Arms flailing wildly You careen down the steeply slanted rooftop at breakneck speed, as you race to your doom on the hard cobble stones below. You desperately reach out for anything to slow your fall, But the dew coated roof tiles prove much to slippery to find any purchase. You look down as the edge of the rooftop rapidly approaches and notice the silvery moonlight reflecting off the edge of a rain gutter. You firmly plant your feet in an attempt to arrest your speedy descent and preserve your rapidly shrinking lifespan.

Your heels catch on the thin metal of the rain gutter. With adrenaline coursing through your veins you clutch a hand to your chest in a desperate attempt to slow your racing heartbeat.

Now would be a great time for your life to flash before your eyes but you realy don't have time for a flashback right now, As the silence of the midnight air is shattered by a faint "pop!"

"Pop!"

"pop!"

The rivets securing the thin metal rain gutter shear off and bounce against the wall on the opposite side of the narrow city street.
As the dislodged rain gutter falls down to the street below with a loud clatter, And you slowly slide over the edge of the slippery rooftop.

Falling uncontrollably through the air, You catch yourself on a clothesline stretched tightly between two buildings.
Dangling helplessly several feet above the street below, You carefully consider your now very limited options when out of the corner of your eye you notice an innocent mare taking a bath in the privacy of her own home.
You tried not to look... you honestly did... but it kind of just happened.
And then, your eyes met.

Shocked at having a grown man in tight leather pants fall from the sky to peep on her in the most private of all places, she lets out a shrill shriek as she rips her shower curtain free to cover herself, She wastes no time at all throwing any thing within her reach at the peeping pervert.

As a shampoo bottle whizzes dangerously close to your head as you let go of the clothesline and free fall the rest of the way to the street below.
Landing safely in a conveniently placed wagonfull of hay, You ~~kiss the ground repeatedly just happy to be reunited with good old tera firma~~ brush the hay from your clothes, And slip into a dark alleyway to avoid the city guards that will no doubt be attracted to the sound of the chaos that you left in the wake of your carelessness.

Under the cover of darkness you carefully navigate the winding city streets while dodging the ever increasing guard patrols until you finally come to the heavily guarded palace gates.

After a few moments of preparation, You steel yourself for what you're about to do next.

Boldly walking up to the Gaurdponys you slap one across the muzzle and shout, "Your mother was a two bit whorse!" before running down the dark alleyway like your life depended on it, Because quite frankly it did.

After a brief moment of shocked silence the assaulted guardpony shouted, "Get that fool!" As they all rushed down the dark alleyway in hot pursuit of their cloaked assailant.

You fling yourself against the wall as the furious Guardponys rush past you, Stumbling over the trip wire and sliding across the greased cobble stones landing in a tangled heap at the end of the alleyway.

"Sorry fellas but I can't have you following me" You tell the tangled mess of Gaurdponys as you empty a trashcan on top of them.

Slipping through the palace gates, You wander the dark corridors in absolute silence, like a ravenous wolf stalking your helpless prey. You slip though the empty hallway and up a flight of stairs higher and higher you climb. The palace unfolding before you like an endless labyrinth in the inky black of the midnight hour.

It was a warm and sunny day in Canterlot, As you and Griddle stood in line for Princess Celestias day court.
Griddle needed to see the Princess in order to renew his restaurant permit and he insisted that you came along too.

"You look like you could use a change in scenery, and everypony should see Canterlot at least once in their lifetime." He had told you.

But you were pretty sure that the thought of leaving you unsupervised in his beloved restaurant terrified the living daylights out of him.

You realy didn't mind anyway, you and Griddle went way back, And you enjoyed the middle-aged stallion's company.

A Royal Guard opened the doors to the throne room and instructed everypony to find a seat as the Princess will be ariving shortly.

Large crowds made you feel uneasy and the throne room was packed with ponys that needed to see their beloved ruler for one reason or another.

You nudged Griddle with an elbow and told him you were stepping out for some fresh air he silently nodded in understanding as you waded through the sea of ponys towards the exit.

You briefly wandered the palace corridors before hearing the frantic clatter of hooves, rounding the corner Princess Celestia rushed towards you at full gallop, a slice of buttered toast hanging from her mouth flopping up and down with each step as she ran.

She noticed you to late to stop as the two of you collided with a bone jarring crash!

The sheer force of the impact sent you flying through the air before bouncing unceremoniously off the hard marble floor.

You faded in and out of consciousness, Blood dripping from your head and your limbs splayed out in strange angles
The smell of crunchy toast was overpowering as you looked down and tried to peel it of your chest, but you stupid arm wouldn't move.

"How dare you betray me...., arm!"

Princess Celestia wrapped her wings around you and held you close to her warm body, As tears slowly dripped down her soft cheeks.

As the world blead in and out of focus, You stared into her warm magenta eyes, Her lips moving, Calling out in a voice you couldn't hear over the ringing in your ears. If only you could reach those soft lips you thought to yourself, then you could die a happy man.

Author's Note

Who was the mare in the shower? I'm thinking Twilights mom, But I want to know who you want it to be