Fanfic about How ponies wrote fanfics
Bright rays of the morning sun gifted their warmth to the citizens of Ponyville this fine summer day.
Ponies heartedly greeted each other, walking the town streets, going about their business.
Even the songbirds perched in the trees hurried to share the joy of good weather with the world through their ringing trills.
That was how a new day usually began.
That was the picture Rainbow Dash had hoped to see when she woke up eight minutes ago.
An azure pegasus with a rainbow mane shot over the Ponyville's sky, leaving only a rainbow trail behind. She covered the distance from her house on the outskirts of town to the Golden Oaks Library in mere seconds.
"Twilight!" Rainbow Dash shouted, barging through the front door.
The lavender unicorn was sitting at the counter with an ancient tome open in front of her.
"Twilight! It's awful! What are we gonna do now? This is the end! How could she do that? After all we've done for her! She must be persuaded! I need her to understand…"
"Rainbow, calm down," Twilight turned to the fidgeting pegasus flying around the room. "What happened? Who do we have to convince? Explain, please."
"You don't know?" Rainbow Dash froze in midair and stared at her friend.
"No," Twilight replied cautiously.
Disbelief, fear, anger, exhaustion, and confidence all flickered across Rainbow’s muzzle within a few moments of her processing this news.
"Wait here, I'll be right back," with these words the pegasus darted through the still-open door.
Twilight stared after her trail for a moment. Then closed her book and placed it back on the library shelf. Seemed like something really serious has happened.
She didn't have to wait long.
Less than a minute later, the rainbow-maned pegasus was back, flying inside the library at full speed and barely managing to brake and avoid crashing into the bookshelf.
"That's what happened!" Rainbow pushed Twilight's nose into an open copy of the .
The unicorn patiently picked up the paper with her telekinesis, moved it to a comfortable reading distance, and began to read aloud:
"The intricacies of the work of the castle's baker. Royal Sister’s favorite dishes."
"What?" the pegasus quickly flew behind her to look at the text. "No! Not the title article, here! The third column!"
Twilight shrugged and continued reading:
"The end of the franchise. A.K. Yearling officially announced today that the next book in the Daring Do series, the , will be the last. The story of the famous adventurer is approaching its logical conclusion, and its continuation is not planned by the author…"
"What do we do now?" Rainbow Dash looked at Twilight with hopeful eyes.
"I..." Twilight hesitated. "I don't quite understand. Why is that a bad thing?"
"Why? Why?! You're a fan too! Don't you understand? This is the end! Daring Do will no longer wade through the dangerous jungle! Will not snag powerful artifacts from ancient temples! Won’t fight against the Ahuizotl and his cats and resist the insidious Dr. Caballeron! What will happen to us? To the fans?"
The pegasus finally landed on the floor and stared sadly at her feet.
"We won’t read about any new adventures. Won’t discuss the intricacies of the plot. Won’t draw art of cunning ancient traps, temples, and terrible jungle monsters. Won’t flock to DaringCons to buy hats, or watch as cosplayers try to mimic the accent of Dr. Caballeron... Maybe we'll just forget, what Daring Do stood for... Forget, that if you believe in yourself, then anything can be achieved, in spite of obstacles."
Twilight looked back from pegasus to the paper and silently read the article again.
"And what do you suggest? Show up at A.K. Yearling’s house and persuade her to continue writing books? After the seventeen she'd already written? After she has said that there is nothing to add?"
"Eighteen, if you count the ."
Twilight raised an eyebrow, awaiting for an answer.
"Yes...No...I don't know!"
"Rainbow, did you read the article in full?"
The pegasus visually shrunk from that question.
"Well, there was nothing else about A.K. Yearling"
Twilight rolled her eyes, unfolded the paper, and continued reading.
"That is why, in conjunction with this event, the Manehattan fan club announces a Writers Competition. Write down your original story. Not necessarily about Daring Do; who knows, maybe there is a second A.K. Yearling amongst you! In turn, the fan club promises constructive criticism, useful for aspiring writers, and that the top three stories will make it into the next storybook, which they will print at the end of the year. The volume of the text is from three thousand to eight thousand words. Сompetition writers have to send in their work until the eve of the Summer Solstice!"
Twilight smiled at her wincing friend.
"So, fanfics, huh?"
"As they say, if there is nothing to read-write."
***
"Thank you all for coming," Twilight greeted her friends gathered in the library.
"As you have heard, Rainbow Dash is worried about the release of the last Daring Do book. So I invited Rainbow to participate in a fan story contest. And I thought if you all also take part in it, it will be much more interesting and fun."
"A fanfic contest?" Applejack asked after a bit, "In truth, sugar cube, I ain't 'nough of a fan to write anythin' that'd fit."
"That's okay. The story does not have to be about Daring Do and the ancient temples. Any theme will work. Consider this an opportunity to test your writing skills."
"Oh! Any theme you say? " Rarity smiled slyly.
"Technically, yes. However, if you expect to win, you should write something that the jury will not be ashamed to add to the collection of other stories that will be bought by the ordinary ponies. Perhaps even preschoolers."
"I think that’s a wonderful idea, Twilight!" rang Pinkie’s bright voice. "Writing a story is almost like reading a story, but not quite. When you read a story, you can't affect the plot, and when you write - the plot can't affect you! Besides, in your own story, you can do anything your heart desires! In your hooves, you hold the fate of all the characters, countries, worlds and even the laws of the universe! Absolute freedom!"
"Exactly, but it is better to limit yourself. It is much easier for the reader to like a story if the motivations and actions of the characters are clear, and the structure of their world is logical."
"And... if... the story comes out ... not good," Fluttershy said softly. "It'll be scolded, won't it?"
"Not scolded, but critiqued. The contest was organized by smart, educated ponies. As far as I know, some of them graduated from the Manehattan Philological Institute. They will simply point out the flaws and roughnesses that you probably felt yourself, but could not formulate."
"Still, I'd rather have one new A.K. Yearling book than a whole bookcase full of fanfics," Rainbow Dash said through clenched teeth.
"Well, you are somewhat correct. No one expects fans to immediately write anything as outstanding as A.K. Yearling’s work. But this is not the point of the contest. It is about writing something of your own. Take some interesting idea, put it in the form of a story and share it with all readers!"
"So, if you don't have any interesting ideas in your head, you don’t have to try," Spike said hopefully.
"Oh no, I'm sure every pony, or dragon, has an interesting point of view to share. If you can’t think of anything, you can take something interesting from real life and try to write a story based around that!"
The little dragon frowned and pondered.
"Come on," said Twilight. "I'm sure my number one assistant can write a wonderful story, if he tries hard enough."
"Well..." Spike shifted uncertainty, "I don't know... though... I could write a story about a pony trying to write a story."
"Great idea!" said Twilight. "Torments of creativity, the crisis of inspiration, self-criticism... I would love to read it."
"What will you write about?" Pinkie asked Twilight.
"Well, I used to read a lot of fantastic tales in my free time, and I am very surprised at how important magic is. So, I want to write a story about a world without magic. A world populated only by earth ponies. In which the Sun and Moon rise and set by themselves, obeying no one, and the weather can not be controlled, and can only be predicted by the barely noticeable, obscure signs. How would history develop then? I think those ponies could build a developed, enlightened society with advanced sciences and amazing mechanical devices."
"Oh! Oh! And they captured the energy of lightning! They caught her in a huge metal ring, forcing her to run around in circles and gradually release her power. And she would light the streets with it on dark nights and turn mechanical gears!"
"Pinkie! That is... surprisingly sensible! In real life, lightning is much less magical than it may seem. My earth pony scientists could think of a way to harness this mighty element for their needs!"
"I’m wondering what’ll Pinkie write about?" asked Applejack.
"Oh, I've got it all figured out! I'll write about raisin cookies!"
"Raisin cookies?" asked Applejack. "What’s so interesting about raisin cookies?"
"A lot of things," smiled Pinkie. "Let's start with the fact that sometimes raisin cookies have dried apricots instead of raisins, but if dried apricots replace all the raisins in the cookie, then it's wrong to call it a raisin cookie. Therefore, we would have to refer to cookies with raisins as cookies with dried apricots. So one day a Pony-without-a-name walks into a candy store and says, And the seller replies: , . And so, the seller takes out a dried apricot cookie, which got raisins in it, replaces the raisins with dried apricots, so that it becomes a dried apricot cookie, and then replaces all the dried apricots with raisins, because the Pony-without-a-name asked to. Pony-without-a-name, having seen that the order was executed perfectly, takes from his saddlebag twice the half for his order, the first half and the second half, and gives it to the seller. the seller says. replies Pony-without-a-name, and adds a zero-half value for his order. Then Pony-without-a-name takes his order, goes out through the door, away from the bakery, away from the town and away from himself, and ends up in Raisin forest. This Raisin forest is called so, because all the trees have apricots instead of leaves, and the paths are lined with cookies…"
"Stop, please, stop!" pleaded Applejack, completely bewildered, to the annoyance of the other listeners, who liked Pinkie's story quite a lot. "Twilight, what Pinkie just did... is it even legit?"
"A classic case of absurdism, when the free flight of imagination goes beyond common sense. This genre of literature has gained considerable popularity recently."
Applejack shook her head.
"All them complicated ain’t fer' me. If I write anything, it will be something simple. With a clear an’ consistent plot. Some classy story 'bout a noble pony in shining armor, rescuing his beloved from the clutches of an' evil dragon."
"Hey!" said Spike. "Dragons aren't like that."
"Well, to tell you the truth," said Twilight, "around two hundred years ago, a vile dragon with raking claws was the major villain in almost every filly story. This influence on the folklore comes from the echoes of the Dragon-Griffin war. Not the last reason is griffin traders, the general gullibility of the masses, eloquence of the brave Eagl-elions and terrible appearance of adult dragons."
"Yep, yep. Granny Smith used ‘ta tell me bedtime stories like that… So… sorry Spike."
"I can't believe that our boorish Applejack is going to write a story about love," Rarity melted.
"Well, I 'ain't planning on writing about them love-shmove. There's a main character. There's is his beloved. And he's going to save her. Well... at the end of such stories, they uh, usually end uh... with a kiss" Applejack's cheeks flushed with color.
"Oooo. No, I definitely need to drag you to the spa more often. I'm sure there's a lovely sensual mare deep down in your soul, and I'd love to meet her."
"Aw, stop it" the muzzle of the blushing Applejack was already crimson.
"Really, Rarity," chirped Pinkie Pie coming to the farmer’s aid, "leave secret depths of Applejack’s soul alone. For now. Better tell us what your story will be about!"
"My story? I'm not even sure I can devote enough time to writing. After all, I devote so much energy to my boutique! Although, who am I kidding! There is an idea... almost like Applejack's, only more... dramatic... and tragic..." Rarity suddenly rolled her eyes to the ceiling and continued in a sensual voice, as if applying for a theatrical College degree. "She is the crown princess of the kingdom. He - is just a bodyguard. She's a spoiled filly, whose every whim is a law. He devoted his entire life to the study of martial arts to protect those who are dear to him. She was destined for a political marriage of convenience, an unhappy marriage that would be a blessing for her country. He runs the risk of being sentenced to death for inappropriate thoughts that persistently appear in his head. But what he couldn't imagine was that his feelings would be... mutual."
Rarity finished her impromptu performance and looked around the audience. She was pleased with the result.
"That is... interesting," said Twilight. "In the dark ages of ponyhood, before the unification of Equestria, different pony kingdoms often fought each other for land and wealth. And such a barbaric thing as dynastic marriage was a guarantee of peace between the two bordering kingdoms. And with such a starting point as yours, it's unlikely that the story could be brought to a conclusion that wouldn't be tragic. In one way or another."
"Oh, I think I can surprise you," smirked Rarity.
"Um ... Twilight?" Fluttershy’s quiet voice cut in. "I'm sorry, but I probably won't participate."
"You will not? But why? Of course, participation is voluntary, but you have nothing to lose! There will be many different stories from different ponies. If you are too shy about something, we can send in your story under a pseudonym. No one will ever know it is yours!"
"No, that's not the case."
"Then what? Do you think your thoughts are too insignificant to share with readers? If so, I assure you that…"
"No. It's just ... I'm already writing something. A little story. But it won't fit."
"A little story? Would it not fit? If you think it’s too short, we can help with that! How much you already wrote?"
"Well," yellow pegasus swallowed involuntarily, caught in the gaze of her friends, "About a hundred and twenty pages."
There was silence in the library. The indulgent smiles on the muzzles of her friends were slowly replaced by mouths open in surprise.
"How much?" Rainbow Dash asked.
Fluttershy crouched in the corner between the wall and the bookshelf.
"About a hundred and twenty."
"What could you write a hundred and twenty page story about?
"About... loneliness."
The library went silent again. Signs of fear and remorse emerged on her friend’s muzzles.
"Oh! No! It's not like that!" Fluttershy hastened to reassure them. "I don't feel lonely at all! And you are the best friends I could ever wish for! It's just ... I've always wondered what drives a pony. Why do we do what we do? Because we were told to? Because we're afraid of putting ourselves in the wrong light? Because it's just more convenient? What happens if all these restrictions suddenly disappear? What if every word we say, every act we do, is erased from the memory of all the ponies around us? Would we then live in our own pleasure, not caring about everyone around us? Or will we continue to follow social norms that make no sense? Or maybe we would dedicate our lives helping the ponies around us, the ponies who will never remember us or what we did for them…"
The fears and remorse gave way to the expression .
No one suspected that such deep philosophical questions lived in the soul of this delicate, fragile pegasus. And she'd already written a whole book about it too!
"So yes, it is not very suitable for the competition. Besides, a hundred and twenty pages is not even half! I still struggle with the style and narrative."
"You must let me read it," Twilight pleaded.
"But it's still quite raw and..." Fluttershy tried to refuse but saw Twilight's anticipation. "Ok. But only you. And promise, having read it, you will calm the others, but not tell them anything about the plot. Until I finish it, at least."
"Wow, it turns out there already was a real writer among us! And she is the only one not participating in the competition!" said Rainbow Dash.
"Aha! Gotcha!" said Pinkie Pie, pointing sharply at Rainbow with her hoof. "You said ! That means you're going to participate too! Right?"
Everyone in the library looked with interest at Rainbow Dash and her embarrassed smile.
"I mean, to be honest, this whole idea seemed awfully silly at first. For us to participate in a writer’s contest? Except for Twilight, we're all readers. But now, having listened to you, having listened to the passion with which you describe your stories, it seems to me that something worthwhile can come out of it all. Besides, I just came up with the idea for a awesome story. Picture this. Distant future. A squadron of Equus spaceships is approaching the planet Thea, from an outpost on which a distress signal has been received. But scans from orbit show no signs of life. And the images of the surface revealed that the coordinates of the expeditionary space complex is nothing but a huge black funnel. A funnel that only one weapon in the galaxy could have left. Plasma battleship howitzers. The Reptiloids has returned."
"Cool." said Spike. "Spaceships, plasma weapons, lizards... Just like in the latest issue of the comic, where the heroes fought the aliens!"
"This is not a story about superpowered ponies," Rainbow peered back at Spike. "My story will be about ordinary soldiers defending their home from alien invaders."
"Everyone got their own sources of inspiration," said Twilight. "and I am sure Rainbow will write something epic and original."
"That's awesome!" said Pinkie Pie. "We will write five stories for the competition and another little story that will not participate! And when we finish, we’ll read them to each other! And if one of our stories wins the contest, it will be read by many, many ponies all over Equestria!"
"I am glad it all worked out," said Twilight. "Now, let us not waste any time. It takes only a few minutes to an hour to read a story, but it rarely takes less than a few days of hard work to write one. After all, you need to think through all the plot twists, build the composition of each individual scene, create believable and deep characters, catch errors, check grammar, punctuation, and style... we are in for a very exciting few days."
***
"I don’t get it. I just don’t get what went wrong?" mumbled Twilight. "How come Spike and I were the only ones to finish and send our stories on time?"
The six friends gathered again in the Golden Oaks Library, and five of them looked at their feet.
(Fluttershy did it out of habit).
"I'm sorry, Twilight," said Pinkie Pie. "I always thought there was a lot of time. So I didn't rush myself. Waited for inspiration to come. And after the Pony-without-a-name met Name-without-a-pony in the Gluttony Castle, and they merged into a Pony by the name of Name and No-pony-with-no-name, I think I spiraled into a creative crisis. I didn't understand what No-pony-with-no-name wanted! And I could not raise my hooves to rewrite their fates! After all, Pony and Name were so happy together!"
"Ah' don't understand," said Applejack. "What happened to them raisins?"
"The raisins are fine. They still rain from the sky."
"Why did not you tell me you had a self-organization problem?" Twilight refused to calm down. "I could have explained to you that sitting around, waiting for inspiration is not the best strategy. The real inspiration comes during work. At least that is how it is with me. What about your No-pony-with-no-name... what does it even look like?"
"It doesn't look like anything. It's always, kind of, stands behind you and you can only feel it’s no-look if it's nearby. And you can communicate with him through thoughts, imagining what it would not-say and not-want," Pinkies eyes suddenly opened wide and she said: "That's it! Why didn't I think of that?"
"Well, your failure is understandable. To bring such a story to a suitable ending is not an easy task. But you, Applejack! What difficulties could arise with the classic, clear and consistent plot of "?
"Welp, no particular difficulties have arisen, ah' just got a bit carried away" the farmer smiled sheepishly and adjusted her hat. "On the dangerous path to the dragon's lair, ma' hero suddenly encountered a dense forest, teeming with terrible predators, an old abandoned castle with ghosts, a fetid swamp, where the old witch studied dark magic, and the camp of robbers who stole from the rich and gave to the poor. And ma' hero, who collected a lot of ancient magical trinkets during his adventures, was very rich, you see..."
"You mean," said Twilight, rubbing the bridge of her nose with her hoof, "you combined all of Granny Smith's tales into one. And as a result, the Princess’ main danger is now death from old age."
"Oh, Applejack, I wish I had your talent" Rarity said dramatically. "I wish my characters such a fate! But no matter how hard I try to protect my lovers, even the power of fortune is not limitless."
"Wait a minute Rarity," said Twilight, seeing tears welling in her friend’s eyes. "Are you saying that…"
"They died, Twilight! Died! I couldn't save them! Nothing helped them, not the amulet of invisibility stolen from the mage’s tower, nor constantly napping guards, nor severe disease that almost killed the Minister of Internal Affairs, nor the merit of the valiant bodyguard who thrice averted the king's assassination! They could only save their lives by giving up their love... Why is the world so cruel?!"
Rarity began to cry, and Fluttershy hurried over and hugged her friend.
“I warned you that it would be very difficult to avoid a tragic ending. But this does not mean that it is impossible to work with. We are talking about the dark ages! The time when ponies were ruled by monarchs far removed from ideas of friendship and love! Who knows, maybe a tale about your lovers will spread among the common folk and made them rethink the ways of their lives! Perhaps it was due to your tale that the idea of a United Equestria, a land of harmony - was born!”
"Maybe," squeaked the fashion designer, burying her tear-stained muzzle in Fluttershy's mane. Her sobs faded. "Maybe…"
"Well, I think you know what went wrong with my story," Rainbow Dash said with a sad smile.
"I think I do" sighed Twilight. "For the past couple of weeks, you have been coming to the library almost every day and read books about , , and ."
"Aha. I really wanted to portray the future as probable as I could, more thought through. I've never read so much in my life as I have in these two weeks!"
"And the last book you took was Qinqin's ."
"Aha. And after reading it, I found that my story had one very serious flaw. One very unlikely detail. Reptiloids are idiots. They got a huge number of spaceships of any size and any purpose at their disposal, and they send a single, lone battleship to attack the fortified forces of Equus asteroid belt, allowing the enemy to board it and gain access to secret technologies! They got three-dimensional space to move around, and they stubbornly continue to attack one military base on the planet Psi-41 from the same angle of a Unicorn constellation! Just go around this unfortunate planet and hit the Equus already! And how did they let a cloaked destroyer with a charged MegaSpell slip through to their command flagship... No checkpoints, no escort patrols, not even... what's-the-name… au-then-tifi-cation... Are you came to fight or what? Besides, I suddenly discovered that if you give the Lizards brains... then the ponies won't stand a chance. The alien’s plasma cannons are more powerful, accurate, and long-ranged than our magical counterparts. The armor of their ships, made of an alloy of unknown alien metals, is much stronger than our titanium alloys. And, finally, their mosquito-like small scout ships are far superior in speed and maneuverability then our most nimble destroyers! I just can't think of what kind of sacrifice would have had to be made to win a war like that.”
"No need for more sacrifices," quietly added Fluttershy, still hugging Rarity and stroking her mane.
"Yeah, that's what I thought too, in the end."
There was a knock at the door, and Spike, who sat nearest, opened it and met the postmistress.
"We got mail," He said.
"Wonderful! Twilight perked, walking to the door. "I'm sure that's the letter from Manehattan, with our stories scored."
Accepting two sealed letters and saying goodbye to the postmistress, Twilight handed Spike his letter and opened hers.
But as she read the verdict of the intelligent, educated ponies, Twilight's frown deepened.
"Two on a five-point scale?! The characters lack depth and distinctive features?! The ending feels crumpled? Descriptions of the scientific phenomena of the invented world are given too much time and they do not feel plausible?! Who do they think they are?!"
"The ponies who organized a contest to select only the three best stories?" Spike looked up from his letter. "Don't worry about it. They didn't like my story either. Only two and a half points. They wrote that there is a lack of experience of a novice writer. The text is full of pleonasms and tautologies. . But, it seems, they liked the theme I chose, the elaboration of the characters and their experiences, as well as my ending."
"Two and a half? You mean your story is better than mine?"
"Only according to the jury. Besides, you had to invent a whole world from scratch, and I just watched you try to write your stories and transferred your experiences to my pony-writer. And, frankly, the criticism of your story by these ponies does not seem groundless to me. I often noticed that all of your earth pony scientists felt a little bleak.”
"Not they did not! Endless was obsessed with perpetual motion, Daylight dreamed of spaceships, and Greenhoof's discovery could solve the world hunger forever!"
Little dragon just rolled his eyes, picked up one of Twilight's drafts from her desk, and began to read aloud:
"But despite Daylight's doubts, the scientists have begun the experiment. The electric generator had to cope with the voltage. That's what the thrice tested calculations showed. Endless said as the hum of the generator stopped growing. said Greenhoof, leaning over the digital panel. Daylight said. Endless pulled the red lever, but there was no change in the generator noise. Greenhoof said. Daylight asked. The scientists nodded curtly in reply, and in an orderly manner, without haste or delay, they headed for the exit. The structure of the laboratory was designed for such an outcome, and its walls had to withstand an electric explosion. According to calculations. Thrice checked calculations. But it didn't hurt to be safe."
"That is not fair!" Twilight protested. "You specifically voiced all three in the same emotionless tone!"
"I just read what is written," said Spike, which embarrassed Twilight even more.
"Why did the jury liked your ending so much?" Pinkie asked Spike.
"Well, the letter is pretty vague on that. But, my pony-writer is tired of being forever dissatisfied with the results of his work and decided to learn to write better. And he ends up buying books. Many books. Works of recognized classics, books about different literary styles, books about how to create thoughtful characters and so on."
“And how is that better than preventing global warming?" Twilight sighed sadly.
Her friends and the dragon exchanged eloquent glances.
"Still, joining the writing contest was a great idea." said Rainbow Dash, "In all this mental work, I'd forgotten about the Daring Do’s last book! And now I better understand A.K. Yearling and her desire to end the franchise on a high note. By the way" said Rainbow pulling out an issue of today's , "our Manehattan friends are back in the spotlight. They thank all participants, and discuss the most common mistakes. I think your two points are even higher than average! They also announced the winners. The stories themselves are not here - we will have to wait for the book release - but there is the name of the author, the title, some hoofnotes and the comment of the jury, what exactly hooked them in."
Rainbow passed the paper to Twilight, who read it with interest.
The first place went to somepony named Sunny Skies for a story called "The End".
Twilight looked out the window and pondered.
The rays of the setting sun slid across the roofs of the town preparing for sleep. Another beautiful day was coming to an end. Just like the countless days before it.
And who knows what wonderful stories tomorrow's dawn will bring.
