stallion.
“The suspense was killing me, so I had to find out. I don’t like surprises.”
“Well I do!” Rainbow Dash scanned the room for the only pony she could count on to keep this stallion out of her mane. “Pinkie, get over here!”
“Need something?” Pinkie asked, appearing behind Rainbow Dash not a moment after her beckoning. It was just a little creepy. “Is it streamers? I have lots of those! I ran out of confetti, but I know where we can get a loooot more! Don’t tell anypony… but I know a guy…”
“Pinkie, have you met Soarin’?”
“No, silly. The guy isn’t Soarin’!”
“No, I mean have you met Soarin’?” Rainbow Dash asked, hoping that reiterating the same question would force a serious answer out of her. She stepped aside so she could see the stallion in question before her. Soarin’ smiled his usual smile at her.
“Hey there!”
Pinkie Pie looked so shocked, Rainbow Dash was incredibly afraid she had broken her somehow. Without warning, her mane suddenly deflated and she shrunk into herself, eyes cast low to the floor. She shuffled her front hooves nervously.
“H-h-hi.” Pinkie Pie whispered.
Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy looked at each other, both wondering the same exact thing: was this a shared hallucination and if so who spiked the punch? There was no way that Pinkie Pie, the most outgoing pony that will ever exist, is being introverted. If she was, it just might be the strangest thing she had ever done. They needed to run tests to see if it was true.
“Hey, Pinkie… aren’t you going to offer him streamers or something?” Rainbow Dash turned to Soarin’. “You like streamers, right?”
“Can’t say I hate them!”
“How about it, Pinkie Pie?” Rainbow Dash nudged her friend, but nothing happened. She continued to nudge and shake, trying to provoke some sign of intelligent life. Pinkie Pie just jangled around limply as Rainbow Dash rocked her back and forth by her shoulders.
“… I don’t… he’s fine…”
“Are you sure Pinkie?” Fluttershy asked, a small part of her a bit miffed that her friend was outdoing her in the shyness department. Although, she thought it was just fine if she wanted to be the shy one now… it was okay; however, she still wanted the old Pinkie back. “Don’t you want to go dance with him or roll out the Party Cannon or-”
“Eeeek!” Pinkie Pie suddenly jolted to life, turning about and grabbing Fluttershy around the neck. With practiced precision, she twisted Fluttershy’s neck with a very alarming snap.
“… Oh my.” The pegasus collapsed on the floor, wide-eyed and too shocked to move.
Pinkie Pie, on the other hoof, dashed out of the room as fast as her legs would take her. Rainbow Dash and Soarin’ just watched, both in equal states of confusion.
“Wow, she certainly seems interesting,” Soarin’ said, resuming his easy smile. “I think I’m going to try talking to her again.”
“Yeah, good luck.” Rainbow Dash watched him go as she helped a very confused, yet rid of all of her shoulder and back pain, Fluttershy. “What was that all about?”
“That’s what I always ask myself when I spend time with Pinkie Pie.”
“Oh, there you are!” Cloudchaser appeared before the other two pegasi. For some reason, she looked incredibly panicked and out of breath. “Are you aware that there’s an ebony god standing outside this house?”
“… What?”
“The guard! In the dark armor! His chest! Those eyes! I think I’m swooning! Do I look like I’m swooning?” Cloudchaser asked, but she talked much too fast to be understood. “You didn’t tell me you had another guard!”
“Was I supposed to?” Rainbow Dash asked. She finally put the pieces of the puzzle together, figuring out what was going on. “Wait… you’re talking about Thunderhead?”
“Depends,” Cloudchaser said, bringing a pensive hoof to her chin. “Does this ‘Thunderhead’ have the gait of the most potent deflowerer in existence?”
“He’s the guard outside the house.”
“Then yes! Yes on both accounts!” Cloudchaser grabbed Rainbow Dash’s shoulders and began to shake her violently. “Forget that other guard! I want hiiiiiim!”
“Are you being serious right now?” Rainbow Dash staggered back from the questionably insane mare. “I take it you’ve taken the time to look at him.”
“I’ve done nothing but look at him… so far.”
“Then you must have noticed the wings and the eyes.” Rainbow Dash waited for her point to sink in, but Cloudchaser didn’t look like she understood where her logic fell short. “Have you seen my daughter? You must have noticed the wings and the eyes.”
“Hey, our deal is still on, RD,” Cloudchaser said, still missing the point. “Give me a smooth introduction and we’ll call it square.”
“… Cloudchaser, do you know what a double-standard is?” Rainbow Dash asked, but the other mare appeared to take offense to this.
“Are you implying I’m stupid? Look, RD, I’m not the brightest star in the sky, but I still want to be treated with, like, respect. Just because you don’t instinctively drool over everypony in a suit of armor doesn’t mean you’re any better than me, okay? We should sort out our differences like adults, okay? There is no need for all this passive aggressive sarcasm!” Cloudchaser finished her speech by striking a very confident pose with her chest puffed out and her nose in the air. Rainbow Dash was actually taken back by her sudden seriousness.
“Alright, alright. Sorry,” she said. As long as Cloudchaser wanted to do things civilly, Rainbow Dash wasn’t about to object. All she needed to do was prove she was capable of mature, constructive discourse.
“Good… now what’s a double-standard?”
“Stay away from Thunderhead.”
“I will be back, Rainbow Dash!” Cloudchaser yelled as she retreated, even though the house wasn’t all that big and neither of them were all that far apart. In the end, she had the last laugh for leaving Rainbow Dash behind feeling awkward.
“Wow, you two get along so well now,” Fluttershy said with very little basis.
“Yeah, like two peas in an uncomfortable pod.”
“Hey… uh, Rainbow Dash.”
Rainbow Dash turned to see Thunderlane shuffling up, which indicated it was now his turn to annoy her about something. She wondered what had started this parade of faces.
“Need something?” Rainbow Dash had to ask. If she didn’t, he might stand there all day staring at his hooves. It was a bit odd to see Thunderlane nervous about something, but plenty of strange things had already happened tonight.
“I want to ask you a favor,” he said first thing, almost predictably. “But before that, I just want to clear the air between the two of us. You proved that you’re capable of good judgment this past week, so I’m going to go ahead and trust you about Taboo.”
“Wow, you used her name without hesitating,” Rainbow Dash remarked, poking fun at him now that she was obviously in control here. “Whatever you want you must want it bad.”
“This has nothing to do with that I want!” Thunderlane retorted, but quickly recomposed himself. “I’m trying to be serious here. Whether or not you help me, my position on this stands. It’s stupid for Rumble to get grief because of this, so I’m going to do what a big brother should. I’m not super excited about all of it, but it’s what I want to do now. Anyway, we’re cool now, right?” Thunderlane reached out a hoof in friendship, and he was surprised by how quickly Rainbow Dash returned the gesture.
“… Yeah, we’re cool. No point in holding a grudge,” Rainbow Dash said after their hoof bump. “Now, what’s this favor you have to ask?”
“So yeah… you know your friend, Rarity?”
“She’s my friend, so…. yeah, I know Rarity.”
“I just wanted to know whether or not she was… seeing anypony,” Thunderlane asked, albeit indirectly. Rainbow Dash wondered what brought this on so suddenly, but the events of Thunderlane’s earlier rescue of the unicorn might have put it in his head that he has a leg up on the competition now. She smirked, a sure sign that something wonderfully terrible was forming in her mind. She scanned the ponies in the room and found her friend.
“Hey, Rarity!” she called across the room. Thunderlane went as stiff as a board. On the other side of the room, Rarity turned her head to figure out who called her name. When she made eye contact with Rainbow Dash, she cocked an eyebrow and pointed to herself. “Get over here!”
“Wait, Dash! You don’t need to-”
“You rang?” Rarity had arrived. As previously mentioned, the room wasn’t all that big.
“Yeah, Thunderlane wanted to talk to you.” Just like that, Rainbow Dash threw Thunderlane under the carriage. She stepped back with Fluttershy and prepared to observe.
“Why hello, Thunderlane. I just can’t thank you enough for rescuing me!” Rarity batted her eyelashes at the stallion, an action that could be easily misconstrued as flirting. This is just how she gets when sincerely thanking other ponies. “You wanted to talk about something?”
“Ah, yeah… well… just wondering if you were okay,” Thunderlane said, desperately trying to backpedal without falling all over himself.
“I am the picture of health, thanks to you!” Rarity gave him another hug, which left Thunderlane somewhere between a state of heavenly euphoria and intense despair. When she released him, Rarity missed the entirely dismal look on his face. “Was that all?”
“Eh, well… no.” Thunderlane decided he may never have a chance like this ever again in his life. He may as well take it. “I was wondering if maybe you would maybe want to go get a cup of coffee maybe sometime down in Ponyville… maybe.”
Rarity regarded him for a moment, outwardly looking unmoved by his question. Thunderlane had his eyes screwed shut, so he didn’t see what was going on. He waited nervously until Rarity spoke up.
“Why, I’d gladly go some coffee with the dashing stallion who saved me…”
Thunderlane couldn’t believe his ears. In all his years of trying to get a date, he had never known success like this. He cheered and jumped for joy inside, but Rarity wasn’t done.
“So why haven’t I taken the nice stallion who is always helping all day out for anything?” she asked herself, completely forgetting about Thunderlane. “I mean, I was ready to marry a Prince just because he was a Prince, but I won’t even go on a date with a stallion for many, many more legitimate reasons? It’s all very foalish, if I do say so myself. I’ve done all this thinking about it and thiiinking about it, but it’s a simple matter. I should just give him a chance if that’s what he wants. Hmm… it feels like a weight has been lifted off my shoulders! Now… I wonder what I should make him wear on our first date.”
Thunderlane had left at this point, having realized that another crush had crushed him. Rainbow Dash left Fluttershy with Rarity in order to schmooze her way to the dining room for a little snack. Before she could get there, another pony appeared before her.
“Oh Dashie! I’ve found the perfect stallion for you!” It was none other than Rainbow Dash’s mother and relentless matchmaker.
“Mom, I know everypony here. If I wanted to date any of them, I wouldn’t need you to push me into it,” Rainbow Dash explained, but by now she should have known better than to try and stop these from happening. Once Palette got going, it took a lot to slow her momentum down.
“But you do need me to push you! You just don’t know you want to date this stallion yet,” Palette explained. “I’ve been talking to that nice stallion with the white coat, and he is just the sweetest thing. You should go over and talk with him!” Palette pointed into the little crowd and Rainbow Dash turned her head to see where Milky Way was happily chatting with Raindrops and Wild Flower.
“Look, Milky Way is nice and all, but I’m not into him,” Rainbow Dash said, but this appeared to confuse her mother. Palette looked into the crowd and pointed again.
“No, no. Not him. I mean him!”
“YEAAAAAH! ”
“… Mom, have you seen Taboo around?” Rainbow Dash asked, deciding not to even entertain this avenue. She meant no offense to Snowflake, but sometimes a mare just has to draw the line.
“Your father was with her. I think they stepped out for a bit of air,” Palette said. “Come back here quickly, though! I really want you to talk to this stallion!”
Rainbow Dash ignored her mother and her desire to get a snack. She headed towards the back door without another word. When she got out to the patio, her father was indeed there with Taboo. Unsurprisingly, the little filly was fast asleep on her chair. Tonight had been an exhausting night of introductions and such, so it was only a matter of time before she crashed.
“You on Taboo duty tonight?” Rainbow Dash asked, taking a seat next to her father.
“Your mother wanted to scope out potential coltfriends for you,” he told her. “Did she have any success?”
“She sure thinks she has,” Rainbow Dash said, reclining back. “I don’t even want to hear about relationships anymore tonight. First Pinkie Pie got all weird, then Cloudchaser bugged me, after that it was Thunderlane, then Rarity, and finally my own mother. I just don’t get like them, you know? I don’t have all these… feelings.”
“Well, feelings are only part of the equation, Rainy.”
“Oh no, don’t you lecture me.”
“I think you need to hear this,” her father retorted. “Love has a lot to do with conscious decisions we make. You’ve been able to stave it off so long because you decided you don’t need it; however, there is one pony you decided to love recently.”
“Oh? Who?”
He pointed at the sleeping foal between them.
“You didn’t take in Taboo just because of feelings, did you?” he asked. “I’m sure after you started taking care of her, you felt all sorts of conflicting emotions and experienced all sorts of consequences. You consciously decided to take her in and give her love, so here you are keeping right at it despite everything else. You might not believe it, Rainy, but that Element of Loyalty you hold so dear is probably best suited for love.”
“… I guess that makes sense.” Rainbow Dash furrowed her brow and slumped back, angry that her father had a valid point. “But then I’m right in not getting caught up in the moment and chasing after every stallion with a strong lower jaw. It wouldn’t do me any good to make decisions I can’t stick by.”
“Yes, you’re absolutely right.” He looked up to gaze at the stars. From the high vantage point of Cloudsdale, they seemed to shine the brighter here than anywhere else. At least, that’s how he felt about it. “Love is different for everypony, I suppose. Some of us can decide to get swept away by emotions while some of us have to take a more sane approach. If you’re not doing what you think is right, then you’re not doing it right.”
“Super. Would you tell that to mom?”
“You tell her,” her father said, looking back down at her. “I’m the one who has to share a bed with her.”
“Ugh! Can we just stop talking about this?” Rainbow Dash asked, sinking the rest of the way into her chair. “I came out here to escape all this relationship talk.”
“Fine, fine. You deserve a break, Rainy. You did a good job this week, from what I hear. I expected nothing less from my little Wonderbolt.”
“Thank you,” Rainbow Dash said, letting an easy smile form on her face. “When I get back to Ponyville, I don’t even want to hear ponies talk about love or special someponies. I’ll just get back to training and enjoy the single life with my kid. Is that too much to ask for?”
“Who knows?” Both pegasi looked up at the stars, just relaxing and admiring them. They used to do this frequently when Rainbow Dash was just a filly, so doing it now felt all too nostalgic for the old stallion. His little Wonderbolt was on the way to becoming an actual Wonderbolt. He was aware how fast time was moving now. It wouldn’t be long at all. He decided he needed to enjoy his daughter’s youth while he could, spend time with the filly he had grown so fond of after all these years. “So… what’s this about strong lower jaws?”
5
Two ponies stood at the dusty crossroads, contemplating which direction they should be heading. The options were wide open for them, but that didn’t make things easy. On one hoof, they could travel far north and see the Crystal Empire where the next Pony Games would be held. On the other hoof, they could rumble on up the mountain to Canterlot in order to catch a glimpse of the new Princess. There were even more options than that, and such was their predicament. The mare of the pair mulled it over, sitting comfortably astride the wagon pulled by her enormous, male counterpart.
“Shucks, I just don’t know Hon’. I’ve got this feeling that destiny is going to guide us to our next destination… but dangit, I haven’t got the slightest clue what destiny wants! Do you have any ideas?”
The stallion just rolled his eyes and took a swig of water. Anywhere was fine with him, as long as it made her happy. It didn’t take much, so he wasn’t very worried; however, she seemed to be more conflicted about this than any other decision before. He could suddenly feel the weight of what she was trying to decide, and boy was it heavy. Perhaps destiny really did have plans for them.
“… Say, you know where we’re not far from,” the mare said, turning to the stallion. “You think… do you think it’s time to go back?”
“Fer a visit?”
“For good.”
The pair got real quiet. Now there was a suggestion to trump all other suggestions. These two old fogeys had been living on the road for so long, they could hardly remember what settling down was like. They weren’t even sure they knew how anymore. Now that the decision lay in front of them, they doubted it.
“Ah think if’n destiny wanted us to return home, it’d send us a clear sign.” This was a risky decision. If they stopped now, they might be unhappy with it. He didn’t want that, at all. “Ah reckon we should go to the Crystal Empire. Never been thar before.”
“… Yeah… yeah, of course!” the mare said as if she’d just been awoken from a strange dream. “If destiny wanted us to end our journeying… why, she would have sent an engraved invitation!”
“Hello down there!”
Both earth ponies looked up to the sky to see a wing silhouette spiraling down towards them. There was only one pegasus in all of Equestria who could have and would have tracked them down to this sun-baked expanse of the world.
“Well I’ll be! If it isn’t Derpy!”
The pair waited for the pegasus to touch down next to their cart, decked out in her mailmare uniform and saddlebags. She turned to them and smiled, her eyes shifting focus as she did.
“Well, isn’t this a surprise. Did somepony send a letter to us?” the mare asked, hopping down from the cart. “How is it you always managed to find us, despite losing so many other folks’ mail?”
“Just luck I suppose!” Derpy said, shrugging off her shortcomings as a postal worker. It wasn’t all that bad, but once a pony delivers a box of starving coyotes to the wrong address ponies don’t tend to forget it.
Derpy reached into her bag and produced a simple, elegant letter. She gave it to the mare and gave her a short salute before flapping off. There were many, many more deliveries to make and Derpy had no idea where she was.
“Well, what is it?” the stallion asked, curious about their first piece of correspondence in a while. Judging from the envelope and the stationary inside, it looked rather fancy. “It ain’t one of them Gryphonian Princes askin’ fer bits, is it?”
He waited, but his companion didn’t say a word. She just continued to stare at the letter. He craned his neck in to get a look for himself, but she suddenly packed the letter away and jumped back on the cart.
“Giddyup! We’ve got to get where we’re going fast!”
“Really? Where would that be? Just what was that letter?”
“That, Hon’, was our engraved invitation.”
“Rainbow Dash, hold still!”
“You’ll never take me alive!”
“Grab her wings!”
“The tail, the tail!”
“Ouch! Hey! You’re trying to hurt me, aren’t you!”
“Such accusations!”
“Oh, I’m sorry…”
“Don’t apologize to her!”
“Let me go!”
“Just hold still already!”
“Good work ladies, leave the rest to me.” Rarity levitated into position over Rainbow Dash. The three mares holding down Rainbow Dash got ready to leap out of the way while the wild pegasus squirmed underneath them. “On three… one… two… three!”
All at once, the weight on top of Rainbow Dash was released and the dress was thrown over her like a net. There was no escape, and the moment the garment was over her head the three mares returned and began getting her through the rest of the holes. It was a violent, messy affair, but after much struggling the process was complete. Rainbow Dash stood there in the same getup she wore to cadence’s wedding.
“Well, looks like it still fits you,” Rarity said, inspecting the antsy pegasus.
“I told you it would! There was no point in doing this.” Rainbow Dash told her, quoting her previous complaints. “Can I take it off now?”
“Fine, fine.” Rarity scarcely gave Rainbow Dash permission before she bolted out of the dress, leaving it suspended in place for just a few seconds as she stood beside it. The garment crumpled to the floor while Rainbow Dash walked back over to sit with Taboo.
“Mommy, do I get a dress for the wedding?” she asked, much more excited by the whole process than her mother was.
“Rarity insists on it, so yes.”
“Yaaaay!”
“You’re going to look absolutely adorable, darling!” Rarity said, but quickly turned her attention to the other bridesmaids. “That takes care of Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy. Lily and Daisy, I have the pieces I’ve prepared for you in the back. They still need a bit of work, but I just want to check the sizes again before I get too much farther. Wait a second and I’ll go-”
“I’ll get them!” Pierce suddenly jumped up from where he was sitting and galloped full tilt to the back. He returned levitating both mannequins in record time, setting them down gently next to Rarity.
“Why thank you, Pierce,” Rarity said, with an added little peck on the cheek, but her face quickly went sour. “Eager to see Lily in her dress I see…”
“Not at all!” Pierce said much too quickly, getting a glare from Lily. “I mean, I do want to see her in the dress!” He wasn’t sure why he was apologizing to her; Lily wasn’t his marefriend.
“Sit down with the other stallions,” Rarity commanded coldly, forcing him to return to the other males in the wedding party. He hung his head and slouched down between Time Turner and Caramel. Ever since Big Macintosh asked him to be one of his groomsmen, he’d been getting flak from Rarity. She wasn’t in the wedding party herself, but she was extremely relevant in getting things ready. No matter where he went, her jealous eyes were watching. Not even his male compatriots could offer him any solace.
“She’ll get over it Pierce,” Caramel assured him. “It isn’t like you’re the one getting married.”
“I know, I know, but things were going so well before this,” Pierce griped.
“Well, this is a sign things are going well too,” Time Turner said. He pulled at his tie for the millionth time today and cleared his throat. “She seems extremely adverse to the thought of you with another mare, so it’s a clear sign that she is fond of you. Don’t let her attitude dishearten you too much.” He continued to mess with his tie.
“I don’t want to hear anything from you, Turner,” Pierce said, glaring at the uptight earth pony. “You get to walk up the aisle with your personal Goddess.”
“Yeah, you’re the lucky one here,” Caramel said, folding his forelegs in front of him. “My marefriend is with Applejack and you get to be across the way from Fluttershy. You didn’t bribe Big Macintosh and Roseluck, did you?”
“… Bribe is not the correct term.”
“So you begged like a dog?” Caramel asked, but Turner didn’t answer. He went of fidgeting with his tie, trying not to steal glances over to where Fluttershy was helping Rarity.
“Would y’all quit yer belly achin’? Applejack said to the other groomsmen. She was playing the part of the Best Mare in the ceremony, so she felt like she was in charge of keeping the guys in line. All Pierce and Caramel ever did was complain about things while Time Turner just clammed up whenever Fluttershy was in the room. Being the Best Mare felt more like being a glorified foalsitter. “They’re your friends Big Mac, say somethin’ to them.”
Big Macintosh wasn’t paying any attention at the moment, which Applejack could clearly see by the way he was giggling shamelessly with his fiancée curled up next to him. He had been tough as nails leading up to the proposal, but ever since then he’d turned into a giant teddy bear. Applebloom kept saying it reminded her of last Hearts and Hooves Day, but Applejack had no idea what that was even supposed to mean.
“Sakes, those two need a healthy dose of reality right about now,” Applejack said to herself. She got up and made sure her brother and soon to be sister-in-law could see her. “If’n case y’all hadn’t noticed, there is a little dissent among the ranks.”
“Applejack, we know about that,” Roseluck assured her while Big Macintosh nibbled on her ear. “That’s why we thought it would be great if we brought everypony down here to get fitted together. It’s a great bonding experience.”
“Eeyup.”
“I think it’s going well!”
Applejack took a look around at the ponies in the room. Lily and Daisy were still actively avoiding Rainbow Dash, who wasn’t making much of an effort to talk to them either. The stallions were still in an encampment by themselves and Fluttershy wasn’t talking to anypony except Rarity. This wasn’t what a rousing success looks like.
“Well, at least we’re actually getting the work done,” Applejack said, accepting defeat. “I should be happy that it’s so peaceful.”
Right on cue, the door to Carousel Boutique burst open so quickly it detached the bell and sent it skittering across the floor. The massive hoof that opened the door stayed suspended in the doorway while a deep red mare swiftly ducked inside under it. She wore a smile from ear to ear and her green eyes darted all over the room. The first pony to make the mistake of establishing eye contact was Applejack.
“Lil Jackie!”
“Oh my… Ma?!” Applejack found herself in the powerful embrace of the small yet surly mare she bore a strong resemblance to.
“Oh, it’s been so long! You went and got so big!” her mother said, releasing her to step back and take a look. “And what a shame too. You were so adorable when you were little. Speaking of ponies who aren’t little!” The mare spun around to where an astonished Big Macintosh was now on his hooves.
“Uh… howdy, Ma…”
“Don’t you ‘howdy’ me mister!” his mother shouted, suddenly very cross. “Y’all don’t have the decency to write to us for so long, but then all of a sudden we get a wedding invitation in the mail? Honestly, what kind of family doesn’t keep each other up with that kind of information? I still wasn’t sure you even liked mares!”
“Ma!”
“Oh, hush up.” The mare looked around, noticing for the first time that she wasn’t just among family. “Whoops, I seem to be causing a bit of a scene. Sorry, sorry, but this is all rather exciting for me. I guess I went and forgot my manners. Allow us to introduce ourselves! We are… we… Hon’? Where’d you disappear to?”
“Right here,” a powerful voice said from the boutique door. A stallion of immense size with a blonde mane and beard that probably hadn’t been touched by a brush in years was calmly examining the door he just broke. He lumbered over to the group and took his spot next to his spouse.
“Well, without further ado we’d like to introduce ourselves. I’m the mother of the groom, Poison Apple, and this is the father of the groom, Big Apple.”
“Hold on… Big Apple?” Caramel asked, a smile forming on his face. He looked up at Big Macintosh, who was already cringing. “Big Macintosh Apple is really Big Apple Jr.?”
“Junior never did like being called Junior,” Poison said with a wistful smile. “Oh, but we knew he was going to grow up to be a big guy like his daddy, so it only made sense to name him that. Macintosh was Big’s cousin or uncle or something like that. Oh, Junior was so adorable when he was just a little colt! Oh, I wish I had the pictures on me!”
“Ah think we kin hold off on pictures,” Big Macintosh said, trying to stave off any further embarrassment for the time being.
“How did you two get the invitation so fast?” Applejack asked. “We sent them out this morning!”
“Never doubt the mail system, Jackie,” Poison told her, completely dodging the question. She had far more important inquisitions to make. “Now, enough about us and our kin, where’s the bride-to-be?”
The group was about to speak up, but the far more commanding voice of Big Apple shut them down.
“Ain’t it obvious?” he said, pointing a big hoof over to where Rainbow Dash was sitting with Taboo. Rainbow Dash moved to protest, but Poison moved far faster than she did. In the brief moment she noticed Taboo, she swooped in and lifted the filly high over her head. She smiled even more intensely before.
“I can’t believe it, I’m a grandma already!” Poison cheered. “And my grandbaby is such an adorable little filly too! Now you just can’t be related to my son, now can you? She looks more like that cousin or uncle of yours, Hon’. What’s his name? Who am I thinkin’ of?”
“Fuji.”
“That’s right, Fuji Apple! Oh yes, I can see the Apple Family resemblance for sure. They’re such strong genes, you know,” Poison said to Rainbow Dash, who could only stutter in response. “There aren’t many pegasi in the Apple family, mind you, but I think it’s good that we’re mixing the blood up some. I know Big has a cousin or uncle who married a pegasus. What was her name again?”
“Liberty.”
“That’s right, Liberty Apple! Oh, you’ll get along just fine with her. You’ll get along with the rest of the family too, but I know she’ll be happy to see another pegasus in the family.” Poison turned back to Taboo, and took a little closer stock of her this time. The filly seemed pretty surprised by all of this, staring at the strange mare with her golden eyes and carefully stretching her little wings. “Oh my… she is just so adorable!” It was unclear if everything was registering with Poison.
“Ma, that isn’t your grandchild,” Applejack said, finally putting an end to her parent’s antics. “That’s Rainbow Dash and Taboo, a friend of ours and her kid.”
“Oh… whoops.” Poison shot a glare at Big Apple for misleading her, but he just turned his eyes up to the ceiling. He wasn’t the one who let his mouth run. “Well, she’s still a darling little filly!”
“Uh, thanks?” Rainbow Dash said, knowing she really didn’t have anything to do with that fact. Poison reluctantly hooved Taboo back to her mother. “You okay there, squirt?”
“She talks a lot,” Taboo said, rubbing her ears. “Is she really my grandma? I thought I already had a grandma.”
“No, she’s not your grandma,” Rainbow Dash explained. She realized that having two sets of grandparents was absolutely plausible, but she held that information back for the time being.
“Okay, would the actual bride like to make herself known?” Poison asked.
“That’d be me,” Roseluck said, stepping up from Big Macintosh’s side. “I’m Roseluck. It’s really nice to meet you, Mrs. Apple.”
“My, my… aren’t you a pretty young thing? You’re faaar too pretty to be marrying my son,” Poison joked, making Roseluck feel a lot more at ease about the older mare. Still, the way Poison was eyeing her reminded Roseluck of the way a judge looks at a flower during a competition. “Such a waste. A mare as pretty as you could have easily lasted a few more years being single. How sure are we that this still isn’t a shotgun wedding?”
“Ma!” Big Macintosh couldn’t believe that both his father and his mother thought he had gotten his bride pregnant before marrying her.
“I’m just teasing, Junior. I’m very happy for both of you, really. Your father is happy too, aren’t you Hon’?”
“Hm? Of course,” he said. He reached up and stroked his beard with his hoof. “She seems like a fine mare. I hope to get to know her better.”
“Thank you, Mr. Apple,” Roseluck said with a little bow. The enormous stallion cast his eyes up again and blushed. “And thank you too Mrs. Apple.”
“Oh, please just call me Poison or Ma,” she said, giving Roseluck a big hug. “Ponies will be calling you Mrs. Apple pretty soon anyway.”
“I guess you’re right.” Roseluck giggled along with Poison, something that didn’t sit well with Big Macintosh for some reason. He got the feeling a very dangerous alliance had just been born. His mother disengaged from Roseluck and gave her son a big hug.
“I’m proud of you, Junior. Make her happy, alright?”
“Eeyup.” Despite all their antics, Big Macintosh knew his parents weren’t liars. Whatever they said, they meant.
“I bet she gets really wild in the sack, right?”
“M-ma!”
“Wow, Applejack’s family is weird,” Rainbow Dash said to herself. She watched the happy family laugh with one another and exchange affection, but every once and a while she caught Poison Apple looking at her. Rainbow Dash couldn’t exactly place the look, but it made her uncomfortable for some reason. She shook it off, convinced she was just imagining things.
Due to the incoming wedding, Roseluck had closed up shop for the time being. That meant Rainbow Dash was on paid vacation from making deliveries, but it also meant she had nothing to do all day. She spent most of her time at home reading and watching after Taboo, but all the free time was starting to lose its charm. Even Taboo was showing signs of getting bored. The worst part was Rainbow Dash knew that it wouldn’t end after the wedding either. Roseluck and Big Macintosh would go off on their honeymoon, which meant two more weeks of no work.
On the bright side, the rehearsal dinner for the wedding was tonight. Even if it was more wedding stuff, any break in the monotony was welcome at this point. She lay on her couch with Taboo, staring at her clock until it was time to go. Taboo couldn’t tell time yet, so it made is especially difficult for her. Still, she was very excited because her mother was letting her stay up past her bedtime for the event. It was a rare event indeed, so she fought the urge to sleep as hard as she could.
“Well, we can be fashionably early, right?” Rainbow Dash got up from the couch, with Taboo tagging along right beside her. “Ready to go!”
“Yes!” Taboo beamed brightly, trotting over to the door. Rainbow Dash opened the door into the night, letting the warm summer wind blow through her coat. Even this far up, the air still held onto its warmth.
“Going out?” Thunderhead asked, standing at his post right outside the door.
“Yeah. It’s the rehearsal dinner for the wedding,” Rainbow Dash explained.
“Kinda late for dinner,” Thunderhead said, looking up at the moon. It was past his breakfast and a normal pony’s dinnertime, especially with way the summer days lingered on.
“That’s just the way it is,” Rainbow Dash told him, not really knowing or caring about all the details. They had said something about Big Macintosh needing time to work between the rehearsal ceremony or something like that. All Rainbow Dash knew is he had something to do still and she didn’t, which made her a bit jealous. “We were just about to head out.”
“We?”
“Yeah, me and Taboo.” Rainbow Dash gestured to where Taboo should have been standing next to her, but there was only vacant space. She looked about frantically until she heard the familiar sound of the toilet flushing upstairs. She smacked her forehead, half of her relieved and the other half not surprised at all. She heard the bathroom door open up and then little hooves scrambling down the stairs.
Taboo ran into the doorway and skidded to a halt. She looked up at her mother with a surprised look, as if she hadn’t thought her little delay would have been spotted. Taboo smiled like nothing was wrong while Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes.
“C’mon, let’s get going.”
Taboo hopped on her mother’s back. Rainbow Dash galloped off the edge of the cloud and spread her wings, taking off into the night. Behind her, Thunderhead glided easily along as they approached Sweet Apple Acres. The lights in the barn were on, indicating the possibility of activity. Even if it was dark, Rainbow Dash could see the area was devoid of any other ponies.
Despite probably being far too early, she landed in front of the barn and looked inside. As to be expected, the Apples were still getting things set up. Rainbow Dash wondered if she should go inside or not. She certainly didn’t see any merit in hanging around outside.
“Rainbow Dash?”
Before she got the chance, Roseluck appeared behind her. She was balancing plates on her back and beaming brightly. Over the past few days, she had a tendency to bounce between excited and paranoid, so Rainbow Dash was glad to see she was in her more pleasant mood presently.
“Hey, sorry I’m a bit early,” Rainbow Dash said, chuckling a bit and stepping aside from the door. She pulled it open a little so Roseluck could pass through more easily. “Need any help?”
“No, no, it’s all going perfectly!” Roseluck said, still beaming. “Come on in. We’re going to be starting soon, so everypony else should be arriving right about now. Oh, speaking of which…” Roseluck turned her attention down the road and waved ecstatically. Rainbow Dash turned to, seeing Lily and Daisy coming up the road towards them. She wasn’t as excited about this development as Roseluck was.
“Hey girls!” Roseluck shouted at them waving even more vigorously. The plates on her back shifted and wobbled a little, causing the mare to tense up and hold stock still. After a couple of charged seconds, the plates stayed exactly where they were perched. Roseluck heaved a huge sigh of relief, but then she began to chuckle nervously to herself. She was all smiles again in a second. “Wow, that was almost a complete disaster! Ah-ha-ha!” Her wooden laugher denoted a bout of paranoia coming along, but Roseluck managed to shake it off.
“Yeah… that was close,” Rainbow Dash said, but not about the plates.
“Well, I’ll see you inside!” Roseluck said, having returned to a safe state of mind. She went into the barn, careful not to disturb the plates again. The past few weeks had been very stressful for her, so there was nopony who could blame her for freaking out a little. It was either that or everypony was too afraid to blame her.
“Well, look who it is.”
Rainbow Dash turned around again. Lily and Daisy had made it to the barn, but for some reason they’d taken time out to stop and acknowledge Rainbow Dash. It was no secret that the three of them were only being civil for Roseluck’s sake, but Roseluck wasn’t around at the moment.
“Good to see you again, ladies.” Rainbow Dash wasn’t about to cause a scene either way, not with Taboo around.
“Yeah, look… we need to talk to you… privately,” Daisy said, getting right to the point. She neither looked nor sounded very excited about this upcoming conversation.
Rainbow Dash couldn’t possibly imagine what they wanted, but somehow she didn’t see them stuffing her in a burlap sack and shipping her off to the badlands. If they wanted to talk, she could talk. She turned to Thunderhead, who had been silently watching from the side of the barn.
“Mind watching her for a sec?” she asked, gesturing to Taboo with a tilt of her head.
“Of course not.” Thunderhead said with a salute, which he realized he didn’t have to do. This mare didn’t outrank him, even if it felt like that from time to time. Rainbow Dash let Taboo off her back and set her in front of the barn door.
“Head on in with Thunderhead, alright? I’ll be there in a moment. Behave yourself.”
“Okay,” Taboo said with her little brow furrowed, as if she understood the gravity of the situation. She spun herself around and trotted into the barn, but she stopped once she got inside. She looked over her shoulder at Thunderhead. “Let’s go!”
“Yes ma’am.” Thunderhead threw another salute, and it suddenly hit him that he really was the lowest rung on the ladder. He grunted internally and followed the filly’s order to enter the barn. The three mares were left by themselves for the time being. They meandered towards the side of the barn, so as not to be disturbed.
“What do you want to talk about?” Rainbow Dash asked, trying to be patient with the pair. Lily and Daisy shared a brief glance before either one spoke up.
“Listen, I know we all agreed to play nice for Roseluck’s sake, but we’ve changed our minds.”
“What?”
“We’re saying we don’t want to put up with this anymore,” Daisy said, clarifying their new position. “Roseluck is our good friend, so we can forgive her for her momentary lapse of judgment. You, however, are not our friend. We’d rather you take your freaky kid and fly back to your little cloud.”
“Are you serious?” Rainbow Dash snapped at the pair. “The wedding is in less than a week and you just now decided this?”
“We were against it from the start. It’s just high time we put our hooves down,” Daisy responded, but she didn’t get at the heart of the issue. Nevertheless, Rainbow Dash could tell they weren’t about to stand around and justify themselves.
“And exactly what do you propose we do?” she asked. There was something very specific they wanted, or else they wouldn’t have called her out. If it was a simple arrangement, they wouldn’t have to hold a secret meeting in the dark. No, it was obvious to Rainbow Dash that this wasn’t going to be a clean deal.
“It’s not us who have to do anything,” Lily told her, stepping up to the pegasus. “You’ve got to tell Roseluck you can’t go to the wedding.”
“But I can go to the wedding… and I plan on going to the wedding,” Rainbow Dash told them just as clearly as she could. Even so, she knew what was coming next just as it came, word by word.
“We’re not asking you, we’re telling you. Don’t come to the wedding.” Daisy put it in the simplest terms possible. “Just break it gently to Roseluck, for her sake.”
“I think it would be better if I went for her sake,” Rainbow Dash retorted, taking a step into her aggressors. “She asked me to come, to be a bridesmaid. Roseluck has been a good friend to me, so I want to return the favor. I’m going to the wedding.”
“Have you considered the trouble you’re putting her through?” Daisy asked, but Rainbow Dash didn’t understand. It showed on her face, so Daisy went on to clarify. “This isn’t a little affair with your friends. Lots of ponies from Big Macintosh’s family and Roseluck’s family are going to be there, and we don’t want to see an uproar because somepony has to drag along that little monster.”
“You don’t know that Taboo is going to cause any trouble,” Rainbow Dash replied, refusing to yield. “Big Macintosh’s parents have been nothing but accepting of Taboo thus far, and Roseluck herself accepted Taboo as well.”
“Yeah, but they’re so weird,” Lily said. “Not everypony is going to be as eccentric as they are.”
“And not everypony will be as bigoted as you are!” Rainbow Dash wasn’t going to take another moment of this conversation. It was ridiculous to even conceive of it in the first place. She drew herself up to her full height and flared her wings out, dwarfing the other two mares before her. “If Roseluck doesn’t want me or Taboo at her wedding, then she can tell me herself!”
“Excuse me, Rainbow Dash?”
Without so much as a word of warning, Roseluck appeared from the light pouring out of the barn door. With a grave look on her face, she made a beeline for Rainbow Dash.
“Uh, hey Roseluck. Need something?”
“Rainbow Dash, you need to get your guest out of there.”
“I… what?” Rainbow Dash’s brain came to a screeching halt. She couldn’t believe that Roseluck was asking what she was asking. It just wasn’t possible, but the words came out of her mouth nonetheless. Still, she couldn’t believe it. “I need to… do what?”
“It’s turning into a riot in there,” Roseluck explained, the urgency rising in her voice. “I thought it would be okay, but I guess I was wrong. I should have realized right from the start…”
“You… you can’t be serious.” Panic and betrayal rose in Rainbow Dash’s chest, unbearable in magnitude; however, she didn’t freeze up. If that’s how it was, that’s the way it was going to be. She steeled herself and ran right past Roseluck. She didn’t matter anymore. Rainbow Dash only needed to worry about Taboo. She burst into the barn, ready to rescue her daughter from the clutches of a beast.
“That won’t do! You’ve gotta make an honest mare out of her!”
“What excuse do y’all have? If’n yer a real stallion, you’d take responsibility!”
“It’s no more bein’ a deadbeat for you, sonny! Fatherin’ will set you straight!”
In the middle of the barn, Thunderhead was surrounded by what looked like seven or eight Apple Family matriarchs, Poison Apple included. The poor stallion looked completely flummoxed, unable to answer for the accusations that were flying about his head from the multitude of mares.
“Poison saw him with Taboo,” Roseluck explained, walking up behind Rainbow Dash. “I noticed that she was being a little confrontational, but I thought he could explain himself. Unfortunately, I underestimated the power of old mares.”
“Such a wretched stallion! Livin’ like a bachelor while this poor mare raises his child!”
“You should be right ashamed, you rake!”
“He’s probably got a whole mess of mares back in Canterlot!”
“For shame!”
“Is this really happening?” Rainbow Dash asked, her panic having somewhat receded. In contrast to what she thought was happening, this was humorous in comparison. “He’s supposed to have a backbone.” In the dense mass of shouting mares, Rainbow Dash noticed she didn’t see Taboo. A closer look revealed that the foal was indeed present, but not where Rainbow Dash expected her to be.
“Don’t you wish he was ‘round more, Taboo?”
“Yeah, he should come more!” Taboo shouted at the poor guard, who was secretly cut deep by the little filly’s scolding. “He only comes during bedtime when I’m asleep, but he should come in the day too and play with me!”
“Oh, y’all hear that? He still visits her durin’ the night!”
“Scandalous! How dare you use that mare in such a way!”
“Such a scoundrel!”
“Oookay, break it up ladies!” Rainbow Dash shouted at the rabble. All the mares nearly jumped out of their bonnets when she appeared, but one party was glad to see her.
“Hi mommy!” Taboo waved and smiled at her mother. “I was on my best behavior!”
“… Yes, I can see that,” Rainbow Dash said, certain that all the bad behavior was coming from the older folks. She gave them a stern look and made sure she had their attention. “He has nothing to do with this.”
“But the resemblance is uncanny!” Poison retorted, pointing at the two ponies in question. “You see, right here. They’ve got the same nose! I’ve got an eye for finding family relations.”
“… And tell me again which cousin of your husband’s Taboo looked like?”
“Well… that was an honest mistake any mare could make.” Despite her best efforts, Poison couldn’t recover from this blunder. The other mares, having realized they just wasted their time chastising a faultless stallion, just rolled their eyes and dispersed. Only Thunderhead and Poison remained with Taboo.
“Ugh, sorry about that Roseluck,” Rainbow Dash said. She was apologizing for more than just the misunderstanding, but there was no need to bring that up. “I’m here now, so you can go do guard stuff elsewhere, Thunderhead.”
“With pleasure,” Thunderhead said, getting out of the mother infested barn just as fast as he could manage. His haste was a bit improper, but there is only so much a stallion can put up with.
“I told Mac it was a bad idea to have so many of his aunts at the rehearsal dinner,” Roseluck said, as if she knew something like this would happen. “Excuse me ladies, I’m going to go give him a piece of my mind.” Roseluck trotted off to where the stallions were standing around drinking, leaving Rainbow Dash and Taboo alone with Poison Apple.
“I’m sorry for all the trouble I caused,” the older mare said, offering up an earnest apology. “Junior and Jackie didn’t exactly explain the whole situation with you and Taboo very well, but I think I get it now.”
“As long as you don’t terrorize my night guard anymore, I’m willing to forgive you,” Rainbow Dash said, not about to hold a grudge against Applejack’s mom.
“Well then, I’d better go chastise my son too,” Poison said, taking her leave.
For her part, Rainbow Dash was just glad everything had ended well. No matter what Daisy and Lily said, she wasn’t going to miss this wedding for the world. Taboo wasn’t going to miss it either. The rest of the dinner went well, aside from two mares delaying the event by showing up late.
“I don’t see you on the list.”
“I am the Mare of Honor!” Daisy shouted at the guard, who refused to budge from in front of the barn door. “Besides, you don’t even have a list!”
“I don’t see why that’s a problem,” Thunderhead said, staring straight ahead with a stoic expression. As part of the royal guards, he had to master holding this face no matter how amused he was. “I can’t let you into the rehearsal dinner if your names aren’t on the list.”
“Yeah, really funny!” Lily tried to move past the guard, but he shot his wing out and blocked her. She tried the other side, but was met with the same result. “Alright, that’s enough! Let us in you idiot!”
“We know you’re doing this because you’re in league with that monster and her keeper,” Daisy said, sparing no expense to make her animosity known. “I guess all you freaks have to stay together. Who do you think you are?”
“Sergeant Thunderhead of the Night Patrol.”
“They’d make a bumbling pile of ugly like you a sergeant?” Lily laughed and turned to her friend. “He thinks just because he plays dress up in a suit of armor that he’s better than us.”
“You’re a fine example of why we shouldn’t bother with that little freak,” Daisy said, getting as close to the guard as she dared. “If she’s going to grow up to be a pompous sack of manure like you, she would have been better of left in the forest by herself.”
“Your own mother must be awful proud of you, sticking up for your fellow freaks of nature.” Lily stepped up to the plate as well, joining in on the assault. “Or did your mommy abandon you too? Celestia if I had a foal like that, I’d leave it in some remote corner of the Everfree too.”
“That might be… but your names still aren’t on the list.”
It had never been so hard for Thunderhead to keep his composure, especially with all the crazy, whacked out things these mares were saying to and about him. He wanted to laugh or at least snicker a little, but he had to maintain the façade of a guard. If it weren’t for his occupation, he probably would have clouted these two mares over the head and then spooked them off. He grew up with an older sister, so it wasn’t in his nature to feel any pity for using force against the fairer sex.
It wasn’t his place to pass down punishment on these mares, so when he was satisfied with the chaos he’d caused he just stepped aside and let them in. The mares were anything but grateful, but he didn’t want their gratitude. All he wanted was to see the good guys have a little victory from time to time.
“Last call everypony. For just one bit you can have a little dance with the bride or groom! This is the last ten minutes, so dig deep folks! Their honeymoon is riding on this!”
Based on the long line of male cousins, uncles and friends lined up to dance with Big Macintosh, a pony might assume that fact were true. For some reason the thought of forcing Big Macintosh to dance with them was absolutely hilarious. The fact that the moon was up and the alcohol was mostly down, there was no surprise there. While Roseluck danced with Big Apple, who paid a generous sum to make sure he got the last dance, Big Macintosh worked on whittling down the line of strange smelling stallions.
Rainbow Dash had already paid for and taken her dance with Big Macintosh as well as a dance with Roseluck for Taboo. Now she was taking the time to relax a little, which was greatly needed since she had spent the majority of the day in a dress.
Taboo, on the other hoof, was taking being in a dress in stride. Despite the late hour, she was bright eyed and bushy tailed. The whole affair of the wedding had been a new and exciting experience for her, but unfortunately her mommy wouldn’t tell her when the next wedding was. It seemed unfair that she had to wait a whole year for her birthday party already, so why wasn’t anypony planning the next wedding already? Taboo even offered to get married, but mommy shut her down immediately.
“Well, this has certainly been a nice night,” Fluttershy said, sitting down with Rainbow Dash and Taboo at their table. Even this modest mare had a drink, but only one and only a very small one. Even so, the placebo effect had her smiling and flushed in the face. “I hope my wedding is this nice.”
“Are you getting married?!” Taboo shouted, excited as anypony could be about the prospect. “When? Wheeen?”
“Well… I don’t know when. I should probably find a special somepony first,” Fluttershy responded, deflating Taboo’s dream in one blow. “Oh, but maybe if I catch the bouquet I can speed up the process!”
“Fluttershy, that’s just a superstition,” Rainbow Dash said to her friend, dismissing the old notion that the mare who makes the catch is the next bride.
“Mommy, what’s a super stitch son?”
“It’s something only crazy ponies believe in.” Rainbow Dash wasn’t exactly sure what to say beyond that. “Anyway, I think you’re better off following your first plan, Fluttershy.”
“I can’t give up without trying!” Fluttershy was determined, spurred on by the three sips of champagne she had. The first two sips were for toasting the bride and groom, but the third sip was because Fluttershy had been feeling a little crazy tonight. She was in the perfect mood to put her faith in superstition.
“What aren’t we giving up on?” Rarity asked, appearing from the bar to sit down with her friends. The unicorn was obviously a bit drunk, but only a proper amount of drunk. She was buzzed at the least.
“Fluttershy is going to catch the bouquet,” Rainbow Dash explained.
“And then I’ll get married!” Fluttershy declared without hesitation. She giggled to herself, overcome with inebriated joy.
“Not before I do,” Rarity said, confronting her friend. “I caught the bouquet at Cadence’s wedding, so I’m getting married first!”
“And who’s going to marry you? Pokey Pierce?” Rainbow Dash smirked at her, but the unicorn had drunk enough not to put up with any talk like that.
“Sure, I’ll marry him! Why not? He’s an upstanding stallion. I’ll even give him a raise so he can afford to buy me an enormous ring,” Rarity said, perfectly serious too; however, she suddenly felt like drinking just a little more. She resisted the urge, vying to be a lady. “It’s a shame he hasn’t got the stomach to ask me.”
“I wish I had somepony who wanted to marry me.” Fluttershy began to pout, soberly realizing how far-fetched her dream was. “I’m just too shy, aren’t I? I’ve got to be more outgoing!” Fluttershy had been telling herself her whole life, so it wasn’t clear to anypony why saying it right now would change anything.
“Alright ladies, it looks like the groom is finally finished with your husbands and coltfriends. It’s getting late, so we’re gonna be taking it slow for a little while. Grab a partner and head for the dancefloor, if your hooves aren’t in danger of falling off.”
“Rarity!” Pierce appeared behind the trio of mares as if he’d been waiting for this exact moment to arrive. “Let’s go dance.”
“Hmm, are you sure you want to dance with little ‘ol me?” Rarity played coy, but she wasn’t the only one with liquid courage running through her body. Pierce swept her up and onto the dance floor, taking her uncommitted protesting all the while.
“Oh… Rarity is so lucky,” Fluttershy put her chin on the table and just watched the dance floor fill up with couples.
“E-excuse me!” A voice with an incredibly noticeable crack almost inaudibly called for the table’s attention. The two and a half mares turned to see a very flushed and very nervous Time Turner staring at the ground in front of Fluttershy. He managed to rigidly lift his head to look her in the eye before offering her a stiff hoof. “D-dance?” he asked.
Having been a wallflower from pretty much the day she was born, Fluttershy had never even been asked to slow dance by a stallion before this exact moment. Most mares would be overjoyed to finally be taken off the proverbial wall, but it frightened Fluttershy to no end; however, she recalled that third sip she took and her extremely recent promise to be more outgoing. She took a deep breath to focus herself, letting it out slowly. Fluttershy smiled just as naturally as anypony would.
“That would be lovely,” she said like a mare who had done this a thousand times yet never got tired of it. She took Time Turner’s hoof and dragged his stiff posterior to the dancefloor. This left Rainbow Dash alone with Taboo, but she didn’t mind so much. It wasn’t like anypony was clamoring to ask her to dance anyway.
“Well, isn’t this a sight?”
Rainbow Dash looked up, surprised to see Thunderhead standing next to the table. It wasn’t so shocking that he was around as it was that he had initiated conversation of his own volition. He was usually so uptight when on duty.
“What’s a sight?” Rainbow Dash asked, turning away and looking back at the dancefloor. Time Turner was looking like an absolute wreck, staring at his hooves while Fluttershy lead him with a gentle smile. Pierce and Rarity were nearbly, slowly rocking close together to the dulcet tones ebbing from the speakers.
“Nothing, I guess,” Thunderhead said, but with a small chuckle. Rainbow Dash turned back to look and was shocked to see him smiling. For some reason, he was acting out of character. It was freaking Rainbow Dash out.
“What’re you so happy about? Aren’t you on duty?”
“Only sort of,” he said, tapping his chin with a hoof. “Can’t a guy enjoy his job?”
Rainbow Dash really didn’t have any ground to disagree with what he was doing. As long as he was around and keeping an eye out, she couldn’t say he wasn’t doing his job.
“Anyway, dancefloors are kind of my weakness. Any takers?” he asked.
“Yeah, don’t think so,” Rainbow Dash replied, dismissing him with a wave of her hoof.
“Well, how about you, Taboo?”
“Yes, please!”
“H-huh? What?”
Rainbow Dash wanted to protest, but it was already too late. Her daughter was heading out towards the dance floor with her guard. Again, Rainbow Dash had no ground to protest this. She let out a sigh and slouched back in her chair. Now she really was alone.
For some reason, she was now overly aware of how many ponies were together on the dance floor. Aside from the pairs she had already noted, she could see Big Macintosh and Roseluck in the center, gazing into each other’s eyes. Roseluck was stunning in her wedding dress and even Big Macintosh cut a dashing form in a tuxedo. Twilight was dancing with Spike, who looked just a little resistant to the idea, and Pinkie Pie was dancing with Braeburn who had come all the way from Appleloosa for the wedding. Even Applejack was sharing a dance with her father at the moment, but Rainbow Dash didn’t have anypony. For the first time in perhaps her entire life, Rainbow Dash found herself feeling jealous for her lack of companionship. If her mother was present, there would have been a whole symphony of I-told-you-so’s.
“Oh, where’s Taboo?” Poison asked, approaching Rainbow Dash and distracting her from the dancefloor. The pegasus pointed to the dancefloor where Thunderhead was teaching Taboo how to dance. “Aww, how precious.”
“Yeah, well, I guess.”
“Hmm, is somepony jealous?” Poison Apple, like many mothers, had a knack for picking up on this sort of thing. Rainbow Dash tried to look like she wasn’t listening, but Poison kept right on talking. “I don’t know what you’ve got to complain about. If I had a cute little filly like that, I would be spending every moment spoiling her. I guess I’ll just to wait for Junior to give me a grandchild.”
“You really like foals, don’t you?” Rainbow Dash asked, starting to pick up a pattern with this mare.
“Who doesn’t?” Poison looked seriously concerned about her question, as if she couldn’t imagine a pony so hardened that a foal’s smile couldn’t warm their heart. Rainbow Dash could rattle off two ponies who at least didn’t like Taboo, who she realized were both dancing with their special someponies at the moment. “My, my… you really are jealous.”
“I am not jealous!” Rainbow Dash wasn’t about to admit it, but she was burning up inside. She just went back to watching Taboo and Thunderhead have the time of their lives. It went on for a song or two, but when the third song started Taboo broke off all of a sudden. Rainbow Dash couldn’t tell what was being said, but Taboo was jumping up and down. After a few seconds of talking with the guard she darted back to Rainbow Dash with Thunderhead in tow.
“I’m tired, so you dance with him,” she said, grabbing her mother’s hoof to pull her out of the chair.
“Huh, why do I have to?” Rainbow Dash protested, despite practically jumping out of her seat.
“Just do it!” the filly demanded, tugging her mother towards Thunderhead.
“Yes, go enjoy yourself,” Poison said. “Don’t worry, I’ll keep an eye on the little one for you.”
“Go!” Taboo switched from pulling her foreleg to pushing her hind leg with her head. Rainbow Dash stood next to Thunderhead, who just grinned and shrugged at her. “Go, go!”
“Alright, alright bossy-pants.” Rainbow Dash grabbed Thunderhead and steered him to the edge of the dance floor. When they got there, she spun around and faced him. Thus, they silently began to dance. Now that she was here, Rainbow Dash wasn’t sure why she wanted to do this.
“So… you look nice tonight,” Thunderhead said, breaking the ice.
“Thanks, you too,” Rainbow Dash responded out of reflex.
“Yeah, well… I guess I never thought I’d wear this to a wedding,” Thunderhead said, looking back at his armor. “It’s certainly different than I normally look.”
“Right, sorry.”
“Don’t worry about it. You’ve got enough on your plate.”
It got quiet again after that; however, Rainbow Dash realized she really didn’t know a lot about this guard even though he was pretty much constantly around. She didn’t even know what he actually looked like. Still, she was able to pinpoint exactly why she was able to trust him.
“You really like Taboo, don’t you?”
“Ah, I… gueeess you could say she’s grown on me.” He looked up and away at the ceiling.
“Just admit it. You seem to like her a lot more than the day guard.” Rainbow Dash smirked up at him, but Thunderhead suddenly looked a lot more serious
“What? Does he not like her or something?” Thunderhead asked, his eyes alight with anger. “If he’s giving you trouble-”
“He’s not giving me trouble,” Rainbow Dash assured him before he completely flipped his lid. She hadn’t expected such a heated reaction from him. Despite his reluctance to say it outright, there was no doubt in Rainbow Dash’s mind that he was fond of the little filly. “I’m just saying that you take your job a lot more seriously than he does.”
“Yeah, but it’s an important job,” Thunderhead said, looking at the ceiling again. He hadn’t meant to let his emotions get the best of him right then. “Anyway, I’ve never really sat down and talked to the guy. Our schedules aren’t exactly compatible.”
“You’re not missing out on anything,” Rainbow Dash told him. “He’s just kind of typical for a guard. He just stands around looking serious.”
“Ah, that sounds totally different from what I do.”
“Do you not take compliments or what?” Rainbow Dash asked.
“Thank you.”
“See, that’s better,” Rainbow Dash said, leaning into him and relaxing on his chest. It took her a few seconds to realize she was doing it, but once she did she stopped immediately. She didn’t do or say anything more, but she looked up at Thunderhead. She was relieved so see he didn’t look like he minded.
“Alright ladies and gentlecolts, it’s about time the bride threw that bouquet. All you unmarried mares get on the floor. Gentlecolts, make sure you pay attention because the groom will be throwing the garter next and you might just end up with one of these fine mares.”
“Thanks for the dance,” Rainbow Dash said, bowing to her partner.
“You’re welcome,” he said, departing from the dance floor after a bow of his own. Rainbow Dash stayed as per the request of the DJ, but she really wasn’t committed to catching the bouquet. After tonight, however, she had to admit her mother and father had a valid point about her finding somepony. Even if she wasn’t ready to go on the market, she resigned herself to at least not turn her nose up at the prospect. Nevertheless, she left the desperate superstition of the bouquet to the other mares.
Fluttershy managed to catch it, but then Pierce caught the garter. Rarity looked like she was going to murder somepony when the DJ made the two catchers dance together. It didn’t help that Taboo kept asking if and when they were getting married. All in all, it was a pretty good night in Rainbow Dash’s book.
6
“And you’re going to keep both eyes on them?” Mrs. Cake asked, looking Pinkie dead on.
“I promise!”
“And you won’t get distracted by all the candy?” Mr. Cake asked, bumping aside his wife to stare down Pinkie as well.
“No problem-o!”
“You won’t get too excited about pranks and leave them?”
“Or get scared by something and leave them?”
“Nope aaaaaand nope!”
“And you’re absolutely sure?” the pair asked in unison.
“Don’t even worry about it!” Pinkie Pie said, keeping her perpetual smile on her face. “You two just focus on catering for the Town’s Nightmare Night party! Pumpkin and Pound are in good hooves! You can trust me!”
The Cakes had a bit of trouble trusting somepony dressed up as a mad scientist, especially when considering that mad scientist was Pinkie Pie. She pulled the look off just a little too well. Pinkie Pie’s attire aside, the Cakes didn’t have much of a choice. Their children wanted to trick or treat, but they had already promised to cater the town’s Nightmare Night party. Thankfully, Pinkie Pie came to the rescue once again and eagerly offered to take the twins with her. Even if she was their trusted foalsitter, going out on Nightmare Night was a totally different beast.
They looked down at their kids, adorably dressed up as a carton of chocolate and strawberry milk. Between the eager looks on their faces and the eager look on Pinkie Pie’s face, they just couldn’t say no; however, they could say all kinds of other things.
“Just don’t do anything crazy, alright?” Mr. Cake said, giving his go ahead for the plan at long last.
“You can count on me, Mr. Cake! I’ll have them back here with plenty of candy and in once piece!” Pinkie Pie assured him, picking up the milk cartons and starting towards the door. The sun was going down, which meant the time to trick or treat was upon them. The three ponies trotted out the door and closed it firmly behind them.
Sure they weren’t being followed, Pinkie Pie led them away from Sugarcube Corner. She trotted briskly, almost leaving the twins behind. They were confused as to why they hadn’t immediately gone and knocked on their neighbor’s door, but it was far beyond them to argue with the undisputed master of trick or treating. They walked and walked until they were at Carousel Boutique, which seemed like an odd place to start.
Pinkie Pie knocked on the door three times in succession, stopped, and then knocked twice hard. After a few seconds, the door opened up. Instead of Rarity like the twins expected, they were greeted by Rainbow Dash instead.
“Hi Dashie! I’m here to pick her up!”
“She’s almost ready,” Rainbow Dash said, but just then Equestria’s tiniest hazmat worker appeared behind her.
“I am ready!” Taboo shouted.
“Well, I’m not ready!” Rainbow Dash retorted. She pulled Pinkie Pie inside and set her square in front of her. “Now Pinkie, I trust you’re going to keep a constant eye on her, right?”
“I promise!”
“And you’re not gonna get wrapped up in all the candy?”
“No problem-o!”
“And you’re not gonna go pranking or getting pranked and accidentally leave her behind?”
“Nope aaaaaand nope!”
“And you’re absolutely sure?” she asked.
“Don’t even worry about it!” Pinkie Pie put her foreleg around her friend and pulled her close. “It’s the perfect plan, Dashie. I take Taboo and the twins out trick or treating and you can enjoy the Nightmare Night party in town! Everypony wins!”
“Only if this goes off without a hitch,” Rainbow Dash reminded her. “The Cakes won’t be happy to know we’re going behind their backs like this.”
“But they’ll neeever know!” Pinkie Pie told her. “That’s the beauty of it! Especially with a costume like that, nopony will even know it’s her. You chose well, Dashie.”
“Actually, I didn’t pick it,” Rainbow Dash said, looking down at Taboo in her interesting getup.
“I work in the dump!” Taboo shouted as to be heard under her fume mask. Pinkie Pie gave Rainbow Dash a concerned look, indicating that something about what was going on here was waaay off.
“Hey, I’m still getting over the shock that they make these things in her size,” Rainbow Dash told her friend. “Like you said, the costume works. I can’t figure out why or how she thought of it.”
“I already told you,” Taboo said, scolding her own mother. She had explained this like a million times now. “It’s really scary!”
Both Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie had to admit that there was something macabre and unsettling about a foal in a hazmat suit and fume mask. It did cover up her wings, eyes, and ears, so Rainbow Dash went along with the idea. Still, Taboo’s constant insistence that “it’s really scary” was starting to freak her out just as much.
“Are we really going to be trick or treating together?” Pumpkin asked with a huge smile across her face. Without waiting for confirmation, she ran up to Taboo and wrapped her in a huge hug. “This is going to be so much fun!”
“You two aren’t going to take all the candy, are you?” Pound asked.
“Don’t worry! There’ll be plenty of candy for everypony!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed, scooping up all three young ponies at once. “Now we’re already behind schedule, so let’s get moving!” The mare started wobbling off on her hind legs, not thinking to put her load down to let it move on its own.
“Bye Mommy!” Taboo waved to her mother when Pinkie happened to spin around and totter backwards for a moment. Rainbow Dash waved back, still feeling apprehensive about the whole thing. It was her own selfish wish to be able to go to the Nightmare Night festivities, an event she enjoyed immensely. Her friends had encouraged her to let Pinkie Pie take Taboo for the night. Now that it was all coming together, Rainbow Dash didn’t feel any less worried. Perhaps it was just part of the territory.
“Rainbow Dash?” Rarity asked from inside the Boutique. “Are you done saying good-bye yet?”
“Yeah, yeah, I’m done,” she replied, closing the door to the Boutique. She went back inside and joined her friends, who were all getting into their costumes. The festive atmosphere of the room made her feel a lot more at ease about the situation. She released a held breath and rejoined the group. “I’m ready for my costume.”
“What’re you goin’ as anyway?” Applejack asked, standing about in her Timberwolf costume. Recent events had convinced her that they were pretty darn scary. On top of that, a costume made entirely out of odd sticks was pretty inexpensive. “Don’t say as a Shadowbolt again.”
“Fine, then I won’t say it,” Rainbow Dash said, sticking her tongue out at Applejack. She stepped up on the catwalk and posed for those around her. “There isn’t a better costume out there.”
“Actually, Rainbow Dash, I’m with Applejack on this one,” Twilight said. She herself had opted not to dress as Starswirl the Bearded for the first time in years, but only because she had wings now. She couldn’t be authentic if she had wings. Instead, she put on a pith helmet and masqueraded as Daring Do. The helmet covered her horn, so there was no damage to the authenticity. “Why not dress as something else this year? It isn’t too late.”
“Twilight is right. We’re all trying new things this year,” Rarity said, emerging from behind the panel with Rainbow Dash’s costume. “Why, even Fluttershy has offered to accompany us out tonight.”
Everypony turned their attention to the timid pegasus, who for the first time in her entire life was outside her house for Nightmare Night. Even if she was wearing a full suit of armor with the visor down and shut tight, it wasn’t because she was in the spirit.
“Oh, well… Turner invited me out, so I didn’t want to say no,” Fluttershy said, her voice actually magnified by the resonance of the armor. “I can go out… for a second or two.”
“Yes, that stallion has had all sorts of good effects on you,” Rarity said. She turned back to Rainbow Dash and threw the costume at her. “In light of all this, I’ve already prepared a different costume for you.”
Rainbow Dash unraveled the costume and examined it. It sure wasn’t a Shadowbolt uniform, that much was clear. She looked it over a little more until she realized what it was.
“Gee… this is nice and all, but I think I’d better stick with Shadowbolt,” Rainbow Dash said, tossing the costume back to her friend. Rarity caught it with her magic and sent it right back, not about to take no for an answer.
“Put it on and then we’ll talk.”
Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes and complied, stepping into her costume. It was a bit tight, but that was to be expected. When she was in, Rarity zipped up the back and slapped a pair of goggles over her eyes. Rainbow Dash turned and looked at herself in the mirror.
“I don’t know how I feel about wearing this… it feels like bad mojo.” Rainbow Dash didn’t know how Rarity pulled it off, but she was wearing the most perfect replica of a Wonderbolt flight uniform she had ever seen. The material wasn’t accurate, but the appearance was spot on. “I don’t think I should be wearing it…”
“Nonsense, Rainbow Dash!” Rarity said, stepping up behind her friend to see her reflection as well. “You’d better get used to this look, if you ask me. The day you’ll be a Wonderbolt is closer than it’s ever been!”
“… I don’t know…”
“Oh, just be quiet,” Rarity said, turning Rainbow Dash away from the mirror. “If it feels too weird seeing yourself in it, then don’t look at yourself. Just let the other ponies look at you. Use this night to remind them who you are! You’re Rainbow Dash, the best flier in all of Equestria! You’ll be a Wonderbolt and everypony won’t be able to pick up a magazine without seeing your face. Trust me, it’s time to stop being a Shadowbolt.”
For some reason, Rarity was getting a little too into this costume thing. At any rate, Rainbow Dash wasn’t in any position to protest. She had to admit that not having to see herself in the uniform made it a little better, but the fact remained. She knew one day it would be more than just a costume; it would be her job. The situation became a little too real for her. Taboo was out on her own and she was a Wonderbolt. It was feeling less like a costume and more like an unsettling prediction.
She just hoped a night of merriment at the Nightmare Night party would calm her down.
“Trick or Treat!”
“… Pinkie Pie, aren’t you a little old for this?” Cheerilee asked, raising an eyebrow. When the other mare didn’t answer, she just rolled her eyes and hooved over piece of candy. She turned her attention to the little crowd in front of her. “Well, if it isn’t the Cake Twins! Your costumes are just adorable!”
“Thank you,” they said in unison as pieces of candy were plopped into their bags. Cheerilee then turned her attention to the fourth pony on her stoop. She regarded her covered face with an odd look for a long while, just listening to the sound of her breathing through the gas mask.
“Oh… how adorable,” Cheerilee said, but it was clear from her strained speech she didn’t quite mean it. She was confused. Who was this strange filly at her doorstep? Why was she dressed this way? Didn’t the others see her? She thought maybe they couldn’t see her, that this odd filly was really a ghost. She was the ghost of some poor, sad filly who grew up in the deep pits of pollution and vile air, which cut her life tragically short. She passed away writhing in the rancid poison and discarded trash of a town just like this one. Now her resentful soul wanders this mortal plane, trying to blend in with normal children in order to live out the life she never got to have!
“Just take it!” Cheerilee threw two generous hooffuls of candy into Taboo’s bag and then frantically slammed the door to her house shut. Several locks clicked into place. Taboo looked down at her rapidly expanding haul of candy and smiled. The group picked up their bags and headed to the next house with Taboo leading the way with a spring in her step.
“Pinkie, why does that keep happening?” Pumpkin asked, whispering as not to be heard by Taboo. “It’s starting to scare me…”
“It’s Nightmare Night; you’re supposed to act scared,” Pound said, not worrying about being heard. He thought the whole thing was ridiculous. “There’s nothing weird about what’s happening.”
The group came a halt as a stallion dressed up as a construction worker passed in front of them. He glanced down and noticed Taboo, bringing him to a sudden halt. As he stared at her, his eyes grew wide and beads of sweat rolled down the side of his head. He backed away slowly, not taking his eyes off of Taboo.
“I-I never littered in my life! It wasn’t me! I didn’t do it!” He ran off in a completely different direction than before, screaming all the way. Taboo just continued on like nothing special had happened, but the other three ponies weren’t so eager to follow her. They crowded together and inched forward bit by bit, terrified of what might happen next.
“Boo!”
“Eeeep!” Fluttershy bolted headfirst into Turner, bowling him over for the umpteenth time this evening. The poor stallion had been steamrolled by the iron mare so many times the others were considering taking him to Ponyville General to see if he had a concussion. Rainbow Dash just laughed and laughed as usual, entertained to no end by her own shenanigans.
“Oh, I’m sorry Turner!” Fluttershy said, realizing once again that Rainbow Dash had just gotten the best of her. She pulled the stallion to his feet and dusted off his costume again, which didn’t look quite as princely as it once had.
“Rainbow Dash, would you knock that off?” Twilight said, finally fed up with her. “You’ve been scaring the living daylights out of Fluttershy all night!”
“What? All I did was say ‘Boo!’”
“Eeeeep!”
“It… really doesn’t take much,” Turner said from his place on the ground. Fluttershy apologized and helped him up again while Rainbow Dash laughed.
“This isn’t really behavior fitting of a Wonderbolt,” Twilight said, trying to get an angle to discourage Rainbow Dash. “Can’t you just enjoy the party like everypony else?”
The party was going in full swing, just like every year. Ponies were bobbing for apples and enjoying sweet treats while enjoying the sounds of the local band. The whole town square was decked out in lights and jack-o-lanterns. There were plenty of other games set up along the outskirts, most of them involving throwing something at something else. All of this was available to Rainbow Dash, but instead she was wrapped up in scaring Fluttershy.
“Aw c’mon, Twilight!” Rainbow Dash said, nudging her friend. “What fun is Nightmare Night without some crazy pranks?”
“Have you considered poor Fluttershy?” Twilight said, gesturing to the pegasus in question. She was still apologizing to Time Turner, who was in turn apologizing right back. It was absolutely adorable. Rainbow Dash just snickered to herself.
“She looks like she’s enjoying herself,” she said, but Twilight didn’t look amused.
“Ugh! You’re so inconsiderate, Rainbow Dash!”
“Whoa, don’t know if I deserve that.”
Twilight turned around and came face to face with Rainbow Dash. She was holding a half-eaten cupcake in her hoof and had a giant, stuffed bear on her back. Twilight turned back to Rainbow Dash, who was just standing there smiling. She turned back to Rainbow Dash once more, who was chewing on aforementioned cupcake.
“W-what is going on?” Twilight said, looking back and forth between the two Rainbows. She turned to the one that just arrived and pointed a hoof at her. “Who are you?”
“Uh… I’m Rainbow Dash.” Rainbow Dash threw the rest of her cupcake into her mouth.
“But Rainbow Dash has been right here all night!” Twilight said, throwing both hooves towards the first Rainbow Dash, who smiled and waved. The other Rainbow Dash swallowed her cupcake.
“I’ve been trying to win the Pumpkin toss to get this bear all night. I swear that game is rigged. It took a few tries to win, but I think Taboo will like this!” Rainbow Dash shoved the bear in Twilight’s face. It had a rather serious expression on his face and a blue suit on his body. The strangest part was the scar over his left eye, which seemed wildly out of place on what was supposed to be a cute kid’s toy. “I’ve actually been meaning to ask you who that is,” Rainbow Dash said, putting the strange animal on her back and pointing to the other Rainbow Dash.
“I thought… I thought she was you?” Twilight asked, not sure of anything anymore.
“Well, I guess the jig is up!” the other Rainbow Dash said, but in a familiar, male voice. She snapped her hoof, and in a burst of light and smoke transformed into Discord before everypony’s eyes. “April Fools!” Fluttershy bowled over Time Turner again.
“Discord?” Twilight threw off her helmet and pointed her horn at the draconequus. “What are you doing here?”
“Me? Well, I’m just trying to enjoy Nightmare Night like everypony else!” he said, levitating down to pony level. He snapped his fingers, poofing himself an odd costume comprised of a red shirt with an odd emblem on it. For the avatar of chaos capable of conjuring pretty much anything in an instant, it was underwhelming. “Like I said, what fun is Nightmare Night without some crazy pranks?”
“Have you even ever celebrated Nightmare Night?” Rainbow Dash questioned, taking a stance against him as well.
“Eh… well, not really. This is the first time I didn’t go to Canterlot’s Nightmare Night Garden Party as a statue. By the by, thanks for letting me out, but I feel like we haven’t really hung out since then,” he said, wrapping his arms around Twilight and Rainbow Dash.
“We haven’t,” Twilight reminded him, shouldering off his arm.
“And so much has changed since then!” Discord said, dramatically tilting backwards until his head became buried in the ground. It popped back up as a beautiful red flower between Time Turner and Fluttershy. “For instance, I wasn’t aware my good friend Fluttershy found somepony to make kissy-face with.”
“Oh my, we don’t, we aren’t, we could, b-b-but-”
“She and I, we’re only just, but we, I mean we-”
“Shh!” Discord’s hand sprouted up and snapped its fingers, placing duct tape over both ponies’ mouths. “Forget I said anything and just go back to being adorable.” He pulled the rest of his body out of the ground and brushed the dirt off with Twilight’s tail.
“Hey!”
“Oh, were you using this?” Discord pinned Twilight’s tail back on, smiling innocently. “Look, I just wanted to be in on all the festivities for once. This holiday suits me! The wacky costumes, the free candy, the celebration of the disharmony between my two greatest foes! What’s the harm in me popping by for a round of apple bobbing or two?”
“It might have something to do with the fact that you refer to Princess Celestia and Luna as ‘my two greatest foes,’” Twilight said, pointing an accusing hoof at him. Discord moved to protest, but she did have a point; however, Twilight knew Discord had a point as well. Scaring Fluttershy over and over again wasn’t exactly extremely evil or anything. “… Look, if anything you do gets out of hoof…”
“Oh! Do you mean it?” Discord said, clasping his paw and talon together. He leaned into Twilight and got all doe eyed on her. “Can I reaaaaally wear my dress to the ball?”
“As long as you stay out of trouble!” Twilight said before he could get carried away.
“Well, isn’t this a special day? I have permission from the Princess herself to be at the party!” Discord laughed to himself. He snapped and a scuba mask poofed onto his face. “I think I might actually go bob for apples! I do like those apples.” Discord’s wings began humming as he beat them furiously. Somewhere, a pony could be heard counting down.
“Hold on, buster!” Rainbow Dash shouted. Discord’s wings made an odd popping and grinding sound as he halted his liftoff. He turned to her and folded his arms. There wasn’t much that annoyed him, but having his dramatic exit ruined was one of them. “I need to talk to you alone.”
“Oh boy, a private conference with Rainbow Dash,” Discord said, sounding underwhelmed for the first time tonight. Rainbow Dash couldn’t have cared less. She dragged him away from her friends until they were out of earshot of the party. “Now what is it? Daddy already gave me permission to go and I don’t think she’d like mommy undermining her authority.”
“So you do know what I want.”
“Well, it’s kind of obvious. It would be pretty pointless for me to make an appearance if I didn’t add anything to the main thread of the plot.”
“… What?”
“Just ask your question so we can move along,” Discord said, poofing her a script to read off of. She knocked it aside and flew up to his head.
“Do you know anything about Taboo? Where her parents might be? Where she came from?”
“Can’t say I do,” Discord said, reclining in the air. “I’m the Avatar of Chaos and Disharmony, not of Family Issues. I haven’t the foggiest where the twerp’s parents got off to. Has she considered investing in a leash for them?”
“Okay, so you don’t know anything about her parents, but what about-”
“Her species?” Discord asked. Rainbow Dash grimaced at the word, but she held her tongue. If he had any information, she wanted to get it out of him. “Look, Luna already grilled me on this. I, like you, thought she would have all the answers. Sadly, in all my years in Equestria I’ve never encountered a group of ponies like her. Does that mean a group doesn’t exist? Beats me, but I’ll tell you what I told the Princesses: if more ponies like Taboo exist, they’re not in Equestria.”
“… Really?” Rainbow Dash squinted at Discord.
“I really don’t know. I haven’t done much traveling in all my millennia. I had a country to rule and pigeons to give a place to roost,” Discord explained.
“… Alright, fine. Thanks.”
“Oh? What’s this?” Discord grinned from ear to ear and narrowed his eyes at Rainbow Dash. “You’re thanking me? My, my, this has been quite the interesting day for me!”
“Don’t push your luck,” Rainbow Dash said, backing up from him. Discord, for his part, doubled back and started cackling at the top of his lungs. She wasn’t quite sure what was so funny.
“Ha! Pushing my luck?” He could barely speak between fits of laughter. “You’re right… *snicker*. I’m overdue for something terrible to happen!”
His karma must have heard him, for not a moment later did a streak of blue fly down from the night sky and crack Discord right in the head. The source of the impact bounced off and landed between Rainbow Dash and the draconequus, flaring it’s webbed wings in defense. Discord, however, didn’t look much like a threat as he cycled back and forth on his hoof and claw.
“Oh? Am I turning into a statue again? I’m feelin’ raaather… rocked.” Discord fell in a tangled heap for a short dirt nap.
“Are you alright?” Thunderhead asked, turning back to Rainbow Dash.
“Yeah… not that I was in trouble,” she said, craning her neck around the guard to look at Discord. She kind of felt sorry for him, but she would be lying if she said she hadn’t wanted to do that herself once or twice. “He’s not here to take over Equestria, if that’s what you were thinking.”
“But, that’s Discord!” Thunderhead said as if it weren’t obvious.
“He’s on our side now… kind of. Didn’t you hear?”
“I… guess I didn’t.” Thunderhead looked back at Discord. “Whoops?”
“He’ll be fine,” Rainbow Dash said. “So, you’re telling me you swooped down here thinking you were going to save me from Discord?”
“… Yeeeeah.”
“And your big plan was to hit him on the head?”
“I don’t have much else to work with.”
“I guess it’s the thought that counts,” Rainbow Dash said, turning her back away from Discord and leaving him behind. Thunderhead cast a worried glance at the Avatar of Chaos, but he just ended up assuming he’d probably be fine.
“So where is Taboo?” he asked, forgetting about Discord.
“She’s out Trick or Treating,” Rainbow Dash explained. She stopped and turned to Thunderhead. “Hey, do you think you could do me a favor? I want you to watch Taboo.”
“Yeah, that’s kind of why I’m here.”
“I mean secretly,” Rainbow Dash said, but Thunderhead still raised an eyebrow. “It’s the first time she’s ever been out like this without me. I know she’s with Pinkie Pie and the Cake Twins, but I’m still worried. Having you right next to her might ruin the experience, so just keep an eye on her from the background. I’d just feel a lot better knowing you were there.”
“Well, if that’s an order from a superior officer,” Thunderhead said, throwing her a salute. Rainbow Dash was confused at first, but then she remembered her costume.
“Oh, yeah! Those are your orders, so get to it!” Rainbow Dash said, playing along with the charade.
“Yes, Lieutenant!” Thunderhead put down his salute and spread his wings. He took off into the night to find Taboo.
“C’mon, hurry up Taboo!” Pumpkin called to her friend. “Pinkie says this next house gives out Jumbo Chocolate Bars!”
“I’m coming!” Taboo braced herself and pushed hard against her candy bag. She was glad she’d managed to collect such a large haul, but the unforeseen consequence of this was that it had become a chore to transport from house to house. She pushed and struggled as another group of ponies cantered by. She wasn’t going to get to many more houses tonight at this rate.
Taboo backed up from her bag. She kept going and going until she felt satisfied with the distance. She stared it down, scraping her hoof against the ground. The little filly charged the bag, driving her shoulder into it. The bag flew away as she plopped onto the ground. It slid a whole foot before skidding to a stop. Taboo sighed and stood back up. She would have made more progress if she just kept pushing.
It then struck Taboo that she was alone in the street. She looked down the road where her friends had just been, but now they were nowhere to be seen. Then again, Taboo couldn’t see very far in the darkness with her fume mask on. In order to see a little better, she took off her hood and removed her mask. She shook a little sweat out of her hair and looked about.
There were ponies here, but they were not her friends.
“Hey, look at that!”
A group of three colts who had been walking up the street towards her stopped to examine her. They exchanged looked with one another, trying to confirm if what they were seeing was really what they were seeing. Taboo could tell they were looking at her, but she didn’t like the way they were doing it. As they approached her, she backed up against her back. They were bigger than her and she didn’t know them. All of a sudden, going out without mommy seemed like a really bad idea.
“What’re you doing out here by yourself?” one of the colts asked her, demanding she answer. With the three of them closed in around her, she had nowhere to run. “Did your mommy finally abandon you?”
“No!” Taboo puffed out her chest, despite her heart pounding quickly inside of it.
“Then where is she?” they asked, but Taboo didn’t answer. She just stared down at the ground in front of them. “She did leave you, didn’t she? She finally abandoned you like your real parents!”
“Shut up!” she shouted at them. Taboo had no idea what they were talking about, but she didn’t like it. “Leave me alone!”
“You don’t get to tell us what to do!” The circle of colts began to close in on her. “Somepony needs to teach you a lesson.”
“Hey!”
The circle of colts backed off as the sound of an onlooker caught them by surprise. They looked down the road to see Thunderhead standing and watching them. Taboo turned and saw him as well. She felt herself deflate, realizing she wasn’t alone anymore. All her fear finally caught up to her, and tears began forming in her eyes. In desperation, she cried out for help.
“Daaaaaaddy!”
The three colts retreated, not wanting to deal with the guard. Thunderhead, however, couldn’t move from where he stood. The situation just became a lot more surreal, and he didn’t even snap out of his stupor when Taboo scampered up and glomped his leg. She buried her face into him and sobbed, both hurt by the things those colts had said and glad the ordeal was over.
“Uh… hey, you alright?” Thunderhead asked, trying to act natural. He’d never been called “daddy,” and he most certainly hadn’t woken up this evening anticipating being called that. He wanted to tell Taboo she was confused, but he didn’t. Something was stopping him. He just put a hoof around Taboo, comforting her.
“I wa-as sca-a-ared,” Taboo said between sobs. “It wasn-n’t fun. I wanna go ho-ome!”
“Okay… should we find your mother?” The words almost didn’t come out as Thunderhead stumbled over them. He was all too aware of all the implications of being affectionately “daddy.” His mind was running in a thousand different directions.
“Taboo? Taboo!” Pinkie Pie came bounding around the corner with the Cake twins in tow. When she saw Taboo crying into Thunderhead’s foreleg, she knew she’d screwed up. Pinkie had begun to wonder why there was a lack of sudden panic from the last few houses. It then struck her that she had left the Twins and Taboo somewhere in the dust as she sped off by herself. In the end, she hadn’t kept her promise. She sprinted over to Taboo and slid into the proper pose for groveling. “I am soooooo super sorry, Taboo! I just couldn’t control my sugar craving! I neeeeeed heeelp!”
“We’re sorry, Taboo. We tried to tell her, but she left us behind too,” Pound said, approaching the filly. He kicked the dirt. “Sorry…”
“We were so worried!” Pumpkin ran up and hugged her friend, at least she hugged her as well as she could while wearing a box. “Are you gonna be okay?”
“I’ll be fine,” Taboo said, having managed to calm down a little.
“We can stop if you want,” Pumpkin told her friend, but Taboo shook her head. She didn’t have to be afraid now.
“No, we don’t have to stop,” Taboo said, detaching from Thunderhead. “I just have to find a way to move all this candy around.”
The group took a moment to look at Taboo’s massive bag of candy. They might be able to move at a decent clip if they all worked together, but Taboo knew she would feel guilty about making her friends do that for her.
“I guess I could take it back to your house,” Thunderhead said, offering his services. It went against what he was ordered to do, but as far as he was concerned Taboo outranked Rainbow Dash. She wasn’t an actual Lieutenant, just like he wasn’t an actual “daddy.”
“What would I use to put my candy in?” Taboo asked. Thunderhead thought fast, taking off his helmet and turning it upside down.
“Will this do?”
Taboo took the helmet and examined it. It didn’t look like it would hold very much, especially with the earholes in the bottom. Considering her options, she didn’t know what else could be done.
“Just bring my bag back when you’re done!” Taboo said. She put her fume mask and hood back on, ready to get back to Trick or Treating. “Alright, let’s go!”
“Lead the way!” Pumpkin said, trotting side by side with her friend down the road. Pinkie and Pound caught up with them, and thus the journey resumed. Thunderlane stood beside the candy and watched them go, left alone with his thoughts. He figured he could sort it all out later. It was time for him to do his job.
The target exploded in a flash of fire as the watermelon impacted it.
“Ah ha! I win again!” Discord cheered, party poppers popping out of thin air to announce his seventh consecutive victory at the Pumpkin Toss. “Now can I have a prize?”
“No!” The pony running the game said, glaring at the draconequus.
“Aww, come on! What’s the deal?” Discord said, snapping his fingers. A hoofball helmet and pads appeared on his body, complete with the number fish and “Discord” written on the back. “The ref is biased!”
“Well… you’ve been cheating,” Time Turner said, albeit meekly. He stood by with Fluttershy, who had insisted they keep Discord company. She wasn’t worried about him getting lonely so much as she was worried he might try and overthrow the local government.
“Cheating? Who? Me?” Discord turned on the quiet earth pony. “You can’t prove that.”
“Well… you’ve been catapulting watermelons.”
“I don’t see why that’s such a big deal.”
“And they explode.”
“How dare you. You know my mother exploded.”
“And your catapult is a seal.” Turner looked over at the ocean dwelling mammal, which just smiled and clapped his flippers together. Discord threw it the fish on his uniform and it barked happily.
“I don’t obey the rules, I just make them up,” Discord said, crossing his arms and huffing indignantly. “Besides, this game is rigged anyway. You can’t win unless you employ a little extraneous help.”
“The game isn’t rigged,” Turner said. His confidence was flattened when Discord got right up in his face. He shrunk down under the Avatar of Chaos’s peeved glare.
“Oh? It isn’t is it?”
“The game isn’t rigged!” the pony running it shouted, but Discord snapped his fingers and covered him in mayonnaise.
“Then why don’t you step up and try your hoof?” Discord asked, snapping his fingers again and returning his station back to normal. “If you manage to win, I’ll turn the stuffed bear you earn into a real bear!”
“Why would I want that?”
“What? Don’t like bears or seals? Fluttershy, how can you be with this stallion?” Discord asked, sticking his tongue out.
“Be nice, Discord,” Fluttershy said, surprising him by turning to scolding instead of stuttering.
“Oh! Well, excuse me. I wasn’t aware your costumes weren’t actually ironic.” Discord snapped his fingers, pulling the old switcheroo on the pair. Now Time Turner was wearing a suit of armor while Fluttershy was dressed like a Princess. Fluttershy recoiled from the shock of being exposed to the open air of Nightmare Night so suddenly, prompting Discord to laugh at his handiwork. “There! That’s more like it!”
Time Turner couldn’t see what was going on enveloped in the darkness of the helmet now on his head. He popped it off and looked around. He saw Discord laughing and Fluttershy cowering again. Something snapped inside Time Turner when he saw how uncomfortable Discord was making Fluttershy. He snorted and furrowed his brow.
Discord and Fluttershy stopped what they were doing to notice Time Turner stepping up to the Pumpkin Toss. He looked down the field at his target. He pulled back on the catapult, testing the power of the spring. He got behind it, checking the alignment. He picked up a pumpkin, testing its weight. Satisfied with his observations, he placed the large vegetable on his catapult and got ready to fire.
“Yeah, there’s no way this is happening,” Discord said. He conjured himself a megaphone and got ready to gloat. Fluttershy just watched, secretly rooting for Turner.
The stallion released his catapult, letting the pumpkin soar through the air. Everypony watched as it arced high across the firing range and hit the target right on. There was a moment of silence.
“… Well I’ll be darned,” Discord muttered to himself. “He did it.”
“… I did it.”
“You did it!” Fluttershy tackled Time Turner to the ground, but this time it wasn’t because she was scared. It didn’t hurt him this time either, since he was wearing armor. “You stood up to Discord and you hit the target!”
“O-of course! I make clocks, s-so precision is kind of my, uh, thing.” Being so close to Fluttershy still made him incredibly nervous. “I just wanted him to stop bothering you.”
“You mean… you did it for me?”
“I… I suppose I did,” Turner said, blushing profusely. He did his best to maintain eye contact with Fluttershy, who just stared back down at her. Suddenly, her face broke out in a deep blush and her ears stood straight up. He watched as she got a wild look in her eyes. Before he could ask what was going through her head, she silenced him.
“Oh, ew! Nopony wants to see this!” Discord shouted, dropping his megaphone and shielding his eyes. He quickly removed and swallowed them for safekeeping. He snapped and conjured himself a quill and paper to write on. “Let’s see… how does this go? Dear Princess Celestia, today I learned a valuable lesson. Never make friends because they will get special someponies and they will swap saliva with them in public and it will be nasty and this is what I learned. Please let me rule Equestria again, please. Signed, Discord.”
Discord rolled up the letter, farted out a green flame, and sent it on its way.
“Hmm… maybe I should’ve proofread that first.”
Meanwhile, Fluttershy pulled away from Time Turner, allowing the pair to breathe again. She was fully aware of what she’d done and where she’d done it, and as a result her embarrassment burned her with all the intensity of the sun; however, she felt extremely giddy at the same time. Fluttershy had never kissed a stallion before, but it wasn’t scary at all. In fact, it was a lot of fun.
“Oh, oh my!” Fluttershy couldn’t stop giggling and smiling. “I can’t believe I just did that!”
“Yeah… me neither.” Turner was smiling like an idiot.
“Does this mean you two are going to stop being all embarrassed when I make couple jokes about you two?” Discord asked them, even though he was facing in the wrong direction.
“Yes!” Fluttershy cheered before diving back down, initiating another intense kiss with her now official special somepony.
“Ugh… all this romance is giving me indigestion,” Discord said, holding his stomach. It hissed and snarled back at him. “Or maybe that’s Celestia’s reply. Ooof, I guess she’s not happy about me leaving the castle without permission fro- hnnng… and for rending the drapes, but she knows I get stir-crazy! Well, I’ll just leave you two lovebirds alone. I have to go receive a letter in somepony’s flower bin.”
“Welcome back. Luna. I trust you had a nice time,” Celestia said, looking up from her book. She was surprised to see her sister swoop into the study decked head to hoof in all the swag she’d won during Nightmare Night. This didn’t even include the things she’d simply been given for showing up.
“Those Appleloosans really know how to throw a party! Why, I was having so much fun I almost forgot to lower the moon!” Luna lit her horn and teleported her bounty of paraphernalia to her room. She took out her crown, brushed the sugar off of it, and put it back on her head. “It was another successful Nightmare Night. You should really consider having the citizens hold a holiday in your honor, sister.”
“I do. I have the Summer Sun Celebration.”
“Yes, but it isn’t very festive,” Luna said. “It’s more of a quick ceremony of sorts. Nopony has ever hurled a stuffed spider at a Velcro web in your honor.”
“I’m glad you enjoy your festivities, Luna.” Celestia turned back to her book. “Page please.” A lion’s paw reached down and turned the page for the Princess.
“Well, I’m simply too excited to sleep yet. I think I shall go count my spoils,” Luna said, heading towards the door. “Hello, Discord. In trouble again?” she asked the disembodied head over the doorpost.
“I was just trying to enjoy Nightmare Night,” he said, rolling the one eye he had been allowed to keep inside his skull. “Anyway, my legs have run down to the kitchen. Did you want anything?”
“Just some tea before I go down for the morning.” Luna said, smiling before continuing on. “Door please.” Discord’s talon floated out and opened up the door, allowing the Princess of the Night to pass through. Luna trotted down the hallway with a skip in her step, still bubbling from the night she’d had. She hummed a little tune to herself and continued towards her room.
She stopped halfway. Her keen sense of magic was picking up a dream nearby. The dream could be any of several servants in the castle, but Luna wasn’t content to speculate. If a pony can intrude on a dream, she is always tempted to do so. Usually she refrained and allowed them to have their privacy, but Luna was in a bit of a mischievous mood.
“Perhaps just a peek.” Luna filled her being with magic and stepped into the ethereal plane. She floated down, down into the dreaming pony’s mind. She touched it, letting its gray warmth surround her. She sunk in and beheld the other side.
“Honey, I’m home!” Thunderhead smiled brightly as he passed through the monochrome threshold into his house. He set down his briefcase and hung up his hat.
“Welcome home, honey!” Rainbow Dash said, floating out of the kitchen with oven mitts and an apron on. “I hope you’re hungry!”
“Am I ever!” Thunderhead answered, pumping his hoof in the air.
“Daddy!” Taboo came trotting down the stairs, dressed in a neat gray dress and a grey bow in her hair.
“Hey there, honey!” He opened his hooves up, letting the little filly jump into them. He gave her a big hug and a kiss on the head. “Boy did I miss you, honey!”
“I missed you too, daddy!”
“Hey, don’t I get a kiss, honey?” Rainbow Dash, sauntering up and batting her eyelashes. Thunderhead leaned over and gave her a peck on the cheek.
“How nice it is to come home to my two favorite girls!” All three of them laughed in unison for a few seconds and then abruptly stopped to return to smiling. “So, what’s for dinner?”
“It’s Wheatloaf!” Rainbow Dash announced heading back into the kitchen. “It will be ready soon, honey!”
“Sounds good to me, honey.”
“Daddy! Will you come help me with my homework before dinner?” Taboo asked.
“Sure thing, honey.” Thunderhead began following Taboo up the stairs, but then there was a knock at the door. “Well, who could that be? Head on up, honey. I’ll be there in just a jiffy.” Thunderhead sent Taboo on up without him and went to answer the door. He opened it up, revealing the Princess of the Night with a basket of milk. As an added touch, she was even wearing the appropriate hat.
“Hello Thunderhead.”
“… Well, this is embarrassing.”
“You speak for both of us,” Luna said, having heard the pet name “honey” enough to last her for years to come. “I believe we should have a conversation about all of this.” Luna gestured to the house with her free hoof.
“Yes, your majesty. Should I wake up?”
“No, we will have much more privacy if we stay in here,” Luna said. She put down the milk and tossed aside the hat. “May I come in?”
“… We can just talk outside.” The four walls of the house fell flat, revealing an empty, blank space that stretched out into eternity. “I’m going to be reassigned, aren’t I?”
“Is there a reason to reassign you?” Luna asked. “I did not walk in on a dream of you terrorizing Rainbow Dash and Taboo. What I have witnessed is… complicated. Tell me, what has brought this on?”
“Long story short, Taboo had a little incident Trick or Treating tonight. She got scared, but when I came to help her she called me ‘daddy.’”
“Daddy!” Taboo was stuck to his hoof again. This time she was smiling, nuzzling him affectionately.
“Hmm… from the mouths of foals…”
“I’m… not sure that expression works here,” Thunderhead said. He reached down and patted Taboo on the head, eliciting a giggle from her.
“But doesn’t it?” Luna’s smile caught Thunderhead off guard. “A title is often something we earn, and it seems you’ve been granted ‘daddy.’ You surely must have done something wonderful to earn that filly’s trust.”
“I’m not sure it has anything to do with trust.” Thunderhead looked down at Taboo, still snuggling his armored hoof. He reached up with his other hoof and removed his helmet. “What happens when you take away this?” He dropped it at his bare hooves. It clanked once, its reverberating echo on the edges of the deserted dreamscape.
“Interesting.” Luna picked the helmet off the ground with her magic. “You deny your claim to the title, yet you seem remiss to lose it.” She turned her head to the side, prompting Thunderhead to do the same.
“Daddy!” Taboo clung to some shadow Thunderhead didn’t recognize. He could only watch for a brief second before four walls fell around the scene, a door separating him from the warmth inside. It began to rain, washing the world in a blue hue.
“Does Rainbow Dash know of this incident?” Luna asked.
“Not about the ‘daddy’ part,” Thunderhead told her. He jumped a bit when Luna put his helmet back on his head. In a rush of wind, he turned from watching the door to standing beside it, looking out from the house. He turned his head and looked in the window. Rainbow Dash sat on her couch reading while Taboo played with Tank on the floor.
“So, nothing has changed,” Luna says, standing before him. “And how does that feel?”
“… Like I could have more if I tried.” Thunderhead kept watching, but he couldn’t dream up the way inside. He didn’t know how to be part of the scene.
“You really care deeply about that filly, don’t you?” Luna asked, even though it was clear from the way he looked in the window.
“I find it hard to believe anypony in my situation wouldn’t feel this way,” he said, not looking away from the window. “When she called me ‘daddy,’ there was a part of me that was really happy. I hoped that Taboo liked me, but it was really clear right then that she loved me like I loved her. I never really thought about becoming her father or anything, but for the rest of the night I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I kept asking ‘what if?’”
“Well, if you want to assert yourself as ‘daddy’, you know the next hurdle you must clear,” Luna said. There was another whirlwind, and when the spinning stopped Thunderhead was face to face with Rainbow Dash. “What are your feelings on the young mare?”
“I, well… I would be lying if I said I wasn’t attracted to her… but-”
“But?” Rainbow Dash asked him, giving him a sultry look. She stepped forward, invading his breathing space.
“I don’t want to pursue her just for Taboo.”
“Sergeant Thunderhead, you are looking at it from the wrong angle,” Luna said, scolding him for the first time. He hadn’t imagined he could get in trouble for not romantically pursuing one of the ponies he was supposed to protect. He was caught up in a whirlwind again. This time when he stopped, he was standing next to Rainbow Dash and facing Taboo. “Is this more comfortable for you?”
“Maybe?” Thunderhead wasn’t sure what to make of this. He lifted his hoof closest to Rainbow Dash, only to find it was bound to hers. They couldn’t walk forward unless they went together.
“Careful: this mare likes to move quickly.” This warning came mere moments before Rainbow Dash took off, dragging Thunderhead along for the ride. He struggled to keep up with her, but it wasn’t impossible. It was just the initial shock of being thrown into it that threw him off. He could keep up with her if he really tried. “This is more suitable for you?”
“I guess? I’m sorry, your highness, but I’m still not exactly sure what you’re trying to show me.”
“Must I spell it out for you?” Luna stamped her hoof, bringing Thunderhead’s flight to a sudden halt. He fell flat on his face in front of a chalkboard. Luna grabbed the chalk and wrote in long, flowing strokes across the board. When she was done, she tapped the board twice and read it aloud. “It is possible for you to have the attractive wife and cute daughter.” There were even little drawings of Rainbow Dash and Taboo, but they weren’t quite as nice looking as Luna’s writing. Thunderhead raised his hoof.
“Are you giving me the go ahead to try and woo Rainbow Dash?”
“Should I not be?” Luna asked, sitting down behind her desk. “There is no doubt that Rainbow Dash will seek a mate one of these days. I’d rather she pick somepony I already trust than some stranger.”
“Thank you for putting your trust in me, your majesty!” Thunderhead said, saluting the Princess. “No matter what, I won’t let you down.”
“Yes, especially after all the help I’ve given you.” Luna warned her guard, not at all blind to the possibility of failure. “When you are sharing your marriage bed with Rainbow Dash, do not forget the pony who gave you the proper push in that direction.”
“Well, good morning, squirt,” Rainbow Dash said, greeting a groggy Taboo wandering down the stairs. “Somepony must’ve had a good time last night. You were fast asleep by the time I got back!”
“Trick or Treating is exhausting,” Taboo said, heaving a labored sigh. She hopped up on the couch next to her mother and put her head in her lap. She was ready to fall asleep all over again. “It was a lot of hard work.”
“Yeah, it looks like it.” Rainbow Dash looked over to the door where two large bags full of candy sat. There was no way she was letting Taboo eat all of that. She reached down and stroked the filly’s mane. “You know, Pinkie Pie told me you ran into a little trouble last night.”
“I got separated from the group.” Taboo wasn’t too keen on remembering. She buried her face in mommy’s lap, trying to let the memory go. Those mean ponies had said such strange things and threatened her when she told them to go away. She wasn’t big like mommy; the other ponies didn’t listen to her.
“Did you want to talk about it?” Rainbow Dash asked, but Taboo quickly shook her head. “Are you sure?”
“Yes.” Taboo was too tired to be bothered with that scary memory. The last thing she wanted to do was talk about it. Her mommy was so brave, but Taboo couldn’t be brave like her last night. She tried, but it hadn’t helped. There was so much she didn’t understand. Taboo knew if it ever happened again, she would just curl up in a ball and make sure they couldn’t hurt her.
Rainbow Dash was scared out of her wits as well. Of all the times something could go wrong when Taboo had gone out without her, it had to be the first time. Despite telling herself it was an unlikely incident and happened by chance, she felt it had scarred her. She didn’t want to let Taboo out of her sight for a second. She wasn’t safe unless she was nearby. Taboo had only Rainbow Dash to protect her. Now, more than ever, this seemed true.
“You’re okay?” Rainbow Dash asked. It had taken everything she had not to wake Taboo up and make sure last night, but the filly looked so peaceful as she slept that Rainbow Dash couldn’t help but be relieved. Taboo was shaken, but she was unharmed.
“Yeah, I’m okay,” Taboo said, sniffling a little. She had gotten out of trouble, thanks to a certain pony. “Daddy saved me.”
“… Who?”
“Daddy did.”
Rainbow Dash had heard right, but it still didn’t make any sense. There was no “daddy.” At least, she wasn’t aware of the existence of one. She puzzled and puzzled, but elements of Pinkie’s story seemed to point to the answer.
Taboo had been crying alone with Thunderhead. The bullies were gone, but Thunderhead was there. Thunderhead had saved her. Thunderhead… was “daddy.” Even without the details of the story, he was the most likely suspect. Taboo loved him and he wore that armor. In a filly’s mind, that might be all it takes.
Rainbow Dash knew she had to say something here, but she hesitated. What was she supposed to say? Was she supposed to tell a yearling that she didn’t have a father? That didn’t seem right, but neither did letting the charade play on; however, there might be less harm in the latter.
She let her mind wander for a moment, imagining a world where Thunderhead was the daddy, she was the mommy, and Taboo was the foal. It was hard to say how that would play out exactly. Everything Rainbow Dash knew about Thunderhead began and ended with his job. He treats Taboo kindly, but he might do this simply because he is the one assigned to protect her. If he goes above and beyond, maybe he’s just an overachiever. There’s no telling if Thunderhead wants to be “daddy.”
“Hey, what’s that?” Taboo asked. Rainbow Dash snapped out of her little world and looked to where the filly was pointing.
“Oh, that. I won that for you.” She picked up the stuffed bear and presented it to her daughter. “Do you like it?”
“… He looks funny.”
“He’s tough!” Rainbow Dash wasn’t about to let all her hard work go to waste. “He can protect you when me and daddy aren’t around.” She had said it before she realized it. With that, she was complacent in Taboo’s fantasy. She wanted to kick herself, but right now her character wouldn’t do that.
“You’re not leaving again, are you?” Taboo asked, crawling up her mother in an attempt to get at eye level.
“Of course not,” Rainbow Dash said, hugging the filly close. “I’ll be right here beside you, no matter what.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.” It was the same promise Rainbow Dash had made over a year ago. Nothing was going to change that. She couldn’t even imagine what could.
Still, Rainbow Dash needed to talk to Thunderhead. She told herself she needed to talk to him just as soon as she could, but when the first snow fell that year she began to wonder if she was ever going to confront this.
7
“Eeyup.”
“Mmhmm.”
“Yeah.”
The three stallions all stood around outside of Sweet Apple Acres drinking hot cider. Despite the tranquility of the occasion, they still felt like something was missing. At least, Big Macintosh and Pokey Pierce could feel the slightly off resonance. Time Turner was too busy smiling like an idiot. It was not uncommon for him to do this in recent days, but there was something especially strange about it today.
“So… I guess congratulations are in order,” Pokey said, raising his mug. “To Big Macintosh Junior, for his no doubt tireless work to extend the Apple Family tree. May this foal be the first of many.”
“Eeyup.” Big Macintosh raised his own mug and toasted his achievement. Now that his wife had a bun in the oven, she and his mother couldn’t pester him about foals until this one got born. Now he could go about his life without them breathing down his back. Big Macintosh would just walk out the door with a kiss from his pretty little wife and come home to a hot meal full of love. He took a long draught of cider, noting that the only drawback was the times after dinner were significantly more tame.
“You’re so darn responsible,” Pierce said after drinking a little more of his cider. “Getting married, having kids, and working the farm. It’s good you’ve doubled your outstanding citizenship seeing as Time Turner over here has got a few gears out of place.”
Time Turner still wasn’t listening. In fact, he was humming a light tune to himself while dreaming in his own little world. He was just asking for somepony to ask him what he was so happy about.
“Hey Turner… nice sweater.” Pierce made sure it was incredibly clear that he was being sarcastic. Any sweater with an enormous, pink heart on it surrounded by little smiling bunnies was ripe for poking fun at.
“Oh Pierce, you’re so funny,” Time Turner replied, not so up in the air that he couldn’t pick up on the attitude coming his way. Nevertheless, his smile persisted. His sweater was warm and it reminded him that the most beautiful mare in Ponyville was in love with him. “Besides, you’re just jealous because your marefriend makes clothes for a living and yet she hasn’t ever knitted you a sweater.”
Big Macintosh hid his chuckling by sticking his face in his flagon of cider. Pierce on the other hoof decided to take a drink and act like he hadn’t heard Time Turner.
“You two are seriously the most obnoxious couple in Ponyville,” Pierce said, determined not to make this conversation about his own relationship and all its quirks. “Ever since Nightmare Night, Fluttershy has literally been hanging off of you every hour of the day. I could maybe put up with her constant baby-talk and spontaneous public displays of affection, but I have to draw the line at her dressing you up like my grandfather.
“Meanwhile, you’re just so much putty in her hooves, Timey Wimey . She’s got you so whipped you’d think she’s preparing to put you on a pie. I don’t think you even realize it. Now I won’t fault you for helping her with her animals or around her house. That’s gentlecoltly stuff, but nowhere is it written that a stallion has to buy his mare fresh cut flowers every morning or carry her every which way about town. Man, if I walk into your shop and trip over one more of those creepy love poems you can’t seem to stop writing, I’m going to vomit. Oh, I also heard from Rarity that you went to the spa. I know you didn’t just go there. No, you went to the spa . I feel like I don’t even know you anymore.”
“Love changes ponies, Pierce,” Time Turner said, not caring for his friend’s attitude. He could just as easily ridicule this unicorn for being at Rarity’s beck and call at every hour of the day and carrying out any task under her order without dispute.
“Well, love sure did a number on you.” Pierce went in for another long draught of his cider, but it was cut disappointingly short when he ran out. He gave his empty cup over to Big Macintosh in order to have him refill it from the keg. “The biggest travesty is that I know you aren’t getting any for all your trouble.”
“You know my stance on that, Pierce.” Time Turner was even more old fashioned that Big Macintosh, and he was quite happily so. “That would be irresponsible.”
“You two are already irresponsible, with the way you carry on.”
“You’re absolutely right.” Time Turner got strangely stern and took an uncharacteristically long drink of his cider. “I’m going to make an honest mare out of Fluttershy.”
“Well, nice to see some initiative on your part,” Pierce said. He received his cider back from Big Macintosh, foaming high and making vapor rise into the cold winter air. “So, you saving up for a ring?”
“Already bought it.”
“What? Dude, are you serious?” Pierce was glad he hadn’t taken a drink yet or he would have done a spit-take. “You two have only been really going steady for two months. Are you sure you’re ready to get married?”
“Timey, could you help me with this? Oh, that’s my big, strong stallion~! ”
“Hey, Turner. Equestria to Turner.”
“I hope you’re hungry because I made soup for us! Say aaah~! ”
“Great… I think we lost him, Macintosh.”
“I knitted this for you, Timey Wimey! My! You look so handsome in it~! ”
“Eeyup.”
“I’ll be back at lunchtime with some yummy treats for you! Buh-bye! Mwah~! ”
“This is why shy ponies shouldn’t be in relationships: they get all weird.”
“I get so embarrassed when everypony is watching… but I guess one little kissy is fine~! ”
“… Eeyup.”
“I’m confident I’m making the right decision,” Time Turner said, finally returning to the realm of the awake. He smiled and took a sip of his cider. “Yeeowch!” For some reason, his cider was a lot hotter than he remembered it being. He stuck out his tongue, now raw from being burned by the steaming beverage.
“And that’s why you stay here on the ground, Turner,” Pierce said, shaking the cider he was holding at the earth pony. “Or somepony might pull a switcheroo on you.”
“You burnt my tongue.”
“You burnt your own tongue, brother. Gotta look before you leap,” Pierce said, feeling no regret for his friend’s plight. “And you’re about to take a huge plunge.”
“I am a successful pony with plenty of disposable income and a beautiful mare by my side. Marriage is the next, logical step.” Time Turner sounded much more like himself. In an ironic twist of fate, cider had made him sober again. “It doesn’t matter how long we’ve been dating. Establishing a romantic relationship with somepony is essentially telling them you are interested in marrying them.”
“For you, maybe.”
“Oh? Should I tell Rarity you’re only dating her for the benefits?” Turner asked, effectively turning the tables on the conversation. Pierce had forgotten how sharp and cruel Turner normally was.
“That isn’t true!”
“You’ve been dating her longer than I’ve been dating dear Fluttershy, so when are you planning on getting married?” Turner asked, getting right at the heart of the matter.
“I don’t know. I’m not getting that signal from her yet.” Pierce drowned his uncertainty with more cider.
“Oh. ‘That signal’, hm?” Turner raised an eyebrow at his friend, but Pierce just kept on drinking. He turned to Big Macintosh instead. “Big Macintosh, did you wait for Roseluck to put out a ‘signal’ before you proposed?”
“Nnope.”
“I rest my case.”
“Aww, you two don’t know what you’re talking about!” Pierce could claim that, but he couldn’t back it up. He just wanted to throw the focus off of himself and get out of this conversation. “I’m just waiting for signs that she’s ready to get married. I haven’t seen any, so I’d rather not take her by surprise. I’m just gonna hold off on it for now.”
“He’s going to propose any day now! I just know it!” Rarity said, beside herself with excitement. “Please don’t tell him I know because I think he wants it to be a surprise. Oh, I bet he has something extravagant planned out! In fact, we’re going to that fancy restaurant up on the hill on Tuesday. You don’t think he’s going to propose then, is he? Oh dear, that’s sooner than I expected. I’m not sure I’m ready!” In true Rarity style, she levitated her fainting couch over to her so she could fall over onto it. The others had become strangely accustomed to this. Even in Twilight’s treehouse, they didn’t question how or when the couch got inside.
“Calm down, Rarity,” Twilight said, trying to comfort the frantic mare. “You’re always singing Pierce’s praises and we all agree he’s a sweet stallion. He loves you and you love him, so I’m sure things will be just fine. It’s perfectly normal to be apprehensive about such a big decision like getting married.”
“Oh, I know all that drivel, darling,” Rarity said, composing herself in half an instant. “I just have no idea what I’m going to wear.”
“Wouldn’t a mare normally wear a weddin’ dress to her weddin’?” Applejack asked. “I mean, shucks. Cadence wore a weddin’ dress, Roseluck wore a weddin’ dress, Cup Cake wore a weddin’ dress…”
“Applejack, it’s never just a wedding dress! This is probably the single most important dress I’m going to wear in my life! I can’t just wear any old dress for this occasion of occasions! Oh, but what to wear?”
“Rarity, you an’ I both know yer just gonna wear somethin’ you fix up yerself,” Applejack said what was on everypony’s mind. That is, it was on everypony but Rarity’s mind.
“Oh my goodness, darling. Why didn’t I think of that?”
“Because yer panickin’.”
“You’re right, I must compose myself,” Rarity said, doing just that. It wasn’t clear if she was worried about getting married or completely gung-ho about it. Either way, she wasn’t stable. “One day you’ll all fall in love and know how I feel.”
“That’ll be the day,” Rainbow Dash said, turning the page of Taboo’s picture book. The filly was paying a bit more attention to Rarity than reading, still interested in weddings and the like. “If I’m ever a nervous, mushy wreck like Rarity or Fluttershy, please tell me somepony is going to be a good friend and put me out of my misery.”
“What’s ‘out of my misery?’”
“Nothing, squirt.”
“Oh Rainbow Dash, you’ll find love someday,” Fluttershy said, happily humming to herself while knitting at the library’s center table. “Love might be closer than you think.”
“Can we not talk about this right now?” Rainbow Dash said, secretly pointing to Taboo; however, it was far too late.
“Mommy already has daddy,” Taboo said very matter-of-factly. She scrunched up her face, frustrated that nopony seemed to understand that. There was only one other matter she was slightly more frustrated with. “Mommy, you need to marry daddy so everypony knows.”
“Ah-ha… someday, squirt. Someday,” Rainbow Dash said, patting Taboo on the head. The other mares in the room gave her disapproving looks.
“Who knew charades could be such a dangerous game,” Twilight said, turning back to her book. She pretended to read while indirectly lecturing Rainbow Dash. “It would probably end faster if a stallion got involved. If things keep going like this, it won’t end well.”
“I’ve been in some bad games of charades,” Pinkie said, missing the point entirely. “They were brave ponies, and they will be remembered.” She saluted and gazed up at the ceiling. It was such a solemn gesture, everypony felt obligated to join in the moment of silence.
“What’s charades?” Taboo asked, ever curious about the strange flow of the conversation. “It sounds like food.”
“Are you hungry, Taboo?” Twilight asked all of a sudden. Before Taboo could even answer, she called Pinkie over. “Could you take Taboo into the kitchen and fix some snacks?”
“I’d be happy to!” Pinkie Pie galloped off in a blur of pink, scooping up Taboo somewhere along the way. The door to the kitchen slammed, leaving Rainbow Dash alone with four, very serious looking mares.
“Uh… why are you all looking at me light that?” Rainbow Dash asked, but they all kept staring at her. All four dropped what they were doing, except Fluttershy who continued to knit at a menacing pace, and formed a semi-circle around her.
“Rainbow Dash, this has gone on long enough.” Rarity was the first one to speak up. “We trusted you to be responsible and clear this all up, but we’ve decided we need to intervene.”
“You need to explain to Taboo who Thunderhead is,” Fluttershy said, her voice stern and even. “If you don’t, it’ll only confuse her.”
“It might upset her, but the truth needs to come out,” Twilight said, seconding the motion. “Just make sure she knows that Thunderhead doesn’t love her any less for it and everything should be fine. The longer you play this out, the harder it’s going to be on her. We all agree that this is the best course of action.”
“I don’t.” All eyes turned to Applejack. “If you tell her now, it ain’t gonna be pretty.”
“Applejack, I said we all agreed on the best course of action,” Twilight said, scolding her friend for going off script.
“I never said I agreed,” Applejack told her. “Look, Taboo is a smart little filly. She’s made the connection that everypony has a ma and a pa. If we tell her Thunderhead isn’t her father, she’s gonna wanna know who is. We don’t have an answer for that, not one that’s pleasant. She’s still too young to come to grips with the whole reality of her situation.”
“I guess that makes sense.” Twilight hadn’t considered that. Nopony had thought of that. Applejack may have saved them from making a big mistake.
“So then what should I do?” Rainbow Dash asked. She had planned on clearing things up by revealing the truth, but now she didn’t want to do that at all. There wasn’t an alternative available.
“Well, it ain’t exactly a for sure solution, but you could give Thunderhead a chance.”
“Applejack, are you serious?” Rarity asked. “That seems like a rather drastic measure.”
“I didn’t say she had to go an’ marry the fella right now, but why not give him a chance? Taboo likes him, so why not?”
“Taboo’s confusion might not be stemming from the kindness, Applejack,” Rainbow Dash said, taking a more active role in the conversation. “He has that armor that makes him look like her. He’s the only pony she knows like her. Without the armor, she probably wouldn’t even recognize him.”
“Well… that seems unlikely Rainbow Dash.” Fluttershy spoke up, still knitting away. “Not the recognition part, that makes sense, but Taboo wouldn’t assume Thunderhead is her father just based on that. Animals will put their trust into anything that shows them kindness, especially the younger ones. If their real parents aren’t present, they will truly believe their strongest sources of love are their real parents.”
“Fluttershy is right,” Twilight said. “Thunderhead has been helpful to you and supportive to Taboo. I mean, he’s certainly doing more than that day guard of yours.” Everypony took a moment to think about the wishy-washy guard who hung around in the daytime.
“You know, I heard a rumor that he’s been sneaking off with that hussy Cloudchaser when we’re not looking,” Rarity said. “Those two are just terrible. You should write Celestia and request a new one.”
“Uh, maybe I should,” Rainbow Dash said, casting her eyes to the ceiling. She had to pretend she wasn’t at all an enabler of Cloudchaser’s antics. “But, that’s not the point. Without the armor, the whole daddy thing goes out the window.”
“I’m still with Fluttershy on this one.” Applejack turned to the others. “I mean, I personally think Thunderhead seems like a nice fella.”
“Oh, he is very charming,” Rarity said, winking at Rainbow Dash. “I saw you dancing with him at Roseluck’s wedding.”
“Well, that’s the first I’ve heard of that.” Twilight grinned at Rainbow Dash. “Maybe you wanted him to play daddy all along?”
“H-hey!”
“Oh, she’s blushing.” Fluttershy started giggling uncontrollably, something she’d been doing a lot of recently. “You like him a teensy bit, don’t you?”
“How couldn’t she? The stallion is practically perfect for Rainbow Dash,” Rarity said, getting behind the pegasus and placing her hooves on her shoulders. “He’s big, strong, and he wears that armor so well. He’s a military pony, right up your alley. Oh, and he is just so darling with Taboo. I noticed him teaching her how to dance at Roseluck’s wedding too.”
“Uh-oh, sounds like you’ve got some competition, Dash,” Applejack said, prodding her friend. “But really, Taboo already loves the fella. Why not give him a chance yourself?”
“It’s the armor,” Rainbow Dash said, growing frustrated with her friends.
“Darling, it’s not the armor,” Rarity told her, refusing to relent when they had Rainbow Dash backed into the corner. “I think she really does love him.”
“No, that’s not it!”
“Why is that so hard to believe? Rainbow Dash, this isn’t about the armor.”
“But it is!” Rainbow Dash shouted, having already snapped. “I don’t want Taboo to know the armor comes off!”
“But why?” Twilight asked.
“Because she doesn’t know she’s different!”
The truth settled in the following silence. The real danger had been staring them right in the face all along. Taboo was too young and too sheltered to possibly know how the rest of the world saw her. It was right then that everypony felt the weight of what Rainbow Dash had been carrying.
One day Taboo would notice all the things that made her different. She would realize her mother isn’t the one who gave birth to her. She would find out that the one pony similar to her wasn’t what he appeared to be, but somehow it is exactly what she is. She is that thing, but what even is that thing? Were her real parents like she was? Where were they? Why did they leave her behind? Why hadn’t anypony told her?
Even without Thunderhead and even without the armor, the truth would have come to light. From the moment the six of them found her, she became a ticking time bomb. It wasn’t like they hadn’t realized these things would be an issue, but only now was it clear how much of an issue.
Rainbow Dash could protect her from everypony, but she couldn’t protect her from the truth.
“… We got a little carried away,” Rarity said after the silence had gone on long enough. She released Rainbow Dash and gave her a little space. “I guess it wasn’t our place to intervene.”
“No, it’s fine. I know you guys mean well.” Rainbow Dash needed their council and their prodding, no matter how much it bugged her. She didn’t have the luxury of turning down any help given to her. “… Look, I’ll talk to Thunderhead.”
“You will?”
“Yes, but just about Taboo. I think he should know about what’s going on.” Rainbow Dash meant it this time. Once Taboo was down for the night, she would talk to Thunderhead. “It’s hard to say how he’s going to react.”
“I doubt he’ll be angry or upset,” Rarity replied. “Just make sure you tell him. You can worry about dating him until afterwards.”
“Ugh, all everypony talks about nowadays is love and special someponies and marriage and dating! When is it going to end?”
“Don’t blame us, sugarcube. You started it when you got yerself a kid,” Applejack said, tossing the blame onto her friend. Rainbow Dash looked to her friends for a little support, but the looks on their faces said the same thing.
“You did start it.” Fluttershy put down her knitting needles and examined her finished product. “Do you think Timey will like his new hat?” Rainbow Dash didn’t answer. She just slumped to the floor in misery, cursing herself for bringing this all upon herself.
“He’ll adore it simply because you made it,” Rarity said, but not without rolling her eyes afterwards. Fluttershy’s insistence on using enormous pink hearts in her clothing was too cutesy for her tastes. Rarity wouldn’t be caught dead knitting something like that for Pierce. She would rather design him a tuxedo in preparation for their no doubt impending wedding.
“Oh, I do hope so. He’s coming over for dinner tonight, so I wanted to give it to him,” Fluttershy said, snuggling the hat she’d just made as if he were already wearing it. “He said there was something we needed to talk about, but he wouldn’t say what…”
Rainbow Dash stared at the inside of her own door. She raised a hoof to open it, but then drew it back. She told herself there was no need to be hasty. Taboo was going to be asleep for a long time to come and Thunderhead would be out there all night. There wasn’t any need to go and talk to him right this very second.
Then again, Rainbow Dash wanted to get it over with. She just wanted to rip the bandage off quick, so to speak. She didn’t know exactly what this was supposed to accomplish, but she had already said she was going to do it. She said she would do it tonight. What is she if not a mare of her word?
“I could always be a chicken.”
She opened the door and stepped out into the cold night air. Down below the clouds it was surely snowing in Ponyville, but up above there was nothing but cold air and wind. Cold without snow seemed pointless, but that’s how living up in the sky worked.
“Hey… hey, are you out here?”
Thunderhead hovered into view, flying out from the side of her house.
“You mean me?”
“Who else could I mean?” Rainbow Dash asked, staying in her doorway.
“I don’t know.” Thunderhead landed in front of her. “That’s why I was asking.”
“Okay, sure.” Rainbow Dash reminded herself not to be standoffish with him. She wasn’t frustrated with him, just her situation. There wasn’t any point in sublimating her anger onto him.
“So… was there something you needed?” Thunderhead asked after the pause got too awkward for him. “I’m here to help.”
Rainbow Dash still hesitated. Even if she’d said she would do it, that didn’t mean she knew how to go about it. There hadn’t been a moment in her life that prepared her for the situation she found herself in. As a result she wasn’t exactly sure what the best way to lead into this was, so she decided to just go right for the direct route. It was going to hurt, but it was better than nothing.
“Taboo thinks you’re her father.” Despite how long she’d been letting Taboo say it, saying it out loud to the stallion in question felt absolutely gut twisting. She wanted to just slam the door, go back inside, and then die of embarrassment. She found herself stuck to the spot she stood in. There couldn’t possibly be a way to diffuse the tension now.
“… Uh… I kind of already knew that.” Thunderhead stared out over his shoulder, avoiding eye contact. “She called me that when I showed up to help her on Nightmare Night.”
“… You knew?!” Rainbow Dash punched him in the shoulder. She glared up at him, trying to come up with something else to say. When she couldn’t, she punched him a few more times and then continued to scowl.
“Ow.” Thunderhead thought of making a “is that how you treat the father of your child” joke to lighten the mood, but he wisely refrained. If there was one thing he knew about mares, it was that you had to ride their anger out.
“Do you have any idea about how much I’ve been stressing over this?” Rainbow Dash asked, her voice cracking from frustration. She punched him again. “What am I supposed to do about this, huh? What are you going to do about this? This is your fault for being so nice to her!”
“I’m not going to apologize for being nice to her.” Thunderhead’s voice was flat. Unlike the mare in front of him, he was keeping his cool. She punched his other shoulder this time.
“Well I wasn’t asking you to apologize!” Rainbow Dash wasn’t really sure what she was angry about anymore, but she punched him a few more times because it did make her feel better. “She knows that it’s a mommy and a daddy that have a kid and she thinks the daddy is you! If you aren’t the daddy, then who is? What am I gonna do about this? What am I supposed to do?”
“I… can’t say I know.” Thunderhead had puzzled over this himself, and he’d already figured out what he wanted to do. It was clear that Rainbow Dash wasn’t currently thinking what he was thinking. She punctuated this by punching him.
“Well… figure it out!” Rainbow Dash slammed the door and went back inside. Thunderhead just stood there, confused as anypony could ever aspire to be. A breeze blew past, chilling him to the bone.
“Sorry Luna… but getting inside isn’t going to be that easy.”
Thunderhead couldn’t keep his armor from rattling. For some reason, Ponyville was having a particularly cold winter this year. As a soldier, he couldn’t let the bite of the cold bother him. Winter would get wrapped up here in a few days anyway, so he sucked it up and kept his watch.
Nowadays, he didn’t have much to look out for. There were times early on where he would spot somepony who looked like they were up to no good, but at time went on these incidents became fewer and farther between. Even when they went out at night, nopony hassled them. Still, he couldn’t relax. There was the ever present notion that somepony was waiting for him to disappear so they could move without fear. He was constantly aware of the looks they received and the hush of a crowd they appeared in.
Although, Thunderhead still wanted to be guarding from inside the house. Everypony in town knew he was around, so even if he wasn’t visible his influence should still be felt. If he was inside, he could try and get a little closer to Rainbow Dash or at the very least spend a little time with Taboo. For some reason, Thunderhead felt like an estranged husband who lost custody of his kid.
It was only the early evening with the moon merely hovering above the horizon, but Thunderhead was already feeling the night’s grind. Ever since Rainbow Dash had slammed the door in his face a few days ago, he had become like this. It had gotten so bad, he asked for advice from Sprout of all ponies.
“Mares?” he had said, perfectly surprised by the spontaneous question. “Do you even have time for a relationship?”
“Eh, well, I would have time for this one.” In retrospect, Thunderhead wished he had been more ambiguous. Out of all of his friends, Sprout is the best at remembering the little details. Even if Thunderhead hadn’t explicitly stated what he was doing for the Princess, Sprout knew enough to connect the dots.
“Are you thinking about dating the mare you’re protecting?” Sprout always looked worried, but at that moment he had looked completely mortified. “What would the Princesses do to you if they knew-”
“They do know.”
“… And you’re still alive?”
After that, Thunderhead spent more time defending his desire not to explain himself. It probably would have been quicker just to spill the beans, but Sprout gave in eventually. Thunderhead pleaded with him for just the smallest bit of insight to his problem, but Sprout didn’t have anything to say that he wanted to hear.
“There’s no secret to getting a mare to be interested in you,” Sprout said, nodding his head sagely. For some reason, his young appearance made the mares fawn over him constantly, so he wasn’t a total dud in the dating department. Neither was Thunderhead, but he’d been out of the game for a while now. “No two mares are alike. There are mares out there that don’t really care for the strong, military type of stallion. Heck, some of them don’t even care for stallions, but that doesn’t mean all is lost. Nopony really knows what it is they want when it comes to relationships, so just make yourself available and appealing. I guess that’s the secret.”
“That sounds manipulative.”
“Love is a game, buddy,” Sprout had told him. “If you’re playing for keeps, it pays to play dirty.”
Standing out in the cold shivering and rattling in the wind, Sprout’s advice didn’t seem helpful at all. He couldn’t very well play if he wasn’t even invited to the competition. For all he knew, Rainbow Dash was perfectly content to be single for the rest of her natural life.
The worst part was that the more he thought about her, the more he started to like her. By the time he noticed this was happening, it was too late. Now he couldn’t stop. Like a nervous colt back in school, he had a crush on the filly seated next to him. She wasn’t out of reach, but the need to reach at all was exactly the problem.
Thunderhead jumped when the front door of the house opened up just a sliver. He could hear voices behind it, one strong and one tiny. They talked rapidly while the door opened up a little wider. Out popped Taboo’s curious head, with her eyes and ears trained right on him. She didn’t look happy.
“See, he’s cold!” she said, opening the door the rest of the way. Her little frame shook a little in the cold wind, but she trotted over the cloud to him anyway. Rainbow Dash followed shortly behind, looking less pleased than Taboo.
“He’s fine,” Rainbow Dash said, hurrying after Taboo. “Now get inside before you catch a cold.”
“But he’s cold!” Taboo insisted. She grabbed Thunderhead’s hoof and began to tug him towards the door. The guard was at a loss for who to obey at the moment. He looked to Rainbow Dash for a verdict, but it was clear from her face that he was to remain outside the house.
“She claims she can hear you rattling out here,” Rainbow Dash said, raising an eyebrow. “I don’t even hear you rattling now.”
“But he is!” Taboo’s ears perked up and honed in on Thunderhead. “Let him come inside, please!”
Rainbow Dash had to admit it was a cold night to be standing in the dark outside the house. There probably wasn’t any danger of Thunderhead freezing to death, but if she didn’t get Taboo to come back inside the little filly might catch the sniffles. It pained her, knowing that caving once meant she was caving for good on it. She decided just to pretend to be a good role model.
“Fine, he can come in for a while.” Rainbow Dash gave her approval, turning around and heading into the house. “So hurry back in already.”
In an unbelievable turn of events, Taboo had given Thunderhead the vital opportunity he needed. He followed the filly into the warmth of the cloud house. He shut the door behind himself and looked around, recalling the last time he’d been invited inside.
Rainbow Dash flew over to the couch and flopped down, returning to her book and actively ignored Thunderhead. He wanted to try and talk to her, but there was another girl calling for his attention currently.
“Come and sit,” Taboo said very seriously while motioning for him to sit on the floor. He did as he was told as Taboo ran off to the back of the couch. When she returned, she was towing a blanket behind her. Taboo attempted to drape it over Thunderhead’s back, but she was much too small to reach his shoulders. She kept trying, but finally succeeded with a little help from the stallion himself.
“Thanks,” he said, patting Taboo on the head. She smiled in triumph and sat down next to him. She cuddled up to his leg through the blanket and relaxed.
“I’ll keep you warm too!” she told him, looking up at him. “Mommy says ponies shouldn’t stand around in the cold.”
“She’s a smart mare,” Thunderhead said, glancing back at Rainbow Dash. “You should listen to her.”
“I do!” Taboo always listened to mommy. She found it hard to believe that daddy would doubt that she’d go against mommy. Taboo wasn’t too keen on getting in trouble, and whatever mommy told her to do kept her safe. There were only a few exceptions to her orders. “But mommy said you couldn’t come inside the house. She said you have to stay outside.”
“Well, I have to watch the house,” he replied, being honest with her. “I want to keep you and your mommy safe.”
“You can watch from inside,” Taboo said with the utmost certainty. She didn’t want her daddy staying out in the cold all night every night. “You should be inside the house with us more often.” Taboo’s gaze dropped as she lied down to put her chin on the floor.
“I would if I could kiddo, but my place is outside.”
“No it’s not,” Taboo said as an expert on the matter. “Mommies and daddies are in the same house. Pumpkin and Pound’s mommy and daddy have the same house. Grandma and grandpa live in the same house far away. How come you’re only at our house at night? I wish you were here always with us.”
“Ah… well,” Thunderhead started to say, but he wasn’t sure what to say. He glanced over at Rainbow Dash momentarily. Over the top of her book, she was watching him. There was very little indication that he was trusted with this very delicate situation. He didn’t dare say anything that would contradict something Rainbow Dash had told Taboo, but there was no way of knowing what any of that was. He hadn’t exactly been brought up to date on all that information.
“Mommy says you don’t live here because you’re not married.” Taboo continued on her own. “Why don’t you marry her?”
“Marry her?” Thunderhead didn’t mean to sound quite so opposed to the idea. He didn’t dare look back at Rainbow Dash right now. It’s true that he thought she was a great mare and all, but he couldn’t propose right then and there. There was no way he could even slightly insinuate that the two of them might get married. He collected himself and tried to recover. “Marriage is complicated, kiddo. You can’t just jump into it all of a sudden.”
“Auntie Fluttershy and Mr. Turner are getting married,” Taboo said perking up a little. “Me and mommy are gonna go to her wedding. Are you going to come?”
“I’ll certainly try to come.” Thunderhead was glad to see the conversation moving to a much safer topic. “I’ll definitely be there after sundown.”
“Good, because you have to come,” Taboo said with a short nod, shocking Thunderhead with how adamant she sounded. Before he could recover, Taboo got on her hind hooves and got as close to his ear as she could manage. “That way you’ll know what to do,” she whispered before plopping back down.
“Yeah… I’ll keep my eyes open.”
“Speaking of keeping eyes open,” Rainbow Dash said, her book thumping closed. “It’s somepony’s bedtime.”
“But I want to stay up with daddy!” Taboo said, keeping herself parked next to Thunderhead.
“Well, he’s big and you’re tiny, so lucky you gets to go to sleep.” Rainbow Dash got up off the couch and approached Taboo. The little filly sidled up closer to Thunderhead, determined to try and stay up. “Say goodnight.”
Taboo refused to say anything.
“Didn’t I say you should listen to your mother?” Thunderhead said, getting Taboo’s attention. “It’s too late for little fillies to be up.”
“… But I wanna stay with you.”
“I’ll be back tomorrow night,” he told her, putting his hoof around her. “I promise, so go to bed.”
“You promise you’ll come back?”
“Tomorrow night just like every night.”
“And you’ll be inside?” Taboo got up and turned to her mother. “He can come in, right?”
Rainbow Dash blew some air out of her nose. She didn’t want to say yes, but she couldn’t say no. She decided it was best not to acknowledge the question.
“C’mon, it’s bedtime.” Rainbow Dash tapped Taboo on the rear and got her moving. Reluctantly, Taboo complied and started up the stairs with her mother following right behind her. She only stopped once along the way to sneeze.
Taboo disappeared into the upper room, but Rainbow Dash stopped short of the upper landing. She turned back and looked right at Thunderhead, cocking her head to the side to indicate it was time for him to leave.
Just like that, he was back where he started out. He stood out in the cold by himself, unsure if he’d even made any progress. All he had managed to do was reaffirm that Taboo thought of him as daddy, but Rainbow Dash was another story. The only thing colder than the whipping winter winds was that mare’s attitude. He could figure out why she was treating him so harshly when his greatest crime was being too kind. Thunderhead felt his flame of hope suffocate, leaving him to shiver.
Sprout stared dismally at the massive dent in his helmet. He trotted double time back to the barracks, in desperate need for a replacement before inspection. It was much too early in the evening for this kind of thing to be happening to him, a pony who hadn’t done anything wrong his entire life. Why should a misfired arrow strike his helmet of all helmets? He couldn’t believe his luck. This is exactly why he thought night guards should be exempt from archery.
Nopony in his patrol squad was willing to lend him a helmet, so he was stuck fending for himself. There were still a few minutes before inspection, so if he hurried he could remedy this situation.
Sprout hurried into the barracks, casting the broken helmet aside. He made a beeline to his bunkroom and threw the door open. He was surprised to see Thunderhead staring at the ceiling in the dim candelight. He was usually long gone by this time in the evening.
“Hey,” Sprout said, still in a rush. He threw his equipment chest open and began to root through it, looking for something to put on his head.
“Hey.” Thunderhead’s response was barely audible. He didn’t move from his position. Sprout didn’t have time to care, seeing as he had his own problem to attend to. Unfortunately, all he had were spare horseshoes and an extra cuirass.
“Shoot!” he slammed the chest shut.
“Problem?”
“I need a helmet or I’m sunk.”
“Take mine,” Thunderhead said, tossing his own helmet at Sprout. The hurried pegasus managed to catch it and pull it onto his head.
“It’s kind of big for me…”
“Do you have the luxury of being picky?” Thunderhead asked, his voice still distant. Sprout would have stopped and asked what was obviously bugging him any other day of the week, but right now was not the time.
“Thanks, I owe you one,” Sprout said, turning to leave the barracks in a hurry. He figured he should offer at least one word of council before heading out. Before closing the door behind himself, he said the one thing he could think off. “You’d better get a move on.”
The door shut and Thunderhead was alone again. He could go, but the purpose behind going felt empty. It was a selfish frustration, but he couldn’t get around it. It was easy being the guard outside the door, but truly becoming daddy was difficult. The larger part of him didn’t want to keep going after such a thankless pursuit. His presence just confused Taboo and frustrated Rainbow Dash. They had enough to worry about without the problems he added.
Somehow, he mustered up the vigor to put on the rest of his armor and head out to Ponyville. It was still his job, and it was a job given to him by the Princess of the Night. He couldn’t very well disappoint her. He also promised Taboo he would come back, and he’d be crushed if he disappointed her. Rainbow Dash could have a fit for all he cared, he told himself. He had to shake off this blue funk and get back in the game.
He’d done some thinking, and he’d realized why he’d been cut so deep last night. It was completely foolish and totally childish, but he was hurting from the pain of being rejected by Rainbow Dash. He’d overthought his future with her to the point that he could not extricate her from the role of his special somepony, from the role of his wife. He’d grown fonder of her than his actual closeness merited, and that made him vulnerable. Although his head protested against thinking that way, his fickle heart wasn’t something he could control.
Thunderhead flew over Ponyville quietly sleeping on a clear, winter night. Little ponies tucked into beds with their loved ones, down the hall from their children. That’s all he saw down there, something he lacked and envied. If Luna had told him this job came with all kinds of conflicting emotions and thoughts, he probably would have turned it down. All the turmoil would only be worth it if he could achieve his ultimate goal.
His greatest obstacle remained the same: he hadn’t a clue where to start.
As he approached his usual post, he sensed something was off. More specifically, something sounded off. It sounded like somepony was shouting in his general direction. As the front of the house became visible in the darkness, he noticed Rainbow Dash standing in the doorway. Thunderhead’s heart sunk as he realized she was doing the shouting.
He considered all the things that could’ve possibly transpired while he was busy brooding. Taboo may have run off in search of him, or perhaps somepony who intended harm used his absence as an opportunity to snatch her away. He beat his wings as hard as he could flying down to the cloud like a line of hot lightning. When he arrived before Rainbow Dash, he finally realized what she was shouting.
“Where have you been?” Rainbow Dash shouted at him, both fuming and shivering. “Get in here, now!”
Thunderhead followed her inside without a word, trotting behind her briskly. He only paused to close the door behind himself, but he got a surprise when he turned around. He found Fluttershy sitting on Rainbow Dash’s couch, looking quite cross herself.
“What’s wrong?” he asked, unable to endure the suspense.
“This is all your fault!” Rainbow Dash suddenly turned about and punched him in the shoulder. “You had to stand outside in the cold and then Taboo went out to get you! Now she’s got a cold… and it’s your fault!”
“A cold?” He tried not to sound underwhelmed, understanding that a sick child is never a small deal for a mother. Even if it was the common cold, he had to treat it like a deadly illness. That meant shouldering the blame. “Sorry about that, but there was nothing I could’ve done.”
“Well, you kept her waiting!” Rainbow Dash shouted, punching him a few more times.
“Waiting?” he asked, but Rainbow Dash refused to respond. She scrunched up her face and averted her gaze. The mare didn’t even punch him this time. Fluttershy had to break the silence.
“Taboo has been asking to see you,” she said, revealing the source of Rainbow Dash’s frustration with the guard. “We’ve been taking care of her, but Taboo started asking where you were during the afternoon. She’s been pretty upset about it.”
“Who, Taboo or Rainbow Dash?” Thunderhead received a punch to the shoulder for that quip.
“Both.”
Rainbow Dash could’ve punched Fluttershy for that one; however, friends do not give friends black eyes right before their wedding. Instead, she just punched Thunderhead again, but she looked at Fluttershy while she did it. There were more pertinent matters to attend to anyway.
“Get your butt up there and say hello,” Rainbow Dash demanded, pushing Thunderhead towards the stairs. The stallion hardly needed any coaxing as he trotted his way up to the top floor.
“I’ll just see myself out,” Fluttershy said, picking herself up and heading towards the door. Neither of the other ponies heard her, but that was pretty typical for Fluttershy.
Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead cracked the bedroom door open. Taboo’s bed sat vacant, but in Rainbow Dash’s larger bed Taboo was set up against pretty much every pillow in the house. Swaddled tight in three blankets, the little filly slept fitfully. They moved silently to the bedside, fearing that even the slightest noise would wake her. They spoke to one another, but only in whispers.
“Seems kind of serious for a cold,” Thunderhead said, noting the apparent severity of the situation. Beads of sweat lined Taboo’s forehead and her breathing was heaving, indicating she was struggling with particularly nasty virus. “Shouldn’t you take her to see a doctor?”
“I don’t trust the doctors.” Rainbow Dash was very frank with him. She didn’t need to explain exactly why she couldn’t put her trust in Ponyville’s doctors to help. The reasoning was pretty obvious to Thunderhead. “It’s not the same, but I called Fluttershy over to get her opinion on the matter. She takes care of sick animals all the time, so I figured she would probably know her way around taking care of a pony too.”
“What was her diagnosis?”
“… Not a word of this to Taboo,” Rainbow Dash said, her warning piquing Thunderhead’s curiosity. “Taboo’s probably got the same cold that’s been going around town, but she’s hit harder because she’s vulnerable to the sickness. Wherever she comes from, the ponies there probably don’t catch colds all that often.”
“That’s what she told you?” Thunderhead asked, thinking that explanation was a bit farfetched. “How could a whole population be isolated from something as common as the common cold? It would probably take generations for something like that to develop among a population.”
“And nopony has ever seen a pony like Taboo, ever,” Rainbow Dash replied. “I can’t say for sure, but it looks like wherever she came from is pretty inaccessible. If the common cold couldn’t travel there, how did she travel here?”
“How sure are we that it’s just a cold?”
“We treated it like a cold and it got better like a cold. She was a lot worse off this morning,” Rainbow Dash said. She took a cold rag soaking in a basin next to the bed and wiped Taboo’s forehead off. Her gaze fixed on her daughter as she forgot Thunderhead was even around. “It’s just mystery after mystery with you, isn’t it?”
Whether from the cool, moist feeling on her forehead or the low voice of her mother, Taboo stirred awake. She blinked her half lidded eyes, her brain hot and not quite lucid. She groaned and stretched a bit, constricted by all the blankets she had. At first she didn’t focus on anything, but as the figures in the dark room became clearer she could see there was somepony other than her mother with her.
“Hey kiddo,” Thunderhead said when he was sure she could listen and comprehend.
“Hi daddy,” Taboo responded, her voice quiet and hoarse. It was hard to talk through her sore throat, but she fought on valiantly against it. She moved like she was about to get up, but Rainbow Dash tittered at her.
“You’ve got to sit tight, squirt.” Rainbow Dash made sure she was still tucked securely into the bed. Despite her condition, this wasn’t the first time Taboo had tried to get up. “You’re not in any shape to be up and about. Besides, it’s time for you to be asleep anyway.”
“But I’ve been sleeping!” Taboo protested best she could; however, it was no small task considering her current state. The pain in her throat rose with a raw burn as a sob made its way through. “Why do I have to be sick? I wanna play with daddy!”
“I’m sorry, please don’t cry,” Thunderhead asked, without much of a result. He got down on Taboo’s level and put a hoof on her head. Her entire body was hot to the touch, which just worried him more. For the little filly’s sake, he put on a brave smile. “You just focus on getting better. Once you’ve done that, we’ll have plenty of time to play.”
“But I want to now!” Taboo tried to shout, but it hurt too much. “I don’t wanna be sick.”
“Then rest,” Thunderhead said, imploring her. “Rest and get better. I kept my promise and came back to see you tonight, so now you’ve got to promise you’ll go back to sleep for me, okay?”
“… Okay,” Taboo mumbled, already tired from all her activity. Despite her strong desire to stay awake and be well, her weakness and need to sleep couldn’t be conquered. She sunk fully into the covers and got as comfortable as she could manage. Thunderhead backed up, glad to see she was settling down.
“Good girl,” Rainbow Dash said, placing the rag back in the basin. She leaned in and gave Taboo a peck on the forehead and nuzzled her. “I love you, goodnight.”
“Goodnight mommy, I love you.” Taboo closed her eyes. Like a tiny angel, her resting expression was a serene smile. Despite her fever, a heavy sleep was starting to cover her like fourth blanket. She was warm and safe at home, protected by her parents. “Goodnight daddy, I love you.”
“… Sleep tight, kiddo.”
Rainbow Dash nudged him towards the door. The two of them moved like weightless ghosts out of the room, managing not to make a single sound. Rainbow Dash left the door cracked behind them and led Thunderhead back downstairs. She flopped down on the couch and buried her face into the arm, seeing as the pillow was elsewhere at the moment. Thunderhead stayed around, unsure of what he should be doing. His ears perked up when he heard Rainbow Dash let out a strained groan.
“I can’t believe how stressful this is.” Rainbow Dash spoke in a way that was clearly audible for Thunderhead, which made him wonder if she was actually speaking to him. Whether or not this was true, she went on nonetheless. “Taboo is sick, Fluttershy’s wedding is in a few days, I’ve got work, and I’ve got to fit in practice somewhere in my day. I’ve got all this stuff to do, but all I want to do is lay on this couch and not do it. You know what I mean?” She ended on a question, clearly indicating that she was indeed talking to him. He recovered from the shock and mustered up a response.
“Doesn’t sound easy,” he said. “I don’t know how you do it.”
“I’m just awesome,” she replied, finally cracking a smile.
“I’ll say.” It was only two little words, but Thunderhead immediately regretted saying them. He should have just laughed or said something that couldn’t be so easily misconstrued. He kept scolding himself on the inside, rattling off the millions of things that Rainbow Dash could be thinking he meant. In fact, he wasn’t sure what he meant. It just kind of came out. He had just got her to treat him normally again, so he did not want her to return to alienating him.
For her part, Rainbow Dash rolled over and looked at him. Each one tried to get a read on the other, but they both wore passive, neutral expressions. They were still in stalemate, one not wanting to move out of spite and the other too scared of the other’s spite to move. Something had to be done. They were in this pickle together, so Rainbow Dash had to admit she would rather be his friend than his enemy. She took a deep breath, told Twilight Sparkle to eat her heart out under her breath, and then proceeded.
“What are your intentions?”
“My intentions?” Thunderhead raised an eyebrow. It wasn’t exactly what he had expected her to say.
“What is it that you want?”
He wanted to be the real father, but it still wasn’t appropriate for him to come right out and admit that. Thunderhead wrote that off as his end goal, his ideal goal. For now, he needed to focus on what was within his ability to do. He trusted that if it was meant to be, it would be.
“I just want Taboo to be happy.” He couldn’t make his desires much more bare bones than that. His main job, both professionally and purposely, was to ensure her safety, wellbeing, and happiness.
“So you’re okay with being ‘daddy?’” Rainbow Dash asked, moving towards the point she wanted to make with this stallion. He gave her a nod, as if shrugging the weight of his assumed responsibility higher onto his shoulders. She wondered if she could trust him not to back down. “We’re probably going to drag out this façade whether we want to or not. You do realize it’s going to blow up in our faces one day, right?”
“It doesn’t have to be a terrible explosion,” Thunderhead said, assuring her. “If we prepare ourselves and Taboo, it’ll be alright. She’ll understand.”
“How can we expect her to understand when there’s so much we don’t understand ourselves,” Rainbow Dash replied. She got up from the couch and stood before him in order to make eye contact. It was just to ensure he was paying attention, but all Thunderhead could think about was how pretty she was.
“What is it we don’t understand?” Thunderhead was just a bit behind on the issues that needed sorting out. Rainbow Dash heaved a sigh, not wanting to labor over explaining everything to him. She would rather just keep moving forward to make progress.
“Can you take off the rest of your armor?”
“… The rest of my armor?”
“You’re not wearing a helmet.”
Thunderhead reached up and touched his exposed mane. He had forgotten that he’d loaned out is helmet to Sprout. He still had the most important piece: the cuirass. He didn’t know why he needed to remove his armor, but he started to do so anyway. He was feeling pretty pliant tonight.
The armor over his flank dropped off first as he loosened the straps, and next he removed the cloth covering in order to expose the straps that held the front of his cuirass in place. He fussed with them a little, but after a bit of struggle the final piece fell to the ground. He kicked his hoof armor off and stood bare as the day he was born.
Except, he still looked like he was the same as Taboo. Rainbow Dash twisted her head and examined him, expecting the illusion to fall off of him at any moment like a tattered bag caught in a fence on a windy day. Thunderhead did not change, but just stood there watching her watch him.
“Aren’t you supposed to go back to normal?” Rainbow Dash asked, kicking herself a bit for using the word “normal,” but it was all she had at the moment. It should at least be normal for Thunderhead.
“Oh, right.” Thunderhead reached behind himself to where he cutie mark should have been. He put a hoof on his blank flank and then drew it back, which cued the start of his transformation. As his hoof moved, something came along with it. Like a purple, ornate band-aid, Thunderhead peeled off the talisman that altered his appearance. As soon as it was off, his whole body appeared to swish and then snap back to normal as if he was a towel somepony had just shook. He rolled up the parchment talisman and put it with his armor. “Uh… ta-da?”
Rainbow Dash looked him over. The most drastic changes were that he had feathered wings and round pupils now, but other things had only changed slightly. His mane and tail had gone from a strong, dark blue to a faded, lighter blue. His grey coat had turned somewhat golden, but a faded and weathered gold. His coloring lacked the brightness that was common among most ponies, but Thunderhead’s colors were so dull it was hard to spot the imposing storm cloud bristling with lightning on his flank.
“It’s the color, isn’t it?” Thunderhead asked after Rainbow Dash didn’t say anything for a while. “All the guards who use the talisman have this happen to them. It’s a little like poison; it darkens you.”
“Poison?”
“It certainly isn’t pathogenic, but it isn’t all that healthy. The first time you put it on it makes you feel… different.” Thunderhead, like everypony who had ever gone through what he had, struggled to find the words to describe the experience. “After that, we all experience a whole slew of symptoms. We get irritated by bright light, our ears get sore, and food loses its taste just a little bit. It all goes away after a few months, once you grow accustomed to it.”
“So that’s how it works,” Rainbow Dash said to herself, looking the stallion over. She was trying to get a feel for him outside of his armor and outside of his disguise, but at the same time she was wondering if there was any way she could pass this version of Thunderhead off as the version Taboo was familiar with. She hoped it wasn’t the case, but Rainbow Dash had to admit that she wouldn’t have known Thunderhead if she passed him on the street looking like this. “… We have a responsibility to set Taboo straight, but the last thing I want to do is upset her. Will you do something for me?”
“If it’s within my ability,” Thunderhead replied, saluting to her. It felt kind of odd without his armor on.
“Taboo needs to see this.” She gestured to the stallion she was addressing. “I don’t know how she’ll react, but we can see where it goes. We can wait until she’s over her cold, but we’ve got to take care of it.”
“If that’s what you want to do, then I’m all for it.” Thunderhead turned around and started putting his armor back on. He wasn’t really supposed to take it off while he was on duty, but he figured there could be special exceptions. “I hope she gets better soon.”
“You and me both,” Rainbow Dash said with a sigh, dropping the former air of urgency. There was no better way to derail her train of thought than to bring up Taboo. “I don’t want to deal with this during Fluttershy’s wedding, and Taboo would be crushed if she missed it because she was too sick. This is turning out to be a big mess, and I hope you realize it’s all your fault.”
“So I’ve been told.” Thunderhead fixed his cuirass back onto his body and secured it. He didn’t feel quite right without his armor on. It used to just be something that kept him safe, but now it was something far more complicated. It might just make or break his relationship with Taboo. There was plenty of blame on his shoulders, but he was ready to bear it. “If she misses the wedding, I’ll make it up to her somehow.”
“How are you going to make up a wedding?”
Thunderhead had a pretty good idea of how to do that, but he refrained from saying it. Instead, he just shrugged his shoulders.
“Well, hurry up and think of something,” Rainbow Dash said, turning her back to him and heading up the stairs. It was time for her to retire for the night. The day had worn her thin, but she didn’t let it show. There was no way she could afford to let it show.
“By the power vested in me, I pronounce you mare and colt.”
Applause broke out as the newlyweds trotted side by side back up the aisle. The bride was blushing maybe a bit too much and the groom looked like he had just successfully diffused a bomb. The crowd was modest in size, but those in it poured their hearts out to wish the couple good luck. Their smiling wedding party followed right behind them, one mare carrying an extra pony along with her.
“You holding up okay?” Rainbow Dash asked Taboo was she trotted. The filly lay on her belly on her mother’s back, but her eyes were still alert. “If you feel like you want to go home, this would be the time to go.”
“But I want to go to the next part,” Taboo said, referring to the reception. She sniffled and rubbed her nose with her hoof. She still wasn’t a hundred percent, but neither Taboo nor Rainbow Dash could imagine missing Fluttershy’s wedding. Sick or not, there was no way Rainbow Dash could’ve let her friend get married without her there.
“If you feel up for it.” Rainbow Dash felt Taboo nodding her head. “Okay, but tell me if you feel like you need to go. I don’t want you pushing yourself.”
“I’m fine.” It was a lie, but Taboo really, really, really wanted to go to the reception. She wanted to see everypony dancing together again.
The reception was being held right out back of Fluttershy’s cottage, right in the neat little meadow separating her property from the Everfree forest. It had always been a lovely little place, and in the light from the lanterns hung about the clearing there was even a hint of romance in the air. The sun set against the winter landscape, but only a mild cool hung in the air. Spring was just begging to enter back into the world that evening.
Thus, the reception started. Food was served and a bunch of hungry ponies chowed down after having no food for what felt like an eternity. They should have been eating hours ago, but the wedding got delayed and postponed due to nerves more times than what should have been acceptable. The pair went through with it in the end, and as they shared their first meal as husband and wife there wasn’t a trace of regret to be seen.
Rainbow Dash, on the other hoof, was starting to feel some regrets of her own.
“I’ve got to say, this is quite possibly the most putridly cute wedding I’ve ever been to,” Discord said, cutting himself another dainty piece of the fine china and taking a careful bite. He savored the taste before swallowing it down. “Granted, I’ve only ever been to one other wedding. Nothing quite says matrimony like a meteorite, black eyes for all the bridesmaids, and an impromptu alligator rodeo! Those things were all provided by yours truly, but that’s a different story.”
“Yeah, sounds like a real page turner,” Rainbow Dash said, downing some more champagne to try and numb the pain. It was her great fortune to be in the company of Discord in the wedding party. Time Turner had only included him after much coaxing by Fluttershy, despite the avatar of chaos stating several times that he would rather the couple just send him a postcard from their honeymoon.
“What’s a meteorite?” Taboo asked, ever curious even when under the weather.
“Meteorite is what the moon is made of, dear Taboo. It’s mostly cheese, but partially rutabaga paste.” Discord never had a shortage of strange things to fill Taboo’s head with. Rainbow Dash didn’t approve.
“Don’t listen to him Taboo,” she said for the thousandth time. “He’s absolutely crazy.”
“Well, I might be absolutely crazy, but I’m just trying to stimulate a young mind,” Discord said, poofing a mortarboard onto Taboo’s head and handing her a diploma. “Just stick with your Uncle Discord and he’ll show you the ropes.”
“Ropes?”
“If you’re interested in ropes!” Discord snapped and turned Taboo’s scholarly attire into a bunch of ropes. “Tell me, what interests you?”
“I’d just like to stop being sick,” Taboo said. At this age, not much more than the immediate bothered her on any sort of deep level.
“Well, I hear apples are good for that,” Discord said, stroking his beard. “I can’t really say because I don’t tend to get sick. I only caught disco fever that one time, and the only cure for that is more cowbell…”
“Which is why you should keep quiet,” Rainbow Dash said, snorting hot air at the draconequus. Upbeat music started to drift through the air, ushering in a change in mood at the reception. Bellies were full, so the true festivities could begin.
“Well, if you’re not going to entertain me, I’m going to go cut a rug,” Discord said, levitating up out of his seat and towards the dancefloor. “And this time, I am speaking figuratively… mostly.”
“Yeah, see if I care!”
After about ten minutes, Rainbow Dash found herself caring. She found the situation painfully familiar. All of her friends had somepony to dance with while she was left alone with Taboo. While the filly was enjoying herself enough, Rainbow Dash was grinding her teeth to the nub over this. For some reason, she was even more peeved about it than she was at the last wedding she attended.
There at the center of all of it was her oldest friend. She looked just like a bride should: beautiful in flowing white. She was smiling, happy. She was with that stallion who was once a complete stranger, but now she said she loves him. Even with all her nerves, hang-ups, flaws, and imperfections, Fluttershy found it. She did it, and what’s more is she did it pretty much on her own…
“How is she doing?”
“I got her to come out from under the bed, but she won’t stop shaking.”
“Well, it’s progress. Need any help?”
“Thanks, but no thanks, Twilight,” Rainbow Dash said, whispering through the paper thin opening of the door. “She’s still pretty jumpy, so it’s probably best we keep this one-on-one for now.”
“If you say so.”
“How’s Taboo?” Rainbow Dash asked, hating herself from being away from her daughter when she was still feeling a bit sick. She realized Fluttershy’s plight was a bit more pressing, but a mother had to have priorities.
“She’s behaving just fine, but Discord is really starting to worry me,” Twilight said. “I hate to say it, but he knows the way into a young child’s heart. It’s probably because he has the brain of a foal himself.”
“You do what you can, and I’ll do what I can.”
“I’ll check back soon. Good luck.”
“Thanks.” Rainbow Dash closed the door carefully, making not a single noise. When it was securely in place, she turned back to Fluttershy. The mare was still staring catatonically into the mirror. She held her bouquet before her, but it shook like a cheerleader’s pompom in the middle of the state competition after two cups of coffee and a powdered donut. There were more petals on the floor than the flowers. “How’re you holding up?”
“I’ve never been so afraid in my life.”
“That’s saying something.” Rainbow Dash took a seat next to her, slowly. “You want to talk about it?” Despite her offer, Rainbow Dash had no idea what she was doing. She was flying blind into a world she had little authority to talk about. As much as she’d like to pat her friend on the back and then deliver the magic advice that gives her the courage to walk down the aisle, there was no way Rainbow Dash could do that.
“What is there to talk about? Everything is pretty clear to me,” Fluttershy spoke, with a smooth and even tone. She was so freaked out it looped back around into calm. “I’ve known him for two months, Dash. Am I really ready to marry somepony? How do you even know you’re ready? I hadn’t even dated somepony up until two months ago. My parents knew each other for over a year before they got married, and they got divorced. Do we even stand a chance?”
“Ah… well… you’ll never know unless you try!” Rainbow Dash had to try to bring her around whether or not she thought she could. All she knew is that she should not admit that Fluttershy’s reasoning was pretty solid.
“So many marriages end in divorce, Dash. I looked it up because I was curious. It’s half. Half of them end in divorce. That’s not even the scary part. Do you know how the other half end?”
Rainbow Dash shook her head.
“Death.”
“Oh…”
“Don’t you see?” Fluttershy turned and looked her friend in the eye for the first time since her nerves started kicking in. “I’m going to spend the rest of my life with him. It won’t be over until one of us is dead. Mares usually outlive the stallions in marriage. How am I going to deal with that? I’m just going to wake up one day and he’s just going to be there dead? What do you even do when that happens?”
“Fluttershy, I think you’re thinking a bit far into the future.”
“Maybe so, but there are plenty of things in the near future to worry about.” Fluttershy turned back to the mirror and stared at herself. “We talked about it, you know? About having foals together. I want them, he wants them. We’re going to start a family. I’ve taken care of foals and baby animals before, but they were never mine . Can I even handle that?
“And forget about even taking care of or having a foal. If that’s going to happen, I’m going to have to have sex with him. I know it’s supposed to be a wonderful and intimate experience, but I’m absolutely terrified. I’m not ready for this at all. I jumped right into this without preparing even a little bit. I’m such a fool…”
“Ah… jeez, Fluttershy.” This was a bit heavy for Rainbow Dash. “If you’re not ready, you don’t have to go through with it today.”
Fluttershy turned on her, with eyes wider than dinner plates. She clutched her bouquet close to her chest, and for a moment she was soundlessly still. She stayed transfixed for an eternal three seconds, but then she started to slowly shake her head.
“No… today is the day. Ready or not, here we come.” Fluttershy managed to laugh at what she’d said, which Rainbow Dash wasn’t sure was a sign she was panicking more or less. “Maybe I’m not ready, but I do love him. I’ve never loved anypony like I love him, and he loves me. Goodness, he asked me to marry him, didn’t he? He didn’t ask because he thought I could be a perfect wife, but just because he wanted to show his love for me. I shouldn’t be cowering in here, making him wait.”
“Yeah… yeah, that’s the spirit!” Rainbow Dash realized it wasn’t anything she’d said, but the fact that Fluttershy was fighting fit made that irrelevant. It was looking like there really would be a wedding today. “If that’s how you feel, I’m going to go tell the others and we can get this show on the road.” Rainbow Dash started towards the door before Fluttershy could change her mind.
“Yes… that is how I feel. I just need a few minutes to… compose myself.”
“Take all the time you need… even though you’ve taken plenty already.”
“Did you say something?”
“Stay positive!” Rainbow Dash closed the door behind her and let out a sigh she’d been holding in for around an hour now. After all the stress she’d undergone over whether or not she’d be able to come to this wedding, Rainbow Dash wasn’t about to let it not happen.
Fluttershy really didn’t need Rainbow Dash in order to go through with this. She could see this clearly now, even if her presence helped speed things along. At one point today, somepony would have posed the question of whether or not she wanted to actually go through with it today. Anypony could’ve been the catalyst. Deep down, Fluttershy knew what she wanted to do. Deep down, the girl had at least just enough in her to go through with this.
Rainbow Dash was suddenly aware of marriage and all its implications. She loved her friends and family, but there was something about how Fluttershy and Time Turner loved each other that was noticeably different. Perhaps there was no difference in the strength of the bond, the solidity of the love, the legitimacy of the relationship, but its mode of expression was something alien to her.
She had never wanted to express her love for somepony like that. She had seen plenty of ponies who wanted to, and she called them mushy, lovey-dovey, or annoying.
“Ponies are generally afraid of what they don’t understand. ” Her mother had told her this long ago when she was just a filly, but she wasn’t yet mature enough to appreciate it. It pained her to acknowledge, but Rainbow Dash realized her mother might be more right than she realized. If there was nopony to push her towards it, would she end up in a romantic relationship all on her own? Was she like Fluttershy, ready to seize the opportunity when it arrived?
Rainbow Dash didn’t know the first thing about romance. She understood the general idea, but the practice was completely beyond her. It was just like she could understand the concept of raising the sun, but she wouldn’t know where to begin in attempting it. Now here she was, thinking about how she might end up with a special somepony. She would have to put herself out there in ways she didn’t exactly feel comfortable with. She might have to say or do things she could not currently even imagine without feeling embarrassed. Was it really supposed to be so scary?
“If you’re not doing what you think is right, then you’re not doing it right. ”
“… I’m overthinking this,” Rainbow Dash said, calming herself down. Fluttershy had even said there may be no way to know you’re ready, and that didn’t just apply to marriage. Rainbow Dash puffed out her chest and went on with her business. If the day was going to come, then the day would come.
“Rainbow Dash?” Applejack said, snapping Rainbow Dash out of her trance. “Golly. Y’all look so depressed I wasn’t sure if I should come over or not.”
“Sorry. I was just thinking,” Rainbow Dash said, not ready to admit what she was thinking about. Luckily, Applejack wasn’t in the kind of mood to pry.
“Well stop thinkin’ about whatever it is yer thinkin’ about. One of our best friends just got hitched! It’s time to be celebratin’ and dancin’ and whatnot.” Applejack gave Rainbow Dash a few good nudges, but the pegasus didn’t liven up any. Still, the farmpony wasn’t about to let her gloom be infectious. “Be frumpy if you want, but this mare is goin’ back to the dancefloor. Wanna come along Taboo?”
“With you?” Taboo smiled and turned up to her mother. “Can I go?”
“Sure, just be careful.” Rainbow Dash said this, but then had to wonder briefly what kind of dangers could possibly be involved with being on the dance floor of the most tame wedding in Equestria.
“I call this one the wormhole!” Discord flopped onto the ground, which started to slurp him in until he completely disappeared along with a portion of the dancefloor.
“Don’t worry,” Applejack said to the now very worried Rainbow Dash. “I’ll keep her away from him.”
“That’d be great if you could,” Rainbow Dash said, waving the two off. She watched them go, disappearing into the crowd of dancing ponies. Now she really was alone, and that was dangerous considering how introspective she was feeling. She wasn’t always like this. She used to fly ahead without thinking overmuch about what was waiting for her or what got left behind, but now she had somepony else to look after. There wasn’t as much room for taking risks, not when she had somepony else counting on her. She was loyal before, but these days she felt ridiculously loyal.
“I thought this was a wedding, not a funeral.”
Rainbow Dash turned around. It took her a good moment to recognize Thunderhead standing behind her. He had forgone his armor for a collar and tie, but more than that he was in the appearance of a regular pegasus.
“Feeling lonely?”
“I most certainly am not!” Rainbow Dash got angrier than she intended to. She cleared her throat and collected herself. “Maybe just a little.”
“You did relinquish Taboo to your friend,” Thunderhead said, taking a seat next to her. “I take it she’s feeling better.”
“Yeah, she’s better.” Rainbow Dash took another look at how he was dressed. “No armor today?”
“I decided it couldn’t wait,” Thunderhead said, tugging at his tie. “I need to clear the air with Taboo. Maybe we can play this off while she’s still young and naïve.”
“Gutsy move.”
“Thanks… I think.” Thunderhead tugged some more at his tie, becoming increasingly frustrated with it. “I hate these things.”
“Not a fan of dressing up?”
“I’m not a fan of ties,” Thunderhead said, clarifying his stance. “Who thought this was a good idea? I don’t get fashion.”
“Me neither.” Rainbow Dash wondered if Rarity could explain how the tie came into being. There had to be some kind of history or logic behind it, logic that escaped Rainbow Dash. “It’s just a piece of cloth around your neck that hangs down.”
“All form and no function,” Thunderhead said, finally giving up on adjusting the accursed thing. “I thought napkin might be a good application, but I learned that was frowned upon when I was little.”
“Is that why you like armor?” Rainbow Dash asked. “It has a function?”
“Yeah, but I don’t think I’d wear it if it made me look absolutely ridiculous,” he replied. “Unless I absolutely had to. I think I’d have trouble trusting armor that looked silly. I dunno. I just wear armor; I don’t think about the design all that much.”
“Fair enough.” The conversation hit a wall. Rainbow Dash wondered where to go from there, but nothing seemed natural; however, she wondered why she cared all of a sudden. If she wanted to talk to Thunderhead, she could just open her mouth and speak.
On the other hoof, she realized she could do more than just talk to him. He had only just arrived, but her loneliness was nowhere to be found. He was a capable dancer too, meaning she could move out to the dance floor and actually participate instead of glaring the crowd down.
“Hey, do you want to-” Rainbow Dash cut off when she realized she didn’t exactly have Thunderhead’s full attention. For some reason, he was a whole lot more absorbed with his tie than he was earlier. She looked down and noticed that Taboo was hanging off the end of it, smiling up at the stallion she was slowly suffocating. “Taboo, get off of him!” She plucked the filly up and set her in her lap, but Taboo fussed and struggled.
“I wanna say ‘hi’ to daddy!” she complained, jumping out of Rainbow Dash’s chair and onto Thunderhead’s. She gave him a big hug and smiled, flapping her little wings merrily. “Hi daddy! I got better! *sniffle*” Taboo wiped her nose with a hoof, trying to make sure mommy didn’t notice.
“So I see,” Thunderhead said, still catching his breath. “Are you having a good time?”
“Yeah! It’s lots of fun!” Taboo said, bouncing up and down. “Can we go dance, daddy? Please, please, please?!”
It took a moment to click with Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead, but they realized there was something slightly off: Taboo still recognized Thunderhead. Even from the dancefloor, she had picked him out and come over here to greet him. For all their stressing and sweating over this, they found it hard to take solace in such an anticlimactic resolution. They looked at one another, wondering how they should go forward.
“Uh, yeah. Let’s hit the dancefloor,” Thunderhead said after a beat, a smile spreading across his face. If Taboo didn’t think anything was off, then there was no reason for him to act like there was anything wrong. He got up and let a giggling Taboo lead him out onto the floor.
Rainbow Dash could see the way forward had been decided for her. It looked like they weren’t going to discuss this further with Taboo, but instead they were going to go on as they always had. That being said, she also realized she was left all alone again. She put her chin in her hooves and furrowed her brow. She had let her chance slip away.
“Whoa, Rainbow Dash? You okay?” Applejack returned from the dancefloor to find Rainbow Dash in a deeper funk than before. “I saw Taboo run back over here. Where is she?”
“She went back to the dance floor with Thunderhead.”
“You don’t say,” Applejack said, turning to look for herself. She squinted, but she didn’t find who she was looking for.
“He’s not wearing his armor. He’s just in his normal form,” Rainbow Dash explained, revealing why Applejack couldn’t find the guard in the crowd.
“Wow. And Taboo still recognizes him?”
“Yeah.”
“And she still calls him daddy?”
“Yeah.”
“… Rainbow Dash?” Applejack got a mischievous grin on her face.
“What?”
“Are you jealous?”
“I am not!” Rainbow Dash retorted. Her friend rolled her eyes and strolled back to the dance floor, leaving the steamed pegasus on her own again. Rainbow Dash, for her part, just kept telling herself she wasn’t jealous. Thunderhead devoted a lot of time and energy towards making Taboo happy, but he hardly paid any attention to Rainbow Dash. The mare just felt underappreciated is all. At least, she snorted and kept telling herself something along those lines.
“I am not tired!”
“You sure look tired,” Thunderhead said, sitting on the floor with a quickly fading Taboo. “You’ve had a long day, so you should go to bed before you get sick again.”
“I’m fine,” Taboo said, insisting she could stay up. Rainbow Dash didn’t say anything, watching from the couch. Her tail swished absently. Thunderhead and Taboo had been carrying on and goofing off ever since they encountered one another at the wedding.
“You’re fine? Then what’s this?” Thunderhead said, poking her belly. Taboo giggled a bit. “This is telling me you need to go to bed.”
“I’m not tired. I’m just ticklish.”
“Really?” Thunderhead said, continuing to prod her and make her laugh. “I’m not so sure.”
“Ah-ha-ha! Stop it! Ah-ha-ha!” Taboo tumbled over in a fit of laughter while Thunderhead continued to tickle her.
“If you’re not tired, I’m just going to have to tire you out!”
“Ah-ha I’m n-not tired ah-ha-ha!”
“Well, I’ll just have to keep tickling you.” Thunderhead made good on his promise, continuing to assail the poor filly as she laughed uncontrollably. Rainbow Dash looked on, still not saying anything. She wondered when she just became a fixture in the room. They couldn’t possibly ignore her all night. He wouldn’t give her all the attention all night.
“Okay, okay! I’m tiiired!” Taboo finally gave in, which brought a stop to the tickling. Once she was able to catch her breath, Taboo righted herself and began to pout. She gave him a little push on his hoof in retaliation.
“Ouch,” he said, feigning injury while still smiling.
“That didn’t hurt,” Taboo said, still trying to be cross with him; meanwhile, Rainbow Dash was rolling her eyes. She knew Thunderhead could take a whole lot more abuse without complaint. He was tough, well built. He’s just being nice to Taboo. He’s always nice to her.
“No, you hurt me for sure,” he replied, but Taboo wasn’t having it. “C’mon, it’s time for bed.”
“… Will you tuck me in?” Taboo asked, grabbing on the the hoof she just attacked.
“Sure thing,” he said, picking her up. She giggled as he lifted her in a high arc onto his back. As a guard, he was more than strong enough to pick up a little filly like Taboo. Even so, Rainbow Dash was biting her lip for some reason. “Say goodnight to your mom.”
“Goodnight mommy!” Taboo said, waving as if she were about to go on a long trip. “I love you!”
“I love you too,” Rainbow Dash said, recovering from wherever she just was. Slowly, she slipped back into it as Thunderhead ascended the stairs with Taboo. She stayed on the couch, thinking. From her expression, it would’ve been hard to tell what was on her mind. She just sat there, absently flicking her tail. Thunderhead took note of this when he came back down.
“You still in a bad mood?” he asked, half joking and half not. He certainly wasn’t in a bad mood tonight. Things were actually going well for once.
“Sit down.” Rainbow Dash patted the vacant space of couch next to her. Thunderhead felt like he may have spoken too soon, but even so he complied and sat down. “You’re really nice to Taboo.”
“Uh… I guess I am.” Thunderhead had no idea what was going on. There were certainly no clues to be found in Rainbow Dash’s expression still. She kind of looked mad, but she didn’t really sound all that mad. He was treading dangerous waters.
“Are you that nice to everypony?” Rainbow Dash asked without any warning. The odd question caught Thunderhead off guard.
“Well… probably not.”
“What does a pony have to do to get treated like that?” These were not ordinary questions and Thunderhead was having trouble figuring out where she was going with this. He had hoped revealing his true nature to Taboo would diffuse some of the tension between them, but she’d been acting strange all night. Rainbow Dash should currently be in a very good mood with all current events considered, but instead she was sitting there with a passive expression putting Thunderhead through a gauntlet of bizarre questions.
“I don’t really know. I don’t think anypony has to do anything… maybe.” He didn’t know how to answer. If there was a right and wrong way to do it, he hadn’t the slightest idea which was which. He didn’t feel like standing trial like this for any longer. “Is something up? You’ve been kind of distant all night.”
“Yeah, that’s a good word for it,” Rainbow Dash said, putting a hoof to her chin. She was staring right at him, which made him all kinds of uncomfortable considering their close proximity and current solitude. It was already bad enough considering his attraction to her. “I guess I am jealous.”
“Jealous?”
“Everypony was right, and I really hate that.” Rainbow Dash leaned in close and batted her eyelashes. “I am so jealous right now.”
“Uh.”
“Can I try something?”
“W-what?”
Rainbow Dash pounced on Thunderhead, pinning him down on the couch and roughly locking lips with him. Thunderhead, for his part, was incredibly pliant considering how confused he was. The fact that he was currently making out with a very attractive mare was enough to make him just say “screw it” and get into it. He could tell Rainbow Dash was a very novice kisser, so he diverted all his attention to showing her how it was done.
He flipped their positions, putting her on the bottom with him over her. He kissed her like he was absolutely certain she’d never been kissed before, and he got the best response he could have hoped for. She hummed happily and wrapped her forelegs and his neck, holding on for dear life. She never really understood the deal with kissing up until this point, and she could feel herself getting hooked on it. Reluctantly, they parted to catch their breaths.
“You’re good at this,” Rainbow Dash said after a few pants.
“Yeah, well.” Before he could say anything else, he got pulled down for another round. He realized Luna wasn’t kidding when she said Rainbow Dash liked to go fast. He normally had to take a mare out on one or two dates before they kissed, so it was hard to believe his tongue was in Rainbow Dash’s mouth without having to even ask her out. The situation was getting awfully hot, and at this rate he could see it escalating into-
“Mooooommy.”
Without warning, Thunderhead found himself face down in the couch. He bolted upright to see Rainbow Dash lightly winging her way up the stairs. He wondered if what just happened actually happened at all, considering how quickly it ended. It was possible he fell asleep face first on Rainbow Dash’s couch and was now just waking up.
Rainbow Dash stopped at the top of the stairs. She turned her head, sending a sultry look Thunderhead’s way. She splayed her wings out and then strutted away with her butt wiggling behind her. The time for simply dreaming had come to a close.
9
Thunderhead slept peacefully, having passed out into a state of near-deathlike sleep. He was accustomed to being conked out on his bed back in Canterlot this early in the afternoon, so it was no surprise that he’d be sawing logs despite the activity around him. The majesty of Rainbow Falls in the daytime was entirely unable to keep him in the waking world. Not even the sensitive nature of the conversation happening right above his head even phased his barrier of slumber.
“And it all started just like that?” Rarity asked, leaned over towards Rainbow Dash just as far as she could stretch plus one inch. “I never pegged you for being so forward.”
“Yeah, neither did I.” Rainbow Dash still wasn’t very comfortable recounting the story of how she and Thunderhead became an item. Rarity’s eagerness piled on the wide-eyed looks from the rest of her friends weren’t really helping her come to terms. She wished Thunderhead was conscious; they could at least be embarrassed together. “I dunno, I just kind of exploded…”
“Y’all were probably bottling up your feelin’s,” Applejack said, offering up her explanation. “You finally burst under the pressure of it all and jumped on him in a moment of weakness. Y’all had been acting a bit strange that night.”
“I was not!” Rainbow Dash replied, her face growing hotter. “And I do not bottle up my emotions.”
“Yes you do,” Rarity said, contesting the obvious lie. The other mares chipped in their words of agreement, setting the record straight that Rainbow Dash did indeed hide and bottle up the things she was feeling often right up until the breaking point. She might call it being strong, but everypony else called in being stubborn.
“Whatever…”
“Anyway, you must tell us more.” Rarity wasn’t here to discuss the finer points of Rainbow Dash’s temperament; however, she technically wasn’t here to discuss her love life either. She was here to help celebrate Taboo’s birthday, but that took a backseat for the moment. Taboo was off somewhere playing with her friends anyway, so Rainbow Dash was trapped in this conversation whether she liked it or not. For the record, she didn’t like it.
“What else is there to tell?” Rainbow Dash already knew there was plenty to disclose, but it was more of a question of what she could get away with keeping private.
“Darling, you pounced on him all of a sudden in the night. Did you two do anything?” Rarity asked, getting right at the juicy bits.
“That seems a little too personal,” Twilight pointed out, but only blushing Fluttershy appeared to agree with her. The others looked ready to get the retelling in explicit detail.
“It doesn’t matter because we didn’t ‘do anything,’” Rainbow Dash replied, mocking Rarity on the last beat. “And we haven’t ‘done anything,’ so don’t ask.”
“Oh, how boring.” Rarity backed off, having lost almost all interest. “And here I thought you were serious about him.” Everypony had kind of forgotten that Thunderhead was physically present at the moment.
“We are so serious!” Rainbow Dash snapped back at her. “Just because we don’t ‘do anything’ doesn’t mean we aren’t serious. We’re way serious!”
“Sure, darling. Sure you two are.” Rarity smiled at her like she might smile at Sweetie Belle while explaining one of her latest plans to get her cutie mark. “And you can go ahead and say sex, darling. We’re all adults here.”
“I don’t have to say it!”
“Just say sex, RD,” Applejack said, supporting Rarity. “It’s more embarrassing to watch you beat around the bush.”
“There’s no reason to be embarrassed about sex, Rainbow Dash,” Twilight said with that look in her eye like she was about to jump into a lecture. “It’s perfectly natural act of procreation and pleasure between two ponies. I know the intimacy of the act makes it a bit embarrassing to talk about, but speaking about it in the general sense in an open, public way makes it easier to approach the act in a healthier way. We’re not here to judge you, but just know it comes off as a bit childish to try and cover up the subject matter by giving it a codename of sorts. We all know what you mean anyway, so why not just say it?”
“Wow Twilight, way to suck the fun out of that.” Rarity rolled her eyes, happy Twilight’s little speech had come to a close. Even if there wasn’t going to be anymore poking fun at Rainbow Dash, she still had questions that needed answers. “Establishing a relationship is all good and well, but when are you two ever going to have a proper romantic rendezvous?”
“What do you mean ‘a proper romantic rendezvous?’” Rainbow Dash asked, unfamiliar with the terminology.
“I think she’s askin’ when he’s gonna come and call on you like a courtin’ stallion would normally do,” Applejack said, attempting to clarify; however, this one went right past Rainbow Dash as well.
“She means to ask when you’re going on a date,” Twilight said, finally putting it into common parlance for Rainbow Dash.
“A date? How is hanging around my house not constitute a date?” Rainbow Dash asked. She hadn’t really considered going out on the town with Thunderhead up until this point. There wasn’t anything out there that she wanted to do with him that they couldn’t do on the couch.
“It’s good to get to know him outside the context of your house, darling,” Rarity said, arguing her case. “You go out with a stallion to movie or dinner or anything really so you can find out more about him.”
“What could I find out about him at a movie or dinner that I couldn’t find out at home?”
“Well… there’s plenty.” Rarity hadn’t expected to provide examples. She figured there wasn’t any specific tidbit of information any activity could unearth. Facts just followed with the experiences. She looked to her friends for help.
“Taking him to a movie could lead to conversations about certain worldviews,” Twilight said, pitching in to help her friend. “A good film always leads to good intellectual conversation. You wouldn’t want to be involved with someone who wouldn’t be able to see things through your eyes, would you?”
“Oh, and if you take him to dinner you might find out he eats like Twilight!” Pinkie Pie added in her two bits, much to Twilight’s chagrin.
“I eat like everypony else…”
“You eat like each meal is your first time seeing food,” Rainbow Dash said, backing up Pinkie Pie on this one. Twilight Sparkle had atrocious table manners for somepony who grew up in Canterlot; moreover, she had subpar table manners for somepony who was raised under a barn on the edge of reclaimed wilderness. “And besides that, I’ve seen him eat anyway.”
“I am a normal eater…”
“And we talk about books from time to time.” Rainbow Dash was seeing less and less a point to going on a traditional date. “We’re fine hanging around the house.”
“I think it would be nice for you two go out on a date,” Rarity said, but Rainbow Dash still wasn’t having it. The unicorn furrowed her brow and rephrased. “You need to get out of the house and away from Taboo for at least one night in your life. Go to dinner, go to a movie, go hang out on somepony else’s couch for all I care! You haven’t had a night out for yourself in two years, darling. Nopony will think any less of you for hiring a sitter and taking a personal night once and a while.”
“Look, I’m n-” Rainbow Dash had to stop when Rarity shoved her hoof into her friend’s mouth.
“No, no, no more objections,” Rarity said, tittering at her. “Just give it some more thought.”
“Spike, give up already.”
“No! This is ridiculous! She has to be around here somewhere,” Spike said, turning over the last of every stone for the eighth time. He had taken the tales of Taboo’s Hide-and-Seek prowess with more than a fair share of salt, but ten rounds in nopony had even managed to find a trace of her. Present company was used to extended searches for the filly, but Spike was taking it right up into the next level. “Ponies don’t just disappear!”
“Taboo does,” Pumpkin said, rolling her eyes and plodding right behind that dragon. “Just give up so we can start again. It’s Pound’s turn to count.”
“We’ve looked everywhere, Spike.” Pound halted right in his tracks and sat down. Pumpkin followed in suite, bringing the procession to a halt. The caboose of this procession, and also their current supervisor, took a seat as well.
“Well, I’m glad to see Spike getting so into the game,” Palette said, smiling over at the little dragon. “I mean, he was the one complaining that it was a kid’s game before we started.”
“It is a kid’s game,” Spike replied, turning about face to his halted captives. “But what we have here is a real mystery.”
“There’s no mystery about it,” Pound said. “She cheats.”
“You don’t know that,” Pumpkin said, starting yet another to and fro argument between the twins. Spike and Palette left them to that while Spike continued with his speech.
“I’m telling you, we’ve got to find her!” Spike puffed out his chest and assumed a pose of heroic inspiration with both arms rigid at his side. “She’s got a secret technique of hiding that we need to uncover. This could be the next big thing in Hide-and-Seek!”
“I think somebody is just having trouble admitting he’s been bested,” Palette said, causing Spike’s confidence to deflate. He did have to admit that he was starting to feel like he was just wasting his time.
“Yeah… well… I’ve never been good at this anyway.” Spike took another glance around for Taboo, but there was still no sight of her anywhere. Tired of his fruitless search, Spike gave the call for her to come out.
Spike’s voice broke through the silence of the afternoon. Taboo had been waiting for this call for what felt like forever, curled up in a patient lump. She had won again, and winning never got old. It was way too easy, so easy that she didn’t understand why everypony else didn’t do it. She just thought it was their loss as she underwent the process of getting back up.
She started at her tail, feeling each hair bristling as it was freed all the way up to the end. The joints on her hind legs were next next, allowing her to start pushing herself onto her stiff forelegs. The sensation of freedom hit her torso and quickly radiated up her neck and down to her hooves, allowing the filly to stand free and tall once again. She flicked her restless ears and stretched her wings a few times, both stiff from being unable to move for such a long period of time.
The transition was completed, and Taboo trotted her way towards the others. Every time she hid, it got a little easier. The longer she stayed that way, the more comfortable she became. She was a little young to understand or appreciate the zen-like state she had found, but then again she was even more so naïve to begin to understand the larger implications. When she rejoined the group they would ask her where she hid, and she would tell them the same place as before. If they weren’t so concentrated on where she hid, perhaps they would question how she hid.
Rainbow Dash and Taboo waved off Rarity and Pokey, the former of the former party happy she had managed to survive yet another wedding. In what can only be described as a miracle, the whole ceremony went off without a hitch. The weather was perfect, the bride was contented, the groom was confident, relatives didn’t bicker, the cake wasn’t destroyed, and Discord never showed up for reasons nopony cared enough to wonder about. Rainbow Dash was hoping that every wedding could go so well, and then the bouquet flew out of the back of the carriage and smacked her in the face.
“I’m tellin’ you, it’s a sure sign,” Applejack said for the umpteenth time. Rainbow Dash had already discarded the bouquet, citing once again that she didn’t believe in the dumb superstition. “If’n Thunderhead can stay awake long enough, you’ll end up walking down the aisle next, sugarcube.”
“It’ll happen when it happens.” Rainbow Dash wasn’t in any kind of hurry. The way things were now was enough for her. “Right now, I just want to get home and get out of this dress. I can’t stand this thing.”
“But it’s pretty!” Taboo contested, reveling in another chance to dress up. “And are we going home already?”
“Not right this second, bu-”
“Then I’m gonna go get more cake!” Taboo hopped off her mom’s back and headed off on her own.
“Hey, Taboo!” Calling after her didn’t do much good. Taboo was puttering around at high speeds these days, even if her wings weren’t part of the equation. She was really taking after her mother. “Jeez, there’s just no containing her these days.”
“She’ll be fine,” Applejack said, speaking the honest truth as usual. Barely anypony around would bug Taboo. This was a safe place, so there was no fear in leaving her alone for a bit. If things did get bad, Thunderhead was asleep somewhere around there anyway; however, Rainbow Dash realized she’d forgotten exactly where she had left him. “Besides, I got somethin’ I’ve been meaning to ask you about.”
“Really? Shoot.”
“You know that fancy restaurant in the middle of town, Mes Choux?”
“Never heard of it,” Rainbow Dash lied. She was already uninterested in whatever Applejack was going to say next. Rainbow Dash wasn’t a gourmet by any stretch of the imagination, unless being a nut about health food counted.
“The thing is that I’ve got this voucher for a free dinner for two there. I won it in a raffle at Applebloom’s school, instead of that handsome lookin’ jar of pickled beets.” Applejack produced the voucher in question out from under her hat, as if she’d been waiting for this exact moment all day. “I was wonderin’ if you wanted it.
“Why me?” Rainbow Dash had to ask, considering she wasn’t the only one of a two around these parts.
“Doesn’t matter why you. I just thought it’d be a nice opportunity for you and Thunderhead to do something other than watch each other sleep.”
Rainbow Dash nearly said no, but for the first time since she’d ever considered going on a normal date with Thunderhead she hesitated. Maybe it was because she’d been hit in the head with a quarter pound of white roses, but Rainbow Dash decided to what-if the situation.
“Okay, say I accept the voucher.” Even as Rainbow Dash said this, Applejack already looked like she was celebrating her victory. “Who is going to watch Taboo?”
“Well, it could be anypony,” Applejack said, thinking it was the simplest thing. “Anypony could do it.”
“Not just anypony,” Rainbow Dash pointed out. “If somepony is going to look after her at night, I want Taboo at home and in bed at her normal bedtime. I need a pegasus who can be up late, and I’m a little short on those.”
“There’s got to be somepony.” Applejack couldn’t believe there wasn’t a single pony in all of their acquaintances who wouldn’t do it. “You’re just looking for an excuse not to do it.”
“The bottom line is this, Applejack.” Time got slow for a moment. Everything fell silent as Rainbow Dash uttered her next sentence. “I need a foalsitter for Taboo. ”
Heeding the long awaited call to action, a figure flew out from the table next to the two mares. It made a few wonky loops around the two, stirring up a mild breeze as it made the moderately fast journey. Finally it landed, huffing and puffing only briefly, to stick out its chest before doubling back over to huff and puff some more.
“Scootaloo, what are you doing?” Rainbow Dash asked, shaking her head at the exhausted filly.
“I’m… answering the… call!” Scootaloo said, still catching her breath. “You said the magic words… to summon me!”
“Huh?”
“Scootaloo, are you okay?” Applejack asked, really concerned about the pegasus. “You didn’t get into the cider, did you?”
“What? No! I’m here to foalsit. I’ve been training for this day and waiting for this moment!” Scootaloo puffed out her chest and managed to keep it there this time; however, the sweat on her brow made it less impressive.
“That’s where you’ve been this whole time?” Rainbow Dash asked. “Waiting for me to say I needed a foalsitter?”
“Always lying in wait, always ready!”
“I doubt that’s the first time I’ve said that,” Rainbow Dash said, thinking back. “In fact, I know it’s not.”
“Well, I can’t always be hiding in wait,” Scootaloo protested, contradicting herself. “I’ve got things to do, and sometimes you went to Cloudsdale which is way too high up and far away for me to reach. Then I was sick for a week and I had to visit my grandma and then there was the time I saw this dog-”
“Alright, let’s forget all that.” Rainbow Dash tried to get things moving back on track. “You want to foalsit Taboo?”
“It’s my destiny!” Scootaloo was dead serious about all of this, if not just a bit overdramatic. Waiting for one’s moment to shine can do that to a pony. “I can stay in your house and keep an eye on her for as long as you need!”
“But you’ve never even met her,” Rainbow Dash said, reminding Scootaloo that her “vigilance” had made her uncommonly absent.
“That’s because I’m going to become the foalsitter now and forever for her, and so I had to keep my identity a secret until the right moment came!”
“Are y’all sure you’re feelin’ alright?” Applejack had to ask just one more time. Scootaloo was being more Scootaloo than usual. “Maybe you should sit down.”
“The only sitting I’ll be doing is foalsitting! … Nailed it.” Scootaloo was obviously taken with the whole fantasy she’d constructed for this exact moment in time. Rainbow Dash was impressed, if not a deal confused. She knew Scootaloo well enough to know she wasn’t the most reliable filly around, but if she was serious Rainbow Dash was inclined to trust her.
“So, you really want to do this?”
“Super sure!”
“Are you sayin’ yer gonna do it?” Applejack asked. Rainbow Dash nodded, signaling that Applejack was victorious. “Well, it’s about time!”
“Yeees! My time has come!” Scootaloo shouted to the sky. She pulled Rainbow Dash into a strangling bear hug. “I won’t let you down! You can count on me!”
“Wonderful, now please let go.” Rainbow Dash tapped the eager pegasus on the foreleg frantically for she was starting to see stars. Scootaloo complied, releasing Rainbow Dash to reunite herself with the sensation of breathing.
“This is awesome! I’ve got to go tell Applebloom and Sweetie Belle!” Scootaloo said, beaming from ear to ear. She turned to fly off somewhere else, but Rainbow Dash stopped her with a hoof on her shoulder. She turned the filly back around and faced her.
“Hey,” she said, rather sternly. Despite her best effort after that to remain stone faced, Rainbow Dash couldn’t help but crack a smile. “It’s good to see you.” For a rare couple of moments, the pair of pegasi dropped their respective cool acts and just hugged it out.
If Taboo had to pick her one favorite thing about weddings, cake would definitely be among the top contenders. Having finished off another piece, Taboo started looking around for her mommy. There weren’t too many ponies left around, so it was easy to find her mother talking with Applejack over where she left her. She started to head in that direction, but another sound caught her attention.
It wasn’t that loud or nearby, but Taboo could tell it was somepony crying. Curious, she changed course and followed the sound to its source. The sound lead her out and away from everypony else, to a secluded corner of the party behind where the DJ had been set up. She poked her head under a tablecloth, discovering the source of the waterworks.
“Spike?”
Spike jumped upon hearing his name. He quickly rubbed any moisture out of his eyes before turning around to face Taboo. It was still somewhat obvious that he’d been crying, but that hardly mattered since Taboo already knew what he was up to.
“Hey Taboo… what’s up?” He wasn’t sure how he’d been found, considering he went to great lengths to find a place nopony would bother him. He was comforted somewhat that it was only Taboo.
“Why are you crying?” Taboo asked, joining him underneath the table. “Does your stomach hurt?” It was hard for her to come up with many reasons somepony might be crying at a wedding reception. Her mommy had told her that sometimes ponies cry during the ceremony because they are happy, but that made even less sense to Taboo. There was something about the how and where Spike was crying that told her very clearly that he was not happy.
“No, my stomach is fine. It’s my heart that hurts,” Spike said to her. There wasn’t any point in hiding the truth. Pretty much anypony else would be able to figure out what had him upset. “You don’t have to worry about me. I’ll be fine.” Spike smiled at Taboo, but it didn’t seem to do anything to sway her.
“Why does your heart hurt?” Taboo had never known anypony’s heart to hurt before. She was actually even more concerned about Spike now that she knew it could.
“It got broken… or I guess it’s been broken and I’ve just been pretending it’s not.” Spike curled up into a tighter ball, hugging his knees close. He was tearing up a little again, but he kept talking through it. “I thought I could make it through today and just be happy for her, but it was too tough. Even if I tell myself it was never meant to be, it doesn’t really help.”
“Never meant to be?” Taboo still didn’t understand what was going on. It seemed to her that not only was Spike in a lot of pain, but he didn’t know why he was in pain any more than she did.
“I just want to get over her,” Spike said, getting right at the core of the problem. For all his hoping and all his trying, he’d wound up by himself. Despite his quiet acceptance and attempts to ignore his feelings, he still scorned the outcome. Now he would have to forever hold his peace, and right now that sounded like the worst possible thing.
Somepony sat right next to him and leaned against his shoulder. He’d almost forgot for a second that Taboo was with him right now, but now she was cuddling up next to him. She smiled up at him, her intentions unreadable behind her innocence.
“I don’t get why you’re sad,” she told him. It wasn’t exactly the most tactful or helpful thing to say at the moment, but Taboo was partially excused for her immaturity rendering her unable to properly empathize. Nonetheless, she spoke what comfort she could. “But it’s okay, Spike. You’ll be alright.”
“Thanks, Taboo.” It felt good to be comforted, but even better to be comforted by someone who couldn’t bring the problem back up. He was sure once he came out from under the table, everypony else would ask him about Rarity and how he felt about the wedding. He decided to just mope in Taboo’s company for just a little while longer. He thought that surely he had a right to just be sad for a while.
Thunderhead blinked his eyes open and groggily started coming back around to the sound of his own name. He’d just been making toast for his third grade teacher, but how he was face to face with Rainbow Dash in some setting he didn’t quite recognize. He slowly remembered that he was at Rarity’s wedding, but he couldn’t remember if she was married already or not.
“Are you awake?”
“Yeah… I’m awake.” Thunderhead was not fully awake. He wasn’t even close to awake, considering how deep in sleep he’d just been in. “What’s up?”
“We’ve been together for almost half a year now, right?” Rainbow Dash asked, trying to segue into her big question; however, Thunderhead wasn’t awake enough to understand that. From where he was sitting, Rainbow Dash just woke him up to find out how long they’d been making out on her couch.
“Yeah… that was last winter… now it’s summer… half a year.” Thunderhead closed his eyes, ready to get back to his precious sleep.
“So… don’t you think it’s about time we went on a ‘real’ date?” Rainbow Dash wasn’t sure how to phrase the question to make any more sense than that.
“Huh?” The question made even less sense to the drowsy stallion.
“Because Applejack gave me this voucher for a fancy dinner and Scootaloo said she’d foalsit Taboo for us…”
“… What’s a Scootaloo?”
“So I think maybe we should try it out.” Rainbow Dash wasn’t so much talking to Thunderhead as she was to herself at this point, and not just because the stallion was pretty much already back to sleep. She was on board with the whole thing seeing as all the pieces had fallen into place, but something about taking their relationship out of its normal context made her a bit uneasy. “We can just be like a normal couple for one night. I think that’d be nice.”
“Yeah, sounds good.” Thunderhead was totally on autopilot now. Sleep was taking him back into her sweet embrace and he was gone within moments.
“Alright… cool. We can do it next week,” Rainbow Dash said, getting up and leaving Thunderhead to sawing his logs and completely ignorant of the date he’d just made.
“But why can’t I come?” Taboo asked for what had to have been the thousandth time, following Rainbow Dash around at her hooves like a puppy. Rainbow Dash worked around her, finishing up her preparations for the night. Even if it was just Thunderhead, she decided she may as well put a little effort into her appearance since they were going to a fancy restaurant. “Mooommy!”
“This is just for daddy and me tonight. You’re going to stay here with a sitter, alright?” Rainbow Dash wasn’t exactly sure how explaining it that way over and over was going to solve the problem, but on the other hoof she wasn’t sure other avenues of reason were going to get through to Taboo.
“But I wanna go with you two,” Taboo said, following Rainbow Dash right at her heels as she went downstairs. “Why can’t I come?” It always came back around to the same question.
“It’s just for tonight, squirt. Besides, we’re going to dinner and you already ate. You wouldn’t like the food at this place we’re going anyway,” Rainbow Dash said, willing to make up just about anything to get Taboo to cooperate. “You can stay here and have fun with Scootaloo.” Right on cue, there was a rapid knocking at the door. Rainbow Dash winged over and opened it up with Taboo bringing up the rear. Scootaloo was standing outside, but for some reason she was standing with her back to the door.
“Did someone order a sitter?” She asked, turning around suddenly. Rainbow Dash could only stare at her while Taboo ducked behind her mother’s leg, only peeking out from around the edge to glare at Scootaloo.
“… Thanks again for doing this, Scootaloo,” Rainbow Dash said, stepping aside to let her in. Scootaloo proudly strode inside and looked around the room as if she’d never been inside it before. After finishing her fake inspection, she whirled around and faced Rainbow Dash.
“So, where’s the little ball of fun?”
“Right here,” Rainbow Dash said, dragging Taboo out of her hiding place. The closest she could get Taboo to Scootaloo was right up against her own foreleg, which Taboo grabbed and refused to let go. “Say hello to Scootaloo, Taboo.” Unsurprisingly, Taboo did no such thing. Not at all discouraged, Scootaloo got on Taboo’s level, which just made Taboo back off even more.
“Hi, I’m Scootaloo. It’s really cool to meet you, Taboo!” Even though she was genuinely excited to meet Taboo and smiling despite her desire to keep a straight face, her good vibes were not resonating with Taboo. The little filly just stuck out her tongue, but only briefly so her mother wouldn’t see. This was the moment Scootaloo first thought she might be in for an ordeal, but the thought only hung around for a second or two before Rainbow Dash called for her attention.
“She already ate, so you don’t need to worry about that. Make sure she’s in bed a little after sunset with her teeth brushed. I don’t want her having any snacks before bedtime, but she can have some juice or water if she gets thirsty. Sound good?”
“Yeah, sounds simple enough,” Scootaloo said, surprised at the rather short list of items Rainbow Dash had for her. It gave her a false impression of how complicated taking care of Taboo really was.
“And if anything happens you know where we are,” Rainbow Dash said, stressing this point the most. The last time she left Taboo with somepony else, something did happen. That something made her life a lot more complicated than before, so she’d rather avoid any life altering events tonight. “Don’t be afraid to come get us for any reason at all.”
“Pssht, you don’t have to worry.” Scootaloo got back down on Taboo’s level, who still wasn’t having any of it. “We’ll be just fine.” Before anypony could jinx themselves any further, there was another knock on the still open door.
“Anybody home?” Thunderhead said, chuckling at his own joke. Taboo instantly ran over and latched herself onto his front hoof. “Whoa, hey there kiddo.”
“Daddy, tell mommy that I’m coming with you tonight.”
Thunderhead looked up at Rainbow Dash, who managed to communicate to him all the strife she’d been through with just one peeved look. He figured Taboo might not take so well to them going out, but it was too late for them to back out now.
“Sorry, but it’s just me and mommy tonight,” Thunderhead said, patting Taboo on the head. “But I’ll tell you what, me and you can go out by ourselves one day and leave mommy with a sitter.”
“Don’t go!” Taboo wasn’t about to be swayed, but there wasn’t any time left to try and convince her. Thunderhead picked her up and gave her a kiss on the forehead and then set her down next to Scootaloo.
“We’ll be back this evening,” Rainbow Dash said to Scootaloo, sidling up to Thunderhead. She looked down at Taboo, who was refusing to look up at her backstabbing parents. “You two have fun while we’re gone, okay?”
“No problem,” Scootaloo said, saluting to the couple and seeing them out the door. “Don’t worry about a thing and just enjoy your night.”
“Thanks again, Scootaloo.” Rainbow Dash put her hoof on the doorknob and began to close it, but poked her head back in one last time. “Have fun, Taboo.” Taboo pretended not to hear her mommy as the door closed, finalizing her position as stuck with Scootaloo. Taboo turned sharply to look up at Scootaloo, who judging by the look the little filly’s face expected her to start crying.
“Aww, don’t worry. It’s okay,” Scootaloo said, reaching out a hoof to Taboo. Much to her surprise, the young filly ducked it. Taboo growled at her and then suddenly trotted off. She darted around the living room until she found Tank, who she promptly took up shelter behind. Tank, for his part, peeked out of his shell for a moment to see what was going on. Taboo scowled at Scootaloo over her reptilian battlements. “Don’t worry, Taboo. I’m not scary.” Scootaloo rose to approach Taboo, but that was a mistake.
“Don’t move!” Taboo shouted at her, daring to poke her head up from behind Tank to do so. Scootaloo stopped dead in her tracks, momentarily convinced that she was in some sort of danger. “You stay over there.” Taboo issued these orders then crouched back down to continue just scowling.
“W-why?” Scootaloo asked, completely and utterly at a loss. Taboo glanced away for a few seconds to think before rising to give an answer.
“You’re smelly!” That was all she said before ducking all the way down behind Tank. Scootaloo, who was completely unprepared for this level of directed hostility, became fully aware of what she was no doubt going to be in for the rest of the night.
Any mature pony would know that when dealing with an upset child that they must remain calm and remain the adult in the room. If one allows their emotions to take control, they aren’t any better than the child. A leveled an even response to bad behavior must be applied until the child willingly changes the problem behavior. All Scootaloo had to do was act her age, but that is not what happened.
“I don’t smell!” Scootaloo said as she dove headfirst to Taboo’s maturity level.
“Yes you do!” Taboo shouted back, not even putting forth the effort to look at her this time. “And you’re stupid!”
“I am not stupid!” Scootaloo could believe smelly, maybe. It was a bit of hard work to fly all the way up to the house so she might be a little sweaty, but she certainly wasn’t stupid*. “What do you know? You’re two years old.”
“You’re fat!”
“Now you’re just being petty.” The irony of her own statement did not strike Scootaloo.
“No I’m not!” Taboo shouted back, poking her head back up now that the gauntlet had been thrown down.
“Yes you are!”
“I can’t be because I don’t know what that is!” Taboo blew a raspberry at Scootaloo, who had apparently reached the end of her very short rope.
“Why you!” Scootaloo pounced on Taboo’s position, but the filly quickly scuttled out of the way and darted across the room. Scootaloo pursued her, starting a game of cat and mouse that was destined not to end well for her.
Coming to a restaurant on a normal date was just as bad of an idea as Rainbow Dash thought it was going to be from the get-go. On the surface, the place was perfect for a date. It had a quiet romantic atmosphere, delicious and beautifully presented food, and exquisite wine that the owner recommended and uncorked himself while explaining how celibate monks grew the grapes on the soft incline of a pristine mountain vineyard where the grapes received no more than six hours of sun a day and how at night the monks would sleep with the grapes in order to keep them from getting too cold while whispering encouraging words to them which is how the wine gets it’s mild, fruity aftertaste. It wasn’t the restaurant’s fault at all, but rather the two ponies who were in it.
Since their arrival, the pair had scarcely said two words to each other. The mood was pervaded by awkward silence that neither party was able to gap. Even with a modest amount of celibate mountain monk wine in their systems, there was a profound absence of social interaction. The worst part was, neither one could put a hoof on what it was. They were certainly enjoying eating out at this very fine establishment, but the pony poised at the other end of the table put them in a difficult position. With the meal concluded and the wine running low, something had to give.
“What’re we doing?” Thunderhead asked.
“… Drinking?” Rainbow Dash raised her half empty glass, trying her best not to confront what was going on. The look on Thunderhead’s face told her that he was serious, so she put the glass down. “I guess we’re not cut out for normal couple stuff.”
“No kidding.”
“Wow, way to jump right on board with that one,” Rainbow Dash said, turning on the stallion across the table.
“Let’s not kid ourselves, Rainbow Dash. We’re not exactly normal couple material. We came together under some pretty extraordinary circumstances.”
Rainbow Dash hated to admit it, but Thunderhead had a point. They came here under the pretense that they would have a normal romantic experience. Truth be told, they were probably past normal from go. Even so, there was something about all of it that didn’t sit well with Rainbow Dash.
“If it wasn’t for Taboo… do you think we would’ve ever ended up together?” she asked, perhaps slightly emboldened by wine and somewhat vulnerable in a different environment. “Because I don’t know how it would’ve worked out otherwise.”
“Maybe it would’ve happened, maybe not, but none of that is important.” Thunderhead scooted closer to Rainbow Dash so he could grab her hoof. “I love you, and I love Taboo. I didn’t get into this because I wanted a mare to eat fancy food with and drink wine with. If I was going to I would certainly do it with you, but this all started for me because I found a filly who needed protecting and a mare who stayed strong and defiant no matter what happened to her. I’ve built up an entire life around you two, and I wouldn’t give it up for all the magic in Equestria. Other ponies can have their fancy date and fancy dress kind of romance. It doesn’t suit me and it doesn’t suit you. We’ve got plenty of time to become normal and boring later.”
“Well,” Rainbow Dash said, chuckling as she put her other hoof on top of Thunderhead’s. “You’re awfully talkative all of a sudden… not that I’m complaining. You said a lot of nice things.”
“Yeah, it’s just… it’s just…”
“Wine?”
“Maybe… but, no,” Thunderhead still looked super serious, which Rainbow Dash wasn’t quite used to. It was making her heart pound a little faster. “I just feel like we’re wasting our time with this. Rainbow Dash, I love you.”
“I love you too.”
“Then let’s get married.”
For a brief second, Rainbow Dash felt as if her chair had been pulled out from under her and she was falling very slowly. She just stared at Thunderhead, bug eyed and blushing profusely. Her brain was shocked right out of operation, leaving the whole show to her rapidly beating heart.
“W-wait! Is this the actual thing?” she asked, her voice cracking from the strain of not crying. “This isn’t a ‘down the road let’s get hitched’ kind of thing, but a ‘we should do this right now’ kind of thing?”
“I’m proposing to you.”
“Right now?”
“As we speak,” Thunderhead said, still smiling despite his own heart having picked up the pace quite a bit.
“B-but this is all wrong! You’re not doing it right!” Rainbow Dash said, not sure exactly why she was complaining. She wasn’t exactly sure of anything except for one certain fact. “Screw it! Yes! Let’s do it!” Rainbow Dash embraced her new fiancée, beaming straight across her face as teardrops welled up in the corner of her eyes. Ponies at nearby tables, who could’ve only missed the whole display if they were deaf and blind, applauded the pair.
“Nopony is going to let me live this down,” Rainbow Dash said, having regained enough of her composure to enjoy the humor of the situation.
“I expect we’re going to spend the rest of our lives not living this down. That okay with you?”
“Yeah, I think I can manage.”
The sound of Scootaloo’s quill scratching against parchment was amplified by how tight her quarters were while the only competing sound was her own breath. She wrote frantically, sweat dripping down onto the page as she went along. When she finished, she dropped her quill onto the ground and lifted the note to her face with shaky hooves. The swallowed back her resolve and read it aloud.
“My dearest Rainbow Dash, I’m afraid my campaign in this foreign land has come to an end. The enemy overpowered us too easily and too quickly. This is the hazard of war, I’m afraid. One day you’ll understand, but right now I just want you to know that I’m sorry that I failed you. If zeal for the cause and my love for you could win battles then there would’ve been no enemy that could’ve bested me. Alas, it seems it was that passion that led to my demise here today. If I could turn back time, there are so many things I would change. Oh, if only I could turn back time to see your face once again. Be happy in the life you lead, Rainbow Dash. Please, do not forget me or my sacrifice here today. Yours forever, Scootaloo.”
Somepony lifted off the cushion acting as the roof on Scootaloo’s tiny fort.
“Uh… whatcha got there, Scootaloo?” Rainbow Dash asked, smirking a little as she looked down at the bug-eyed pegasus.
“… Nothing.” Scootaloo hid the note behind her back seeing as she couldn’t eat it while Rainbow Dash was watching. “How was dinner?” she immediately asked, desperate to change the subject to something saner.
“Oh, I’d say it went pretty well,” Rainbow Dash said, looking back at Thunderhead and making eyes at him. Thunderhead made eyes back at her, the two sauntering up to each other to share an affectionate nuzzle. Scootaloo was glad they were so taken with each other, seeing as if they were objectively looking around the house they would surely notice it looked like a bomb had gone off. Tank sat overturned in the very epicenter of the explosion, his little tortoise legs flailing in the air. Cushions and pillows were strewn everywhere with blankets draped over furniture and large sections of the floor. Books formed makeshift blockades, most of which had been broken through. A bowl of fruit sat upset upon the coffee table.
“Where’s Taboo?” Thunderhead asked as he put his foreleg around Rainbow Dash’s shoulder.
“Uh, about that.” Scootaloo was starting to feel a bit hot under the collar. “She’s not in bed…”
“Obvioiusly,” Rainbow Dash said with a laugh. Scootaloo realized they did see the wanton destruction of the room, but they apparently didn’t care.
“Wow, your date must’ve been really good.”
Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead looked at each other and smiled.
“She’s around here somewhere,” Scootaloo said, hopping on out of her fort. “Hey, Taboo! Your parents are back!”
On the other end of the room, Taboo popped up from behind another makeshift fort with a pot on her head like a helmet. Taboo’s stuffed bear also popped up wearing a colander on its head. Taboo suspected that Scootaloo’s claim was just another plot to get her to go to bed, but one look proved that her so called foalsitter wasn’t lying.
“Mommy! Daddy!” Taboo abandoned her fort and comrade to embrace her parents. Judging from her enthusiasm, you would think she hadn’t seen them in months. “You came back!”
“Of course we came back, squirt,” Rainbow Dash said, reaching down to hug her close with Thunderhead. “And we’ve got a big announcement to make.”
“Are you finally getting married?” Taboo asked. Her perception stunned Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead.
“Uh… actually, yeah,” Rainbow Dash said, disappointed she’d been robbed of making the dramatic announcement to Taboo. There was still everypony else, but she’d been looking forward to surprising Taboo.
“No way! That’s so cool!” Scootaloo cheered before joining in on the group hug all of a sudden.
“Well, it’s about time!” Taboo let out a frustrated sigh and rolled her eyes, a mannerism that was so amusingly Rainbow Dash-ish that Thunderhead couldn’t help but snicker. “No laughing! We’ve got to get serious here! There is a lot of planning we need to do.”
“Okay, bossy,” Rainbow Dash said, mussing up Taboo’s mane. “But before we do that, somepony needs to clean up this mess.”
“It was all her!” Taboo pointed an accusing hoof at Scootaloo.
“What? You did most of this!” Scootaloo pointed right back at her. The conflict may have erupted anew if Thunderhead hadn’t spoken up.
“Doesn’t matter who made the mess because you both are going to help each other clean it up.”
There were complaints from both parties and stern looks from the adults in the room, but the house was eventually restored to its natural order. Scootaloo was sent home, but not before she got Rainbow Dash to promise that she was first her list of ponies to call when she needed a foalsitter. After that, Taboo insisted they go over wedding plans while her parents insisted she go to bed. A compromise was made wherein Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead stayed by her bed while she discussed her wild and imaginative plans until she got tired and fell asleep. As excited as she was, it didn’t take all that long once she’d lain down. After that, Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead retreated downstairs to speak more realistically.
“So…”
“So.”
Neither of them was exactly sure where to begin. This wasn’t planned at all, so even between the two of them they didn’t have a complete plan yet.
“Are you… going to live here, then?” Rainbow Dash asked. This issue was just one of many that she realized she now needed to discuss with Thunderhead.
“Even if you were allowed to, I don’t think living in the barracks is ideal,” Thunderhead said. “Speaking of the barracks, it probably doesn’t make any sense for me to be acting as a guard anymore. I’ll probably get a new assignment. Hope it isn’t too far from here.”
“Does that mean you won’t be nocturnal anymore?”
“Possibly,” Thunderhead said as he scratched his head. “I don’t really know. I can take it up with Luna directly when I get back in the morning.”
“Oh, the morning.” Rainbow Dash didn’t want to think of all that was going to happen when she announced her engagement to everypony tomorrow. With all the excitement, she could hardly figure out how she was going to sleep tonight. “This is gonna be a big hassle, isn’t it?”
“No kidding,” Thunderhead said, sharing in her stress. “Not to mention expensive.” Both parties suddenly realized there was a whole financial side to getting married. After some detailed math involving how much money they had along with the money they’d saved and some speculating about what they would want and need for a wedding minus what they felt comfortable asking their parents to help pay for, they came to an embarrassing conclusion.
“We might have enough money to have a modest wedding by this time next year,” Rainbow Dash said, slamming her head into the couch. “Why are we so poor?”
“Single mom and soldier aren’t exactly careers you get into for the money,” Thunderhead said, pointing out exactly what Rainbow Dash didn’t want to hear. She glared at him, letting him know he’d better have something useful to add on to the end of that. “Uh, look, since I won’t be needing room and board from the castle anymore I bet I’ll get a pay raise on my reassignment. I’ll be making more money.”
“Aaargh!” Rainbow Dash wanted to punch somepony, so she punched Thunderhead.
“You know we don’t really need a wedding,” Thunderhead told her. “We could just go to Town Hall and get it over with that way.”
“And disappoint Taboo?” Rainbow Dash brought up her main concern in all of this. After being at Roseluck’s, Fluttershy’s, and Rarity’s weddings the little filly had certain expectations about how a wedding should go. “No, we need to start making money.”
“Easier said than done.”
“-along with a bonus for a job well done, and one for completing your job as asked… and one just because I like you,” Luna said. Her steward stacked bits high as Thunderhead looked on in dumb amazement. “It’s not enough for a wedding, but it should certainly speed things up.”
“I’ll say. With all of this, we could easily get married before Hearth’s Warming!” Thunderhead almost felt guilty about accepting so much money, but it was only almost. The thought of how much it would cheer up Rainbow Dash made him totally okay with it. Besides, he had completed his special assignment from the Princess herself with flying colors. He welcomed a little pat on the back, as long as Luna didn’t arbitrarily raise his rank again.
“I’m also making you a second lieutenant.”
“What?!”
“It’s crucial I do so for you reassignment,” Luna said, her tone becoming more serious. “What? You thought your new salary came with another cushy watchdog task?”
“Well, no, but-”
“Good, then we’re on the same page.” Luna wouldn’t allow Thunderhead to get a word in edge-wise. “You’re going to take charge of a joint nighttime response team with an officer from a separate outfit. Half of your subordinates will be night guards while the other half will be from the other outfit. I’ve been searching for somepony to replace the pony I used to have in charge after he complained so many times to be transferred. Can I count on you to stick with it, lieutenant?”
“Yes, ma’am!” Thunderhead said, snapping into military mode in an instance. It looked like he was still going to be nocturnal for the time being, but the change in pace was certainly acceptable. A response team’s job was to make special patrols outside of the normal patrol grids and dispatch at a moment’s notice to emergencies when needed. Thunderhead heard it could be very fast paced, but that didn’t worry him too much. Nothing could be more fast paced than Rainbow Dash. His only curiosities were what this other outfit was and why the previous leader wanted to be transferred so badly.
“Then you’re dismissed. It’s way too early to discuss this any further.” Luna got up and headed out. Thunderhead turned to follow her, but a steward suddenly dropped two saddle bags in front of him.
“What are these?”
“Those are your belongings,” Luna said, still on her way out. “I sent somepony down to fetch them. No need to thank me.”
“You mean I’m moving out today?”
“More like right now.” The door creaked shut behind Luna, leaving Thunderhead alone with his baggage. He turned to the two stewards who were left, but they didn’t seem terribly interested in his plight.
“Um… can I get some help with these?” Thunderhead asked, stuck in an odd position. One of the stewards just shrugged and trotted off while the other plopped a sack full of Thunderhead’s bits next to his belongings before leaving. “… Thank you. Thanks… looks like it’s up to me to haul all of this to Ponyville by myself… in the early morning… when I should be asleep.”
“So I find him totally passed out in front of the house,” Rainbow Dash said, finishing up her story of all the insanity that had transpired since last night. Her friends just stared at her with their mouths dropped wide open, even Pinkie Pie. Even miles away, despite her not being present, Rarity felt a sudden twinge of shock. The library was completely quiet, save for the sound of Taboo flipping through a picture book somewhere upstairs.
“… You guys don’t do anything halfway, do you?” Twilight said after a sizeable pause.
“I wouldn’t have it any other way.” Rainbow Dash smiled smugly and reclined in her chair. “So that’s what I did last night. What about you girls?” Everypony just looked around at one another, not exactly ready to take up the challenge of following up Rainbow Dash’s crazy story.
“Well, congratulations,” Applejack said, steering the topic back on track. “I’m real happy for you both.”
“Yeah! That’s super-duper awesome!” Pinkie Pie jumped up on the table and threw a hoofful of confetti onto Rainbow Dash. “I’m gonna throw you a huge engagement party! No, wait, better idea! I’m gonna throw you an enoooormous engagement party! Boom. Now who doesn’t do things halfway?”
“Thanks, but I’ll settle for just this, Pinkie Pie,” Rainbow Dash said, but Pinkie Pie was hardly phased. She could still just throw and enormous party for no reason at all. “Right now, I think I’d like to take things slow.”
“Rainbow Dash taking it slow, eh? Seems unlikely,” Applejack said.
“So Thunderhead has moved in with you?” Fluttershy asked. “How is that going to work since you two don’t… you know.”
“Not even an issue,” Rainbow Dash said, having already figured this out. “We don’t even sleep at the same time, so we can totally share a bed. The best part is that it’ll never get cold.”
“I guess I hadn’t thought of that.” Fluttershy put a hoof to her mouth to hide her sheepish smile. “But it is rather nice to sleep in the same bed as somepony… especially when there’s a storm.” Some things never change.
“If’n you don’t mind me sayin’,” Applejack started to say, clearly indicating whatever she was about to say was going to be something Rainbow Dash was going to mind. “I reckon y’all could go ahead and consummate your relationship. Yer practically married as it is and you already have a kid.”
“I have my reasons for doing what I do,” Rainbow Dash said, still refusing to budge on the issue.
“All I’m sayin’ is you’re gonna do it eventually.”
“Yeah, and it will happen eventually.” Rainbow Dash really didn’t want to discuss this any further; however, if her friends insisted on this topic she would gladly turn it right back on them. “You guys sure didn’t pressure Fluttershy this much.”
“I think the reason why goes without sayin’,” Applejack said, not wanting to observe the double-standard.
“And I’m… uhm… grateful for that…”
“And what about the three of you?” Rainbow Dash said, addressing the three mares who weren’t spoken for yet. “Any plans to even get into a relationship?”
“Okay, you’re the last pony who should be playin’ that card.” Applejack sure had a point, but she only brought it up because Rainbow Dash did have somewhat of a point herself. “And besides that, there ain’t anypony I’m interested in. It’d be nice if there was somepony interestin’ around, but there ain’t so that’s that.”
“Whatever,” Rainbow Dash said, rolling her eyes. “What about you, Twilight?”
“M-me?” Twilight began stammering and acting like nopony could possibly know why. “No, no plans or prospects. Just… waiting to bump into somepony!”
“Uuuh-huh.” Rainbow Dash turned to the last single pony at the table, who seemed the least likely candidate for a relationship due to her questionable level of maturity. “Do you even ever think about relationships, Pinkie?”
“Nope, not ever!” Pinkie admitted this rather freely. She truthfully lost no sleep over the subject and spent an uncountable few moments thinking about it while awake. “I’ve got all my friends to keep me company, so I really don’t ever think about having a super special friend like that!”
“I believe it.” Rainbow Dash could only remember one incident recently where it seemed like Pinkie Pie was even remotely interested in somepony like that, but the party pony denies the event even transpired in the first place. Thus, Pinkie Pie continued to be an enigma. “So you all don’t get to tell me how to run my relationship-slash-engagement.”
“Honestly, that was all Applejack,” Twilight said, pointing her hoof at the cowpony. “She was the only one pushing for it.”
“Now hold up!”
“You were the one nagging her about it.” Pinkie Pie joined in on throwing Applejack under the bus on this one. “I think whatever you and Thunderhead choose to do is super, Dashie!”
“Yeah, that’s how I feel,” Twilight said. “What you’ve chosen to do appears to be working just fine for you and Thunderhead, so I think it’s up to your discretion on how to proceed.”
“Aww, horseapples! Ya’ll sound like my brother!” Applejack said, leaning back into her chair and tipping her hat over her eyes. “Fine, whatever. Do what you want.”
“That’s all I wanted to hear,” Rainbow Dash said, satisfied with her victory today. There was still that one thing eating at her. “But what I want to do is hurry up and get married.”
“If you need money, we could always-” Rainbow Dash didn’t let Twilight finished.
“No, Thunderhead and I already decided to do this on our own,” Rainbow Dash said, standing firm on this point as well. “We know what our goal is, and now it’s just a matter of time and money. If it’s just this one time, let us be stubborn so we can say we did this on our own.”
“Fine, fine, but that means you don’t get to complain about waiting since you’re imposing it on yourselves,” Twilight said, pointing out exactly what Rainbow Dash didn’t want to hear.
“Okay, I get it.” Rainbow Dash sighed in defeat. She wanted to complain and she wanted to complain real bad. She wished she could just settle on the simplest, cheapest, and fastest path to matrimony, but then it wouldn’t be the way somepony was hoping for with all their heart. “Just gotta do it for Taboo.”
Thunderhead was on his first night of his new assignment. Beyond having to go through the struggle of relocating himself to Rainbow Dash’s house last morning, he miraculously managed not to hit any more bumps. Sleeping peacefully by himself in Rainbow Dash’s big comfy bed was a welcome change from the cramped barracks surrounded by other snoring stallions. Waking up at her house to a nice meal with his two favorite girls was an astronomically large step up from dragging himself into the cold mess hall for a subpar meal. When he had arrived on the job, Thunderhead was already feeling optimistic about the future.
The introduction to his subordinates went by rather quickly, but they appeared to be a capable lot of ponies who were ready to do work. He was respected, saluted, and his sergeants even called him “lieutenant” a couple of times. Thunderhead felt good being in charge, and he certainly thought he could get used to it. The officer he directly reported to was a nice gal as well, an older mare who told him she’d been overseeing and training patrol squads for twenty years. She spoke highly of Thunderhead’s position and offered her services if he ever needed anything.
Now that he was briefed, Thunderhead only had to report to the joint commanding officer, the pony who was running this whole show with him from another outfit. Thus far, Thunderhead couldn’t tell why anypony wouldn’t want this job. Maybe it got a little more hectic out in the field, but he figured that came with most jobs in the soldiering business.
Trotting down the castle’s hallways, he finally found where the other outfit was supposed to be waiting for him. He noticed two things were off about the door he was faced with. The first thing was the door was unmistakably among the barracks and belonged to some sleeping quarters. The second thing was that under the placard indicating the owners of the room the words “Please Observe Quiet” were written in large lettering where it would be clearly visible. Curious, Thunderhead knocked on the door.
There was a bit of shuffling behind the formerly dead quiet door. Thunderhead waited and waited, but nopony answered. He knocked again, and this time he was answered by a stallion hastily opening the door.
“Do you have any idea what time it is?” the bleary eyed pegasus asked, glaring at Thunderhead.
“Apologies,” Thunderhead said, noting that the pony he was addressing was still wearing his pajamas. “I’m looking for Lieutenant Soarin’. Is he… awake?”
“Yes, he is now. I’m Soarin’,” the pegasus replied. “Why? What? Is there an emergency?”
“No, I’m the new joint leader of our unit, Lieutenant Thunderhead.”
Soarin’ stared at him blankly, looking very displeased with being awoken.
“Is that all?” he asked, closing the door a little.
“Well, we’re about to go on patrol, and-”
“That’s great, but we don’t patrol with you guys,” Soarin’ said, surprising Thunderhead. Nopony had mentioned this to him. “Look, we’re Wonderbolts, not night guards like you guys. We’re still on sun time, so you come get us if you need us for an emergency.”
“… That’s all you’re here for?”
“That’s all.”
“That’s ridiculous!” Thunderhead could see why his predecessor got so upset now. “You’re telling me that your half of the unit stays here and sleeps while the rest of us go out and work?”
“That’s it,” Soarin’ said, smiling for the first time. “Pretty sweet deal, right?”
Thunderhead restrained himself from answering that question.
“Yeah, Wonderbolts have to be on call at all hours, but we don’t have the numbers or the reason to have a group exclusively operating at night,” Soarin’ explained. “Technically you guys are our representatives, going out and helping while we can’t. We’re only here to deploy of things get real dicey.”
“How dicey?” Thunderhead dared to ask.
“Like… crisis level dicey.”
“Wouldn’t an emergency of that level merit a full response from the Wonderbolt’s Headquarters at any hour anyway?” Thunderhead got a nod of confirmation after Soarin’ pondered the question for a few seconds. “Then what’s the point of you being here?”
“Uh... hmm.” Soarin’ started thinking and thinking. Thunderhead had to wait a whole minute and a half before he got an answer. “Extra barrack space?”
“… Go back to sleep, lieutenant.”
Soarin’ didn’t argue with Thunderhead on that point. He just saluted and closed the door as quietly as he could. Thunderhead turned around and went back to his half of the team, which he now knew was the only half that mattered. Even though he was pretty now that the only reason his job existed is because Luna wanted some kind of command over the Wonderbolts somehow and came up with this nutty idea. He ground his teeth and muttered curses to himself, but before he reached his destination he heaved a sigh and told himself the only thing he needed to hear for motivation.
“Just… do it for Taboo.”
Author's Note
* : Scootaloo's views do not necessarily reflect the views of the author.
10
Rainbow Dash stood there, commendably stoic considering the fervent tumult rising about her. Despite everything that had happened so far, despite all the stupidity and carelessness, despite blame falling so perfectly onto so many different heads, she at the moment found not even a single shred of anger in her present state. Time seemed to slow down as she accepted the inevitable, as it all came crashing in around her.
Thunderhead stood next to her, appropriately shocked as he gazed out over the crowd gathered before the altar. In front of her, Taboo stood with captivated interest as she gazed into the dead center of the whole debacle. Hooves, tails, mane and fur flew every which way at the final climax of this entire disaster. There was hardly a spectator among them, everypony involved in one way or another down on the floor. It was an astounding sight to see, without a doubt.
Rainbow Dash cast an eye to her left. A stubby legged dog stood and watched her, a small box secured in its jaws. She thought backwards, to how this all started. She thought back to that very morning.
Rainbow Dash had barely slept last night. There was a laundry list of reason why, but the short version was that she knew she would be getting married once she woke up. A little excited and a little nervous, she had whittled most of the night away squirming about in anticipation. Waiting did not suit her, it never did. Thunderhead, on the other hoof, had managed to get in his rest before the big day. He seemed capable to sleep through everything and anything, something he had already abundantly proved to Rainbow Dash even before this week. In an attempt to temporarily adjust to not being nocturnal, he had been sleeping at the same time as her in the same bed for the time being. It had been awkward at first for Rainbow Dash, but she quickly discovered it was basically like sleeping next to a big rock. For the night, she was on her own to be frantic.
Luckily, the morning brought with it a sympathetic soul.
“Moooommy!” Taboo came bursting into the room. “It’s today! It’s today!”
“Yeah, don’t remind me.” It wasn’t that Rainbow Dash wasn’t looking forward to it, but there was plenty to be worried about at the same time. Today wasn’t just the day she was getting married, but everypony who was going to attend would be showing up en masse today. For one reasons that still eluded Rainbow Dash, Thunderhead’s friends and close relations were only interested in hanging around the day of the wedding. Rainbow Dash’s folks had come into town early to help out and of course Rainbow Dash’s friends were around, but today the numbers would be practically tripled. It wasn’t going to be a huge crowd, but it was certainly going to be big enough for Rainbow Dash.
“Let’s go! Let’s go!” Taboo shouted as she jumped up and down on her parent’s bed. Rainbow Dash wasn’t sure where Taboo was trying to get her to go, but she rolled out of bed anyway. Before moving to exit the room, she picked up the ladle and frying pan from next to her bed. She held them high over Thunderhead’s sleeping mass and began to smash the two metal objects together.
“Hunh? Wha? I’m up!” Thunderhead shot up after a few good bangs, awake and alert. This was the only way to wake him up before he was ready that Rainbow Dash had found. Taboo complained that she didn’t like it, but it wasn’t really for her sake anyway.
“C’mon, let’s get a move on,” Rainbow Dash said, discarding her wake-up implements. “We’ve gotta start getting ready before everypony starts showing up.”
“Don’t you think we’re getting a little ahead of ourselves?” Thunderhead asked her as he reluctantly left the bed. “Nopony is going to show up until later.”
“Somepony is here already,” Taboo said without missing a beat. Both of her parents gave her a look. “He’s downstairs.”
Faster than a drop of a hat, the two adult pegasi took to their wings and made a beeline straight for the downstairs den. In a flurry of wind and upset furnishings, they both arrived at the lower floor in the blink of an eye to confront whatever intruder had managed to get inside the house.
“Nice entrance.” There was an odd pegasus sitting in their kitchen, and he was eating their cereal. This was evidenced by the milk that was in his scraggily beard and moustache, and additionally by the fact that he had a bowl in front of him that he was eating from. He chewed laconically, completely unconcerned with the two ponies before him.
“Uncle Chance?” Thunderhead asked, recognizing the old pony. “How the heck did you get in here?”
“Door.” The bearded pony indicated to the front door, which stood securely shut and locked.
“You broke in?” Thunderhead had a lot of questions for his uncle.
“Kinda.” Cloudy Chance resumed staring at the pair while he chewed his cereal. There was no clear path to proceed at the moment. “There’s a tortoise in here.”
“Uncle!”
“Yeah, yeah, I get it.” The older stallion finally stood up faced the couple seriously. “Sorry for barging in unannounced, but the place was easier to find than I anticipated. I didn’t know where to go exactly, so I let myself in.”
“You can’t just break into our house, Uncle,” Thunderhead said, but he followed this reprimand up with a defeated sigh. He already knew that there was no getting through to this pony. “Okay, introductions. Uncle Chance, this is my fiancée, Rainbow Dash.”
“How’s it going?” Chance extended a hoof to shake, which Rainbow Dash reluctantly took.
“Dash, this is my Uncle, Cloudy Chance. He’s a… he’s an eccentric.”
“Hey, that’s no way to introduce your elder.” Chance’s counter was severely discredited by his previous behavior. “I’m not some eccentric, I’m a fortune teller.”
“A fortune teller?” Rainbow Dash was surprised a pegasus would have that kind of occupation. Looking into the future was more of a unicorn kind of thing.
“Of course. Would you like a reading right now?” Chance asked.
“Well, I guess I wouldn’t mind ha-”
“Dash, no,” Thunderhead said, taking his fiancée aside. “Do not get your fortune told by him.”
“Why not? It’s just harmless fun, right?”
The look on Thunderhead’s face said otherwise. “His fortunes have a way of… well, coming true.”
“Seriously?” Rainbow Dash was surprised by how certain Thunderhead sounded. “That actually kind of makes me want a reading more.”
“His fortunes are also generally incredibly bad.”
“Oh?” Rainbow Dash could tell Thunderhead was being serious, even as ridiculous as his claims sounded. On any other day, she might have disregarded his council and gone ahead with it, but considering what was going on today she figured the last thing she needed was to jinx anything. “Okay, I guess I won’t let him tell my fortune then.”
“Splendid, let us read your future then.”
Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead turned around with a start to see Taboo and Chance sitting down at the table across from one another. Chance began shuffling his deck of card while Taboo sat quietly by with a big smile on her face.
“Taboo!” Both of her parents immediately rushed to her side.
“Uncle Cloudy is going to tell my future!” Taboo said, still smiling from ear to ear.
“Taboo, what did you ask exactly?” Thunderhead asked, his terror clear from his tone; however, Taboo didn’t seem to pick up on it. She just giggled and continued smiling.
“I asked about the wedding!”
Thunderhead just looked at Rainbow Dash. He wanted to curse, but he couldn’t in the present company. He simply expressed this with his face, which worried Rainbow Dash quite some bit.
“Oh, come on. It can’t be all that bad.” For some reason, Rainbow Dash wasn’t sure she even believed herself.
“Let us begin.” Chance cut the deck and laid down three cards in front of Taboo. The family leaned over the cards, each one unsure what the arrangement meant. “Hmm… yes… I see. Ah, very good.”
“Very good?” Rainbow Dash asked, hopeful. Thunderhead just shook his head though.
“We’re probably doomed,” he said, translating his Uncle’s first assessment of the augury.
“Here in your past we have the Wheel of Fortune, no doubt because many things in your life have been changing,” Chance said. It didn’t strike anypony as much of a prediction, considering how painfully obvious it was. “And here in the present we have the Four of Wands, which isn’t odd seeing as we have a wedding to celebrate today. We have the blessing of the universe to enjoy this day, for we have indeed earned it.”
“Well, two out of three of them sound pretty good,” Rainbow Dash said aside to Thunderhead. “Maybe we’ll make it out okay.”
“Don’t be so sure,” Thunderhead replied. “He hasn’t gotten to the future yet.”
“And here in the future, we have The Tower.”
“The Tower?” Taboo asked, examining the card as closely as she could.
“The Tower?” Thunderhead parroted back at his Uncle.
“The Tower?” Rainbow Dash didn’t know what was going on. “What? What’s The Tower?”
“The Tower is the card of calamity,” Chance said, clarifying just how screwed everypony was. “It means you are about to experience an uncontrollable, outside force intersecting your own plans.”
“Whoa, cool!” Taboo smiled and flitted her wings happily. She didn’t actually know what “calamity” meant.
“Okay! That’s enough fortunetelling for one day!” Thunderhead said, pushing the three cards back to his Uncle, who grunted and began to reshuffle his deck. “Is everypony else on their way? Where are they? Why did they let you leave on your own? Don’t they know you cause nothing but trouble?”
“Hey now, don’t shoot the messenger,” Chance said as he got up from the table. “If you’re so eager to see everypony, then I’ll go get them.”
“Yes, please, that’d be actually helpful.” Thunderhead escorted his Uncle right out the door, locking it securely behind the older stallion. Once he was gone, he let out a loud groan. “I swear… that pony…” He turned around to see Rainbow Dash regarding him with a somewhat pained expression.
“You don’t seem too fond of your uncle.”
“No, it’s not like I hate him,” Thunderhead confessed, but his tone hardly inspired confidence in his fiancée. “He’s difficult sometimes. He’s superstitious, impulsive, awkward, hairy, and just generally weird. You don’t really know him yet, but maybe you’ll get where I’m coming from someday.”
“This isn’t exactly how I pictured my first encounter with your family going,” Rainbow Dash said, sidling up to Thunderhead. “But hey, at least we got the quirky one out of the way.”
“…”
“What? What’s with that look?” Rainbow Dash asked as Thunderhead’s face twisted in knots. “Exactly how many weird family members do you have?”
“Well… let me put it this way. Chance is my mom’s oldest brother. Between my mom’s older sister, my mom’s younger brother, and my dad’s younger sister, I’ve got fifteen cousins. Of those fifteen, twelve are Chance’s kids.”
“What? Twelve?!”
“They’re all vaguely reminiscent of him.” Thunderhead wasn’t sure if he meant that to be a warning or a comfort. At any rate, he had more to explain. “Some of them have kids too, so I don’t have to tell you that it totals up to quite a few ponies in the end.”
“You could’ve mentioned you have a huge family!” Rainbow Dash said, a little put off that she was only learning about all this just now. She trusted Thunderhead to see to it that all his guests would be provided for, but now she wished she had played a more active role in that part of the planning. She had kind of wanted Thunderhead’s family to come on as a surprise, but this was much too surprising.
That’s when Rainbow Dash had a thought. She turned back to where Taboo was animatedly chatting with Tank, who for his own part was at least acting like he was listening. Thunderhead watched her watch Taboo for a moment, wondering what gears were turning in her head. When Rainbow Dash turned back to him, her expression was not so tense as before.
“Chance didn’t seem to mind Taboo at all. He just marched in and marched out without asking or saying anything. I know you write your folks pretty often, but did you write to him too?”
“News gets around in our family,” Thunderhead said. “One of Uncle Chance’s good traits is that he doesn’t hate anypony for any reason. I’m not actually sure he can, especially not a young filly like Taboo.”
“So… he’s okay with her?” Rainbow Dash said, her insecurity showing for a rare moment.
“I’m not the black sheep in my family,” Thunderhead said, wrapping a hoof around her. “I think they would’ve been disappointed if Taboo wasn’t out of the ordinary. You don’t know this yet, but my folks already have a pretty high opinion of you.”
“Oh, so no pressure then?” Rainbow Dash was not comforted at all to hear that his parents thought she was some kind of saint; however, she was relieved to hear that they weren’t going to cause a fuss over Taboo. “It’s times like these that make me happy that I’m the only child of two only children. It makes things much simpler.”
“The simple days are over from here on out,” Thunderhead said. “I’m no fortune teller, but I foresee a change in your family tree.”
Rainbow Dash slammed the doors behind her. Rarity and Fluttershy gawked at her as the rushed pony panted. It was awfully rare to see Rainbow Dash out of breath, but the two mares figured today could easily be that kind of day for her. They waited ever so patiently for her to catch her breath, knowing that she was no doubt going to explain herself.
“Thunderhead’s family is huuuuuuge!” Rainbow Dash finally said. Her friends continued to stare at her, as if imploring her to go on. “We barely managed to get out of the house before a swarm of his cousins descended upon us!”
“Oh please,” Rarity said, rolling her eyes. “It couldn’t have been all that bad.”
“Eleven cousins Rarity! Complete with spouses and multiple children!”
“That’s a lot of ponies,” Fluttershy said from where she sat near the window. She was the only pony sitting as Rarity set about making sure Rainbow Dash’s dress was ready to go. She wouldn’t gotten up, but her expansive belly didn’t really facilitate that. She didn’t do much trotting around these days what with the extra baggage. She stroked her own belly thoughtfully. “Big families aren’t so bad.”
“That’s not even all of them.” Rainbow Dash continued her horror story. “It was getting so hectic out there I just had to make a break for it. I couldn’t keep up with all the introductions and pleasantries and all those ponies!”
“And after today, you’ll be counted among them.” Rarity didn’t seem particularly phased. She carried on with her normal, quiet dignity. Fluttershy for her part didn’t seem too interested either. Rainbow Dash was all alone in her frantic panicking.
“I’m starting to think I should’ve gone to meet them before today,” Rainbow Dash said, but nopony moved to correct her. Her friends might’ve even said she had just made a very good point, but there was no way Rainbow Dash was going to shoulder the blame today of all days. “This would be easier if I could just take them one at a time. This big family thing seems impossible.”
“Speaking of family, where’s Taboo?” Rarity asked, showing some actual concern for the first time since Rainbow Dash had shown up. “You didn’t abandon her when you flew off, did you?”
“… I didn’t abandon her.” Rainbow Dash had clearly omitted some information from that claim, information she sighed and finally conceded. “I left her with Thunderhead, but she’s in good company! His family is super eager to meet her!”
“Well, it can’t really be helped now, can it?” Rarity said with a sigh. “We all knew today wasn’t going to go perfectly, so it’s good you’re getting these little snafus out of the way now.”
“Yeah. If that’s all there is to it, I’d be happy.”
“All there is to what?” Rarity asked.
“Ah, it’s nothing,” Rainbow Dash said as she returned to matters at hand. Before they could get any further, there was a knock at the door. “Uh-oh, I hope it’s not the rest of Thunderhead’s family…”
Since she couldn’t not open up the door, Rainbow Dash reluctantly walked back to the door and turned the knob. When the doors didn’t suddenly swing in under the weight of a thousand or so ponies pressing against it, Rainbow Dash let out the breath she’d been holding in. She opened the doors the rest of the way and revealed two familiar faces.
“Hey there, Dash.”
“Roseluck, Mac! Boy, am I glad it’s just you guys,” Rainbow Dash said, never happier to see the two farm ponies; however, it was more like three farm ponies with how far along Roseluck had come along in her pregnancy. Only Fluttershy rivaled her in terms of burden size. Even so, Roseluck was managing to be up and about as much as she could handle, so coming out today was absolutely no problem.
“Were you expecting somepony else?” Roseluck asked. She couldn’t help but smile a bit at how clearly anxious Rainbow Dash was being right now. “Anyway, we just wanted to give you our congratulations before things really get underway. Try to keep from losing your cool until you’re at least walking up the aisle.”
“I’ve got my work cut out for me,” Rainbow Dash said. “I can’t believe I’m marrying into a family with more cousins than you can count! Do you know what’s that’s like?”
Roseluck just looked up at Big Macintosh, who casually looked the other way.
“Oh, right.” Rainbow Dash’s revelation calmed her down a bit, seeing that Roseluck had survived her own ordeal. “The Apples have a pretty expansive family tree, don’t they?”
“And don’t I know it,” Roseluck said, rolling her eyes but smiling all the while. She patted her belly and grinned at Rainbow Dash. “But big families love new additions. I’m sure they’re more than happy to be bringing you and Taboo into the fold.”
“I’m happy they’re happy, but I wish they’d take it down a notch.” Rainbow Dash certainly couldn’t deny Thunderhead’s family’s eagerness to see her join them since they’d all been so demonstrative of it. Rainbow Dash loved attention, but these ponies were just a little too attentive. She wanted to meet all of them if she could, but the fact that they had attacked her basically all at once had thrown one rather complicated wrench into things. “I still haven’t had a chance to meet Thunderhead’s parents.”
“Whoa, really? Isn’t that kind of something you should do?” Roseluck asked, wondering if she could overstate the importance. “His mom and dad aren’t just his family, but they’re his family ”
“What Roseluck is trying to say is that it isn’t just protocol to meet your fiancée’s parents, but just common sense,” Rarity said in an attempt to clarify and emphasize. “Maybe you should go track them down and say hello before we stick you in your dress.”
“That’s risky business.” Rainbow Dash had to admit both Rarity and Roseluck had a point. She did feel somewhat uncomfortable going through with this without talking to Thunderhead’s parents at least once. She thought that maybe it was time to suck it up and just go through with it. “Alright, I’m going to go ba-”
“Whoop! Nope, scratch that! We’ve got no time!” Rarity said as she suddenly yanked Rainbow Dash onto the dressing platform. “We’re behind as it is! You’ll just have to wait until after the proceedings to talk to them.”
“But you said-”
“Well I have changed my mind!” Rarity began the process of getting Rainbow Dash into her dress.
“We’ll go see if we can find them for you,” Roseluck said, nudging Big Macintosh to go look for the parents of the groom. “We’ll send them your way so you can at least talk to them for a moment before things get underway. Would that be already, Rarity?”
“As long as they don’t get in the way they can talk all they want,” Rarity said as she continued to busy herself with Rainbow Dash who wasn’t being the most cooperative client at the moment. Rarity couldn’t believe she was still fighting her on today of all days. “Hold still!”
“I am!” Rainbow Dash was actually struggling not to struggle. Her instincts were too deeply engraved. It appeared a fierce battle was about to take place in the bride’s chamber.
“Where did she run off to?” Thunderhead asked, but this time not about his fiancée. Taboo had just been standing next to him, but now she appeared to have completely disappeared. Considering how well that filly played hide and seek, he doubted his ability to find her in the steadily growing crowd. He didn’t have much time to linger around, so he scanned the wedding hall up and down and sideways for Taboo. His search didn’t turn up anything, at least it didn’t turn up Taboo.
“Yo, Thundy! How’s it going?”
“Soarin’, not now!” Thunderhead shouldered past the excited stallion and continued his search, but Soarin’ was not to be so easily refused. “I need to find Taboo.”
“Taboo? Oh, I thought I saw her over in the lobby.”
“Huh, what?” Thunderhead spun around towards the lobby. It was incredibly congested with guests, meaning even if Taboo was in there he wouldn’t be able to see her. “What’s she doing in there?”
“Maybe she’s lobbying for something?” Soarin’ was disappointed to find his joke fell on disappointing ears. “Uh, how about I track Taboo down for you? You must have to get moving, don’t you?”
“Soarin’ I wouldn’t task you with finding the bathroom.”
“No, it’s cool! Let me handle it!” Soarin’ said as he darted off, leaving Thunderhead to wonder if he should actually leave it to the irresponsible stunt flier. He didn’t have to think very long about it, and quickly looked around for somepony more trustworthy. Looking around the room, he didn’t have a whole lot of options. He could see that filly who treated Rainbow Dash like a big sister with the weird name, but he still didn’t fully trust her after the last time she foalsat. He could also see that pegasus who might be Rainbow Dash’s friend or something who went out with the morning guard for a very brief space of time, but he didn’t want to talk to her and run the risk of getting hit on. He spotted a third viable option, and even though he really didn’t want to go with it he couldn’t see anypony else he wanted to ask for help.
“Hey, Pinkie Pie.” The moment he spoke, the party pony spun around and instantly blew a party horn into his face. It was basically what he expected to happen. “Can I ask you a favor?”
“You want me to go find Taboo?”
“I want you to go fi-huh?!”
“Suuure thing!” Pinkie Pie bounced off at once to find her quarry, and oddly enough she bounced off towards the lobby of all places.
“… Oh… I hope I’ve done the right thing.”
“Well, I can certainly understand that sentiment.”
Every hair on Thunderhead’s neck stood on end. He whipped around all the way and threw a salute.
“Sir!”
“I’m still retired, son. At ease,” the grey stallion behind Thunderhead said as he rolled his eyes. “Shouldn’t you be getting ready?”
“I was about to go do that!” Thunderhead had not eased up at all. “I just had to take care of something first.”
“You should be taking care of getting married,” the stallion said, his tone hardly conducive to easing Thunderhead’s worries. “Your mother and I are still hoping to meet our future daughter-in-law before the proceedings. Is there still any chance of that?”
“Oh, Hardy. Don’t be so tough on the boy. It’s not like we came out to visit ourselves before today.” Thunderhead’s mother nudged his father, smiling the whole while. Her husband grimaced a little, but said nothing. She turned her attention to her son. “We’re excited to meet her, really. We’re also excited to meet our grandchild. I keep telling your father we should have visited sooner.”
“No, it’s fine. I know you’re busy,” Thunderhead said to his mother. “I’m just happy you could make it today.”
“Bark bark!”
Thunderhead started when he noticed there was a third presence among his parents. He looked down at the floor and noticed there was a little dog posted at his father’s side.
“Y-you got a dog?”
“Don’t be so surprised, boy! You’re the one who got a wife and kid all of a sudden,” his father said without missing a beat. “And yes, we got a dog.”
“His name is Pretzel!” His mother exclaimed, but Thunderhead was still examining the dog in question. It had stubby little legs, big pointy ears, but no tail to speak of. “Your father thought it would be nice to have something to look after now that our little colt is all grown up.”
“You got this dog, dad?” Thunderhead asked, getting a nod from his father. “I never took you for the toy breed type.”
“Welsh Corgis are not toy dogs!” his father yelled. He cleared his throat and calmed down a bit. “They’re herding dogs.”
Thunderhead decided it was best not to pursue the subject any further. “Anyway, I’m glad I ran into you two before the ceremony. I was hoping to ask you about-”
“Don’t worry, we brought it,” his mother said as she suddenly cut in. “Your father has it in his bag. Hardy, won’t you give it to him?”
“Hmph.” Thunderhead’s father turned up his nose. “I wanted to wait until we met the mare our son is marrying before forking this over. I don’t see why I should change my mind now.”
“Oh, don’t be like that Hardy,” mother said, cuddling up to her husband. “If you give it to him now, you can show him that cool trick you taught Pretzel.” Thunderhead’s father lit up all of a sudden.
“Well, I suppose now is an opportune time.” The stallion turned to his little dog, who looked up at him with glassy eyes and lolling tongue. “Pretzel, get the box!”
On command, the short little dog hopped up on its hind legs and stuck its snout in his master’s bag. After a few moments of ruffling around, the dog jumped down with a little box in its jaws. Thunderhead had to admit he was kind of impressed his father had trained Pretzel to do something like that, but then again it made a lot of sense that his father would try and do something like that.
“Alright Pretzel, you can give it to my son now.” Thunderhead’s father gave the command, but Pretzel didn’t spring into action this time. He looked up at his master and tilted his head a little to the side. “Pretzel, give it!” Another command got another sideways look. The little doggy cogs in Pretzels head spun round and round until he finally reached some kind of conclusion.
“H-hey!” Thunderhead was powerless to watch as Pretzel bolted off without a single bit of warning. Although he was impressed that a dog with such short legs could move so fast, he was also mortified that it was moving that fast with his prize secure in its jaws. “Come back, Pretzel!”
“No, hold on! I’ll get him!” Thunderhead’s father said before trotting after his dog. “If his master doesn’t do it, he’ll never learn!” Before anypony could contest, a grown stallion was off chasing a tiny dog while calling “Pretzel” over and over.
“Oh dear. I’d better help your father with this,” Thunderhead’s mother said as she started to go. “We’ll catch him before things start, so don’t worry about a thing! You just go get ready!”
As much as Thunderhead wanted to not worry about a thing, things were getting noticeably worrisome. He decided to just leave things in the somewhat capable hooves of his father, his mother, Pinkie Pie, Soarin’. He thought that between the four of them they could surely get everything in order.
“Oh, this isn’t gonna end well, isn’t it?”
Taboo searched around nervously. If she had come into contact with the phrase “young and careless” that’s what she’d be calling herself. All she could do now is hope she could find right her wrong before the ceremony got underway, assuming the ceremony could get underway now. She worried about it as she crawled under another table to continue her search, but she didn’t find what she was looking for under here either. She was much better at hiding than seeking. Maybe if she knew what she was looking for looked like it would really help her out.
She emerged out from under the table. Taboo was running out of places to look. She wondered if it was somewhere up high, which would necessarily help her. She gave her wings a few defeated flaps, knowing full well she wasn’t going to get airborne anytime soon. Her search was restricted to the ground, but she couldn’t let that discourage her. Squinting her eyes, she tried to find somewhere she hadn’t looked yet.
“Ah, there!” Taboo darted off towards the ladies’ washroom. It was entirely possible it got lost in there. She scampered across the hall’s floor and into the washroom by weaving between some mare’s legs on the way in. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary upon her arrival. The floor was kind of dirty though, she Taboo hoped it hadn’t been lost in the restroom. It struck her that it might’ve been lost in the stallion’s washroom, but she wasn’t allowed in there. Defeated, Taboo hung her head and turned to leave.
*bonk*
“Ah, whoops! Sorry” Taboo apologized automatically for bumping into what was clearly somepony else’s hoof. She looked way up at the pony she had bumped into, but she didn’t recognize the mare. In fact, she had never seen a mare quite like this one. At first glance she just seemed like another pegasus, but there was something specific about this mare that Taboo couldn’t help but notice. “You’re pretty.”
“Well, thank you,” the mare said, smiling down at her. “Such a polite young filly. You must be Taboo.”
“You know my name?” Taboo was absolutely sure she’d never ever met this pony before. She was certain she would’ve remembered meeting her. She couldn’t think of any reason that this strange mare would know let alone recognize her.
“Yes, we’re going to be… well, cousins after today,” the mare said, struggling to explain the technicalities. She got down on Taboo’s level and tried her best. “I’m Thunderhead’s cousin, so that would make you my first cousin once removed.”
“First cousin once removed?” Taboo cocked her head to the side. “I’ve never had a cousin before. You’re my first one?”
“Oh, well-”
“And why did they removed you?” Taboo asked, cocking her head to the other side. “Did you do something bad?”
“It’s not quite like that,” the mare said, chuckling to herself. The terminology barely made sense to her. “Let’s just stick to cousins, okay?”
“Okay.” Taboo was still far off from satiated in her curiosity. “I won’t tell anypony you were removed.”
“Oh, how sweet of you. Thanks,” the mare said, genuinely thankful until she realized what exactly the filly was saying. She shook it off and continued on. “Let me introduce myself. My name is Kitywalk. My friends just call me Kitty!”
“What do your cousins call you?”
“Oh, my cousins are my friends too, silly!” Kitty was impressed at how simultaneously sharp and simple this filly was. It kind of reminded her of a younger version of a certain cousin of hers. “I have a good feeling we’re going to get along just fine.”
“Uh, Kitty, why are you talking to a filly on the bathroom floor?”
Kitty and Taboo looked over at a third pony who had entered the washroom. Taboo stared up at this second mare while Kitty looked down and realized she was down on her haunches on the dirty bathroom floor.
“Is she my cousin too?” Taboo asked, noting a vague similarity between the two mares.
“Ah, yes! This is my little sister, Gale!” Kitty said as she stood back up.
“Dr. Nightingale,” Gale said, snapping back at her sister. She then turned to Taboo. “Only my friends call me Gale.”
“But I’m your siiister!” Kitty began to whine, but Gale didn’t bat an eyelash.
“I fail to see your point.” Gale didn’t even spare her sister a look back. She stayed focused on Taboo. “You, Taboo, may call me Gale if it pleases you.”
“Oh, okay.” Taboo had no idea she was so famous. Had she known so many interesting ponies knew about her, she would make it a point to spend more time with them. Of course, she would have to ask permission from her mother.
“C’mon Gale, don’t be meeeean.”
“Please excuse my sister,” Gale said, still not looking at her sister. “She might’ve gotten all the looks, but she got none of the brains. Airheaded models like her are prone to triviality.”
“What’s a model?” Taboo had to ask, seeing as she didn’t understand anything Gale had just said.
“They get paid to be pretty.” Gale summed it up very curtly, but Kitty was quick to enter her rebuttal.
“It’s more than being pretty!” she said. “I mean, I have to wear lots and lots of nice clothing and show it off in front of ponies. I also have to get my picture taken by professional photographers all the time! I have to meet all these celebrities and don’t get me started on all the ads ponies want me to be in. Not to mention that it takes a lot of work to maintain this figure!”
“Oh, yes. Why don’t you try and lecture a doctor about the difficulties of maintaining your weight? I’m sure they will believe every last heartbreaking piece of it.”
“You’re always so mean! You should respect your older sister,” Kitty said, stamping her hoof in protest. She looked to Taboo for support. “You think being a model sounds fun, don’t you Taboo?”
“It does sound like fun!” Taboo still wasn’t exactly clear on what a model was, but being pretty sounded easy enough to her.
“As fascinating as all of this is, holding it in is bad for my kidneys,” Gale said.
“Oh, right, I came in here to pee!” Kitty said, having forgotten all about it after running into Taboo. “The ceremony should be starting soon! We’d better hurry.”
“The ceremony is starting soon?!” Taboo asked, suddenly reminded of her previous task. “Sorry, but I have to keep looking!”
Before either Gale or Kitty could ask what she was looking for, Taboo was out of the restroom. Now was not the moment to get distracted. She only had a little time before the ceremony started without an essential part of the proceedings. Taboo looked around frantically, hoping for a break in the case.
“Bark bark!”
Taboo looked over to her left. Across the hall, there was a dog with pointy ears staring right at her. It just stood there, panting. Taboo cocked her head to the side. The dog responded in kind. Taboo had to admit that it was a very cute dog, but then something else caught her attention. The dog leaned down and picked up a little box with its jaws.
“Ah, there it is!” Taboo wasn’t actually entirely sure, but it made sense that if her mommy had lost it that a dog might have taken it. For all she knew it was very easy for dogs to take it, but she knew very little on the subject anyway. Before she could collect her thoughts, the little dog bolted away. “No! Come back!”
Just like that, the chase was on.
Thunderhead paced around nervously in the lobby. According to the ushers, everypony was seated in the hall. The ceremony was mere minutes away from starting, but according to his sources there were still a number of things amiss. First and foremost, he still wasn’t quite sure where Taboo had gotten off to. He had heard from different ponies that she was here and there, but so far Thunderhead hadn’t heard back from either Pinkie Pie or Soarin’ on the matter. As far as anypony could remember, neither pony had even been seen recently; however, Thunderhead was more worried about the fact that the Welsh Corgi called Pretzel and his new chew toy were still at large. To top it all off, he just got some very concerning news from his best man.
“I mean, he said I shouldn’t worry too much, right? Once you hit rock bottom, there’s only one way to go, right? Up? Things will get better, right?” Sprout said, pacing even more nervously than Thunderhead.
“Sprout, I need you to answer the question,” Thunderhead said, trying to get the stallion’s attention back. “How long has my uncle been telling ponies’ fortunes?”
“I’ve got bigger things to worry about, man!” Sprout said, scratching his head. “Besides, it’s not like I was keeping track. All I know is that ponies were lined up by the time I heard about it.”
“Drat! I’ve got enough to worry about right now!” Thunderhead gritted his teeth and tried to think. He had noticed that everypony seemed on edge all of a sudden. It was as if a strange, unexplainable miasma had fallen over the hall which could only be explained by Uncle Chance. There was no way many of the guests present could’ve known what they were in for when they sat down for a session with him. “I’m going out on a limb and guessing that everypony asked about love and relationships.”
“I know I did,” Sprout replied. “It just seemed appropriate.”
“It’s never appropriate to get your fortune told by him.” As much as Thunderhead wanted to tell himself that his Uncle’s fortunes were a bunch of bunk and the fortune from this morning wasn’t going to come true, he could hardly do that as it seemed to be coming true right before his eyes. Taboo was missing, a Corgi was running loose somewhere, and now most of the wedding guests are questioning their own love lives. Thunderhead figured that the best thing he could do is try and not imagine how things could get any worse.
“Uh, Thunderhead? We’ve got a problem.”
“Yeah, I already know,” Thunderhead said, turning around to see who was stating the obvious. To his absolute horror, he found himself looking at Applejack supporting two familiar faces who appeared to be having trouble standing up straight.
“Oh, hey there Thunderhead!” Birdie said, waving at where Thunderhead approximately was. The older stallion had a drunken smile spread from ear to ear as he slurred over his words. “I did it. I’m finally ready!”
“Oh please, Celestia, no.”
“Ah am real sorry ‘bout this Thunderhead,” Applejack said, straining under the weight of Birdie along with Palette on her opposite side. Palette, for her part, also appeared completely plastered. “It seems Mr. Dash here was a bit nervous ‘bout givin’ his only daughter away. Ah thought a little cider would loosen him up, buuuuut…”
“A little turned into a lot?” Thunderhead could put all the pieces together already. “And I guess his wife just couldn’t let him wallow alone?”
“Oh, I am not drunk!” Palette protested against a nonexistent accusation, not realizing she had just said exactly what drunk ponies usually say. “I haven’t gotten drunk in years! Why… I can’t even remember the last time I got drunk. Can’t remember much of anything really! Did the wedding start yet?”
“Huh? No, it can’t start without me!” Birdie said, getting onto his own hooves somehow. “I gertta job to do!” His slurring was only getting worse, which did not inspire confidence in Thunderhead.
“I’ll get Mrs. Dash to her seat, can you take care of Mr. Dash until you go in?” Applejack asked, not that she was giving Thunderhead many other options. All he could do was nod his consent and give Birdie a shoulder to lean on.
“Well, when it rains it pours,” Thunderhead said to himself. Birdie mumbled something in response, but Thunderhead ignored him. There were too many other things to think about currently. He realized that as per tradition he hadn’t seen Rainbow Dash since she went to get ready, but that also meant she might have no idea what’s going on either. He figured he couldn’t let her fly blind into this storm. “Sprout, keep an eye on this for me!” Thunderhead passed Birdie onto Sprout and flew out of there before his friend could argue with him. He winged his way to where Rainbow Dash was getting ready and pounded on the door.
“Twilight? Is it time to go now?” Rarity asked from behind the door.
“It’s me.”
“Thunderhead? You’re not allowed in here! It’s bad luck to see the bride before the ceremony!”
“Considering the luck we’ve been having, bad luck would be a chance for the better.”
“What?”
“Look, can I just talk to Rainbow Dash for a second?” Thunderhead asked, but he didn’t get an immediate response. He waited for what felt like a full two minutes before Rarity finally answered him.
“If something is wrong, I’ll take care of it. No need to bother Rainbow Dash with it.”
“I’m not sure there is anything you can do about it,” Thunderhead said. He still wanted to talk to Rainbow Dash, but he figured Rarity still needed be convinced that this was an emergency. “Taboo is running loose somewhere in the hall along with a Corgi. The guests are in a bad mood because of bad fortunes and Rainbow Dash’s dad is really drunk.”
“Wait, what? Hold on,” Rarity said, clearly confused by everything he had just said. “Taboo is where? And what’s a Corgi? What is this about bad fortunes?”
Before Thunderhead could explain further, he was interrupted by the worst possible news at that moment. “It’s time to get started,” Twilight said, coming up behind Thunderhead.
“B-but! We’re still not ready!” Thunderhead said, but Twilight wasn’t really listening to him. She was following the schedule, and nothing could keep Twilight from following a schedule.
“Thunderhead, it’ll be fine,” Rarity said from behind the door. “I’m sure this Corgi business will resolve itself. It’s just your nerves talking.”
“I don’t think you ladies fully understand.”
“Time to get over your cold hooves, Thunderhead.” Twilight still wasn’t listening. Rarity opened up the door for the princess and she slid inside, but not without issuing one last order. “Get on out there. You’ll be married before you know it.” With that, the door shut behind her. Thunderhead swallowed his fear and headed back towards the lobby. Part of him kept telling himself that everything could still go as planned, but the other part had resigned to just watch the whole thing to up in flames.
“Why do you smell like cider?”
“Because I’ve been drinking it,” Birdie whispered back to his daughter as he led her up the aisle. When they arrived at the foot of the alter, they both stopped. Actually, Rainbow Dash stopped and then managed to keep her father from drunkenly walking any further.
“Who gives this mare to be wed to this stallion?”
“Oh, uh, I do!” Birdie managed to say with minimal stuttering and slurring. He stood there awkwardly for a moment while Rainbow Dash continued to join Thunderhead at the altar before Big Macintosh sprang up and guided him back to his seat.
“Dearly beloved,” the minister began the ceremony, but the main participants weren’t really paying attention.
“Is my dad drunk?” Rainbow Dash whispered to Thunderhead.
“Huh, what?”
“Oh, Celestia, you’re not drunk too, are you?”
“Oh, no no no no! It’s just… you look… wow,” Thunderhead managed to whisper, recovering from his brief bout of shock. It was a bit much to see the mare he loved, who dressed up about as often as it rains upwards, appear before him as a vision in white. Rarity had even talked her into a modest amount of makeup and pulled her mane back into an elegant braid. Thunderhead couldn’t avoid staring into her eyes, which was making his heart pound right up against his ribcage.
“Like what you see?”
“I’m really glad I’m the one marrying you.” Thunderhead wasn’t completely sure what he was saying anymore. He just wanted to stare at the beautiful mare who was about to become his wife. He let that perfect moment just hang as long as he could. “Yeah, but your dad is completely wasted.”
“And what was that about a Corgi and Taboo?” Rainbow Dash asked. “I couldn’t hear what you were saying, but Rarity sounded confused about something.”
“Both Taboo and Pretzel are MIA.”
“Pretzel? Huh?” Rainbow Dash wanted to inquire further, but she realized there was something more wrong at the moment. “Where’s Taboo?”
“She’s been running around the hall all day it seems,” Thunderhead explained. “I sent Soarin’ and Pinkie after her, but neither of them returned.”
“They didn’t find her?”
“Well, yeah, that’s the thing. When I say ‘neither of them returned,’ I mean that they’re missing too. Some of my cousins said that they saw her in the bathroom, though.”
“Oh, typical Taboo,” Rainbow Dash said, rolling her eyes. “Holding everypony up in the bathroom. So much for the perfect wedding.”
“At least we tried?” Thunderhead tried to find the silver lining, but realized he completely missed the mark. “Hey, we’re still getting married.”
“I know, right?” Rainbow Dash said as if she’d only just remembered. “I actually thought this day would never come, for different reasons at different times.”
“I’m glad it’s here,” Thunderhead said, reaching over and taking Rainbow Dash’s hoof. “We can all finally be a proper family.”
“I think we’ve been a proper family for a while now,” Rainbow Dash said, smiling back at her fiancée. It wouldn’t be much longer before she would be calling him husband. It felt strange, but she wasn’t scared. Despite all the weird things going on, and despite all the bumps along the way, she felt certain about this. There was nothing left in the way.
“If anypony has any reason these two ponies should not be joined together, let them speak now or forever hold their peace.”
The doors to the lobby suddenly flew open, causing everypony in the hall to turn around. They were all surprised to find that there was nopony standing in the open doorway. Puzzled, they all turned back to the ceremony.
“Hold on!”
Everypony turned back to the doors to see Taboo come scampering in. She dashed all the way up the aisle and climbed the stairs to the altar. Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead had no idea what to make of this development.
“Do you have a reason these two ponies should not be wed?”
“I do!” Taboo shouted. Every last pony in the hall gasped. Some ponies even gasped twice, such was this turn of events. “Mommy lost something she can’t get married without!”
“I did?”
“She did?”
“She did!” Taboo looked absolutely sure, but once again Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead had no idea what to say. “I heard ponies talking about it this morning! They said because mommy had me she lost something and can’t get married in white.”
“Uh… oh.” Rainbow Dash felt everything slide into slow motion. She vaguely recalled overhearing a conversation of that nature this morning. She wanted to stop Taboo from saying what it appeared she was about to say, but it was already far too late.
“Mommy lost her virginity!” Taboo’s words echoed in the silent hall. Nopony dared move. Nopony even breathed. “We can’t go on until we find it! We have to-mphmpgh!”
“OoooooOOOOoookay! That’s enough out of you!” Rainbow Dash said, stifling her daughter. Taboo struggled to get out her argument, but she couldn’t free herself from the vice grip. “Can we get on with this?”
“Hey! I thought you still had that!” Birdie said, standing up with a start. He wobbled around a bit from standing up so fast, but managed to stay steady enough to raise a ruckus. “I thought I raised you better than that!”
“Dad!?”
“Whoooooo!” Palette cheered, clearly playing for the opposite team. “You go girl!” Neither of Rainbow Dash’s parents were acting their age. Unfortunately, this caught the attention of a party separate from Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead.
“Would you two please sit down!” Hardy said, standing up himself. “We’re in the middle of a ceremony, if you don’t mind.”
“Who the heck are you?” Birdie wasn’t in the mood to be trifled with, even though he wasn’t exactly sure he was being trifled with; however, that wasn’t a risk he was about to take. “You can’t tell me what to do!”
“Sit down, sir!” Hardy shouted, not yielding from his point.
“Honey, just let it go,” his wife said, trying to calm him down.
“Dear, please, let me handle this.” Hardy, against basically everypony’s better judgement, marched right across the aisle to where Birdie was. “Sit down before I seat you, sir!” Even though there was still plenty of room for threats to go back and forth, the mixture of alcohol and male pride running through Birdie’s veins caused him to skip right to the part where he winds up and punches Hardy straight in the jaw.
That was basically the moment the whole hall erupted into a brawl of sorts, with Hardy and Birdie comprising the center of the battle like two gladiators in an arena. Up on the altar, ponies could only watch. Thunderhead was mortified, Taboo was somewhat thrilled by the whole thing, and Rainbow Dash was for some reason more interested in the appearance of Pretzel over on the side. She turned towards the dog and reached out a hoof towards it.
Pretzel, like the loyal dog he was, come plodding over on his stumpy little legs. While Thunderhead and Taboo kept watching the riot, Rainbow Dash managed to coerce the box from Pretzel’s jaws with a few scratches behind the ear. She opened the box up while Pretzel leap on top of Taboo and began licking her mercilessly.
“What are these?” Rainbow Dash asked herself as she removed the two pieces of paper lodged inside the little box. Thunderhead noticed that Taboo was currently giggling and wrestling with Pretzel, and then he noticed that Rainbow Dash had preemptively opened the box. She turned to him, her look obviously searching for an explanation.
“Ah, those.” Thunderhead was actually more concerned about the free for all occurring two yards away, but he figured there was no way to stop it at anyway. “Okay, I know you said you were against a Honeymoon, but I kind of pulled some strings.”
“You mean, these are-”
“Tickets to a resort in Coltacabana. It’s only a week, but-”
“Only a week?” Rainbow Dash’s tone somewhat confused Thunderhead. She didn’t sound upset as he suspected she might’ve been, but rather she sounded a bit overwhelmed. “After all of this, it’s going to take more than a week on the beach to restore my sanity. Current events withstanding, I think I’ve changed my mind about a Honeymoon. We need to get out of here.”
“… Sounds good to me.” Thunderhead and Rainbow Dash linked forelegs and turned back to the minister, who seemed somewhat unimpressed by all the chaos. “Let’s just… keep going.”
“… I suppose I’ll just wrap this up then. Let’s just go with the short version,” she said. She waited for Taboo to take up the Mare of Honor position next to her mother and for Pretzel to fill the Best Stallion position next to Thunderhead, but once that was done she cleared her throat and continued. “Do you, Thunderhead, take Rainbow Dash to be your lawfully wedded wife despite the fact that doing so has caused a riot to break out between your friends and family.”
“Even if you put it like that, the answer is ‘I do.’”
“And do you, Rainbow Dash, take Thunderhead to be your lawfully wedded husband even though your daughter irreversibly embarrassed you on this incredibly important day in front of pretty much every pony you’ve ever known and now your official witness will probably have to be this small dog?”
“Bark bark!”
“You’ll get no answer from me but ‘I do.’”
“Then I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride.”
Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead went ahead and kissed each other, but the current situation didn’t merit lingering on it. Now officially husband and wife, they turned and looked out at the crowd of fighting ponies.
“… I know I shouldn’t say it… but I think I’m going to say it,” Rainbow Dash said. Thunderhead just shrugged, knowing full well what she was talking about. Rainbow Dash turned to the crowd and spoke as sarcastically as she could. “How could this get any worse?”
A blood curdling scream ripped through the entire hall. Everypony stopped what they were doing to follow it to its source in an isolated corner where Time Turner had been fending off ponies with a chair; however, Turner had dropped his chair too as he was nearly deafened from having the actual source scream almost directly in his ear.
“Oh, I’m sorry everypony,” Fluttershy said, instantly apologetic for some reason. “I didn’t mean to disturb you all, but I think I’m having a foal.”
“H-huh? R-r-r-r-really?” Time Turner asked, instantly at his wife’s side; meanwhile, Rainbow Dash, Thunderhead, and Taboo marveled at the sudden turn of events.
“Okay… now I have to wonder how it could get any worse,” Thunderhead said, but his query was answered in yet another load groan from the other pregnant mare in the room.
“Oh-ho boy! Hold on, I think I’m having a foal too!” Roseluck shouted.
“Bark bark!”
“You said it, Pretzel.” Thunderhead patted the dog on the head while Rainbow Dash kept Taboo from shouting out the phrase that seemed to be perpetuating all the trouble. As the two mares going into labor were quickly shuttled out of the hall by their respective husbands, the rest of the crowd began picking up the mess they’d made. “We should probably get on over to the reception hall.”
“No argument there. C’mon Taboo, let’s try and salvage this whole thing.”
“Sale-vage?” Taboo didn’t know what that meant, but she could sense what her mother was trying to say. “This has been the best wedding ever!” The statement shocked Thunderhead and Rainbow Dash, who wondered if Taboo had finally figured out sarcasm. The filly seemed earnest though, smiling from ear to ear as they wandered into the lobby.
“That much fun, eh?” Rainbow Dash asked.
“It was the most exciting boring part ever!” Taboo said, clarifying what had made this whole experience so wonderful. “How could it get any worse!”
Before Rainbow Dash could scold her for jinxing things, the coat closet next to the entrance suddenly burst open as a beast with two backs covered in coats tumbled out. The two ponies managed to spring out of their embrace and stand up.
“Pinkie? Soarin’?”
“Hey Dash! Hey Thundy!” Soarin’ was acting somewhat bashful, and the reason why was pretty clear to Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead. Taboo, on the other hoof, was completely confused. Soarin’ put a hoof around Pinkie Pie, whose limp mane and flushed expression seemed completely out of character. She was still smiling, but it was a bashful smile that looked like it might’ve been borrowed from Fluttershy. “Uh, this is my new marefriend, Pinkie Pie! We kind of hit it off back in Cloudsdale, and then we hit it off again even more back here… aaaand yeah.”
“… Congratulations?” Rainbow Dash was officially done that day.
The front lawn of Ponyville General Hospital had never been the venue of a wedding reception before, but Rainbow Dash supposed that there was a first time for everything. With the number of ponies who needed a bit of medical attention after the ceremony, it was prudent for them to move the reception somewhere the injured could easily limp back to the group. On top of that, many of the wedding goers wanted to be nearby for the two births that were currently still underway. As much as Rainbow Dash wanted to jump on the train and get out of Ponyville for a good long while, she was remiss to leave before at least receiving word about her friends’ foals.
All in all, the reception was actually going much better than Rainbow Dash expected. She thought for sure things would go downhill when the wedding band refused to come play on the venue, but things then took a sudden turn for the better. Apparently a local funk band had been admitted into the burn ward after an incident involving botched pyrotechnics a little while back, and when they heard there was a band-less reception outside jumped at the chance to perform. The arrangements were made blindly fast, and the result was the bandaged band finally getting to stretch their musical legs.
The brawl had also served to alleviate a lot of tensions between guests. The animosity that had risen to the surface due to a strange fusion of fortune-telling and punch-drunkeness turned into a strong comradery between ponies. Everypony was eager to just let bygones be bygones and get to know the stranger who had knocked the wind out of them. There was a liberal smattering of black eyes, but spirits were high anyway. In fact, Rainbow Dash was wishing the spirits were just a little lower.
“Ohmygawd, Rainbow Dash!” Cloudchaser suddenly assaulted Rainbow Dash’s eardrums with her greeting. “Congrats on your wedding!”
“I don’t actually remember inviting you,” Rainbow Dash said, trying to get Thunderhead to dance away from her. Unfortunately, Cloudchaser had brought an ally.
“Yeah, congrats to you both!” Sprout somehow managed to say with Cloudchaser practically dancing in every ounce of his personal space. He didn’t seem to mind.
“Thanks man. I’m sorry my cousin broke a chair over your head.” Thunderhead had been giving out a lot of apologies. Apparently, some of his cousins were pretty accomplished wrestlers. They hadn’t escaped without some scratches, but the damage down was much more than the damage received.
“Oh, it’s okay. I feel much better now,” Sprout said, as if nopony could see the bandage wrapped around his head. “Besides, I wouldn’t have gotten to meet Cloudchaser if it wasn’t for that melee.”
“Yeah… sorry.”
“Hm? What was that?”
“Uh, yeah, that’s cool.” Thunderhead suddenly understood what “rock bottom” meant for Sprout.
“C’mon Sprout, let’s go dance over there!” Cloudchaser said, pulling her date away from the crowd to where nopony was dancing. Thunderhead and Rainbow Dash tried not to think about what they were going to do once they got there.
“Maybe we should’ve had a tiny ceremony. Think of all the money we could’ve saved,” Rainbow Dash said, but Thunderhead could tell she wasn’t anywhere near serious. She had enjoyed this whole thing, even if she had to enjoy certain parts in retrospect. She glanced over to where Taboo was spending time with some of the younger kids of Thunderhead’s cousins. She looked so happy, playing like any other filly. Rainbow Dash leaned her head into Thunderhead’s chest and continued watching. She thought she could perhaps tolerate Ponyville for a little while longer. Besides, she didn’t want to break the news to Taboo that she would be leaving her with her parents for a whole week starting tonight. That news could wait a little longer.
“Uh… ah-hem.”
Thunderhead suddenly snapped to attention, nearly causing Rainbow Dash to drop to the floor. When she got her bearings back, she turned to see the group of ponies who had just walked over.
“Hello sir!”
“At ease, son,” Hardy said. He still looked like a complete mess, but at least he looked like a bandaged up mess. He might’ve looked a little better if he didn’t look quite so nervous. “I… uhm… I guess I just wanted to say… well… congrats.”
“Hey! We decided on apologizing first!” Birdie said, who also looked like a total mess. Rainbow Dash had to suppress a snicker when she noticed part of his moustache appeared to be missing. He seemed to be sober now, so he was probably red due to embarrassment. “That got way out of hoof because of me. I can’t apologize enough for attacking the father of the groom at my own daughter’s wedding! How do I come back from that?”
“You don’t, Bird Brain.” Palette did not look happy. To emphasis this, she punched Birdie in the shoulder, hard. “I can’t believe you got us drunk!”
“H-hey! You got yourself dru-OW!” Birdie didn’t seem to know when to keep his mouth shut.
“Dad, it’s fine.” Rainbow Dash had to try astoundingly hard not to burst into laughter. “I forgive you, provided I can hold this over your head forever and ever.”
“That sounds fair to me.”
“I’m sorry too. This is still partially my fault,” Hardy said, finally able to apologize. “Had I known he was the father of the bride, I wouldn’t have acted like that.”
“How did you not know he was the father of the bride?” Thunderhead asked, posing a question that was on everypony’s mind. “He walked Rainbow Dash up the aisle.”
“He declared he was giving me away,” Rainbow Dash said.
“And then he declared that he ‘raised her better,’” Palette said, adding to the pile.
“Oh, Hardy had other things on his mind,” his wife said, indicating to the thing that had been preoccupying him.
“Bark bark!”
“You should be apologizing too,” Hardy muttered to his dog, but Pretzel wasn’t about to show one bit of remorse. “Well, I guess we should probably introduce ourselves to our daughter-in-law.”
“If you ask me we’re long overdue for that,” his wife said as she turned to Rainbow Dash. “It’s nice to finally get to meet you, Rainbow Dash. I’m Stormy Chance, and this is my foolish husband Hard Knocks.”
“Yeah, it’s nice to finally meet you both officially.” Rainbow Dash wasn’t exactly sure what somepony should say in this kind of situation. “I like your son… he’s pretty cool.” She was only now certain that what she just said is not what she should’ve said. Thankfully, Hardy and Stormy just laughed it off.
“Well, welcome to the family,” Hardy said. “Now, we hate to run off so quickly, but quite frankly I need something for my aching head.”
“I hear that,” Birdie replied. “C’mon, let me buy you an apology drink.”
“Oh no! No more drinking for you, mister!” Palette scolded her husband as they all began to trot off, dog and all.
“I’m glad to see they’re getting along,” Rainbow Dash said. “I was afraid we’d be at each other’s throats after all of that.”
“If my family does one thing well, it’s causing disasters,” Thunderhead told her. “I think we feel closer to you now that we know your family causes disasters too.”
“Don’t you mean our family?” Rainbow Dash said, sidling up to Thunderhead. “Riiight, husband?”
“Right, wife.”
“… Pfft, let’s please not call each other that.”
“I make no guarantees,” Thunderhead said, leaning down and sneaking in a kiss.
“Pardon the interruption.” The couple received another surprise when they suddenly found themselves face to face with Thunderhead’s cousins Gale and Kitty. “You are Rainbow Dash, yes? Cousin Rainbow Dash now, I suppose?” Gale asked without any pretense.
“Er, yes?” Rainbow Dash didn’t quite know what was going on. Gale nodded once to herself before continuing. Kitty, for her part, just stood by nervously.
“I was just speaking with an acquaintance of yours.”
“Oh, who?” Rainbow Dash asked.
“I do not recall her name. She was bookish, horns, wings, accompanied by a dragon. That one,” Gale said as if she met thousands of ponies like that everyday. “Your friend is not the issue here. It has come to my attention via your friend that Taboo has not visited the doctor since after you came into contact with her, and this is including an instance where she fell ill with a uncommonly strong common cold. Is this correct.”
“Well, that’s only because-”
“Yes, you are afraid of your daughter being discriminated against. I understand.” Rainbow Dash was impressed with how sharp Gale was; however, the mare was a bit too direct for her tastes. “I am here to put an end to your worries. I practice at Cloudsdale Children’s Care, so I will become your daughter’s pediatrician. Word is Taboo will be in Cloudsdale with your parents this coming week, so I will schedule an appointment to give her a checkup.”
“W-wow. Thanks!”
“No need to thank me, just get your insurance information to me as soon as you can. Congratulations on your marriage. You too little cousin.”
“Thanks Gale,” Thunderhead said, somewhat unphased by her behavior. He had gotten used to it after all these years.
“Now, I will leave you to each other.” Without another word, Gale turned and departed.
“Ah, Gale, wait!” Kitty started after her, but then suddenly turned back around to the newlyweds. “Oh, where are my manners? Congratulations to both of you! Excuse me!” Kitty trotted after her sister, calling her name all the way.
“… So are they Cloudy’s kids?” Rainbow Dash asked out of curiosity.
“No, they’re my aunt Snowy Chance’s daughters.” A thought occurred to Thunderhead. He looked around the lawn, searching for his deviant uncle. “Where is that stallion anyway? This whole thing is basically his fault.”
“I wouldn’t go that far,” Rainbow Dash said, even if she did put a bit more stock in fortune telling after today. It felt like a stretch that his fortune telling caused the mess. Still, she took a look around the reception for him as well, but neither her nor Thunderhead could see him.
“Eh, it’s probably still at it. As long as we don’t ask him for a fortune, I guess he can’t cause us anymore trouble.”
“Mmm, I wouldn’t say today was all trouble,” Rainbow Dash said. “Think of all the good that came out of it.”
“It’s a girl!” As if on cue, Time Turner burst out of the hospital in a dead gallop. He was still wearing a smock and sporting a black eye, but he ran like he wouldn’t ever get tired. All the while he chanted the same thing. “It’s a girl! It’s a girl!”
“See, plenty of good came out of today,” Rainbow Dash said, nudging her new husband in the side.
“It’s hard to argue with that.”
“Mommy, mommy!” Taboo came trotting up and began bouncing up and down once she arrived at Rainbow Dash’s hooves. “Can we go see auntie Fluttershy’s foal? Can we? Can we?”
“Hold on, squirt,” Rainbow Dash said, picking Taboo up and placing her on her back. “Fluttershy is going to need a little while to rest. It’s hard work having a foal. Let’s wait a little while.”
“Actually, we can go now.” The group turned around to see Twilight Sparkle accompanied by Applejack, Rarity, and Pinkie Pie coming up behind them. “Turner passed out from seeing the blood, so he was a bit late getting the news. I talked to the doctors and they said Fluttershy said she could see some visitors as long as they’re quiet.”
“So we can go? We can go, we can go we can go!”
“Only if we’re quiet, Pinkie,” Twilight said.
“Oh, I can do quiet!” Pinkie bragged, but on what precedence nopony knew. “Somepony just say they can be quiet, but I do quiet like nopony’s business. Don’t think I’m just a one trick party pony because I can certainly play quiet when I have to like I have to right now and you bet that I’m going to…”
“Aaanyway, we should get going,” Rarity said to get the group back on track. “We shouldn’t keep poor Fluttershy awake longer than we have to, and I know you two will want to get going soon.”
“Huh? Get going?” Taboo asked, looking at her parents. All Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead could do was smile sheepishly at her, but Taboo had already put two and two together. “You’re not doing that thing where the married ponies go away, are you? You’re not leaving me here, are you?”
“… Well, we’re not leaving you here, per se,” Rainbow Dash said, trying to explain herself. “You get to stay at grandma and grandpa’s!”
“You are leaving me!”
It was then that Rainbow Dash realized that the night was far from over.
“Hey you. You want your fortune read?” Chance asked the stallion passing his table.
“Huh, me?” Thunderlane looked around. The strange stallion seemed to be talking to him. “Uh, I’ve never had my fortune told.”
“First time for everything,” Chance said. “C’mere, take a seat.” Thunderlane obeyed, pulling up a chair and sitting himself down. Chance began shuffling his cards while his client sat by awkwardly.
“So how does this work?”
“You got a question about your future?” Chance asked, getting the ball rolling. “Remember, specific questions bring specific answers.”
“Well… maybe it’s just because of the day, but I guess I do have some questions concerning romance.”
“Any specific questions?”
“Well, let me think.” Thunderlane meditated on his question for a few moments. He didn’t want a vague answer, so he decided there was one question he could ask that would give him a nice, clear answer. “Have I met my true love yet?”
“Hm, right to the point. I like it.” Chance placed the deck on the table and had Thunderlane cut it. After that was done, Chance pulled the deck back to himself. He lay three cards down on the table. He stared at them for a moment, cocked an eyebrow, and then rearranged them. After he had done that, he began placing more cards on the table. Thunderlane wondered if this was the normal protocol, but he didn’t say a word as Chance put down a grand total of ten cards on the table.
After that, Chance didn’t say a word. He just stared at the cards. Thunderlane switched between looking at the cards and looking at the fortune teller. He couldn’t even guess what any of the cards meant, but he waited patiently for Chance to say something; however, after about five minutes it became clear that he wasn’t going to say anything.
“Um… so… what’s the verdict?”
Chance looked up from the cards at Thunderlane. He blinked twice, looked back down, and then looked back at Thunderlane. “Yes, but no.”
“… What?”
“That’s the answer to your question: yes, but no.”
“That doesn’t make any sense. How do you know that?” Thunderhead asked, but Chance just shook his head. He began putting the cards back into his deck.
“Right, you’re right. It doesn’t make any sense. It probably won’t happen like that,” Chance said, muttering most of what he said under his breath. “When I was young the tragedy of fortune telling was that pretty mares always wanted to know where true love was hiding but the answer was never ‘behind a deck of tarot cards.’”
“What’s that got to do with anything?”
Chance stopped before picking up the tenth card, the ace of cups. Thunderlane regarded the card for a moment himself, burning the image of the single, silver cup into his mind.
“Because now that I’m old I know the real tragedy of tarot had nothing to do with the dealer.” With that, Chance put the final card back into his deck and put it away. “I’m always forecasting disasters with my fortunes, but that is only because it keeps me from forecasting these kinds of tragedies. I’m sorry.”
“Ah, wait!” Thunderlane called after the stallion, but he trudged off rather quickly. Thunderlane was left to puzzle over the issue himself. “What did he mean ‘these kinds of tragedies?’” In the end, Thunderlane just concluded that fortunetelling isn’t real after all.
“Ohmygosh, she is so. cute.” Rarity was close to breaking the limited volume rule as she slowly began losing her cool. In her defense, the newest addition to Fluttershy’s family was pretty adorable. “She almost makes me wish I had one of my own… almost.” Pierce could be heard breathing a sigh of relief.
“Did you pick a name for her yet?” Twilight asked.
“We decided on names a little while back,” Fluttershy said in an audible whisper. She was a bit too tired to manage much more as she rocked her newborn gently back and forth. “Spruce if it was a boy, and if it was a girl… Weepy Willow.” Already little Willow had fallen asleep. Being born was just as much of an ordeal as giving birth.
“Aww, a cute name for a cute little foal,” Pinkie Pie said. “I’m going to have to throw her a party… later of course.”
“She’s so tiny,” Soarin’ said, even if nopony really knew what in the world he was doing here. His presence at least gave validity to the claim that he and Pinkie Pie were now an item. “She looked bigger in the womb.” He wasn’t scoring many points with Pinkie’s friends tonight.
“Shucks, this is all too much for me.” It was clear from her quivering lip and moist eyes that Applejack was feeling pretty overwhelmed. “All in one day my friend gets married, another friend gives birth, and soon ah’m gonna meet my new niece… or nephew! Consarnit! I ain’t gettin’ any sleep tonight, am I?”
“I see that this one doesn’t come with wings,” Rainbow Dash said, getting a little giggle out of Fluttershy.
“Honestly, I was hoping she would be an earth pony. I don’t think I could handle the thought of my baby flying around,” Fluttershy said, hugging Willow closer. She gazed down at her daughter lovingly, caressing her pink mane gently. “Mommy went through a lot of trouble to get you here, but I would do it all over again.”
“Psst, hey.”
Rainbow Dash’s ears perked up. She turned to see Thunderhead peeking in through the door, which indicated it was almost time to go for them.
“Go on ahead,” Fluttershy said without looking up at Rainbow Dash. “We will all be waiting for you here when you get back.”
Rainbow Dash suddenly felt tears coming on, which was not very cool. “Aww, why did you have to go and say that. You’re gonna let me hold her when I get back, right?”
“Of course.”
After a few more quiet goodbyes, Rainbow Dash was out the door with Thunderhead. After her fit about finding out her parents were going on Honeymoon, Taboo had tuckered herself out and fallen asleep. Palette managed to wake her up to say some groggy goodbyes to her parents, but she was asleep again in an instant. She was undoubtedly going to be upset in the morning, but Thunderhead and Rainbow Dash couldn’t miss this train.
Despite the excitement, both Thunderhead and Rainbow Dash found themselves asleep for the whole train ride. Rainbow Dash was still in her wedding dress and Thunderhead was still wearing a tuxedo, but even in those stiff outfits and lumpy train seats they found a bit of rest. They slept up until their stop, which seemed to come about too quickly. In a sleepy haze, they managed to get to the resort and check into their room. Exhausted, they both collapsed onto the bed. After a very, very, very long day they found themselves completely alone with one another.
Thunderhead became aware that he was all alone with his wife on their wedding night. He was absolutely amazed he had gone the whole day without thinking about this moment, but now that it had arrived he couldn’t think about anything else. Looking over at Rainbow Dash on the bed beside him, he knew exactly what he wanted. He rolled over and slowly embraced her. He could feel her shaking, no doubt thinking exactly what he was thinking.
“That scary, huh?”
“Y-yeah…”
“… We don’t have to-”
“No, tonight,” she said, still trembling.
“… Good, because I’m not sure I can hold back anymore,” Thunderhead said, not sparing his wife from his honest feelings. “I promised to love you forever in front of our daughter, a dog, and a riot of our friends and family. Now, behind closed doors, I want to make that same promise to you and be intimate with you.” Rainbow Dash started shaking even more. It was becoming clear to Thunderhead what her concern was.
“I-I want t-to as well.” Rainbow Dash had lost every bit of her cool, and it was painful for Thunderhead to watch. She had been so confident when she pounced on him on the couch all that time ago, but tonight that same confidence was gone. He shamefully had to admit it was pretty cute.
“We’ll take it slowly, alright?”
“W-wait!” Rainbow Dash suddenly sprang up and backed away. Thunderhead stood up to, alarmed at the dramatic retreat. “There’s one thing… there’s something I want to say before we… s-start.”
“Of course,” Thunderhead couldn’t imagine what she was about to say, but the words that came out of her mouth scared the living daylights out of him.
“I wanna get pregnant.”
Thunderhead just stared at her. He was sure he heard her loud and clear, which was what was so distressing. It was a lot to process all at once.
“I-I, sorry, that come out wrong!” Rainbow Dash instantly apologized, her voice the only thing shaking more than her body. “I mean, no, I do wanna get pregnant. I mean, I wanna have a foal, with you, your foal, our foal! You know what I’m saying!”
“Yeah, I know what you’re saying.” Thunderhead hadn’t even thought about this yet. “Are you sure?”
“Yeah, I’ve got it all worked out,” Rainbow Dash told him, revealing that she had indeed premeditated this. “I should have time to have a foal before I’m eligible for Spring Tryouts at the Wonderbolts. If I get pregnant now, I’ll have time to have it and then get back in shape. I know being a Wonderbolt and a parent might be hard, but we’ll already have to take care of Taboo, right? What’s another kid, really? We know ponies who can sit for us and I know I’ll have the weekends off. I can even fly home during breaks if I’m quick enough, which I’m pretty sure I am. If anypony can pull it off, I can. Plus, you’ll be there to help, right? I know we can do it… and besides, after I started taking care of Taboo I started really wanting to have another kid, you know? It’s weird, but I just thought it might be cool and fun to start from the beginning and raise a foal that I gave birth to. N-n-n-not that I would love Taboo any less or anything! I love Taboo, and I’m sure she’d love to have a sibling and tha-mphmph!”
Before Rainbow Dash could say anything more, Thunderhead pinned her to the bed and kissed her as hard as he could. She struggled a bit, and then she struggled a lot. Weakened by her intense nervousness, she couldn’t throw Thunderhead off; however, he was not unsympathetic. It was just that he had found her little speech very sexy somehow.
“W-what are you doing?”
“Getting you pregnant, I guess,” he said, repaying her bluntness from before. He began littering her neck with kisses while she tried to formulate a response; however, there was practically nothing she could say. She was having trouble thinking, realizing that despite all her nerves she was harboring a bit of lust herself. When Thunderhead’s lips touched hers next, she didn’t reject it. She allowed him to tower over her. It wasn’t very cool, but there wasn’t anypony else watching.
Once upon a time, she only allowed herself to do those embarrassing, uncool things when nopony was looking, but that night something strange happened. Her scared, nervous, longing, tearful, whining, giggling, completely unflattering self was drawn out by somepony else. Instead of shying from it, Thunderhead loved her all the more for it. He showed her just how close two souls in could become entwined despite having started out as complete strangers. The change that had occurred in her life became entirely clear to her. Willing, she embraced it.
11
“Aaaauwgh… close the blinds!” Rainbow Dash pulled the sheets over her head and curled up into a ball on the bed. She tucked the blanket in around her, forming a perfect little cocoon to shield out the light. Thunderhead wasn’t exactly enjoying the sudden reintroduction of sunlight, but the clock was clearly indicating that they had slept well past noon. Despite how groggy and disoriented he felt, there wasn’t an ounce of regret in his mind about how he had spent last night.
“Dash, we gotta eat, bathe, and get outside a bit.”
“I disagree,” Rainbow Dash said, poking her head out of her ball.
“On what grounds?”
“There isn’t any reason to do any of those things,” she said before withdrawing back into her ball. “There’s nothing to do outside and there’s no point in bathing since we’re just going to get dirty again.”
“What about eating?”
“Hmm, I know what we could eat,” she replied, slowly rising from her curled up position. She grinned devilishly at Thunderhead, biting her bottom lip. Thunderhead managed to swallow the giddy feeling in his gut, even though he really, really, really didn’t want to.
“We can’t just spend our whole Honeymoon cooped up in here.” Even as he said it, he found himself hoping Rainbow Dash would disagree with him.
“We haven’t even tried yet,” Rainbow Dash said, hopping off the bed and crossing towards her lover. He stood on stiff legs as she rubbed up against him, still abundant in the fragrances of mingled sweat and lovemaking. As of last night, he was no longer the one in control. He put up a good front, but it wouldn’t take much from Rainbow Dash to get him to submit. Even now she was just toying with him, flicking him with her tail and breathing against his neck.
“Gaah! We have to at least eat something!” he shouted with involuntary force as he marched away from her. Of course, retreat as he might Rainbow Dash followed right behind as she slid in under his wing. She put her warm body against his and hummed deeply. He knew this was all going to culminate in sex one way or another, but his pride forced him to put up an earnest fight first.
“… Alright, we can eat,” Rainbow Dash said, suddenly separating from Thunderhead. A cold chill ran up his spine, sensing this conversation wasn’t over. Rainbow Dash walked slowly, each step seeming to rock her hips hypnotically in front of Thunderhead. He felt like he was losing his mind as she gave him a sultry look from over her shoulder. “Would you go get some food while I sleep a little more?”
“S-sure.” Something still wasn’t quite right. Her gaze was holding, and he found himself drawn in by her guilty smile.
“But I’m going to need something to help me get back to sleep,” she said, not even trying to hide her attempt at seduction. She wiggled her rear end right at him. “How about it?”
Like a trained animal, Thunderhead heeded the call with admirable ferocity. He knew the feeling of having earned it was just an illusion, but the real crime would’ve been turning her down. Besides, both parties knew that once this week was over they would be living with a child. This was their one chance to satiate their physical desires before practicing restraint became an absolute necessity. As the newlyweds laughed and rolled about on the bed, Rainbow Dash laughed as she said what had almost become her battlecry since last night.
“Why didn’t we do this from the start?”
Taboo sat dejectedly on her rump and stared out the window. It was only the first day of her parent’s honeymoon, but she already felt like it was an eternity. She was bored right out of her mind, but perhaps that was understandable. There wasn’t all that much for her to do at her grandparent’s house.
Palette was not unsympathetic to Taboo’s plight; however, she was powerless to do much. It didn’t help that Taboo was unwilling to do anything but pout. There was a remote possibility that she’d get over it after a day or two, but that didn’t remedy the fact that today was going to waste. Palette was at a loss, and additionally she didn’t have Birdie to back her up today. It would take something close to a miracle to liven things up.
*knock knock *
“I wonder who that could be,” Palette said, wandering over to the door. She hoped it wasn’t Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead back already. Maybe it was the neighbors looking for their hawk again. Palette opened the door.
“CONGRATULATIONS SUBJECTS ON YOUR SUCCESSFUL NUPTIALS!”
Palette was almost blown away by the mere force of her visitor’s voice. In fact, she found she had somehow slid back a few feet from just being in front of the mare while she greeted her. As for the identity of the pony on her doorstep, it only took Palette a few seconds to recognize her.
“P-p-p-p-princess-”
“YES. TIS I, PRINCESS-”
“Cadence?”
“CADEN-huh? No, no I’m Luna.” Luna made a note to get out to Cloudsdale more often in the future. She also noticed that the pony she was talking to wasn’t actually Rainbow Dash, but rather the mare who was a strong candidate to be her mother. It did make sense, considering this was Rainbow Dash’s childhood residence. “Um… is your daughter here?”
“No, she’s on her honeymoon,” Palette said, still confused about which princess was at her house and why. “Don’t you know? She got married yesterday.”
“Yes, I realize this,” Luna said with a regretful sigh. “I had conditioned my sleep cycle so I could attend the ceremony and then shift seamlessly back into being a creature of the night, but my calculations were just a little off.”
“Like a day off?”
“No, I still intended to do my job that day.” Luna cleared her throat, realizing that the issue was currently something different. “I could not find a trace of Rainbow Dash in Ponyville, so I assumed she might have come here. I suppose I was wrong again, unfortunately. And now it seems that Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead are on their Honeymoon, and I dare not go to disturb them during that. Rather, I am afraid of what I might witness.
“Anyway, I just wanted to give my congratulations to the couple. Their relationship has been something like my soap opera for the past year or so. I suppose I will have to find entertainment elsewhere for the time being. Nothing quite so interesting goes on domestically, much to my misfortune.”
“Oh… well… I’ll tell Rainbow Dash you stopped by,” Palette said. “Is that all?”
“Yes, that is all I have to convey.”
“Okay, I’ll just let her kno-”
“WAIT!” Luna shouted all of a sudden, actually knocking Palette onto her back this time. “There is actually something else I feel I should mention at this juncture.”
“… And what would that be?” Palette remained on the floor for the time being.
“It is something concerning…” Luna stopped mid-sentence. She perked up, noticing somepony else in the house watching the door from afar. The curious set of eyes poking around the corner could’ve only belonged to one pony. Palette got up and noticed what had caught Luna’s attention.
“Taboo, won’t you come say hello to Princess Luna?” Palette asked, but Taboo only shrunk from the Princess’s gaze. Luna managed her most earnest smile, lowering herself closer to Taboo’s level. Without moving towards her, she extended a hoof in friendship.
“GREETINGS YOUNG TABOO.” Luna’s shouting caused Taboo to pin back her ears back and disappear behind the corner. Luna cursed her inability to lower her voice when she got excited. She wanted so badly to be better with children. “I suppose I should get going.”
“But what about the other message for Rainbow Dash?” Palette asked, but Luna was already preparing to depart. “I’ll make sure to tell her you came by.”
“Nay, my good citizen. Perhaps it is better I deliver this news in person,” Luna replied. “I shall wait until the appropriate opportunity, but thank you for your hospitality. I really must be going now.” Without another word, Luna spread her wings and flew off in the direction of Canterlot. Palette shut the door behind her, not wanting to let any more of the cold air outside into the house. She went back into the kitchen where Taboo had retreated. She was still there, staring vacantly out the back window.
“You know, you won’t be able to pout forever,” Palette said, taking a stricter tone than before. “You shouldn’t be rude to our guest just because you’re in a bad mood.”
“She was noisy,” Taboo said. She pinned her ears down again and donked her head into the window. “I don’t like noisy ponies.”
“That’s no reason to be rude,” Palette said. “And I’m sure by tomorrow you’ll feel up to having some fun. We get to go to the doctor so you can get a checkup. You’ve never done that before, have you?”
“No.” Taboo didn’t exactly understand why she had to go to the doctor at all, but her mommy had insisted on it. At the very least, she could put up with it for one day so long as mommy didn’t expect her to do it again.
“Thanks again for seeing Taboo,” Palette said. Gale didn’t say anything in response. She just wordlessly began her examination of Taboo. Her extremely deliberate nature was slightly unsettling to Palette. Gale was so on top of things she even scheduled the appointment at a time that they wouldn’t run into very many other ponies. Palette had been nervous about taking Taboo in to public, knowing that the citizens of Cloudsdale had no doubt never seen a pony like Taboo; however, at least in her preliminary examination Gale did not seem all that surprised about Taboo.
“Her size and weight are very average for a filly her age,” she said, marking her observations on her chart. “Her wingspan is a bit on the larger size. This is not an uncommon sign for stronger fliers.” Gale was obviously practicing a small amount of tact in her observations. She was sensitive to Taboo’s situation, as the filly was not capable of fully grasping the depth of her difference. Gale exchanged a look with Palette, letting her know that this issue of wingspan was not something quite so simple.
“Ah, well, her mother was able to fly from a very young age,” Palette said, playing alone with the charade. “I wouldn’t be surprised if Taboo started hovering around soon.”
“Really, you think I could?” Taboo said, her wings flapping in anticipation.
“With some practice, any pegasi could get airborne,” Gale said to her. “It is more of a matter of trial and error than it is physicality.” Gale continued her examination of Taboo. She checked her throat, her reflexes, had her take an eye test, and tested her blood pressure. Everything went predictably until she tried looking in Taboo’s ears. The filly wouldn’t stop flicking them once Gale almost got close enough to see. It was a bit of a struggle, but she finally got Taboo to comply.
“Sorry, but it tickled,” Taboo said, her ears still involuntarily flicking from having the doctor’s light in them.
“It is a bit preemptive, but I’d like to test something. Please wait for a moment,” Gale said, leaving the room with a sudden turn. She returned about two minutes later with an odd apparatus that Taboo had never before seen in her life. Before she could ask any questions of her own, Gale suddenly put earphones over the filly’s ears . “We’re going to do a hearing test.”
“I hope we’re covered for that,” Palette mumbled to herself.
“Taboo, please raise the hoof on the side you hear the sound, okay?” Gale asked, getting a nod from Taboo. Without waiting a moment, Gale started the test. Taboo suddenly startled, shooting her right hoof into the air. Gale looked down at the machine, wondering if she had left it turned on high accidentally. She was surprised to find the volume was only three quarters of the way up. She reduced it to halfway up and played the sound, getting Taboo to raise her right hoof again. The forty percent got a left hoof right away again. Taboo raised her right again at thirty without a missing a beat. The filly just stared absently at the ceiling, hitting the sounds right on cue at twenty five, twenty, fifteen, and ten percent. Finally at five percent, it took Taboo a second to respond; however, the sound should’ve been practically inaudible to a normal pony. The machine didn’t even have that setting for testing purposes, which left Gale looking shocked for the first time.
“Is it over?” Taboo asked when no more sounds came for a little while.
“… Hmm, ah, yes, you did well,” Gale said, doing well to cloak her astonishment. She pushed the hearing test to the side and decided to push on. She put on her stethoscope and put the cold metal against Taboo’s chest. She held it there, silently listening. She waited and waited, until she took the stethoscope off her head. “… Excuse me for a moment.” Gale left again, this time returning rather quickly with a new stethoscope. She put it to Taboo’s chest again and listened once more. Once again, she sat listening for a while without saying a word.
“Is… everything alright?” Palette had to ask.
“Yes, everything is alright,” Gale said, snapping back into doctor mode. She instructed Taboo to take some deep breaths. She listened to the air go in and out of her lungs. Gale could clearly hear her breathing, especially due to the absence of a very particular sound. “Very good. Taboo, I need you to do something for me.”
“What is it?”
“Pee in this cup,” Gale said, placing a sample cup before Taboo.
“Right here?” Taboo asked. “Right now?”
“Your grandmother and I will wait in the hall for you to finish. We will be right back,” Gale said, motioning for Palette to follow her. The older mare complied, following the doctor out of the room, down the hall, down the stairs, and out onto a balcony.
“Um… did we really need to go so far?”
“I don’t want Taboo to hear what we are about to discuss,” Gale said, a bit of worry sneaking into her voice. “I suspected I would find some interesting quirks, but this is unprecedented. At full extension, her wings are twice the average length of a pony her age. Of course, the anatomy of her wings is fundamentally different as well. You would hardly notice the difference if she kept her wings folded most of the time.
“Her hearing is astoundingly acute. I find it surprising that our normal speaking voices don’t upset her. Her ears would probably be even more fascinating than her wings if we could get a closer look at them, both helping her pick up nearly inaudible noises and filtering noise that might be offensively loud. I never conceived of anything like it.
“However, this a bit of distressing information too: I couldn’t hear her heartbeat.”
“She has no heartbeat?” Palette nearly fell over, but Gale caught her with admirable speed.
“No, she must have a beating heart in there somewhere,” Gale said, clarifying her point. “Her blood pressure is normal, which is proof that there is a heart working somewhere. The problem is that I can’t figure out why I wouldn’t be able to hear it with a stethoscope.”
“Is there a way to see what’s going on?” Palette asked, but Gale shook her head.
“Perhaps it would be best not to worry Taboo at this point.” Gale could do some invasive testing to get to the truth, but something about experimenting on Taboo didn’t sit well with her. “For now, I can guarantee she is healthy enough for the average pegasi. As far as I can tell, she only has one notable shortcoming.”
“Which would be?”
“I suspect her eyesight is not as sharp as the average pony’s.” Gale went on to explain. “Right now it probably isn’t so bad that it will bother her, but she struggled just a bit with the eye test. She might start needing glasses at a young age.”
“What does all this mean?” Palette found herself feeling a bit scared. She had come to accept that her granddaughter was different from other ponies a long time ago, but faced with the hard facts of the differences was something very different. That wasn’t to say she was scared of Taboo, but rather she was anxious about something else entirely. “If Taboo is this different, she’s going to notice soon.”
“I don’t have all the answers, unfortunately.” Gale put a hoof to her chin, pondering the subject a little. “If I may speak purely as an academic, Taboo’s family of pegasi probably developed in an extremely different climate from ours. Relying on hearing instead of sight indicates a dark environment, and a dark environment could also explain the long, thin wings favorable for flying based on a sensitivity to the air rather than sight. It is still merely conjecture, but perhaps also needing to rely on their hearing they developed quiet heartbeats so as to eliminate as much sound as possible.”
“So you do think there are others like her out there?” Palette asked, not sure what to believe herself.
“It isn’t impossible; however, I can’t say I know where they would reside.” Gale gave it a moment more of thought before starting to lead Palette back to the examination room. “Perhaps underground?”
“If they live underground, why have wings?”
“Perhaps flying is conducive to living in large, high caverns? Forgive me, but this is not my area of expertise.”
All Gale could really do was guess, as educated as she was. Palette wasn’t any more sure than she was on any topic. All they could do was continue the checkup, but of course when they returned to the room Taboo had yet to pee in the cup.
Today Taboo was alone in her grandparent’s house. Her grandma had gone to the store and her grandpa had to go to work again today, so for at least an hour or so Taboo had the house to herself. After yesterday, there was only one thing on her mind: flying. She hadn’t really given it all that much thought since she just always flew on her mommy’s back. Taboo had thought it was too early to fly, but the doctor had said otherwise.
Taboo stood in the middle of the den. She extended both wings out to her sides. She took a deep breath in. She began flapping them madly as hard as she could and as fast as she could manage. After twenty seconds of basically flailing her wings about, she stopped and began panting. There hadn’t even been the slightest sensation of liftoff.
Taboo caught her breath and tried again. This time focusing a little more and being deliberate with her flapping. She finally got into something of a rhythm, but it was on the slow side. Frustrated, she tried just beating her wings in a frenzy again. She lasted ten seconds this time before collapsing on the floor. It turned out that flying was just as hard as she anticipated.
After three or more unsuccessful bouts of violent wing beating, she decided that she was doing something wrong. She hunkered down and gave it a good long think. She tried to picture how her mother did it so easily, but it just looked like random wing flapping to Taboo. The only trick to it seemed to be trying as hard as possible.
Then Taboo had an idea. She realized she had been trying to lift off the ground using her wings, but she could already leave the ground by simply jumping. Enticed by her new idea, she began frantically jumping up and down and madly beating her wings once she was off the ground. Of course, this didn’t do anything either. This didn’t stop her from trying a few more times. Frustrated, Taboo bounded into the air one last time and gave her wings one, hard beat.
There was a brief moment of weightlessness.
Taboo landed on the ground just like every other time, but she swore she felt herself get a moment of hang time. She kept jumping and flapping her wings once, attempting to recreate that magical moment. It took many, many attempts, but she managed to emulate it a second time. After the second time, she got it a third time after a couple failed attempts. She got a fourth success soon after, with five and six following right behind.
She found the secret was to make sure she had her wings fully extended while she was flapping them. If she pulled them into herself, she would fall to the ground like normal. She also need to keep them as flat as possible as pointing them forwards or backwards wouldn’t lift her straight up like she needed.
With her newfound ability to get just the tiniest bit airborne, she moved onto the next logical step: flapping her wings more than once. Unfortunately, she found this much more difficult than she anticipated. The brief lift she got from the first flap only got her a brief moment more in the air, meaning she had to be super fast on the second flap. It was hard work to lift her extended wing back into the air that fast, so she always hit the ground before she could get the second beat in.
In a stroke of what felt like pure genius to Taboo, she realized if it was hard to pull her extended wings up she could try bringing her wings up while they were folded. She practiced the little maneuver on the ground: bringing her extended wings down, folding them in, extending them upwards, and then beating them back down. When she felt she had the motions down on the ground, she tried emulating them in the air.
Being airborne made her a little sloppy, so she didn’t even come close to doing it on her first try. She switched off going through the motions on the ground and trying them in the air. Bit by bit she started to get it. She got closer and closer, bridging the gap she needed to as she gained the confidence to move faster.
At least, a second wingbeat pushed her free of gravity for another magical moment in the air. Elated, Taboo practiced her one-two flaps. She had nothing but enthusiasm and time, so her endeavor proved fruitful quickly. With a running start, she could even wing her way a bit down the hallway. It was exhilarating to be able to be able to get off the ground like that, but it wasn’t enough yet.
Taboo figured if she could get two flaps in, she could get three. She gave it a few tries, getting the third flap to lift her quickly since she’d figured out the basics now. Three wasn’t enough though, but it became clear to Taboo after a few more times that she wasn’t getting enough height for each of her wingbeats to keep her up for more than three.
In another stroke of genius, she decided to hop up on the coffee table to get some extra height. By jumping off it towards the ground, she have that much more height instantly. She jumped off the table over and over, flapping her wings in her careful ballet until she touched down. She wasn’t gaining any positive altitude over all, but she was having fun regardless.
As much as she was enjoying herself, all the work was making her a bit tired. She decided to take a break, adjourning to the kitchen for some refreshing juice and a cookie. Taboo felt like she had earned it today, learning to take to the skies practically all by herself. She rested for a good while, restoring the energy in her wings and limbs. Refreshed, she decided she should hurry back to the grindstone so she could show grandma what she could do once she came back.
As usual, Taboo took a leap off the table and began beating the air with all she had; however, she had a little more in her rested wings than before. When she felt herself move upwards with previously unknown velocity, she landed hard after just one flap of her wings due to her surprise. She realized she had actually gotten a deal of additional height out of that jump.
Absolutely elated, Taboo hopped back onto the table and prepared to jump off again. She readied herself for the experience this time, taking a deep breath as she jumped again. She instantly began flapping her wings with practiced strokes, and this time she stayed suspended in place over the ground. Taboo was absolutely beside herself with excitement as she stayed put with each consecutive wingbeat. She thought to herself that she was actually doing it, she was truly flying.
It then struck her as she hung over the ground that true flying actually involved a bit more upwards movement. Resolved to get as far as she could, Taboo doubled her effort to flap her wings. She felt herself start to lift, departing from her suspension as if drawn upwards by a rope and pulley. The higher she got, the more her excited wings propelled her upwards. She watched the floor of the house move away from her as he got higher and higher and higher and-
*bonk *
Taboo’s upwards journey came to an unanticipated end as she collided with the ceiling. Thrown off by the sudden obstruction and subsequent reintroduction of gravity, Taboo found herself going down. Panicked, she closed her eyes and curled up into ball as the coffee table approached quickly from below.
“Taboo, I’m back!” Palette flew into the house, bags of groceries secured to her sides. She moved right into the kitchen and put her things on the counter. She began unpacking, absently humming to herself. “Taboo? You around?”
“Y-yes! I’m here,” Taboo said from the den. Palette looked up briefly to see Taboo sitting in the middle of the den. She looked down at her groceries again for a moment, but then stopped what she was doing. She looked back at the den.
“Taboo, what happened to the coffee table?”
Taboo looked back at the coffee table. There was a nice sized hole in it, as if somepony had stepped clean through it. Taboo continued staring at it for a second, but looked back at Palette after a few seconds. Her only reply was to shrug.
“… Oh… okay.” Palette knew Taboo was responsible. The only evidence was that Taboo had been the only one around to commit the crime, but other than that Palette couldn’t prove it. She couldn’t even begin to imagine how Taboo could’ve done it. Despite the clear guilt written all over Taboo’s face, there was no decisive evidence about. Palette had only one thing to say. “We need to get out of the house tomorrow…”
It was a snowy afternoon in Ponyville, the town covered in a blanket of fresh snow as big, wet snowflakes danced down to the ground. It was a beautiful sight if a pony was warm and comfortable inside, but not the kind of weather anypony wanted to be outside in. Even so Pokey Pierce, Time Turner, and Big Macintosh stood outside of Carousel Boutique in scarves and hats sipping on warm cider. Inside the boutique, their wives hardly even noticed their absence which was a big relief to both Turner and Big Macintosh. Being new fathers was tougher in practice than in theory, so they were glad to finally have a quiet moment to just celebrate. Of course, there was a celebration of sorts on the inside of the boutique as well. Despite the quiet snowscape outside, the little shop buzzed like a beehive in the grips of spring.
“Isn’t she juuuuuuust the cutest?” Poison Apple doted over her newborn granddaughter, who stared up at her grandmother with reserved curiosity. “Our little Applerose! Ain’t she just the cutest most itty-bitty thang you ever saw?”
“Yes, yes, Poison, she’s precious,” Palette said, cradling the sleeping Willow in her own hooves. She was amazed the foal could be so peaceful with this eccentric mare practically yelling about Applerose every other second. Palette had already paid her congratulations to Roseluck, but for some reason she had to keep congratulating Poison as if she had achieved something.
“I gotta say, my little Junior sure can pick ‘em!” Poison said with a proud grin permanently glued to her face. “He picked a cute little wife so he could have adorable little foals like I always wanted. He’s such a mama’s boy! I mean, look! His first foal looks just like me!” Even if the foal sported a red coat like her grandmother, most everpony agreed she took more after her immediate parents. Applerose’s green eyes and orange mane carried not resemblance to the Apple matriarch holding her.
“Well, I’ll bet you’re all relieved that she’s here with you now,” Palette said. “You’re officially part of the mares who have ‘been there once.’”
“Been where once?” Taboo asked, looking up from Willow, but her query went unanswered as Poison took control of the conversation once again.
“Hah! I’ve been there as many times as everypony else in the room combined!” Poison boasted. The other mares in the room checked her math, finding she was right on the money. “I hope y’all are ready for round two!”
“I think we’ll be waiting for a while,” Roseluck said, dashing Poison’s hopes of getting her second grandfoal within the next year. “One is more than enough for now.”
“Well shucks! I want to see more foals around here!” Poison looked absolutely serious. “I guess it’s up to you, Jackie!”
“I ain’t married, Ma,” Applejack said to her mother, but Poison didn’t even flinch before responding.
“Well that ain’t absolutely necessary, is it?”
“M-ma!” Applejack stood up with a start, blushing profusely. “There are children here!”
“Your niece and Fluttershy’s foal can’t understand what we’re saying,” Poison said to assure her. “And Taboo’s folks weren’t married before she came along.”
“Yeah, but they did get married!” Taboo interjected, reminding everypony of recent events.
“That’s right, so don’t get hung up on the order of things, Jackie!” Poison returned Applerose to her mother so she could confront her own daughter up close and personal. “Just don’t tell your father I told you that because he’s a bit of a stickler for the rules… even if that does make him a bit of a hypocrite. Nothin’ like a little bit of motivation to get a stallion to the altar, ya know? Remember that colt you had a crush on in school? Oh, what was his name?”
“M-m-ma!?”
“Oh? Applejack had a schoolyard crush?” Rarity said, much more interested in this topic now. “Do tell Mrs. Apple. Do tell.”
“Oh no! You do not want to go down this road, Rarity,” Applejack said, glaring right at the unicorn. “I will turn this mare on you if I have to.”
“Please, you’ve got nothing.” Rarity stuck up her nose and grinned.
“Hey Ma, Rarity’s thinkin’ about havin’ a foal too.”
“Is that true?” Poison was on Rarity faster than she could say “whoops.”
“Huh? What?” Rarity suddenly found different parts of her body being ogled and handled by the older mare, who was surprisingly strong for somepony of her stature and age. “Oh, wait! Ouch! Don’t do that! What are yo-*giggle*-ack! Hehe, that tickles! Stop! *snicker* Stop !”
“Hon, you are so very skinny.”
“Oh, why thank you!” Rarity missed the part where Poison wasn’t paying her a compliment.
“I used to have a girlish figure like that too before I had Junior,” Poison said, painting a picture that Rarity found somewhat distressing as she regarded her own slim frame. “Yeah, imagine pushing that fella out of those tiny hips! But don’t worry, you’ve got the kind of body that’ll fatten right up to get that foal out!”
Rarity stood as rigid as a board. A single hair jumped out of place in her mane as her eye twitched twice.
“My body was never quite the same after Junior. Whoo, and I sure did try everything to get it back! It didn’t help when I had to pop Jackie out too. It was even more of a struggle to maintain a nice body after that, but after quite some time I came close. Then I had Applebloom and gave up! I shoulda figured that trying to restore my body to pre-pregnancy shape would just lead to another pregnancy. It’s a vicious cycle, it is!”
“Well then… I guess there’s only one thing to do,” Rarity said with a kinda-sorta smile on her face and a crazed look in her eyes. “No foals for me.”
“Well, shucks! Somepony has to have a foal,” Poison said, determined to get her way. “How about you, Fluttershy?”
Unfortunately, Fluttershy had already taken a cue off of her foal and nodded off for a little nap. She had been doing a lot of that recently, tired from giving birth for the first time in her life.
“… Well, I guess she already made her contribution to the cause.” Poison moved onto the next candidate. “How about it, Princess Twilight?”
“… Um… I’m still adjusting to being an aunt,” Twilight said. “There is no way I’m ready to be a parent. Besides, I’m in the same camp as Applejack: I’ve got nopony to make a foal with. I just don’t have the time for that kind of thing right now.” Everypony was surprised at how composed Twilight had managed to answer that question and how reasonable her response sounded.
“Oh… uh, okay.” Poison sat back down, having suffered a total defeat.
“Hey, what about me?” Pinkie Pie threw her hat into the ring. “I’ve got somepony and I love kids!”
“But Hon, you are a kid,” Poison said, her wisdom ringing true with everypony else. Pinkie Pie tried to fight her on that, but she couldn’t think of one thing she could say in her own defense; however, gave Poison a look to convey that this battle wasn’t over yet. Poison didn’t notice. “Well, at least there’s one pony I can count on.”
“You don’t mean my daughter, do you?” Palette asked, getting a knowing nod from Poison. “Well… I suppose you’re right.”
“Mommy is gonna have a foal?” Taboo asked, jumping up all of a sudden. “Really?”
“Maybe,” Palette said, smiling down at Taboo. “That’s up to her and daddy.”
“Does that mean I’m going to have a little sister?” Taboo began bounding up and down excitedly, her wings fluttering gently out of habit and excitement. She had not yet up until this point realized that her parents were capable of having another child. It kind of made her wonder why she didn’t have a sibling already.
“Again, that’s up to them.” Palette had told a little lie. She knew for sure that her daughter was going to go and get herself pregnant. She chalked it up to a mother’s intuition, but she couldn’t imagine it going down any other way.
She found it odd that she was thinking that way, considering that it wasn’t all that long ago that Rainbow Dash had sworn off ever having kids of her own. Palette had only been holding onto hope that her daughter might start changing her mind on the day she suddenly showed up with Taboo in tow. Palette had just been satisfied to have Taboo be her granddaughter, but it only took a couple of time seeing her daughter with Thunderhead to make it clear that the two were destined to have at least one more kid.
Palette had also done the same math that, unknown to her, Rainbow Dash had also done. She good feeling her daughter had figured it out too, and there was no way the daughter she raised would pass up such a picture perfect window of opportunity. If she also knew anything about her daughter, there was also another thing she could say for sure.
“Also, mommy might want to get you a little brother,” Palette said.
“A little brother?” Taboo scrunched up her face and furrowed her brow. “Why? Why would she do that?” The thought of getting a male sibling seemed to deeply offend Taboo.
“Oh, you’ll just have to ask mommy when she gets back.”
“But-”
“Shhshhshh.” Palette hushed her granddaughter. “Careful, or you’ll wake little Willow here.”
“Well, that was delicious,” Birdie said, sitting back in his chair. “It was worth coming all the way out to Ponyville just for that!”
“Oh, thank you,” Fluttershy said, blushing a bit. “B-but I’ve got a lot of experience cooking, so it’s really not a very big deal.”
“I’ll bet it’s better than anything my daughter can do,” Palette said, equally satisfied with the meal. It was still snowing outside in the dark, but the inside of Fluttershy and Turner’s cottage was nice and cozy. It helped that there were plenty of warm bodies around to keep things toasty. “And as much as we love Thunderhead, he doesn’t seem like the cooking type either. Don’t you think, Taboo?”
“I like mommy’s cooking!” Taboo defended her mother, but then turned to her empty plate and scrunched up her face a little. “… But auntie Fluttershy’s is better.”
“Now that dinner is out of the way, how’s about a little drink?” Birdie asked, giving Turner a knowing look. “If you share a little of that Sweet Apple Acres cider with me I’ll impart a little fatherly wisdom on you.”
“Uh… well.” Turner scratched his head and looked towards his wife.
“It’s okay, I can handle things here,” she said, giving him a smile and a nod. “I’m feeling much better today, especially after my nap today. I can take care of Willow if she wakes up.”
With license to leave, Birdie and Turner went to have their drink while Palette and Fluttershy cleaned up. With Taboo playing with some mice on the floor, Palette suddenly felt a lot more domestic than she cared too with the stallions out relaxing while she and Fluttershy worked; however, Fluttershy seemed absolutely thrilled to be washing dishes. Considering how sedentary she’d been before, perhaps getting to do anything felt like an adventure.
“I’ve got to say, Fluttershy, you’ve come a long way since you left Cloudsdale,” Palette said, taking a dish from Fluttershy to dry. “You’ve really got a nice thing going here in Ponyville.”
Fluttershy didn’t answer, at least not audibly. She just beamed and blushed, her wings flitting a bit behind her. She never imagined being quite so set either, and sometimes she didn’t think it was all real. It was hard to refute the hard evidence that she had started her own family, something she wouldn’t want to awaken from if it was a dream anyway.
“You were always so reserved as a kid, the yin to Dashie’s yang I guess. I just wanted to say I’m proud of how far you’ve come.”
“Thank you, Mrs. Palette,” Fluttershy said, blushing and smiling all the while. “I’m glad we could spend this time together, especially now with Willow having arrived. I’m still a little lost on what to do.”
“Well, you’ve been doing a good job so far.” Palette patted Fluttershy on the back with her wing. “But honestly, Willow is an awfully quiet foal. I know Rainbow Dash was constantly crying and fussing when she was a newborn. It felt like she hardly ever slept for a solid hour, but I’ve hardly heard a peep out of Willow since I got here. She sleeps, eats, and fusses to be held. She must take after her mother.”
“Oh, well, I’m sure she’ll be more trouble later!” Fluttershy said as if she had to apologize for Willow’s good behavior. “She’ll probably grow up to be a troublesome child! … N-not that I want her to, it’s just, I just-”
“See, there’s the Fluttershy I know.” Palette laughed a little, glad to see that overall nothing had changed; however, that thought made her a bit sad. She put a hoof around Fluttershy and drew her close. “Willow’s parents are good ponies. I’m sure she’ll grow up to be confident and strong.”
Fluttershy’s initial reaction was mixed. She smiled, but then immediately grimaced as tears started welling up in her eyes. She tried her hardest to smile and thank Palette, but her throat burned as it became impossible to not cry. That’s how Palette ended up comforting a bawling Fluttershy in the kitchen when Taboo wandered in out of curiosity. She watched Fluttershy cry freely while her grandmother patted her on the back, hushing her and cradling her all the while.
“Grandma?” Taboo finally got up the courage to enter the scene. “Is Fluttershy alright.”
“Y-yes, I’m okay.” Fluttershy managed to speak up before Palette did. She smiled at Taboo, tears still shining in the corners of her eyes. She even laughed a little, which struck Taboo as a little odd. “You know, Taboo… your grandma is kind of like a mother to me.”
Taboo didn’t exactly understand, but Fluttershy didn’t give her time to ponder it.
“Taboo, you love your mommy and daddy, right?” she asked out of the blue.
“Yeah!” Taboo said without hesitation. The answer was pretty clear for someone as naïve and young as her, something Fluttershy picked up on even as she smiled gently at the young pony. “They’re the best!”
“Good… that’s very good.” Fluttershy sniffled a little. “Always remember how much you love them right now, alright? Hold on to that love.”
Taboo understood even less what Fluttershy was talking about, but Palette heard what she was saying loud and clear. A bit of unwarranted darkness fell over her face, considering the future for a brief moment. She had gotten a sobering reminder of what would inevitably happen one day just this week.
“Oh, listen to me babbling,” Fluttershy said, wiping her eyes and standing up. “I’d better run upstairs and check on Willow. Excuse me.” Fluttershy flew off to her upstairs, leaving Palette and Taboo alone once again. The pair had spent a lot of time together this week, but the day after tomorrow Taboo would be living with Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead fulltime again. Palette was glad for the little vacation from normal, even if it did have its share of odd moments.
“Yep, that’s the good stuff!” Birdie said, reentering the room with Turner. Both ponies had wisely limited themselves to one drink, one due to new responsibilities and the other because of a very recent embarrassment. “You sure you still don’t want any, honey?”
“If I have any, I won’t be able to fly straight back to Cloudsdale.”
“Well, do we have to go back to Cloudsdale?” Birdie asked, scratching his chin a little. “We could always shack up at Rainy’s for the night. It would save us the trouble of flying all the way home in this cold.”
“Tempting, but how are we going to get in?” Palette asked.
“I bet she left her house unlocked. You know how she is.”
“We aren’t breaking into our daughter’s house,” Palette said, firm on that point if only because she would prefer to just go home.
“Oh, you wouldn’t have to break in,” Fluttershy said as she descended the stairs. “Rainbow Dash left me the key so I could go feed Tank if I was ever feeling up to it.”
“Well then, I guess that settles it,” Birdie said with a sly smile. “How about it, Taboo? Want to spend the night at your house?”
“Mmhmm!” Taboo nodded her head with energized bobs. Sleeping in her own bed sounded really nice. Outnumbered two to one, Palette was forced to comply. On the condition they leave for home first thing in the morning, she agreed to let Fluttershy guide them from her cottage to her daughter’s house up in the clouds.
“Well, here we are,” Fluttershy said, unlocking the front door. “Cloud, sweet clou-*crash*-EEEEK!” Fluttershy jumped as something came crashing down the moment she opened the door. It only took a glance around the back of the door to see she had knocked over what appeared to be Thunderhead’s armor.
“Mommy keeps telling daddy he should move it somewhere else,” Taboo said, trotting on inside. “And daddy says the house isn’t big enough.”
“It could do with some renovations,” Birdie said, following his granddaughter inside. “I see a big project coming in the near future.”
“I would be happy if she would just redecorate.” Palette was never a huge fan of the Wonderbolts, so the fact that her daughter insisted that everything she owned be covered in their logos and images didn’t really jive with her. Even so, she entered on inside while Fluttershy set to trying to put Thunderhead’s armor back where it was.
Everypony else went upstairs, tired from their respective days. There were a few more pointed comments regarding Rainbow Dash’s decorating sense, but other than that they found themselves drained. It seemed like everypony was about to go down for the night, but then Taboo suddenly shot up from her bed.
“Something up?” Palette asked, sitting up from her daughter’s bed.
“I thought I heard something,” Taboo said, her ears swiveling around as if searching for the sound.
“… I don’t hear anything,” Palette said, knowing full well she probably wasn’t going to be able to hear whatever it was Taboo was listening for. Taboo, for her part, didn’t seem all that bothered by it. She seemed a bit frustrated that she couldn’t identify whatever it was she thought she heard, but in the end she lay back down.
“I guess it was nothing.”
“I guess so,” Palette said, laying back down herself. “It was probably just Fluttershy locking the door behind her or something.”
Oddly enough, Palette was closer to the truth than she realized.
“Honey, was that you?” Turner said, calling downstairs in an audible whisper. He didn’t want to wake Willow up, even though he just checked up on her sleeping soundly. When no reply came from downstairs, he began descending the stairs to check it out himself. “Honey?” he asked with a little more voice than before.
“In the den.”
“Ah, I thought I heard the door,” Turner said, arriving at the bottom of the stairs. He was surprised to find the entire downstairs was completely dark. He also noted that the usual cast of animals had apparently retreated elsewhere. Examining the slightly eerie changes to his house, he wandered into the den. “Are Rainbow Dash’s parents all settled?”
“Yes… so they won’t be here to bother us.”
“… Huh?”
“Come closer.” Fluttershy beckoned from somewhere in the den, but Turner didn’t see her anywhere. He moved towards the sound of her voice, even though he was still extremely confused. “Clooooser…”
“Um, are you feeling alright?” No sooner had Turner asked this than something flew into him and pinned him to the couch. When he got his wits about him again, he realized it was Fluttershy standing over him; however, something about her was different. “F-Fluttershy?”
“Oh, I feel better than alright,” she said, her blood red eyes gazing deep into her husband’s. Even in the darkness, Turner could place the changes in her appearance. The slitted pupils, the tufted ears, and the webbed wings gave it all way.
“What happened?”
“I don’t really know,” Fluttershy said, getting down close to her husband. “I was trying to put Thunderhead’s armor back together when something got stuck to me. It felt kind of funny at first, but then I started feeling much, much… muuuuch better! There’s just one problem.” Fluttershy sat on his belly, staring lustfully down at him.
“Which is?”
“It’s been so long since we’ve done it.” It was completely out of character for Fluttershy to even allude to “it.” Time Turner suddenly felt a chill run up his spine, but it was also accompanied by a kind of guilty anticipation as he realized what was inevitably going to happen. “I know I look like this, but a mare needs what a mare needs. I need you, Timey. Won’t you give me what I need?”
Time Turner had become a pile of incoherent psychobabble at this point. If he had any objections, he sure didn’t do anything to express them that night.
Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead flopped down onto the bed, both of them more spent than a child’s allowance in a candy store. The evidence of having lived in glorious squalor for the past week was strewn about them. The floor was literally covered in empty pizza boxes, seeing as pizza was the only thing the pair could order at any hour of the day. A pyramid of disposable coffee cups stood in a pyramid beside the closet. There was a miasma of cheese smells, body odor, burnt out candles, and coffee rinds permeating the air. Pillows were strewn about all over the place, including beneath and on top of overturned furniture. The comforter that was originally on the bed had disappeared into the ether somewhere, but at some point a bath towel had found its way into the mix. In other words, it looked like a hotel room.
The occupants, of course, smelled much like the room they’d been occupying. They’d been at least bathing regularly, but the complimentary hotel soaps and shampoos were only so powerful. Plus, they had run out of shampoo around day three and began rationing the soap since then. Halfway through the last day, they found their cave-dwelling lifestyle was suddenly turning on them. Lethargy had somehow crept into their bodies, but nopony felt like sleeping.
“You know, we could go outside together for once,” Thunderhead said. Rainbow Dash had managed to live the last couple of days inside the room subsisting on coffee, pizza, and various other unmentionables. “It’d be shame if we came all the way out here and didn’t at least go out onto the beach once. Maybe it’d give room service enough time to clean up this mess.”
“… Maybe.” Rainbow Dash didn’t want to immediately concede to Thunderhead’s idea. She hadn’t been taking orders from him all week, so she wasn’t about to start right at the very end. “I’m not sure I remember what the sun looks like.”
“I’m pretty sure the hotel staff thinks I have you trapped in here.”
“Please, you’re the one stuck with me.” Rainbow Dash got up off the bed and stood on the pizza box floor. “… I guess we had a good run.”
“That’s an understatement,” Thunderhead said as he joined her atop the trash. “I know ponies joke that couples do nothing but have sex on their Honeymoons, but I think we overdid it.”
“Ha… overdid it.”
“At any rate, let’s get out of here. I think the beach would be a refreshing change of scenery.”
In the end, Rainbow Dash was more than happy to exit the confines of the hotel room for a couple of hours. They cleaned up as well as they could and wandered out onto the streets. The sunlight felt amazing after being cooped up for so long, a warm embrace unlike any other. The two were content to just trot along at first and stretch their legs, but it didn’t take long before they ended up by the waterside. That’s how on the last day the newlyweds ended up doing the most clichéd romantic thing imaginable: taking a long walk on the beach. The results were shocking.
“Alright, now I regret staying in the room for so long,” Rainbow Dash said, leaning on Thunderhead as they walked right where the waves would crawl up onto the sand. As the waves passed over their hooves and receded back into the water, they felt the sand seem to melt beneath them. The salt scent of the ocean rose up from the crimson waters, shining in the now setting sun. “Looks like we stayed out a little later than we intended.”
“Any complaints?”
“Not really.” Rainbow Dash cuddled up closer to her husband. Thunderhead didn’t say anything about it, but Rainbow Dash was being a lot more affectionate than usual. He chalked it up to being a byproduct of their recent escapades, but he didn’t dare say anything about it lest it shatter her pleasant demeanor. If she knew she was acting girlish and sweet, she would probably make a concerted effort to act tough. He realized he had to savor the little moments like these; they weren’t bound to last long. “The sunset’s so pretty. Kinda makes you think Celestia is doing it just for us… which is cool of her considering how much I’ve done for her.”
“Yep, there it is.”
“There’s what?”
“Nothing.” Thunderhead wondered if he could the blushing version of his bride back for a couple of seconds. “So, what’re we gonna name our kid?”
“… H-huh? What?!” The look on Rainbow Dash’s face told him he’d struck gold. She backed off a little from him, but he sidled back up to her and got in even closer.
“Don’t tell me you haven’t given it any thought,” Thunderhead said, prying even further. Even if he was asking just to pester her, he was also genuinely curious.
“Ah, well, kinda, maybe, a little?” Rainbow Dash furrowed her brow and turned away. “I’m just going to play it by ear.”
“Are you hoping for a colt or a filly?”
“Colt,” Rainbow Dash answered within a second of being asked. It would appear she had given the topic of exactly what she wanted in her next child some thought after all. “We already have a filly, so now we need a colt to round things out.”
“What if it’s a filly.”
“Pfft.” Rainbow Dash seemed absolutely certain about this for some reason. “As if.”
“Alright, if you’re that sure about it.”
“Hey, you think I’m pregnant right now?” Rainbow Dash asked, making it Thunderhead turn to blush. “The little tyke could be growing inside me right now! It’s that nuts?”
“I think it’s a little early to say for sure.”
The pair stopped and stared out onto the horizon, both of them noticing the same blemish on the crimson sky. Far off over the waters, there was a dense, dark mass churning on some distant point. It was so far away that it might’ve been impossible to see it without the setting sun throwing a golden halo around it. It seemed wildly out of place, so the couple couldn’t help but notice it.
“What is that?” Rainbow Dash asked, squinting a bit to try and get a better look. “It looks like a storm.”
“I think that’s what it is,” Thunderhead said. “There’s some kind of local superstition about it. It apparently never goes away and always hangs around the same spot on the ocean.”
“Sounds like something to be superstitious about.” Rainbow Dash could tell based on how far away the storm was that it had to be massive in size, far bigger than any storm that would’ve been sanctioned by any competent weather patrol. “Do you know anything about it?”
“I haven’t really had much time to research it, but I’m sure you knew that,” Thunderhead said. “I heard a couple of tourists asking about it in the coffee shop once or twice. It’s got some weird name like Saxumtactūs. Legend has it that there used to be an island beneath the storm, but it was completely destroyed. Whether or not the story is true, it’s a cold hard fact that the storm is stupid amounts of dangerous. It’s illegal to sail or fly within a mile of it.”
“Kinda makes you want to fly within a mile of it and check it out,” Rainbow Dash said, but Thunderhead was not amused by the joke.
“Inclement weather is serious business, Dash,” he said, getting serious rather suddenly. “Storms even a fraction of the size of that one are responsible for disasters all around Equestria.”
“I think I know my weather. Don’t forget I used to be Weather Captain.”
“I’m not talking about your planned cyclone or stray thunderstorm.” Thunderhead was practically scolding Rainbow Dash at this point, which was worrisome. She didn’t know he could get so worked up about something like this. “These things are unforgiving giants. You might think it’s just weather, but nature can cook up some of the most unstoppable forces you’ve ever seen. I know you’ve faced a lot in the past, but when nature attacks all we can do is try and stick it out.
“You gotta promise me, if there is ever a freak storm in Ponyville or anywhere you are that you won’t do anything reckless. You’re not prepared to handle it. There are ponies who are trained to handle it, so leave it to us, please. I don’t want you flying into danger, especially if you’re carrying my child.”
“… Jeez, where is this coming from?” Rainbow Dash hadn’t expected that kind of speech from Thunderhead. Despite being told outright that there was something in this world she couldn’t handle, her pride didn’t even move to get in the way. He was genuinely concerned for her safety, for everypony’s safety. He looked so serious, she couldn’t help but smile. “As long as you promise you won’t get yourself hurt handling it.”
“It’s a promise then.”
“We keep making all these serious promises,” Rainbow Dash said, glomping back onto her husband’s leg. She drew him close and put her cheek to his neck. “I’d like to return to the part where we weren’t being very serious. Remember, everything goes back to normal tomorrow.”
“Back to normal?” Thunderhead chuckled to himself, realizing she wasn’t quite right. “Don’t you mean the new normal?”
“New normal, old normal. It’ll still be me, you, and Taboo.” Rainbow Dash pensively put a hoof on her stomach for a moment. “And somepony else pretty soon, I bet.”
“It’s gonna get crowded fast,” Thunderhead said, realizing that even now they were living in a one-and-a-half pony space with three ponies and one tortoise. “We might need to renovate.”
“We can make it work.”
“You won’t be saying that when there are four ponies trying to use one bathroom.”
“Then we can build another bathroom,” Rainbow Dash said, rolling her eyes. “Look, I don’t care if there are ten of us and we’ve got mountains of cash to spend. We’re going to live shoulder to shoulder.”
“There aren’t going to be ten of us.”
“Is that your only complaint?” Rainbow Dash leaned up and kissed Thunderhead before he could reply, effectively ending the conversation.
“Your master plan baffles me.”
“Just follow my lead.”
It was back and forth the rest of the way down the beach. They imagined that this is what it must feel like to be married, or at least married to each other. It was a lot like not being married, but with more sex. Without the slightest notion and the wildest ambitions of where they might end up in the coming years, they had willingly joined their fates together. As the last day of the Honeymoon officially ended, they ended up asleep in the same bed tangled up with one another. If they hadn’t been so soundly asleep, they probably would’ve looked at themselves and remarked at how appropriate the image was.
“Wow, is she always this quiet?” Rainbow Dash asked, looking down at Willow in her cradle. Fluttershy just nodded, not wanting to wake the sleeping filly. “I’ve been here for, like, an hour and she hasn’t cried once. This has got to be the quietest foal in all of Equestria.”
“Everypony says that.” Fluttershy wasn’t exaggerating, but she realized it was true.
“I thought Taboo was a light crier, but Willow puts her to shame.”
“Did I really cry a lot when I was that little?” Taboo asked, not realizing that it a few days it would only three years ago that she was that small.
“You still cry a lot.” Her mother patted her on the head, not that Taboo particularly appreciated it. “Applejack was telling me that Applerose is practically crying all night long.”
“It’s true from what I’ve seen,” Fluttershy said. “Poor Roseluck and Big Macintosh have had their hooves full, but Roseluck absolutely adores her daughter. I haven’t heard her complain once. She’s smitten with that filly.”
“I guess that’s a good thing for both of them.” Rainbow Dash chuckled, imagining Roseluck with her mane all disheveled and dark circles beneath her eyes as she rocks her child with a smile. The image fit the mare perfectly. The group went downstairs, where Fluttershy made an odd request of Taboo.
“Would you mind going out to feed the ducks?” she asked, entrusting Taboo with a loaf of bread. “They should be in the pond out back.”
“Sure!” Taboo scampered on out the door to perform the task before Rainbow Dash could either give permission or ask why. When Fluttershy turned to her with a serious look on her face, she sensed a more serious conversation coming on.
“I need to talk to you… about an… um… incident… that occurred while you were gone.”
“Does it have something to do with Taboo?”
“Oh, no!” Fluttershy said, but Rainbow Dash couldn’t help but notice how much her bashful friend was blushing. “It’s about… uh… you see… well… when I went to your house…”
“Okay, when you went to my house… what?”
“I, well, knocked over Thunderhead’s armor.”
“I keep telling him to put it somewhere else,” Rainbow Dash said. “It’s no big deal. You don’t have to worry so much about it.”
“Y-yes, but… when I put it back, there was something inside it.”
“Something bad?”
“Err… well, no?” Fluttershy didn’t seem quite certain of her own story, but Rainbow Dash just kept quiet and listened. “What it was… was, well, it got stuck to me. When it got stuck to me, I transformed into a… well, I turned into…”
“… Oh!” Rainbow Dash put the pieces together. “You turned into a night guard?”
“Y-yes… sorry.”
“Fluttershy! That, uh, whatever-it-is isn’t exactly safe. Thunderhead told me it’s like poison. Are you feeling okay?”
“Oh, I feel perfectly fine,” Fluttershy said, waving off any notions of her being poisoned. “In fact, I felt much better after I first put it on.”
“Really?”
“Oh… y-y-yes.” Fluttershy started shaking more than usual while she turned bright red. “A-a-and then I flew back here… a-a-a-and m-m-m-me a-a-a-a-a-and T-T-ime-e-e-e-ey-” Fluttershy didn’t dare say it out loud, so she leaned in close and whispered the final part into Rainbow Dash’s ear.
“… ARE YOU SERIOUS ?” Now Rainbow Dash had turned bright red. “Thunderhead wears that everyday… to work! And now you and your husband… I don’t even want to think about it!”
“Sorry, sorry, sorry!” Fluttershy apologized as quickly as she could while Rainbow Dash tried not to mentally picture anything she didn’t want to. “I was just possessed by this uncontrollable urge! It never happened again while I was wearing it. I even took it off and put it back on, but nothing like that happened again.”
“Why did you try and make it happen again?” Rainbow Dash immediately regretted asking that question as Fluttershy began to smile a bit despite her blushing. “Nevermind!”
“Sorry.” Her apology seemed a bit insincere given her little grin. “I just… thought I should let you know.”
“Yeah… I think we all would’ve survived without knowing all that.” Rainbow Dash wondered if Thunderhead could get a new one, and she also wondered how she could propose he do so without revealing her motives. “Besides, it also adds to the pile of mysteries surrounding Taboo.”
“Oh! That reminds me!” Fluttershy felt silly for forgetting about something so important. “Your mother mentioned that Princess Luna stopped by your parent’s house. She apparently had some kind of news for you.”
“Really? Well, thanks Mom for telling me about that!” Rainbow Dash’s mother had said nothing about this herself, but it was totally something she would do. Of course she mentions how her coffee table was inexplicably broken, but she leaves out the part where Princess Luna tried to deliver a message. “I guess it’s about time I paid a visit to Canterlot.”
12
“I’m glad to have a little extra company for this trip,” Twilight said, flying smoothly over the fluffy clouds. Spike road along on her back while Rainbow Dash flew by her side with Taboo seated on her own back. The Equestrian scenery passed placidly below them, bright and green once again in spring. “But we still could’ve taken the train.”
“It’s faster this way,” Rainbow Dash said, not wanting to address her real reason for winging it instead of taking public transportation. She had done a pretty good job of keeping Taboo out of the public eye recently, and she wanted very much to keep it that way. If she was being completely honest, she would have to confess she didn’t particularly want Taboo tagging along on this adventure. Unfortunately, Rainbow Dash’s absence due to her honeymoon had been leverage enough for Taboo to hitch a ride.
Taboo had never been to Canterlot, at least far as she knew. She couldn’t possibly remember going for the first time way back when she was first found, but there was a lot about that first year she still didn’t know; however, she didn’t even think to think about that sort of thing. It had been promised to her that she would get to meet the Princesses. She got to see Princess Twilight on a pretty regular basis, so she wasn’t all that exciting. What she wanted to do was meet all these new Princesses.
“Take a look, Taboo. That’s Canterlot right down there!” Rainbow Dash said, passing beneath the clouds as the city came into view around the mountain. Taboo’s eyes grew wide as she gazed upon the gleaming city, with its high towers and tall arches. It looked like something out of mommy’s books, like the kind of place she imagined Princesses should live. Even from up in the air, her ears picked up the sounds of ponies down below. There was the familiar, dull roar of a thousand ponies conversing in the open air all at once. She had never heard it so clearly before, almost as if she was down there walking amongst them all. She could tell there were a seemingly uncountable many of them, and as her mother took her closer the energy of the sound only got brighter. She grinned uncontrollably, seized by the electricity in the air.
Rainbow Dash didn’t cut corners in her flight pattern. She aimed herself at the Royal Castle and didn’t spare a second glance for the city. She stayed high above, alone with Twilight in the relatively empty airspace. Canterlot was populated by primarily unicorns, so there was only the odd pegasi here and there. Even so, she kept just high enough so that even Twilight wouldn’t draw any attention from somepony down below.
This cautious flight took them to an outdoor terrace of the castle, which wasn’t exactly the front door. The guards stationed along the portico on the outer edge of the garden balcony might’ve questioned two ponies flying in like that if it hadn’t been for the fact that one of those ponies was Princess Twilight Sparkle herself. Other than Twilight’s presence, there was another reason the guards, as many as there were, held their ground.
“Welcome, everypony. I trust your flight was pleasant,” Celestia said, rising to greet her guests. No less than five guards accompanied her, in addition to one Discord. Normally Rainbow Dash and Twilight Sparkle tried to ignore whatever gaudy costume the draconequus was wearing, but today he almost appeared to be begging for attention. As much as they wanted to reply to Celestia, they couldn’t get over the enormous, green-lensed goggles Discord was sporting, all four of the eyepieces telescoping in and out at irregular intervals. He was also shouldering a butterfly net while looking about like he was about to be ambushed. “Oh, don’t mind the extra security. There’s just a little disturbance here today.”
“What kind of disturbance?” Twilight asked, but Celestia just smiled and shook her head.
“It really is nothing, so please don’t worry about it.” Celestia really didn’t appear bothered at all, despite how on edge Discord and the guards looked. “There are more important things to be discussing.”
“Well, if you say so.” Twilight still wasn’t fully convinced, but she was more than inclined to trust her mentor. Spike and Taboo dismounted, the latter of the two making sure to keep close to her mother; however, her curiousity led her to look up at the Princess before her. Celestia was watching her too with that easy smile she so often wore.
“Welcome to Canterlot, Taboo,” she said, getting down to Taboo’s level. The filly didn’t cower further behind her mother, feeling very much at ease in this pony’s presence. “You probably don’t remember me, but I am Princess Celestia. It is very nice to officially meet you.”
Taboo didn’t say anything at first, but after a little prod from Rainbow Dash she managed to remember her manners. “I-I’m Taboo! It’s nice to meet you too, Princess!” Taboo bowed, putting her forehead to the ground.
“Discord, you remember Taboo, right?” Celestia stood back up and asked, but Discord wasn’t paying attention. “Discord.”
“Shh!” He shushed her without looking towards her. “She’s around here somewhere. I’m sure of it.”
“Relax, Discord. The situation is under control.” Celestia’s words did nothing to allay whatever stress Discord was under. Both Twilight and Rainbow Dash found it odd that Discord was the one being serious while Discord was on edge.
“I should be in there looking for that pipsqueak. I could’ve caught her by now” he said, swinging his net in some kind of demonstration of his prowess. “I don’t know why you insisted I come out here with you.”
“I thought you could use the company. Besides, it would be rude if you didn’t say hello to our guests.”
“Alright, whatever.” Discord looked down at the group that had just arrived, the lenses of his goggles whirring as they zoomed in on them. “Bookish, Tomboy, Dragontwerp, Eponymous. How’s tricks?”
“Nice to see you too.” Rainbow Dash thought that she could’ve done without his presence today. All she really wanted to do was talk to Luna, but she wouldn’t be available before she woke up for the night. Night was still some time off.
“I’m surprised you haven’t been down to Ponyville recently,” Twilight said, finally piquing Discord’s interest.
“Why, what’s going on in Ponyville?”
“You don’t know?” Twilight put a hoof to her mouth for a second, pondering something. “Maybe I’m not supposed to tell you…”
“Well, now you have to tell me.” Discord discarded his goggles, opting to stare down the two mares until they confessed.
“I think if you were supposed to know, you would know,” Rainbow Dash said, picking up on what Twilight was talking about. It made sense that Discord would be kept in the dark for the time being; there’s no telling how he might react.
“What? What are you guys talking about?” Spike asked. “Is this about Fluttershy giving birth?”
“Ex-SQUEEEEEEZE me?” Discord raised his eyebrows so far up they detached from his face and fluttered down to the ground. Rainbow Dash and Twilight shot Spike a couple of dirty looks, which Spike tried to play off by whistling and staring at the ground as he rocked back and forth on his heels. It was unclear if he had revealed this information knowingly or not.
“My, that certainly is wonderful news,” Celestia said. “I trust everything went well.”
“Yes, she had a healthy filly and has been doting on her every day since,” Twilight said, conceding to reveal the details now that the truth was out in the open.
“And why wasn’t I told?!” Discord snapped his net over his knee and crossed his arms. “Think of all the Uncle-ing I’ve missed out on already! If you’re going to indoctrinate chaotic principles into an unwitting young foal, you’ve got to start early!”
“Ever think that’s why nopony told you?” Rainbow Dash’s question went unheeded by Discord.
“We’ll be sure to go down to Ponyville to give our congratulations in person,” Celestia said. “I’ll make sure Discord behaves himself.”
“Oh great, more chaperoning.”
“Anyway, there’s no need for us to stay around here. There is somepony else who is eager to meet the two of you. Please, come along inside.” Celestia lead everypony to the interior of the castle, where Twilight and Rainbow Dash were somewhat unsurprised to see even more guards running here and there. For something Celestia was making out to be no big deal, everypony else seemed like they were in much more of a tizzy.
“What exactly is going on?” Rainbow Dash asked, making sure to keep Taboo close. With the filly right by her side, she lowered one wing to shield her even further. Taboo didn’t complain, somewhat put off by all the bustle herself.
“Well, if you really want to know about it I can tell you,” Celestia said, talking as she walked along before her guests. “There is an intruder of sorts, a changeling.”
“A changeling?”
“What’s a changeling?” Taboo asked, but her mother just shushed her.
“It’s only a small one,” Celestia said with a little laugh. “Everypony is worried that there are more, but she already told me that she’s the only one.”
“You saw it?” Twilight asked, suddenly understanding what all the concern was about. “And you didn’t do anything?”
“I talked to her. She told me she was spying on us.”
“And you just let her go?” Rainbow Dash asked, completely confused by everything going on. “She’s dangerous!”
“She’s no bigger than Taboo.”
“Huh?” Both Twilight and Rainbow Dash stopped dead in their tracks. Celestia stopped and turned to them as well, smiling and shaking her head.
“It was just a child. A brave little child, but completely harmless.” Celestia wouldn’t lie about something like this, let alone anything. If that is what she was saying, nopony could argue. “I was going to make sure she got out of the castle safely, but my guards saw her. It won’t surprise you to hear that scared her quite a bit. She ended up running away, so now we’re not sure where she is now.”
“Pardon me for saying this, Princess Celestia, but the situation might merit a little more caution,” Twilight said, being a reluctant voice of reason. “If the changelings are really spying on us-”
“Oh, I doubt that’s the case,” Celestia said, continuing on down the hallway. “She seems more interested in sweets than information gathering. I’ve given strict orders that she be escorted home should she be found. It isn’t safe for her here, and she must learn that. There is no reason to worry.”
“But-”
“No buts, Twilight Sparkle.” Celestia didn’t so much as frown at her student. Her tone was that of a teasing parent, keeping some nice secret from her child. All Twilight or Rainbow Dash could do was follow her and Discord along with their cadre of guards to wherever she was going.
It turned out their destination wasn’t far away. It ended up being the Royal Conference Room, a room for conferences of the royal variety. Upon seeing who was inside, Twilight realized they weren’t about to have a stuffy meeting with nobles or anything close to what she would usually call a conference.
“Twilight! You made it!” Cadence got up from her seat and smiled, joined by her husband of several years in the seat next to hers. “And Rainbow Dash as well! My congratulations on your marriage.”
“Thanks!”
“Wait, Cadence? Shining?” Twilight leered at her relations. “What’re you doing here?”
“We heard you were coming for a visit,” Shining said, standing up next to his wife. “Aaand we realize we’ve kind of left you in the dark the last few times we had big news.”
“So we decided to come here so you could be here when we made the official announcement!” Cadence finished the thought, smiling even wider as she clung to her husband. Both of them seemed absolutely giddy, which put Twilight on edge. She did appreciate being in the loop, but that didn’t save her brother and sister-in-law from her skeptical ire.
“You informed me of your marriage and pregnancy at basically the last possible moment both times. What in the world do you have to announce that you think makes up for all that?” Twilight asked, fully ready to throw their kindness right back at them should their announcement disappoint.
“Well, as it turns out, Twily,” Shining said, still smiling and refusing to back down. “We’ve gotten pregnant again!”
“You’re what?!”
“It looks like we’re going to add another pony to our family.” Cadence was still all smiles, as was Shining Armor. There were scattered well wishes from the present company, except Twilight who was too stunned to speak. Rainbow Dash tried to prod her back to life, but she wasn’t having it; however, whatever she was mumbling to herself finally became audible after a minute.
“Now there’ll be two. I have to worry about two of them…”
“I thought you’d be happier,” Shining said, disappointed his own sister wasn’t saying her congratulations. Especially after all the trouble they went to in order to get this news to her as early as possible, he expected a little gratitude. “What’s got you so bothered? Why can’t you just be happy for us?”
“Because, how many alicorns could we possibly need?” Twilight tossed her hooves into the air and mussed up her own mane in frustration. “This is going to get out of hoof if you two don’t stop making children!”
“Alicorn? I think not,” Discord said all of a sudden. He levitated himself over to Cadence and put his face a little too close to her mane than she was comfortable with. Nopony was comfortable with it after Discord took an enormous whiff of it without so much as a word of warning. “No, no alicorn. She’s got the distinct smell of unicorn, female.”
“It’s a unicorn?” Shining asked.
“It’s a girl!” Cadence forgot all about Discord’s invasion of her personal space. She hugged the draconequus, which didn’t altogether please him. He poofed out of her embrace, stealthily replacing his body with a plush dummy while he hid his real body behind Celestia.
“Well… that’s actually a relief,” Twilight said, calming down considerably. She took a deep breath and started over from where she should’ve started out. “That’s great you two! I’m glad you actually told me this time.”
“Hold on a second,” Rainbow Dash said, still stuck on what had previously happened. “Discord, you can tell exactly what a pony is pregnant with by smelling them?”
“It’s kind of like being a sommelier.” Discord poofed himself a little glass of wine and swirled it around while looking down at Rainbow Dash from out of the corner of his eye. “It’s all about practice and dedication to the art, really. You have to have a certain love of the craft in order to become a true master.” Discord took a sip of his wine and swashed it around his mouth a bit, looking up at the ceiling thoughtfully. After a few seconds, he expectorated his sample into a guard’s eye. Rainbow Dash swore she saw Celestia stifle a snicker while the guard writhed in pain.
“Then do me!” Rainbow Dash said, puffing out her chest and smirking. She already knew the answer, but part of her just wanted to hear Discord confirm it for the record.
“You’re not pregnant.”
“… You mean not very pregnant, right?”
“Not very and not at all,” Discord said, tossing his goblet somewhere where it never hit the ground.
“But you haven’t even smelled me yet!” Rainbow Dash stomped her hoof in protest, sure that all her honeymoon activities had to have borne fruit. Discord rolled his eyes and leaned in for a smell of Rainbow Dash. He took a half-hearted sniff and then promptly backed off.
“You need more potassium in your diet.”
“And?”
“Chocolate milk is a great source of potassium,” he replied, handing over a glass to the fuming mare. She drank down the whole thing in one go and threw away the glass, not knowing that it would explode once it impacted the ground. She disregarded it, preferring to sulk than acknowledge property damage.
“Oh, speaking of foals,” Cadence said, getting the ball rolling again. “I guess this little filly is Taboo.”
Taboo walked a little ways out from under her mother towards Princess Cadence. She had never seen this Princess before either, but she was very pretty and seemed very nice. The stallion next to her was kind of big and scary, but he seemed nice as well so she tried not to be scared of him.
“It is very nice to officially meet you,” Cadence said, giving Taboo a little bow. Taboo bowed back, even though she wasn’t entirely sure what the protocol on a bow was. She just ducked her head to the floor quickly and then lifted it back up. “And there is somepony else I’d like you to meet.”
“Oh, that’s right,” Twilight said, turning to Taboo herself. “I guess you and Nimbus are around the same age.”
“Nimbus?”
“That’s right, my son Nimbus is here as well,” Cadence said. “I think you two would be very good friends. He is out playing in the garden right now, so would you like to go out and meet him?”
Taboo turned to her mother. “Can I go?” she asked.
“Sure thing, squirt.” Rainbow Dash ruffled Taboo’s mane a little and gave her a kiss on the forehead. “You go have some fun.”
“Very good.” Cadence turned to one of two guards standing behind her. “Lightwing, would you mind escorting our young guest to the garden?”
“Of course, your majesty,” the armored mare said with a low bow. She trotted over to Taboo and smiled sweetly down at the filly. “Please come this way, young miss.”
“Okay!” Taboo went right to the guard’s side, an action that surprised Rainbow Dash. She was usually more cautious around strangers, but Taboo had thrown all caution to the wind after just a few words from Lightwing. She looked young and spoke very gently, but most ponies Taboo had met today were no different. Rainbow Dash puzzled over why that might be the case, but Taboo was already out of the room before she could inquire.
“I’m sure the three of you would like to spend a little time relaxing from your journey,” Celestia said to the two remaining mares and one dragon. “The castle is free to your use, provided you allow a guard to escort you. It is a measure that I’m afraid I am somewhat required to take considering the changeling situation.”
“Oh, it’s no trouble,” Twilight said. “I was hoping to spend a little time in the library before tonight. I doubt one little guard could distract me from that.”
“I’m glad to hear that because I’ve already assigned Flash Sentry to look after you today,” Cadence said, signaling to the other guard behind her. A very dashing young soldier trotted over to Twilight to bow, which caught her more off guard than she anticipated. He smiled up at her from his prostrated position, and she found herself wanting to remark on how cute he was. She didn’t say anything, but she also didn’t see Cadence smirking in the background.
“I-It’s nice to meet you!” Twilight almost bowed to him herself, but she realized that would’ve been out of order. Instead, she smiled back at him, but all she could manage was a forced, sheepish smile. It wasn’t like she couldn’t handle being around a cute stallion, but it was totally like she couldn’t speak to one. She tried not to think about how they were basically going to be in the library alone. She was thankful Spike would be there to make it a crowd.
“Meh, I’d rather not go to the library,” Spike said, causing Twilight’s wings to spring up suddenly. Luckily, nopony really noticed. “I think I need to pay a visit to the kitchen.”
“K-kitchen?”
“We can have somepony accompany you there,” Celestia said, gesturing to another guard to go take care of Spike’s request.
“B-but, the library!” Twilight was the only pony who seemed to acknowledge her own panic.
“Shall we go, your highness?” Flash asked, smiling right at Twilight. She awkwardly smiled back for a moment, but then avoided eye contact as she slammed her wings shut to her side.
“You can just call me Twilight,” she said in reply, although she wasn’t entirely sure why and started immediately kicking herself for doing so. They started moving towards the door, with Twilight walking stiffly right behind Flash.
“Twilight it is then,” Flash said, disappearing out the door. As soon as he was out of the room, Twilight turned around and gave Cadence a wide eyed look. She mouthed “did you do this” at her sister-in-law, but the only reply she got was a shrug. After Twilight was gone, Spike and his guard left as well. There were still other ponies to take care of.
“What do you plan to do, Rainbow Dash?” Celestia asked. “I know my sister was eager to talk with you, but she won’t be up for it until she’s awake. I’m afraid there isn’t anything I can do to speed up that process.”
“I’m fine waiting around,” Rainbow Dash said. She didn’t really have any other plans for the day. In retrospect, she wished she had taken the train and walked in order to fill out a bit more of her time today. “I’ll probably just mill around.”
“Well, while you mill around you will be escorted by Major Ship Shape,” Celestia said, gesturing to one of the staunch ponies posted next to her. “You’ll be glad to know your husband is one of his subordinates.”
“… ‘Glad to know?’”
“It’s an honor to meet you,” the Major said with a quick salute. “There will be no changeling attacks on my watch, day or night. You are in capable hooves, Mrs. Dash.”
“Well, I have business to attend to,” Celestia said, heading towards the exit. The guards still tasked with watching her followed behind, but the group only got as far as the door before Celestia stopped and turned. “Discord, come along.”
“Do I have to?”
“You don’t have to.” There was something oddly somber about her tone. Celestia turned towards the door, but stood in silence for a few moments. “But I would like it if you did.”
“Fine, I get it.” Discord levitated himself off the ground and slowly floated over to the door. “Just tell me I have to do it.”
“Thank you.” Celestia was chipper again instantly. She took her entourage out the door, leaving Rainbow Dash with her guard along with Princess Cadence and Shining Armor.
“Things are getting interesting around here, aren’t they?” Cadence said, chuckling a bit as she watched Discord’s tail slip out the door. “Hard to even imagine.”
“Imagine what?” Shining asked, trying to get a grip on what only Cadence seemed to be picking up. His wife just smiled and kissed him on the cheek, which he understood as a sure sign that she was not going to explain a darn thing.
“Go along dear. I’d like to talk to Rainbow Dash for a moment, if possible.”
“Alright, be safe.” Shining said, leaving the room and leaving Cadence with Rainbow Dash to talk while their respective guards took up a post outside. Rainbow Dash thought it couldn’t be easy for Shining Armor to leave is wife alone during another, albeit small, changeling situation; however, Cadence seemed determined to speak with Rainbow Dash.
“So, what did you want to talk about?” Rainbow Dash asked, taking a seat next to Cadence.
“I realize we haven’t talked all that much, just me and you, but we’ve got more in common than you might think,” Cadence said, but Rainbow Dash didn’t exactly follow. “Both you and I are raising children who don’t realize how different from everypony they are.”
“Nimbus doesn’t realize he’s an alicorn?”
“It’s not that he doesn’t know.” Cadence put a hoof to her mouth to think for a moment. The situation was more complex than just knowing or not knowing exactly what one was. “He’s too young to grasp the gravity behind it. He’s the first male alicorn to be born in… well… centuries according to Celestia.”
“I hadn’t thought about that,” Rainbow Dash said. Cadence really was in a similar situation, but there were some key differences. Nimbus knew other ponies who were actually alicorns, but Taboo didn’t know anypony who was truly like herself. It also sounded like he had actually been told he was different, where Taboo had been purposefully left in the dark for the time being. Even so, there was still one thing that had to be the same. “Makes you wonder how they’ll react when they finally realize it all.”
“To tell the truth, I was relieved to hear my next child is going to be a unicorn,” Cadence said, touching her stomach. “Unicorns are a lot less complicated.”
“You’d better knock on wood.” Rainbow Dash rapped on the table twice, prompting Cadence to do the same. “Twilight was a unicorn, and there’s nothing less complicated about her.”
“Aw, but that’d be so cute.” Cadence gazed up at the ceiling, picturing her coming foal in a few years. “It would be like having the tiny, cute Twily back. I’d be able to talk about colts she likes with her and I could play matchmaker with her all over again.”
“See, that’s why I want my next kid to be a colt,” Rainbow Dash said, but her meaning didn’t exactly click with Cadence at first. The Princess suddenly got a wild grin on her face.
“Oh, Dash! It’s a bit early to be deciding that!”
“Huh?” Now it was Rainbow Dash’s turn to be confused, but she put two and two together rather quickly. She blushed and quickly amended her statement. “No, no, no! I’m not trying to fix up our kids! I’m just saying I think I’d relate more to a colt than a filly.”
“You’re a girl and you relate to yourself.” Cadence had a point, but Rainbow Dash didn’t see it.
“If my kid is even remotely related to my mother, she’ll end up super girly.”
“You’re related to your mother and you didn’t end up super girly.”
“I can’t run that risk,” Rainbow Dash said, firm on this point. “It’s gotta be a colt. It’s gonna be.”
“Well, I see things are going well so far in your marriage,” Cadence said without so much as trying to hide her insinuation. “Nothing like a honeymoon to really get things heated up. I’m guessing because you two have Taboo back at home that you used your time wisely?” Cadence’s eyebrows went up and down rather suddenly on the word “wisely.” Rainbow Dash blushed and swallowed audibly, saying everything without even opening her mouth.
“Y-yeah… it was a good time.” Rainbow Dash composed herself and got back to more pressing issues. “I guess we didn’t manage to get me knocked up though.”
“Can’t hurt to keep trying.” Cadence was relentless, which made Rainbow Dash want to find an out for this conversation.
“Ah, well, I wonder if Luna is up yet!”
“Oh no, not yet.” Cadence stopped Rainbow Dash before she could try and go. “We’ve still got some other things to discuss. Twilight hasn’t been a good source of gossip for me, so I want you to fill me on a few things…”
“Young Master? Where have you gone?” Lightwing called into the garden, Taboo trotting along at her heels. So far the young alicorn had proved elusive, which was worrisome to the guard in charged with locating him. It wasn’t like him to give his caretakers the slip, and with something of a little crisis happening things didn’t bode well. “Oh, where could he be?”
“Is he hiding?” Taboo asked, not grasping the gravity of the situation.
“I hope so.” Lightwing hadn’t ever had this problem. If she called for him, Nimbus would come running. There were plenty of guards posted around the garden, but not one of them seemed to know where Nimbus had gone. “Maybe he went inside for a moment… yes, that has to be it. I will go inside and confirm it. Taboo, can you wait here for a moment?”
“Okay.” Taboo went ahead and sat right down on the ground in the middle of the path. Lightwing hadn’t meant literally where she was standing, but it was good enough for her as she trotted towards the castle interior. There were enough guards around to keep an eye on things, and she didn’t plan on being away for long either.
Taboo watched her go, still confused as to why she didn’t think Nimbus might be hiding. Her ears twitched, honing in on the pony she could tell was hiding nearby in the bushes. She turned her head to look, but of course the pony was well hidden. Taboo could tell the pony saw her looking, as the hidden pony began holding their breath. Whoever it was didn’t want to be found. They couldn’t hold their breath long either, gasping for air audibly while Taboo kept staring.
Determined to out the hidden pony, Taboo marched over to the bushes. She listened as her target started breathing faster, but they didn’t move. She stuck her head right into the bushes, instantly met with a pair of blue eyes staring back at her.
“Aaack!” Whoever it was instantly tried to retreat, turning tail to exit the bushes in the opposite direction; however, Taboo managed to get a good grip on the pony’s tail with her teeth. She pulled the struggling pony from the bush, dragging it into the path with her. “Let go of me!”
Taboo complied, releasing the pony and letting it fall flat on its face. It quickly stood up and faced her, backing up a few steps. Taboo smiled at the pony she’d found, but her kindness was met with a nervous glare. This pony was strange one from what she could see, but her mommy always told her not to judge a pony based on how they look.
“Hi! I’m Taboo.” Taboo introduce herself, still smiling. “Are you Nimbus?”
“… Y-yeah,” Nimbus said, sitting down slowly. The little blue alicorn stared at Taboo, looking her up and down and up and down.
“Why are you so scared?” Even Taboo could see the colt shaking. She figured he must be shy.
“My daddy told me there was a monster here,” Nimbus said. His eyes darted to the side for a moment. “Y-you’re not the monster… are you?”
“Do I look like a monster?” Taboo asked, her wings flexing innocently. Nimbus gave the smiling filly another look over, but this time he seemed to calm down. He managed to smile too.
“I guess not.” Nimbus flapped his own wings. “You’re no stranger than me!”
“Yep!” Taboo’s ears twitched again. “But is there really a monster here?”
“I don’t know, that’s just what they told me,” Nimbus told her; however, Taboo suddenly didn’t appear to be paying all that much attention. Her ears pointed straight up and her eyes were looking off the path again. “What? What is it?” Nimbus looked over to where she was looking, but he could only see a hedge.
“Somepony is over there,” Taboo said, beginning to move over in that direction. Nimbus followed her, albeit reluctantly.
“It’s not the monster, is it?”
Taboo didn’t answer him. The pair moved over to the hedge, but Nimbus still didn’t hear anything. He continued to follow Taboo when she jumped into the hedge, the pair pushing their way through branches and leaves. On the other side was just a patch of grass surrounded by more hedges, a place pedestrians weren’t actually supposed to go. Taboo kept venturing onwards, jumping right into the next hedge with Nimbus in tow.
Halfway through the second hedge, Nimbus could hear something too. Somepony was talking, but there was only one pony. Whoever it was seemed to be talking to themselves, or actually whispering to themselves. He could wrap his head around how Taboo had known this pony was back here. As they got closer, he could make out what the voice was saying.
“Oooooh, they’re all over the place. I can’t go out like this. They’ll catch me and put me in the dungeon, and mom will scold me if I end up in the dungeon. Stupid guards.”
“What’re you doing?” Taboo asked, hopping out of the hedge. The pony they’d snuck up on had its head in a different hedge, but upon hearing Taboo jumped out and turned right around. Taboo and Nimbus stared at this new pony while she stared at them. Neither party had seen anypony quite like the other one.
“Who’re you?” the new filly asked, putting her back against the bushes. Taboo kept staring at her hooves, which were full of holes. The black filly also had holes all over her wings and a hole right through her stubby horn. Even her green mane had little holes in it. Taboo thought she looked kind of funny. “Are you going to throw me in the dungeon?”
“Why would I do that?” Taboo asked, looking at Nimbus for some council. Nimbus looked confused too, still looking the changeling up and down. Neither Taboo or Nimbus had seen a changeling before, so they had no idea that they were actually looking at one.
“You can’t be the monster, can you?” Nimbus asked, not believing it in the slightest. “No, you’re just a filly.”
“I’m a spy!” she said, puffing out her chest. “I’m going to learn everything about Canterlot and surprise mom. Then she’ll praise me!”
“Who’s your mommy?” Taboo asked.
“She’s a queen,” the changeling said matter-of-factly with her chest puffed out a little further.
“Cool! My mom’s a princess,” Nimbus said.
“My mom’s Rainbow Dash,” Taboo said, wishing she had something more to brag about. “But I’m Taboo, and this is Nimbus.”
“I’m Venom,” the changeling said. She crouched low to the ground and looked around. “Hey… you wanna see something cool?”
Taboo and Nimbus just looked at each other, unsure of what that could possibly mean. They looked back at Venom and nodded, their curiosity getting the better of them. Venom scrunched up her face and began grunting loudly. Her horn sparked with green light a few times before coming to life with flame. It traveled down the length of her body, transforming her into the guise of a unicorn filly. She was panting by the end of the display, but managed to stand up right after a few moments.
“Tadah!”
“Whoa! That’s so cool!” Taboo said, cheering and clapping her hooves along with Nimbus.
“I’ve never seen somepony do that kind of magic,” Nimbus said, looking up at his own horn. “I can’t do magic yet. My aunt says that she’ll teach me soon.”
“My mom says I can’t show ponies that I can transform,” Venom said before grunting and straining to change back to normal. “But I don’t get why not.”
“Okay, my turn!” Taboo said, standing up and taking the stage as it were.
“You can transform too?” Venom asked.
“You already transformed. I’m gonna do something else,” Taboo said, spreading her wings. Just as she’d been practicing, she hopped into the air and flapped her wings in powerful, even strokes. She hovered easily above the ground, much more in control than when she’d done it at first at her grandma’s house. Taboo even gained some altitude and began flying in little circles above her new friends.
“You can fly?” Venom furrowed her brow and looked at her own wings. She flapped them, getting them to hum as they rapidly moved up and down but not getting off the ground. She’d tried a million times to fly, but she hadn’t even come close. Her mom told her changelings don’t usually fly until they’re older, but she didn’t care. She wanted to fly. “You’re so lucky!”
“Aww, I can’t fly either.” Nimbus flapped his own little wings, but he didn’t get airborne either. “You guys are lucky, being able to do magic and fly.”
“But I can’t fly!” Venom said, bouncing up and down to try and get airborne while she hummed her wings.
“And I can’t do magic,” Taboo said as she touched back down. “I don’t have a horn like you two.”
“But you can fly!” Venom squatted down low and jumped as high as she could, but it wasn’t at all effective in getting her any closer to flight.
“Not very high or far.” Taboo folded her wings back to her side, looking up at the clouds above. “I haven’t shown my mommy yet because I wanna get better before she sees.”
“My mom says I won’t fly until I’m eight years old,” Venom said, giving up on flying for the time being. “And I’m only three years old, so that means I’ll never fly!”
“Hey, I’m three too!” Taboo said, smiling and sidling up to Venom.
“And you can fly!” Venom’s lament seemed endless.
“I’m still two,” Nimbus said while they were on the subject. “I don’t really have any friends my age.”
“I don’t have any friends,” Venom said like it was a point of pride for her.
“Pound and Pumpkin are the same age as me,” Taboo said. She smiled at Nimbus and Venom. “And so are you two!”
“Mom says I can’t be friends with ponies.” Venom didn’t sound particularly thrilled about that rule. She smiled slyly, deciding what mom didn’t know couldn’t hurt her. “But she’ll scold me if she knows I went to Canterlot by myself, so I guess I can’t tell her that I made friends there anyway.”
“My mommy always said I should have lots of friends that are fillies,” Nimbus said, shrugging his shoulders. “She’ll be glad to hear I made friends with you two.”
“Young master? Taboo? Where are you two?”
“Hey, it’s Lightwing!” Nimbus said, perking up at the guard’s voice. “She sounds worried.”
“How could I lose both of them? The Princess is going to have me arraigned!”
“What’s ah-rain?” Taboo asked.
“I bet it means she’ll get thrown in the dungeon!” Venom said. “Maybe she’s a spy too.”
“Yeah!” It all made sense to Taboo now. “What’s a spy?”
“Young master! Taboo! Please answer meeeee!”
“We should probably go.” Nimbus jumped back through the hedge. “C’mon Taboo!”
“Okay!” Taboo was about to go, but she stopped and turned back to Venom. The changeling made no move to follow her, determined not to get thrown in the dungeon. “So… do you live in Canterlot?”
“No, I live in the Hive. Do you live in Canterlot?”
“No, I live in Ponyville,” Taboo said. “You should come and play sometime!”
“The guards won’t try to throw me in the dungeon there, will they?”
“No, Ponyville doesn’t have a dungeon,” Taboo told her. “My daddy is a guard, but he’s always asleep during the day. He wouldn’t throw my friend in the dungeon anyway!”
“Okay! I’ll definitely go to Ponyville!” Venom said, her wings buzzing happily. “I like that there’s no dungeon and the guards are always asleep!”
“But, if you can’t fly you can’t get up to my house,” Taboo said, realizing the trouble. “I live up on a cloud with my mommy and daddy, but you have to be able to fly to get up there.”
“I can’t fly myself, so I have Buzzword carry me around.”
“Buzzword?”
“He’s my pet.” Without missing a beat, Venom raised a hoof to her face and held one of the holes to her mouth. She took a deep breath and then blew right into the hole with pursed lips, causing an eerily hollow warble to rise up into the air. Taboo pinned her ears down, the loud noise offending her ears.
Venom kept blowing until the wind around the hedges seemed to pick up. As a shadow fell over the pair, Taboo gazed skyward to find her view was obscured by an enormous, bareheaded vulture. The monstrous bird let out a screech, scaring Taboo enough to make her jump into the hedge.
“Okay, I’ll see you later, Taboo!”
Venom, not at all bothered by the appearance of the hellish avian, jumped up and allowed the bird to snatch her up in its talons. With another screech, the vulture Buzzword took off back into the sky. Taboo could hear some of the guards around clamoring about chasing after the bird, but none of them sounded particularly eager considering the bird was nearly the size of a fully grown stallion.
Taboo could only watch as her new friend flew off in the grips of the frightening bird. All she could think about was how thankful she was that all she had for a pet was a tortoise.
“Princess Luna is ready to receive you, Rainbow Dash.”
Rainbow Dash walked along behind Major Ship Shape in the long shadows of the colonnade against the setting sun. It wouldn’t be long before Luna was putting the moon up into the sky for the night, and then Rainbow Dash would get a chance to finally find out what the princess had wanted to tell her. She wished Luna’s tower wasn’t so deep in the castle or at least that she’d moved closer to the tower beforehand. Unfortunately, Cadence had kept her busy with talking all about the goings on in Ponyville as of late. Rainbow Dash hadn’t really thought there was too much going on, but Cadence certainly had a lot of questions regardless.
“Your husband’s shift will be starting soon.”
“Hmm?” Rainbow Dash hadn’t expected the Major to speak up all of a sudden. He had barely said three words since he introduced himself earlier.
“Higher ups have been talking about him recently. He’s been making a good impression on the ponies around here ever since he started his new assignment.”
“I’m sure he’s glad to hear that.” Rainbow Dash didn’t pry too much into Thunderhead’s work. He was usually too tired to talk about it anyway, aside from complaining about how lazy Soarin’ was.
“Won’t do any good to tell him about it,” the Major said, surprising Rainbow Dash. She couldn’t get a read on the stoic soldier. “That boy thinks he’s got everything to prove.”
“What makes you say that?”
“He talks like he’s had it easy up until now.” The last glints of sunlight fade beneath the horizon as the Major takes a look out of the castle. “Honestly, most of us would do just about anything to get a personal assignment from the Princesses. He goes above and beyond the call of duty, perhaps of even what’s appropriate for that matter, and then he comes back here and complains that he hasn’t done enough.
“The guy’s hardest on himself, always stretching himself thin for somepony else’s benefit. He sticks his neck out for the princesses and then groans about how useless he feels after he succeeds. Stallions who are never satisfied with their achievements like that are some of the stupidest and pigheaded kinds of soldiers we get around here.”
“Hey!”
“And the real kicker is that he’ll probably running the whole show one of these days.”
“… Seriously?” Rainbow Dash knew Thunderhead was serious about what he did, but she hadn’t stopped to consider he might actually be really good at it too. She had a lot of trouble imagining him sitting at the top of the military hierarchy, as the pony saddled with the most responsibility.
“Fair warning, Mrs. Dash. They’re talking about making him a first Lieutenant so he can take over a chunk of the southwestern night patrols. He’ll probably make a fuss about getting promoted, but they say along as we allow him to stay in the field that he’ll comply and whip those lazy bums into shape.”
“Lazy bums?”
“Do you know what’s in the southwestern quadrant?” Major Shape asked, turning around to look at Rainbow Dash for a moment. “It’s basically just a huge desert. Nopony wants to take it seriously because they don’t think anything bad can happen in a sandbox, but there’s still Las Pegasus and some other folks out there. Thunderhead doesn’t like to slack off, so even if the other ponies in charge don’t want to change he’s going to run them ragged to get the results he wants.”
“So basically, give him the job nopony wants to do because he’ll do a good job anyway?”
“That slacker joint patrol he was put in charge of has actually been getting work done since he got placed in charge. The higher ups are going to keep utilizing that on a higher and higher scale until one day they find him sitting on top of them. After that, we’re all screwed.”
“That’s my husband for ya,” Rainbow Dash said with a smirk. “What makes you think I’m not going to tell him everything you just said?”
“Nothing really. Maybe if you hazard to tell him he’ll actually cool off and we’ll all be saved from a life of actual productivity,” Major Shape said. He heaved a sigh and shook his head, but then looked out at the rising moon. “It’s tough being an army in such a peaceful country.”
“You’re welcome.”
“Pardon me for saying so, but you two deserve each other.” The Major stopped in front of a pair of large double doors. He saluted to the guards on either side of the chamber, one of which knocked on the door. “Princess Luna is waiting.”
“Thanks for the chit chat,” Rainbow Dash said as the door creaked open. She walked into Luna’s chambers, dimly lit by a few candles. If Rainbow Dash didn’t know any better, she might assume Luna was trying to seduce her with the atmosphere; however, when the princess in question appeared Rainbow Dash could see that this was clearly not the case.
“Ugh… you’re so bright.” Luna rubbed her eyes before looking at Rainbow Dash again. The majestic and powerful Princess of the Night appeared to have the same difficulties as everypony else did when waking up. She levitated over a coffee pot and mug, pouring herself a hot cup before discarding said cup and taking a pull straight from the pot. “Mmm… coffee good.”
“… I can wait a little longer if you’re not ready yet.”
“Now is fine,” Luna said, taking another gulp of coffee. Rainbow Dash always took her for the coffee black type, but this went beyond her expectations. It made her curious about what Celestia was like after just waking up. “I’m useless until about one in the morning,” said the pony who just raised the moon.
“So what did you want to talk about?”
“I think I figured it out.”
“Figured what out?”
“Where Taboo came from.”
“… For real?! ” Rainbow Dash was up in the Princess’s business faster than her groggy eyes could follow. “And you waited until right now to tell me?”
“Dial it back, please,” Luna said, backing off and drinking some more coffee. “I’m not even in my crown yet.” Luna levitated a very old looking book up off of her desk and set it before Rainbow Dash. The golden writing on the cover was old and worn, but Rainbow Dash could still make out what it said.
“Pastor Green’s Herbal Remedies, Recipes, and Redecorating?”
“I found the spell to transform my guards in this book,” Luna said, opening the book with her magic and flipping through the pages. She stopped on a page marked with a long, red feather and presented the contents to Rainbow Dash. “Ingredients are not particularly easy to come by, but luckily a little goes a long way and we don’t need too many of these seals anyway.”
“Wow.” Rainbow Dash could barely wrap her head around what was written in the book, not at all versed in the arts of the herbalist or magician. “So… what does this have to do with Taboo exactly?”
“Well, the active magic ingredients of this spell cause the transformation.” Luna took a steep pull from her coffee, seemingly unbothered by the fact that it had to be extremely hot. “After I remembered where I found the spell, I realized one of these ingredients must be somehow linked with Taboo’s place of origin.”
“So which one is it?” Rainbow Dash said, turning her attention to the list of ingredients. “Is it Moonglow Moss?”
“Probably not. That moss isn’t really specific to any one area anyway.”
“How about Crushed Blood Root?”
“Blood Root grows along riverbanks at high altitude, the kinds of places we’ve already looked. I doubt that has anything to do with it.”
“What about Belly Vine?”
“That grows on the stomachs of Timberwolves… so I doubt it.”
“Garlic Powder?”
“You buy that at the store,” Luna said, scratching her own belly in a rather unprincesslike manner. “You can stop guessing; I already know which one it is.”
“Then why didn’t you say so?” Rainbow Dash asked, but she only response she got was Luna wiggling her coffee pot in front of her. “Oh, so which one?”
“Storm Lotus Extract.”
“What’s that?”
“A very good question,” Luna said, setting her coffee down for a change. “Of all the ingredients, this is the only one not native to Equestria. The Storm Lotus is a flower that only grows in areas completely untouched by sunlight. They got their names due to their tendency to wash into dark grottos after heavy storms out at sea. They have to be harvested and stored before the sunlight touches them or they simply crumble into ash.”
“You said they aren’t native to Equestria,” Rainbow Dash said. “But then where are they found.”
“The flowers only wash up on remote islands with the right conditions. There are a few famous ones where Storm Lotus’s will wash up quite frequently like Sick Bay and Poisoner’s Retreat.”
“Those sound like nice places.”
“Storm Lotus extract is famous for its poisonous qualities,” Luna explained. “It’s hard to obtain, nearly impossible to detect in one’s system, and causes a range of odd symptoms unlike any other poison. Most victims complain of feeling as if they are burning and sudden headaches. Higher doses can cause temporary blindness and calcification of the bones.”
“Fun stuff…”
“But unfortunately those islands are not the origins of the flower,” Luna said, getting ready to explain further. “All we know is that they travel from their source during stormy weather and some sailors have even reported seeing them rain down from the sky on overcast nights.”
“So, what this really tells us is…”
“Wherever Taboo is from, it’s somewhere out at sea. More specifically, the waters somewhere southeast of Equestria.”
“Huh, tropical.” Rainbow Dash said, scratching her head. She wasn’t very good with geography. “So, how many islands are down there?”
“… Well, I have good news and bad news.”
“What’s the good news?”
“The good news is that there are hundreds of islands that would be feasible geographically, and we haven’t searched any of them for Taboo’s relations.”
“And the bad news?”
“Most of them are known to be inhabited by creatures we already know of, and every last one of them is confirmed for not being the home of the Storm Lotus.” Luna smiled sheepishly, even though Rainbow Dash was visibly displeased. “… But she could always be from someplace underwater.”
“You really think so?” Rainbow Dash cocked an eyebrow, showing that she in fact did not think so herself. “I’m glad you found that recipe again, but we’re back to square one anyway.”
“I’m sorry this didn’t yield too much information,” Luna said, setting the book aside in favor of her coffee pot again. “But look on the bright side: now we now have evidence that Taboo did indeed come from someplace! I’m making arrangements to have the islands studied further. There are a number of interested scholars who just need a bit of funding to get things off the ground.”
“… Yeah, I guess that is better than nothing,” Rainbow Dash said, allowing the little victory to occur. “I guess that Lotus Extract stuff explains why ponies who put on that patch thing act so weird… speaking of which, is there an ingredient in there that might make a pony act… uh… affectionate?”
“Well, the cocktail causes several odd side-effects for ponies who haven’t gotten used to it yet,” Luna said. “But the main culprit for deviant behavior is the Lotus Extract, though. Why do you ask?”
“Ah, well, it’s just… Fluttershy accidently put on Thunderhead’s patch.”
“Oh dear!” Luna was suddenly much more awake. “Was Thunderhead alone with her at the time?”
“N-no! We weren’t there. She apparently flew all the way back home to find her husband and they… uh…”
“I see.” Luna put down her coffee again and narrowed her eyes at some distant point. “They mated.”
“Yup… that.”
“Well, I suppose congratulations are in order.” Luna was chipper again all of a sudden, taking a little sip from her coffee. “Fluttershy’s family will be adding another foal soon enough.”
“You can’t know that for sure.”
“On the contrary,” Luna said, giving Rainbow Dash a little wink. “The patch has different effects on males and females. Males when introduced to the concoction become extremely lethargic and begin to dismally recline about the environment for hours before they come back to their senses. Females become, as you put it, extremely affectionate. Why, when we first tried this charm out half of the mares who participated became pregnant!”
“Yeah, but that’s only half.”
“Yes, but it was the same half that managed to coax one of the stallions into mating.” Luna took another drink from her coffee, reminiscing on those early days of her guards. “Ah yes, we paid much in compensation for several years after that fiasco. After that we always had the sense to separate by gender when we introduced the charm to new recruits to prevent any more unplanned proliferations of the citizenship.”
Rainbow Dash wasn’t really listening anymore. There were gears spinning in her head, devious and calculating gears.
“I’m back!” Thunderhead marched in and began stripping off his armor.
“Long night?” Rainbow Dash asked, looking up at the clock to confirm it was already nine in the morning. That was past midnight in Thunderhead’s world.
“A couple of Bully Goats were wandering around the train tracks. It took a while for us to convince them to clear out,” Thunderhead told her. He took his charm off, placing it on top of his armor. “I could use some sleep.”
“Hold on there,” Rainbow Dash said, getting up and gliding across the room to him. “What if I could offer you something better than sleep?” She wrapped her forelegs around his neck and pulled him into a kiss. Thunderhead willingly let her seduce him, until he realized where he was.
“Wait, what about Taboo?” he asked, pulling away. Rainbow Dash continued to kiss his neck while he looked around for the filly, but she was nowhere to be seen.
“Yeah, funny story…”
Taboo’s ears suddenly perked up. She stood up from the table and left her breakfast where it sat, an act that didn’t go unnoticed by Rainbow Dash. She cocked an eyebrow, and watched her daughter wander into the den.
“What’s up? Bathroom?”
“I think I hear Buzzword.”
“You heard a what?”
Rainbow Dash nearly jumped out of her seat when an unholy screech suddenly sounded from the front of the house. She wondered how she could’ve missed a sound as horrifying as that as she winged her way over to the front door. She could hear strong wingbeats behind it, as if a large monster was preparing to strike. She waited for it to approach the door, but all she got was three tiny knocks.
“Hello?” The knocks were accompanied by a tiny voice. Disarmed, Rainbow Dash decided to open up the door. What she found on the other side left her speechless. “Is Taboo here?”
“Hi Venom!” Taboo said, popping out from behind her mother. “You came!”
“Sorry it took me a while!” Venom said, puffing out her chest. “Mom had me watched closely after I snuck of to Canterlot. Can you come out to play?”
“I’d have to ask my mommy,” Taboo said, looking up at Rainbow Dash. Her mother was still trying to process what was going on, trying to figure out if she should be more worried about the tiny changeling or the enormous vulture. “Can I play with her?”
“… W-where are you going to play?” Rainbow Dash wasn’t entirely sure that was the question she should be asking, but it was the one that came out. She decided to just see where things went.
“It has to be somewhere secret,” Venom said, crouching low on the cloud. “Because I’m a spy.”
“Can we go to Fluttershy’s?” Taboo asked. “Maybe she’ll let us feed the ducks and see Willow.”
“Yeah… that sounds remote enough.”
“Alright, let’s go!” Venom said, whistling at Buzzword. The vulture let out another screech before picking up Venom in one talon and Taboo in the other. The two giggling fillies were ferreted off by the monstrous bird before Rainbow Dash could get in another word. After recovering from the shock, she shook her head and finally made a rational decision.
“I had better go with them for now… before Fluttershy has to deal with a giant vulture and a changeling. Yeah, that’s a good idea. Then I’ll finish breakfast. Don’t panic, just fly…”
“Wow, that story is incredibly distressing,” Thunderhead said, not at all feeling in the mood anymore despite Rainbow Dash’s best efforts. “And you left them there?”
“The vulture flew off somewhere else after it dropped them off. Fluttershy agreed to keep an eye on things, and Time Turner is there too.”
“He doesn’t exactly have a good track record where guts are concerned.”
“It’ll be fine,” Rainbow Dash said, cuddling up to her husband. “This is the first time we’ve been alone in the house. We should make the most of it.”
“… You drive a hard bargain.”
“Oh, but there is one other thing.” Rainbow Dash trotted over to Thunderhead’s armor and picked up the charm. Before Thunderhead could tell her not to, she slapped it onto her flank and began to transform. It felt super weird at first, like all her hair was being flipped upside down and put back in. Thunderhead could only watch as all the colors on her mane turned different shades of blue while the feathers on her wings were replaced by thin skin. The transformation complete, Rainbow Dash examined herself. “Whoa… still hot!”
“Why is this happening?” Thunderhead asked. “Did Luna tell you about the first tests when you went to see her?”
“Uh-huh.” Rainbow Dash began eying her husband like a hunk of meat. The mannerism was actually par for the course considering their relationship, but it was more alarming for Thunderhead. “If you thought you were tired before…”
“It is soooo wrong that I’m kinda into this,” Thunderhead said, backing into the couch. In a rather nostalgic turn of events, Rainbow Dash pounced on him. “Okay, I’m a lot into this.”
“One time deal, stud. You’d better make the most of it.”
“You know, if we just added another bedroom to the house, we could have the master bedroom all to ourselves when we want to. As long as we’re quiet-”
“You need to be quiet now.”
“Fair enough, but I’m just saying-”
“Shhh, shh,” Rainbow Dash put a hoof to his mouth. “Do you know what I want to do?”
“Yeah, I’ve got a pretty good idea.”
“I want to plot a course,” she said. She leaned in and whispered into his ear. “Intercourse.”
13
“Alright, who’s next?”
“Your daughter, Venom, is here, your majesty.”
“Venom… which one is that?” Chrysalis said, scratching her head for a moment. “Aren’t there multiple Venoms? Eight… or nine, or is it eight now? Isn’t somepony keeping track of this?”
“She is here regarding a punishment for sneaking out again,” a servant said as the doors to the royal chamber opened up.
“Oh, that Venom! Ugh, that Venom,” Chrysalis slouched in her seat as the tiny changeling was lead up towards the throne. “I had heard she was still sneaking out, but I suppose she finally got caught... again.”
“Yes, your majesty.”
“Alright, let’s get this over with,” Chrysalis said, gesturing for Venom to approach the throne. The little changeling complied, her head hung low. She was fully aware that she was in big trouble again. “Come now, head up little one. Show your mother your face.”
“Yes, mom.” Venom lifted her head, but she didn’t look up at Chrysalis. She didn’t need to look to know the cross expression she was wearing. The Queen had told all her daughters over and over again that they are not to stray far from the Hive, but Venom had broken that rule on more than just a few occasions. She’d been caught flying back late from Ponyville last night, so now she was due to receive a royal spanking.
“Hmm.” Chrysalis scratched her chin. She looked Venom up and down, leaning from side to side to take her in from several angles. “My… you’re rather fat.”
Venom had no idea how to respond to that. She looked down at her own body, which by pony standards was still rather skinny for a child; however, Chrysalis was not judging her by pony standards. For a changling, Venom had plump cheeks and an ample gut. She had all the signs of being well fed.
“Tell me, Venom… where is it that you go when you sneak off?”
“… Ponyville.”
“Ah… Ponyville.” Chrysalis had never even heard of such a place. She shot a look to one of her changelings stationed by her side. He nodded his head to signal that it was indeed an actual town somewhere in Equestria. “Of course… Ponyville… so what’s in Ponyville?”
“I have a friend there.”
“A friend?” The confession shed some much needed light on the situation for Chrysalis. At such a young age, even a friendship could provide ample food. She didn’t know how in the world Venom had managed to make such a good friend, especially considering many a young changeling gets captured attempting such a thing. “I see… a friend.” Chrysalis smiled a wicked smile.
“Y-yes.” Venom hadn’t seen her mother smile like that before.
“My, what a clever little filly you are, to make a friend like that,” Chrysalis said. Venom instantly perked up, delightfully surprised by the sudden praise. She had expected to be scolded for breaking her mom’s rules, but that expectation had been turned completely upside-down. “I guess you will be wanting to see your friend again in the future, won’t you?”
“Yeah! I was gonna go see her tomorrow!”
“Ah, very good.” Chrysalis turned to another changeling waiting nearby. “Let the guards know that this child of mine has my permission to leave on her own tomorrow.”
“Very good, your majesty.”
“You mean I don’t have to sneak out?” Venom was a bit disappointed. Sneaking out was kind of fun.
“Nopony should have to sneak out to see their friend,” Chrysalis said, sounding just as sweet as she could manage. “Just let me know whenever you’re going on a little playdate.”
“I will! Thank you!”
“Oh, no need to thank me.” Chrysalis picked up Venom with her magic, levitating the little changeling over to her lap. She set her down and stroked her mane tenderly. “It’s a big, bad world out there full of bad ponies who want to hurt us. I only make my rules so that you and all two hundred something of your sisters can be safe. Not all of them can be so fortunate as you are, little Venom. Making friends is hard for a young changeling.”
“It wasn’t so hard! Taboo is super nice!”
“Oh, is Taboo your little friend?”
“Yeah! And tomorrow, she says she’ll introduce me to her other friends too!”
“My, how wonderful for you,” Chrysalis said while still petting Venom, who was enjoying the affection from her mother. “How special you are to have so many friends at such a young age. You’ve made your mother very proud.”
Venom didn’t say anything in response again. She just hummed happily while her mother brushed back her hair. She’d never been so kind and gentle to her before, but getting this attention from her was exactly what she’d hoped for when she snuck off to Canterlot. Chrysalis doted on her a little while longer before setting her back down.
“Alright, your mother has other business to attend to. Run along and play,” Chrysalis said, sending the little changeling out with a smile. Venom giggled as she trotted out, the joyful sound bouncing about until the doors shut behind her. Chrysalis’s dour expression fell across her face again as she turned to the guard beside her. “I want that one moved into her own room with a guard posted outside for protection. She is to be secretly monitored whenever she leaves the Hive, and I want reports of any interesting developments.”
“It will be done, your majesty.”
“Oh, do we know how many of my daughters are named Venom?”
“There are seven others according to the last count, your majesty.”
“Well, I would like their names changed.” Chrysalis reclined on a hoof and stared at the doors to her chamber. “And there is no need to keep the weak complainers. Who is next?”
“Ha! Read ‘em and weep!” Rainbow Dash tosses four positive pregnancy tests onto her sleeping husband, who didn’t so much as twitch in acknowledgement. He just slept among the little pink sticks, sawing many a log without so much of an inkling of his wife celebrating all around him. “One in the oven! Yeeeeeah!”
Thunderhead rolled over and continued to sleep. In lieu of waking him up, Rainbow Dash simply exited the room and left him to sleep among the excessive proof positive of their successful marital activities. She descended into the den and swept Tank up into her hooves.
“Good news, buddy! We’re adding another little pony to the family!” Rainbow Dash said, spinning the tortoise around. His reaction was only slightly more animated than Thunderheads, but Rainbow Dash didn’t waste much time on the reptile. She set him down on the couch on her way out the door, making sure to lock up behind herself without losing a second. She already knew where she was going first, and on excited wings it didn’t take her long to get there. In less than a minute, she was already knocking on Fluttershy’s door.
“Anypony hoooome?” Rainbow Dash already knew the answer, but her giddiness made her all the more impatient. She bounced up and down in front of the door until a wide-eyed Fluttershy opened it up. She had Willow in her carrier strapped to her bosom, who smiling swung her hooves and cooed absently.
“Rainbow Dash? I was just about to go see you,” Fluttershy said, coming outside and closing the door behind herself. “You won’t believe what I just found out!”
“You’re pregnant.”
“… Okay, maybe you will believe it.” Fluttershy blinked twice before the full absurdity of her friend knowing that sank in. “W-wait, how did you-”
“I’m pregnant too!” Rainbow Dash said, putting a hoof around Fluttershy’s shoulder in order to give her a tight embrace her without crushing Willow.
“That doesn’t explain how you kne-” Fluttershy had to stop once again and realize she was once again forgetting the far more important aspect of what Rainbow Dash had said. “Oh my! Congratulations!”
“Thanks! You too!” Rainbow Dash backed off and spread her wings. “So, who are we gonna go tell next?”
“Well, I was going to tell you first, but I guess that’s done already,” Fluttershy said, looking up at the clouds to think a little. She gently bounced Willow up and down, making the little filly gurgle happily. “I probably shouldn’t tell Timey until he comes home or he won’t be able to focus on his work. I guess you already told Thunderhead…”
“I did the best I could.”
“Did you tell Taboo yet?” Fluttershy asked.
“She’s got a playdate with the Cakes and Venom. She said they’re going to play around in the apple orchard.”
“Well, basically everypony lives between here and Sweet Apple Acres,” Fluttershy said. “We can make our way there and tell anypony we see on the way. Oh, but we should stop by Rarity’s first. Once she knows, everypony will find out sooner or later.”
“That sounds like a plan.” Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy went on their way, making their first destination Carousel Boutique. They had a little ways to walk, but there was no shortage of things to discuss on the way there. “This is gonna be awesome! Me and you, pushin’ out kids together. I’ll be looking to you for some pointers!”
“Oh, it’s not like I’m an expert or anything,” Fluttershy said with a little blush. “It’s only my second time…”
“Yeah, but that’s one more time than I’ve done it,” Rainbow Dash replied. “I gotta be convincing enough that Taboo believes that I’ve done this once before.”
“You’ll probably fool us all.” Fluttershy giggled to herself. Having been down this road once before, she could already imagine how Rainbow Dash was going to cope with the “fun” parts of pregnancy. “Just act like you normally do.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing, nothing.” Fluttershy gave Willow a little pat on the head, but the little filly was already getting tuckered out for an early morning nap. “So, Venom seems to come around pretty often now. I assume this means you’re okay with her and Taboo being friends?”
“Considering how few friends her own age she has, I figure any friend is a good friend at this point,” Rainbow Dash said, even if she said so reluctantly. The tiny changeling had grown on her a bit, but there was one character that still didn’t sit well with her. “I just wish that darn vulture didn’t follow her everywhere.”
“Aww, but Buzzword is such a sweetie,” Fluttershy said in defense of the gargantuan buzzard. “The way he’s always looking out for her, and scaring off ponies she doesn’t know, and expelling highly corrosive stomach acid onto her enemies.”
“I guess that bird does keep her from blowing her cover every time she comes by.” Rainbow Dash was forced to admit that even Buzzword had his good side. There was one other thing she had to admit, but it was concerning the young changeling. “Who knows, maybe a changeling will actually be just the kind of friend she needs further down the road. It isn’t conventional, but…”
“Your family isn’t one for convention.”
“Besides, they have a good time together. It’s nice to know Taboo isn’t spending all her time just by herself or with one of us. With Venom, she gets some companionship and some fresh air.” Rainbow Dash smiled deviously. “Kind of reminds me of two different little fillies.” Fluttershy pursed her lips and looked away from Rainbow Dash, pretending she wasn’t listening.
“Oh look, Carousel Boutique,” Fluttershy said in order to change the subject; however, she suddenly got a lot more than she bargained for when Pokey Pierce literally flew out of the door and landed right on his face in the street. A few other objects flew after him, objects he rose to try and dodge. The thrower of these objects soon appeared in the doorway, and she began throwing verbal abuse at him as well.
“You bumbling idiot! This is all your fault!” Rarity said, hocking a mannequin head at her husband’s head with her magic. Pierce dodged it, but the assault was far from over. “Get out! Get out and don’t come back! I never want to see your stupid face again! Do you hear me?!”
“Yes, babe, I hear you,” Pierce said, with a seemingly inappropriate smile on his face. He looked far too happy considering what was going on. Rarity threw a chair at him and then slammed the door to the Boutique shut. He stood there with the same silly grin on his face just staring at the door, but it didn’t take him long to notice the two ponies who had just stood by to watch the whole display. “Oh, hey you two!”
“Don’t ‘hey’ us!” Rainbow Dash said, darting right up to Pierce. “What the heck did you do to Rarity? If you hurt her, I swear I’m gonna-”
“Dash, not in front of Willow.” Fluttershy looked down and noticed her child was asleep. “Oh… well, I guess you can make whatever threat you want as long as you do it quietly.”
“Trust me, you’ve both got the wrong impression,” Pierce said, chuckling for some reason neither mare could figure out. “She’s probably gone back to her dreamy state again, I guarantee it. She’s going to want to talk to both of you. Look, I’m gonna go let my folks and the in-laws know the news. See ya, ladies!” Just like that, Pokey Pierce began to trot merrily down the street away from the Boutique. All Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy could do was look at one another in confusion; however, they didn’t ignore Pierce’s invitation to talk to Rarity for themselves.
“What do you think he meant ‘back to her dreamy state?’ I swear I’m going to lay him out flat the next time I see him,” Rainbow Dash said, leading the way up to the Boutique’s door. Fluttershy followed behind quietly, not wanting to wake Willow and not really having any objections to the plan. Rainbow Dash opened the door to the Boutique up, finding that the inside was oddly serene. The only sound was a quiet, gentle humming from one side of the lobby.
Both mares poked their heads in, noting the awesome carnage that Rarity had no doubt kicked up around the store in her fury. In the middle of the disarray was Rarity, but she looked neither like she was in the same fit of rage as just a few minutes ago or bawling like a pathetic sad-sack as she was want to do in periods of extreme stress. Instead, she was smiling whilst thoughtfully knitting something. She looked up momentarily to see her friends staring at her from the doorway.
“Oh, hello girls,” Rarity said as if it was any other Tuesday. “Sorry about the mess.”
“Are you okay?” Fluttershy dared to ask, uncertain if Rarity was about to go off on another rampage at the slightest notice.
“Oh, me? Ah… ha ha, yes. I’m fine… fantastic, even.” Rarity was acting odd, and not in a way she usually did. Even she seemed unsure of how she felt, but based on her smile and the slow, steady movement of her knitting needles her state of mind really did seem like a peaceful one. “Oh girls, I’ve got some terribly wonderful news: I’m pregnant.”
“You too?” Rainbow Dash couldn’t believe it. “Wait, seriously? You?”
“Have been for over a month, it seems,” Rarity said, looking down at her stomach. “Oops.”
“That explains everything,” Fluttershy said, taking a closer look at the tiny booties that Rarity appeared to be knitting. “And you’re feeling okay?”
“It’s a bit scary, but exciting too,” Rarity confessed. “Well, I guess I don’t have to explain it to you, darling. You’ve already been there once. It’s a bit selfish of me, but I kind of wish you would get pregnant again so I wouldn’t have to do this alone…”
“Oh Rarity, you’re not alone,” Fluttershy said, joining Rarity in the middle of the floor along with Rainbow Dash.
“Yes, I know I’ve got Pierce too, but he’s even more clueless than me.”
“No, she means-” Rainbow Dash was cut off by Rarity before she could finish.
“I know you’ll be there for me anyway. Don’t worry, I wouldn’t expect you two to do something so drastic just for my sake.”
“But that’s why we’re here,” Fluttershy said, finally getting her chance to fully explain. “Rainbow Dash and I are pregnant. We just found out today.”
“… Oh, well that changes things entirely,” Rarity said before clearing her throat. “We simply all must spend more time together, so that I look a little less like a whale.”
“There’s the Rarity we know and love,” Rainbow Dash said, patting Rarity on the back. “Congrats on the kid. Just think of all the fun the three of us will have when we’ve all got kids the same age! My son is gonna be the little ladies’ man with all the filly friends he’ll have!”
“So sure it’s a colt?” Rarity asked.
“And so sure ours are fillies?” Fluttershy said, looking down at Willow. “Well… I suppose I wouldn’t mind another girl.”
“Of course you two are having girls,” Rainbow Dash said, putting her hooves around both ponies. “You’re too girly not to!”
“That’s not how genetics work, darling,” Rarity told her. The reminder didn’t do anything to deflate Rainbow Dash’s ego, not that Rarity really expected it to. “Buuut… I suppose having a little lady would be fun. Oh, I do hope she’s a tomboy!”
“Really?”
“Oh my.” Fluttershy looked over at Rainbow Dash, both ponies confused at Rarity’s sentiment. Neither party was absolutely sure they even heard her right. “A tomboy?”
“Yes, a little tough filly that I can put into adorable little outfits and then she’ll make a cute little pouty expression because she’d rather go play in the mud or wrestle or something! Oh, it’s so adorable I can hardly stand it!” Rarity said, getting up on her hooves. “Yes, maybe Rainbow Dash is right! My little filly… goodness, I’d better start thinking up some names… and I need to tell my parents!”
“We were gonna make the rounds around town to deliver the news,” Rainbow Dash said. “You want to join us?”
“This place is huuuuge!” Pumpkin exclaimed for the billionth-ish time. “How do they get so many apples off the trees?”
“The Apples work hard to get the job done,” Scootaloo said, leading a procession of four ponies through the orchard’s hills. “A little hard work goes a long way kiddos, remember that.”
“Yes ma’am,” Pound said, but none of the fillies were listening.
“This place is even bigger than the Hive,” Venom said, looking up at the young fruits dangling from the tree branches. She cocked her head, still unclear on many things. “There are this many trees, but you say it’s not a forest. Why are there so many trees? I don’t get it.”
“I told you: it’s for food. You know? To eat?” Scootaloo still wasn’t completely used to the idea of looking after the little changeling, but overall Venom had been completely harmless. She had a lot of questions about rather obvious things, but other than that she came off as a normal filly. Scootaloo herself wasn’t exactly sure why Venom hadn’t disguised herself, but at the same time she didn’t pretend to know everything about changelings.
“You eat the trees?”
“No, we eat the apples,” Taboo said, providing some clarification. “They’re really good.”
“And you can bake them into all kinds of pastries!” Pumpkin said. “Like apple pie, apple fritters, apple crisp, apple turnovers, apple tarts!”
“Okay.” Venom continued staring up at the trees. “What’s a pastry?”
“You really aren’t from around here,” Pound said, turning around to take another look at Venom. He had tried not to stare before out of fear, but he was starting to find her more confusing than scary. “Don’t they have a bakery near that Hive place you live?”
“No, it’s a wasteland!” Venom said with a little smile, not that anypony understood exactly what she was so happy about. “There’s no bakery there… I think. What does a bakery look like? Can you live in it?”
“Yeah, me and Pound live in a bakery!” Pumpkin said, putting a hoof around Venom and pointing to the sky as if to paint a picture. “There’s lots of cake and pie and cookies and chocolate and candy and sugar and-”
“Do all ponies live in bakeries?” Venom asked.
“No, not all of them.”
“… But most of them?”
“I don’t live in a bakery,” Taboo said, adding her two bits to the odd conversation. “You’ve been to my house, Venom. It’s different from a bakery.”
“Is that because it’s in the sky?” Venom was starting to piece everything together, although the picture she was getting wasn’t entirely factual. “So the wingless ponies live on the ground in bakeries.”
“Well, I live in the bakery too,” Pound said in order to reiterate.
“And that is another thing I don’t understand,” Venom said, furrowing her brow in thought. “If you and Pumpkin are siblings, why is it that you have wings and she has a horn?”
“We’re just different,” Pumpkin said with a shrug. “Our parents don’t have horns or wings. That’s just how it goes sometimes! Everypony in the family is different.”
“And you only have one sibling?” Venom asked, still very perplexed. “And it’s a boy and not a girl?”
“What’s wrong with that?” Pound asked before he realized he was hopelessly outnumbered in terms of boy to girl ratio right now.
“Yeah, silly, we’re twins!” Pumpkin didn’t realize her statement would go right over Venom’s head, who only replied by tilting her head to the side. “We were born at the same time!”
“Isn’t that how it’s usually done?” Venom’s question brought a very pregnant pause in the conversation.
“Hey, Venom.” Scootaloo felt a lot more interested in the conversation all of a sudden. “Do you have any brothers or sisters?”
“I don’t have any brothers,” Venom said. “But I do have sisters.”
“Older sisters?”
“Older sisters?” Venom asked the question right back to Scootaloo. “I don’t know. We are all ‘twins.’”
“You have twin sisters?” Scootaloo understood the implication of the use of the plural here. “Exactly how many sisters do you have?”
“Mother said there are two hundred of us.”
“You have two hundred sisters?!” Pound shouted, utterly astounded by the mere thought of such agony. He had enough trouble with just one twin sister, but he couldn’t imagine how annoying two hundred Pumpkins would be.
“That’s a lot of changelings,” Scootaloo said with wide eyes. “Two hundred?”
“Aww, that’s no fair,” Taboo said. She kicked a little stone out of her way. “I don’t even have one sister. Mommy says she’s going to get me a brother.”
“It’s not a big deal,” Venom said with a dismissive shrug. “But what is your brother going to be like?”
“What is he going to be like?” Taboo was the one who tilted her head this time. After a few seconds of thought, she quickly smiled again. “He’s going to be like me!”
“Like you?!” Every hair on Scootaloo’s body shot up on end. She stopped dead in her tracks, causing Pound to run right into her back leg. This caused a chain reaction until all the young ponies were seated on their behinds. Scootaloo spun around, not doing a very good job at looking unconcerned. “Like how?”
“You know,” Taboo said, her tone becoming rather meek. She dropped her head and looked off to the side. “… A pegasus.”
“… Oh, right, a pegasus!” Scootaloo, despite her nervous sweat, did her best to play off her sudden panic attack. “How silly of me! I should’ve realized! Stupid Scootaloo, you should’ve known that!” Her self-scolding was only partially in jest. Scootaloo realized she’d nearly caused an uproar over nothing, which she vowed not to do in the future.
“Okay, a pegasus,” Venom said. She crossed her forelegs and nodded sagely. “So which kind is the pegasus?”
“Pegasi have wings,” Taboo explained very briefly.
“And no horn?”
“No horn,” Taboo said. “A pony with wings and a horn is an alicorn like Princess Twilight or Nimbus. You remember Nimbus, right?”
“So a pegasus has only wings,” Venom said, nodding to herself again. She looked up, straight at Taboo. She looked at the filly’s wings, folded gently at her sides. Venom turned around and looked at Pound. She stared at his wings, tufted with tan feathers. She ruminated a while longer, but the expression on her face said something wasn’t adding up. “Wait… I’m confused…”
“Ah, what’s there to be confused about?” Scootaloo asked, not wanting to continue this vein of conversation any longer than she needed to. “Unicorns have horns, pegasi have wings, alicorns have both and earth ponies have neither. That’s it!”
“But that doesn’t explain-”
“It explains everything,” Scootaloo said before Venom could get another word out. “Hey, who wants to see the clubhouse? Wouldn’t that be distracti-err, fun? Fun! Would that not be fun?”
“That would be fun,” Pumpkin said. Scootaloo was glad she could rely on the little unicorn to be up for anything she suggested.
“Sure,” Taboo said, willing to play along. “But what’s confusing you, Venom?”
“It’s just tha-” Once again, Venom was not allowed to finish.
“Hey look, apple trees!” Scootaloo was running out of material. She laughed nervously, which drew questioning stares from three of the four young ponies. Pumpkin looked over at the tree, just as gung-ho about this tangent as the last.
“… Just that I think there’s a category missing,” Venom said, finally completing her thought. Scootaloo could do nothing to stop it now. Taboo looked ready and willing to listen and contemplate whatever question Venom was about to ask. She wanted to cover her ears and block it out, but she found she was already doing so. She cringed and waited for the bombshell to drop. “Because if those are the only categories, that would mean that…”
“Here it comes!”
“I’m an alicorn.”
“… Huh?” Scootaloo hadn’t done a very good job of covering her ears as she heard the entirety of what Venom said with wonderful clarity. Taboo and the others had heard it too, and from the looks on their faces they found her argument very compelling. “You’re not an alicorn.”
“I know that,” Venom said, clarifying her question. “I’m a changeling. What makes me a changeling and not an alicorn, since I have a horn and wings?”
“I mean, well, it’s gotta be the… umm.” Scootaloo didn’t know how to answer. She probably hadn’t been paying attention the day in school they covered this subject.
“Is it the holes?” Pumpkin asked, pointing to the holes in Venom’s hooves. “Nopony else has holes.”
“That’s true,” Pound said, looking at the holes for himself. “Do all your sisters have holes?”
“Yeah, and so does my mom and all the guards,” Venom replied, finally figuring it all out for herself. “So it’s the holes!”
“It’s gotta be.” Pumpkin and Pound were both sure in their assertion, and the answer appeared to satisfy Venom as well. Scootaloo, for her part, just heaved a sigh of relief.
“Well, I’m glad we settled that.” Scootaloo lead the group onwards again.
“It’s a small difference, but it’s important,” Venom said, sticking her nose in the air as she followed behind the group. “Otherwise, ponies wouldn’t know I was a changeling!”
“Yeah, right.” Scootaloo snickered to herself, but she didn’t dare let Venom or the others see it. “C’mon, I’ll show you all the clubhouse.”
Scootaloo marched deeper into the orchard, with Pound following right at her heels. Pumpkin skipped along in a close second with Venom bringing up the rear. The group only got a few feet in this fashion before Venom stopped and turned around, having noticed that one pony was missing. Taboo was right where they left her, eyes fixed on something behind her.
“Are you coming?” Venom called to her friend, getting the filly’s attention. Taboo perked up and trotted to catch back up. The two rejoined the line promptly, walking briskly as if the delay hadn’t happened; however, the last pony in line was never quite in step with the others.
“Weeeeee’re baaaack!” Pinkie Pie said, bursting into the bakery with Pound and Pumpkin in tow. The Cakes were hard at work behind the counter, but Mrs. Cake managed to tear herself away from icing the cupcakes long enough to greet her children and live-in assistant.
“Welcome back. Did you have fun at Sweet Apple Acres?” she asked. As per usual, the Cakes were not fully aware of the whole story. Both Mrs. Cake and her husband were under the impression Pinkie had taken the twins to see Applejack, Roseluck, and Applerose for a little visit to the orchard. In reality, the twins had met up with Taboo and Pinkie Pie had taken Gummy out hunting for truffles. Sadly, only the former experience had any luck. All Pinkie and Gummy managed to find were a bunch of rare edible mushrooms.
“Yeah, it was a lot of fun!” Pumpkin said, bouncing up and down in place. “We even made a new friend!”
“Really? What’s your new friend like?” Mrs. Cake asked.
“She’s holey.” Pound was not one for embellishing the story or beating around the bush, which Mrs. Cake new and further served to confuse her. Mr. Cake had heard their son’s declaration as well, and the couple exchanged a confused glance.
“She’s… holy?”
“Maybe the holiest!” Pumpkin only added to the confusion. Of course, both twins were intent on honoring the promise they made to Venom before they left to not reveal her identity. She had stressed it was important for a spy to keep their real name a secret. Even though Pound had his doubts and Pumpkin didn’t really understand, they agreed to it since even the adults like Pinkie and Applejack had said to do so as well.
It was strange for the twins, having to keep so many secrets. It is generally difficult to get such young ponies to keep so many things under wraps, especially when the party they were keeping in the dark was their own parents. Pumpkin and Pound loved their parents no doubt, and they certainly wouldn’t want to hurt them by keeping secrets; however, the true mastermind behind the secrecy was far too clever for that to stop her.
“C’mon you two, let’s go upstairs,” Pinkie said, sweeping up the twins and putting them onto her back. They were almost too big for that anymore, but Pinkie wasn’t thinking about that. “It looks like these two don’t have a clue!” Pinkie giggled innocently, with the twins following right in suite. The mare had successfully turned keeping secrets into a game, and a very enjoyable one at that. The danger, the intrigue, and the knowing did make it thrilling for the twins.
As the others went upstairs, Mr. and Mrs. Cake were merely left to shrug their shoulders. They were all too willing to write events off as Pinkie Pie just being Pinkie Pie and that she was unfortunately rubbing off on the twins. They always talked about how they hoped they would inherit her optimism and unflappable spirit, but they drew the line at her unstoppable tendency for wacky shenanigans.
“I wonder who they met,” Mrs. Cake said, returning to her cupcakes.
“It beats me,” Mr. Cake replied as he took a piping hot carrot cake out of the oven. He set it on the rack to cool and then faced his wife. “Some kind of saint, it sounds like.”
“Saints are fine by me,” Mrs. Cake said. “So long as they aren’t spending time with that strange filly again.”
“I guess so. Anypony is better than her.”
In the Cake household there was an unspoken divide between the young and the old. In the middle, there was a Pie. As long as she was there to manage things, both sides could remain in their camps until the right time to reveal all arrived.
“Just remember to stay close, alright?” Rainbow Dash said to Taboo, residing quietly upon her back as they flew. “This shouldn’t take too long, but there might be a lot of ponies we don’t know there. I don’t want you running off, alright?”
“Okay.” Taboo got basically same speech everytime she went out with mommy. She always listened and obeyed, without complaint. She didn’t really want to wander out among the ponies she didn’t know anyway.
“And afterwards we’ll go to grandma and grandpa’s.” Rainbow Dash hadn’t initially wanted to take Taboo to Cloudsdale today, but things hadn’t worked out in her favor; however, she couldn’t risk missing today of all days. Spring Training for the newest group of Wonderbolts had just finished with the induction of the newest members, which meant registration for the next round of Spring Training started today.
Spring Training was the real deal for Wonderbolt hopefuls. The Wonderbolt Academy was a requirement for even qualifying for Spring Training, but it was far from the only one. Past records and correspondence played a huge role in eligibility, and in reality the Wonderbolts should already have an advance list of ponies they’d even consider considering for registration prepared at this point. Rainbow Dash’s eagerness to register early was not due to any doubts on her part that she might not qualify for entry, but she did have a certain growing concern.
To register a pony must show up in the feather and flesh at Wonderbolt HQ, which is high up in Cloudsdale. With one extra passenger, Rainbow Dash’s window of opportunity for being able to make the flight to Cloudsdale was set to close in the future. Registration isn’t open every day during the summer or fall due to the Wonderbolt’s touring schedule being in full swing during those months. Time for registering would be over and done once winter began, but Rainbow Dash figured she would definitely not be able to fly at that point anyway.
The other concern was the recruitment cap set on Spring Training. The cap differs year to year based on how many ponies got recruited last year, how many shows they expect to book next year, and a few other variable metrics such as injury and illness. Going on the first day as early as possible was an absolute must for Rainbow Dash because the Wonderbolts did not believe in reserving seats on the team. They just figured that the most dedicated would find a way to make it work, rain or shine or lack of babysitter in Dash’s case.
It was early enough in the morning that Thunderhead working early had also affected her plans. Without anypony to ask right at the last minute, Rainbow Dash decided just to take Taboo along for the ride since it would present a nice opportunity to visit the grandparents anyway.
Wonderbolts HQ came into view, seated atop a high plateau on the edge of Cloudsdale. There was a rumor that they had built it far away from Cloudsdale Stadium so that they could include flying back and forth from HQ to their practice grounds as part of their warm-up when practicing for performances. While the stadium served as the mock stage, the grounds of the HQ held every last bit of equipment needed to train an effective flying force. The building itself was somewhat modest, since what the Wonderbolts really needed was the wide open space.
“Doesn’t look like anypony else is around,” Rainbow Dash said, noting the empty skies all around. She landed right next to the front door, the only sound her own hooves touching down on the stones. “Maybe we’re the first ones here!”
Rainbow Dash had, unfortunately, gotten her hopes up too soon. As soon as she opened the door, she was met with the backside of a pony standing in what appeared to be a very long line. She craned her neck to see the front, which did indeed lead all the way up to the front desk. Beyond that, there were other ponies sitting around in the lobby staring up at the clock.
“… I guess the extra weight slowed me down,” Rainbow Dash said, looking down at the just barely visible bump developing on her stomach. In reality she knew here hemming and hawing over whether or not to take Taboo was what made her late,and Taboo had to go pee right before they left. Rainbow Dash let Taboo jump off her back and stand close to her. She absently put one wing down over the filly, further protecting her from prying eyes. Luckily, most everypony else was engrossed in their own little world. “Well… this should be fine.”
“Are you kidding me?!” Cloudchaser stomped her hooves and grunted from right behind Rainbow Dash. “I even got up super early to get in! Uuuugh, this is so stupid!”
Taboo got a little closer to Rainbow Dash. She wasn’t particularly fond of Cloudchaser, but then again neither was Rainbow Dash. Both of them scooted a little closer to the stallion in front of them, away from the dismal Cloudchaser.
“Hey, I saw that.” Cloudchaser caught them in the act. “Don’t think you can ignore me.”
“Oh, hey Cloudchaser! I didn’t see you there,” Rainbow Dash said, not even trying to hide the fact that she was lying. “I suppose you’re here to register?”
“No, I’m here to see Soarin’.”
“Ha, yeah, good one.” Rainbow Dash was surprised Cloudchaser had a sense of humor about her obsession with the uniform.
“I wasn’t joking.”
Rainbow Dash was now much less surprised. “You do know that he has a special somepony… right?”
“…”
“Are… are you crying?” Rainbow Dash almost felt bad for Cloudchaser, who was managing to keep a straight face as tears streamed down from the corners of her eyes.
“Big girls don’t cry, Dash… big girls don’t cry.” Cloudchaser kept not crying for a few minutes while the line moved slowly forward, a period which Rainbow Dash was blessed with silence. The peace wasn’t meant to last though as Cloudchaser wasn’t one to just stand around waiting. “So, what’s new with you?”
“Oh… you know… pregnant.”
“What the what?” Cloudchaser got super bug-eyed. She started at Rainbow Dash’s stomach, not that she really knew what to look for. “Seriously? Out of wedlock?”
“I’m married.”
“You got married?!” Cloudchaser was shouting now, attracting no less than just a little attention. “To who? When did you get a boyfriend?”
“Thunderhead, the stallion who was guarding me at night.” Rainbow Dash blinked at the mare a couple of times. “Cloudchaser, you were at the wedding!”
“… Was I?” Cloudchaser got real quiet for a second. Rainbow Dash had never seen the mare focus so intensely. “Huh, I guess so. I think I remember the reception was fun.”
“Thanks?” Rainbow Dash secretly hoped that she would get the very last spot for Spring Training just so there wouldn’t be one left for Cloudchaser. It was a mean sentiment, but Rainbow Dash really didn’t want this mare to be a potential coworker.
“So, one on the way and you’re trying out for the Wonderbolts.” Cloudchaser ran a hoof through her mane and looked off to the side. “I just hope being that ambitious helps more than it hurts.”
Rainbow Dash especially wasn’t fond of how she could sometimes say something kind of smart. The only thing she could do was continue to wait as the line moved forward with mechanical predictability. Ponies left the line, the lobby, and the building at a regular clip. Eventually, Rainbow Dash had her turn at the front desk which began her stint of waiting in a chair. Taboo sat silent next to her in a chair right in the corner of the lobby. Even with Cloudchaser’s outbursts, they’d managed to keep a low profile. Nopony paid them much mind, especially once they were out of the way. Rainbow Dash was still worried, having seen what she thought might be a few concerned looks in their direction.
“Is it gonna be much longer?” Taboo asked, speaking up for the first time since they arrived.
“I should be next,” Rainbow Dash said. “We can leave after the interview.”
“Rainbow Dash?” A secretary popped in from the back and looked around.
“See, what did I say?” Rainbow Dash stood up and headed over, with Taboo following close behind. “I’m here.”
“It’s time for your interview,” the mare said, gesturing for her to follow her into the back. Rainbow Dash complied, but the secretary stopped leading her for a moment. She looked down, but didn’t say anything for a few seconds. “… Um… only you, ma’am, are allowed back here.”
“Really?” Rainbow Dash looked down at Taboo, who was already looking up at her. Neither party wanted to leave the company of the other. “But, she’s my daughter and we came here alone.”
“Those are the rules.” The secretary snapped at them. Rainbow Dash figured she’d best comply, as much as she absolutely did not want to. She looked back at the waiting room. There were only a few ponies left, since only a few showed up after Cloudchaser. Rainbow Dash thought of asking her to look after Taboo, but chances were that Cloudchaser would be called next. Besides, she didn’t really trust the mare anyway. Rainbow Dash got down at Taboo’s level and managed a smile.
“Just go wait in the corner for me to come out, okay? I won’t be more than five minutes.”
“… Promise?”
“Don’t even sweat it,” Rainbow Dash said, standing back up. “Now go. I’ll be right back.” She followed the secretary into the back while Taboo watched the door close. Slowly, she turned around and walked back to her seat. As she went along, she made the mistake of looking over to where some other ponies were sitting.
They were all watching her. Even when she looked away, she could feel them watching her. She walked faster and got into her seat as fast as she could, but even in the corner they could all see her. Even if they were only looking out of the corner of their eyes, she knew they were watching. She recoiled, dropping her head and pinning her ears back. She didn’t like being alone like this. She wished five minutes could be over already, but it hadn’t even been one yet.
Her ears twitched. Even with them pinned back, she could hear the ponies whispering to each other. She didn’t listen to what they were saying; she didn’t want to. Taboo remained as still as possible, too afraid to do anything else. The room felt like it was getting smaller, and time felt like it was getting longer. Taboo closed her eyes, but she couldn’t help but hear it all going on around her.
She heard somepony get out of their chair, instantly prompting her to open her eyes back up. There was a stallion walking towards her, a stallion she did not recognize. She clamped her eyes shut and recoiled as far back into her chair as possible. Time became agonizingly slow. She was powerless to do anything but listen as the stallion got closer and closer. Once he was right next to her, he stopped and stood there. As suddenly as he had gotten up, he sat back down in the seat right next to her.
Taboo popped one eye open. Whoever the stallion was sitting next to her, he didn’t spare her a glance as he sat between her and the rest of the room. He looked straight ahead, nearly unblinking. He still looked very angry, so his presence did nothing to allay Taboo’s fears; however, she continued to stare at him while he refused to look at her. Bit by bit, the background whispers seemed to fade away. Before Taboo knew it, the door to the back opened up again.
“Taboo!” Rainbow Dash practically came flying out, skidding to a halt before her daughter and the stallion seated next to her. She stopped and stared at him for a moment. “Thunderlane? What’re… what’re you doing?”
“Keeping the peace,” he said, standing back up.
“How noble of you,” Rainbow Dash said, deadpanning her eyes at him.
“I wouldn’t recommend bringing her back here,” Thunderlane said, looking down at Taboo for just a moment. Taboo retreated to the safety of her mother’s side, taking refuge beneath her wing. Thunderlane was far too intense for her, and she didn’t at all want to come back to this place. “I thought you were gonna play it smarter than that.”
“I couldn’t help it,” she said, heading towards the door with Taboo. Thunderlane followed right behind them, still eclipsing everypony else’s view of Taboo. “You’re being especially jumpy.”
“Because this reflects on all of us from Ponyville.” Thunderlane calmed down a bit, reminding himself that getting angry at the two of them wasn’t going to make things better. He went as far as the front door, but stopped there while Rainbow Dash and Taboo continued on. “I’m just trying to help.”
“Thanks for that,” Rainbow Dash said, turning to give Thunderlane one last piece of advice. “But our family can handle its own affairs.” She lifted Taboo onto her back and took off, leaving Thunderlane in the dust. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust him now, but rather she was upset she had to trust him at all. This trip had turned into a debacle, and his intercession had only punctuated that. Rainbow Dash didn’t bother pondering what might’ve happened if he hadn’t stepped in.
“He was scary…”
“Hmm, who, Thunderlane?” Rainbow Dash asked. She looked up at her passenger long enough to see her nod. “Don’t worry, he’s not scary. He just acts tough.”
“But that’s scary.” Taboo had a point. He hadn’t said a word to her when he tried to help her. He hadn’t even smiled at her, let alone looked at her. It was almost like he hadn’t wanted to acknowledge she was even there. Something about that made her gut twist into a knot. “Are we going to go to grandma and grandpa’s now?”
“We’re going straight there,” Rainbow Dash told her. “Everything is fine now, so just relax.”
For some reason, neither party felt like relaxing.
“Eeyup.”
“Mmhmm.”
“Yeah.”
“Jeez, the days have gotten long.” Thunderhead took a good gulp of his coffee. The other three stallions were drinking cider, but seeing as he just woke up and had to get to work in an hour drinking alcohol was wildly inappropriate. Despite their fourth member’s different choice of beverage, the four of them standing outside together drinking still felt right to the other three. It was if their group was whole.
“Isn’t that good news for you?” Pierce asked, drinking from his flagon. “Short nights mean short work for you, right?”
“It doesn’t work that way,” Thunderhead told them. “I still have to work the same hours. It’s just now the sun is up during the first hour, which hasn’t stopped being weird.”
“I can’t even wrap my head around being nocturnal,” Turner said. “I have a hard enough time just waking up at night if Willow starts crying. Thankfully she sleeps pretty well at night.”
“Yeah, lucky you,” Pierce said. “Poor Macintosh here can’t go one night without Applerose waking him and his wife up.”
“Eeyup.”
“I bet your second child makes up for the first one,” Pierce said, wishing a little mayhem on his friend’s head. His life was so peaceful that he needed something to shake things up, Pierce figured. “I get the feeling my kid is gonna be a hoofful too.”
“So says you two,” Thunderhead said. “I’m actually kind of scared to think how nuts our kid is gonna be. If she’s related to Dash, I get the feeling raising her won’t be easy.”
“Eeyup.”
“Hey, how do you think I feel?” Pierce asked, finishing off his drink. “Rarity takes a lot of maintenance, so having a tiny version of her won’t be any easier.”
“It won’t be easier period.” Turner smiled to himself and swirled his drink. “But don’t worry because I’ll be glad to give you all the advice you want on being a father.”
“Please, I bet Fluttershy does, like, eighty percent of the work,” Pierce said as he gazed into his empty cup. “No offense man, but taking care of tiny things is kind of her M.O.”
“He’s got a point.”
“Eeyup.”
“Hey, I’m not some slouch!” Turner took a deep drink, only to have some go down the wrong pipe. Once he was finished choking, he finished his defense. “I’ve been planning our children’s futures; I’m the big picture parent.”
“But can you change a diaper?” Pierce’s question went unanswered by Turner, who opted to stare up at the orange sky. “I totally can. Rarity has me practice on a watermelon. I’m already committed to putting in time on the little things, so I don’t think I need any advice from you.”
“You’re making it sound like I’m a bad parent,” Turner said, actually feeling a little guilty.
“I’m sure you’re fine,” Thunderhead said, comforting the poor stallion. The guy really did try, at least according to what Rainbow Dash said Fluttershy told her. “All I know is that with me and Dash’s schedules, it’s gonna be a tough adjustment.”
“You’re already taking care of Taboo, so it can’t be that much of an adjustment,” Pierce said, but Thunderhead shook his head.
“Dash’s current job is a little more friendly in that regard, but if she gets into the Wonderbolts…”
“Ah, therein lies your challenge,” Turner said. “Well, at least you all won’t get bored.”
“I don’t think we’re doing this to stave off ennui.”
“At least you’re doing it on purpose,” Pierce said, patting Thunderhead on the back.
“Yeah, no kidding.” Turner sighed and finished off his drink in one go.
“Eeyup.”
“Hey, you all drinking outside?”
Everypony looked up to see Soarin’ flying overhead. None of them had any idea what he was doing in the neighborhood, but it didn’t take terribly long to figure out what or rather who he’d be in Ponyville for. Even with that mystery solved, the four wondered what he could possibly want now.
“Not Thunderhead,” Turner said. “He has work.”
“I know that! We work together.”
“Work is a strong word for what you do.” Thunderhead finished his coffee, wishing it was actually alcoholic for a moment.
“The outside of the Boutique seems like an odd place for this,” Soarin’ said. The other stallions had no objections to the venue, especially since there was a good reason for it.
“Most of our wives are in there,” Pierce told him. “It’s a pregnancy thing.”
“Dash is trying to stay as active as she can,” Thunderhead said. “Rarity and Fluttershy are along for the ride. I suppose keeping in shape together is easier than doing it alone.”
“Fluttershy seems to be enjoying it.” Turner smiled to himself, thinking of all the times his wife had complained about being unable to be up and about the last time. This time she kept saying she was getting all her desire to move out of the way now so she didn’t regret it once she had to slow down. “It’s making the pregnancy a little easier.”
“Haha, you guys are crazy!” Soarin’ flew a loop and continued to laugh down at them. “I don’t think I could ever have kids! That’d be waaay too much responsibility and stuff. I just want it to be me and my mare and whatever we wanna do! Later!” As suddenly as he appeared, Soarin’ flew off into the darkening sky. In his wake, the remaining for stallions were left to look at each other with similar concern.
“He doesn’t want kids?” Turner said, scratching his head. “Do you… do you think he knows?”
“He has to… I mean, we know and we’re not going out with Pinkie Pie,” Thunderhead replied. “She talks about it without prompting. One time she told me and Dash that she wanted one foal for every day of the week at least.”
“Once she came into my shop and told me she wanted as many foals as there are rooms in Canterlot castle.” Turner put a hoof to his chin. “And then she bought seventy-eight alarm clocks.”
“That’s nothing,” Pierce said, getting ready for a doozy. “One time I overheard her telling Rarity she wanted more foals than possible combinations of three scoop cones down at the ice cream parlor.”
“Is that lot?” Thunderhead asked.
“Eeyup.”
“They’ve got twenty three flavors, man. I did the math. It’s over twelve thousand.”
The four stallions stood in profound silence for a few seconds.
“… He really doesn’t know.”
“He does not know.”
“Nopony told him.”
“Nnope.”
The clattering of construction filled the house, which was making Rainbow Dash just a little more than irritable. Her mother sat nearby knitting and maintaining the peace, knowing full well that her daughter was likely to snap at any moment. Her other mother, the one of the in-law variety, sat next to her reading a Daring Do book that Rainbow Dash had recently finished. Despite all the racket, the two olders mares were the very picture of serenity. The only other pony handling it as well as they were was fast asleep upstairs, but he wasn’t being counted among the living currently.
“Aaargh! Can’t they wait to do this?” Rainbow Dash was full of complaints today. Her wings felt too heavy to get out and do any kind of flying today and her aching hooves were killing her once again. She was only halfway through this pregnancy deal, but part of her want to back-up and maybe not do it. If there was anything the mare hated, it was definitely being forced to rest.
“Now Dashie, you know Taboo is going to need her own room,” her mother said. “You want Taboo all moved in there so you have room for the foal in your room, don’t you?”
“Stop talking to me like a child!” Dash flipped her pillow over and placed it over her ears. “Are they going to be done soon?”
“It shouldn’t be that much longer,” Stormy said. She glanced up from her book and looked upstairs where the noise was coming from. “Once all the pieces are in place, it should quiet down.”
“Bark bark!” Pretzel’s tongue lolled in and out of his mouth as he stood guard in front of the couch. Tank was standing nearby, acting as a second line of protection for his master.
“Just try and relax,” Palette said, setting down her knitting for a moment. “Focus on the fact that nopony is going to bother you to do anything. You’re free to just be a lump on the couch.”
A couple of particularly loud bangs resonated from upstairs.
“Can’t I be a bump somewhere quieter?” Rainbow Dash sat up and hurled her pillow the stairs. When her attack did nothing to quiet things down, she flopped back down in defeat. She would’ve given anything to just hand off the whole pregnancy thing to somepony else and go flying around right about now. She put a hoof on her stomach and grumbled. “You’d better be thankful for all of this.”
“Did you and Thunderhead decide on a name yet?” Stormy asked. “He told us that you’re positive it’s going to be a boy, so you must have a name or two in mind.”
“Yeah, I’ve got some ideas,” Rainbow Dash said, gladly taking up a different avenue of conversation. The construction sounds actually did seem to be calming down, and she would rather do anything than wallow in her own misery. “I’m thinking Ace Rider or Blitz Zephyr.”
“Of course,” Palette said, rolling her eyes. “Wonderbolts.”
“Naming him after a Wonderbolt will ensure he becomes a Wonderbolt himself one day,” Rainbow Dash said, rubbing her belly a little more. “He’s going to have big shoes to fill with such a prestigious namesake and being the son of the best Wonderbolt of all time!”
“Aww, Hardy is going to be sad that you won’t name it after him,” Stormy said with a little pout. She’d kind of wanted it to be named after him too. “Maybe we can combine the names, like Hard Rider or Blitz Knocks.”
“Birdie would want it to be named after himself too,” Palette said. Even if her husband had never explicitly said so, she knew how he thought.
“I’m not naming my kid Birdbrain,” Rainbow Dash said. “No offense, but it’s just not a very Wonderbolt-y name. Neither is Blitz Knocks… but Hard Rider…”
“See, it works!” Stormy said, clapping her hooves together. “With a name like that, I’m sure he’ll be very fast.”
“Oh, Birdie will be so disappointed.” Palette picked up her knitting again and returned to work on it with a bit of remorse. Rainbow Dash rolled her owns eyes, but after she’d done that she noticed something odd about what her mother was making.
“Is that for my kid?” she asked, pointing at the little hat that was almost half formed in Palette’s hooves.
“Of course it is. You didn’t think it was for you, did you?”
“Why’s it pink?!”
“Oh, about that.” Palette resume knitting, her face remaining passive as she worked with mechanical precision. “It might still be a girl.”
“Nope, no girl,” Rainbow Dash said. She was that sure in her convictions. “He’s in my body, so I think I’ve got a good idea of what he’s like.”
“Is that so?” Palette didn’t so much as look up from her work, which Rainbow Dash did not like one bit. She wouldn’t preferred it if she’d at least managed to ruffle her mother’s feathers just a little. “If you say so, I’ll trust you.”
“And yet you’re still making that silly hat!”
“I don’t think it’s so silly,” Stormy said, returning to her book. “There’s still a chance…”
“A girl wouldn’t be so bad,” Palette said. “Why, I’m sure Taboo would love to have a little sister. Wouldn’t you?”
Something stirred from beneath the couch. It struggled to emerge at first, but soon enough a tiny head with two pillows pinned over either ear emerged. Taboo did not at all like the sound of the construction, and thus had retreated somewhere much quieter. Even so, she still had managed to hear her grandma’s question.
“Yeah, I’d like a little sister.” Taboo managed to answer the question before another loud crash was heard upstairs, forcing her to retreat back into the recesses of the couch.
“Yeah, yeah, say whatever you want.” Rainbow Dash put both hooves on her belly, rubbing them both counterclockwise as she grinned down at it. “This little guy is gonna be a Wonderbolt, that’s for certain.”
14
"Another slice? ... Yeah, you're right. We deserve it. Not like I'm gonna get much bigger... yeah, that's the right thinking. You know how to bargain with a mare."
"Daddy, Mommy is talking to the foal again." Taboo and Thunderhead watched Rainbow Dash, who reclined on the couch with a half-empty pie tin balanced up on her swollen stomach. The mare chatted casually with her unborn progeny, a sight that wasn't so foreign in the household in recent days. After all the excitement of the evening, Thunderhead figured that his wife would be in a melancholy mood. Even he felt a bit like curling up and just giving up for a while, but he had to get to work. "Is she going to be like this forever?"
"She'll probably go back to normal once she gives birth." Thunderhead, being one half of the whole child rearing operation, was on the same page as Rainbow Dash currently. He wasn't much for baseball, but he realized they'd somehow gotten three strikes against themselves. It wasn't like there was any real competition about, but Rainbow Dash still had her pride to think about. She was supposed to be the fastest, but here she was dejectedly eating pie in defeat before even crossing the finish line. Thunderhead didn't have to think very hard about when this all started.
"Say hello to your sister, Willow."
"Hewwo, Maple." Willow smiled down at her newborn sister, who was peering up at the ponies around her with wide, blue eyes. The little earth pony only very recently named Sweet Maple couldn't respond of course seeing as she'd just gone through the most trying (and only) event of her life. She hadn't the time to master the complexities of language yet, not that her older sister understood this. "She's not saying anyting."
"You couldn't talk when you were born either, sweetheart," Fluttershy said, giggling a bit to herself. Giving birth for a second time had actually been a bit easier for her, seeing as she knew what to expect for the most part. Everything had gone predictably, right down to Time Turner passing out. "She can't understand us either."
"Then why say hewwo?"
"Because that's the nice way to greet ponies, sweetheart. If you greet your sister nicely, she will grow up to be nice like you."
"Ohkay." Willow bobbed her head to show she understood. She turned her attention to Maple. "Hewwo!"
"Yeeeah, that's about all of that I can handle," Rainbow Dash said, getting up from her seat in the corner. "I'm sure you're four times as tired as I am Flutters, but I'm bushed."
"Oh, I didn't mean to keep you up," Fluttershy said, remembering her friend. In her defense, she'd been a little preoccupied since they'd arrived at the hospital. "We're all probably going to nod off pretty soon too. Timey should wake up soon and look after things, so I'll be alright."
"Ugh, that guy." Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes at the mention of the world's most faint of heart stallion. She wandered over to Fluttershy's bedside and took another good look at Maple. "This one kind of looks like him, with the eyes and the mane."
"I know! Isn't she adorable?" Fluttershy was clearly taken with her own offspring, but that was par for the course. "Oh, are you going to be okay getting home by yourself?"
"Please, you underestimate me," Rainbow Dash said. She opened up her wings and gave them a few good beats, as if to demonstrate that she could still fly. Sadly, she was under strict instructions not to do so even though she knew she was strong enough to get airborne. She may have cheated this rule a few times, but she made sure to keep it to just a few. It pained her, but she had another life on her mind. "Besides, I'm sure Scootaloo won't let me go back by myself anyway."
"Oh, please tell her that I'm sorry about all of this," Fluttershy said. "I kind of ruined everypony's plans tonight."
"Don't even apologize. It's not like you had any say in it," Rainbow Dash said. She leaned down and got close to Maple. "Somepony was ready a bit early."
"You're not upset about that, are you?" Fluttershy asked.
"Pfft, naaw." Rainbow Dash waved it off, genuinely unconcerned about the whole thing. "If anypony should be worried it's Rarity. She's behind while I'm still right on track. I got a feeling I'm gonna knock this one out before Hearthswarming."
"But that's next week," Fluttershy said as she raised an eyebrow. "You can't possibly know that it'll happen so soon."
"But it fits in with the plan." Rainbow Dash's mention of "the plan" once again caused Fluttershy to roll her eyes. There'd been enough talk about "the plan" for the past few months to last several years. "Delivering before winter wraps up will give me plenty of time to make sure I'm still fighting fit for Spring Training."
"You could probably do a lot better than most ponies even if you were still pregnant for Spring Training." Fluttershy rocked Maple and a little and tittered at her friend. "If I were you, I'd worry about-"
"There is no reason to worry about anything." Rainbow Dash was a little too easygoing for anypony's good. She was convinced she knew exactly how everything would play out, just as usual. Despite her confidence concerning the future, a yawn still managed to break free from her mouth. "Plus, it's bedtime. No time to worry when there's sleeping to do."
"Promise me you'll take it easy on the way back," Fluttershy said.
"Ha, promise me you'll take it easy yourself and you've got yourself a deal." Rainbow Dash turned and headed towards the door. "G'night all."
"Goodnight, Rainbow Dash. Thank you again! Willow, say goodbye to Mrs. Dash."
"Buh-bai!"
Rainbow Dash let the door close behind her before letting out the second yawn she'd been holding back. She hadn't been kidding when she said she was tired, but she wasn't at all surprised. The evening had suddenly become a lot more exciting than she anticipated. All she wanted to do was spend a little time outside of the house and visit Fluttershy. Both of them had been more or less cooped up at home, so Rainbow Dash summoned Scootaloo to help her get out an about. Taboo was left with a slumbering Thunderhead and those were supposed to be the plans for just a few hours.
When Fluttershy went into labor, plans drastically changed. Scootaloo went from helping Rainbow Dash be mobile to helping Fluttershy be mobile in order to get her to the hospital. Rainbow Dash watched over her from there while Scootaloo had to fly off to get Time Turner, who showed up just in time to pass out. In the end, neither Rainbow Dash nor Scootaloo knew exactly why they needed to get him. As time dragged on, Rainbow Dash had sent Scootaloo to her house to make sure Thunderhead knew what was going on and to make sure Taboo got to bed alright. Now it was Rainbow Dash's turn to go on home. When she reached the lobby of the hospital, she was not surprised to find Scootaloo there waiting for her.
"Didn't I tell you to stay with Taboo?" Rainbow Dash asked as she approached the young mare. Scootaloo was up and standing at attention within seconds, her wings flaring straight up.
"I couldn't just let you walk home on your own!" Scootaloo said. "I figured you'd need help going back up, just like you'd need help getting down seeing as you're still pregnant and everything."
"Do you have to say 'still?' Anyway, I can get around just fine," Rainbow Dash said, trotting past Scootaloo towards the door. Scootaloo followed her like an untrained puppy eager to please its master. "Besides, are you even good enough at flying to help me up?"
"Hey, I've gotten a lot better!" Scootaloo said, her pride a bit wounded. "I've been practicing a lot lately. I've got the logistics of flying down backwards and forwards. Heck, I could probably teach you a thing or two."
"Whoooa, I don't care how good you are. You'll never be in a position to teach me anything."
"Well, I could teach somepony something. I bet I could get Taboo airborne."
"She'll fly when she's ready," Rainbow Dash said. The pair of ponies walked out of the hospital and into the night. This would normally be where Rainbow Dash would take to her wings and zoom off, but current circumstances prevented such an escape. Instead she trotted across the snow covered streets like everypony else. It didn't feel quite right to her, but then again she didn't feel quite like she usually did anyway. She was at least grateful for the company, even if she didn't dare let on about it. "Aren't your folks gonna worry about you?"
"Let 'em worry. A little excitement does them good." Scootaloo always made them worry; she was just that kind of child.
"I've worried before, Scoots, and I wouldn't call it exciting."
"That's because your life is actually exciting," Scootaloo said, her point sounding somewhat logical for just a second.
"I wouldn't say chaotic, just... eventful."
"Same difference." Scootaloo got airborne and hovered next to Rainbow Dash, which served to tick her off somewhat. Scootaloo remained in the air without struggle, a sign she'd come a long way since she'd started. It was becoming second nature to fly, as was the case with many pegasi. "So, Taboo turns four in the spring, right?"
"Right."
"So that means she'll start school next spring, right?"
"... Yeah." Rainbow Dash knew this. She had talked to Thunderhead about it not two weeks ago. She'd spoken to her parents about it. She'd spoken to the in-laws about it. If somepony was bound to listen, she had bent their ear about it. Rainbow Dash thought about simply forgetting about school altogether, but that wouldn't be doing right by Taboo. She was growing up rather quickly all of a sudden. Even if it was more than a year away, the very thought of the whole event made Rainbow Dash suddenly feel as if she was in over her head. "Why do you ask?"
"It's just because I heard something interesting," Scootaloo said. She was strangely serious, or at least she was as serious as Scootaloo could get. "I heard they're going to start building a new schoolhouse once winter is cleared away. City Hall says the town is getting bigger and needs to make sure they can accommodate the youth or some political mumbo jumbo like that. The Mayor kept going on about being on par with education in big cities."
"Where'd you hear all of this?" Rainbow Dash never knew Scootaloo to be any kind of political activist, or even remotely politically aware.
"I actually went to a City Hall meeting," Scootaloo said, further shocking Rainbow Dash. The older mare awaited the reasoning behind this sudden inclination to participate in democracy. "There were a lot of ponies there debating that, but it sounded like they'd already decided to go ahead with it a while ago. As for me, I just wanted to petition to bring some kind of Flight Camp to Ponyville. A lot of pegasi around here can't or don't make the journey up to Cloudsdale or out to anywhere else for that kind of thing. Puts kids at a disadvantage flight-wise. We need that sort of thing, ya know? We can't just pretend there aren't pegasi living here."
"That's... wow. You've really thought this through."
"I get the feeling you think I'm stupid or something."
Rainbow Dash withheld any comment she had on the subject.
"But she didn't seem so upset by that," Taboo said, recalling the events of the days directly following. Taboo herself remembered having a lot of fun with Sweet Maple and Willow over at Fluttershy's cottage. Her mommy hadn't been able to go down each time, but that was only because leaving the house was difficult for her. "She was happy that auntie Fluttershy had her foal."
"It was the beginning of the end either way," Thunderhead replied. "It made what happened next that much more frustrating for her..."
"Who's mommy's little Hearthswarming Gift? Who is? Who is?"
The itty-bitty ivory unicorn smiled up at her mother, who nearly nopony else in the room recognized due to her entirely unkempt appearance. It had been a long, long, looooong day for her, so she had a valid excuse. Even without that excuse nopony would've dared cross her currently, and it just wasn't because Soarin' had crossed her and wound up with his head lodged quite snugly between the floorboards.
"That's right, you are!" Rarity shook a little rattle above her daughter's head, which further served to please the newborn.
"Midnight on the nose, huh?" Twilight asked, still astounded by the whole thing. Pierce nodded in acknowledgement, looking a little ragged himself from being awake for quite a long while now. He hadn't given birth, but he had survived the throttling of a lifetime today. "I'm sorry we couldn't all be there for it."
"No, it's really no problem," Pierce said, a little tired of hearing these apologies. "Rarity would've hated for everyone to see her like that anyway..."
"Well, congratulations pardner!" Applejack said, giving the new father a good pat on the back. He cringed and shook violently, his bruises still tender. "Finesse is such a darlin' little thang! She's got yer mane, I reckon."
"I think she mostly takes after her mother." Pierce strained to talk through the pain. He managed to ride it out, sighing as the stinging subsided. "I feel kinda bad for hijacking the party."
"You'd better get used to it," Twilight said. "You'll have to celebrate her birthday and Hearthswarming at the same time from now on."
"Twice the presents!" Pinkie Pie shouted as she bounced past.
"Literally a second earlier and that would not be the case," Pierce said, looking over at where Rarity was still fawning over Finesse. She'd been at it ever since the little filly had popped on out. The whole family had slept through the entire morning at the hospital, but they'd managed to summon up the energy to come on down to the library for the Hearthswarming party. There was no doubt in Pierce's mind that Rarity wanted to flaunt her daughter for all her friends to see, but thus far she'd only succeeded in monopolizing her own offspring while everypony else just watched.
"I reckon I never did picture Rarity as the motherly type, but boy is she outdoing herself," Applejack said, watching the same thing as Pierce. "Well, I guess that means there's two down..."
Applejack grinned and looked over at Rainbow Dash, who had been standing with them this whole time. She was letting her displeasure show outwardly, whether or not she realized it. The mare just glowered at Rarity and flicked her tail. There was no mystery surrounding who had stepped in her cornflakes.
"Aaan' one to go."
"Shut up." Rainbow Dash was far beyond being in the mood.
"You need to lighten up," Applejack said, putting a hoof around her grumpy and very pregnant friend. "Yer kid'll be next. Stop yer belly achin' and try to enjoy the party."
"She totally stole my idea!" Rainbow Dash wasn't about to listen to reason as she launched into her tirade. "I was supposed to be showing off my kid at this party, not her! She ruined my perfectly good plan!"
"Trust me, this wasn't our idea in the least," Pierce said. "Really, it was all an accident."
"And besides, wasn't it your plan to give birth before Hearthswarming?" Twilight asked, pointing out a clear contradiction. "Maybe Finesse knew that you failed your own plan and decided to take control of the situation."
"Far-fetched, but I'd believe it," Applejack said. She gave Rainbow Dash a few nudges and smirked to herself. "Ain't you glad that Finesse had your back like that? You should be thanking her."
Rainbow Dash ground her teeth and grunted, not daring to speak ill of the newborn. She was an adorable little ball, so there was no way she could win if that was what she was going up against. All she had was her occupied gut to back her up, but everypony, herself especially, was already tired of seeing that. The novelty of pregnancy was long gone now, and what remained was burden and painful anticipation. She wanted to be done with it already and get on to the next part. Her frustration was beginning to eclipse her excitement.
"... And then there was today." Thunderhead scratched his head, trying not to think too hard about it. "It even feels kind of unfair to me, but there's nothing we can do about it."
"I thought today was fun!" Taboo said, hopping up and down a little.
"It wasn't without its good points." Even Thunderhead had to admit he had enjoyed the event on some level. "But for you mother... well, I don't think I have to explain how she feels."
"Hungry?" Taboo asked, watching her mother put away more of the pie with a somber look on her face.
"She is eating her feelings." Thunderhead tried to explain, but Taboo only cocked her head. "You'll understand one day, and you'll understand why this is all so strange one day... hopefully far in the future..."
"Moooommy, Ah'm hungwy," Applerose whined, but her mother shushed her again. "Why is it dark?"
"I told you, sweetie, it's a surprise party," Roseluck said, trying to calm the filly down. "We're going to surprise Soarin', okay?"
"I don't like it." Applerose had tears in the corner of her eyes. Roseluck had her work cut out for her trying to keep the filly calm, but she managed to keep their corner of Sugarcube Corner silent.
"Maybe if we had a surprise party for me, the surprise would cause me to go into labor," Rainbow Dash said, but Thunderhead just shushed her. He didn't even want to acknowledge that desperate scheme. "C'mon, work with me here."
"I want to evict our foal from your body as soon as possible too," Thunderhead said in a whisper, keeping his eyes trained on the door. "But you're due any day now. Just let nature take its course." He let out a yawn. It was seven at night, which was pretty early for him to be up and about on a workday. Rainbow Dash had insisted on going to this party, and she only insisted because Pinkie Pie had insisted. Nopony was particularly keen on the stallion of the hour, but their love of Pinkie Pie was enough for them to at least show up and enjoy the party.
"It's spring now..."
"Since three days ago." Thunderhead was anxious too, but it was currently his responsibility to keep his girl happy. Whatever he needed to say to calm her down was going to get said. "You've still got over a month before Spring Training begins. You'll make it, both of you."
"But what if-"
"He's coming!"
The room fell absolutely silent. Sure enough, the sound of Soarin' chatting loudly about something got louder and louder behind Sugarcube Corner's door. Everypony took a moment to pity Applejack, who had been tasked with retrieving the stallion and bringing him to the bakery. The knob rattled just before the door swung open.
"-so it turns out you really can fry anything."
"Surpri-!"
"Aaaaaaaaaaugh! " Soarin' jumped, not even beating his wings even once as he rapidly ascended. He conked his head on the roof of the building and then latched onto the rafters. Applejack turned the lights back on so everypony could see the shuddering stallion suspended from the ceiling. "... Oh... uh... sorry... not a big fan of surprises."
"No kiddin'," Applejack said.
"Eeyup."
"Sorry... sorry." Soarin' came down from the rafters and mustered a smile, even though he was still visibly shaking. "So... uh... what's with surprising me today? Is it some kind of holiday?"
Everypony took turns looking at one another. For a moment, they thought that Soarin' must be joking. He couldn't have forgotten his own birthday, seeing as the guy seems to remember every stupid little thing that happens.
"It's not your birthday?" Twilight asked. Soarin' shook his head, which prompted everybody to look up at the banner hung from the rafters.
"Happy Birthday Surprise," Soarin' said, reading aloud. "Weird. Did Pinkie forget my birthday... again?"
"Of course not, silly!" Pinkie Pie said, suddenly making herself known from behind the counter. "But we're not celebrating your birthday!"
"Then whose?"
"Surprise's birthday, duh!" Pinkie Pie was met with a chorus of crickets. Nopony knew what in the world she was talking about, but this time they were even more confused than usual. Everypony had a very bad feeling about what was going to happen next. "Maaaude! Bring her out!"
Maude Pie, who nopony realized was even around today, emerged from the kitchen accompanied by a cloud of confetti. The stoic mare marched into the room and took up her post next to her little sister. The whole time, everypony's eyes stayed fixed on what was strapped to her chest.
"Maude... what is that?" Twilight was the first to speak up for the crowd. They waited patiently for an answer while Maude looked down as if to confirm what she already knew.
"This is my niece." The blonde filly secured to Maude's chest shouted some excited gibberish, as way of some form of introduction.
"Your niece." Twilight blinked once. A profound silence hung over the room. "So... the daughter of your sister?"
"Yes." Maude gestured to Pinkie Pie, who was grinning ear to ear while bouncing up and down. "This sister." That was when the general uproar began. Different ponies shouted different things at one another while some of them shouted stuff at Pinkie Pie, who appeared entirely unimpressed with the entire hubub. Even in the dense confusion and roar of the gathered crowd, one voice of concern managed to rise above all of them.
"WAIT A SECOND HOLD ON." Soarin' zoomed across the room and got nose to nose with Pinkie. Despite the panic on his face, Pinkie remained simply ecstatic. "That's-this is-you're-huh-what-howwhenididn'tevenisit-I mean-whatwhatwhatWHATWHATWHAAAAA-"
"Please calm down," Maude said. "You will get Surprise all worked up and then we will never get her down for a nap."
"I think there are some more important things to talk about right now!" Soarin's concerns were everypony's concerns currently. "I mean... Pinkie, you were pregnant?"
"Well, yeah, totally," Pinkie Pie said like it was no big deal. She gave Soarin' a peck on the nose. "I mean, that's what you do to have a foal, duh. You're so funny!" Surprise giggled and clapped her front hooves. Pinkie Pie removed her from the carrier so she could be the one to hold her.
"But somepony had to have noticed!" Twilight said, joining Soarin' on the front lines. "I mean... you weren't... I didn't see you... you didn't look pregnant!"
"Oh, that's because I kept it a secret," Pinkie Pie said, rocking Surprise back and forth. "I used the art of perception to hide my belly, and sometimes I hid it in this hat!" Pinkie Pie took out a large felt hat, which she placed on Maude's head.
"So that's why you were wearing that hat like that!" Soarin' smacked himself in the face. "I didn't ask because I thought you were doing it just to see if I would ask..."
"It was the perfect crime!" Pinkie Pie and Surprise giggled in unison.
"But why did you keep it a secret?" Applejack asked.
"Eh, for fun."
"... That's it?" Fluttershy asked after a sizable pause.
"Thaaaat's it." Pinkie was as enigmatic as ever. Surprise yelled something else in gibberish. "Well, that and the whole being pregnant thing was getting pretty mainstream. I didn't want everypony to think I was doing it just to be cool."
"A-and... it's... mine?" Soarin's question was met with an immediate answer as Surprise spread open her little wings. "Ho... hooooo boy."
"Needless to say, our family is not entirely pleased with our unwed mother and bastard child," Maude said. "I am supposed to get you to marry her under threat of violence."
"Well, it wouldn't be the most disagreeable thing I've been forced to do."
"Yay!" Pinkie Pie shouted. She shoved Surprise into Soarin's hooves and then gave him a hug. "I've already got it aaaaaall figured out! There are like three houses that are right in our price range that I think will work great for us and they're all two bedroom so Surprise can have a room of her own! The yards aren't huge, but I figured we wouldn't need a hard since our family is two-thirds pegasi and you can just fly around in the air for exercise, oh, but one of the houses has a breakfast nook! It's suuuper quaint and it just feels like that upscale country living that everyone is always looking for. I knooow you're not big on the burbs, but just hear me out on this one because we'll be super close to pretty much everypony I know, which is everypony, and I won't be so far away that I'll have to give up my job here or anything like that and let's face it your commute is gonna be a long one either way and I'd like you to get back to me on this house thing as soon as possible because I really think we should knock it out before the wedding which speaking of I think we should just run with the whole accidental-wedding theme because it is just so us. It might've been a bit preemptive, but I already booked that band that played at Dashie's reception, you know the guys with the horrible burns? Anyway, let's talk about the details later because I am bushed! You'll look after her while I crash, won't you?"
"S-Surprise?"
"No, Maude," Pinkie said. "She gets lonely real easy."
"I have social needs."
Rainbow Dash watched the scene unfold while Thunderhead watched her. He saw her eye twitch a couple of times, which confirmed his worst fears. She had the expression of somepony who'd just watched the tail of the second-to-last racer disappear over the horizon.
"Dash..."
"... It's fine... I'm fine." Rainbow Dash turned around and started heading towards the door. "I think I'm going to go home."
"Dash, we can't just leave right now," Thunderhead said, trying to get her to reconsider. Rainbow Dash did stop for a moment and turn back around. "One of your friends just had a foal... apparently. Look, I know you're probably disappointed, but at least stick around to congratulate her."
"... Fine." Rainbow Dash picked up a pie from the refreshments table. "But I'm eating this whole thing."
"I'm going to go with Venom to the orchard!" Taboo shouted into the house before closing the door behind her. Rainbow Dash wasn't quick enough to stop her these days. She made a note to crack down a bit once she wasn't pregnant anymore.
"Okay... bye," she said to the closed door. She put down her book for a second and looked at her stomach. "Just you and me again, I guess. No, your father doesn't count because he's asleep. If you want him to wake up, you could alwaaays... eh, it was worth a shot. You hungry? I'm hungry. It's snack time." Rainbow Dash got herself and her passenger up and wandered into the kitchen. After five or so minutes of raiding her own fridge, she wandered back out into the den with her so called "snack."
Rainbow Dash had become uncomfortably complacent with this sedentary kind of life she'd found herself living. She ate an alarming number of meals on her couch and by default spent the entire day inside. She hardly had any company during the middle of the day aside from Tank and her belly. Until she was tied down, she didn't realize how much of her day depended on her ability to just move from place to place. On some level, she felt it was almost sacrilegious that she had handicapped perhaps the fastest pony ever. She at least had the comfort of knowing that things were only going to get better.
"So... when are you going to come on out?" Rainbow Dash asked before biting into a carrot. "I mean, the pressure is on now. Spring Training is one month away as of today. You're not going to make me miss it, are you? I know I've told you a million times how important it is to me. I want to get back in shape and get back to being awesome. Trust me, you'll be impressed at how awesome your mom is."
Rainbow Dash got no response from inside herself.
"Yeah, well, the inside story doesn't do me justice." Rainbow Dash stared at her stomach as if she expected a response. None ever came, which served to upset her for all the wrong reasons. "Well, if you like it so much in there maybe you can just stay forever!"
"Dash?"
Rainbow Dash jumped a bit at Thunderhead's voice. She looked up to see him on the stairs. He looked groggy, which was appropriate seeing how high the sun was in the sky. It was uncommon for anything to wake him up, but the thought that his wife could go into labor at any second made it hard to sleep sometimes.
"... Was I yelling again?" Rainbow Dash asked, trying to hide a bit behind her belly. Thunderhead scratched his chin and nodded. "Sorry."
"Need some company?"
"You should sleep." Rainbow Dash protested, but Thunderhead continued on down the stairs anyway. "I don't want to keep you up."
"You will whether you want to or not," Thunderhead said, taking a seat on the floor beside the couch. If he sat anywhere comfortable, there was a high probability that he would just fall asleep. "Besides, we're going to have to adjust to not sleeping in the near future."
"Don't stop at near future. Why not tomorrow?"
"If tomorrow works, why not today?"
"I tried talking him into today," Rainbow Dash said, patting her belly. "I don't think it's happening."
"Maybe your diplomacy needs a little work," Thunderhead said. He put his ear against his wife's stomach and spoke to its resident. "You want to come on out, kiddo? Your mother and father are anxious to meet you. It's a lot of fun out here."
"Trust me, he knows all about what's out here," Rainbow Dash said, reclining back into the couch. "I've already given him the lowdown on what his life is going to be like."
"Really?"
"Really." Rainbow Dash knew Thunderhead had heard this speech before, but she also knew he was humoring her in order to keep her entertained. "He's going to be a legacy Wonderbolt, following in the hoofsteps of his mother. He'll be the second youngest pony ever to be named captain."
"Because the first younger will be you, right?"
"Perfection will be a hard act to follow." She waited for Thunderhead to retort, but he just smirked and shook his head. "He'll get married to a nice mare and they'll have kids that will be Wonderbolts too. It'll be the start of the Rainbow Dash Dynasty."
"Knowing you, I bet you've already got the wife picked out."
"I didn't really have any in mind... but..."
"I'm not sure I want to know."
"You brought it up," she said, poking him on the nose. "But I think Surprise would be a good match for him."
"For real?"
"Just think about it," Rainbow Dash said. Thunderhead refrained from asking why he would want to think about it or why Rainbow Dash had been thinking about it. He realized she really had spent too much time alone. "She's already a friend of the family, she's got a Wonderbolt for a father, and if she's Pinkie's kid she's gonna have a lot of energy. Their kids are gonna be the fastest ever."
"Well, I'm glad you've got dreams for the kid," Thunderhead said, rubbing her belly.
"It's my job."
"But you do know it's up to the kid what he, or she, wants to do and be, right?" Thunderhead decided to give his wife a bit of a reality check seeing as she'd been cooped up in her little world for so long. "Your parents probably didn't think you'd be a Wonderbolt since before you were in the womb."
"Dad thought I'd be a civil engineer," she said. "I'm still not sure what that is exactly."
"But that's the point." Thunderhead smiled, despite how tired he felt. "I know you're not stupid or entirely selfish-"
"Oh, 'entirely?'"
"But I just need to know you're ready for whatever happens, and I mean whatever whatever. Not just whatever, but whatever. You know?"
"Y-yeah... whatever." There was a clear expression of sorrow on Rainbow Dash's face. Thunderhead couldn't place why, but he wasn't left in the dark for long. "I'm just tired of waiting. I've run through this kid's life from beginning to end like a thousand times in my head, but only because it isn't happening right in front of me yet. I'm impatient, so sue me... but..."
"But you're done with the pregnancy thing."
"I don't care who they turn out to be," Rainbow Dash said. She turned to her belly and addressed it directly. "Well, I do care, but that's because I'm your mom. I want you to turn out okay and not be a criminal or anything, that'd be nice. Look, the point is that I don't care if you want to be a Wonderbolt or a civil engineer. It'd be nice if you turned out just like I wanted, but as a mother of one already I know you can't predict how any of this crazy crap will turn out. I just want to make sure you come out happy and healthy. Heck, you don't even have to be a colt."
Rainbow Dash tensed up as a wave of pain rocked her all of a sudden. Her eyes got wide as she felt what she could only describe as her body going into overdrive or something. The sensation was new, but there wasn't even an inkling of a doubt what was going on.
"H-H-Honey?!" she grabbed Thunderhead's hoof, an action whose meaning was not lost on him.
"What? Now? Actually?"
"What're you smiling for? Oooof!" Rainbow Dash remembered wondering exactly what giving birth was going to feel like. At the moment, she felt like she had been incredibly stupid for wondering. It was gonna hurt, that much was clear. "Hospital! Now! Please?"
"It's alright, it's alright." Thunderhead felt the adrenaline entering into his system. He was up and about, grabbing the overnight bag from next to the door and putting it on his back. He tried not to smile as per his wife's request, but found himself grinning nonetheless. He was somewhere between excited and extremely nervous to the point of cracking, hence the smile. "Just breath, Dash. This is what you trained for!"
"I trained to be a Wonderbolt, not this!"
"Relax."
"Relax is hard." Rainbow Dash was doing an admirable job of not panicking, although she found herself wishing she didn't need to try so hard. She could help but be scared. She wasn't a huge fan of pain, but there was a pretty big silver lining to all of this. "It's happening! It's actually happening!"
"This is ridiculous! Where did she go?" Venom ran the circumference of another tree, which once again yielded no results. Pumpkin and Pound watched her, very much used to this song and dance. "Can she turn invisible or something?"
"Not as far as we know," Pound said, not totally sold on the idea that she couldn't.
"You weren't kidding when you said she's good," Venom said, dashing off towards the orchard's fence. Pumpkin and Pound accompanied her as she scanned the perimeter. They went past the large oak outside the farm, but Taboo wasn't around there. They passed the part of the fence smashed by a runaway wagon, but there was still no Taboo. They passed stony bend in the creek, but they were no closer to finding Taboo there either. They didn't see her anywhere. "She's a little too good at this. My mom is always saying that hiding is what changelings do best, but Taboo is a lot better than any of the changelings I know..."
"You should just give up," Pound said, but Venom just sneered at him.
"I'm not a quitter like you!" she said, bounding off back the way they came for another pass.
"Better a quitter than stupid..."
"What was that?"
"Nothing."
"Hey, you guys!" The three little ponies were graced with an unexpected visitor as Scootaloo came soaring down from the sky and landed among them. She looked about, clearly in some kind of panic. "Where's Taboo?"
"We don't know," Pumpkin said.
"What?! You lost her?" Scootaloo picked up Pumpkin and began shaking her. "How could you lose her? And at a time like this? Why don't you know where she is?"
"Because we're playing hide-and-seek!" Pumpkin managed to say right before Scootaloo dropped her on her rear.
"Oh, that explains it," the older mare said, much calmer now. She put her hooves to her mouth and started shouting into the air. "Hey, Taboo! We gotta go to the hospital! Your mom went into labor!"
"Into labor?"
The whole group swung around to see Taboo rise up from what had been a previously empty spot on the shore of the creek. The three children were dumbstruck, but Scootaloo didn't have time to sit around and puzzle over it. She jumped the fence and approached Taboo, who was in turn scampering over the smooth river stones to get to her.
"My mom is giving birth? Right now?" Taboo asked with a grin spreading from ear to ear. Her mother had been talking up the role of being a big sister for a long while now. She was ready to assume her station of responsibility. "How do you know?"
"Please, how could I not know? Your mother is like my hobby," Scootaloo said with a sly grin. She shook it off and remembered that there were more important things to attend to. "I caught your parents in transit and they asked me to come get you. I'm gonna give you a ride to the hospital, alright?"
"They couldn't send somepony else?"
"Just get on."
With only a slight bit of reluctance, which was mostly just following protocol on Taboo's part, Taboo hopped onto Scootaloo's back. Without wasting another second, Scootaloo lifted both ponies off the ground and took off for the hospital as fast as her wings would allow. The other three were left on the ground to wave off their friend.
"Tell your mom good luck!" Pumpkin shouted, waving ecstatically with both hooves.
"Why did she pick now to give birth?" Venom was very confused by the whole exchanged she'd just witnessed. "Is it because the weather is warmer? Or did that guard that lives in Taboo's house finish building a nest for the eggs? Why are they going to the hospital and what is a hospital?"
"There aren't hospitals where you're from?" Pound asked out of sheer curiosity. "What do you do when you get sick?"
"I don't get sick," Venom said as if it were really that simple. "But some of my sisters have gotten sick."
"Where did they go?"
Venom didn't give a verbal response; she just shrugged.
"Maybe we can go to the hospital ourselves and see Taboo's new brother for ourselves," Pumpkin said as she bounded up and down. "Then we can show Venom what a hospital is too!"
"Is a hospital public?" Venom asked. "Because my mom says I can't go into public unless I'm somepony else."
"Well, there are lot of ponies there, so I guess it is public," Pound said. "But do we really have to go? The hospital is far away and I don't wanna walk all the way there."
"Then we can just go to Sugarcube Corner and ask Pinkie what the hospital was like! She must've went there when she gave birth to Surprise." Pumpkin had a valid point, but Pound still had many a doubt on the subject. His parents had been a bit tight-lipped on all the technicalities. They had promised to tell him when he was older, which he learned meant they were probably never going to tell him.
"Sugarcube Corner? That's the bakery thing you were talking about, right?" Venom had other things on her mind, namely figuring out what these "pastry" things were and why Pumpkin was always raving about them. This seemed like a good opportunity to do some spy work. "Yes, let's go there."
"Then let's not waste time around here!" Pumpkin lead the pack away from the orchard and into town, followed by her silent but complacent brother. Bringing up the rear was a young unicorn filly that neither of the Cake twins had ever seen before, but they'd become used to such things happening.
"We giving birth in here?" A large unicorn dressed in a white coat and levitating a clipboard entered into the room where Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead were waiting. The nurse had already informed them that their usual doctor wasn't in today, to which Rainbow Dash responded that she was willing to let anyone qualified help her evacuate her child at this point. As far as they could tell things were progressing normally, but they were relieved to finally have a professional in the room. He was joined by other nurses that appeared to be gearing up to get the deed done.
"Yes, that's us," Thunderhead said as if the question actually merited a sincere answer. "I mean, thanks for coming doctor..."
"Dr. Salt. I'm sorry that Dr. P couldn't make it today, but I've delivered my fair share of foals in my career," Dr. Salt said, reassuring the couple. "We've got the lowdown on how you're doing, Mrs. Dash, so the only thing left to do is finally deliver a healthy foal with no drama."
"Yeah, sure, no drama, let's do it." Rainbow Dash was sweating from every pore from both nerves and strain. She didn't have to be a professional to tell that the big moment was almost upon them. "Thanks Doc."
"Don't mention it," Dr. Salt said, putting on some gloves and a mask. "And again, sorry your normal doctor couldn't be here. He ran into, a bit of trouble."
"We're just glad you're here, doctor," Thunderhead said, reassuring Dr. Salt that his presence was greatly appreciated; however, the doctor suddenly got a very distant look in his eyes and began gazing at some fixed point on the wall.
"Yes... he ran into... a bit of trouble..."
"Doctor?" Thunderhead looked up at the wall. There was nothing notable on it for the doctor to be staring at, unless there was some reason he got particularly misty eyed over illustrations of the musculature of the haunches. Thunderhead glanced at Rainbow Dash, but he was glad to see she was a bit too preoccupied to have picked up on the doctor's odd behavior. Still, the vacant stare merited looking into. "You okay there?"
"I'm sorry... it's just-"
"Doctor!" Some mare, who was notably not dressed like a doctor at all, burst into the room. "I cannot hide it any longer. I love you!"
"Whoah!" When Thunderhead looked over at Rainbow Dash this time, he saw her staring at the intruder. She looked confused, in addition to strained and in a deal of physical pain. Thunderhead was right there with her for the former emotion.
"Not now Delilah! Can't you see I have a life in my hooves!" Dr. Salt yelled at her. "Why don't you go back to Javier and his mansion?"
"But I don't love Javier! I love you!" Delilah ran up and embrace Dr. Salt, which alarmed Thunderhead and Rainbow Dash because there was no way she was sterile. "Don't push me away!"
"Get away from me you lying harpy!" Dr. Salt pushed Delilah to the ground, which caused several of the nurses to startle. "Don't think I don't know what you did. I know you were the one who murdered my brother." There was an appropriate amount of gasping after the doctor's accusation.
"Is this happening?" Rainbow Dash asked, probably the most anxious pony in the room right now. "Is this actually happening?"
"I would never have hurt your brother! I loved him!" Delilah said, getting back onto her hooves. "I was even carrying his child! I didn't kill him!"
"She's right."
"Oh, super, another one!" Rainbow Dash was far beyond in the mood for more antics as yet another pony, dressed in a pinstripe suit, sauntered into the room.
"That's because I killed your brother," the newcomer said, garnering even more gasps.
"Tony Calzone!"
"Yes, Tony Calzone!" said Tony Calzone. "I control all the money in this hospital, so I'd just like to see you do something about it!"
"You killed my brother?" Dr. Salt asked, his eyes red with tears.
"Yes! And I'd do it again!"
"Then you just might have to!" Dr. Salt reached into his coat and pulled out a little mustache, which he applied to his face. There was another round of gasping, except for Thunderhead and Rainbow Dash. They couldn't find the precedence for gasping. "I'm not Dr. Salt at all! I'm his brother, Dr. Cinnamon."
"You! But I killed you!" Tony Calzone said, taking a few steps back.
"Oh, my precious Cinnamon!" Delilah said, embracing the doctor again. Once more, he instantly knocked her to the ground. "Oh, but why?"
"Because I know it wasn't my child you were carrying," Dr. Cinnamon and not Salt said. "You say you love me, but all this time I know who you were really in love with."
"Yes, it's true," said yet another stranger as he entered the room in a shirt he hadn't completely committed to buttoning all the way up. Even though there was no breeze, his hair seemed to sway defiantly in a wind that only effected him. "But you have to understand, Dr. Cinnamon, that she only loved my money. I could never have her heart, even if she was carrying my child."
"But you took her away from me anyway!"
"Yes... because I love her. And I still do!" The fourth stranger, who had forgone an introduction, embraced Delilah. "Please, come back to me my sweet flower! I can give you the world."
"I can't let you do that," said a fifth stranger, who sauntered into the room in a full tuxedo.
"Javier!"
"Javier!" one of the nurses instantly glommed onto the stallion, who payed her no mind.
"Delilah is mine," said Javier. "And I cannot let you have her."
"But I don't belong to you," said Delilah. She threw off the fourth stranger and grabbed onto Dr. Cinnamon. "I'm in love with Dr. Cinnamon."
"Yes, we've established that," Rainbow Dash said, butting into the middle. "Can we please get back to the part where I'm giving birth?!"
"She's right," said Javier, staring right at Dr. Cinnamon. "You have other concerns right now... brother."
"What did you say?" Dr. Cinnamon threw Delilah to the floor again. Thunderhead was starting to feel sorry for the poor mare; however, the fourth stranger had still to stand up since he'd been knocked down. At least Delilah got back up like a champ.
"That's right: I am Dr. Salt," said Javier, who was actually Dr. Salt.
"But I killed you!" Tony Calzone, who apparently was just the worst at killing ponies, said.
"Javier!"
"You can't be my brother!" Dr. Cinnamon said. "My brother died in a tragic boating accident!"
"I'm starting to think Tony Calzone doesn't belong here," Thunderhead said.
"None of these ponies belong here!" Rainbow Dash winced and braced herself as a contraction rocked her body. There wasn't much time left. "Could somepony-*hoooo*-please deliver-*hoooo*-my foal now?!"
"This mare is right," Dr. Cinnamon said. "Anypony who isn't a doctor had better get out of here."
"Thank-*hoooo*-you."
"But that means you have to go too," said the fourth stranger, making a very sudden and miraculous recovery from his position on the floor. "You're no real doctor, Cinnamon."
"Is that true?" Delilah said, embracing Cinnamon who is not a doctor again. "You lied about being a doctor? Why? Why?!"
"Because it was the only way we could be together!" Cinnamon said, bringing Delilah closer. "It was the only way our love could endure!"
"Oh, Cinnamon!" Delilah and Cinnamon began to furiously make out, much to Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead's great displeasure.
"Get your hooves off of her!" Dr. Salt said, breaking up the completely unfounded display of affection. "You belong with me, a real doctor!"
"But you're not a real doctor either, brother," Cinnamon said. "I know you dropped out of medical school due to a tragic boating accident."
"Damn you Cinnamon... damn you!"
"Javier!"
"Come Delilah, let us escape!" Cinnamon said, galloping out of the room with Delilah by his side.
"No! My sweet Delilah!" the fourth stranger said, as he pursued him. He was followed closely by Salt, who continued cursing his brother's name with one of the nurses hanging off of him. The only pony who remained with Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead was Tony Calzone. He stared at Rainbow Dash, who glared back at him. She had a horrible feeling in her gut, and it wasn't the quick contractions she was experiencing.
"... Well, let's get that foal delivered," Tony Calzone, or apparently Dr. Tony Calzone, said as one of the nurses helped him into his white coat. Another nurse handed him a clipboard which he looked over before handing back. He took a good look at what Rainbow Dash had going on and then nodded. "Alright, Mrs. Dash, it's time for the big show. Your foal has begun to crown, so are you ready to push it on out?"
"Did you really murder someone?" Thunderhead asked out of what he could only describe as morbid curiosity.
"Push!"
Rainbow Dash couldn't care less about who's brother he had or hadn't killed at the moment. Every fiber of her being and every last instinct inside her just wanted the pony inside her on the outside of her. Painful inch by painful inch, she pushed. It was hard work, but she could hear Thunderhead cheering her on. She held on tight to his hoof and he held on just as tightly. As scared as she felt, she soldiered on. She shouldered the pain, all the while wondering exactly how much was left to do.
Then, she heard the sound of crying.
"I'm just saying I think I deserve a heads up next time, you know? I mean, we're besties, aren't we? You wouldn't leave your bestie in the dark, would you?"
"... Well, I guess not," Fluttershy said. She rocked Maple back and forth while the filly sucked away at her bottle. "I'm sorry, Discord. It's just that you're so busy that I forgot you didn't know."
"No, no, it's fine, water under the bridge," he said, setting down his teacup and saucer on the coffee table. "Anypony could've forgotten. I understand completely!" He smiled from ear to ear to ear, and he did so earnestly. He was glad to just be up to date now.
"Thanks for being so understanding." Fluttershy smiled back at him, glad to see he was taking all of this so well.
"Well, what are besties for?" Discord cleared his throat and leaned in a little closer. "So... did you decided on, uhm well, godparents for this wee little thing yet?" He chuckled a bit and leaned in even closer.
"Oh, yes we have!"
"... What?!" That was not the answer Discord had been hoping for. "W-who? Who?!"
"Well, Timey and I tho-"
"You know what, nevermind. I don't wanna know." Discord slumped back and melted onto the floor. "It's whatever... I don't care." The puddle of Discord began to soak into the carpet, not leaving much of his body to be seen. Fluttershy had to wonder if he would leave a stain.
"Is... something the matter?"
"... Can I be perfectly honest?" Discord asked, rising out from the carpet just a little. Fluttershy nodded, even though she was unsure where this was going. "It's just that... I wanted to be the godparent."
"Really?" Fluttershy smiled brightly. "Oh my, I had no idea you would be interested!"
"You didn't think I would be interested?" Discord rose all the way back up and sat on the couch without leaving a stain. "Of course I would be! I'm all about marginally pointless accolades!"
"Then I'll have to talk to Timey about letting you be the godparent for the next foal!"
"The next one?" Discord asked. "You're going for the triple-play?"
"Oh, yes, we are," Fluttershy said with a little giggle. "We always talked about having a big family, and we don't see the point in waiting. Willow and Maple have been so good that we're eager to continue!"
"Oh my gawd, I have to be the first to know when you know you're expecting!" Discord said, flipping onto his belly on the couch. "Wait, am I the first to know that you're expecting to expect? Oh. Mah. Gawd."
"Well, it wasn't really a secret." Fluttershy put Maple's bottle down and lifted the filly up onto her shoulder. She rocked back and forth gently while patting the filly's back. "But, if you like meaningless titles so much..."
"I'll take it!" Discord reached out and pulled a slip of paper out from behind Fluttershy's ear. He tucked it away behind his own and hummed merrily. "Now where is that spineless husband of yours? He needs to get on with producing my godchild!"
"Discord!"
"Right, right... not in front of the foal, but I'm holding you to this godchild thing!"
"-And then another doctor comes in and she says that she's the other doctor's evil twin! And I'm all 'What, no way! That means Don Gazpacho knew where the money was all along!' Then Surprise came out and the gangster told me she was a girl!" Pinkie said, the foal in question seated up on her back. "Any questions?"
"Yes," Venom said. "What is a doctor?"
"The hospital sure sounds like a lot of fun!" Pumpkin said. "We should've gone with Taboo! Then we could've seen all that exciting stuff!"
"I'm glad we stayed here." Pound felt like he might be scarred for life after hearing that story. He shook it off, sure that Pinkie had elaborated most of it if not all of it. He just couldn't believe that Maude would've had to diffuse a bomb while her sister was in labor. He decided to change the subject. "Mom and dad said you're moving out to live with Mr. Soarin'. Is that true?"
"Thaaaaat's right!" Pinkie set Surprise down on the floor next to the three young ponies. Surprise attached herself to Pumpkin instantly and began gurgling and babbling happily at the filly. "I'll be shackin' up with my baby daddy, but I'll still be working here at the bakery."
"It'll be... quiet without you around," Pound said just as Surprise yelled something in gibberish. "And without Surprise."
"You can all totally come and visit me!" Pinkie gathered all four of the young ponies together for a big hug. "Come anytime! I'll leave the door unlocked!"
"That doesn't sound safe." Pound was the sole voice of reason in the hug. The others weren't listening to him, as Pinkie was going on about the house she was planning to buy and Pumpkin and Venom peppered her with different questions on the subject. Surprise only added to the din by babbling animatedly along with the others. Pound couldn't help but notice how much it seemed like she knew exactly what was going on, but he knew that just couldn't be the case. Surprise wasn't old enough to know, so it didn't make any sense.
"What do you think? Canterlot University or the University of Canterlot? Canterlot University? University of Canterlot? CU or UC?"
"I think it's about eighteen or so years too early to be thinking about that," Pierce said, trying to focus on his book while his wife levitated brochures around his head. "But if you want my honest opinion: University of Canterlot."
"Oh, and why's that?"
"They've got a good hoofball team," Pierce said with a shrug. One of the brochures conked him on the head. "What if she wants to be a doctor?"
"Oh, you're right!" Rarity shuffled through the brochures once again, realizing she had completely forgotten the possibility of med school. "Oh, this is just terrible! How am I supposed to get any planning done now?"
"You could always wait for Finesse to grow up and begin formulating her own opinions."
"She already has opinions," Rarity said, quite certain of the fact. "She is a very intelligent young filly! I just know she is. She'll be able to do anything she puts her mind to."
"What if she wants to conduct the train?"
"Then I'll buy her a train!"
Pierce put his book down and looked over at his wife. "Aaand... what if she wants to be a soccer player?"
"She'll have her own little team with cute little uniforms!"
"A lawyer?"
"She will be the sharpest dressed prosecutor on the stand."
"A school janitor?"
"Jumpsuits are going to be back in vogue very soon, trust me."
"A coal miner?"
"Oooh! Coal is where diamonds come from!"
"A fashion designer?"
Rarity paused. She stared at the far wall of the room for a while. "It'd be wise to manage my expectations. Children will want to do what they will want to do. I just want to be supportive so she can give it her all."
"You know what I think?" Pierce leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. "I think she's going to be just fine."
"Moooooooommy! Daaaaaaaaaaddy!" Applerose trotted as fast as her little legs would go. She kept going until she was headlong into Roseluck's embrace where she began to bawl openly. Big Macintosh was in the kitchen right after her, heeding the call of his offspring.
"Shh, shh, oh sweetie, what's the matter?" Roseluck comforted the little filly, petting her back as is rose and fell between sobs. "It's okay, sweetie. Tell mommy what's the matter."
"T-there's a s-spider!" Applerose managed to say before redoubling her tears.
"Oh, you saw a spider? Where was it? Was it in your room?" Roseluck asked. The little filly nodded, too choked up to say anything. Roseluck looked up at Big Macintosh, who already had a rolled up newspaper in his mouth. "Daddy is gonna take care of it, alright?"
"Eeyup." The assurance didn't do anything to calm the filly down, but Big Macintosh marched on to vanquish the offending arachnid anyway.
"It's alright, you'll be okay." Roseluck continued to comfort her while Applejack entered into the kitchen, also drawn in by her niece's lament. When she saw Roseluck down on the floor comforting Applerose, she couldn't help but roll her eyes. As typical as the scene was, she was growing tired of seeing it.
"Y'all spoil her too much," Applejack said over the sobbing. "A filly her age can stomp her own spiders."
"Applejack..."
"No!" Applerose shouted, burying her face further into Roseluck's chest. "It's icky!"
"It's just a spider! Toughen up!"
"Noooo!" Applerose broke free of Roseluck and charged towards her aunt. Before Applejack could consider getting out of the way, the tiny pony rammed her at full speed right in the shin. Applejack winced and jumped up, the headbutt smarting a lot more than she anticipated.
"Why you!" Applejack tried to capture Applerose, but the mess of tears was already scampering out of the kitchen. She turned to pursue, but putting down the rammed hoof caused another twinge of pain. "Consarn it! That's gonna leave a bruise! What's with that filly?"
"She's very sensitive," Roseluck said, now trying to get Applejack to calm down.
"Sensitive nothin'!" Applejack grunted and tried her hoof again, easing it down through the pain. "Honestly, if she wasn't so gosh darn adorable Ah'd have half a mind to whup her!"
"She'll grow out of it." Roseluck glanced down at the floor for a moment, avoiding Applejack's skeptical gaze. Without reestablishing eye contact, she trotted along after her daughter. "Eventually..."
"Nonpony working here is very helpful," Scootaloo said, leading Taboo around the bustling halls of the hospital. Taboo was right by her side, since the filly wasn't particularly fond of this place. Even if she wasn't totally amicable with Scootaloo, concessions were to be made in times of trouble. "C'mon Taboo, they've got to be around here somewhere."
"Okay..."
They continued wandering through the hospital, Scootaloo leading the way as she tried to follow the posted maps to the maternity ward. It didn't take to long to get there, but there was plenty of ponies running around between them and their destination. Compared to the rest of the hospital, the maternity ward was much quieter. They trotted along the virtually empty hall, passing empty room after empty room. It apparently wasn't a very busy day birth-wise in Ponyville.
Taboo's ears perked up. She trotted along ahead of Scootaloo, honing in towards a voice. She could hear her father talking, and her mother too. As they got closer and closer to a closed door in the middle of the hallway, their voices were even clearer. She could hear what they were saying.
"The pony who delivered you might've been a murderer. We don't know. That's right, we don't know."
"We're never speaking of that again."
"Shouldn't we speak of it to the police or something?"
"I'm revoking your holding privileges again. It's mommy's turn again."
"It's only been ten minutes."
"I'm the one who just gave birth. Don't you have to sleep?"
"Don't you?"
Taboo could hear a third pony, but only faintly. They weren't talking, just making noise; however, Taboo had a pretty good idea who it was. When she reached the door, she slid it right open. Her mother and father were right inside, both of them looking like an absolute mess. Rainbow Dash lay in the bed while Thunderhead stood next to her. Taboo's ears twitched to another faint sound. Her mother was holding something.
"Hey squirt," Rainbow Dash said, gesturing for Taboo to enter in. "It's about time."
"Sorry! I'm not all that fast and this place is some kind of crazy maze a-" Scootaloo's apology was cut short by Thunderhead shushing her. He put a hoof to his mouth and jerked his head towards his wife. "Oh... sorry." Everypony talked in hushed tones.
"Well, you're here now." Rainbow Dash shifted a little in the bed and smiled over at Taboo. The young filly didn't say anything, but just continued staring at what her mother was holding. Even if it didn't show, her curiosity was killing her. "There's somepony I'd like you to meet..."
15
"Now if Rocky Road has eight apples and he gives three to Raspberry Ripple, how many apples does Rocky Road have?" the teacher asked. "Does anypony know?" She scanned the room, but nopony moved to raise their hoof. It might've not been because they didn't know, but rather they just didn't want to be in the spotlight and let their classmates know they were smart. For whatever reason, all the hooves in the room stayed down.
Then a single hoof in the back went up.
"Yes?"
"Five?" Taboo wasn't quite sure, but it came up the same when she counted twice.
"Five what?"
"Five... apples."
"Close," the teacher said, turning back to the blackboard. "Five eyes."
Taboo turned towards where the window should've been. Instead of the outside of the schoolhouse, she saw her own reflection staring back at her with five slitted eyes. She watched in horror as her wings extended to five feet in each direction and her ears grew five times their normal size. She took five breaths every second in a panic as her transformation got five times worse at five times the speed.
"I guess the real monster comes out when you turn five," the teacher said, still writing on the blackboard. "School is no place for a monster like you."
Taboo called out for help, but all that came from her throat was a hideous roar that frightened everyone in the town away. She kept growing and expanding, crushing everything in the town until she was finally towering over it with her head in the clouds. One cloud in particular held a familiar house on top of it: her home. She looked into what used to be her room, where she lived before she knew she was a hideous freak. She could see her mother standing in the window, looking up at her. Her mouth was moving, and Taboo could swear she was saying something. She listened closer, and closer, and closer...
"Taboo! Get up or you're going to be late!"
Taboo opened up her eyes. She squinted at the light filtering in through her window onto her face. Although she recalled having some kind of dream, she was too sleepy to remember what it was. She rolled onto her belly, then back onto her back, and then rolled once more off of her bed and onto the floor. She stuck he landing, but continued to stare at the wall opposite of her. She was not a morning pony, and her grogginess was clear evidence of that. Not only did she not normally get up this early, but she had hardly slept last night because she was so nervous and excited all at once; however, it was mostly nervous.
"Knock knock." Rainbow Dash opened the door without actually knocking. "I hope you're ready to inhale breakfast because we've got to get going." Rainbow Dash ducked out of the room without waiting for a response, leaving the door slightly ajar. Taboo stared at where her mother had just been and just processed information for a moment.
"Riiight..." Taboo did her best to walk in a straight line, but she wasn't fully awake yet. She stumbled on out her door and into the hall. She took the stairs one at a time and tottered on into the kitchen. Before she knew it, she was sitting at the table eating cereal while her mother tried to put her bedhead in order. Rainbow Dash had never been one for mane combing, but she knew appearances would be important today. She did her best to get the tangles out and then put Taboo's hairband in.
"Alright, you're ready." She wasn't entirely sure that was true, but after the days and days of prepping for this day she couldn't let herself feel anymore doubt. Her bags were packed and her lunch was all made. All the material preparations were completed, so there was nothing left but to just get right down to it. "You excited for your first day of school?"
"Nnnnrrmmm..."
Rainbow Dash had no way of knowing if that was an affirmative or a negative. Either way, Rainbow Dash herself was anxious. Every single thing had been taken care of, but she was still nervous. Taboo was going to be off on her own in school. That scared her more than she cared to admit. All she could do was keep giving herself and Taboo pep talks.
"Everything is going to be fine." Rainbow Dash had every assurance that this would be true. The only thing she could do was keep repeating that line. "Now hurry up. If you're late, I'm gonna be late and I'm never late; it's just not my style."
Taboo snarfed down the rest of her breakfast and put on her saddlebags. She had checked and double checked that she had everything she needed yesterday. She had notebooks, paper, pencils, crayons, a ruler, and a fat pink eraser. The pack felt a bit heavier today, considering where she had to carry it. She took a deep breath and calmed herself. Her mother had told her over and over again that there was nothing to be afraid of.
"Ready to go?" Rainbow Dash asked, carrying her own bag on her back. She stood next to the front door and opened it on up. Taboo stepped up next to her and nodded.
"Ready."
"Wait."
Both ponies turned about. The sound of little hooves meandering towards them caught their attention as the approaching pony moved through the den. They could already see a head bobbing up and down in a leisurely approach, until the pony came into full view. Taboo and Rainbow Dash waited, albeit a bit impatiently, until the pony was right in front of them, smiling up with bright, blue eyes.
"Did you come to say good-bye?" Rainbow Dash asked. The little pony nodded, a rainbow main bobbing up and down. The bright green pony sauntered right up to Taboo and wrapped her in a little hug.
"Buh-bye. I love you."
"I'll see you after school, alright?" Taboo said, hugging the little filly back. As per usual, the filly didn't immediately let go or even just plain let go at all for that matter. She just continued to hug her sister, even after Taboo lowered her own hooves.
"Okay, that's enough for your sister," Rainbow Dash said, pulling the two apart. It took a great deal of effort, but she finally got one daughter free from the other; however, she then found the smaller one was now stuck to her.
"Buh-bye. I love you."
"I love you too, sunshine." Rainbow Dash gave the little filly a kiss on the forehead while she nuzzled her mother's hoof. "Be good while we're gone, okay? Remember to wake daddy up if you need anything."
"Okay." The filly still didn't let go.
"Aurora, let mommy go so she can leave," Rainbow Dash said just as sweetly as she could.
"No." Aurora continued to smile and nuzzle her hoof. Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes.
"... I think Tank is feeling left out. I think he needs a hug too."
"... Okay." Aurora buzzed her little wings and let her mother go, hovering a good two feet or so in the air. She looked around for Tank, floating off into the den as she took her eyes of her beloved mother and sister. Rainbow Dash and Taboo slipped out before Aurora could turn back around and latch back on, closing the door quietly and carefully.
"We can apologize later," Rainbow Dash said, walking over to the edge of the cloud. Taboo joined her right next to the drop onto terra firma, the wind whipping at their tails and manes. Even though the expressions they wore betrayed the daunting task before them, none of their inhibitions sprang from the open air before them. "School is a bit far off. Think you can make it with your bags?"
Taboo's response was the step off into the ether. She spread her wings and caught the breeze, lifting her above her porch and among the fluffy white clouds. The spring air was cool against the canvas of her wings as each rise and fall of the breeze passed over fully detected by the little filly. She'd been practicing, and she'd been doing it with the best.
"Alright, Ms. Confident, take it easy." Rainbow Dash kicked off the cloud, catching up to her daughter in the blink of an eye. To her surprise, Taboo beat her wings and pulled ahead immediately afterwards. Rainbow Dash was left to stare at her tail until Taboo took a curious look back, which was her last mistake. "Oh, I see how it is. You think you stand a chance against a Wonderbolt in a race?"
Taboo didn't waste time with talk, she just beat her wings and pulled even further ahead. There was no way in all of Equestria's blue sky that she could best her mother, but she had the sudden urge to compete. Rainbow Dash was never one to turn down a challenge, no matter who presented it. She decided giving Taboo a run for her money would be a good prewarm-up warm-up at the very least.
All Rainbow Dash had to do was push ever so slightly to get right behind Taboo. She swung to her left and then to her right, as if looking for an opportunity to pass. Taboo swept back and forth as well, boxing out her mother or at least pretending that was even possible. Rainbow Dash decided to make her move, picking up the pace to just a hair faster than Taboo. She ascended, casting her shadow down onto Taboo. As a cloud passed beneath them, Taboo could see her own shadow eclipsed. She picked up the pace, but she just couldn't get going any faster.
"You'll have to do better than that." Rainbow Dash turned over, gliding above her daughter upside-down. This was literally child's play for her, but she figured she'd been sporting enough. She decided to drop down in front of Taboo before the filly wore herself out. She began to descend into the lead position, but as soon as she got low enough for Taboo to see her the filly suddenly dove down beneath the clouds. Rainbow Dash couldn't see, since she'd put the filly behind her. She slowed down, confident that she'd won soundly. She didn't think to look behind her for another few seconds. "Aww, c'mon!"
Rainbow Dash's showing off had suddenly cost her, as she now had to dive after Taboo beneath the clouds. As green of a flier that Taboo was, she could turn and dive like it was nopony's business. Beneath the cloud, Taboo was busting her hams trying to gain a substantial lead. Rainbow Dash was right behind her and coming in hot, but the schoolyard was in view. The filly and the mare dove straight for their target, both of them dead serious about winning this competition. Taboo had a substantial lead, but Rainbow Dash was far faster than her even in a dive.
Wind whipping and scenery blurring, the ground got closer and closer. Both ponies spread their wings, ready to glide into the finish but unwilling to slow down even one bit at the risk of losing everything in the final second. Rainbow Dash managed to close the gap, forcing the race into a neck to neck situation; however, there was no sky left to race on. Taboo and Rainbow Dash touched down, both of them digging appropriately sized furrows as they slid to a halt in a dust cloud.
They both stood panting and smiling, worn out more from excitement than from effort. As the dust cleared, the schoolyard became visible. There were ponies all over the place. Some of them were chatting with each other while others were trotting into the schoolhouse, but most of them were staring at Rainbow Dash and Taboo. The smiles ran away from their faces, both of them suddenly curious as to why they had been so eager to get here.
"Alright... school... no big deal, right?" Rainbow Dash said, looking down at Taboo.
"... Right." Taboo had been excited about school at first. She only knew a few ponies her own age, so she wanted to meet new ponies and make new friends. The only reason she was scared now is that she could tell how scared her mother was. She couldn't pinpoint the cause of the anxiety, but she realized her fear was not altogether unusual for her. Her mother was always looking out for her in public, keeping between her and anypony they didn't know. It wasn't until recently that she began to wonder why. "Are... are the other kids going to like me?"
"Of course they will!" Rainbow Dash wasn't about to let that kind of doubt stand. "There is no reason they wouldn't like you. They don't even know you yet." Taboo didn't say anything in response. Rainbow Dash wanted so badly to say that she didn't have to go, but that would've been a lie. Taboo had to do this, and she had to do it without Rainbow Dash. This was an important milestone, without a doubt. Intervening would do more harm than good. Children must learn to get by on their own. Besides, Taboo wouldn't be completely alone.
"Taaaaaboooooooooooooo!"
Taboo was knocked out of her thoughts and off of her hooves as a streak of yellow and orange collided into her. She found herself in yet another inescapable hug, but this time it was Pumpkin Cake crushing her. Even though the fillies had just seen each other the next day, Pumpkin's greeting was more akin to a hiatus of several years. Her brother, who arrived right on her heels, wasn't quite so excited about seeing Taboo. He was still all smiles, excited about getting to go to school, but as per usual he couldn't match his sister's energy.
"Ready to go?" Pound asked, disregarding the fact that Taboo couldn't actually inhale any air with which to give him an answer.
"Well, good morning you two," Rainbow Dash said, glad to see the twins weren't at all apprehensive about school. Hopefully their optimism would rub off on Taboo. Rainbow Dash looked around a bit, not seeing Mr. or Mrs. Cake around. "Did you two walk here by yourselves?"
"We don't live far," Pound said. "And morning is a busy time at the bakery."
"Mom and Dad saw us off though," Pumpkin said, finally releasing Taboo before she blacked out. "They told us to make lots of new friends and learn a lot of new things!"
"I'm sure you will," Rainbow Dash said, skipping over the part where she was glad their parents weren't around. She knew they still weren't entirely if at all on board with Taboo. Today was going to be hectic enough without having to confront them, and as if to exemplify this a carriage suddenly rolled up right next to Taboo and the Cake twins. Pulled by two mean looking stallions, the black carriage looked big enough to carry five or six ponies comfortably; however, when the door swung open only a single unicorn filly stepped out onto the street. The only other occupant of the carriage was a withered looking older stallion, dressed in a slick tailcoat.
"Here we are, young miss, at your school."
"I know where we are," the filly said, snapping at her butler. The little pony rolled her eyes before looking at Taboo and shaking her head. "This guy is ridiculous. He acts like he's my butler even when we're back at the hive."
"... Venom?" Taboo asked, looking the filly up and down. "Why do you look like that?"
"My mom said I had to if I want to go to school. She says that if anypony knows I'm a changeling it would be very super bad." Unfortunately Venom was only paraphrasing what Chrysalis had told her, and Chrysalis had told her exactly what would happen. The others took note of the seriousness of her need to disguise herself. "Oh, and I'm not supposed to use my real name. You're supposed to call me Locusta."
"This isn't another one of those spy things, is it?" Pound asked. Venom glared at him for a few moments before sticking up her nose. "What?"
"I am a rich heiress. I don't have to associate with commoners like you."
"What?" Pound waited for a response from the filly without realizing he was never going to get it. "You talked to Taboo."
"Come Taboo, Pumpkin. Let us depart into the school," Venom said, starting towards the schoolhouse with her nose still upturned."
"I'm Pumpkin's twin! Why can you talk to her and not me?" Pound said, chasing after Venom and his sister. Taboo lingered behind with Rainbow Dash for a moment. The mother and daughter looked at one another, realizing it was finally time.
"Bye mom."
"Bye squirt," Rainbow Dash said. She reached out and gave Taboo a big hug, taking care not to crush the precious thing. "I love you."
"I love you too."
There wasn't anything else to say. Rainbow Dash released her daughter and Taboo backed away from her mother. With one final nod of resolve, Taboo trotted after her friends. She didn't turn back. There was an odd feeling of homesickness and heartbreak about her, but she fought it off. Today was supposed to be fun. Everypony had told her that. When she caught up to the others, they were already talking excitedly about what the day held.
"Who?"
"You've met her before, right?" Pumpkin said as the little ponies passed in the school's front doors. Taboo hung close to her friends, almost instinctively hiding behind them from any other eyes in the building. "I mean, have you?"
"Have I?"
"Did you?"
"I don't think she did," Pound said, clearing everything up. "She's really smart, or that's what everypony says. My mom said she would've liked to have her for a teacher herself."
"She might be smart, but does she command an army?" Venom asked in her naive manner. If anypony needed to go to school and learn, it was this unfortunate little changeling. "If she plans on taking us on by herself, she will find that I am very tricky!"
"What exactly do you think school is?" Pound asked the question on everypony's mind.
"Mom didn't explain it, really." Venom looked up at the ceiling and recalled the brief conversation she'd had concerning that matter. "She just said it was very dangerous."
"Nope, school is safe!" Pumpkin said, naive in her own little way. "Just wait until you meet the teacher, then you'll understand."
The group walked into the classroom. There were already colts and fillies sitting in desks and talking to one another, but there was one older mare in the room. She was busy writing her name in the chalkboard, but turned to see the group of four come in. She smiled as she recognized each of them, even one in disguise.
"You'd better take your seats," Twilight said. "Class is about to start."
"So Twilight is really teaching at the school?" Rarity put down her tea for a moment, her eyes constantly flickering over towards the playground. She did her best to give Pinkie and Fluttershy their due attention, but her perpetual concern over a certain little filly was demanding she split her time.
"Yessir, it seems that way!" Pinkie wasn't so concerned, neither with her own child playing by herself or with using the proper honorifics. "The city was having trouble finding new teachers in time for the school year to start, so Twilight decided to help out for the year. I think it's great! Now instead of staying in her stuffy library all day, she can stay in her stuffy classroom all day. Yaaay!"
"So Spike is really running the library on his own?" Fluttershy was only listening to her friends. She had purposefully picked a seat that allowed her a direct view of the playground, since she was twice as concerned as Rarity since she had twice the offspring running around. At the same time, she wasn't exactly sure what her plan of action should something bad happen was supposed to be considering she had a third in progress inside her body at the moment. She decided to just focus on conversation for a moment. "How's that going?"
"Last I checked the library is still empty, as usual," Pinkie said. "Spike doesn't seem to mind. Loafing around suits him, especially now that he can take up more space."
"He has hit a bit of a growth spurt, hasn't he?" Rarity said, referencing the formerly baby dragon's sudden increase in presence. His growth had alarmingly begun overnight, but it slowed to a crawl after a month which was a much needed relief. Now the dragon was roughly the size of a normal pony, but that was only when he was down on all fours. His new size had presented certain troubles as of late. "I hope he doesn't take the empty library personally."
"He'll be fine!" Pinkie broke what would've been a moment of reflective silence otherwise. "He's big and tough now! Nopony is gonna mess with him because they're all scared witless of him!"
"Forgive me for not celebrating." Rarity couldn't blame Pinkie for being so nonchalant about it, but due to the gravity of it all she did wish she'd take it a little more seriously. "Anyway, I do hope they hurry up and find some good teachers for the school. I want to make sure they can provide a top-notch education."
"Turner says that ponies have been talking about hiring teachers from Canterlot for the next year. The town is really serious about making the school better."
"As they should be," Rarity replied. "The foundation for success starts early."
"That's funny," Pinkie said, leaning across the table to get into Rarity's face. "Twilight said the same thing about why she agreed to teach! I think she's really super excited about it!"
"Yes, but Twilight is overqualified to teach little children." Rarity gently shoved Pinkie Pie back into her seat. "And on top of that it takes more than smarts to be a good teacher. You need to be able to get the children's respect."
"But Twilight is a princess," Fluttershy said, butting into the argument. "Everypony respects her... and loves her too, I suppose."
"Yes, but that only works up to a certain age," Rarity said, trying to revive her argument; however, Fluttershy had yet another point to bring up.
"But she's teaching the youngest age group."
"Yes... but she's got no experience with young ponies."
"But she raised Spike practically by herself."
"Her expectations are probably too unrealistic."
"She set reasonable goals when she was teaching your sister and her friends, didn't she?"
"... But she's not a good disciplinarian!"
"Now that just isn't true." Fluttershy had soundly defeated Rarity's argument, and she didn't even have to have that goal in mind when she did it. "I think Twilight really is cut out to be a teacher."
"But she's a princess!" Rarity said, getting to her real problem with the situation. "She should be doing princess-y things, not teaching school."
"Twilight's a great multitasker," Pinkie said. "She can handle it, just like me! I can have this conversation and watch Surprise on the seesaw at the same time!" Pinkie Pie held her breath as she grunted and strained. Fluttershy and Rarity watched in horror as one of her eyes drifted off in one direction until it was pointed directly at the playground. The other eye stayed fixed on her friends, and the two stayed in their separated position even as Pinkie allowed herself to breathe normally again.
"... Pinkie Pie, I would pay good bits to not have to see you do that ever again."
"Rarity, you really should be watching this."
"I did watch it, and I wish I could forget."
"Heads up!"
"Heads up what?" There wasn't enough time for Rarity to look up before a white blur fell from the sky and landed right on her lap. Grateful for the soft landing, the little pony with a bandage across her nose stood up and began brushing herself off. "D-dear me, Finesse?! What in Equestria is going on? Where did you come from?"
Finesse looked up at her mother for a moment before looking up at the sky.
"But how did you get up there?"
"I told them not to!" Willow came running with her little sister and Surprise in tow. Surprise was the only little pony in the group that didn't look absolutely horrified. "Finesse said she could go higher in the air than Surprise, so Surprise helped her drop a big rock on the seesaw!"
"Oh my!" Fluttershy got to her hooves the best she could and went to her children. "You two aren't hurt, are you?"
"Wew owkay," Maple said, huddling up with her sister beneath her mother's wings. "Wew went owver dere." Maple pointed a little hoof at a tree no less than thirteen yards away from the playground. Fluttershy shot a glare at Rarity and Pinkie Pie, the latter of the two too busy chatting with her child about pastries to notice.
"W-what?" Rarity herself was busy brushing dirt out of Finesse's mane, which the little filly passively allowed to happen as she watched Pinkie and Surprise talking.
"Why does this always happen when we come to the park?" Fluttershy was acting uncharacteristically cross, but when it came to the well being of her children all bets were off. She fixed her icy stare at Rarity, demanding some acknowledgement of her plight.
"This doesn't always happen when we come to the park." Rarity never liked confronting Fluttershy when she got like this. "I mean... this particular thing doesn't always happen."
"Last week they all almost feel out of a tree, and the week before that they almost get run over by a carriage, and before that it was that thing with the bees! And that's just the ones I still remember!" Fluttershy had been purging such events from her memory, but she knew she'd written them down somewhere just in case. Rarity wanted to say something in her defense, but her ability to successfully argue a point hadn't really been present today. She doubted Fluttershy would even listen even if there was a good explanation. "Come on girls, we're going home." Fluttershy began to storm out of the park as fast as she could with her bulging belly while Willow followed right at her tail and Maple following right at Willow's tail. Rarity kept brushing while Pinkie Pie looked up to see Fluttershy and company receding into the distance.
"She's leaving early again? Fluttershy sure is busy!"
"Yes, she has her own business to worry about." Rarity was the one who had a child soaring through the air without so much as a single wing on her back. She looked down at Finesse, who from her expression didn't appear to realize all the trouble she'd caused. There was only one possible consolation for the whole debacle. "Did you win again?"
"Yes, I won." Finesse spoke slowly and quietly, which was her way of attempting to talk like a grown pony. The effect of maturity was somewhat diminished by how slow she chose to go, but her determination to get every word out like her mother or father was admirable. "Can we get ice cream?"
"Icy cweam? I lub icy cweam!" Suddenly Surprise was on Rarity's lap too. "Icy cweam! Icy cweam! Icy cweam!"
"W-well, you'll have to ask your mo-"
"Ice cream! Ice cream! Ice cream!" Pinkie was really pushing the limits of Rarity's lap space now.
"All this victory is going to make us fat..."
"Iwma not gonna be fyat ecause gwandpaw saiys I gots my mommy's mertaberism!" Surprise was the kind of child that was always heard but hardly even understood. At least her mother could keep up with and unravel her sentences.
"And you've got your papa's appetite!" Pinkie said, putting Surprise on her own lap while still sharing Rarity's lap with Finesse. "And his wings and his snoring, but that's not the point right now! The point is ice cream!"
"Icy cweam!"
"Please?" Finesse asked, looking up with her puppy-dog eyes. As soon as Rarity made the mistake of looking into them, she instantly changed her tune. As if under powerful hypnotism, she forgot all about her inhibitions as she cracked a huge smile and got all warm and fuzzy inside.
"How many scoops do you want?"
There were general cheers of approval.
The bright ringing of the school bell sounded through the halls of the schoolhouse.
"Well, that's recess. I'll see you all back here in thirty minutes."
The first half of the first day had gone by rather quickly for Taboo. Twilight had done a lot of talking, more than she usually does since nopony with the confidence to stop her was around. All the fillies and colts in her class immediately sprang up and started towards the door. Taboo hung back, choosing to stay in her seat in the back corner. Pumpkin and Pound were out the door with the others, leaving her alone with Venom as Twilight erased the blackboard. Their teacher glanced behind her for a moment, noticing the two fillies that hadn't run outside yet.
"Ve-Locusta, Taboo, what're you sitting around for?" Twilight said with a smile. She gestured towards the door. "Go out and get some exercise. It's important for little ponies like you to be active."
"I don't know what a recess is." Venom had learned all sorts of things today, the sort of things normal fillies would've known already. She came off as naive but charming to anyone who didn't know the changeling underneath her elegant facade.
"It means you can go outside and play." Twilight gave a frank answer, which appeared to ring true with Venom. The young changeling hopped up and made a break for the door before Twilight could change her mind.
"Make sure to come back after the next bell!" Twilight wasn't sure Venom heard her but figured she would figure it out eventually. She certainly had the right attitude for school, if not the practical skills for it. Twilight turned her attention to Taboo, who was still lingering at her desk. She put down her eraser and walked over to where she was, taking a seat next to her. "Anxious about making new friends?"
"... I don't think they like me." Taboo stared down at her desk, her ears drooping low. "They're always whispering and looking at me."
"Do you know what they're whispering about?"
"About me... I don't know, I was trying not to listen."
Twilight figured Taboo's excellent hearing was a potential double-edged sword in more than one regard. She could already see the cloud of doubt surrounding Taboo and all the questions that were starting to form in her mind. School wasn't the kind of environment that was going to let them dance around the issue for much longer, especially if the other children were openly hostile. Whispers were one thing, but Twilight considered keeping Taboo inside for recess for a brief moment when she thought about what else could happen.
She shook off that idea. Taboo didn't need anything else separating her from the others. If anything, she needed to get outside before they realized she wasn't around. Twilight had faith that at least some of the other fillies and colts would warm up to her, but she found it hard to get her hopes up too high. Sure enough, the first day revealed the mountain of work that needed to be done.
"Pumpkin, Pound, and Venom are all your friends. I'm sure they'll also help you make new ones." Twilight kind of wished those ponies were around to back her up, but there was no blaming them for just being kids. "I bet they're waiting for you outside right now. Go on ahead, alright?"
"... Alright." Taboo didn't feel very gung-ho about all of this. Of course she'd been nervous all along, but she was just a bit optimistic about maybe making some new friends. Now that she'd seen all the fillies and colts in her class, that optimism wasn't around. Twilight had done nothing to deny that her classmates might dislike her, and somehow she found that worrisome. There were questions forming in her mind, questions Twilight couldn't anticipate as Taboo walked out of the room.
Taboo shuffled towards the exit slowly; she wasn't in any kind of hurry to get outside. Her mother and father weren't there to protect her, and she wanted to know so badly what it was they had always been protecting her from. She knew the way other ponies always looked in their direction, the way strangers would speak in hushed tones whenever they were out in public. That was the unusual thing about her life, Taboo had come to believe. Now she had a point of reference, and she'd been keeping track of everything that happened in the past year. There was no two ways around it: Taboo was fundamentally different.
Taboo's own sister was such a different pony from her. She had wondered about why she appeared so different from the first time she saw the tiny filly, with her bright eyes and feathered wings. Taboo didn't have those things, and Taboo realized she was the only one who didn't have those things. She wanted to know why, but she was too afraid to ask. Actually, she was probably more afraid to know at all. She wasn't so young and naive that she couldn't have noticed how different she was, and perhaps she hadn't been for a while now. Her parents said nothing about it and all of her friends and loved ones said nothing about it, so she never had any reason to think it was terribly unusual.
Her classmates weren't so reserved with their comments, even if they kept them to hushed whisper. Taboo couldn't count the number of times she had heard the word "wings" whispered from across the room. She felt bad about lying to Twilight about it, but deep down inside she felt like she was being lied to as well. Nopony had told her she was different, not to her face. Nopony had explained if it was a good or bad thing. Nopony felt like the right pony to ask, but Taboo was reaching her breaking point. She'd held on to her curiosity in the face of starting school, but now that she'd arrived she felt like that was a mistake.
Her mother had said she would be going to school to learn, and she was indeed learning. As she stepped out into the schoolyard, she was graced with an interesting spectacle on the playground.
"Yeeeeeeeooowch!"
Some colt that Taboo recognized from class was crying out in pain, and the truly remarkable thing about the source of his pain was that it appeared to be that Venom was biting his leg. She was still in her disguise, but nonetheless she had her little teeth clasped firmly around the colt's foreleg just beneath the knee. It looked painful.
More than that, there was a crowd of ponies gathered around the two. Pumpkin and Pound were there too, standing just a few inches behind Venom. Taboo realized she'd arrived right at the climax of events. As Venom released the crying colt from her jaws, Taboo got a sinking feeling about what was coming next.
"You bit me!" the colt yelled between his tears. His panic didn't merit a particularly articulate response, but there was one more pony who was even less interested in using words to effectively communicate their feelings.
"Raaah!" Venom lunged forward as if to bite him again, but luckily Pound and Pumpkin bounded forward and caught her just in time. Taboo would've been lying if she said she'd never seen Venom so worked up, but this was the first time she'd ever attacked somepony like this. Concerned for her friend, Taboo found herself flying down onto the playground. "Lemme at him! Lemme at him!"
"You're crazy!" The bitten colt retreated backwards into the crowd, which in turn retreated away from him lest they be attacked out of association.
"Take it back!" Venom yelled. Nopony noticed Taboo touching down just on the outskirts of the argument. "Take it back or I'll bite you again!"
The colt did not take it back. He made a break for it out of the crowd, at which point the crowd also began to dash off in different directions. Venom struggled harder to get free and make good on her promise to enact more violence upon the colt, but she was outnumbered by the twins. When the dust settled, the only other pony remaining was Taboo.
"Taboo?" Pumpkin released Venom, causing the filly to fall flat on her face and take Pound with her to the ground. "How long have you been there?"
"I... I just saw Venom bite that colt."
"So you didn't hear what he said?" Venom was up on her hooves without skipping a beat. Taboo noticed that she looked a little more dusted up than one little tumble would cause. Apparently there was more to the struggle than just the bite. "Don't listen to him! He's a big jerk!"
"Venom..."
"And I told him to stop saying those things, but he didn't listen! "
"Venom."
"So I bit him on the leg to make him shut up and I w-"
"Venom!" Pound finally got the changeling's attention. She glared at him for a moment, but immediately remembered the situation. Her head drooped low, realizing she'd just made a bigger mess than before. Pound could tell she felt bad enough right now, so he turned his attention to Taboo. "Don't listen to her. She just can't take a joke is all."
"... What did he say?" Taboo wasn't really sure she wanted to know; however, she just wanted a little confirmation. She wanted to know one way or the other. Nopony spoke up. Pound refused to look her in the eye. Pumpkin looked like she was ready to start crying. Venom didn't lift her head. That was more than enough for Taboo to put the pieces together. She took a hard seat on the ground. "So it's true... I'm some kind of monster..."
"No!" Venom sprang back to life. "It's not true! Monsters are big and scary, but you're not! You're my best friend and not a monster and you're a pony like the rest of the ponies are ponies! I know you are!" Without a bit of warning, Venom ditched her disguise and transformed into Taboo.
"V-Venom?!" Pumpkin and Pound did their best to make sure nopony around would see, but luckily nopony was really looking in their direction anymore. "What are you doing? Change back!"
"See! I can't turn into monsters! I can only turn into ponies! You're just a pony and that colt was stupid for saying those things and he's a jerk and and and..." Venom began to cry, warbling the rest of what she was trying to get out. Taboo had never seen Venom cry, and she had certainly never seen herself cry. She couldn't help but think she looked pathetic, and it only took that much to get her to start crying as well. Venom was crying because of all the terrible things that colt had said and Taboo was crying because she was confused. Pound and Pumpkin were crying a bit too, but they still managed to talk Venom into transforming back before a teacher came out of the school building. Regardless of why they were crying, that's what they were all doing as the teacher galloped over.
"This isn't your grandpa's house, you tapeless excuse for a half-eaten sugar glider's mother! You look like a pumpkin on the back of a wagon out there! I wanna see some dogs turning their squirrels over! Hussle pony, hussle!"
"I gotta say, Chevron is in rare form today," Cloudchaser said, a towel draped over her sweaty shoulders and a cold bottle of water in her hoof. Rainbow Dash was seated next to her in a similar manner as both of them watched Snowflake struggle to finish his laps while an elderly pegasus shouted at him from the side of the track. "You think he's off his meds?"
"This isn't amateur hour at the oyster shucking derby, front nose! Put yer higgery diggery into it!"
"You think he was ever on them?" Rainbow Dash's question was a valid once. Nopony could understand what Chevron was on about even on a good day, which today might qualify as in all actuality. Aside from Snowflake who always lagged behind during laps, everypony else in Dash's squad was in tip-top shape. With the summer show circuit just on the horizon, they were in a good position to secure some substantial stage time with the rest of the team. Even a year after their Spring Training as Wonderbolt hopefuls, that novelty feeling of being new recruits was starting to wear off with the notion that just a little ways away there's a group of ponies going through what they all went through last year. Compared to Spring Training, getting yelled at by Chevron was nothing.
"Didn't your mother ever teach you the difference between the bread on your plate and the Celestia loving shine of the sun off the pole in your rump? Why I oughta..."
"Is it just me, or is Chevron especially non-sequitur today?" Thunderlane said as he came up behind his two female comrades. "It's like he's so angry, he can't remember what he's trying to say."
"My heart goes out to Snowflake on days like these," Cloudchaser said, waving her towel at the muscular stallion as he whizzed by. "Don't take what he's saying to heart!"
"How could somepony?" Rainbow Dash asked. "He never says anything that makes sense."
"He once told me watching me flap my wings was like staring into the face of a single mother of two in the canned food isle on a Thursday. I dunno why, but I actually still feel kind of bad about that." Thunderlane hadn't even been flying at the time when Chevron had said so. In fact, they weren't even at practice. Thunderlane had been waiting outside of Spitfire's office to report in on daily exercises when Chevron just passed by and said it. There had been no prompting of any kind, not even brief eye contact. There wasn't even any evidence that the statement had been derogatory, but Thunderlane felt it all the same.
"Sometimes I think he's hitting on me, but then starts talking like he's my father or something but kind of still like he's hitting on me."
"Not into old guys?" Rainbow Dash snickered a bit to herself, even if the image did make her wanna throw up a little.
"Maybe one day." Sometimes Cloudchaser said things that were just too alarming. Before either Thunderlane or Rainbow Dash could point out just how wrong that sounded, she got up and starting towards the lockers. "I'm gonna get a refill on this before Snowflake finishes."
"Good luck." Rainbow Dash watched her go, waiting until she was out of earshot for sure before turning to Thunderlane. "Just do me one favor and never ever sleep with her."
"I don't even wanna sleep near her," Thunderlane said, having sworn off anything even remotely romantic where Cloudchaser was concerned. He knew her too well for that. "At least she seems to have fun."
"I guess somepony on the squad has to be the object of desire."
"Still sore about those magazine folks?" Thunderlane asked, referencing an event that happened only a couple of weeks prior. In summary, Rainbow Dash wasn't too keen on having her picture taken from certain angles. Spitfire had tried to punish Rainbow Dash by threatening to take away anymore magazine interviews, but Rainbow Dash had been so steamed over the whole thing that she took the offer before Spitfire could renegotiate. In the end, Rainbow Dash still had to do interviews and the photographers had to be warned to mind the boundaries. "You're a rising star, Dash. Ponies are gonna be interested in the kind of stuff."
"You sound disappointed..."
"Hu-wh-no! C'mon, don't turn this on me!"
"Your romantic life has been kind of drab. Maybe you've got a secret crush on me?"
"You sound like my mom..."
"Your mom asks you if you have a crush on her?" Rainbow Dash snickered, since she knew full well what he really meant. She let Thunderhead glare at her, sensing she'd managed to strike a chord. "You gotta remember, I am a mom."
"Fame has done nothing for my love life. Actually, it might've hurt it. I'm too famous for the ponies I already know and not famous enough for the ones who don't."
"Well, whatever." Rainbow Dash wasn't one for doling out advice on that kind of topic. "If you want 'em, go get 'em I guess. Don't let fame get in your way."
"Excuse me, Rainbow Dash?" The conversation came to a halt as one of the ponies from the front desk approached the pair from behind. The mare looked somewhat frazzled, glancing awkwardly back and forth between the ground and Rainbow Dash. "It's... well, Ms. Scootaloo is here."
"Didn't I tell you all to just send her home when she shows up like this?"
"Yes, but... the thing is, Mrs. Dash." She seemed to be having trouble getting the words out. "She said something about the schoolhouse... and, uh... a riot?"
"A what?!" Rainbow Dash shot up from her seat, her towel and water bottle flying in different directions. She rushed the stammering mare and began shaking her. "Why? Why why why?!"
"S-s-something a-a-about T-t-taboo?"
Faster than anypony could bat an eye, Rainbow Dash was gone from the arena. It didn't matter how tired she was from practice; there was something important to attend to, incredibly important.
There was a general uproar in Twilight's classroom, or rather there was still a general uproar in the classroom. Despite her best efforts, she had been unsuccessful in quieting the mass of concerned parents gathered where her students were supposed to be. Today's events would've been considered a failure even if it wasn't the first day, and even by first day standards this was a complete debacle. Almost immediately after the incident on the playground, concerned parents from all over Ponyville had flooded in to protect their offspring. Although the official story of Locusta, played by Venom of course, biting the young colt had been related to everypony, they had picked another student in the class to direct their anger towards.
"I knew it was a bad idea to let that freak into school!"
"How could anypony let this happen?"
"We should've anticipated this from the start!"
"Monsters don't belong with the rest of civilized society. It's just not right!"
"Please, everypony, settle down!" Twilight was trying her darndest to take back control, but so far all she'd managed to do was prevent the disgruntled crowd from ranking up to an angry mob. She was the only level head in the room, as even some of the children were starting to add to the shouting uproar. Twilight had to have Scootaloo take Taboo off school grounds before heading out to retrieve Rainbow Dash. It was for Taboo's own good, but Twilight knew there was going to be one party bound to be considerably displeased to find Taboo was not in the school. Twilight had done the math, and the pony's arrival that she'd been equally hoping for and dreading came with an earsplitting bang as the door flung open and a rainbow streak gusted into the room. Silence followed in her wake, and only Rainbow Dash's heavy breathing could be heard. Twilight didn't need to be sitting in the audience to see that she was beyond pissed.
"... So, what'd I miss?" Casual as ever, Rainbow Dash took an offensive stance at the head of the classroom. As she had anticipated the worst, she had already counted on being up against the entire class of angry parents. The crowd wasn't so shocked by her entrance that they were hesitant to answer her question.
"Your pet monster attacked my son!" The mother of the bitten colt spoke up, unimpressed by Rainbow Dash's entrance. When word got out that the colt had been bitten, it had been this mare that had spread the word. She was to blame for the gathering Rainbow Dash saw before her. "We want her out of this school!"
"Is that so?" Rainbow Dash looked over at Twilight. The Princess shook her head, letting Rainbow Dash know that the mare's story didn't hold water. "He says Taboo bit him?"
"Are you calling my son a liar?"
"Hey, you're the one calling my daughter a monster!"
"Stop pretending that thing is your daughter," a father in the audience said. "It's disgusting."
"How's about speaking when spoken to, buddy?"
"Dash, we're not going to get anywhere if you don't cool your temper." Twilight tried to get her friend to simmer down a little, but Rainbow Dash was the dictionary definition of hotheaded. The pegasus shot her a look that indicated she wasn't going to hesitate turning on her if she got it in her head. Twilight realized calling Rainbow Dash in was, although morally the right thing to do, a huge mistake. Rainbow Dash was ready to match the crowd's anger, and that was not at all what this situation needed.
"This is pointless! That freak should be expelled!"
"Hey, you still haven't proved that Taboo did anything wrong!" Rainbow Dash shot back at the crowd.
"We know she did it!"
"You don't know bupkis!"
Just like that the room was in an uproar again. The only difference was this time there was somepony yelling back at the crowd and egging them on, which was exactly what Twilight had tried so hard to prevent. She couldn't battle the crowd and calm down Rainbow Dash at the same time, not without a miracle; however, Twilight was just desperate and angry enough herself to make a miracle happen. Nopony saw her horn light up, but after the resulting flash they immediately noticed the effect. They tried to yell at Twilight in protest, but that was now impossible with their newly muted voices. Twilight knew she'd just put a little band-aid on a deep wound, but the silence was very nice.
"Well, it would seem diplomacy is out of the question," Twilight said, being the only one who could say anything. Rainbow Dash was still attempting to yell at her, but the rest of the crowd had simply resigned to listen to the Princess. "I know you're all concerned, but the official story is the colt was bitten by Locusta, not Taboo. Now, if anypony would like to comment on that one at a time, you can have your voices back." Twilight scanned the crowd, looking out over the sea of frustrated parents. They looked ready to speak like adults again, so Twilight returned their voices with her magic.
"Look, does it really matter who did the biting?" A father in the front row was the first to speak up after the parents had confirmed their voices were back. "We all know it was her fault anyway."
Rainbow Dash attempted to shout at the stallion, but found Twilight hadn't returned her voice.
"According to the children we initially asked the bite came about after an argument about Taboo got physical, but that is the only capacity in which Taboo was involved. Taboo was still in the classroom when the argument in question took place." Twilight now had the crowd at a loss for what to say next, so she proceeded with the finishing blow. "Locusta will be appropriately punished for her actions while our class takes steps to make sure something like this never happens again, and that is the end result of this incident. It will not be used as a podium from which to smear Taboo. If you have a problem with your child being in the same class as her, you may see the principal at a different time about transferring your student to another class."
"That will not be necessary, Ms. Sparkle." Every head in the room turned towards the door. A staunch looking unicorn stallion with a navy blue tie marched into the room, all the while scowling at everypony as he made his way to the front of the room.
"Principal Walnut?" The Principal didn't seem concerned with Twilight, or the silent Rainbow Dash, but rather chose to immediately turn his attention to the crowd.
"In all my years as an educator, I have never had a more appalling start to the school year. Schoolyard scuffles on the first day are not uncommon, but outrage of this size is completely unheard of. I will not have this school made into a spectacle. I only wanted the parents of the two ponies involved in this incident to sort this out, but I see you all took the first opportunity you could to turn this into a circus.
"Well, this witch trial is over. I will have no further discussion of Mrs. Dash and her child's involvement in this incident. Locusta will be punished, and as for an apology..." Walnut turned towards the door. "You may come in, Mrs. Martina."
"Oh, thank you good sir!" Yet another unicorn walked into the room, but this time it was a female in a gaudy dress that would've been over the top even in Canterlot. Neither Twilight or Rainbow Dash had any idea who this pony was supposed to be. "I was quite shocked to hear the news that my little Locusta did something so horrid."
"You're Locusta's mother?" Twilight spoke up without thinking, but only because she knew who Locusta really was. If Martina was claiming to be her mother, then her true identity could only be Queen Chrysalis. Martina glanced over at Twilight and Rainbow Dash briefly, giving them a sickening little smile as if to confirm their suspicions.
"Oh, she is such a delicate little flower, my Locusta!" Chrysalis was a pretty good actor, or she was at least winning over the crowd of previously enraged parents. It appeared they responded well to anypony who looked like they came from a respectable family. "Being flung so suddenly into public life must've been such a trail for her! But, she must learn that actions taken in fear have consequences. I'm terribly sorry we caused such an uproar, but I do hope the rest of the school year will pass without incident."
"Does anypony have any complaints?" Walnut asked, but the crowd just shook their heads. They weren't so quick to condemn somepony they saw as one of their own, but the irony was not lost on Rainbow Dash and Twilight. "Very well then. You should all return home and make sure you think about how we can make the second day of school nothing short of a success." As per the principal's request, parents and children filed out of the room one by one until only the principal, Martina, Twilight, and Rainbow Dash were left. While Twilight restored Rainbow Dash's voice, Walnut closed the door and heaved a sigh.
"I think you handled that well, sir," Twilight said, misreading why the principal was sighing.
"Miss Chrysalis, you may drop the act now if you like."
"Ugh, fiiine." Chrysalis dropped her disguise, dress and all. "I gotta say, this has turned out to be a more exciting day than I anticipated."
"P-principal Walnut? You know tha-"
"I know everything, Ms. Sparkle," Walnut said. "I observed the whole incident from my office, including Locusta transforming into Taboo in broad daylight."
"She did what?" Twilight knew Venom wasn't too bright, but she did have a good amount of common sense. Perhaps the whole incident was a bit more traumatic for everypony than she thought. "Why did she do that?"
"A question for the filly herself." Principal Walnut took a deep breath in and then sighed it back out. "If it weren't for Locusta's butler, I would've been unable to get Queen Chrysalis to come here and settle things. I wouldn't call our situation fortunate, but it could honestly be much, much worse."
"Thanks for sticking up for us," Rainbow Dash said, extending her hoof to shake with Walnut. "I didn't realize we had an ally up at the top."
"Every colt and filly deserves an education," Walnut said whilst exchanging the hoofshake with Dash. "The real monster, Mrs. Dash, is ignorance."
"Hmph, as touching as this is I really must retrieve my spawn and get going," Chrysalis said, breaking up the party.
"That's it then? You're just gonna make one appearance and buzz off?" Rainbow Dash asked, noticing that Chrysalis appeared to take offense to her turn of phrase. "I know we were enemies in the past, but now that our daughters are friends-"
"A trifling detail, really." Chrysalis was about as uninterested in whatever Rainbow Dash wanted to propose as a changeling could be. "All I will say is this: I am grateful, if not confused, for your tolerance of my daughter despite knowing what she is; however, ponies are not supposed to know when changelings are about. This is a simple rule and Venom broke it, and she will be punished for this."
"You're not going to take her out of school, are you?" Rainbow Dash wasn't about to let Taboo lose any of what precious little friends she had in her class.
"Ugh, you reek of genuine concern," Chrysalis said with a dramatic roll of her eyes. "No, I will not be taking her out of school. In actuality punishment for being discovered by ponies should work itself out naturally, but since Venom lucked out and did not suffer that fate it just feels troublesome for me to punish her for it..."
"Talk about 'genuine concern.'"
"So, I will settle for just punishing her for biting that colt on the playground. That punishment will be left for the school to decide upon." Chrysalis transformed back into her disguise and turned towards the door. "So, Mr. Walnut, I would be grateful if you would outline the punishment for my little Locusta as you accompany me out."
"Very well, Mrs. Martina." Walnut started out with her, but turned around to deliver one last message to Rainbow Dash and Twilight. "I may be an unprejudiced individual, but I am this school's principal first. If all of this becomes too much of a distraction, my options will be limited." With that he proceeded out the door, leaving the two mares behind to meditate on his promise.
"... Well, at least he's realistic." Rainbow Dash wasn't sure what else she could say. He was just playing by the rules as well as he could in his awkward position, so she couldn't fault him. "I wonder what his story is..."
"I don't think now is the time to get into that," Twilight said, bringing a very important matter to light for Rainbow Dash.
There was a knock on Fluttershy's cottage door, one she'd been expecting for a while now. Much to Rainbow Dash's surprise, is was Fluttershy herself who opened up the door. Instead of inviting her in, she stepped out and closed the door behind her. Based on the look on her face, she didn't have any good news.
"She's around back." Fluttershy slowly led the way around the back of the cottage. There, in the shade of a tree, Taboo sat looking out towards the Everfree. Rainbow Dash really didn't want to think about what she might be thinking about, but in a far greater capacity she needed to know in order to comfort her daughter. She thanked Fluttershy and left her behind to wing her way over to Taboo. The little filly had heard her coming, having heard her knock on Fluttershy's door. When it was quiet and she had time to concentrate, there wasn't much she couldn't hear. Even sitting so far from it, she could hear things rustling and moving in the Everfree.
"... Hey squirt." Rainbow Dash took a seat next to her. "Looks like we need to talk."
"... Mom?"
"Yeah?"
"Am... I a monster?"
"Of course not." Rainbow Dash struggled to remain calm, afraid that getting to excited might upset Taboo. Still, she couldn't help but put a hoof around her and pull her close to wrap her wing around her. Taboo leaned into her and embraced her as well. Even without being so close, she could hear how quickly her mother's heart was pounding. It was clear to Taboo that she was upset as well, even if she wasn't showing it.
"Then why am I so different from everypony?"
"Everypony is different from everypony else." It was a lackluster response, even if it was true. "Some ponies are unicorns, others are pegasi or earth ponies. Someponies have blue manes, some ponies don't. Everypony is different."
"But.. why?" Taboo wasn't satisfied yet. "Was I always like this?"
"You've always been you."
"Since I was born?"
"... Yeah, ever since you were born." Rainbow Dash realized that even if her statement was probably true, it lacked one vital detail; however, she decided that Taboo didn't need to know about that quite yet. "Everypony has to be someway, squirt."
"But..."
"But what?" Rainbow Dash asked, but she could already feel Taboo fidgeting with her wings. "So your wings are different."
"And my ears..."
"And your ears."
"And my eyes..."
"And your eyes."
"And I can-"
"Taboo, you can't focus on all the differences." Rainbow Dash certainly didn't want to. "You're not a monster just because you're a pony that's a little more different than the rest. Differences are important, Taboo. If everypony was exactly the same the world would be pretty boring, don't you think?"
"But that's why all the other ponies are always whispering about me, aren't they? Because I look different."
"Taboo, you're a little young to have realized it yet, but how you look doesn't really count for much." That was really all there was to say on the matter. What it all boiled down to was that ponies should not judge a book by its cover. It was beyond Rainbow Dash to teach the entire town this lesson at this juncture, but there was one pony who was willing to listen. "But you should know better than anypony that it's not what you see on the outside that matters, but what you're like on the inside. I mean, you're friends with Venom, right? She can look like any pony she wants to, but no matter what she looks like she's still your friend. Not many ponies have the kind of friend that would start a fight with somepony who was talking poorly of their friend. No matter what she looks like she's your good friend because she sees you for who you really are: somepony special."
"Somepony special?" Taboo perked up just a little as things began to make sense to her.
"Did you ever stop to consider how awesome it is that you're so different?" Rainbow Dash gave Taboo a little noogie. "Some ponies try their whole lives to stand out and be different from everypony else, but you stand out just because you're you. For better or worse, ponies are gonna notice. You've just gotta be tough, but if today proved anything it's that you're not alone in this. You've still got ponies who love you no matter what. You know that, right?"
"I know that... but... I was hoping to make new friends." Maybe it was selfish of her, but she still wanted everypony else to like her.
"That's the funny thing about friendship, squirt," Rainbow Dash said. "If somepony doesn't want to be your friend, that's their loss. If you just keep trying, you'll get there one day. For now, you've already got some friends worth having. One day everypony will learn to see in you what they do."
"You think so?"
"I know so," Rainbow Dash said, hugging Taboo closer. "Now how about we get home? It'll be dark soon, and believe it or you've still got to go to school tomorrow."
"I wish we could do the first day over again..."
"Life doesn't usually give you do-overs, squirt. You can't make tomorrow better by wishing yesterday was different."
The pair sat in silence for a little while longer. They both realized how happy they were to see today come to a close, even the only result was that tomorrow was going to be another challenge. Taboo was that much more prepared, having heard from her mother that there was nothing to gain from worrying what she looked like. She appeared as she did, and in her mother's eyes that was all there was to appearances. When she really thought about it, there were plenty of ponies who had been her friends even before she realized how different she was. In the end, being so different hardly seemed like such a big deal after all. Just as her mother had said, she started to feel a bit of pride in the wings on her back. There was no denying how different she was, but in a strange turn of events she no longer wished to deny it.
She realized she had always loved those differences, even before she realized them. When she saw how other ponies reacted to those differences, she had let doubt cloud those feelings. It had taken the kindness of the ponies near her to remind her that a true friend will be by your side no matter what you look like, and now her only regret was having forgotten something so basic. She shouldn't put too much stock in what ponies who can only see what's on the outside. If that was all they could see, then she didn't need them.
The flight back home passed quickly and silently. By the time Rainbow Dash and Taboo arrived back at the house, the sun was already dipping behind the horizon. It was much later than both of them should've been coming home, so of course when they opened the door they caught Thunderhead pacing back and forth in the den.
"We're back!"
"You two okay?" Thunderhead wasn't much in the mood for joking around. He had heard about what had happened from Scootaloo after she managed to come back from Cloudsdale. He had wanted to storm down to the schoolhouse himself, but he figured Rainbow Dash could be enough of a hothead for the both of them. More than that, he couldn't leave Aurora alone at home. "What ended up happening?"
"Everything is fine now," Rainbow Dash said, giving him a peck on the cheek before walking past him. "Don't you have to get to work?"
"You really think I believe nothing happened?"
"There was a lot of angry parents, then Chrysalis and the Principal calmed them down, and then me and Taboo had a little chat," Rainbow Dash said, giving him an abridged account of things. Unfortunately, this only served to confuse him even further. Seeing as he wasn't going to get anywhere with his wife, he instead turned to Taboo.
"Are you really okay?" Even if he wasn't clear on the details, as long as Taboo was okay he could at least relax a little bit. He just needed to hear it from her that she was going to be okay.
"Yes, I'll be okay," Taboo said, and she meant it. Even if she was still a little nervous about going back to school, part of her couldn't help but think things would be better tomorrow. After the day she just had, she couldn't even think about how it could possibly be worse. "I just feel bad that Venom got in trouble because of me."
"Well, you shouldn't bite people no matter what they s-" Thunderhead stopped in the middle of his sentence. He just looked down at Taboo with wide eyes. Neither Rainbow Dash nor Taboo could figure out what had him so perplexed, that is until Rainbow Dash turned around and took a good look at Taboo for herself.
"Oh my gosh?! Ah, uh, Taboo!" It was hard for her to put her thoughts into words. Instead, she just opted to point. Of course, to Taboo it just like her mother was pointing right at her.
"W-what is it?"
"Sister, you have it!" Aurora fluttered down from what could've only been somewhere up near the ceiling and landed neatly on top of Taboo's back. "You have it now!"
"Have what?" Taboo had to see herself for herself, but she didn't know what she was looking for. She didn't feel any different, and from what she could tell she didn't look any different than normal either. "What's going on?"
"When did it happen?" Thunderhead asked.
"Must've been after we talked because she certainly didn't have it when I first showed up," Rainbow Dash replied; however, Taboo still had no clue what they were going on about. "And to think, we almost missed it!"
"I'm missing it!" Taboo shouted at them, not that they seemed to be listening.
"No, you have it, sister." Aurora jumped down from her sister. "It's pretty." The little filly suddenly poked her butt which was a significant surprise for Taboo. Aurora usually didn't observe socially acceptable physical boundaries, but butt-touching was not her normal MO.
"Hey! Cut that out! What are you..." Taboo found herself staring at her own rear end. Something that was not there before could be seen, and it explained everypony's behavior. "... A cutie mark?!" She realized her mother was absolutely right about when she must've gotten it, meaning she had regrettably missed the exact moment it appeared; however, given today's events and the mark's appearance it wasn't hard to figure out why.
Now Taboo was marked with a crimson heart with a pair of bat wings folded in front of it. It was simple, but the message was unmistakable. She felt all giddy inside, even though she hadn't even not had a cutie mark long enough to even want one all that bad. It didn't diminish the excitement of the moment and actually served to make her feel much more proud about it. There wasn't anypony else in her entire class with a cutie mark yet, which meant she had won the race to get a cutie mark by an indisputable margin.
"Cutie mark, cutie mark, cutie mark!" Taboo began to frolic in a little circle, achieving a simultaneous admiring of her mark and getting the ants out of her pants. Aurora joined in the chant and pranced right behind her.
"Alright, now I have to know everything that happened today," Thunderhead said, turning to his wife again. "I am pleased to see everything has ended well, though."
"You must've also realized that today was a long day," Rainbow Dash said. "So could it please wait until tomorrow?"
"Taboo! Wake up or you're gonna be late!"
Taboo's eyes shot open. A shock ran up her spine as she literally jumped from her bed and into the air. She realized she'd willingly let herself go back to sleep at least four times now, which meant there was almost no time left for her to get down to school. With a flap of her wings, she zoomed over to her mirror. Sure enough, her bedhead was out of control. She brushed it furiously into submission before putting her hairband in. The next step was to check her tail, which was also looking like a rat's nest. After a vigorous brushing her tail too looked nice and smooth. Not wasting a second, she dropped her hairbrush and flew out of her room. She zipped through the hallway and then turned towards the bathroom.
*wham *
There was a door in her way. With one hoof holding her nose she knocked a frantic rhythm onto the door.
"Aurora! Hurry up! I'm going to be late!"
There was a brief silence before she heard the toilet flush. Taboo danced in place for a second, impatiently waiting for her sister to open up the door. It was another full two minutes before the knob finally turned an the little filly emerged.
"Good morning!" Of course, she was all smiles.
"Geez, what took you so long?" Taboo went right past her and right to the bathroom counter. She set to brushing her teeth with unprecedented urgency. Aurora followed her back into the bathroom and flew up next to her. She too began to brush her teeth, but at a much more reasonable pace. Taboo rolled her eyes and spit into the sink. "Must be nice not having to go to school."
"Awha go wiwoo doe."
"Huh?"
Aurora spit into the sink. "I wanna go with you though!"
"Why would you want to do that?"
"Because I love you!"
"Ugh! I don't have time for this," Taboo said as she flew out of the bathroom. "I'm going to be late!"
"Buh-bye!" Aurora waved her off before resuming her teeth brushing. Taboo winged her way down the stairs, through the den, past Tank, and into the kitchen. She landed in one of the unoccupied seats with a bowl of cereal set out before it. Without so much as a good morning to either her mother or father seated on either side of her, she set to work wolfing down her meal.
"You're going to have to get used to getting up this early," Rainbow Dash said with a mouthful of toast in her mouth. "It's already summer, but I'm still shaking you down just to get a reaction out of you. You're less of a morning pony than your father, honestly."
"Not that you wake up all that easy," Thunderhead said with a yawn. Unlike the rest of his family, he was preparing to go to bed for the morning. "Just wait until my new assignment kicks in and then we can see who really is the best morning pony."
"Yeah, yeah, whatever." Rainbow Dash rose from the table and headed towards the door. "Remember that I'm in today's show, so I won't be home until later, Taboo. Remember to do your homework and make sure Aurora doesn't give all of her dinner to Tank."
"Okay!"
"And babe, please don't fall asleep until you've taken Aurora to her playdate."
"I'll get it done."
"Awesome," Rainbow Dash said as she threw her saddlebags on. "Then I'll see you all later!" With that, she turned into a rainbow streak out the door. Taboo figured that if she were as fast as her mother, she'd never be late for anything. Then again, she figured if she was that fast it'd just give the kids at school another reason to gawk at her. She turned her bowl up and drank all the milk out of it.
"Alright! I'm going!" She flew straight from the table to the door, picking up her own saddlebags on the way out. "Bye dad! I'll see you tonight!"
"Have a good day, kiddo."
"Good-bye Aurora!" Taboo yelled up the stairs.
"Wait!" The tiny pegasi emerged from the stairway, flapping her wings and making a reckless beeline for the door. "I love you!"
Taboo quickly ducked behind the front door and closed it behind her. A tiny thump shook the door. Taboo smirked a little, even if she felt just a tiny bit bad; however, she defended herself by thinking it was just a little payback. With no more business at her house, she stepped off the cloud and took to the cool morning air. She headed straight for town, dropping far beneath the clouds to fly just above the town's streets. There was plenty of movement in the early morning in Ponyville proper, just as there was everyday. Just as she expected, Taboo saw a few familiar faces as she approached the path by the fountain.
"Good morning!" she called down, stopping in midair to wave to the group of ponies below.
"Oh, good morning Taboo!" Time Turner called back up to her. Willow and Maple walked right behind him in single file, and also looked up to greet Taboo right behind their father. "You're a bit later than usual today! They say punctuality is the king of virtues, you know." His daughters nodded in agreement.
"Uh, sure?" Taboo wasn't exactly sure anypony said that, but it certainly sounded like the kind of thing he would say. Instead of mulling that over, Taboo turned her attention to the two stragglers in the group. "Good morning, Fluttershy!"
Fluttershy's ears perked up as she looked right and left a few times before realizing the voice had come from above. When she looked up, Taboo could see beneath her disheveled mane at those usual dark circles under her eyes.
"Oh, hello Taboo." Fluttershy managed a smile, which immediately ran away as the foal she was holding began to cry loudly. Despite her obvious fatigue, Fluttershy snapped into action without a second lapse. "There, there Soulmerry. Is my little lady cranky again this morning?" The foal's little pink face was wet with tears beneath her blonde mane, but that was hardly unusual. Unlike when dealing with her sisters, Fluttershy was having quite a bit of trouble with her latest child. She was no less doting and affectionate, but there was a very apparent lack of sleep and lack of any kind of rest really. It had been that way ever since Soulmerry came into the world, and Rainbow Dash often joked that the filly had not stopped crying since.
Taboo flew onwards, past the library and onto Sugarcube Corner where the path forked. From there it was a straight shot to the North Path, which was her destination for the moment. She took a hard left around the bakery and saw the road stretch before her. In the next moment, she couldn't see anything and felt a lot heavier.
"Ahh?! What?!" Taboo was going down, and she couldn't see why that was the case or where she was going to end up. There was certainly something latched onto her face, so she grabbed it to forced it off of her face. "F-Finesse?"
"Good morning." The filly was calm as ever.
"What are you-how did you?"
"We are crashing."
"Huh?! Aaah!" Taboo and Finesse flew straight into a bush. It wasn't the softest landing ever, but it was better than hitting the pavement head on. "Ooow..."
"You were late today," Finesse said. She seemed perfectly fine, having used Taboo to break her fall. She hopped out of the bush and brushed herself off. Taboo did her best to crawl out while to more ponies came running to the scene of the crime.
"Oh, darling! Are you okay?" Rarity said, sweeping Finesse up into her embrace. "Oh goodness, don't ever scare me like that again!"
"I wasn't scared! That was so cool!" Pinkie exclaimed. Her own daughter was posted up on her back, smiling just as wide as her mother. "She timed that perfectly! That was sooooo coooooool!"
"Kooooool!" Surprise couldn't argue with her mother's logic. "She e-flew ike daddy did!"
"My apologies, Taboo," Rarity said as she helped Taboo out of the bush. "I suppose she was waiting for you to fly by, since she was watching the window... and then she ran to the other one and before I could ask what was up she just jumped out!"
"That's... pretty gutsy." Taboo wasn't sure what else she could possibly say.
"Hey, aren't you kinda late?" Pinkie asked out of the blue. "Pound and Pumpkin left for the North Path, like, five minutes ago."
"Huh?! I'm that late?" Taboo didn't wait for a "yes" or a "no." She was back in the air and flying at full tilt towards the path's head. Sure enough, she could see Pound and Pumpkin waiting there for her. She kicked it into high gear and boosted forward right into an enormous red apple. Before she could even register what had even happened, Taboo found herself forced onto the ground for the third time this morning.
"What in tarnation?" Applejack was standing over her in the very next second. "You okay there, sugarcube?"
"Uugh... I'm sorry for hurting Aurora mommy... she's an innocent angel who wouldn't harm a fly..."
"What're ya talkin' about? I think she's a bit loopy."
"Eeyup..."
"... Ah... ah waaaah!" Applerose, who was sitting astride the shop cart began bawling uncontrollably. "T-Taboo got hurt!"
"For land's sake! You don't have to cry when other ponies get hurt!" Applejack wished her brother would scold his daughter every once and a while because having to do it herself made her feel like the villain. Perhaps if either of her parents were willing to be cross with their kid she wouldn't be such a crybaby. Of course, having Applejack yell at her only made Applerose cry even more.
Attracted by the sound of crying and the sight of their friend flying headlong into the bright red sign, Pound and Pumpkin rounded the cart to find their friend lying face up in a daze. Pound snickered a little, but Pumpkin dropped her bags and rushed to her side.
"Taboo! Are you alright?" Pumpkin picked up Taboo's shoulders and began shaking her. "Say something!"
"S-s-somethi-i-ing!" Taboo managed to say as her consciousness rattled back in. Fortunately Pumpkin stopped shaking her when she heard this, but unfortunately she also dropped Taboo back onto the hard street. "... Oooow..."
"Oops. Sorry!"
"I think you need glasses," Pound said. Even if he had a point, Taboo wasn't about to have it. She got up and tried to give him a piece of her mind, but then he said something that reminded her of something very important. "We're gonna be late." The group put off injuring Taboo, teasing Taboo, or getting an earful from Taboo in order to dash up the North Path towards the schoolyard.
The whole idea behind meeting up at the North Path was so Taboo and the twins could walk together, but since Taboo rarely ever showed up on time they usually just ended up galloping together. At the very least it was good exercise. Time was a kind mistress this morning, allowing the gang to arrive in the schoolyard before the bell. The three arrived panting and sweating at the fence, where the fourth member of the crew was waiting for them.
"Hey, you guys made it!" Venom gave them a wave and a smile, even if it was lost on her friends. They all wished she would stop acting so surprised when they finally showed up, but hoping for something like that was pointless. Even if she was hiding behind somepony else's face, it was always the same blockheaded changeling underneath. "Did Taboo hold you all up again?" At least she knew exactly who was to blame.
"You might say she ran into a little trouble." Pound laughed a little and Taboo's expense. She didn't let that get to her, but when she saw even Pumpkin was snickering a little she couldn't help but feel defeated. At least Venom was, as per usual, completely oblivious. "Alright, everypony ready to go inside?" A small silence fell over the group. With stern expressions, they all nodded their agreement.
Even as they headed up to the schoolhouse, there was a visibly notable shift in the atmosphere. They headed straight for the door, and as they got closer anypony who was in their way reluctantly got out of it. They moved for a reason that wasn't a secret to anypony, and they moved for the most obvious reason of all. It was the same story inside the school. Even if they were just a group of five year old ponies, even the older students begrudgingly made way. To the untrained ear the bystanders moved quietly, but Taboo didn't even have to perk up her ears to hear them.
"Don't look at her or you'll be cursed with bad luck..."
"Notice how cloudy it got when she showed up?"
"Why is she still here?"
"Taboo, you aren't listening to them, are you?"
"Huh?" Taboo realized the last voice came from nearby. She looked over at Pumpkin, who could tell by the confused look on Taboo's face that she'd been doing just that. "Uh, no."
"You shouldn't listen to them." Pumpkin was adamant on this point, and she was hardly ever the serious one. "They never say anything nice."
"Ah, well... I'm not listening for the compliments." Taboo decided not to mention that she really couldn't help but overhear anyway. Truth be told, she did have one odd curiosity that drove her to listen in a little. "I just want to know what rumors are going around. Wouldn't you want to know what they're saying about you?"
"We hang out with you, so we know what they're saying about us. You don't have to listen in to figure out what they're saying," Pound said addressing Taboo. He turned to his sister next. "And you should just let Taboo listen in if she wants to. If it really bugged her, she wouldn't be doing it."
"But-!"
"Hey, what're they saying about me?" Venom asked out of the blue.
"Oh... uh, you really want to know?" Taboo asked, but Venom looked absolutely certain. She really didn't want to tell her the truth, but Taboo couldn't think up a believable lie fast enough. "W-well, they all think you're pretty-"
"They think I'm pretty?!"
"-violent and crazy."
"... WHAT?!" Locusta, whoever she really was, happened to actually be a rather cute little filly, so it was kind of a shame Venom was always using her visage to make all kinds of scary expressions. "Who said that about me? Was it that guy? I'll kill him!"
"N-nopony is saying that right now!" Taboo lied, seeing as since Venom was yelling and making one of her faces again right in the middle of the hallway.
"Right, cuz they know better than to mess with me." Venom turned and spat on the floor next to a group of older colts, which just about scared the poor fellows right out of their hides.
"Locusta, no spitting in the hallway."
"Why dontcha shaddup and clean it up yourself?" Venom turned and attempted to stare down the pony who turned out to be Principal Walnut. Venom had a weird feeling that he wasn't entirely pleased with her response based on how he grabbed her by the saddlebags and started dragging her off.
"Make sure to tell Ms. Twilight that Locusta will be late."
"No! Wait! I was just kidding! Can't you take a joke? Save me guys! Save meeee!"
"Oh, poor Venom," Pumpkin said, ever sympathetic.
"It's hard to feel sorry for her when she acts like that." Pound did not share his sister's sentiment.
"I knew I shouldn't have told her anything." Taboo felt at least partially responsible, even if she realized that Venom kind of had it coming given her attitude.
"She asked for it." Pound reminded her of what started it all, but it didn't help lift Taboo's guilt or Pumpkin's empathy. "Ugh, let's just get to class or all of us will be in trouble. We seriously can't spend so much time moping around in the morning." Pound continued on, leaving his sister and Taboo behind.
"W-wait for us, Pound!" Pumpkin started after him. "Come on, Taboo!"
"Right behind you!" Every morning had gone about this way since Taboo started school. Taboo knew it wasn't exactly the standard school experience, but she felt safe at school now. Her circle of friends hadn't expanded at all, but she wasn't interested in being friends with ponies who didn't understand her. Maybe one day they could all get along, but until then Taboo walked the hall with her head held high and her ears perked up.
She'd never listened so closely to the other ponies before. Before she'd simply ignored it and kept herself from listening, but deep down inside she wanted to know what it was they were all so afraid of. The more she listened, the sadder it made her. It was certainly due in part to the disparaging things they would say, but there was also the way that they just repeated the same old lines day in and day out. None of them sounded eager to give their bias a second thought. She told herself it was far too early to hope for any kind of change, and just kept on walking.
All things considered, she found herself enjoying school somehow. She got to spend all day with her friends and learning things from Twilight was actually a lot of fun. She managed to focus on school even while on edge of the other children. She just stayed away from them in the back, surrounded by her friends. Despite being so far away, Taboo had no trouble at all hearing what Twilight was saying with her remarkable sense of hearing.
She had begun believing in her heart that she could truly carry on in this manner, and that became the first vital step in living what at least resembled a normal life. Even if it wasn't normal, Taboo was able to carry on happily. She laughed and played like anypony her age should, even if the whispers persisted throughout the days. For the time being, it was enough that Taboo was learning her way around the world and her own reality. She was still naive enough to keep the blinders on and focus her experience in on the positives, something she'd picked up from her family. It wasn't any kind of crime, and perhaps even an excusable shortcut considering that she'd managed to overcome one of her biggest hurdles yet.
There was plenty of time for next steps. There was still plenty of time for maturity to set in. There was still plenty of time to play with the dynamics; however, it would all have to wait until Taboo had done a little more growing up...
Spring sprung anew in Ponyville. The season for hibernation came to a close for half of all living things while the season for estivation drew close for the other half. Green or white, it could be a season of either sleep or restlessness. For ponies, each season was full of restlessness. For the children of Ponyville, a new school year was beginning. For some this was the beginning of a new cycle, but for others it was simply another spin on the wheel. It was neither inherently good nor inherently bad, but each face greeted it with their own level of enthusiasm.
One bespectacled pegasus was flying towards the schoolhouse by herself. She glided easily along the sky, her long mane fluttering behind her. Even though she was nowhere near school, she touched down casually and began to trot along the ground. She knew this street would be empty at this hour of the morning, and so she decided to once again enjoy the quiet held in place by the brisk air. She was dilly-dallying again, something one would expect somepony who lived inside a whirlwind to do every so often.
She found a certain joy in being blissful and unseen. If nopony was around to see her, then she knew she truly wasn't pretending to be happy. She was too tough to really know for certain at times, but morning strolls like these cleared up her cumulative doubts. She didn't have as many these days, but it didn't make her enjoy the sunshine any less.
"Morning."
She turns sharply at the sound of the unexpected sound of somepony's voice. She'd been so engrossed in her own thoughts that she'd neglected to hear the pony coming, but now she wasn't alone anymore. She sighed, sad that such moments were always so short lived.
"Morning," she says, returning the greeting three times as chipper. The stallion she sees is not a stranger, but not really a friend either. He is just somepony she knows through her mother. This character is not unkind, but still just a touch cold. "Out early?"
"Early practice," Thunderlane says. He does not usually go this way, and he doesn't have a real reason beyond how his hooves moved today for being there. "Doesn't school start in five minutes?"
"I'm always late." It wasn't an excuse so much as an observation of the truth. "If I start showing up on time on the first day, I'd be expected to do it for the rest of the year."
"Well, don't take it too easy." Thunderlane heads off in the opposite direction. He himself does not want to be late.
She continues on her way too without any parting words. Truth be told she at least wanted to be on time to meet her friends before school. She flies away with just a bit of haste under her wings. Taboo goes unburdened into the blue sky, and unafraid into the eighth year of her life.
16
"Alright, I'm going to pass back last week's test," the teacher said, levitating the stack of papers before her. "Don't leave until you get yours back. Aces High?"
"Right here, teach."
Taboo began packing up her things. It was finally the end of another Friday at school, which meant she had a whole weekend free from responsibility to look forward to. She rapped twice on the wooden surface of her desk, just to be sure her desire for leisure didn't get jinxed somehow. When it came to having a free weekend, it usually ended up being a bit of a day at the races for Taboo.
Her mother and father were always so busy that she usually ended up just looking after Aurora, unless the filly had other plans or Scootaloo was around to look after her. Taboo's parents were pretty clear on their position that if Taboo didn't have anything going on, she could spare a few hours for her sister. Taboo loved her sister, but she spent enough time with her already. She liked to get out of the house every once and a while too. Taboo needed a first line of defense, just in case her parents should ask if she has any plans.
"Hey, Pumpkin!" Taboo turned to the unicorn next to her levitating several unfinished cinnamon rolls into her bag. Pumpkin jumped a little and swiftly shut her bag as if Taboo hadn't already known what she was up to. "You think we could hang out this weekend?"
"Oh, yeah! For sure!" Pumpkin said, smiling brightly from ear to ear. Taboo cheered a little victory inside. Having plans with Pumpkin would give her some leverage when negotiating. "I really need help with my history report!" Turns out this plan came with a stipulation.
"The report? B-but I already finished-"
"I know that, but I really need help with mine!" Pumpkin said. "With your help, I can get it done no problem. Oooh, we can even meet up at the library to do it!"
"The library?" Taboo was not a big fan of the library. Just thinking about it made her eyes itch a little. She adjusted her glasses, unsure of whether or not she was still so opposed to looking after Aurora. "But I was thinking-"
"You and Taboo studying at the library?" Pound asked, interrupting the conversation. "Boy, you two know how to spend a weekend..."
"Pound Cake." The teacher walked by and set a test down on Pound's desk. He looked down at it and instantly made a sour expression.
"... On second thought, a day at the library might not be so bad.
"Pumpkin Cake."
"Hey! I didn't completely fail!" Pumpkin tended to look on the bright side of her grades.
"Taboo."
"Oh, thanks." Taboo looked down at her own test. Looking down at her letter grade, she couldn't get very excited about it. She knew her mother would be, once again, extremely pleased, but that was probably because she never expected to have a smart kid. Taboo smiled and put the test in her bag, comforted by the fact that at least somepony would get a kick out of it.
"So, we doing this library thing tomorrow?" Pound asked in order to confirm. "I think I need to look over my report again too..."
"Yeah, it'll be great!" Pumpkin said. She turned to the pony sitting in the desk just in front of her. "You want to come too?"
"Please, me? Study on a weekend?" The pony levitated her test up for the others to see. Once again, it was a perfect score. "Go ahead without me. I think I'll just relax."
"Sheesh Locusta, you're such a geek."
"Oy, hows about you cram it, Lagan?" Locusta scowled at the earth pony sitting adjacent from her. He payed her no heed himself, opting to stuff his own test into his bag. He really didn't want anypony to see it. Venom, meanwhile, didn't like being ignored. "Why doncha take your attitude back on the boat to Baltimare?"
"Forget her, I'll go with you guys," Lagan said. "I'm more fun than her any day."
"It's a study session, Lagan." Pound's reminder was largely ignored by the colt.
"Okay, the more the merrier!" Pumpkin had basically forgotten the point of the trip as well.
"Huh? You can't be serious!" Locusta retorted. "Alright, fine! I'll go too. Taboo isn't enough to help all three of you morons."
"Hey! That's a bit touchy!" Pound immediately regretted talking back to Locusta as she instantly jumped over his desk and put him in a headlock.
"Wuzzat? You got somethin' to say, huh?"
Taboo supposed it was too late to back out now. Her parents would certainly release her from Aurora duty for a study session, even if it would inevitably dissolve into slacking off before the end of the day. These "study sessions" always ended up that way, but Taboo was just grateful things were lively. It made everyday a little more exciting.
"A study group?" Rainbow Dash shoveled another spoonful of oatmeal into her mouth. "Your rocked that last test, whaddya need a study group for?"
"It's not so much for me as for the others." Taboo did her best to ignore her own mother talking with her mouth full. She didn't understand why she always ate like something was going to sneak up on her and steal her food. Taboo preferred to take it slow, as she waited to complete her sentence before continuing her breakfast.
"Nice of you to help out," Rainbow Dash said before swallowing. "It'll be fine. Your father can stay home with Aurora today."
"Where are you going?" Taboo asked.
"Twilight was worried about something over in the Everfree, or something." Rainbow Dash shoveled more oatmeal into her mouth. "Wasn't really paying attention."
"Yeah, I think I'll be going with you," Thunderhead said, putting down his own breakfast for a moment. "I was paying attention, and it sounds like it'll be dangerous."
"I can take care of myself."
"I'm sure you can, but let me tag along for my own peace of mind."
"But it's your day off, don't you want to spend it with your daughter?" Rainbow Dash gestured to Aurora with a full spoon. The filly had already finished her breakfast, so she sat with a big smile behind an empty bowl just listening to her family talk. They half expected her to chip in at this point, but she just continued looking on. It wasn't clear if she knew that they were talking about her specifically. "Don't you want to spend the day with your dad, Aurora?"
"Yes!" Aurora's answer wasn't at all surprising, but what she said next was. "But mommy can have him so she can be safe."
"Ha! That's two against one," Thunderhead said, claiming victory for his cause.
"Fine, you can tag along." Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes and shoved the rest of her oatmeal into her mouth. "But then what are you going to do, Aurora?"
"I don't know!" Aurora was still all smiles. Not even an uncertain future could get her down. Rainbow Dash puzzled for a moment.
"I hate to bother her out of the blue, but maybe Roseluck will let her play with Applerose until we're done." There wasn't much else she could do, considering the rest of her friends were going to be busy helping Twilight too. "I'd hate to leave her here alone."
"I wouldn't be alone," Aurora said. "I'd have Tank!"
"... Let's just swing by Sweet Apple Acres before we head out."
"Alright, so what do you three have so far?" Taboo asked. Pumpkin, Pound, and Lagan rocked in their seats a little, filling the once silent library with just a smidgen of noise. It didn't bode well for the rest of the day. "Do any of you have... anything?"
"You three can't be serious." Venom didn't like having to disguise herself as Locusta on her days off, but she hated that she was friends with three complete idiots even more. "Alright, topics then. What did you all choose for your topics?"
"What did you two choose?" Pumpkin asked, but her question was only answered by Venom slamming the table with her front hooves. "Eeep!"
"You're not copying us!"
"Aww..."
"... But if you really want to know." Venom reeled her temper back in. She reminded herself that she was here to help. "I wrote my report on the Changeling Empire."
"That's a weird topic," Lagan said, but this just earned him an icy glare from Venom. He didn't need any verbal prompting to know he was now on the spot to present a better idea. "Uh... I thought about doing mine on Yakyakistan."
"Pfft, good luck finding sources." Venom turned to Pumpkin next. "How about you?"
"So get this!" No sooner had Pumpkin said this than both Taboo and Venom knew she had not picked a suitable topic. "There's this place that a greedy queen made this genie destroy with a gigantic storm!"
"This is a history paper, not mythology!" Venom paused her complaint for a moment to turn to Taboo. "Genies aren't real, right?"
"Well... I've never seen one." Taboo didn't know for certain either. While Venom mulled it over, Taboo turned to the last pony at the table. "I wrote my paper about Saddle Arabia. What's your topic?"
"I thought I'd just do Ponyville."
"Pfft, that's such a Pound thing to do," Venom said without so much as an attempt to hide her disappointment. "At least Lagan and Pound have workable topics. Taboo, see if you can help Pumpkin find someplace she can write about."
"But it's a real place, it's called-"
"I think Locusta is right, Pumpkin," Taboo said before Pumpkin could embarrass herself further or enrage Venom further. "Let's go check the shelves for something that interests you." Just like that, Taboo found herself wandering the between the shelves of the library. No matter how far she got from Venom and the boys, she could still hear the filly giving the pair an earful at regular intervals. Taboo wished she could make some progress with Pumpkin, who was very resistant to any ideas Taboo presented.
She replaced another book and heaved a sigh. This wasn't how she wanted to spend her Saturday, but she held onto the hope that it would soon dissolve into chaos. Even if she could get Pumpkin to make just a little progress, it was likely Taboo could trigger the group into slacking off. With renewed hope, she set about searching the shelves again.
"Let's see... there should be a book in here about Griffonstone." Taboo looked but did not find it. She even cleaned her glasses and took a second look, but it wasn't to any avail. She had been sure there was at least one on the shelf near here. "Where is it?"
"Sorry, it just got returned this morning." A purple claw reached over Taboo and placed the book in question back onto the shelf. Taboo turned about and looked up at Spike the Dragon. For her, he'd almost always been just about the size of her mother. The dramatic change of his size was lost on her, so she faced the tall drake without fear. Spike was a friend, even if he rarely left the library these days. "Hey Taboo."
"Hey Spike." Taboo winced as she heard Venom yell something less than savory at Lagan and Pound. "Sorry, are we being too loud?"
"It's fine since nopony else is here right now. We don't get many visitors on Saturday," Spike said. "You helping your friends out with some school stuff?"
"Yeah... the library not my idea of a fun Saturday." Taboo decided she would rather not complain about it to Spike. She realized he probably spent every weekend cooped up in here. She turned the conversation elsewhere. "Read any good books lately?"
"I guess so." Spike stared ahead at the shelf for a moment. He didn't look particularly enthralled by this subject. "Nowadays I just pick a book of the shelf and just read it. Being picky about it makes things kinda dull."
"Sounds like something Twilight might do."
"Yeah, I'm a regular bookworm now." Spike smiled a little. "I guess as far as dragon hordes go, knowledge and books is pretty out there... not that I am hoarding... I think." Just the mention of hoarding drained the last bit of joy Spike had appeared to be feeling. His sudden melancholy wasn't lost on Taboo, who struggled to redirect the conversation for a second time.
"H-Hey! What exactly is Twilight up to today?" Taboo asked the first question that popped into her head. "My mom said she asked her to go with her to check out the Everfree, or something."
"Hmm? Oh, that." Spike snapped out of his gloom, attempting to recall what Twilight had been going on about for the last few days. He specifically remembered it being horribly boring, but beyond that it was a bit blurry. "... I think she explained it to me... but I don't think I was listening. You see, there was this dog..."
"Hey! Taboo!" Pumpkin appeared from around the shelves. She scampered right up to Spike and Taboo, not seeming to care whether or not she was interrupting. She slammed a heavy book down in front of Taboo and smiled from ear to ear. "Can I do Zebrica?"
"Zebrica? Yeah, that'll work!" Taboo was legitimately impressed that Pumpkin had come up with a workable topic all by herself. That feeling of pride went away when Taboo looked down at the book Pumpkin had presented her. "Uh... Pumpkin... this is a dictionary."
"Yeah, it's the only book I could find that talks about it." Pumpkin opened the book up and flipped all the way to the back where the "Z" words were. "See, right here!"
"Zebrica (zee-bruh-kuh ) noun: continent southwest of Equestria across the Monstrous Sea." Taboo read it to herself a second time, if only because she really couldn't believe this was all Pumpkin had come up with. She looked up at Spike, but he was already making a face like he had bad news. "There are no books on Zebrica in the library right now?"
"Other fillies and colts in your class might've had the same idea," Spike said, but then he remembered a little tidbit of information. "But, there is somewhere else you might be able to get information."
"Oooh! Do you mean Zecora's?" Pumpkin had never met the Zebra living out in the Everfree, but Pinkie always spoke of her fondly. Even if Pinkie spoke of everypony fondly, it was still encouraging. She even had a song about this particular resident. "Yeah, let's go see her!"
"What about Venom and the boys?"
"What are you? Stupid?! Show me some real writing this time!"
"We'll be back before they know it," Pumpkin said with a smile on her face. "C'mon! If I ask Zecora for help on this, I'm sure to get a good grade! If I get a better grade than Pound, my parents are gonna flip out! Please, oh please can we go? I can't go alone, so please?"
"I'd be glad to go... but..." Taboo looked up at Spike. "Isn't there something going on in the Everfree?"
"Well... maybe?" Spike still couldn't recall what was going on exactly. He just shrugged it off. "It's probably nothing; I wouldn't worry about it."
"Yeah, it's probably just boring adult stuff," Pumpkin said with a dismissive wave of her hoof. "I mean, it's not like they ever do anything exciting."
"Take this!"
The massive adder received another technicolor sock across it's enormous jaw. The dizzied reptile did not appreciate being up against such a fast opponent, and it appreciated even less being blasted with magic from either side as it reeled from the impact. It lashed out at its attackers once more, but only managed to sink its fangs into the dirt. Its oppressors scattered quickly, easily avoiding the attack from the very edge of its range. The serpent hissed loudly and recoiled for another strike.
"Yeee-haw!"
Before the creature could lunge again, a rope found its way around its neck. Baffled, it regarded the accessory for a brief moment before a sharp tug brought its massive head crashing down. On the other end, Applejack pulled against the monster with her hooves dug deep into the ground. She was assisted by Pinkie Pie right behind her and assisted to some small extend perhaps by Fluttershy who screamed as she waved the end of the rope around in her hooves.
The serpent regained its senses and began to pull back, overpowering the three ponies. Before it could make too much headway, Twilight and Rarity grabbed the rope with their magic and assisted with the tug-of-war. Slowly yet surely, the snake began to lose ground. For the finishing blow, Rainbow Dash swooped down and took the end of the rope from Fluttershy. She flew a swift circle around the base of a thick tree before tying the rope off in a tight knot. Just like that, the massive snake was subdued.
"Nothin' to it!" Rainbow Dash said, dusting off her hooves.
"Good work girls," Twilight said while keeping a careful eye on their captive. Despite being tethered securely, the back end of the creature was still wreaking havoc several yards away. "Do you think they need our help?"
"It might not be help needed, but I reckon it should be help given," Applejack said. The girls wasted no time, except for maybe Fluttershy, in rushing towards the other end of the snake.
Meanwhile, at the other end of the snake, Soarin' was being tossed around like a rag doll from the clutches of the serpent's opposite head. With Thunderhead flying about the creature's head and Pierce blasting it from below, it was having trouble finding a spare moment to try and swallow its prey. At least it didn't have to worry about Time Turner meekly attempting to tie a rope around the snakes belly.
"Maybe I could go around... no, that won't work... maybe if I... no... this monster wrangling business is tough." Time Turner stared at the rope and the snake, neither party really visibly concerned with the other.
"Hang on, Soarin'!" Thunderhead shouted over the snake's hissing.
"I've got him right where I want him!" Soarin' was beating the snake's lip with his forelegs. Despite his valiant efforts and delusional self confidence, he wasn't doing any damage; however, the slight irritation was enough to make the snake decide to take a gamble by tossing a discombobulated Soarin' into the air. As Soarin' tumbled around, the snake flailed it's head madly to either side. Surprised by the sudden change in behavior, both Thunderhead and Pierce found themselves knocked aside, one into the sky and the other into a tree. Time Turner had managed to tangle himself up in his own rope, so he was effectively out of commission as well. Freed from the distractions, the snake only had to open its mouth skyward as Soarin' came tumbling back down.
Before the snake could clamp down on it's meal, a rope flew from the forest and wrapped itself around the snake's bottom jaw. With one yank, the snake found itself in the dirt and in a fairly uncomfortable position. It tried to rise again, but was immediately knocked unconscious when Soarin' dropped hard onto the top of its head. A bit dazed himself, Soarin' took a second to stand back up and take stock of what had transpired.
"... See, toldja I had him!"
"Yeah, sure you did," Thunderhead said, touching down next to the knocked out head. He looked down to the end of the rope where a blonde stallion was tying up the end of the rope to a tree. "Good job, Meadow Song."
"I thought about letting the snake eat him first," the stallion said. "But as you can see... I had the thought too late."
"Well, act now think later, right?" Pierce said, covered in leaves. "You think the ladies are done?"
"Done and done," Rainbow Dash said, whizzing by the stallions before looping back around and landing next to Thunderhead. "So, who's hungry?"
"No food!" Twilight said, marching into the clearing with the rest of her crew in tow. "We've got to figure out a way to get this monster back to where it came from."
"This might just be the laziness talking, but I'd rather have lunch," Pierce said. He slung a foreleg around his wife and magicked the rest of the leaves out of his hair. "How about North Winds? They should still be serving breakfast."
"No! It is not the time for that!"
"She's right," Fluttershy said, her husband nodding alongside her. He was still a bit tied up. "We need to pick up the children from Applejack's. We can't put Roseluck and Big Macintosh out like this."
"They're all probably having a blast!" Pinkie hopped atop the snake's head, where Soarin' was trying to alleviate his own aching head. "Get it? It's 'a blast' because it's so much fun they might explode!"
"That's what I'm worried about," Fluttershy said, but only in a whisper. "We can't just leave them there while we go out."
"And we can't leave this gaint two-headed snake here and go out!" Twilight was surprised she had to remind everypony about this. Still, it didn't look like they cared in the least. "C'mon Applejack, help me out he-aaaand you're too busy making out."
"Mmph, wha?" Applejack separated from Meadow Song long enough to pay Twilight a little attention. "You say somethin'?"
"... No, please, just go about your business! Don't let impending danger distract you all from your business!"
"... Alright?" Applejack exchanged a confused glance with her coltfriend before turning back to Twilight. "Speakin' of danger, are we gonna do anythin' with this snake monster?"
"D-d-did you hear that?!" Pumpkin backed into Taboo, who had also jumped backwards into Pumpkin.
"How could I not?" Taboo's eyes darted around, but the source of the bloodcurdling scream she'd just heard evaded her. "L-let's keep moving. I th-think we're almost there."
"I hope so." Pumpkin and Taboo hurried down the path that allegedly lead to Zecora's hut. The Everfree was frightening enough without the previous scream, especially for two young fillies. Their parents had warned them enough about the dangers of the forest to condition them to be scared out of their wits. Pumpkin's idea was seeming less and less like one of the good ones the deeper they got, but they were more afraid of turning around than continuing on.
Taboo, for her part, didn't understand why she was so afraid. Other than the random scream, she hadn't heard anything else nearby that was worth being worried over; however, the ambiance of the forest didn't sit well with her at all. For whatever reason, she just wanted to be back in town as soon as possible. If she didn't have to stay with Pumpkin, she would've opted just to fly over the forest instead of ever going into it. Her first venture into the forest was upon her despite her reservations, and as a darkened clearing occupied by a singular, exotic hut came into view it became clear that her trip to the Everfree had only just begun.
"You think she's home?" Pumpkin asked, realizing their walk through the forest would've been a complete waste if Zecora had decided to step out for brunch.
"Well, I can see a light in the window," Taboo said. She perked up her ears towards the hut. "... And I can hear somepony talking inside."
"Is she talking in rhyme?" Pumpkin asked, already keen to Zecora's mode of speech.
"... Not she... and no." Taboo could hear a male voice inside the hut, and as the pair of fillies inched closer Taboo realized she recognized the voice. "It sounds like Principal Walnut."
"What?" Pumpkin grabbed Taboo and threw her into a nearby shrub. She jumped in after her friend and grabbed her once more, pressing their noses together. Taboo didn't need her glasses to see the intrigue in Pumpkin's eyes. "Can you hear what they're talking about?"
"Well, kind of?" Taboo stretched up her ears. She didn't understand Pumpkin's interest, but tried her best to pick up on the spine of the conversation. "I'm not sure... but Principal Walnut is laughing."
"He's laughing? He never laughs!" Pumpkin released Taboo so she could think for a moment. "I don't think he even smiles. What else?"
"I think Zecora is laughing too?" Taboo didn't know for sure, seeing as she'd never met Zecora before.
"We've got to get closer," Pumpkin said, hopping right out of the bush in the least stealthy manner Taboo had seen. Taboo followed behind, opting to walk normally seeing as she didn't fear disturbing the peace. She tried to go to the door, but was snatched aside by Pumpkin before she could lift a hoof to knock. She found herself in front of the window, where she could indeed see Principal Walnut talking to a zebra. Taboo had never seen a zebra before, and then she smirked a bit when it occurred to her that no zebra had seen a her before. "Hrrgn, I still can't hear." Pumpkin pressed her ear up to the glass, but all she could hear was warbled gibberish.
"Pumpkin..."
"I'm gonna try the door!" Pumpkin was off towards the front of the cottage without another word, but Taboo wasn't far behind her with a warning.
"Wait! Pumpkin, they're coming out!"
"What makes you think th-" Pumpkin stopped mid-statement as she ran headlong into the suddenly open door. She fell over onto her back and nursed her smarting nose as three ponies moved to stand over her.
"Because I heard them say good-bye." Taboo helped Pumpkin back to her hooves so the pair could face the adults together. It was the first time either of them had seen a zebra in the flesh, and she certainly lived up to her expectations.
"Ah, another visitor, I see. My this has been the eventful day for me." Zecora smiled down at the two fillies, and despite never having seen the pair she could tell who they were just based on what she saw before her.
"H-h-hello!" Taboo couldn't help but shiver a little, given the ambiance of the forest and the gravitas of the ponies before her. "I'm Taboo. It's nice to meet you."
"And I'm Pumpkin!" The unicorn was completely unfazed. Maybe her curiosity was getting the better of her fear, but it was also possible she hadn't quite wrapped her head around a reason to be afraid. In either case, she went right up to Zecora and shook her hoof without a second thought.
"Yes, Pumpkin Cake and Taboo. It is very nice to meet you too." Zecora gestured to the still open door of her cottage. "Come inside, will you not? I believe the tea is still hot."
"I beg your pardon, Miss Zecora," Walnut said before anypony could go anywhere. "But as the school's principal I can't simply allow two of my school's students to be wandering around the Everfree by themselves. Especially two students that are so young."
"We weren't wandering!" Pumpkin said in their defense. "We were coming here, to Zecora's!"
"Pumpkin wanted to ask Zecora about her home country for a school assignment," Taboo said. She knew mentioning a school project would surely get the principal on their side. The statement did seem to interest him, but not near as much as it interested Zecora.
"Oh, you want an interview!" There was something less mystical and more giddy about Zecora's smile now. "I can hardly believe it, since I've had so few! Please, please, my little pony come inside. Please ask me anything for I've nothing to hide!" Zecora almost dragged Pumpkin into her hut, if not for Pumpkin's equal eagerness to follow along. Principal Walnut and Taboo were left on Zecora's stoop alone for the moment.
"Do your parents know you're here?" Walnut asked a very poignant question. Taboo decided she should try and change the subject immediately.
"So, what brings you all the way out here?" Taboo realized she'd just accidentally answered the principal's question. She just smiled like nothing was wrong. Principal Walnut, for his part, decided that her foiks would probably figure it out for themselves eventually.
"As the school grows we need more teachers. The teachers we've hired on from Canterlot are doing a fine job, but there are still openings that need to be filled. I believe Miss Zecora would be an excellent edition, since she's so learned in many subjects. I've been working on arrangements with her in preparation for next year."
"That's pretty exciting."
"Not as exciting as wandering through the Everfree on your own."
"Ah, oh! I can hear Pumpkin calling for me!" Taboo exited the conversation through Zecora's open door.
"I don't hear anything..."
"Super hearing!"
"... W-w-w... w-waaaaaaaAAAAAAAAH!" Applerose was in tears mere moments after Finesse had slid the lid of the barrel off. It only followed that she would hide in the barn, seeing as it was the closest building to the farmhouse where her parents were. The unicorn filly had suspected that she was hiding in one of the barrels specifically, so she'd just been levitating the lids off to see if any of them would cry. Sure enough, her plan was a success.
"I found you," Finesse said as the barrel lid slipped from her telekinetic grasp and right onto her head. She winced for a moment, but she held back any other reaction and maintained her cool. Applerose, on the other hoof, redoubled her tears at the sight.
"A-are y-y-y-you okay-ay-ay?"
"... Yes." A single tear escaped from Finesse's eye. "Let's go. I need to find everypony else."
"You mean... I'm the first?" Applerose would've teared up again if her eyes weren't already full of tears. "WaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-"
"No, you're third." Finesse gestured to the front door of the barn. Peeking in from outside was Willow and Maple, who had said they were too afraid to go in. Finesse had decided not to waste time prying into exactly what it it was they were afraid of. "We're wasting time here. We have to get to the orchard."
"The... *sniff*... orchard?"
Finesse was already heading out the door. Applerose hopped out of the barrel and followed right behind her with the shy sisters following her lead. It didn't take that long to get to the orchard, but in the dense maze of trees it seemed an impossible task for anypony to find a child; however, Finesse had a plan. She scanned the ground, looking for the telltale signs of her target. Sure enough, on the outer edge of the orchard there were trees with an unusual amount of the fall foliage scattered around their bases. Of course, there were lots of leaves on the ground all over the orchard, but Finesse had one other way of finding out if her target was nearby. She stepped between the trees and cleared her throat.
"I love you."
"Aww." Aurora gently flew out of the canopy. With her hooves wide open, she slowly flew down to Finesse and wrapped her in an aerial hug. "I love you too."
"I found you." Finesse, still in the embrace of the little pegasus, trotted over to the tree Aurora had flown out of. She reared up and bucked it with everything she had, and even though it wasn't much she managed to shake more than just leaves from its limbs.
"Whooaooooaoa!" Surprise landed headfirst on the ground among the leaves. Applerose teared up at the sight, but thankfully Surprise sprang up with a smile before she could begin bawling aloud. "That was fast!"
"I found you."
"Indeedy-doo!" Surprise said, bouncing up and down while flapping her wings. Despite her best efforts, she was still unable to stay airborne. "Boy, and after all that hard work I put in climbing up that tree after Aurora! Almost feels wasted, but falling out was fun! I wanna do it again!" Surprise took a running jump at the tree and began to shimmy back up.
"How did you know they'd be up there?" Applerose asked.
"Aurora can fly, so she'd fly up high," Finesse said. "And Surprise can't fly, so she'd try to hide where Aurora was hiding to throw me off."
"Wow, you're so smart, Finesse," Aurora said, tightening her grip. "That's why I love you."
"Do you know where Soulmerry is?" Applerose asked, curious as to where the final player was hiding. Finesse didn't skip a beat with her answer.
"Cheating, most likely." Finesse didn't explain herself any further. The explanation came right out of thin air.
"Hey! It's not cheating!"
"Shh! You'll give us away!"
"But she said we're cheating!" a little disembodied voice said. "They said the only rule was that we couldn't go far from the farmhouse, and we didn't! We've been right here the whole time!"
"Yes, so be quiet and just wait!"
"I am waiting!"
"They're looking at us..."
"They can't be looking at us!" the voice said as the group approached the source of the noise. "We are invisible!"
"I found you," Finesse said, pointing an accusing hoof at thin air.
"No! No you didn't!"
"You too, Mister Discord." Finesse reached out her hoof until it poked something solid.
"How many times have I said it?" Discord snapped his fingers, causing him and a little earth pony to suddenly appear before the group. The filly with him instantly jumped behind his legs and ducked in cover, not ready to give up. "It's just Discord, kiddos. None of this 'Mister Discord' stuff. Do your parents make you call me that?"
"Oh, Mister Discord! I didn't see you there." Aurora, who had been too busy hugging Finesse to notice what had been going on, released the unicorn and flew up to Discord. She gave him a big hug around the neck. "I love you."
"Y-yes, hello Aurora, but it's just Discord. No mister, okay?"
"I love you."
"I found you, Soulmerry," Finesse said to the pony hiding behind Discord. "Stop hiding. I can see you."
"No you can't!" Soulmerry shouted back.
"Soulmerry, you got found," Willow said from behind Finesse, not wanting to get too close to Discord.
"Yeah, play fair." Maple followed in suite, keeping behind her sister since she didn't want to get too close to Finesse.
"Shh! You can't see me!" Soulmerry yelled at her sisters, causing them both to jump back.
"... Discord, could you move a little?" Finesse asked.
"Well, since you dropped the mister." Discord levitated two feet straight into the air, but without flapping his wings or moving his legs. For some reason his ascension was accompanied by a squeaking sound. Soulmerry was clearly visible now, which she was quick to realize.
"Huh? Wait! Traitor!" Soulmerry looked around, scrapped for options. She hopped up and down, trying to get high enough to be out of sight again. "A-Aurora! Lift me up so I'm behind Discord!"
"Hm? Oh! Soulmerry!" Aurora released Discord and started down to where Soulmerry was.
"No! Wait!" Despite the filly's protests, it was too late. Aurora wrapped her up in a big warm hug, trapping her in plain sight.
"I love you."
"Girls! Your parents are here!" Roseluck shouted from the farmhouse.
"Thanks for all your help, Ms. Zecora," said Pumpkin.
"Oh, it was no trouble at all. Truly, I am just thankful you paid a call." Zecora returned her photo album to the shelf. "And I just hope that all my aid will see you rewarded with a good grade."
"I just hope I pass!" Pumpkin was an optimist, but she was also still keen to the reality of her writing ability. At the very least, her paper would be the the best researched single paragraph of run on sentences ever written. The prospect excited her. "Even if I fail, it was really fun hearing about where you come from."
"It was a lot of fun." Taboo felt a little better about deciding to spend her Saturday this way. "And don't worry, I'll make sure that Pumpkin doesn't slouch on her writing."
"You mean you're gonna write it for me?"
"No." Taboo let out a sigh and shook her head. Zecora giggled a little, making Taboo feel a little like she was being mocked. After spending the last hour or so with Zecora, she was finding the zebra wasn't really all that mysterious. She was actually quite liberal with the dispensation of her true thoughts and feelings.
"It seems you have your hooves full. Being a good friend can be a hard pull."
"Well, I got her this far," Taboo said. "She wanted to write her paper about some myth... something about an island or a storm?"
"There was a genie!" Pumpkin reminded everypony of the real important details.
"Oh, this sounds much like the story of Saxumtactūs," Zecora said. There weren't many other stories that included those elements. "A cautionary tale of power and it's abuse. I believe I have it here in this book, if you are interested in taking a look." Zecora lifted up a book of old fables next to her and opened it up. She presented it to the fillies with the page open to the story in question.
"Oh, so it's some kind of fairytale?" Taboo asked.
"Although the story itself is untrue, it has a tinge of truth as these things tend to." Zecora got up and headed towards her kitchen. "Why don't you read the story for yourself while I go mix up a brew for our health?"
"Sounds good!" Pumpkin said as Zecora disappeared behind the corner.
"Well, we might as well..." Taboo looked down at the page and began to read aloud.
Saxumtactūs was a prosperous, fair paradise sitting on the blue, blue ocean. It was inhabited solely by pegasi, who were able to traverse the sea via flying to arrive at the tropical wonderland. All year around, these lax pegasi celebrated the sun and never let summer slip away. Every once and a while, they would gather their cumulative clouds to bring down a fearsome rainstorm all across the island. The plants grew wild and free, providing the islanders with a rainbow of delicacies to dine on. Beautiful flowers covered every inch of the island, making it one of the most breathtaking places on the ocean. The citizens of Saxumtactūs had it easy.
Equestria, the sovereign nation of ponykind everywhere, did not have the sway to pull the island into itself; however, the they wished to foster warm relations with the sunny islanders anyway. In response to this, a wealthy Canterlot family arranged to have their eldest daughter wed the King of Saxumtactūs. The King was a quiet young stallion preoccupied by the duties of his position, but his bride to be, although very beautiful, was conceited and spoiled. The pegasi of the island were happy to welcome their unicorn newcomer, who they dubbed the Ivory Queen.
It wasn’t just the citizens who were enamored with the Ivory Queen, for the King too found he had a soft spot for the fair unicorn whom he was now wed to. He used his wealth and power to impress her however he could, bringing her fair trinkets from every inch of the globe. The Queen was never satisfied with what she was brought, turning her nose up at every last valuable that was presented to her. The King persisted in order to prove his love until he finally found the gift that was sure to top all gifts: a Genie’s Lamp.
The King was well aware of the power of the Genie, so he summoned him forth and offered up the wishes to his bride. The King was certain that she would wish for the people of their island to live in peace and happiness, but he did not know his Queen at all. He was shocked to hear her first two wishes…
“I wish to possess an ocean of treasures.”
“I wish that nopony could ever come near my bounty.”
The King had not forseen this turn of events. He knew he had to stop her before making the third wish, so he did the one thing he could think of and made the third wish himself.
"I wish you were freed from your prison.”
The Genie, outraged by this display of pure avarice, became a vile and twisted being of darkness. Despite his newly gained freedom, he used it to enact an unfair justice upon the Queen. Unbound by his contract of magic, he was free to grant the first to wishes however he saw fit. For the first wish, he dropped the island deep into the ocean and sank it and all of it's inhabitants forevermore. For the second wish, he placed a raging storm where the island used to be in order to keep anypony else from coming near the sunken island.
The Genie's cruel magic worked swiftly, and in the end only one pony was able to escape his wrath: The King. Whether by luck or due to his kindness, only he lived to tell the tragic story of these wishes gone awry.
To this day The Storm still rages, maintained by the ever spiteful Genie of the Lamp. Where the creature dwells now is impossible to know, but some say he has turned the sunken kingdom into his home and intends to punish anypony foolhardy enough to seek it out.
"Wow, that's a lot more depressing than I remember it being." The story did not seem to sit well with Pumpkin. She was starting to think she was remembering it wrong. It was a lot more uplifting in her mind, and the genie hadn't been quite so mean. There was a slight chance she was half asleep when she heard it the first time. It would explain why she thought it was history; she always slept through history. "What did you think?"
"Seems kind of hokey." Taboo wasn't impressed. "I mean... what's the moral here? Careful what you wish for? Don't judge a book by its cover? The author wasn't very clear about what they were trying to get across."
"Perhaps the only meaning is to tell a story worth repeating," Zecora said, reentering the room. She was joined by a rather off-putting aroma, emanating from the three cups she carried on her back. Neither Pumpkin nor Taboo mentioned it out of courtesy. "Perhaps this story is no literary mystery, but a true piece of history."
"That seems unlikely." Taboo moved to give the book back to Zecora, but she put her hoof up and stopped her.
"I've read that book a thousand times, perhaps it could do some good in the possession of younger minds." Zecora omitted the part where she had two. "Now, you must try my latest brew! It is called Aruthspar-Elec'dru." Zecora shoved the tray of odd beverages at her guests, who found that the cups smelled a lot more rancid up close. The two fillies only had to exchange a single glance before looking back at their gracious host and saying the same thing.
"We should get going!"
"And that's when you came!"
"Yes, sunshine. Please let go of daddy's neck now." Thunderhead tried to reason with his youngest daughter, but she wasn't having it. "Maybe you should fly on your own."
"But then we'd be apart!" Aurora smiled and hugged him tighter.
"Ooof." Thunderhead dipped beneath the clouds for a second. Rainbow Dash just rolled her eyes and waited for the two of them to emerge. Sure enough, they rose back up. Thunderhead was straining, but he managed somehow. "I guess all this is payback for being the baby of the family myself..."
"Oh, right! Your mythical older sister," Rainbow Dash said with a roll of her eyes. "Cirrus, right?"
"If you're keen on meeting her, I've got good news." Thunderhead pried Aurora off and set her into the air next to him. "My folks say she might try and make it down here during Hearth's Warming."
"Hmm... I'm skeptical."
"What?"
"You've definitely had enough time to hire some mare to pretend to be your sister by this point." After she'd failed to appear at several family gatherings, Rainbow Dash wasn't totally sold on her even existing. "I bet she's not even going to look anything like you or your folks."
"Well... no, she won't."
"Yeah, yeah, I know. It's a joke." Rainbow Dash waved her comment off with her hoof, but one pony picked it back up.
"I don't get it," Aurora said. Beyond never seeing her aunt, she had also never heard anything about her before. The fact that she had a relative that she'd never hugged before was somewhat distressing. "Why wouldn't she look like grandma and grandpa?"
Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead looked at each other, realizing this was one of those weird parenting moments that they forgot they would need to tackle. They felt a lot like just skipping the explanation for now, but they could tell even from their peripherals that Aurora was giving them the doe eyes. It was hard to say no to her adorable face.
"Well sunshine, my sister is adopted."
"Adopted?" Aurora didn't know what that was.
"Grandma and grandpa didn't actually give birth to her, you see," Thunderhead said without revealing some of the other technical bits. "But they decided to be her parents anyway."
"Oh... okay." Aurora still didn't look satisfied with the answer. "But then were are the ponies who gave birth to her?"
"Uh... w-who knows?" Thunderhead grinned and shrugged. He didn't really have a concrete or even savory answer for that question. Cirrus had been given up to an orphanage by her mother when she was a foal and never heard from her again. When she was five Thunderhead's parent's adopted her since they were having trouble conceiving their own child, but they evidently had some success with that later down the road.
"Hmm... okay!" This time Aurora accepted the answer. "I guess if anypony knew where they were she wouldn't need grandma and grandpa to be her mommy and daddy!"
Rainbow Dash and Thunderhead looked at each other again, but this time for a completely different reason.
"And that's how Zebrica was made!" Pumpkin smiled and waited for her peers seated before her to give their feedback.
"Pumpkin, you've been writing for an hour! How is that all you have so far?" Taboo said, shocked that Pumpkin had literally written half a sentence since they'd gotten back from Zecora's. Both Pound and Lagan had made considerable strides on their papers thanks to the unblinking and unforgiving supervision of Venom. "And after Zecora gave you such good information to go off of..."
"But Tabooooooo!" Pumpkin groaned and slumped onto the floor. "I did aaaaall that research today, so I'll write it all tomorrow!"
"Well... if you say so..."
"You're too soft, Taboo," Venom said. "You gotta crack down hard! They won't learn if you don't jostle them around!"
"I am very jostled, yes," Lagan said. Pound just nodded in agreement. "But I am glad that I don't have to write the whole thing tomorrow. As terrible as it was, I guess it was worth it."
"Pfft, for you maybe." Venom did not want to admit she actually kind of enjoyed helping out today.
"Well, I'm gonna head home then." Lagan got up and gathered his things. "My folks said I should be home before dinner, and I'm pretty sure its dinner right now."
"I guess it is about that time," said Taboo. The rest of the group also started to gather up their things, but Lagan was packed up and heading out before anypony else.
"Thanks for the help!" Lagan said, opening up the door to the library. He turned back and waved. "See you all Monday!" He trotted off, closing the door behind him.
"Aaah, finally! All safe," Venom said as she shifted form back into her regular changeling self. "Can't believe I spent my whole Saturday in disguise."
"Don't you still have to fly home?" Pound asked.
"Let me have my moment of freedom!" Venom kicked Pound right in his flank, which he took without any complaint. This made her angry as well, so she kicked him a second time right in the same spot.
"I don't know why we can't just tell Lagan," Pumpkin said. "He's trustworthy."
"Well, 'the less ponies who know, the better,'" Pound said in his best Principal Walnut impression. "I wouldn't mind telling him either since I think he'd probably just go with the flow."
"What do you think Venom?" Taboo asked.
"Big whup." Nopony else was sure what to make of that answer.
Eventually everypony had said there goodbyes and they all parted ways with Taboo flying off back to her home. It was an ordinary flight back to her house and when she got inside there was a very normal scene before her. Her mother was reading her usual novels and her father was looking at some scroll that probably had something to do with work. Tank had almost made it into the middle of the den since he left the kitchen this morning after breakfast. Rainbow Dash always said that the slower he moved the better he was feeling.
"Well, look who's back," Thunderhead said while Taboo closed the front door behind her. "Anything exciting happen during your study session?"
"Uh... no! We just studied." Taboo glanced up at the ceiling for a moment after stammering out her answer. "Anything exciting happen with Twilight?"
"Er... not really," Rainbow Dash said looking up from her book. "Just... uh... stuff."
"Pretty uneventful," Thunderhead added.
"Yep. Uneventful day all around," Taboo said. She started on up the stairs to her room, her ears already picking up the sound of Aurora fluttering around nearby. Sure enough, Aurora was waiting for her with big expectant eyes when she walked into her room. "Hey Aurora."
"I missed you!" Aurora said, giving Taboo one of her trademarked hugs.
"Well, did you at least have fun?" Taboo asked as she squeezed her back.
"We played hide-and-seek and Soulmerry cheated but Finesse found her anyway!"
"Well, Finesse is pretty good at hide-and-seek."
"But not as good as you!" Aurora said, zooming up into the air in order to demonstrate the height of Taboo's skill. "Nopony has ever found you!"
"Yeah, I've got skill." Taboo smirked to herself.
"Oh, and guess what!" Aurora said as she returned to the floor. "Did you know daddy has a sister?"
"You mean aunt Cirrus?" Taboo had only ever heard of her, but had never seen her. She was apparently very busy. "I knew about her."
"Oh... you did?" Having her breaking news be old news vexed Aurora, but she stayed determined. "But did you know she's adopted?"
"She... is?" Unlike Aurora, Taboo was familiar with the concept; although, she had never known anypony personally who was adopted. "How do you know?"
"Daddy said that she doesn't look anything like grandma or grandpa or daddy," Aurora said. "Nopony knows where the ponies who gave birth to her are, so grandma and grandpa decided to be her parents instead!"
"They told you all of that, huh?"
"Yeah!" Aurora beamed ear to ear. "It's neat!"
Taboo looked down at Aurora's smiling face. She bore an unmistakable resemblance to Rainbow Dash who in turn resembled Palette. It was almost like they carried a set of genes that were impossible to get away from; however, Taboo had managed it. From the bottoms of her hooves to the tips of her wings, she didn't reflect her mother one bit. She always thought she bore a stronger resemblance to her father, but not near as strongly has he resembles his cousins.
"Taboo?"
"Hmm?" Taboo snapped back to the present. Aurora was looking up at her with concerned eyes.
"What are you thinking about?" she asked, but Taboo just shook her head.
"It's nothing. I'm just tired is all."
"Okay!" Aurora was all smiles again, trusting that Taboo wouldn't hide anything from her. "I'm gonna go put Tank in the kitchen so he's ready for breakfast tomorrow!" With that, Aurora scampered off and left Taboo alone. Taboo was free to return to her previous train of thought, but instead she tried to do the exact opposite. It was too heavy to dwell on, so she wanted to think about anything else. She opened up her saddlebags and took out the book that Zecora had given her. She brought it over to her bed and flopped down on her stomach, flipping through the pages. Quietly, she began to read to herself.
"Saxumtactūs was a prosperous, fair paradise sitting on the blue, blue ocean..."
1
"How did this all start?" Princess Celestia's voice floated through the empty throne room, winding around the ivory pillars and echoing off the panels of stained glass. She sat atop her throne, accompanied only by her sister, the Princess Luna. Specks of dust could be seen floating about in the colorful shafts of light that came through those tall, colorful windows. Standing in the light was an equally colorful pegasus mare who cradled a foal swaddled tightly in a Wonderbolts blanket. Between the foal's dingy, grey coat and matted, purple mane, she looked just like any other sleeping foal. Only a few long, tufts of hair sticking up from her ears made her appear any different from any other foal; however, they did not do the depth of her difference justice.
"We just found her and then I said I would take care of her for the time being. I had no idea what I was getting myself into," Rainbow Dash said. She gazed down at the foal.
"Has she been troublesome?" Luna asked. Rainbow Dash's head jerked back up at the Princesses as she quickly shook her head. The difficulty of caring for the foal for the past week did not come from the foal herself. The sleepless nights and feelings of isolation came from an entirely different, but not unrelated, source.
"She's been great! Taking care of her has been the easy part," she explained. She took a moment to pinpoint what the hard part had been. "When we found her, we didn't care what she looked like; we just wanted to make sure she wasn't left alone. We didn't care what kind of wings or eyes she had... but everypony else didn't think that way."
Rainbow Dash took the blanket between her teeth and unwound it until the foal's little wings unfurled from beneath. The wings were not the feathered, soft wings of a pegasus, but the violet, leathery wings of a bat. Even from high on their thrones, both Princesses could determine the difference. The foal stirred, prompting Rainbow Dash to secure the blanket around her once more. The Princesses took the moment to glance at one another, both hoping their sibling knew how to proceed.
"Twilight said something about ponies with wings like hers in your guard, Luna. We were hoping you could shed some light on who her parents might be," Rainbow Dash said.
When Luna first learned from Celestia that Twilight and the others had found such a foal, she knew she'd be put on the spot like this. She had told herself over and over in her head to just come out and explain everything when the moment came, but now that the moment had come she found herself hesitating.
"My sincerest apologies, Rainbow Dash, but I am afraid I cannot help you in that regard. My servants, the Fellwings, are transformed by magic so they may appear as they do. Never in years past have I even heard of a pony have that appearance without the aid of magic. Again, I apologize for being unable to satisfy any queries you might have." Luna cast her gaze to the ceiling, still wishing for even one nugget of information that might help Rainbow Dash.
"Is that true, Princess Celestia?" Dash asked. The Princess of the Sun nodded like only the wisest of sages can; she nodded knowing Luna's speech was one hundred percent true.
"The motif Luna used for her guards was meant to emulate bats, that's all. As far as I know, which is very far, there has never been a pony born with wings like the one you hold," she said. Rainbow Dash looked back down at the bundle in her hooves while she processed what she just heard. The silence in the throne room dragged on for what felt like an hour before Celestia finally spoke up again. "Rainbow Dash, I need you to explain everything in more detail: how you found her, how the ponies in Ponyville reacted to her. I need to know as much as I can before I decide how to proceed."
Rainbow Dash swallowed, hard. She brushed a bit of the sleeping foal's mane out of her face, recalling with fondness how they had first met.
"We were heading home after visiting a friend of ours in the Everfree when Applejack heard her crying. We followed the sound until we all found her in a clearing. Once we calmed her down, we talked about what we should do next. We decided it would be best for one of us to take care of her until we could talk to you about her, so I volunteered to take her in for the time being. The girls were nothing but helpful. Applejack lent me Applebloom's old foal stuff, Twilight gave me a bunch of books on foalcare, Rarity made her a doll, and Fluttershy and Pinkie said they could watch her for me if I was ever too busy. We had a sort of 'Welcome to Ponyville' party for her at Applejack's that night. We all just ended up sleeping at her place."
"Nopony acted strange around her that night?" Celestia asked. Rainbow Dash shook her head. The next part of the story was far from a fond memory.
"Everypony thought that her ears, her eyes, and her wings were odd, but nopony acted like those things bothered them. Even Applejack's family seemed okay with her, so when I took her into town I didn't expect things to go south so quickly." Rainbow Dash stopped there. Princess Celestia had said she wanted to know as much as she could, but Dash did not want to go any further into detail.
"Please go on, Rainbow Dash. This part is very important to me. I can't help you if I don't understand what the problem is," Celestia said. Despite her prodding, Rainbow Dash continued to hesitate. She tried to distract herself by looking down at the foal, who she was surprised to find was wide awake. The little filly stared back up with her with two, golden irises and two, slitted pupils.
"Does she have a name?"
"H-huh?" Rainbow Dash looked up at the sound of Luna's voice. She suddenly became aware of the tears that were threatening to well up in her eyes, causing her to blink more often than usual.
"Have you given the little one a name yet?" Luna asked again. Rainbow Dash sniffled involuntarily and nodded. Luna smiled gently. "What is it?"
"Taboo, her name is Taboo," Rainbow Dash said.
"Aboo!" the filly responded at the sound of her name. Rainbow Dash chuckled, dislodging a few tears from her eyes. One of them fell right onto Taboo's nose. The filly crossed her eyes in an attempt to look at it, but started fussing when she could not determine what was touching her nose. Dash laughed a little more before wiping the droplet away. Before she could take her hoof away, Taboo reached up and grabbed it with her own little, stubby hooves.
"Aybo," she giggled. Rainbow Dash reached down and tickled Taboo's stomach, enticing more shrieking giggles from the foal. The ivory pillars and stained glass windows slipped out of her mind for a moment. The Princesses and all the ponies in Canterlot or Ponyville became distant memories. The Princesses could tell she was comfortable in some state of mind miles away, which made Celestia hesitant to interrupt the tender moment.
"Rainbow Dash." Princess Celestia brought Rainbow Dash back into the present. She looked back up at the monarchs, but continued playing with the foal. "You need to share the story with us, for her sake."
Dash's previous anxiety tried to rear back up, but she took a deep breath and remained calm.
"The trouble started when we went back into town that morning..."
"Stinky, stinky, stinky," Rainbow Dash held the loaded diaper as far away from herself as she could. She quickly flew over to the waste bin and plopped it in. She quickly dusted her hooves off, as if that were enough to remove any traces of the little filly's business from them.
"We're mighty lucky Pinkie Pie had some diapers on her. Celestia knows what we would've done without 'em," Applejack said. Pinkie beamed brightly as she continued repackaging the foal into a clean diaper. The sun had hardly risen when Taboo woke up and began crying, but the Apple family house had already been abuzz with activity. Even the guests were up and about, save for Rarity who insisted on getting a little more "beauty sleep".
"You never know when you'll need one!" Pinkie finished putting the diaper on Taboo. She promptly scooped the foal up and deposited it into Rainbow Dash's hooves. "There we go, nice and clean for mommy!"
"Pinkie Pie, I'd appreciate it if you'd just drop the whole 'mommy' bit," Rainbow Dash said. She had reiterated the point several times last night as well, but, just as she'd done back then, Pinkie Pie responded with with the same canned response.
"I still think you should keep her forever!" As excited as Pinkie looked, Rainbow Dash couldn't consent to that. She was only babysitting the foal until they could ascertain the whereabouts of her parents. Her agreement to take care of her depended heavily on the assumption that it was not a permanent arrangement.
"We've already discussed this Pinkie Pie," Twilight said, emerging from the kitchen with a tray of apples levitating beside her. Applebloom followed along behind her, balancing an ambitiously large tray of apples on her head. "We need to get her back to her parents. I'm writing to the Princess right when I get back to the library; she'll know what to do."
"That's right," Applejack said. "I can't stand the thought of that little filly's parents runnin' themselves ragged over their little girl." Everypony nodded in agreement as they gathered around the table. Big Macintosh lumbered in the front door and took a seat between Applejack and Applebloom without a single word. "Well, Mac, did ya get all the stuff out towards Dash's place?"
"Eeyup." Without saying anything else, the massive earth pony grabbed an apple and started eating, an action which prompted everypony else at the table to follow in suite.
"Alrighty then. Rarity, get in here an' have some breakfast!" Applejack called. It wasn't too long until the bedraggled form of the white unicorn emerged at the top of the stairs. She plopped her rear end down between Pinkie Pie and Fluttershy and then let her head drop onto the table. "Well, good mornin' to you too sunshine."
"What kind of crazy pony wakes up at this unruly hour?" Rarity asked as her hoof blindly searched for the food on the table. Fluttershy showed her friend some mercy and scooted an apple within her reach. Even then, it took her a moment to locate it.
"It ain't 'unruly' an' I'm up at this time everyday!" Applejack replied. Rarity lifted her face off the table and stared at her friend through bloodshot eyes.
"Case in point." Rarity levitated the apple and took a dainty bite out of it.
"Choo choo!" Pinkie Pie shouted, causing Rarity to nearly jump out of her seat. "Open wide, here comes the train!" The unicorn scowled at her friend, but Pinkie couldn't see her with her back turned. She continued inching a spoonful of applesauce closer to the foal squirming in Rainbow Dash's hooves.
"Lighten up, Rarity," Applejack said. "Y'all wouldn't be so tired if you went to sleep when the rest of us did. What were y'all doin' anyway?" Rarity took another bite of apple, but then smiled triumphantly.
"Oh, just making some adjustments to one of those old dolls you were lending Rainbow Dash," she said. Before anypony could ask specific details, Rarity went ahead and levitated the fruit of her labors over the table. The adjustment Rarity had made was quite obvious: she had added bat wings to the faded, tan pony's back. Twilight was the first to speak up.
"Wow, that was pretty thoughtful of you." Rarity beamed, soaking up the compliment.
"Aww, that's adorable," Fluttershy said.
"Eeyup." Big Macintosh covered up having said anything with a few feigned coughs.
"It's the least I could do, but I do believe it's a necessary possession for little Taboo." Rarity levitated the doll over to the foal, who automatically forgot all about eating to snatch up the floating doll before her.
"And once again, I need to remind you not to call her that," Twilight said. "Her name isn't Taboo, nor should it be Taboo." Twilight had insisted on that fact ever since Rarity had coined the name last night. Both Pinkie and Rarity had been discussing what to call the foal when Twilight pointed out they were in no position to name the foal and therefor the subject of what to call her was, quote, "taboo". The name stuck.
"Aw, c'mon Twilight! I like it!" Pinkie Pie said as she tried to reinvigorate Taboo's interest in eating food and not her doll's head.
"She already has a name, the one her parents gave her," Twilight stated.
"Well we can't just keep calling her 'the foal' or 'the filly'. I don't see the harm in just giving her a temporary name," Rarity said. Twilight rolled her eyes and took a large bite off an apple. Rather than argue her case again, she continued to slowly masticate the apple in order to excuse herself from speaking. In her stead, Fluttershy spoke up.
"Well, foals are very impressionable, so if we call her something else she might, uhm, think it's her name," she said. Rarity's eyes drifted away from the table.
"Well... what if her parents didn't name her?" Rarity asked. The table became quiet, save for Taboo who was gurgling happily with her doll's head mostly in her mouth. Rarity heaved a sigh and put her hooves on the table. "I think we've overlooked the possibility for far too long, girls. I don't think anypony forgets their daughter in a neat little basket out in the woods. What if she wasn't forgotten? What if she was just... left?"
"That's ridiculous!" Rainbow Dash shouted, slamming a free hoof onto the table. "Why would anypony do that?"
Rainbow Dash's' question is answered only by awkward silence. Everypony knew the answer was very simple, but none of them wanted to say it. No one wanted to be the one to say that anypony would abandon the foal because of her ears, eyes, or wings. No one at the table believed leaving the foal because of her anatomy was excusable, but they didn't want to believe it was even a possibility.
"Rarity's right, y'all," Applejack said, breaking the silence. "We've gotta account for the possibility that her parents aren't lookin' for her, for one reason or another." The comment didn't do anything to dispel the awkward air around the table.
"Well, we can't stick around here forever!" Rainbow Dash suddenly stood up and made towards the door with Taboo in tow. She strapped on the carrier that was waiting for her next to the exit.
"Wait, Rainbow Dash!" Rarity got up and followed after her with the rest of the group following closely behind. "You can't just fly off yet."
"Yeah! Taboo hasn't finished breakfast yet!" Pinkie Pie said. Dash finished putting on the carrier and placed Taboo inside. The foal whimpered under the stress of being moved so quickly, but clung fast to her doll.
"I've got to get busy putting all the kid stuff in my place, so I'd better get a move on," Rainbow Dash said. She opened up the door and walked out, but her friends kept on following. She spread her wings and took a few experimental flaps, checking to see if the carrier's harness got in the way of her wings.
"We've still got a lot to discuss," Twilight said. "If you wait a little longer, we could all go to your place together and help you." Rainbow Dash didn't turn to acknowledge the presence of her friends.
"I'd just feel better if I headed home now." Before anypony could protest further, Dash was already airborne and soaring away. Rainbow Dash didn't even hear Applejack call after her to take it slow. She streaked across the sky and, after a few minutes of soaring over Ponyville, landed outside her front door. She wandered over to the edge of her cloud stoop and peered down at the ground. Big Macintosh had indeed placed the cart of items she'd be needing under her home.
Rainbow Dash looked down at the foal strapped to her chest. Taboo was still clinging to her doll and looked pretty windblown, but she was smiling and giggling all the same. Rainbow Dash decided it would be best to try a quick experiment while she had control of the situation.
She removed Taboo from the carrier and slowly lowered her towards the cloud floor. When the filly's behind was in contact with the fluffy surface, Rainbow Dash carefully removed her hooves. She let out the breath she'd been holding in when the foal rested on the cloud without falling through. Dash chuckled to herself.
"See, you're just like any other pegasus," she said, picking Taboo back up and heading into her house. Dash's house was a cozy little place. Anypony who knew her well would say it's strangely well kept and clean, but that's only because Rainbow Dash didn't have too many worldly possessions. She had quite a few Wonderbolts posters strung about the rooms and the odd piece of Wonderbolt paraphernalia on a table or sitting on a windowsill. She kept her more personal affects in her closet upstairs. There was also her bed and her bookshelf where she kept all her Daring Do novels, but that was all there was upstairs aside from the bathroom. Downstairs her den and kitchen were pretty standard, keeping with the minimalist theme that ruled the rest of the house.
"Okay, stay here, Taboo," Rainbow Dash said to the foal, setting her down in the den. "Great, now Pinkie and Rarity have me doing it too."
"Aboo," Taboo replied. Rainbow Dash groaned and brought a hoof to her face.
"Aaaand now we've got you doing it."
"Aboo!" she squealed again. Dash pointed a hoof at Taboo.
"Right, stay here." Rainbow Dash zipped out the front door of her house and down to where Big Macintosh had put the cart. One by one, she started carrying the various items in the cart up to her house: a highchair, a crib, a playpen, a chest filled with Applebloom's old toys, and a bag containing various items such as diapers and food. Once she'd brought everything up, she moved everything to the spot it needed to be in her house. Once everything was in place, she returned to the den where Taboo was wrestling with her doll. Rainbow Dash glanced up at her Wonderbolts clock and noted that the task used up only ten minutes.
"See, I didn't need any help with that," she said as she flopped onto her couch. In reality, taking care of the foal stuff was just an excuse to get away from everypony. Rainbow Dash didn't want to explore the possibility of Taboo's parents not wanting her back. It was a reality that made her jumpy. Being unable to return Taboo to her parents didn't mean she automatically had to take care of her, but she was a candidate.
She looked over to where Taboo was playing on the floor. For a moment, she tried to imagine herself as the foal's mother. When she thought about her future, she had never envisioned things like having kids or getting married. All she wanted was to be a Wonderbolt. Something like starting a family would make it hard to follow that dream. She was still four years too young to be a Wonderbolt, but she still wanted to spend every moment up until that point training.
"It'll be fine. This is just for a week or so," Rainbow Dash said to assure herself. She continued to watch Taboo play from the couch, still curious about the filly's fate and history.
There was a knock on Rainbow Dash's door.
"It's open, come on in!" she shouted. She had just gotten Taboo to start eating lunch, so she didn't want to stop while she was on a roll. The door opened just as a spoonful of applesauce was about to go into Taboo's mouth. Curious, the filly suddenly turned towards the source of activity, causing the spoon to deposit part of its payload onto her cheek. Dash grunted and looked towards the door herself.
"Sorry to interrupt," Fluttershy said as she closed the door behind herself. "I see you moved all the stuff in."
"No big deal," Rainbow Dash said. She tried to reinvigorate Taboo's desire to eat, but the filly just kept staring up at Fluttershy. Nevertheless, Rainbow Dash didn't relent. "So, what's up?"
"Oh, well, the girls sent me. Princess Celestia responded to Twilight's letter," Fluttershy replied. Rainbow Dash slipped the spoonful of applesauce into Taboo's mouth.
"Really? That was fast," she said. She retracted the spoon and reloaded it while Taboo swallowed what was in her mouth. "What did she say?"
"Well, not much, really. She said she would put out word that a peculiar, lost foal was found outside of Ponyville, but nothing else," Fluttershy explained. Rainbow Dash deposited more applesauce into Taboo's open mouth.
"So the Princess didn't put anything in her response about why she might look the way she does?" Rainbow Dash asked. Fluttershy shook her head. "Maybe it's not as big of a deal as we think. Twilight said Princess Luna has ponies like Taboo in her guard, right? They'll find her parents in no time."
"Yes well..." Fluttershy shuffled her hooves. "Twilight wants to talk to you and, uhm, Pinkie Pie wants Taboo to come and play with the Cake twins, so Twilight said you should both come down to Sugarcube Corner."
Rainbow Dash couldn't figure out what Twilight might want to talk about at first, but it only took a brief moment of reflection for he to come up with a good guess. Twilight probably wanted to talk more extensively about Taboo being an orphan. As much as she wished she could just waltz around that possibility and avoid it, Twilight wouldn't let that happen.
"Fine, just let us finish up here," Rainbow Dash said as she fed another bit of applesauce to Taboo. "And since when have you been calling her Taboo?" Fluttershy grinned sheepishly and shuffled her hooves a little.
"I just, well, it's catchy and it just slips out. Even Twilight used it once or twice after you left," Fluttershy replied. Dash smiled as she scooped up more applesauce for Taboo.
"I bet Rarity's feeling pretty proud of herself." Rainbow Dash moved the spoon towards Taboo, who eagerly leaned forward and engulfed the spoon and its contents. After a few more spoonfuls, Rainbow Dash strapped the carrier back on, loaded Taboo in, and walked out the front door with Fluttershy. They were about to take off for Ponyville, but Taboo started crying all of a sudden. It only took one whiff of the air to determine what was ailing the little foal.
"I should probably change her first," Rainbow Dash said as she headed back into her house.
"Good idea." Fluttershy remained outside while Dash went inside and put Taboo into a clean diaper. Changing the squirming foal took all of five minutes and then it took Rainbow Dash another fifteen minutes to get her to stop crying. Rainbow finally exited her house and rejoined Fluttershy.
"Did everything go well?" Fluttershy asked. Rainbow Dash grinned and patted Taboo on the head.
"Nothing I couldn't handle. I had to foalsit worse brats back in Cloudsdale. C'mon, let's get going," Rainbow Dash said, spreading her wings and launching herself from her house. Fluttershy tripped off afterwards, struggling a bit to keep up with her more athletic friend as they headed towards their destination. Knowing that there would probably be a lot of ponies out near Sugarcube Corner at this hour, the pair of pegasi found a much less congested stretch of road a block away from the confectionery. They trotted the rest of the way from that point.
During the short walk to Sugarcube Corner's front door, Rainbow Dash couldn't shake the notion that everypony was staring in her direction. She confirmed with just a few glances to the side that the eyes of everypony around were following her as she walked. She shook it off, chalking it up to the fact that she had Taboo with her. She could understand why everypony would want to know what she was doing with the foal.
Rainbow Dash pushed the door to Sugarcube Corner open, chiming the bell and alerting the shops patrons to her entry.
"There you are! We've been waiting forever!" Pinkie Pie said as she materialized right in front of Dash. Without another word, she picked up Taboo and hopped off with her to the upper floor of the shop. Dash and Fluttershy stood in a bit of a daze until Mr. Cake approached them from behind the counter.
"Sorry about that," he said. "Pinkie's been pretty excited since I casually mentioned that the new foal should have a play date with the twins."
"Oh, it's no biggie," Rainbow Dash replied. She glanced absentmindedly over her shoulder. Some of the other ponies in the shop looked somewhat subdued. They talked amongst each other in hushed tones, occasionally looking over at or gesturing to the stairs Pinkie had just left by.
"If you're looking for Twilight and Rarity, they're sitting over by the window," Mr. Cake said. Rainbow Dash thanked him and trotted over to the table in question with Fluttershy. Twilight and Rarity looked up as the two pegasi approached.
"Where's Tab-I mean, the foal?" Twilight asked. Rarity failed to repress a smug smile and snicker, causing Twilight to shoot her a glare.
"Pinkie took her upstairs," Dash replied.
"Did she now?" Rarity said. "I wanted to see her before Pinkie got her hooves on her. I've prepared another little gift for her." Rarity levitated a blue headband over the table.
"What's that for?" Rainbow Dash asked. Rarity smiled and got up from the table.
"I just thought it would look cute on her. I'm going to find out how I'm right," Rarity said as she started towards the stairs. Twilight cocked her head to the side.
"Don't you mean 'find out if I"m right?'" she asked. Rarity just laughed.
"Darling, there is no 'if' when it comes to my judgements on fashion." Rarity smiled even wider as she took the stairs one dainty step at a time. Twilight rolled her eyes and turned to Fluttershy.
"You should go with her. I'd like to talk to Rainbow Dash alone," she said. Fluttershy nodded and trotted off. Sighing, Rainbow Dash got out of the carrier's harness and took a seat across from Twilight. "Did you get all the stuff moved in?"
"Yeah, I got it done," Dash said. The store's bell rang as a few ponies trotted into the store.
"Do you wanna tell me why you were in such a hurry to get out of AJ's this morning?" Twilight asked. Rainbow Dash looked away and waved the question off with her hoof.
"I don't know what you're talking about. Where's Applejack anyway?" Rainbow Dash tried to divert the conversation, but Twilight was already wise to her ways.
"She has work to do. Listen, Rainbow Dash, we need to talk about what we're going to do in the event we don't find the foal's parents," Twilight said. The store's bell rang once again as another group of ponies sauntered in. The idle chatter at the store's tables grew louder.
"But we're gonna find her parents, right?" Rainbow Dash asked, attempting to discourage the conversation once more. Twilight forged ahead anyway.
"In the event that we don't find them, we need to have a plan of action ready. I think you know what that means for you as her current caretaker, right?" Twilight leaned in closer and furrowed her brow to let Dash know she wasn't getting away from this conversation. Twilight couldn't pin down exactly what was bugging Rainbow Dash, but she figured it would be better to lay it out on the table right now. Already though, Rainbow Dash was looking pretty nervous.
"Uh, I dunno what you mean Twilight," Dash lied. She knew exactly what Twilight meant.
"Well, allow me to elaborate," Twilight said as she leaned back into her seat. "It could take us a while to find Taboo's parents. When you agreed to take care of her, you said you understood that it could take anywhere from a few days to a few months. No matter how long it takes, you're ready to take care of her, right?"
"Yeah, of course!" Rainbow Dash replied. She knew full well what she was getting into when she agreed to take care of Taboo. Especially now that the foal was in her care, she wasn't about to kick the little foal to the curb if the search for her parents was taking too long. The store's bell kept ringing as the sound of the surrounding voices grew to a dull roar. Dash notices Twilight glancing over at the unusually large group of ponies in the store.
"So, what do you plan on doing in the event that, for whatever reason, we're ultimately unable to return Taboo to her parents?" Twilight asked. Rainbow Dash had trouble hearing the question over the hubbub the crowd was raising. The unusual spectacle was drawing her attention away from her own conversation, and she could tell Twilight was wondering what's going on as well.
"Settle down, everypony!" Mr. Cake said. "What's all the commotion about?" The question caused the crowd to clamor even louder and bunch up around the counter. Mr. Cake kept shouting for them to quiet down and talk one at a time, but it wasn't doing any good. Before the situation could escalate any further, Rainbow Dash flew out of her seat and landed on the counter.
"Be quiet!" she shouted. The roar of the crowd turned into a murmur as the pegasus took control of the situation. "Does anypony care to explain what's going on here?"
"We wanna know what that thing was," somepony said. Rainbow Dash leered into the crowd and flicked her tail.
"What thing?" she asked. The crowd murmured a little more, but Rainbow Dash could hear the things they were staying. Everypony was having trouble coming up with a description for what they'd seen, but somepony finally stepped forward with an answer.
"We wanna know what that thing you came in here with was!" the pony said. Rainbow Dash figured they weren't talking about Fluttershy, so that left only one pony.
"You mean Taboo?" Rainbow Dash's question reignited the crowd. All at once they shouted out different questions. Dash yelled back, but this time her voice was lost in the din of the multitude. It looked like there was no end to the shouting match, but a voice far louder than anypony else's sliced through the noise.
"Enough!" Everypony fell silent as they turned to see the white unicorn descending the stairs. "I don't know what's going on, but you all better clear out of here!" Once she arrived at the bottom of the stairs, Rarity began herding the crowd towards the door. There was a chorus of protests, but Rarity wouldn't have any of it. Slowly yet surely, each pony who wasn't in the store to buy pastries was forced out. Rarity slammed the door behind them with a huff.
"Wow, good job," Twilight said while she wandered over to her friend with Rainbow Dash. Through the windows, she could see the crowd hadn't dispersed yet. Their loud chatter could be heard through the walls of the store.
"Honestly, what was all that? All the noise was bothering the foals," Rarity said, still fuming with anger. The best Twilight could offer as an explanation was a shrug.
"I think it had something to do with Taboo," Rainbow Dash said. "They asked me what 'thing' I came in here with." Rarity got awfully quiet. Her rage subsided all at once.
"Dash, did they use that word, 'thing'?" she asked. Rainbow Dash didn't know what was going through Rarity's head, but she went along with it and nodded. Rarity took a shaky breath in through her nose and slowly let it out. "Oh, I was worried something like this might happen."
"Something like what?" Rainbow Dash asked. Rarity's concern was written all over her face.
"I was worried the other ponies in town might not be very... receptive of Taboo," she said. Rainbow Dash furrowed her brow and cocked her head.
"That's ridiculous. Why would they get so worked up over her?" Dash asked, but she didn't give Rarity time to answer. "If they want to meet her so bad, I'll just take her out there." She turned and started off towards the stairs, but Rarity cut her off.
"Hold on Rainbow Dash, I don't know if you want to do that right now. Let me go out there and talk to them first!" Rarity said. Rainbow Dash grunted and trotted on past, but found Twilight Sparkle standing in her path.
"I think you should listen to her, Dash. You know how some of the Ponyville citizens can get about these things," she said. Once again, Rainbow Dash didn't pay her friends any mind. She went on past them and up the stairs to where Pinkie and Fluttershy were watching the foals play.
"Hey Dashie! Did Rarity take care of all those shouting ponies downstairs?" Pinkie asked.
"Yeah, she did. I need Taboo for a minute or two," Dash said. Pinkie Pie didn't have much say in the matter as Rainbow Dash scooped up the filly without another word. She turned and left the room with the filly in her foreleg. Rainbow Dash showed very little concern for the Taboo's whimpers and squirms of protest. She didn't stop to admire the navy headband she was wearing or notice how nicely she'd been playing with the cake twins.
Rainbow Dash just marched back down the stairs with Taboo, out the front door of Sugarcube Corner, and into the jaws of the crowd.
"So, what happened then?" Celestia asked. Rainbow Dash didn't respond. She cast her eyes to the floor and shook her head. "That bad, huh?" Rainbow Dash nodded and spoke up.
"I couldn't believe some of the things they said. They called her a monster, a freak. They told me I should've just left her in the Everfree. Since then, I can't show head or hoof in public without getting ridiculed." Rainbow Dash fought back more tears. Princess Celestia looked over at her sister for a moment. Luna had a hoof to her mouth, a sign that she was deep in thought. Celestia got up from her throne and approached Rainbow Dash.
"I understand it's a painful memory, but we need to know whatever you're willing to tell us." Celestia placed a reassuring hoof on Rainbow Dash's shoulder. She looked down at Taboo, who had slipped back into a peaceful sleep during the story. Rainbow Dash sniffled a little, but collected herself to say a little more.
"Rumors about Taboo spread faster than we could hope to suppress. They all said the same thing: Taboo is some sort of monster who'll grow up and just cause trouble. Some of them think she's already capable of causing trouble. They don't give her a chance and they treat me like some sort of villain for defending her.," Rainbow Dash said, her voice wavering as her explanation grew. Luna rose from her throne and joined her sister before Rainbow Dash.
"Is it only words those ponies use?" Luna asked. Rainbow Dash shook her head.
"None of the vendors in town will give me any business, not that it really matters. I don't have any money since I got kicked off the weather patrol. Without my friends' help, I'd be sunk. They can't stop the pegasi that come around my house just to jeer. I thought after the first few days they'd just get tired of it, but they only got worse as the week wore on. This morning I heard the voices of ponies I didn't recognize outside my door. I panicked. I grabbed Taboo and just flew out my bedroom window. I didn't have a destination in mind, so I ended up coming here. Again... sorry for just barging in."
Celestia and Luna processed the story for a while. The siblings looked to one another for advice on how to proceed. They knew it would be unwise to descend upon Ponyville and simply force its citizens to comply because that would just stir up more unrest. Celestia, confident in her wisdom, was the first to speak up.
"We can't force the citizens of Ponyville to change their opinions, but we can discourage them from harassing you and Taboo. I'll assign a pegasus in the Royal Guard to keep watch over you during the day."
"And I will lend you a soldier from my own guard to keep watch over you in the night," Luna said. "You need not fear the scorn of the other ponies."
"However, the task of showing the world that they don't need to fear Taboo falls upon whoever decides to raise her. Normally, that would be the filly's parents, but we still haven't found them," Celestia said. She made sure Rainbow Dash was making eye contact with her before asking her next question. "Can I trust you with that task for the time being?"
Rainbow Dash thought back on the past week. She never knew the ponies in her own hometown were capable of hating so fiercely. There were so many things about her daily life she had taken for granted. She missed the days she could walk through town without feeling everypony's eyes watching her. She never knew how convenient it was to be able to go to the market and buy what she needed herself.
On the other hoof though, she learned a great deal more about her friends. Even at the risk of their own reputations, they defended her and helped her out. They loaned her money, they brought her food, and they just stopped by the house just to have an idle conversation. Even if it was only to silence the constant pleas from Pinkie Pie, The Cakes still let Taboo play with Pound and Pumpkin, but only behind closed doors. Rainbow Dash never saw the end of the lengths her friends were willing to go for her. She was certain she wouldn't have made it through the week without them.
She didn't strive to make it through for herself, though. For whatever reason, she did it for Taboo. In the small amount of time she'd known the little filly, Taboo had managed to steal Rainbow Dash's heart. Perhaps it was the contrast of the innocence inside innocence against the overwhelming avarice coming from outside that made her so endearing. Rainbow Dash would give anything to see little Taboo grow up and be happy.
"I'll take care of her. Even if you never find her parents, I'll take care of her until she's ready to take care of herself, and she will be ready to take care of herself. I'll make sure of it." Rainbow Dash maintained eye contact throughout her declaration. There wasn't a doubt in Celestia's mind that Rainbow Dash would ever think of abandoning Taboo now; that would fly in the face of the very element of loyalty Rainbow Dash was meant to represent.
"Then for the time being you are Taboo's legal guardian." Princess Celestia lowered her head and touched her horn to Rainbow Dash's forehead. It was only a ritualistic gesture, but it made the whole thing a little more real for Rainbow Dash. Princess Celestia backed up and smiled warmly down at her. "I'll arraign for a carriage to take you back to Ponyville along with your escort."
"Uh, wait a sec," Dash said. She looked down at Taboo a moment. "If I'm going to be taking care of Taboo, there's some ponies who need to know about it."
Rainbow Dash knocked twice on the cloud door of the quaint little cloud home she knew so well. She was a little worried she'd draw attention to Taboo on her way through Cloudsdale, but the escort Celestia had prepared managed to speed her to the quieter, rural side of Cloudsdale before they bumped into any large crowds. Standing at the doorway of her destination, she only anticipated seeing two other ponies.
"Who is it?" somepony said in a female, sing-song voice from inside the house. The door swung in, revealing an older pegasus mare with the same mane and tail as Rainbow Dash. The two would have been mirror images if it weren't for the older mare's indigo coat. Upon seeing Dash, her eyes lit up. "Dashie!"
"Hey, mom," Rainbow Dash said, smiling back up at her mother. Dash's mother smiled even wider. She ducked back inside and called into the house.
"Birdie! Come down here. We have company," she said.
"Not now, Palette! I think I'm onto something here!" a male voice replied.
"It's your daughter, Birdbrain," Palette shouted back. The effect was instantaneous. After a series of bangs and crashes, an older pegasus stallion came galloping frantically down the stairs in a streak of blue. He skidded to a halt in front of the door. A huge grin crossed the stallion's moustachioed visage.
"Hey dad," Rainbow Dash managed to say in the moment before she was smothered with a bear hug from her father.
"Oh, how I've missed you Rainy! You've gotten so big since I last saw you! How long has it been? Two months? One month? My, your mane is longer too, or at least it's longer than your mother's. You look like you're in good shape, are you still working out regularly? Have I told you I love you?" The stallion continued to rattle off questions until he detected there was something off about the hug he was, or rather wasn't, receiving. He backed off momentarily and examined his daughter. He noticed that she was clutching something close to her chest. When he realized what that something was, his brain shut off.
"Oh my... who's this?" Palette asked. Rainbow Dash cleared her throat and shifted Taboo so her parents could see her more clearly.
"This is Taboo and... well, she's technically your granddaughter."
After Rainbow Dash retold her story for the second time in a day over a cup of tea in her parents' den, things weren't near as tense as they were previously. Dash and her mother had fallen into idle conversation while her father played with an increasingly nervous Taboo. Rainbow Dash decided to intervene before her father had her bawling.
"Dad, could you play with her normally?" she asked. Her father didn't move from where he was crouched on the floor with Taboo sitting before him.
"What're you saying, Rainy? I used to play with you like this all the time!" he said. He proceeded to demonstrate the game once more. He extended one of his wings just within reach of Taboo's little hooves. While she was busy focusing on that, he extended his other wing and tickled the back of her neck. Taboo would then direct her attention to the other wing, but Dash's father would then tickle the back of her neck with the original wing he was teasing her with. Thusly, the cycle continued. The flustered Taboo could not wrap her head around what was touching the back of her neck.
"Aww, poor baby. C'mere." Palette intervened and scooped up Taboo. "Did mean 'ol Birdbrain upset you? There, there." She soothed the foal as she rocked it back and forth. Taboo whimpered and snuggled closer to the mare's breast.
"Please tell me you didn't actually do that when I was little, dad," Rainbow Dash said. Her father got up and gave her as innocent as a smile as he could manage. Rainbow Dash just chuckled and shook her head. "So, what's new with you?"
"Ah, nothing new, really. Teaching at Cloudsdale University is the same as ever and the world of mathematica is just as it's always been," he said. Rainbow Dash grinned.
"Didn't you say you were going to stir things up in the world of mathematica? Whatever happened to that?" she asked. Her father rolled his eyes and grunted like he always did before he started one of his speeches.
"I'm trying my hardest, I really am. I've still got classes to teach and meetings to attend, so I don't have much time to riddle out the mysteries of the world. I wish I had more time, but there's not much a stallion can do. I could quit my job, but then I wouldn't have anyone to show my findings to. I could show them to you or your mother, but I neither of you appreciate the beauty of mathematics quite like I do."
"Birdie, no one appreciates the beauty of mathematics quite like you do," Palette said. "Now, I won't have you spoil Dashie's visit with stuffy university talk. There are far more important things to talk about, like if there's any stallion back home Dashie has her eyes on."
"Mom?!" Rainbow Dash hadn't seen this avenue of conversation coming, but she wanted to see it gone, quickly. "I think I'd rather have stuffy university talk."
"Oh, come now Rainy. Your mother and I were just about your age when we met," Birdie said as he walked over to join is wife. "I almost feel bad for saying it, but your mother being bad at math is the best thing that ever happened to me." Palette giggled as Birdie gave her a playful nuzzle.
"Mmhmm, yes. All those nights alone in my room... studying." Palette nuzzled her spouse back as they shared a knowing giggle. Rainbow Dash wanted to throw up.
"If you two are going to be all lovey-dovey, at least let me hold Taboo," she said. Palette complied and handed over the now sleepy foal to her daughter, but went right back to cuddling up against her husband. Rainbow Dash heaved a sigh as she cradled Taboo back and forth. "Ugh... why the sudden interest in my love life?" Dash asked.
"Well, usually ponies get hitched before they have kids," Birdie replied. "Now that you're going to be responsible for Taboo, you may find yourself inadvertently wondering if the stallions around you would make good fathers."
"Believe me, Dashie," Palette said. "If there was ever any doubt that your father was the colt for me, I forgot them all when I saw how good he was with you. There's something incredibly attractive about somepony who treats your child right. Who knows? Maybe you'll see somepony playing with Taboo, but you'll be wanting them to play wi-"
"I'm going to have to stop you right there, mom," Rainbow Dash said. "I wasn't looking to adopt a foal; I just ended up with one due to some pretty wild circumstances. I'm not looking for a stallion."
"Well, having a stallion around might help you raise Taboo," Palette said. Rainbow Dash snorted and flicked her tail. She had been expecting one of them to say something along those lines.
"I don't need a stallion to help me. My friends are all the support I need," Dash said. Her parents smiled and just stared at her for a little while. Rainbow Dash starting feeling a little uncomfortable. "W-what?"
"We're proud of you, Dash," her father said.
"And we love you very much," her mother added. Rainbow Dash's mouth scrunched up as she tried to hold back a smile. The foal in her hooves yawned and snuggled in closer to her breast, sleeping just as sound as she always would. For just a little longer, the family basked in silent serenity.
It was late when Rainbow Dash returned home. She was relieved to find her house just as she left it aside from a note her friends had left her. It said that Princess Celestia explained what had happened in a letter, so they waited up for her to return home; however, it got too late and they all returned home. The letter insisted that they all get together first thing tomorrow. Rainbow Dash folded the note up and left it where she found it in her den. She took off the foal carrier and put Taboo to bed. She wasn't quite ready to go to sleep herself, so she wandered back into her den and flopped onto her couch.
She stared up at the armored pegasus standing in the middle of the room with a stoic look on his face.
"So... you're the guy who's supposed to protect Taboo and me?" she asked. The guard nodded. "Just you? You aren't going to get swapped out or anything?"
"No, ma'am. I'll be here from sun up 'till sundown. Princess Luna has assigned one of her fliers to keep watch from sundown to sunup," the guard said. Rainbow Dash glanced out the window. The sun was just about under the horizon.
"Alright, cool. In the future, though, you don't need to call me ma'am. Rainbow Dash or Dash is fine. I don't really care for all the formalities," Dash said. The guard nodded slowly.
"Very well, if that would make you more comfortable," he said, speaking in a way that sounded much more free to Dash.
"Do you have a name?" she asked.
"Hastae," the guard replied. "Uh, also, my shift is pretty much up. I've got to get back to Canterlot, so I'll see you bright and early tomorrow." The guard turned and started out the door.
"How quickly will your replacement get here?" Dash asked after him. Hastae stopped and scanned the sky for a moment.
"Very soon. Good night." With his good-bye, Hastae closed Rainbow Dash's door behind him. Dash heard him as he spread his wings and took off. The sun finished setting over the horizon, throwing the inside of the house into darkness.
Rainbow Dash heard something land outside her house. She listened to the sound of wings beating for a moment, but then she caught a glimpse of something golden shining outside one of her windows. It's sudden appearance and disappearance made her heart almost jump out of her chest. She had to remind herself that it was just the night guard sent by Luna.
Part of her wanted to go out and examine the guard. According to Twilight and Luna, he should have the same features as Taboo. He should have the same wings, the same ears, and the same eyes. Even if it was just a sort of magical disguise, she wanted some sort of idea about what Taboo would grow up into.
Rainbow Dash dismissed herself from looking, telling herself she'd better get to sleep. She told herself there would be plenty of opportunities to sneak a peek at the night guard. He would, in theory, be there every night until things in Ponyville calmed down. Rainbow Dash decided there were more important things to focus on than the similarities between the guard outside and the foal she was caring for.
She curled up into her bed, but as she did so she had to admit felt a little more relaxed knowing that there was somepony out there making sure she and Taboo were safe.
Even so, somepony threw a rock through her window that night.
"No news? Is that so?" Rarity didn't look up from the dress she was hemming. Rainbow Dash continued staring up at the ceiling from Rarity's fainting couch.
"Yeah. Twilight wrote the Princess, but there still hasn't been any progress in the search," Dash said. She glanced over to where Pinkie Pie, Applebloom, and Sweetie Belle were playing with Taboo.
"Can you say your name, Taboo? Taaaboooooo." Sweetie Belle prolonged the consonants to aid the foal.
"Aboo."
"Tuh-Aaaah-Booooo," Applebloom said.
"Aboo!" Taboo insisted on her own pronunciation. Pinkie Pie hoisted her up as high as she could reach and smiled up at the foal.
"How about Pinkie Pie? Can you say Pinkie Pie? The Cakes can, can you? Pinkie Pie? Pinkie Pie?" she asked faster than Taboo could process, but the filly just smiled and giggled. "Piiiin-kuh-eeeeee Puh-aaaaaaaye."
"Ee-aye!" Taboo replied. Pinkie Pie set her back down and tried a few more times to get her to say "Pinkie Pie", but Taboo soon became too amused with the mare's delivery of the word to reply. She rolled onto her back and laughed merrily.
"Well, that's just too bad," Rarity said as she finished what she was working on. She levitated the dress over to one of her mannequins and admired her work. "You'd think after a month of searching that something would turn up."
"You'd think." Rainbow Dash turned onto her belly so she could keep a closer eye on Pinkie Pie and the fillies. She noticed Hastae watching them too as he stood guard by the boutique's door. His vigilance stood as a constant reminder of why Rainbow Dash was so tired: just being in town was a labor. Even if nopony said or did anything with Hastae around, she could feel them staring at her and Taboo. It made her worry, and all the worrying she was doing was wearing her thin. "You guys aren't teaching her any weird words, are you?"
"We're not," Applebloom said. "But Ah think Pinkie is."
"Can you say pumpernickel? Puuum-puh-eeeeerrrrnnniiiii-kuh-eeel! Pumpernickel!" Pinkie stared at the filly expectantly. Taboo thought a moment before responding.
"Aboo!" Taboo raised her stubby hooves in victory.
"I think Taboo's vocabulary is safe for now," Rarity said. "By the way, Sweetie Belle, where's Scootaloo? If I remember correctly, she hasn't come to see Taboo yet. Did you or Applebloom tell Scootaloo Taboo would be here today?"
"We did, but she said she had to go do something," Sweetie Belle replied. Rainbow Dash cocked an eyebrow.
"Just 'something?' Any idea what that something is?" she asked. Sweetie Belle shook her head, but Applebloom spoke up and offered a suggestion.
"She's been goin' off with Rumble 'n Featherweight, so Ah reckon it has something to do with flyin'." Rainbow Dash smiled and turned onto her back again.
"It's good to see she's finally getting some help. Most fillies her age are already flying." Rainbow Dash stared up at the ceiling and thought for a moment. "Do you think I could make money giving flying lessons?"
"I don't think the mothers of Ponyville would be too keen on that right now," Rarity replied. "Do you have enough to get through the week, darling? I could always le-"
"Rarity, I've got enough, really," Rainbow Dash said, cutting yet another offer of money from her friend. Although she'd never explicitly said so, it was no secret that Rainbow Dash really didn't like having to relying on her friends for money so much. She didn't like having to rely on them so much period, but for Taboo's sake she spent the last month swallowing her pride.
"I'm sorry Rainbow Dash, but until we can find some sort of job for you this is the way it has to be. I know Applejack has been asking around, so all we can do is wait." Rarity removed her work from the mannequin and brought it back to her workbench.
"Seems like all I do is wait!" Rainbow Dash said, too tired to care if she was complaining. "I want to stop waiting for something to happen and just have something happen!"
The door swung open and the boutique's bell rang. Rarity spun around with an award winning smile, but faltered before she could extend her warm greeting due to the unusual nature of the pony at the door.
"Big Macintosh? ... Is it safe to assume you're not here to buy a dress?" Rarity asked the farm pony as he stood in the door.
"Eeyup," he answered.
"Then why are you here?" Applebloom asked. Big Macintosh stepped aside without a word and let the pony who was behind him step into the boutique.
"I hope I'm not interrupting anything." The rosy maned mare walked with her head low and with a weak smile on her face. The moment she crossed the threshold, Rainbow Dash got on her hooves and advanced on her.
"You've got a lot of nerve coming here right now, Roseluck." Rainbow Dash scowled at the mare, causing her to shrink even lower to the floor. "Your chums Lily and Daisy look like they're having a lot of fun when they're telling me to get out of town. You should have brought them with you, you know? We could've made a whole party out of this." Nopony else dared speak up. Not even Pinkie Pie perked up at the mention of a party. Even Taboo quieted down to watch the two mares.
Roseluck mumbled something.
"What was that?" Rainbow Dash took another step towards Roseluck. She almost heard a second, but stopped when she heard Roseluck sobbing.
"I'm sorry!" Roseluck said, rearing up all of a sudden and wrapping her forehooves around Rainbow Dash. Dash's brain went into overtime trying to figure out what was going on, so all she could do in reaction was reluctantly pat the sobbing mare's back a few times. She continued to apologize, but until she calmed down she wasn't able to clarify what she was apologizing for. Rainbow Dash and Rarity led her over to the fainting couch and let her sit down. After a minute more of sobbing, Roseluck finally got around to explaining herself.
"I came here to apologize for all the things my friends said about you or the filly. It didn't feel right to me... in fact, I know it wasn't right. It was just easier to just follow the crowd because I was afraid of what would happen if I sympathized with you when my friends were against you so strongly," she said. Rainbow Dash shuffled on her hooves nervously. She had always imagined the moment a pony confessed like this would be a moment of triumph for her, but right now she didn't feel like gloating about anything.
"Hey, the things your friends said weren't your fault," she said, but Roseluck shook her head.
"No, no, no. I should have spoken up. I should have done something about it right from the start, but I didn't raise a hoof. I knew it was wrong, but I still let it happen. I could have done something to stop them, but I just allowed them to make your lives miserable. I'm so sorry, and I'm ready to do anything to make it up to you, to both of you. I can't go on pretending like I don't know what's going on." Roseluck looked up into Rainbow Dash's eyes as she started to well up with tears again. Dash wanted to yell at her a bit, tell her that she didn't have a right to cry right now. Roseluck wasn't the one who had to endure all the taunting and intimidation. Roseluck wasn't the one who would have to keep putting up with it all.
Rainbow Dash stole a glance over towards Taboo. Taboo was watching her intently.
"If you're really sorry... then I forgive you." No sooner had the words left Rainbow Dash's mouth than their effect became apparent on Roseluck's face. Her eyes lit up and a smile flew across her face.
"Really?!" she asked, jumping off the couch and placing her hooves on Rainbow Dash's shoulders.
"Y-yeah." Dash found herself pulled into an awkward hug as Roseluck broke into a fit of sobbing gratitude. Rainbow Dash returned the gesture the best she could. She glanced over at Rarity, searching for confirmation that she'd done the right thing. Rarity, reading the terribly obvious look on Dash's face, smiled and nodded. After a few more seconds of the awkward embrace, Roseluck wiped away her tears and put on a resolute face.
"Don't worry, Rainbow Dash! I'm going to make it up to you! Big Macintosh told me how the weather patrol just booted you out. That was the last straw, so I'd like to offer you a job," she said. Rainbow Dash's eyes lit up.
"Seriously?" Dash asked.
"I'm completely serious." Roseluck's confirmation caused a small squeal of joy to escape Rainbow Dash's mouth. "Ever since I won that flower competition in Canterlot a few months ago, I've been getting delivery requests from several different places. I've been mailing them the old fashioned way, but I've had an astounding increase in broken flower pots since I started using them. If I had my own delivery pony, that would save me a lot of worry. You're honestly the fastest pegasus I know, so if you're willing-"
"Oh I'm willing alright!" Rainbow Dash said, breaking right into Roseluck's speech. She flared her wings and puffed out her chest. "Say hello to your new delivery pony." Roseluck giggled and nodded.
"Then it's settled." Rainbow Dash flew up in the air and whooped.
"Congratulations on your new job Rainbow Dash," Rarity said. Rainbow Dash swooped down from the ceiling and landed next to her friend.
"Thanks! I'll pay you back every last bit soon enough, I promise!" Rainbow Dash said. She sealed her promise with a defiant stamp of her hoof.
"Just focus on feeding Taboo, alright?" Rarity replied. Sweetie Belle and Applebloom circled around Rainbow Dash and smiled up at her.
"That was amazing Rainbow Dash!" Applebloom said. Rainbow Dash cocked an eyebrow and looked down at the fillies.
"What was amazing?" she asked. Sweetie Belle began jumping up and down as she squeaked out the answer.
"You were wishing something would happen to help you out, and then it happened! Do you think you could do that with our Cutie Marks?" Sweetie Belle asked. Both fillies huddled up at gave Rainbow Dash the biggest puppy dog eyes they could manage. For a brief second, Rainbow Dash tried to riddle out how she'd done it before she remembered she didn't actually know any such magic. She was about to clarify that for the two fillies, but Pinkie Pie bounded in front of them with Taboo in her forehooves.
"Congratuuuuuuulations, Dashie! I'm gonna throw a big party to celebrate your new job! I'll invite everypony!" Pinkie said. Rainbow Dash chuckled while she gave Taboo a pat on the head.
"I don't know if everypony will show up, Pinkie," she said. Pinkie Pie considered that for a second, but dismissed it as nonsense. She hoisted Taboo up to eye level with Rainbow Dash.
"Say congratulations to mommy, Taboo!" Pinkie said. Rainbow Dash stopped her before she could say "congratulations" phonetically.
"Pinkie Pie, I keep telling you to stop calling me-"
"Mommy!" All the ponies in the boutique fell silent. It was a few seconds before Rarity finally spoke up.
"Did Taboo just call you 'mommy'... Rainbow Dash?" she asked, vocalizing the question on everypony's mind.
"Nonononono! She was just repeating what Pinkie said! She doesn't think I'm her-" Rainbow Dash was cut off by Taboo's little hooves grabbing her face.
"Mommy!" Taboo said once more. Rainbow Dash stared back into Taboo's little eyes while Applebloom, Sweetie Belle, and Roseluck gave three resounding "awws." The wheels in Rainbow Dash's head stopped turning as if the hamsters running in them had all suddenly taken ill.
"Is that her first word?" Roseluck asked. Rainbow Dash managed to nod, but Pinkie gave a much more animated answer.
"It's her first reeeeal word, but she's said plenty of made up ones!" Pinkie pulled the foal in close and spun around. "Her second real word has to be Pinkie! Can you say Pinkie?" Pinkie stopped spinning and looked down at Taboo. Instead of parroting her words, Taboo groveled and squirmed in her hooves.
"Mommy!" Taboo called out to Rainbow Dash. She managed to squirm all the way around and reach out for Dash. Rainbow Dash quickly trotted over and took Taboo into her hooves. Taboo wiggled up against her chest, letting out a little yawn once she got comfortable. All the mares "awwed" in unison, but quietly as not to disturb the tender scene.
"Eeyup," Big Macintosh added. Rainbow Dash had already tuned everypony around her out. She was far too preoccupied with the bundle of fur and thin wings in her hooves.
"Well... I hope your real mommy doesn't mind," she said.
8
“No. Let me down.”
“Dude, we’re not letting you down before you fess up.”
“This doesn’t change anything. I’m not telling any of you about it.”
“That’s not fair dude.”
“I’m not the one who rigged a trip wire in the middle of the barracks. I appreciate the effort, but once a superior officer sees me hanging from the ceiling it’ll be over,” Thunderhead said, glaring at his fellow guards from his position on the ceiling. The sun was up and he just wanted to get some sleep, but once again the ponies who were supposed to be his comrades were causing him trouble. He glared right at Sprout, who seemed to be the ringleader. “Whose idea was this even?”
“It was mine,” a voice said as a hooded figure emerged from the shadows. It seemed like a rather dramatic and menacing entrance considering the situation, but once the pony pulled back her hood it became clear why such bravado was used.
“Princess Luna?!”
“I desire to know the details as well, Sergeant Thunderhead,” the princess of the night said, throwing off the rest of her cloak. She was wearing puppy print pajamas underneath, suggesting she was supposed to be sleeping herself. It wouldn’t be clear to an outsider why Luna would show up in such a guise among her guards, but the present company had already become accustomed to how her often outlandish habits clashed with her serious demeanor. The trip-wire trap she had rigged up was a prime example. “It was I who provided that this may come to pass, so you will deliver a report on your recent progress.”
“I’m not supposed to discuss the details of my assignment with the others,” Thunderhead said, reminding Luna of her own policy. “I’m not supposed to discuss it with anypony but you.”
“Then I give you my permission to tell anypony you wish,” Luna said, not one to be denied what she wanted. “Things around the castle have been rather boring as of late, so I wish to hear of your activities. I believe they may amuse me.”
“With all due respect, Princess Luna, I’d rather not talk about it. This is my personal life we’re talking about.” Thunderhead couldn’t believe he was having this conversation with the Princess of all ponies. His life wasn’t some kind of soap opera for her to watch and enjoy.
“I can understand your hesitation… but I do not really care. You will tell me what I want to know.” As previously stated, Luna was not to be denied. “State for the record officially whether you and Rainbow Dash are an item!”
“Is that all you want to know?”
“Just tell us this one thing,” Luna said, crossing her heart. “You will be released afterwards.”
“C’mon man, just tell us,” Sprout said, imploring him to speak. Others joined in, kindly asking him to answer just one question. Thunderhead heaved a sigh. He couldn’t very well sleep upside down.
“Yeah, me and Rainbow Dash are an item.”
“Ah-ha! I knew it!” Luna cheered with a chorus of oohs and aahs from the other guards. “Tell us the details!”
“You said you would release me if I answered that question!”
“I have changed my mind!” Luna shouted, rocking the poor stallion from where he hung. “There are many facets of your relationship that fascinate me. Your time together is very limited, so how are you dealing with that?”
“Night after night alone with her,” Sprout shouted up at him. “I think I know how they’re spending time.” The crowd made some very suggestive noises, taunting Thunderhead.
“This is ridiculous! I’m not going to tell you guys about that stuff!”
“Your Princess demands it!” Luna got the crowd riled up and soon the din they were making was becoming unbearable. Thunderhead felt himself turning red, never having been one to kiss and tell. His relationship with Rainbow Dash was probably the strangest he’d ever had, but not altogether disagreeable. He hadn’t actually talked to anypony about it, but maybe it was time to change that. Even if these guys were just looking for juicy details, it couldn’t hurt to get some outside opinions on it.
“Alright, alright. I’ll tell you,” Thunderhead said, calming the crowd down. The guards and Princess quickly fell silent, ready to listen and make snap judgements. “Okay… the first thing you need to understand is that Rainbow Dash has never had a special somepony before. She doesn’t really care what normal ponies think constitute ‘going out.’”
“We don’t care about that, man,” somepony in the crowd said. “We just wanna know if you two have gone all the way!” There was a murmer of agreement.
“Well… there’s a lot of cuddling and making out, but no. We haven’t ‘gone all the way.’”
“Why not?” Luna shouted all of a sudden. “Is it because there is a child in the house?” Even if Luna was kind of kooky for a Princess, it was weird for everypony to hear her talking about this.
“I don’t really know why not. We just don’t, alright?”
“Have you even tried?” somepony asked.
“Yeah, I tried once…”
There they were again, laying close on the couch and necking like a couple of teenagers without a responsible adult in the room. Rainbow Dash’s neglected book lay open on the floor where she dropped it once she’d finally given into Thunderhead’s advances. Even on nights she claimed to just want to snuggle a bit, it was easy to tempt her into more once Taboo was off to bed. Most nights he didn’t even have to.
Thunderhead had already told himself that tonight was the big night. Now was the time to take things to the next level. It had been a little over a month since their relationship technically began. He originally thought Rainbow Dash would initiate it on her own, but he decided on his own that showing that he was ready could help her along.
From where he lay on top of her, he was in the perfect position to get things moving. He started slow, caressing her side with his forehoof. He met no resistance as he moved down towards her flank, even getting her to giggle a bit as he traced its edges. He gently moved up the outside of her leg, caressing it lovingly without going anywhere too sensitive. She jerked a little when he touched her hooves, a place he had learned she was tentative about having other ponies touch; however, she relaxed into it, giving him the go ahead to move forward.
He stealthily moved his hoof to the other side of her hoof, to the inside. Carefully and cautiously, he made the long journey back down towards his final goal. He went as easy and steady as he could down to the first bend of her leg, all the while doing his best to keep the brunt of her focus upstairs. He was so close he thought he was practically there. A little further, and the couch would graduate from just being a make out spot.
He thought this up until the point Rainbow Dash practically threw him off of said couch. With his back on the floor and his legs in the air, he could clearly see Rainbow Dash’s cross expression staring down at him.
“Out.”
“Huh?”
“Outside, now,” she said, pointing towards the door.
“But, I-”
“I said now!” Rainbow Dash raised her voice to a harsh whisper, still conscious of the other pony sleeping upstairs. When Thunderhead didn’t move fast enough, she got up and started pushing him towards the door. She ignored all his apologies and attempts to explain himself, shoving him out into the dark on his lonesome and locking the door behind him.
“You only tried one time?” Sprout asked.
“She made her position on the matter pretty clear,” Thunderhead replied. “I’m not an idiot. Besides, I’m not going to force her into it. If she wants to wait, that’s fine. I don’t plan on going anywhere in the foreseeable future.”
“Sounds like you’re serious about this,” Luna said, a smile of a more innocent nature appearing on her face.
“I don’t think I’ve ever been this serious about a mare before,” Thunderhead said, blushing profusely. Even if he was in the midst of it, talking about his relationship was embarrassing. “It’s not just about me and her, it’s about Taboo as well. I don’t want anything else but to spend the rest of my life with them as close as possible. It’s come to the point where I can’t even imagine anything else. I love them.”
“Well, you’ve far surpassed my expectations, Sergeant Thunderhead,” Luna said, releasing the rope trap. The guard fell to the ground, catching himself in midair with his wings before crashing face first into the floor. He set himself down carefully and bowed before his Princess. “Since you’ve made such a considerable stride forward, I am promoting you to Master Sergeant.”
“Really? I mean, I feel like I don’t deserve it,” Thunderhead said, being completely honest. His job had become loads easier in the past two months and all he did was play with Taboo, get physical with Rainbow Dash, and then keep watch after both girls were in bed.
“Do not belittle the value of this gift. You have much heart and compassion, Thunderhead,” Princess Luna said. “These are things superior officers need, so keep up the good work. Perhaps one day this assignment will come to an end, and then you can pursue something you believe is worthy getting promoted over.”
“Promotions are the last things on my mind, your highness.”
“Such a good solider.” Luna let out a long yawn. “Forgive me, but it seems time for us night-dwellers to turn in for the day. Off to bed everypony.” There were a few grumbles from some of the other guards, like a bunch of foals who wanted to stay up late. Their mother scolded and urged them into bed, but Thunderhead needed no further pushing. He gladly retreated to his bunk and got comfortable. Despite how easy his job felt, it always left him exhausted.
Rainbow Dash put down her hammer and wiped the sweat off her brow. This Spring was a temperate one, the kind a pony feels compelled to do some work outside. She never fancied herself a carpenter, but today she was helping to add another room onto Fluttershy’s house. After getting married, Time Turner had moved out of his store’s attic and into her place since it was an actual house. There was room enough for them and the rest of the critters around, but the times were changing. The need for a new room on the house had arisen, so Fluttershy’s friends heeded the call to help.
Everything was changing. Not just the form of Fluttershy’s house, but the form of her family as well. Not just Fluttershy’s either, as Rainbow Dash could see everypony in her circle of friends slowly shifting towards a new phase in their lives. She sensed that what had started when she adopted Taboo was starting to pick up momentum. The times where just the six of them could gather together whenever it suited them was coming to a close. Times like these were becoming fewer and farther between, but in turn the time was much more gratifying and meaningful. The give evened out the take, in a sense.
“A little more to the left.”
Rainbow Dash sat down and took a quick rest, picking up her canteen and taking a deep pull. She hadn’t done some good old fashioned manual labor in a while. Practicing flying was one thing, but a body gets used to the same routine day in and day out. A pony needs to throw their system for a loop occasionally. She sat there, examining her own handiwork while Rarity critiqued Pierce’s.
“It needs to be higher.”
Pierce wasn’t much of a carpenter either.
“No, that’s too high.”
Neither was Rarity.
“Do you want to do it yourself?” Pierce asked, getting frustrated over where to nail down his board.
“I’m more of an interior designer than an exterior designer,” Rarity said, smiling at him from her spot in the shade. “Perhaps Applejack will know better.”
Applejack was actually something of a carpenter.
“If y’all ask me, we should take a cue of Dash ‘ere and take a little break,” the farmpony said, putting down her own tools. The rest of the group agreed quickly, stopping their current duties and moving over to the shade. The sun stood at high noon over the ponies who had been working since it came up, and considering their collective experience in the area of construction they had made impressive progress.
“Do you think we’ll finish today?” Twilight asked, resting beside Spike. The dragon looked absolutely swamped, having done most of the heavy lifting while Twilight made sure everything was just so. Between her, Rarity, and Time Turner there were plenty of picky ponies to go around today.
“I reckon we could,” Applejack replied. “For just a couple of mares and two stallions, I’m honestly impressed with how well everythin’ is going. I almost don’t wanna go and jinx it.”
“We’re pretty much doomed to be jinxed,” Spike pointed out. Something had to go awry, even if just slightly. That’s just how the universe works. “But I’m not stopping until it’s done. I’ll go all day if I have to.”
“Oh, you don’t have to go that far,” Fluttershy said. She hadn’t even really wanted her friends to do the larger part of the labor, but she couldn’t stop their collective desire to help. “I’m sure me and Timey could handle it on our own.”
“Nonsense Fluttershy.” Rarity stopped her friend before she could say anything too ridiculous. “Turner is just one pony and you are one pregnant pony. You must keep your hooves on the ground and your body at rest. Just leave this to us!” Pierce’s eyes rolled at the world “us,” but other than that everypony was in agreement.
“I-I’m not that pregnant yet…”
“Please just take it easy, sweetheart,” Time Turner told his wife for the thousandth time. Any other mare would have quickly used their pregnancy as an out to hard work, but Fluttershy didn’t want to put her friends out if she didn’t have to. Time Turner’s job was to get her to believe she had to. “Besides, the sentiment behind the nursery will be so much more if your friends all work together to help build it.”
“Well, I suppose…”
“Supposin’ is good enough,” Applejack said before she could get any further. “We ain’t electricians, carpenters, or plumbers, but we are your friends. Just let us do what we can for you.”
“Here, here,” Rarity said. “We know you’d insist on doing the same for us. It’s only fair we do the same for you.”
“Oh, but I haven’t done anything yet!” Fluttershy argued. It was difficult to sway her on this issue.
Meanwhile, Rainbow Dash was clearly spaced out. Twilight was the first to notice the familiar, far away expression on her friend’s face. She looked like that a lot nowadays, but Twilight could understand. She often felt contemplative these days as well.
“You holding up there, Rainbow Dash?” she asked, checking in with her. Rainbow Dash’s awareness flitted back down from where it was and settled slowly in the present. She smiled and nodded, a poor indication of holding up well. “Got a lot on your mind?”
“Yeah, I guess so.” She could admit this easily. Her concerns were her friends’ concerns after all. “There’s just a lot going on.”
“But isn’t it exciting?” Rarity asked, jumping into the conversation. “A nursery for Fluttershy, a birthday party for Taboo, and then I’m getting married! Don’t look so glum! These are all good things!”
“I know that,” Rainbow Dash said, struggling to put to words why she felt the way she did. “It’s just busy, you know?”
“I suppose, but it’s worth it isn’t it?” Rarity leaned into Pierce, who was still uncomfortable with public displays of affection. He blushed and put a hoof around her, doing the best he could. “At least the summer looks to be relaxing.”
“I’ll say!” Pinkie Pie said, suddenly appearing in the group.
“Pinkie.”
“Yes?” The earth pony spun around and faced Rainbow Dash.
“You left your post again.”
“Oh… Oh!” Pinkie Pie quickly jumped into action and started bouncing back where she came from. Rainbow Dash heaved a sigh and planted her face in the ground.
“I still have trouble believing the Cakes trust her to foalsit.”
“It’s Pinkie Pie,” Applejack said. “Stranger things have happened to that mare.”
“I need to find somepony more reliable to foalsit,” Rainbow Dash said, in a hushed tone just in case Pinkie Pie was still around. “I mean, I’m find with her keeping an eye on Taboo while the twins are around, but I need to find somepony that I can trust with Taboo alone.”
“Well, you’ve got time to find somepony,” Twilight reminded her. “Your commitments aren’t taking you away from her quite yet.”
“Well, they will one day.” Rainbow Dash knew this all too well. Being a Wonderbolt and a parent meant being away, and being away for most of the day.
“Well, I have a solution.” All eyes turned to Rarity. “Just find yourself a nice coltfriend to look after her during the day.” Everypony started laughing at the joke, but Rainbow Dash’s laugh was somewhat halfhearted.
“Yeah… imagine me in love with somepony.” Her heart fluttered a little, but she didn’t dare show it.
With Pinkie Pie gone, Taboo and the twins could catch their breath for a moment. The mare was fun to be around, but also notably tiring to be around. She played hard, real hard. Anytime mommy had Pinkie watch over her, Taboo had to ask the same question.
“Is she always like that?”
“Always!” Pumpkin answered, used to the hustle at the spry young age of two. Her brother wasn’t so gung-ho about it, but she didn’t seem to care or notice. “You should try living with her.”
“I like where I live,” Taboo replied, not ready to give up the comforts of her true home. “I’ve got mommy and daddy and Tank to play with.”
“I’ve never seen your daddy,” Pound said, getting up from where he had been sitting on the ground. “Where is he?”
“He only comes out at night. Mommy says it’s because he sleeps all day.” Taboo had never been told why this was the case, but daddy always said it was just part of his job. Having a job was a strange affair to such a young pony.
“That doesn’t make any sense,” Pumpkin said. Taboo thought so too, but her parents didn’t like to talk about it much. “If he didn’t sleep all day, he could come out during the day!”
“Maybe he doesn’t have to sleep. Pinkie Pie drinks coffee to stay up all night sometimes.” Pound’s idea sounded pretty solid, but Taboo didn’t even know where to get coffee. She would have to ask mommy about it later. “How are we going to meet him if he only comes out at night?”
“He promised he would come to my birthday party, even though it’s during the day.” Taboo smiled at her friends, her wings flapping excitedly behind her. “You’re both coming, right?”
“There’s no way we’d miss it!” Pumpkin shouted, galloping into Taboo and hugging her hard. “After you missed our birthday party, we can’t miss yours! We just can’t!”
“I’m sorry I missed it, but nopony told me it was happening!”
“Mom said the invitation got lost in the mail,” Pound told her. “I thought we could go to your house and tell you, but you live in the sky. My wings aren’t strong enough to fly me up there.”
“Don’t worry, I won’t miss it ever again!” Taboo was confident she’d done what was necessary to stay in the loop for the next time around. “I had mommy put it on the calendar so I know when it’s coming next year.”
“That’s a good idea,” Pumpkin said, squeezing Taboo a little tighter. The hug was already pretty secure, so Taboo thought her eyes were going to pop out of their sockets for a second. “There’ll be plenty of cake!”
“Cake is good,” Taboo strained to say. Pumpkin finally released her, allowing her to collapse on the ground and fill her lungs with air again. Sometimes friendship was dangerous. “We’re having it at my party too.”
“Good, because I love cake!” Pumpkin threw her hooves into the sky and shouted her love for all to hear. “Other ponies say I’ll just get tired of it because I’m around it all the time, but I doubt that will ever happen!”
“Mommy says I can’t have cake too often or I’ll get fat,” Taboo said. “But Grandma says I should eat as much as I can before I won’t be able to. I don’t know what that means, but she always lets me have cookies when I ask!”
“Eating lots of cake gives me a tummy ache.” Pound got an odd look from the two fillies. “What? I do. You know that Pumpkin.”
“You’re just bad at eating cake.” Pumpkin put her nose in the air and averted her eyes. “You’re no fun to eat cake with. I want to eat cake with Taboo.”
“You don’t have to be mean about it.” Pound furrowed his brow and looked around. “When is Pinkie coming back?”
“Pinkie was coming back!” Pinkie Pie shouted, appearing behind him before anypony could get a handle on what was going on. “But Pinkie Pie is back now. Sorry I left, but I just got distracted.”
“By what?” Pound asked, even though he should have known better by this point.
“My friends were out in front of the cottage talking, duh!” Pinkie Pie replied, pointing her hoof in the general direction she’d just been in. There was a considerable distance between her and the cottage in the first place, so it was unknown to anypony how she heard what was going on or how it could distract her. These were questions the younger ponies didn’t need to fret over. “Ready for some more fun?”
“Yeah, I’m ready for fun,” Pound answered, looking over at his sister. “I’m all about fun.”
“No you’re not!” Pumpkin glared at her sibling. “You’re the most boring of all of us.”
“Am not!”
“Are too!”
“Am not!”
“Aww c’mon you two, it was a trick question anyway,” Pinkie Pie said, but the two twins continued without hearing her. She didn’t hear them not hear her either. “I knew you were ready for fun. I mean, who isn’t ready for fun? Maybe you’re not expecting fun, but if fun comes your way you’re ready for it. Who doesn’t want to have fun? I can’t even begin to think about…”
“Well, looks like you’re all having fun.” Rainbow Dash alighted on the ground next to Taboo, who was watching the three other ponies try to talk over one another. Taboo gave her a hug and got hugged in kind. “Everything going fine back here?”
“Yeah, they’ll stop soon,” Taboo said, getting used to these kinds of shenanigans. “How is the building going?”
“We think we’re going to finish today,” Rainbow Dash told her.
“Good, because Fluttershy’s foal needs someplace to sleep.” Taboo nodded sagely, even if her knowledge was lacking. “When is the foal coming?”
“It won’t be for a little while.” Rainbow Dash smiled. She was glad her kid could get excited about these kinds of things. As a kid herself, Rainbow Dash remembered not caring much about marriages and pregnancies. She was only getting excited about them now as an adult.
“Where is she going to get her foal?” Taboo asked, causing Rainbow Dash to freeze up. “Is it the same place Miss Roseluck is going to get hers?”
“Ah… well…”
“And since Mister Turner doesn’t have wings, are they going to get a foal without wings too?”
“I… I can’t rea-”
“Are they getting a filly or a colt?”
“H-hey, not to change the subject or anything,” Rainbow Dash said, even if it was a blatant lie. “How would you feel about going to grandma’s and grandpa’s this weekend?”
“Aren’t they coming here next week?” Taboo asked, tilting her head to the side and forgetting all about her previous queries.
“Yes, but it’s nice to visit them at their own house sometimes. They would like that a lot I think.” They would probably be more than happy to have Rainbow Dash and Taboo for the weekend. Her father in particular had been asking quite frequently when she was going to come again recently. Now seemed like an opportune time for a quick visit. Now was a good time to get away from Ponyville for a little while.
“Is daddy going to come with us too?”
“… You bet.” In fact, he was the motivation for going in the first place.
“I’m serious. We need to talk,” Rainbow Dash said as seriously as she could, even with Thunderhead nipping at her neck. It would have been easy to just forget everything and suck face for the night, but this was an issue that needed to be approached. “Knock it off…”
Thunderhead complied immediately, sensing the venom in her voice. Even if she was forcing herself to not mess around, he knew better than to go against her wishes in this area. If they needed to have a serious talk, then it was time for a serious talk. It seemed strange that she waited for Taboo to go to sleep before bringing it up, but Thunderhead realized the subject might be even more so serious.
“Something up?”
“… We’re going to my parents this weekend.”
“Oh? … Oh.” Thunderhead realized what this was about. “Planning on introducing your coltfriend to them?”
“That’s the plan.” Rainbow Dash didn’t sound all that confident for some reason, which didn’t sit well with Thunderhead at all.
“You’re worried about that? Your mom seemed to like me when we first met and your dad sounds like a chill guy,” Thunderhead said, trying to comfort her. He didn’t have much to go off, considering he knew far less about the ponies in question than Rainbow Dash did; however, they weren’t the ponies she was worried about.
“I know they’ll probably like you… but there’s something else I need to tell you… about us,” Rainbow Dash said. She was avoiding eye contact with Thunderhead, which was just another factor in how worried he was getting. He got the feeling she wasn’t about to break up with him or anything, but the fact that he had no idea what was on her mind was unsettling. “The truth is… I haven’t told anypony that we’re seeing each other.”
“… Anypony as in-”
“Everypony.”
Thunderhead blinked a few times, still thinking about what he’d been presented with. He wasn’t sure what to think or feel at the moment, mostly because the shape of their relationship was already so nebulous. Rainbow Dash could see the confusion clearly on his face, so she went on to try and explain herself, but even she wasn’t sure how to come to terms with this.
“I didn’t tell anypony right away because I was worried I just got carried away with my emotions that night,” Rainbow Dash told him, her reasoning sound so far. “But then we talked it over and put everything out on the table, and that was when I thought I should tell my friends what was going on.”
“But you didn’t?”
“Before I could tell them, Rarity reveals to everypony that she’s getting married,” Rainbow Dash said. “I didn’t want to steal the spotlight from Rarity, so I just decided to stay quiet about it for the time being. I decide to wait until Fluttershy gets back from her Honeymoon to fess up, but even after she’s back we didn’t all get together for a while. I guess I could have told them on an individual basis, but I wanted to make one announcement and get it over with. Then Fluttershy calls us all together, and so I’m thinking this is my chance, right? That’s when she announces she’s pregnant. Once again, I feel like I shouldn’t overshadow her announcement.”
“It’s been a little while since then, right?” Thunderhead asked, still not fully comprehending. “Why haven’t you told them yet?”
“Well, it’s been going on for so long now that I don’t want to reveal that I haven’t been totally honest with them.” Rainbow Dash slumped down and put her chin on the couch. It had been eating at her for a while, but it felt good to actually tell somepony about it. She figured it would feel even better to tell her friends that she and Thunderhead were an item, but the guilt still hung. “It’s silly, but I just can’t get around it.”
“They’re going to have to know eventually,” Thunderhead said, leaning down to her level. “The longer you hide it, the worse that feeling is going to get. You can’t keep this a secret.”
“Yeah, I know.” She really did know, but this was new territory for her. It wasn’t just embarrassing for her to talk about, but it was even a little scary. Rainbow Dash didn’t know how to deal with matters of the heart like this. “But, you’re not mad about it, are you?”
“… No, I guess not.” Thunderhead didn’t exactly sound happy about it. He had been concerned that she was having second thoughts about them, but he figured she wouldn’t have lead into this conversation with an offer to meet her parents if she was planning on breaking up with him. That thought scared him out of his wits, scared him more than he cared for. “When the time comes, I’ll help you explain everything.”
“If you’re around.”
“Yeah, if I’m around,” Thunderhead said, giving her a little nuzzle. Rainbow Dash giggled and returned it in kind. “I’m not around near enough. I wish I could be around all day”
“I’m not even sure what I’d do with you all day.”
“You don’t?” Thunderhead gave her a kiss. The pair chuckled and exchanged a few more. “I have a few ideas.”
“Of course you do,” Rainbow Dash said with her nose pressed against his. “You’re such a guy.”
“But I’m your guy.” Thunderhead leaned in, initiating a deep kiss and guiding Rainbow Dash to a more submissive position beneath him. She always squirmed a bit under his power, but only because she was used to being in control. It was a little game they played: he would have to do his best to get her to honestly admit she was enjoying herself. If he couldn’t do it, she would eventually end up on top of him and fall asleep that way. His reward was getting to slowly watch her nod off in his embrace and then tuck her into bed. Either way, he got a pretty good deal.
“I do want everypony to know,” Rainbow Dash said, backing out of the kiss. Thunderhead went in and brought her back, but she giggled and escaped once more. “But I’d rather keep you a secret forever than have to give you up.”
Thunderhead replied by diving back in and silencing her. He pressed her body against his own and ran a hoof through her mane, as if to say he understood her sentiment; however, Thunderhead didn’t want to be a little secret. He already knew what he wanted, and that was everything.
The house of Taboo’s grandparents was full of all sorts of interesting stuff. Left to her own devices, there were plenty of nooks and crannies to poke around. Mommy had shooed her out of the kitchen until it was dinnertime, so Taboo decided she would do a little more snooping around than she had done last time.
She had already seen grandma’s studio where she keeps all her paintings. Some of them didn’t look finished or like something Taboo could identify. It was a dark room too, so Taboo didn’t like hanging around there.
Grandpa’s office was pretty boring too. There was just paper scattered all over the place with funny writing on them. Taboo couldn’t read, so the written word didn’t do much for her. The only interesting thing in the room was grandpa’s chair which spun and rolled around. Mommy had yelled at her for playing in it, so she would have to wait until grandpa came home to ask him to play with it again.
Taboo had also gone through her mommy’s old room from when she had lived in this house. It reminded Taboo of home, but that was probably because both places were decked out in Wonderbolt memorabilia. None of that was interesting to Taboo, so she had given up on that room. She did find an old looking and thick book bound with a strap behind the dresser, but again her inability to read made this discovery a dead end. It had a pretty picture of mommy’s cutie mark on the front though, so there was that.
After these rooms turned up nothing fun, Taboo realized she hadn’t even bothered to explore the room she had spent the most time in: the den. There were cabinets and bookshelves and things to look at in that room. The moment she set to looking around, she struck gold.
There were a bunch of big books filled with pictures of two ponies she didn’t exactly recognize. One of them was a rainbow maned mare who sort of resembled mommy and the other was a stallion with thick glasses and a stubbly moustache. Taboo wasn’t sure if this was some kind of picture book about this ponies or what, but the pictures told quite the story.
In the first part of the book, the two ponies are exploring a city entirely in the clouds. They are always side by side, whether they’re posing with the Wonderbolts or standing in the middle of a cloud arena. They smile little grins in each of the photos, clearly making a happy memory each time.
The pictures take a sudden turn as the two ponies are suddenly wearing pit helmets and wandering through a dense forest. Each picture taken is usually of the spectacled pony running from some ferocious beast, the mare posing with a tiny little animal, or some combination of both. There are other pictures of breathtaking vistas against mighty waterfalls and enormous trees. Taboo never knew places like these existed, but she does know she wants to see them herself one day.
The book went on and on with pictures, with each location more exotic than the next. The ponies travel into a desert, to the top of a mountain, out across the sea, into the depths of the ocean, and even the innards of a dismal cave. They toured big cities and worked on busy farms, always with those same smiles. Taboo can understand this easily. It is fun to travel around and see new places and have new experiences. She turns the page again, wondering what kind of adventure the two ponies will go on.
The next page is blank. The page after it is also blank. Taboo keeps turning and turning, but the rest of the book is completely empty. She didn’t understand why that would happen. Did the ponies stop going on adventures? Why would they do that if they were having so much fun?
She set the book aside and picked up the next book, opening it up to its center.
“Oh, why can’t you tell me now?”
“If I told you why I can’t tell you, that would give the whole thing away,” Rainbow Dash said, keeping her gaze fixed on the pot of water. It wasn’t boiling, much to her chagrin.
“But I feel like I already know what it is,” Palette said, pacing around the kitchen and making Rainbow Dash far more nervous than she generally liked to be. Her mother couldn’t help it; she really did have it pretty much figured out already.
“I’m counting on you figuring it out on your own,” Rainbow Dash admitted. She was still too embarrassed to say it out loud to anypony beyond Thunderhead, but this was a baby step in the right direction. “Just promise me you won’t make a huge scene.”
“Now Dashie, you know I don’t make promises I don’t intend to keep.”
“Grandma?”
Just then, a little head popped up over and dropped a book on the counter. Palette recognized the book instantly, smiling as she trotted over to Taboo. Rainbow Dash kept her vigil on the pot, but kept her ears trained on her family.
“Is this mommy?”
“It is mommy,” Palette said, looking down at the glossy photos of the album. “This is her when she was your age.”
“She was small.”
“The other fillies and colts teased her for being short,” Palette told her granddaughter, which prompted Rainbow Dash to take a more active interest in the conversation. “But what she lacked in height she made up for in enthusiasm. Me and grandpa had a hard time keeping her from flying circles all around the house.”
“She could fly?” Taboo asked, glancing back at her wings. She gave them a few clumsy flaps, but she didn’t even feel remotely like she was going to lift off.
“Your mom was a natural.” Palette heaved a sigh, remembering how having her precious little foal zipping around the house at breakneck speed was not the ideal situation for a young mother. Flipping through the album and looking at the pictures of her little filly, she marveled at how Rainbow Dash managed to live past six years old. She turned the page to a particularly harrowing memory. “This is your mommy going off to Summer Flight Camp for the first, and last time.”
“I guess it is my fault for being too awesome,” Rainbow Dash said, smiling at that particular memory. The way she remembered it, there was no looming terror of possibly losing an only child in a multicolored explosion.
“Is that Fluttershy?” Taboo asked, pointing the lanky pegasi cowering behind Rainbow Dash in one of the pictures.
“Mmhmm. She went to flight camp with mommy,” Palette said.
“Was she a natural too?”
“Ah… well, not at flying.” Palette turned the page, hoping to revisit some less frightening memories. It had been a while since she looked through this album, and she wondered what had taken her so long considering all the things that were going on.
Memory after memory came flooding back, good times and bad. Taboo listened to each story in turn, completely entranced by every detail. It hadn’t occurred to her that her mommy had once been a filly too, and Palette had nearly forgotten herself. As she passed the time with her granddaughter, she was reminded that her only child wasn’t a child anymore.
*Knock knock*
“Uh, I’ll get it!”
Palette looked up from the album for the first time in a while to see Rainbow Dash galloping to the door. Her heart jumped a little. She followed her daughter, but she moved slowly. Palette wondered where all that excitement went, and where this anxiety was coming from. When she reached the bottom of the stairs, Birdie emerged as well. He watched his spouse walk by him and then stop a little ways from the door. He stood next to her, noting how still she was. She wrapped a foreleg around his as they watched Rainbow Dash prep herself to open up the door.
Birdie knew this side of his wife. She was probably nervous, panicking, and thinking that she wasn’t letting it show. Maybe she could fool a stranger, but after so many years of being in love with this mare he knew her moods better than he knew his own.
Rainbow Dash was a child who could leave the house for half-an-hour and come back with a million scrapes and cuts. This was the child who picked a fight with every colt that looked at her funny. This was the child that broke the sound barrier just to win a race. Nopony could make Palette worry more than Rainbow Dash could. It stood to reason that Palette did all the worrying that Rainbow Dash didn’t. Palette was a mother who was too aware of her foal’s ability to hurt herself. She hated to see her foal hurt; it hurt her.
This wasn’t Rainbow Dash’s newest stunt. This wasn’t another sendoff to a race. This wasn’t flight camp. No, this was a different kind of danger. Palette had put her daughter’s body back together a thousand times, but this time Rainbow Dash’s heart might be on the line. Palette didn’t know if she could fix that if it broke. She held on fast to her own husband, as if her own heart was about to break.
“You’re worrying too much,” Birdie said loud enough for both mares to hear. “Just open the darn door and let the poor stallion in.” He squeezed his spouse back. This was his way of telling her not to worry so much.
“Right,” Rainbow Dash said, oblivious to what her parents were doing. She took a deep breath and then whipped the door open as if she was ripping off a bandage. The stallion stepped in, taking his spot next to Rainbow Dash. “Uh… mom, dad… you remember Thunderhead?”
*Knock knock *
There was the lightest of rapping on Rainbow Dash’s childhood windowpane. Had she been asleep, there was no way she would’ve heard it and jumped right out of bed. She had been both expecting and hoping for this visit tonight. She walked on the tips of her hooves over to the window and opened it up, the dull hum of the night invading as soon as the pane was lifted. She hoisted the stubborn window up as far as it would go and popped her head out, smiling at the pony flapping his wings outside.
“Hey.”
“Hey there.”
Quiet. They just hung there like paintings on a wall, admiring each other. The situation was different from what they were used to.
“So… how’d I do?” Thunderhead asked.
“Mmm… you passed,” Rainbow Dash said, smirking as she ducked back inside her room. Thunderhead swooped down in pursuit, sticking his head through the window. She continued strutting away from him, but the size of the window wasn’t going to let him follow her inside.
“’I passed?’ Does that mean they like me?” Thunderhead knew from experience that you couldn’t trust the parents of your marefriend on the first meeting. Until he could gain their trust, it would be assumed he had a secret agenda simply be default. Even if he kinda-sorta had an agenda, it wasn’t devious or anything.
“They approve of you,” Rainbow Dash told him, turning back to where he was stuck in the window. She approached him, but stayed just out of reach.
“It’s nice they approve of me, but I want to know if they like me.”
“Just be happy you have their approval.”
“As nice as their approval is, I don’t really need it to go out with you,” he replied.
“If you don’t need their approval, why do you need them to like you?” Rainbow Dash said, scooting a little closer to him. She leaned in a little, but still stayed a few mere inches from his face.
“I would like for them to like me.” Stretch as he might, he couldn’t close the gap to get to Rainbow Dash. “What did they say about me after dinner?”
“Probably nothing that would surprise you,” Rainbow Dash said, feigning a yawn. The look on Thunderhead’s fac implored her to go on. “They said you seem like a nice stallion. They liked how you got along with Taboo, but my dad thought you got along with her a little too well.”
“Too well?”
“Don’t worry about it,” she told him, but that is, of course, the last thing you say to a pony if you don’t want them to worry about something. “They like your choice of occupation and employer, but they’re still wary of a stallion who sleeps all day and works all night. They talked for a while about how you should try and transition over to the daytime, so we could have a more normal relationship.”
“Normal is overrated.”
“I told them that.” Rainbow Dash batted her eyes at him and finally moved close enough for the two to at long last share a kiss. “And my dad said he could tell we were rather taken with each other. He ordered me not to get too physical with you, but I put him at ease.”
“Sounds like a father to me.” He kissed her again, trying to urge her to come closer.
“And my mother thinks you’re cute.” She moved close enough to nuzzle against his neck.
“Oh, she said that?” He nuzzled her back, planting a few kisses on her neck. “Do you think I’m cute?” He kept up his affections, getting her to giggle despite her trying her hardest to restrain. She fought back, but Thunderhead had the advantage.
“Ack-he-he, stop that!” she whispered. “We’re gonna get caught.”
“Not until you say it.”
“Grow *snicker* up, you goof.” Rainbow Dash could easily end this by moving away, but something about secretly having a stallion in her room while her parents were just down the hall was much to thrilling to pass up. She never got to have this kind of experience before. “Alright, yes, yes!”
“Say it.”
“No, he-he! Ack!” Rainbow Dash wasn’t accustomed to this feeling of wanting to lose.
“Saaay it.”
“Fine! You’re cute!”
“How cute?”
“Aah-he-he, seriously?” She was having too much fun to think seriously about the question, but it didn’t merit a serious answer anyway. “Not as cute as Taboo.”
“Ha, fair enough,” he said, just glad she was taking the teasing so well. He backed off, but touched his nose to hers so he could just stare into her eyes.
“Do you think I’m cute?” Rainbow Dash dared to ask, not above getting a little revenge.
“Beautiful, actually.” Thunderhead responded without missing a beat, not about to let the tables be turned on him. Rainbow Dash, on the other hoof, immediately flushed red and broke eye contact. He thought it was funny how a mare who basically thrived on having ponies feed her ego could get so flustered like this. “And you’re adorable when you’re embarrassed.”
“I’m not embarrassed,” she said, smiling as she looked back up at him. Even if she was clearly embarrassed, there was no way she was ever going to admit it. She didn’t even understand why she felt that way about the compliment. It made her happy to hear that from him, from Thunderhead. Then again, she couldn’t clearly put to words why that was either.
They stayed there, one sitting, one flying, both touching at the nose. Rainbow Dash wondered how long she would get embarrassed like this. She wondered how many more times she would sit across the table from her parents with him, covertly scooting their chairs closer to one another. She wondered how many nights they would spend together with Taboo, just talking and laughing until she fell asleep on the couch.
It occurred to Rainbow Dash that her picture of the future had changed once again. Once, she had imagined a life where her only company was her friends and her adoring fans, but now that vision felt lonely. Now when she envisioned the days and nights to come, there were two ponies sharing a roof with her. She didn’t want to lose that, not any part of that. A trace of fear found its way into her mind, and she needed to confirm something.
“Hey.”
“Yeah?” Thunderhead waited for her to speak up again. It took a moment, but once it was said there was no mistaking she had.
“I love you.”
“… I love you, too.”
Now they were both blushing, and both wondering if that could’ve been anymore cliché. Thunderhead had hoped to say something a bit more eloquent, but nothing came to mind. At least he got the sentiment across.
“… Ah, jeez, that’s enough for one night,” Rainbow Dash said, literally backing out of the conversation. Even so, her heart was pounding and she was smiling like an idiot. Thunderhead was grinning too and avoiding eye contact. It would’ve been evident to anypony who knew the pair that they were really, truly, stupidly in love. “I… guuuuess I’ll see you tomorrow?”
“Of course! Yeah, uh, tomorrow,” Thunderhead said, also wanting a little space to privately celebrate for the night. “I’ll always come back.” He added that last part without thinking that much, renewing his own awkward feeling at how lame he was managing to be; however, Rainbow Dash smiled. Little did he know, but that is exactly what he wanted to hear.
“Good night,” she said, backing up towards her bed. “I love you.”
“I love you.”
They could say it a bit too easily now, but neither one cared. Rainbow Dash was so excited she could hardly sleep and Thunderhead was so happy he abandoned his patrol pattern to just fly wide circles around the house. As far as nights went, this was a good one.
