Author's Note
Commissioned by Alexwarlorn
Inspired by Magpiepony's Pinkie Tales series. Please support the official release.
A fun commission from Alexwarlorn. I really liked writing this and based off the fairy tale of Godfather Death.
The Only Chapter
“Hi Pumpkin! Hi Pound! Are you ready for your story?!” Pinkie Pie asked, standing over the open storybook with the two tiny foals huddled close to her. The twins giggled and clapped. “Today's story will be about a pony getting a new godparent! Oh! I wonder if it will be a nice little fairy! And we have a special guest tonight!”
“Greetings,” said Princess Luna, the night Princess giving a smile as she trotted over, her sister presently buying week's supply of royal cake downstairs (baking would take awhile). “This story holds personal meaning to me, so I volunteered to help tell it tonight, little ones.”
The two foals happily giggled, hugging the Princess as she laid down next to them.
There once was a poor stallion named Nightlight who worked on a small, bleak little farm surrounded by his 12 children, all crying for food or the older ones working themselves just as hard. All dressed in tattered rags.
“Really?” Pinkie asked, interrupting the story and causing time to freeze within it as she appeared. “That's who we're going with?”
Sorry, there aren't many options for fathers. We'd have had Big Macintosh due to how big his family is but this role has too many lines.
“...That's fair...”
“Wait, Pinkie Pie, who is this?” Luna questioned, appearing next to her.
“He's the narrator!” Pinkie replied cheerfully.
“Narrator?”
I am the omniscient entity who will be reading the story tonight.
“This reading of stories is far more complicated than I expected.”
“What's omniscient mean?” questioned Pinkie Pie with a raised eyebrow.
It means I know everything within this story, so I can tell it properly.
“Oh! Okay!”
May I continue?
“Sure!”
Finally, the father's thirteenth child came into the world...
Spike gave a sigh and his eyes narrowed a glare, wrapped in a blanket and in Twilight Velvet's hooves. “Really?”
You don't spend that long as a baby Spike.
“Fine...”
“I think you look adorable, Spike! I haven't held you like this in years!” replied Twilight Velvet with a motherly smile, causing the little drake to blush.
“At least you get to be a main character!” Diamond Tiara, one of the other twelve, grumbled indignantly. “I wanted to be the Princess!”
Not knowing what to do in his need, Nightlight ran out into the road. “I can't do this alone, I will pick see if the first pony I meet on this road will be my son's godparent...and I brought this in case it's a highway stallion, can never be too careful in the middle ages...” he said, producing a frying pan.
“Wait wait wait!” Pinkie Pie said, pausing the story as she popped in. “Why would somepony make just anypony their kid's godparent?! Isn't that a really important job?!”
“Don't be too hard on him, Pinkie Pie,” replied Luna, understandingly. “He's desperate and has no choice.”
Luna's right, Pinkie Pie, he's desperate for help and doesn't have anywhere to turn.
“I guess that makes sense...”
Nightlight continued down the highway, looking for the first passer by.
The first pony to cross the poor pony's path was our dear Mother Celestia, who descended in a radiant, shining light and landed before the stallion.
“Aren't you going to give everypony funny name puns?” Pinkie Pie questioned.
Mother Celestia is a pun.
“It is?”
“I get the joke! Well done strange narrator!” Luna replied with a chuckle.
Thanks, this story doesn't have a lot of names...
“I still don't get it...” Pinkie replied.
“Poor stallion, I pity you. I will care for your young...drake, and make him happy on the earth,” the radiant being said with compassion in her voice.
“Who are you?” the stallion asked, clearly resisting the subconscious desire to bow.
“I am Celestia.”
Nightlight gulped and sweated. “Then I do not wish to have you for a godmother, you...uh, give to the rich and let the poor starve...” he said aloud. “Please don't banish me, Princess! Or imprison me! Or imprison me in the place you banished me to! I'm just following the story!” he whispered under his breath.
Celestia gave a chuckle. “It's alright,” she said, for she understood he did not know the whole picture or how the righteous are rewarded in the next life.
“Wait wait wait! That's not what Celestia does!” Pinkie Pie interrupted.
That's the point, Pinkie Pie.
“Oh...”
“Yes, it is sadly common for mortals to try and blame the divine for all the world's ills,” Luna muttered.
Celestia departed, looking disappointed.
Then, as the father headed further down the road, Devilcord came to him and said, “...Really? Oh come on now! This is typecasting!”
Sorry, Discord, but Tirek's sentence prevents him from being within miles of...anyone who's not a Tartarus inmate for the next few thousand years.
“Fine then...” the Spirit of Chaos muttered then cleared his throat and snapped his fingers, re-manifesting with an maniacal laugh in a pillar of plaid colored fire with devil horns and a pitchfork in claw...with a hot dog stuck to the tip. “Hello there, little pony! If you make me your little drake's godfather, I'll give him all the toys, candy, and chocolate rain he could ever want!”
“Who are you?” Nightlight asked.
“I am Devilcord!” said the Draconequus, giving his most charismatic, but still slimy tone. “Lord of Chaos, warden of the condemned, nice to meet ya.”
“Then I do not want you to be his godfather!” the stallion replied. “You deceive ponykind and lead them astray!...Also, too much candy and chocolate will rot his teeth, and as a father I can't allow that!”
Devilcord snarled in rage and vanished in a pillar of plaid fire...then reappeared off to the side and bowed theatrically as copies of himself threw flowers at him and applauded. “Thank you, thank you! You've been a wonderful audience!”
Yes...thank you, Devilcord...
“You are welcome for my very existence.”
After Devilcord's departure, a third figure slowly approached. Coming on withered legs, was the frightening form of Deathmare Moon.
…
…
…
Uh, I said Deathmare Moon.
“Oh, right, I forgot!” replied the Princess of the Moon, vanishing in a teleportation spell.
Deathmare Moon slowly approached, long cloak covering her form and scythe in hoof, skeletal visage gazing out.
“Wait wait wait! Death?!” asked Pinkie Pie, pausing the story. “I mean we've touched on it in a few stories, but isn't that a bit much for foals?!”
“Pinkie Pie, this is the entire point of the story!” Deathmare Moon replied, popping out of the frozen story and looking to the pink mare.
“Couldn't we just make it still Nightmare Moon and make her give nightmares instead?” Pinkie Pie questioned.
“That would ruin the entire motivation of the father for his choice...speaking of which...” Deathmare Moon replied, popping back into the story. “Take us as thy son's godmother,” she said simply.
“Who are you?” Nightlight asked, once more struggling not to bow.
“We are Deathmare Moon. Who makes everypony equal,” the reaper said, presenting a fair, but regal persona.
“Then you're the right one. You take away rich and poor without distinction...plus the person who's met everypony in history would probably be a wonderful tutor,” Nightlight replied. “You will be my child's godmother.”
The Deathmare was pleased and nodded. “We will make your child rich and famous, for he who has us for a friend cannot fail.”
“Wait, so Death isn't like the others who just pop in the story and leave?!” interrupted Pinkie Pie, looking disturbed. “Can we please tell another story?”
Sorry, Pinkie Pie, we're both on contract.
“...Curse you lawyers!”
“I fail to see the problem,” Deathmare Moon replied, looking indignant. “This is a classic fairy-tale that has long been ignored!”
“But it's not filly friendly!”
“It was when I was a filly!”
So, continuing on...
After the young drake came of age, his godmother would finally appear to him.
Spike, now dressed in adult attire, stood in the field working as his family always had. “...At least I'm not a baby anymore...” he muttered before jumping with a scream as Deathmare Moon manifested in a pillar of darkness.
“Do not be afraid, our child. We art thy godmother, as per thy father's wishes. Follow me.”
Deathmare Moon lead Spike into a deep, dark forest and presented a herb to him. “Thou shall now receive thy godmother's gift. We shall turn thou into a famous physician. Whenever thou are called to a sick pony, we shall appear to thou and only thou. If we stand at the sick pony's head, you may say with confidence that-”
Uh, Luna. I know you want to keep authenticity, but repeating word for word is kind of a bit much.
“Why?”
Because we're still telling this story to foals who...lack your vocabulary and attention span.
“Oh...yes...we see thy point, even if we'd prefer a straight reading...If we stand at the sick pony's head, give them the herb and they will be well again. But if we stand at their hind hooves, they belong to us! And thou must say they are beyond the help of thou or any other doctor in the world!” Deathmare Moon announced dramatically, lightning flashing behind her theatrically as Spike trembled before her.
“AH!”
“How was that, mysterious narrator?”
Good but...kind of loud...
“...Oh...this is more complicated than I expected...”
“So by 'be mine' she means they're the pony she wants as her special somepony, right?” Pinkie Pie interrupted.
“No, it means they die,” Deathmare replied bluntly.
“...Can't we just use 'never heard from again?'” the pink mare asked in response.
“Why must we talk around such things? It is only a word.”
“Because we're telling a story to foals!”
Anyway, continuing the story...again...
“W-Why do I want to be a doctor?” Spike asked, still trembling.
“Because thy will be rich and famous beyond your wildest dreams,” said his godmother, showing some measure of kindness to her godchild.
The little drake gave a smirk. “Now we're talking...”
“But be warned, our godchild,” said Deathmare Moon, sternly. “Do not use this herb against our will, or there will be consequences...”
“Deal, I promise!”
Under the instruction of his godmother, the young drake would indeed become a great physician, the most famous in all the land. In exchange he kept her warning and his promise close to his heart. When Deathmare Moon appeared at the head of his patient's bed, he would save their lives with his Godmother's herb.
Spike stood beside Granny Smith's bed, giving a gulp as she looked at Applejack and the rest of the family as they surrounded the bed worriedly. He gave a relieved sigh as Deathmare Moon appeared at the head of the bed and gave the old mare the herb made into tea.
“Haha! Death ain't gettin' this old mare yet!” Granny Smith cheered, doing a waltz as she jumped out of bed.
But when Deathmare Moon appeared at the foot of their bed, young Dr. Spike had no choice but to announce they could not be saved.
Spike stood next to Trixie in bed, Starlight Glimmer at the bed side. Looking down, he saw Deathmare Moon manifest at the rearhoof of the bed.
“Uh...sorry...there's nothing I can do...No one else either...” said the young doctor, sweating nervously.
“Wait, Trixie dies?!” Trixie asked indignantly. She then gave a sigh. “Well Trixie will at least die a death worthy of her!” she said, and then began to cough weakly, looking dramaitcally frail. “Starlight! Always remember Trixie as she was! As your best friend! Never forget Trixie!”
Starlight sighed. “...You're unforgettable.”
“And thou art ours,” said Deathmare Moon, neither sadistically or with passion, merely stating a fact. “Trixie Lulamoon, we have come for thee!” she announced, pulling out her scythe and preparing to swing it as Spike's eyes widened.
“Wait wait wait!” Pinkie Pie yelled, pausing the story.
What is it, Pinkie?
“We can't show this part! Can't we just...you know, fade to black?”
“But this story isn't supposed to pull punches regarding death!” Luna replied, still holding the scythe in preparation.
Luna, I think it might actually save dramatic tension if we save showing the actual death for later, if you remember the part I mean.
The Deathmare sighed. “Fine...”
“Thank you!” Pinkie Pie yelled, smiling widely.
“Wait, so Trixie's death is not considered important enough to happen on screen?!” Trixie shouted, turning her nose up indignantly with a huff as everything faded to black.
Under the guidance of his Godmother Deathmare, Spike became rich and famous...
With a roar, Spike erupted through the roof of his house as a fully grown dragon.
Perhaps a little too rich...
“Now, Spike!” Godmother Deathmare called, appearing beside his head and grabbing his ear like a disapproving parent. “You know better! Snap out of it!”
The dragon quickly reverted to his small self and hung onto her due to the height. “Yikes, thanks...”
“We art thy godmother after all, allowing our charge to go on a rampage would not be proper,” the reaper replied with a smile.
This all continued until the king of the land fell terribly ill.
Hondo Flanks laid in bed, a hot water bottle on his head and crown on top of that, groaning and looking feverish. His queen Cookie Crumbles entered the room with a covered bowl. “Oh, are we going to have chicken noodle soup?”
“No, hon, that hasn't been invented yet. So we're just going to go with a leech treatment...” replied the mare as her husband's eyes widened as she took the cover off.
Outside the castle, Spike looked up as the King's knights lead him to the castle...and jumped as he heard Hondo's screaming. “...Uh...I think I get why you called me...”
“Ew! Why would anypony use leeches on a sick pony?! Are they crazy?!” Pinkie Pie asked, popping up and looking green in the face.
Oh they used to be considered a valid, often used medical practice.
“Wait, it isn't anymore?” asked Deathmare Moon, looking confused.
Well, they are still used, just in very specific situations...Uh...moving on before Pinkie throws up...Nothing they tried helped, so Dr. Spike was summoned to see if he could be saved.
The little drake cringed, looking at the king covered in leeches. “So, what do you think doc?...Please don't prescribe more leeches...”
Dr. Spike had always liked the king, he'd been a good ruler...that and getting in his good graces could've been a major boon for him...
“Please save my daddy, Dr. Spike...” said Princess Sweetie Belle, looking at Spike with puppy dog eyes.
Dr. Spike looked for his Godmother out of the corner of his eye...and found her waiting at the rear hoof of the bed, ready claim the king. He looked back and fourth between the Deathmare and the puppy-dog eyed foal.
The drake knew his godmother would be angry if he went back on their agreement. She'd done so much for him and had to have her reasons for that rule had to be followed...but surely his Godmother would look the other way just this once...
“...Hey! Look! A vulture!” Dr. Spike yelled, pointing out the window.
“Oh! Where?! I love vultures, they're so cute!” Deathmare cried excitedly, rushing to the window.
Dr. Spike quickly spun King Hondo around so his head was now at the foot of the bed where Deathmare had been.
“What's this about doc?”
“Uh...it's part of the treatment,” Dr. Spike replied with a nervous smile.
“Oh...alright then. Way better than the leeches...also, can you please take them off? I'm starting to feel lightheaded...”
“There was no vulture out there and...” Godmother Deathmare Moon stated, slowly walking over...to find out what happened. “...Dang it, we fell for literally the oldest trick in the book...”
As Deathmare now stood at the King's head, the doctor made up the herb and gave it to him, curing him.
“Yay! No more leeches!” Hondo yelled...then screamed at one on his leg and flicked it away.
Princess Sweetie Belle instantly hug tackled the Doctor. “Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!”
The little dragon blushed. “Well I wished Rarity had been the Princess, but this is nice...”
The Doctor was quite proud of himself and once he'd received his payment, left the palace...only find his Godmother standing before him, face dark and angry...but also disappointed.
“Thou hath betrayed us!” the Deathmare yelled, voice cracking slightly as she spoke...then slowly settled, looking at him and steadying herself. “...Thou art our godson, so just this once we will overlook it, but do it again and there shall be grave consequences we do not wish to have to bestow.”
“...I...I don't blame her for being angry...he did break a promise...” Pinkie said, pinning her ears as she popped up. “But he saved the King! That should be a good thing!”
“Pinkie! The entire point of this story is to teach a moral about death's inevitability!” Luna replied, the two beginning to glare at each other.
Continuing on...once again...for the third time...
The young doctor continued to do his work, heeding his Godmother's warning not to trick her once again...
That is until the royal Princess fell gravely ill.
Sweetie Belle laid in her bed, looking as if she was on death's door. Her mother sobbed at her bedside and her father cried until his eyes began to go blind.
“How dark is this story going to get?!” asked Pinkie Pie, mane and tail starting to go straight.
“It is merely a reflection of how sincerely and deep his grieving is! It isn't like how in the original tale of 'Raponyzel' the witch gouged the Prince's eyes out with thorns!” Luna replied.
“...I didn't need to know that...but this is a story for foals!”
“Yes, and sugarcoating things isn't always what foals need!”
Fine, the stallion was crying so hard he could go blind if he kept going much longer, is that better?
“...I guess...” both mares said with a grumble.
“I declare if anypony in the kingdom can cure my daughter may marry her and become heir to my throne!” King Hondo announced. “Which incidentally means I not only save my daughter but potentially get grandchildren, which is an all around win.”
Thus Dr. Spike was once more summoned to the castle.
“No way Deathmare will be at the hind hoof of her bed this time, this is my chance to become king!” Spike said with a smile, walking into the room...to find Deathmare not at the head of the bed.
He gulped, looking down to the hind hoof of the bed where his godmother stood...looking sad, regretful.
The drake remembered his Godmother's warnings, and knew he should heed them...
“...But I could become king...” he said, blushing slightly at the idea of marrying Princess Sweetie Belle. He looked between Deathmare and the sick girl, then to her sad, expectant parents, then back to Deathmare.
He sweated heavily, wondering if there was a third option. “Uh...look, a vulture!”
Deathmare didn't turn away, merely narrowing her eyes.
A vulture at the window pouted and departed sadly, leaving only the Doctor facing down his Godmother.
“And then he convinces his Godmother to leave her alone and that it's mean to make ponies never heard from again?” Pinkie Pie interrupted to ask.
“That would be missing the point!” Luna replied.
“But stories should have a happy ending!”
“Not all stories have happy endings!”
“Well they should!”
“Maybe so, but shielding children from the fact they don't solves nothing!”
Uh, girls...
“Why are you making everything so gloomy?!”
“Why can't you just let this story be told as it was without reducing it to mere words without substance?!”
Girls...
“WHY CAN'T WE JUST TELL THE STORY THE WAY I WANT TO?!”
The Cake Twins burst out crying and sobbing loudly.
“Look what you did, you made the twins cry!” Pinkie Pie yelled, rocking the two.
“Me? You were the one that kept interrupting the story every other moment!” Luna replied.
The two huffed and turned away...looking into the mirror on the wall of the room and saw themselves angry, caught up in being so mad about the story they hadn't even thought of the foals for the last half of it beyond what they 'thought' they needed.
“...Oops...” Pinkie Pie said, mane and tail going flat.
“Oops indeed...it would appear we were so concerned with how we wanted to tell the story...we were frightening the ones for whom it was to be told...” Luna lamented.
“...I just didn't want the twins to be upset...and then I went and made them super upset...I've been a bad auntie...”
“And I feel as though I've been a very bad Princess of the Night who's job it is to help children face their fears in their dreams...” muttered the Princess of the Night. “Pinkie Pie...I'm sorry...this...this story is just important to me...”
“Why?” asked Pinkie.
“...Because I went missing from the world for a thousand years...and not everypony are as long lived as my sister and myself...” Luna replied, giving a sad look down. “...I've had to accept that death is simply part of life...that sometimes ponies go away and don't come back...Learning that lesson as a filly from this story...it helped be get through that...I needed it...And ponies needed it back then when medicine was barely in its infancy and monsters threatened them and there was no promise of living to adulthood...”
Pinkie Pie slowly set the no longer crying twins down and hugged her. Luna hugged her back. “...But the world isn't like that anymore...thanks to you and Celestia...”
“...And you too...I suppose that moral...doesn't hold as much resonance as it used to and perhaps an additional moral is needed...but Pinkie, not all Aesop stories have happy endings, because by their nature, they show the consequences of what they warn about...”
“I know...Hey wait...I think I know a good moral we can both get behind!”
“If you art going to betray us again, godson, do it to our face, not our back,” Deathmare Moon said...angry, but also disappointed, sad.
Dr. Spike saw his godmother's sorrow...but despite knowing he shouldn't, he turned the Princess so her head was facing the hoof of the bed, and thus Deathmare was now at her head.
Deathmare merely turned her head away, tears starting down her cheeks.
The Doctor gave the young filly the herbal tea and she became well...then found the world become dark and cold, his Godmother standing over him with a hoof on his shoulder. “...So be it...come with us, our godchild...”
The Deathmare lead her godson down into a large underground cavern, Dr. Spike unable to resist. He found them surrounded by candles in endless rows and of all shapes and sizes. So many a number to measure them seemed impossible for his mind to comprehend. Some were large (some massively so), others medium, and still others small. Every moment some died out while new ones came into being at the same time. He swore he saw countless copies of the Deathmare, all identical, running around, watching dying candles and vanishing with them while copies of Mother Celestia lit the new candles that appeared...but they weren't copies, were they? “These art the life lights of all pony kind. The large ones belong to children, the medium sized ones to people in their prime, and the little ones to the elderly. The largest art the long lived species like dragons. But sometimes...even children, young creatures, and dragons have tiny ones...”
“...And mine?” asked Dr. Spike, certain his candle would be one of the large dragon sized ones...
Deathmare's eyes filled with tears as she pointed to a tiny, little candle just threatening to go out.
Dr. Spike went ghostly pale. “But...but...you can light a new one for me, right?! As a favor?! I don't want to die! I can become king and marry a princess! I'm too young to die!”
“...We cannot do that...to light candles is the domain of Celestia,” replied the Deathmare. “And unless one old one is snuffed out, a new one cannot be lit. If there is too much death, the world dies, if there is too much life, it is overrun and also dies. Balance between life and death is sadly necessary.”
“Then maybe put mine onto a new one? So it'll keep burning after that?” Spike begged.
“...What do you think you did by sparing the lives of the king and princess?” asked the Deathmare, looking like she wanted to cry. “...For every life there's a death, for every death there's a life...you traded a life for the King's life, and that life should've been yours, but because we spared you, it was passed to the daughter...if we...if I were to spare you again, another must die. Can you look at all these candles and pick out whom should be the one to die in your place?”
Dr. Spike looked over the walls...unable to tell who was who... “Can't you tell me? Maybe we can do it to a bad guy...”
“I only know the names when their time comes: it is my nature to not play favorites and I only did so once for you. Any of these candles could be a saint who deserves a long life or a sinner who deserves to die. It is not my place to know and choose, merely to collect...”
Dr. Spike noticed his godmother was sobbing as he looked at the candles...and finally lowered his head. “...I can't...”
“...Why couldn't you keep your promise?...I loved you...”
“...I loved you too...I'm...I'm sorry...”
“...I'm sorry too...” said the Deathmare as the candle went out and she swung her scythe through her godson. He fell where he stood into a portal that opened before him, the door neither frightening or glorious. It was simply a door. His Godmother tried to reach out to him, but her hoof bounced off the portal like it was a brick wall.
The crying embodiment of Death turned and walked away, looking to a black candle next to a golden one. Both impossibly long and high. The golden one extending to infinity while the black stopped just short of it. “...See you again at the end of time...godson...” she said, sobbing.
Back at the castle, the doctor's body, never having moved from that spot, simply fell dead to the floor.
The twins didn't burst out crying, but still had tears in their eyes as Pinkie closed the book.
Pinkie Pie wiped the tears from their eyes. “...If the doctor had only listened and kept his promise, he'd have been with his godmother for a long time...remember, the easiest way to lose somecreature you love is to break a promise...”
“And all actions have consequences, even ones with which we had the best intentions...” Luna continued.
“So always keep your promises and try to be good fillies, okay?” Pinkie Pie asked.
The twins nodded, listening intently...then yawning.
“Looks like sleepy time...” Pinkie said, going to tuck them in.
“...Any nightmares they may have, I will help them through,” Luna reassured.
“Thanks...I'm sorry for getting so mad...”
“As am I...it was unbecoming of a Princess of the Night...now, my sister is procuring cake, would you like to share?”
“Would I!”
Well, the fairy tale might not have a happy ending, but at least this story does...
Spike looked to Trixie with a smug smirk. “And THAT is how you do a death scene.”
Trixie just glared with an annoyed groan.
Okay then...hey, I do wonder if they'll let me have some cake too...
The End.
