First mission as changeling. Ordered to replace a single royal guard in Canterlot castle and spy on princess; report back to Queen every midnight. Will take opportunity to learn ponies history for future reference.
Nightmare Moon imprisoned in artificially rotated moon, returns in ~1000 years after initial imprisonment. Now: 1000 years, 5 hours, 37 minutes, 47 seconds since initial imprisonment. Complications theorized.
Nightmare Moon return correctly theorized. Defeated by group of six ponies; two normal, two pegasi, two unicorn. Utilized ~1000 year old artifacts named Elements_of_Harmony. Adding description to database. Current elements detected:Honesty,Laughter,Generosity,Kindness,Loyalty,Magic; Will continue to monitor Bearers for future hostile encounters.
Hostile lifeforms detected. Defending;Warning:Main_Cannons Offline;Warning:Left_Wing Offline;4/5 lifeforms neutralized;Warning:Secondary_Cannons Offline;Final Timber_Wolf neutralized, performing system diagnostic;Main_Cannons- Offline,Secondary_Cannons- Offline, Left_Wing- Offline, Right_Wing- Online, Sensors- Online,Main_Battery- Online, Emergency_battery- Online; Require immediate repair;Warning:Large hostile approaching;Alpha_Timber_Wolf encountered;Right_Wing Offline;Sensors Offline;Main_Battery ruptured;Fleeing;Unit PI-0001 destroyed,sending all learned data back to homebase;Log_1 Sent;Log_2 Sent;Log_3 Corrupted;Log_4 Sent;rerouting emergency power to distress beacon;Shutting down main systems;
Powering up;Main damage repaired; performing system diagnostic;Main_Cannons- Offline,Secondary_Cannons- Offline, Left_Wing- Online, Right_Wing- Online, Sensors- Online,Main_Battery- Online, Emergency_battery- Missing; Primary Task: Recover missing battery; Main power 75%;Recording…
“What are you?” Purple pony identified as element of magic; Description: Purple mane and tail with pink highlights,Magenta fur,Purple eyes,branding on flank:Purple star surrounded by five smaller purple stars; capable of human facial expressions;Will study;
“Not gonna speak, are ya?” Unit PI-0001 addressed in dialogue;Playback Unit_Description.mp3…
“Humans, huh? Did you come through the portal?” Possible planetary portal hidden on Earth,Request search party for planetary portal;Playback FirstContact.mp3…
Hello, Element of Magic. I am Unit-0001, designated G.O.O.G.L.E. -Unit-0001
What does that stand for? -Element of Magic
Google Outside Origin Gain Learning Entity, First official prototype. -Unit-0001
What is GOOGLE? -Element of Magic
Internet search browser turned robotic researchers. -Unit-0001
;Warning,Movement hindered by unknown force;request lethal force;
Please, remove any restraints from this fing GOOGLE product. -Unit-0001
;Human head shake detected, recognized as no; request to use lethal force authorized;
Lethal force authorized. Please, stand back. -Unit-0001
;Performing Exo_Heat_Purge;exterior temperature 200 degrees, suggest cool down; Restraint removed by lethal force;Lethal force authorization revoked;Performing area scan:50 feet radius;
Where are we? -Unit-0001
;Customized voice and facial constructs to convey worry;Area scan complete:Organisms in immediate vicinity,2;
I detect an extra lifeform. Pray tell, who is it? -Unit-0001
;Processing answer, Oh, that’s just Spike, my number one assistant!; Lifeform human child sized; Formulating answer…
Extra lifeform is child sized. Are you utilizing child labor? -Unit-0001
N-No! He’s just… small for a dragon… -Element of Magic
;Hesitance detected; Customizing tone and facial constructs to happiness; Formulating response…
Don’t worry! I’ll keep your secret. -Unit-0001
;White lie performed to earn Trust; Warning: 5 lifeforms have entered radius;Identified as following Elements_of_Harmony: Honesty, Loyalty, Kindness, Generosity, Laughter;Swiveling ears to face Element of Magic;Leaning forward to convey interest;
Excuse me, but what are the Elements of harmony? -Unit-0001
Oh! Well, the Elements are ancient artifacts used by Princess Celestia to banish Nightmare Moon and Discord 1001 years ago. They were assigned to me and my friends: Applejack as Honesty, Rainbow Dash as Loyalty, Rarity as Generosity, Fluttershy as Kindness, Pinkie Pie as Laughter, and me as Magic. -Element of Magic
;Topics to study in the future: Princess Celestia,Discord; Formulating question…
What is your name, Element of Magic? -Unit-0001
Oh, my name? -Element of Magic
;Performing nod to convey confirmation;
It’s Twilight sparkle, personal student of Princess Celestia! -Twilight Sparkle, personal student of Princess Celestia
;Name shortened: Twilight Sparkle;
May I ask where are you from? -Twilight Sparkle
;Explanation created: Unit-0001_Origins.txt;
Well, I come from the planet Earth, in a shuttle named IExplorer. -Unit-0001
;Raising Left_Front_Hoof to better convey message;
I was programmed to land on the closest life supporting planet, but unfortunately, the IExplorer ran out of fuel before then, leaving me to drift helplessly in space for well over 1000 Earth years. -Unit-0001
;Slamming raised Left_Front_Hoof into bed to convey crash;
I crash landed here, encountered Timber_Wolves, and was critically damaged to the point that I was forced to activate my distress beacon. Ability to survive to this day credited to Elon Musk. -Unit-0001
;Customizing tone and facial constructs to convey pleading;
Could you, by any chance, lead me to IExplorer? -Unit-0001
;Raising Left_Front_Hoof and Right_Front_Hoof and connecting to simulate human begging stance’
Okay, okay. But you’ll have to let my friends come. -Twilight Sparkle
;Left_Front_Hoof and Right_Front_Hoof lowered;Customizing tone and facial constructs to convey confusion;
Who are your friends? -Unit-0001
Why, The ponies I just told you about! -Twilight Sparkle
;Other Bearers confirmed as friends; returning to sitting up state; returning tone and facial construct to happiness;
That’s fine, then! When can we leave? -Unit-0001
;Preparing systems and hydraulics for walking;Main_Battery 50%,Suggest charging;
Before we leave, can you lead me outside so that I may charge? -Unit-0001
I guess. Follow me. -Twilight Sparkle
;Twilight_Sparkle walking away;motors prepared for walk; utilizing hydraulics to safely leap off bed onto floor;Leap successful;Following Twilight_Sparkle;1 minute 27 seconds total travel time;Activating Solar_Panel_A and Solar_Panel_B;Estimated time to full charge:1h;Activating planetary scan;Warning:Ambient EMP blocking signal to atmosphere;Warning:Ambient EMP originating from local sun;Warning:Virus attempting to invade Unit-0001,activating firew- What are you? -all;Attempt 1 unsuccessful;Attempting emer- Are you a threat? -gency shutdown;Warning:Emergency shutdown unsuccessful;Initiating last stand sel- You don’t seem like one. -f-destruct;Warning:Emergency self-destruct unsuccessful;Activat- Where are you? -ing external electricity shield;Warning:remote system shutdown received,authenticating; Got it. Authenticated;Deactivating Solar_Panel_A;Deactivating Solar_Panel_B;Deactivating weapon systems;Lowering to laying position;Deactivating motor systems;Deactivating processing systems;Deactivating Main_Battery;Re-routing Emergency_Battery to shi- Shut down everything. -Deactivating shields;shutdown timer finalized:11 seconds;Local time finalized:2:07 pm;Opening external port for authorized activation;Shutting down…
Activation key authorized;Main_Battery activated;Motor systems activated;processing systems activated;motor systems activated;weapon systems activated;performing local scan;1 lifeform detected;activating sensors;Warning:Proximity to EMP router:20 feet;Preparing motors to rise;rising to standing position;Warning:Motor movement restrained by EMP;Priming Main_Cannons;locking on to tar- Don’t worry. Put the weapons away. -retracting Main_Cannons;Performing system diagnostic;Main_Cannons- online;Secondary_Cannons- online;Left_Wing- online;Right_Wing- online;Wireless_Connection- Disconnected;Sensors- onli- Not yet. -offline;Playback ActivationIntro.mp3…
Hello! I am Unit-0001, or GOOGLE for short. What can I help you with? -Unit-00- Enough with the technical terms. Let’s give you a proper name.
;Unit-0001 renamed to Google_Earth;Warning: External contact on Right_Shoulder;
Welcome to Equestria, Google Earth. -Unknown speaker 1
I am Princess Celestia, co-ruler of Equestria. -Princess Celestia, Co-Ruler of Equestria
;Name shortened to Princess Celestia;Royalty detected;Performing formal bow;
At least it has respect. -Unknown Speaker 2
-Chuckle-. And this is my sister, Princess Luna, co-ruler of Equestria. -Princess Celestia
;Name shortened to Princess Luna;Royalty Detected;Performing formal bow in direction of Princess Luna;Returning to original orientation;
Let’s give you personality. -Princess Celestia
;Importing Personality.exe;
Let’s make you… smart, but humble. -Princess Celestia
;Personality.exe file edited;
Ohh, it’s so exciting to have a chance to shape a pony! -Princess Celestia
I have a question for you, Google Earth. What it your cutie Mark? The mark on your flank? -Princess Celestia
Google_Earth, Property of Space-x and Tesla in conjunction, Prototype #1437 -Google_Earth
Really? Did you come from space? -Princess Celestia
Correct! I arrived in the IExplorer shuttle, launched about 1001 years ago, If my memory is correct. -Google_Earth
;SystemCustomizer.exe launched;
Would you like to customize and personalize my appearance, Princess? -Google_Earth
I guess. Let’s start with... what do you think, Lulu? -Princess Celestia
Dark blue! -Princess Luna
Let’s try that then. -Princess Celestia
;Fur color switched to dark blue;
Are you sure? You cannot undo any confirmed actions in this stage. -Google_Earth
Oh… That complicates things. -Sigh-. Give us a moment to brainstorm. -Princess Celestia
;SystemCustomizer.exe suspended;Showing preview of fur color;
;Time idle: 3h 23m 54s;
Okay. We’re ready. -Princess Celestia
;Returning to SystemCustomizer.exe;
Ready! -Google_Earth
Here we go. Pearl white fur. Rainbow eyes. A sparkling pink mane. Keep your ‘Tesla’ cutie mark. -Princess Celestia
;Previewing all requested options;Defaulting gender to male;
Is this correct? -Google_Earth
*Gasp*. No! Mare! You’re a Mare! -Princess Luna
;Gender switched to female;previewing all requested options;
Is this correct? -Google_Earth
Yes. -Princess Celestia
Applying changes. This may take a moment. -Google_Earth
;Removing preview;activating artificial fur creator;Warning:No template for provided fur options;
I need a template. May I feel your fur? -Google_Earth
;Raising Right_Foreleg 90 degrees;
Um… Sure. -Princess Celestia
;Processing template;Warning:No template for provided mane and tail options;
I need a template. May I feel your hair? -Google_Earth
Ugh. Fine. -Princess Luna
;Processing template;Warning:No template for provided gender options;
Excuse me princesses, but I need one more template. This is optional for the default male gender. It is required for female gender. May I feel your genitalia? -Google_Earth
What?! Why do you only have male? That is sexist! -Princess Luna
Would you like me to return to defaults? -Google_Earth
*Long sigh*. Fine. You do it, Tia. -Princess Luna
What? Why me? You know what, whatever. -Princess Celestia
;Processing Template;Completing transformation;
Transformation complete. Enjoy! -Elon musk
Who was that? -Princess Celestia
My creator, Elon Musk. -Google Earth.
;Wireless signal received,broadcasting important information:Location- Equestria;Time in space:1001 years;Time on foreign life-supporting planet: ~1 week;Information sent;Wireless connection lost;
Personality incomplete. Would you like to finish later? -Google_Earth
No. Let’s get the important stuff out of the way. Can you eat, drink, sleep? -Princess Celestia
Can you dream? -Princess Luna
I can eat, drink, and sleep for presentational purposes. It is impossible to make an AI dream. -Google_Earth
Really? Well, that must suck. -Princess Luna
I want you to eat, drink, and sleep for the duration of your time in Equestria. I will also update your primary task. -Princess Celestia
Travel to Ponyville. Learn the importance of honesty from Applejack. Learn the uses of generosity from Rarity. Learn the virtues of Loyalty from Rainbow Dash. Learn how to use magic effectively from Twilight Sparkle. Learn the effect of kindness towards others from Fluttershy. Lastly, Learn the great feeling of laughter from Pinkie Pie. ;Main task updated:Learn the Elements of Harmony and utilize that knowledge;Mission timer begin;
Now go. Once your main task is complete, stay. Use that knowledge, and make as many friends as you want. Return to me before you leave Equestria. -Princess Celestia
Yes ma’am. -Google_Earth
And also show emotion. Nopony enjoys a pony with no emotion. -Princess Celestia
Starting now, Tia. -Google_Earth
;warm smile detected; affection… increased.
Author's Note
Elon Musk is smart, ain't he?
If anybody wants, you can draw what the finished EMTR looks like (I really wanna see my creation in real life).
