Driving Miss Shimmer (Insane)
Author's Note
Consider this story an attempt at learning to worry less about my writing and the results.
The majority of this story was written as a writing exercise BEFORE I took a hiatus for like 4 years. So consider that before reading I guess?
If you can figure out every issue in each of the little sections, you win a virtual cookie.
If you guess the make and model of car, you win a virtual head pat.
That stupid car cost $6,500 in maintenance and repairs over 20k miles... I still miss it.
Driven Insane
Sunset Shimmer screamed and kicked the flat tire at her feet in a fit of rage, mumbling angry obscenities as she did. Sweat dripped off her brow from exertion, some soaking into her shirt, the rest wiped away by her arm. “You stupid... ARGH!” Giving up, the fired up, fiery haired girl stomped around to the driver's side of her car and got in, slamming the door shut. The inside was no respite from the miserable summer heat, and the air conditioning hadn't worked since before the summer even started. Her mood worsened from the terrible combination, and she smacked the steering wheel, right on the badge. “WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO MEEE?!”
The car didn't answer, it never did, if anything it's silence mocked her.
“I treat you so well and this is how you repay me?!” Her head fell forward, using the top of the steering wheel as a terrible pillow for her forehead. She blindly grabbed around on the passenger seat, quickly finding her phone and holding it up to her face. Tapping on the phone icon, she swiped to her contacts and found the CCC Roadside Assistance number right at the top of the list. The number selected, she pressed dial and laid dejectedly against the wheel as the phone rang.
A squeal pierced the air around Sunset Shimmer as she bounced up and down. She had just received her driver's license and pretty much been given a car by her parents, it wasn't legally hers, but it might as well have, she was the only one who drove it. It wasn't perfect by any means, but it was hers, and it was a car. The bumper was cracked, the driver's seat had a torn seam, and the antenna was stuck permanently in the raised position, but none of it mattered to her, she loved it.
A massive grin was plastered across her face, unable to stop it from happening. She held the key out in front of her and pressed the unlock button, getting two chirps in response as the doors clicked unlocked. The sound of the latch clicking as she pulled open the door would be forever imprinted into her memory. Sunset slid behind the wheel, the leather creaking slightly under her, and inserted the key into the strange center console ignition. “Clutch in.” Her left foot depressed the clutch, and with a turn of the key, the engine revved to life. “Yes!"
Four years and many thousands of miles later, Sunset was in the same seat, her phone in hand as she spoke to the CCC dispatcher. She hadn't had to wait long at all for the dispatcher to answer her call, giving her hope that the tow truck would be quick to show up.
“A driver will be with you in about 45 minutes ma'am, anything else I can do for you?” The dispatcher asked, her voice cheerful in a way that mildly irked the frustrated girl.
Sunset sighed silently, 45 minutes would be fine, not like she had any other choice. “No, that's it, thank you.” She hung up and tossed her phone back into the passenger seat with a groan, or at least attempted to. Her phone bounced off the seat and hit the passenger door before falling into the space between the seat and the door sill, disappearing. She didn't even bother trying to fish it out.
45 minutes to sit in the miserably hot car and wait for help, what to do? Not wanting to stew in the same gross air, she started the car and pulled the handle that latched the convertible top to the windshield, unlocking it. Her finger found the switch and a mechanical whirring started, going for a few seconds before the top began to move, the hydraulics whining in protest.
BING BONG sounded the car, a message popping up on the central information display.
CHECK SOFT TOP
“WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?!"
It was cold and rainy, but Sunset didn't mind as she got in the car and started it, immediately turning the heat up to max. Inside her car was safe from the harsh weather. The only thing that dampened the mood quite literally was the slight leak from the driver's window seal. It was an old convertible, it was bound to have little leaks and such, and she briefly watched the droplets roll down the door panel.
Pulling slowly away from the curb, Sunset slowly made her way down the patchy, pothole filled street to get to the main road. The town really needed to fix the road, it was so bad she couldn't even go the speed limit without the front bumper scraping occasionally. Nearing the stop sign at the end of the road, she gently applied the brakes to stop, causing the car's weight to shift, and tilting it ever so slightly forward.
"AAAHHHHHH!"
A massive wet spot had appeared on the teen's jeans right over her crotch. Freezing cold water had poured in from between the convertible top and windshield frame, right into Sunset's lap. The steering wheel was getting the same treatment, and the falling water spattered onto her shirt too. Everything was wet now, and poor Sunset's jeans had been well soaked through with the icy water, leaving her shivering.
"Grrr... Are you serious?! What the hell car!"
Despite the unexpected bath, Sunset didn't have time to deal with things properly and quickly wiped down the dripping steering wheel with her sleeves. "Why do you hate me?" Her clothes thirstily sucked up the water and left the car nice and dry, but left her cold and wet.
The soft top had gotten stuck about halfway through the process to put it down, leaving Sunset grinding her teeth. She told herself to take a breath and shut her eyes, trying to calm her mounting rage before she screamed again. “Okay car... Let's try this again.” Her finger rocked the switch, moving the top back towards the up position before trying to put it down again.
BING BONG
CHECK SOFT TOP
She had gotten a little further this time, so she repeated the process of rocking the switch back and forth. The mechanical whirring and hydraulic whines continued, and surpassed the furthest point she had gotten so far. Finally gravity assisted the aging power top system, and the roof folded into the trunk, another BING BONG confirming the process as complete.
Sunset was a little cooler without the top keeping the stagnant air trapped, and she laid back, or at least tried to, the power seat made a grinding and whining noise, refusing to recline. The seat had been like this for a long time, but it felt like the icing on the broken car cake. Annoyed yet again, she leaned forward and used the back seat access lever to move the seat forward before reclining the power seatback, a trick she had used since the seat broke. Once she felt it was reclined enough, she sat back, the seat falling back and latching with a click. It hadn't reclined an inch.
“FUUU-”
Sunset was almost home after returning from Canterlot City, only a half-mile from home when a puff of steam came from the gaps between the hood and fenders. “Uh oh.” She checked the gauges, none looked out of the ordinary, and the engine gave no indications of something being wrong. Cautiously, she kept going, her foot feathering the throttle out of concern that something was seriously wrong. A sickeningly sweet chemical scent wafted into the cabin, making the girl's nose scrunch up. She knew some things about cars, but not enough to know what she was smelling, it actually smelled kinda good if she was being honest.
Pulling up in front of her house, steam continued to seep from the gap between panels, not an alarming amount, but still concerning. Whatever was happening was under the hood, and Sunset pulled the hood release, which also released a small cloud of steam. She leapt out and threw open the hood, waving a hand in her face to clear the larger cloud now obscuring her vision. The engine bay was covered in a neon green liquid, the same liquid she now noticed was seeping out from under the car, a trail of it leading down the street to the forming puddle. “Oh dad is gonna kill me!”
Sunset soon learned that she was smelling and seeing coolant, and that the source of it was a burst radiator hose that had split and showered the engine like a toxic sprinkler. The 12 year-old rubber pipe had softened and given up. Her dad didn't scold her, instead he had told her that it wasn't her fault, that it was just something that happened, nothing of her doing.
She decided to leave out the part of the story where she had probably caused it by downshifting at higher than recommended RPMs and redlining.
With nothing to do but wait, Sunset got back out of her disabled car and messed around more with the seat controls. If she was going to wait 45 minutes with no air conditioning in the hot summer sun, she was at least going to be semi-comfortable. Again she leaned the seat forward manually before using the power recline, this time getting a bit of recline when she pushed the seatback back into place. Finally satisfied with the angle, she returned to the driver's seat and again shut the door, laying back. "And now we wait."
The highway was busy as Sunset cruised along at 70mph, bobbing her head to some music provided by her phone through an FM transmitter. Her left hand flicked the turn signal stalk, signalling right as she made for the center lane. Then it happened. Her right tires crossed the dotted line separating the lanes, and a massive bang shook the car. Sunset was taken completely by surprise, actually feeling her butt leave the seat before she came crashing back down into the seat, her hair flying around as her head was whipped forward.
BANG! THUBBA THUBBA THUBBA THUBBA THUBBA
The car pulled right, Sunset countered, steering left so she wasn't pulled under the wheels of a semi-truck next to her. Her heart pounded heavily in her chest as she held the wheel steady, letting the car coast until the semi-truck had passed, allowing her access to the right lane, and more importantly, the shoulder. The car rolled to a stop still running, a frazzled Sunset behind the wheel with her knuckles white as she gripped the steering wheel.
Managing to pry herself off the steering wheel, she cautiously stepped out of the car, traffic whizzing by at 70mph just feet away. Quickly, she walked around to the passenger side of the car and looked for what might've happened. Both passenger side tires were flat, metal reinforcing sticking out of the blown out sidewalls. A pothole seemingly the size of Ghastly Gorge in the middle of the highway had eaten two nearly new tires in an attempt to kill Sunset.
Not wanting to be struck by a passing car, Sunset got back into her car and limped along the shoulder onto the nearest exit ramp, her hazard lights flashing the whole time. Now in a safer place, she inspected the damage more thoroughly, thanking the automaker for building a solid car. The suspension was fine, the airbags hadn't deployed, and not even the wheels had cracked, she might've crashed if any of those things had failed. She shuddered at the thought of the semi-truck she had been right next to when it happened, that could've killed her.
Sunset was glad she was fairly close to home, the exit ramp she was on actually the closest one to home. Pulling out her phone she called home and informed her dad of the situation, who in turn called CCC to assist. Just ten minutes later she saw the familiar sight of her father's minivan, backing down the exit ramp, two wheels in the back for CCC to put on the disabled convertible when they arrived.
Laying reclined in the driver's seat of the convertible was decently comfortable even with the hot sun bearing down on her. Sunset was careful not to touch any sun exposed surfaces though, the black, light absorbing interior was rapidly heating to a skin scorching temperature. It wasn't great, but it was better than nothing, and she scrolled through her phone she had fished out from under the passenger seat to kill time, trying to ignore the sweat soaked clothes sticking to her skin.
Sunset smiled and waved to Twilight Sparkle, having just dropped her friend off at the train station. She watched Twilight disappear into the large station building and turned her attention back to the road. There was almost no traffic, which made leaving the roadside drop-off a breeze, until her car decided it wasn't. The moment she touched the gas pedal everything in the car warned her something had gone catastrophically wrong.
BING BONG
BING BONG
BING BONG
Almost comically, every light on the dashboard turned on, flashed, or flickered at her. The radio died, along with the controls for the air conditioning, though the car was still running.
"What the… What is happening?!" Sunset frantically looked around at her instruments, finding nothing out of the ordinary. The car continued beeping at her furiously, baffling the teen. Since it was still running, Sunset eased the car onto the street and slowly drove towards an empty driveway at the end of the street.
BING BONG
BING BONG
BING BONG
The car continued to beep frantically, but seemed to drive normally otherwise. Now parked in the vacant driveway, Sunset started pressing buttons, turning things on and off, and restarting the car like it was a frozen computer.
"What is wrong with you? Just tell meee!" Sunset begged the car, to no avail. She sat and watched the tachometer idle steadily as the car began warming up without the air conditioning running. Confident the car would get her the 20 minutes home, she put it in gear and pulled out of the driveway, making her way down the street towards the highway. It took no time at all for the interior to get uncomfortable, and with the air conditioning out of commission, Sunset pressed the window switches.
WHIRrrr…
The windows began lowering, only to come to a crawl after only a small crack had opened. "You've got to be kidding me."
On the highway, Sunset cruised in the right lane at a very law abiding 65 mph, windows cracked just barely, enough to let air in thankfully, and no radio. The only sounds were the constant warnings from the car, and wind noise. Her hair was blown about the cabin despite the windows only being open a crack. Slowly but surely, she nursed the wounded convertible home, sighing loudly in relief when she finally pulled into the driveway.
The windows squeaked their way shut at a snail's pace, but eventually fully closed. With everything closed and off, Sunset shut the car off and stepped out, still feeling pretty warm despite the breeze she had. No one else was home but her, so she decided to peek under the hood and see if anything was obviously wrong. She yanked the hood release and walked around to the front, stopping short when she noticed steam. Between the hood and fender there was a little bit of steam leaking from the gap between.
Worried there could be a steam explosion, Sunset very carefully unlatched the hood and threw it open, jumping back just in case. It was unnecessary though, as only a small cloud of steam rose out of the engine bay. Upon closer inspection she found steam billowing from some vent holes in the car's battery.
Sunset sighed and grabbed the hood with one hand, shutting it with a slam. "Yup... That's broken."
A very warm hour later, Sunset was greeted by the sweet sound of a clattery diesel engine and flashing amber lights. The CCC Roadside Assistance truck pulled up perpendicularly to her into the abandoned driveway she had backed the convertible into during her attempt to put the spare tire on. She felt a bit self-conscious from the sweat that had soaked into her clothes and given her that gross feeling.
"Miss Shimmer?" The driver of the truck hopped out dressed in mechanic's coveralls, a CCC patch on it.
Sunset nodded, grabbing her CCC membership card as she got out of the car. "That's me, thanks for coming."
Waiting nearly an hour hadn't put Sunset in a great mood, but she wasn't about to take out her frustrations on the person sent to help her. Experienced with CCC, she handed her membership card over to the truck driver, who quickly looked it over before handing it back to her.
"Dispatch said you had a flat tire?" He both asked and stated at the same time, hinting at her to show him.
Sunset sighed and nodded. "Yeah, I tried putting the spare tire on myself, but the lug nuts are rust welded on I think." She led him around to the passenger side of the car, revealing several items from the trunk's roadside kit scattered on the ground. The mediocre scissor jack sat under the car in front of the flat rear tire, ready to be used.
Sunset had made yet another trip to the train station to drop Twilight off, again smiling and waving her friend off. Pulling away from the curb was uneventful, and she drove to the end of the street across from the empty driveway she had previously needed to troubleshoot a problem with the car. Going a little too quickly to make the left turn at the intersection comfortably, Sunset tapped the brakes.
The brakes didn't respond.
"Oh Celestia I have no brakes." Sunset's heart lept in her chest as she made the turn at speed, a hot flash of nervousness coursed through her. The road thankfully transitioned into an uphill section almost immediately, and the convertible slowed down with the assistance of gravity. Using the natural braking to her advantage, Sunset experimented with the brake pedal. She found that she still had some brakes, just barely, if she put her foot all the way to the floor.
Cautiously confident she could make it home with careful braking, Sunset continued her drive home. Unfortunately the next intersection quickly came up, and the traffic light was red. Slamming on the brakes, the car began slowing down, and while downshifting at the same time helped slow the nearly two ton metal death box a bit faster, it was not fast enough for Sunset. Acting quickly she yanked the emergency brake and came to a less than graceful stop behind the cars already at the light.
"Phew... Please no more red lights, please be green, please be green." Sunset begged.
They weren't.
Finally, with careful modulation of what remained of the brakes, engine braking, and the emergency brake, Sunset reached the highway entrance. Once on the highway she hopefully wouldn't need to worry about braking anymore, and if all went well, she would only need to brake four more times before reaching the safety of home. She just hoped the brakes would slow her enough to make the 180 degree turn of the exit ramp.
The highway was smooth cruising just as Sunset had hoped, with no braking required until she was getting off. A stroke of luck even meant the one traffic light between her and home was green. Pulling up to the house had never been so relieving, and once parked, she stepped out of the semi-crippled convertible. Her nose twitched a bit, an acrid scent she recognized surrounding the car, she knew what burning brakes smelled like. Sunset sighed and facepalmed.
The CCC man was crouched in front of Sunset's flat tire and held up the tire iron as he went through the car's roadside kit. "You say you bent this?"
The thick metal bar had clearly bent in some way, the black paint that covered it had flaked and come off where the bar bent and connected to the lug socket. Rusty residue coated the inside of the socket where the lug nut had refused to give in to Sunset's persuasion.
Sunset blushed and rubbed the back of her neck. "Well, when the lug nuts wouldn't budge with just my hands I started jumping on it hoping I could break them free. Then I realized it was just bending the tire iron."
"Wow. I uh... I guess I'll get the air wrench."
"What do you mean it fell apart?" Sunset stood next to her father at the front counter of the auto repair shop. The head mechanic behind the counter had short grey hair, and a mustache, and held a finger up at the girl’s question.
“I'll show you." He opened the door to the garage portion of the auto shop and walked to a table on the far side, continuing to answer the question as he walked. "When we were taking it off, the moment the last bolt came off it just came apart in my mechanic’s hands.” In his arms he carried back the grimy suspension piece from Sunset’s car. Dropping it unceremoniously onto the counter where the strut fell apart into it's various components.
Sunset's jaw dropped a little.
The mechanic continued on with his explanation. "The shock absorber is supposed to be filled with fluid, it was completely dry on this one, which was the reason you kept hearing a clunking sound." Driving the point home, he showed Sunset the two halves of the broken part that shouldn't have been separated in the first place. "I'm honestly surprised it didn't come apart while you were driving. You said it's been making this noise since you got the car?"
Looking back outside at her now repaired car, Sunset was a bit shocked she hadn't realized something was amiss sooner. She had assumed the clunking it had made since day 1 was just the suspension's old age. Even the harsh ride she had attributed to the car's sporty nature and low profile tires. "Y-Yeah."
"You're a lucky girl Sunset."
The CCC man returned from his truck with a hose trailing behind him, the air compressor in the truck noisily pressurizing the system. He tapped the trigger to test it, getting a mechanical whir from it as confirmation.
Sunset watched him get to work, the appropriate socket clicked on and he got to work trying to undo the first lug nut. Her small smile quickly began to fade though, something wasn't right. The air wrench was clicking, the lug nut wasn't budging, and she was still stuck on the side of the road.
"It uh... It's not coming off, give me a minute." Her supposed savior set the tool down and walked back to his truck, while Sunset put her head in her hands and groaned.
Driving to school after a snowstorm was always an adventure for Sunset in the convertible. Not only did she have to dig her car out and clear the driveway to free it, but the car itself was an adventure. It was a sporty convertible, and the tires didn't do very well on the snow and ice covering the roads. Still, she could handle things with no problem, she knew how her car handled, how it would react, she was used to it.
Sitting in the left turn lane at the intersection of the divided highway, Sunset waited for the light to turn green. Despite the cold outside, it was nice and warm inside the car wrapped up in her jacket. Her spirits were high as she sang along to a Hearth's Warming song playing from her phone through the FM transmitter, the holiday rapidly approaching.
After what seemed like an eternity the light turned green, and she set off, or at least she attempted to.
The car lurched a few inches before stalling. Looking in the rearview mirror at traffic, Sunset quickly restarted the car and made another attempt to go. It stalled once again. A bit panicked, she rolled the window down and waved the truck behind her around. Hot embarrassment flushed through her as the pickup drove around her broken car.
She put the hazard lights on and swallowed nervously. Hoping it was just a fluke, she tried again, this time giving a little gas in hopes of keeping the engine running. It started without hesitation, but the moment she let off the gas pedal it sputtered and died a third time. She almost had it figured out.
"Fourth time's the cham?" Sunset crossed her fingers and turned the key with the gas pedal pressed in slightly. While the car started, she now had a new problem of keeping it running. Unfortunately for her, the troubleshooting had taken so long that the light was now red again.
"Damnit!"
A couple minutes passed, Sunset playing with the pedals to keep the car running. After what seemed like an eternity the light did eventually turn green. Carefully she slipped the clutch and lurched forward, finally out of the intersection and onto a normal road. "I was literally just telling dad how good of a car you are, why do you do this to me?!"
School was still 10 minutes away, and Sunset had no choice but to continue. She thanked the traffic gods for every green light, but after getting lucky a few times, her luck ran out. Gritting her teeth, Sunset put the car in neutral and kept revving the engine while braking with her left foot. Without engine braking, Sunset had miscalculated the distance needed to stop in the snow and her left foot went to the floor. The car's anti-lock brakes shuddered, and with just inches to spare the car slid to a stop behind an SUV at the red light.
Sunset let out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding and turned the car's heat down, suddenly feeling very warm. "Okay…"
Every time she stopped, Sunset felt the hot wash of embarrassment come over her as she sat revving her engine like an idiot. She wished she could tell every driver around her she wasn't an idiot, her car was just being temperamental... As usual. Several times it died again, either due to her not keeping the revs high enough, or her footwork slipping up.
Once at school, Sunset parked the crippled convertible and left it a problem for lunchtime.
……….
When lunchtime finally came around, Sunset had asked Rainbow Dash to accompany her while she attempted troubleshooting her car. She had the prismatically haired athlete stand in front of the car with the hood up as she started it.
"Ready Dash?"
"Yeah, go for it."
Sunset started the car. It didn't miss a beat. The idle was unstable, but it didn't stall, and Sunset revved it. Again there was little hint the car was unwell, other than the check engine light and stuttering throttle response.
"I don't see anything wrong out here Sunset!" Dash shouted over the engine.
Sunset smacked her forehead on the steering wheel a couple times. "Figures." She shut the car off and got out. "Thanks anyway Dash, it was worth a try."
Back at the flat tire, the CCC man began spraying WD-40 on all the rusty lug nuts, Sunset watching all the while. Rusty WD-40 ran down the face of the wheel, staining the alloy, showing the severity of the rusting. He kept spraying, soaking them in the miracle fluid hoping to free the seized nuts. Sunset wondered if he was going to have to empty the whole can to get the wheel off.
After letting the 5 seized up lug nuts soak in the WD-40, her savior attempted again with the air wrench. The tool made several ugga dugga sounds before giving way to a welcome whirring, the lug nuts finally free. "There we go."
Sunset turned the key for the 8th time in the ignition, and was rewarded with the same sound she had gotten the first 7 times. The convertible's engine cranked over continuously, but refused to start no matter what she changed. Thankfully she was in the driveway at home, and not stranded on the side of the road somewhere. She bounced a little in the leather seat, trying to shake the steering wheel in frustration. "Come ooonnn! Start! It's too hot out for this!"
"Sunset, it's not going to start, I'm calling CCC to tow it." Sunset's father interrupted her steering wheel strangulation.
"Ughhh…"
The CCC mechanic finally had the flat tire off the car, and was working on getting the spare tire out of the trunk, a goofy looking little tire painted red with warning stickers all over it. "I'll get this on and you should be good to go, just be careful with the spare on."
"Sure thing, thanks for the rescue." Sunset breathed a sigh of relief with her spirits lifting, she was finally going to be able to make it home.
"What in Tartarus?" Was Sunset's barely audible exclamation over the loud droning of her car's exhaust, a check engine light accompanying it. Confused as to why her car was suddenly so much louder than usual, she stepped out of the driver's seat and crouched down to peek at the undercarriage. Hair draping onto the ground as she looked, Sunset found the problem.
A section of exhaust pipe in the center of the car was drooping from the hanger, bypassing much of the system designed to quiet the engine and releasing it unmuffled. The end hanging down was crusty and rotted, rust flaking off where the pipe had corroded in half. "Oh come on! People are gonna think I'm a street racer or something now!"
"All set Miss Shimmer, is there anything else you needed help with today?" Finally, 2 hours after the ordeal had begun, the spare tire was mounted to the least reliable car ever. Sunset just shook her head to the mechanic. "Nope, that's it. Thanks so much, you're a lifesaver."
"Sure thing, I'll be off then." As the mechanic climbed into the CCC truck and drove off, Sunset admired his handiwork. The spare tire was securely mounted, the car's flat tire and tools back in the trunk. She was finally going home.
"Well… It was fun, I'm really going to miss it." Sunset lay splayed out on her bed, holding her phone over herself. The old silver convertible was displayed on the smartphone's screen, the last photo of it she had taken before its new owner had taken it away. It looked almost perfect in the photo, taken in a way it was hard to notice the cracked bumper, or clear coat beginning to peel away.
It had taken a while, and several prospective buyers to stop responding to her texts, but eventually the listing Sunset had created on eList finally sold the car. She tried to be as honest as possible, but she was no Applejack, and left out a few things to keep the car saleable. Thankfully it was gone now, even if it was sad to see it go. Sunset had enjoyed her ownership, even with all the issues it had been her first car, a taste of freedom the teen had never felt before. There were so many good memories, and she would cherish them forever.
DING!
A new message on eList popped up at the top of the screen, and Sunset tapped the notification to open it. "The new owner sent a message? I wonder what's up." With the message open, Sunset began skimming it's contents.
"... Not happy… Haven't even driven 100 miles yet… Radiator exploded… Money back… Bad review…"
"YOU'RE STILL BEING A PROBLEM FOR ME?"
