The Thousandth Moon [NaPoWriMo 2019]

Chapters

Chapter 1 - The Celebration and the Tousandth Moon
Chapter 2 – The Sin
Chapter 3 – Old Friends Part 1
Chapter 4 – Old Friends Part 2
Chapter 5 – The Solution

Chapter 1 - The Celebration and the Tousandth Moon

Author's Note

This story was written for National Pony Writing Month 2019 [NaPoWriMo 2019]

This is only the second work of fiction I've ever written (outside of school years ago) with the first being an Iron Author writing event at Everfree Northwest this year. I'm a math and science guy, writing has never been my strength. I don't expect my story to be very good, but I enjoyed writing it. I hope you get some enjoyment from reading it and don't think it's a total train wreck :P

Enjoy!

Chapter 1 - The Celebration and the Tousandth Moon

Twilight stared out at the crowd that had gathered and were waiting to hear her speak. Sweet Celestia that is a lot of ponies. She’d gotten used to speaking in front of crowds over the years; between giving lectures back the School of Friendship, speaking at various royal gatherings, festivals, and many other events, Twilight thought she was getting quite good at it. But there was always just a hint of nervousness that she still felt when she was about to address a large crowd of ponies. Not just ponies, Twilight thought, there are creatures from all over Equestria and beyond. She knew there would be a large crowd, but she seemed to have underestimated just how large it would be. They had almost done this in Canterlot but felt that Ponyville would be more fitting. Twilight wasn’t sure she had seen so many creatures in Ponyville before. She was truly loved. Twilight took a deep breath and mentally steeled herself for what she would have to do next.

A hush fell over the crowd as Twilight stepped forward on the stage. Using her magic to project her voice, she spoke. “Welcome and thank you all for joining me. We have gathered here today to celebrate–” Her voice caught in her throat and she could already feel the tears coming on. All that preparation and rehearsing in the mirror… she thought for sure this time she’d at least make it through the opening without her voice breaking. But there was no helping it, so she didn’t bother to fight it this time and began again, her voice unsteady and tears welling in her eyes. “We’ve gathered here today to celebrate the life and legacy of Pinkamena Diane Pie. Pinkie was the bearer of the Element of Laughter; she was a flowing spring of mirth and happiness wherever she went. And she was one of my best friends in all Equestria.” And with those words, there was no stopping the tears from bursting forth.

When she spoke again, her voice was trembling, “Pinkie was one of the greatest ponies I’ve ever known. I would not be standing here in front of you today if not for her.” She could, and would, say the same about all her best friends but that didn’t make it any less true. “Pinkie showed me how important laughter is and how much power it can have. Sometimes a little laughter is all you need to lift yourself up. And Pinkie was always more than willing to be the source of that laughter. She shared that gift with so many over the years and made friends wherever she went. From Ponyville to Yakyakistan, Griffonstone and beyond, Pinkie always returned from new places having made new friends. Seeing you all here is a testament to that.” She smiled through the tears as she looked out at the crowd and saw a large group of yaks all smiling back at her. Seeing the large groups of creatures from so many different lands really drove home just how much Pinkie had done. Twilight knew how much Pinkie had impacted those in Equestria and beyond, but this was like seeing it again for the first time with a whole new perspective. She wondered if Pinkie herself had realized just how many lives she’d touched.

“Although she travelled far and wide, spreading laughter to all she met, she never forgot her family and friends back home.” Twilight saw Marble, Maud, and Limestone in the front row and made a mental note to make sure she spoke to all of them personally before the day was over. Remember Twilight, this is supposed to be a celebration of Pinkie, let’s bring some levity back into the atmosphere. It is supposed to be a party after all she told herself.

She steadied her voice with some effort, but the tears could not be helped. “We will miss her dearly, but today is not meant to be a day of sadness. Today we celebrate her life and honor her memory by throwing a party. Of course, it could never live up to one of her own parties, but we’ve given it our best shot. I invite you all to come forward and share with us a memory of her that you hold dear. Whether it was your first meeting, a party you attended, or even story you’ve heard about her. As long as we hold on to and cherish these memories, she will never truly be gone.” Her change to a more positive tone had allowed her to stop up the tears. For now, at least. The crowd also seemed to be eager to listen to stories and tell some of their own, which seemed to lift the mood.

Collecting herself once again, Twilight put the tremble in her voice away for good and spoke with a smile, “I will go first. I had a very… peculiar first interaction with Pinkie, as I’m sure some of you may have as well.” She heard a few laughs which she took to mean that, yes, Pinkie first impressions can be quite strange when you don’t know what to expect. “I had just arrived in Ponyville and the first pony I said ‘hello’ to just gasped and took off before I could even blink.” Twilight thought back to that day that seemed so very long ago. “I had work to do so I didn’t think much of it and continued on with my day. It wasn’t until I returned to the library to a surprise party that was properly introduced to Pinkie. I was not happy about it.” There were a few gasps from the audience. Sometimes Twilight forgot that not everyone knew what kind of pony she was before she went off to Ponyville. It was always fun for her to see and hear reactions to the fact that the Princess of Friendship once wanted nothing to do with friendship. “Between preparations for the Summer Sun Celebration and worrying about the prophecy of the return of Nightmare Moon, the last thing I wanted to do was make friends. I would never have believed that that day would have gone the way it did. But I am forever grateful that it did.” The tears were back, this time bittersweet. She had always relished retelling those old stories from back in her early days of friendship. Back when she was still figuring things out with the help of her new friends. Such good memories. It’s a shame they’ve been tainted with sorrow.

Twilight used to think that memories were set in stone; that once you made a memory, it stayed in a form of stasis, never to be altered, not unlike a photograph. And in a way that was true; the memories themselves did not change. Fade, maybe, but not actually change. What Twilight did not expect was how time and context could change the feelings that those memories brought forth inside her. Only a decade ago, reminiscing about the day that they took up the Elements and defeated Nightmare Moon would have brought forth nothing but feelings of love, happiness, and a bit of nostalgia. Those feelings would always be there when revisiting those memories, but now they would forever be joined by feelings of pain and sorrow, knowing that those friends were gone. And it was only a matter of time before nearly every creature here would pass on while she remained.

Twilight suddenly realized that she’d lost herself in her thoughts and had been standing silently for several moments. Not sure just how long of a silence she’d left, she decided it was probably time to let someone else speak. Voice breaking one last time, she said, “I love you, Pinkie Pie” and stepped down off the stage. There was the steady clapping of hooves and claws as she walked down to her seat in the front row. She sat down next to Starlight as a lectern and microphone were brought out for anyone who wished to speak next.

“Are you okay?” Starlight asked quietly.

“Of course I’m not okay” Twilight responded, immediately regretting how the words came out. “I’m sorry, that was– look can we talk later when this is all over?”

Starlight mentally berated herself, why would you ask that, what answer were you expecting from that Starlight?! Outwardly she seemed unfazed by Twilight’s response, “Absolutely. Let’s talk later.” Starlight gave Twilight a light hug and then let her have her space. Starlight could only imagine how hard this must be for Twilight, it was hard for her as well. She and Pinkie had been great friends but Twilight’s bond with the others was something special on a level beyond what Starlight had ever had with them. This wasn’t the first time Twilight had spoken at a celebration of life for a dear friend, but this one seemed to hit her the hardest.

Dozens of ponies, yaks, griffons, hippogriffs, and more must have spoken but Twilight quickly lost count. The speakers varied from telling of hilarious Pinkie hijinks to serious heartfelt words to the stories that their friend of a friend had told them about the legendary party they attended that Pinkie had thrown. Each was unique and each was a reminder of just how much this pink pony had impacted the lives of so, so many. Celestia and Luna each went up to speak about Pinkie as well. But while her words and stories were beautiful and it was clear that she too was deeply impacted by Pinkie’s life, Twilight couldn’t shake the feeling that Celestia was possessed a bit of an underlying numbness. How many of these celebrations has she spoken at over the millennia? How many losses does it take to begin to feel numb toward them? I hope I never reach that point.

Where Celestia had spoken calmly and serenely about Pinkie, Luna was much more emotional. Luna spoke of how Pinkie Pie had played such a large role in her life; specifically in her return from the darkness as Nightmare Moon as well as the part she played in her first Nightmare Night after her return. While the first was true for most of Twilight’s friends that had become the bearers of the Elements of Harmony, Luna felt a special fondness of the pony that had embodied the Element of Laughter. After such a dark time in her life, laughter was a sorely needed light. The two were practically opposites at the time; Luna so serious and rigid, while Pinkie was lighthearted and goofy. Pinkie had really helped Luna come out her shell.

The speakers began to be spaced out more and the attendees had largely moved on to enjoying refreshments. Many still swapped stories on the side while they munched on snacks provided by Sugarcube Corner. It finally started to feel more like a party with laughter filling the air again. Just like she would have wanted, Twilight thought. How many parties had Pinkie herself thrown here? Far too many for anypony to count. With a soft smile Twilight thought, knowing her, Pinkie would have been more than happy to plan this whole thing herself.

Twilight still sat mostly alone in her seat at the front. Starlight had moved over to sit next to Maud and the Pie sisters, none of which had left their seats since arriving, not even to get up and speak. As more time passed and no one else went up to speak, creatures started leaving the party. Some came up to the front to say goodbye and offer their condolences and Twilight thanked each of them for coming. Before heading back to Silver Shoals, Celestia and Luna spoke with the Pie sisters. Twilight couldn’t hear what was said, but the three Pies all hugged the princesses tightly afterward.

Turning away from Maud, Limestone, and Marble, the two princesses came over to Twilight. “Whenever you’d like to talk” Celestia said, “you know where to find us.”

“Thank you. I’m sure you’ll see me soon” Twilight replied as the eldest alicorn embraced her. Twilight didn’t want the moment to end. Celestia had been a constant in her life from nearly the beginning; since the day Twilight was accepted into Celestia’s school, Celestia had been there. And while the nature of their relationship had gone from being teacher and student to being peers, Twilight still looked up to Celestia so much. After all, Twilight was still practically a child in comparison with Celestia’s age and experience even after decades of being an alicorn and ruler of Equestria. At a time in her life when things around her were changing while she felt that she alone were staying the same, Twilight wanted a few more moments to hold on to one of the few things in her life that seemed like it would never change.

When Celestia finally broke off, Twilight saw Luna patiently waiting her turn. As soon as Celestia was clear, Luna practically leapt onto Twilight with a hug. “I’m so sorry Twilight. Pinkie holds a special place in my heart and I’ll never forget her. If you ever need to talk, please don’t hesitate to come visit. I’ll always make time for you, Twilight Sparkle.”

“Thank you, Luna.” Twilight wanted to say more, but she wasn’t sure what else to say at this point; she was just so exhausted. But that didn’t mean she didn’t want to end the embrace, so she held on as long as she could. After that moment too had passed, the two sisters departed.

Soon the party was all but over with just a few stragglers still hanging out by the refreshments and Starlight and the Pie sisters still in their seats. Twilight was not about to tell them it was over or that they had to leave; they could stay as long as they wanted, and Twilight had nowhere to be. Her place was right here.

Maud got up from her seat and slowly made her way to the stage, holding a folded piece of paper in her mouth. As Maud approached the lectern, Twilight turned to see Starlight on the verge of tears. She must have seen what Maud had written, maybe even encouraged her to go up and read it aloud. It didn’t matter that they were the only ones left, this was important to her. Maud set her paper on the lectern and unfolded it. To Twilight, she looked as stoic as usual. It was always so hard to read Maud, even after getting to know her better Twilight still had issues most of the time. The Pie sisters and Starlight seemed to be able to see through into the deep inner feelings of Maud even when nopony else could.

Maud began to read, voice as steady as always,

“Rocks,

I love rocks.

Pinkie Pie,

You are my rock.

What will I do,

Without my rock?”

Maud paused for a moment. “Thank you”, she said and began to make her way back down off the stage. As she did so, Twilight saw a single tear running down her face. The poem was so… perfectly Maud. In six short lines, Maud had expressed her love and grief in a way that was so uniquely her. It was beautiful.

When Maud reached her seat, she was immediately wrapped up in a tearful hug by her sisters and Starlight. The four ponies stayed that way for a while and Twilight desperately wanted to join them but didn’t want to impose on the moment. But Maud caught her eye and nodded an invitation and Twilight immediately made her way to them. She much larger than the rest of them and easily encircled them all in her wings as she joined in the hug. “That was beautiful, Maud.”

“Thank you, Princess”

The five of them stayed in their tearful embrace for a long time. They felt as if Pinkie was there in spirit among them and did not want to let go for fear of losing that feeling. None of them were sure just how long they held on to each other or who broke off first, but eventually the moment had passed, and they separated.

“If you girls need anything at all, please don’t hesitate to ask.” The Pie sisters all nodded an acknowledgement, clearly they were emotionally exhausted and were ready to leave. Twilight gave them all one last hug and watched them as they left.

Finally, when it was just Twilight and Starlight left, Starlight slowly walked over and asked, “Hey, are you ready to talk?”

Twilight didn’t look up to meet her eyes. “Can we do it tomorrow? I have something I want to take care of first.”

“If that’s what you want. I’ll come by your room to talk in the morning.” Starlight gave Twilight a hug and the princess halfheartedly wrapped one wing around Starlight. “Have a good night, Twilight.” And with that, Starlight headed off to Twilight’s old castle in Ponyville.

Twilight left the party in the courtyard and headed for the Everfree Forest. She made her way to the Treehouse of Harmony that had grown above the place that the Tree of Harmony once stood. She raised the moon and darkness fell over the land. She and Starlight had long since created a spell that, when cast, allowed the Sun and Moon to move on their own for a short time so Twilight wouldn’t have to do it manually every day. She only used the spell from time to time; she preferred to do it the old fashioned way.

For several minutes, Twilight stared up at the stars in the West, picking out the perfect spot. Statues and stained-glass windows were wonderful and all, but Pinkie deserved better. They all did. With tears beginning to stream down her face, she reached out and gently moved a hoof-ful of stars into the shape of Pinkie’s cutie mark and placed them next to the constellation of diamonds she had made just last year. This was the fifth time she’d done this. It never got any easier. There. All together again.

Twilight felt the loss of each of them like a hole in her heart that would never heal, but she felt that Pinkie would leave the biggest gap in her life. Not only did she symbolize the end of an era for Twilight simply by being the last of the five to go, but she saw Pinkie far more often than the monthly Counsel of Friendship meetings. Sometimes Twilight was convinced Pinkie possessed power over time and space based on the sheer number of parties Pinkie planned and threw. No one pony could possibly do all of that party planning while still making time for her family and travelling the lands of Equestria and beyond, and yet Pinkie did it. Maybe she got Discord to help her from time to time, that’s the only explanation, she had thought on multiple occasions. Twilight was always happily surprised when Pinkie would show up to celebrate a random holiday or occasion. After it became clear that Twilight almost never knew what the occasion was when Pinkie threw a party for the more obscure ones, they made a game out of it. The first thing Pinkie would do when she’d surprised Twilight with a party is look at her expectantly and Twilight needed to guess the occasion with the first thing that came to her mind. Once Twilight started to catch on, Pinkie would drop those celebrations and come up with more obscure ones in an attempt to stump Twilight.

Twilight would never forget the year that she thought Pinkie had actually somehow forgotten her birthday only to be surprised the next morning with breakfast in bed and a “I Bet You Thought I Forgot Your Birthday, Bet You Didn’t See This Coming” Party. The following year, Pinkie got her again by throwing a party two days before her birthday. Twilight soon learned that any day within a week of her birthday was fair game and she was always on the lookout for signs when the day drew near. Her royal guards also loved this time of year, especially Gallus. Seeing the princess hyperalert looking for clues for a surprise party never ceased to amuse them. Plus, they always got to eat cake, so it was a win-win situation for them.

Some of Twilight’s favorite party themes and names revolved around obscure anniversaries of events or milestones. Her hundredth time raising the sun had been the “Suntennial Celebration”, Pinkie had thrown a party following her tenth royal decree, the party on the 25th anniversary of the defeat of Tirek, Chrysalis, and Cozy Glow had been called the “Quarter Centaur-y of No Meanies”. Twilight could think of a dozen more parties with unique names and occasions that Pinkie had thrown. She looked back up to the stars in the sky. I miss you all so much. I know you’ll watch over me.

This is a bad idea, the voice in the back of Twilight’s mind kept telling her. It’s far too soon. Don’t do this to yourself. But Twilight had made up her mind and she was heading for Sugarcube Corner. She knew that she needed to do something to take her mind of the grief she was feeling. She also knew that voice at the back of her mind was right, this was not the right way to go about it. But she didn’t care.

Not bothering to knock at the door, Twilight used her magic to teleport herself down into Pinkie’s party planning cave in the basement. The girls had all agreed that several of their belongings could be taken and placed into a new museum that Twilight had been working on with Sunburst. Both magical items and personal effects of various famous and important ponies in Equestrian history would be stored there alongside stories and legends about the ponies themselves. The plan was to eventually include areas for all known races living in Equestria and beyond, but they had to start somewhere, and they had the most access to knowledge and artifacts from pony history, so it was the logical place to start. The museum was being built near the School of Friendship and the two would operate together to share the knowledge, stories, and items held within.

Twilight had decided to come here and pick up a few things to add to the collection being made for her and her friends at the museum. She’d already cleared things with the Pie sisters and Lil Cheese who said that anything she wanted for the museum could be taken and they would figure out the rest. Twilight started to move some items into a pile to take with her. A party cannon, Boneless 27, and a few of Pinkie’s party files would probably be a good place to start.

Twilight used her magic to grab a few random files and quickly looked through the contents of each. She’d pulled the files for Pound and Pumpkin Cake, Trixie, Celestia, and Ocellus. A good sample, these will do nicely, she thought. She added them to the small pile of items she was taking and teleported them back to her old castle. They would stay there in storage until the museum was ready to add them to the displays.

She was done. She should leave. But she couldn’t. You know that’s not what you really came here for. She knew what she wanted to see but Twilight wasn’t sure she could bring herself to actually look at it. But her curiosity won out and she began to look. She spotted the filing cabinet that was covered in the cutie marks of her and her friends and opened a few drawers. She saw the extensive files Pinkie had kept for likes, dislikes, and party plans and ideas for Applejack, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, and Rarity. But nothing for me? That’s odd. Twilight looked around the room again. Last time she had been down here she was sure that her file was with those of her friends. That had been a long time ago, but she couldn’t think of a reason why Pinkie would move her file someplace else.

Twilight used her magic to tidy up the room a bit in hopes of making it bit easier to find her file. The room tended to get a bit messy when Pinkie was in full party planning mode and, more often than not, Pinkie was immediately on to the next party so the mess from the previous one wasn’t cleaned up, it was merely covered with new mess. Twilight almost felt it was a shame to touch it, it was such a beautiful mess to her; “organized chaos” Pinkie used to call it. It may have looked like a whirlwind had swept through the place, but Pinkie could find anything she needed whenever she wanted.

Once the room was a bit closer to Twilight’s definition of ‘organized’ she looked around the room again. It had to be around here somewhere. Ah, it must be in there! Wait, is this all mine? Twilight stood before a filing cabinet that was taller than her. It had been mostly obscured by other boxes, papers, and a ladder leaning against it. But now that it had been cleared, there was no doubt that this cabinet was hers. Her cutie mark adorned each drawer alongside little drawings Pinkie had done of them together.

Twilight opened a drawer and saw that it was filled to the brim with files. She opened each drawer to see if they were also full. They were. Twilight’s mouth hung open for a moment. How many parties had Pinkie planned for her? There must have been hundreds of files in this cabinet. Twilight opened a drawer near the top and randomly selected a file. It was labeled “Twilight’s 250th Birthday”. Twilight flipped through the notes. Pinkie had planned to bake a 250 layer cake with 250 candles on top, alongside 250 cupcakes, and a synchronized firing of 250 party cannons. She had a chart to determine the amount of time it would take for the layers of the 250 layer cake to bake properly and the window of time she’d need to put it all together to achieve maximum flavor. She’d included factors that could decrease the total preparation time based on who would be helping her with the cake and who the best helpers would be for the job based around the specific challenges of making this cake. Pinkie was nothing if not thorough in her plans. She also hadn’t settled on how she would surprise Twilight with this party and had multiple options listed. Some had already been crossed out and others had stars next to them. Surely Pinkie must have known that she never would have been able to throw this party, right? That birthday is well over a century away.

Twilight imagined Pinkie making the plans for this party, so proud of herself for continuing to have new ideas with which to surprise her friend. It made Twilight smile, but it also made her sad. Pinkie loved throwing parties, there must have been an element of sadness that went with planning a party that she’d never be able throw and enjoy for herself. Clearly the joy Pinkie felt from doing this far exceeded any sorrow she may have felt. She’d poured her heart into these plans.

Twilight pulled file after file. Each time she did, her sadness grew a little bit more. These were all so beautiful and a part of Pinkie Pie that now could never exist without her. Pinkie had plans for parties in this cabinet for at least the next 400 years for various birthdays, anniversaries, and milestones. Twilight pulled another: “The Thousandth Moon”. This one, like all the others, listed the occasion, detailed party plans, and date that the party was to be held. But Twilight noticed something special about this one; something that immediately struck her the moment she saw it. This party had a significance above all the others she’d read. This one was supposed to be today. She hadn’t even known that the new moon she’d raised just a few hours ago had been her thousandth since taking over the responsibility. Of course Pinkie would have known that and planned a party for it. This was the first party in a very long list that would never be thrown.

This is all coming with me. Twilight gathered all the filing cabinets in the room. She didn’t bother to check whose files were in each of them; she wanted them all. She wasn’t yet sure what she would do with all of them, but she knew she wasn’t leaving them here. Once she had gathered them all together, she teleport herself with them to her room in her old castle.

Chapter 2 – The Sin

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Chapter 3 – Old Friends Part 1

Starlight disappeared in a flash and Twilight was once again alone in the library with just her thoughts. As much as she didn’t want to face Starlight after what she had done, once she had arrived at the library and they had talked, Twilight didn’t want her to go. But she knew that her old friend needed time; this was a huge change for her.

Twilight turned back to the desk covered in books and parchment. She really wanted to get back to researching the spell, but she wasn’t sure that she could right now. She sat down and picked up one of the books she’d been reading when Starlight arrived and began to read. She could tell her mind was elsewhere and found herself turning several pages but having no idea what she’d read. After attempting to read through the same page four times without anything sticking, she decided it was time for a real break.

I need to tell Celestia and Luna what I’ve done. Twilight didn’t like the thought of confessing this act to her old mentor, but she knew it was the right thing to do. With her next step decided, Twilight tidied up the desk and quickly gathered a few items that she wanted to take along with her and teleported to the throne room in Canterlot. “Guard?” She called out, knowing there had to be at least one guard within earshot of the throne room.

A young earth pony guard came through the doors. “Oh, Your Highness, good to see that you’re back! Some of us were beginning to worry about you. Are you alright?” She asked.

“No need to worry about me Autumn” she replied, intentionally not answering her question. “Please inform Captain Stone that I will be leaving for Silver Shoals first thing in the morning and expect to be back within the week. I will let her know if my trip will take any longer.”

“Yes, Princess Twilight. Anything else?”

“Actually, yes.” She smiled at the earth pony before her. “Keep up the good work Autumn. It hasn’t gone unnoticed. We’re lucky to have you.” The earth pony’s cheeks took on a light shade of pink and she smiled back at Twilight. “That will be all, Autumn. Thank you.”

“Thank you, Princess!” Spring replied and left the throne room. A good pony, that Autumn, Twilight thought. Autumn Harvest was new on the guard staff and Twilight always wanted to make her guards as feel welcome and comfortable around her as possible. Many guards were too stiff around her when they joined, and Twilight always had to work to get them to loosen up a bit. She felt she’d done a good job of getting Autumn to open up.

Twilight went to her suite in the castle. There were still several hours of daylight left in the day, but she was so exhausted she was sure that there was no way she would be able to do anything productive for the rest of the day. She cast the spell to ensure the sun and moon would fall and rise at a predetermined time for the next twenty-four hours, then drew a bath and settled in. Her muscles had gotten so tense and stiff spending all that time sitting at the desk in the Canterlot Library. A nice hot bath was just what she needed to loosen up. But while her body was still and relaxing, her mind still raced. She replayed the events of the last few days over and over in her mind. She hadn’t noticed it at the time, but looking back, all she could see was the look of fear in Starlight’s eyes and the magic began to swirl around the room. I will make this right, Twilight thought.

She wasn’t sure how long she stayed in the bath, but eventually she forced herself to leave and crawl into her bed. Despite her exhaustion, sleep did not come easily. And when it did, it wasn’t peaceful. Not at first. Starlight’s transformation played out again and again in her dreams; this time the visions were warped into nightmares. Something was different each time the scene played out. In some of them, she used dark magic on Starlight like that of King Sombra. In others, Starlight never recovered from her transformation. And in others still, it wasn’t Starlight in the dream at all. It was hard to tell how many variations played out, but finally there was a scenario in which Princess Luna had appeared and fought Twilight, stopping her from sparking Starlight’s transformation. It was only after Luna had intervened that the hours of restless sleep subsided, and Twilight could sleep peacefully.

When Twilight awoke the next morning, she still felt a little groggy and slow. While she did get some hours of good sleep in, the restless ones had prevented her from fully recovering her energy. She peeked out the window to see the sun had only just risen. Although she had been able to use that spell for a while now, it was still a bit odd to her to see the sun behaving as if it had risen on its own.

I guess I should probably get going, Twilight thought. She’d decided to take the train for once; she did that so rarely these days. And even though she knew speaking to Celestia and Luna was the right thing to do, she still wanted to delay the meeting if she could. This was a nice compromise; she wasn’t not going to see them, she just wasn’t doing it as quickly as she could by choosing to take the train rather than teleport.

Twilight made her way down to the Canterlot train station, insisted on buying a ticket when she was told she could ride for free, and boarded the train. As it pulled out of the station, Twilight thought back to her early days as an alicorn. How strange it was in those first few weeks to wake up in the mornings and remember that she had wings. After living so many years without them, it took a while to get used to. Now, after so many years of having them, she’d forgotten what it was like without them.

She wondered how long it would take Starlight to get used to her wings. Twilight imagined it wouldn’t take her very long. Starlight was always so quick to learn and adjust, she wouldn’t be surprised if the new alicorn flew circles around her when they spoke next. Oh Starlight. I’m so sorry. I can’t believe I made such a monumental choice in such an emotionally fragile state… I should be better than that. It wasn’t like Twilight had never considered the possibility of Starlight becoming an alicorn before. But when she thought of Celestia, she realized that she had ruled for thousands of years, a thousand by herself, and hadn’t found anypony worthy of becoming a princess. Until me. How can I know if she’s the right choice? Twilight used to ask herself. It didn’t matter now; if Twilight couldn’t reverse the transformation, then Starlight was a princess whether she liked it or not.

Before she knew it, the train had arrived at the station. Almost all of the passengers had already disembarked by the time she had pulled herself back from her thoughts. Twilight stepped off the train and stretched out her wings which had gotten a bit stiff during the journey.

As she began to make her way to the Silver Shoals Retirement Community, she took in the lovely day around her. The late morning sun was shining down on her with a gentle warmth and all around her she could hear the sounds of nature. Canterlot could feel so stuffy sometimes. Even with it’s wide open areas with gardens and the like, it was hard to compete with actual nature. As she approached the center of the community, she heard more and more sounds of creatures of all kinds enjoying their leisure activities.

Twilight walked through the doors to the main office and a small bell rang at the open and close of the door. At the front desk, Twilight saw the receptionist with his muzzle in some paperwork. “I’ll be with you in just a moment, just need to finish this up.” He said without looking up from his work. Twilight waited patiently for him to finish what he was doing. When he finally looked up, the unicorn’s cheeks turned red and he began to stammer, “P-Princess Twilight! I-I’m so sorry for making you wait. I-I had no idea it was you.”

Twilight chuckled lightly, “Oh it’s quite alright. I am just here to see Princesses Celestia and Luna. Do you know where they would be right now?”

“Ah yes, let me take a look and see what they’ve got scheduled for today.” He shuffled some paperwork around on the desk until he found what he was looking for. “Here it is. Princess Celestia appears to have just finished up a painting session and Princess Luna just started a dive off the coast and should be back in about an hour or so. After that she’s free until the evening.”

So they’re separate. Perfect. I was thinking I’d like to speak to them individually anyway. “Thank you for your help” Twilight said with a smile. “Do you know where Princess Celestia goes after painting?”

“Back to her suite I suppose.” He motioned back to the doors behind him. “Feel free to take a look around.”

“Thank you again,” Twilight said as she headed for the back doors. She made her way to the royal sisters’ suites near the edge of the retirement community. She remembered the way from the times she’d visited before, although it had been a while since the last time. Too long, Twilight thought to herself. She really should come visit more often. Every time Twilight approached the suites, she was reminded of Celestia and Luna telling her the story about them when she visited for the first time.

The suites looked out of place here even though they’d been constructed in the same style in an attempt to fit in. Celestia and Luna had told her that when they had said they wanted to move to Silver Shoals, the staff had insisted that they build new royal suites for the sisters. When the two alicorns said that they wanted to live in the same accommodations as everypony else, the staff demanded that they be allowed to do something special for the sisters after all that the two had done for Equestria over the years. These new suites were a compromise, although it was more of a seventy-five/twenty-five compromise in favor of the Silver Shoals staff’s wishes; they may have exceeded the other living areas by a country mile but they weren’t nearly as extravagant as they would have been had Celestia and Luna not stepped in several times to request that they be toned down. The two suites were elevated with a beautiful view of the coastline. None of the living areas here had a bad view, but the sisters’ view was spectacular.

Twilight knocked on the door to Celestia’s suite and a few moments later the door opened. “Twilight! Oh I’m glad you came by.” Celestia wrapped her hooves around Twilight in a hug. “I just want to say again how sorry I am for your loss. I saw the new constellation in sky a few nights ago. They’re perfect together. Please, come in and sit down.” She ushered Twilight into the living room and gestured toward the couch for Twilight to sit. The elder alicorn took a seat on what looked like the most comfortable plush chair in all of Equestria.

“Now, whatever you need, I’m here for you. Go ahead and speak your mind freely. I’ve got all day for you, my dear.” Using her magic, Celestia grabbed a box of tissues from the kitchen and placed them on the table in front of Twilight. After a few moments of silence, Celestia spoke up again. “Would you like some tea or maybe something to eat? There’s plenty here I can–”

“Starlight is an alicorn” Twilight said suddenly, not looking up at Celestia.

Celestia stopped, certain of what she’d heard but still needing to confirm it. “Starlight Glimmer. Is an alicorn?” Celestia hadn’t expected this. She’d expected Twilight to open up about Pinkie Pie and the rest of her fellow element bearers, not this. She thought back to the celebration of Pinkie and she didn’t seem to recall Starlight having wings, but she also hadn’t paid Starlight much attention either. “I must say, I’m a little surprised Twilight. Maybe not with your choice, but perhaps your timing. When did this happen?”

“The day after the party,” Twilight replied. She raised her head to look at Celestia. “And what do you mean by my choice doesn’t surprise you?”

“Well, I think if you were to choose somepony to rule alongside you that Starlight would be an excellent choice. She’s proven herself time and time again and has come so very far since the two of you met. She’d make an excellent fellow ruler and advisor. I’m just surprised that you chose to do it when you did. I had thought that if you were going to choose Starlight, you would have done so years ago. Was this something the two of you had discussed before?”

Twilight winced. “Well… actually…” she paused and took a deep breath, “I was… emotionally unstable following the party. I felt as if everypony I’d loved was slowly slipping away through my hooves. Starlight has always been there for me. And when she came to comfort me, I–” she sniffled as tears began to flow down her cheeks, “I couldn’t bear the thought of losing her too. So I acted out of selfish desperation. And now I’ve permanently changed the life of one of the ponies I hold most dear without thinking it through or even considering what she wanted. Even if she forgives me, I don’t know if I will be able to forgive myself if I don’t make it right.” Not knowing what else to say, Twilight went silent, the only sound in the room were her sniffles.

Celestia stood up, stepped over to Twilight, and gently wrapped a wing around her and spoke softly. “You know, I never asked you what you wanted all those years ago. I set you on a path hoping that it would lead to your destiny. And I hoped that that destiny would be the one I had envisioned; one where you stood by my side as a princess. Luckily for all of us, this ended up being the case. But even after you’d overcome everything on your path and proved that you were worthy, I was still worried about what might happen.”

Twilight looked up at her former mentor. This was the first time she’d ever heard of this. “And why is that?”

“I still had so much self-doubt at the time. I spent so many years on my own, Twilight. When Luna was gone… to say it was difficult to carry on would be the understatement of my life. Knowing that not only had I failed to save my sister from herself but also that I was the one to banish her to the moon was a burden nopony should ever have to bear. I carried on because Equestria needed me to. I hoped to find somepony to either rule with me or take my place, but I felt that I couldn’t trust myself with that decision after what happened with Luna. If I couldn’t see the signs then, I wasn’t so sure I could prevent the same thing from happening again. But I had to try.

“I had already thought once before that I had found a worthy successor; Sunset Shimmer. I had hoped that she would have been worthy of becoming an alicorn before the time of Nightmare Moon’s return. I hoped that she would have stood at my side and aided in her defeat and perhaps her redemption. But you know her story; that wasn’t meant to be. No matter what I said or did, I couldn’t stop Sunset from leaving. And after she abandoned Equestria, abandoned me, my self-doubt worsened. I had looked for centuries for one who could potentially stand with me or take my place and Sunset had been the only one who I thought had come close. When she left, I felt lost once again, with Nightmare Moon’s return just short time away.

“I had no idea what the future would hold. When you came to my school, I recognized the power and heart you possessed. I knew you would do great things, but with the pain of the incident with Sunset still fresh, I found it hard to put too much hope in you as the one destined to stand by my side. The doubt in my mind told me that I was seeing what I wanted to see; that the greatness I saw in you wasn’t real but was only in my imagination because I was desperate to see greatness somewhere. I never brought up the possibility of becoming an alicorn because, after Sunset, I was afraid of what the allure of that kind of power would do to a pony. Even one with a heart such as yours. It sounds so ridiculous in hindsight that I would ever consider that you could react in such a way to the prospect of power, but again, my self-doubt made it hard for me to see clearly. I thank the stars that everything has turned out the way that it has.”

For several moments, Twilight remained silent. This was all new information that she’d never heard from Celestia before. She knew the years without Luna had been difficult for Celestia, but she hadn’t fully realized the magnitude of her loneliness. “I guess my own self-doubts played a pretty big part in all of this as well. I knew that selecting somepony to rule with me would be an important decision. But something felt wrong about the idea of keeping all of the girls around as princesses. We all worked well as a counsel, but I never really saw princess as any of their destinies. And even if I had seen it in one of them, I wouldn’t feel right selecting only one of them out of the five.

“When it came to Starlight, I really believed that she could be the right choice years ago. But it felt too… easy. You ruled alone for centuries, and in all that time you found just two ponies who you believed may have the potential to stand by your side. Finding the right pony within a decade of becoming a princess, and before even becoming ruler, just didn’t seem right.”

“Oh Twilight. Just because a decision seems easy doesn’t necessarily mean it’s wrong. Yes, some of the most important decisions in life are the most difficult, but that’s not always the case. So you believed Starlight was the right choice back then, has your mind changed?” Celestia asked.

Twilight thought about it for a moment. She did still believe Starlight was a good choice. “No. It hasn’t. But that doesn’t change the fact that what I did was a mistake. And I have to fix it.”

Celestia raised an eyebrow, “Oh? And how exactly do you plan on doing that?”

“By reversing it.” Twilight said, as if it were as simple as that.

“You’re not planning on using time spells, are you?” Celestia asked, worryingly. “This isn’t the kind of thing you can just rewind. This is a major point in Equestrian history now whether you like it or not.”

Twilight shook her head. “No. Not with time spells. I plan on creating a reversal spell. I’ve got a few leads already, albeit longshots. But I think I can create something.”

“The creation of that spell could be dangerous. If you really want to do this, please be careful.” Twilight could hear the genuine concern in Celestia’s voice. “Let’s say that you finish this spell and it works. You already think Starlight is a good choice, would you really want to change her back?”

“Of course not! I want her by my side! But this isn’t about what I want! It’s about giving her a choice!” Twilight took a deep breath and made conscious effort to lower her voice back to a normal after that outburst. “This is something I have to do, or I won’t be able to forgive myself. What kind of Princess of Friendship would I be if I just let this go? I hurt my friend, I need to make it right. It’s as simple as that.” Twilight got up to leave.

“Twilight, some mistakes can’t be fixed. Trust me, I know.”

“Well if this one can’t, at least I will have given it a try.” Twilight stopped at the door, turning to look back at her old mentor. “I’m truly grateful that I’ll always have you. We may not always agree on things, but… you are my constant. And I love you dearly.”

Celestia got up and embraced her at the door. “And I’m eternally grateful to have you, and I love you more than you can know. Best of luck with your spell. I may not think it’s the best way to go about this, but I fully support you. As always, let me know if you need anything.”

“I will. Thank you.” And with that, Twilight walked back out into the sun.

Twilight felt a weight off of her shoulders now that she’d admitted her mistake to Celestia. And getting insight into Celestia’s thoughts during the days leading up to Nightmare Moon’s return was something Twilight was not expecting. Twilight was determined to create that reversal spell and wanted to get back to Canterlot right away to get back to work. But first, she needed to speak to Luna.

She made her way down to the shore where she’d been told Luna’s dive had been scheduled. Twilight sat on a nearby bench to await the return of the divers. Before too long, seaponies began to breach the surface and fly through the air before splashing back down in the water. Twilight was amazing to see that Princess Luna was among them. When she had been told Luna was on a dive, she expected it to be more in a traditional sense with masks or maybe magical bubbles.

The seaponies surfaced once more and transformed back into their normal selves with the necklaces they wore around their necks. Once back to their old selves, they returned the necklaces to the instructor and began to go their separate ways. Twilight waved a hoof to catch Luna’s attention. Luna, as well as half of the divers, noticed and waved back politely.

“Twilight, how lovely to see you!” Luna said as she gave Twilight a hug. Her voice quickly took on a more serious tone, like a doctor asking questions of a patient. “How are you feeling? Still tired from last night? You know, that was the hardest I’ve worked to break a nightmare in ages. It was quite a doozy.”

Twilight stopped for a moment to think. So that was actually Luna herself in my dream last night. Sometimes it can be hard to tell if she’s a character in the dream or actually in the dream herself. “I can still feel the effects of the restless sleep a little, but it’s not nearly as bad as it would have been if you hadn’t stepped in. Thank you for that. I didn’t know that you still entered dreams.”

“You know, sometimes I think I retired too young.” Luna said as she sat down on the bench next to Twilight. “I still feel like I have so much I can offer the ponies of Equestria. Doing work in dreams has allowed me to keep helping ponies while I’m retired. But I haven’t entered one of your dreams in a long time. Mostly because you don’t usually have troubled dreams. But what I saw last night… is that what you’re here to discuss? Did that happen?”

“Yes, that’s why I’m here. And yes, that did happen. Well, kind of. Not exactly.” Twilight corrected herself when she remembered the dreams were warped versions of the events. “There was no dark magic, and Starlight is fine. It didn’t happen the same way it played out in the nightmares. But yes, Starlight is now an alicorn.”

“And why is this troubling you? Do you fear that you have made a poor choice? For what it’s worth, I think Starlight Glimmer will make an excellent princess.” Luna said with a smile, unsure of what part was bothering Twilight.

“Well at the beginning where I was emotionally distraught and made the decision selfishly? That part did happen that way.”

“Oh. I see. And what does Ms. Glimmer think of all this?”

“She was angry and disappointed in me. Justifiably so. I’m angry and disappointed in myself. What I did was nigh unforgivable. To make such a decision that would affect her life forever without a thought about what she wanted. And not only that, but to do so while in such a state…” She trailed off. When she looked up at Luna, she saw that her eyes had begun to tear up. “What’s wrong Luna?”

“You know, I once made a mistake that changed the lives of many ponies forever, including the one I hold most dear. I know what it’s like to feel that what you’ve done is unforgivable. Just as you feel that there may be nothing you can do to fix what you’ve done to Starlight, I too felt that I could never fix what I’d done to my sister and all of Equestria. I can’t take back the thousand years of sadness and loneliness that my sister endured while I was banished. I created the Tantabus to punish myself; to never let myself forget what I’d done. But as you and your friends showed me, that wasn’t the right choice. Only by forgiving myself could I truly move past what I’d done, and part of that process was accepting that there was nothing I could ever do to fix my past actions. Never forget your past mistakes, but don’t dwell on them either. Time spent worrying about things that cannot be changed is time wasted.”

“I understand how you felt Luna, but I think that there is a way to fix what I’ve done.” Luna opened her mouth to speak. “Without using time spells to undo it.” Twilight said before she had a chance to ask. “I think I know how a counter spell might be created that would reverse Starlight’s transformation. I’ve only begun the early stages of researching how this might be possible, but I’m confident that I will find a way. Eventually.”

“Are you sure that is a wise decision? Transformative magic can be difficult to get right in the most basic of cases, but you’re talking about reversing an alicorn transformation. The complexity required will be far beyond anything I’ve ever seen.”

“I have to try.” Twilight said.

“Well, I certainly understand the intense desire one can have for righting a wrong. And I know how you can be once you’ve set your mind to something.” Luna gave her a soft smile. “If this is the path you wish to take, then I wish you luck with the spell. But please Twilight, do be careful. And should you discover this task is not one you are able to accomplish, don’t be afraid to move on. If you ever need to talk again, no matter what it’s about, please come visit.”

“I will, thank you Luna.” Twilight said as she embraced Luna. “I guess I should get back to my research. I’ll visit you both again soon. I promise.”

“Good luck, Twilight Sparkle.”

Chapter 4 – Old Friends Part 2

When Starlight had teleported herself away from the Canterlot Library, she’d reappeared on the front steps. She wasn’t sure where to go yet, but she didn’t want to spend any more time down in the restricted section with Twilight. She needed time away from her to think. She’d put the cloak back on and luckily her wings had decided to cooperate and stay nice and concealed beneath it. Hungry again. I guess going four days without eating will do that to you.

She picked up some food and stopped to sit and eat it in a courtyard while she thought about what to do next. She needed to talk to someone and there had only been three ponies in her life that she’d been able to talk to about anything. Twilight, Sunburst, and Trixie. At the thought of Trixie she gently touched the necklace she wore. You always said you’d be with me as long as I wore this. Looks like you may be stuck with me forever, Trix.

Sunburst it is then. After retiring from working at the School of Friendship, Sunburst had moved back to the Crystal Empire to be an advisor once again for Cadance and Flurry Heart. In his spare time, he still was a student of magic; always reading through dusty old tomes or trying some new spell he’d been working on. Although they saw each other just a few weeks ago, it felt like it had been months or years; it would be good to see him again. Starlight finished her snack and prepared to make the trip to the Crystal Empire. No need for a train, I suppose. Her horn glowed and she teleported in an instant to the Crystal Empire, just outside Sunburst’s door.

Starlight knocked on the door and after a few moments the door opened. Sunburst greeted her warmly, “Hey there Starlight! Good to see you! Please, come in. Make yourself at home.” The two friends made their way into the house and Starlight took a seat. “Can I get you anything? Maybe some tea or hot cocoa?”

“A hot cocoa would be great, thank you Sunburst” Starlight replied.

“Coming right up.” Sunburst went to the kitchen and returned a few moments later with a steaming mug of hot cocoa for Starlight and some tea for himself. “Here you go. You know, if you’re cold I can start a fire and you can hang your cloak up by the door.”

“Uh. Okay. Just… just don’t freak out okay?”

Sunburst raised an eyebrow. “And why would I freak out exactly? It’s just your cloak.”

“Okay, don’t say I didn’t warn you.” Starlight took off the cloak, revealing her new wings.

Sunburst dropped his tea and the mug shattering on the floor. He didn’t seem to notice. “How did–? When did–? What?! You’re an alicorn?! Wait, are you messing with me? Is this some kind of joke?” Sunburst stepped over and just stared at her wings, studying them. He reached out and touched her wings gently to see if they were real. They are. How can this be? He thought. This is amazing.

Sunburst began to softly prod at other points along her wings for longer than Starlight would have liked, his jaw now slack. The new alicorn began to feel a little uncomfortable; like she’d become the subject of one of Sunburst’s research projects. “Sunburst? You okay there buddy?”

That seemed to snap him out of his trance. “Oh, sorry.” He stopped touching her wing and moved to face her again. “Yes, I’m fine. How are you feeling? I mean, what does it feel like to be an alicorn? This is so amazing! And when did this even happen?! I just saw you a few weeks ago! And… and how is this even possible?”

Starlight raised a hoof to fend off more questions. “Whoa, okay, slow down. One question at a time please.” She smiled softly at her friend. I haven’t seen him this excited in a long time. She could hardly blame him, but she wished she could share in his excitement. “First of all, I’m not sure how I’m feeling. Physically, I feel better than I ever have. I’ve got the energy I had as a young mare. I teleported myself here from Canterlot and before that I teleported myself there from Ponyville with practically no effort. It was quite exhilarating to know I hold that much power now. But emotionally… I… I still don’t know. On one hoof, this is pretty amazing; this may be the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me. But on the other…” she trailed off.

“What? What’s wrong Starlight?” Sunburst asked.

“Twilight did this to me.”

“Well yeah, who else would have done it?” Sunburst asked, confused. “You weren’t a student of Celestia or Luna. It makes sense that Twilight would be the one to initiate your transformation. Although I wasn’t a hundred percent sure she had the power to do that in the first place.”

“No Sunburst, I mean, she didn’t give me a choice. She forced this on me.”

“Oh.” Sunburst wasn’t sure what else to say. “That’s… Well… That doesn’t seem like her at all.”

“That’s the problem, she wasn’t herself. She was drowning in grief over Pinkie and was already in a very emotionally fragile state. To comfort and reassure her I told her I would be there for her whenever she needed me. I think the thought of eventually losing me too was what pushed her over the edge.” Starlight recounted for Sunburst the events from the celebration of Pinkie through her confrontation with Twilight in the Canterlot Library. Sunburst sat and listened to the whole thing, fighting the urge to interrupt with one of the many, many questions flowing through his mind.

When Starlight was done speaking there was silence in the room that lingered longer than Sunburst would have liked. But he was still processing what he’d heard and was trying to figure out what to say. Starlight, now done with the story, clearly had nothing else to add and was content with waiting on him. Finally he simply said, “I can’t imagine what that must have been like.” He paused, mind still racing. “So what happens now?” He asked.

“Honestly, I have no idea. Twilight said she was researching the possibility of creating a spell to reverse the change but said that such a spell could take years to create if it’s even possible.”

“I don’t know if that’s such a good idea. There would be no way to know for sure if a spell like that would work without extensive testing first and there are only a hoof-ful of ponies in all of Equestria that it could even be tested on. Permanent physical alteration of the body to such a degree using magic is a tricky thing already, but now we’re talking reversing the alicorn transformation which is already on a whole different level. Even if a spell to reverse the transformation could be created, you wouldn’t want to use that kind of spell without a one hundred percent certainty that it would work. This is the kind of spell that exists only in theory; it’s simply too dangerous to try.” Celestia, Luna, and Cadance were the only ponies in all of Equestria that that spell could be tested on assuming Twilight was doing the casting. And Flurry Heart wouldn’t be a viable candidate since she never went through an ascension herself. And I bet none of them would be very excited at the prospect of being a test subject.

“Well… it sounds like I should get used to the idea of being like this forever then. It’s just so much to process, I don’t know if I even can. The idea that just a week ago I was thinking that I had only a few decades left and I’m now immortal with all of time ahead of me. ‘Forever’ was a concept that was difficult to wrap my mind around already, and now it’s a reality that I have to live. It’s… overwhelming to say the least.” She paused to collect her thoughts. “It really is quite amazing though isn’t it? Maybe it won’t be so bad; there’s a lot I could do for the creatures living in Equestria and beyond. But I can’t help but feel that this is all wrong and that I don’t deserve it.”

“I can understand where you’re coming from with the whole ‘forever’ thing. Don’t forget, we did briefly discuss it when we were working on that age spell together. And I don’t know if I’d say you don’t deserve it.” Sunburst said. “I would argue your case for being an alicorn is stronger than most. You’ve learned and accomplished so much since… well, ya know…”

Starlight raised an eyebrow, “My village?”

“Yeah, that.” Sunburst said sheepishly, wishing he hadn’t even alluded to it. “Besides, all the research I’ve done about alicorns has led me to believe that while transformations are almost exclusively triggered by another alicorn, the subject of the transformation must also be worthy in order for it to work. So in all likelihood, the fact that you transformed should be proof that you are worthy of it.”

“Huh, I wonder if Twilight knew that. I guess that explains why I saw my own magic during my transformation even thought I didn’t cast anything. That was my ‘worthiness’ manifesting itself?”

“More or less. Aside from the princesses, I may be the most knowledgeable about alicorns out of everypony in Equestria.” Starlight gave him a look as if she thought he may be exaggerating. “Trust me, I did a lot of research when Flurry Heart was growing up. Of course, almost none of it was relevant to her since she was an alicorn at birth, but the knowledge has still come in handy from time to time.”

Starlight gave her old friend a smile, “Well don’t be surprised if I come asking questions from time to time. I know Twilight will be able to answer most questions I will have about being an alicorn, but it’s nice to know I can get a second opinion.” She said with a wink.

“Well I will be more than happy to help in any way that I can, Princess.” Starlight physically flinched in response to being called a princess. “You are a princess now, right? I mean, that’s kinda how it works isn’t it? Alicorns are princesses. I haven’t read of any alicorns that weren’t given the title.”

“I… I don’t know. I mean, I guess I am? It didn’t really come up when I spoke with Twilight. I’ll have to add that to the list of things to ask her about the next time I see her.” The thought of being a princess hadn’t actually crossed her mind. She knew ‘alicorn’ and ‘princess’ were practically synonymous, but she’d been so focused on her physical transformation that she hadn’t even considered the implications it would have on her position in society. She’d always enjoyed working behind the scenes and hoped this wouldn’t force her into a more public position that didn’t allow for as much time to get actual work done. “Princess Starlight Glimmer. Ugh. That will take some getting used to. Starlight Glimmer, Princess of… Nothing. Well at least I don’t have to pick what I’m the princess of.”

“I’m sure Twilight will know. Or you may end up not getting that kind of title at all. Flurry Heart hasn’t become the princess of anything yet and has just gone by Princess Flurry Heart all this time. I’m just so excited for everything you’re going to be able to accomplish as an alicorn. Even though I won’t be around to see most of, I know you’re going to do great things.” Sunburst stepped over and embraced his old friend.

As Starlight returned the hug she said, “Thank you, Sunburst. I wouldn’t be the pony I am today without you. And you know what? I think I can allow myself a little excitement as well. It still hurts that Twilight would do this without warning, but I guess as far as emotional and desperate mistakes go, this one may not end up being the worst. We’ll see if I still feel the same way in a century or two.” Starlight grabbed her cloak and put it on. She still wasn’t ready for everypony to start staring at her just yet. “I should probably head back to Canterlot. I think I’ll take the train though. It’ll give me time to think with no distractions.”

“I think that’s a good idea. Good luck, Princess Starlight.”

Starlight turned and glared at him. “Seriously. Don’t call me that.”

Chapter 5 – The Solution

Twilight had set up a new research station in the archives of the Canterlot Castle. She’d also cast a spell to create a portal between the archives and the Canterlot Library. Teleporting was useful, but sometimes it was easier to just have everything in the same room. And since neither room had enough space on its own for all of the materials she was working with, using a portal to bring the rooms together was the next best thing.

It had been a week since she’d visited Celestia and Luna and she’d spent almost every free moment she had between these two rooms. After she’d returned, she’d had a bit of work to catch up on. Before leaving for Silver Shoals, she’d already spent several days researching and ignoring her other duties as ruler. It had taken her a few days to catch up with the work that needed to be done, but now she was able to devote more time to her research.

When Starlight returned to speak to her, Twilight was nowhere to be found. “Twilight?” Starlight called out. She has to be here somewhere, there’s an active portal. The thing would’ve dissipated if she’d left. “Twi? Where are you?”

“Over here.” Twilight’s voice came from behind the desk in the library.

“What are you doing behind the desk? Were you hiding from me?” But when Starlight looked behind the desk, there was nopony there.

“I’m not behind the desk, I’m in the book Starlight.”

Starlight looked down at the old book that was on the desk and sure enough, there was Twilight walking around in the pages. “Oh right, I forgot you could do that. I never found that studying technique particularly effective for me. Do you mind, ya know, coming out of there so we can talk?”

“Of course, step back please.” As Starlight did so, the book glowed, and Twilight appeared next to the desk. I just want to let you know that I’ve got a solid lead on the structure this spell will need in order to work. It’s not much, but it’s a good start. Once I have this, I’ll have a foundation of sorts that I can build the rest of the spell around.”

“Yeaahhh, about that spell,” Starlight said. “I mentioned it to Sunburst when I visited him, and he said that that kind of spell could be really dangerous and should never be attempted. He said it should really only exist in theory. There’s no way to know it can work without testing it and testing that kind of spell just shouldn’t be done if you don’t know how it’ll turn out.”

“Princess Luna told me that if this kind of spell is possible that it would have a complexity beyond anything she’d ever seen.” Twilight replied as if this somehow countered what Starlight had just said.

“Did you hear the part about it being dangerous? Twilight I hope you know that I am not going to let you attempt that spell on me if you aren’t absolutely sure that it’ll work.”

“Don’t you worry about the spell Starlight. I wouldn’t think of attempting to cast an unfinished and untested spell on you. Especially after what I’ve already done. I know it will be a dangerous road, but I have to do this. If not for your sake, then for my own.”

“Alright. I just hope you know what you’re doing.” Starlight said with concern in her voice. “Do… do you want me to help you?”

“No. I have to do this myself.” Twilight said stubbornly.

“If you won’t let me help you, at least bring Sunburst in on it. He could really help with the whole structuring of the spell. He’s good with that kind of stuff.”

“I’ll consider it. But this is something I really feel I should do on my own. I will fix what I’ve done to you Starlight. I promise you that.”

“Don’t make a promise that you aren’t sure you can keep, Twilight.”

– – – – Fifteen Years Later – – – –

Twilight struggled to stand. That time had been much worse than any of the others, but she really felt like she was getting close. Using her magic, she grabbed the notebook from the desk and dipped her quill in ink. She had shelves of these notebooks now, each one marking her progress toward the completion of this spell. She spoke aloud as she used her magic to write notes in the book, “Trial eight thousand five hundred eighteen. Result: Failure. Results seem promising at first, but the spell seems to fizzle out before completion. An ingredient in the potion may be causing early termination of the spell and may need to be counteracted.”

In Twilight’s research to create a spell to reverse Starlight’s transformation, she’d come to realize that this wasn’t something that either a single spell or a potion could do on their own. But if she brewed a potion and then cast a spell onto it, then she should be able to get the desired result. The problem was that meant the creation of two incredibly complex pieces. Luna did say it would be more complex than anything she’d ever seen, Twilight had reminded herself many times over the years.

“Proposed solution: attempt to incorporate accelero into the spell structure to decrease the time needed for the spell to complete after the potion is consumed.” Every time she felt that she had the spell structured perfectly, something needed to be changed that would affect it. It didn’t matter if the change was in the spell or the potion, it always resulted in something else needing to be corrected or compensated for. Let’s work accelero into the spell and run a few more trials.

After a few hours of working accelero into the spell, Twilight turned the page of her notebook and wrote ‘Trial 8,519’ at the top. “Okay, here we go.”

“Thank you again for inviting me to speak today, Headmare Winter.” Starlight said as she opened the door to leave Winter Wonder’s office.

“Of course, Princess Starlight. You were headmare of this school long before I ever came along. You’re always welcome to speak here.” The unicorn gave her a brief hug. “Do say hello to Princess Twilight for me when you see her.”

“I will. Thank you again.” Starlight made her way through the halls of the school she used to run. She always loved coming back here. Hearing the sounds of all the young creatures going about their day learning friendship lessons made her nostalgic for the days she was headmare here. She came back to speak at every opportunity she was given. And the students loved her. It was always a treat when a princess came to visit.

Once she’d made it out the front doors, she teleported herself to the Canterlot Castle throne room. And nearly scared the uniform right off of Captain Harvest of the Royal Guard. “Gah! Oh Princess Starlight!” She cleared her throat. “Please, forgive me. You frightened me.”

Starlight chuckled, “I’m sorry Autumn. That’s the second time this week isn’t it?”

“Third actually, Princess.” Autumn said sheepishly, embarrassed to admit that she’d been caught off guard so many times. “When you teleport into the castle, do you think you could, ya know, teleport in somewhere a bit further away from where the guards are posted? I’m not the only one you’ve frightened around here, you know.”

“I’ll consider it,” Starlight said with a playful grin. “Have you seen Princess Twilight anywhere?”

“I’m sorry, but I believe she turned in early for the night, ma’am.” Autumn replied.

“Ah that’s alright. I’ll speak with her tomorrow. Thank you, Autumn. Have a good evening.” Starlight made her way down to the archives in the Canterlot Castle; she had a hunch Twilight was working down here. As she entered the room, she saw signs that Twilight was indeed hard at work. Ten years ago Twilight had created a pocket dimension of sorts within the archives and chose to make it her new workspace. In the archives it took up the space of a two-meter cube. Twilight had told her it was a way to have a space that she could manipulate for her needs without the need to relocate from the castle or build a new workspace into the castle itself. With this, she could store everything for her research all in one place and still have room for trials.

But Starlight had begun to suspect that there might be something else Twilight wasn’t telling her. For one, Twilight never said how she planned on testing the spell. That question had been in Starlight’s mind since day one, but Twilight assured her that she’d found a way to test the spell without using anypony else. She must’ve found a way to simulate the tests and gather data from it somehow, Starlight had thought once, but she wasn’t convinced.

She’d never been inside the cube. Twilight had asked her not to go inside but hadn’t taken any measures to prevent it from happening. The cube was locked up so that nopony would wander inside, but there was really nothing to keep out anypony determined to get in. Despite her curiosity, Starlight had never gone against Twilight’s wishes in this matter. Starlight thought about knocking on the door to the cube to speak with Twilight. It’s been fifteen years. If she hasn’t solved it by now, I don’t know if she’s going to.

Five years ago, Twilight had held the official coronation for Starlight. As far as most of Equestria knew, Starlight becoming the new princess was all part of the plan and had only just recently happened. A select few knew the full story about the origins of Starlight’s wings. Twilight had never fought to have the truth kept from the public, but those who knew chose not to speak about it out of respect for Twilight. Starlight had hidden her wings most of the time with simple camouflage spells but as time went on, she did so less and less often.

To Starlight’s surprise, whenever she went out without her wings hidden, most creatures assumed that she’d created a temporary set of wings for herself with a spell. Temporary wings and cloud walking were spells that advanced unicorns could use, so it wasn’t much of a stretch to think Starlight had created these wings for herself. After all, the creatures who saw her would tell themselves, if there was a new princess, I’m pretty sure we would have heard about it.

Starlight turned to leave, unsure of what she thought she’d accomplish by coming down here. She wanted to tell Twilight to stop wasting her time trying to fix what she’d done, but she knew Twilight would never listen. I’d say, “it’s been fifteen years” and she’d just say, “then it would be a shame to let all that work go to waste by giving up now”. Although Starlight had never actually suggested to Twilight that she shouldn’t continue, she’d played the scenario out in her head dozens of times and never saw an outcome where Twilight would agree to stop.

Starlight got to the door to leave when she heard something hit the floor behind her. She turned and saw a bit of crumpled parchment on the floor just outside of the door to the cube. Where’d that come from? she wondered as she picked the parchment up off the floor with her magic. When she uncrumpled the paper, her eyes went wide. There was only one word written on it: “Help”. There was only one pony this could have come from. Twilight!

Using her magic, Starlight teleported herself into the cube. She knew teleporting into a pocket dimension could be dangerous without knowing the dimensions or layout, so she did her best to get herself to just on the other side of the door. When she appeared on the other side, she looked around the room. There were shelves at least twenty feet high filled with notebooks. Old spell books were piled high in a corner next to a desk and there was a full potion brewing station alongside a miniature field that she could only assume was filled with the magical ingredients that would be used for the potions.

Near the potion brewing station, she saw Twilight on the floor. “Twilight! What happened?!” She exclaimed as she rushed to her side. When she arrived, she was shocked by what she found. Twilight was much smaller than she used to be. And her wings are gone! Not only that, but she seemed to be having trouble breathing.

Twilight’s voice was raspy, and she struggled to get out each word as if she were being crushed. “Starlight. Notebook. Thirty-seven. Time spell. Temporio Novilocus. Variation three. Hurry.”

Starlight ran over to the bookshelves and quickly found the notebook marked with the number thirty-seven and began to flip through the pages until she found Twilight’s Temporio Novilocus spells. Here they are! She studied the third variation of the spell for a moment before attempting to cast it. What is she doing using time spells in here? Starlight thought as she examined the structure of the spell. This should reverse whatever’s happened to her, but what are these other parts doing in here? Starlight reminded herself that this wasn’t the time to ask questions about the spell, she only needed to understand how to cast it and could ask questions about it later.Once she felt confident she could do it, Starlight closed her eyes and her horn glowed as she cast the spell. A bright sphere of magic formed at the tip of Starlight’s horn and pulsed outward until the waves of the pulse had run through the entire room.

When she opened her eyes, Starlight looked around the room. “Where am I?” She asked. She looked down to see Twilight slowly getting up. “What happened, are you alright? I don’t– I don’t remember coming in here. Is this where you’ve been working?”

Twilight turned and looked at Starlight, “Yes, I’m fine now,” she said as she stretched her wings. “And yes, this where I’ve been going to do my research.”

“I– I remember you saying you’d rather I didn’t come in here. That you wanted to work on this alone. Why am I here?”

“You came here because I reached out to you for help,” Twilight said. “You don’t remember coming in here because the last thirty minutes of your memory have been erased.”

Starlight blinked as she absorbed what Twilight just told her. “My– my memory? Why would you erase my memory?”

“Actually you did that yourself. Please, take a seat and I will explain everything. It’s time I told you what I’ve been doing in here for all these years.” Twilight said as she sat down. Starlight sat down and did her best to make herself comfortable. “Oh where to start,” Twilight began.

“Can you start with what I saw when I came in here and why I wiped my own memory of it?” Starlight asked. What in Equestria did I see that would make me to erase my own memory?

“Of course. Don’t worry, you didn’t erase your memory because you saw something horrible or anything like that. It was a side effect of the spell that I’d asked you to cast.” Twilight paused to collect her thoughts. “When you came in here, I was… incapacitated. I barely had enough strength to send you a message asking for your help.”

“Then how are you fine? I’ve only been here a few minutes but you’re telling me that when I got here you were weak and incapacitated?”

“Starlight, please. I will explain everything.” Starlight made a ‘go on then’ gesture and Twilight continued. What you saw when you arrived was me as a unicorn again. The transformation reversal spell and potion worked… with some nasty side effects. I have been using a time spell to rewind time for everything in this room except for the things I’ve designated as exempt. Whenever I set the spell, I also cast a spell to make my notes and brain to make them immune from the time spell. This way, regardless of the outcome of the transformation spell, I always return to the way I was thirty minutes before I cast the spell. You weren’t written into the spell which is why your memory reverted as well when you cast it.

“Something with the latest iteration of the transformation spell must’ve affected the spell I’d placed on my brain, causing it to expand to include my body as well. When the time spell went off, my body didn’t revert back to its previous state as it has every other time before. This is the only time this has happened, and I guess I really am lucky that you were around when it did. I don’t want to think about what could have happened if the spell had failed after some of the trials that ended poorly.”

Starlight was in shock by what she was hearing. She tried to stay calm, but this was insane. Twilight has been experimenting on herself this whole time?! When she spoke, she did her best to keep her voice even. “This one didn’t end poorly? Twilight, how many times have you done this to yourself?”

“Eight thousand five hundred nineteen.” Twilight replied, matter-of-factly as if she were giving Starlight tomorrow’s weather forecast.

“Eight thousand?!” Starlight’s head had begun to spin just thinking about it. “And how many of them resulted in you ending up like this, or even worse?”

“Oh not too many.” Twilight replied unconvincingly. “Early on, a lot of the trials had no effect at all because the spell structure was still being worked out. But after that was largely sorted out, I’d say only about sixty percent of the remaining trials ended in disfiguration or fatality.”

“F-fatality? Twilight, do you even hear yourself? I can’t believe you’ve been doing this all these years. And for what?”

“I’ve been doing this for you, Starlight.”

“No! Don’t put this on me. You’ve been down here literally killing yourself over and over and expect me to accept that it’s all been for me? No, Twilight, you’ve been doing this for yourself. And I won’t let you continue.”

“I’ll correct the time reversal spell, Starlight. I just need to rearrange the spell to place the exemption after I take the potion, so–.”

“You remember them all, don’t you?” Starlight interrupted her. “Do you remember the first time you… the first time the spell was fatal?” Starlight asked her.

Twilight thought back to that first time, now over a decade ago. It had been horrifying. Even knowing that the time spell was in place to revert her back, her instincts had taken over and she panicked when she thought it was over. “Yes. Yes, I remember it.” She said solemnly. She’d grown numb to the fear after a while, but never the pain. “But it’s a small price to pay to make things right.”

“A small price?! Twilight, we’re talking about your life!” Starlight’s eyes were now streaming tears. “Have you really become so blinded by your desire to fix this that you’d go so far to fix this? That you’ve failed to see what was right in front of you? All these years you’ve spent down here… I had no idea what you were putting yourself through. You spend so much time here, I… I just want to you to come back, Twilight.”

“Come back? What do you mean?”

“Come on, Twilight. When was the last time you did anything for fun? We haven’t done anything together in ages. I miss you! You spend all of your free time down here. It feels like you’ve abandoned me in order to make up for something I’ve forgiven you for ages ago. And now that I know what you’ve been doing all this time…” Her voice trailed off. “Please. Can’t you just give it up?”

“I… I don’t know if I can, Starlight. I altered your destiny and I still feel that I can, and should, set you back on your original path. And- and I’m so close to finishing the spell, I know it!”

“You don’t get it, do you? I don’t care about the spell anymore, Twilight. I don’t want you to finish it! Especially if this is how you’re getting it done!” She took a deep breath before continuing. “You want to talk about destiny? Have you considered that maybe all of this is destiny? Destiny doesn’t always mean greatness, and destiny almost never arrives in a way we expect. As much as you don’t want to admit it, maybe you doing this to me was destiny. If I was meant to become a princess, then this may be the only way it could have happened. And if I wasn’t meant for this, well I guess I’m stuck being a mediocre princess who doesn’t accomplish much of anything. Nothing you’ve said or done would make me turn my back on you Twilight. When you first found me all those years ago, I was lost, and you saved me. It looks like it’s time for me to return the favor.”

Twilight stared back at her former pupil. The pony who she had saved all those years ago. The friend who had stood by her side for decades. The pony who just saved me from myself. Twilight began to sob as she wrapped her hooves around Starlight. “I’m so sorry, Starlight. I– I just wanted to make things right. But everything you’ve said is true; I’ve let this foolishness blind me. I carried on for far too long, but I promised you I would fix it.”

Starlight softly stroked Twilight’s mane with her hoof. “You’re fixing it now. By accepting your mistake and my forgiveness. I know one day you’ll be able to forgive yourself.”

Epilogue

Twilight had risen early to raise the sun as usual but had gone back to bed immediately afterward. She may have signaled the start of the day for many creatures in Equestria and beyond, but she wasn’t ready to start her own. She allowed herself to sleep in much later than normal and only got up again when her stomach began to growl around midmorning.

She went down to the kitchens in the castle for breakfast as she usually did but this time found that they were empty with the exception of a note on the counter from Starlight. “Come to the east courtyard for breakfast.” I wonder what she has planned, Twilight wondered. She made her way toward the east courtyard, greeting and wishing a good morning to any guards she passed along the way.

When she stepped out the doors and into the courtyard, Twilight immediately began to tear up. She knew right away what she was looking at. This is one of Pinkie’s parties. It wasn’t just any Pinkie party, Twilight recognized this one because she’d read the file. This is the party for the Thousandth Moon. Twilight’s eyes fell upon the only other pony in the courtyard. Starlight Glimmer stood across from her, also with tears in her eyes.

“I know it’s not nearly as good as it could have been if she’d thrown it herself, but I worked really hard to follow her notes as closely as possible.” She shook her head gently, “I really don’t know how she managed to make it seem so easy.” Starlight began to make her way slowly over to Twilight on the other side of the courtyard. “I was thinking we could throw one of her parties every once in a while, in her memory. Starting with the first that never got to be thrown.” She gestured around the courtyard to all the decorations and food that had been prepared. She studied Twilight’s expression, trying to get a read on it. The actual day this party was intended to be thrown had been a day of great sadness. Starlight hoped enough time had passed that that day could be separated from what she’d done here today.

Twilight slowly looked around the courtyard with tears slowly streaming down her face. “It’s perfect, Starlight. She would be proud of what you’ve done here.” The two alicorns shared a long, tearful embrace. “Thank you.” Twilight looked over at the food again and gave a small chuckle, “This is way more than we can eat on our own. What are you going to do with all of this?” She asked.

“Well it wouldn’t be a Pinkie Pie party if there weren’t a lot of guests. I invited the guards to come out in a little while, but I thought the two of us could enjoy it together first.” Starlight used her magic to fill two glasses with cider and offered one to Twilight. Starlight raised her glass, and said, “To Pinkie Pie.”

Twilight raised her own glass. “To Pinkie Pie.”

Author's Note

If the pre-epilogue ending seemed rushed, surprise! It was! I barely finished in time! I hope it wasn't too rough!