Sour

by Frizzy

Rating: mature
Tags: Sex, Limestone Pie, Human, Anon, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Second Person, Comedy, Romance, Porn
Length: 3058

You and Limestone Pie settle your differences.

You are Equestria's sole human, working on a rock farm. The owners of said rock farm have almost become like your family: Igneous is a stern, but fair, father figure. Cloudy Quartz is a steadfast matriarch. Marble is like an innocent little sister. Limestone is a fucking bitch.

Featured 12/9/2019

Published 2019-12-09 05:50:01 UTC
Last updated 2019-12-09 05:50:01 UTC

A Bitch and Her Dummy

You laid back on the softest bed in existence, drinking a beer. On your right sat the Princess of the Sun herself, Princess Celestia, who lovingly caressed your bare chest with a stocking clad hoof. On your left was her sister, Princess of the Night, Luna, who excitedly peppered your face with nonstop kisses. Meanwhile, Cadence, the Princess of Love, massaged your feet, while her sister-in-law, Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Friendship, levitated a bit of cake to your mouth, which you gladly accepted.

"Oh, Anon," Celestia purred, nibbling your ear. "It is so lovely to be able to spend a night having the most amazing sex with the sexiest, most hadsomest man in all of Equestria!"

"Tis, indeed," Luna agreed. "More beer, milord?" she offered, cracking the top off another bottle.

"Of course, my dear," you replied, taking the cold beverage from her blue magic.

"I am so glad that I am cucking my stupid husband in favor of a much more desirable male," Cadence said, moving her hooves from your feet to begin work on your calves. "My, I have already forgotten his name. It was probably something stupid."

"His name is Shining Armor," Twilight said, breaking off another piece of cake and levitating it to your mouth. "Not that it matters, anymore. Anonymous shall make a much better father to Flurry Heart than my dorky brother ever was."

"That we can agree on," Cadence said, before turning to you. "Speaking of daddies, shall we go for round number twenty-seven? Perhaps you can get all four of us nice and pregnant with many human babies?"

"Oh, can we? Please?" Luna pleaded.

"Oh, yes, will you knock up all of the royalty in Equestria, Anon?" Celestia begged. "We exist solely to carry your babies and provide you with mind blowing sex!"

"Of course, babes," you said, downing the rest of your beer. You pulled your harem in, closer. "So, who first?"

"Why not all of us at once?" Twilight asked. "You have proven time and time again that you posses the sexual prowess to please ten mares at the same time."

"Oh yes, of course," you laughed.

"There's just one thing we have to ask of you, beforehand," Celestia said.

"And what's that?"

"WAKE UP, DUMMY!"

You were promptly knocked out of your uncomfortable bed onto the cold, hard, wooden floor. Limestone Pie glared down at you. "Get dressed and come downstairs. we're working in the south fields today, so hurry up and get dressed. Breakfast is waiting downstairs."

"All right, all right, you sour bitch," you grumble, picking yourself up.

That's right, you worked on some stupid rock farm and did not have a royal harem of the most powerful mares in Equestria. Instead, you had the Pie family, who had graciously taken you in after your sudden appearance in the middle of a blizzard. A few months had passed since then and you now worked for them, in exchange for room and board. You loved them all almost like a family, even with the intense workload and strange family values were a bit difficult to adjust to.

Pulling on your pants, boots, and a t-shirt, you trudged downstairs, wishing you could go back to your dream and enjoy the Royal Sex Pile. Cloudy Quartz was busy at the stove, serving up pebble porridge, which wasn't nearly as bad as you had expected, minus the rocks. The two of you shared a friendly smile as she poured you a bowl of your breakfast. Limestone already had her muzzle buried into her bowl, messily devouring her meal. Marble had a much better sense of of table manners, opting to eat her porridge with a spoon. The two of you exchanged a nod and a smile as you spooned the rocks from your breakfast into her bowl.

A belch interrupted your typical morning ritual. Limestone had finished her breakfast and was wiping stray bits of food from her face with the back of her hoof. "Hurry up," she barked. "The sooner we get started, the sooner we finish, and I definitely don't want to be out there all day. Pegasi said they had a huge rain storm planned for around one, and if we get caught in that, I swear, I'll shove my hoof so far up your-"

"Language, young filly," Cloudy chastised.

"Sorry, Ma," Limestone said, standing up. She turned back to you. "I'm serious, though. I better see your weird hand things being put to good use in ten minutes, or you'll regret it," she said before walking out the door.

"Was she always that bossy?" you ask Marble for probably the fifteenth time.

"Mhmm."

...

"I told you we didn't have any time to waste!" Limestone shouted at you as you and Marble filled a cart with a rather meager assortment of rocks, minerals, and gemstones. The rain was coming down hard now, completely drenching the three of you. The ground had been rendered a slick, slippery mess, making working conditions incredibly unsafe, forcing you to stop for the day.

"Um, can't we all just get along?" Marble asked, hesitantly.

"Well, how the fuck was I supposed to know that the rain would start four hours earlier than expected?!" you shouted, ignoring Marble's plea.

"Whatever, dummy," Limestone grumbled. "Let's just get these over to the storage shed, then head inside. We can argue about this when we're dry."

The door to the shed creaked open as you pushed the cart inside. Quickly lighting up a lamp, you began to sort today's haul into the proper bins. Neither you nor Limestone said a word to each other, instead opting to silently fume.

"What the hell are you doing?" Limestone barked, breaking the silence, as you threw a large ruby into the appropriately marked bin.

"Sorting the harvest," you reply, coldly, not even looking up from your work. "What the fuck does it look like I'm doing?"

Limestone snorted. "You're doing an awful job!" she growled, removing the ruby from its bin. "This is clearly a red diamond, dummy!" she continued, tossing it into the bin marked "DIAMOND". "And you put graphite in the goethite bin, too!"

"You're clearly blind!" you snapped back. "Obviously that is goethite and that is a ruby!"

"I'm sorry," she snorted, sarcastically, take a hostile step toward you. "I forgot you had a cutie mark for identifying rocks and minerals!"

"Please, you two," Marble whimpered. "There's no need to fight. Anon just made an honest mist-"

"You know damn well I don't have a cutie mark, you racist bitch!" You interrupted, likewise moving toward Limestone.

"Well, if you did, you'd have one for being a big dummy!" Limestone yelled, closing the gap between you.

"Well, maybe you should have one for being a cun-"

A slam and a click derailed your counter-point. Both of you turned in the direction of the commotion, noticing that Marble was missing. Limestone trotted over the door, trying and failing to open it, before noticing a scrap of paper on the floor. "That conniving little..." she muttered, reading the note.

"What?" you grumbled, snatching the paper from the gray, bitch-pony's hoof. "All you two ever do is fight," you read aloud. "It has gone on for far too long. Lunch is at noon, I will unlock the door then. In the mean time, please work out your differences." You crumple up the note and toss it aside. "All right then. So do you want to talk first or can-"

WHAM!

You staggered back, clutching your cheek where Limestone had punched you. For a pony that only came up to your waist, she sure was able to reach. "Fighting works, too," you say, charging forward, catching the mare in a tackle, pinning her to the ground. Small as she is, she has no trouble reversing the situation, easily flipping the two of you over, and delivering two more punches to the face. A well placed knee to the stomach gets her off of you, quickly followed by a quick kick while she's down.

The two of you pummel each other in a blinding rage.

A bite to your shoulder.

A jab to her ribs.

A kick to your shin.

A slap to her face.

Your lips mashed together in a chaste, angry kiss. You hastily shove each other away, shooting your foe a look of disgust for having the audacity to kiss you, which she reciprocated. "Fucking gross!" you shouted, wiping pony spit from your lips. "I can't believe you just did that!"

"What the fuck are you talking about?!" your opponent roared, spitting away the taste of your mouth. "You're the one who kissed me, you pervert!" She punched you in the stomach again.

You pulled her ear.

She punched you in the chest.

You punched her in the face.

She stomped on your foot.

You slammed her against a wall.

The two of you shoved your tongues down each others' throats.

She shoved you to the floor.

You slapped her supple ass.

She bit your neck.

You pulled her mane as you kissed a third time.

You both paused, panting, a string of spit connecting your lips. She had you pinned to the dirt floor. You stared into her eyes. Anger clouded over by lust shimmered back at you. She quickly caught you in another kiss. This time, you let your hands gently run along her face, admiring the soft texture of her fur. Time seemed to stand still. How long had your lips been locked? A moment? Ten seconds? Five minutes? An Hour? A thousand years? All of that was irrelevant. All you knew was that you did not want this kiss to end.

When the two of you finally drifted apart, you stared wordlessly at each other, merely cupping her face in your hands, while she rubbed your chest with a hoof. "What was-?" you start to ask, but are quickly silenced by a hoof gently pressing against your lips.

"Don't say anything," she grunted. She pushed herself off of you, causing you to let out a whine of protest. She took a step away from you, turned around, and bent over. Her tail flagged high in the air, exposing her wet pussy to the cold air. "Just fuck me," she whispered, turning her head back to face you, her cheeks giving off a noticeable scarlet hue. "A none of that foreplay crap, either," she added. "I think we've already done enough of that. Just... just shove it inside me."

You crawled over to where she was waiting. You softly let your fingers glide along her cutie mark, eliciting a threatening grunt of annoyance from her. Taking the hint, you unzipped your pants, letting your erection bob free. You rubbed the tip against her entrance, relishing the warmth her wet folds radiated in the otherwise cold room. You slid the tip inside, before pulling it back out. You reinserted your cock, going just a few millimeters further, before removing yourself from her tight confines.

"Dummy," Limestone growled. "If you don't stop teasing me, I swear to Celestia, I will knock you out and take care of this, myself."

"Really?" you chuckled, lining yourself back up with her dripping snatch, sliding your glans along her entrance, not quite slipping inside, intentionally pissing her off. "I might just like that, whore."

"Pervert," she grunted. "You get off on the idea of being some mare's bitch?"

"Maybe," you said. With a single thrust, you allowed Limestone's warm pussy to completely envelope your throbbing cock. You groaned at her tightness, while she gasped in pleasure. You pulled out, leaving only your glans inside, before thrusting back inside. "But I get off more on the idea of putting a stuck up cunt, like you, in her place." You thrust back in, harder this time, punctuating it with a sharp slap to her flank. Her pussy excitedly constricted around your cock as you did this. You slapped her opposite flank, her cunt tightening, again, in response. "Seems like you like that, too, bitch," you growled, grabbing hold of her mane, and yanking her head back.

She looked up at you, lust and submission glimmering in her eyes. A line of drool rolled from her mouth and down her throat. You catch her in another kiss, this time hungrier, almost ravenous. You drag the tips of your fingers along her back before grabbing hold of her throat. Squeezing lightly, she moans into your mouth as you cut off some of her oxygen. Her cunt spasms, excitedly, spraying a small bit of marecum around your cock and onto the dirt floor.

Taking that a sign to go further, you squeeze again, harder this time. Her eyes roll back into her head as she screams. Her pussy constricted manically around your thrusting member. She pushed back into you, not allowing you to pull out as she quivered in pleasure. Suddenly, your cock became hotter, wetter, as her voice started to trail off. Her snatch tightened one last time, almost painfully, as a rush of her cum exploded from around your erection lodged firmly inside of her. One spurt. Two spurts. Three. Four. Then, she slumped over, spent, your cock sliding out with a wet pop.

"So, you liked that, slut?" you whispered, leaning over her, and planting a quick kiss on her cheek.

"Sh-shut up!" she panted, laying in a puddle of her own excitement.

"Yeah, you fucking loved it, you dirty tramp!" you sneered. You gave her rump a firm slap, admiring the way the fatty flesh jiggled and bounced. "You know, for a pony who tries to be a tough, badass bitch all the time, you sure do turn into a submissive little slut in the heat of passion," you laugh.

Your moment of humor was cut short when you suddenly had the wind knocked out of you. You found yourself lying flat on your back, staring up at one pissed off gray mare.

"Submissive, huh?" she inquired, her face mere inches from your own. Her back hoof carefully rubbed against the length of your still hard member. You groan in agonizing pleasure, remembering that you still haven't had your release, yet. "I'll show you fucking submissive, jackass!"

You both hiss as her tight cunt enveloped your cock, once more. After taking a moment to adjust herself, she raised her flank and slammed herself back down, grunting as she forced your length deep inside her tight, wet snatch. She leaned down, giving you a quick kiss on your lips, before moving down lower, and biting down hard on your neck. As you screamed out, the pain was quickly soothed by a gentle kiss to the developing bruise.

"See, dummy," Limestone grunted, bouncing up and down on your cock. "I can be both mean and nice," she said, kissing the bite mark, once more. "Now, whether you get sweet or sour Limestone is entirely up to you." She hilted herself on your erection, gyrating her hips. "Got it?" You nodded and moaned, your mind incapable of forming words. Limestone smirked and planted another kiss on your cheek. "Good bitch."

Your newfound mistress raised herself up until only your tip remained inside. Opting to let gravity do most of the work, she let herself fall back down, a wet slap reverberating around the room as your hips met. She grunted, letting herself rest a moment, before rising back up and falling back down, again. She developed a rhythm, each drop being punctuated with a grunt from one of you, usually both.

Limestone's thrusts quickened, her breath coming out in short gasps. You were in a similar state, your peak approaching, fast. You reached up and grabbed hold of her firm flanks, squeezing them, kneading the supple flesh, and pushing yourself deeper inside, increasing the pace of your lovemaking.

"L-lime!" you gasped. "I'm close!"

"Me too, dummy!" the pony moaned, pushing her hips as hard and fast as she could. "Don't you fucking dare finish without me!"

Needing one more push to finish you both off, you delivered a firm swat to her ass. Limestone growled. "What did I tell you about being nice?" she asked, doubling her efforts. She leaned forward and bit your nipple.

You pulled her mane.

She choked you.

You spanked her ass.

She slapped you in the face.

"Limestone!"

"Dummy!"

You both came in white hot pleasure.

Your cock pulsed with each shot of cum you pumped into her tight, pony pussy. She gyrated her hips, trying to milk even more of your seed from you. You pulled together in a passionate kiss, riding out the end of your orgasms for as long as possible.

As you both came down from your sex induced highs, your lips parted, a string of spit connecting the two of you. You smiled at each other. You met for one more quick kiss, before Limestone laid down on top of you, resting her head against your chest. Neither of you said anything, choosing to instead enjoy the post-orgasmic cuddling, listening to each other breathing, softly.

A few minutes passed before either of you moved. You checked your watch. 10:42. "We still got about another hour before Marble lets us out," you said. "You up for another round?"

"Of what? Fighting or fucking?" she asked with laugh.

"I dunno," you replied with a smirk. "I'm down for either."

...

Marble, Cloudy Quartz, and Igneous stared in disbelief at Anon and Limestone, their sandwiches forgotten. To say something wasn't quite right would be an understatement. No, something was very wrong.

Anon and Limestone were both covered in bruises, black eyes, and bite marks, and Anon's shirt was in tatters. That wasn't too unexpected. Hell, it had only been a matter of time before the two of them came to blows. What was concerning was that the two of them were being friendly towards one another, sitting next to each other, and very close at that. They were sharing the occasional smile with each other and having a conversation that wasn't laced with threats of knocking teeth out.

Something had happened in the shed and none of the Pies were quite sure if they wanted to know what.

Author's Note

That was the actual Luna during Anon's dream.