Nightmare in a Dream World
Chapter 1
The hammer on the alarm clock started to swing wildly back and forth. Shortfuse Skydancer opened her eyes and sat up in bed, looking over at the mechanical alarm clock and sighed as the key for the alarm unwound all the way, and the ringing died.
The alarm clock was the product of a bygone era, but that was why Shortfuse liked it. The clock was a link to the past, to a time when life was not so complicated. She found it reassuring in a strange way.
She turned the clock around and rewound the key, before sliding out of bed, and letting out a yawn.
I feel like a sack of bricks was dropped onto my head. She thought to herself as she walked into her washroom and reached out with a wing to turn on the shower, letting the water heat up to a point where it was almost scalding. She glanced into the mirror, the mare who looked back at her looked like hammered shit.
That’s it, no more drinking, she promised herself for the umpteenth time. She was a cyan coated pegasus mare with a messy verdant green and purple mane. No matter what she tried to do with it, she always ended up with it looking like bed head, so she just stopped bothering.
The water had warmed up, and she stepped in to get cleaned up. She scrubbed herself clean and stepped out, grabbing a towel and drying off. She went back into her bedroom and grabbed the micro information processor from it’s charging cradle from the bedside table and snapped the minicomputer onto her foreleg and pulled up the calendar, the holographic display jumped to life and gave her the date. Thursday, 8th of July, Year 100 of the Republic.
Wait. No, that can’t be right. Shortfuse thought to herself as she stared blankly at the display. It was her birthday. It couldn’t be, she could have sworn that she’d already celebrated her birthday. Had she not gone to a club?
She was sure of it now. She had taken her best friend in the world, Sparky Starlight out to a dance club. Sparky had gotten blackout drunk after choosing the wrong drink. Sparky, being the teetotaller that she was, had been suckered into drinking the most potent drink known to pony kind and passed out immediately.
Shortfuse smiled, that had been a good memory. She opened the settings menu and toggled aeroplane mode on, and then off. Usually, that would fix things like this, surely, its link with the time server was out of whack.
It did not fix it.
Shortfuse was alarmed by this. She darted out of her bedroom and headed down the stairs and turned on the television in her living room, the news showed that the date was the 8th of July, Year 100 of the Republic as well.
No, no that was wrong, she knew it had to be incorrect. There was something she was missing.
She jumped in surprise as a knock came from the door. She turned her head and trotted over to the door, biting her lip as she opened it.
On her doorstep was a white-coated Pegasus mare with a straw yellow mane, that was a huge tangled mess, with a tail to match. She had purple eyes that sparkled with a childlike wonder. The mare offered her the biggest grin that Shortfuse had ever seen. ‘Hi!’ she said and trotted inside, immediately going into the kitchen and opening the refrigerator.
‘Uh, Hi?’ Shortfuse said, more confused by this development than anything else. ‘Um, excuse me, not to be rude or anything, but who are you?’ she asked.
‘Oh! I’m Surprise!’ she said with a grin that was somehow even bigger. She turned and stuck her head in the refrigerator and pulled out two cans of orange soda, she examined them for a few moments before nodding her head in approval, then set them on the kitchen counter. She bumped the door with her flank to close it and opened a cabinet and pulled out two glass cups. Surprise set the cups down, and leaned down and opened the cans with her teeth and poured them out into the glasses with what was clearly a practised hoof. She waived Shortfuse over and passed one of the drinks to her, and picked up the other for herself and held it up as if to toast their meeting. Shortfuse was too stunned by the fact that this strange mare had just barged into her house and served her a soda to take a drink.
Surprise downed her soda in one go and let out a sigh of contentment, setting the glass down on the counter while smacking her lips. ‘Ahh, that was nice. Who loves orange soda? I do, I do, I do!’ she said.
Shortfuse bit her lip and shook her head. Surprise motioned for her to take a drink. Shortfuse sighed and lifted the glass to her lips and took a sip. She was surprised to discover that the orange soda seemed to have a calming effect on her. ‘Who are you?’ she asked again.
‘I told you! I’m Surprise!’ Surprise said with a bright grin that somehow seemed to outstrip the rest.
‘Yes, but who are you?’ Shortfuse asked again. She was starting to get annoyed.
‘Ohh, I see, I know what you’re getting at now,’ she said with a nod. ‘I’m an Angel!’ she said brightly.
‘Right,’ Shortfuse said with a sigh. ‘The Angel of what? Goofiness?’
Surprise looked amused by this and let out a giggle. ‘What? No silly, there’s no Angel of Goofiness, but I do have to admit, if there was, I would probably be the best candidate,’ she said and waved for Shortfuse to follower her back into the living room, where she flopped onto the sofa and patted for her to sit.
She did so, but her patience was wearing thin. If today was the 8th of July, then today was a working day, and this annoying mare was going to make her late. She took another sip of her drink, hoping that Surprise would get on with it.
‘I’m the Angel of Death!’ Surprise said with a grin so broad, it should not have even been possible.
Shortfuse spat out her drink in Surprise’s face. Surprise didn’t even flinch. ‘W-what?!’ she asked, her face going pale, hoping that she’d misheard.
‘Yep, you died. Particularly nasty way too, rebar through the chest in a spaceship crash, very unique,’ Surprise said with a nod.
Shortfuse stuttered, she certainly felt like she should remember such a thing happening.
‘Don’t remember? Well, that’s okay,’ Surprise said as if she could read her thoughts. ‘It is quite normal; actually, pony minds tend to block out the memories of them dying. Death is a very traumatic event, even to those who go to it willingly,’ she said brightly. ‘I would know, having caused a few myself.’
Shortfuse slowly tried to inch herself away from this mare. She wanted to ask how she could be dead, and yet still be conscious of herself. ‘How—?’ was all she managed to get out.
‘Ponies are strange creatures,’ Surprise said without any hint of irony in her voice. Shortfuse thought though that was the most significant case of dramatic irony she had ever seen with that coming out of her mouth.
‘So, I’m sure you know, unicorns can move things around using telekinesis,’ Surprise said. ‘In the past, ponies called this “magic”, nowadays though they tend to prefer the term “metaphysical ability,”’ she added, making air quote signs with her forehooves.
‘What you probably don’t know though is that Earth Ponies and Pegasi had their own brands of “magic” too. Earth ponies could influence the land, and effortlessly shape it to their will. Most applied this to farming. Pegasi could soar through the sky at unimaginable speeds and stand on clouds as if they were solid ground. Ever since the princesses died, though, these abilities have gotten weaker and weaker. Soon enough, there will come a time when the abilities are gone completely, and there won’t be any practical differences between the three different breeds of ponies,’ Surprise explained. ‘Give it a hundred years or so, maybe.’
Shortfuse sat speechless for a few moments as she struggled to process this. ‘So, how do I come into it if I’m dead?’ she asked.
‘I’m getting there!’ Surprise said. ‘So the metaphysic ability of Earth Ponies and Pegasi are a lot weaker than unicorns, but there’s still some. Sometimes when a pony dies a part of them suddenly gets imprinted on the world, rather than dissipating into nothing. I’ve been charged with helping those who are left behind. To scatter that extra energy to the void by the Tribunal of Ch’a, where the imprints won’t bother the living.’
‘The what?’ Shortfuse asked, blinking in confusion.
‘Not super important to your story,’ Surprise said idly, and then turned to look at the wall and winked, as if she was sharing a joke with someone that only she could see. ‘Suffice to say, they know a lot about the metaphysic, so now I serve them as the Angel of Death. The humans have a saying, “Death rides a pale mare,” but no, Death is a pale mare.’
Shortfuse didn’t know what to say about that. At this point, there was only one logical course of action to her. She stood up, walked over to the front door, opened it, and took off at a gallop.
Surprise shook her head and clicked her tongue disapprovingly. ‘They always try to run,’ she said with a sigh.
Shortfuse knew intellectually that what she was doing was stupid. She was literally trying to run away from Death. She had watched enough horror movies to know how stupid this actually was, but she could not make herself stop. She tore down the streets of the urban metropolis that was Ponyville in Year 100 of the Republic. Other ponies were going about their business, and although she was bobbing and weaving through the throng at breakneck speed. They didn’t seem to notice that she was there.
At least, until she sprinted headlong into someone else, knocking them both to the ground.
‘Hey! What’s that all about!’ the mare cried out. Shortfuse looked down at her and gasped. The mare was a unicorn, with a grey-blue coat, azure mane with a dark streak that reminded her of the sky at midnight.
No one else on the street gave them a second look. That could only mean one thing. This mare was just as dead as Shortfuse was.
‘I’m sorry,’ Shortfuse said and extended a hoof to help her up. ‘I was running from the—the—surely you know.’
‘Ah, yes, that,’ the mare said coolly. ‘Everyone always runs. Every single one.’
Shortfuse couldn’t help but look embarrassed. ‘I’m Shortfuse Skydancer,’ she said, changing the subject. ‘Who are you? What’s your name?’ she asked.
The mare cocked her head to the side and considered for a moment. It felt like an uncomfortably long time before she smiled in a way that Shortfuse wasn’t sure she liked. ‘I’m Starry Night,’ she said and offered her hoof to shake. ‘Stick with me kid. I’ve been here longer than anyone else. I’ll keep you safe.’
Chapter 2
‘The one thing I don’t understand is what exactly is this place?’ Shortfuse asked as she trailed idly behind Starry Night. ‘I mean, this is Panzer Lehr Memorial Drive, in Downtown Central but—’
Starry Night raised a hoof to cut her off. They stopped walking, and she reached out and kicked a passing stallion clad in a business suit who happened to be walking by. Her leg passed through his body, and he didn’t react in the slightest way. She turned her head to look at Shortfuse. ‘Understand?’ she asked.
Shortfuse shook her head.
‘We are a lingering remnant of consciousness, we can see the world, but we can’t interact with it,’ she said simply. ‘If we try, no one will notice. Believe me, oh how I have tried,’ she said and attempted to punch a passing mare in the face. Likewise, the punch went right through, and the mare didn’t respond.
‘It seems a poor way to—continue on,’ Shortfuse said, catching herself before she accidentally used the word “live”.
Starry Night shrugged. ‘Anything to stave off the boredom,’ she said.
Shortfuse opened her mouth to ask just how long it had been since Starry Night’s death when a city bus jumped the kerb and ran right through her. She gasped and jumped in surprise. It took her a moment to remember that she was already dead, it was not like the bus could have killed her again.
She turned her head to watch as the bus collided with a brick wall. The crowded street was full of ponies who gasped or screamed with terror.
Starry Night looked more amused than anything. ‘Oh dear,’ she said ironically. ‘Seems the city bus virtual intelligence pilot had a system failure and crashed. How dreadful.’
‘Do you think anyone is hurt?’ Shortfuse asked, looking around. The bus had not hit any pedestrians, save her, and she did not really count. The passengers might have been rattled around and need medical attention.
‘Who cares?’ Starry Night said, dismissively. ‘It’s not as if we’re in any position to do anything. We can’t interact with the physical world in any way.’
Shortfuse bit her lip, chewing on it for a moment before speaking her thought. ‘I’ve been meaning to ask about that actually. When I woke up this morning, I reached out and put on my MIP and—’
‘You imagined that,’ Starry Night interrupted.
Shortfuse blinked. ‘I turned on the telly in my living room too—’
‘You imagined that as well,’ Starry Night said, a bored look appearing on her face. ‘You are dead. You cannot interact with the physical world, but you can fool yourself into seeing what you want to. Pull up your MIP and think really hard that it is Hearth’s Warming Day,’ she commanded and leaned up against the wall to wait.
Shortfuse thought that was silly, but she did as she was told. When she opened up the clock, the date read as 6th of December, 100 YOR, Hearth’s Warming Day, and Shortfuse could not help but look surprised.
‘See?’ Starry Night asked. ‘You can trick yourself into anything in this state. You can even change the way you look if you try hard enough. Helps keep things from getting dull,’ she said and turned and walked down the street. Shortfuse was about to follow when something odd caught her eye. A motorbike pulled up, sunlight glittered off the bike’s holographic canopy and slowed to a stop. The canopy withdrew, and the bike’s rider slipped off. Shortfuse knew her. It was Anastasia Hopely.
Detective Constable Hopely had been one of the ponies that had gone into space with her. Shortfuse, her best friend Sparky Starlight, Sparky’s Grandmother Vinyl Scratch, the Nephite missionary Dizzy Doo, Hopely, plus the enigmatic Señora Amarilla de la Manzana and her hulking gryphon manservant Juan Carlos, had all been kidnapped by Spetsnaz Troopers of the Unified Praesidium of Socialist Republics and forced to serve as the expendable crew of the Cosmonaut Anatoliy Leninov, which Shortfuse promptly crashed after their return home, resulting in her death.
Shortfuse frowned, she’d always had a nagging feeling that Hopely had some connection to Yuri Tasarov, the mad bastard who had forced them to go on the mission. Shortfuse had been under the impression that he had chosen them to go because of their association with Hopely. It was either that or Yuri Tasarov was just insane for wanting ponies who had skills that only tangentially related at best to operating the ship.
‘What weren’t you telling us Hopely?’ Shortfuse asked, and jumped in alarm when Hopely looked right at her. She cocked her head to the side and frowned. Shortfuse realised that Hopely was just looking through her at the bus behind her.
Hopely flicked her head and pulled up her police computer visor. ‘This is Hopely, I’ve got a bus crash on PLM drive at—Hmm, the intersection of Viscount avenue. Need an ambulance, and a full medic detail. I’m boarding the bus to check on casualties.’ She said and trotted over to the bus and stepped on to it.
Shortfuse followed her, it was pandemonium on the inside of the bus. Many ponies were lying on the floor, clutching themselves. Moans of pain filled the air.
Hopely knelt down next to a filly who was trying to shake her mother awake.
‘Hey, are you alright?’ Hopely asked.
The filly looked up, tears were streaming down her cheeks. ‘She won’t wake up,’ she sobbed.
Hopely frowned and reached over and felt with her fetlock at the mare’s neck to check for a pulse. Her head flopped unnaturally. The mare was a unicorn with a crème coat and orange mane, and her neck was broken. She was dead.
Shortfuse felt like she was going to be sick and dashed off the bus.
The dead mare was standing on the street corner, her eyes wide with terror as she looked around.
Shortfuse walked up to her and bit her lip. ‘I am so sorry,’ she said.
‘What happened? The last thing I remember was—’ she cut herself off. She Screwed up her face, trying to concentrate. It was if she had to struggle to remember what happened.
Shortfuse remembered what Surprise had said. It was not uncommon for the pony mind to block out the memory of its death, especially a traumatic and sudden death as this had been.
‘What’s your name? Do you have any family?’ Shortfuse asked, hoping that maybe she could soften the blow, and hoping that the poor little filly wasn’t now an orphan.
‘Melanie Sherbert,’ she said automatically. ‘I have a husband and a daughter—I was with my daughter, Melantha—’
Hopely stepped off the bus with little Melantha in tow, she was a unicorn too, crème of coat, but jet black in her mane, with bright blue eyes that had turned red from crying.
Melanie cried out and ran over to her, practically diving through her daughter. She let out a cry of terror and looked wildly around.
Shortfuse trotted over to Melanie and put a hoof on her shoulder. ‘I am so sorry,’ she said again.
Melanie hopped to her hooves. She walked backwards in front of Hopely and Melantha, trying to get her daughter’s attention, but the filly looked on without seeing.
‘I don’t understand,’ Melanie said, stopping in her tracks and letting Melantha and Hopely walk through her.
‘You died in the crash,’ Shortfuse said, feeling now that if she tried to sugar coat what had happened, it would only make it worse.
Melanie’s head whipped around, and she looked Shortfuse square in the face. ‘What? But, but if that’s the case—’
‘I’m dead too, I know how this feels, but it’ll be okay,’ she said, trying to be comforting, but this proved to be the wrong thing to say. Melanie’s eyes went wide, a look of abject horror formed on her face, and she slowly backed away from Shortfuse, before turning tail and bolting off after Melantha.
‘They always try to run,’ Shortfuse whispered to herself. ‘Of course, it won’t be okay, the poor mare’s dead, and that filly will be scarred for life—stupid of me—’
Starry Night appeared from around the corner. ‘What are you doing? That freak of nature is sure to show up any moment now! Let’s get going!’ she said, waving for Shortfuse to follow.
Sure that she meant Surprise, Shortfuse began to trot after her. She wanted to be as far away from here as possible when the Angel of Death came calling.
