Nightmare Night Crackshipping
Ponyville is lively tonight. The Nightmare Night party is in full swing. DJ-PON3 is keeping the ponies on the dance floor moving, Pinkie's sweet treats are bringing a smile to everypony's face, and Applejack's keeping the cider flowing. Non-alcoholic, of course. Nopony is dumb enough to let Pinkie Pie within reach of insanity fluid. The whole town is happy and partying except for three creatures. One pony, one draconequus, and one human.
"I'm sorry," Discord says, facing Twilight. "Can you repeat what you just said?"
"Sure!" Twilight says. "This is my boyfriend, Ferdinand von Aegir."
Ferdinand von Aegir stands next to Twilight. He waves to Discord. Discord stares at Ferdinand. Ferdinand stares at Discord. ~~Pinkie stares at you through the fourth wall.~~ Ignore that.
"So..." Discord says, after an uncomfortably long amount of time staring at Twilight's boyfriend. "How did you two meet each other? And when? And why haven't I heard of this before?"
"It all started about a year ago," Ferdinand says.
"A year," Discord repeats. "A. Whole. Entire. Year. And you said nothing," he growls, turning to Twilight.
"Well, we've known each other for about a year. We've only been dating since last Valentine's Day." Twilight tries to defend herself. "Well, Hearts and Hooves Day for you and me. Humans call it Valentine's Day."
"That's still more than eight months since this relationship began," Discord points out.
"You said you wanted to hear how this started," Ferdinand says. "I would recommend that you stay quiet if you wish for us to answer."
Discord pouts. "Fine."
"Anyway," Twilight continues. "It all started when Sunset Shimmer and I decided to try some... experiments on the mirror portal that connects our worlds. We may or may not have been extremely sleep deprived and thus made some unwise decisions. Such unwise decisions might have had some influence in the chimicherrychanga apocalypse of Las Pegasus, created a very small hole in space-time, and broken both of Sunset's wrists. But, it also created a small portal that led to Fódlan, where Ferdinand is from."
"I just happened to be the one who found the portal," Ferdinand explains. "Of course, I was curious, so I called through it to see who was there, and it was her," he says, gesturing to Twilight and reaching out to stroke her mane. Twilight smiles at the affection.
"I then cast a spell to trap the portal within a small shard of crystal that I broke off from my palace walls," Twilight says. "And it was a bit tricky, but I also managed to send him another crystal that connected to the portal. We used those crystals to talk to each other, somewhat like how the humans in Sunset Shimmer's world use their technology that they call 'phones.' We talked to each other pretty much every single day since then. It was just so fascinating to learn about his world!"
"We were friends nearly instantaneously," Ferdinand says. "And as time passed, it quickly grew from friendship to romance. About a week before Valentine's Day, I asked Twilight if there was a way that I could come to Equestria for a visit, to see for myself all the amazing things that she had described. And she agreed that it sounded like a good idea. So she spent the week working on expanding the portal, and in a matter of days I was able to pass through to Equestria safely, and there was never once any mishap. She is a hard worker, that one," he says, smiling at his girlfriend.
"You're not so bad yourself," Twilight replies, blushing. "Anyway, I brought him over to Equestria, and on Hearts and Hooves Day, he asked me to be his girlfriend. And obviously, I said yes."
"And I never heard anything about it?" Discord yells at Twilight. "You brought another creature into Equestria and I knew nothing of it? You created new forms of magic and I didn't sense it? And did you mention earlier that you ripped a small hole in space-time? Did I hear that correctly?"
"Yes, you did," Twilight replies calmly. "It won't hurt any of us directly, but it might have changed how gravity works in another galaxy about 542 lightyears from here. Not enough to do any damage, though," she assures.
"But..." Discord is at a loss for words. "What do you two even see in each other? Why do you like each other?"
"Great question!" Twilight says happily. "Now I can't tell you everything that I like about him, because that would take hours. Possibly even years." Ferdinand blushes at Twilight's praise. "But I'll give you a few main points. First off, he's always been kind to me, even on the day when we first met, two alien strangers connected by a magical disaster. And he's always been there to support me when I was stressed out, and always knew just how to calm me down. And he's proven to be rather wise as well, and he's helped me a lot with not stressing out over rulership throughout our relationship." Her eyes shine with adoration as she babbles on. "And he gives the best hugs in the whole universe! Seriously! I can't help but spend pretty much every day wanting to be in his arms again. And he's just so loving and genuine and I just love him so much and-"
"Okay, I get it," Discord says, as he snaps his fingers to mute Twilight. "And as for you?"
"Well," Ferdinand says, "She is the princess of friendship after all, and she certainly lives up to the title. She always looks for the best in others, even when it's hard to find, and she encourages everyone around her to be the best that they can be. She is very smart and her love of learning is highly admirable. She also has a strong moral character, which is something that I value in anyone. And she is not afraid to speak up for what is right. And on top of all that, she is quite beautiful." Twilight blushes, giggling.
Discord stares at the happy couple for about a minute. They stare back. ~~Pinkie has been staring at you through the fourth wall this entire time and will be reporting back to your FBI agent.~~ Please ignore that.
With a sigh, Discord slithers away. The party continues. Twilight and Ferdinand hit the dance floor, and Discord vows to pay more attention to his friend's lives, a feat that would be easier if a small hole in space-time wasn't slowly eating away at his sanity without him ever realizing it.
Author's Note
I AM FERDINAND VON AEGIR
