Redécouvert
By Wanderer D
For Marcibel
There were many things about parties in Manehattan that Coco Pommel hated about the extravagance and waste of money that came along with the social posing and judging-looks. Parties here were a simple—yet heavy—weight and pressure to play by the rules of the elite, and woe come to the ponies that broke them. That meant that if Dolly Cadance-damned Trotlightly invited you to a "mixed" party, you went to the mixed party even if you weren't into that sort of thing.
Even if you stayed outside of the main room.
It also meant that if there was mistletoe anywhere in Dolly Celestia-cursed Trotlightly's party, and happened to be standing under it, then you kissed whoever else was standing under it, mare or stallion because those were the house rules that you had agreed to by appearing there—social pressure or not.
It also meant that if the other mare under the mistletoe was your ex-wife who you had tried very hard to avoid for half a decade, Dolly Luna-blasted Trotlightly didn't give a Discord-blessed ponyfeather if you had issues. You kissed and that was it, whether you were in the main room or not.
The tongue, hoof on the cheek, and the moan, were optional. Of that, she was sure. And yet they had all happened right there and then under the mistletoe in front of everypony.
The worst thing for Coco was that she had leaned in; that she hadn't wanted to push away, and it had taken a lot of effort to lean back and smile pleasantly to the hoots of other party-goers before excusing herself to get some air.
The Prench Balcony was just what she needed, sturdy stone, bold in its still-appealing post-modern look, and way, way up, where the breeze pushed away the heat of the party's ambiance and slowly cooled down her spirit.
'How long has it been since I last saw her?' she thought as she took in the city below from a balcony so far up a building few earth ponies would ever step on it for fear of heights. 'Since I decided not to think about her?'
It had been at least three years of sometimes bitter, sometimes wistful flashbacks to happier times. To laughter, caresses and warmth. Sometimes she smiled sadly, remembering something crazy. Sometimes she'd still seethe at words said just the right way to cause the most damage.
The only ponies that could betray you were the ones you trusted, after all. And the ones you trusted got to know all of your weak points. It was a thought that had kept her away from dating ever since. Because it had stung. Because until she was gone, she hadn't realized how much she had trusted her.
"I knew you'd be here."
Coco tensed. It was inevitable, she supposed, that after both their reactions she'd be followed by the very pony she wanted to avoid. She turned her head to look over her shoulder, watching Roseluck warily. That stupid, infuriating mare still exuded that je ne sais quois that had prompted Rarity to use her as a model for her winter line so many years ago and quite frankly drawn her own eyes in admiration.
It hadn't taken long for Coco and Roseluck to get to know each other intimately, and despite leaving her sisters and Ponyville behind for a decade, and also despite living in Manehattan, she still carried herself with that 'mare next door' allure, that she still accentuated with a slight provincial accent.
Huh. Maybe that was the 'quois'.
"You always liked balconies," Roseluck continued, not getting closer to her, but also walking to the end of the balcony and glancing down. "You were standing on a balcony when I first—"
Coco sighed, silently thanking Roseluck for not continuing. She glanced down into the streets as well, but the memories were there now, fresh in her mind. A loud set of laughs—both male and female—from one of the rooms within the large apartment broke the fledgling companionable silence, and she shook her head and looked up, finally taking a look at the dress that the other mare was wearing. It was single-piece, very appropriate for a high-end party like this, and also very revealing… which was very appropriate for a party like this. But it was the choker that drew her eyes. "Is that…" despite herself, she leaned in.
"Yes," Roseluck said with a self-demeaning chuckle. "It's my favorite." She looked down and touched it with a hoof.
Coco found herself feeling warm again, and shifted her gaze to the city. Dark and cold, with shimmering diamonds made of light here and there. She could barely see movement in the streets, this late at night in the middle of winter. But she liked to imagine it was ponies carrying brightly-wrapped presents for those they loved, stopping to admire through windows the dress they'd like their wife or marefriend to have as a gift, or choosing the right toy for their foals.
Some presents were, after all, right from the heart. "I'm glad you still use it."
"Only when I want to impress somepony," Rose said, turning to look at the city again. She rose to her hind legs and rested her fore hooves on the balcony's rail, smiling as she lost herself in the labyrinth of streets and buildings. "I'd wear it more, but I'm afraid it'll be damaged."
It was slightly rough-looking, Coco knew. The black lace was slightly faded. It was barely noticeable on its own, but the dress was darker and it made the age of the choker more obvious. The sown-in roses were bright as ever, as if kept alive by its owner's love for flowers, but even there she could also see the very edges were a little scraped. Roseluck had taken very good care of it all these years, but time gnawed away at everything.
"I didn't expect to find you here," Roseluck spoke up, looking at her with a playful smile. "When I saw you, I thought I was imagining things. Dolly Trotlightly's 'mixed parties' were always a bit too wild and too free 'loving' for your tastes. Never thought they'd become a you thing."
The warmth left Coco's barrel. "They're not. Even if you always wanted to come." She frowned and refused to look at Roseluck, keeping her eye on a flickering lamp post three blocks away that she could sort of see between buildings. It was annoying. "I came here because I was expected to show up. I'm sticking to the front room, mezzanine and balcony and I'm not even going to approach the bedrooms."
A loud giggle reached them from a few windows down and she snorted. "You, however, can go join them if you want."
Roseluck flinched. "I just… back then I thought it might be fun to come here with you, not—"
"Well, I'm not holding you back anymore, am I?" Coco said, forcing to look at the other mare in the eyes. "You're your own mare, Roseluck. Chin up. You're the model everypony talks about. The special event you did with Fleur de Lis is still brought up in conversation. Ponies admire your body, they admire your smile and your green eyes. They love the shade of your mane." She waved a hoof at the line of windows to her right. "I'm sure you'll be more than welcome in any of those rooms with just a wave of your tail."
She could see the hurt in Roselucks eyes, and she regretted the words immediately, but years of being separated hadn't brought down any of the bitterness she still felt apparently. She sighed. "Why did you come talk to me?" she asked. "You know you bring the worst in me… and I bring out the worst in you."
Roseluck gulped, pushing away from the edge of the balcony so she could face her directly.
"Why did you stand under the mistletoe when I walked by?" Coco continued, studying her former wife's face. "Why did you kiss me so readily? Why did you touch my face and…" Her lips were suddenly dry. She licked them. "Why are you here at all? You knew I would be here. Why cause a scene?"
Roseluck took a deep breath. "I tried dating not too long ago."
"Ah, yes, the pegasus racer, right? What was her name?" Coco tapped her hoof to her chin mockingly. "Radiant Smash?"
"Radiant Flash," Roseluck corrected. "You don't have to be mean."
"Maybe if she hadn't stalked me and sent me letters warning me to stay away from you, I'd feel more inclined to be less hostile."
"Yes, well, she wasn't exactly—"
"Normal?" Coco interrupted. "Rational? Inoffensive? Reserved? Respectful? Coherent? Sane? "
"I see you have been hanging around Sweetie Belle again."
"It's not funny!" Coco snapped. "That mare of yours is crazy! And a stalker!"
"Yeah, well, I broke up with her and she's not been part of my life for over a year now. She found some other idiot to fawn over and probably push away."
"Your choice in mares is questionable at best, but that one was a different level of oversight."
"I did marry you," Roseluck countered, taking a step forth. "Does that count as questionable?"
Coco snorted. "Of course. You have questionable taste, I simply have the worst when it comes to mares."
Roseluck flinched again. "Do you really hate me, Coco?"
The question shook her. This close, she could smell Roseluck's perfume and feel the warmth of her body. Her eyes were glistening, watery, but not fully tearful. There was no anger or resentment in the question, not that Coco could tell from the other mare's body language. She couldn't hold her gaze and turned away, sparing a quick glance at the double doors behind them. "Wasn't that how you felt?"
"No!" Roseluck snapped, then flinched, stepping back. "No," she repeated more softly. "Celestia is my witness, you drove me nuts. Even back then you made me so angry!"
Coco Pommel shook her head and took a step to the doors.
"But that didn't mean I wasn't madly in love with you."
She stopped. A very subtle shiver ran up her spine, settling uncomfortably between her shoulder blades.
"I was desperate for you to acknowledge me beyond saying I was beautiful and that I would make a good mom one day," Roseluck continued. "That my thoughts and my actions and my sacrifices had value."
Coco sighed. "What sacrifices, Roseluck?" she asked, glancing at her former wife. "You moved into a comfortable life, where all you had to do was to model clothes. And I know it's not as easy staying a model, but—"
"I left my home," Roseluck said softly. "I left my sisters, our store… the town I grew up with. All of my friends. I knew Rarity, but she's always been little more than an acquaintance, and then my boss, nothing more. My network became ponies that competed with me, or thought I was a country bumpkin they could take advantage of." She motioned to the city around them. "I might have as well moved to Yakyakistan for how out of my depth and comfort zone I was."
"You had me," Coco said, gulping and frowning.
"I sat down with you when you came home crying from a hard day at work," Roseluck said. "Listened when you were frustrated with how things were going, or when your projects were not appreciated. When ponies mocked you or pretended that you would be a nopony if it wasn't for Rarity. I swallowed every complaint I had about my own life to let you vent out yours."
Coco's frown deepened and she turned to speak, but the look on Roseluck's face stopped her.
"I did it because I love you," Roseluck said. "Because it was my honor and my pleasure to be there for you for whatever little I could help. Because you needed a shoulder to lean on while you kicked their flanks. But you… stopped taking me seriously. If I said I was stressed, you asked me, 'how can you even be stressed, you don't do much', or 'I'm more stressed.'" She sighed, looking down. "When you stopped saying 'I love you', or could only describe me as a 'good mare' to your friends…" She trailed off, swallowing. "I knew you didn't need me anymore."
A series of loud pops and cheers rising from inside the apartment made them both jump. The ponies inside started singing traditional Hearth's Warming songs, full of life, and empty words of empathy, love, understanding, tolerance and friendship.
"After our fight, I dated other ponies because I thought—I thought I could find in them what I loved about you. But it was never you."
Coco closed her eyes. "I needed you. And you left. I explained that I was stressed too… that things weren't right. I needed you. I needed time."
They stared at each other for a moment before Roseluck chuckled. "I guess we gave each other all the time we possibly could, huh?"
Coco looked away, her chest feeling heavy. "Yeah."
They both ambled slightly away from each other, mimicking the other's actions as they rose to rest their forehooves on the rail. They gazed at the city spreading in front of them. The warmth of the light and the party behind them, and the cool breeze and sights in front.
"You know," Coco said, her voice sounding distant even to herself. "Hearth's Warming supposedly happened because ponies learned to forgive each other, despite their pride and whatever grievances they had with each other."
Roseluck chuckled from her side of the balcony. "I'm from Ponyville, remember? They wouldn't let us forget even if we wanted."
Coco Pommel shook her head, and glanced at Roseluck with a small smile. "You know you moaned when you kissed me."
"I-I did not!" Roseluck gasped, turning to face her with a look of embarrassment. "That was you!"
Pushing away from the rail, Coco approached Roseluck slowly, and then joined her, both of them standing still. Coco's tail swung and touched Roseluck's. "I miss you."
"Me too."
Coco leaned her head on the other mare's shoulder and sighed. "You know we're setting ourselves up for disappointment."
"Maybe," Roseluck replied, her voice thin. She turned and leaned her cheek on top of Coco's head. "Probably."
"If it doesn't work out…"
"Let's try."
Coco blinked and leaned back turning to look into Roseluck's green eyes. "But if it doesn't work out—"
"We try," Roseluck interrupted, slowly leaning in, "and try. And try."
Coco swallowed, then smiled, closing her eyes as her lover's lips found her own. "We'll try."
The End
Author's Note
Dear Marcibel: This time... It IS her!
