You Smoke?

by Nuclear Slime

Rating: teen
Tags: Spike, Comedy, Starlight Glimmer, Gore, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Dark, Human, Main 6, Original Character
Length: 1412

As professionals, it is always clear that you will struggle with your work from time to time.

Being a professional at what you do has its ups and downs. One of those downs are that you might be given a task that would be too hard even for you.

But that shouldn't matter here, as being professional here means as long as you do your job correctly, then it shouldn't be too hard.

Just try and have a plan first before you do something reckless. It might just cost you your life.

Published 2019-11-03 08:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-11-03 08:20:01 UTC

Pt. 1 "Got a Lighter?"

As per his usual nightly schedule, Easy Breeze exited the giant skyscraper that was his job. Working late had become routine for him, however he still would get tired from a long days of work. Yawning into the night skye and ruffling his wings from the cold wind, Easy decided to head home.

He could easily fly there, but decided to take a walk instead to take in the view of the night life. Watching ponies of all kinds going about and having their late time fun was always interesting for him. As he continued to walk, he would constantly feel gust after gust of cool air hit him, making his dark blue mane move on its own.

It’s seems that Autumn is about to start any day now. Easy Breeze smiled, thinking about that as it was his favorite season of the year. Not trying to fall into daydreaming, Easy picked up the pace in his steps. He quickly remembering that his brother from Fillydelphia was going to visit and was set to arrive late tonight. He didn’t want his wife to handle him all on her own, so to get on time, Easy picked a shortcut through the park.

Rows after rows of trees lined the park, reaching high into the sky and almost blocking the moon from shining down onto the gravel path. Their dark bark and leaves almost blending into the natural darkness of the night. Few light posts were aligned on the path, giving of small hints of light to guide ponies on their travels through the park.

Easy Breeze took in the scenery as he hurried along, giving of a smile as he did. As he was looking around, he spotted a figure leaning against a tree for seemingly no reason. It seems that the figure spotted Easy as well, as it called to him.

“Hey you,” it said, as it stopped leaning against the tree and began to slowly walk towards him. As it came closer towards Easy, he could start to see what it was much clearer, thanks to the light from the light post that was nearby. “Are you Easy Breeze?”

Now at full view, Easy could see that what was talking wasn’t a pony. No, it was too tall for that. But it wasn’t a diamond dog nor a minotaur. What could this thing possibly be? Not wanting to be rude and have its question unanswered, Easy nodded. “That I am. May I ask who and perhaps what you are?”

The figure chuckled as it scratched it chin with its weird looking claws. Its body was covered in clothes, as it reached down withs it right claw into a pants pocket and pulled out a cigarette. “I am have a lot of names, really. Most of them involves curse words,” it started to explain, putting the cigarette into its mouth. With its left claw, it went into another pants pocket to pull out a match, scratching it onto the belt it was wearing around its pants and lighting the match ablaze. With the newly lit match, the creature used it to light his cigarette to life. It inhaled, letting the cigarette coat the inside of the creatures throat with its smoke, bit not for long as the creature grabbed the cigarette between its right calw and exhaled the smoke into the night air. “But for you, I will be called Burn Out.”

Easy Breeze gave a slow nod, grimacing a bit as the creature, now known as Burn Out, started to smoke. “As for what I am,” it said and dropped the match that it had in its left claw into the gravel road, and then reached behind him to pull out a piece of paper. The creature brought the paper to its eye level and and began to quickly look through it. “I would be a contractor.”

As it said that, Burn Out would take a glance towards Easy, a glance that made him feel a bit worried. It didn’t help as the creature went to take a puff of smoke from its cigarette. “A contractor? That’s nice, I guess.” He tried to make some small talk to easy into this odd situation that he had gotten into.

It exhaled another cloud of smoke, looked at its cigarette and then back to Easy. “Do you smoke?”

Easy got appalled, his nose scrunched at the mere thought at having one of those death sticks inside his mouth. “No, no I don’t.” He tried to politely answer, but with the face that he was doing, it was kind of hard.

The creature sighed, exhaling some smoke that was still inside its throat. “You ponies never do, do you?” It raised one of its eyebrows, a bit of disappointment in its voice. “I guess you have no lighter then?”

Easy shook his head. “No I don’t. Sorry.” He had gotten a little more used to the creature smoking now, but the thought was still disgusting to him.

With another sigh, Burn Out looked back at its paper. “Figures. A married stallion with a foal on the way should think of the effects it could have.”

Widening his eyes in shock, Easys voice trembling as the creature was telling him this. How did it know that his wife was pregnant? Not even his parents had known about it. It even knew his name somehow, even though they had never met. Now feeling danger, Easy arched his back, wings raised high up into the air as he took a stance. “How did you know that?” Easy asked, his nose puffing out smoke and his right forehoof scratch the gravel road.

“Look,” Burn Out began, touching its cigarette onto the piece of paper, setting it on fire. It then dropped the flaming paper onto the ground, which it then stepped on with its right shoe covered foot. “There are ponies that don’t like you, and I mean really don’t like you.” It pointed one of its claws at Easy. “And for whatever reason, they would pay top money to get rid of you.” It then pointed one of its stubby claws at itself, giving of a toothy grin. “Which in where I come in and claim that money.”

Easy took into the air, flapping his wings as he looked down at Burn Out. “If you think I will just stand here and take your threats, then you are sorely mistaken.” He turned around and began to fly away.

However, Easy wouldn’t get far, as Burn Out flicked its cigarette towards Easys direction. The cigarette caught on fire, turning into a small fire arrow, as it took speed and hits Easy on his left wing joint.

Easy began to scream from the pain, as the fire began to burn onto his sensitive spot of the wing. He couldn’t keep up with it, and quickly feel from the sky, hitting the gravel road in a painful impact. Laying on his side, wincing in pain and trying to put the fire out. His struggle was interrupted as something heavy and hot pressed down onto his head.

He quickly looked as some new pain began to sprout forward, and saw that Burn Out was stepping on his head with its shoe now on fire. It took a knee, leaning downwards to look into Easys eye. “You made me waste a cigarette.” It shook its head like a disappointed parent. “You shouldn’t have done that.”

As it said that, the flames started to quickly cover Easy Breezes body, catching him on fire. Burn Out kept putting pressure onto Easys head, not letting him escape and just instead wail and thrash in pain as the flames started to consume him. That was all Easy could do, scream and shake. All until his body went stiff and his voice died down.

Seeing as Easy now went quiet and still, Burn Out took of its foot from the body as the fire continued to live on. It reached into one of its pants pockets and pulled out a new cigarette. It held it over the flames to light it on. Burn Out puts its newly lit cigarette into its mouth and gave the burning corpse a grin. “Thanks for the light.” As it said that, it turned around and began to walk away from the living camp fire.

Author's Note

Trying to see how this will work.