My Life As A Royal Changeling

by Tangent

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Human, Changelings, Comedy, Self Insert
Length: 21182

A middle aged brony finds herself inexplicably replacing Chrysalis as the new queen of the hive a few decades before a certain pony prophesy comes to fruition. Now the new queen must decide what direction to take the kingdom she inherited..

A middle aged brony inexplicably replaces Chrysalis as a new changeling queen some decades before the fruition of a certain pony prophesy. Now the new queen must figure out how to manage a kingdom that has been in a slow, seemingly irreversible, decline for the past several thousand years.

Published 2019-10-12 19:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2022-07-19 09:18:27 UTC

Chapter 1

Queen Chrysalis was dead.

One moment she was there, as tall and imposing as ever, her unique mane waving in the wasteland winds as her equally unique eyes gazed out over her assembled forces. Not that she felt a particular need to do so, as her preferred tactic for whenever her hive went to war was the simple swarm rush. Throw enough changelings at a problem and said problem generally either went away or otherwise became a nonissue in short order. Sure, the cost in changeling lives could be a bit steep, but the little idiots were practically born to be disposable and interchangeable, with only a few ever achieving any real notoriety for skill, power, or cleverness.

The next moment, there was a blinding flash of blue-green lightning, accompanied by a deafening crash of thunder, and all that was left of the former changeling queen was a blackened scorch mark on the desert floor and a puddle of sizzling green goo mixed with bits of black carapace and pale greyish green meaty chunks. An unfortunate amount of which just happened to be covering a brand new changeling queen, very similar in appearance to the previous one, if slightly smaller.

While this unexpected regime change was rather more abrupt, and less involved with the usual preliminary stages of egg, larva, and nymph that they had grown to expect from their own lifecycles, their was remarkably little panic.

Well, not from the witnesses anyway, as the new queen took in her situation, blinked a few times as she looked at her surroundings, her new minions, and then herself before she started screaming her head off.

Those changelings present who had some familiarity with foreign medicine nodded sagely at this. Screaming was a good sign for live births, as this meant that the newborn was breathing and had a healthy set of lungs.

The swearing was also a promising sign that the new queen was very advanced for her age, and suitably assertive for her position in the hive.

The fact that the lightning bolt that had sparked it all off had come from a clear blue sky with not even a single cloud in sight was noted, but as there was nowhere for an enemy flyer to actually hide the matter was merely entered into the records as "suspicious, cause unknown."

*O o O o O*

"Okay, let me get this straight. Your former queen, Chrysalis, is gone. Most likely telefragged when I appeared at her exact location in a flash of lightning from a clear blue sky..." the new queen began, as she settled into the large, multi-capacity bathing pool deep within the hive spire, where a pair of attendants were engaged in washing the sticky remains of their previous queen off of their new queen. Something that made said new ruler shudder every time she thought too much about it.

"Yes, my Queen," one attendant replied respectfully.

"Wait... What does telefragged mean?" the other asked in confusion.

"It's one of the potential results of attempting to teleport to a space already occupied by something else. Either one or both objects will be displaced to make room for the other object, or one or both objects will fragment as a more violent form of displacement. So: Telefragging is the result of forced fragmentation due to teleportation."

"Ah, I see, my Queen," the confused changling's expression belied this statement.

"He doesn't see, does he?"

"No, my Queen. She does not."

The new queen blinked at this correction, but did took no further action to rebuke either attendant.

"And because I'm here, and Chrysalis is, for lack of a better term, chunky salsa, I'm the new queen of this hive."

"Affirmative, my Queen. And the better term you are looking for would be either dead or deceased," the attendant explained to the young queen, assuming that even as mature and developed as she seemed to be, their new ruler was just born and so probably didn't understand the concept of death very well. Hmmm... Might want to keep the more expendable changelings between her and the rest of the hive in case the new queen was of a mind to break a few of her toys. Oh, wait...

"You have no idea what a metaphor is, do you?"

"No, my Queen. I do not," the attendant idly wondered if this was going to be her last few moments before the new queen decided to experiment with the concept of mortality now that she had been introduced to it.

"Um..." the confused one continued, oblivious to the possibility that she may be provoking their imminent demise by testing their new queen's patience. "What is chunky salsa?"

"Salsa is a spicy condiment derived from tomatoes, onions, peppers, and other vegetables that have been chopped up and mixed together for the purpose of either enhancing the flavor of otherwise bland or mildly spicy food, or disguising the flavor of food that has begun to spoil. Chunky just means that the ingredients are still in recognizable chunks of whatever they had been prior to being chopped."

"As you say, my Queen," the other attendant confirmed even as she began to plot the demise of the idiot whose questions were bound to eventually irritate the new queen into creating an opening for a new pair of bath attendants by eliminating her current ones as a way of demonstrating what she had been talking about. Not that the new queen had started yelling or berating either of them, but that just made the experience all the more unnerving.

"Are you alright? You're beginning to look a little pale..."

Both of the new queen's attendants were veterans of their former queen's bathtime rants and tirades, and had weathered years of casual abuse. Still, it took all the will power they could muster not to bolt at their new queen's strange concern. Showing concern was how Chrysalis liked to lead in before she did something truly horrible, and the more sincere she appeared to be, the more severe the inevitable outcome would end up.

The new queen, for her part, was beginning to wonder why her... well, she supposed that they were her subjects since they kept insisting that she was their queen... were suddenly trembling, and began to look around for whatever spooked them...

*O o O o O*

The new queen was inspecting the hive spire, familiarizing herself with it as best she could for a structure that only had a few continuous features nested within its otherwise ever-shifting interior. Said feature turning out to be the actual primary purpose of the magic absorbing throne, as without it the hive was vulnerable to giant burrowing predators such as maulwurfs and tatzlewurms that could threaten the entire colony. Granted, the magic absorbing properties of the throne that powered the effect weren't a perfect defense, the lightning bolt that had brought her into this world having disproved that adequately enough, but since it did serve an actual legitimate purpose to the benefit of the hive she decided to leave it intact.

Currently, she was in a chamber apparently known as the Hall of Queens, where each queen of the hive was supposedly depicted all the way back to the original founder. For the most part, almost all of the queens looked to be similar to Queen Chrysalis. Tall, dark, and menacing, with actual manes and the same unique eyes no other changeling had, although there was more color variation than she expected. However, at the far end of the hall, there were three displays that depicted queens of a much different appearance, more like what she remembered the changelings becoming when King Thorax took over the hive in the two part episode where former villains had saved the day.

"Humblebee?" She had taken the time to learn the name of the attendant currently assigned to her (the two that had assisted her in the baths had apparently come down with a case of nerves for some inexplicable reason, so she had sent them off to recover).

"Yes, my Queen?"

"Who are those three? And why do they look different?"

"Ah, those would be the Founder and her two immediate descendants, my Queen. As to why they look that way, I cannot say. Your mother had the royal archives sealed for at least a generation or two. Noling currently alive has even been within those chambers."

"Right. Can the archives be unsealed?"

"If that is your command, then yes, my Queen."

"That will be Our next stop then," she decided. First though, she was going to at least take a look at the names of her predecessors and read the plaques under their displays. Or have Humblebee read them for her, as she had yet to make sense of any of the writing she had come across. "Wait, scratch that, Humblebee. The archives can wait until after I've been tutored on how to read. Does the hive have tutors?"

"Yes, my Queen, the hive has several tutors and instructors that you may find suitable for your needs, whether it be literacy, mathematics, espionage, or shapeshifting. You may select any of them that you may desire."

"Something to do once the inspection tour is over then. In the meantime, would you mind reading off the names of my ancestors and provide a brief summary of what's written on their plaques?"

"Of course, my Queen," Humblebee stated, pleased that the new queen was taking an interest in the hive's history. "At which end shall I start?"

"The far end, Humblebee. I'd rather learn about my predecessors in the order they came for now."

"As you will, my Queen," Humblebee nodded in agreement as he led the new Queen to the far end of the chamber. He took note that a work crew had rushed in behind them once they had progressed far enough down the hall, presumably to attempt to quickly set up a display for Queen Chrysalis. Hopefully whatever they set up wouldn't offend the new queen.

The first display depicted an elegant figure of regal stature bearing an expression that somehow conveyed both wisdom and humor in equal measures.

"According to the plaque, Queen Amorphous Metamorphous, founder of the hive and first queen of Gandahar."

"Gandahar?" the new queen asked, cocking a brow at the unexpected names of both the queen and the nation.

"That's what the plaque says, my Queen."

"Okay. Carry on then."

"Next is Queen Ambisextra, who oversaw the completion of her mother's final designs and initiator of Gandahar's first diplomatic programs, forming various alliances with our neighbors during that era."

The new queen got the impression that Queen Ambisextra was supposed to have been drop-dead sexy, or was at least seen that way by whoever made the display. The next depiction showed a queen with a much more innocent appearance.

"Queen Nymphodora, the Childlike Empress, May her soul soar freely beyond the pains inflicted by this cruel world," Humblebee read somberly.

"I take it something bad happened to her?"

"The plaque does not say, my Queen."

"Oh. Well, on to the next queen then, Humblebee." The pair moved on to the first display depicting a queen with the darker, more sinister appearance of the later line, complete with legs riddles with holes.

"This would be Queen Epagogikí Allagí the Avenger, initiator of the first Great Change..."

And on Humblebee went, reading off each successive queen's name and a brief description as they passed their displays. Queen Malign the Terrible, Queen Amore Perdue the Great, Queen Mimsy the Mad, Queen Furiosa Opinione the Innovator, and so on, until eventually the two reached the final display.

"Humblebee."

"Yes, my Queen?"

"I can't help but notice that Queen Chrysalis' display is a bucket."

"So it is, my Queen."

"It seems to be filled with what I can only presume to be the remains of the former queen."

"That does appear to be the case, my Queen."

"Have that dealt with and get a proper display for Queen Chrysalis arranged."

*O o O o O*

Humblebee continued the inspection tour, leading the new queen away from the workers carrying out her instructions in the Hall of Queens. Hopefully they would put up a proper display of the late queen by the time her daughter returned to see it. Speaking of which...

"My Queen?"

"Yes, Humblebee?"

"Might I enquire if you have decided on a name yet? After all, your late mother had not left any instruction as to her heir's identity and as you know, she did not have a chance to name you directly."

The new queen blinked, then appeared to think about the question. "Then I can be whatever I want to be, can't I?" she asked herself under her breath.

"I beg your pardon, my Queen, but I didn't quite catch that."

"I said that I am Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe," the young queen stated more firmly.

"As you say, my Queen. I'll be sure to pass that along to the others." Humblebee resolved to ask the young queen how her self applied appellation was actually spelled once she became sufficiently literate, as it wouldn't do to offend her by making assumptions about her clearly made up name that didn't actually mean anything. It did, however, suitably resemble a phrase if parsed out, and one with regal enough asperations for a changeling queen.

"What?"

"Oh. Um... Nothing, my Queen. I was just distracted."

"You don't like my name?"

"Not at all. Ah, I mean, that I have no objections to the name you have chosen for yourself, my Queen. Whatevra Wa'Nabe is a perfectly fine name. And certainly better than any number of other things you could have chosen to call yourself..."

"What was that, Humblebee? I didn't quite catch that."

"Nothing! Nothing!"

Author's Note

Prereading and editing assistance for My Life As A Royal Changeling is provided by Spacebattles members Angelform, Baran3, Silver Storm Warden, & W34v3r.

Chapter 2

Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe considered the situation she had found herself in. She was a former human who had somehow ended up taking Queen Chrysalis' place as leader of the changeling hive in the Badlands. Or apparently Gandahar as the changelings called it. She already suspected, between some of the names in the Line of Queens and offhand (offhoof?) references that Humblebee had read off to her during the tour, that at least some of the previous queens had also been former humans from the same Earth that she had come from.

She half expected that, once she learned how to read changeling script, the records from Queen Amorphous Metamorphous' reign would be full of more references from seventies and eighties pop culture and science fiction. And probably a lot of prophecies full of was/will be tense confusion. Really? How did the main one go, anyway?

"In a thousand years Gandahar was destroyed; a thousand years ago Gandahar will be saved, and what can not be avoided will be."

"The prophecy..."

"The what now?" That was just a quote from the movie, wasn't it? Surely the First Queen didn't decide to troll her decendants with a nonsensical prophecy that didn't even apply to them in context, right?

"Queen Amorphous Metamorphous' prophesy," Humblebee elaborated. "It was written on her plaque but I didn't read it to you as, well, it has been well past a thousand years since the prophecy should have come to fruition."

"Humblebee, the prophecy refers to a broken time loop. It would have come full circle and been fulfilled during Queen Amy's reign."

"Queen... Amy?" Humblebee sounded scandalized. "My Queen, please show more respect for the First Queen. She is your direct ancestor after all. You can rename anyling else you want, as is your prerogative, but the Line of Queens should be sacrosanct."

"Queen Amorphous Metamorphous then," Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe huffed, feeling both embarrassed and annoyed.

"Still, the fact that you were able to recite the prophesy, line for line, when you cannot yet even read it. Surely you have been graced with the touch of Neverwhen." Among other things, Humblebee figured that this might explain how the young queen had been born nearly fully grown when she should have been laid as an egg like any other changeling. Granted, Queen Chrysalis hadn't born any other princesses prior to her daughter, so the life cycle of a royal could be different, but the implication presented by the Hall of Queens was that it wasn't all that different from that of other changelings except perhaps by breadth of scale, as some of the young queen's ancestors had lived truly extraordinarily long lives, with the beginings and endings of the lifespans of most queens overlapping according to the dates on the plaques.

Well, according to those dates, Queen Mimsey was apparently born on the same day Queen Amour Perdue died, so it wasn't like it was unheard of for the changelings of Gandahar to experience a sudden regime change because the previous queen died during childbirth. Fortunately, such incidents did not appear to be the norm...

"Perhaps we should head for the Royal Infirmary, my Queen. We really should make sure that you are not experiencing any health issues."

"I don't wanna."

"That's perfectly normal, but I really advise that you get yourself checked out. Your mother shared the same reluctance, and whiney tone about it, and pretty much ignored her health, and look what happened to her."

"Fine," Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe grumbled sullenly. "Wait, what was that bit in the middle?"

"Your mother shared the same reluctance?"

"No, the part after that."

"And pretty much ignored her health?"

"I'm going to have to keep an eye on you, aren't I"

"Keeping an eye on your advisors would be a wise habit to get into, my Queen."

*O o O o O*

"Now, if you would stick out your tongue, my Queen," Doc Mandible requested as he readied a resin tongue depressor to check the young queen's mouth...

*Thwip-yoink!*

"Very classy, my Queen. But those lollipops are usually for after my patients are through with their check-ups. Still, impressive striking range. Now spit it out and stick out your tongue again... Slowly! And say Ah."

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah."

"Oh dear, that is disturbing. Could you please take this seriously, my Queen, and not display quite so many teeth? The inner mouth has to go too. I'm trying to check you, my Queen, not whatever imaginary nightmare creature you can turn yourself into."

Humblebee just noted to himself that the young queen was at least better behaved during her check-up than her mother had been. Granted, Queen Chrysalis would usually rush into the Royal Infirmary, grab the bucket of lollipops while Doc Mandible or one of the other medics desperately tried to conduct her examination during the brief period she was actually there, and make a break for it, so it wasn't as if the bar was actually set very high.

*O o O o O*

"And these are the nursery chambers, my Queen," Humblebee explained as the tour continued after the young queen's medical examination. "Every changeling mother either lays her clutch here, or has her eggs brought here after they have been laid, where they are pooled together into crèche groups. Each crèche generally hatches around the same time, and the members are raised together from larva through nymph and into early adulthood, generally considering the other members of their own crèche to be siblings whether directly related or not. Your mother liked to be present for most hatching days, and tried to spend some time each week with at least one crèche, but otherwise left their care up to..."

"D'aww! They're adorable!"

Humblebee trailed off as the young queen wandered into the middle of a large crèche of nymphs, cooing and drawing their attention to her. And then Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe suddenly stopped, obviously tense and on high alert.

"Humblebee?"

"Yes, my Queen?"

"Why is there a giant spider over there in the corner, and is there any reason it shouldn't be killed with fire?"

"Ah, yes, that is a crèche spider, my Queen. The breed was domesticated long ago to help protect our young from smaller pests and parasites, as well as serving as an early warning system against the larger spiders that are known to occasionally inhabit the deep caverns below Gandahar."

"Giant spiders."

"Yes, my Queen."

"As in, bigger than that thing over there."

"That thing, as you call it, is Mister Wriggly. He was one of your mother's favorites."

"I'll try to keep that in mind. Now, is there any reason that we can't kill the giant spiders under Gandahar with fire?"

"From what Queen Chrysalis has told us, there hasn't been an incursion from below for nearly a thousand years, when she was very young. They have most likely been dealt with long ago."

"Nearly a thousand years ago. Great. Another time-release threat then. Tell me that Gandahar has an actual military force, Humblebee."

"There is the Royal Guard, my Queen. Meta Knight will see that you are properly protected, I assure you."

"That wasn't what I asked, Humblebee. Now what does Gandahar have in the way of actual military forces that can be deployed against threats."

"Ah, my Queen, that's not how changelings operate. We're more into dealing with threats by way of infiltration, espionage, and sabotage. And failing that, your mother was fond of the tactic she referred to as 'the Swarm Rush.'"

"Of course she was," Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe grumbled. "Do we have anyling who came back from more than just one or two of my mother's so-called swarm rushes?"

"I believe we have a few such veterans, my Queen. Off hoof, Mayhem and Calamity come to mind."

"Then get me Mayhem and Calamity, Humblebee. This tour is over. Oh, and summon Meta Knight while you're at it. It's time Gandahar had a proper military."

"At once, my Queen." Humblebee started to head off to do as the young queen instructed.

"Oh, um, Humblebee?"

"Yes, my Queen?"

"Have someling guide me to the throne room so I can actually be there once you have gathered Mayhem, Calamity, and Meta Knight."

"Of course, my Queen."

Chapter 3

Humblebee led the entourage of gathered changelings into the throne room, picking up Meta Knight last as the captain of the royal guard had been stationed right outside the doors of the great chamber anyway.

"Humblebee?"

"Yes, my Queen?"

"When I sent you to collect Meta Knight, Mayhem, and Calamity to meet me here, that would have been a total of three changelings plus yourself, correct?"

"That is correct, my Queen."

"I can't help but notice that you brought me... let's see now... ah yes. You have brought me twenty-one changelings. Now correct me if I'm wrong, Humblebee, but isn't that seven times the number of changelings I asked you to bring? Because I'm pretty sure that twenty-one is a bit more than three."

"You are indeed correct, my Queen," Humbelbee confirmed, proud of the new queen's math skills, so gifted for one who was only just born earlier that same day.

"Care to explain?"

"From the context of your request, I assumed that you would want additional veterans of your mother's previous campaigns."

"Well, showing initiative is a good sign, I suppose. And all of these are swarm rush survivors?"

"That is correct, my Queen."

"By any chance, are these all of the swarm rush survivors?"

"Yes, my Queen."

"Of course they are," the new queen grumbled. "Okay, let's get started then. Meta Knight, you stand over there, as you will only be peripherally involved in this. Now, anyling who isn't a veteran of at least two swarm rushes go stand over there. That few, huh. Okay then, anyling who hasn't been involved in more than two swarm rushes can go join them. That's better. Humblebee, in descending order, introduce the remainder to me by name and number of swarm rush campaigns survived."

"Of course, my Queen. First up is Mayhem, veteran of seven campaigns. Next is Calamity, who has weathered direct involvement with six swarm rushes. Then there are Inky and Flambé, who have each survived three swarm rushes."

"Flambé?"

"Yes, my Queen?" the named changeling piped up enthusiastically.

"Was that always your name, or were you renamed by my mother?"

"I've had the honor of being renamed twice by Queen Chrysalis, my Queen!"

"And what, pray tell, were your previous names, if you can remember?"

"I was born as Lampyridae, and my first redesignation was as 'Oh No, Not You Again," my Queen!"

"Congratulations."

"My Queen?"

"You're in charge of demolitions."

"My Queen!" Flambé puffed up proudly.

"As in, if anything in the hive blows up, catches fire, or is otherwise destroyed when it is supposed to remain intact, I'm holding you directly responsible."

"Yes, my Queen." Flambé visibly deflated.

"That said, I may have need of your presumed talent for pyrotechnics, and possible pyromania, fairly soon."

"Yes, my Queen!"

"Mayhem, Calamity?"

"Yes, my Queen?" the named pair responded.

"Do either of you have any actual training in combat, tactics, and/or strategy?"

"I have been on two tours undercover as a mercenary for the Confederation of the Wastes, and one tour undercover as a junior officer in Equestria's EUP forces, my Queen."

"And you, Calamity?"

"One tour on each side, my Queen. Both undercover."

"And what experience do you have outside of any swarm rushes, Inky?"

"..."

"What was that? I didn't quite hear what you said."

"The defect plays a bard in Bookworm's Ogre's & Oubliettes campaign, my Queen!" one of the changelings in the group set aside earlier snarked.

"Meta Knight?"

"Yes, my Queen?"

"That one is throwing off my groove. Deal with it."

"At once, my Queen!" Meta Knight approached the now trembling changeling who had taunted Inky. "I'm sorry, but you have thrown off the new queen's groove."

"I... but... I... AAAAaaaiiieeeehoohoohoo!"

Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe wondered idly at the narrative convenience involved in a window opening up in the throne room just then, but then shrugged and went on with her interviews without any further thought about the changeling that Meta Knight had just ejected. After all, it wasn't as if changelings couldn't fly.

"In any event, it has come to my attention that there are, or at least used to be, giant spiders large enough to have been a threat to changelings inhabiting the caverns beneath Gandahar. While I'm told that there hasn't been a notable incursion from below in nearly a thousand years, I would rather not find out that this is due to one of those 'time release monsters' or 'sealed evil in a can' situations, so I require someling to investigate the matter."

The gathered changelings blinked in confusion when the new queen mentioned time released monsters and sealed evil, but otherwise refrained from comment lest they too be forcibly ejected from her presence.

"Now, since I desire to actually receive the intelligence I am sending you after, I would like to ensure that you are all capable of surviving and returning from any bad situation you may potentially find yourselves in during the upcoming expedition. Therefore Meta Knight will be in charge of training you in combat. Specifically tunnel fighting. Particularly against known and hypothetical tactics and strategies that might be used by giant spiders. Mayhem, you will be the captain for this expedition, with Calamity as your executive officer, while Inky and Flambé will act as sergeants. The rest of you will be divided into two squads as appropriate, first decided by Meta Knight, and then later by either Mayhem or Calamity. Once you have all been sufficiently trained for the task ahead of you, additional changelings will be filtered in until the expeditionary force is sufficiently large enough to meet the requirements of the mission, with those already trained assigned to assist the new recruits in getting up to speed."

Everyling felt a bit of excitement as their new queen briefed them. Even if the assigned mission turned out to be little more than assuaging a newborn's fears, they were still being assigned actual training, and that alone would make each of them more valuable to the hive. And should their new queen's fears turn out to be valid, the training would ensure that they would be prepared to deal with it immediately, so the new mission was win/win as far as the hive, and thus everyling in it, was concerned.

"Meta Knight, Mayhem, Humblebee."

"Yes, my Queen," the three addressed responded in near unison.

"You three are to remain. The rest of you are dismissed to complete whatever tasks you were pulled from and then to prepare for when you are summoned to report for training."

"Yes, my Queen!"

"Well, what are you all standing around for? Go! Shoo! Get out of here!"

Once the throne room was otherwise clear, Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe spoke. "Humblebee."

"Yes, my Queen?"

"Prepare dossiers for each changeling involved in this new unit. I wish to be aware of any special talents, quirks, or skills that I need to be aware of, with copies going to Meta Knight and Mayhem as well. Be prepared to read them aloud to me, as this will be required until I am sufficiently literate enough to peruse them myself."

"Meta Knight."

"Yes, my Queen?"

"Just to be clear, you are neither training your replacement nor the replacement for the Royal Guard. What you are to accomplish is to train up a force suitable for dealing with external threats to the hive while still being able to assist the Royal Guard with dealing with any internal defense issues that might crop up. Mayhem, if he..."

"She, my Queen," Humblebee interjected.

"If she proves to be capable, is to be trained to be your equal, as she is to be your counterpart for the new force. Not your rival, but rather your partner in ensuring the defense of the hive and the interests of Gandahar. Do you understand what I am asking of you?"

"Yes, my Queen!" the Captain of the Royal Guard confirmed, eyes shining with pride and approval of the task laid out before him.

"Mayhem."

"Yes, my Queen?"

"If you prove to be up to the task, you will be the new commander, and eventually general, of Gandahar's military forces. You are to be the spear to the Royal Guards' shield. The thrust in the dark against our enemies, or even the quick buck to the face against those who dare to openly threaten Gandahar. You may also be called upon to provide aid to allies or potential allies of Gandahar as the situation warrants. This mission is to be your first test. Do you understand what I am asking of you?"

"Yes, my Queen."

"Very well. Meta Knight, Mayhem, I release you to your new duties. You are dismissed."

The two changelings left the throne room and headed for Meta Knight's office to discuss how they would go forward with their new tasks.

"Humblebee."

"Yes, my Queen?"

"Let me know the next time Bookworm has an Ogres & Oubliettes session scheduled. I wish to sit in discretely as an observer."

"Yes, my Queen."

"Also, I haven't eaten all day."

"I will have something suitable brought up from the reserves, my Queen." Humblebee bowed and turned to leave.

"Oh, and one more thing!"

"Yes, my Queen?"

"Don't forget the dossiers I asked for!"

"Of course, my Queen."

Once she was alone in the throne room, Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe, new queen of the changeling nation of Gandahar of all things and former human, slumped down on her throne and rubbed her temples with a hole riddled hoof. The day had been extremely stressful so far. Not only had she somehow become a completely different species, she had also been transported to whatever highly magical world that Equestria was on.

Well, Equestria and whatever the Confederation of the Wastes was. It sounded familiar, so she was sure that it would come to her eventually, but it sounded like they were in opposition to Equestria.

Oh, and her new subjects had spies on both sides of whatever the issue between Equestria and the Confederation of the Wastes happened to be. Or maybe the issue was between Gandahar and one or both of the other two. Fun.

But first there was the issue of the probable horde of giant freaking spiders just waiting for their thousand years of whatever was keeping them down there to go away before raiding the surface again! Those needed to die in fire. Lots of fire. It was bad enough that she'd have to get used to the domesticated crèche spiders, she wasn't about to suffer the possibility that there were even bigger and notedly hostile spiders lurking about ready to pounce from the shadows!

Trying to distract herself from the dark turn her thoughts had once again taken, the new queen idly wondered what sort of food Humblebee was going to bring her. Love based, presumably, but given that changelings apparently ate lollipops, it might well be something more substantial than the hazy mist of emotional energy that Chrysalis had been showing draining from Thorax...

Author's Note

Argh... Just realized that I neglected to put the note in the first chapter that the first six chapters are already finished and are going to be posted at a rate of roughly once per day or so. Hopefully chapter seven will be finished and ready to publish by the time chapter six is posted, but the current rate of posting will be slowing down once the backlog is cleared.

*O o O o O*

The Confederation of the Wastes

An exercise in world building

In the context of this fic (and possibly some of my other fics as well), the Confederation of the Wastes isn't an officially recognized nation so much as it is a collection of loosely allied pirates and bandit kings who use the Bone Dry Desert as a buffer against retaliation for their various nefarious activities. Kludgetown occasionally serves as what passes for a "capitol" for this alliance, but it's mostly just an isolated freeport that was originally built up around an oasis.

Think of the situation being somewhat similar to one of the ages of piracy in our own world: various factors contribute towards such things either being viable or not. In this case, the simultaneous existence of semi-rapid travel with huge buffer zones preventing swift military retaliation on the part of the nations victimized by the Confederation of the Wastes. While Equestria is one of those nations, there are additional buffers in the form of two jungles, the Hayseed Swamp, and the Badlands, all of which the various raiders use to try to dodge military patrols.

The changelings operating out of the Badlands (now revealed to be Gandahar) have spies on both sides for reasons that will come up later in the story.

Chapter 4

I sighed as I went over the day I had just had.

Which had started with intense, but thankfully brief, pain. Followed by finding myself covered in what I would later realize was changeling gore. Not to mention the fact that not only had I somehow changed species, I was now the queen of the changelings. Prereformation changelings. Specifically the late Queen Chrysalis' hive of changelings, in the Badlands, south of Equestria. Placing me in a world where the only previous knowledge I had about came from a children's show, a movie, a comic, and innumerable speculative art and fanfiction.

Any amount of which could be either frighteningly accurate or wildly off model, and I would never know which I was dealing with until I was able to do some research. And even then, I'd never be able to know for sure.

Where, or rather when, in the timeline was I? Before Thorax' ascension, certainly, but by how long? And did it even matter? I mean, it's extremely clear to me that I wasn't the first former human from my world to end up on this one.

Either that, or the names of Gandahar, Amorphous Metamorphous, and Ambisextra were the mother of all coincidences. Not to mention the prophecy I quoted from the very same movie.

How much would even be the same if somebody else had already been thrust into this world generations ahead of me, making God knows what changes just from being here so long ago?

"Pardon, my Queen, but Humblebee said that you requested sustenance?" A changeling entered the throne room, pushing a trolley. I recognized it... her... as the more sensible of the pair who had helped clean me up shortly after my arrival.

"You may approach," I stated, once again cribbing my phraseology from what little I knew of royal mannerisms. Mostly sourced from novels, movies, some television shows. And, yes, cartoons. Still, it seemed to be working so far, even if I caught my subjects giving me odd looks from time to time. At least noling had turned on me yet...

And that was another thing. Why the bloody Hell was I using ponyisms (or would that be changlingisms?) even in my head!?

Calm.

Remain calm.

Above all, don't panic

Huh. The tray on the trolley has a bit more variety than I had been expecting. Bowls filled with various consistencies, ranging from watery soup through jellies to one bowl of thick pudding. A plate with what I assume is the solids version of the variety platter, considering that it seems to have balls of gel, cookie-like things, and a sort of... I want to say cake? And a smaller tray of crystalized samples. Unfortunately, all of it being a particularly unappetizing shade of snot-green.

I poke at one of the gel things experimentally with a hoof, then carefully take a sniff of the offerings before me...

Well, at least it smells better than it looks, even if I can't identify the scent. A quick nibble proves that it also tastes better as well.

"Thish ish acshually pretty goosh," I comment, forgetting to swallow first. I correct that immediately. "Condensed love, right?"

"Yes, my Queen."

I couldn't really describe the flavor, as I had literally never tasted anything even remotely like it before in my life. This one or the previous one.

No point in worrying about going back. If it happens, it happens, but so far all signs point to "no." Otherwise my distant "ancestor" wouldn't have had the time to have founded Gandahar.

I really need to learn how to read so I can get started on those archives Humblebee told me about.

Well, that and find out what passed for written entertainment in this world. Daring Do novels of course (assuming that I hadn't arrived too early for A. K. Yearling to have started writing down her adventures), but what else? I seem to remember Spike reading a story about a heroic dragon to a group of kids at the Ponyville Hospital during one episode, and Rarity is apparently into mystery novels. Not to mention the fact that comicbooks were a thing here.

Assuming, again, that my knowledge of the show actually has any bearing at all on the world I've found myself in.

And I've just been sitting here, eating and thinking to myself while my attendant is standing there dutifully. Is she waiting for a command or a dismissal? I'm pretty sure I'm not supposed to give her ear-scritchies or a treat...

Oh, God, my mind goes off on some pretty damn strange tangents. Some people have trains of thought. My trains are rollercoasters. Complete with switchbacks, loop de loops, and sharks with freakin' laser bea...

Stop that, Brain! I'm trying to make with the thinky thinky here!

Hmm... The crystal things are a bit harder to chew than the other goop.

"Ah, my Queen, you are supposed to suck on crystalized love. If you chew on those, you could ruin your..."

CRUNCH!

"...teeth."

Jawbreakers never did last very long with me. I run my tongue over my teeth, but don't feel anything I hadn't when I had done so earlier, and no sudden pain either, so I figure that my new teeth are fine for now.

"Ah... My Queen, you might want to slow down your rate of consumption. You're projecting..." Aww, she's adorable! Like a big huggable cuddlebug! C'm'ere, you!

Author's Note

This chapter, thus far the only one in this fic done from Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe's first person perspective, was written this way as a response to those readers in the SpaceBattles forum who wanted at least a brief foray into this method for various reasons.

Chapter 5

Mayfly blinked as she ducked her head into the throne room to see if Katydid was still inside with the new queen. Of the various possible reasons for one of her fellow royal attendants to be delayed in returning from serving their new queen, good and bad, discovering that their new queen was curled up asleep on the throne, clutching the missing attendant as if she were a pony foal's plush toy had not been even remotely on her list of expectations.

"Help?" Katydid requested quietly, trying to gently extract herself from the queen of snuggles.

Mayfly took in the scene, noting the details. She hadn't survived over ten years as one of Queen Chrysalis' personal attendants by being slow on the uptake. "I see that you served our Queen a sampler platter from the reserves."

"I thought it would be a good idea to offer a variety to see which ones she preferred."

"You do remember that our new queen was just born today, right?"

"Yes, but she's clearly past the nymph stage."

"Irrelevant," Mayfly shook her head as she picked up a fragmented crystal from the tray. "You just fed crystalized love to someling who has never eaten love before. What did you think would happen?"

"That she would cackle madly and make some proclamation about power?"

Mayfly thought back on some of Queen Chrysalis' previous meals and conceded that megalomaniacal rhetoric would not have been an unexpected response to a queen receiving an unfamiliarly high amount of love while feeding. "Fair enough. How many crystals did she consume."

"Just the one, but she ate all the gel samples first. She didn't touch the soups."

"I'll have Cicada return them to the reserves."

"Wait, where are you going? Don't leave me here!"

"Relax. I'm just going to get Junebug, Ladybug, and Ladybird to help me extract you from our Queen's loving embrace, and then you can help us move her to the royal bedchambers and put her to bed."

"What if you can't get her to let me go?"

"Then you get to sleep in the royal bed with our Queen."

"Meep!"

"Just remember that our new queen, for all her apparent advanced development, is a newborn," Mayfly warned. "Sully her innocence, and Meta Knight is likely to have your carapace processed into a heater shield.

"Meep!"

"Really, you're starting to sound like Honeydew's assistant. What was his name again? I think it was vial, flask, or something similar..."

"Mimimimimimimimimimi!"

"Yeah, I'm definitely seeing the resemblance now. Now hush, you don't want to wake up our Queen."

*O o O o O*

As it turned out, even with the extra attendants on hoof, Katydid remained trapped in the sleeping queen's embrace as none of those present wanted to risk waking up their new sovereign.

"Please don't leave me!" Katydid pleaded desperately. "I don't want Meta Knight to kill me!"

"Oh?" Mayfly tilted her head curiously. "Who would you like to kill you?"

"That's not what I meant and you know it!"

"Fine, fine. Ladybug, Ladybird, you are on chaperone duty. Stay, observe, and make sure that nothing more inappropriate than snuggling occurs."

"But neither of us are on night shift!" Ladybug complained.

"You are now," Mayfly corrected as she turned and headed for the door. "Deal with it." And with that, Mayfly and Junebug left.

"So..." Ladybird glanced at Ladybug, "Think we can get some art supplies sent up? I think this would make a neat portrait."

"Please don't," Katydid protested quietly as she continued her attempts to extract herself from the queen's forelegs.

"Don't see how it would hurt to ask," Ladybug replied, ignoring Katydid. "I'll see if one of the guards will do a run for us."

"I hate you both so much right now," Katydid grumbled.

"Don't care," Ladybird stated.

"Do care. Think it's funny," Ladybug commented as she headed for the door to talk with the guards.

Chapter 6

"I don't want to wake her up! You wake her up!"

"No! You wake her up!"

"No! You wake her up!"

"Hey! I just said that! No fair!"

"Would you idiots stop arguing about who has to wake up our Queen and just wake her up already!"

"Why don't you do it!?"

There were, Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe relflected, far more pleasant things to wake up to than a group of changelings huddled together nearby, arguing in harsh whispers with each other over who had to wake you up.

"I have seniority. Someling other than me can wake up our Queen."

Releasing Katydid, Queen Whatevra quietly instructed the relieved attendant. "Snacks. Popcorn or something like it if we have any."

"Yes, my Queen," Katydid nodded before sneaking past her fellow attendants.

"Exactly! You have seniority, so you have responsibility!"

"I have never woken up our Queen before..."

"Of course you haven't! She was just born yesterday!"

"I meant even our previous queen, Chrysalis, you dolt!"

"So you shirked your duties even then!"

"I've been a royal attendant for over ten years! Do you think I would have lasted that long under Queen Chrysalis if I shirked any of my duties!?"

"In a heartbeat, if you thought you could get away with it!"

"Exactly! Which is why I'm delegating responsibility! You do it!"

"Fine! I delegate too! You do it, Ladybug!"

"You can't delegate to me, I'm your own sister!"

"I was laid first!"

"Well, I hatched first!"

Katydid snuck back in with a bowl of puffed love snacks, hoofing it over to the queen, and then sitting down when Queen Whatevra patted a spot next to her on the bed. The two then shared the snacks while they watched the others continue their argument.

"Let's delegate to Junebug!"

The attendant in question just levelled a gaze at Ladybird and Ladybug.

"Let's not delegate to Junebug!"

"Agreed! Katydid, you wake up our Queen!"

"Don't have to," Katydid snarked. "She's been up for a while now."

"Erk!"

"She's right, you know," Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe said with a grin. "Now care to explain why the four of you, while in what I am assuming is my bedchambers, felt the need to argue about who had to wake me up?"

"PLEASE FORGIVE US!"

"Perhaps, once I've figured out what I should be forgiving you for. First, some questions."

"Yes, my Queen," they all replied in near synchronicity.

"Introduce yourselves."

They all started talking at once, stopping abruptly when their sovereign glared at them.

"One at a time, starting from the left. I already know Katydid's name, so she's exempt. Begin."

"I am Junebug. I have been a royal attendant for the past five years, and am usually partnered with Mayfly on nightshift."

"I am Mayfly. I have served your mother loyally for over ten years and hope to serve you as faithfully during your reign, my Queen. As Junebug has stated, we normally see to any needs the queen may have during the night."

"I am Ladybird. My sister and I have been royal attendants for the past three years, having joined together. We rotate shifts with other attendants you have not met yet."

"I am Ladybug, the sister Ladybird just mentioned. We also acted as chaperones last night even though we weren't on nightshift and Mayfly and Junebug were."

"Hey!" Mayfly hissed her objection, presumably over being thrown under the proverbial bus, while Junebug remained stoic.

"Did anything happen?" Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe asked.

"Nothing more inappropriate than snuggling, my Queen," Ladybug reported. "Katydid attempted to extract herself from your grasp several times during the night, but did not succeed."

"Alright then. Katydid, you're off today. Get some rest. You two as well, Ladybug and Ladybird. Junebug, Mayfly, attend me."

"Yes, my Queen," all four responded once again in near synchronicity.

All in all, Katydid mused as she left the queen's chambers with the two sisters, the morning was going a lot better for her than she had expected.

*O o O o O*

Fully inspecting the hive spire took the better part of a week. In part due to the shifting nature of the internal structure, which tended to rearrange itself on a semi-regular basis barring only a few select facilities, and in part because Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe actually placed some priority on getting her education up to speed. Particularly her literacy, as she actually wanted to be able to read what was in the Royal Archives sooner rather than later.

At the moment she was hung up on discerning the vowels (the pointy bits) from the consonants (the other pointy bits), and the fact that their syllabus for learning their alphabet literally started off with "A is for Anger, B is for Bored, C is for [CENSORED]…" was both funny and depressing at the same time. And her tutors were both amazed and appalled by her progress.

"A."

"That's a double-u, my Queen," Spelling Bee corrected, his tone dripping with condescension.

"N."

"That's the a, my Queen." Really, while Humblebee could be snarky at times, he at least came across as amused, whereas Spelling Bee sounded like the only reason he could be bothered to teach his sovereign was because he had been instructed to do so by said sovereign.

"X."

"That's an o, my Queen." It was quite obvious to Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe that Spelling Bee had no actual desire to actually be there, teaching her, when he could presumably be off doing whatever it was he had been doing before (which, she later found out, had been writing an in-depth and very rudely lettered critique of the latest edition of volume three of the Encyclopedia Equestria, in which he had painstakingly pointed out each and every spelling mistake and grammatical error he could find).

"L."

"That's the a again, my Queen." And there it was again. That oh so special tone that gave Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe the feeling that Spelling Bee thought she was a blithering idiot.

"U."

"That's also the a, my Queen."

"R."

"So close. That's actually the s, my Queen."

"Fired."

"That's not a letter, my... Oh, I see what you did there, my Queen. Very droll. Should I send in the next tutor?"

"Please do. And report back to whatever duty you were pulled from. I only fired you as my tutor." The Noble Grammarian and Publication Society of Equestria would not be thanking Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe anytime soon for releasing Spelling Bee back to his self-appointed task of pestering them relentlessly. On the other hoof, once several schools in Equestria had compared notes and discovered that the reason that the books they were forced to rely on so much to teach their students were now being held to the same exacting standards that the NGPSE inflicted on everypony else, they decided to start hosting a celebratory interschool competition honoring Spelling Bee (oddly enough, the competition they chose to honor Spelling Bee with was a bake off featuring copious amounts of pi).

"Thank you, my Queen."

"And can someling bring me that book that was written in contemporary new ponish again? I could actually read that! Why do all of our letters have to look like eye gouging sharp angles and bug-splats anyway when we speak the same language that our neighbors do?"

"The history behind the basis of our particular alphabet is quite fascinating..."

"That was a rhetorical question."

"But it may be relev…"

"Rhetorical. Question."

"Yes, my Queen. I'll see myself out."

It took a while, but a tutor who was able to instruct the new queen without making her grumpy and irritable was eventually found. And once Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe felt that she was sufficiently far enough along to pursue self study, she placed the newly renamed Luminous Syllabus in charge of educating a cadre of nymphs, to see if her teaching methods were better suited for the task than those currently used by the hive's educational system.

*O o O o O*

Of course, even with the ongoing inspection tour, between spending so much time getting her education up to speed and the shifting nature of the hive itself, some things managed to escape the new queen's notice until they caught her attention in a big way.

"Humblebee."

"Yes, my Queen?"

"Did I just see a bunch of changelings..."

"Cluster, my Queen. A gathering of changelings is known as either a cluster or a swarm, depending on the overall size."

"Right." Well, at least Humblebee came across as sounding like he wanted to be genuinely helpful, even when he was snarky, which counted for a lot in Queen Whatevra's book. "Anyway, did I just see a cluster of changelings hauling what appeared to be an airship up the side of the spire?"

"I wouldn't know, my Queen. I saw no such thing myself, but I may have been looking in a different direction."

"They were right over there, visible through the window that was there only a moment ago."

"Give it a quarter hour, my Queen. I'm sure the window will open up again within that period. Perhaps the cluster with the airship will still be there at that time."

"I think that I'd prefer to meet them at their destination."

"That might not be wise, my Queen."

"Why not?"

"That's one of Honeydew's projects, my Queen. She's attempting to discover how airships fly."

"I see," Queen Whatevra stated in a tone that clearly indicated that she did not, in fact, see anything of the sort. "That still doesn't explain why it wouldn't be wise to meet them at their destination."

"This will be the third time that Honeydew has attempted to launch this particular airship. The second time she tried making the ship lighter."

"Well, that would be a step in the right direction."

"By reducing the size of the... I believe it is called an envelope?"

"And that's a mad dash in the exact wrong direction. Lead the way, Humblebee, I must speak with this Honeydew..."

*O o O o O*

"Now get in the test craft, Beaker."

"Mimimimimi!"

"Don't be silly, Beaker! You'll be perfectly safe this time! We lightened the load by removing the envelope entirely this time, so it won't be there for you to get tangled up in again if it achieves negative lift results. Stop being a sissy!"

"Mimimimimimimi!"

"Actually, you'll want to replace the envelope with a larger one rather than getting rid of it."

"Well, excuse me whoever you are, but who's the scientis… My Queen! Forgive me, my Queen!"

"You are forgiven. For now."

"Right, right. Now, you were saying?"

"Mimimi?"

"Not now, Beaker."

"Mimimimimimi!"

"Quiet, Beaker, can't you see that the Queen is speaking with us!?"

There was a snap and a sudden grinding noise of wood scraping across stone as the airship Beaker was on slid off the top of the spire and began it's third decent to the ground far below, much faster than the previous two attempts.

"BEAKER! GET BACK UP HERE! THE QUEEN SAID TO STOP THE TEST!"

"MIMIMIMImimimimimimimimimi!!!" CRUNCH

"Will he be fine?" Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe asked, her voice filled with concern.

"Oh, he'll be fine. This sort of thing happens to him all the time."

"Look, for the safety of the hive, I'm going to have you move all of your projects to... That mesa over there. I'll assign a security and safety detail for the protection of you and your staff. Just try not to get yourself or anyling else killed."

"I shall endeavor to do my best, my Queen! ah... Which mesa was that again?"

"That one. The black mesa."

"That's more of a burgundy, my Queen. Quite lovely, but not actually black at all, I'm afraid."

"Oh, trust me. It will be black soon enough." If nothing else, she expected that the mesa would be darkened eventually by Honedew's own experiments. And possibly Flambé's as well, as this seemed like a prime opportunity to relocate the little pyromaniac before she figured out how to ignite stone...

Author's Note

Okay, that's it for all six of the chapters that I had already posted on SpaceBattles.

Chapter seven is in progress, but nowhere near finished, so this is the end of the daily updates.

Chapter 7

Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe was perusing the records in the Royal Archives, having finally become familiar enough with the changeling alphabet that she no longer had to concentrate to remember which eye-jarring angular scribble represented which letter. For now, she was skimming various tomes, scrolls, and tablets in an attempt to get an overall feel for her new people's history and culture and try to see how close or far from the setting of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic the world she found herself in happened to be.

Unfortunately, the sheer scale of the records were daunting, apparently covering thousands of years of Gandahar's history, the bulk of which occurring prior to the founding of Equestria to the north. Which had happened during the reign of Queen Wisp, who had been Chrysalis' mother.

The gist of which being that, at the time Gandahar was founded, the region now known to outsiders as the Badlands had been a verdant basin filled with lush jungle and fertile fields, with numerous villages, towns, and cities. The jewel of which being the capitol city of Jasper, a sprawling changeling metropolis, and apparently a wonder of the world. A state that had been maintained until after the assassination of Queen Nymphodora a mere eighty years into her reign. Royal changelings, it seemed, could be expected to live many times longer than the regular varieties, with lifespans frequently lasting well past a thousand years. Queen Nymphodora's successor, Epagogikí Allagí, hadn't even been a "princess," although she had been selected from one of the fallen queen's brood clutches and fed specially prepared royal jelly until she took on the traits of a changeling queen. Once on the Throne of Gandahar, Queen Epagogikí Allagí's first official act was to use its power to seal the borders of Gandahar.

This, from what little Queen Whatevra was picking up by skimming the records, marked the start of what seemed to be a very long series of mistakes, set-backs, and misfortune as Gandahar slowly declined into a mere shadow of it's former glory over the course of several thousand years. And somewhere along the way, the changelings had undergone not one, but two Great Changes: The first altering the changelings' base form into what it was to this very day, and the second altering the changelings from a race that merely supplemented their diet and power with love to one that depended on consuming it for survival.

The once lush and fertile Gandahar was now the desolate Badlands, and all that remained of the proud metropolis of Jasper was the central hive spire. A spire that was itself a dilapidated husk of what it used to be.

It was no wonder that Queen Chrysalis had the Royal Archives sealed. After being in a state of perpetual decline for several millennia, Gandahar seemed to be in its final death throes, with the only remaining "city", if it could be called that anymore, being Jasper itself. Oh, there were other changeling hives, such as the Jungle Hive located somewhere in the Untamed Jungle on the far side of the Bone Dry Desert, or the Island Hive located somewhere in the Celestial Sea, but that's all they had ever been, just hives rather than nations. And now that's all Gandahar was, the Badlands Hive, just one of who knew how many or few changeling hives remaining hidden throughout the world.

And if nothing changed to stop this decline, within a few generations of the common changelings, the Badlands hive would be gone.

Queen Chrysalis had been growing desperate. Not quite enough to outright attack Equestria yet, but Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe could see why she had done so.

"My Queen?"

"Yes, Humblebee?" Queen Whatevra looked up from the book she was currently studying.

"Meta Knight has requested your presence as an observer. Mayhem's unit is ready for their first combat trial."

"So this is going to be them verses a unit of Royal Guards?"

"Not exactly, My Queen."

"Then what are they going to be fighting? A maulwurf? A tatzlewyrm?"

"My Queen, they are going to be fighting Meta Knight."

Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe blinked, then tilted her head before getting up to follow her advisor. "Katydid, Cicada, continue tidying up the Royal Archives but leave the records I selected on the table for now. If I am not back by the time you're done, return to my suite."

"Yes, My Queen!" the two attendants responded even as they continued their assigned tasks.

"Katydid and Cicada are permitted breaks during which they may leave and return to their current task, but allow noling else within the Royal Archives until I return. If my attendants finish tidying up the chamber before I return, reseal the doors once they leave," Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe instructed the guards as she left.

*O o O o O*

What currently passed as Jasper's primary military training center consisted of several semi-permanent chambers and halls near the ground level and mostly within the southwest section of the spire. They were similar to the facilities used by the Royal Guard, located higher up the spire closer to the Queen's Chambers, but not as well defined nor as well "anchored" in place. Which suited the Queen's agenda just fine as she expected to have them relocated eventually once her army was large enough.

The particular chamber Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe was guided to was actually an elevated alcove overlooking another, larger chamber where the trainees were gathered before Meta Knight. She noted the presence two Royal Guards maintaining a force shield between them separating the alcove from what she mentally dubbed the arena, presumably there for the safety of the observers should things get too energetic during training.

All twenty-one trainees were present, arranged neatly into two separate squads led by Inky and Flambé, with Mayhem and Calamity standing somewhat ahead of both squads as their overall leaders. The formations was not what the Queen would call parade perfect, as she noted the occasional changeling shifting their stance or briefly flaring their wings, only to settle back into position with a command from their sergeants (who were both taking their positions seriously, Wa'Nabe was pleased to note).

And facing them all was Meta Knight, who was positioned to be able to observe both the trainees and the alcove above them. At the Queen's nod, he began the training exercise.

*O o O o O*

"I've been given to understand that many of you feel that you've received enough training to be proper soldiers," Meta Knight addressed the gathered trainees. "That you feel that the training you have received so far, in combination with the experience you have all had with surviving the swarm rushes preferred by Queen Chrysalis, are more than enough to serve the hive on the field of battle."

"Well, obviously," snarked the recently renamed Waterbug, who had been accepted into the troop despite having been tossed out of the spire. His behavior was still problematic, bordering on insubordinate and lacking in discipline, but at least he wasn't actively insulting his fellow trainees anymore. Being the bottom ranking member who had to fetch and carry for everyling else in the unit had done much to break at least that particular habit, if not his habit of mouthing off when he was supposed to remain silent like the rest of the trainees.

"Be quiet, Waterbug!" Sergeant Inky cowed the errant trainee back into place for the time being. One interesting development Meta Knight had noted during training was that, despite being unable to change forms, Inky was physically more fit than the base forms of any of the other changelings in the unit, Mayhem and Calamity included. He had certainly proven to be a better one on one fighter than any other ling in the unit, much to Waterbug's consternation.

"Now now now, Sergeant," Meta Knight chided, "I'll be handling the discipline for today's exercise myself. In fact, today's session should do just that quite nicely, without any extra punishment required."

"Why are we being punished for Waterbug mouthing off!?" another changeling, Flake, demanded, eliciting a raised brow from several of the changelings present, Meta Knight, Mayhem, and Calamity included, while several others put a hoof to their faces.

"We're in for the long haul now," Frost observed in her usual dry monotone.

"Indeed you are!" Meta Knight agreed cheerfully. "Acting Captain Mayhem, your unit has earned you zero prep time today. You may commence the attack immediately."

"What are we attacking?" Mayhem asked, looking around sharply even as she and the rest of her troop tensed for action.

"Why, me, of course!" Meta Knight proclaimed just before leaping forward to strike Mayhem hard enough to send her flying back through one of the squads, bowling several changelings over in the process.

With that, the battle that would come to be known as the Trainee Smackdown had begun...

*O o O o O*

Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe blinked with a slight flinch back as one of the trainees struck the shield and stuck there for a moment before sliding down a bit with an intermittent squeaking noise before falling all the way off with a pop.

"This seems to be a bit on the excessive side for training," the young queen commented as she set Humblebee back down (having most certainly not just reflexively grabbed her chief advisor to use as a changeling shield - nope, never happened).

"I wouldn't know, My Queen," Humblebee replied as he straightened up, pleased that his new queen's first reaction was to defend herself, even if it had been a bit disconcerting to have been the closest changeling when she had done so.

"Who was the changeling who hit the shield? I want to say... Waspinator?"

"I believe his name is Dungbeetle, My Queen."

"No. It's Waspinator now. See to it that he's informed of his name change."

"At once, My Queen," the advisor complied, standing up to carry out his new orders.

"After the battle, Humblebee."

"Of course, My Queen."

"Sit back down, Humblebee."

"Yes, My Queen."

The fact that Humblebee had... incidentally, he would assure you... sat down just out of foreleg reach of Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe did not help the next time another trainee hit the shield after being tossed across the arena by Meta Knight, as the wing on that side shifted into an alarmingly flexible appendage that wrapped around him and thrust him in front of his queen once again.

*O o O o O*

Dungbeetle (who has yet to be informed of his impending name change), shook his head to clear it as he got back up. This was, he immediately thought to himself, his second mistake so far (the first being to charge mindlessly forward at Meta Knight at the start of the battle). His third mistake was that he was running right back into battle as if this was one of Queen Chrysalis' swarm rushes, but he knew that he wasn't the best tactical thinker in the unit, and maybe he could buy some time for those who were better at it than him to regroup and come up with an actual plan...

Dungbeetle's impromptu cry of "WHAT THE *klick* IS WRONG WITH MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!?" as he fell back into the familiar tactics of the old way was yet another mistake, as it not only had a negative impact on the morale of those who heard it, but also drew Meta Knight's attention directly to him.

In the end, Dungbeetle's sacrifice play bought the unit maybe half a second of reprieve as Meta Knight dealt with his reckless charge. Fortunately, he didn't get a chance to make another mistake as he was promptly sidelined yet again, this time staying down due to actually being unconscious...

*O o O o O*

The soon to be renamed Waspinator would probably have been, if not pleased, at least appreciative that the half second he had paid dearly for with his sacrifice play was indeed used by several of his fellow trainees...

*O o O o O*

Frost quickly cast several Icewall spells in rapid succession to spread scattered barriers throughout the arena for her fellow changelings to take cover behind while Flambé guarded her with a ring of fire...

*O o O o O*

Waterbug spent that brief moment dragging Acting Captain Mayhem behind the ice barrier he noticed Moth ducking behind, where the two worked desperately to revive their semi-conscious leader...

*O o O o O*

Rose, Onyx, Sapphire, and Emerald shifted into a single giant gestalt form of a cave troll, with Amber taking the form of a suitable weapon to threaten Meta Knight with...

*O o O o O*

Calamity assumed the form of a giant Rockbiter Scarab and angled to come at Meta Knight's flank...

*O o O o O*

Inky charged in, ducking under Meta Knight's first counterblow in order to grapple the Royal Guard and hold him in place for R.O.S.E. and Calamity while Waterbug and Moth revived Acting Captain Mayhem...

*O o O o O*

Meta Knight laughed with disturbing joy as he witnessed the fruits of his training. Counter-grappling Inky, he used the brave but unfortunate changeling to disarm R.O.S.E., sending Amber unconscious into the same force barrier that he had sent Dungbeetle into before, knowing that the barrier would be more forgiving than the wall. He then tried to use Inky to strike Calamity with the follow-through swing, but Inky was having none of it, having twisted around to reverse the grapple yet again.

Unfortunately for Inky, Meta Knight shifted out of the otherwise strong hold just in time for the combined flanking strikes from Calamity and R.O.S.E. to hit him instead, taking him out of the fight for the moment. Sturdy bug, that Inky, being dazed but not out...

Taking the form of a gorgon, Meta Knight grabbed Calamity's Rockbiter Scarab form (good choice!) by the mandibles, using her momentum to swing her into R.O.S.E., breaking the gestalt form back into Ruby, Onyx, Sapphire, and Emerald, who immediately scattered to take cover behind various walls of ice. Calamity also shifted forms to effect a retreat behind yet another such barrier...

Inky managed to recover enough to grab Meta Knight's gorgon form by the oversized snake tail, swinging the Royal Guard into one of the new walls of ice, which quickly grew more ice to encase him. Frost's work, no doubt. Best to do something about her sooner rather than later.

Shifting from gorgon to yak, Meta Knight smashed his way out of his icy prison and charged directly at Frost, shifting into a cragodile form as he reached the ring of fire...

*O o O o O*

Flambé watched in horror as Meta Knight ignored her Ring of Fire, charging right at Frost in the form of some giant lizard thing made of stone. Shoving Frost out of the way, Flambé took the charge instead, doing the only thing she could think of as Meta Knight's massive form struck her - she set herself on fire! "BURN! BURN, DAMN YOU! BURN!"

*O o O o O*

Acting Captain Mayhem set aside her horror at Flambé's self-sacrifice play, rallying the remaining trainees to brace themselves against several of the ice walls Frost had formed. The moment Meta Knight knocked Flambé out (incidentally stopping the pyre effect) and tossed the now charred changeling out of the way, Mayhem shouted: "NOW! PUSH!"

*O o O o O*

Meta Knight turned to watch a sea of ice walls sliding towards him. Taking flight, he noted that the ice walls in his path grew taller to meet him anyway. Within moments, he was rammed against the wall of the arena as wall after wall of ice were added to the growing shell, trapping him in a frigid prison of ice...

*O o O o O*

"More Ice, Frost! Don't let up for a moment!" Mayhem ordered. "Moth! Waterbug! See to Flambé! Inky! You good?"

"I'm good."

"Great, you're with me and Calamity. Ruby, pick another form for your gestalt and stand ready!, My Queen, you... My QUEEN!"

"This fight is over," Queen Whatevra Wa'Nabe stated coldly, less than pleased with how out of control things had gotten. "See to the injured and have Meta Knight dug out of that mess. And once everyling has been seen to and medically cleared, I want to see you and Meta Knight for debriefing."

"I'll see to it immediately, My Queen," Acting Captain Mayhem acknowledged, noting that Queen Whatevera Wa'Nabe seemed to be very much her mother's daughter as she turned and left the training arena braced by the two Royal Guards from the alcove, with Humblebee hurrying along behind her (after stopping briefly to say something to Dungbeetle).

Chapter 8

Captain Mayhem reflected on how far they had all come during the months since Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe had assumed the throne. Under Queen Chrysalis, the only permanent military unit the Badlands Hive could be said to have had been the Royal Guard, commanded by Captain Meta Knight. Which, due to their connection to the Throne of Gandahar, could not actually leave the Badlands without losing the empowerment that made them so effective as defenders of the hive. The best training that a changeling could otherwise hope for under the late Queen was if they happened to be lucky enough to have been able to temporarily replace an officer, soldier, or mercenary of either Equestria or the Confederation of the Wastes. Or, if they were very fortunate, both.

Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe had deemed this to be inadequate, and had thus had set out to fix this issue straight away. On the very day she was born. Granted, the initial motive seemed to be the new Queen’s fear of giant spiders invading the hive-spire from below. Something that only ever happened in nymphs’ stories and really really old history books, but Mayhem didn’t consider it to be her place to question how necessary the mission the Queen had set them on actually was. If her Queen wanted Mayem to hunt for closet monsters, then closet monsters were what she would hunt.

The fact that this closet monster hunt came with exceptional training was just a bonus, really, and Mayhem knew better than to look a gift lover in the mouth (for one thing, the dietary requirements of other races sometimes made this practice a little disquieting - especially if they didn’t brush their teeth first).

And it wasn’t like they weren’t doing anything useful during their search for their long absent ancestral enemies, as it had been long enough since the last time the various tunnels and caverns below the Badlands had been charted that the maps had gotten more than a little out of date. Mostly due to the activities of Maulwurfn, tatzelwurms, and the occasional foray of Diamond Dog miners poking around for gems. Not that changelings got lost easily, given the constantly shifting nature of the hivespire they lived in, but it was nice to have at least a general idea of where things actually were in the more static regions of their kingdom.

“Another set of new tunnels,” Lieutenant Calamity noted. “Tatzelwurm work by the look of them. The rock in this area is just soft enough for them, and we’re far enough away from the hivespire to be outside the protection of the Throne at this depth.”

“There’s going to be another sinkhole at this rate,” Mayhem observed. “If I’m right about where we are, then this is about seventy-five klicks north by northeast of the hivespire. Nothing of value above ground, and nothing more notable between the surface and us than a long abandoned Diamond Dog warren.”

“Wouldn’t that be within the anti-magic zone? I know the field doesn’t spread as far underground, but even this far out it should still be running deep enough to drain away any expressed magic not produced by a Changeling that close to the surface.”

It was different above ground, where the anti-magic field was apparently shaped like a huge cylinder or dome (noling could really tell, since the field itself wasn’t actually visible other than how it affected any expressed magic that didn’t come from a Changeling). Below the ground, the field was more like a compressed disc or lens in shape, even though it did still ran pretty deep into the Umbradepths under Gandahar.

“I was there for the raid Queen Chrysalis sent to clear them out. Apparently these particular Dogs brought mining tools with them rather than simply relying on their claws. We still have them in storage if you want to see them sometime.”

“The Dogs or the tools?”

“Yes.”

The two officers grew quiet as Sergeant Inky trotted up to them. “Sirs, Flambé and Frost have come across another pony camp. Waspinator says that it looks older than the last one we found. He’s pretty sure he can now track the pony who made them both though.”

Captain Mayhem thought about it for a moment, before coming to a decision. “Do it. Once you find the pony, stay back and observe unless they seem to be in trouble and send Waterbug and Aphid to come get me.”

“Yes, Captain!”

“Now where’s your designated buddy? The Queen said never to separate our units down past two buddies if we could at all avoid it while we we on this mission.”

“Clyde is dropping off copies of the charts we made and picking up more quills, inks, and parchments, Sir.”

“Fair enough. Try not to get separated outside of any of the camps.”

“Yes, Captain!” And, with that, Sergeant Inky was off to rejoin his buddy.

“We’re not capturing the pony?” Calamity asked.

“Not unless they seem dangerous, or happen to match any Equestrian wanted posters that we know are still current,” Mayhem shook her head in response. “Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe intends to make diplomatic overtures with Equestria some time in the next few years, so it would be helpful if reports about peaceful encounters with us started filtering into their rumor mill.”

“We could just fake those.”

“Yes, but this gives us an opportunity to have a report backed by a pony that isn’t actually an infiltrator who has to return eventually. Apparently, eye witnesses that don’t spontaneously disappear after a year or two are easier for other governments to accept for some reason.”

“Weird. Then again, ponies do tend to form more long term associations than other races, if what we’ve seen in the Confederation of the Wastes is any indication. Should I have the other sergeants bring their squads in? It’s one thing to spread out like this when all we have to do is keep track of possible tatzlewurms, but a pony complicates things.”

“Somewhat. Have them tighten the overall search spread, but keep the size of each squad between four to eight members in a group. We don’t want to leave any one squad too weak to fight off one of the big tunnelers until reinforcements arrive, nor do we want to risk losing too many at a time to any one tunnel collapsing on them. We’ll reorganize again once we’re back in a more stable section.”

The Changelings of Gandahar were still getting used to the differences between how their late Queen, Chrysalis, had run things and how their new Queen, Whatevra Wa’Nabe operated. One of the biggest being that the young Queen apparently cared more about their lives than the old Queen had. Not that either of them were wrong: their subjects were their subjects, to use and direct as the Queens saw fit. The Changelings just had to… adjust… to Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe’s personal style.

Mayhem idly wondered if the ponies would have to make similar adjustments if the rumors she had heard of their Queen’s selection of an apprentice with a similar design on her flank turned out to be true. The Confederation hardly had proper leadership to speak of as far as anyling could see, but noling could deny that Equestria was successful. Maybe that was why Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe wanted to forge an alliance? After all, with Queen Chrysalis having died in childbirth, the young Queen had no one with proper experience in the hive to teach her what noling remaining in the hive really could.

“Do you think it’s time to contact the Queen, since we now know that the pony is heading deeper into our territory?” Calamity prompted, drawing Mayhem out of her musings. The young Queen encouraged her officers to think, but the Changelings were still getting used to how to properly balance between thought and action now that they were expected to do some of the process themselves. Granted, they were also getting used to having officers other than the Captain of the Royal Guard, and Captain Meta Knight hardly interacted with anyling other than his fellow guards prior to training the new army.

“All we have to report so far is two camps and a general heading for a single pony, but you’re right. The Queen probably would want to know that there’s a pony heading deeper into Gandahar. I’d also like to be able to tell her why, but it’d probably be a good idea to contact Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe so she can decide how we are to proceed with contact.”

There was a muffled rumble and a wash of air traced with barely noticeable flecks of ice and cinders.

“Apparently the Dirty Pair have found the Tatzlewurm,” Calamity commented dryly.

“They prefer to be referred to as the Lovely Damselflies.”

“The Queen has referred to them by both designations.”

“The Queen isn’t down here with them. We are.”

“The Queen has referred to them by both designations, to their faces, while reprimanding them for explosively redecorating the Black Mesa facility last month.”

“She’s the Queen. She’s automatically far scarier than anything those two could come up with on their own.”

“Point.”

“Besides, I think the Queen was more irritated that their stunt didn’t actually paint the Black Mesa facility black.”

“I’m still wondering where they got that much dayglow yellow myself.”

*O o O o O*

Moonbeam peeked out from behind the stalagmite she had hidden behind and stared at the half crispy/half frozen remains of the giant worm monster that she had been running from. The head was even more horrifying now that she was able to get a proper look at it: it had a huge head with a triple jawed mouth large enough to swallow a pony whole; inward angled teeth intended more for preventing food from escaping than actually chewing, and several tentacle-like tongues.

“Eeep!” One of the tongues just moved!

Only to be frozen in place and then blasted with fire, just like what had happened to the bulk of the creature only moments ago, albeit on a smaller scale this time.

She could barely see her rescuers against the background of faintly glowing lichen (broken up by numerous pitch black splotches that she now realized were freshly dug tunnels bored through the rock by the worm thing). They were… pony shaped, at least. With eyes that shone bright blue with the reflected light from her lantern. And… Was something wrong with their legs? It was hard to tell with them standing almost all the way out of the light cast by her lantern.

Maybe these cave ponies were like the ones from that time machine novel? Marelocks or something like that? Oh, she hoped not. Marelocks weren’t nice ponies, even if they could sort of be held at bay by bright lights.

“Are you okay?” one of the shadows asked in a concerned tone. Oh, good, these cave ponies were civilized! Moonbeam suddenly felt much better about her situation than she had moments ago.

“Thank you so much!” she gushed, her voice heavy with relief. “That giant worm thing surprised me and started chasing me! I was trying to circle back to where the surrounding rock was granite rather than sandstone, but I think I took a wrong turn…”

“No,” one of the cave ponies interjected. “Had you gone another twenty paces in the direction you were running, you would have reached the pocket of granite you were looking for.”

“Well, still, I am really grateful for the rescue regardless.” Oh, right, she needed to introduce herself… “Ah… My name is Moonbeam…”

“I am Flambé, and my partner’s name is Frost. Our Queen has designated us as her Lovely Damselflies.”

“Queen, eh? Well, I knew I wasn’t in Equestria anymore anyway, but I never even dreamed that there were any kingdoms under the Badlands.”

“Oh, Gandahar is not just under the Badlands. The entire basin is the sovereign territory of our Queen.”

“Are you really sure that you should be telling this pony that much, Flambé?” the one apparently called Frost asked in a cool tone.

“Nah, it’ll be okay. I’m being duplicitous!”

“I think you mean diplomatic.”

“Same thing, right?”

“Hardly. And if you were using the right word, then you were doing it wrong.”

“Was not!”

“Were too!”

“Was not!”

“Were too!”

“Was not!”

“Were too!”

“Let’s ask the Captain!”

“You were using it wrong, Flambé,” stated a voice, suddenly, from way too close behind Moonbeam. She spun around and got a really good look at what could only be a Bug Pony. With lots of other bug Ponies right behind her. Moonbeam’s body chose that exact moment to give her brain a break and settle down for an impromptu nap…

*O o O o O*

“...and that is the situation as it currently stands to the best of what I have been able to determine from my troops and my own observations, my Queen,” Captain Mayhem’s voice reported crisply through the scarab-comm system’s voice only mode (which only required two of the specially enchanted talismans at this range and depth beneath the surface).

“I see,” Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe replied. “Copy Paste was right to forward your call to my immediate attention.” She idly noted that the clerk had perked up at this comment, seeming to be pleased with a job well done. Whatevra let the assumption stand as it was correct in this instance. Copy was at least trying to do well with her current assignment, and could be trusted to dutifully register and duplicate each report that came through her without bias or embellishment, even if she did have some difficulties with determining what needed who’s immediate attention and what could be left for weekly compiling and review.

“Have someone familiar with Pony bedding arrange something reasonably comfortable for Moonbeam to rest on while she recovers,” Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe instructed. “And set her supplies nearby so that she can see that they have not been taken from her. She is to be guarded but not detained. I wish to speak with her once she awakens, but allow her to fully awaken at her own pace and try to put her at ease.”

“Yes, my Queen!”

“Without using any spells, potions, or venom unless it is actually medically necessary.”

“...Yes, my Queen!” The slight hesitation before Captain Mayhem’s reply told Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe that she had made the right call in issuing the additional instruction. Her little Changelings were learning how she wanted them to do things, but they still had a long way to go.

“I will remain available until moonrise. If she has not awoken on her own by then, pod her and bring her back to the hivespire to hand off to our medical specialists, then report directly to me immediately afterwards even if my aides have to awaken me. I will inform them and my guards to be prepared for this eventuality so that they will not be surprised if you try to reach me in my chambers.”

“Yes, my Queen!”

“Now, before I end this call, is there anything further to report.”

“No, my Queen. That is everything I have to report at this time.”

“Very good. Then I will leave you to your current duties. Dismissed.” Breaking the connection, Whatevra left the communications hub, heading back towards the Royal Archives. Then thought better of it and decided to head for Intel and Coordination instead. Moonbeam sounded vaguely familiar and she didn’t know why, so she was going to check to see if any recent reports had come through Gandahar’s intelligence network.

If not, then she was going to have to try to remember where she had heard of a pony by that name from her previous life. Which was going to be a headache, as Whatevra knew that Moonbeam was neither a major nor recurring character from the show itself. Maybe a minor role or a one-off? Or possibly an OC from some other source?

Oh, this was going to bug her for a while. Hopefully it would either come to her or otherwise turn out to be unimportant, but for some reason the young queen felt that remembering who Moonbeam was might turn out to be very vital indeed...

Chapter 9

Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe ended up going over a few of her upcoming plans with Cloak, Dagger, and Veil, three of Gandahar’s top spies who had only just recently returned to the hive-spire to confirm the regime change for themselves. That they each accepted the new Queen once meeting her was only a little surprising to Whatevra by this point, and even that much was because these were highly competent infiltration specialists whom she had half expected to be more suspicious of her.

Then again, Queen Whatevra’s subjects did a lot of things that didn’t quite make sense to her.

“Okay, Veil, I want you to do some research on Equestria’s entertainment industry. Find out where their best schools for actors, dancers, singers, and other performing artists are, what their enrolment fees are, and then return to the hive with a compiled list. Once you return, I should have several prospective infiltrators and gatherers ready for you to interview and place in the most appropriate school under assumed identities. Include yourself in that list.”

“Yes, my Queen. May I ask why?”

“You may.”

After a moment’s waiting, Veil spoke again. “What is the purpose of this mission? Performers are usually too high profile to replace for long periods. Their skills tend to be too specialized and specific to fake for long.”

“That’s why you aren’t going to be replacing anypony. The cover identities and backgrounds will all be created by Bookworm, and you will all be attending as actual students of those schools. Ponies throw a lot of free love at performers, so we’re going to try placing some changelings as actual performers to see if the return investment is worthwhile.”

“I will not fail, my Queen!”

“See that you don’t.” Turning her attention to the other two, the Queen continued. “Cloak, Dagger, I want you two to select a small unit to train up as a free-range ninja party force.”

“My Queen?” Dagger asked, tilting her head in confusion.

“Unhappy ponies make for poor yields,” Whatevra explained. “If we had a covert team of free-range ninja party planners, they could seek out the places where ponies seem to be particularly unhappy and BAM! Instant party!”

“My Queen?” This time it was Cloak who tilted his head in confusion.

“Okay, maybe some more research needs to be done to see if this is even viable. Or, for that matter, for you to understand what I’m going for. In fact, why don’t you go out and find a party planning pony and covertly observe them for a while until you have an idea of what I’m trying to go for here. Just don’t spend more than a year doing so.”

“Yes, my Queen!” Cloak and Dagger responded, happy that they were at least going to be given a chance to study what a party planning pony even was before starting whatever their main mission actually turned out to be.

“Dismissed.”

As the three left the Intelligence room, Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe went back to perusing the various reports. She still had no idea as to what to do about the various creatures held in the pod chambers. Some were criminals from their respective lands of origin, but others were simply ponies or other creatures who, for whatever reason, had been easy and convenient to pod and replace. Some of them had been there for decades already, or even longer, weathering the ravages of time as few others outside of a pod could, tended by specially trained caretakers who monitored their health and emotional output.

The love gathered in this way was far from the best possible quality, but it was steady enough to make up for any shortfall from gathering operations. And, from the records, it seemed that the gatherers were always falling short on the love needed by the hive, so it wasn’t like Whatevra could just have them all released and be done with it. Sure, it was probably morally wrong to just keep them podded indefinitely, but it was also morally wrong to allow her subjects to starve and for the moment those prisoners were part of the delicate influx of love that kept everyling fed and healthy. Maybe once the gatherers had more efficient methods of bringing greater amounts of raw love in…

“My Queen.”

“Yes, Humblebee?”

“Copy Paste said that Captain Mayem is on the scarab-comm. Apparently somepony by the name of Moonbeam is awake and ready to speak with you.”

“Excellent! Have someling tidy these up and file them properly. I’ll go over them again later.”

“At once, my Queen.”

*O o O o O*

Moonbeam fidgeted as she waited by the large rock the beetle-like talismans had been placed on. She was mildly embarrassed and ashamed with herself for fainting at the appearance of her rescuers. Sure, they might look like some sort of horrific amalgamation of insect and pony, and the holes in their legs were really disturbing the more she thought about them (so stop thinking about them, dammit!), but thus far they had done nothing but keep her safe and comfortable…

And maybe root through her stuff, but apparently that was just Flake being too curious for her own good, as Moonbeam had awoken to Moth scolding the flustered changeling and ordering her to put everything back the way she had found it.

It helped that she wasn’t being held against her will. In fact, she was explicitly informed that, while their queen would like to speak with her, she was free to go any time she wanted to, although she was likely to have at least a small escort for as long as she was within their kingdom. Which was really something of a relief, if Moonbeam was to be honest with herself, given the existence of giant pony-eating worm-things and presumably other monsters she hadn’t been aware of.

“...do you think the tiny statues are for?” Moonbeam overheard Flake ask what she assumed was another changeling as their wanderings once again brought them within earshot.

“They are called figurines,” a different voice responded. “Like those things Bookworm uses for her O&O sessions.”

“Ah. Training aids then,” Flake concluded. “They must be for a more specific set of scenarios then, since there were tiny buildings and market stalls as well. Maybe she’s a traveling teacher or consultant of some sort?”

“Who knows. It’s not like either of us is an expert on pony culture. I’ve only been to Kludgetown, and you’ve never even been across the border.”

“You don’t have to be rude about it, Waterbug,” Flake complained.

“Actually…” the one now identified as Waterbug paused for a moment. “Yes. Yes I do have to be rude. I have a huge backlog of snark to get through, and I’m falling behind on my quota every day.”

“Really? That’s a thing?”

“Calamity assigned you to me as punishment, didn’t she?”

“She did?” Flake asked, her voice beginning to fade as the pair began to wander out of earshot once again. “Nothing we’ve been told to do has been particularly onerous…”

Moonbeam wasn’t even sure if either of them knew that they had passed close enough for her to hear them so clearly, as neither of them had passed through the chamber she was waiting in. Her attention was then drawn back to the talismans as they began to vibrate and make a sort of glingle-ingle-ingle sound.

“Ah, that will most likely be our Queen.”

“GAH!” Moonbeam cried out in alarm at Captain Mayhem’s announcement. “Sorry! Sorry! I sort of forgot that you were there…” Oh, this was sooooooooo embarrassing!

Saying nothing, Mayhem simply tapped on each of the talismans once, then sat back as an image of what Moonbeam presumed to be their queen’s head and withers was projected into the air above them. Unlike the captain or any of the other changelings she had seen thus far, their queen was a bit closer to a pony in appearance, with a long, teal mane, somewhat normal(ish) green eyes, and a much longer (and very twisted) horn. She was actually almost hauntingly beautiful, albeit in a manner that was both exotic and disturbing.

“Captain Mayhem,” the image spoke briefly.

“My Queen,” the changeling actually present replied with a bow of her head.

“And you must be Moonbeam,” the changeling queen spoke again.

“Ah... yes! That’s me, your majesty!” Moonbeam desperately tried to remember if she was supposed to bow to foreign royalty.

“I am Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe, Sovereign Ruler of Gandahar. You may address me either as ‘your Majesty’ or Queen Whatevra if you do not feel like using my full name.”

“My Queen!” Captain Mayhem sounded scandalized.

“Captain, unless and until Moonbeam emigrates and becomes a citizen of Gandahar, she’s not one of my subjects. Different rules apply.”

“Acknowledged, my Queen,” Captain Mayhem begrudgingly conceded.

Turning her attention back to Moonbeam, Queen Whatevra continued. “Now, what brings a pony into the Umbradepths?”

“Umbradepths, your Majesty?”

“That’s the name of the extensive cavern system beneath Gandahar. They go pretty deep and extend quite a ways in all directions, even past our borders in some locations.”

“Well, I was following an interesting magic signature I detected while I was passing through Weedville.”

“Weedville?”

“Weedville is a small pony community near our border, my Queen.”

“Thank you, Captain. Please continue, Moonbeam. You said that you were following a magical signature?”

“Yes.”

“And it led you into the caverns under Gandahar.”

“Well... sort of? I lost the trail whenever I passed into the Badlands itself, but kept picking it up again once I returned to Equestria. Then I managed to follow the signature into this cavern system, but I still lose it as I pass through certain areas.”

“At a guess, I’d expect that this occurs whenever the tunnels you are passing through rise high enough to fall within the Shield of Gandahar.”

“Shield of Gandahar?” Moonbeam asked, having never heard of it before.

“It’s the anti-magic field that covers all of Gandahar.”

“Oh! That!” Moonbeam exclaimed. “I guess it doesn’t penetrate too deep underground then?”

“Think of the underground portion of the field more like a shallow dish or bowl, as opposed to the dome it is aboveground. It goes deep enough, but becomes more shallow near the edges of our domain.”

“So the anti-magic effect doesn’t propagate as well through dense mediums,” Moonbeam reasoned.

“That is correct,” the changeling queen confirmed. Granted, if it penetrated as far into the ground as the changelings implied, then Moonbeam supposed that the material had to be really thick as well to hinder the effect. Strong walls, even an entire city’s worth of such walls, probably wouldn’t be enough to do so.

Moonbeam blushed as she realized that the changeling queen was just looking at her. And Captain Mayhem seemed agitated, but Moonbeam couldn’t tell if this was directed at her or the queen. “Ah…”

And now the queen looked amused. Great. Moonbeam was making such a wonderful first impression. For her next trick, she was going to step on the tail of some foreign diplomat from Abyssinia or Zebrabe or something!

“Relax,” the queen instructed. “Draw in a deep breath and release it slowly. Repeat this a few times if needed. It should help you release your anxiety and regain your focus.”

This advice did, in fact, seem to help, and Moonbeam felt a lot better by her third repetition.

“Okay, now that you have gathered yourself, let’s talk,” Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe began again. “Given that you are travelling alone, and have left Equestria in pursuit of a magical signature that has caught your attention, I take it that you are either an adventurer, a scholar of magic, or possibly both?”

“Um… I’ve studied magic at Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns,” Moonbeam admitted. “Class of nine seventy-eight, and currently a journey mage pursuing independent studies…”

“Scholar then, with perhaps a dash of adventurer,” the queen concluded. “Tell me, Moonbeam, would you be interested in a collaboration?”

“What do you mean?” Moonbeam asked. Sure, it sounded innocuous enough, but she had never even heard of changelings prior to this day, and even as friendly as they seemed to be, the Bug Ponies were a bit unsettling so it wasn’t too hard to imagine that they might be villains. Okay, that might be a bit speciesist on her part, and it wasn’t as if she actually had any other friends to compare them against.

“Captain Mayhem’s unit is currently on an expedition to investigate whether or not an ancient enemy of ours continues to exist somewhere in the Umbradepths, and if so, what has been keeping them at bay for nearly a thousand years,” the queen explained. “You, on the other hoof, are tracking down an unknown magical signature that may or may not be related, as you could be sensing a seal or similar effect that might be responsible for the reprieve from predation we’ve been experiencing. I propose that we join forces for the time being and help each other.”

“Er… What ancient enemies?” Moonbeam hesitantly asked, hoping that it wasn’t marelocks.

“Giant cave spiders,” the queen stated, holding her forehooves apart before her. “At least bigger than this, and capable of taking down an unwary adult changeling and dragging them off.”

Moonbean felt faint, and she could feel one of her eyes twitching badly. The giant worm-thing was bad enough, but she had possibly been down here with giant pony-eating spiders!? “I think I’d like to accept your offer, Your Majesty!” she managed to squeak out.

*O o O o O*

“I think that went rather well!” Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe commented to herself after breaking the connection.

Okay, Captain Mayhem was a bit irritated with her for mentioning the Shield of Gandahar, if the captain’s glare and frantic gesturing while Moonbeam was lost in thought meant anything, but things were otherwise looking up. And while she still couldn’t shake the feeling that she remembered Moonbeam from somewhere, especially after seeing her, she was now pretty sure that the mare was probably just one of the named extras that one or more of the Mane Six ended up helping out in one episode or another.

With that niggling uncertainty taken care of, Whatevra went back to going over the spy reports. Later she would continue her efforts to preselect candidates for a potential future diplomatic corps, followed by once again checking on Meta Knight to make sure that he wasn’t traumatizing the next batch of general soldiers too badly.

After all, even if there weren’t giant spiders down below, Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe was well aware of the fact that there were other powerful enemies above ground regardless.

But really, the giant spiders had to go. She was barely warming up to Mr. Wriggly as it was, and the thought of even larger spiders living under her hooves wasn’t something she was willing to ignore until she knew for sure one way or the other.

Chapter 10

“So, what am I looking at here?” Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe prompted, as she resisted the urge to poke at the crystals and rocks on display before her.

“These are various types of self-levitating minerals, my Queen,” Honeydew explained excitedly. “This one is referred to as skystone, this one as loftstone, these are cloudstone and cloud crystals respectively, this is stratite, and this is… Oh dear. BEAKER! YOU LEFT YOUR LUNCH ON THE TRAY AGAIN!”

Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe blinked, then looked up. Sure enough, Honeydew’s assistant was floating around near the ceiling of the cavernous laboratory, tumbling through the air as if he were weightless.

“Self-levitating, you say.”

“Yes, my Queen. Normally these minerals are naturally buoyant in the air and will drift around with the wind, although some formations will hold a static position in the sky.”

“I notice that, other than the sample your assistant apparently ate, none of these are floating.”

“Oh, that’s the fascinating bit, my Queen! Apparently the self-levitation is a naturally occurring form of expressed magic! Which, as you should know, the anti-magic properties of your throne automatically absorb unless they originate from a changeling. However, with even just a little infusion of changeling magic, any one of these mineral samples will levitate for hours at a time! Think of the possibilities! We could design our airships to do without those pesky envelopes!”

“And yet Equestria continues to use envelopes for their airships, despite the fact that a third of their population could easily gain access to these rocks.”

“My Queen, I feel that I should point out that some of these minerals were extracted from Equestrian airships.”

“Which, no doubt, also had envelopes.”

“Well… Yes, my Queen.” Honeydew admitted.

“And where did the samples that were not previously part of an airship come from?”

“Oh, that’s easy, my Queen! There’s an area not too far from here to the west where floating islands fall after drifting into the Badlands from over the Macintosh Hills! It’s been very convenient to gather samples to study since the islands tend to break apart on hitting the ground!”

“Honeydew.”

“Yes, my Queen?”

“You may test small craft outfitted with these minerals, but our primary airships will be designed to be fully supported by envelopes whether or not you succeed in designing or replicating a system that can work without an envelope. One will serve as the back-up to the other.”

“As you command, my Queen,” Honeydew conceded, trying not to sound disappointed. Well, at least she got the go-ahead to make small craft without those pesky ropes and envelopes that Beaker kept getting tangled up in. She supposed that would have to do.

*O o O o O*

Moonbeam found that she was actually starting to get used to the bug-pony appearance of the changelings, and was even beginning to be able to tell some of them apart as the days went by. Not that she knew more than a few of their names, as Captain Mayhem’s company was just a bit too large for her to have memorised them all just yet, but they had a mix of the professionalism she expected soldiers to have and the casual comradery (and occasional interpersonal hazing) she had seen among various cliques back at Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns.

And, unlike those cliques, the changelings were apparently willing to push a bit further past her shyness to include her in whatever they were doing.

“No, Flake, that particular type of cave lichen isn’t edible,” Waterbug sighed in exasperation as Flake started scraping some of the glowing green substance off of the walls.”

“But ponies eat this stuff,” Flake responded, “I heard Vertex and Frons talking about it back at the hive.”

“It’s a mildly toxic hallucinogen with little nutritional value. If we feed this to Moonbeam, she’s going to be tripping for days and end up hungrier than before she ate it. We need to gather the more stringy lichen.”

“Are you sure? It doesn’t glow nearly as much, and at least the stuff I’ve been gathering is green. Ponies eat green.”

“Argh… Hey, Moonbeam, you do have at least some survival skills right? Either knowledge or spells that help you determine what is safe for you to eat?”

“Ah, yes?” Moonbeam replied. “I mean, yes, I do. On both counts. Both knowledge and spells.” She appreciated that the changelings were helping her gather more food for herself, but she kind of hoped that the other groups that were also doing so were more like Waterbug than Flake, as Waterbug was at least keeping the fact that she was a pony and not a changeling in mind. She wasn’t sure what changelings ate, and given their prominent fangs, she wasn’t sure that she wanted to know. Not that ponies couldn’t eat meat, far from it, but few chose to do so, and even then it tended to be more because of health reasons due to either living or working in high altitude conditions where the air was naturally harder to breathe.

Her diet back when she was attending Princess Celestia’s School for Gifted Unicorns had included far more fish, poultry, and squirrel than she was strictly comfortable with. Give her a lowland diet any day, with plenty of grains, fruits, veggies, and maybe the occasional serving of pork, ham, or bacon. Because at least pigs weren’t cute! Oh those poor campus squirrels...

“So which of these lichen are safe for you to eat?”

“I bet it’s the green ones!” Flake interjected. “They have a nice healthy glow!”

“Actually, Waterbug is right about those,” Moonbeam pointed out, then hastily spoke up again as Flake deflated. “Although they do have some medicinal uses! I just wouldn’t want to eat any of it unless I needed to, and even then only in very small amounts,” she elaborated while holding her forehooves so close together in front of her as to almost be touching.

“Oh,” Flake shook off his despondency, dumped his bucket, and then started scraping the stringy lichen into it.

Only to have Waterbug knock the bucket out of his hooves.

“Dumb-ass! Clean the bucket and your hooves first!”

Moonbeam shook her head and went back to examining the various lichen, using her magic to pluck the types she knew were edible and placing them in her saddlebag for later. Sure, it might not be much social interaction, but it was still more than she had back in Equestria, and overall she was just happy to be included in even this much.

“AAHHH! DON’T LICK THEM CLEAN, YOU IDIOT!”

Moonbeam and Waterbug dropped everything and grabbed Flake in their magic, galloping as fast as they dared all the way back to the main base camp.

“Wheeeeeee!”

Moonbeam wasn’t certain whether or not Waterbug was going to murder Flake after this, but she was going to very politely suggest to the captain that the two be separated for a while...

*O o O o O*

Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe felt a small surge of pride as she observed the testing of the very first airship constructed completely by and for changelings. Sure, the undercarriage was more of a dinghy, the propellers were hoof operated, there were no sails, and no place to install any sort of magically self-levitating rock, but it was all theirs from start to finish. All in superlight black resin shaped into a vague bug-like form, slung under a green silk envelope that was doing its job adequately, and crewed by three changelings who at least seemed to know what they were doing.

It was probably a plus that Beaker was still drifting around weightlessly back in the lab the magic rocks were in.

“This is wonderful, my Queen!” Honeydew exclaimed, ecstatic that the latest test was going flawlessly while her Queen was here to see it. The first few test flights hadn’t done so well. Nothing serious, just some minor incidents and maybe a crash or two, but after a few adjustments and changing up the participants for some who had actually served on forgein airships before, many of these issues seemed to have been resolved.

“Who designed the aesthetic?” Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe asked as the tiny airship was put through its paces.

“That would be Elytra, my Queen. She has been working with Tarsal, who has become very familiar with the superstructure of various airships we have available.”

“I see.”

“Er… Do you disapprove, my Queen? I could have Elytra transferred to a different project...”

“No, leave her in place. I wish to see where she is going with this style. She, and any other changeling who wishes to add stylistic flair to any proof of concept designs may do so, as long as the final result remains functional and competitive.”

“Competitive, my Queen?”

“I’ll have someling bring you a rundown of airship types and functions. If we are going to explore this field, I want us to do well. I…” Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe blinked and tilted her head as she returned her full attention to the test. “Did the test ship just vanish?”

“Aha! I see they got the stealth system to work! Good! Good!”

“Very impressive. What method are you using?”

“I believe that this attempt involves inducing a pigmentation shift in the silk and resin. As you can see, or perhaps not see, it is surprisingly effective for such a low magic method. It helps when most of the materials involved are produced by changelings.”

“Very nice. I approve.” Whatevra finally caught sight of the camouflaged airship, almost invisible against the same color sky. Not perfect, and she was sure that some pegasi and griffons would be able to spot this method with greater ease, but the idea had merit even if the advantage wasn’t absolute.

And then the tiny airship reverted to full visibility and started to drift.

“Oh dear,” Honeydew observed, “it appears that the crew exhausted themselves maintaining the effect.”

“Honeydew.”

“Yes, my Queen?”

“A stealth system shouldn’t have a detrimental effect on the health of the crew. Or passengers. Fix it.”

“Yes, my Queen!”

*O o O o O*

Moth and Gypsie looked up as Waterbug and the pony, Moonbeam, rushed into the camp’s medical station carrying Flake between them in their magic. Flake, for his part, was drooling and radiating awe and excitement in equal measure. “What did Flake do now?” Moth asked as the two set Flake on the cot.

“He licked some mildly toxic hallucinogenic cave lichen,” Waterbug reported.

“It was green and glowy and tasted like plaid!” Flake added with enthusiasm as he stared vaguely in Moth’s general direction.

“How much did he lick?” Gypsie asked as she and Moth started examining their patient.

“At least five times the recommended safe dose mentioned in the Equestrian Field Medicine Journal,” Moonbeam stated. “At least for a standard poniform of his approximate mass. I don’t know if any of that applies to changelings.”

“Gypsie, break out the medical gel, we’re going to do an emergency flood and purge. Waterbug, take Moonbeam and report to Captain Mayhem. Flake, get back down and stay put, or Gypsie and I will bucking tie you to that cot!”

“Ooh, kinky!”

“Flake, I know for a fact that you don’t even know what that means,” Moth retorted.

“Sure I do! It means tied up, or bent out of shape, or something like that, right?”

“How about you lay down, get some rest while Gypsie is getting the medical gel, and I’ll tell you… basically never.”

“Okay!”

O o O o O

Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe found Humblebee waiting for her atop the hivespire upon her return to Jasper. Dismissing her escort, she turned her attention to her advisor. “Anything to report, Humblebee?” she asked as she headed inside.

“Yes, my Queen. Captain Mayhem has requested permission to return to the hive for a few days in order to clear up some issues.”

“Anything immediately outstanding that might warrant an early return at this point?” Whatevra asked. The expedition had been going fairly well to date, as far as she knew, and even the impromptu introduction of an actual pony guide into the unit earlier in the week hadn’t prompted Mayhem to ask to return.

“Captain Mayhem mentioned something about acquiring some pony specific supplies if one was going to continue being part of the expedition. Apparently they need to resupply their medical gel as well. On a related note, I believe there was also some mention that it might be a good idea to pod Flake for the safety and sanity of everyling involved.”

“Give the go-ahead. I’ve been wanting to meet Moonbeam anyway, and this is as good an opportunity to do so as any.”

Chapter 11

“According to your file, you have some experience with teaching and tutoring?” Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe asked the changeling currently standing before her for review. One Miss Quiz if going by one of her most commonly used pseudonyms. Which was exactly what Queen Whatevra was going to do as she had yet to figure out how to pronounce the changeling name written in her file, and didn’t feel like asking.

“I have performed such duties while in the hive and while abroad during infiltrations, my Queen.”

“Good. Go see Bookworm to have your Miss Quiz identity refined, then I want you to insert yourself as either a tutor or teacher in…” Whatevra pretended to think about it for a moment or two before continuing. “Sire Hollow, in Equestria. While you are there, I would like you to introduce the concept of pen pals and staying in touch with one’s friends even if they move away to the students.”

“My Queen?”

“It is to our benefit if ponies are able to develop and maintain stronger friendships. Friendship is a form of love after all. And I would like to see if this experiment pans out the way I expect that it might.”

“I see, my Queen. I will not fail!”

“You may go,” Queen Whatevra dismissed Miss Quiz.

That should nip the events that would otherwise lead Starlight Glimmer into a lonely spiral of despair and a potential time war in the bud before it even becomes a possibility! Well, hopefully anyway. Queen Whatevra wasn’t sure exactly how old Starlight Glimmer had been compared to the Mane Six, nor what any of their ages currently were (or if any or all of them had even been born yet for that matter).

Still, this was the best shot she could think of for preventing Starlight Glimmer’s time war that didn’t involve either outright killing her or sticking her in a pod for something she hadn’t even done yet. That was a slippery slope that Queen Whatevra wanted to avoid as much as possible when she could.

Now, what other changelings currently available in the hive had interesting talents or abilities?

O o O o O

As Queen Whatevra continued going through her predecessor’s personnel files (and marveled at the fact that Queen Chrysalis had bothered with having personnel files maintained), she took note that not all changelings were created equal. Or, perhaps more to the point, there wasn’t a single linear path of progression from newbie to experienced that all changelings followed. Nor, for that matter, did they all share the same abilities with the basic power sets that they technically all shared as Changlings.

Just as her memories of the show had shown that ponies could vary greatly within their various tribe’s signature ability sets, so too did the changelings. Some were more powerful or talented with telekinesis and/or magic, almost just like unicorns in this respect, although the percentage of high power generalist casters was much lower in comparison, nor did changelings have as many high power specialists. Very few changelings could hope to match the fastest pegasi in the air, and the one saving grace of the lackluster peak of the best changeling attempts at weather control was that they had the ability at all.

Queen Whatevra could sit on a cloud and maybe nudge it about a bit, but thus far all her attempts to make any cloud produce either rain or lightning on demand had accomplished was self-inflicted soaking no matter which way she thought the cloud was actually aimed. A trait she apparently shared with her “mother,” who was equally abysmal with weather manipulation.

On the other hoof, she was satisfied with her general telekinetic abilities, and her magic lessons were coming along nicely. Especially given the age her subjects thought she was (as opposed to the age she remembered being, which might not fare so well in comparison). So far, she had managed to turn a piece of slate hot pink, neon green, dayglow blue, eye searing red, and a sort of off kilter plaid involving all of those colors at once.

Her magic tutor was apparently both proud and appalled at this accomplishment. Even more so in both cases when Whatevera decided to have it framed and hung up in one of the semi-permanent rooms that she was using as an office. Specifically behind and to the left of where she normally sat so that anyone looking in her direction couldn’t help but also see it as well.

Whatevra wasn’t sure where she was going with this little experiment, but so far it was serving as a useful filter separating those who could stay on task from those who ended up staring at it whenever they happened to be in the room.

“Leaving aside the terrible color composition (even though I really don’t want to), you may want to work on your pattern alignment. Some of the lines are crooked or of irregular thickness, and I’m not positive, but I think there may be a subtle underpatern of a heart. Or maybe an elephant.”

Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabi blinked, looked at the slate behind her, then back at the file of the changeling before her. Nope. Nothing at all about any artistic ability or talent with design. Just a notation that while his pony disguises were fair to decent, he couldn’t change his voice at all and could sing well enough to peel paint off of walls (literally - they had tested!).

“Sour Note, was it?”

“Yes, my Queen?”

“Your new name is Fine Detail. Go see Bookworm to have a profile made for this identity, and then get kitted out for an infiltration mission as a new student at the Manehattan Institute of Fine Arts.”

“Yes, my Queen!”

“One more thing, Fine Detail.”

“Yes, my Queen?”

“You are expressly forbidden from singing in any Equestrian art gallery. I would like to avoid causing an international incident just because you made some canvas blank again.”

“Yes, my Queen.”

As Fine Detail left Queen Whatevra’s impromptu office, she made a few additional notations to the file before putting it away to her left and drawing the next one from the stack on her right.

Looking back at the eyesore she had produced, Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabi could just barely make out what might be a sort of vague outline of what could potentially be a potato hidden in the plaid pattern. Which would have been more impressive if she had been trying for a subtle image at all instead of it just being an accident of chance. Still, it was a new medium and tool set for her, and she had lots of time to get better.

Turning her attention back to her self-assigned task. Another hidden talent discovered (and on its way to blossom into either an artist or an art critic), and so many more to go…

O o O o O

Moonbeam looked around nervously as the Changeling Umbradepths Troop Expedition approached the tall, jagged spire of dark stone that jutted up from the barren ground of the Badlands.

“Welcome to Jasper, or what’s left of it,” Lieutenant Catastrophe informed her. “Queen Whatevra Wa’Nabe has been insistent on us using the proper names for things ever since she reopened the Royal Archives.”

“Lieutenant!” Captain Mayhem admonished her subordinate’s breach of what she felt should be operational protocols. Just one more thing to go over with the young queen about before the expedition set out again. Mayhem didn’t actually care whether the mission itself was frivolous, as it involved valuable training for her and her troops, but if they were going to start involving any outsiders in the mission goals, then she felt that there should be at least some rules for such set up ahead of time.

“Anyway,” Captain Mayhem decided to address a slightly different issue, “until and unless the Queen commands otherwise, Moonbeam, you are to be escorted at all times while you are within Jasper. In part due to security reasons that I will not go into, and in part to prevent you from becoming lost as the internal layout shifts around you. Frost and Flambé will be your designated escorts today. They will keep you out of trouble. Waspinator, Lampyrid, the two of you will escort Flake to Holding.”

“Um… Okay?” Moonbeam acknowledged. She understood, at least in part, that her new friends were ostensibly part of a military force and thus had rules that they had to follow. Pretty much like the guards she occasionally encountered back in Canterlot. It was just that she had so many questions and no idea how to ask them! Or, for that matter, even if she should be asking them at all.

And, with these uncertain thoughts, Moonbeam allowed herself to be led into a hole that had opened up in the base of the HiveSpire of Jasper.

She really really hoped that she wasn’t making a big mistake, while also being dead certain that it was far too late to back out at this point.

Waspinator, for his part, was just looking forward to getting some more target practice in at the range while they were here. Maybe he’d have some free time after Flake was podded…