The Three Failures

by The Truth of Chaos

Rating: everyone
Tags: Discord, Princess Celestia, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Nightmare Moon, Comedy, Queen Chrysalis
Length: 2998

A Nightmare, a Draconequus and a Changeling walk into a room...

Discord, fed up with the treatment he has already been through for a number of millennia, manages to find Nightmare Moon and Queen Chrysalis's dream connections. He decides it's time for revenge, and plans a meeting for a diabolical plan.

Needless to say, they don't work well together when they actually succeed.

Published 2012-09-01 06:14:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-09-01 06:14:02 UTC

Prologue - Meeting

Prologue - Meeting

Discord sat idly, waiting for his guests to arrive. He hated waiting. No, he absolutely loathed it. But this time he would make an exception. After all, waiting for this was going to be a lot shorter than waiting another few millennia until he was released from his stone prison. He tried his best to find something to entertain himself with. Snapping his talons, a purple marshmallow appeared on the short coffee table in front of him. Picking it up in his paw, he began to wave it across the room like a spaceship, making little hums and sounds for special effects.

"Are you honestly playing that marshmallow as if it were a foal's toy spaceship?" A voice beckoned from the darkness. Discord immediately sat upright, and instantly regretted it, pulling a muscle in his neck. He winced in pain, rubbing it with his bear paw.

"Well, waiting isn't one of my strong points. And you know that very well, Queen of the Night." Discord answered, pouting a little towards the black, flowing-maned alicorn. Nightmare Moon rolled her eyes, trotting towards the table, and took a seat on the left side of the square table from Discord's point of view. Her armour was not present, so Discord couldn't help but start few jokes to stay entertained.

"So, ever thought of getting some mane-grower for that balding of yours?" He asked slyly, bringing his head on his bird claw to rest. He giggled at her reaction, Nightmare Moon's face lit up red with anger, but held her breath and took a minute to compose herself. Her misty, magical mane, while very beautiful and graceful, gave her a look of baldness without her helmet. She looked away from Discord, displeased.

"At least I'm not kept as a trophy in the garden of a princess." She replied back, snickering silly. Discord frowned, feeling a little bit of anger boiling up inside him. But he would not let up so easily. If she wants to play the game, she better be in it to win it, he thought.

"Better than having to watch the world go by with somebody else's eyes." He argued.

"Better than having to wait for eons before you can be released and imprisoned once again. But hopefully, if everything goes according to plan, we may just have our petty problems put aside." Nightmare Moon finished, huffing and no longer meeting eye contact with the draconequus.

He shrugged, smirking slightly with half lidded eyes. "So, how was your vacation on the moon?"

"Unbecoming. Just like how you are acting right now." Nightmare growled at him. "Now where's that other guest that you invited?"

"Oh, you mean Queen Chrysalis?" Discord questioned, tilting his head a little.

"Indeed. I try not to remember the names of those below me." The mare spat. Discord gasped, putting a paw to his mouth, his eyes wide.

"Does that mean you actually respect me princess? I'm shocked." He stated. "After all, you remember my name, don't you?"

"Yes, I do have some respect for you, as stupid as it sounds. After all, you did managed to cause that group of meddlesome brats to fight each other instead of you."

"Aye. Sad that my chaotic empire was short lived. Honestly, I swear if Celestia hadn't sent all those letters back to Twilight I would have won!" The spirit of chaos exclaimed rather dramatically.

"Ah yes, Twilight Sparkle..." Nightmare Moon grimaced, her eyebrows arching while she remembered the name. "I should have disposed with her while I had the chance. But my selfish desires of beating the only beings who could stop me got in my way."

"I guess we all hate Sparkle for what she has done to use." Another voice added. Discord and Nightmare Moon turned to the darkness to see a tall, black pony with insectoid wings, a blue unkept mane, and several holes ridden in her form. She two sat down on the comfortable chair surrounding the table, on the opposite side of Nightmare Moon.

"Ah, Queen Chrysalis, we were almost afraid you wouldn't make it." Discord said, snapping his talons as three tea cups filled with chocolate milk appeared on the table, all steaming fresh. Chrysalis stretched, yawning a little.

"Well, unlike you two, I'm not imprisoned in some alter-ego's body or a cliché stone prison." She stated, rubbing her eyes. "I actually need to sleep before I can come here, and when you're hungry, sleeping isn't easy."

Nightmare Moon scuffed, slightly angered by her statement. Turning towards Discord, she deadpanned.

"So, what are we going to discuss again, mister failed chaos lord?" She taunted, hoping it would have some effect. But, Discord simply snickered, bringing a talon to his chin.

"I'm the failed chaos lord? At least my reign didn't last for less than an hour, unlike a certain mare of darkness I know." Discord countered, a now devious grin plastered on his face. He leaned back in his chair, taking the chocolate milk from the table in his paw.

"And also, if it wasn't for that certain mare, none of us would be in this mess. After all, while Chrysalis and I managed to turn them against each other one way or another, you only made their bonds stronger, therefor allowing them to gain the Elements of... Harmony..." He shuddered at the last word. He then yelped as Nightmare Moon whacked his cheek hard with part of her mystical mane. He rubbed his cheek, frowning at the Nightmare.

"You know better than to insult me Discord." Nightmare growled at him, lifting the cup of chocolate milk to her mouth with her magic, taking a sip. "You're lucky I keep you around for this stuff. Best drink I've had in a thousand years."

"You don't get out much, do you?" Chrysalis stated, lifting her cup to drink as well. "But I do agree this is a fine for such a sugar filled drink."

Nightmare Moon groaned, rolling her eyes as she placed her drink down. "Discord, do be a dear and snap some cookies into existence, will you?" Discord was only happy to oblige, blinking his eyes as a plate of warm, chocolate chip cookies appeared on the table.

"So, why don't we get down to business, hmm?" The changeling queen implied, looking to the draconequus and alicorn. They nodded in response, and soon the two mares looked towards the only male in the room.

"Ehem! So, we all know why we are gathered here tonight." He snapped his fingers, throwing three illusions before them.

One was of the statue of Discord, arms outstretched and in terror, standing once again in the garden of Canterlot. Ponies came by to ridicule him and laugh, or shake their heads in disgust. The next was of Princess Luna, continuing with her royal duties and raising the moon, but Nightmare Moon remained by her side the whole time, nopony else able to see her, nopony could hear her, nopony could feel her. She was nothing but a shadow bound to a shell. The last one was of Chrysalis, broken and beat, hiding away in a cold cave, shivering as slept. She looked so hungry her exoskeleton had slightly moved in on her to protect her now fragile body. Each one felt sorrow towards the other two, and felt a huge dent in their pride as they saw themselves.

"We have been tossed aside by the powers of Harmony - or in some cases love - and left to rot." The draconequus spat. "Well, now we must discuss a way to return us to our formal glory. After all, all of us want revenge, right?"

The two mares nodded in agreement, a look on determination on their faces. Discord grinned, and turned to Chrysalis.

"Alright, mighty changeling queen, you are going to be the base of our plan, since you are the only one who has not been made immobile." Discord announced, in which Chrysalis felt great pride. This whole thing was riding in her.

"Now, being the changeling you are, we know you can shapeshifte into any form. This is a huge bonus. What you need to do first is locate the elements. No doubt they would have moved them, after two failed attempts of obtaining them." Discord chuckled as he raised his bear claw for a hoof-bump. Chrysalis soon answered with a hoof of her own, smirking deviously.

"Then, I need you to sneak in and take the elements. No doubt Celestia has them under her protection, but I'm sure a manipulative shapeshifting queen like you can figure something out. Make sure, if you are going to impersonate anyone, you get the personality right. Study them and such." Chrysalis nodded, taking in all the information. Nightmare Moon rolled her eyes, feeling bitter as usual.

"So once she does all that, she finds a way into the chamber of the elements. Then what?" Nightmare Moon questioned, high temper raising. She did not particularly like listening to babble that she would take no part in. Discord smirked, placing a claw on the top of her head for a pat for only a slip second. He pulled back in time to dodge the oncoming mane slap.

"This is where I come in. You see, I believe I have cracked a code in the Elements of Harmony. If I can alter them to the opposite, Disharmony, even just fora moment, I believe I would be able to escape my stone prison. Which is where you will bring the Elements after you take them, Chrysalis." He explained, chuckling as he lifted his own tea cup of chocolate milk to his mouth. "And after I'm free, your return will be the first thing on my list, Nightmare."

"I'm not convinced a being such as Chrysalis can handle such a task." Nightmare said as she looked over at the changeling queen, raising her own cup once again for a drink.

"Just like how I'm not convinced that your head's not bald." Chrysalis replied slyly.

"I. Am. Not. BALD. It is a swirling mist of magical energy that I can manipulate to my wi--"

"Bald."

"SHUT UP YOU IMPUDENT FOAL!" Nightmare Moon screamed at Chrysalis, leaning out of her chair slightly. The changing queen kept a straight face though, only glancing up at the queen of the night.

"Ladies, ladies, please, calm down." Discord motion mocking. If he weren't currently trying to be serious, he would actually be cheering them on. But the current situation was too serious. The nightmare queen growled and lean back in her chair, letting out a small sigh as she tried to relax.

"Alright, alright. So, let me get this straight. Chrysalis will be tasked with gathering the Elements, in order for Discord to break free and releasing me from my... Self. And then the three of us take Canterlot and defeat the elements, correct?" Nightmare Moon questioned, actually seeing some profit from this, although she still saw it as a hopeless cause. Discord nodded, along with Chrysalis. She hummed, thinking a possible way to better the plan. After all, this way she could take some of the credit.

Then it hit her, plain as day.

"Well, shapeshifter, I know who you can take position of." Nightmare Moon said with a dark grin. "Me. Or, as others know me currently, Princess Luna. As a Princess, as I'm sure you'll know, the subjects submit their love to their fair rulers. Now, you won't have to steal any love, and as such, you won't need to corrupt anypony nearby. And, well, with me, Nightmare Moon, as an asset, I believe, with the amount of time I have spent preparing for such a return, I will have enough control over Luna to lower her power by the time you decide to move forward with this plan."

Smugly, the Queen of the Night took a sip of her chocolate milk and looked back to her audience. Chrysalis was smiling viciously, nodding in agreement with the dark mistress. Discord on the other hoof was snoring loudly, laying back as he slept. He was soon reawakened, however, when Nightmare Moon delivered a hard kick into his stomach out of annoyance.

Discord yelped, his mismatched claws clutching his belly. He groaned in pain, and gave the dark mistress a confused look.

"What was that for?!"

"You were sleeping."

"But I was tired..."

"We are in the reality of the dreamworld. It is impossible for someone to feel tired here, since we are technically already asleep. To fall asleep again when it is not needed would make sen--"

Nightmare Moon paused, somewhat frustrated but also impressed. "You cheeky little devil."

Discord only replied with a half linden smirk, giving the spirit a very sinister look. "Oh, yes, quite. Now, I do think your idea is rather solid, but where shall we hide Princess Luna? Surely they have the Canterlot Caves regularly checked after the events of the wedding. And it isn't as easy as taking a being like Cadance captive. She is a child compared to the two alicorn goddesses."

Chrysalis nodded, looking down and closing her eyes in thought. It wasn't easy subduing Cadance when she first tried, and if Chrysalis was going to capture Luna, even with her power low, she would need to prepare.

"So, what now?" The changeling queen asked. Discord simply shrugged, finishing his drink.

"I say you hide her in the cave you are currently residing in." Discord smiled as he replied. "After all, it should take too long. If everything goes according to plan, we may have ourself free within one day's time." The two mares nodded.

"A simple levitation spell while Luna sleeps shouldn’t be hard. And when she awakes, hopefully she'll be too drowsy to try anything lethal. I believe me and my minions could subdue her until then."

Discord nodded. This was all going together perfectly. He knew Luna slept heavily during the day, and that made it easy for her capture.

"Nightmare Moon, I know you and Luna share the same writing. Please..." He snapped his claws, and a piece of parchment and a quill appeared on the table. "Copy down everything I write."

The nightmare nodded, and listened to discord as she began to write a letter to any who would receive it.

To anypony is may concern,

I have simply gone out for the day for a nice day flying in the shine of the sun, maybe meet some friends along the way. I won't be gone too long, or maybe I shall, but I will make sure that I am back in time to raise the moon. Do not worry.

Princess Luna

The dark mistress placed the quill down, smirking.

"They will have no idea." She snickered.

"Well, I believe the meeting tonight has been adjourned. Let the plan begin." Discord stated, snapping his fingers as the table below him and all the items on it disappeared. The black eternity around began to blur into a white. Chrysalis began to seem sleepy, her eyes getting heavy.

"Celestia must be beginning to raise the sun. Well, good luck everypony!" He cheered as he too began to fade into a blur. Nightmare Moon soon joined, bowing her head. Chrysalis simply slumped over, embracing the awaking.

Chrysalis awoke in her new cave, the sun goddess's sun gleaming radiantly in her eyes. She shuddered, her head lifting from the ground weakly. She felt hunger swoop over her, but she ignored it for now. For soon, her hunger would be satisfied. She turned to her now few changeling subjects also beginning to awaken. She moved over to them, and raised a hoof. The Changlings immediately recognised this as the symbol of power, and lined up in front of her. It was then she began discussing the future plan for the control of Equestria.

Nightmare Moon stood by the bed of the now resting Luna, and began to try and take more possession while she slept. She stirred, but nothing serious, and Nightmare Moon ever so patiently began draining her of most of her instantaneous power, which was where alicorns drew their energy from for attacks. She chuckled, the plan was coming together rather perfectly. She could feel Discord's energy out in the gardens, and an incoming energy she recognised rather easily. Equestria would be lucky if they managed to see another day after this.

In the sculpture gardens outside the castle of Canterlot, a certain mismatched draconequus stood still as a statue. Several ponies looked at him with distaste and dispose, as if he were an abomination. He would have laughed at them if he were not trapped in stone. But, rather than give the ponies the luxury of a mental reaction, his mind was rather busy with the seemingly mischievous bird perched on his head. He hoped, for once to Celestia, that his subtle fear would come true. He swore his return would be a joy for him, and personally try to make Celestia's life a living hell with a serious of annoying pranks. He would also need to revisit Twilight Sparkle. Maybe he could turn her library full of books into a library filled with paper airplanes. That shoot lasers that tickle what ever they touch. He smirk in his mind.

Chrysalis looked to the horizon, her Changlings at the ready. "They will pay..."

Nightmare Moon grinned as she felt Luna beginning to weaken. "We will rise..."

Discord sighed in satisfaction as the bird upon his head began flying upwards. "And claim the world."

The chaotic god heard a dreaded splat sound. He felt an unknown hatred boiling up inside his chest, like a demon waiting to be released from his cage that it had been stuck in for millions of years. After all, wouldn't you be pissed if a bird shat on your cement head?

"Right after I make every species of birds into small flies."