Life Is Only Real When You Are Near

Twilight turned the last page of the manuscript, text down, blank up, and blinked in total disbelief.

“I don’t know what to say,” she said, breathless. “The plot, the characters, the prose – it’s all so well written. I couldn’t stop reading the moment I turned the first page.”

Rainbow stood with her left side propped against the table, paring her left hoof with her wing. “Told you she’s good.”

Frowning, Twilight put her forelegs down on the crystal rocky floor, turned left, looked at Rainbow.

“I’ve never met such literary talent before. Well, a living literary talent, that is. It’s a shame she wants to remain anonymous.”

Rainbow nodded, her eyes closed. “As invisible as the wind.”

Twilight cast her eyes between the manuscript and Rainbow, her eyebrows knitted, her right hoof lodged underneath her chin. Rainbow observed Twilight’s obvious meditations with total ease. To pass such writing would be foolish. Twilight wasn’t a fool at all.

Twilight shifted her head from the heap of papers to Rainbow for the last time and said, “Okay, I’ll send it to Canter Press immediately. I didn’t spot any plot inconsistencies, spelling, grammar mistakes – and I never miss any – so it’s good to go. That should make you happy, Rainbow, since you insisted for it to be published out as fast as possible.”

Rainbow stood straight and smiled. “That does make me happy. She will appreciate it as well.”

“There’s one tiny problem, though. Did your friend think of a pseudonym?”

“A what?”

“If she doesn’t want to be found she needs to adopt a fake name. I can’t send it without giving the agency a name.”

Rainbow widened her eyes and gulped.

“Did she have any pseudonym in mind?”

Rainbow’s eyes darted around feverishly. She turned her head left and scanned the bookshelves.

“Rainbow?”

Rainbow looked back at Twilight, focused and frowning, then said, “Gaskin Burst. Yeah! That's what she said! Exactly that!”

Twilight relaxed her stare and grinned. “Wow! Not only is she a superb writer but likes equine cestoda and kirin eroto-alchemycal poetry as well! We should definitely meet and have a talk together. I would love to pick her brain and ask he how did she learn to write so well.”

“No! She doesn’t want that! She’s very shy. And kinda insecure.”

“Is it Fluttershy? Being an INFP it’s not surprising that she has such good writing skills – a lot of INFPs have. Might explain the parasitology quirk, too.”

Rainbow shook her head then said, “No, it’s not Fluttershy.”

Pensive, Twilight frowned. “I don’t remember seeing you with any new ponies, Rainbow, so it must somepony out of town.”

“When did you hear about Tree Hugger?”

“Right before the Gal-oh, I get it. Just because we’re always together doesn’t mean there are things that don’t escape my attention. Speaking of which” – Twilight moved closer to Rainbow, so close she could feel Twilight's warm breath caress her forehead and cheeks – “would you like to have lunch with me at Anna Coronet’s restaurant?”

Rainbow scratched the back of her neck. “Sorry. Can’t do. I have a training session with Derpy this afternoon.”

Twilight, her eyes pleading, took a step back. “How about dinner at six?”

“No, can’t do. Me and Derpy are having hayburgers at Ergot’s Inn.”

Twilight dropped her head, looked at the floor, then stared back at Rainbow and said, “Maybe you can come to the castle at nine and we can have a nice cozy dinner together and then read Daring Do together and talk about the lore? I get lonely here. Your presence would liven up this place quite a bit.”

Rainbow bit her lower lip, rolled up her eyes. “Well, about that…. Derpy said she wanted me to try her new hot chocolate recipe at her place. She has the best chocolate in town.”

Twilight’s chin twitched. She closed her eyes and sighed heavily.

“I… well, I didn’t know you two were so close,” she said.

Rainbow perked up her ears and tilted her head. “What do you mean? We’re just friends doing friend stuff.”

“Really?” Twilight asked. She started pace to and fro across the library. “You didn’t spend a single moment with us outside school this month, preferring to train with Derpy instead. Wait! Not only train but go to the spas, the restaurant, the cinema, the fairs. You even spend the evenings with her. Visit Derpy at her job. Even today you're about to spend the rest of the day with Derpy. It’s obvious that you’re more than friends.”

Rainbow closed her eyes and shook her head. “Nu-uh. It’s what friends do.”

Twilight stopped and looked inquisitively at Rainbow Dash. “Do you see me running to Rarity’s Boutique at every possible opportunity?”

“No.”

“Do I spend almost every evening at Fluttershy’s home?”

“No. You’re always here in this boring castle. Alone. You just asked if I could stay with you?”

“What would you say if you learned that Silverstream and Ocellus spent an evening together?”

Rainbow knitted her eyebrows. “I would say they’re obviously into each other and that’s not my business to meddle into their affairs. Don’t like that mushy stuff anyway.”

“But you do all these things with Derpy, Rainbow Dash! Don’t you see?”

Rainbow scoffed, waved her right hoof. “Come on, Twilight. You’re seeing things that are not there. Me and Dee are just close friends and I’m just being a good friend. Dee doesn’t have many, you know?”

“Ugh,” Twilight said and sat from exhaustion on the floor. “You’re incorrigible, Rainbow.”

Smiling, Rainbow walked near Twilight and placed her right hoof on Twilight’s shoulder. “Look, Twilight, I know you’re kinda out of your element when it comes to romance and all of that but there’s nothing between me and Dee. We’re just friends.”

“I wish I had that nothing between you and me,” Twilight muttered, plaintive.

“But we have that, Twilight. It’s just that Derpy needs my help more than you or Fluttershy or Rarity. A good good friend helps a friend in need, right?”

Unable to formulate any word, Twilight nodded.

“I know I missed a lot of our get togethers, and I’m sorry for that, but Derpy needs me. When she’ll get really good at flying then my job will be done and I’ll come back to all of you, okay?”

Twilight stood on her fours and, returning to her usual busybody self, no sign of sadness on her face, said, “I must say you have quite the teaching talent, judging from your work with the cheerleading team and the Hope’s Hollows’ twins, and I can’t really say that you’re wrong about Derpy – she does indeed fly better than before – so… yeah! Go ahead! Me and the girls understand.”

Rainbow tipped her head and smiled. “I knew you’ll get me. The publishing deal still stands?”

Twilight nodded.

“Good! I’m off.”

Rainbow bent her legs, spread her wings, and was about to lift when Twilight looked at her and said, “It’s Derpy, isn’t it?”

“What’s Derpy?” Rainbow said, straightening, folding her wings.

“The author. Gaskin Burst.”

Rainbows cheeks turned hot and perspiration covered her forehead. She felt rotten all over, like a teenager that had been caught stealing bits out of her mother's purse. What would Derpy say if she knew that her secret – a secret that Rainbow, the embodiment of loyalty, had sworn solemnly to hold – had been discovered so quickly and only because she, Rainbow, had been so careless in her words.

“How did you figure out?” Rainbow asked, her voice feeble, cracking. Weak.

“Simple deduction, Rainbow,” Twilight, head lifted, eyes closed, said. “The only new friend that you have made in the recent weeks is Derpy, therefore this mysterious diffident writer could only be Derpy. It’s improbable that you have a friend so well hidden that none in town have heard of her. If ponies saw you with Derpy and nopony else it means that there are probably no new friends apart from her, ergo Derpy is the writer.”

“Is it so obvious?”

Twilight nodded. “Yes. Don’t worry, I’ll keep the secret. But can you tell at least one thing: where and how did she learn to write?”

Rainbow shrugged. “I dunno. She kinda has a pretty big bookcase – not as big as yours but still pretty big to me – and she writes a lot.”

“Are you sure Derpy doesn’t want to come out?”

“Totally.”

Twilight looked at the floor, sighed, then looked back at Rainbow, nonchalant.

“Why are you doing this, Rainbow? Do you really think that what you’re doing is being friends only?” she asked.

“Well, yes!” Rainbow, beaming, her eyes like stars sparkling, said. “She looks so happy when she smiles. I like seeing Derpy happy. That’s what friends do – make each other happy.”

Twilight stared at Rainbow’s radiant face with a puzzled look, head tilted, one eyebrow lifted. “Are you really that oblivious, Rainbow?”

“Nah, I’m fine. It’s how I show my friendship. Element of loyalty, remember?”

“Why don’t you show that kind of friendship to me?”

Rainbow shrugged. “I dunno. You seem happy. Derpy isn’t. She needs help. But if you need something, you know where to find me.”

With eyes wide from disbelief Twilight observed the element of loyalty, her prismatic friend. Finally she sighed and bent her head.

“Fine, let it be your way,” Twilight, frustrated, said, then added in a murmur to herself. “I wish I had that kind of friendship, though.”

“You said something?” Rainbow, stretching forwards, asked.

Twilight sighed. “No. Nothing. Just thinking aloud. You know me.”

“Yeah! That happens to you a lot. Anyway, I need to to go. It was nice to chat with you and it’s great that you agreed but promise it will stay between you and me. I promised Derpy that I’d keep her secret no matter what”

“My lips are sealed,” Twilight said, then looked at the fat manuscript on the table: a book in potential: a story between eigenstates. “I’ll be dealing with your book. Have a great day!”

“I will. See ya!” Rainbow said, bent her legs, opened her wings, and flapped.

In one single propulsion she was airborne and approaching quickly the opened window, thin and elongated, lancet like in shape, made from stained glass, from bits of pieces coloured purple, green, and blue.

In the vastness of the sky Rainbow felt that usual lightness and exhilaration that came with fluidity and freedom of the flight. By nothing interrupted she could ascend to the highest airs and into the deepest crevices descend, fly in any direction she desired without a single obstacle on her path or allow herself to be carried by the winds. Surrounded by the immensity of the sky, away from the earthly pony life, unhindered by terrestrial worries, games, and frights, Rainbow relaxed and pondered on important matters in total solitude.

Twilight’s words haunted her as she chilled in the chilly high altitude air on her way to meet Derpy, the beautiful mare with slanted eyes that lit up so magically every time she smiled. She and Derpy were only friends; they didn’t do anything that could be considered as sappy, cuddly, mushy. Rainbow helped Derpy and that was it.

Sure, she did have some intimate thoughts – erotic fantasies that emerged to the surface in the times between waking and sleep both in the morning and at night – but they were just that: fantasies, reveries, lubricious dreams. One things is to imagine stuff; the other to perform. But what if she could?

Rainbow shook her head.

No!

Phantoms should remain phantoms. She could indulge them as much as she wanted back in the safety of home where nopony would ever discover this side of hers, hugging pillows, rubbing sheets; but not for a single infinitesimal moment should she consider actually reifying them in the friendship she established with Derpy Hooves. Just thinking about trotting through Ponyville and stopping beneath an awning to hug and kiss – and hug and kiss in front of everypony, locals, visitors from Canterlot, everycreature else – made Rainbow shiver and sweat. She could imagine their faces, eyes wide open, mouths oscillating as the creatures struggled to contain their laughs, and could anticipate the gossip. Have you seen? Yes, I have seen! Did they kiss? Oh, yes! And her hair tail? Went up, too. What a shame. Yes, indeed.

No!

One embarrassment – so strong that a sliver of its memory vividly restored the clang of metal against her head, the sudden pitch black darkness of the can as well as it slimy and cold steel, and the overwhelming stench of decomposing leftovers, discarded napkins and putrefying fruits – had been enough. She wouldn’t allow herself to feel that weak and ashamed again. The best best thing for her to do was to keep it cool amidst the crowd and unleash the intimate and sweet longings in the privacy of night.

How sweet these thoughts were…

As Rainbow remembered them her cheeks flushed and tingly warmth spread throughout her limbs. Her groin became warm, swollen, heavy, quickly filling up with wetness, glutinous and thick.

In her most private and intimate thoughts Rainbow imagined herself lying intertwined with Derpy on her bed, strongly hugging and kissing softly. She closed her eyes for a moment and imagined the scene from her sweetest dreams: she and Derpy lying on their sides, their noses bumping into each other, Derpy’s warm breath blowing over nostrils, lips, and cheeks, making her relaxed, tingly. Warm.

As she looked into Derpy’s eyes, goofy but so honest and sincere, shining like nothing else in the word, beaming with simple love, Rainbow pushed her head forward and placed her lips on Derpy’s and kissed her in the gentlest way she knew – she couldn’t imagine, even for a fraction of a second, being aggressive with Derpy, kissing Derpy angrily, with brute force. Her desires brimmed with softness that was incredibly familiar but to other ponies totally unknown: a quality of hers that it if were sniffed out would cause of a lot of trouble. In dreams, however, in dreams she could let it be.

Rainbow opened her eyes and saw the clear sky ahead and the hills and throughs shifting down below, the occasional deep green grooves merely a blur due to the speed of her flight. She returned to her daydreams but this time with her eyes wide open.

She imagined as vividly as she could the feel of Derpy’s lips, their smoothness and their wetness, along with the sharpness of her teeth; and she imagined Derpy’s dazed face after the light and gentle kiss, the gray-gold mare lying on the side, her mane strewn all around her, eyes happy and half closed, her nostrils flaring as a drunken smile spread across her face. Rainbow smiled as her fantasy took her downwards, to her leg placed between Derpy’s flanks and rubbing against that wet warm softness that was Derpy’s crotch, her most intimate space.

In her most private dreams she caressed Derpy’s back and shoulders, paying special attention to the skin beneath her wings, while her thigh moved up and Derpy’s crotch and spread liquid between Derpy’s legs; and as her own hoofing approached release Rainbow imagined that she slid masterfully down, lifted Derpy’s leg, saw Derpy’s flower, which she always imagined as hibiscus red, inhaled the bodily piscine scent and lunged forward and lapped Derpy’s bloom up and down, from the clit to the bottom and from the bottom to the clit. What always brought Rainbow over the edge, made her body involuntarily wave and slither from the tingling shivers of orgasm, was imagining Derpy’s moans which started as whimpers but quickly grew into deep and throaty moans of joy.

Once again Rainbow shook her head.

Just a quick irruption of her longings made her warm all over, tingly between her legs. The pleasant and tingling heaviness and wetness beneath her tail demanded satisfaction. On every other day she could find or create a nice solitary cloud, plunge into its plump fuzzy fluffiness, let her mind unwind the reels that held her erotic reveries and enjoy herself slowly, fully, to the max as she tickled with a warm and soft and fuzzy bump of cloud her heavy, swollen, tingling crotch. Right now, however, Derpy awaited her. Rainbow could see the all so familiar stretch of grass, right next to the menacing green of the Everfree, ahead.

There was one little problem, though, that was common to lascivious thoughts: once you stepped on red path of sensual lust it was difficult to stop. A barrage of memories and kinks flooded Rainbow’s mind as she flew the last miles to the training ground where Derpy, ever punctual, already sat and awaited her. She craved for her pillows once again as memories of pleasant mornings spent with one pillow in her forelegs and one between her hindlegs surfaced like bubbles to the surface of her mind. Rainbow usually got heated up and wet, rubbed one pillow against her inmost hotness, and then brought it to her face while either pulling another between her thighs or catching the bed-sheets and rubbing it against her bloom. As she inhaled the thick heady sea like scent Rainbow imagined it was Derpy’s flanks and Derpy’s flower in front of her and believed it was Derpy’s head between her legs, not her pillow, too familiar ad worn out.

To allow some time for recovering her bearings and stilling up her messy mind Rainbow slowed down her speed and started to descend. Pressing pillows wasn’t the only thing she did as she dreamed about playful dalliances with Derpy. While showering Rainbow bent her forelegs, stretched her hindlegs, lifted her tail, and then brought the shower-head, its water flow light, against her nethers and imagined that the water pouring down her inflamed tingly bloom and tickling pleasantly her ruby was Derpy’s tongue, lightly flicking her clit, gently lapping downwards the inner surface of her folds. To add some change Rainbow sometimes stood on her hindlegs, backed against the wall, grabbed the showerhead with her both hooves and pressed it tight against her bloom, thinking it was Derpy on her knees, feasting languidly and lightly on Rainbow's lower lips.

No! Not now!

Rainbow focused, saw Derpy right ahead, and landed. The moment her hooves touched the hard ground she pressed her rainbow tail against her joy, swollen, tingling. Wet. One look at Derpy, however, showed Rainbow the weakness of her will.

Everything about the gray-gold horse who looked so innocent and youthful turned Rainbow on. Her unruly mane, the tips of the hair sticking haphazardly from the top of her head, the back and the sides of her neck. Her sinuous svelte body, athletic, curvy, thin: perfection of pegasi physique. The shapely curve of her flanks along with that weird mark of hers that nopony could understand but, as Rainbow realized, had zero connection with the post office. Her golden tail, rivers of gold reflecting from its sandy yellow hair, that swished right and left and occasionally went up. Even the shadows on Derpy’s inner thighs, darker around her groin but disappearing into the grayness of her coat around her knees, fanned Rainbow’s fiery want. But most of all Rainbow enjoyed Derpy’s eyes, one looking up, the other down, rarely aligning and becoming straight.

As she looked into Derpy’s eyes, which had a puzzled expression, Rainbow understood that she wanted to wake up to this tilted gaze, to embrace Derpy and kiss her and bring Derpy to supreme bliss as she held Derpy as close as possible to her, her leg rubbing lightly against Derpy’s bloom, feeling its wetness and its heat, and dissolved into those warm beautiful eyes, innocent, sincere, and deep.

At that moment, contemplating Derpy, Rainbow realized that she had been wrong and Twilight had been correct. It was more than friendship at this point.

“Is everything fine?” Derpy asked, her head tilted.

Rainbow returned to the present moment, smiled coyly, rubbed her nape. “Yeah... Everything’s fine. I got lost for a moment. You look good, by the way.”

Derpy simpered and blushed.

“Thanks,” she said, then looked at ground and brushed the ground with her right hoof. “Should we start training?”

“Yeah! Yes! Of course,” Rainbow said in a loud voice that sounded almost like a shout. She was glad the topic shifted. She felt down because a part of her – a very pushy part of her – had wanted to see the original topic of discourse unravel.

“What have you planned for today?”

“Let’s start with some warm up, then we’ll proceed to the loops,” Rainbow said. “If you’ll do well, then we’ll try the simple lucky clover, okay?”

Derpy, smiling, nodded, then spread her wings and flapped.

Rainbow, tail as close as possible to her nethers, followed her.

She flew to Derpy’s left as they did the obligatory warm up exercises, banking right and left, performing rolls. As the intensity of the exercises increased, desire abandoned Rainbow and she felt light and free. Even if she did have feelings for Derpy – tender, sensual, and sweet – it didn’t mean she must let them out. At the surface she and Derpy were friends; deep inside, in the privacy of her heart, she could love Derpy as passionately and delicately as she could without any single worry about either ridicule or shame.

What Rainbow forgot to take into account was that the body and its language always betrays the inner state and that some ponies knew how to read its signs and omens well.

What Rainbow didn’t know was that Derpy belonged to such group.