A Derp in Time

by SirVindicator

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Random, Adventure, Derpy Hooves, Twilight Sparkle, The Legend of Zelda, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Starlight Glimmer, Original Character
Length: 2442

Derpy Hooves going on a adventure.

Derpy Hooves has been chosen by The Maiden of the Stars to save Equestria from the wrath of two terrible future dictators, Rainbow Dash and Starlight Glimmer. They get possessed by mysterious creatures and become mad. They then usurp Twilight and turn her and other alicorns to stone, a year after Twilight becomes the ruler of Equestria. And now they want to mess with time. It is up to the Hero of Time, Derpy Hooves to acquire the Master Sue; the Curse Word; and the Tablets of Courage, Wisdom, and Strength and use them to defeat Rainbow Dash and Starlight Glimmer.

Published 2019-10-30 04:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-10-31 05:44:37 UTC

I guess that makes sense...

It all begins the town of Ponyville, four days after the royal coronation of Twilight Sparkle. It was a quiet night and many creatures were asleep. The moon was full and everything was peaceful. The wind did not howl nor whistle. The nighttime air was crisp and cool. The owls didn't even sound. The ponies of Cloudsdale were all snug in their Cloud beds, except for one pony, Derpy Hooves. She decided to sleep on her own near Cloudsdale on a cloud several meters away. She was a mail carrier and delivered dozens of packages and letters as well as managed the main desk. She was also pretty clumsy but in spite of her clumsiness she got her job done...well enough and was even considered for a promotion more than once. She laid on the cloud peacefully content with her life as a mail carrier. She had thought before what it was like to have a grand purpose like Twilight or her friends, but this is something that she would just dismiss afterwards as an idea. This was because in her mind she didn't need to have a destiny like that she was fine where she was and she was happy with her life and all the friendly faces that she would meet on the job. In fact one of those friendly faces was the former princess Luna, who loved to visit the post office at least once the week, fascinated the processes there. At first it was quite surprising, but after a while it became routine to see her at post office and she even accompanied Derpy on some of her rounds delivering mail to the ponies and other creatures all over Equestria. Another notable face was Gabby Gums, who still works as a mail delivery griffon in Griffonstone and she is a Cutie Mark Crusader. She and Derpy would often run into each other on while delivering letters. She is always so cheery, it is impossible not to smile when she is around. She is certainly different from the others griffons who barely give themselves the time of day, let alone ponies.

Derpy Hooves then thought to herself, "Why would I need big destiny or quest to go, anyway? I don't need be a 'chosen one' to feel important."

At least that's what she thought until it happened. She was sleeping peacefully when suddenly a voice woke her. She glanced up from her cloud to see an ethereal pony floating right next to her, a light blue light shining down on the pony from a star far away. The pony was a tall female unicorn, half transparent and blue with flowing hair not unlike the princesses'. Derpy Hooves' eyes widened, she was startled by the figure in front of her.

The pony said in a smoothing but eerie voice, "Greetings fateful mail carrier I am The Maiden of the Stars. And I have very big news for you, news that will change your entire life. I have chosen you to undertake a quest
This quest will ensure that Twilight Sparkles will remain in power and continue to keep Equestria a peaceful place."

Derpy Hooves said tiredly, "Uh...quest...why and who are you?"

The Maiden of the Stars then continued, "I have chosen you and you alone for this quest. For you see it is because of your experience with traveling that you are perfect for the journey ahead. You're probably wondering why I am here and what this quest is about. I am a Celestial Observer, I come from the stars above and I have observed that a year from now two ponies will try and usurp Twilight's throne and they will succeed, unless you help."

Derpy Hooves said still half awake, "Who...Are...They?"

"You should know them, their names are Rainbow Dash and Starlight Glimmer but they are not the two ponies that you knew before. For you see in the future they are possessed by two mysterious creatures from outside of time that caused them to go mad. And with their own special talents and the abilities that the creatures hold themselves they were able to usurp the throne and usher in a new era of terror and misery. Afterwards, they will seek to alter our timeline. These creatures seek to become the dictators of Equestria and the only way that they can be defeated is if they are caught early on, with the special artifacts. These artifacts are as follows; the Tablets of Courage, Wisdom and Power; The Curse Word and the Master Sue. I will also read you a list of them with what each does as well, so do not worry about the details. It is the least that I can do after the mistake that I've made. You see I found out about this too late, the creatures have already possessed them and are able to control them in the daytime but not the nighttime, but the good thing is that the creatures do not have full control yet so they can barely use their own abilities, let alone the abilities of the ponies that they possessed. However, still be on guard these two ponies will not take kindly to you while you're on this quest."

Derpy Hooves said yawning, "OK, I'll accept your quest...but I really need to go back to sleep."

The Maiden of the Stars responded, "Yes. Sleep now, for you will need all your energy in the morning. You have a long, perilous journey ahead of you and I will do what I can to make sure that you have the supplies necessary to embark. Sleep well, Chosen One. All of Equestria is in your hooves."

And with that The Maiden of the Stars left, is ascending back into the sky.

Derpy Hooves then thought to herself before drifting off to sleep, "Is all of this true? Do I have a destiny beyond delivering mail? Yeah, on second thought, Twilight got to become ruler of Equestria; I what wonder I will get. And it's all for Equestria. I guess that makes sense..."

To be continued...

The Tablet of Strength

It was morning in Ponyville. Derpy Hooves had woken up to the sound of birds chirping and sound of a river flowing nearby. She took a moment to look around and found that something was very different. First things first, she was in a grassy field as opposed to the cloud that she slept in. Secondly, she was no longer a pegasus, but an earth pony, a fact that she noticed and became more or more astonished by is she examined herself. She also noticed that next to her there some new clothes set out next to her and neatly folded. They were a green pointed hat, a green vest and a brown long sleeve shirt. There was also a boomerang next to her. Also her original cutie mark was gone and replaced by a new one, it had three disorganized yellow triangles on it. Suddenly a voice came out of nowhere, it belonged to The Maiden of the Stars.

"Hello, my chosen one, I am glad to see that you were awake. I hope that these changes made are not too startling."

"Where am I? What happened to my wings and my cutie mark?"

"You will not get them back until the quest is complete. I did this to protect your identity so that no one will recognize who you are. You are now an earth pony."

The Maiden of the Stars paused for a bit and it continued, "Your first task is to retrieve The Tablet of Strength as it will aid you in getting the other two tablets."

"How?"

"You will find out after you get it. Now I need you to get your clothes on and get the boomerang that I gave you. You will need them to go on to a store that is directly East of the first cave that you will visit. There you can get supplies for your quest, but before you go there you will need to seek the old creature that lives in the cave just over the hill, North of here. He will help you on your quest."

Derpy Hooves followed her instructions getting the clothes on and picking up the boomerang with her mouth. The Maiden of the Stars was displeased, she said, "Is that any way to pick up a quest item?"

"What's wrong with the way I picked it up?"

"This is a valuable Quest item you need to do it with some passion. I will show you the way that I want you to pick up these items."

Suddenly a wooden version of Derpy appeared out of nowhere. Derpy dropped the boomerang and the wooden version of her picked it up with its front hooves and stood on its back hooves and presented the item to the sky, mouth somewhat agape. A triumphant jingle then played.

"And this is how I want you to pick up very special items, like The Tablet of Strength."

The wooden version of Derpy Hooves then picked up the boomerang again and presented it with passion to the sky, this time with a big grin on its face. A triumphant jingle played, this time with trumpets sounding loudly.

"Did you get all of that?"

*Derpy Hooves nods her head up and down.*

"Good, now off you go hero the fate of all Equestria is that state."

"But wait, how will the way I pick up items be important? Also, where are you? I can hear you in my head, but you're nowhere around."

"I am communicating with you telepathically and the way you pick up items will show me whether or not I was right on you being a chosen one. Now, I already told you to go off."

As the wooden version of her disappeared, she set off towards the cave, making sure that she remembered the boomerang. After a little bit of walking she arrived at the cave's entrance. A voice beckoned her to come in and she did so, reluctantly. She then arrived at the center of the cave to see a cloaked figure between two flames.

As Derpy Hooves approach the figure, he stopped her and said, "Hello young traveler! I am the old creature of this cave. Tell me do you wish to set off on a journey to save all of Equestria?"

Derpy nodded her head.

"Then here! it is dangerous to go alone, take this."

It was a short wooden staff with a gold ball in shape of Twilight's head at the end of it. Derpy Hooves did exactly what she was instructed to do when picking up quest items. She picked it up with her front hooves and stood on her back hooves presenting the item to the sky with with her mouth agape. And sure enough, a triumphant jingle played.

The creature then said trying to hold back some giggles, "You truly are the chosen one of the Maiden. Good luck on your quest!"

Derpy Hooves left the cave and proceeded onward to the store that The Maiden had mentioned. The sounds of laughter could be heard echoing throughout the cave. After several miles of walking and a run-in with some ravens, she made it to the store. She walked in and observed how you judge the inside of the store was with many different items lining the walls.

"Hello? My name is Derpy Hooves. I was sent here by The Maiden."Derpy said as she noticed that the store appeared to be empty.

Then all of a sudden a sales clerk appeared from behind the counter. She was a short female earth pony with fiery yellow and pink hair.

She then said cheerfully, "Welcome to the store with no name. My name is Spice Barrel. We sell all kinds of things to travelers like you. How may I help you?"

Derpy responded, "I'm on a quest to save Equestria and--"

She was cut off by a voice that came from one of the store's higher shelves. It yelled, "Hey where am I? What the hay happened to me last night? Whatever I drank was flipping crazy. Seriously, why am I up here and why the freak am I smaller and have ancient writing on my stomach. Wait, 'hey'? 'Flipping'? 'Freak'? I didn't mean to say any of that. Why can't I swear?"

"I have a surprise for you Derpy in the back of the store. A very special tablet that only a chosen few creatures can use. And if you were sent by The Maiden, then you must be one of those creatures. Please, come this way."said Spice Barrel.

Derpy Hooves responded, "Okay..."

"No wait, answer me!! Where am I?!"

Before the voice could get an answer Spice Barrel rushed Derpy Hooves to a private room behind the counter with all of store's secret and precious items were. In the room, where items only offered to a chosen few customers. Derpy Hooves immediately noticed a tablet on a marble pedestal.

Spice Barrel then noticed where Derpy Hooves was looking and said, "I see you have one of your eyes on a new item that I found last month. It's called the Tablet of Strength. Legend says that whoever is worthy enough to use the tablet will gain immense strength."

Derpy blurted out, "That's it! That's one of the items that The Maiden of the Stars told me I have to get it for my quest."

"Don't say her full title out loud."

"Oh sorry."

"I'll make you a deal. If you can use the tablet to lift that large, really heavy iron ball over there on the left side of the room and carry it to the opposite side, then you can have the tablet for free. Sounds like a pretty good deal doesn't it?"

Derpy Hooves just nodded her head. Spice Barrel gave Derpy the tablet. Derpy then went over to the iron ball with the tablet and tried to lift it with her back hooves and to her surprise, she did it. She then put the iron ball on her back and carried it over to the other side of the room and placed it down on the floor.

"Well a deal's a deal! The Tablet of Strength is yours."

Derpy Hooves then picked up the tablet of power and held it over her head with a big grin on her face. A triumphant jingle then played, trumpets sounding loudly.

Author's Note

Please give feedback and I hope you all enjoy this chapter.