The hardest thing is letting go.

by Aprion

Rating: teen
Tags: Granny Smith, Sad, Applejack, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Slice of Life, Death
Length: 1079

It's never easy to let go of a loved one when the time comes.

It's never easy to let go of a loved one when the time comes.

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I wrote this on a whim, as a way to vent some of my own grief, and cried a lot while doing so. This ain't no masterpiece, just an attempt to turn raw emotion into coherent words.

Sadness inside, you have been warned.

Published 2019-10-05 23:30:02 UTC
Last updated 2019-10-05 23:30:02 UTC

let her go.

For months now, Granny smith’s health had been slowly declining. The once spry old mare spent most of her time these days indoors. Her old bones paining her too much for her to go about her usual routine. First she spent the majority of her time in her good old rocking chair. But after a while that too became too much for her, and she spent more and more of her days in bed.

Then, one autumn evening she slept right through dinner. The next morning she was still sleeping way past breakfast. When she didn’t wake for lunch, Sugar Belle insisted they call doctor horse.

“She doesn’t need no doctor, Granny is just fine.” Applejack had said stubbornly. “She’s just tired is all.”

But Big Macintosh put his hoof down, and that evening doctor Horse made a housecall.

“How is she, doctor?” Sugar Belle asked when the doctor descended the stairs.

The doctor shook his head. “She’s an old pony. Doctors can do many things, but unfortunately we can’t cure old age.”

“How long?” Asked Big Mac with a lump in his throat.

“A few days at most.” Said doctor Horse.

“Hogwash!” Applejack spat. “She’s fine. She just needs some rest.”

Before anyone could say anything, she stormed off.

That evening she brought granny some soup. The old mare could barely stay awake long enough to eat it. AJ had to help her because she was unable to hold the spoon.

The next morning she brought her a late breakfast.

“Wake up granny, it's time for breakfast.” AJ said whilst opening the curtains. The sky outside was cloudy and gray, it had been that way all week.

She put the plate with a bowl of hot porridge down on the nightstand. “Granny, come on, it's time to wake up. Ya gotta eat something.” She said as she nudged the old pony.

Granny Smith grimaced slightly, but didn’t wake up. She just lay there, breathing heavily.

“Come on Granny, you can’t get better unless you eat.” Said Applejack, but Granny didn’t stir.

“Fine then, Imma sit here and let you have a few more minutes. But then you gotta get up.”

As she turned around, she suddenly spotted a figure standing at the foot of the bed. A hooded pony with Batlike wings. Except the wings were bony and the membrane in between them was torn and tattered like old rags.

“Who are you? How did you get in here?” Applejack demanded.

“You know who I am.” Said the figure in a kind, fatherly voice.

Applejack shook her head. “N-no, I have no idea.”

The figure tilted its head as if amused. “Yes you do. Be honest now.”

She swallowed hard. “You’re The Black Stallion. Death.”

“My friends call me Styx.”

“W-why are you here.” Applejack asked, dreading the answer.

“I’m here to talk to you.” said Styx.

“Me?” AJ gaped.

“It's time for you to let her go, Applejack.”

“What? N-no, no! It's too soon. There’s too much she needs to see.”

“Applejack…” Styx said kindly, but she ignored him.

“Big Mac and Sugar Belle just had their first foal. Granny needs to be there, to see him grow.”

“She will see him grow. She will always be watching. You just won't be able to see her.”

“And the farm, there’s still too much to do. We can’t do it without her wisdom.”

“You know everything you need to know. Granny saw to that.”

“I…. I…”

“It’s time to let her go, Applejack.”

“But she’s just sleeping. She’s fine!”

“She’s a strong, kind and above all a stubborn mare. She’s hanging in there purely for your sake. Even though her bones ache, her eyes trouble her, and her spirit all but screams for rest; she stubbornly clings to life just for you. It’s time to let her get the rest she so rightfully deserves.”

“But what about us? How will we go on without her?” she asked, tears welling up in her eyes.

“You will be fine. You’ve grown up to be a strong, dependable mare. If she could speak she’d be the first to tell you you’re ready to run things on your own.”

“I’m not. I’m not ready to let her go. I don’t feel ready to say goodbye” AJ cried.

“Oh, Applejack. Nopony ever feels ready to say goodbye. And that’s understandable. You love her, she’s been your rock, your anchor, and the one person you’ve tried so hard to live up to. And you couldn’t make her more proud if you tried. But, there comes a point where you have to let her go. For her sake as much as your own.”

Applejack hung her head, eyes shut tightly while tears stained the fur of her cheeks. “It hurts. It hurts so much.”

“The pain will pass in time. Tears are just bits of sadness leaving the heart, to make room for new joys to eventually take their place. All you need is time.”

AJ looked to where Granny Smith lay sleeping. She slowly moved forward and nuzzled the old mare’s cheek one more time. She looked so frail, so tired. She took a deep, shuddering breath and leaned close to Granny’s ear.

“It's alright now, Granny. I’ll watch over Apple Bloom, Big Mac and his… our family. You’ve done your best…. A-and.. You can rest now. We’ll be alright, I promise.”

The grey skies outside parted, letting a few gentle rays of sunshine through. Granny’s face seemed to relax. Her breathing calmed, and then stopped.

Aj waited for her to draw her next breath, and waited, and waited some more.

“Granny?” She asked uncertainly, reaching out with a hoof to gently nudge the old mare. “Granny?”

“It's alright.” Said Styx.

AJ looked up, tears spilling freely. A gentle gust of air blew through the window, tickling her mane and face.

Styx smiled. “She’s just saying goodbye.”

“Granny.” AJ repeated, choking down a sob.

“You should go to your family.” Said Styx.

Applejack nodded numbly before slowly walking out of the room.

“She’ll be alright.” Said Styx.

“I know.” Said Granny Smith, standing to his left. “They will look out for each other. I just wish I could have hugged them one last time.”

“Someday you will again.” Styx smiled.

Granny Smith nodded. “But hopefully not for a long, long time.”

Then the two of them turned to the window. They walked into the sunlight, and slowly faded from sight.