Author's Note
69 Paragraphs. Nice.
Squids are People Too
Wilbur Soot had seen a huge spike in views ever since his song at Carson’s talent show. He also strangely found an increase of popularity in his dream world, although that was probably just dream logic. At least Luna actually enjoyed it. He had accepted long ago that his dream world was not merely a dream, but a different universe entirely that he just happened to visit whenever he slept. He loved the attention he received from the fillies of the schoolhouse whenever he had a chance to see them and retell his stories from Minecraft, although two certain fillies always regarded him as a blank flank, which he ignored since he was just a visitor, and wouldn’t benefit from what he had learned was a cutie mark. In his dream world, or at least that’s what he called it, he was an average pony with a dark blue coat, a dark brown curly mane and straight tail, and dark brown eyes.
Today was a big day for him. Today would be the first official concert of his squid song, performed in front of the entirety of Ponyville, who he would hate to let down on his first major event in this world.
He was backstage, listening to the low roar of conversation of the hundreds of ponies that came to his concert from around the world, even including griffons, a few yaks, a young dragon, and surprisingly, King Thorax. He took a couple of deep breaths as Luna sat with him, encouraging him.
“You can do it, Wilbur,” Luna said for maybe the hundredth time, although each time it helped calm his nerves. He sat by her, who had leaned onto him to comfort him, which he didn’t mind, while he shut his eyes to focus on calming his erratic nerves.
After that, he opened his eyes and stared into Luna’s with determination.
“I’m ready.”
The crowd started cheering as Wilbur made his way onstage, his ukulele slung over his back, heading to the single stool in the middle of the stage. He was nervous, no doubt about it. His nerves were on end as he sat on the stool and brought out his instrument, still as spotlights came on, settling over him and showing him off to the whole world.
It was eerily silent in this normally loud town. He took one last breath as he started strumming his ukulele, strumming a single note as he started singing ia calm tone.
Back when the trees would never decay
Sugar canes were only used for books
There was only ever one type of tree
Until Notch announced the 1.2
He strummed another note at the end of each sentence, smiling as he watched the crowd listen intently, continuing after a slight pause.
And, suddenly, around the world
Everyone got excited
Squids would be in Minecraft 1.2
The squids are completely useless
Just be glad it's them, not wolves
Spare a thought for the squids
When you build your waterfalls
You drown them, stab them, watch them die
What did they do to you?
Spread the message around the world
Squids are people too (Oh yeah)
Squids are people too
Wilbur smiled triumphantly as he paused for another second, before continuing his beat.
When I started to play Minecraft
Squids had already been introduced
They were boring, slow and really easy to kill
And the loot was, frankly, not that good
But then you have to think about it
Nobody loves them
How must it feel to be so alone?
The squids are completely useless
Just be glad it's them, not wolves
Spare a thought for the squids
When you build your waterfalls
You drown them, stab them, watch them die
What did they do to you?
Spread the message around the world
Squids are people too (Oh yeah)
Squids are people too
The squids know there's someone there who loves them
Spread the message out to the world
Somewhere, deep in the ocean
Some squids congregate on the sea floor
When a Minecrafter comes down to see them
They immediately expect the worst to come
But the stranger starts to give
The squids cakes and porkchops
Suddenly, they don't feel so alone
The squids are completely useless
Just be glad it's them, not wolves
Spare a thought for the squids
When you build your waterfalls
You drown them, stab them, watch them die
What did they do to you? (Yeah, what did they do to you?)
Spread the message around the world
Squids are people too (No, they're not!)
Squids are people too
He finished with a flourish, causing all the attendants of the concert to start stomping the ground as a form of clapping while they cheered louder than a bomb’s explosion, shaking the earth as Wilbur smiled happily at this display. The spotlights shut off as he made his way backstage, tossing his ukulele onto a cushioned chair and flopped onto the adjoining sofa with a sigh of satisfaction, fully intent of falling asleep once the cheering died down.
Luna happily trotted in with a smile as she hummed to the tune of his song. Wilbur chuckled without opening his eyes to look at her.
“Enjoyed it, I assume?” He asked, hearing her sit on the ground beside him, in front of the sofa.
“You did great, Wilbur. I have never seen a greater performance in my life,” Luna praised and laid a hoof on his shoulder.
“Thank you,” He yawned as he heard the cheering fade away. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I'm pretty tired,” I politely inform her, lying on my side to face the backrest of the sofa, and quickly fall asleep.
“Don’t forget; you want them all here by Saturday,” Luna informed him as he fell asleep, casting a strange expression on his face as he woke up on Earth.
In his chair.
Streaming.
“Oh, did I leave the stream on?” Wilbur asked as he watched his chat blow up with yes and omega luls.
He chuckled nervously, running his hand through his curly hair. “What time is it?” He asked rhetorically, turning to read his clock. Which didn’t have numbers on it.
He turned back to his with another nervous chuckle as he looked at the face of his Minecraft character. “Don’t look at me like that.”
