For the One Who Has Rocks
“Twilight! Twilight!” Twilight looked up from her book to see Pinkie Pie somehow in the room with her. The crystalline doors of the library were still shut and still locked, the walls seemed intact, and there were no windows in this interior library.
She didn’t want to know. “Yes, Pinkie?”
“I need help.” Pinkie’s ears had a slight droop and her face had a slight pout. “You’re the pony I think can help me the bestest!”
Twilight stood up. Pinkie busting in on her private reading time was already forgiven. “Yes?”
“I need help with shopping for Hearth’s Warming gifts.”
“Oh.” Twilight slumped a little. While she was still happy to help her friends, this wasn’t quite as dire as she’d thought. “Well, what makes you think I’m the best to help you?”
Pinkie took a deep breath. “So I’m shopping for gifts for my sister Maud and she’s been thinking about ‘professional equipment’ for her rock studies and surveys and such and I know she wants something called a laser-induced breakdance spectro-whatever and that sounded sorta like the thing you strapped me into way back when and I figured you’d know what sort of egghead thing that is and help me buy one for her.” Pinkie took another few breaths to replenish all the oxygen she’d burned in that gigantic run-on sentence.
Twilight took that time to process the statement. “Yes… I’ve had some experience with laboratory equipment. I’ve been meaning to replace the equipment that I had in the basement of the tree when Tirek destroyed it, but I’ve really been too busy to use it.”
“Perfect. Are you free to come shopping with me tomorrow? I was thinking we’d go to Canterlot, there’s a lot of ponies there with fancy degrees who would buy that kind of thing.”
Twilight thought for a moment. She had scheduled a big sorting for tomorrow. Was there anypony she could suggest instead?
Her new student, Starlight?
“Bwaha! I have deep-seated emotional problems! Mind control! Mind control! Mind control!”
Maybe not. Spike?
“You ate the sapphire lenses! You’re paying for that!”
Rainbow?
“Ah, what’s the big deal? Oops.”
No, it would definitely have to be her.
“I suppose I am. Anything for a friend.”
Canterlot before Hearthswarming had a precise covering of snow, stipulated by rigid regulations from the city’s government. Light flurries drifted down, granting the city the precisely desired festive atmosphere. The few ponies about at sunset wore thick coats, scarves, and, in many cases, hats. Twilight trotted down the streets past numerous School of Magic buildings, and turned the corner to a sloping road heading towards the less-ritzy portion of Canterlot.
“I’m surprised we’re going to the egghead-industrial complex part of the city,” Pinkie broke in, pronking behind Twilight, “I’d have expected a laser breakdance thing to be over by the clubs.”
Twilight shook her head, then turned her neck to address Pinkie as they walked. “It’s not breakdance, it’s breakdown.” She turned her head forwards again, then angled it to look at a building they were passing. “Huh, did you know the first laser was built here? Flash Tube graduated from my alma mater about twenty years before me. He built the first laser using a special ruby, enchanted light crystals, and mirrors.”
“Flash Tube…” Pinkie slowed, lost in thought. “Eh, maybe I’m thinking of some other Flash. We know a lot of those.” Pinkie’s expression lost any pensiveness it had acquired and she resumed pronking forward.
“Yes, it’s one of the more common non-tribe-specific names. In any case, we’re here.” Twilight turned towards one of the few lit buildings on the street, a boxy structure with wide windows and a sign proclaiming “Flash Tube Inc Showroom” on its roof.
“Ooo brightly lit!” Pinkie bounced into the lobby, shedding snow on the gleaming floor.
“Careful, Pinkie!” Twilight trotted in after her, levitating the snow off herself and into a nearby janitor bucket.
“Can I help you, ladies?” Scientific equipment wasn’t normally a holiday must have, so the one sales associate had been sitting in the lobby, dreadfully bored, for most of the day by himself.
“Ooo, there’s a frowny pony! We’re here to buy a thing, so let’s get you pumped up to sell sell sell!” Pinkie bounced out of her overcoat, leaving Twilight to levitate it and her own overcoat onto the rack.
“Pinkie, let’s not get too excited here.” Twilight gave her wings a flap to flex them, she still didn’t own any winter clothes that accommodated them yet. She turned to the salespony. “Hello, mister…” she read the nametag, “...Gradient Descent.” We’re here to purchase a laser-induced breakdown spectrometer.
“Ah, well. This is the finest supplier of laser-related equipment in all Equestria. Right this way.” He trotted off, smiling the smile of a stallion that received commissions.
After a couple of turns, they reached a set of shelves with metallic boxes. “Here we go.” He trotted up to a set of boxes connected by cables. “This is the LIBS 329. You’ve got a standard spectrograph camera, a Nd:YAG laser, an analysis system - that’s got transistors now, not vacuum tubes anymore, so it’s much smaller.”
“Nd:YAG? Sounds fun to say. Nid-yag, nid-yag, nid-yag.” Pinkie giggled.
“Pinkie, it’s a type of crystal. It uses a neodymium-doped yttrium aluminum garnet crystal.”
“Oooh. I kinda remember something like that.”
“Right, anyway, my good mares, this will run you a total of 5,999 bits, plus sales tax.”
Twilight gulped. She’d gotten a cheque from her insurance for the destruction of her possessions in the Golden Oaks library, and it could cover that, but not by a lot. “Ok. Do you take cheques?”
“Certainly.”
“Well then,” Twilight began to levitate her chequebook out when Pinkie poked her in the side.
“Can we talk a moment?”
“Take your time ma’am.”
The two mares trotted a little off to the side. Pinkie whispered to Twilight. “That’s a lot more money than I thought this would be.”
Twilight shook her head. “It’s not too out of line. I’ve purchased things like this before.”
“Do you… Actually have that much money?” Pinkie’s eyes widened. ”I mean, you’re a princess, but I’ve never seen you draw on the treasury.”
“I…” Twilight leaned away. “I don’t really want to use government funds for myself. I used a little to buy furnishings for the castle since it’s a royal residence, well, technically Celestia strongly encouraged me to do that.”
“I understand. You don’t want to spend other ponies’ money on yourself. Or me, or my sister in this case. I respect that. But this was my idea for what to get her, and I’ll be the one paying for it.”
“What!?” Twilight was no longer whispering.
“I have a job and very low rent.” Pinkie’s face hardened with determination. “I’m paying.”
“Everything ok there ma’am?” The salespony was paying attention to them again.
“Yeperroni, I’m going to be the one paying for this. You said you take cheques right?”
“Yes, ma’am.” The salespony nodded.
“Do you do engraving? I mean, I’d expect you’ve got an engraving laser somewhere in here. I’d like it to say ‘Maud Pie’ on it since that’s who it’s for.”
“Did you say ‘Maud Pie’ ma’am?” The salespony’s eyes had widened.
“Uh, ya? She’s my sister. I love her and want her to be happy.”
He leaned in. “Are you associated with the Pie Rock Farm?”
“Yeah!” Pinkie nodded furiously. “Wow, you really know me.”
“The Pie family supplies most of our crystals. I can offer you a preferred partner discount on this.”
After conferring, Pinkie mouthwrote out a hefty cheque, although not quite as hefty as originally expected.
“We’ll ship the unit to her after we engrave it. It should arrive just before the post workers go on break.”
“Thank you, let’s go Twilight.”
They stepped back out into the cold of the evening, their winter wear re-donned. “Twilight, thank you for your offer to pay for me. But it’s fine.”
Twilight shook her head. “I guess I didn’t consider that you could actually afford this.”
“Eh, I’d be in a lot of trouble if it wasn’t for the discount, actually.”
“Well, I’m glad they worked with your family then.”
“I knew I heard about those special garnets somewhere. Limestone says they’re real pains to keep a consistent composition throughout their growth.”
“I’ll bet.” Twilight giggled to herself.
“And Twilight, if you’ve got bits burning a hole in your pocket, maybe we could shop for something nice for your brother?”
Twilight shuddered. “Huh, yeah. I got him another game book and he’ll like it, but it’s not really that special.”
“Let’s go! The game stores here don’t close until ten!” Pinkie began to dash ahead.
Twilight suppressed her desire to ask Pinkie how she’d known that, and smiled. This was much better than re-sorting the library. She could do that any month.
