Author's Note

Occurs between the Hearth's Warming Interlude, and Chapter 26: The Royal Canterlot Wedding

Poker Night SFW

“Luna!” Elias and Nightshade called as the alicorn stalked into the room.

Her head was down, and her brow was furrowed with frustration and concern, two emotions that decidedly did not belong at poker night. Elias shot her a wide grin and waved the alicorn over.

“Come on Moony, sit down. We’ve got cards to play, and they’ll take your mind off of whatever’s bumming you out.”

Luna sighed, avoiding his eyes.

“I… I’m not sure Elias, I, eep!”

Elias refused to take no as an answer as he scooped the large pony up. Moving quickly, he slung Luna over his shoulder and walked back to the poker table. Nightshade watched with a wide smile as the human plopped down in his seat, then put the pony princess down next to him, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. She flushed red with embarrassment as she finally looked him in the face. Meeting his eyes only caused her to blush harder and she looked at the floor with a small smile.

“That was most inappropriate Guardsman.”

Elias shrugged.

“Maybe, but I won’t let you be a grump when nobody around here allows me to be one. It’s poker night, you’re going to laugh with Nightshade and I. Whatever issue you had beforehand doesn’t matter now, not until we’re done at least.”

Luna sighed again, but she nodded in agreement and leaned against Elias’ shoulder. She stayed there for a moment, then blinked. In a flash of movement, she was on her hooves, swatting Elias with her wing as she shot a playful glare at him.

“Dirty cheat, you seated me so that you could look upon my cards!”

Elias chuckled as the alicorn moved to her normal spot. She had started trying to "talk more shit" when they were in a private environment; something that he appreciated. While the alicorn was awful at it, she was trying, and while she was no Anyon, it made Elias feel a bit more relaxed when talking to her.

“Hey, if it takes a little hug to win, I’m not above stooping. Besides, it stopped you being grumpy, now didn’t it?”

Luna grumbled as she wiggled in her seat. Nightshade looked at Elias and gave him a snort.

“And where’s my hug?” She leaned back in her chair and rubbed her belly fur, putting a small pout on her face. “I had a bad day too.”

Elias jabbed a finger at the mare.

“You’re always a grump Big Fluff, so I let it slide. You want a hug from me, then you gotta win one.”

The thestral stopped her act and snorted again.

“If that’s all I need, then this won’t take long at all. You suck at this game.”

Elias rolled his eyes. He reached for his water glass, taking a passing glance at the food tray. There wasn’t much on it; a few cheeses and crackers, small fruits, hay. Nothing exciting or interesting. He sighed and snatched up a grape and popped it in his mouth.

“Says you fluff, now quit stalling and deal. I can’t wait to whip your butt, and I don’t need you stacking the deck.”

Nightshade clicked her tongue.

“Big talk cuddle boy, but you’re getting ahead of yourself. Starting bets ladies. Princess?”

Luna stuck out her tongue in thought as she stared at the ceiling. After a moment of consideration, she shrugged.

“A modification of the usual I suppose. Three hugs from Elias, and the equivalent fifty bits from Nightshade.”

The thestral whistled as she wrote the bet down.

“Wow Princess, Elias’ hugs are pricey huh?” She stopped for a minute, then shrugged. “It’s not a bad price though, and I’ll match. He is a very warm pony.”

Elias let out a long bet and stretched his arms behind his head.

“I still don’t get you two; you’ll bet money with each other, but not me?”

Nightshade gave him a deadpan look.

“That’s for two reason’s cuddle boy. First, you’re legally a kid, and technically we would be breaking the law by betting money with you. Second, you refuse to just give out a hug. We always have to poke and prod to make “Mister Tough Guy” give so much as a single snuggle.”

Luna giggled as Nightshade puffed out her chest fluff in an awful imitation of Elias. The human glared at the thestral as she snorted and smiled, dropping the façade.

“If you ask me, we should have kept that cuddle pile going forever, with you at the center.”

Elias sighed and closed his eyes. His thumb and forefinger rubbed at his eyebrow.

“I thought we said we’d never speak of that.”

Nightshade stuck her tongue out at him.

“Maybe Princess Luna did, but I sure didn’t, so buck up.”

She cleared her throat and shuffled in her seat.

“Now that pecking order has been cleared up, what do you want cuddle boy?”

Elias shifted in his seat to better glare at the mare. He tapped his fingers on the oaken table for a moment, then shrugged.

“The usual. Some “illegal” substances from Nightshade, and fifty bits from Luna.”

Nightshade made another quick note, the began shuffling the deck.

“Alright then ponies, how many games tonight?” She looked to Luna as she cut the deck in her hooves. “I know you have that meeting in the morning Princess, do we need to have a quick game night?”

Luna sighed.

“Not quick, but I would like this to remain short. While I enjoy my time with the both of you, the Zebras have started getting aggressive again, and this will be another in a long series of diplomatic meetings to ensure Equestria’s safety. Needless to say, I need to be on top of my thinking game because I am not looking forward to this.”

Elias leaned back in his chair and smiled at the blue alicorn as she rolled her neck.

“Maybe I can help you relax with a snuggle then Luna, if you’re willing to do something for me in return that is.”

Luna gave him a look that was half playful, and half eager to accept.

“Why Elias, willingly giving out snuggles? Have we truly broken you so soon?”

Elias waggled his finger at her.

“Ah ah ah, you haven’t heard my terms yet.”

Luna rolled her eyes as Nightshade shuffled the deck again.

“I’m sure I can get whatever it is you require.”

“Gryphon vodka,” Elias said simply.

Nightshade choked loudly, and the deck of cards dropped from her hooves, scattering themselves across the table and onto the floor. As the thestral scrambled to recollect them, Luna snorted in disbelief.

“I retract my statement. Elias, you do know that substance is illegal for ponies of all ages, right? It is a poison.”

Elias shrugged.

“It’s actually quite good,” he responded. “a bit more bite then I’m used to, but overall very flavorful.” He sighed and blew out another sigh. His eyes focused on a nonexistent point on the table. “Unfortunately, it is also very hard to get my hands on any.”

“Who gave you a taste Bright?” Nightshade asked as she scooped up the remaining cards.

Elias looked up to find a very serious expression on her face. Her hooves set about reshuffling the deck, but her eyes were focused squarely on him, with more than a little concern concentrated in her orange eyes. He opened his mouth to say that it didn’t matter, but she seemed to predict his words.

“Princess Luna’s right, that stuff is no joke. Adult by your standards or not, you aren’t allowed to have more, and I will find out who supplied you with your first taste. Poison doesn’t begin to describe that stuff.”

Elias crossed his arms, more than ready to stonewall the ponies to protect his friend, but the look in both of their eyes made him hesitate. He frowned and stared at the table again.

“I’ll tell you if I have your word that they won’t be punished.”

“Is it somepony we know?” Luna asked.

Elias’ eyes flicked up to her.

“Your word first. I won’t be responsible for getting them in trouble for something small, and non-important.”

Luna and Nightshade exchanged a glance, then they both nodded. Elias sighed and leaned forward.

“Anyon gave me a taste from his private flask. No selling, and there’s no more of the stuff. I got the rest in exchange for letting him play with Feather some more.” Elias waved his hand in the air. “The old bird thinks he can apply another series of enchantments, but so far he’s been unable to.”

Luna frowned at him.

“So Anyon gifted you gryphon vodka in exchange for working on your gladius, and now it is gone? He has none left?”

Elias nodded and sighed.

“Unfortunately. I emptied what little was left in the flask, and when I asked if he anymore, he told me no.”

Luna exhaled in relief.

“Good, he should not have had any in the first place, but I suppose he could have been drinking it sparsely since he came under our service.”

She rubbed at her forehead.

“As for your “offer” Elias, I shall not take it. A good snuggle would be lovely after the day I’ve had, but gryphon vodka can be deadly to those who aren’t gryphons. It’s part of the name after all.”

Elias shrugged as Nightshade began dealing.

“Maybe for ponies, but I like to believe I’m made of sterner stuff. Hell, my whiskey was about the same proof from what I could tell.”

Luna curled her muzzle in disgust.

“Indeed, and a foul substance it was.”

Elias scoffed at her.

“Bah, you don’t know. That stuff was liquid gold. It was the finest of my Earth stock, and tasted like heaven.”

“I think not,” Luna replied with an eyeroll. “It burned as you drank it, and I am most glad that you are rid of it.”

“Wouldn’t be if Book Binder hadn’t found my still,” Elias muttered.

“Your illegal still,” Nightshade said with a grin. “The one that a legal minor such as yourself is not allowed to have?”

“It wasn’t like I was going to distribute it,” Elias protested. “That’s why it was small enough to only fill a barrel’s worth. One batch could have lasted me a lifetime!”

Luna shot him a disappointed, deadpan look.

“Elias, you had secured four, five-gallon drums for it. That is far too much to drink of your “whiskey” poison.”

Elias rolled his eyes at the pair of them.

“Enough about criticizing my failed attempts at brilliance. Nightshade, are you done dealing or what?”

The thestral grinned at him.

“Eager to lose Bright?”

Elias flipped his middle finger up at the thestral, and she snorted dismissively as she finished dealing, and began shuffling the deck a final time. Elias watched her hooves closely as they moved at lightning speed. He was always surprised at how well hooves worked with holding and manipulating objects, but watching Nightshade shuffle the deck was always impressive. The mare was simply fast.

She set the deck down, then they picked up their cards as one. Elias immediately set his back down.

“Fold.”

Luna clicked her tongue and smiled.

“Why Elias, are you folding simply as an excuse to pay out hugs? For shame.”

Nightshade grimaced and shook her head as she folded as well.

“Nah, that was just a bad hoof. Show em ponies.”

Elias flipped his hand over to reveal a seven and a two, both of different suits. Nightshade had a two and an eight, while Luna had a pair of aces. The alicorn smiled at them both.

“Well well well, it seems you two have gotten better at the paper games.” She chuckled darkly. “Your newfound skill shall not save you from me.”

Nightshade rolled her eyes and began reshuffling the cards.

“Yeah yeah, that’s what you always say Princess, right before you lose.”

Luna stuck her tongue out at Nightshade, and Elias chuckled at their antics as the cards came around again.

*****

Elias tapped his leg nervously while keeping a blank expression on his face. His hand was absolute shit, but he was doing his best to bluff his way to victory. Their bets had become more outlandish and odd as the night went on (as they usually did), but if he won the next hand, the nights debts were cleared for him, he got a flask of hard cider from Nightshade, and a tidy pile of bits from Luna. If he lost… the cuddle pile would be the beginning of a path Elias felt divided on. On one hand, it would make him into the softest human being in existence, and he wouldn’t be able to so much as look at a sword, let alone swing it. On the other, ponies were really soft…

Elias mentally told himself to focus, driving away the parts of his mind that wanted to reach out and feel Luna’s soft belly fur. Now wasn’t the time. He had been on a losing streak; it was why he had bet big. Unfortunately, the deck had not been kind, and he was stuck with a pair of aces, a three, and a four. It wasn’t good, and he knew for a fact that Luna had at least a pair of kings and queens, but Nightshade’s hand was a mystery. His eyes locked onto the thestral as she chewed on her tongue.

With a dramatic sigh, Nightshade took a card, then groaned and folded.

“Unbelievable. Down two hundred bits and no hugs. What a crummy game night.”

Luna smiled at the thestral.

“It makes up for last week when you won four hundred bits and thirty hugs from Elias. You hogged him at every opportunity.”

Nightshade rolled her eyes.

“You’re one to talk Princess, you’re the one who kept him as a cuddle captive for two weeks.”

Luna snorted.

“He was not a captive, he was my cuddle buddy. He enjoyed himself as much as I enjoyed hosting him.” She turned and smiled sweetly at him. “Isn’t that right Elias?”

The human flushed red and focused on staring at his cards.

“We said we wouldn’t talk about that.”

Luna’s smile widened slightly.

“Elias, we are all friends here, and nothing said in this room leaves, just as promised. Nopony can break the spells I wove into the very walls. You can safely admit you enjoyed it.”

She shot a quick glare at Nightshade.

“As your guard captain has shown, you are as strong as ever, and at the top of your class in every physical aspect. Any worries you have about being soft are as empty Nightshade’s pocket after tonight.”

The thestral voiced her protest at the jab while Elias regained his composure, resuming his blank poker face.

“Fine, I will admit it. I had fun, but you need to win before you even get to consider having something like that again.”

Luna sighed, and her face dipped at that.

“Indeed. I raise a snuggle session coupon.”

Elias nodded and tapped on his leg again.

“I’ll raise forty bits, or a bottle of-…”

“No gryphon vodka.”

“Forty bits it is then.”

Luna frowned at her cards, then looked to the pot. She bit her lip for a moment, then visibly drooped as she folded.

“Curses. The pot, while lucrative, has become too rich for my blood.”

She looked to Elias and smiled as she set her cards down.

“Congratulations Elias, you have come out on top of your first game night.”

Elias felt a flutter in his heart at his victory, and it only grew sweeter as he laid down his cards from both ponies to see. Both ponies swore, sort of. Swear was a liberal description of Luna’s words.

“Bedswerving bobolyne am I! How the fluff did I not see your bluffing?” Luna groaned and rubbed at her eyes. “I am a fopdoodle for letting this slip by.”

While Elias didn’t understand much of it, he could understand the sentiment. Nightshade, however, was perfectly understandable, and refreshingly blunt in the land of ponies.

“Motherfucker,” the thestral said loudly.

Elias guffawed, while Luna flushed red and glared at the guard captain.

“Captain, that language is most unbecoming!”

Nightshade jabbed a hoof at Elias.

“He says stuff like that all the time, and he’s like ten years younger than me!”

“That does not excuse it,” Luna shot back. “It is part of his culture to swear in that manner, and he alone gets an excuse to use such language.”

“That isn’t fair, he’s legally a kid!”

Elias butted in before the pair actually started arguing. He opened his arms wide and smiled.

“Are you two going to keep arguing about Nightshade saying fuck, or are you going to give me a celebratory hug?”

Both stopped glaring at each other and looked to him eagerly. Luna twitched slightly.

“Truly?” she asked.

Elias rolled his eyes as the ponies started wiggling.

“The window closes in three… two…”

Elias caught both ponies as they leapt free of their seats and crashed into his waiting arms. The nuzzled in close, and Elias couldn’t help but enjoy the pair of fuzzy bodies on him. So incredibly soft. He had done this with purpose however, and after giving them both a light squeeze of a hug, he grinned at Luna.

“Now pay up you two.”

The alicorn immediately tried to duck away, but Elias’ plan worked perfectly, and she was completely unable to break free of his strong arms. Luna flushed red as she squirmed.

“Elias… this is not… necessary. I just… need to…”

Elias smiled at her.

“Pay up Princess, I’ve seen how you try to duck around Nightshade until the next poker night. Don’t make me break out my secret weapon.”

She wiggled some more, so Elias gave a wink to Nightshade, then gave Luna a light peck on the cheek. The alicorn stopped fighting and stared at him. She then flushed a deep crimson and giggled nervously as she avoided eye contact. A hoof reached out and snagged her saddlebags, pulling out a bag of bits. She slipped them on the table, then leaned into his neck.

“There are your bits Elias,” she mumbled.

Elias felt his smile slip as the alicorn continued staring at the table. He ran his hand down her back, making sure to rub the sweet spot between her wings. Luna purred and nuzzled his neck, but that depressed look in her eyes didn’t disappear.

“Are you alright Moony?” Elias asked.

Luna nodded.

“I… yes, I am alright. I am just thinking about work.”

Elias frowned. It was a half-truth, but that other half was pure lie.

“Are you sure? I didn’t do something wrong, did I?”

Luna looked at him with a smile, which quickly molded into a wider smile and a light blush.

“Of course not Elias.” She nuzzled his cheek and rested her head on his shoulder. “You shall make a lucky mare very happy one day.”

Nightshade giggled as she rubbed his other side with her chest fluff.

“I’ll say. Elias is going to get some flank with how warm he is, and those hands…” She shivered as he scratched her ears. “There isn’t a pony under the moon who won’t a piece of this.”

She purred and nipped at his ear.

“Heck, if I wasn’t busy running down Chaser, I’d try to take that fine human body all for myself.”

Now it was Elias’ turn to flush red, and the thestral cackled as she nuzzled closer, reaching out with a hoof to tickle Luna’s belly. That put a smile on the alicorns face, and using her superior weight, she drove Elias backward, causing his chair to tip, sending the three of them sprawling to the ground. Before he could defend himself, both ponies were on him, and they both gave him a kiss on the cheek, giggling as he flushed redder. Luna buried Elias’ face in her chest fluff for a moment, while Nightshade scrambled for her saddlebags, pulling out a tall bottle of hard cider.

Luna let him up, and then with a cheer of victory, Elias cracked the bottle open, passing it to both ponies as they settled against his side.