My Soul Magnifies Dinky Hooves
Derpy Hooves' hooves crunched on frozen snow as she crept cautiously through the Everfree Forest, her wings folded down around the precious cargo in her belly. She followed a ‘path’ that was little more than a depression in the undergrowth. Even at midday, it was dark here, illuminated only by the few thin rays of pale winter light that managed to trickle through the thick forest canopy. She jumped at every rustle, bolting ahead to the next turn in the path. She wasn’t just being silly; it was dangerous here. Manticores, timber wolves, and cockatrices, oh my.
She was here because she’d made a secret mistake that she needed to talk to somepony about. Somepony who wouldn’t blab. She’d heard about a mysterious zebra witch who lived out in the Everfree, and hermits don’t talk to anypony, so they seemed safe to confess to.
But now she realized that going into the Everfree really wasn’t worth the risk, and she’d made another mistake. Was she even on the right path? She needed to think about these things more carefully.
She stopped for the briefest of rests in a small clearing, keeping a close eye on the foliage — not only was she wary of sneaky pukwudgies, but she’d heard ugly rumors about some of the plants here. She listened for a while, ears rotating, to make sure she was safe. Nothing but the songs of winter birds and the cold wind whipping through the treetops.
She put both forehooves on her tummy and rubbed it gently. “You okay in there, little pony bean?” she said. She wasn’t showing yet. Nopony knew — not even pony bean’s father. But she knew. There were some forms of magic all tribes shared, and most mares knew when they had a new pony growing inside of them.
“I love you already, you know? Isn’t that stupid? We haven’t even met. I hope you’re not much like your dad. He’s a big meanie.” Derpy sighed. “But I don’t know if I’m going to be the best mom for you. I make a lot of mistakes, you know? And I need a job if I’m going to take care of you. And I’m afraid I won’t be able to get one, because my vision isn’t that great, and my parents are gonna be so mad when they find out I’m pregnant, and…” Derpy choked up, unable to speak any more. Tears rolled down her cheeks, and she wiped them away fiercely with her pastern. “Well. We’re gonna go talk to somepony special. We’ll see if she can help us.”
When she stopped speaking, Derpy noticed that the birds had stopped singing.
Somewhere in the forest, a twig snapped.
“Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. I shouldn’t have come here. I’m so stupid.” She hopped into the air, wings flapping, but the forest canopy was too thick for her to fly through. Nothing bigger than a sparrow could penetrate that tangle of branches. She landed again and ran for the path. But she’d gotten all turned around when she was resting — she couldn’t tell which way was homeward, and which way was deeper in! Forget finding that zebra witch — she just wanted to go home. But which way was home?
Huge, glowing green eyes emerged from the darkness of the woods in either direction. Snouts made of rotten, mossy wood, drooling green slime. Timber wolves!
Derpy screamed, ducked down, and covered her eyes with her hooves. She’d known she was going to be a bad mom, and here she was, getting her foal killed while it was still in her tummy.
The timber wolves loomed over her. Hot breath that smelled like a mildewy basement washed over her.
“You two fell beasts of rot and wooden bone,
Begone! It’s time for you to go back home!”
A bright light flashed around the edges of Derpy’s hooves, and a loud bang left her ears ringing. Even as the timber wolves fled, a cloaked figure with striped legs appeared and herded her down the path.
“Come with me quick, for they will soon return,
My home lies near, safe ’mongst shrub, leaf, and fern!”
She rushed Derpy along with her head on Derpy’s rump so that Derpy couldn’t get a good look at her. “Are you the witch of the Everfree?” yelped Derpy, reluctant hooves plowing through musty leaves. “And why are you speaking in poems?”
“My name is Zecora, I am no witch,
But an alchemist whose potions enrich.
I swore an oath to Okapi sublime,
To measure my words with meter and rhyme.
Through ascetic trials, I hone my mind,
And… Ah! This is my home so never you mind.”
The zebra’s cottage had been carved into the base of a living tree. Glowing potions hung from the branches in glass jars, and warm light glowed through the round windows, gently illuminating the clearing around the base of the tree. Two long wooden masks with glaring eyes and jagged teeth hung on either side of the door, but Derpy found them comforting rather than frightening — she instinctively realized that they were for the monsters, not for her. The zebra unlocked the door and ushered her inside.
“Oh my gosh, it smells amazing in here!” The space inside was close but cozy, warmed but a fire in the center of the room over which a small cauldron simmered. Bunches of dried herbs and glass bottles full of brightly colored fluids hung from the ceiling. And the smells! Derpy couldn’t begin to catalog them all, except for the smell from the pot, which smelled like spicy carrots and made Derpy’s tummy rumble.
Zecora gestured her to a stool that looked like a stump and ladled out a wooden bowl of the soup. Derpy gobbled it down; it was warm and salty, made her mouth burn pleasantly, and drove the chill of outside from her body.
Derpy observed that the cottage wasn’t carved out of the tree — it had been grown into it. Even the shelves, heavy laden with bottles and books, followed the organic forms of a knothole. Derpy realized she was in a place of powerful earth pony magic. No, zebra magic. Were zebras a sort of earth pony?
“Did you make this place?” she asked. She’d come here to confess, but now that she was here she was too embarrassed to talk about it. Eventually, this strange stripy horse creature would want to know why Derpy had risked life and limb to come out here, but if she could get her talking about herself maybe she could delay that until she was ready to tell her story. “Where do you come from? What are you doing up here?”
“When I was your age I worshiped my greed,
I sought a city where I could succeed.
In Gilead far I hawked my fine balms,
Haggled for each penny and never gave alms.
I caught a fever that no potion could ease;
My friends found Okapi’s shrine in the trees.
Her priests fed me nectar and bid me rest
For three moons until I was at my best.
I watched them brew salves for zebras in need
Asking no money, as is their strict creed.
Okapi moved my heart to repentance
To be an anchorite was my sentence.
Questing to Equestria I found peace here,
All of which brings us back to you my dear. ”
Derpy blinked. That was a lot to take in. She didn’t know what an ‘anchorite’ was, but she decided from the context that it meant ‘someone who lives alone out in the wilderness’. She tilted her head to one side, pondering the rest of the story, but Zecora was waiting expectantly, and Derpy decided it was time to say what she had come here to say.
“I made a mistake,” she said. “A really bad one.”
Zecora twirled one hoof in a gesture indicating Derpy should go on.
Derpy closed her eyes, clutched her belly, and launched into her story. “Not a lot of other ponies like me, okay? They make fun of me for my eyes, and they think I’m stupid. I’m not stupid, I just have to think about things for longer than other ponies do. But I have a coltfriend. Or I had one. He isn’t very nice to me either. But I wanted to know what having a coltfriend was like.”
Zecora raised an eyebrow. “I see.”
Derpy blushed. “Everything about what having a coltfriend was like. And I got pregnant. The first time!” She thumped a hoof against her thigh. “It’s not fair.”
Zecora nodded. “Why did you come to me?” She cast a wary eye at the potions hanging around them.
Derpy’s eyes widened. “Oh.” She waved her hooves. “Oh no no no no no! I want to keep it. Which is stupid. Everypony thinks I’m stupid. And maybe they’re right. But maybe I want to be a mom. I didn’t really have anything else big I was planning to do with my life.” She shivered, even though it was warm in the cabin, and wrapped her wings around herself. “But what if keeping the baby is another mistake. What if I’m not ready? What if I’m not a good enough mom? Maybe I should give it away. Maybe somepony else could be a better mom for it.”
Zecora nodded. “It is not a choice I can make for you.”
Derpy scowled at her. “I know that. But I have to talk to somepony about it. I can’t hide this forever. It’s almost Hearth's Warming, and I’m gonna see my family, and my mom is gonna know!” Derpy leaned forward over the cauldron. “I don’t know how she knows things, but she knows things.”
“Some ponies do,” said Zecora.
Derpy looked down at the fire under the cauldron and sighed. “Do you have a potion that’ll make me a good mom?” That sounded unlikely and immediately felt bad for saying such a stupid thing. “Or something that could fix my eyes? I’m afraid nopony will give me a job. I mean, what’s more useless than a pegasus pony without depth perception?”
“Only a surgeon skilled could straighten your eyes.
I tell you -- to quest for your answers inside.”
Derpy looked around the room for boxes, crates, or casks. “Inside of what?”
Zecora pulled up a long wooden spoon and held it between her forelegs to stir the soup.
“Look in my brew, breathe deep, and calm your mind,
You will witness the things you hope to find.”
Derpy narrowed her eyes. “Zecora, that’s not a magic potion. That’s soup. I just ate some.”
“Even so,” said Zecora.
Derpy sighed and looked into the red and orange stew. Bits of carrot bobbed to the surface, then sunk back into the depths. The diffuse light of the cottage gleamed softly on the surface. Derpy watched the little highlights dance, and her mind began to wander. She thought about her boyfriend calling her ‘wall-eyed’. She thought of sitting at the Hearth’s Warming table with her family, feeling eyes on her, wondering what would happen when they found out what she’d done.
Gosh, the sparkles in the soup were pretty.
The light began to form into shapes and colors. Derpy saw a vision of a summer meadow. A handsome brown earth pony stallion with a spiky mane played with two small gray foals — the older one was a unicorn, the smaller a pegasus. The stallion had an hourglass and a ball of twine and was clearly trying to explain something to the foals, but the unicorn foal was obsessed with the hourglass — turning it over and over without waiting for either side to fully empty — and the pegasus fol kept chasing and pouncing on the ball of twine, gradually unraveling it.
A pegasus mare in a postal uniform fluttered down into the scene. Everypony stopped what they were doing and rushed over to her. The foals jumped and flapped around her. The unicorn hugged one of her legs and the pegasus bounced on her back. The stallion wrapped his forelegs around her withers and kissed her gently on the lips.
Yellow eyes, stupid expression, bubbles on the butt. Yep. The grown-up pegasus was very definitely her. Derpy swallowed. Her throat felt tight.
She closed her eyes and shook her head violently. When she looked again the soup was just soup.
“What did the potion show?”
“It showed me what I wanted to see,” said Derpy. Her voice came out as a croak. If she said anything else, she would start crying. If Zecora was too nice to her now she might flood the place with her tears.
“Fools say that what we wish is what we gain,
But seek and you may see those things again.
You are a mare who is brave, kind and strong,
What you work for will not evade you for long.”
Oh heck darn it, Zecora was being so nice. Derpy’s vision blurred with tears. “But I’m not brave or strong!” she sobbed.
“You traveled far through monsters and harsh snow
To find the path that was best for your foal.”
“Why do you have to be so niiiiccceee!” wailed Derpy, collapsing on the floor in a sobbing heap.
Zecora stood over her awkwardly. “Do you need tissues for your face?”
“Yes.”
“And also an embrace?”
“Yes.”
Zecora let Derpy sob into her shoulder and blow her nose as long as she needed to. Then she made her eat another bowl of soup and lent her a dry cloak before she’d agree to escort her home.
“I hope I have been some help to you,” Zecora said as they stood at the door. “Do you know what you are going to do?”
Derpy smiled and nodded. “I know. First I’m going to tell my boyfriend he put a foal in me. If he isn’t excited about being a dad, I’m gonna dump him. And I’m going to apply for a job at the post office. I hear they have good benefits.” She took a deep breath. “And hopefully I’ll be brave enough to tell my parents? I mean pretty soon I’m not gonna be able to hide it.”
Zecora nodded and smiles. They walked off together into the snow.
