When Two Troubled Souls Collide
Let it be known that Discord was anything but romantic. Sure, he dabbled in classic novels with romantic undertones, but to say he himself was romantic, would be saying that Rainbow Dash liked flying at a modest pace: it simply wasn't true. Being the ruler of all things chaotic and disastrous, one wouldn't care much for romance, unless it was to lightly tamper with it, but for someone with a personality like Discord, that was an occasion to be handled with finesse and care. Keeping this in mind, Discord found himself trapped with a pony he didn't know a tibbit about, all just to satisfy the one soul he didn't wish to disappoint: his roommate, Fluttershy.
It all started earlier this morning, having just woken up to the pleasant distress calls of his newest subject of the day to mess with: the local wildlife. If he couldn't create chaos with ponies and stallions, he would have to resort to the next best thing. Why, you might ask? Urges and whatnot, he wasn't so sure himself. Something about seeing something out of place, and others acknowledging and reacting to it due to him gave him a sense of relief that all was right in the world. Like a warm, pleasant sunset over the horizon.
This, however, did not satisfy Fluttershy as to why he was, in her words, "torturing" her poor friends, and how they, "didn't need a makeover and a haircut". He was no hair stylist like Fluttershy's brother, Zephyr Breeze, but he was sure he would be proud of his work if he had seen it earlier that morning.
"Discord, you shouldn't be causing so much chaos and ruckus with my cute, little woodland friends! E-Especially on Hearth's Warming Eve! It's a special time for love and affection, not misfortune and t-trouble!" Fluttershy proclaimed, having just about enough of Discord's shenanigans on one of Equestria's most important holidays.
"Flutters dear, you know by now that I can't help myself! Besides, what else am I supposed to do, now that I'm banned from messing with your fellow ponies on this specific holiday? I've already finished all of your more… interesting novels you have, including the secret stash you stored in that one corner of your room," Discord stated, the furrowing of his eyebrows expressing absolute grumpiness.
"D-D-DISCORD! How did you find those?! I kept those hidden for a reason!" shrieked the poor pegasus, nearly all prior anger evaporating into fear and distress at her exposed collection of more "intense" love stories being discovered.
"Boredom leads to exploration, Flutters. It was only a matter of time before someone found them. Just be glad a certain sibling of yours didn't find these. I'm sure he would have been very interested in the themes of some of these. Who knew dear Fluttershy was interested in those kinds of taboos?" Discord teased. Sure, everyone had their own taboos, and what they allowed and didn't allow. But for someone like Discord, some taboos to him were basically rules meant to be broken.
At that moment, Flutrershy was more than just afraid. She was petrified in terror of Discord's revelation to one of her darkest secrets. If the others were to find out about that, she wouldn't be able to handle the embarrassment that would sure follow them discovering what Discord was hinting at.
"Discord, please! D-Don't tell anyone about that! I beg of you, please don't let anyone know about this!" Fluttershy pleaded in distress, not daring to think about the repercussions that would soon follow anyone else finding out about her perverted fantasies.
"Calm your mindset, Flutters dear. I don't intend on ratting you out. Taboos to me are like the pinnacle of chaos itself, but I care too much about you to reveal something as important as… well, that, to anypony," Discord explained, knowing full well that teasing would only go so far with Fluttershy before someone had to go to the Emergency Room. "How about I go out and leave you to your plans for today? You know I won't tell anypony about my discovery, right? I swear I won't cause any havoc while I'm gone. If it'll make you feel better, I'll even try dating."
Discord didn't know why he stated these things. Likely from panic at not wanting his roommate to cry from his actions. He wasn't romantic, and definitely had no interests in finding a special somepony, even if he's expressed… feelings, for a certain sunbutt.
The pegasus, after a round of sniffling, timidly questioned his honesty, "P-Pinkie Pie Promise?"
Groaning to himself, he responded half-heartedly, "Yes, yes, stick a cupcake in my eye." And with that last word, he had written his own death wish.
Pleased and relieved with his response, Fluttershy gave the lord of chaos a quick hug before sending him on his merry way, watching him leave just to make sure he actually fulfilled his promise.
Discord had no idea what he was going to do. He couldn't start any chaos throughout the entire day, couldn't use his backup subjects, and had even Pinkie Pie Promised to go through with dating today. Filled with reluctance, he trudged his way along to the nearest diner, hoping to at least go through with his promise at least on a full stomach.
Sunset Shimmer wasn't having a nice day at all. Having been persuaded into finding a date by Twilight Sparkle, the ex-apprentice to Celestia had been set up on a preplanned date with some guard pegasus Twilight knew. Crash Sentry, or something like that. It didn't matter anyways, as the bloody colt didn't even have the galls to show up, leaving her upset in more ways than one. How hard was it to find a notable diner in such a small town like Ponyville?! Not like it mattered anyways, as she glumly sat in the diner, fiddling with one of the straws on the stand.
Suddenly, she heard the diner entrance open with a bell ring, and saw walking in one of the strangest… creatures she's even laid her eyes on. The thing looked as if he were a fusion of multiple species, similar to one of the amalgamations she had spawned into existence when she fiddled with some of the darker magic spells prior to her banishment. Intrigued by what he was exactly, and fueled by her growing anger at being stood up, she called him over, wanting to know more about what he was doing here.
"Oi, jackass, I got a few questions to ask of you!" Sunset proclaimed loud and proud, not caring at drawing attention to both herself and the walking freak of nature now cautiously strolling towards her.
Discord was well known around Ponyville, almost as famous as the Mane Six, or Celestia and Luna. Hearing someone refer to him in such a derogatory fashion brought his attention in the worst way possible, and already being grumpy from making such a bad promise gave way to a rage-induced confrontation to who called him over.
"I'm sorry, but did you just call me a jackass?" Discord questioned, venom on the tip of his tongue, warning her of wording her next response very carefully.
Sunset Shimmer was not a pony to mess with. As an ex-apprentice to Celestia herself, she could proudly hold her own against all but the most fearsome of opponents. Unfortunately, such strength leads to arrogance, which would unfortunately be her downfall, as she would quickly learn just who this beast was.
"Do you see anyone else here with the head of an ass," Shimmer spat with pride.
Discord knew his pride was on the line, and so did the one thing he thought would shut them up: a little trip to Luna's temporary home, the moon.
Teleporting both himself and the cocky mini-sunbutt was no trouble for someone of Discord's status. He could see Mini-Sunbutt widen her eyes in surprise before quickly closing her mouth in order to hold what little breath she still had. No spell she knew of allowed her to breathe underwater, let alone in space, and was too far away for her to teleport herself back to Ponyville. She knew immediately that she had no way out of this, and all her pride she previously had immediately became fear.
As chaotic as Discord was, he strictly drew the line at using his powers for killing, and quickly teleported them back into the diner after a few seconds of visiting. Even if he wasn't above killing, he had promised he wouldn't cause any mischief today, after all.
Sunset, now gasping for the air she had previously took advantage of, and promising to herself to immediately find a spell to combat underwater travel, took notice of how both of them were now somewhat mellow. Certainly a more welcoming change to them both, but one she wasn't expecting after the near-death experience she just had.
"Now that we've both had time to calm down, I believe introducing ourselves would be in order," the draconequus stated after giving the hothead a chance to regain what oxygen she previously lost.
"My name is Discord, master of all things chaotic, local celebrity, at your service," he proclaimed, snapping a shockingly-fitting tuxedo with a matching top hat to complete the attire, as if he hadn't just committed an attempted homicide fifteen seconds prior.
Sunset, after gasping for air successfully, slowly introduced herself to the jackass who just pulled such a dangerous stunt on her. "T-The name's Sunset Shimmer. Ex-apprentice to Celestia, explorer of worlds."
If there was one thing Discord hadn't expected to hear today, it was that Celestia had an apprentice before Twilight Sparkle. Hearing her bring up that bit of information sparked something within him. Confusion and doubt slowly started trickling within him, as unknown feelings began bubbling inside. Regardless of what he was feeling though, he needed to know more.
"Ex-apprentice of the Celestia, you say? Oh ho! Why aren't you one anymore? Did you relocate her secret cake stash?" teased Discord.
Being reminded of her former life before her adventures in the human world struck a cord in her. Having to relive the feeling of betrayal both her and Celestia must have felt prior to Twilight getting involved was a sore subject for her to remember.
"No, I just did something that led to me being disowned by her majesty. I had done some regretful things in the past that, if it weren't for a friend of mine, Princess Twilight Sparkle, I never would have resolved with my former teacher," Sunset responded with a distraught expression, the frown she had on her face matching the saddened eyes of reliving the poor decisions she made.
Discord was feeling a little bewildered how similar their backstories felt, if what Mini-Sunbutt was saying was true. They both had done horrible deeds, were "saved" by Twilight and her friends, and even became friends with her soon after. The cherry on top? Both of them had been rejected by Celestia, though for different reasons. Maybe… maybe it wouldn't be so bad to open up and be honest about his actual feelings to this pony he never knew existed before today.
"... Hey, Mini-Sunbutt? I… I think I know exactly how you feel. In fact, I would say that in some ways, we're quite alike, the two of us. If I were to be honest with myself, I don't think I would have seen the light of my actions had it not been for Twilight and her friends showing me what friendship had to offer. I don't know how you were before Twilight and the others got involved, but I assume you were unpredictable, destructive, selfish, and arrogant about your own strength."
Sunset thought that the near-death experience was going to be the most shocking thing to deal with today. After what she heard, that was no longer the case. Someone who knew precisely how she felt? How was this possible? Who really was Discord? That was what she intended on finding out.
In pursuit of further knowledge, her inner bookworm desired to know more about this draconequus. "How could you know how I feel? I don't suppose you tried conquering Equestria like I wa-" "Yes. I most certainly tried. Ask Twilight herself if I'm telling the truth, you know how she is. 'Friendship is magic' and whatnot." Discord interrupted, having had a strong assumption that she was going to have doubt about his claims.
Both of them didn't know how to process this information. They both knew how what the other went through, and had survived to tell the tale of their misdeeds, and how they redeemed themselves. If they were honest with themselves, it was nice knowing that there was somepony who shared similar experiences with yourself, how you aren't alone with a unique scenario that no one else can truly say they know how you have felt going through it.
Swallowing her pride, and what little arrogance remained, Sunset spoke in a somewhat-hushed tone, "I'm… I apologize for my behavior earlier. It was unponylike of me to lash out to somepony that didn't deserve it."
"Ah, don't sweat it, Mini-Sunbutt. I should be the one apologizing for my actions. I shouldn't have gone overboard in calming us down by sending us both to the moon. Just a force of habit for both of us, I suppose. Though I do wonder, what exactly made you furious enough to pick a fight with somepony like me, the lord of chaos," Discord questioned. Nopony had resorted to labeling him with such a derogatory nickname in all the centuries he's been alive for, so he had to know just what made her go that far.
Now thoroughly embarrassed by her actions, she begrudgingly explained, "I… got furious that my date never showed up. I didn't even know the guy, but the fact that they didn't even bother to show up, especially since this is my first time ever dating somepony, left me more than a little pissed off."
"Hmm... I see. Well, seeing as to how we're both without any pony to spend Hearth's Warming Eve with, would you possibly-," the offer died in Discord's esophagus before he could finish the question. What was he doing!? He barely knew who she was, and what was even worse, is that she was the ex-apprentice to the one pony he's had something equivalent to feelings for. Why was he even asking her this? Who would want to date someone infamous for chaos?
But… he did Pinkie Pie Promise the one pony who cared the most about him, that he would at least try and find a date, and he actually found somepony who shared a lot of similarities with, so… maybe, just maybe… it was worth a shot, he supposed?
*cough* *cough* "Sorry, as I was saying, s-seeing as to how we're both without dates on this particular holiday, would you… I don't know, maybe… want to go on an actual d-date with yours t-truly?" Discord offered with a uncertain smile, and the least amount of confidence he'd ever felt in his life. Even less than when he was betrayed by Tirek. As if her rejection would shatter more than just his offer.
Sunset was more than just surprised. This… draconequus, offering a date with her? Did he even know, or was aware of the horrible deeds she did prior to their confrontation? Why would she deserve a date?
Though… now that she gave it thought, she would still technically be on a date with someone, even if it was with somepony Twilight hadn't set her up with. And after all, he did seem like he had a strong idea of what she's gone through since her betrayal with Celestia. Maybe… maybe she just might take him up on his offer, as awkward as it may be.
Giving a weak, yet gentle smile to him, she looked him dead in the eyes, gave it another thought, and simply said, "... Sure."
Author's Note
I will admit, if the pacing didn't lead you on, that I was forced to rush the second half of this chapter due to having a strict deadline. If I had given myself some more time, I could've easily stretched this to over 4k words, but I'm not particularly one to fantasize the physical aspects of romance [unless it's in the sheets], so I hope this would suffice.
