Pinkie Pie goes to Hogwarts

by WoomyWobble

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Adventure, Harry Potter, Pinkie Pie, Profanity, Violence, Crossover, Dark, Death
Length: 68692

Drama, mystery and funny stuff all wrapped in an epic adventure! Follow Pinkie Pie as she finds herself in the magical world of wizarding Britain. Here she will find new friends, new baked goods and new parties!

Drama, mystery and funny stuff all wrapped in an epic adventure! Follow Pinkie Pie as she finds herself in the magical world of wizarding Britain. Here she will find new friends, new baked goods and new parties!

But be warned because Pinkie will face many horrors and challenges along the way and her journey will not be for the faint of heart.

(Warning for crass language!)

Published 2019-12-24 21:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2021-12-31 16:08:56 UTC

Chapter 1: Being Dead

"Ah, you must be Pinkamena Diane Pie yes?" A friendly looking middle-aged stallion behind the desk said waving her over. "Come in, come in, I've been expecting you."

Pinkie gently floated towards the chair opposite the friendly looking pony. She didn't feel very solid and yet she felt more real then she ever did, odd. It appeared she didn't have any limbs either, or a mouth. She was just a glowing ball of light. It was nice.

"Well, let me have a look at you." The stallion picked her up from out of the chair and bounced her around between his hooves.

"Yes, your time in Equestria certainly did you some good." The stallion put her back into the chair.

"Oh what am I doing? Where are my manners?" The stallion offered her his hoof "Hi, I'm Death."

"..."

"Yes, I'm aware you don't have any limbs or mouth at the moment but manners are still important. It puts ponies at ease… mostly. Would you like some tea?"

"..."

A cup of tea appeared in front of Pinkie, gently steaming in the sunlight.

"..."

"Just some Earl Grey. Cookie?" Death asked smiling.

"..."

A cookie appeared next to the tea.

"Now let's have a look at your resume, see what you've been up to down there." He winked at her.

The stallion put his rear hooves on the desk, picked up a pink file decorated with flowers and smiley faces from out of it, and placed the file in front of him. He fumbled with some reading glasses and put them on his nose.

As he read his eyebrows kept rising and rising to higher levels. He started hoofing his collar and swallowing profusely. Quickly, he sat back in an upright position. A few minutes longer and sweat stains started to form underneath his wings. He gave a quick look at Pinkie and dropped his gaze again. He turned a page and paled even further then he already had. He quickly fumbled with some more papers in the file.

There were a lot of papers in this file.

Suddenly he stood up.

"I'm sorry miss Pie, I think I need to talk to my Supervisor. Y-You'll be okay right?" The stallion seemed really worried almost like Pinkie could explode or something.

"..."

"Thank you." He rushed out his office. Then quickly returned to take the file with him.

Pinkie started humming a little ditty inside herself and zooming around a bit. Being a ball of light was really great fun!

xxx

The Death Of Ponies ran through the corridors of the Heavenly Realm like his tail was on fire. A strange sight to be sure in a place where time held little meaning.

All manner of strange and wonderful creatures stopped and stared at the odd pony. Why would a Death of all beings be in a rush? Then again it was a pony and everybody knows that ponies liked running. Maybe he was just having fun?

Death had no time to change his co-workers misconceptions. Out of breath and sweaty he arrived at his destination. A giant oak door. He quickly grabbed the brass knocker with his teeth and loudly slammed the thing.

"Enter."

Death hurried on inside.

"Sir, I believe I have a twenty-four-seventeen."

The wizened old stallion rose from his seat and raised an eyebrow. "Twenty-four-seventeen, you're certain of this?" He looked skeptic.

"Quite certain sir. Look at the file." He hurriedly gave it to his Supervisor.

Supervisor sat back down again and started reading it. Death was nervously biting his hoof in his chair barely containing his anxiety.

After about five minutes the old stallion looked up.

"When will she be arriving? You're right, this is definitely a twenty-four-seventeen."

"She's already here."

The Supervisors eyebrows heightened.

"Oh my. I hope you offered her her body back at least." Supervisor said giving Death back his file.

"Tea." Death started whimpering "I offered her tea."

"Tea? You offered a twenty-four-seventeen tea?"

"And a cookie."

"You offered a twenty-four-seventeen tea and a cookie?! While she's still floating? Have you completely lost your senses?"

"Well how was I supposed to know?! She presented like any other original soul!"

Supervisor started cleaning his glasses aggressively.

"Son, how long have you been working this department?"

"Forty-nine thousand years sir, give or take."

The old stallion led out a long sigh.

"...Still wet behind the ears." He mumbled placing the glasses back on his nose. "By now you should have learned that you always, always read the file before the soul arrives. Preparation Death, that's how we work! And by no means do you offer a twenty-four-seventeen, who's still floating, tea and a fucking cookie!"

Death had never heard his supervisor use profanity before he must have really screwed the pooch this time.

"Yes sir. Sorry sir."

"Well, let's hope that a few years from now we can all laugh about this." Supervisor stood up and walked towards the coat rack "Where is she now?"

"In my office."

"You just left her there? For goodness sake Death are you trying to get us sacked?" Supervisor grabbed his coat and his hat and stepped out the door.

"Well, are you coming or what?"

"Yes sir!" Death said and stormed off behind him.

xxx

Pinkie was having a good time. You can't exactly drink tea when you're a ball of light but you certainly can bathe in it. It was nice and warm. She started splashing around.

Suddenly the door to the office opened again. Death and another pony entered the office and saw her in the cup of tea.

Pinkie saw them staring at her, feeling a little embarrassed, she slowly floated out of the tea and back onto the chair, dripping a little as she went.

The older pony moved to the chair opposite her own. Death stayed in the corner, looking like a dog that's been naughty and has been caught. His ears were drooping.

"My apologies miss Pie. It appears my colleague has not read your file prior to your death and has therefore not granted someone of your position the respect you deserve. I promise you that he will be punished and his behaviour will be corrected."

"..."

Supervisor looked surprised for a moment. Death's ears turned up.

"Well...if that is what you wish."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"I see, you've given me much to think about." Supervisor sat there for a second staring into space. "Maybe we can move on to more important matters at this time?"

"..."

"Splendid. Supervisor said clopping his hooves together. "First things first. Would you like a body?"

"..."

The supervisor couldn't help himself. He started laughing. This mare was just to funny! Suddenly he remembered his place and moved his hoof in an odd motion. He transformed Pinkie's soul back onto a physical shell.

Slowly she transformed from a ball of light to a pink alicorn with an incredibly poofy mane, reminiscent of an ice cream swirl. She was tall and beautiful but if the supervisor was being honest with himself, she also looked a little...chubby.

She wore a white long dress that almost seemed translucent. And despite her chubbiness she nevertheless also looked both regal and kind. Her blue eyes looked mischievous and on her head sat a crown with three diamond balloons at it's centre.

"Why are you all so short?"

Death and Supervisor shared a look. "You're a goddess Pinkie." The supervisor said.

"Really? How come?"

"Ponies worship you."

"That's silly, I've only ever really threw parties. Make ponies laugh you know. They don't worship me."

"They do. You spread joy wherever you go, and you did it with such fervour that it was often times to your own detriment. To the ponies you've left behind you are an inspiration. You have no idea how special you are."

"Aw shucks, you're making me blush."

Supervisor just smiled gently at her. Pinkie clearly didn't know how to take a compliment.

"I've read in your file that you're an original soul. That means you've never reincarnated before. Most souls have to reincarnate thousands of times to even come close to your achievements. Pinkie, you really do deserve this honour."

"But what about my friends? They where good ponies too. Shouldn't they also be Goddessessess?... Goddessi?… Alicorns?"

"Goddesses. And while your friends where extraordinary ponies in their own right. None of your friends did as much as you did to spread the values that your elements represented. Or to put it in another way. Your friends represented their elements really well. You taught others to represent your element and how to spread it further to others and in doing so you became a goddess.

"A goddess of joy, baking and parties, if I've read your file correctly."

"But but but,-"

"Do not worry about your friends Pinkie. They've moved on to bigger and better things. They were not original souls like you were, and they understand how things are done. Those connections you have with your friends are unbreakable. You are in their very souls as are they inside yours."

"But what does that mean? Will I ever see them again?" Pinkie was starting to tear up.

Supervisor just looked at her with a warm expression.

"Close your eyes Pinkie," He said "and think really hard on one of your friends. Think of a memory that means a lot to you."

Pinkie thought long and hard and suddenly she started humming.

"…We're Apples together… Apples together...We're family but so much more…"

When she opened her eyes all of the apple family was just there. Applejack was waving her hoof at her, sitting on top of the supervisors desk, looking not a day older then she did in that memory. She even had her hat. Applebloom was standing right beside her, as well as Big Macintosh and even Granny Smith.

They weren't ghosts either they looked as real to Pinkie as they did in real life.

"Howdy Pinkie! It's sure has been a while! Heh!"

Pinkie just stared at her when she suddenly burst into tears and grappled Applejack into a fierce hug.

"I've -sniff- missed you -sniff- so much!" She blubbered in her ear.

"Shh, It's okay Sugarcube. It's okay." Applejack was trying to soothe the alicorn, patting her awkwardly on her neck. All of the other Apples joint in on the hug. It appeared that Pinkie really did miss them a whole bunch and had a lot of tears to shed.

Not even the Supervisor could keep his face dry at such a powerful display of friendship.

"Are you really real?" Pinkie whispered in Applejacks ear.

"Yes Pinkie, I'm really real." Applejack said smiling. "Never been more real, and so are Applebloom, Granny Smith and Big Mac."

"Eeyup."

"And anypony else you would wanna see." Granny Smith added.

Pinkie Pie was just enjoying the group hug. Being so close to her old friends was so incredibly soothing. Knowing that friendship was eternal like this felt like an enormous weight has been lifted from her shoulders. One she never realized was there.

Drowsily another memory came from her subconscious and wormed itself to the forefront. A much older memory, one from when she was just a filly.

"...Pinkie, you gotta stand up tall..."

And when she looked up she was no longer hugging Applejack but instead an elderly mare with a greying mane and a bright red coat. Applebloom, Big Mac and Granny Smith had disappeared.

"Granny Pie! It's so good to see you. Wait! Where did the Apples go?"

"One at a time Pinkie" Granny Pie said. "Don't be greedy."

"Okay Granny." Pinkie secretly knew she had plenty of memories of parties with loads of ponies if she wanted to well… have a party.

"Good Filly." Granny Pie said knowing full well what went through her grandfoal's mind. "Now tell me, did you live your life to the fullest? Did you get your Pinkie sense under control? I always worried about that you know."

"Yes Granny, I did. And I also learned a bunch of other cool stuff. Like cannons and baking and things that go woosh and -" Granny Pie quickly prevented a rant by putting a hoof in her mouth. She knew how long those could get.

"That's lovely dear. Now give your old granny a proper hug."

Pinkie did just that. "Wait how come you're old? Aren't you supposed to be young and juicy again?"

The old mare laughed. "That's because old is how you remember me silly filly. That's how that works. The memory you used makes me an old lady."

"Wait, then where are you now really?"

"I'm here, really. But I'm also a foal right now, in another world, really. It's best not to think to much on it. It can get confusing quickly."

"I'll say."

"Don't worry about it Pinkie the fact that you can make me appear like this means that my soul has grown as well as your own."

"If I may interject." Supervisor interjected. "That is basically the point of living. To make friends and to have meaningful relationships with other souls."

"So… The meaning of life is parties? Ha, I knew it! Wait, what about slugs? They can't party. Can't they grow there souls? What about the slugs!"

Granny Pie and the Supervisor shared a look. "Uhm, slugs and other such animals and most plants are what we call proto-souls. When they die we usually smash a bunch of them together. When we do that we get an original soul. One that can interact with other souls." Supervisor explained.

"That's not to say that there aren't a lot of souls that like to reincarnate as a slug, or a tree, or a dog. or whatever. It's generally very peaceful. Most souls do it as a bit of a vacation from all the complex life that happens otherwise. In fact, your friend Applejack is currently a tree on the apple family orchard. I believe it's a bit of a tradition for them."

"Oh that sounds like a lovely tradition." Granny Pie said. "Maybe us rockfarmers should try something similar? Then again, the rock life seems dreadfully dull so maybe not."

Supervisor agreed that it was a rather lovely sentiment. "Be that as it may why don't we leave this dreary office for a tour of the Heavenly Realms?"

"Hey my office isn't dreary!" Death took offence at that. "It's old fashioned chic."

"Death, your office is brown and beige. It's dreary."

"Yeah sorry Death, it's pretty dreary." Pinkie pie added

"Well If y'all are gonna tour the heavenly realms, I'm just gonna poof back into your soul Pinkie. These old bones aren't meant for walking."

Granny Pie did just that. With a soft poof noise she disappeared again. Pinkie could feel that something was added back deep inside. It was an odd snugly feeling.

"Alright let's go."

xxx

Pinkie was walking alongside Supervisor and she was ooing and aaing at everything she saw. The heavenly realms were exquisitely beautiful and as such, incredibly distracting.

"What's that?"

"That's the corridor of the skies. It leads to the gaseous worlds."

"Neat. And what's that?"

"That's a tree. I believe you have those in Equestria as well."

"Oh, and what's that yellow stuff?"

"Uhm, heavenly light? I don't really know, I've never thought to ask."

"Cool, and what's that creature?"

"That's a Skrunk. They hale from the jungle planet of Kibblebib."

On and on the questions came. During that time they travelled along all the environs the Heavenly Realms had to offer, including the Really-big-ocean and the Not-as-big-but-still-very-impressive-lake. Every now and again Pinkie would poof in an old friend to have a chat with or to show something off to Supervisor.

Time passed lazily or not at all, depending on your perspective, when they entered a lovely square looking building in the biped primate quarter. Suddenly, they heard a heart wrenching wail, coming from one of the offices they just walked passed. Pinkie and Supervisor gave each other a look before deciding to investigate. The Heavenly Realms were no place for heart wrenching wails after all.

When they entered the office, the first thing they noticed was the smell. Stale sweat and coffee. There was an odd bipedal creature pulling on the mane on his head. It had no hair anywhere else and instead wore clothes. Perhaps it had pulled all of it's hair out and the patch on his head was all that's left? Poor thing. Pinkie would wear clothes too if she pulled out her coat hair. Oh wait, she was wearing a dress!

Supervisor closed the door behind him."What's going on in here?" He asked not unkindly.

"It's all gone crazy man! It's all gone crazy! The stupid death eaters gonna 'cause the whole thing to collapse. It's game over man, it's game over!"

"Alright calm do-"

"It starts in Britain and then it spreads man! There's no stopping it! No stopping it I say!" He started raving in earnest now, about the end of the world and something called a Voldemort.

Supervisor ran up to the creature and slapped him in the face. Not a pleasant feeling, since hooves are quite hard. Still it seemed to get the point across.

"Thanks, I-I needed that." The tall biped said recovering himself. "My name's Steve. I apologize for that display. I've found myself in a right tizzy."

Pinkie stepped forward and pulled Steve in an awkward hug. "That's okay Stevy. Is your tizzy a doozy? Tell your auntie Pinkie Pie all about it. Maybe she can help."

"Who's Pinkie Pie?"

"I'm Pinkie Pie." She said as she let him go.

"Oh right, well, okay. It all started when the god of this world decided to take a break and go for some fresh scones. He said he would be right back and well, that was six – no seven thousand years ago. I've been hitting buttons on the console and I've managed to set the autopilot but things have slowly started getting worse."

Steve put his face in his hands."Geez, I'm not ready for this man! I'm just an intern! I was only supposed to learn a little bit about how the system works."

Supervisor stepped behind the console. "May I?"

"Please do."

He started to run some diagnostics. "How many souls are in this system?"

"Approximately six billion conscious."

"Six billion and you're using a world-o-tron 2000? I don't think that's designed with such a big world in mind."

Steve made a low groan. Pinkie stepped behind him and started to rub his back.

One of the machines on the side started to print a long scroll of paper. Supervisor started to move towards it when suddenly an alarm started blazing, red lights started whirring and an artificial voice sounded through the intercom.

"Warning."

"Warning."

"A level nine cataclysmic event is imminent. Manual override or divine intervention required."

"Warning."

"Warning-."

Steve started screaming and pulling on his hair. "It's starting man! It's starting!"

Pinkie moved towards Supervisor.

"That sounds bad. Is it bad?"

"Pretty bad Pinkie. Basically means that this world is about to end unless we do something."

"Maybe I can help?"

The Supervisor rose from his console and gave her a thoughtful look.

"No, I don't think so Pinkie. You don't have any experience yet with these consoles."

He continued pushing buttons and pulling on doohickeys.

"Shoot, it's already to far gone. Nothing can stop it now."

"But what will happen to those souls?"

Supervisor was thinking for a moment. "I don't know actually. I've never had this happen before. Things never got so bad for us. I tell you what, it's nothing good."

"Come on, there must be something we can do!"

"I'm sorry, there's noth-"

"Wait!" Suddenly Steve jumped up from his chair. "You said your name was Pinkie Pie? The new goddess?"

"Yeah I guess so? Why?"

Steve turned towards Supervisor. "What about a retrograde divinity injection?"

"The world-o-tron doesn't-"

"We won't use the console, instead we'll inject directly into the timeline, it will force changes that could fix everything!"

"You don't know that! And we couldn't ask such a thing of Pinkie. She doesn't know-"

"I'll do it! I'll do the retrograde… thingy!"

"Pinkie, nobody has done anything like this before. We don't know what effect it will have on the world or on you."

"But we gotta do something!"

Supervisor looked at Pinkie for a long while. The alarms and warnings were still ringing.

"Steve, mute the system please."

When Steve pushed the button the office became eerily quiet.

"Pinkie let me explain. There's a reason why the gods don't directly interact with worlds. They could lose their divinity. Not only that but once you're inside, you won't remember your friends until you return back here and because the souls of your friends are still part of you, this can have curious effects."

"But what about all the other reincarnations? They've got friends that are part of them to don't they?"

"The difference is scale Pinkie. Your connections are stronger and you have more of them. A lot more"

"Still doesn't sound very scary. I trust my friends."

Supervisor gave her a look. Suddenly he burst out laughing. "Well if losing something that other souls have worked multitudes of lifetimes to achieve, doesn't scare you, who am I to say otherwise? I couldn't even if I wanted to. You're the boss Pinkie. Don't forget it."

"Great, then let's do this thing!"

"Alright, Steve grab a screwdriver and open the console."

Steve pulled a screwdriver from somewhere and started fidgeting with the screws on the bottom.

The supervisor started rummaging through desk drawers, when suddenly he pulled out a truly massive syringe. It was about the size of a waste container.

"Alright Pinkie, bend over."

"Wha- what?"

"Sorry, that was a joke... We will need this syringe though."

In the meantime Steve had unscrewed the console cover. "Sir, ma'am, I've isolated the timeline."

Supervisor and Pinkie moved towards the console. There was only a red piece of string running between one end of the console and the other. It didn't look very impressive.

"Pinkie, I request permission to de-bodify you."

"Granted."

Supervisor transformed Pinkie back into a floating ball of light. He removed the plunger of the syringe with an audible plop. Pinkie floated inside of the syringe and Supervisor put the plunger back on. Inside the syringe all sounds suddenly ceased. Pinkie was a little nervous but she knew she could do this.

"Alright Steve, now help me aim this thing."

Together they grabbed the syringe and tried to poke the red string. That didn't work, so Steve opted to just hold the string up to the syringe and that worked much better. Supervisor pushed the plunger down.

"We'll be keeping an eye on things from this end Pinkie and we'll help you if we can."

Pinkie heard nothing of that. All she saw was redness then blackness.

Then she felt some severe awkwardness, followed by warmness and cosiness.

Wait what was the plan again?

Then came some pushiness, followed by tightness, followed by wetness, coldness and brightness.

And then she just felt like screaming.

Author's Note

It's mood music to digest the chapter.

Chapter 2: The Most Ancient House Of Pie

"Congratulations misses Pie, it's a beautiful healthy baby girl."

The nurse quickly put a blanket around the crying newborn and floated her over towards the parents, who were cooing over their new offspring. She cast some more diagnostic charms to double check and found everything to be normal.

"A healer will come by shortly to patch you up."

Igneous thanked the nurse and continued staring at his new daughter. His fourth.

"Look at that little tuft of hair. It almost looks pink." Claudia agreed with her husband. Then she smiled.

"Pinkie, that's what we'll call her. Pinkamena Diane Pie."

Igneous looked at his wife and gave her a tender kiss. And returned to gazing at their new daughter.

xxx

3 ½ years later

Pinkie was a smart girl. Mummy says daddy isn't coming home today but Pinkie knows. Her elbows were creaky.

Daddy's coming home today, so she sneaked out of her bed and waited for him in the garage. He's going to be so surprised! Daddy liked Pinkie's surprises.

…

…

…

"This is taking to long!" She said aloud, so she gathered a bunch of garage rubbish together and stacked it so that she could reach the door opener. When the door was open and she gracefully fell of the stack on her butt.

"Owie."

She realized that her daddy won't actually come any quicker when the garage was open. Still the fresh air was nice. It was a beautiful summer evening. The sun was still on the horizon, red though it might be, and it was still lovely and warm outside.

Suddenly Pinkie could hear the roar of an engine. He's coming! Pinkie jumped into the pile of rubbish she created. The car came closer now. Louder and louder the engine went.

Then there it was. Daddy's home!

The door opened and he stepped out of the car cautiously. Wand at the ready. The garage door was open but there was nobody in sight. That was not right.

"SURPRISE!"

Igneous was so startled that he dropped his wand. Pinkie jumped out of the pile and started running towards her dad.

"Were you surprised? Huh? Were you? Were you?"

"Very surprised." Pinkie's dad said picking her up and placing her in his arms."Aren't you supposed to be in bed sleeping?"

"No." She said giggling "My elbows were creaky so I knew you would be home today. So I waited in that pile over there to surprise you and then I waited and then you came in the car and then I yelled SURPRISE! And then you dropped your wand and picked me up and asked me whether or not I'm supposed to be sleeping which is clearly not what I'm supposed to be doing."

"Because your elbows were creaky."

"Yeah." She nodded.

"You're a little rapscallion you are." Igneous started making raspberries on her belly.

Pinkie started laughing and giggle snorting.

"Come on let's go talk to your mum about your little escapades."

Igneous picked Pinkie up and carried her under his arm like a sack of potatoes. Pinkie climbed all over her father with the dexterity of a spidermonkey and when they entered the living room they found Pinkies mother sipping on some freshly brewed hot tea.

"Hey there beautiful! Look what I found!"

"Oh Igneous, you're home!" She quickly put down her tea and gave her husband a kiss.

"Eww gross."

Claudia finally noticed Pinkie on top her husbands neck dangling precariously of of him.

"Now that is odd, I distinctly remember putting you to bed young lady." She scolded taking Pinkie from her husband. "You wanna tell me how you got in the garage?"

"Oh that's easy, I climbed out of bed, put on some clothes and just walked over there."

"And pray tell what gave you the inclination to do that?"

"My elbows were creaky."

"Pinkie we've talked abou-" But then some cogs started turning inside Claudia's head. Her husband was standing right here. Inside the living room very much early.

"I surprised dad! It was a lotta fun. I'm gonna go to bed now. I'm kinda tired." Pinkie skipped her way towards the stairs and crawled her way to her room.

"I'll check up on you soon so don't get any more funny ideas!" Claudia shouted up the stairs snapping out of her ruminations.

"That child's way to weird sometimes."

Igneous embraced his wife from behind and kissed her neck "Let's just count our blessings. She wasn't the only one, remember what Maud was like?"

"Yes, but that was different though. Pinkie really did know you would be home early."

"Maybe she's a seer?"

"...No I don't think so." Claudia grinned. "It's not nearly nebulous enough." She turned around to look at her husband. "I guess you're right, let's just count our blessings." She grabbed a cup of tea for her husband and they sat down in the living room discussing Igneous latest business trip.

xxx

6 months later

Claudia was worried. Pinkie was shivering in her bed. She had taken her temperature but there was nothing wrong with it. She stroked her daughters curly oddly coloured hair and gave her a kiss on her forehead.

"I-i-it's o-o-o-okay m-m-m-mum. I-i-it d-d-d-doesn't h-h-hurt. I-i-i-t's j-just a w-w-weird f-f-feeling."

Claudia Smiled wanly at Pinkie.

There was a knock on the door.

"You can come in."

Maud entered the room holding a dish with some fruit, a sandwich and a glass of milk.

"I've made breakfast."

"That's very thoughtful of you Maud. Thank you."

Maud placed the food on the bedside table and sat next her mother.

Silence settled in the room accept for Pinkies rattling against her bed. They sat like that for quite a while Claudia stroking Pinkies hair. When suddenly the shaking finally stopped.

"Wow, I don't know what that was but it was a doozy. I'll have that breakfast now." She gulped the food down faster then was humanly possible.

Maud and Claudia sat looking at their youngest family member looking a little flabbergasted.

"Are you okay now Pinkie?" Maud asked. "Is it over?"

Pinkie shrugged. "I tell you what, I want out of this bed though. Let's go bake a cake!" she couldn't explain it but she was feeling a nervous energy that could only be resolved through the creation of baked goods. With a snap of her wrist she removed the comforter and jumped out of bed. Ready to seize the day.

xxx

It was going to be an old fashioned apple pie. filled to the brim with delicious apples, raisins, cinnamon and the secret ingredient: other.

First she diced the apples in tiny little bits. In the meantime Maud was working the dough. Maud was good at that. She was really strong. Claudia kept a close eye on Pinkie making sure she was safe with the knife. It didn't matter, Pinkie knew what she was doing.

Once everything was sliced, diced, mixed and kneaded it was time for assembly. First though the pie bottom had to be set. Fifteen minutes in the oven it shall go. This way the filling wouldn't soak through the bottom all that delicious juicy goodness when it starts baking.

After that was done they put the filling in. After that they covered the filling with strips of dough and weaved them over and under. And then it was time to put it in the oven for realsies this time.

Pinkie and Maud where sitting in front of the oven looking in. This was the most exciting bit. When you could see the dough turn that delicious golden brown and the smell of home baking filled the whole house. Mabel and Lime, Pinkies other sisters, came barrelling in from the living room.

"Pinkie!" Lime shouted."Are you baking again?!"

"Uh huh." Pinkie responded to Lime distractedly, her gaze intent on the oven.

Mabel and Lime sat beside Pinkie and Maud.

"Tell us again about the oven Pinkie."

"The oven is a mysterious devise that turns ordinary household foodstuffs into delicious cakes and pies. It was used since ancient times and may in fact be the oldest cooking method there is. For the ancient ones knew that the application of heat on dough and sweet fruits was the way to go."

"The butter would melt, the eggs would solidify, the sugar would dissolve and the flour would just sort of hold it all together. The perfect harmony of crunchy, chewy, sweet and sour are all at our fingertips with this wonderful machine."

Pinkie started stroking the oven gently. "This particular model has a maximum temperature of 350 degrees Celsius. That's 662 degrees Fahrenheit. It has a self-cleaning function and the interior is lined with a stainless steel alloy capable of withstanding extreme temperatures."

"When it is baking a pie like it is now only the outer heating elements will turn on. This allows for even heat distribution and makes certain that the pie will bake evenly all the way through."

All the Pie sisters gave a satisfied sigh.

Pinkie loved reciting the infomercial.

Once the oven made a satisfying ding noise the pie was ready. Lime placed it in the windowsill when she noticed something.

"Girls it's snowing!"

A desperate struggle ensued wherein four girls desperately tried to look outside a window while making sure that the pie stays in place. Followed by quickly scurrying towards the door and putting on jackets, scarfs, hats and mittens.

Claudia made sure everybody was wrapped up nice and snug and decided that you know what? It's a nice day, might as well join 'm for a bit of winter revelry. And this way she could keep an eye on Pinkie.

And so it happened on this lovely day that four children and their mother started a snowball fight that escalated into a great snowball war with every member of the Pie family on the estate. Snowmen where made and transfigured, forts where built and reinforced, cannons out of seemingly nowhere fired great dollops of snow at the different factions. "The Great Scuffle" as it was called lasted well into the sunset. Claudia was about to call the girls, when she heard something.

From the western hills a strange otherworldly howling sounded across the estate. Everybody who heard it stopped and listened. It was a beautiful moment in the early evening moonlight. The moment got disturbed however by the sound of an engine in full throttle.

Pinkie knew that sound. It was daddy's car! The sound was coming closer quickly as did the strange musical howling. There was a tension building in the air. When Pinkie looked at her mother for assurances, she did not find them. Her mother looked scared.

When her father rounded the corner and came speeding towards them, she saw what caused her fear.

They looked vaguely like wolves, only they had far too many eyes and far too many mouth's that had far too many teeth. The wolves didn't seem to run as to glide across the snow.

"Bombarda!"

Her mother didn't hesitate as her spell flew true, yet the creature she was aiming for seemed to disintegrate, letting the spell fly right through it. He reformed seconds later none the worse for wear.

The spell exploded harmlessly behind.

"Shit."

Pinkie never heard her mother swear before. Her mother picked her up in one arm. With the other she was flinging spells towards the creatures. Other adults where taking her example and started casting magic of their own.

"Girls get in the house!" Claudia kicked in the door. Right at that moment her father came sliding in and crashed the car against the tree in the front garden. The airbags popped and he was trapped in the crumpled car. The creatures where upon his car like vultures upon carrion.

"WHY! DADDY!" Pinkie's shrill cry echoed over the estate.

Claudia threw Pinkie inside the house and ran towards the demons casting terrible magic Pinkie never thought possible, surely mummy would protect them?

Maud caught Pinkie with both arms, put her on the ground, and shut the door.

"No! Mum and dad are still out there!" Lime shouted at her sister. "We have to go sa-"

One of the windows exploded inward and one of the creatures grabbed Lime by the throat and bit.

Blood. To much blood. Lime was dying. Pinkie knew it with a certainty that only death could bring.

Mabel was next, the creature didn't even try to eat them it was death they wanted.

The wolf started to move towards Maud but Pinkie was faster. She grabbed the pie from the windowsill and threw it at the foul thing with all the strength her four year old body could muster.

The pie wobbled through the air but struck the creature right in it's many eyes, and where none of the spells proved useful, a piece of pie seemed to do the trick.

An otherworldly howl rang through the house as the wolf creature tried to get the pie out of it's eyes.

"Run Pinkie!" Maud threw a vase through the window on the opposite side."Run!" Maud grabbed Pinkie and helped her climb through the window. "Go!"

Pinkie wasn't brave. She knew that. She wanted to stay with Maud but she was to scared. So she ran.

She ran. She ran. She ran. Passing burning houses and trees. Towards the sea, sight blurred with tears..

She could still hear the creatures behind her howling and following. When she reached the sea, exhausted and with raggedy breath. The creatures were closing in on her. She just wanted to be somewhere else.

She fell on her knees in the cold salty water.

Anywhere else.

And with a loud crack she disappeared.

Author's Note

It's music to ruminate on the chapter.

Chapter 4: Seven Years Later

Albus Wulfric Brian Dumbledore sat behind his desk staring at a letter.

Pinkamena Diane Pie

Happy Oaks Orphanage

Female Dormitory

Middlemost Bed

The letter sat on top of the muggleborn stack but Albus wondered about that last name and hoped.

Fawkes his phoenix chirped and flew around for a moment deciding to land on the desk stationary asking for scratches. Albus obliged him.

He was interrupted from his musing by a knock at the door. It was his deputy the gargoyle informed him and quickly bid her entry in his office.

"Morning Albus." She walked to his desk. "Are these the ones for me?"

"Indeed they are Minerva. Though I wondered if you would allow me the privilege of taking one of your hands."

Minerva McGonagall looked a little surprised. It was a long time since Dumbledore went to visit a muggleborn.

"Do you want Harry Potter?" She looked sternly over her glasses "It's not very decent to pretend you care now."

Albus gave her a look. "You know as well as I do that there was no other option. Do you really believe that I did not try? Who was left to take him in? Remus? Lucius would have him under his control before you can say 'werewolf.' The longbottoms? I feared they would not be safe and those fears proved prophetic."

"I would have taken him!"

His gaze softened "I know you would have. And you would be good for him. But it would be far to easy for Lucius to claim favouritism. Or to hound you very for every little slight. An army of solicitors and practically infinite amounts of money give a man power and the truth of the matter is despite my many titles I do not have nearly as much. Only secrecy could keep him safe. This I know."

"… I'm sorry."

"Save your breath for cooling your porridge Minerva." He said gently "Truth is… I've felt quite similar lately. I keep thinking, maybe there was something I missed, maybe there is someone. But there never is."

Albus turned his gaze towards the letter he was reading.

"It's this one actually." He handed her the letter. "The last time I had to go to an orphanage is sadly seared into my memory." Albus looked away for a second. "I'd like to make sure the circumstances are not similar."

Minerva sighed. "I understand. Still who did you have in mind for Harry?"

"I thought Hagrid could be a fun option. He is after all, quite magical."

"True, but he's hardly the most responsible..."

"Agreed, I shall talk with Hagrid after, should he have left something out, I can make arrangements then."

"I still find it hard to stomach that we put Harry with those muggles." She conjured a chair and sat down. She eyed the bowl of lemon drops and took one.

Albus opened his desk drawer and gave his phoenix an owl treat.

"I know Minerva. I know." He scratched his beard for a moment. "Let us make certain that his days here at Hogwarts at least, will be spectacular."

xxx

Albus stood in front of the orphanage in his flamboyant robes. He hoped it would get a good laugh from the children. Looking around the front yard he didn't see anything untoward. It maybe needed a little weeding but it was hardly a disaster area. The whole place felt old but cared for.

The telltale tingle of magic was certainly prevalent in the air. There was no doubt that someone magical lived here.

Having dallied long enough Albus decided to ring the doorbell.

Instead of the pitter-patter of people rushing for the door, the door instead opened with an eerie creaking. The hallway ahead was dark and ominous...

Instantly alert, Albus drew his wand and slowly moved into the darkness. There was another door ahead and he decided to cast a silent homenum revelio. The results made no sense whatsoever. He proceeded with caution.

Slowly he lowered the door handle and entered the orphanage proper.

"SURPRISE!" sixteen voices shouted in unison. From the ceiling loud popping noises where heard and confetti fell down like rain.

Getting startled so completely caused Albus to throw his wand in the air. As he did so he noticed an enormous banner spreading from wall to wall. WELCOME NEW FRIEND! It said in big colourful letters.

In front of him was a girl balancing on an odd bicycle with only a singular green wheel. A unicycle? She had a red bulb on her nose and she was juggling what looked like small baked goods.

Her hair was a very distinct colour and he noticed that she caught his wand with ease and was juggling it with the same grace as the other items.

"Hi, welcome to Happy Oaks!" she said. "You're a little older then our usual guests but I'm sure we can find a place for you."

"I don't think he's here to be a resident Pinkie." An older lady spoke.

"Aw, that's too bad. I wonder why he triggered my Pinkie-sense. Hey do you want a cupcake? I think I got one that fits your jammies."

Albus recovered from his freight quickly and smiled. "How could I refuse? Especially after such a welcome."

One of the other children threw a plate at Pinkie all the way from the kitchen. She caught it deftly and gave it to Albus, cupcake included.

Albus noticed that the cupcake indeed had the same pattern as his robes had. Purple with yellow moons. He took a great big bite and for a brief flash, remembered all the good things in his life. His friendships with his teaching staff, his joy of teaching, his love for muggle candy and so many more other things both small and big. This was no ordinary piece of confection. He finished the remainder and felt... oddly privileged.

"I can say without a shadow of a doubt that that was the best cupcake I've ever tasted."

The fact that it was the first cupcake he ever tasted need not be mentioned.

"Yay!" Pinkie squealed and threw the remaining cupcakes to all the other residents. It appeared that this was some sort of tradition as all the children of the Happy Oaks Orphanage soon went there separate ways after that.

Pinkie rode her odd contraption outside following a couple of other children. She stumbled a bit on the doorstep but she made do.

Albus extended his hand toward the matron of the orphanage. "Hello, my name is Albus Dumbledore. I'm the headmaster at Hogwarts school of Witchcraft and Wizardry."

She went up and shook his hand. "Hi, I'm Maddie and I run things here at Happy Oaks. Did you say witchcraft and wizardry?"

"Indeed I did. Perhaps it would be best if we took a seat?"

"Yes, of course. Did Pinkie sent you a letter?" Maddie asked as Albus sat down and she went to grab them some tea to wash that cupcake down with.

"Ah no, but I am here because of Pinkamena. Tell me have you ever noticed anything strange about her? Did she ever made odd things happen?"

Maddie put the tea in front of Albus, gave him a look and then she burst out in laughter. He looked a little lost and when Maddie looked up she burst in laughter again. A full on belly laugh.

"I'm sorry sir. I'm sorry." She said hiccuping as she sat down "Yes I do believe we have noticed a little adherence to the strange. She calls it her Pinkie sense. We have grown to trust it here at Happy Oaks."

"Oh really? Could you give an example?"

"Well, for one thing she always knows when there is going to be a new resident. She would say that's she's going to make a new friend on such and such day. In fact, that's how we gave you your little surprise party."

"How extraordinary."

"Quite. We've just decided to accept it. Any attempt at testing it have proven fruitless anyway. To be honest at first I thought she was reading my correspondence somehow but that turned out not to be the case."

"What about her other schooling? Any problems? Bullying?" Albus took a sip from his tea. It was rather delicious. Some sort of fruity aftertaste.

"No, she's friends with pretty much everybody. But perhaps it's best you told me why you're here and your interest in Pinkie Pie."

"Right, I'm so sorry it has been a while since I did one of these. Let me start over. In fact maybe it is best if we invited Pinkamena here with us? She could probably corroborate what I will reveal and-"

"I'm here!" Pinkie jumped out of a potted plant and startling Albus into dropping his tea on his robes. She placed the plant back in it's pot and removing some dirt from her hair.

After the initial adrenaline spike Albus started thinking about what he'd just seen. He could've sworn he saw Pinkie going away with the other kids. So how did she get out of a potted plant of all things. One smaller then she was no less.

Magic is truly a wondrous thing.

Maddie however simply shook her head in resignation. She'd seen weirder.

"I'm sorry about your tea!"

Recovering quickly Albus removed his wand from his robe. "That is alright Pinkie. Please observe." and cleared the beverage from his person with a spell.

"Tadaa."

Pinkie started applauding "Whoo-hoo! Well done! Encore Encore!"

"Alright let us do one more spell." He turned his teacup into a brightly coloured newt.

"Cool!"

"You will one day be able to do the same. You are a witch Pinkie." The newt scurried away and climbed up the wall.

"Well I knew that! Just couldn't tell now could I. Because of the statue."

"The statute Pinkie." Hold on. If Pinkie already knows about magic then chances are that she was in fact part of the wizarding Pie family. Albus made a mental note to ask about that later.

"Excuse me, what statute?"

Albus proceeded to explain everything there was to know about the magical world. He told Maddie about the need for secrecy, about purebloods and prejudices. Pinkie made a fart noise. He told them about Hogwarts and Diagon Alley. Maddie asked if the other children where allowed to know about magic. They were, because Pinkie considered them her family.

"I understand this is all rather much to take in. Because of that I have brought some folders for everyone to peruse at their leisure." Albus removed some from his robes and gave them to Maddie.

"Oh, the pictures are moving. That's lovely." They had title's like: 'Welcome to the magical world.' and 'So your sister's a witch.'

Albus smiled at her. He always enjoyed those little moments when people discovered magic for the first time. "Indeed, now we need to set a date for me to take you to Diagon Alley to get your school supplies. How are you next Saturday?"

"I'm afraid we can't next Saturday. We're taking the kids to the zoo. They've been really looking forward to it."

"That's okay Maddie" Pinkie interjected. "Me and Albie can go together. And I can learn more about magic like a proper witch!"

"Don't you want to go to the zoo?"

"Of course I do silly, but this is important. Tell 'm Albie!"

"I suppose it is important for Pinkie to get her supplies. But I do not see why Pinkie and I can not go to Diagon Alley and you to take the other kids to the zoo. I will make sure I am here bright and early. So we shall not be in the way."

"There you see? Perfectly fine and scheduled."

Albus moved himself towards the exit.

"Well, I will be seeing you then. Miss Maddie it has been a pleasure."

Albus moved to leave the premises but Pinkie stopped him and gave him a hug. He awkwardly patted her on her back with a smile.

"Take care Albie"

"You too, Pinkie."

Albus relinquished the hug with a smile and apparated away.

When he later arrived in Hogwarts and sat behind his desk to do some paperwork he found another cupcake in his pocket. It was delicious.

xxx

"I swear to god Jillian! If you don't knock it off, I'll kick you in the clunge so hard your clit will shoot out of your nostril!"

"What's a clunge?"

Pinkie did an actual spit-take and started laughing

Maddie had enough of these shenanigans and put a stop to them decidedly. "Jillian stop rocking the chair. Sophie stop corrupting the children, or I'll send the both of you to your room. Pinkie could you grab something to clean that up please?" Pinkie went and did just that.

"Gracious me. I thought we were passed this." she sat down at the head of the table when five year old Alfie jumped on her lap. "What's a clunge Maddie?"

Maddie gave Sophie a look and an exasperated sigh.

Sophie looked properly chastised. She did have a bit of a foul language problem. They were working on it.

"It's a rude word Alfie." Maddie said. "Anyway, would you be a dear and get everyone for supper?"

"Yes Maddie!" Alfie ran up the stairs and not long after a bunch of children ages varying from 5 to 18 ran down the stairs to get some dinner. Everybody sat down on their own designated spaces. And there was the general hullabaloo of a bunch of children at the dinner table.

"Everybody can I have your attention please? I have an announcement to make."

The table quieted as everyone listened to Maddie.

"I'm sure you've all talked among yourselves about the elderly gentleman that was here this afternoon."

"He had funny clothes."

"Yes Alfie he did, that's because he was a wizard. And he came to tell us that our very own Pinkie is also a wizard. Well a witch technically. I believe it too. I saw him turn a teacup into a newt."

"You've met Rodger?" Grace asked innocently.

"Rodger?"

She pulled a yellow newt that was struggling in her hand from her sweater pocket and showed it to everyone at the table.

"Grace that's disgusting!" Sophie said. "Put that thing away! We're eating"

Grace put Rodger back in her sweater where he started to fall asleep again.

"Are you serious? You're joking surely." Mark asked, one of the older children at the orphanage.

"No, I'm keeping Rodger!" Grace replied angrily.

"I'm not talking about Rodger, I'm talking about magic."

"You've met Pinkie right?" Lewis said sarcastically. "You can't be that surprised."

Maddie showed Mark the flyers with the moving pictures on them. "Apparently the wizarding world likes to keep itself secret. Share those with everyone would you." Maddie sat back down at the foot of the table. "So I'm allowed to tell you all this because we are Pinkies family but it is very important that everyone keeps this a secret. So Alfie you're not allowed to tell anyone Pinkie's a witch okay?"

"Okay Maddie."

What followed were the obvious questions among the children such as 'am I a wizard?' and 'how do you become a witch?' and so on. Not to mention some Pinkie poking to see if she would do things.

"That's not all everyone." The children quieted down again. "Pinkie's also going to have to go to another school. She's going to Hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry in Scotland. It is a boarding school which means that she won't be here for long periods of time."

Alfie immediately started crying. "Pinkie's leaving us!" He wailed.

"Oh silly." Pinkie said. "I'm not leaving you. I could never do that. I'll be over as often as I can."

"But who will make desert? And cupcakes and cakes?"

"Well I might be able send some of that stuff over. And who knows what sort of cool magical foods I'll find? I promise I'll send loads of weird stuff. And you can write me. I'm sure you can ask some of the others to help you."

Being adequately mollified by Pinkie, Maddie continued her explanation. "Albus will be here next Saturday to pick Pinkie up to take her shopping for her magical supplies. Because of this she won't be able to make it to our trip to the zoo."

Maddie clapped her hands together.

"That's it for my announcements. Let's eat!"

And the hullabaloo continued.

Author's Note

Chapter 5: Banking with Albie

Pinkie was bouncing on the couch in anticipation. The other children were watching Saturday morning cartoons but Pinkie couldn't really concentrate on them. She wanted to do something, so she went into the kitchen to set up breakfast.

It was around that time people were coming down the stairs to do their morning business.

"Morning, Pinkie."

"Morning, Duncan. How was footy yesterday?"

"We won 1-0."

"Oh my gosh! You know what this calls for?"

"You can't throw a party Pinkie. You've got things to do."

"Oh right. Still..."

Pinkie grabbed one of her secret cupcakes from behind the radio and put it on Duncan's plate.

"Mini-party."

"Thanks Pinkie."

"So are you excited about your trip? Or a little bummed out because you can't go to the zoo with us."

"Yes! But it is what it is. I'm gonna see if I can find some cool stuff to bring home. Maddie has given me a small allowance to spend on magical things. It's going to be so much fun!"

A lot more people started flowing into the eating room now and breakfast was just about to start.

"Breakfast!" Duncan shouted through the house. Those who weren't awake yet were so now.

There was a general buzz in the air as people started eating. The excitement for the zoo was mounting when the doorbell rang.

"I'll get it!" Pinkie zoofed towards the door. It was Albus.

"Hi Albie! Come in we're eating breakfast. Want some?"

"No thank you, I already ate… You would not happen to have one of those cupcakes would you?"

"Oh Albie, even I know you can't eat cupcakes all the time." Nevertheless she pulled one from somewhere anyway.

"Here you go. It'll be our secret."

Albus took it happily, eyes a-twinkling, and put it in his pocket.

"I wanted to give this one to Minerva. She will be one of your teachers. I am sure you will like her and if I give her this, I am sure she will like you as well."

Albus greeted everyone gently when they entered the room. While Pinkie went to get her stuff. When she returned she had as small backpack with her.

"Let's go. Time's a waistin'.'" She said excitedly.

"Indeed it is." Albus turned towards the rest of Happy Oaks residents.

"Everyone I will make sure she will be back around six. Have fun at the zoo."

Albus extended his arm towards Pinkie and she took it with both arms. And with a loud crack they apparated from the premises.

"Cool!" Observed Nico still a little sleepy.

Everyone agreed and continued eating.

Xxx

Pinkie and Albus reappeared in front of a dingy looking pub in London. Pinkie promptly vomited all over the street. Albus quickly cleared it up with a quick spell and went to her aid.

"I am so sorry I know some people can get a bit nauseous from apparation but I've never seen such a reaction."

"…I was everything…" She burped.

"Oh dear." Albus quickly cast a quick diagnostic spell. The results came back normal. Just a particular violent reaction to apparation.

"Perhaps for the way back I can create a portkey for you. I think that would be better."

"Yeah." She said as she was standing up. "That's probably a good idea."

Never one to feel sorry for herself. "Well I guess this is a good excuse to try some delicious magical foodstuffs."

Albus had to laugh at that one.

"Ah, then let us go to Gringotts first. We will need money if we are to purchase some food after all."

They entered the dingy pub that was called the Leaky Cauldron. The clientele greeted them warmly when they were directed to the back by a friendly looking bartender named Tom.

Albus tapped the wall in a peculiar pattern with his wand. It caused the bricks in the wall to slide to the side granting them access to Diagon Alley.

"Welcome back Pinkamena, to the magical world."

A cozy shopping street greeted them full of tiny magical shops. There were other children about with their parents buying their school supplies. One shop casually exploded none the worse for wear. The shopkeeper with a face covered in soot did shout not to mix the porcupine quills willy nilly to one of the children.

"This is my kinda place!"

Albus smiled at her knowingly. "Come on, Gringotts is this way."

xxx

They were greeted by Goblins wearing armour and long spears. Albus spoke to them in an abrupt sounding language he explained was called Gobbledygook. When they entered the building proper, the Goblin at the counter spoke in perfect English.

"Good afternoon Headmaster, what brings you to the Goblin nation this fine day?"

"We have come to retrieve 'you-know-what' from vault 'you-know-which' and to review the Pie family holdings. Should they prove to be insufficient we would like to set up an account for schooling.'

"I'm afraid that particular item has already been retrieved by your giant keeper of keys. As for the Pie account. There is a vault. It can only be entered by one of the family, I take you assume this girl to be an heir?"

"Ah, it seems Hagrid has pre-empted me. Indeed I do. Pinkie?"

"Pinkie stop poking the guards please, we are here on official business."

Pinkie skipped back towards the counter.

"I've made a new friend!" She turned towards the teller. "Hi, I'm Pinkie Pie. Would you like a Muffin?"

"I… Yes I would like a muffin."

"Here you go sweety."

"...I'm not a sweety…" The teller grumbled as he ate the muffin with gusto.

The Goblin cleared his throat.

"Anyway let me direct you towards mister Gorefist here. He shall take you to the carts that you will ride to your vault."

"Follow me please." He said while power-walking to stay in front of the long legged ones.

"Cool! I have a vault?"

"Your family apparently held one. We are going to investigate whether or not it will suffice for your schooling."

"But, can't the orphanage pay for it?"

"Not completely. Do not worry yourself Pinkie, education is a right as well as a privilege. We will get your sorted."

"Thanks Albie. So are these the infamous carts?"

They stopped in front of a rickety looking minecart. Gorefist sat in front and there was a big seat in the back suited for the human passengers.

Pinkie and Albus took their seats and when Gorefist threw the switch the cart sped off into depths unknown at ludicrous speeds.

"Whee! This is fun Whoo-hoo!"

Suddenly the cart splashed through a waterfall also known as the thief's downfall. Positioned so that those covered in magical disguises would be revealed.

"Yay! Hey I'm not wet! Magic rules!"

Albus smiled at the exuberance of youth.

The cart made a few more death defying drops and loop-the-loops before coming to a halt. On their right was a giant door with many cogs embedded in it's masonry.

"Pie family vault, you can exit the vehicle on your right hand side." Gorefist said as he pointed towards some handily placed stairs next to the cart.

"Please mind your step."

"That was fun wasn't it." Pinkie gushed as they moved from the cart.

Pinkie was surprised with Albuss' flexibility as he moved quite gracefully from the cart.

"Indeed it was. I should go to Gringotts more often. Especially the journey to the older vaults is most thrilling."

When standing up close the Pie family vault was an impressive thing. It stood at least seven Pinkies tall and four Pinkies wide.

Gorefist ran his nail across the side and some of the cogs started turning and a small hole opened up on the side.

"I believe that is where you show proof of who you are."

"How do I do that?"

"I am not certain. Most older families used some of their blood. However the Pie family was always a little unorthodox. Please allow me."

Albus started to run his hands over the stone with his eyes closed. Trying to sense the magic that run through it. He muttered detection spells under his breath. The magic felt very similar to that of Pinkie but much more subdued. There was nothing there to give a hint of how to open the vault...

He was about to ask Pinkie for a drop of her blood when Pinkie pulled a cupcake from somewhere and put it through the hole.

"No Pinkie!"

The cogs started rumbling and rotating. Loud mechanical noises filled the cave and dust started to fall from the ceiling that was too far to see. Cupcakes were the key it seemed.

"He looked hungry to me."

When Albus took a closer look at the hole he could see where Pinkie was coming from. It looked like the mouth of a stylized horse, the sigil of house Pie looked very old and faded.

Gorefist was surprised. He never thought that the vault would be opened. He feared that he would be on cleaning duty after yet another vault security induced bloodbath. He did his duty and turned back towards the cart and let the long legged ones do their business.

When the doors slowly started to open Pinkie was suddenly overcome with nerves. She never thought they would make it this far to be honest. This was going to be the first time after...well, after seven years that she'd see something of her old family again. It didn't feel like a fun adventure at all. It was more like visiting the family tomb.

Albus and Pinkie stepped inside a giant poorly lit hall filled with absolutely nothing.

"You know after all this trouble this feels a little anticlimactic." Pinkie quipped despite not really knowing what she was feeling.

Albus pulled his wand from his sleeve and silently threw some balls of light to the four corners of the room. It was indeed very empty. There was nothing in the air that would indicate a spell or an illusion.

Pinkie noticed something shimmering though in the centre of the room when Albuss' spell passed it.

"There is something in the middle."

Albus saw it as well. It looked like a small object floating in mid-air. Carefully they moved towards it.

When they were close Pinkie reached out to touch it but Albus was quicker this time and held her back.

"Let us try to be cautious Pinkie. These old places can be incredibly dangerous and it would be a shame if after doing all that, that we should end up as an ugly stain in your vault."

He cast some detection spells but once again there was nothing. The Pie family was surprisingly trusting.

The object was rather small and did not actually float in mid-air but was instead attached to the roof with a very fine piece of string.

"Okay go ahead. It's fine as far as I can tell."

She grabbed it with both hands and unwrapped it. The wrapping turned out to be a piece of old tightly wound yellowed printer paper, inside it was a small metal object with a handle in the shape of a prancing horse.

"It's a key." She told Albus. "I wonder what it's for."

"May I have a look?"

"Sure."

She handed it over.

"It's made of a very strange metal I have never seen before. It's very beautiful."

"It's bismuth. My family used to mine it a long time ago, I think."

"Ah, I did use it once during my alchemical experiments. Fascinating stuff. It makes the most beautiful crystals."

Albus was about to hand the key back to Pinkie when he noticed something.

"There is writing on that paper."

Pinkie turned the paper around and read.

xxx

The body is but a vessel. A puppet to bend to the souls tyranny.

And lo, the body is not eternal. For it must feed on the flesh of others, lest it return from the dust whence it came.

Therefore must the soul deceive, despise and murder men.

- Stervor Avaritia

xxx

"Wow that's creepy" Pinkie handed the letter over to Albus. "I wonder what it means."

He read the letter and answered.

"It's a translated quote from the 'liber de magnis bellum.'"

"Gesundheit."

He had to laugh a little "It's one of the oldest books in Britain. It tells the tale of an ancient wizarding war between good and evil. Some believed that the original story is even older. That the book was itself transcribed from another more ancient civilisation."

"And this Stervor Avaritia? Who was he?"

"He was the...man that instigated the war."

"Why did you hesitate there?"

"Some believed he was a god. The book itself is very nebulous about it."

Pinkie looked at the key and the letter, just thinking. She unhooked the key from the string and folded the paper around it and put it in her backpack. When she looked up she had to know.

"...Do-...Do you think my family was evil?"

Albus knelt so that he could look her directly in the eye.

"There are few things in this world that I am completely sure of Pinkie. But I do know this. Your family was not evil."

She tried to look away but Albus held her arm.

"No, look at me Pinkie. I happen to know a great deal about what can be considered good and what can be considered bad. I don't like to think about it but I've fought in two wars and I've seen some things. Things that I would consider true evil. Your family was as far removed from those things as I believe any human being can be."

There was a moment of silence then Albus let go of her arm and stood up.

Pinkie nodded to him. She heard what he tried to say.

xxx

The ride back up was decidedly less cheerful. The whole financial thing seemed far less important then the discoveries they made.

"Riddles and even more riddles." Albus was musing. "Pinkie, do you know what happened in your home seven years ago?"

"Yes."

"Do you think you could tell me?"

"...I don't wanna talk about it."

"Pinkie, this is important. There are a lot of people who have a lot of questions. People who cared deeply for you and your family and -"

"WE HATH SAID WE SHALL 'T NOT SPEAK OF IT!"

The already dark cave the cart was racing through turned even darker. The sound of Pinkies voice started echoing deep within. The cart itself seemed to shake upon it's wheels. When he looked at Pinkie he could have sworn he saw her eyes had turned to a deep midnight blue.

Only for a moment and then it was gone.

Gorefist tried to school his startled countenance.

"Please keep the noise levels down inside the cart."

"Sorry."

Was that accidental magic? Or something else entirely? Whatever it was her voice held not only volume but command as well. Albus decided to waylay the subject for now. For self-preservation if nothing else... He had a lot to think about.

Author's Note

A/N The little letter is actually a direct quote from Vagrant story. It just fit so beautifully with the story I'm trying to tell that I couldn't resist.

Chapter 6: Shopping with Albie

"May the rivers of Britain run red with the blood of your enemies." The teller spoke In Gobbledygook as Pinkie and Albus moved to leave the building, their financial business concluded.

Pinkie knew what this was! An opportunity to show that she was hip with the Goblins so to speak. That she knew the lingo and that she knew how to behave in proper Goblin culture.

"And may the women of your enemies lay bleeding from your corrupted Goblin cock." Pinkie replied solemnly in equally fluent Gobbledygook.

Albus was horrified. The Goblins were horrified. The other customers were confused on why everyone was horrified.

"What? I thought we were trying to gross each other out with our cruelty?"

The teller ran away crying "It's not corrupt, it's not!"

"I am afraid that Goblins are particularly sensitive concerning their manhood Pinkie. Where did you learn this particular phrase?"

She pointed towards the guard she was poking earlier. "He taught me some Goblin phrasing. But I may have mispronounced it some."

"What were you trying to say?"

"I hope your enemy's girlfriend likes you more."

"Well… You were close."

"What did I say?"

"Best not repeat it Pinkie. I think we've outstayed our welcome for today."

Albus manoeuvred Pinkie quickly towards the exit.

"Come on there is shopping to do."

xxx

First on the agenda were potion supplies. It's handy to have a cauldron to put your stuff in. Pinkie got all her first year potion materials making sure to be extra careful with the porcupine quills. The cauldron itself wasn't the best. It was a bit spotty. But who could beat those prices?

Books were next. She made some light conversation with a bushy haired girl in the bookstore who was really excited about books. She reminded her of someone but for the life of her she couldn't remember who. Together they found a lot of neat second hand books tucked away in dark dingy corner. This brought the excitement to whole new levels since now more books could be acquired. Pinkie wasn't certain but she thought she might've made a new friend in that little store.

Next came the trunk. It was your basic run'o the mill storage box made of some undefinable material. The owner seemed glad to be rid of it. Pinkie didn't mind. At home she had loads of stickers and glitter to decorate the trunk with. It could be a fun little project right before school.

Pinkie was starting to struggle lugging all these supplies around. Luckily Albus' shrinking charm is second to none. Pinkie stuffed everything in her trunk which Albus shrunk.

"I'm thrilled to have my junk in the shrunk trunk." She informed Albus.

"Indeed," Albus replied. "When you get home, make sure you spelunk in your shrunk trunk for your junk, lest it create a funk."

"Oh please, of course I will spelunk in my shrunk trunk to release the funk I'm not drunk."

"Perhaps you could place your thoroughly spelunked shrunk trunk underneath your bunk, it could clear up some gunk."

"I am not such a skunk to leave my spelunked shrunk trunk covered in gunk underneath my bunk."

"Verily, but even if you debunk the being of a skunk could leave their spelunked shrunk trunk covered in gunk underneath their bunk, I would not have thunk you to slam dunk an old drunk you little punk."

"..."

Pinkie and Albus started laughing together.

"Wow, I think you won that one." Pinkie said.

"Oh hardly, I believe many of those were not real words."

After that little moment it was time to continue their quest for more school supplies. Or so it should have gone. Instead Pinkie was once again distracted by something in the magical world. A small little pet store was seemingly hiding in between two pillars. Pan's Pets it was called.

"Oh look there's a pet store over there! Do you think we can have a little lookyloo?"

"Of course. Lead the way."

The little store sold all sorts of cute critters. Pinkie saw small adorable rodents to gawk at and fish that made blub noises.

Albus looked on and was wrestling with the idea of giving Pinkie an owl. While technically against the rules for a headmaster to do so. It could really help with communication with the orphanage.

Ah, that was the solution. Technically it would be the property of the orphanage not Pinkie Pie. A welcome gift from one institution to another to the magical world. Yes that will do nicely.

"Pinkie I am going to step out for a little bit, I will return shortly. Will you be alright here?"

"Sure Albie. Miss Jackalope here was just telling me a fascinating tale about a mongoose and a hippogriff that he knew. Quite the scandal."

"No doubt." Albus said and left the shop to get an owl at Eeylops Owl Emporium. The current store's main competitor who held the monopoly on selling owls.

A cacophony of hooting, barking and other owl noises welcomed Albus when he stepped over the threshold. With an expert eye he examined every owl trying to find one that will suit Pinkie the best.

His eyes settled on a young whiskered screech owl. It had the most adorable ears. Yes this one will do nicely.

He purchased the owl along with some food and a cage and other paraphernalia and hurried back to Pan's Pets.

Pinkie gave Albus a wave when he returned to the shop.

"Who's your friend?" She asked.

"This is a whiskered screech owl and currently she is without a name. I was hoping that you would give her one since she will be your new companion when you go to Hogwarts."

"You gave me a pet?" Pinkie felt overwhelmed. She ran up to Albus and gave him a fierce hug.

"Thank you! Thank you! Thank You!"

"You're welcome Pinkie. Though technically I would appreciate it if we pretended that I gave it to the orphanage instead. Technically I'm not allowed to give presents to students."

"..."

"..."

Pinkie named him Owlicious.

xxx

Gerric Ollivander was enjoying a perfectly ordinary start of his day in his workshop. It was the time of year where most young wizards and witches were ready to purchase their first wand, so he liked to start early in making some of them.

He was currently wearing his safety goggles and was working the delicate procedure of melding the dragon heartstring with the wood. Birch in this case. Now since birch wood is quite bendy some people like it to be stiffened up a bit. That was what he was going to do with this one. An even ten inches of stiff birch wood and dragon heartstring. Oh yes this one will be quite special. Sparks started flying as he brought his hammer down.

xxx

Gerric had a pleasant flow going when the bell rang alerting him of a fresh customer. Putting the finishing touches on the wand he was working on he quickly placed it in it's box while it was still smouldering and hurried his way to the store front.

xxx

Pinkie and Albus were waiting patiently behind the counter. Albus greeted the wand maker as he placed his newly made wand in a rack somewhere.

"Good morning Albus. Bringing another fresh batch of students for their first wand is it? It's been a while for you."

"Just this one I'm afraid. The others will be coming with Minerva."

"I see, well you-"

Gerric's eyes landed upon Pinkies. He blinked once, twice. three times.

"Something wrong Gerric?"

"Wrong?" He replied absent-mindedly. "No, no nothings wrong." He seemed to snap out of whatever fugue he was in. "Come on let's get you a wand young lady."

He grabbed the first wand within reach and gave it to Pinkie to sample.

"Right, so which arm is your wand arm?"

"Well... I flip pancakes with righty but I use old lefty for writing and school stuff."

"Hmm tricky tricky. Hold on a second."

He waved his wand around and some measuring tape started measuring Pinkie in random places including but not limited to a single string of hair and a nostril.

"Try this one. Maple and dragonheartstring, eight inches, quite supple."

Pinkie grabbed the wand with both hands and enthusiastically started waving it. The wand sounded like a wet fart with every wave. It started to smell like it as well.

"For heavens sake! Please stop waving it around!" Gerric said while taking it from Pinkie. "Right something a bit more..."

He handed her another one.

"Rosewood and phoenix feather. Great for transfiguration."

Pinkie used her left hand with this one and waved it about a bit more gently. Still this one started coughing a serious sounding dry cough.

"Right definitely not that one."

"I think it was ill."

"I'll have to check it for wandrot."

On and on it went until Pinkie tried half the wands in the shop. Gerric Ollivander was starting to get a little bit worried. Normally at this stage he would at least get an inkling at what sort of witch he was dealing with.

"Young lady I want you to enter these hallowed halls of my store and see if your magic can find your wand for you."

Albus raised an inquisitive eyebrow.

"Normally I would know already. Now I don't. We may have to consider that your wand is not in my store." He said turning to Pinkie.

"Go on Pinkie. Let your magic guide you."

Pinkie started roaming the store trying different wands but the result was always the same. A weird bodily function that felt like rejection. In the mean time she saw other children buying their wands quite easily while she was still fumbling around in these corridors. She was starting to get a little worried when she noticed a dusty cardboard box filled with wands.

"Mister Gerric? What are these wands right here?"

Gerric rode a ladder into the corridor that Pinkie was in and looked at what she was pointing at.

"Don't waste your time with those. They are failed experiments I did using muggle materials. Carbon fibre, aluminium, you name it. They're rubbish" He said and scooted away

Still Pinkie felt something reaching out to her from that box. "I am a good wand!" It seemed to say. "You'll see! I am, I am!"

So she decided to ignore Gerric's advice. After all wouldn't it be sad if these wands never found their owner? Rummaging around in the box she found a rather stubby looking wand in an unpolished brown colour.

When she grabbed hold of it the entire store exploded in a fountain of confetti and party whistle noises. Her hair turned extremely poofy for a second before settling back down in her regular curls.

"Wow, what a rush!"

Gerric zipped back into the corridor,

"I think I've found my wand!"

She handed the wand over to Gerric for inspection.

"Chipboard and unicorn tail hair. Six inches. Nothing special." He looked a little lost and confused.

"I don't even have a box for this."

"That's okay I can put it in my shrunk trunk."

"No, I'll find something for you to put it in. Curious... I could've sworn..." He mumbled as he moved to get Pinkie a suitable wand box.

Pinkie ran back to the front of the store to show Albus her new wand.

"Look!" She shouted while spraying confetti from her wand. "I've got a wand! It's made of chipboard and Unicorn tail hair."

"Chipboard? I've never heard of such a material. What is it?"

She stopped her confetti conjuring for a second to think.

"I dunno, compressed wood bits? I suppose it doesn't matter."

She pointed her wand and it made a party whistle noise.

"It's great fun though!"

Albus nodded to her in agreement.

"Well it seems we acquired everything needed for a first year term at Hogwarts and we still have some time left. Shall we get some ice-cream as we while away the time?"

Pinkie looked like Christmas came early.

"Do you even have to ask?"

xxx

The ice-cream parlour of Florian Fortescue was pleasantly busy with children and grown-ups alike either enjoying ice-cream or clamouring for it. Those in line at the counter were often found discussing what sort of flavour they wanted and Albus and Pinkie were no different.

"I think I want strawberry black peppercorn. Or, or maybe blue Java banana and chocolate. Geez this is one of the hardest decision of my life! How do these people do it?!"

"Peace Pinkie. Tell you what. I choose for you and you choose for me. That way not only will we have delicious ice-cream. It will also be a nice surprise."

It was obvious from her expression that Pinkie approved of this development immensely.

As they were eating their many flavoured ice-cream at a nice cosy table in the corner, the subject of magic came up as it was wont do between wizards and witches.

"So what does magic feel like for you Pinkie? For instance when I use my magic the image of a nice roaring flame, perfect for warming ones extremities after a long winter walk not irregularly enters my mind. I suppose it is one of the reasons why Fawkes my phoenix stays close to me."

Pinkie turned her spoon around in her mouth as her expression changed. She put the spoon back in her cup and looked outside the window.

"Sometimes it feels like I'm standing atop of an endless blue ocean with sunny skies end seagulls macking in the wind. It's nice and very peaceful."

Then she turned to Albus.

"But sometimes it feels like there are thousands of savage horses underneath my skin or galloping on a plain or something and it frightens me. I don't know them. It's something I can't place."

Albus looked at her directly over his half-moon spectacles for a moment looking contemplative.

"Pinkie, from your first statement it is safe for me to assume that you are probably going to be a very interesting witch."

He took a bite from his ice-cream and thought it through some more.

"As for your second statement. Do these horses appear in times of stress? Or perhaps when you are about to perform some accidental magic?"

"Yes!"

"Hmm, then perhaps it is your magic trying to defend you? I do not believe these horses as you say are necessarily something you need to be frightened about. Perhaps they are your magic's way of expressing intense emotion and the emotion is part of you.

He smiled at her

"And it's a little bit silly to be afraid of yourself don't you think?"

"I guess. But they do feel distinct. Sometimes I can see individual traits on them. For instance one of them is a really dark mare and she always has a really white mare right beside her. They are always galloping upfront."

"Have you ever tried communicating with these horses?"

"Yes, but I can't understand them. They're very busy and loud."

"All the more proof that they are part of yourself. I have also noticed a certain propensity for the loud in you." He said with a wink. Albus noticed that his joke fell a little flat because she was still worried.

"Give it time Pinkie and do not worry about it overmuch. Lest we forget that your magic is still developing and will probably find it's balance in it's own unique way has it does for us all."

Relief flooded Pinkie as she secretly feared that her magic was bad or something.

"You know it's really nice to talk to someone about this. When I tried to talk to people in the orphanage about it. They just don't really understand I guess. Even though they try."

"I imagine it's hard to try to understand something when you have never experienced it yourself."

Albus ate the last of his ice-cream with gusto.

"When term starts and you still have questions about your magic you could always go to the nurses office. Madam Pomfrey can run some tests for you and see what's what."

"I'll keep it in mind. Thanks for the ice-cream Albie!"

They stood from their cosy table and made room for some other sugar craving patrons.

"Now come. Let us bring you back to your home."

"Great I can't wait to show of all my new stuff and Owlicious!"

xxx

"Tell me Gorefist. What were your experiences with the heir of the Pie family?"

"She quite easily overruled our great foe Albus Dumbledore during our trek through the mines. I'm sure we all felt the magic surging through our lands. She is not to be trifled with"

The female head of the medical wing at Gringotts turned towards her king.

"That's not even half of it. Have you heard what she'd done to poor Bonecruncher? She build him up with confectionery of such divine taste that for a moment he was truly at peace with himself and the universe only to utterly destroy him when she left Gringotts. It was the ultimate power play. I fear he will be under the care of my mind healers for some time."

The head of the intelligence department nodded along.

"Indeed, our assassins also found cupcakes in their pockets. They wisely backed away from any attempts after finding them. Those stupid enough to have eaten one also swear to its divine delicacy. We fear their loyalties can no longer be trusted."

"So cunning, incredibly powerful and no scruples whatsoever. The client didn't lie that's for certain."

King Ragnuk slammed his throne with his fist.

"Damn it! This bint is playing four dimensional chess while we're here eating glue and crayons!"

"So what's our next move?" A brave goblin asked.

"Nothing, we delay. We tell our client that the attempt was made then we wait and see how this plays out. I want spies in the vicinity of the target at all times and activate our agent at Hogwarts at once. Keep me notified of any changes. Go."

The goblins of the council exited the war room and left Ragnuk with his thoughts.

"Let's see what you do next heiress Pie. The ball is in your court."

Chapter 7: Party on the Hogwarts Express

Pinkie Pie woke up at the crack of dawn and raced down the stairs. It was the first day! The first day of Hogwarts had arrived! She couldn't contain all this excitement! So many new friends! She almost started to hyperventilate. Almost but not quite for there was much baking to be done. Cupcakes and muffins and cakes, oh my!

xxx

Daphne Greengrass awoke by the gentle nudging of their family house elf Jibbles.

"It's time for wakey young mistress."

Daphne rose from her slumber rubbing her eyes. Long blond hair cascading down her neck and back sticking out at odd angles here and there. A loud ungraceful yawn forced some wakefulness back into her when she stepped out of her bed.

She was escorted to the bathroom by an excited Jibbles babbling on about her first day of Hogwarts. Daphne herself couldn't really summon much enthusiasm since she wasn't even fully in her body yet.

After a quick shower she put on the robes that Jibbles had laid out for her and headed downstairs. Her mother had already started breakfast. Her dad was sitting at the head of the table sipping his morning tea and reading the daily prophet.

"Good morning mother, father." She said as she joined them at the table.

"Good morning Daphne. Are you ready?"

"Yes mother. I packed everything I need last night."

"Good. Remember that-"

She was interrupted by the sound of Astoria coming down the stairs in a rush. She ran into the room babbling about something or other.

Daphne's mother was not in the mood for her sister's joyful antics and put a stop to them decisively.

"Astoria Greengrass! We do not run in this house! You will conduct yourself with the decorum and grace that is befitting of the noble house of Greengrass."

Poor Astoria lost whatever excitement she had and look forlornly towards her father for support.

"Don't look at me." He said as he continued reading. "Your mother is right. We fear that you have been neglecting your studies as of late. Your etiquette in particular."

Her mother once again entered the fray. "Now go clean yourself up. You will not sit at the dining table in your sleepwear."

Daphne's sister morosely moved herself from the room.

"And don't slouch. Think of your posture, or we're going to get the books out again."

Daphne didn't understand why Astoria couldn't just do what her parents asked of her. All they wanted was a little dedication. Oh well, that's why she was the heir and her sister was the spare.

Daphne sat down with her parents and spoke about the other heirs on the Hogwarts Express. She was going to show them what a Greengrass could do with magic.

xxx

Hermione Granger fell asleep last night reading. All evidence pointed towards this inevitable fact. She woke up face down on top of Hogwarts a History.

When she commenced operation photon intake she noticed that said book was sporting an impressive drool stain in between pages 136 and 137 and not only that, her neck had a disconcerting creak.

Books made for lousy pillows she knew from experience.

She stretched and yawned loudly so that higher brain function could be within grasp.

Once higher brain function was achieved it was time to panic over the giant gross drool stain in her favourite book.

"Eww ew eww!" Hermione started searching for something to clean the book with but in her panic some accidental magic cleared the stain right up.

"Oh thank you witch powers!"

She quickly returned the book to her trunk which she had packed the previous evening. It was time for a quick shower and then breakfast.

xxx

Harry Potter woke up in his own bed. He's been sleeping in it for a month now, which was weird for him. Normally he was kept in a cupboard but ever since his giant friend Hagrid appeared in his life he's got his own room and his own stuff. Most of it magical.

That's not to say that everything was fine now. Instead of the open hostility he was used to from the Dursleys, the family he was living with, and was his family from his mothers side, changed into something altogether strange. He was ignored.

Which compared to being called a freak every other day was something of a step up as far as he was concerned.

None of that mattered now. Because he was going to Hogwarts today! He was going to learn magic. The reason why the Dursleys called him a freak in the first place. Harry smiled.

But first he had to make breakfast before the Dursleys came down the stairs. It wouldn't do to give them an excuse to not drive him to Kings Cross station.

He dressed in some of Dudley's old clothes and got to work.

xxx

Pinkie and her entourage entered kings cross station at 10:30. The rambunctious group was making it's way towards the barrier that separated the magical world from the mundane one. Alfie was sitting on top of the trunk which was in turn being pushed by an excited Pinkie Pie. They babbled about small things and big things.

"Well, here we are everybody." Maddie said looking at the map that came with one of the flyers that Albus left them.

They stopped in front of the secret entrance to platform 9¾

A silence fell over the group as the children realised it was time to say goodbye to Pinkie, at least for a couple of months.

"Bye Pinkie. Stay safe you hear!" Lewis said giver his not-quite-sister a side hug.

"Yeah, go kick their asses!" Sophie added

Pinkie looked a little confused and asked "Who's asses?"

"All the asses!" Sophie responded raising her arm in exuberance.

"Yeah!" All of them shouted drawing some stares from the gathering crowd.

But then it was time to really say their farewells. She hugged them all individually trying to draw it out as long as possible. Alfie was trying not to cry and failing.

"Now now Alfie. I'll be back home come Christmas. So don't be sad because I'll write loads you'll see! Owlicious can't wait."

"Hoot."

Alfie hugged her a long time.

"Go on Pinkie it's time to go."

And with her pet owl, trunk and secret confectioneries she ran through the barrier.

xxx

Daphne Greengrass floo'd onto the platform with her parents in tow. Fashionably late of course, the train wouldn't dare to leave without her onboard. She noticed a redheaded family struggling to make it through the barrier to the muggle world. Truly a tragic sight those Weasleys.

Her parents noticed something else however.

"Oh Merlin, here she comes." Her dad said. He was speaking about Longbottom. An elderly lady with a ridiculous vulture hat that was hounding them about some botany business or other. Daphne didn't know nor care.

"Ghastly woman." Daphne's mother opined "Can't she leave as alone for one second? We're trying to take our daughter to Hogwarts."

Daphne's father sighed "You might as well take your belongings onto the train Daphne. This will probably take a while."

"Yes father."

Unconsciously in her heart of hearts she hoped for a more emotional goodbye. Maybe even a hug or a pat on the head. There was slim chance of that happening anyway but it wasn't improved by the presence of that Longbottom creature.

She steeled herself and made her way onto the train feeling inexplicably angry.

xxx

Suddenly Harry was shoved into the car. It seemed that the Dursleys couldn't be rid of him fast enough. Good thing he had his belongings stashed earlier that day. Thankfully the Dursleys were decent enough to throw it along with him.

The ride towards Kings Cross was a silent one. It seemed to Harry that uncle Vernon was conflicted about the whole thing. On the one hand Harry would be gone for the foreseeable future, but on the other he would be learning magic.

At the station Harry was none to gently removed from the vehicle along with his belongings. One and a half hours too early. With a brisk "Bye. Don't come back for Christmas." Uncle Vernon drove of.

Great, now what was he going to do with his time? He only had his wizarding money on him and a big trunk and owl cage to lug around. Harry sighed. He knew which way to go because of the flyers Hagrid had sent him after his trip to Diagon Alley. He supposed he could do a bit of people watching. Just sitting on his trunk and watch the crowds go by. It seemed dreadfully dull though. Seeing nothing for it he started moving.

As he roamed in between platforms nine and ten he realised that he had a lot of books with him he could read. He had already perused them before of course but now with so much time on his hands he could easily get a little head start.

He sat his trunk down in a comfy looking out of the way corner, grabbed one of the books at random from his trunk and started reading.

It turned out it was the book on charms. He learned that charms are simple spells that did simple things. Like making things levitate or making things hot or cold. He wasn't allowed to use his wand out of school since he was underage and because of the statute of secrecy. Still he was eager to have a go at it.

"Maybe I can try it without a wand?" He thought.

He paged his way in the book until he found the section about the levitation charm. The incantation was something like wingardium leviosa. But he couldn't start shouting random words in the middle of a train station, swishing and flicking his hands around. He'd look like a lunatic.

Instead he stared at a nearby coke can for a long time, willing it to move.

The can did not move but he did feel something. He supposed it could be magic. It could also be indigestion. Who knows at this point.

Time passed quickly, it felt like, and before he knew it the barrier to platform 9¾ was opened up.

Oh well. He went through the barrier with a brisk pace, boarded the train that was already there, found a seat and continued his reading. Studying magic it turned out, seemed like it could be very interesting.

xxx

Hermione's parents were dentists.

Most people when they think of dentists think of calm intelligent people. Rational to a fault, upstanding citizens contributing to society. Dependable pillars of the community. That's what dentists are. That's what Hermione wanted to be.

Her parents were hippies imported from America.

Outstanding dentists to be sure. But also hippies. Hermione felt a little bit of shame that she was embarrassed by them.

"Far out Hermione look at these flowers! They're so colorful!"

That was her mother. She liked flowers. The dental practise was full of them. They brought the good mojo.

"Please mum can we hurry up? I don't want the train to leave without me and I have a big trunk to lug around."

"Mellow out my beautiful daughter. Your vibes are way harsh right now."

Hermione's father wrapped an arm around his wife.

"Now Charity, you were young once too. Hermione is very in flux right now. We should show her support on this new adventure."

Charity returned her husbands affections and looked towards Hermione and started moving her hands in a strange wiggly pattern around Hermione's head."

"Stop cleansing my aura mum! That stuff is scientifically proven hogwash and you know it!"

Charity gave her daughter a knowing smug expression.

"By that rationale witchcraft is also hogwash."

Hermione groaned in frustration and angrily stomped across king's cross station dragging her belongings along with her. Her parents were hurrying along after her.

Hurrying being a process they normally actively avoided they nevertheless could keep up.

When they reached the barrier they said there farewells. Hermione knew she was going to miss her oddball parents a lot. Despite their quirks they did support her and dragged her through what in her own mind was referred to as 'The Bad Times.' The time in school when she was bullied a lot because of her teeth, hair and nerdy disposition.

She looked back at them once more and went through the barrier.

xxx

Harry was reading his charms book for a while now when people finally started trickling onto the train. He was getting both excited and nervous about meeting new people. The Dursleys weren't exactly conducive to making friends back in Little Whinging and this was his first opportunity since starting school to really try.

After a while of thinking about things and reading his charms book of and on. It was really getting crowded on the train but his booth remained occupied only by Hedwig and himself. Maybe he should go outside and meet some people he thought. But that was the moment that the door to his booth opened and in walked a redheaded boy. Who asked if he could sit here because everywhere else was full.

xxx

Pinkie Pie was struggling to get her trunk onboard the train when there was a bit of a commotion happening at the barrier. A bunch of redheads came tumbling out of it appearing to be in a rush.

A blond girl passed her by that didn't seem in a helping mood. The redheads though hurried right up towards the train where a couple of twins helped Pinkie out.

"Well looky here brother of mine. It appears an ickle firsty has found herself in a spot of logistical tomfoolery."

"Indeed handsome one. A trunk far to big for a girl that small and an owl to boot. Mayhaps we should assist said waif along."

One of the twins levitated her trunk aboard while the other levitated Owlicious.

"Hi I'm Gred and this is Forge."

"Hi Grod. Hi Fredge! Thanks a lot for helping me with my trunk. Owlicious thanks you too."

"Hoot."

"No I'm Gredge and he's Frod… Wait"

He looked to his brother for assistance but when they turned to look towards Pinkie again to correct her. She was already helping their brother her own age board the train along with yet another redhead who was the oldest of the bunch who levitated al their trunks inside.

The redhead her own age mumbled a thanks before hurrying on the train proper. Fodge and Gread followed rambunctious like because they were beckoned by two older girls in Gryffindor robes.

Pinkie looked at her trunk, sighed and started dragging it along. It was really heavy. But at least it looked pretty. She'd put nice flower stickers on it.

She dragged her trunk with Owlicious on top through the corridors of the Hogwarts Express when she noticed a sneaky toad trying to hide in the corner.

"Hello little buddy." She said. "Where are you off to?"

"I'm searching for adventure miss." The toad said. "My name is Trevor."

"Well how did a dapper toad such as yourself find your way onboard this train?"

"I was brought here by a young boy. But I'm afraid I've lost him. Would you be a dear and give a weary amphibian a lift?"

"Why, I would be delighted."

Pinkie lifted Trevor up and placed her upon her head.

"Hoot." Owlicious said.

"Indeed." Replied Pinkie and Trevor.

"Stick with me Trevor. I'll find us some adventure."

xxx

"Could you help me find my toad? I think I lost him somewhere on the train."

Hermione looked at this boy and felt a moment of pride. Someone asked for her help. This was an opportunity to be a responsible person and maybe make a friend.

She immediately turned around and started walking away in search of the toad.

Neville was confused but then she turned around, grabbed the boy's hand and dragged him along.

"Hello, I'm Hermione. What's your name?"

"I'm Neville."

"Alright Neville let's go find your toad."

xxx

A redheaded boy asked politely if he could sit in Harry's booth. Harry had no reason to object and welcomed him in. He said his name was Ron Weasley. When Harry mentioned his own name Ron's eyes grew quite a bit inside his head. Harry knew why of course. The whole boy-who-lived thing.

He was asked to show his scar and he did. They started talking about magic and just when Ron was about to cast a spell on his rat the door to their booth slid open and there stood a bushy haired girl with long teeth being shadowed by someone who seemed a bit more shy.

"As anyone seen a toad? Neville here has lost one."

She then saw the wand in Ron's hand.

"Oh, are you doing magic?" She took a seat next to Harry. "Let's see then."

Neville who was a bit unsure of what to do took a seat next to her.

Ron did a little doggerel verse and waving his wand around to try to get his rat to turn yellow. Sadly it didn't work. Hermione pointed out that it didn't really sound like a real spell. She was about to show a real one on Harry's glasses when the door slid open with a loud thunk. In the doorway stood a mad looking girl with weirdly coloured hair and a toad on her head.

She looked around the booth with a concentrated look inspecting each of them in turn.

"Yes this'll do nicely."

xxx

Pinkie was roaming the halls of the train letting her Pinkie Sense guide her. Sometimes she would open a booth here or their startling the inhabitants. Sometimes she would sniff loudly, other times she would lick her index finger, hold it in front of her for ten seconds and watched it intently.

"What are you doing?" Trevor asked after one of these moments.

"Searching." Pinkie replied. "Most people think that parties just require a bit of organisation. Just bake a cake throw some confetti around and Bob's your uncle. No, I'm looking for a powder keg waiting for the right spark to ignite it..."

Pinkie slid a door open with a loud thunk and peered inside inspecting what she saw.

"Yes this'll do nicely."

xxx

Harry was startled out of the conversation by crazy girl with a toad on her head. She stepped inside resolutely like she owned the place.

"Trevor!"

The toad on her head jumped towards Neville who caught him with a surprising amount of affection.

"I'm glad you're back Trevor." Neville said.

Meanwhile the crazy girl was looking outside the window and lowering the blinds. Then quickly turned towards her trunk and started rummaging through it. She pulled out an old scuffy looking beatbox and put it on the small table near the window. Then she pulled out small cone shaped party hats with frills on the end and delicately placed them on each head in the room. Even Trevor got a small one.

Everyone looked at one another equally flabbergasted. There was a curiosity on where she was going with all this.

Then she turned towards the beat box, put a cassette in, and pushed play.

Peppy music started playing and the crazy girl with the weird hair started doing the goofiest dance he'd ever seen.

And just like that it hit him. Really hit him. He was going to learn magic. This was his life now. No more Dudley to prevent him from meeting people. No more Dursleys to order him around to do their bidding. No more fear.

He started laughing, a real big bouldering sort of laugh. The kind that would give an old man whiplash. And because he had absolutely no reason not to. He joined in and started dancing. He looked ridiculous and he didn't care.

Soon others joined in, even Trevor on Neville's head did something like a toady tango. Only Hermione remained seated. Uncertain on what to do, biting her lip and doubting on whether or not she should join in.

That didn't last though since the crazy girl pulled her to her feat by her hands and twirled her into Ron's arms who was doing a silly sort of shuffle thing. It didn't take long before they were dancing together.

After that she turned towards Harry.

"Hi I'm Pinkie Pie. What's your name?"

"Harry, Harry Potter."

xxx

Daphne walked with Pansy, a daughter of one of her fathers business relations, through the corridor. She supposed she would call her a friend. They knew one another since they were very young. Pansy was always a bit… vindictive in Daphne's view. Still it paid to have someone like that on your side.

They entered a booth that held Theodore Nott and Blaise Zabini as it's residents. They accepted their obligatory greetings with kissed hands and exaltations about their beauty, with grace.

They spoke about their summers each trying to impress the others with tales of both exorbitant luxury and hard teachings in equal measure.

Daphne enjoyed herself feeling in her element. Her tales of torturous music lessons with a horrid teacher were a hit.

Pansy's tale of woe of a house elf that failed to give the appropriate respect didn't shake up, which pleased Daphne immensely.

She was about to start another one of her anecdotes when a commotion happened some distance away. There was something that sounded like music maybe, and general sounds of merriment. Of course they had to investigate.

They found the corridor to be filled with people dancing to strange music that Daphne never heard before. Some of the people were wearing party hats or were munching on some delicious looking pies or candies. Some people were playing games. One was blindfolded trying to pin a fluffy thing on an image of a donkey looking creature.

Even the trolley lady looked happy. She was doing good business.

"Ugh, stupid mudbloods. Is nothing sacred anymore?" Pansy said with obvious disdain. Theo nodded along with her where Blaise looked a little bit more thoughtful.

Daphne, who was more surprised then anything, felt like she had no choice in the matter other then to agree. So she nodded her head putting on the mask of indifference with a hint of loathing.

She made eye contact with an obviously completely insane girl who appeared to be having some kind of fit.

"Yes let's go somewhere more quiet. I wish to-"

She was interrupted by a shove coming from the crowd. Draco Malfoy emerged like a baby rhinoceros from it's mothers womb out of the group of people.

"Filthy disgusting mudbloods!" He ranted. "Crabbe, Goyle stop looking ridiculous and get out here!"

It appeared to her that Vincent Crabbe and Gregory Goyle had decided on dancing but she couldn't be certain. When they arrived in a similar fashion that Draco did they mumbled some apologies.

Pansy helped Draco to his feet. "My sentiments exactly. These muggles are getting more brazen by the day."

"They do know how to bring a disturbance don't they." Daphne added.

"Come on let's find another place to sit."

Draco was hating that it was even necessary.

xxx

Pinkie was dancing with Hermione who was talking about the books she read since they met in the bookstore.

The party had expanded some since it started and was now filling in the corridor. More children had joined in from different booths. There was a girl named Susan Bones and her friend Hannah Abbot and an Asian girl with a fun sounding Irish accent called Cho Chang. There was Dean Thomas and Seamus Finnigan. Pinkie had to resist the urge to start singing Finnigan's wake.

Quickly rumour started spreading and soon older children decided to join in. Someone pulled some butterbeer from somewhere and just like that the party was leading a life of it's own.

Still Pinkie noticed a few subversive elements from the corner of her eye. A blonde girl with bright cold laser eyes, looked at her in an unfriendly way. Parties weren't for everyone. Pinkie knew this but she still didn't like the way she looked.

She wanted to help people come out of their shell. What she needed was a plan. So she found a nice corner for herself, snagged some butterbeers and started cooking something in her noggin'

xxx

"First years, over here! First years! This way please!" A very large bearded man was shouting for all the first years to follow him. Pinkie followed everyone out of the train staying close to Hermione who was talking about how first years got to Hogwarts on boats.

"How do you think he got so big?" Pinkie asked Hermione concerning the big man.

"I don't know. Maybe he's suffering from a form of gigantism, you know, like a medical condition?"

"You don't think he got stretched? That would've been awful. Oh, maybe he overfed on veggies. We should get some candy in him stat!"

"He doesn't look stretched. Just looks big."

"Hmm… If we encounter such mysteries on Hogwarts' doorstep just imagine what could lay within."

"Are you quoting something? It sounds like you're quoting something."

"...Maybe."

They shared their boat with two other girls and when everyone was on board the boat started moving on it's own accord.

The sight of Hogwarts at night was truly something special and everyone was staring mouth agape. Countless of little lights were spread out all over the castle making the whole scene feel quite rightly magical.

As the lights hit the water and reflected this way and that one of the girls on the boat was looking a bit to close to the water and fell in.

Pinkie and Hermione were scrambling to try and help when a giant tentacle came out of the lake with girl in sucker depositing her back in the boat none the worse for wear.

"Thank you mister Squid!" Pinkie shouted over the lake.

Her reward was a big splash in the face.

"Ah, I think it was miss Squid actually."

The tentacle came out of the water again and petted Pinkie and the girl who fell in the water, on their heads before submerging once again underneath the waves.

When Pinkie made eye contact with the girl they both burst out into laughter. Turns out her name was Lisa Turpin and together with Hermione and Morag McDougal the remainder of the boat ride turned out to be a pleasant one, if a bit cold.

xxx

Once inside the castle and after walking a bunch of stairs. They entered a hall decorated with moving paintings and armour. In it's centre stood a tall stern looking witch with a pointy hat, glasses and a list who introduced herself as Professor McGonagall.

She spoke about how they were about to be sorted by a hat into four separate houses each one holding a value above all others.

Pinkie was a little tired and bored after climbing all those stairs so she didn't pay a lot of attention. Though she did appreciate the drying spell the professor cast upon herself and Lisa and thanked her for it.

When the big doors opened and they stepped into the great hall Pinkie couldn't help herself but gawk all around. There were floating candles lighting up the room and the ceiling was enchanted to look like the night sky. It was truly beautiful.

She didn't notice that all the attention of the older students was firmly set upon the first years.

The initial commotion died down and Professor McGonagall placed an old hat on top of a stool who started singing a song about each of the four houses.

Pinkie liked it a lot and clapped along merrily feeling a pleasant buzz coming over her. Not really noticing that she was the only one who did.

She remembered the girl in the train that was so cranky when she looked at the hat and something of an idea popped in her mind.

When the song was done she waved at a few people who seemed friendly. Then McGonagall started calling out names and the sorting began.

xxx

The sorting hat had sat on many heads, though not as many as he would've liked this year. The wizarding world was still recovering and it was only this year, eleven years after the end of the war, that the number of new young wizards and witches was rising.

For a while there he worried that it would be the end of Hogwarts but now he dared to entertain some hope.

He had just sorted a couple of adorable twins into different houses when he felt it.

Divinity had come to Hogwarts. So subtle, so gentle yet unmistakable.

The hat was placed upon the last of the Pie family and for a moment it understood.

He wanted to tell her about all the amazing things that were locked in here, inside her head. He wanted to speak to her about where she came from, the horses and what that all meant. He wanted to tell her how blessed he felt, just being in her presence let alone being granted the privilege of sorting her.

He wanted to tell her all these thing and more but he could not.

"PUT ME IN THE HOUSE MOST IN NEED OF A PARTY!" She commanded with all her being.

And he could do naught but answer.

"..."

"..."

"SLYTHERIN!"

Author's Note

A/N Well this chapter turned in a bit of an old fashioned cluster...pluck with all these points of views and different timelines running through one another. I hope it made sense in the end, that's the only bit that matters anyway.

Chapter 8: First Day!

"Yay!"

Pinkie skipped towards the Slytherin table in stunned silence. She sat next to Daphne and an angry looking girl who sat in front of Pinkie.

The sorting quickly continued with Harry Potter who was sorted into Gryffindor after a particular long sorting to raucous applause from the Gryffindor table. Pinkie hoped that he would have fun there.

Once the sorting was completed Albus Dumbledore stood up from the head of the staff table.

"Before we start the feast I would first like to say a few words, and they are as follows: Nitwit, Blubber, Oddment, Tweak. Thank you."

Pinkie was giggle snorting uproariously at Headmaster Dumbledore's joke although in the entire school she seemed to be the only one.

"Geez, tough crowd."

The food appeared on the table and everyone started to dig in. Conversations started up on every table.

"Hi, I'm Pinkie Pie. What's your name?"

"Daphne Greengrass, charmed." She responded looking like she felt anything but, as she took a bite out of a piece of shepherds pie. Daphne quickly turned towards a boy on her right and started talking with him.

The angry looking girl regarded Pinkie for a long while.

"Hey are you any relation to the Pie family? You know the one that was wiped out by mysterious means?"

All the heads of the first year Slytherins turned back towards Pinkie with an audible whoosh.

Pinkie felt a bit put on the spot by all the sudden attention.

"Uhm… Yeah I guess."

She quickly grabbed some veggies to put on her plate. "Me and Albie tried to get some money from my family vault but it was empty." Pinkie didn't feel like sharing about the key and the creepy note. She felt that wasn't really appropriate dinner talk.

The big girl who introduced herself as Millicent Bulstrode. "So are you trying to tell me you're actually a pureblood?"

"I suppose..." Pinkie started munching loudly on some broccoli.

"Well then where were you all this time?" Millicent asked.

Pinkie swallowed with an audible gulp. "I was raised in an orphanage. It was great! I've made so many friends there."

Now that the subject didn't refer to… seven years ago she felt a lot more excited.

"I've got seven brothers and six sisters. There's Mark, Ricky, Timmy, Alfie, Nico, Duncan,
Lewis, Jillian, Cerys, Gracie, Iris, Maisie, Sophie and Phoebe. Oh, and Pinkie of course. And then there's Maddie she takes care of us."

Daphne looked at her unimpressed. "Must be wild."

"Oh, it is! Never a dull moment at Happy Oaks. That's what Maddie always says."

Pinkie grabbed some mashed potatoes and turned towards Daphne.

"So what's your story, morning glory?"

"No story I'm afraid. I was home schooled like most at this table."

"Really? Then how did you make friends?"

"Our families all know each other and organized meetings and parties when we were younger."

"Parties?" Pinkies attention peaked at the mention of parties. "What sort of parties?"

Daphne noticed the change in the pink haired menace and tried to be dismissive. "The sort of parties that serve tea."

"Oh, tea parties! I know about those. They go great with boardgames and art!"

Many at the Slytherin table had no idea what she was on about. Conversations continued but it became clear to Pinkie that she was the odd one out. Maybe it was because of her hair colour? It used to be a topic of contention way back in primary school. It couldn't be the pureblood thing because she was one.

She was about to comment about it when the food disappeared and Albus raised from his seat.

He started talking about the school rules and about not going in to the forbidden forest which made sense to Pinkie and then he said not to enter a corridor on the third floor to anyone who did not wish to die a most painful death.

Pinkie started laughing again and once more she was the only one.

"Geez, it's okay to smile you know."

The look in the eyes of headmaster Dumbledore told her however that he was quite serious.

Feeling a little awkward she waited for Albie to finish his speech and then it was time for the school song.

Words were conjured in mid-air so it was easy to sing along. Everyone did their own thing. There didn't seem to be much rhyme or reason to the melody.

As Pinkie was singing she noticed something though. Were the horses singing along? It was hard to tell. Peaceful yet joyfully energetic, the rhythm started something within herself.

Just when she started noticing this the music came to an end.

She didn't realise that the entirety of the Hogwarts student body never sang the song so harmonious before.

Albus rose once again from his seat after applauding jubilantly. "Ah music, a magic beyond any we do here at Hogwarts. Now of you trot. Big day of learning tomorrow."

Shuffling along with the rest of the first years towards the Slytherin common room. Pinkie was thinking upon the experience she just had. Did that always happen when she was singing and just didn't realise it?

She bumped into the backside of a second year. Apparently they had arrived

One of the prefects gave them the password for the entrance to the common room which was hiding behind a painting.

Then they entered the room proper. Everything had a green sheen to it because of the light that filtered through the windows. They were underneath the lake Pinkie realised and the water coloured it green. That's probably where Slytherin house got their colours from.

Neat.

She sat down in a comfy bean-bag looking thing and allowed herself to drift away for a moment as the hullabaloo around them died down.

Suddenly the other door opened and an ominous looking man entered the room. His cloak was billowing as he glided menacingly towards the centre of the room.

"I am professor Snape."

Pinkie quickly said upright and gave this man her full attention.

"And you are the privileged few who were sorted in the most noble house of Slytherin. Many of you know the about the stigma of being a Slytherin." He turned his coal black eyes towards Pinkie.

"Some of you do not..."

"Because of this reason there are a few extra rules that every Slytherin must abide by lest they suffer my... displeasure."

The mood in the room changed. It seemed like everyone was very seriously listening to what professor Snape had to say.

"First, I expect each and every one of you to give your utmost in your classes. I require at least 'Exceed Expectations' on two subjects and an 'Outstanding' on a third."

There was am audible gulp coming from the direction of two burly looking boys.

"Second. I expect each and everyone of you to be the shining exemplars of cunning and ambition that our house is known for. Should anyone get caught doing any rule breaking the consequences will be dire."

The message was obvious. Don't get caught.

Pinkie didn't get it.

"Third, Slytherin comes first. Our house is the most contentious of all the houses within Hogwarts therefore I will not suffer any infighting."

These rules seemed perfectly reasonable to Pinkie. Do good in school, don't break the rules and no fighting fellow Slytherins.

Hold on a second!

Did that mean that fighting the other houses was okay? Nah she was sure that professor Snape just phrased it a little awkwardly.

She was thinking about the other rules that professor Snape had outlined, wondering how hard it would be to get an outstanding in a subject as they were shepherded down the stairs towards their respective dormitories.

Slytherin had two people to a room with the rooms for girls on the left and the rooms for boys on the right. It was stressed that boys were not allowed into the rooms meant for girls lest they suffer extreme awkwardness.

Pinkie entered one of the first year female rooms. Sadly it was already occupied by Pansy and Daphne who did not take kindly to her intrusion. Pansy rather rudely requested that she leave the room using some very mean words.

Pinkie was a both saddened and confused by the hostility. Particularly after professor Snape's speech. Thankfully Millicent Bulstrode walked past and told Pinkie that she would room with her, though she made sure to tell Pinkie it was because they were the only ones left.

To Pinkie it seemed that Millicent was also one to be a little left out. She was quite… Pinkie didn't want to say chunky. That would be hypocritical after all she herself would winter quite well also.

However Millicent did seem to have something going on with her eyebrows that made it seem like she was permanently angry.

Sophie would call it resting bitch face Pinkie knew. She briefly wondered how the orphanage was doing without her there to bake bread and pies.

"This is my side, that's your side. If you stay on your side there will be no trouble."

Pinkie snapped out of her reminiscing.

"Oki doki!"

She started unpacking her trunk humming a silly song. She placed a multitude of pictures from the orphanage on the bedside table. Her clothes were already placed inside the small wardrobe.

Who did that? She wondered. Did Hogwarts just teleport her clothes around? Could it do that if she was wearing them?

There were still some pictures left over so she put them on the small desk along with her beatbox.

She tried turning it on but it appeared that the flyers were true and that it wouldn't work inside Hogwarts proper. It would only play alpine jodeling. Pinkie wasn't in the mood for that.

Next she put some plushies on her bed and placed balloons in every corner that she was allowed to go.

"What in Merlin's Camelot is that?"

Millicent was pointing at her balloon array floating above her desk.

"They're balloons, silly."

"I know they're balloons you absolute spazzoid. Why are they above your desk?"

"Because it feels like a party?"

"Do I look like I'm in a partying mood?"

"You look like an angry bear. I thought tha-"

"Graaaaaah!"

Millicent suddenly charged Pinkie and they tumbled to the ground. Millicent started trying to hit Pinkie in the face but Pinkie was trained in the orphanage style of fighting. This meant scratching, hair-pulling, biting, kicking unmentionables, eye-gauging and spitting if necessary.

Seven years in an orphanage taught her well enough.

Although Millicent had the weight advantage Pinkies technique proved superior. She was about to put Millicent in a full Nelson when their door opened up.

"What is the meaning of this?"

A prefect.

"Uhm, we fell down some stairs?" Pinkie tried.

"Cute. Five points from each of you for this appalling behaviour. Now go and see madam Pomfrey in the hospital wing. I hope for your sake that this is over or I will inform our head of house."

xxx

Millicent and Pinkie slogged their way through the Hogwarts halls.

"Which way is the hospital wing?"

"I'm new here too bubble brain."

"Why do you keep calling me names?"

"..."

Luckily, after a frustrating amount of time some older students were willing to help them out to get where they needed to go.

xxx

Poppy Pomfrey was not amused at the state that two first years entered her hospital wing. Scratches, bruises and hair at odd angles meant muggle fighting. Years as a healer at a boarding school gave her such insights.

"We fell down some stairs." The one with weird hair said.

"Together, did you?" Poppy gave them a look filled with incredulity.

"They moved." The other one said.

"Right."

Poppy did some quick diagnostic spells on them and found only superficial injuries. Some rudimentary healing spells later and they were good to go.

She gave them a permission slip to go back to their common room after curfew and send them on their way.

xxx

"Goodnight Milly."

"Fuck you Pinkie."

xxx

The next morning saw both Millicent and Pinkie looking bleary eyed at breakfast. Millicent sat with Daphne and Pansy giving Pinkie dirty looks as she ate her food.

Pinkie looked towards the Gryffindor table as she was chewing. She saw Neville, Hermione, Harry and Ron having fun with one another. She was beginning to regret asking the hat to put her where the hat had put her.

"Put me in the house most in need of a party." That's what she wanted.

That's it! Maybe she just needed to organise a little shindig in the common room. That way she was sure to get in the other girls' good graces.

She needed help in organisation. More importantly she needed a place to bake.

Pinkie was thinking so hard that she didn't notice that the Slytherin table was deserted. Quickly she made her way towards the dungeons. It was time for potions class.

xxx

"Potter! What would I get if I added powdered root of asphodel to an infusion of wormwood?"

Hermione's hand shot up.

"I don't know sir."

"Clearly fame isn't everything. Let's try again. Where would you look if I asked you to find me a bezoar?"

Pinkie was raising her hand as well trying to catch professor Snape's attention. She wanted to ask if her prior education had been lacking since she didn't know the answer either.

"I don't know sir." Harry said quietly. "I think Pinkie does though. Maybe you should try her?"

"A point will be taken for you cheek, Potter."

Professor Snape proceeded to give the answers to the questions he just raised and snidely went on about aconite or something. Pinkie lowered her hand when the potions instructor insulted Hermione's arm flailing.

Pinkie suspected the only reason she was spared any insults was because she was a Slytherin and honestly that would be blatant favouritism. Maybe the potions professor was just having a bad day?

Professor Snape conjured an assignment on the board. It were the instructions to create a potion that if prepared right would cure boils.

"Now, I assume all of you can read." Snape said looking around the classroom expecting to find those who couldn't. "Since I don't trust anyone of you enough to actually follow the instructions I shall put you in pairs. Maybe two heads are better then one."

Pinkie was looking around for anyone but it seemed like she and Hermione were the only ones who hadn't found anyone. Seeing nothing for it a Gryffindor-Slytherin team up seemed like it could be fun to Pinkie.

Hermione was setting up the cauldron putting it on medium flame as Pinkie went to get the other supplies. She tripped over Draco's foot on the way back but luckily she was able to keep the ingredients from falling.

"So how is life in Gryffindor?" Pinkie asked Hermione. "In Slytherin it's all very interesting. Did you know that our common room is underneath the great lake? How cool is that! I wonder if I'll see miss Squid again from the windows sometime."

"Hmm?… Could you help me crush the snake fangs?" Hermione kept glancing back and forth from her potions book and the blackboard, making sure that the instructions added up.

"The instructions are not in line, surely it is preparation time?"

Hermione looked away from her book. Did Pinkie just talk in a funny voice? And why did she rhyme? Before she could comment Pinkie shoved her out of the way.

xxx

For the following two hours Hermione was rather stunned by the proficiency that Pinky showed in potions. She new that Pinkie loved baking and cooking so maybe the two skills were supportive of one another?

Finding herself in an assistant role was a rather unique experience as well. In her prior school she was forced to take the lead in group projects more often then not. But Pinkie seemed rather forceful.

"Do not be so hasty." She said. "Or our potion will not be tasty."

Now she was getting concerned. The potion was not supposed to be tasty it was supposed to be a cure for boils. She was so busy following Pinkies instructions that she forgot to look at the blackboard and missed the fact that they weren't even following them.

Panic set in.

It was to late now though. They had only five minutes left. When she looked around the room some other potions were already turning red. Some were even turning pink which was an indication of a superior potion.

Her and Pinkies potion was turning towards a happily bubbling periwinkle blue.

She was about to really lay it on her but before she could professor Snape bellowed across the room.

"Time's up!" He stood up from behind his desk and started roaming around giving judgemental remarks at everyone.

Neville had suffered a rather explosive error during the lesson and had to be carted of to the hospital wing. Hermione noticed during that exchange that Snape really had it in for Harry who he blamed for the whole ordeal causing points to be lost for Gryffindor. Now he was raving on about Ron and Harry's potion. He was probably really going to blow his top when he saw her and Pinkies monstrosity.

Hermione started hyperventilating as she'd never gotten bad marks before. This was really starting to mess with her identity, she was supposed to be smart! How could she let this happen? Stupid Pinkie and her stupid rhymes! She ruined everything!

"What is this?" Snape was inspecting their potion and didn't look impressed.

"It's boil removing potion." Pinkie chipperly responded.

"Is it?" Snape sneered.

"Uh huh."

"Then let's find out." Snape ordered the entirety of the class towards the hospital wing. Neville was lying in bed there still covered in boils being examined by madam Pomfrey. He looked embarrassed of having the entire class look at him like this.

"Madam Pomfrey? I've brought a fresh batch of boil healing potion."

"Yes and an entire group of first years. Why are they in my hospital wing?" She seemed thoroughly annoyed.

"I thought it would be educational to see one of their potions at work and maybe help poor Neville here at the same time."

"I see." She still looked annoyed but could see where he was coming from. The world was in desperate need of more healers and maybe this would help coax more students among their ranks.

Professor Snape did his own diagnostic spells upon Neville and then poured Pinkie's and Hermione's potion down his throat.

At first he was struggling against it but then he gulped it down quite happily.

"Hmm, tastes like sweet lime pie."

Snape looked disgusted at Neville. "It's not supposed to taste like sweet lime pie. It's supposed to taste like a bowl of snot."

Still his boils started to disappear leaving behind healthy looking skin.

"Five points from Gryffindor for making a potion that tastes good."

"It appears to me that children actually wanting to take there medicine is good idea." Madam Pomfrey said.

"That's debatable, we wouldn't want children drinking random potions now would we."

"Debatable indeed especially since your first year students came up with a completely new potion for removing boils in their first lesson." Madam Pomfrey gave Snape a stern look that he couldn't ignore.

"...One point to Gryffindor for making a completely new boil removal potion in their first lesson."

Hermione looked afronted. "And Slytherin." She said. "Pinkie is in Slytherin."

Pinkie was busy talking to Neville making sure he was okay and making him laugh.

"Oh right so she is. Ten poi-"

Another look from madam Pomfrey.

Professor Snape deflated some. "One point to Slytherin for the same reason."

"Maybe the point reduction for Gryffindor should was a bit harsh as well?"

"Fine, no point reduction. But if you find first years chugging Draught of the living Death don't come crying to me." His robe bellowed dramatically as he left the hospital wing.

"This lesson is over."

"That man." Madam Pomfrey sighed. "Always so dramatic."

Pinkie joined her side at Neville's bed.

"I'll say. I've stopped trying to drink drain cleaner since I was eight."

The whole class looked at her like she was crazy.

"Oh, come on that was funny!"

xxx

Hermione and Pinkie went their separate ways. The Slytherins were going to charms class and the Gryffindors were… Pinkie wasn't really paying attention.

Making potions was really fun Pinkie thought as she was walking towards her next class, but professor Snape was in dire need of a hug. Pinkie was going to get on that real quick right after finding a place to bake in preparation for her party.

She entered the charms classroom early and was met with a small professor standing on a lectern that was comically raised to make him able to see the entire classroom.

Pinkie quickly sat in the centre of the room. She was excited to learn how to use her wand properly. The lesson hadn't started yet as she was looking around the room she noticed that the walls of the classroom was filled with countless books. From what she could see these were all books about charms.

"Hermione would love it here." She thought thinking about her friend. Hermione really was her first friend in the magical world. The thought gave her hope that the Slytherins would end up maybe liking her too.

As the rest of her class came in, Ravenclaws and Slytherins both, the short professor started introducing himself.

"Good afternoon ladies and gentleman. I am professor Filius Flitwick and today you will experience your first charms lesson." He tapped his lectern with his wand and a big word appeared on the blackboard: Lumos

"Everyone get your wands out, we're going to have some fun!"

The professor's squeaky voice and enthusiasm immediately endeared the professor to Pinkie. This lesson was going to be great!

With wand in hand she eagerly listened how professor Flitwick started explaining the Lumos charm. It was a simple charm that made your wand create light. You just had to say Lumos and your wand would light up.

All around the classroom people were shouting lumos, lighting up their wands. Some were rather dim like Pansy's and some were rather strong like Daphne's. Lisa Turpin who sat next to Pinkie was rather proud waving her gentle light around trying to write her name in mid-air.

"Give it a go Pinkie!" Lisa said.

"Lumos!" Pinkie shouted.

"PWEP!" Responded her wand as a party whistle came rolling out and back in.

Lisa and Pinkie looked a little surprised at her wand and then at each other.

"Lumos!" She tried again.

"Pwep?" Her wand responded a little less peppy this time.

Pinkie was confused by her wands behaviour. She was gathering quite a few stares as she tried hitting her wand on the back of the handle like a bottle of ketchup hoping to unclog it or something.

"Lumos!"

"Poof!"

A cluster of confetti exploded out of her wand covering her desk, herself and Lisa who didn't really seem to mind.

Professor Flitwick noticed the commotion and went to investigate.

"What seems to be the problem?" He asked with a friendly demeanour.

"Lumos!"

"Pwep!" Pinkie's wand went again.

"O, this is new."

Smiling Flitwick grabbed a nearby chair and stood on top to reach the desk. "Okay, show me again?"

"Lumos!"

"PWEP!" More enthusiastic this time. Pinkie didn't know what was going on but her wand seemed to be having a ball.

"Hmm, I see." Flitwick said. "Pinkie I need you to really focus on trying to create light. Not to just shout the words."

Pinkie closed her eyes and imagined a light in the darkness.

"Lumos!"

"Pweep!" Her wand responded jovially. Though this time their was a small light at the tip of the party whistle.

Flitwick sighed, though not in a concerned way. "Why don't you stay a little while after class Pinkie?"

Pansy and Draco were laughing in the corner. She heard them whispering. "..can't even do a light spell..."

The lesson continued but Pinkie wasn't really feeling it. She made few more half-hearted attempts at making magic happen but her wand just kept throwing it's own party.

Pinkie knew the sentiment but there was a time and a place wand!

xxx

Professor Flitwick finished the lesson with some lecturing about charms and reading homework. He waited patiently for everyone to leave to give Pinkie some more advise.

Pinkie was lazily waving her wand around trying to make something else happen instead of confetti and party noises. It was proving difficult after having concentrated so long during the lesson. She was getting pretty tired from today's events and could really use a nap to be honest.

Professor Flitwick was watching her trying to cast the Lumos spell closely. Sometimes it would work and sometimes it wouldn't but it would always come with a party whistle though it started to sound rather sad and tired.

"I'm going to give you some extra homework Pinkie as I'm sure you would've guessed." He told her in a chipper tone.

"...Great."

"Come come, don't be like that. I can tell you are improving."

That did lighten Pinkies mood considerably

"I want you to find a quiet place to practise somewhere without any distractions. Really try to focus on light and nothing else for the charm. See if you can stop your wand from throwing parties whenever it wants."

"But I like parties."

"So do I, but sometimes it is more useful to throw a spell then to throw a party."

"I guess..." Pinkie looked at her wand and thought about how she got it. Maybe it was a bad wand after all.

"Do you think I maybe have a bad wand?"

"If the wand was meant for you it was meant for you. So it's not the wand no. It's lack of focus, plain and simple."

Professor Flitwick started his preparing for his next class.

"Keep practising Pinkie! You'll be able to do it in no time, you'll see. I believe in you!"

"Thanks professor!" She shouted as she left the classroom. She left her last cupcake on her desk for him. She really appreciated his help and sunny enthusiasm. It helped her realise that her life hadn't turned all gloomy. It was just changing and she needed to change with it.

xxx

Agent (REDACTED) Field report #748-3289

Target ALPHA seemed above average but within standard parameters. Does not appear to be popular with peers within Slytherin house.

Target ALPHA appears to have genius talent for potions and left one of her signature weapons in the classroom.

Field agent (REDACTED) feared to give in to temptation and disposed of the MCC (Mind-control confections) using Fiendfire.

Agent (REDACTED) regrets the loss of opportunity for study but could not risk loss of faculties at this time.

Requesting expedited (REDACTED) order of target ALPHA. Target ALPHA is exposed.

Target BRAVO is average and asocial though attempts to fit in seem successful.

Target Bravo seems not aware of wizarding etiquette confirming suspicion of an unmagical and poor upbringing.

Protections on target BRAVO seem insurmountable at this time.

xxx

PRIORITY CORRESPONDENCE FROM (CODENAME: ZEUS) TO FIELD AGENT (REDACTED) CONCERNING FIELD REPORT #748-3289

DO NOT ENGAGE TARGET ALPHA.

TARGET ALPHA IS NOT EXPOSED.

THAT IS WHAT SHE WANTS YOU TO THINK.

YOU IDIOT.

TARGET BRAVO NO LONGER A PRIORITY.

FOCUS ALL EFFORTS ON TARGET ALPHA.

THIS MESSAGE WILL SELF-DESTRUCT WITHIN FIVE SECONDS AFTER READING.

xxx

Professor Flitwick watched as the message burst into flames leaving not even ashes behind.

Author's Note

I hate this chapter!! BLAAAAARGARBlegraablle

Chapter 9: Party at Slytherin

It hadn't been a great week for Pinkie Pie. Her magic was on the fritz, her Slytherin housemates were bullying her, a fact she could no longer ignore.

But the absolute worst thing, the single most terrible thing, was that she couldn't find the bloody kitchen!

She was starting to show signs of baking withdrawal. Signs which were obvious in hindsight. The incident at the start of the week was a clear indication.

xxx

"Can I sit here for a bit?" Pinkie was looking for some camaraderie after having yet another row with Pansy. She needed a place to sort of deflate.

"No you can't." Ron said. "You're a traitor! You made us like you, but now it turns out you're a Slytherin!"

Pinkie looked shocked. Was this house thing really so important?

Harry wanted to say something but he looked like he'd never seen two friends fight before and was utterly lost. He wished Hermione was here but she was currently in the library.

He was about to say something to Ron when he shouted something really mean and Pinkie started to cry.

For a short moment Pinkie looked utterly frightening to Harry. Maybe it was a trick of the light because of the setting sun but it looked like her hair was on fire.

He got distracted however by a bout of accidental magic flinging Ron's food in his face.

When he looked up Pinkie had ran away.

"Oh, well done mate!" He said to Ron sarcastically feeling anger towards his friend for the first time.

"That was a real class act."

Harry left to try to find Pinkie but couldn't find her.

xxx

Yup baking withdrawal. That's what that was. Irritability, imagined smells that weren't there.

Cinnamon, baking bread, different kinds of fruit…

Pinkie walked through some abandoned corridor when she couldn't take it any more.

"Where are the stupid kitchens in this stupid place?!"

"Poof."

A soft crack just beyond the intersection removed Pinkie from her funk.

She went to investigate and found one of the oddest creatures she'd ever seen. It had enormous ears, big bulbous eyes that currently looked a little frightened and it wore what Pinkie thought was a tea towel toga.

"Hi, I'm Pinkie Pie." She tried hoping to maybe calm the creature down. "What's your name?"

"The Grand Mistress wants to know Blubber's name! O Blubber is truly blessed! Blubber's not worthy." He made a very deep deferential bow.

Pinkie was mistaken, it wasn't fear she saw in his eyes but some sort of weird devotion.

"So… Blubber then?"

"Yes! Oh The Grand Mistress is so smart to figure that out!"

"I'm not your mistress silly filly. I'm Pinkie Pie." she tapped her chest twice. "Pinkie Pie." she said more slowly.

For some reason this made him look very sad but Pinkie didn't know why.

"Did you lose your mistress somewhere?"

"Blubber never had a mistress, Grand Mistress. Blubber was born without a family."

Pinkie felt genuine compassion for this little creature.

"Well we've got something in common then. I'm an orphan too." She said and petted him on top of his bald head right between the ears.

"Blubber can help The Grand Mistress towards the kitchens if The Grand Mistress wants. Blubber would be honoured."

"Thanks Blubber I appreciate it."

As they made their way toward the kitchens Blubber explained that he was a house elf and responsible for maintenance and laundry in Slytherin house.

"Can you teleport clothes?" Pinkie asked remembering her moving stuff on the first day.

"Yes Grand Mistress Blubber can."

"Even when another person is wearing them?"

"Blubber doesn't like where this conversation is going. Blubber wants to be a good elf."

"Just wondering if you could."

Before he could respond they had arrived at a painting of a pear. Blubber told Pinkie to tickle the pear and that would allow the human entrance to appear.

She raised her hand to start tickling but before she could the door swung open eagerly.

The impression occurred in Pinkie that the castle was waiting for her to come here which was kinda silly but it made her feel welcome. A feeling which she was missing as of late.

Pinkie and Blubber entered a room where a lot of activity was going on.

A cavalcade of house elves were about to make tonight's dinner. Elves were running around to and fro with pots and pans looking eager to get started.

One of them was wearing a makeshift chef's hat made out of some old parchment that a student had doodled on. He looked very busy indeed orchestrating the elves with an old spoon.

"Nitwit! What have I told you about overworking the dough?"

"Uhm..." He looked like he was really thinking about it. "Not to do it?"

"Yes, not to do it! Now make it again."

The elf ran away giddily to start anew with his task.

"…Silly elf worked the dough so hard it started demanding overtime..."

Suddenly an elf dropped a pan with a loud clatter silencing everything in the room.

"It's her..." The one who dropped the pan said and promptly fainted.

Some elves quickly carried him of, waving a kerchief in his face while the elf with the chefs hat turned towards Pinkie.

"How may we assist The Grand Mistress." He gave her a bow just like Blubber did taking his hat off in deference.

Pinkie feeling really nervous with all this sudden attention resorting to her standard greeting #23.

"Uhm... Hi? I'm Pinkie Pie. I wanted to... You know what? I can see you're all very busy. I shouldn't add more work. I'll just leave you guys to it."

One of the elves burst into tears.

"There there, I'm sure she didn't mean it." An elf said patting the crying one on the back.

Pinkie expression went from nervousness to mortified very quickly.

"I'm sorry?"

"And she's so-ho-ho-rry We're not worthy. Not worthy-hy-hy-hy!" He was bawling his eyes out on the shoulder of another elf.

Pinkie really didn't know what to do with all this awkwardness decided perhaps wisely to keep quiet.

The elf with the chefs hat motioned towards Pinkie. "Perhaps it would be best if we speak in private."

"Is he going to be alright?"

The crying elf's voice had reached a pitch only audible by dogs.

"He's fine." He pointed at a door on the side. "Please, Grand Mistress."

The room had a cosy rustic feeling though the furniture was rather small. It seemed to be one meant for elves with one chair sort of enlarged. Probably meant for human sitters.

"So how can the house elves of Hogwarts help The Grand Mistress?"

The Grand Mistress again. Pinkie thought they must call everyone something like that to make them feel special or something.

Now that the opportunity to bake popped around maybe something else could be arranged. She made a split second decision and changed her plans.

"I need to organise a party in the Slytherin common room. A classy one. I want to use it as an opportunity to make some friends and bury some hatchets."

"Hmm, you should talk to the Sommelier he knows a lot about high end parties. We usually do what he tells us to do."

Pinkie knew a thing or two about parties. She wasn't about to let some upstart house elf tell her how to throw one. Still someone to bounce ideas of off was never a bad thing. Perhaps she needed to test him a little bit.

"Is he in?"

"I've never known him not to be."

He guided her to another room in the back. When she was about to enter he bowed again and opened the door for her.

The room was cosily dark with interesting bottles which turned out to be elvish wine. She wondered what that would taste like when she heard a voice.

"Good afternoon miss Pie. We've waited a long time."

She turned around and found an elf that appeared different from the others. He had a suave looking suite on with a bow tie and had a very deep voice. Much deeper then the squeaky sound of the other elves.

"I'd like a tasting." She found herself saying. He could talk the talk, let's see if he could walk the walk.

The elf merrily nodded as he glided to a nearby cupboard and grabbed two plates.

"We are aware of your past fondness for the German varietals but I can wholeheartedly endorse our new breed of Austrians."

He placed the food in front of Pinkie along with a fork.

"Strudel whipped-cream and vanilla sauce."

Pinkie took a bite out of one, rolling it around in her mouth making sure that it didn't leave a powdery texture at the roof of it, which can happen with pastry like this.

"Light puffy dough. Soft juicy filling for easier chewing, and I know you'll appreciate our crunchy coating."

Pinkie swallowed and nodded to the elf. He knew his stuff. It was exactly as described.

"What's next?" He asked.

"I'll need something robust...precise."

"...Robust...Precise…" He raised and eyebrow like he just had an idea and reached over a nearby shelf to grab a box of chocolates.

He opened the box and presented them to Pinkie.

She took one and started sucking on it and then chewed it testing both methods of consumption.

"Cocoa Tangerine: Shaped like a blue finch. Toffee type candy with an optional pepper-up carrier. Citrus fruit filling with 1-6 fermentation."

Pinkie swallowed and approved.

"Could you recommend something for the end of the night? Something big, bold?"

The sommelier reached underneath the bar and pulled out a plate that looked like dinner.

"May I suggest: our Tortellini Roquefort?"

Pinkie inspected a tortellini with her fingers making sure the sauce was not to sticky and took a bite. Taste-buds were checking if the flavours were well in balance and the cheese was not overpowering.

"Molten rich cheese and glace-herbal. Cheering charms should your guests get...cold."

Pinkie swallowed loudly.

"An Italian classic."

He winked. Roquefort was French.

He seemed to know exactly what Pinkie was planning with this party if the food was anything to go by.

"Dessert?"

He smiled. "Dessert."

He opened the bar like a trapdoor to show a myriad flavours of ice-cream.

"The finest dairy. All freshly mixed."

He gave Pinkie a spoon who held it up.

"Shall I have everything send to the common room?"

"Yes, thank you."

"Excellent."

Pinkie was about to leave the room.

"Oh and miss Pie?"

She turned around with her hand on the door handle.

"Do enjoy your party..."

xxx

Millicent Bullstrode sat in a corner watching the party and listening with one ear to the smooth music played by the elves, with the other to the gossip discussing who could've organised this particular soiree. The amount of snobbery on display really made her stomach churn.

It was all so vapid.

She saw Daphne in her element shmoozing with Blaise and Pansy. Millicent could see that Pansy was trying to get Blaise's attention but not doing a good job of it.

And all of them were completely phoney.

Millicent was never very good at the phoney bit and everyone knew it. They would call her boorish and vulgar behind her back and she would pretend not to hear to keep the status quo.

Honestly sometimes she could just scream and punch something.

Vulgar… Right.

She took one of the chocolates presented by the elves. It tasted kind of fruity and afterwards she felt a little better so she tried to do a bit of mingling of her own.

Talking with Draco was always such a chore though so she ignored him. Maybe the light was on at Crabbe or Goyle today. If nothing else it could be funny to hear their theories about this party and it's mysterious host.

xxx

Pinkie was about to make her grand entrance. The elves gave her a pretty dress for the occasion and right now she was holding the sides tightly mentally preparing herself for some proper snobby partying.

She was greeted by stares when she entered the Slytherin common room but only for a moment. Pinkie noticed that the closest group. Daphne, Blaise and Pansy were talking animatedly.

A good opening act to introduce the new Pinkie.

"Hello is everyone here having a good time?"

Pansy looked at her with utter disdain. "What's it to you? Don't you have to roll in the mud somewhere or whatever your kind does? Why don't you leave us be."

Pinkie just about had it with Pansy's mean attitude. She was just have to outclass her with more class. She turned towards Blaise.

"I'm so sorry it has been awhile for my to be in such exemplary company such as yourselves but isn't it considered bad manners to insult your host in an event such as this?"

You could hear a pin drop. It was in fact very bad manners to insult your host and everyone knew it, except for Pinkie ironically. It was the sort of situation that forced Pansy to make her excuses and leave the common room altogether. Before she left though she gave Draco the heads up on their hosts identity.

Ten points to Pinkie Pie. Daphne thought as she sipped her butter-beer.

"You organised all this?" Blaise asked "How did you swing that?"

"Oh, I met this charming little fellow called the Sommelier this morning."

A lot of pins could be heard dropping after that little bombshell. Daphne was one of the few who knew of the legend. It was said that the Sommelier represented the key to Hogwarts. Or something of that nature she couldn't really remember.

"We planned this little party together" Pinkie continued. She wanted to elaborate more on the subject but the elf who was playing the alto sax in the corner was shaking his head furiously indicating that she really shouldn't. Perhaps the Sommelier didn't like the attention or maybe something else was going on. In any case Pinkie decided to respect his privacy.

"And we had great fun doing that."

Quick to change the subject she indicated the dinner tables that had appeared conveniently to do so.

"Shall we get started on dinner everyone?" Pinkie asked as she clapped her hands together.

Millicent sat down opposite Pinkie with Draco on her left and Goyle on her right with Crabbe next to him. Pinkie had Blaise on her left and Daphne on her right.

Once everyone was seated the food appeared with a magical flourish to the delight of many. The smell was heavenly with a strong herbal note that was just to die for.

"My favourite!" Blaise exclaimed as he attacked the food with as much gusto that decorum would allow.

All around conversations started picking up and the mood at the table was very pleasant indeed. People were talking about quidditch. A sport which Pinkie knew nothing about.

Surprisingly it was Crabbe and Goyle who explained things for her. They were remarkably gentle souls despite their bullish countenance though they didn't seem overly bright to Pinkie. They'd probably follow whoever was the loudest.

Draco didn't seem impressed by their show of camaraderie and started asking Pinkie snippy questions.

"So how did someone of your...stature acquire the aid of the Hogwarts elves?"

"Don't worry about it Draco. The elves don't really care how tall you are. I'm certain they'll help someone as vertically challenged as you if you just ask them nicely."

Daphne had to hide her smirk behind her glass but Blaise had no compunction to hide anything and laughed out loud. Millicent who caught Draco's mopey expression couldn't contain herself either.

Millicent always appreciated Blaise's candour. He didn't seem as phoney as the others and he was well liked by everyone anyway. A true slytherin… Or more like a human capybara.

"I'm glad we can all sit at the same table now. I always knew that friendships were made at parties. You just need to find the right kind." Pinkie said trying to make sure that Draco wouldn't feel to bullied.

Although most at the table did not agree with that at all civility dictated they kept their peace. If the goal of the party was to cease hostility towards her she really couldn't have played it better and they respected that at least. The glasses were raised and the butter-beer was drunk.

"Everyone, may I have your attention for a little while longer?" Pinkie stood up from her chair so she was easily visible for everyone.

"I'm sure by now you're all clamouring for some dessert."

A chorus of yeah's and sure's barrelled through the room.

"Well ladies and gentleman, for that we're going to have to go for a little walk."

She walked towards the common room exit.

"If you would follow me?"

The gaggle of first year Slytherins were lead all the way up the astronomy tower where warming charms were placed to keep the brisk Scottish weather at bay.

Here elves were passing around small crystal cups of ice-cream. Everyone got a flavour they'd never had before and many found a new favourite.

Still, questions started to rise what the whole point of having them walk all the way up the astronomy tower was when a loud explosion turned their heads.

Fireworks.

They lit up the faces of the children and for a moment all masks fell away as they all stared in wonder.

The magical fireworks exploded at eye level and was visible for everyone. It was clear that Slytherin had the best seats in the house.

Except for Pansy who was stuck in her room currently wondering what that racket was.

They were basking in the moment majesty with a sense of peace. Lovely ice-cream with second helpings and a show as well was a real treat and everyone knew it.

Sadly like all fireworks shows this one ended all to briefly and the way down the tower had a distinct different vibe. The mood was oddly...contemplative and relaxed. There wasn't a lot of talking going on. Except for a few.

Pinkie and Daphne were talking though unlike the other Slytherins Daphne had her mask on and was in full shmoozing mode. Trying to figure out how exactly this whole thing got organized.

They rounded a corner when both of them and Millicent as well were covered in a bucket of weird slime that turned their hair bright orange.

The Weasley twins jumped from behind a nearby a decorative piece of armour and started jeering.

"Well now the Slytherins really are slimy." One said.

The other one looked a bit concerned "Brother of mine I do believe we've missed our target."

"Indeed? Well in my defence when you've seen one blond Slytherin boy you've seen them all."

Daphne looked at them with utter loathing. "I'm a girl you pair of absolute pillocks!" she said as the other firsties were rounding the corner.

Slytherin brotherhood being what it was the twins were soon outnumbered.

"Well as funny as this is I do believe it's time for us to leave this dungeon."

"Tata." The other one said as he threw something on the ground as they disappeared in a poof of smoke. Leaving nothing but laughter in their wake.

Pinkie looked outraged "They've ruined the dress the elves made for me!"

The Hogwarts elves did not dispense pretty dresses willy-nilly. Not to mention organise fireworks. What in Merlins name was up with Pinkie? Daphne thought.

"They've ruined my party's aftervibes!… Nobody ruins my party and gets away with it!"

"Daphne and Millicent looked at each other shocked by the shear waves of anger running of the normally so gentle girl. Not even Pansy warranted this kind of reaction.

"This means war!" Pinkie shouted towards the heavens with a fist raised to the sky.

"Daphne, Milly I know you don't like me but I hope you guys are willing to negotiate a truce for the insult they have given to our hair, our clothes and our house. Those Weasley twins need to be brought low!"

Daphne was shocked by Pinkie's assessment. She didn't...not like Pinkie, though she did sometimes laugh at Pansy's insults. It was all fair… Wasn't it?

She found herself slowly extending her hand as was Millicent.

Pinkie shook their hands with rigorous enthusiasm.

As the rest of the first year contingent was wondering what in Merlin's name just happened. Pinkie was looking towards the future.

"Now." She said. "I need an accordion."

Author's Note

Smooth jazz played by the elves at the dinner party

Chapter 10: A Plot of Revenge

As the first year Slytherins shuffled their way into the common room and from their into their beds, three freshly made redheads sat down and started to plot their righteous revenge.

"We could spread shameful rumours that will ruin the standing with their families?" Daphne suggested. "Misconduct of the lecherous sort is always effective."

"We should kick 'em in the gentleman's plums. That'll teach 'm a lesson." Millicent opined as she was shadow kicking her imagined enemy's in the goolies.

Pinkie listened to their suggestions with interest. "Those ideas could really get us in trouble… And they seem kinda mean spirited."

Daphne looked at Pinkie like she was stupid. "Of course they're mean spirited. It's revenge, not a hugfest magicon." She started to think that maybe she should plot this revenge thing on her own. "How is an accordion of all things going to help anyway?"

Pinkie beckoned the two girls closer. Millicent kicked the air one last time and made her way around the table. Pinkie pulled the other girls around her and started whispering in their ears.

"Oh." Said Millicent. "That is rather devious actually."

Daphne was pondering things through."We would look like beautiful vengeful valkerie."

"And the weasel twins look like they can't take a joke if they get all moody about it."

Daphne got her notebook out. "This will require a lot of planning. There are a few logistical problems."

"Leave it to me!" Pinkie jumped up from her seat in excitement. I think the elves can help me find the right tools and a place to practice.

Millicent looked thoughtful. "We're going to need outside help as well. Some of these spells will at least require a fifth year."

"Well let's go ask one then!" Pinkie ran of to the dormitories and started knocking on doors of the older students.

One of these doors was opened by a serious looking fifteen year old by name of Archibald de Vries, a Dutch transfer student known for his skill with a wand, particularly in the junior duelling courts.

"What happened to your hair?" He asked the firsties.

"Never mind that. Would you like to help us with our dastardly plan of revenge?"

"You know how this song and dance goes. What's in it for me?"

"You get to hex the Weasley twins into a confusing oblivion and no one will think it was you."

"...Go on."

The girls in crime whispered in his ear and explained the plan in exquisite detail.

"Pinkie I would pay to do that."

Hands got shook and it was getting late so they decided to leave their scheming for the next day. It was better to scheme with a well rested mind after all.

xxx

Goodnight Milly.

Goodnight Pinkie.

xxx

It was a beautiful morning at Hogwarts. The birds were singing. The sky was blue and three little girls with orange hair were making their way towards the kitchen to request aid from the elves.

Pinkie was about to tickle the pear to gain entrance but it once again swung open without preamble.

The kitchens weren't nearly as hectic as last time. One of the elves came up to them and greeted them with enthusiasm.

"How may the elves help the Grand Mistress today?"

Millicent and Daphne looked at each other.

"Grand mistress?" Daphne mouthed.

Millicent shrugged, elves were just weird sometimes.

Pinkie didn't notice the exchange. "Well I just wanted to thank all of you for the terrific job done yesterday. The fireworks were fantastic and the music was full of pep and very classy."

The young elf seemed to shine from the praise "I'll be sure to pass it along."

"Now speaking of music, do you have any idea where we can find some instruments to practice with? Maybe a secluded room as well so we don't bother anyone?"

The elf jumped up and down in excitement and clapped his hands together. "O I sure do Mistress. On the seventh floor you'll find a tapestry of Barnebas the Barmy trying to teach trolls how to dance. Opposite the tapestry is the room you require."

The elf wrote down all instructions to find the room and how to enter it. He gave the parchment to the girls.

"Be sure to follow the instructions or the room won't appear. It's very picky."

Pinkie grabbed the elf and gave him a big hug and kissed him on his bald head. "Thank you so much mister elf! This will help us loads."

The poor elf looked a mix between happy and insulted.

"...It's miss elf actually."

But Pinkie didn't hear it she had already bounced across the room and grabbed the other two girls by the hand and pulled them along to the seventh floor.

Daphne rolled her eyes but didn't say anything letting herself be pulled along.

xxx

Barnebas the Barmy was trying to teach his troll friends Stephen and Barnwicky some proper technique but it was slow going. Didn't they realize that they could be much more graceful if they showed the world some real pizzazz?

"I would appreciate it if you put some more effort in your cabriole Stephen. We're not here to flop around. We're making art here!"

Stephen for his part was not amused at Barnebass' criticism and told him so. They were doing their best after all.

"Snort grunk sniffle? Sniffle sniffle snort..."

"Not with that attitude you won't!"

Barnwicky heard enough and clocked Barnebas over the head with his trusty club in good nature. It was a love pat really.

Barnebass rubbed his dome. Realizing that he may have pushed a little to hard today. He was about to apologize when he heard footsteps around the corner.

"Quick everyone get into character!" He shouted.

xxx

The girls followed the elf's instructions and rounded the corner. The room was supposed to be somewhere around here. They started to touch the walls looking for clues when they encountered the painting they were searching for.

"Excuse me, is one of you Barnebas?" Tactfully omitting the 'the Barmy' moniker Daphne asked the painting.

"Indeed I am." Barnebas said hoping for some interaction with three dimensional people.

"Great thanks!"

"Yeah it should be that wall." She pointed the wall out to the other girls.

Barnebas looked a little forlorn. Barnwicky patted him on the back with a little bit more force then usual. A tradition at this point.

Pinkie walked in front of the wall pondering about music, instruments, musical instruments, a place to practice and have fun.

Like clockwork the stonework shifted and rumbled to reveal an ornate looking door with a little musical note in a gold plaque at it's centre.

Daphne was grinning, music lessons were always her favourite at home.

Without much ado Millicent kicked in the door.

The girls looked excitedly on the rows upon rows of musical instruments. Daphne's eyes roamed and landed upon the beautiful white grand piano by Stoneroad and Daughters.

She played some keys and immediately fell in love. It...She sounded perfectly in tune and the notes had a lyrical quality that the standing piano at home simply didn't have. She knew she just had to come back here in secret. Just to get better acquainted with Ophelia. Daphne sat down and touched the keys some more.

xxx

Pinkie meanwhile was walking along the rows just marvelling at it's treasure. The shear volume of it all beggars belief. She didn't even know that there were so many different instruments in the world let alone in one place. She grabbed a small flute looking thing and gave it a blow.

"Peep!"

No, no, no. She wasn't look for peep.

It was time to experiment.

xxx

There was one who didn't have as much fun. Millicent was rather bored. The room was great and all but for someone who wasn't as musical inclined it got boring quick. Though the amount of magic in the air was interesting.

She idly wondered how the room came to be and as she did so she waddled her way into a big drum looking thing with some brass disks on top causing her to trip.

"Stupid drum!"

She grabbed a wooden stick with a fluff ball on top and hit the drum with it.

"POOM!"

"..."

"POOM POOM"

Millicent giggled like a maniac. She grabbed the big drum and put the strap around her neck allowing her to carry the heavy thing. On the shelf she found one of those round things that had a lot of brass things in it.

...The fun had been doubled!

xxx

The sound of an accordion blasted through the music room startling Daphne out of her muse. She closed the piano and petted Ophelia on her cute lid.

"I've found one!" She heard from a distance. "It's got buttons on it!"

Pinkie came running from the rows with an admittedly beautiful accordion in tow.

"I believe they're called keys." Daphne informed Pinkie. "Aren't you supposed to know that? I thought you knew how to play."

"Of course I know how to play silly… O you meant the accordion." She looked thoughtful for a second. "Never played it in my life."

"What?! Our whole plan hinges on it!"

"Don't worry my part is easy I'll just,...-"

"..."

poom tss, poom tss, POOM TSS, POOM TSS, POOM TSS, POOM TSS, POOM TSS, POOM TSS, poom tss, poom tss.

"..."

Daphne and Pinkie both gawked at Millicent walking by completely in her own world merrily beating the drum and tambourine.

"...I don't think I've ever seen her that happy before." Daphne mumbled. She wanted to shout some more at Pinkie but knew it would be counter productive. So she sighed instead.

"Right I'll find something a little more portable then. Why don't you go practice that accordion?"

"Oki doki!" Pinkie gave her a salute and grabbed her new toy with vigour. "Let's rock baby!"

xxx

Any instrument was hard to learn. Daphne knew this well. She was taught from an early age because it took a lifetime to master the piano. Though she dabbled with the violin she also practised the guitar in secret. Her parents would never approve of such a rustic instrument but Daphne just loved music so much that it was hard to resist.

It was all for the family she told herself. In the future it would help in finding a prospective husband and perhaps it would be useful in charming future business associates. Music was a weapon in a woman's arsenal after all. It was best to be well armed.

A guitar caught her eye on a shelf a little ways away. It was an acoustic guitar with a very elegant design. She strummed the strings and found a warm tone reaching her ear.

This was the one.

xxx

When she returned she found Pinkie playing with her accordion on a weird muggle device. Her mouth fell open.

"Hi Daphne! I found a unicycle. Think we should use it?"

There were so many questions running through her mind that it was hard to pinpoint one and ask it. She was about to make her choice when she got distracted by something else.

poom tss, poom tss, POOM TSS, POOM TSS, POOM TSS, POOM TSS.

"..."

Millicent had arrived. She was smirking at them "It's really jolly good fun this. I get to hit things and nobody can complain."

And on that bombshell it was time to go to work and start practising.

xxx

The amount of progress they made came as a surprise to Daphne. Even though they were only practising one piece of music and an incredibly easy one at that. The quickness with which they learned it was impressive.

She had to begrudgingly admit that Pinkie had a real talent for showmanship. Even though her bit was simplistic she made it look like a real act.

It got her quite excited.

If they kept this up they could put the plan in motion by tonight…

xxx

Millicent never had so much fun in her entire life! It felt like she finally found a place where she could just unleash her...well she didn't know what exactly but unleash something. She was allowed to hit things and nobody cared. Ha! That was the best bit for sure. Her friends were very encouraging and… Friends? When did that happen? ...Who cares!

Poom Tss, Poom Tss, Poom Tss.

xxx

The horses were enjoying it! Pinkie could tell. It was very subtle and a little bit… strange actually, to have them sing along. She started playing the accordion with even more bombast to try and see if they would go along with it. She was starting to think that the horses weren't that scary at all.

Until one tried to bellow loudly along. That was a little bit scary.

Perhaps Dumbledore was right? Perhaps it would all even itself out. Pinkie felt hopeful.

xxx

The dining hall was starting to get packed with students waiting to get their munch on. Fred and George were goofing off trying to impress Angelina and Katie with some silly joke items they cooked up somewhere. They were mildly successful. The old Weasley charm was working wonders or so they believed but honestly the girls had seen better.

Suddenly, from beyond the dining halls, sounds could be heard. They didn't know what it was. Drumbeats maybe? It got the attention of everyone.

A trio of Slytherin firsties with Weasley red hair came barrelling through the halls with a musical fanfare that conjured a smile on everyone sitting at the tables.

The hall grew silent as they played something that sounded like polka music while moving between tables gathering stares as they went.

Some people started to clap along when they suddenly stopped in front of the Weasley twins.

The silence was profound.

"You!" Pinkie sang. "Play your pranks...like a troll... plays with snot."

Fred nostrils grew four sizes making him look distinctly troll like.

"EY!" Millicent shouted.

Daphne jumped in with her guitar "And you gasconade... like a bitch... like a lot." As poor George sprouted two fluffy dog ears.

"And you... always squeak... always speak… acoustically." Fred could feel his vocal cords raise an octave.

Daphne and Pinkie started singing in harmony. "You should know… that we won't leave it be-he-he!"

"Cause you're hot and you're cold!"

"You're yes and you're no!"

"You're in and you're out!"

"You're up and you're down!"

The spells were following one another in rapid succession now. It was getting harder and harder to recognize the Weasley twins as they slowly transformed in curious ways, one sprouting icicles where the other shot steam out if his ears and so on.

"You're wrong and we're right!"

"It's black and it's white!"

"You look like a crup!"

"Here, wear some make up!"

"This is how you pay, hey!"

Millicent recognized her bit. "FUCK YOU!" She shouted.

"You don't give a bad hair day!"

xxx

The song went from verse to verse changing the Weasley twins appearance in a number of monstrous ways. When the song ended and the hall finished their applause Pinkie had something to say to the Weasley twins...

From out of nowhere she pulled two rubber chickens and pointed them at each of the thoroughly hexed boys. The war paint under her eyes arrived in an equally mysterious fashion giving her a slightly mad look.

"Let it go. Or we'll give you a war you won't believe. Let it go…"

The twins swallowed audibly and nodded.

Pinkie squeezed the two chickens and dropped them on the ground filling the stunned hall with a loud, ominous and oddly comical 'Whaaaah' noise.

Pinkie was staring crazily at the twins when Millicent picked up the tempo.

"ONE TWO THREE FOUR!"

The sound of loud polka music filled the Hogwarts halls once more and three girls fanfared their way back to their music room leaving the sound of laughter in their wake. Even Fred and George when they got a good look at each other couldn't stop their laughing. They were got good.

xxx

Meanwhile if the Slytherins were paying attention to the big hourglasses in the entrance hall they would have noticed the Slytherin house hourglass was displaying some odd behaviour.

"Ten points from Slytherin." Professor McGonagall shouted. "For hexing in the dining halls."

Professor Snape looked furious. "Twenty points to Slytherin for livening up the place."

"I beg your pardon Professor Snape do you seek to undermine my authority?"

"Hardly, deputy headmistress I merely wished to reward my students for their… youthful exuberance."

"Ten points will be removed from Slytherin house for bullying behaviour!" Professor McGonagall moved to make herself look intimidating but professor Snape rewarded that with a sneer.

"Twenty points to Slytherin for shear musical genius."

"We cannot condone this Severus!"

"Why are those twins still in this school then Minerva?!"

They went back and forth for a long time with poor Albus caught in the middle holding his head in his hands just trying to get an evening meal. The students meanwhile were laughing up a storm at the dinner show they got presented with.

xxx

"Whahaha did you see the look on their faces?" Millicent looked positively manic. "They were genuinely afraid. No one can stop us now!" She stared at her own hands like she discovered some sort of super power.

Archibald petted her on her head. "Easy there Maleficent. Wouldn't want to scare the children." He indicated the others.

Pinkie and Daphne stared at Millicent like she was possessed.

Daphne rolled her eyes. "Everyone in this school has gone completely barmy." She snootily raised her head "Well this was… something. I'm going to see what my friends are up to." She left the others alone as she made her way towards the common room.

"Thanks Archy." Pinkie gave him a hug. "We couldn't have done it without your help."

Archibald smiled. "Gekkehuis. I'll see you girls later ja?" He waved at them as he went down the stairs as well.

Feeling a little slow and tired Millicent and Pinkie both trudged their way back towards the kitchens. Millicent was staring at Pinkie, like she was a complicated arithmancy problem.

"You know… You're weird." She said almost in thought.

"I am?"

"Yeah. It's like you're… different somehow. Like your magic is weird, you do weird things, and the elves are weird around you. You're just weird."

"Weird bad?"

"Hmm… no? I don't think so. I mean at least you're honest. What you see is what you get. It's a different story with the others. They're all just pretending. Pretending to be civil, pretending to be nice, pretending... that they like me."

Millicent stopped to look outside a nearby window. She was fumbling with her hands. The view was really spectacular with the sun going down over the forbidden forest. Pinkie didn't see it. She looked at Millicent instead.

"I'm sorry for hitting you and calling you names the other day. I just… I just didn't like that you were so happy and I wasn't."

"Truth is... of all the stupid faces in this school, yours is the one I want to punch the least."

"Aw, thanks Milly."

Millicent snorted at Pinkie's awkward timing.

"You're welcome."

"..."

"Fiends?"

"Friends."

Author's Note

Only with less Russian dudes and more British girls.

Chapter 11: Owlicious' first job

With her head in her hand and doodling with her pencil. Gracie was trying to do her homework. The sun was going down and it was almost time for dinner.

“Why is homework so boring?” She thought idly, looking at Rodger her newt.

Rodger had gotten his own little terrarium and was currently sunbathing on his favourite log.

Gracie was contemplating letting him loose in her room when she heard a loud smack against her window.

Turning around she saw an owl slowly sliding down the glass pane.

Having read the folders about the magical world she assumed that this was probably one of those post owls.

Feeling a bit bad for the poor thing she moved to open the window and scrape him of.

The owl looked tired as he flapped his way in to her room. She recognised it as Owlicious. Pinkie's post owl!

Owlicious presented his leg to Gracie which had a small tube attached.

Gracie didn't relieve him of his burden though. Instead she let him hop on her hand and placed him on her shoulder.

“Let's find you some treats first. You've earned it!”

“Hoot.” Owlicious agreed. He did earn it.

With owl on her shoulder Gracie zipped down the railing of the stairs and landed nimbly on her feet and hurried into the kitchen where Maddie was currently working on dinner.

“Look Maddie, Pinkie sent us something!”

“Hoot!” Owlicious spread his wings in what he thought was an impressive manner. He presented the little tube to Maddie.

Maddie untied the little thing and gave the owl some bacon bits. The leftovers from breakfast this morning.

“Why don't you go get everyone Gracie?”

She hadn't finished speaking yet or Gracie ran towards the stairs.

“FOOD'S READY!” She bellowed in the stairwell.

A low rumble shuddered the foundations of the little orphanage as feet both small and large thundered their way downstairs.

Gracie jumped out of the way just in time for the stampede to move past.

She sighed a small sigh and made her way back to the kitchen where a bunch of children were eagerly waiting the nights scrumptious dinner: Cooked pears, sweet meats and potatoes.

Maddie put a big pan on the table and smacked away greedy little hands with a wooden spoon.

“Has everybody washed their hands?”

Some of the younger children grumbled, left the table and started faffing about at the sink. A competition arose about who washed their hands the fastest.

When everybody had found his or her seats again the feast could begin.

The older children would help the youngest ones learn how to use their utensils and they made sure that everyone got their fill. Still, no pear was spared the vicious onslaught of hungry little mouths and the big pot was soon very empty.

Pleasant conversations started around the table. Gracie asked Nico to help with her homework and he begrudgingly obliged.

“Yay score for Gracie.” She thought. She started to wonder if there was going to be desert when suddenly Owlicious descended from the high cupboard to the surprise of many.

“HOOT!”

She landed right in front of Maddie, picked up the little tube with his beak and dropped it in her lap.

“HOOT HOOT!”

“Oh, right.” She went and grabbed the little cylinder. “Everyone. Pinkie send us a letter!”

Maddie uncorked the little tube and with a loud ‘poof’ The entire room was filled with quite frankly an overabundance of confetti. The children tried grabbing it out of the air but just like snow it seemed to melt away and disappear when touched.

The tube held more surprises though as with a little shake from Maddie big boxes of Birtie Botts Every Flavour Beans, butterbear bottles and of course Pinkies home made cupcakes came tumbling out. Honestly this seemed quite a lot of space warping even for Pinkie Pie.

Almost as an afterthought a few pieces of paper floated out as well which got deftly caught by Maddie before even touching the table.

“Who would like to read Pinkies letter?”

A few hands rose up around the table.

“Okay, so we have three papers here. Why don’t you… Gracie, Iris and Ricky. Why don’t you read it to us?”

She walked around the table and gave each of the children there piece of paper.

“Iris? You’re up first.”

Some of the children groaned. Iris wasn’t very good at reading. But a harsh look from Maddie stopped the groaning right smartly.

“Go on Iris.”

Iris put her finger on the piece of paper and started her attempt at making the words come out right.

“Hi… ev...ev...”

“Everybody.”

xxx

Hi everybody!

Zowie, I should have written sooner but life here at Hogwarts sure is hectic.

Learning magic is really hard! Especially all the wand stuff. It requires a lot of concentration which is hard to do when you keep thinking about new cupcake ideas. (Taste the new butterbear/pumpkin spice flavoured ones I sent along.)

Luckily I've made some new friends who help me a lot! There's Hermione and Harry who are in Gryffindor so I don't see them very often but they're the best! Ron who is their friend doesn't like me very much though. He says it's because I'm in Slytherin but I don't get it really.

Speaking of Slytherin, our common room is underneath a lake! How cool is that! My roomy is Millicent Bullstrode. She's great because I think she wants to be real hard but instead she's just a cute softie. Just like Sophie.

xxx

The youngsters had a good laugh about that one.

“Hey! I'm no $%@& softie!”

Alfie who was sucking his thumb drowsily petted her on the back in what he hoped was a reassuring manner.

“Don't worry, I think you're scary sometimes.”

Sophie groaned, slumped on the table and waved her hand to continue the letter.

xxx

Honestly so much has happened these past weeks I don't really know where to begin. I suppose I could tell you about today... You wanna here about today?

It was our first flying lesson. On brooms like real witches in the storybooks and boy let me tell you; this day was a doozy!

xxx

There was a nice breeze blowing over the Quidditch pitch as the first year Gryffindor and Slytherin contingent had themselves lined up in two lines as Madam Hooch had instructed.

Brooms were placed alongside each student in preparation for the upcoming lesson.

Madam Hooch had just finished her lecture about safety and instructed the children to step next to their brooms and say 'up'.

Pinkie watched as the other students went to work. Hermione's broom just wiggled around a bit while Ron's broom smacked him in the face. The brooms of Harry and Draco jumped into their waiting hands eagerly.

“Up!” said Pinkie. And the all the brooms within hearing distance leapt out of their owners hands and flew towards her. The brooms thumped her in the face with their eagerness and knocked Pinkie over.

Pansy, Draco and Ron started laughing but stopped abruptly when they noticed the reaction of their opposite.

The brooms were all still vying for Pinkies attention as she slowly crawled back on her feet. She grabbed one at random and hoped that the others would leave her alone.

Madam Hooch came to investigate what all this brouhaha was about and found those brooms to be behaving oddly.

The school brooms were never very good but it's possible that another year's worth of neglect had finely made them loopy.

She noticed they were vying for the attentions of a girl that looked rather uncomfortable with all their antics so she gave them a stern look and the brooms slowly floated back to the other children.

“Now then! Mount your broom and when I give the signal I want you to kick off of the ground hard. Hover for a few seconds then land pointing the tip of your broom downward.”

Madam Hooch put the whistle in her mouth and gave it a short tweet.

Before anyone could even start floating, Neville happened. He started flying though he did not seem to be enjoying it overmuch.

Either his broom decided on going on it's own merry adventure, or maybe Neville's own wanton movements caused the lift, or maybe it was a combination of both but whatever the reason Neville certainly did not enjoy what came next.

He crashed into a tower, then a metal thing, then the tower again, only to be knocked of his broom and be caught dangling from a torch sconce. Gravity decided that that was enough tomfoolery for one day and decided to tear poor Neville's robe apart just to have him back on terra firma.

Terra firma he did meet with a thud and a crack. Madam Hooch quickly ran up to him.

She sighed in relief when he came away from that bit of foolishness with nothing else then a broken wrist.

Gently she helped Neville on his feet. “Let's have madam Pomfrey have a look at you. Just to make sure that a broken wrist is the extent of your injuries mister Longbottom.”

The group of firsties finally caught up with Madam Hooch.

“As for you lot. If I see a single broom in the air you'll be out of Hogwarts before you can say Quidditch.”

Pinkie didn't want to leave Hogwarts so she decided to keep her feet firmly on the ground. Draco and Harry on the other end had other ideas.

Draco grabbed a little ball that Neville had dropped and decided to taunt Harry with it. Flying on his broom and trying to lure Harry into a conflict of some sort.

Pinkie didn't really get it. Maybe it was a Gryffindor Slytherin thing but things quickly escalated when Draco threw the little ball away.

Harry did not hesitate and zoofed away faster then you would believe on his rickety school broom. He made it just in time to catch the little ball right in front of professor McGonagall's study.

She saw the whole thing...

But Harry didn't notice as he casually glided down to his friends.

Everyone was really impressed with his flying, Pinkie included. He made it look easy and she couldn't wait to give it a go herself.

She would have to wait though because just then professor McGonagall arrived on the scene.

Her expression was unreadable as she requested mister Potters presence.

Harry looked a bit scared as the crowd parted way to let him through.

“Follow me.”

xxx

And we never saw Harry again...

Ha, that was a joke.

What happened instead was they made him the Gryffindor seeker for the house team. I'm not really certain if he should be happy about that. Quidditch has some weird rules. Did you know that first aid is not allowed unless the injury is life threatening? You have to fly with a bludgered liver if the injury isn't serious enough.

Supposedly to build character.

This lead to odd situations like that of Kendrick McGinty who hit himself in the head with his beater bat just so that he could get a small cut above his eyebrow healed which was bleeding into his eyes.

The wizarding world sure is loco in the coco sometimes...

Anyway,

xxx

Madam Hooch's hawk eyes quickly noticed that her group of firsties was lacking in number.

“Where is mister Potter?”

Hermione spoke, always eager to answer questions. “Professor McGonagall took him away.”

“Why?”

“She didn't say.”

“Didn't she?... Oh well, let's get on with it.”

Everyone stepped on their brooms once more and at the sound of the whistle everyone floated nice and behaved for a couple of seconds to then touch down again.

“Good.” Madam Hooch said as she surveyed the group. She noticed Hermione was holding her broom wrong and corrected her hand position.

Pansy started snickering but was quickly silenced because she had her hands wrong as well.

Pinkie thought that the whole thing was rather easy actually. The broom behaved exactly like she imagined a broom to behave when you imagine yourself flying on one.

Madam Hooch instructed the same exercise three more times to make absolutely sure everyone got it right. Then she started to explain how to properly land.

It was all very technical and Pinkies concentration started to waver. Unbidden thoughts started to enter her mind.

...Rainbows were nice things... Would butterbeer make a good cupcake flavour?... Do the stars dream?... Picklebarreljuice is a funny word...Hmm.

Unbeknownst to Pinkie, Madam Hooch had finished her explanation.

“Now, kick off!” She shouted and whistled sharply.

Pinkie was startled out of her reverie and kicked the ground a bit too hard.

“Buttered-rainbow-star-dream-pickle!” She squawked as she did a somersault and had enough speed leftover to shoot strait into the sky.

Whatever she was supposed to do during this exercise she was pretty sure this wasn't it.

“WHA-HEEEEEE!”

Screaming seemed like the right thing to do as she quickly cleared the castle.

She gave a yank on her broomstick and was now flying upside down over the astronomy tower.

“Wait a second.”

She gave another yank and was now speeding toward the ground again. Fast.

“Wait one finger licking second.”

She yanked her broom towards the forbidden forest.

“This.”

“Is.”

“Awesome!”

xxx

Blaise, Pansy and Daphne were hovering as they looked on.

Madam Hooch was trying to catch Pinkie but it seemed that she had finally fully cracked because she seemed to think that she was in some sort of race.

“You know, that was the best buttered-rainbow-star-dream-pickle I've ever seen.”

“That's not a thing Blaise.” Daphne informed him.

“I dunno... There was the arc and then the straight shot towards the astronomy tower. It looked like it was a thing.”

Pansy was getting antsy from sitting still on a piece of wood 50 feet of the ground. “Oh whatever.” She said with annoyance trying to turn her broom. "It's not like it matters."

Suddenly she heard something crack within the bristles.

“Uhm, guys? ...I think I broke my stirring twigs.”

xxx

“Whee!”

Pinkie was doing barrel rolls, aileron rolls and sweet rolls but it didn't feel nearly roly enough. She was trying to push herself. What she was trying to achieve she couldn't really explain. More speed maybe?

“Miss Pie! You will land this instant!”

Pinkie turned around and found madam Hooch right on her tail looking particularly angry.

It was a bit of a startling realisation. She was lost in her own little world for a second there.

“Okay madam Hooch.”

Pinkie speed didn't reduce in any way shape or form.

“...”

“I'm waiting.”

Slowly Pinkie turned around on her broom to face madam Hooch with a bit of a forced grin on her face.

“I don't know how to brake.”

With a clear amount of exasperation and using small words madam Hooch explained how to do it.

Nevertheless Pinkie still manage to crash in a spectacular way. What with creating a new ditch in Hagrids pumpkin patch. Hagrid was not pleased.

Neither was madam Hooch.

“Detention miss Pie, for this reckless display! You will serve your detention with your head of house and I will make sure professor Snape is fully aware of what you've done!”

xxx

And that's how I got my very first detention. Well in Hogwarts anyway. I'm sure we all remember the incident with the hamster and the food colouring...

Poor mister Bigglesworth... Blue was not his colour.

Moving right along.

xxx

Madam Hooch was basically dragging Pinkie towards the Slytherin dungeons.

It seemed a bit unnecessary since Pinkie knew the way and knew how to walk. But some people just liked be in charge she supposed.

Her knock was brisk and Snape's reply was as well.

“Enter.”

With a zeal for proper broom safety she exulted on Pinkies escapades. Explaining how she did a buttered-rainbow-star-dream-pickle without even knowing how to brake.

Snape turned his gaze towards Pinkie slowly. “I'll make sure she is properly... taken care of.”

“Thank you professor.” Madam Hooch left the dungeon with one last disappointed look towards Pinkie.

Honestly that one hurt the worst.

“Follow me.”

They entered an abandoned classroom without much fanfare. Normally Pinkie would sit behind the teachers desk as a joke but something told her that that would be a bad idea right now. So she sat behind the small desk in the front.

Professor Snape didn't sit. Instead he looked out the window into the green waters of the great lake.

“You will do lines.” He waved his wand and some writing utensils appeared in front her.

“What should I write?”

“Whatever will make you stop displaying such foolish behaviour.”

“Oki-doki-loki!”

She started on her work and professor Snape returned to his desk and started to grade some potion assignments.

They worked together like that for several minutes until Snape suddenly spoke up.

“I've had an... interesting conversation with professor McGonagall just moments before.”

“Oh really?”

“Yes. Apparently that Potter boy... is the new Gryffindor seeker.”

“Harry got the seeker position? That's great! He'll be so happy.”

“...Yes.” Snape looked like he swallowed a bug. “Be that as it may our own seeker is leaving school this year. We would be in need of a replacement come spring.”

“Hm.” Was Pinkies thoughtful reply.

The silence got filled with the scratches and scribbles of a quill on parchment as Pinkie continued with her lines.

Snape sighed. “It was implied that you would take up this position.”

“Really? Don't I get a say in it?”

Snape'e expression turned sour. “I suppose if you must.”

Now Pinkie was relatively new to Slytherin's ways but even she recognised an opportunity.

“I've heard that this sport is really quite dangerous. What's in it for little old Pinkie Pie?”

“You mean besides that you would be the envy of our entire house and that you would get all the privileges that members of the team enjoy?”

“I don't think I want to be the envy of the house. People are mean enough as it is.”

Pinkie thought she saw professor Snape glaring angrily for a second. But maybe she had imagined it.

He decided on a different tactic.

“Your grades aren't exactly...stellar.”

“My potions grade is Outstanding!”

“And nothing else is... You know the rules of Slytherin house.”

“Yeah... Just for reference. What does happen if your grades aren't up to snuff?”

Professor Snape's grin was eerily jubilant. “Something deeply ...unpleasant.”

“Yikes.”

“We've held that cup for six years I aim to have it for a seventh. Not that I care for that silly game. I just want to beat those vapid Gryffindors.”

“Oh?”

“To be the new seeker is hard work. There will be a lot of demands on your time. Naturally we would have look the other way with regards to your marks, nobody's perfect after all.”

Truth was that Pinkie was actually rather excited about becoming a seeker. It meant more flying and flying was fun. She didn't own a broom and the school brooms were heavily regulated. So this was really the only way.

“Well professor, I guess I have no choice.”

She shook Snape's hand happily with both hands.

“You drive a hard bargain mister!”

Professor Snape was a little bit disgruntled by Pinkie's quick turn around. He started to wonder if he perhaps had made a mistake... Did this airheaded dunderbrain just play him?

He highly doubted it.

“You may leave.”

Pinkie skipped out of the classroom with a smile on her face.

When Severus later looked at her lines out of boredom he found one-hundred instances of 'Professor Snape will be sad if I display foolish behaviour.'

He stared out of the window for a while after that.

xxx

And that's how I came to be the new reserve seeker for the Slytherin house team. I'll have my first practise soon. Wish me luck! Bye!

Author's Note

Chapter 12: Halloween!

Pinkie and Millicent were sneaking their way towards the music room. It was a little late and tomorrow it would be Halloween or Samhain as Milly liked to call it.

Pinkie had plans for that day so a little drum session would do Milly some good to mellow her out.

They arrived at the painting of Barnebas to find the door with the musical note already present. Pinkie and Millicent looked at each other and decided wordlessly to try and sneak in.

When Pinkie tried to open the door however she got yanked inward only to stumble upon non other then Daphne Greengrass.

Pinkie giggled “Sneak hug attack!”

Daphne did not reciprocate.

“Get of me.” She said stoically.

Pinkie laughed awkwardly as she got up “Sorry.”

Still it was Daphne that looked like she did something wrong. She had the look of someone who got caught.

“Sooo...” Pinkie was fishing. “What 're you up to?”

“Nothing.” She said maybe a bit to fast.

“Nothing huh.” Millicent was circling around Daphne like a bloodhound. “Then what is this?!” She grabbed some papers that were poking outside Daphne's robe.

“Nothing! Just some papers. Give em back!”

Millicent ran away giggling. “Let's see shall we.” She was running away and as she ran she saw what it actually was. “Wait. This is just sheet music.”

Millicent suddenly stopped. “Why are you embarrassed by sheet music?”

“It's muggle.”

“Pourqouis?”

“It's muggle!”

'Chopin nocturne in E flat major op 9 no 2' shone prominently as the title. Millicent was still a little shocked by the revelation and so Daphne was able to yank her papers back.

“And I'd appreciate it if you could keep mum about it.”

“Oh silly, you don't have to be embarrassed about that. I listen to muggle music all the time.” Pinkie tried to be reassuring and put an arm around her shoulder.

Daphne just rolled her eyes and left the music room in a huff.

“Daphne's so odd.” Pinkie observed but Milly just looked at Pinkie like she was a dunce.

“Come on.” She said. “Let's wreck this place.”

xxx

Pinkie had found a really cool wand that would make her voice bubbly which was really funny. She taped it to her face with a bit of spell 'o tape so she could keep her hands free.

The screaming guitar she had found would have to suffer those hands.

Millicent had found a drum kit that looked strong enough to withstand her.

And withstand it it did as Millicent went to town on those poor little drums. Pinkie had never heard anything like it as she hit the drums crazy fast.

It gave Pinkie some serious jumping energy as she was slappin' her guitar and started shouting random thoughts through her bubbly microphone wand thingy.

The energy couldn't be dissipated by just playing the music so she sort of ran around in silly figure eighths.

And wouldn't you know it, that was a bit much for even Pinkies brain to handle so she tripped.

“#$@%” She said through her musical diatribe.

She was laying on her back and continued with renewed vigour and even more aggression that the 'music' let loose inside of her.

She shouted “Get up!” With anger at herself and accidentally threw her guitar into Millicent's drums.

Millicent was stunned into silence. Pinkie was about to ask her if she was alright but then Milly started laughing.

“That was #$@% brilliant!”

Pinkie laughed as well. And with the silence that followed came a moment of Zen and inner peace.

“I sure hope the room can fix all this because I don't know where to start to be honest.”

“Meh, who cares nobody comes here anyway. Let's go before we’re late for curfew.”

xxx

Goodnight Milly.

Goodnight Pinkie.

xxx

“Pinkie Pie! Fill me with the power of darkness!”

“One tripple-dipped double-chocolate gobble-muffin comin' right up.”

Pinkie threw a chocolate muffin over her shoulder with practised ease and Millicent caught the little muffin with her big angry maw. She tore it to pieces with macabre eagerness.

It was Halloween morning and classes were about to start. Millicent was dressed as a vampire, pointy teeth and all and Pinkie was dressed as a witch. She had found a spiffy hat somewhere and had asked Archy to transfigure her nose long and warty. One of the warts even had a few hairs growing out of it.

Honestly Millicent had no idea how Pinkie talked her into this but she had to admit it was fun seeing the different reactions of people.

“Blah!”

She startled a second year Slytherin out of her morning funk when she came down the stairs and laughed.

She got a stinging hex for her troubles but she didn’t care.

xxx

The charms lesson of the day was rather fun. Wingardium Leviosa, the levitation charm. As usual Pinkie had trouble learning the spell but underneath all the toot noises and party whistles she got her feather to wiggle a bit which she was extremely proud of.

Professor Flitwick knew of her concentration issues and commended her on both her spiffy hat and her progress with magic in general.

He was so nice that Pinkie decided to reward him with a lovely little surprise this evening. He was her favourite teacher and she really appreciated the attempts at helping her wand magic shine.

She was sure that he would appreciate it when he’d find it.

Lisa was rather good at charms and she gave Pinkie some pointers on the subject as well since they were pared together again. Lisa was a good friend too. They just didn't have a lot of opportunities to interact.

The taunts from Draco and Pansy had become white noise after all this time. With a good friend by her side it really mattered a lot less when bullies were being mean.

Pinkie was thinking on the last couple of weeks and maybe Blaise was a friend as well. He would sometimes sit with them and have fun with Milly and herself. Then again he also sat with Theo, Draco, Daphne and Pansy.

She should ask him about it at some point. It would be so cool if they were friends!

The lesson ended and there was a little time to waste before the Halloween feast.

Pinkie was going to have to miss the feast because she had a little scavenger hunt planned for the Hogwarts firsties and it needed setting up.

xxx

Oh, what was she going to do? They knew her secret!

Daphne was screaming on the inside though nobody would've thunk it if you'd have seen her.

She didn't get a wink of sleep all night. She had to apply her glamour charms her mother had taught her just to make herself presentable this morning.

Oh why did she answer their questions? Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

'Maybe you wanted to feel that spark again?' A dark part of her psyche cheekily provided for an answer.

'Shut up!' She shouted inside her own head and suppressed the thought with extreme prejudice.

She was sure that Pinkie and Millicent were planning some sort of blackmail scheme even now. Bulstrode in particular was the vindictive type.

She would have to strike first.

Even though she didn't like the thought at all...

xxx

The Halloween feast was in full swing but Pinkie wasn't attending. Normally she would love such an event of course but some things were more important.

Like 'the Spooky Salsa Search of Mystery.' It's what she had called her scavenger hunt.

She was hanging fake bats on strings that would certainly trigger a good jump-scare when she heard something.

The sound of soft sniffles echoed through the empty halls. There was someone crying nearby.

She followed the noise and found a girls toilet that was out of order.

There was someone crying in the stall.

Well that just wouldn't do. Halloween was supposed to be fun not sad.

“Hello? Are you okay?” She knocked on the door.

“Just leave me alone!”

“Oh silly I can't do that. You're really sad and that makes me sad too.”

She fished a cupcake out of her robe specifically baked to perfection in case of sad people.

It's smell was particularly sweet almost cloyingly so. It contained more sugar then was technically possible to fit inside the space that the cupcake was inhabiting and it gave of a strange pink glow when you looked at it sideways.

She slid the little treat underneath the bathroom stall door

“Here, this will make you feel better.”

“...It's probably hexed or something.”

“Hexed to make you feel better.”Pinkie said with a smile and a wink. The stall inhabitant couldn't see it.

Pinkie did see that someone slowly picked up the little cupcake and she heard the hesitant little nibble that followed.

“...This is really good.”

Pinkie heard it said in between sniffles and she felt a little bit of pride.

“Do you want to tell your auntie what happened?”

“No!...yes.”

And so Pinkie heard a sordid tale of friendship, loss and betrayal. How two friends left the other behind because they were fraternising with the enemy.

“Stupid Slytherins.”

Pinkie heard it being mumbled behind the closed door. She put her hand on her waist and huffed.

“Well you're being helped by a Slytherin as we speak so maybe we're not all that bad!”

“What?!”

Pinkie heard the stall being unlocked and Ronald Weasley came tumbling out.

“What are you doing here?”

“I was preparing for my scavenger hunt. Do you wanna join in?”

“I don't thi-”

A loud rumbling crash from outside the room shook the foundations of their toilet

Ron was startled into grabbing Pinkies hand. “W-what was that?”

Pinkie was about to respond when another loud crash echoed through Hogwarts. This one much closer then before.

The silence in the little loo was only broken by Ron's whimpering.

Suddenly the door exploded inward with a wave of wooden shrapnel. A loud roar followed by the troll that supplied it.

The troll was staring at the two children with a confused expression.

It was then that Ron started screaming.

“AAAAHH!”

The startled troll tried to hit Ron with his massive weapon. Almost sluggishly the troll moved his massive arm through the air.

Ron and Pinkie jumped underneath it's legs before the club could connect. The stall behind them imploded in a shower of debris and toilet chunks.

He must have hit something important because the floor started to flood with water very quickly.

The troll seemed distracted by the water so Ron and Pinkie slowly sneaked out of the room.

Only to bump into Hermione and Harry who just rounded the corner.

“Ron?!” Hermione shouted. “Come quick. There's a troll on the loose!”

“I know!”

Pinkie jumped on Ron's back to force him low as another swing from the troll's club missed them by only an inch.

“EEP!” Hermione jumped backwards and stumbled into Harry causing both of them to tumble over.

Harry recovered first. He quickly rolled Hermione of of him and helped her on her feet in one smooth motion. Just in time to see Ron and Pinkie erupt from the toilet exit followed by the troll.

The troll decided on following Ron.

Ron in a panicked state started running in circles. The troll tried to hit him with his club but Ron remained just out of reach the entire time.

Harry tried to distract the troll by shooting sparks at it with his wand and got his wish.

The troll was going for him now.

Hermione tried to do some transfiguration on the nearby pipes. Maybe to try to turn them into something sharp to hurt the troll with.

She ultimately failed miserably though. She was to panicked and in the end she just didn't know enough magic to get it done proper.

Pinkie was looking on all this chaos and just about had it with mister troll.

The troll was about to clobber Harry into a fine paste when Pinkie jumped up on the trolls shoulder and grabbed him by his fur collar. She looked him deep in the eye.

“Listen here mister! Just because you're big and strong doesn't mean you get to be a bully!”

The troll was completely bewildered and not a little bit intimidated by this girl who was standing on his shoulder.

Pinkie shook his fur coat roughly. “You do not get to hurt my friends!”

She got so close their noses were almost touching.

“Well? What do you have to say for yourself?”

The troll was looking at her stupidly and tried to shrug her off only to find Pinkie was not so easily shrugged.

"I said! What do you have to say for yourself!"

It was really hard to look her in the eye and realise that he was dealing with an actual person. He suddenly burst out crying. He sagged onto the floor and thick tears started dribbling down his face in big rivers.

He snorted loudly.

Pinkie tried to rub is back to try and comfort him but it was difficult since he was so large. “There there. It's okay. Why don't you tell me what has made you such a grump today.”

She passed on a little handkerchief that had little flowers with smiley faces on them and the troll blew his nose with a strange honk sound.

“Grunk snort snort.” He said

“Uh huh, uh huh. That wasn't very nice.”

“Grunk sniffle snort sniffle!... Snif snif snort.... Snif snort.”

“Wow. And that all just happened just now?”

“Snurt.”

“Well no wonder you're so cranky. Don't worry, officer Pinkie is on the case!”

She turned around and grabbed the troll by the hand to lead him on.

Only to encounter the shocked faces of professor McGonagall, Flitwick and headmaster Dumbledore.

“Oh, hello everybody.”

Professor Dumbledore was the quickest on the uptake. “Hi Pinkie. Could you enlighten us on what happened?” He asked in a calm grandfatherly tone.

“Sure! Mister Snurt here was preparing for a lovely chicken dinner with his girlfriend miss Snurt. No relation. When suddenly a man in a turban came and stole his food!”

“A turban you say...”

“Yeah. You think professor Quirrel might know who did it? Turban wearing wizards might run in the same circles.”

“Hmm, Perhaps. Might I inquire as to what mister Snurts future plans are?” He did a little bow towards the troll.

“Well, I thought I brought him to the kitchens to have the elves cook a nice chicken for him. And then I would show him the entrance to the forbidden forest.”

Pinkie looked a little sad. “I guess there won't be a Spooky Salsa Search of Mystery tonight... Oh well.”

“Excuse me, a what?”

Pinkie pointed towards Harry who got startled into the bats that she had set just hung moments before.

“A scavenger hunt.”

“I see.”

Mister Snurt was starting to get a little bit antsy at the whole conversation and Pinkie grabbed his hand again to sooth him.

“Come on mister Snurt. Let's find you some chicken.”

“Gronk.”

Pinkie and the troll went around the corner leaving the others feeling mightily confused.

xxx

“See? We told you she was nice.”

Ron, Harry and Hermione were currently in the hospital wing getting checked out by madam Pomfrey.

“Yeah alright. It must've been a fluke or something that got her sorted in Slytherin.”

“Yeah.” Harry said. “Maybe the hat was drunk or something... Can hats get drunk?”

Hermione looked thoughtful “I don't think so. But the hat did look tattered. We could ask the headmaster sometime if we can patch it up? Or at least give it a good cleaning.”

Harry nodded and turned to Ron. “In the meantime I think you should apologise to Pinkie. She did save you.”

“Fine. I'll admit she's not evil... Can we be friends again now?”

Hermione grabbed them into a hug. “Oh alright. But only because you were hiding in the girls toilet and now we can take the mickey out of you.” She smiled.

Ron looked unfazed. “The only place they would never think to look.”

xxx

After tonight's debacle it was obvious that the intel Gringotts provided was accurate. That ditsy scatterbrain was playing a part and hiding a devious mind.

Not to mention that mysterious power... How did she control that troll?

She had not only found out Voldemort's spy. She used his own plots against him to have him removed. Dumbledore had to act now.

Flitwick was grateful that his own mission remained undiscovered. He poured himself a snifter of goblin wine and sighed.

It had proven difficult to find any usable information. All covert attempts had proven ineffective for some reason or another even with the extra resources the goblin nation was providing.

No, after tonight Flitwick knew that these evasions were no mere flukes.

He sat behind his desk and started on his duties to keep his cover intact when a little card tumbled out of his book.

xxx

My spells are quite tragic
But Flitwick pulls me through
I like to throw parties
And the next one' s for you!

-P

xxx

Some party poppers exploded over Flitwicks head. Streamers and confetti slowly floated downwards.

At first he was confused but then dread filled his stomach and cold sweat flowed down Flitwick's back.

“No!” He shouted. “NO!”

He threw the book and the stack of student assignments on the floor. Only to have a friendly looking pink cake appear where they once were.

I'll always treasure your attempts. It said in a loopy script.

“HOW DID SHE KNOW!” He bellowed in impotent rage. He had covered all his bases. There shouldn't be any leads, so how?

It was possible that he was being plied for information this entire year.

“Oh, Fillius you're such a fool.”

No doubt this night was orchestrated to remove both spies at the same time.

He supposed it didn't matter now. He needed to run. The headhunters will be coming for him once they learn of this catastrophic failure.

Hastily he started packing his things into a small bag that was bigger on the inside. Maybe he had enough time to-

A friendly knock on the door startled him out of his musings. Hastily he placed the bag behind his desk.

“Who is it?” He tried to sound calm but knew he was failing.

“It's me, Fillius.”

Flitwick recognised the voice of Dumbledore and knew he was caught. Pinkie and Albus. A one-two punch.

“...Come in.” He answered with resignation. He hoped that whatever came next he would at least be left with some dignity.

Albus noticed the streamers and the cake on the table. He smiled gently.

“I do believe I have caught you red-handed.”

Fillius put his hands on the table as a sign of surrender. “Indeed.”

Albus was still smiling. “Do not worry my old friend.”

Fillius kept a wary gaze on Dumbledore as he conjured a chair and sat opposite his charms professor. He conjured a tea set in his hand as well and lazily started stirring his tea.

Flitwick hated that these little intimidation tactics were having an effect on him but he tried very hard not to show it.

“I'm sure you realise the problem we are facing at this junction.”

“It is rather obvious.”

Dumbledore blew on his tea. “And how do you propose we solve this dilemma?”

Desperately Flitwick was stalling for time. “I believe you know my answer to that.”

Dumbledore got very contemplative. “Yes I do. I sometimes wish there was another way.”

“I wish that too.”

“Truly? I thought you would revel in the sport.”

Flitwick harrumphed. “Sport yes. But I know when I'm outmatched.”

“Hm?” Dumbledore smiled one of his little smiles. An odd silence fell between them.

“Aren't you going to eat that?” He moved his head to indicate the cake. “The work of miss Pie if I'm not mistaken.”

So was this what it was going to boil down to? Mind control?

“I'd really rather not. Too sweet for my tastes.”

Dumbledore actually laughed. “Oh come now Fillius. I know that goblins aren't particularly fond of such things but this obviously had a lot of work put into it. I insist.”

Flitwick knew that he was well and truly trapped. Fighting Dumbledore openly was suicide. He hoped that his occlumency shields were strong enough to withstand the coming onslaught.

He hesitantly took a small bite.

He chewed.

He swallowed.

And for the first time in is life Fillius Flitwick, AKA Death's Knife, AKA The Demon of the Pits... Felt a little warm and fuzzy inside.

Tentatively he took another bite. Then another one.

He could tell that his faculties were fine. Nothing in his mind was being attacked. There were no potions that were messing with his mood. He would know he had trained for them all.

It just tasted so indescribably good.

Everything had changed. Suddenly money, power even his skills and training seemed so... silly.

Dumbledore conjured himself a fork. “You don't mind if I have a little nibble as well do you? That looks splendidly delicious.”

Flitwick offered him the cake and started laughing uproariously. Just the image of them, the two most powerful wizards in the castle, gorging themselves on a little pink cake.... seemed so utterly ridiculous.

“I must admit. This cake was quite the surprise.”

“I remember the first time I sampled miss Pie's baking. That girl really has a gift.”

That just set Flitwick of again and this time he almost couldn't stop laughing.

“Yeah I guess you could say that. Who would've thought that the way to an old goblin's heart was neither gold, nor a sword or even a wand but a little pink cake.”

Dumbledore started laughing as well. “If we but knew this sooner who knows how many goblin wars could've been prevented.”

They were both laughing so hard now that they both actually had tears running down there faces.

Still a strange contemplative silence filled the room once all the laughter had faded.

Dumbledore's face slowly morphed into something serious.

“I trust I can count on your support with the Quirrel situation. I'm sure that together with Minerva and Severus we can handle it.”

Flitwick stared at Albus for a long time and nodded.

“Good. Then let us not dally.”

They got their wands out and headed for the third floor.

Author's Note

If you're wondering what the music in the room of requirement sounded like.

Is a good estimation

Chapter 13: The Trials of Millicent Bullstrode

It was the morning after Halloween and Pinkie was munching merrily on her buttered toast. Mister Snurt turned out to be really nice once you got to know him and miss Snurt sure did love that chicken.

Even though she didn't do the scavenger hunt in the end. It was an exciting night anyway. And that's worth something too.

She was about to make a grab for the marmalade when Milly entered looking mighty cross.

“And where were you last night?!”

“Uhm, there was a troll...”

Milly crossed her arms and narrowed her eyes.

“I know there was a troll everybody was hiding out from it. Where were you?”

“With the troll. I-”

“Yeah right. What did you do? Bake it a cake? Threw a little party? Maybe gave it a foot massage?”

“No, just gave him some chicken. His name is mister Snu-”

“Save it Pinkie I don't wanna hear it! I thought you were different.”

With a disappointed scowl Milly grabbed some food from the table and stormed out of the great hall.

What was that all about?

Pinkie wanted to pursue but headmaster Dumbledore stood from his seat and cleared his throat demanding the attention of the people present.

Pinkie noticed that he was sporting a mighty shiner on his left eye and he looked a little tired. Professor Flitwicks arm was in a sling as well.

“Good morning everyone. I would like to start the day by making a few announcements of some import.”

The student body noticed the injuries as well and started paying attention. Especially since those kind of injuries could be easily healed.

“First of all, for her assistance in supplying a hungry troll with some nourishment and helping him find his way back home. I would like to award Pinkamena Pie fifty points.”

All the people present in the hall looked at her with a bit more respect but Pinkie didn't notice. She was staring towards the exit anxious to talk to Millicent.

“On to less happy news. It weighs on me to have to announce that professor Quirrel has decided to leave Hogwarts quoting personal reasons.”

There was a lot of confusion on the faces of students. No doubt there were a lot of questions.

“I'm sure we're all sad to see him go.”

The headmaster shook his head and sighed.

“In the interim the position of defence against the dark arts teacher shall be filled by myself. Please inform any students that are not present at this time.”

Pinkie started wiggling on her chair impatiently and looked to Dumbledore to hurry his speech along.

“If you have any questions you may direct them to your head of house. Thank you that is all.”

Before he even sat down properly Pinkie had already raced out of the great hall.

xxx

Manipulating Draco was easy. Daphne just had to play on his superiority complex and make Pinkie out as the worst kind of blood-traitor. Then Pansy would pick up the slack and keep on needling him that they should really do something to put her in her place.

Crabbe and Goyle would then follow without question as always.

Separating Millicent from her friend was not so easy.

She had to bring out all her tricks to get Millicent to believe that Pinkie was making up stories to get attention.

That she probably didn't organise the Slytherin party and just let the elves do it.

That she would probably lie and tell everyone that she slew the troll herself.

It was hard to tear down friendships like that. But Daphne was good. She got Millicent to believe it.

Now all she had to do was wait.

xxx

Pinkie was rushing towards the Slytherin common room to try and catch Milly before classes started. She stumbled upon Pansy who was snickering with Daphne.

She ignored them and ran towards the dormitories.

Pinkie searched but couldn't find Milly.

Maybe Milly was angry because Pinkie made friends with Gryffindors? Or maybe she was angry because she wanted to meet mister Snurt as well?

It was time to get into some deep thinking about this.

‘Did I forget a promise?’

‘I don’t think so me. I think I'm very thorough about promises.’

‘Hmm. Then what could it be...’

‘Maybe Pinkie sense knows?’

‘Pinkie sense. Status report.’

‘Strange itching above the butt Pinkie.’

‘That's a new one.’

‘...Everyme, I need the Pinkie sense manual stat!’

‘We can do this. We can figure this out Pinkies!’

‘Thanks motivational me!’

‘Here's the manual.’

‘Great!’

xxx

Pinkie was walking contemplatively towards the Slytherin common room.

The halls were abandoned. Everybody had gone to class.

She looked like she was ruminating on the meaning of life and didn't pay a lot of attention to her surroundings.

Suddenly something fell on her head, dizzying her and knocking her over.

“Owie.”

“Owie she says.” When Pinkie looked up from rubbing her head she found Draco looking at her with hatred in his eyes. “What are you five?”

“No I-”

He kicked her hard in the midriff.

“Don't argue with your betters!”

The pain was almost blinding. It felt like something moved that shouldn’t have been and she had trouble catching her breath.

“What’s this?”

Draco was attracted by something shiny hanging around her neck and hunched down to look at it.

“A key? How quaint. The key to your heart maybe?” He spit in her face and yanked the small chain from her neck. “I will give this to someone more suitable.”

xxx

Daphne looked on as they beat on her.

It should have felt like victory but with every dull thud and every scream that followed it... Reality set in.

It didn't.

She felt horrible. Destroying your enemies... Showing no weakness.... These used to be abstract concepts. Things became very clear in that moment.

Pansy was laughing like a hyena and Daphne had a lot of difficulty to keep her shock and disgust of her face.

Draco, Crabbe and Goyle never looked so small to her. Sweaty and gross as they beat on someone helpless.

The realisation that she was no different...

Great Merlin. Had they done something like this before?

Is this what it meant to be pureblood? Was this all that we were?

She felt sick.

It seemed like time slowed down as Draco finally came up to her and Pansy, and suggested they go to class. He gave Pansy a small rainbow coloured necklace and had the gall to pretend like he got it by performing some noble deed. She actually squealed in delight.

“Let’s leave the blood-traitor to it.” He said.

Daphne couldn't help herself and looked back as they left Pinkie behind. She knew that something deep within her had changed and it could never be changed back.

xxx

Her chest hurt with every breath so she could only cry quietly. She tried to get up but her leg hurt really bad and it wouldn’t move right.

“Why...Why did they...?”

Pinkie tried to crawl towards the exit but it seemed so far away.

“Hey!”

She heard someone shouting and running over.

Pinkie instinctively flinched but it turned out it was Blaise Zabini.

“Oh Pinkie...”

“Hey Blaise... Are we friends?”

“Yeah. Yeah of course we are. What happened to you?”

“...I fell down... some stairs.”

Blaise looked around the hall, he felt a strange urge to make sure, but there wasn't a stairwell in sight.

He wrapped her arm over his shoulder and lifted her up on her one good foot.

“Ow.”

“Sorry Pinkie. Come on, let's get you to the hospital wing yeah?”

“… yeah.”

Slowly they hobbled themselves there. Blaise let her quietly cry on his shoulder on the way there. He wished he could do more.

xxx

Millicent was sitting in the first defence class with Dumbledore. Apparently Quirrel got the axe.

This was just fine by her since the man was completely useless. Maybe he could start a new career as a garlic farmer. Merlin knows he smelled like one.

No, Millicent had other things on her mind. Draco and Pansy whispering loudly amongst themselves. They seemed a bit too happy. That was never good news.

Still it wouldn't worry Millicent overmuch if Daphne wasn't sitting so... fidgety as well. There was something very fishy going on.

Maybe she shouldn't have left Pinkie this morning.

Where was she anyway? She's never late.

Millicent supposed it didn't matter. It happened exactly like Daphne said it would. She made up some story about the troll.

...Ugh what about it though? So what if she did. Goofing around with Pinkie was fun. Maybe she shouldn't have been such a hothead.

Why can't people just be honest? This was getting so complicated!

Millicent rubbed her eyes with both hands. She would find Pinkie and see what's what.

xxx

Millicent had looked around half the castle but couldn’t find Pinkie. Her search had left her in the great hall.

Frustration was setting in when she noticed that the Slytherin hourglass had filled up considerably.

Millicent saw a group of older Ravenclaws girls sitting nearby studying. “Hey what happened here?” She pointed at the hourglass.

“Hm?" The girl looked up from her textbook. "Some girl wrestled a troll or something I dunno.”

“I heard she just gave it the evil eye and it went away.”

“Well I heard she sang it a lullaby and it went right to sleep.”

The groups started giggling. Millicent shook her head and left them to it. She crossed her arms and started thinking where Pinkie could be.

Obviously she wasn’t lying about the troll. She must’ve done something. It could be that there was some sort of troll follow-up procedure? She was busy doing that?

That sounded a bit ridiculous

“I should study up on trolls.” She mumbled

“Trying to figure out if you’re related?”

Millicent turned around and was about to deck someone when she noticed it was Blaise. He had his hands raised in surrender. Come to think of it he wasn’t in defence either.

“Sorry bad joke. I get mean when I’m...I don’t know what you call this. Shocked?”

“Why would you be shocked?”

Blaise rubbed his neck. “Found Pinkie outside the Slytherin commons in a bad way. I had to take her to the hospital wing.”

Millicent felt something cold and deeply unpleasant settle in the pit of her stomach “What happened?”

“No idea. She said that she fell down some stairs.”

People often told her that she wasn’t the crispest cookie in the tin, but even Millicent could put two and two together.

No! She shouldn’t just jump to conclusions. Not again. She needed to investigate and find out what really happened. Find out all the facts.

With speed you wouldn’t think of a girl her size she ran towards the hospital wing.

xxx

Madam Pomfrey was reading a medical textbook behind her desk and taking notes. She looked to be concentrating so Millicent was able to walk right in without being noticed.

She found Pinkie asleep and looking pale. Her leg was in a cast and raised high above her head.

Millicent tried to be quiet but it seemed that Pinkie woke up anyway.

“Milly! You’re here!”

“Shh. I’m not supposed to-”

“I’M SO SORRY!” She bellowed right in Millicent’s ear. “I don’t know what I did but I’m sorry! Please don’t be mad at me any more. I think you’re really cool and-”

Her ravings were stopped by Millicent finger. She noticed that Pinkies speech was a little bit slurred. She seemed strange and out of it.

“I'm the one who's sorry Pinkie. I should've never believed Daphne. I... I don't know why I believed her.” Millicent sighed and looked away. “I guess I thought you were too good to be true. …I've never had a real friend before.”

Pouring her heart out made her feel lighter but when she turned back to look Pinkie in the eye she found that Pinkie was a little bit distracted by her hand.

“Wow. So veiny.” She said in complete fascination.

“She's had an adverse reaction to the calming draught.”

Millicent turned around and found madam Pomfrey behind her looking stern with her arms in her sides.

“I was trying to find out if I got a bad batch or if it was something else only to find you disturbing my patient.”

“MILLY IS COOL! Weeee.”

“Thank you Pinkie.”

She needn't have bothered to thank her. Pinkie was already fascinated with the ceiling. "The ceiling is tadpoles."

"..."

"..."

“Can you tell me what happened?”

Madam Pomfrey looked her deep in the eye. “She said she fell down the stairs.”

She looked at her like she was waiting for something from Millicent.

“What do you think of that story?”

Millicent had a couple of thoughts about that story but she was no snitch. Snitches end up in ditches.

“I don’t know. I wasn’t there. I only just heard about it.” If madam Pomfrey could just buzz off maybe she could ask Pinkie about what happened.

“Last time you were here you were at each others throats.”

“It wasn’t like that! And we’re friends now.”

“SPACE MUFFINS!… Mumble mumble….”

“Yeah, space muffins for life.”

That last outburst seemed to have sapped Pinkie of her energy because she quickly fell asleep soon after.

“Look... Can I just stay here for little while? Please? I’ll be quiet.”

Madam Pomfrey looked at her for a long time but then sighed.

“...Alright you can stay but I’m keeping my eye on you.” She turned around and got back to her studying.

Millicent grabbed hold of Pinkies hand and waited. She was trying to gauge how long it would take for madam Pomfrey to be thoroughly absorbed back in her work.

She had a thought that getting through to Pinkie was more a matter of asking the right questions.

Looking behind her and making sure that madam Pomfrey was busy she started whispering in Pinkie’s ear.

“What happened to you Pinkie?”

“Hm… fell down some...stairs.”

Shoot, no dice.

But then she had a thought.

“How many stairs were there?”

“Hm… Three… Maybe four.”

“Blond?”

“One of ‘em… Sure....Hm...They took my key.”

Millicent was confused by that last bit. Maybe her dreams were interfering.

“What about the others?”

“...Big...didn’t really see… Mm.”

She got a lot of information here still she needed one more piece.

“Boy stairs?”

“Uh huh… Big boy stairs and... A hyena.”

So… That was it then. If she got this right Draco and his two muppet buddies beat up Pinkie this morning. Millicent wondered what Daphne’s part was in all this. It was she that fed her all those lies yesterday. Probably to separate her from Pinkie she realised.

And if Daphne and Draco were plotting Pansy wasn’t far behind. A hyena… Right. She should recognised that laugh anywhere.

Still… Five people were a bit much for Millicent. She needed to come up with a plan. The thought to go to one of the teachers didn’t even enter her mind. She didn’t want them to get away with it by doing lines or a slap on the wrist.

She wanted revenge. She wanted blood.

xxx

The music room was eerily quiet. Millicent sat in front of a little desk with a bit of scrap parchment idly doodling.

Coming up with a plan is hard. Usually Pinkie did the planning. Then again Pinkie would probably try to talk her her out of it. She would probably say something like they should just try to get along.

…But Pinkie wasn’t here.

‘Millicent you can’t falter now! You need to find a way to even the odds.’

“Come on think.” She rubbed her eyes and bonked her forehead on the desk three times. “Even the odds… Even the odds...Even the odds.”

PLINK PLONK!

The noise was so loud in the completely silent room that she jumped up in fright and knocked her desk over.

“W-What was that!” She shouted to no one in particular. No response. The room was completely silent once more.

She went to investigate the sound and saw two brass instruments laying on the ground.

If they were musical instruments Millicent didn’t recognise them. They had four holes each. One for each finger she guessed, if you didn’t count the thumb, and when she put them on they felt strange.

They wouldn’t go very far up like a ring would. Instead they lingered on the highest joint of her fingers.

She had no idea how such a thing could make music.

Tentatively she tried to hit a nearby drum with them. She didn’t apply much force but she punched right through the drum head anyway.

Millicent looked at her new toy and smiled.

xxx

“I need to talk to you.”

Blaise was sitting in the library catching up on the defence lesson he'd missed.

“What about?”

Millicent didn’t respond. She just indicated with her head to follow him.

Once Millicent and Blaise were alone she gave Blaise one of the brass instruments. “Pinkie was ambushed by Draco and his mingebag friends.”

Blaise looked at the tool he was given in shock. He’d never think that the little shit would actually do something that heinous. From experience he knew that Draco was a coward.

“Why would he do something like that?”

“The usual blood-traitor tripe.” Millicent was tapping her foot impatiently. “Look, do you want to help out or not? I know you’re not that close to her or me for that matter, but I know where they are right now and that window is closing.”

Blaise stared at the tool he was given. “What happened to her…If I didn’t do something now I could never show my face to my family again…”

He nodded to Millicent. “I always wanted to have a go at the little ponce.” He dropped the brass knuckles in his pocket.

She smiled. “So did I.”

xxx

Draco had a good day. He put a blood-traitor in her place. He gave a girl a lovely gift that would surely help him when it was time to arrange marriages and he got an acceptable for defence this morning.

Yes life was pretty sweet. He slicked his hair back, made a kissy face and winked in the mirror. Outside the bathroom Crabbe and Goyle were waiting.

They left three astride only to be stopped by Millicent when they rounded the corner.

“I suppose you thought you were being very Slytherin.”

Draco’s smug expression made her want to vomit.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“… That’s it? That’s all you’ve got? You assaulted a girl with the three of you, put her in the hospital wing and that’s all you have to say for yourself?”

“Nobody can prove anything and my father will no doubt cover-”

“Yes we all know about your father. I can’t believe that after all the time I’ve known you you still have the ability to impress me with your cuntish ways.”

Draco pulled his wand and shoved it in her face. “Bet you’re not so tough now. I could show you your place just as easily as I could that gaudy slag.”

“What are you going to do with that? You’re a first year you numpty. You barely know which end to hold. Are you going to poke me with it?”

“My mother taught-”

Millicent slapped Draco’s wand out of his hand. There was a beat of silence as Draco stared dumbly at it as it rolled away.

Getting right up in his face and looking dangerous Millicent quietly put on the brass instrument in her pocket.

“Now listen to me very carefully Draco.” He was starting to look scared and was listening to every word. He never saw anybody this livid before.

“Fuck your father, right? He’s an albino looking twat with delusions of grandeur. Fuck your mother, I’ve never seen her do anything except lift a wine glass, and fuck your two nancy boyfriends here as well.”

Crabbe and Goyle looked a lot more threatening after that.

They didn’t get time to come up with a clever response.

She jumped up and held Draco tightly as she bit into his cheek hard. With blood dribbling down her chin she spit out a chunk and pushed him backwards. He was screaming the entire time.

The other two boys were startled and didn’t react immediately to the sudden brutal violence. It gave her enough time to get a good swing in on Crabbe on the left.

A dull thud and teeth exploded out of his face in a gory mess. He sagged to the ground and did not get up again.

Goyle grabbed her side and worked her to the ground. He started wailing on her but she was able to protect her face. One good hit went through, busted a tooth through her lip and started bleeding profusely.

Behind them Blaise had punched Draco hard in the kidney when he tried to flee and he had crumbled like a deflating flan.

He lay there whimpering quietly in a puddle of his own creation.

Blaise saw the pickle Millicent was in and clocked Goyle from behind right on his jaw. He could feel the bone give as the metal rearranged his face.

Goyle was spitting teeth as well when he fell off of Millicent and on to the floor.

A helping hand from Blaise put Millicent back on her feet.

“Thanks.” She said as they both turned their sights towards Draco who was trying to crawl away.

He hadn't gotten far.

Draco's ankle couldn't withstand the pressure when Millicent jumped on it with her full weight.

A loud crack resonated through the halls and Draco screamed.

Blaise winced when he heard it but he knew this place was deserted this time of day so he didn't give it further thought. He pulled Draco on his feet and held him against the wall.

“Say: I fell down some stairs.”

Confused by the non-sequitur Draco opened his eyes. “What?”

Millicent punched him in the side hitting his other kidney. “Say: I fell down some stairs!”

“...I fell down some stairs.”

“That’s right. You did, and you sadly pulled your faggoty friends with you.”

“...”

They let the whimpering wretch slump back down as Millicent gave him one more kick and spit in his face.

Blaise removed his brass knuckle and gave it back to Millicent. Together they went into the nearest bathroom to change their clothes and to wash away the blood.

“You know they couldn’t have thought of this themselves.”

“Yeah I know.”

“Theo?”

“Nah, this was Daphne, and Pansy as well I suppose.”

Taken aback Blaise’s couldn’t hide his surprise. “Really? Why?”

“We saw something we shouldn’t.”

“I shudder to think what would need all this.”

“We caught her playing muggle music.”

“...That’s it? That girl really needs to de-clench her anus.”

That made Millicent laugh.

“I can’t help you with them. My mother would kill me if she found out I manhandled a bunch of girls.”

“I know. Don’t worry about it. I’ve got a plan.”

xxx

It wasn’t a very good plan.

She was going to knock on their door. That was about it really. If the Slytherins in the common room cared about her busted lip they gave no indication of doing so. It was possible that they just didn’t see it since she passed so quickly.

Still the apathy in the house of the cunning was truly a sight to behold.

The dormitories themselves were relatively quiet. It was still early, though some did prefer the quiet of their own dorm to study.

Millicent knocked on the door and waited.

“Who is it?” Pansy shouted through the door. Millicent didn’t respond. She just knocked on the door again.

“Alright, alright hold you horses.”

When Pansy opened the door she had the pleasure to experience what is colloquially known as a ‘cunt punt.’

She shrieked but not for long. Millicent put her hand over her mouth, pushed her inside and closed the door. Pansy got thrown on the bed opposite a very cold looking Millicent.

“Where is Daphne?”

“You can’t do this! They’ll come for you. Draco will protect me.”

“Draco is currently lying in his own piss. Where is Daphne?”

Even though the very idea seemed preposterous she instinctively knew that Bullstrode wasn’t lying. She could tell that something about her had changed.

“I won’t tell you! You’re a pig! A vulgar, barbaric-”

“Yes, yes... Barbaric. That’s what you used to say when you thought I couldn’t hear it.”

She stood up from the bed and slowly inched closer towards the bed. Clenching and unclenching her hands in anticipation.

“But I did hear it. Over and over again. Well guess what Pansy? Today is the day you get to find out exactly by how much.”

“W-what are you going to do to me?”

“Something barbaric.”

xxx

“I don’t know! I Swear! I don’t know where she is! I haven’t seen her since defence!”

xxx

So Daphne’s done a runner. That’s interesting. She never seemed the running type. Perhaps she was plotting something with the older students?

It was going to have to wait.

When she saw her bed she was unconscious before she hit the pillow.

Author's Note

Geez... That went dark quick. I suspect this is probably what you might call one of those divisive chapters.

I love writing Millicent though. She's my favourite character to write.

Speaking of which...

This just might be the theme of Millicent Bullstrode. Listened to it a lot when writing.

Chapter 14: The Trials of Daphne Greengrass.

She looked through the blackboard with a thousand-yard stare. Despite Dumbledore's best efforts, concentrating was proving difficult.

Daphne Greengrass couldn't wait for this lesson to be over. It took everything in her power not to have a fit right then and there.

'Why? This was what you wanted.'

'I didn't want this!'

'Yes you did. You knew what they were and you wanted to be just like them.'

'…'

With closed eyes and a deep breath she tried to once again focus on the lesson.

It didn't work. Her own thoughts kept interrupting. Not to mention the memory of those screams...

She squeezed the bridge of her nose with her fingers as she tried to get herself under control.

'Stop it! Just stop.'

Her rudimentary occlumency was simply not enough to keep the waves of guilt at bay.

A problem which Draco and Pansy clearly didn't have.

They were admiring the necklace they...we stole. Pansy was sure it was made with some sort of exotic magical metal whereas Draco thought it was merely be-spelled to look like it did.

Daphne didn't care one way or the other. She just wanted to get out.

xxx

Mercifully class ended though it felt like it took forever. As quick as decency allowed Daphne made towards the nearest bathroom.

Vomit clattered in the bowl as she hugged it like her life depended on it. Thank goodness her hair was kept in a braid today otherwise it would've been drenched.

The thought gave her an ugly grin.

'Real pureblood princess. Covered in puke. Can't even...'

She sighed.

What would her parents think if they saw her now? Little Astoria... would she laugh? Maybe she would make a better heir after all.

With her stomach empty a sense of clarity set over her. The bathroom was completely abandoned except for her. Thank goodness for that. She wasn't in the mood for questions.

The reflection in the mirror looked like a stranger she came to despise. It felt like her body moved on it's own accord when she hit the glass.

Her wrist hurt but she hadn't even cracked the mirror. A small bead of blood formed on the knuckle of her middle-finger and she stared at it for a long time.

'It's just red.'

xxx

Ophelia was waiting, she just knew it. Those beautiful ebony and ivory keys would always accept her no matter what. Daphne took a moment to sit behind the piano and take it all in.

Then the memory from when she first played it popped in her head and she slammed the lid shut.

With her hand on her mouth, unbidden the tears came. She tried to stifle her sobs, unconsciously viewing it as a weakness. A moment passed just trying not to think of anything.

With shaking hands she raised the lid of the piano back up. Her hands knew what to do and she let her emotions run from her stomach, through her arms, through her fingers and finally to the keys.

Guilt, anger, self-loathing and despair were expressed through beautiful simple melodies that she knew would never be played again. But in here... In the Hogwarts music room. She could just let them come and go as they pleased.

xxx

It felt like hours passed in the blink of an eye. Daphne closed the lid of the piano and took a moment to just breathe.

It felt like she had to put her mask back on again...

With an astute sense of loss she left Ophelia to once again brave the Slytherin commons.

She was about to leave the music room when she heard footsteps outside. They sounded like they were coming closer at a rapid pace.

Daphne turned around to quickly hide behind the racks of instruments.

The door opened and Millicent Bullstrode came strutting in looking livid. Daphne could see Millicent easily from this position and she knew that the same would be true for herself.

Millicent sat down behind a nearby desk and started working on some parchments. Daphne noticed that she was mumbling a lot and the words she could make out spelled nothing good.

Slowly Daphne tried to inch further into the room.

'O please don't let her see me. Please don't let her see me. Please don't let her see me.'

Millicent seemed to be fully focused on her work however and didn't notice her.

Breathing a little easier now that she wasn't in immediate danger of discovery, Daphne wondered what Millicent was up to. It must've been important if she was doing it here. She could've easily done it in the common room.

Whatever Millicent was busying herself with wasn't succeeding because she was banging her head against the desk in frustration.

Daphne got scared the magic out of her when very close to where she was two things fell of the rack.

She was certain that she would be found. Fortunately she was on the other side and before Millicent could investigate Daphne laid down on her belly in hope of avoiding discovery.

“W-Who's there?” She heard Millicent ask.

Daphne kept her mouth shut and just hoped she would go away.

The footsteps didn't go away. They crept closer and closer on the other side...

Millicent must be just standing there or something. Could she see her? Had Daphne made a noise?

Suddenly she heard a loud bang and a tearing sound. It took every fibre of her being not to make a startled gasp but fortunately she held her breath and managed it.

She heard Millicent running out of the room shortly afterwards.
As the fear slowly left her system she shakily got back on her feet and stumbled towards the desk that Millicent was working on. The doodles she found were frightening. What was worse was that she deserved every punishment the images showed.

“...I can't deal with this...I can't deal...”

She looked at Ophelia.

xxx

Pinkie awoke to find herself in the hospital wing.

“Blechgch.”

She had a serious case of cotton mouth. Luckily a glass of water was already prepared for her and she drank eagerly.

The memories of yesterdays events returned and she felt herself deflate a little. Morosely she looked at her leg. To her surprise the cast had been removed and nothing hurt anymore. Everything was just a bit stiff. Like it wanted to move.

Pinkie was about to hop out of her bed to stretch when madam Pomfrey popped round the corner.

“Ah, you're awake that's good. We went on quite the adventure together but you should be fine now.” Madam Pomfrey started poking and prodding Pinkie.

“How's the leg? Everything moving alright?”

“Yepperoonie, everything is a-okay.”

“Good. The elves have put your toiletries over there.” Madam Pomfrey pointed underneath the table.” There is a shower in the back. If you hurry up you can still make breakfast.”

“I can go?”

“You can go.”

Pinkie grabbed her stuff and made for the showers but a glimpse from one of the other patients almost caused her to trip.

Gregory Goyle had a brace around his head. From what Pinkie could see he was still sleeping. She stared at him with all sorts of emotions roaring through her.

They weren't very fun at all.

The biggest of them was sadness. Nothing about this was okay. She had no idea how to start to fix it.

With resignation she took a quick shower and afterwards she made her way towards the great hall.

xxx

“Can I sit here?”

Harry nodded and gestured to the chair as he tried to stuff his face in a similar manner as Ron was. They were staring each other down. They had a stack of small sandwiches between them and Harry just finished what he started.

“Foo sanchswishes.”

Ron didn't look impressed and raised an eyebrow. He grabbed two sandwiches off the plate and stuffed them in his face in three chomps each.

“Fwee sanchwishes.”

Hermione was looking on in both amusement and disgust. “Boys...” She muttered. Looking over at Pinkie however did not supply the feminine sense of superiority she was hoping to share.

The last bit of a sandwich was stuffed in a cheek and she was staring those two boys down.

“Fou sanchwishes.”

It was Harry's turn again and to him came the task of stuffing three extra sandwiches in his gob. Sadly he wasn't up to the task and tried to swallow the big doughy mess in his mouth. He succeeded but only barely with plenty of gagging noises and burping.

With fascinated horror Hermione looked on. “Everyone I know is disgusting...”

Ron's turn came up and he grabbed two more and stuffed them in his cheeks and with a smug bread filled expression he said:

“Fihe sahwishes.”

Such a challenge... could not be borne. One by one more bread was consumed by Pinkies jaws and stuffed in her cheeks like a hamster.

“Pinkie, can I talk to you for a second?”

The voice caused Pinkie to almost choke and she spit a big chunk of nasty on her plate.

That was a bit much for Hermione to handle and she looked the other way waving with her hands “O, ew ew ew.”

For Pinkie the voice meant the end of the distraction. It was Millicent. She swallowed the rest and stood up and walked a little ways away from the Gryffindors.

Twiddling with her finger Millicent looked a little sheepishly at Pinkie.

“So... Do you remember our talk in the hospital wing?”

“Yeah I remember.”

“Now that your head is a bit more clear do you think we can still be friends? I got them you know. Me and Blaise gave 'em a lesson they won't soon forget.” Millicent slammed her fist in her hand.

“Oh...”

Millicent thought that Pinkie would be... Well not happy about it, but maybe a bit vindicated? “You don't seem very happy that we did that.”

Pinkie just shrugged.

“Pinkie... The world isn't always nice. You have to fight back!”

“Why?”

“...Just 'cause... Otherwise they never learn. You know?”

Millicent looked at Pinkie willing her to understand. She still felt like she might lose her friend over this disagreement.

“All I know is that I'm not happier. I don't think fighting back is meant for me.”

Interjecting seemed pointless to Millicent She was about to say something but Pinkie was quicker.

“Do you remember when we played that polka for the Weasley twins?”

A toothy grin expanded on Millicent's face. “How could I forget? That was brilliant.”

“That's me.”

Millicent looked sad when her words hit home. “...I'm sorry. I just couldn't forgive that they did that to you.”

And for the first time Pinkie smiled genuinely. “That's okay silly Milly!” She ruffled Millicent’s hair and with that simple gesture Millicent knew they would be alright.

“Well... There is one thing you have to do for me to make it even stevens...”

“Yeah, what's that?”

“Seven sandwiches.”

xxx

Ron had apologized as well after a bit of prompting from Hermione, though it took a moment with all that was going on to realize what he was actually on about. Especially with all that bread in his mouth. Pinkie appreciated the gesture all the same and gave him a big hug.

The entire group went to the first lesson of the day together: potions.

Pinkie sat next to Millicent since she wanted a little help with the stirring. Millicent tended to not follow through with her withershins stirs.

They were well within their potion preparations when Pinkie noticed something.

“Hey, where's Daphne?”

Millicent raised her hands while still concentrating on her work. “Don't look at me she wasn't in the dorms last night either.” She looked around the room and snickered when she saw Pansy looking miserable being partnered with Neville.

Poor Neville looked completely nauseous being close to Pansy stacked upon his usual potions jitters. No doubt a spectacular bang was in the cards.

Rubbing her chin Pinkie looked thoughtful. “Hmm... Want to come looking for her after class?”

Millicent shrugged. “Sure.”

xxx

After searching through most of the castle and some hidey places outside of it there was really only one place she could be.

“She's probably just in the music room.”

“Yeah let's go check! If she's not there we can at least shred some tunes!”

“Yeah alright.”

The halls on the way were quiet so it was easy to hear the sad guitar music that was playing when they approached. Pinkie and Millicent looked at each other and sneaked closer to press their ears against the door to the music room.

The music seemed sombre. They could hear singing as well but they couldn't make out the lyrics.

They sat there listening for quite a while. There was no doubt they had found Daphne.

Pinkie tried to lower the door handle quietly. The singing didn't stop. Millicent and Pinkie tried to enter silently but that caused the music to cease.

A frightened Daphne was what greeted them. She had big bags under her eyes and her hair looked completely dishevelled.

They stared at one another for a moment before Daphne shrieked and threw the guitar at them.

Pinkie ducked and the guitar smashed against the wall in countless bits and pieces. Daphne ran from them but really there was nowhere to run.

They chased her to the end of an isle. A dead end.

Daphne who wasn't used to exertions was breathing heavily. The lack of sleep and food didn't help much either. She hunched over held the wall as she tried to breath.

“I suppose you'll want re-”

“Why did you do it Daphne?” Pinkies voice was was full of hurt trying to figure out this puzzle.

Thousands of thoughts raced through Daphne's mind. 'Because you knew my secret.' 'Because you are a blood traitor and you were weak.' 'Because you came to close!'

None of these were good enough she knew.

“Because... I'm a bad person.”

The words left her mouth before she realized what she said. The shock of hearing them, from sharing them, caused her eyes to well up once more. She slid down the wall and sat on the floor.

“Yeah, you're an evil sewer-skank!”

“Milly! Don't say that!”

“Well she is! Who goes around trying to ruin friendships? Because she listens to the wrong music no less. It's ridiculous.”

The words felt like another dagger in her heart. Why did her parents never told her that schemes would hurt so many? Pinkie was just supposed to be cowed into submission.

Was that wrong too? Nothing made sense anymore.

“It's not helping.” Pinkie grabbed Daphne's hand. Trying to be supportive she sat down next to her.

“Oh Daphne you're not a bad person. Why don't you sit with me and Milly from now on? We can be friends.”

“Pff.” Millicent threw her hands up and looked the other way.

She was ignored by Daphne. “I can't do that. Do you have any idea what my parents would do if they realized I was talking to you? I would be disowned or worse!”

“Why?”

“I'm heir to the house of Greengrass. You're a blood traitor. They would say you've rejected the old ways and therefore are beyond redemption.”

“Well... that's completely bananas!”

“They won't care and mind your words. They are my parents.”

The girls sat together like that for a while in silence. Millicent was pacing through the isle grabbing random objects and putting them back. Daphne and Pinkie both were wondering what went through her head for different reasons.

“I suppose we could just...Not tell anyone.” Pinkie said suddenly. “We could just meet here every once in a while to make music and goof around.”

“You do realize that I would still be cruel to you outside of this room?”

“... I don't mind.”

Hearing Pinkies pronouncement caused Millicent to come stomping back. “Don't do that Pinkie! She's just trying to have her cake and eat it! She's just manipulating us again can't you see that?”

“Uhm... Milly can I talk to you for a second over there please?”

Daphne watched as Pinkie grabbed Millicent's hand and dragged her out of hearing range. She saw Millicent gesticulating wildly and she heard some angry whispers but she couldn't make out the words.

Slowly Millicent's gestures reduced in their intensity and allowed Pinkie to whisper in her ear. Pinkie leaned on Millicent shoulder as she made her point. Suddenly Millicent made an 'ooh' noise of understanding.

They returned and Millicent had a big smile on her face.

“We accept this unconventional friendship. However there is one thing you have to do for us... You have to bring back Pinkie's necklace.”

The necklace. Daphne had completely forgotten about that.

“...I'll do it. If... If I get this for you... Will you forgive me?”

Pinkie grabbed her around the waist. It took a while for Daphne to realize that she was being hugged.

“I already have silly. That necklace is really kinda important to me is all.”

Millicent was a lot less nice about it though. She gestured toward her own eyes with two fingers and then pointed one towards Daphne.

Daphne was released from Pinkies embrace and an awkward silence followed.

“I guess I'll leave first.” Daphne said. “To keep up appearances and all that.”

“Okay. See you on the flip side!”

Trying to figure out what that meant took to much energy out of Daphne as she left the room. Tired, numb but also a little bit relieved she headed towards the dungeons. She wondered idly how she would get that damn necklace back.

That was a problem for tomorrow Daphne.

xxx

Millicent and Pinkie were trying to recreate Daphne's song but they got nowhere. They still had a lot of fun trying but it was clear that neither of them was really that talented with fancy instruments. Or sad songs for that matter.

On the way back to the Slytherin common room Millicent wondered; “Do you think it will work?”

“Of course! And if it somehow doesn't it will anyway.”

“You seem awfully sure.”

“That's because I'm an evil, friendly, scheming genius.”

Pinkie twirled around and giggled when she opened the door to the Slytherin common room.

The stern faces of professor Snape and headmaster Dumbledore greeted her. The room was filled with numerous adults who could only be the parents of everyone involved in this latest mess.

Dumbledore looked every bit the stern teacher that Pinkie knew he could be.

“Miss Pie, miss Bullstrode. We've been waiting for you. If you would take your seats over there we can begin.”

“Oh...shoot.”

Author's Note

Daphne's guitar song.

Chapter 15: Meet the Parents

It seemed that all the parents of the first year Slytherins were invited to this gathering. Pinkie tried to find Maddie in the crowd but she couldn't find her.

Luckily Albie was here as well. Surely he would have her back.

Pinkie and Millicent shuffled their way towards their designated seats. Pinkie noticed that Millicent was sitting next to a woman who was a lot like an older Milly. She looked a lot more womanly though and her face was a lot more gentle looking.

Daphne's dad was easy to recognise. Her father had the same blue piercing laser eyes that her daughter had though his looked decidedly less friendly.

Blaise sat next to a woman who wore a lot of jewellery. She looked Mediterranean and had a purple scarf around her head. As for Blaise himself he didn’t appear worried.

The parents of Crabbe and Goyle looked mostly to Draco's dad to tell them what to do. Draco himself did his best to appear as miserable as possible. Crabbe and Goyle didn’t quite get the look down and just looked like weird guilty fish.

Pansy's father seemed quite cunning as he stroked his small beard.

Pinkie sat down next to professor Snape. Maybe he would have her back as well.

Dumbledore rose from his seat. “Millicent Bulstrode and Blaise Zabini. Draco Malfoy has accused you of orchestrating an unprovoked attack on him and his friends. Do you-”

Millicent snorted. “It was hardly unprovoked.” She gave Draco a hard stare. “That idiot had it coming.”

The pretty lady next to her looked shocked by her outburst. “Milly! Our parents didn’t raise us this way. Why would you-”

“Our parents didn’t raise me at all!” Millicent crossed her arms and huffed in anger.

It was true that as heir their parents had focused more of their attention on Mildred. But she always thought that they at least were close. She also knew that Millicent was a hotheaded girl but she wasn’t cruel.

Blaise’s mother decided to distract everyone. “Blaise why don’t you tell us what happened? I believe everyone here would like to hear your view.”

“Hmm… Well it started for me when I found a battered Pinkie on my way to class.”

Draco’s father looked unimpressed. “What in Merlins name is a Pinkie?”

“…I’m Pinkie.”

It was like she was beneath his notice until then despite her impressively recognisable hair. Pinkie was starting to be a little annoyed by his dismissive attitude. It has been a long day after all.

“I see...”

“Moving right along.” Blaise interrupted. “I brought her to the hospital wing and I thought that would be that. The whole experience left me a bit shook I must say.”

Dumbledore raised an inquisitive eyebrow. “And did she tell you how she came to be in such a state?”

“I'm in the room you know!”

He turned towards Pinkie. “Indeed you are. I believe you told madam Pomfrey you fell down the stairs?”

“Well...”

Blaise replied instead. “She told me the same thing.”

“And what did you think of that assessment?”

“Thought it was bullocks. But you don't start debates when you find someone hurt like that.”

Blaise's mother pinched his ear to the entertainment of the people present. “Language!”

“Quite. What did you think happened mister Zabini?”

“I thought she got beat up.”

“Why did you think that?”

“Just looked like it I suppose.”

“Why do you think that Pinkie would lie to you?”

“I don't know...embarrassment maybe? Truth be told it's hard to imagine what goes on inside her head.”

Dumbledore sighed deeply. “And what about you miss Bulstrode?”

“Pinkie told me Draco, Crabbe and Goyle did it when I visited Pinkie in the Hospital wing. Then I asked Zabini to join me in kicking their asses.”

“No I didn't! I said we were muffins.”

Millicent's expression was rather done in. She was tired as well. “You talk in your sleep.”

Dumbledore would always trust a Bulstrode to get to the heart of the matter. “I see...Why did you not go to-”

Draco's father suddenly jumped in. “So my son had to endure an horrendous assault because of the potioned up ramblings of a mu...ggleborn?!” He gestured dramatically. “What sort of institution are you running here Albus?”

“A school Lucius as you well know.” Albus remained calm to the annoyance of Draco's dad. “If you are inquiring as to how this could have happened and all that. That is what this gathering is all about. Now.” He turned towards Pinkie. “Is what miss Bulstrode told us the truth?”

“...Yes.”

“So the actions of miss Bulstrode and mister Zabini were in retaliation for the actions of mister Malfoy?”

“Yes. I think so.”

He looked to the two other children with an inquisitive eyebrow.

“Yes.”

“Yes.”

He turned towards Draco. “So mister Malfoy is not as innocent as he would've liked us to believe?”

Lucius was dismissive. “The girl is obviously lying. Most likely to hide her own crimes which we haven't even discussed.”

“That's because there are none.”

“Don't be naïve Albus. Where two are fighting two are guilty. She's probably the one who instigated all of this somehow. She's the first who got beaten after all.”

Dumbledore scuffed in surprised.

“By that rationale all victims are the perpetrators of the crimes against them. That's quite a position to take even for you, Lucius.”

Pinkie didn't like any of this but he understood where he was coming from. It couldn't be fun to have your son painted as the bad guy.

She liked how Albie was defending her though. He was a real pal.

Lucius was grinding his teeth. “We're not talking about a bill in the wizengamot here. We're talking about a brawl between children.”

“Then I shudder to imagine what you believe Pinkie here as done to your son.”

All eyes shifted towards Pinkie who found herself in the position to try to look as innocent as possible because she was.

Draco meanwhile sported an ugly grin that went unnoticed. He was about to start some sob story about how she was about to steal his magic when out of the corner a small voice could be heard.

“...It's my fault.”

Surprise swept through the crowd.

“It's my fault alright!” It was Daphne Greengrass. She was crying but was also determined.

Even though she was afraid that her parents would punish her the entire sordid tale came tumbling out. The manipulations, the lies, all of it.

Well maybe not all of it. She cleverly avoided speaking about her true motivations at the time and instead made up a story about some imagined slight from Pinkie.

The room was left in stunned silence. Both by her dastardly plotting and her apology.

Dumbledore rubbed his beard in contemplation and broke the silence. “I see...I think we all have a clear picture now. It started with Daphne, who instigated an attack on Pinkie, who's friends retaliated on Draco, Gregory and Vincent.”

He sighed deeply. “I must confess I feared I had to expel some people for these acts of senseless violence.”

Several gasps were heard from the crowd.

“Due to the young age of the persons responsible we will not go that route. However, extensive detentions shall be served with professor Snape and mister Filch till the Christmas hols for all those who inflicted injury on another person. This includes miss Greengrass.”

He looked around the crowd but didn't get any objections. “Good, I will allow a moment with the parents to say goodbye, then it's of to bed with you lot!” He pointed towards the children and finished with a smile.

xxx

His mother was an imposing figure. With her dark skin green eyes and black hair she was known in Britain as the true pureblood iron queen of the Zabini family.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

Oh she was the leader of the Zabini family for certain and they were powerful.

But her blood was as pure as her conscience was clear.

They were the Zingari. Italian Roma or Gypsies and they found in this magical Britain a wonderful set of business opportunities.

So of course their blood was pure and anyone who asked questions was bribed with a hefty sum of gold, cursed though it might be.

This was all fair, after all, you shouldn't ask questions in the first place.

So now they were as pure as the driven snow.

Their family was decidedly matriarchal and yet Blaise had earned himself some respect with his family members even at a young age. With his easy attitude and subtle intelligence he had made himself useful.

“This was unlike you.” His mother said.

“You think so?” Blaise smirked at his mother. “I figured you'd approve given your own historic actions on such matters.”

Her actions were legendary in certain circles.

“I never said I wasn't proud. I said it wasn't like you. Normally you seem more detached.” She got a sly smile on her face. “Perhaps there was something personal about this particular girl? Hmm?”

Blaise refused to get baited. “Not particularly. She doesn't seem to be overly bright. Funny though. I suppose it was a little bit personal.”

“The Malfoys will be displeased.”

“I say fuck 'm.”

“...Still a bit young.” She boxed his ear out of habit “Language. We are upstanding citizens are we not?”

“Yes mother.”

They hugged each other.

“I’m looking forward to the holidays.”

“Me too.”

xxx

Lucius had difficulty keeping the disappointment from his face. His son was schemed upon by that Greengrass girl. It was clear that he would need to hasten his son's education come next Yuletide. For now it could wait.

“What is your opinion on what happened here tonight?” He asked his son.

“It didn't go well?”

“...Evidently. Tell me what really happened with the girl.”

“Well... Daphne was saying that she was a blood traitor and that someone should really put her in her pla-”

“A traitor? She's not a muggleborn?”

“No, apparently she's the last living member of the Pie family.”

“Oh? Interesting...So they yet live.” Lucius was trying to figure out the ramifications of this news. Predominately a mining family. Very involved with muggles. Wealth unknown. One of the most ancient families there was. Kept to themselves mostly.

“You're not mad about that? I thought we... You know.”

“No it wasn't us. Nobody knows who did it.”

Lucius had come to a decision. “For now I want you to leave this girl alone. Dumbledore will no doubt keep his eye on you forthwith and she's not worth the effort.”

After a moment to look at his son and to make sure the message had sunken in he changed the topic.

“What do you think of that Greengrass girl?”

“Beautiful, clever but also rather soulless and dull.”

“Hmm...What would you think of a marriage with her?”

Draco turned a little green around the gills. “...I'd prefer Pansy. Maybe not as pretty but certainly more lively.”

“You disappoint me Draco. It's what's best for the family that matters.”

Draco put forward his stiff upper lip. “I understand father.”

Lucius took a deep breath. “I suppose it doesn't matter right now. It's still early days for you.”

A silence fell between them as they both thought things through. Lucius grabbed a pinch of floo powder and turned toward his son.

“I will discuss things with your mother. I'm sure she will send you an owl with her thoughts. Goodnight Draco.”

“Goodnight father.”

xxx

Daphne was a ball of nervous energy as she was led into an empty study room by her father. Was this where she was going to be disowned? She couldn't make out his expression from this angle which didn't help.

He closed the door behind her cast a privacy charm and slowly started clapping.

“Well played my daughter. Well played.” He said smiling. “When we were summoned to the school this afternoon and told you weren't attending classes I feared the worst.”

Daphne had difficulty keeping the surprise from her face. She was so certain that her father would be livid.

Her father continued without paying any attention to her. “The Malfoys owe us now for you taking the heat and at the same time everyone present noticed your cleverness. Dumbledore ate it all up! No doubt everybody will be clamouring for your hand in a few years.”

He turned around and hugged his daughter awkwardly.

This was what she'd always wanted. She felt relief that her father wasn't angry with her but at the same time... She felt so dirty.

“...”

“Daphne? What's wrong?”

“...Just tired I guess. It's been a long couple of days.”

“I can imagine. I'll tell your mother the news. She will be relieved I'm sure.”

xxx

Pinkie was left with Albie in the common room. He looked patiently at the nearby paintings waiting for her to gather her thoughts.

“Maddie wasn't here.”

“No, she was not.”

“Because she's muggle?”

“Just so.”

“...”

Professor Dumbledore conjured himself a comfortable chair and sat in front of Pinkie. His pockets seemed a bit deeper then they should have been when he pulled something from them.

“Would you like a muffin?” He asked while offering her a chocolate flavoured one.

The gesture brought a smile on her face and she grabbed it eagerly. “You stole my trademark.”

Despite the comment her mood was lifted ever so slightly and it relieved Dumbledore to know that she would probably be alright.

“I fear it's but a meagre imitation compared to your own creations. Still I've found it a good idea to keep a few on hand nowadays. You never know when you will encounter a student who might need a pick me up.”

“I know right? Very useful.” Pinkie broke a piece from her muffin and gave it to Albie. He took it eagerly.

“The house elves do their best but it's never quite the same. I've asked them why yours taste so different and all I get in return are stares as if I just asked a stupid question. That's a very concerning look to be getting from a house elf let me tell you.”

He looked at her inquisitively but a shrug was all he received as an explanation.

“Fine keep your secrets. Leave an old man with his cravings.”

They ate together in a moment of pleasant silence. “So... Will I sleep tonight ruminating on the true sequence of events, or was there perhaps more to the story of the past couple of days?”

“There is always more to a good story.”

“Something I should know?”

She thought it through for a while. “Nah, I think things will sort themselves out on their own.”

From out of nowhere she pulled two bottles of butterbeer and gave one to Albie straw included.

“I've hidden beverages around the castle in case of washing down emergencies.”

Albus made an appreciative noise and slurped his drink with joy.

“Do you think professor Snape would appreciate a pick me up? He was very quiet tonight.”

Thoughtfully Albus considered the notion. “He was... in a tricky position.”

Nodding along sagely she agreed. “It can be hard to stand up to your friends.” Pinkie sipped her drink.

“Yes...something like that.”

After a moment of quiet deliberation with himself Professor Dumbledore put his bottle on the floor for a moment and readjusted his glasses. “Professor Flitwick has informed me that you're having issues with your wand magic practicals.”

“...Teachers sure do like to gossip.”

Albie pulled his wand from his robe. “Indeed we do. Since I am the current defence teacher perhaps I could provide you some additional assistance next time you are in my classroom?”

He conjured some lovely looking butterflies that flapped around the room. “For the small fee of extra cupcakes of course.”

Pinkie narrowed her eyes shrewdly “So I'd be paying you for what you should be doing anyway?”

Albie looked faux hurt. “No... No, no, no, no, no... No...Yes?...I'm a very busy man...I'm old?”

They laughed.

xxx

“They couldn't even be bothered...”

Her sister looked at her with pity which only made her even more angry.

“They had a very important meeting that-”

“There's always a dumb meeting! I've nearly beaten people to death. You'd think they'd show up!”

Mildred grabbed her suddenly and held her tight to her chest. “Oh Milly... Do I not count?”

All the fight left Millicent and her arms sagged to her sides. The little room was filled with the sound of quiet sniffles.

“...You count.”

“So it's still Millie and Milly?”

“...Yeah.”

Mildred released her sister. “I know that you... our parents...” She sighed.

“Having all their expectations heaved upon you isn't easy either.”

For a moment Millicent was about to say something but then she thought better of it.

“Just... Enjoy your time here at Hogwarts alright? I think I had the best days of my life in these halls.” Mildred touched one of the pillars then smiled at her sister. “It wasn't all doom and gloom here these past few months was it? Tell me about this Pinkie. She seemed nice.”

It didn't take much further coaxing from her sister for Millicent to start waxing poetic of the various adventures they'd already had.

When the time came for Mildred to leave both of them had smiles on their faces.

xxx

Pansy's father was stroking his goatee. A habit of his when he was thinking.

“So how did you escape Dumbledore's ire? I know you and Draco are thick as thieves. I have no doubt that you were there as well.”

A sense of pride filled Pansy as she explained. “I made sure I didn't physically hurt anyone and that I never ended up in the hospital wing.”

She suddenly remembered Millicents 'treatment” and shuddered. “Regardless of Bulstrode's machinations.”

“Do you think she will be trouble?”

“...Nah. She had her fun.”

A memory popped in her head. “Oh speaking of fun. Look what Draco gave me!”

She showed her father the necklace key. It sparkled purely in the torchlight of the castle, casting strange shadows on its walls.

“He took it from that silly Pie girl for me. It was so romantic.” She sighed.

“Pie?!” mister Parkinson grabbed the key with his robe making sure not to touch the metal with his bare skin. “This is a Pie family heirloom?! That girl is of the Pie family?”

Pansy felt shock from her fathers intense reaction. “Yes?”

“Give that to me. Quickly now, who knows what those lunatics have done with it.”

Her hands trembled as she gave the necklace to her dad.

He put it in his pocket making again sure not to touch it. Both were waiting for something to happen but it never did.

“How are you feeling?”

“Startled mostly and a bit sad that I can’t keep it. You really think there's something wrong with it?”

Relief flooded his face as he confirmed something. “I don't know but it's best to err on the side of caution.”

Still saddened by the loss of something so precious Pansy started moping. A sight that her father could never resist. Still... Needs must.

“I will send our regards to the Malfoys for this gift. We must be rid of it however. It is technically stolen and those Pies were always a zealous lot.”

“Yes father. I understand.”

“Good.”

He kissed her on her brow, turned around and stepped through the floo.

Chapter 16: The Great De-Clenching

Where in the name of magic was that thing!

Daphne had searched Pansy's side of the room top to bottom. Had she hidden it somewhere else? Was there no other way? If only she knew more magic. A summoning charm maybe.

But it was no use. She didn't know it and it was clear that it wasn't in this room.

Now she had to clean everything up before Pansy came back and then she'd have detention with mister Filch.

"Damn!"

She kicked the nightstand and nearly broke her toe. She was glad that there wasn't anyone here to see it.

“Now what am I going to do?”

xxx

It was time for her first seeker practice! Pinkie was loaned one of the school brooms for the occasion.

Professor Snape was adamant not to damage it. Well, not to damage it any further. The bristles were standing at odd angles and the wood was a bit splintery but it wasn't anything that a little bit of tactical spell 'o tape couldn't fix.

She was a little bit sad that Millicent wasn't here to see her first practice but she was serving her first detention with mister Filch.

Her Gryffindor friends were of course, banned from watching.

The excitement had caused her to be a little bit on the early side today so she'd put tasty energizing cookies in the locker rooms for extra enthusiasm during the drills.

She was already on the pitch in her full sports robes when the other players started trickling in. The realization that she could've done some practice flights instead of the cookies didn't make her feel bad. She would just do that next practice.

Eight people in total including herself made it onto the pitch and there were a few people spectating in the stands as well. It was also possible that they just found a quiet place to do their homework.

Magic allowed for some strange habits.

She knew that their team captain was Marcus Flint and that she would spend the day mostly with Terence Higgs learning about seeker shenanigans and whatnot.

Terence looked like an easygoing, friendly sort of guy. He had his broom lackadaisically over his shoulder and greeted Pinkie earnestly.

He explained the basic rules of Quidditch and their role in it quickly. Pinkie knew already but it was always wise to revise. It looked like he had some things to say about her broom but decided to keep them to himself.

The first thing they did was catch snitches. Terrence would release one and then they would both try to find it.

Pinkie thought it was a lot of fun trying to outwit her opponent but it was obvious after a few minutes that Terence would not be outwitted.

He was always a little bit faster, a little bit more agile, and a little bit more observant.

Pinkie didn't mind though. She paid close attention to him every time he gave advise and asked pointed questions ranging from broom techniques to searching strategies.

Back on the ground Pinkie told him that it was only the second time she was on a broom and that the first time was with the lesson with madam Hooch.

Terence seemed mildly impressed. “Not bad at all young 'un. We might make a seeker out of you yet.”

Well, it went without saying that after that compliment Pinkie was practically glowing.

The other players were just about done with their role specific drills as well and joined them on the ground.

Marcus Flint gestured towards Pinkie. “How did she do?”

“Not bad at all for a firstie. She certainly has those minerals.”

“Aw, thanks Terence.”

Introductions were made. There was of course Terence and Marcus the captain and chaser. Then came chaser Adrian Pucey. Miles Bletchley who was a keeper. Two burly looking beaters named Caspar and Cassius. And Edward who was also a chaser.

Pinkie would be the only girl in the team if she could make the cut.

Marcus called for a practice test just for her so that everyone could see what she was capable of.

He had Caspar and Cassius hit bludgers at her from oblique angles so she had to dodge them and find the snitch at the same time. It was obvious that they were taking it easy on her when she saw how hard they were smacking the bludger at Terence.

With the harsher treatment Terence still looked much more at ease then Pinkie did.

For Pinkie it was still a little scary but at the same time incredibly exciting. She could tell that she was improving quite a lot just by flying around.

The test ended as was expected. She didn't catch the snitch. The last couple of seconds were quite fun though. She actually saw the snitch first and raced after it like a dog after a bone. Terence was just faster then she was.

Her first practice ended in good cheer. Even though she herself was not yet allowed to play an actual match. She couldn't wait to see how Harry would do against them.

xxx

“Merlin's beard, what?!” Daphne was getting really annoyed of Millicent evil eying her like some weirdo.

Or maybe the fumes were getting to her.

They were scrubbing away at old chamber pots with rags and a dubious cleaning potion. Possibly muggle in origin.

“Nothing.” Millicent said. “Just wondering what you're scheming about now.”

Daphne sighed and continued her scrubbing.

“...I couldn't find the necklace.”

“What? How could you not find it? It’s the most gaudy thing ever!”

“It wasn’t in the dorm. I’ll try and figure something else out... If Pansy send it home already… I don’t know what I can do.”

Millicent shrugged and spit on the chamber pot to the disgust of Daphne and continued her own cleaning.

“Sounds like one of them ‘your’ problems.”

“...”

“Are you still coming tonight? I don’t really care, but if you don’t, I’m sure Pinkie wouldn’t like it.”

“I said I would.”

Millicent scuffed.

They continued their cleaning in tense silence.

xxx

Pinkie was glad to see that Blaise had joined them at the dinner table. He wasn’t just being nice then! He really meant it when he said they were friends. Pinkie was smiling as she gobbled up her black pudding.

It was an experiment she had set up with the elves. It had liquorice flavouring. So far the reviews were mixed.

“How was detention?”

“Awful.” Blaise and Millicent said in unison to the amusement of Pinkie. Blaise started a twisted tale of Snape forcing them to help Hagrid clear out the thestral stables.

“Still it wasn't all bad. Seeing Draco in a bad mood is always funny.”

Millicent grinned. “Yeah I'll bet. Did he go off on a tangent how he would tell his father about this?”

“Like a broken record.” Blaise looked thoughtful for a second. “Crabbe and Goyle seemed happy though.”

Pinkie had found her way through the pudding. “I think Draco is a bad influence on those two...”

For some reason that set Blaise and Milly off in a fit of giggles.

“Yeah, I think so too.” Milly said when she'd calmed down a bit. “Maybe we should free them from his evil clutches.”

“I think that's going to be tricky. There's something weird going on with those families.”

Millicent and Pinkie thought it through.

“I'd rather wish Draco wasn't evil at all.” Pinkie said “Do you think that their might be a way for us to unevilify him?”

“Human wisdom has it's limits.” Millicent said sagely.

Blaise spat out his broccoli and laughed.

When he calmed down he said: “Some people just enjoy being high and mighty. I don't know if Draco is one of those people but he sure seems like it.”

On that rather sobering bombshell silence descended upon the group.

“Hmm, then I'll just take the long way round.” Pinkie said with determination.

Milly looked at Blaise.“What does that mean?”

He shrugged. “Suppose it means that our strange friend has cooked up some sort of hair brained scheme.”

Waving the comment away Pinkie wasn't deterred. “I just meant that I'll change the world instead. Then he can be nice again.”

“...”

“...”

Blaise and Millicent both looked at her like she grew a second head. “Well, you're certainly not lacking in ambition.” Blaise said. “A true Slytherin after all.”

Pinkie smiled and jumped up from the table. She started pulling Millicent along towards the exit. “Come on Milly! Let's go do girl stuff.”

“What's girl stuff?”

“You're not supposed to ask that when boys are around, silly.” She winked at Blaise who in truth had no idea what was going on.

He was left alone at the table. Rather enjoying the silence he continued his food in peace, thinking on the developments of the last few days. He could do with meeting new people. Maybe those Gryffindors Pinkie likes to hang around with?

xxx

Pinkie had dragged Millicent all the way to the music room. She did the little ritual to open up the chamber to them.

“So, what was that all about?” Millicent asked a little exasperated.

Smiling Pinkie opened the door. “No particular reason. I just wanted to do some music I guess.”

“And Blaise is not invited?”

Pinkie looked shocked and happy. “I thought you wanted to keep the room a secret?”

“I do. But Blaise is alright.”

“Well, let's ask him later then. This is going to be great!”

They entered the room to find Daphne already there. She was browsing the shelves and hadn't noticed them come in.

Pinkie saw an opportunity.

She sneaked in on her tippy-toes. “Another sneak hug attack!”

Daphne was startled as Pinkie wrapped her arms around her. “What are you doing!” She shouted as she tried to wiggle free.

Pinkie let her go and giggled. “You looked huggable.”

Uncomfortable in a way that she couldn't really describe Daphne cleared her throat. “You might think differently soon... I-I couldn't find your key.”

“Aww...” Pinkie looked sad and disappointed. It was a look that Daphne found painful to look upon.

“I'm sorry.” She said quietly.

Pinkie shook her head. “Well... Did you do your best?”

“I... Yes of course. I think Pansy might have found a way to smuggle it outside the castle.”

With a deep breath Pinkie sighed. “O well... I'd rather have another friend then a pretty necklace.”

Daphne got hugged again and this time she awkwardly tried to reciprocate. She was surprised that the other girl would still call her friend after all she’d done.

Millicent entered the isle with a gargantuan drum around her neck and what appeared to be some sort of cymbal on her head.

“Enough moping. Let's make some racket!”

xxx

Daphne sat behind Ophelia trying to remember when the last time was when she had this much fun. Up until this point music was always a tool, a means to an end to try and achieve her goals. Even their polka moment with the twins was out of a desire to get even.

This was something different. Even though they sounded absolutely terrible and her tutors would have a stroke if they saw their terrible technique, she couldn't help but smile.

Pinkie was riding her unicycle again, playing the trumpet this time. Playing was the most accurate word for the situation because the sounds that were produced could hardly be called music.

The beat Millicent made was quite accurate though, Daphne had to admit. The girl had a strong sense of timing.

Daphne was looking at the scene when suddenly Pinkie seemed to lose her balance, wobbled a little bit this way and that, and managed to crash headfirst into Millicent's drum with a loud 'pa-boom.'

“Toot.” Went the trumpet.

Daphne burst into laughter.

“Ha ha HA HAAANK! HOOOONK! HA-”

Mortified she slapped her hands over her mouth and looked at her...friends, but it appeared that the damage was already done.

Slowly Pinkie removed herself from the drum and turned her head towards Daphne.

She smiled as if Daphne just gave her the best gift ever. Pinkie put the trumpet on top of her own head and inched closer.

“Hey Daphne...”

“...Yes?”

“Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?”

Completely lost at the non-sequitur Daphne removed her hands from her mouth.

“W-what? What are you-”

“It got stuck in a crack, Daph... It got stuck in a crack.”

Daphne exhaled through her nose and felt laughter bubbling up, so she slapped her hands in front of her mouth again and suppressed it with all of her willpower.

Pinkie was inching closer now smelling weakness. Like a bloodhound, she looked deeply into Daphne's eyes.

“What do you call the ghost of a dead chicken?”

“Hfff, hff, hf, hf I dunno please stop it I-”

“It's a poultry-geist.”

Daphne knew she couldn't suppress this one so she opted instead to just hold her breath as tears were slowly rolling down her cheeks.

“Hey Daph?”

The only response Pinkie got was a high squeak sort of sound.

“Know why you shouldn't write with a dull quill?”

“...”

“It's pointless.”

“Pff, hff, hff, hff, ha, ha, HA HAAAANK! HOOOONK! HAAAANK! HOOOONK!”

Millicent burst into roaring laughter as well. With the heavy drum on her stomach still, she didn’t have the strength to get up. Instead she sort of flopped around which set Daphne off again.

“HAAAAANK! HOOONK!”

Which in turn set Millicent off again.

Pinkies own giggle snort joined in the frey and all three girls were soon all rolling on the floor stuck in a giggle loop.

“HAAANNK! HOONK!”

It was like Pinkie had struck gold. She’d heard goofy laughs before, she’d heard infectious laughs before. But to stumble upon both in the same person? Magical.

“Hey Daphne?”

“Ple- HOOONK! HOONK! No more!”

“Know what they call cheese that's not yours?”

“HOOONK!”

“It's nacho cheese.”

Daphne didn't even understand why that was funny but she started to laugh all over again.

“HOONK! HAAAANK!”

Millicent finally rolled the drum off of her as her giggles subsided.

“Geez Daphne,” she said between giggle bouts “I've never heard you like that before. Never knew you were related to geese.”

Daphne was still having trouble containing her laughter but she was also worried. She had no tools at her disposal to keep this secret. The realization made her laughter melt like snow in the summer sun.

“Please don't tell anybody...”

The remark confused Pinkie. “Tell them what?”

“About how I laugh.”

“You have a wonderful laugh! Oh, I know, this is like the muggle music thing again isn't it?”

“...Yeah something like that.”

Suddenly Pinkie looked like she caught the canary “Well... If you want us to keep this secret... You've got to come play with us in the music room more often!”

Millicent just rolled her eyes at the whole thing and crossed her arms. Really, all this drama over nothing. Still, she couldn't let her girl Pinkie down now.

“Yeah!” She said. ”Or else we'll tell the whole school that Daphne can laugh. Seriously Daphne, you really need to de-clench.”

“I need to... What?”

“Relax! Live a little! This stupid school is probably the only chance you've got, and here you are treating it like some political function. It's weird!”

“Is that what this is all about?” Pinkie asked. “Yeah, that is pretty weird Daphne.”

“But... My parents taught me... That I was always on display.”

“Of course you are!” Pinkie shouted. “So let's give 'm a show!” She waved her hands in the air and popped some confetti from her wand.

The gesture made Daphne smile.

xxx

“Milly? Do you think that was the first time Daphne really laughed?”

“I don't know Pinkie I just wanna sleep.”

“Okay. Goodnight Milly!”

“Goodnight Pinkie.”

Pinkie thought about it for a long time before she fell asleep. Daphne must have held back her own laughter for a long long time. For some reason the thought made her deeply sad.

xxx

Borgin was adding a fine layer of dust on his displays to give them that authentic look. Most of these idiots would buy anything if it had a bit o' dust on it and you called it dark.

'Oh no, sir it's a dark set of gobstones. Practically ancient this is.' He shook his head. Seriously some people...

Not that is shop didn't carry any dark objects. Of course it did, but they were generally bought by people in the know as it were. Like his next customer.

“Good evening mister Parkinson. What can I do for you today?”

“I'd like to sell this necklace.” He placed it on the counter for Borgin to inspect.

Borgin took some glassware out of his desk and inspected the presented item on display..

“Hm, interesting...Bismuth...” He tried to scratch the metal with his nail. “...Obviously enchanted...”

Mister Parkinson did not respond. He just let Borgin get on with things.

“I can give you one galleon for this.”

“Done.” Mister Parkinson said to the surprise of Borgin.

Normally people haggled more with him.

Probably stolen then. He'd have to keep the item in storage for a while till the heat died down. Oh well, it was still a good deal.

Mister Parkinson took his gold and left in a hurry.

Borgin wished that all transactions were this easy. He went behind the back and hung the necklace in a cabinet. He'd deal with it later.

Chapter 17: Christmas!

Snow was falling lazily out of the sky. The winter holidays were almost here. Children were eagerly boarding the Hogwarts Express, impatient to get home and be with their families.

Hermione was looking out the window of her booth feeling melancholy. She wondered if she should just read a book when music was heard in the halls.

Suddenly Pinkie kicked down her door. She was wearing weird sunglasses and she had her beatbox on her shoulder blasting some loud contemporary music.

“Hermione!” She bellowed. “Meet the entourage!” She pointed at Millicent and Blaise and introduced him.

Hermione's little booth was suddenly crowded, though she didn't really mind. Shaking hands with Blaise, they watched Pinkie put her beatbox on the little table.

Pinkie plopped down next to Hermione. “So, whatcha gonna do for Christmas?”

“Oh, you know, just standard family stuff.” Hermione was actually rather looking forward to meeting her parents again. She missed them a lot and she couldn't wait to tell them all about magic and her new friends. They would be so proud of her!

The whole troll adventure might not go over so well though...

Millicent butted her out of her musings by stating that her family didn’t celebrate Christmas. Instead they we're going to celebrate a magical Yuletide.

Sniffing out something new to learn, Hermione eagerly requested an explanation.

Blaise, who ran in both circles as it were, explained that there really wasn't a lot of difference between the two. There was singing, sharing food and of course family meetings. What was different for the magicals were certain rituals. Like the virgin sacrifices and baby eating.

“Haha, you're hilarious.” Millicent said sarcastically as she gave him a shove.

Pinkie started laughing at Hermione's expression. She was sure that for a second there, Hermione believed him.

“Don't worry Hermione.” Pinkie said as she wrapped an arm around her. “I'm sure they only sacrifice the ugly ones.”

Hermione smiled at the implied compliment.

Pinkie released the embrace and started humming deck the halls. Mostly because it referenced Yule.

The tune was quite infectious and Millicent started hitting her thigh on the beat. Pinkie smiled when she realized that someone was joining in. She didn't leave it at humming any more and started singing the lyrics as well.

“Lala la la laaa la la la la. 'Tis the season to be jolly.”

Hermione wanted to join in so bad. She remembered when Harry just got up and danced on their last train ride and decided to throw caution in the wind.

“Don we now our gay apparel! La LA LA-”

Pinkie and Millicent slapped their hands on their ears. Their faces contorted in agony since they were closest to the onslaught.

Hermione, as it turns out, could not sing. It sounded a bit like someone was choking a crow... Off beat, off key and way too loud.

Everybody in the booth burst out in laughter, accept for Hermione of course. She shrank in her seat in embarrassment. Memories from her old school flooded her brain like a flashback. Bullying sure, but also the memories when she tried to sing for the first time.

The teacher asked her if maybe she wanted to rest her vocal cords for a moment as the entire class pointed and laughed at a small Hermione. How the same nervous teacher had her parents come over and politely requested of them that maybe they could instil in Hermione, that perhaps she should read a book during singing times? Maybe?

Hermione woke up from her fugue state by another hug from Pinkie. “It's okay Hermione.” she said. “I suck at magic and Blaise sucks at... Actually I don't know what he sucks at.”

Pinkie released Hermione from her hug. “Blaise, what do you suck at?”

“Nothing, I am perfect in every conceivable way. Humble as well.” He said in the most deadpan way he could.

Millicent laughed and gave him a another shove. “He sucks at potions for one. I have to chop his ingredients for him most of the time.”

“And I still say that slicing and dicing are the same thing.”

This felt a little different to Hermione then the laughter during her old school days. It felt like these people were trying to cheer her up. It was actually kind of nice. She already knew that she couldn't sing. It was an old hurt that maybe, finally, got a little band-aid.

The rest of the train ride was filled with silly games and tomfoolery. Hermione would read to the others from her book.

It turned out she was really good at doing the voices of the evil characters.

xxx

Daphne was bored. She sat in a booth with Theo, Draco and Pansy and she was so very bored. They were talking about which of their servants could grovel the best. They loved a good grovelling.
Truth was Daphne used to love a good grovelling as well. Nowadays she just felt so… different from them. It just wasn’t fun any more. She hated that she felt this way. Why couldn’t she just get over things and accept that this was how the world is?

“Ugh Daphne, what’s with you? You’re being so weird lately.”

“I don’t know. I guess I need a holiday.”

“Hear, hear.” Theo said. “We all could use time with our families.”

Daphne smiled wanly.

The rest of the train ride felt like a real slog.

When the train finally arrived at Kings Cross and all it’s passengers oozed out onto the platforms, she spied Pinkie hugging and laughing with an entire troupe of people. She recognized the one who was probably Maddie patting her on her head.

Daphne felt strangely envious.

xxx

Pinkie woke up early to make breakfast. Boy, had she missed this! She raced downstairs quietly, like a true pink baking ninja should.

Her old trusty oven was waiting impatiently. Well, technically it was probably just sitting there, but really, who cares?

“Christmas breakfast is the most important breakfast of the year.” She whispered to no one in particular.

She grabbed the flour. She grabbed the sugar. She grabbed some eggs. It was time to get to work.

xxx

Children ran down the stairs well before it was a sensible time to do so. The smell however, was irresistible.

It was a smell that was deeply missed in Happy Oaks. The smell of freshly baked breads, cakes and pies.

Some of the younger children ogled the fancy table set with all manner of Christmas paraphernalia.

Their were chocolate pine trees with coconut snow, a really big piece of stollen, which was a German holiday bread filled with raisins and marzipan, heavily dusted with powdered sugar to give it that Christmassy feel, and a simple orange pie.

Pinkie was just about done. She wiped her brow with the side of her oven mitts and placed the last piece, a simple round bread, on the table.

She was about to ask if someone wanted to call everyone downstairs but Macie was way ahead of her.

“Breakfast!” She yelled up the stairs.

A small earthquake rumbled once more through the little orphanage as countless feet big and small eagerly found their way to the dinner table.

“Surprise!” Pinkie shouted as she put the finishing touches on her work.

Maddie who was still quite sleepy was impressed. “You know, Christmas is usually celebrated with a dinner.”

“Yes! But then it wouldn't be a surprise.”

Maddie smiled and gave the girl a hug and kissed her on top of her head. “I’m glad you’re back Pinkie.”

The rest of the group looked at them expectantly.

Pinkie wrestled out of Maddie's loving embrace with a smile. “Let's eat!”

The children took their seats in chaotic fashion like usual and started feasting. Pinkie told them about all the new friends she's made and adventures she's had. Gracie told Pinkie about her terrarium which was really starting to look like something special. Rodger was a lucky newt.

Iris meanwhile was getting progressively better at reading due to the constant tutelage of Maddie and the older kids.

Duncan was allowed to try-out at the Manchester United junior football team. He had a real chance at going pro if he played his cards right.

Sophie and Alfie had become attached at the hip. At first Maddie was a little scared about how this would play out. Sophie at started to rain in her language instead of Alfie learning more bad words... He still learned some bad words though he was clever enough not to let Maddie hear them.

All the other kids told their stories as well. It was a lovely rowdy morning at Happy oaks. During all the excitement the children had completely forgotten that there were presents to unpack.

xxx

“Wake up Harry! We've got presents!”

Ron poked Harry on his side and ran away. Harry slowly rose. He never got any presents, he’d rather have another hour of sleep.

Rubbing his eyes, he made his way out of bed to follow Ron. His excitement was quite infectious though, and when Harry found his way to the tree he saw that he actually did have presents.

Overjoyed but also slightly confused, he wondered who could've sent him them to him. He grabbed one at random and tore open the package eagerly, like he'd seen Ron do.

It was a bright red sweater with a big H on it. When he turned to Ron he found him holding one as well. His had a big R on. Harry looked questioningly at him.

“They're from my mum.” Ron said. “She must've sent you one when I said we were mates.”

Harry looked at the sweater and was filled with warmth. He removed his pajamas and put the sweater on. It was a perfect fit. He wondered how she got his measurements.

'Magic.' He thought.

There were more presents underneath that tree and went for a small one this time. This one had Pinkie written all over it, what with the amount of glitter and stickers.

He unwrapped it just as quickly. A shower of confetti popped out of the little box. A similar pop was heard from Ron's direction. He got something from Pinkie as well.

Inside the little present was a small box of coloured pencils, paper and a note.

Some paper and some colours too
Use them in a quiet hour
I hope they'll be good to you
So you won't be dour

Happy Christmas Harry!

-P

He never had his own art supplies before. This was really something! Sure, he had used some at school but they were never his. Time at the Dursleys would certainly be more bearable with this. He thanked Pinkie in his head.

He felt guilt ripple through him when he realized that he didn’t give Pinkie anything.

“Hedwig, to me!”

The owl looked at him like he was an idiot.

“What? Didn't that sound cool?”

“You sounded like a pillock mate.” Ron was holding his own art supplies: Watercolour paints and a brush. “What did you get?”

“Pencils and paper.”

“Neat. I’ve never had muggle toys before. Wanna share?”

“Sure!”

The other presents replaced the guilt for the moment. He would send something to Pinkie and the others tonight somehow.

He scratched Hedwig on her crown as she leaned into it.

Harry threw Ron another present with his other hand. This one from Hermione which meant that it was probably a book. He unpacked his own present. Yup, it was a book as well.

“Quidditch through the ages.” He said aloud.

“The full unedited history of the Chudley Cannons.” Ron echoed. “Oh that’s cool!”

He started rifling through it's pages and smiled at the pictures. He'd read it later, for now there were more presents to unpack.

Harry grabbed another fluffy feeling one. Was it another sweater? He tore the paper apart. A strange silvery substance fell out of the package. It felt odd to the touch, like dry water.

Ron's attention switched to Harry when he saw he got something special.

“That's an invisibility cloak. They're really rare!”

Harry wrapped the cloak around himself and marvelled at his floating head.

“This is great! Here, you try it.”

Harry draped the cloak around Ron's shoulders and laughed when he saw Ron's expression. He pointed at a little note on the remaining packaging.

Of course, Harry couldn't see that so he pointed with his head instead.

“It came with a note. I wonder who send it?”

Picking up the note, Harry began to read it aloud.

Your father left this in my possession before he died.

It is time it was returned to you.

Use it well.

It was confusion that set the stage of Harry's initial reaction. Who was this person? And how did they know his dad?

There were more questions coming and going inside his mind but before he could give them shape Ron snapped him out of his musings.

“That's it?” Ron asked as peered over Harry's shoulder.

“Yeah.”

“No idea who it's from?”

“Nope”

“...Huh, Weird.”

xxx

Harry had just finished his letters to the people who gave him gifts. He had sent a big box of chocolate frogs to Hermione. He was sure she could appreciate his little joke.

Pinkies present was a lot harder though. Candy wouldn't really work if your recipient could just make their own. Instead he had owl-ordered a bright green jump-rope and a squirt gun. She seemed like an active sort of girl. He hoped that she would like them.

“Are you done?” Ron asked impatiently. They were going to explore the castle underneath the invisibility cloak. There were probably loads of secret passages and rooms to discover.

“Yeah, let's get going!”

The halls of Hogwarts were a lot less welcoming in the dark. It was eerily quiet now that most of the students had left for the holidays. The occasional ghost floating through the walls would not reduce the sense of mystery in the air.

They first explored the restricted section in the library. There was no Madam Pince there tell them they couldn’t.

Now that they were there though the place really wasn’t all that exciting just more random books. Harry grabbed one at random from the shelf and it suddenly started screaming at him.

He was startled into dropping the blasted thing.

“Who’s there?!”

It was the voice of mister Filch, the school caretaker.

Harry grabbed the still screaming book and slammed it shut. It was still fighting back when Harry put it back where it came from. Ron grabbed the invisibility cloak from Harry’s shoulder and draped them over them both.

Just in time. Mister Filch had rounded the corner. His heavy breathing seemed loud as he squinted through the darkness.

Harry and Ron held their breath. Mister Filch raised his lantern above his head.

“...Bloody ghosts. Come misses Norris.”

“Mrr-ow.” The cat meowed as it stared directly into their direction. The man walked off but the cat set there for a moment, before it too decided to go.

Harry exhaled from underneath the cloak “Fuckin’ hell.”

“That was wicked.”

Harry turned around incredulously to find Ron smiling. The expression on each others face had them both laughing.

xxx

Later that night Harry just couldn't seem to get any sleep. There were still many questions about the cloak he would’ve liked answered.

Ron was snoring loudly again and Harry used a silencing charm almost without thought.

Hold on. If he’d cast a silencing charm on himself as he was wearing the invisibility cloak. He would be pretty much undetectable! Harry opened his eyes wide. Sleep would definitely not come now. He cast a silencing charm on himself and got out of bed.

He threw the cloak over his head and went down the stairs. When he looked outside the Gryffindor common room he saw snow falling softly on the school grounds.

It was really beautiful to see the snow over the forbidden forest in the night. He almost wanted to go outside and explore some more, but clearer heads prevailed.

Instead he decided to just roam around the castle. It was cold enough inside it, to go outside would be crazy.

He had a strange sort of sadness as he walked through the dark halls. Harry imagined that this must be what a ghost would feel like…. Thinking about the dead would inevitably lead to thoughts of his parents.

He wondered what sort of mischief his father would get into with an invisibility cloak. Would he peak on girls in the shower? Raid the kitchens perhaps? Honestly, Harry didn’t understand what the appeal could be about watching people shower, but stealing food made a lot of sense to him.

He once again felt a sense of gratitude for whomever gave him the cloak and was about to turn back when he saw a light coming from an abandoned classroom. Carefully he opened the door and peered inside.

Headmaster Dumbledore appeared to be staring at his own reflection in a mirror mumbling something. It was strange to say the least and in that moment, too Harry, he seemed very old.

Making his way into the room trying not to disturb the air, Harry tried to see what made this mirror so special.

“That is a very impressive silencing charm Harry.” Dumbledore said as he turned towards Harry’s general direction. His eyes seemed to meet Harry’s own but only for moment before they drifted off.

Harry gasped, though the charm prevented any sound from being heard. He lifted the cloak from his head. “How did you know it was me?” He asked as he lifted the spell and before he realized that it might have been rude to just question the headmaster like that.

Dumbledore smiled. “Well, when you give someone an invisibility cloak, no doubt they would want to give it a spin.” He turned back towards the mirror.

“You sent it to me?”

“Hm-hmm. I meant to give it to you earlier in the year but… I’m afraid I was rather busy with other things and it has since slipped my mind. Christmas then, would make for a good excuse... I’d appreciate it if you could keep that between us Harry. Can’t be seen giving away invisibility cloaks willy-nilly.”

Harry laughed and tried to gather his thoughts. It didn’t seem like he was in trouble. The headmaster seemed strangely contemplative and willing to answer his questions. He looked at the mirror.

“This is no ordinary mirror is it.”

“Indeed not. It is called the mirror of Erised. Let me give you a hint to it’s function.” Dumbledore found himself in teaching mode and enjoying an interested audience. “The happiest man alive would gaze upon it’s polished silver and see only himself.”

Harry thought it through as he looked upon the lettering curving around it’s top. The word Erised registered in his mind. When he saw the word on the mirror he made the connection.

“Desire... The mirror shows us what we want?”

“Ten points to Gryffindor. Our deepest, most desperate desire, laid bare.”

Harry swallowed audibly. “Do… Do you think I could have a peak?”

The headmaster looked pained for a moment but then acquiesced. “I suppose with myself present it can’t do much harm. Go on, look.”

The mirror seemed to shimmer as Harry stepped in front of it. At first he saw only his reflection but then slowly he saw a scene starting to unravel. An older man who looked a lot like himself draped the invisibility cloak over Harry’s shoulders and made the universal sign for silence.

A woman with red hair came down the stairs and got startled by a younger Harry. The woman reprimanded him with equal measure of annoyance and amusement to the absolute delight of the older man.

Harry touched the glass. “Are… Are these my parents?” He found it hard to look away from the homely images that the mirror was showing him.

“If that is what you see, they are.”

“...Wow...”

“Powerful stuff is it not? To be confronted with what you always wanted?”

“Yeah… Why is it here? Is it yours?”

“No Harry, I borrowed it from a friend at the Department of Mysteries. Through lucky happenstance it is no longer needed and will be returned tomorrow.”

A strange smile set on Dumbledore’s features. “This is probably the last time I will ever see them.”

“It.”

“….Hmm? Oh right, of course, it… Let that be a lesson to you Harry. Never get too attached to an unattainable dream and forget to live.”

The finality of Dumbledore’s words stung Harry more then he thought they would. He knew he wouldn’t ever meet his parents but to see them so alive and whole...

Harry let Dumbledore throw a cloth over the mirror. “Now, I feel it is time for us to catch our own forty-winks before dawn arrives.”

“I’m not in trouble?”

“Far be it for me to punish a young man for his nighttime musings and wanderings. Especially on these auspicious days. Just try to keep them to a minimum. I would hate for Minerva to lose sleep over it.”

Harry nodded at the headmaster, reapplied a silencing charm and returned to the Gryffindor dorms. His dreams were filled with simple and wondrous things.

When he awoke he found that he’d been crying.

xxx

Daphne was alone in her room plucking at her violin. The scene on the train station platform kept racing through her mind.

She felt lonely…

Such foolishness! Just because her family wasn’t much for public displays of affection, or any kinds of affection really… That didn’t mean that she should be feeling this way.

Twang! A string broke on her violin.

“Jibbles.”

The house elf appeared with a wooden spoon in his hand and a chef’s hat on. He looked a little annoyed as far as elves would look annoyed at their masters.

“Yes, young mistress?”

Daphne showed him the violin. Jibbles fixed it with a snap of his fingers and popped away.

No, Daphne would have the absolute best time tonight and she’d show everybody that she would be just fine without any such sentiments.

xxx

The dinner party was in full swing. A number of important people were present and enjoying the kitchen labours of Jibbles. The old elf could really cook up a storm.

As is tradition several offers were made to buy him and just like tradition those offers were politely rebuffed.

Daphne was wearing her blue dress and did her best to look pretty with the other children. They were supposed to be seen and not heard after all. Currently she was trying to hold a conversation with Theo.

But really, she was just feigning interest in his pontifications. Goodness the boy was dull. Very similar to his father in that way, he could put the most debilitated of insomniacs to sleep as well, what with his dull pompous drone.

As she took a sip from her mulberry juice, she took a look across the table towards her mother. She could tell that she was trying to impress their guests with her wit and charm. She was obviously succeeding.

Her father was talking with a small group of other men. No doubt about some business or other. People would always be in need of the services that their family provided. They held greenhouses with rare plants for potion ingredients and cooking supplies.

Daphne was actually quite certain that her family also dealt in some more shady things but her father always cut her off when she even implied it.

She sighed, guess the party wasn't going to be exciting after all.

Her mother caught her eye. “Daphne darling. Why don’t you play something for us on your violin?”

Daphne felt some hope returning in her heart. Perhaps if she did good she might actually feel some of that Yule warmth she was craving.

Jibbles came and handed her the violin. She decided to play something happy and upbeat to try and get someone to dance. She could see some people starting to shake from side to side a little. But no one broke their composure.

The music finished, the moment passed and everything stayed the same.

It was terribly frustrating to want something that you can’t even really describe from your parents and peers, and not getting it.

Her eyes landed on her sister. Her biggest rival…

Memories flashed through her mind of when they were younger. Astoria would always follow her around, trying to imitate Daphne, driving her completely spare.

Funny, how she now looks upon that quite fondly.

Their parents would always compliment Daphne and deride Astoria. It used to make her feel good to know that she was the best. She never questioned the logic, but know she felt a little like a puppet dancing to the tune of her parents.

Did they do it to make Daphne callous? Or to motivate Astoria?

She couldn’t say that it didn’t work. False modesty be damned, she was a very capable witch…

So... what if she’d change the rules a little? What if it the Greengrass daughters would team up?

xxx

The guests had left and Astoria had fled towards her room. She was tired and bored. All she did the entire party was sit in the corner.

Jibbles would try to cheer her up by smuggling her sweets underneath the table. It worked to some degree.

Still, she was a little angry as well. Why wasn’t she allowed to play some music?

She knew the reason of course. It was because Daphne could play it better and they wanted to impress. Astoria wasn’t stupid.

She sighed and grabbed a nearby comic book. She loved ‘the adventures of Marty Miggs, the Mad Muggle’. Though she’d never met a muggle before.

Huh, maybe she should try and fi-

Someone knocked on her door. That was weird. Her parents would just walk in and she didn’t know who else it could be.

“Come in!”

The door opened and it was her sister. She was back from Hogwarts and she’d almost forgotten about her already. If she was truly honest with herself she didn’t miss her much.

Her sister had grown aloof these last years, probably because of the pressures of being the heir, but that didn’t dull the hurt any.

Daphne sat next to her on the bed. “The adventures of Marty Miggs, the Mad Muggle.” She read the title from the cover. “Do you still like that drivel?”

“It’s not drivel! It’s funny!”

Astoria expected Daphne to sneer at her or something but instead she looked away.

“...I’m sorry... I didn’t come here to fight.”

“...”

They sat together on the bed awkwardly. Astoria, trying to figure out what her sister wanted and Daphne, trying to do the same thing.

“I thought that we could play together sometime.” Daphne finally said. “Music, o-or maybe reading a book.”

That came a little out of the blue for Astoria. “Why?”

“… I don’t really know. Should I need a reason to want to spend time with my sister?”

“You do.” Astoria said as she pointed in Daphne's direction.

Daphne’s face went through quite a few expressions before settling on aloofness. “Fine.” She stood up from the bed. “I guess I'll lea-”

“Wait... I suppose maybe tomorrow... We could try out new hairstyles or something?”

Daphne smiled. “Yes well, that sounds quite entertaining actually.”

“Well, okay then.”

Astoria stood from the bed as well. They hugged like two people who were very unaccustomed to hugging.

It was the best feeling ever.

Author's Note

Some chapters just won't come out right.

Chapter 18: Back to School

No crying this time, but still a sense of goodbye when Pinkie sat on her trunk at Kings Cross station. She was hugging Alfie, as she sneakily put a sweet in his pocket. He was growing up so fast!

She passed the barrier with a hop, skip and a jump, to find the obvious silhouette of Millicent Bullstrode close by. Millicent must have flooed in early since she was munching on some Kentucky fried chicken.

“Muggles are awesome.” Millicent said as Pinkie sat next to her.

Pinkie already knew that of course, but still wondered how Millicent came to this insight.

“I know right! Look what I got for Christmas!”

She pulled out a bright green jump rope from her pocket. “I don't think wizards would invent the jump-rope.”

Millicent had no idea what she was looking at. It just looked like a long bright-green rope with some handles. She wondered what the jump bit in the word was used for. She ate the last of her chicken.

Millicent was about to clean her fingers on her robe, realized she's a witch, and cleaned them with a spell instead. “Come on let's go on the train!”

xxx

With much enthusiasm, Millicent started telling Pinkie about her Yule.

Apparently there was a party planned at the Greengrasses, but Millicent and her sister didn't go. The Bullstrode elders instead decided to go alone, since Mildred felt a little under the weather.

Turns out that her sister was just pretending, and she basically kidnapped Millicent along in an adventure. They went to a muggle theme park.

They had a special Christmas celebration there, and the fun lasted until well after dark. It was the first time she went on a rollercoaster ride. She still had the photo in a secret drawer in her desk at home. Her sister was screaming hysterically, while Millicent looked manic with excitement.

Best Yuletime ever.

Pinkie listened to Millicent story with rapt attention. Living vicariously through her friends adventure, and asking questions at the appropriate intervals. They swapped stories about which rides were the best. Pinkie told Millicent about a ride she was in once, that actually let you hang underneath the rails.

That sounded simply amazing to Millicent and she really wanted to go.

The two kept swapping stories when Pinkie noticed Daphne looking in on their booth. She had her hand on the handle but then she was called away. Not long afterwards, Hermione joined them.

She stowed her trunk right next to Millicent’s and Pinkie’s and sat down.

“Chocolate frog anyone?” Hermione said. “Harry has send me so many and I don’t think I can eat them all.”

Well, suffice it to say that the other two needed no further prompting. Pinkie and Millicent held their hands out and each got quite a bit more then they bargained for.

The room got quiet as the girls were munching on chocolate frogs. Hermione's card collection had grown exponentially. She was only missing Helga Hufflepuff, Morgan le Fay, Schtoltenheim Reinbach III and Nicholas Flamel. She really liked the educational value of these little cards. Ron would probably like to trade some of them with her when they got back at Hogwarts.

xxx

The train stopped at Hogsmeade as it had done countless times before. It’s passengers stepping on the platform happily.

Hagrid was there to guide the first years to the carriages and Pinkie was glad that they didn’t have to ride the boats again. It was getting rather nippy and snowy and a plunge in the black lake wouldn’t do her any favours.

“The candy didn’t work. He’s still big.” Pinkie said to Hermione.

“Yeah, I did some research actually. Turns out he’s a half-giant.”

Millicent butted in. “Well of course he's a half-giant. Look at the size of him.”

The girls reached the carriages that would take them to Hogwarts.

Pinkie saw them being pulled by skinny horse like beings with big leathery wings.

They glowed with a very soft pale light, almost imperceptibly, and looking at them gave Pinkie a conflicting feeling of both otherworldliness, and homeliness.

She eagerly ran ahead and petted one on the snout.

“Uhh Pinkie, what are you doing?” Millicent asked as Hermione was standing behind her with one leg already inside the carriage, eyebrow raised.

“I'm petting the horsey, see?” She glided her hand through thin air.

Hermione and Millicent shared a look. Hermione stepped out of the carriage again. “There's nothing there, Pinkie.”

“Yes, there is.”

Millicent stepped up. “No, there isn't.”

“Yes there is, look.” Pinkie held a cupcake out to the animal.

The the eyes of Hermione and Millicent the cupcake disappeared in to thin air in two distinct bites.

“Magical Merlin!” Millicent gasped as she jumped backwards.

Pinkie giggled. A different horse next to Millicent started sniffing her hair and nibbling on it.

Paralyzed with fear Millicent implored Pinkie to do something about this with her eyes. The creature seemed unfazed by the frightened reactions of this new two-legged curiosity and continued it's exploration. “Sniff-snuff.”

Millicent could feel the breeze of it's breathing without actually hearing it's breath. It was very disconcerting.

Pinkie distracted the scaly-horse thing by petting it’s mane and whispering in it’s ear.

“She says your hair smells like pine-needles.”

“Th-th-that’s nice.” Millicent looked scared.

Pinkie asked the winged horse to stop playing with Millicent's hair and the creature reluctantly complied with a short whinny. To Pinkie it sounded like an ordinary horse noise. To Millicent and Hermione however, it sounded like a ghostly distorted sound echoing from somewhere very distant.

“Can we please go in the carriage now?” Millicent asked.

Hermione nodded and opened the door. Most of the other students seemed to be in their carriages already.

Pinkie petted the horse once more on the snout before entering the carriage as well. The ride on the way back to school was filled with questions from Hermione and Millicent. Why could Pinkie see them but they couldn’t?

Hermione swore to find some answers.

When she found them, later that evening in the library. She decided against inquiring on where and when Pinkie saw someone die.

xxx

Over the next couple of months Pinkie settled in a pleasant routine. Classes were helping her improve her magic very slowly, but improve it did. The wingardium leviosa spell worked reasonably well, not as good as most, but still pretty well.

Transfiguration and defence improved slowly too. Mostly because Dumbledore and McGonagall made the lessons fun and interesting. Something a certain spectral teacher could learn a thing or two from.

Pinkie usually slept like a rock through history of magic... It was rather nice actually.

Quidditch practices came and went. Flying was fantastic and soon she found herself winning more and more seeker battles. The limiting factor was her broom. Pinkie didn't really mind it herself, Quidditch was just for fun after all, but her team disagreed.

They found solace in the fact that Harry, who was found to be an excellent seeker in his own right, didn't have a decent broom either.

That all changed on the day that Harry had his first match. A big package was flown to him during breakfast. It had to be carried by four owls and it’s shape implied it’s contents.

It was a brand new broom. A nimbus 2000.

A high end broom made by the Nimbus Racing Broom company. Filled to the twig with the latest and greatest in aviation enchantments, comforting charms, control trims and flight stabilizers.

It was the best broom available on the consumer market. Professor Snape didn't miss the wink that the deputy headmistress shared with Harry. They were rather obvious.

The Gryffindors won the next match against Slytherin to Harry's delight.

Snape made sure that the training of the new Slytherin seeker was expedited.

That meant more hours on the pitch... Which was awesome! Pinkie still hadn't played a real match yet though.

She was being toted as the Slytherin secret weapon, even though they knew she wasn’t any better then Terrance, they knew that the mystery could add to their advantage.

Still, Hogwarts wouldn’t be Hogwarts if there weren’t some adventures to be had. Pinkie heard of just such an adventure when rumours started flying about Harry sneaking out of Hagrid’s hut with a baby dragon.

When she later asked the Gryffindors about it, they denied it ever happened. Pinkie didn’t relent however, and soon she heard the whole tale.

Hagrid had won a dragon egg off of a mysterious, turban wearing stranger. The stranger seemed friendly enough, being particularly interested in how the grounds of Hogwarts were secured. Apparently he worked in security as well.

When the egg was hatched they quickly discovered that dragons grow very fast and that wood is indeed very flammable.

It was with great sadness in his heart that Hagrid had to let the little fellow go. The thought that Norbert had a lot of other dragon friends to play with, did lift his spirits.

On a less happy note, Pinkie observed a scary change in the other Slytherins. Draco, Pansy, Theo, and to a lesser extent; Crabbe and Goyle.

They had turned very cold towards her. On the outside they were civil, but on the inside it was like there was nothing at all.

Like she shouldn't exist.

During these times Pinkie, Daphne and Millicent spend a lot of hours in the music room. Goofing around and trying to find the silliest instrument that the room provided. It did a lot to cheer up Pinkie and in truth, the other two needed that too.

There was a lot of laughter in these moments. Daphne's power-honks as well. In here she could really let loose.

Of course Daphne never really interacted with the other girls in public. Trying to pretend to be as aloof as the others was starting to seriously grate on her.

Life was meandering this way like a river, until one day...

xxx

The great hall was crowded. The end of term exams were looming and many students had their books out for study. Some of them were eating while others were just staring into space or discussing a particular hard subject with each other.

Daphne was standing near the entrance.

On one side of the Slytherin table she saw Pinkie with her friends, on the other, Draco and his. The contrast between the two couldn’t be more different. Pinkie shared the table with people from other houses. There was Lisa Turpin from Ravenclaw, Hermione from Gryffindor, some girl from Hufflepuff she didn't know and, of course, Blaise and Millicent.

It was a rowdy bunch.

Meanwhile at the other side of the table it was a much more dignified affair. The pureblood children ate daintily with their books closed until their food was finished. Haughty disdain prevalent on their faces.

She suddenly felt like she stood upon a mountain ridge. If she fell down one side there was no way of returning to the other. How was she supposed to know which side was right?

In the end she decided to follow her heart.

“Can I sit here?”

Blaise kicked the chair opposite him.

“Have a seat.”

Pinkie raised her head from the book she had pretended to fall asleep in. “Oh, hey Daph. Take a load off. We’re pretending to be pretending to be studying.”

“...What? Don’t you mean just ‘pretending to study?’”

Some of the other children started to chuckle.

“I said what I said.” Pinkie said sagely.

Daphne was well acquainted with Pinkie’s shenanigans at this point so she got her transfiguration homework out.

“Well, I hope you don’t mind that I’ll do some actual studying?”

Lisa fumbled with her glasses.“Most of us are actually doing that.”

“Speak for yourself.” Millicent said. “I’ve seen enough books to last me a lifetime.”

Hermione looked up. She’d never heard such blasphemy in her life. “The books did nothing wrong!”

The group stared at her for a moment.

“Sorry, force of habit.”

Thing settled into a pleasant groove like this. Sometimes people would ask a question about a subject. Sometimes people just complained about something. It was at this time that an owl swooped in and landed in front of Millicent.

She presented the leg to her that had a small note attached. Millicent, not really knowing what to expect, took the note and read it.

It was a note from her mother.

The others could she her expressions change from happy, to sad, to something undefinable, to resigned in rapid succesion.

“My sister is getting married.” She said tonelessly.

“Hurray!” Pinkie popped confetti from her wand and jumped up, yet the mood around the table wasn’t very joyful, rather it was thoughtful.

“...Hurray?” She said as she sat back down.

Millicent was staring at the letter like it she was tasting something bitter.

“...Why didn’t she tell me?”

Pinkie saw the signs of someone about to cry. She stood up and walked around the table to give Milly a hug. “Who’s she marrying?”

Millicent had to look at the letter again to make sure. “Some guy called Eric Flint… Ugh, I’m gonna be related to Marcus.”

“So, why are you sad?”

“They don’t deserve her. And after the wedding… I’ll never see her again.”

“Oh silly, I’m sure it won't be that bad.”

Daphne, ever the realist, gave her two knuts, “Actually, it very well could be that bad. It all depends on the contract signed.”

Pinkie gave Daphne a look that shouted: ‘You’re not helping.’

“Then again your sister is very pretty and smart. I’m sure that she would have some say in who she will and won’t meet.”

Sadly, that did not have the desired effect. Millicent started to burst into tears.

“Stupid aristocratic codswallop! Why can’t we just be free?”

People could hear the outburst from across the room. They had created quite a scene. The other Slytherins didn’t appreciate it, but Millicent couldn’t care less.

With the letter clutched in her hand, she stormed her way towards the dormitories. She was going to write a strongly worded letter to everybody. The groom, her sister and her parents, could all expect some angry looking owls.

Pinkie had followed Milicent to their room, so Pinkie was within easy reach to borrow Owlicious.

“Now, listen here Owlicious. You keep pecking ‘em till they give you a letter. You hear me? I want answers. I want some, Merlin be flipped, respect!”

“Hoot!” Owlicious couldn’t quite make a salute but he sure tried.

Millicent shrunk the letters and tied them to his leg. “Go!”

He flew through the Hogwarts dungeons, up the stairs and straight out of an opened window. He had some angry pecking to do.

xxx

“Why did you sit with them?!” Pansy was irate. It was like she genuinely believed that she had a right to Daphne’s seating choices.

It was so obnoxious! Why hadn’t she noticed these things when she was younger?

“I thought it would be the smart thing to do.” Daphne said with an eye roll. “I’m sure you’ve noticed their group has started growing. I wanted to see what’s what.”

“Well… I don’t like it!”

“Excuse me?” Daphne gave Pansy a hard stare. It was extremely effective with those icy-blue eyes of hers. Pansy shrunk a little despite her best efforts.

“You seem to be labouring under the illusion, that I owe you some sort of explanation. That I am somehow beholden to you. Well, I do the things I do for my own reasons in my own ways. And I don’t owe you anything.”

“...You and your schemes. What are planning now?”

“That’s for you to find out.”

Really, there were no schemes.

So when Daphne saw them chuckle about Millicent, when she got her bad news from home, Daphne went to her room that night with a sense that these people really could sod right off.

Chapter 19: A Quarrel with Quirrel

Unicorn blood was losing it’s potency. It had to be tonight. Tomorrow he would be to weak. Slowly he crawled his way through the muck. The forbidden forest had lost it’s charm a long time ago.

One more unicorn then. Just one more. After that he would win and have it all, or he would be dead.

“I’m growing impatient with your whimpering, Quirrel.”

“...Yes master. We will have the stone tonight.”

xxx

Millicent was rampaging through the school like an angry bear. Scowling at anything and everything that came too close. Sometimes she kicked a random unsuspecting inanimate object.

Even the upper years learned to stay well enough away.

The replies she got from her letters weren't exactly heart warming. Some of them used flowery words, but what the messages boiled down to was, she was behaving like a spoiled brat, and she should really grow up.

Millicent's only real comfort was that, Owlicious gave them a good pecking.

Her sister's message was the most confusing. Millicent never asked her to get married. So why would she say she did it for her? It just wasn't fair!

“Graah!” Millicent kicked a suit of armour.

xxx

This required the big guns. At least three stories with different flavours each.

Pinkie was stumped. All regular cheering up techniques didn't have much effect. Millicent stayed grumpy.

It was understandable... It must feel like she was losing a loved one, and even worse, that she was powerless to stop it.

But it didn't excuse snapping at your friends.

Luckily, her friends understood. And because they understood, they collectively decided to do something about it.

They couldn't stop the marriage, that wasn't up to them, but they could give Millicent something to take her mind of things.

That was what this gathering was gonna be all about. It would have all of Milly's favourite stuff.

They were organizing when Blaise had gotten a good idea. They knew that she needed to vent. That's just how Millicent worked. So Blaise filled a bag with a bunch of hay that he got from Hagrid, and doodled Draco's face on it.

If nothing else, they knew Millicent would find it funny.

xxx

His disillusionment charm was second to none. Probably because he was so easily overlooked. Not after tonight though. After tonight, people will learn to fear the name Quirrines Quirrel.

He had found his way inside, that half-giant, half halfwit, was good for something at least. Slowly, and above all quietly, he made his way to the third floor. The Cerberus would be the first challenge, but he had now idea about what would follow.

Dumbledore wouldn’t be foolish enough to just let an artefact like the Philosopher’s stone be easily taken...

xxx

They had to find a way to lure Millicent into the music room. It was right after dinner, so she was probably somewhere quiet.

Daphne found her near the black lake, throwing pebbles.

“Good evening, Millicent. Would you like to play some music with me?”

Already slightly irate, and confused why Daphne of all people would ask such a thing, Millicent threw another pebble and sighed. “No thanks Daphne, I'm not in the mood.”

‘Well bugger.’ Daphne thought. ‘That’s that plan out the window.’

“You know...” She said as she sat down next to Millicent. “I’ve always...rather admired you.”

Millicent raised a sceptical eyebrow. She remembered the taunts when they were younger. The snide comments about her weight. The loneliness.

“Okay, maybe admired is too strong a word. I respected how difficult you made teasing you.”

“Great pep-talk.” Millicent threw another pebble in the lake.

Not her best work, Daphne had to admit. She threw a pebble as well.

This whole friendship thing was proving more difficult then previously anticipated. Especially now that she genuinely wanted to help Millicent. Sadly her pureblood educated mind drew a complete blank. She decided to just...talk

“Look.” She said. “These past few month with you and Pinkie were the best of my life.” Surprise filled her when Daphne realized the truth of those words.

Millicent couldn't suppress a cheeky grin despite her sullen mood.

“Yes, yes, pathetic I know.” Daphne said, trying to wave Millicent's grin away. ”So the least I could do, is try to get you out of this... funk.”

Intrigue filled Millicent's face. This must be unfamiliar ground for Daphne. She was curious where she would go with it.

Daphne continued undisturbed. “Now, me and the rest of our... misfit group, have arranged a 'surprise' party for you. Since I've obviously failed into luring you to the music room, would you be a dear and come with me anyway?”

Resigned, Millicent stood up.

“Do try to act surprised.” Daphne pleaded. “Who knows what Pinkie would do, if she knew that I told you.”

xxx

Millicent was greeted with a wall of noise and confetti.

“Surprise!” Pinkie shouted. “We've organized a party because we wanted to make you feel better.”

Marvelling at the decorations was unavoidable. There was just so much! Millicent was gawking at the shear amount of confetti that came falling from the ceiling. The amount of effort to do all this must've been staggering.

There was a big multi-storied cake sitting on the floor in the middle. It had four seats surrounding it, three of which had a musical instrument. The drum set was obviously meant to be Millicent's seat.

Idly, Millicent hit a cymbal when she noticed the punching bag. Although she was still feeling down, the sight of it made her smile regardless, and thankful for her friends.

She gave the bag an experimental hit. The bag bounced against the wall so Millicent could punch it again making the bag go faster and faster.

It was a pleasant zen-like experience, emptying her mind for a while.

“Wow Blaise, I guess your punching bag is a big hit!” Pinkie quipped with grin.

Blaise groaned and put his hand to his face. “That was terrible, Pinkie.”

Pinkie giggled.

Daphne meanwhile, was eyeing the towering cake hungrily. “Guys?” She pointed at the cake. “Shall we?”

Feeling no objections coming up, Millicent was eager herself for some of that cake.

Still… As Pinkie and Daphne were goofing around, trying to cheer her up, reality set in once more. With a deep sigh, Millicent wished there was just something she could do! But there just wasn’t.

She took a big bite out of her cake with a scowl… Stupid tasty cake.

Blaise looked at her with pity, which Millicent hated.

“What ’re you lookin’ at?”

“Someone miserable, I think.” He scooted his chair over and gave her a side hug. Daphne and Pinkie joined up as well.

“Wanna wreck some drums and get it out of your system?” Pinkie said. “Daphne and I have written a song!”

Millicent was a little mulish but acquiesced. She sat herself down behind the drums and the other girls took their designated seats as well. Pinkie used a glockenspiel, and Daphne had a guitar to play around with.

When she looked at Blaise however, he didn’t seem to have anything. “I’m just here to be a groupie and moral support.”

Two drum-sticks smacked together in a lackadaisical beat and then they started.

“Get up sit down-”

They burst into giggles. The beat didn’t match up, they completely mistimed their intro.

“Okay, let’s try that again!” Millicent started a fast, hard hitting solo. She just kept at it in an incredible tempo to really work up a sweat.

Pinkie and Daphne just let her do her thing.

After a while, Millicent slowed it down... down... down... until she came to a stop.

Daphne started plucking her guitar to show Millicent the rhythm they were going for.

Then Pinkie and Milly joined back in, and Daphne and Pinkie started singing.

Get up, sit down, move around like a king without a crown.
Losing your cool with some chums, doing long nights in the school.

No happy ending is near, so it's time to face the fear.
It's time to move, move along and make music on our own.

Ah – ah – ah - aah- ah
All on our own
Ah – ah – ah - aah- ah

Blaise started to clap along with a smile on his face. They were really good!

She's a simple hothead, with some issues she's been bred.
You wish the choice that was made is connected with some thread.

But what is done and is not is a very different game.
You have to sit down and try to stay sane and leave the blame.

Let's put this marriage to a tune.
To cheer you up is our aim.
Will you please accept this boon?

Ah – ah – ah - aah- ah
accept this boon.
Ah – ah – ah - aah- ah
Come sing along.
Ah – ah – ah - aah- ah

As Millicent was drumming, she realized that the song was really about her and her sister stuff. It was heart warming.

It's time to sing, sing along, time to make another song.
Bet you'd rather have your sister to come right every wrong.

Now we're left here with chords and piano on our own.
You have to sit down, don't cook your brain and go insane.

Let's put this marriage to a tune.
To cheer you up is our aim.
Will you please accept this boo-oo-oo-oon?

After that riveting buildup, Pinkie started on her patter solo.

It is really quite sad, that it hit you this bad.
I wish fate was more nice, not demanded such a price.
Would it be cool. If I feel sorry for you?
The earth turns around and round, to you it isn't bound.

You need a moment of insight.

And I hope this is it. We are tightly knit.
You're part of this skit. I know you have the grit.

Let's put this marriage to a tune.
To cheer you up is my aim.
Will you please accept this boon?

The song ended. Millicent sat staring at the cake with tears in her eyes.

“I'm sorry, you guys. I know I've been ...bitchy.”

That was the cue they needed for another group hug.

“I really love you guys a lot.”

“It's okay Milly.” Pinkie said. “We love you a lot too.”

Meanwhile Blaise was still sitting there, a bit stunned about what just happened.

xxx

It was late and Harry couldn’t sleep. He knew that the school year was coming to an end and that meant going back to the Dursleys. The prospect had hem feeling bleak.

This past year had Hogwarts has been absolutely amazing and he didn’t want it to end.

It was easy to forget his home-life when returning to hit seemed so far away. Now… Well, it wasn’t so distant.
Aimlessly he wandered the halls underneath his invisibility cloak, trying to find solutions to his problem.

Maybe he could stay at Hogwarts if he asked the headmaster. Or maybe he could stay with Hermione or Ron, although he didn’t want to be a burden.

Silently he trudged his way into an abandoned classroom, hoping to find a nice view of the grounds and maybe some peace of mind in one way or another...

xxx

‘Where is it?!’

The sun at long set over Hogwarts’ many spires.

‘Did he keep it in his office?’ His contact at Gringotts had been adamant that the stone hadn’t been returned to them.

Getting up into the office would be difficult. He couldn’t use the stairwell because of the gargoyle blocking the way. He could destroy it but that would be noisy.

No, better to find a way around. The outside window would be best. He could fly out using the to-

Someone moved passed him! Someone else was sneaking about invisible.

Perhaps he wasn’t the only one looking for the stone? Quirrel cast a spell to keep track of this invisible interloper, only for the spell to glance off.

At first it was a minor curiosity, but now it was interesting.

He cast another spell, on himself this time, to enhance his senses and set to follow this mysterious stranger.

It was easy, though he could tell that the person he was following was very good at sneaking. He was using a silencing spell on himself. It did nothing for his sense of smell however.

Very young and male.

Interesting.

Quirrel followed him in to an abandoned classroom.

xxx

Harry removed his cloak and stood in front of the window. The view outside was stunning, as it always was. The moon was very bright this night, making the black lake shimmer.

“Well, well, well, mister Potter... This must be divine providence.”

Turning around, Harry came face to face with professor Quirrel. Although he looked considerably worse for wear. He appeared to be... pealing for lack of a better word.

“What do you mean?” Harry asked instantly on guard. His old defense teacher did not inspire confidence in his current state.

Quirrel flicked his wrist and with a silent disarming spell removed Harry's wand from his person.

Momentarily stunned by the professor's quick movement, more because he always thought Quirrel was a bit of a dunce then anything else, Harry demanded his wand back.

“No, no, no, I think not mister Potter.” He said inching closer with his wand trained on Harry. “We're going to have ourselves a little chin-wag.”

He stood creepily close to Harry now.

“How was it done?”

“What?”

“Don't play games! You know what!”

Harry had no idea what the man was on about. He figured he might as well start talking to give himself time to think.

“So, there I was on my broom, when I saw the snitch right? And then the-”

“Crucio!”

It was a strange sense of slow-motion that caused him to dodge the spell that emerged from Quirrel's wand. Harry flew behind a desk. The spell missed Harry by inches and caused a nearby cabinet to explode.

Quirrel laughed. “Well done Harry, I knew there was more to you.”

His smile immediately disappeared “Imperio!”

Before the spell could reach Harry, he flipped the small desk he was hiding behind and used it as a makeshift shield.

The spell was less violent then the previous one, but it still caused the desk to shatter in a thousand pieces, showering Harry in debris.

Whatever it was that Quirrel wanted, Harry wasn't much inclined to give it him after that.

“Do you see now Harry? The extent of your weakness in front of me?”

With a flick of his wand Quirrel cleared the room. There was nothing standing between them now.

“So... Harry. How did yo-”

“Let me speak to the boy...” A raspy voice echoed through the room.

That was when things got weird. Quirrel removed his turban and turned around only for the back of his head to start speaking.

Harry couldn't keep his fascinated horror from his face.

“Yes Harry, do you see what I've become?”

“It's like staring at a particularly talkative boil.”

“Such insolence...”

“You asked.”

The head smiled indulgently “Yes... bravery. Your parents were brave as well, but they died all the same.”

Harry swallowed loudly and gritted his teeth.

“All those years ago. The greatest wizard of all time attacked the house of your progenitors, to remove the last resistance to his rule.”

With awkward, backward steps forward, Quirrel closed in on Harry.

“He was stopped and his body was destroyed. So what was it about you that caused it?”

The face on the back of Quirrel's head studied Harry intently.

“Hmm no, I don't think there is anything special about you at all...”

Realization dawned on the face. “Ah... It was your mother. She tricked me using herself as a sacrifice. Something I should have foreseen...”

“Kill the boy. He knows nothing of use.”

Professor Quirrel spun around and pointed his wand right between Harry's eyes.

“Avada ka-”

“Surprise!”

xxx

It was late and Pinkie was sneaking back to the Slytherin common room. The party lasted for a while yet after the song, but even then they couldn't finish all that cake.

Maybe three stories was a bit much.

Pinkie had shooed the three other Slytherins ahead. She had planned to retrieve some of her party paraphernalia and then place the cake in the common room.

No doubt that cake would be gone before breakfast, the following morning.

As she was sidling along the wall, cake in hand, like a cool ninja warrior. She heard raised voices, and really quite a clamor.

'Oh,' she thought. 'Maybe there's another party? I'm sure they would like some cake as well.'

Giggling at the fun she was about to create, she kicked down the door.

“Surprise!”

Startled out of his mind, Quirrel threw his wand in the air mid-cast. A green flash of light fizzled it's way towards Pinkie.

She dodged the spell on instinct with a yelp, but couldn't keep the cake from tumbling through the air.

It landed right on top of Quirrel.

Almost immediately, smoke started rising up from his body and sizzling noises could be heard.

Quirrel started screaming. It was a frightening sound with two different voices.

“I'm sorry professor! I didn't-”

Harry meanwhile, wasn't very sorry at all. Instead he was really quite livid and took this opportunity to run up to Quirrel and punch him.

He expected to feel resistance when he connected, but instead his hand went right through. As if the man was made out of sand.

Quirrel collapsed and Pinkie screamed as the man's body disintegrated.

“No! Bad cake. Bad cake!”

Harry was about to say something reassuring when a black foulness emerged from Quirrels corpse, flew right through Harry, and right out the window.

He lost consciousness before he hit the ground.

Pinkie grabbed him and tried to look for vital signs, even though she had no idea what she was doing.

“Medic!” She shouted. “MEDIC!”

She could be heard all the way down in Hogsmeade.

xxx

Harry awoke in the hospital wing. He was feeling incredibly drained and had half a mind to just turn around and go right back to sleep.

If only the hospital wing wasn't so busy.

Now, Harry knew that madam Pomfrey ran a tight ship. So what was all this racket?

Groggily, he tried to find his glasses when a pair of big calloused hands placed them on his head.

Hagrid was smiling at him. “Hello Harry! It is good to see you in one piece!”

Harry was a bit startled at Hagrid's volume. His head was aching and didn't much appreciate it. “Why are you shouting?”

“What?!” Hagrid shouted.

Upon closer inspection, Harry couldn't help but notice that Hagrid's ears were bleeding. Harry gestured to his ears.

“Oh right! Apparently there was some sort of magical mishap! Dumbledore said I should be here in case you woke up!”

A bored looking healer made his way towards Hagrid and put two ear drops in his ears.

“Ah, thank you. That's much better.” Hagrid said in a much more sensible volume.

Harry followed the healer with his eyes to notice a long line of students who also had bleeding ears.

Extra healers were imported from St Mungo's, Hagrid explained, to deal with the workload.

As Hagrid was about to ask how Harry was feeling, Dumbledore entered the hospital wing. Initially to talk with madam Pomfrey but when he noticed that Harry was awake he made his way to him.

“Ah Harry, it is good to see you back among the living.”

Hagrid stood up from his seat. “I better make sure all the critters are alright.”

“Thank you, Hagrid.” Dumbledore said.

“Bye Hagrid.” Harry waved him off.

Hagrid left the hospital wing with a wave of his own.

“So, another nighttime wandering?” Dumbledore said as he sat down with a gentle air. “Should we add insomnia to your list of symptoms?”

“No sir, I was just... exploring again I guess.”

“Indeed? Any particular reason?”

This was the moment. He could ask Dumbledore if he could stay here for the summer. He would want to know why of course.

Suddenly Harry's throat closed up.

“...No particular reason sir.”

Seconds ticked by as Dumbledore looked at Harry sadly. It appeared he was about to say something but then changed his mind.

“Pinkie told me you've had a run in with mister Quirrel?”

Harry explained what happened from his point of view.

“And you are absolutely certain that he started smoking before you ah,'popped him one?'”

“Yes, I really didn't do much. If Pinkie hadn't come in when she did, I would've been dead for sure.”

Dumbledore shook his head and stroked his beard some more. “I wouldn't sell yourself short Harry. Few have been in that situation and lived...Still this is interesting... Does she love baking that much?...”

“Professor?”

“Sorry, I was lost in thought there for a second.”

Dumbledore explained what he believed caused Quirrel to disintegrate like that when Harry punched him. That it was love that Quirrel couldn't bare, that resided in Harry's very skin.

After a moment of silence as Harry mulled things over, he suddenly shot out of the bed. “Wait, what about Pinkie?! How is she doing?”

With a bit of a resigned grumble, Dumbledore moved the curtain from the bed beside Harry's.

“Harry!” Pinkie exclaimed. “You're not dead!” She flopped over the bed and tried to poke his cheek while giggling.

Harry tried to bare the assault with all the dignity he could muster. “Uhm, what's wrong with her?”

Pinching the bridge above his nose, Dumbledore was starting to wish this night would just end. “I believe the youth today calls it 'being as high as a kite.'”

Pinkie giggled. “They gave me more tadpole juice!”

“It seems we still haven't found a calming draught that works as intended on miss Pie.”

Gently, Dumbledore tried to coax Pinkie back towards her own bed. When her head hit the pillow she started making theatrically loud snoring noises. The place became a lot quieter when he closed the curtains.

“Will she be alright?”

“Oh yes, just some mild embarrassment later on I would wager.”

Surprising himself with the action, Dumbledore tucked Harry back into his hospital bed as well.

“Try to sleep Harry. Everything is going to be okay, and you are still looking a little peaky.”

“...Okay.”

Gratitude filled Harry as he slowly closed his eyes. He was feeling pretty tired. Dumbledore closed the curtains and the general sound of the outside world faded away.

Harry slept for two days straight.

Author's Note

Chapter 20: The Quidditch Finale

It was morning. The morning the entire school had been waiting for. The finale between Gryffindor and Slytherin.

They were currently tied for the championship and the winner would take it all.

Pinkie was fidgeting in her seat, rocking it back and forth. Her nervousness was understandable because it was to be her first real match.

So no pressure, no pressure at all.

Luckily Millicent and Daphne were there to keep her mind of things. They had made googly eyed snakes out of an old pair of socks and some arts and crafts stuff Pinkie had brought over during the Christmas break.

The perfect little mascots.

Daphne had one and Millicent had the other, and they were currently play fighting with them over breakfast.

Speaking of which. While Pinkie normally would be eager to break her morning fast, today she found herself having difficulty.

Too much nerves! Too much excitement!

She was about to bounce right off of her seat from all the buzz, when a bunch of owls came flying in with the morning post.

Two of which were carrying a lengthy package. With a loud 'plonck' they dropped it right in her morning porridge.

The birds flew a circle, landed in front of Pinkie, slobbered some of her porridge and flew away.

“Ooh!” Millicent shouted. “Bet you a sickle that's a broom!”

“That's a suckers bet.” Daphne replied. “Go on Pinkie. Let's see what you got!”

Pinkie cracked a smile. Who could've send something as valuable as a new broom, and why?

Right now that wasn't important. What was important was getting that wrapping paper off.

With gratuitous violence, Pinkie started tearing it up. Slowly more details were revealed.
It was obviously a green broom, it would suit someone well who was flying for Slytherin that's for sure.

The commotion had caused the Slytherin table to assemble around Pinkie.

“That's a brand new Bamboozler!” Someone shouted from out of the crowd.

Now truth be told, Pinkie had no idea what a Bamboozler was. Was it quick or nimble? Could it shoot lasers?

She didn't care because someone out there just send her a brand new broom. Holy baloney! That's so cool!

Meanwhile at the teachers table, a certain deputy headmistress was glaring at a certain potions professor, who in turn looked the picture of perfect innocence.

The byplay was missed by Pinkie. She was a little bit distracted by the shenanigans of her friends.

The googly eyed snakes were hissing at each other trying to get to the broom first. Millicent's snake had won when it pinned Daphne's snake to the table.

“Ha ha, you have lost, because you underestimated the power of my poison.” The snake hissed.

“Venom.”

“What?”

“Poison is ingested, venom is injected.”

Millicent's snake took a moment to ponder this new information, causing Daphne's snake to get away. “Ah I see, cheerio. I mean, HISS!”

“HISSS!”

They were going at it for the rest of the morning. Pinkie felt suitably distracted.

xxx

I have a confession to make dear reader. Generally speaking, I do not look forward to reporting on the Hogwarts Quidditch finale.

Oh sure, there is some fun to be had in scouting out the next British talents and of course in contrast, discreetly mocking those who fall at the wayside, bad form it might be.

On the whole though, it remains a rather slow affair. When compared to the professional leagues, Quidditch at our lovely educational institution cannot help but feel like exactly that; A place for young players who must still learn the ropes.

What I witnessed on the pitch that day made even my admittedly jaded heart beat with renewed love for the sport.

I mean, how can you not be romantic about Quidditch after a finale like that?

xxx

Pinkie was holding her new broom tightly. Her entire body made a slight buzzing noise. Nerves.

Terence tried to tell her comforting things but sadly they never quite made it through. She was staring over the pitch with a thousand yard stare.

Lee Jordan started to make the announcements.

First their captain Marcus Flint, who flew on the pitch calmly. Loud cheers from the Slytherin stand flew his way mixed in with booing from the direction of the Gryffindors.

The beaters Casper and Casius were announced and they flew in a flashy zig-zag pattern to the delight of the crowds.

The chasers were next. Edward and Adrian joined Marcus to do some very impressive aerial acrobatics.

Miles Bletchley was never much for show-boating and just flew towards his hoops.

All to quickly Pinkie thought, it was her turn. She heard Lee announce her name and just like that it was on.

She jumped on her broom a bit too enthusiastically and flipped upside-down as she zipped towards the pitch.

Her new broom proved to be a much friendlier companion then her old school broom however and she manged to do a reverse loopty-loop to right herself.

The crowd thought that she did it on purpose and roared in approval. The nervousness she was feeling lessened considerably now that she had the wind blowing through her hair.

Oh yeah, she could do this.
The Gryffindors announcements were met with considerably more applause. Harry's entry was particularly raucous.

Madam Hooch urged the stadium to calm down some as she gestured the teams to their places.

“Now I want a good clean game...” She said while eyeballing the two captains, Marcus Flint and Oliver Wood with suspicion.

The two captains shook hands and glared at each other, as was tradition, during the half-hearted promises of fair play.

The last bits of nervousness that Pinkie was feeling evaporated when she looked into Harry's eyes.

It. was. on.

The knut was called, the quaffle was released, the Bludgers followed and finally...The Golden Snitch.

All promises of fair play were forgotten.

xxx

The game started like any other. Teams feeling each other out, trying to find weaknesses in their opponents, hoping to find players that were maybe not up to snuff with the rest of their team.

The seekers in particular were subject to harassment from the beaters of the other side in the early game. It proved to be rather comically ineffective.

Both mister Potter and miss Pie were extraordinarily good at avoiding any and all projectiles the beaters threw at them.

One memorable occasion was the one where miss Pie managed to avoid getting hit by a Bludger by entangling her broom in her hair and hanging underneath it.

It was at this point I started to pay a bit more attention dear readers. You don't see moves like that in the big leagues. Mostly because they take way too much time.

Entertaining though! Most definitely.

Meanwhile mister Potter, seemed to focus more on a more classic, speed focused playstyle. Choosing to just not be where the Bludgers were.

Slowly, an interesting difference started to show itself between the teams at this stage.
Gryffindor seemed to have a better sense of teamwork, while Slytherin seemed to focus more on the individual strengths its players.

This seemed to be particularly obvious when comparing the teams chasers. The all female Gryffindor chasers were superior in the long run. Utilizing both grace and teamwork to get past Bletchley.

xxx

“And Harry has the Snitch!” Lee Jordans voice echoed over the pitch. The crowd was about to irrupt into cheers.

“Oh wait, no he hasn't. That's just a dragonfly.” He said as groans irrupted instead.

The shouts had distracted Pinkie somewhat as a Bludger came zipping by underneath her broom. Fred and George still wanted some payback for that whole polka thing it seemed. Such is the life of a seeker.

Speaking of seeking, let's see if Harry is awake.

She zoofed downward towards one of the Gryffindor chasers at high speed. Harry was in high pursuit immediately. They were about to cut it close.

Pinkie's maneuverable Bamboozler aided in dodging Katie Bell just in time.

Harry, on his nimbus, was having a much trickier time of it. It was a good thing he knew his way around a broomstick. He jumped so that his broom went underneath Katie and he himself flew over her.

He made a mental note not to fall for that one again, and secretly put it in his repertoire.

xxx

As the match progressed it was apparent that the Gryffindors were ever so slightly eking ahead in the points. 110-70 turned to 120-80.

Both teams seemed to abhor a defensive playstyle so the points tallied quickly.

The atmosphere turned electric as it became apparent that the winning team probably wouldn't be decided by chasers or beaters.

No, it would be decided by the two new rookie seekers. Mister Potter had speed, but miss Pie had maneuverability.

Yes, the finale would be decided by an old school style seeker battle.

xxx

Harry and Pinkie were circling around the pitch at opposite ends trying to locate the Snitch. Flint scored 10 points but they barely noticed as the crowd roared and jeered. They had exhausted all their tricks and now only the search remained.

The search was all encompassing.

A glint of gold! Near the Slytherin goalpost. It was blind luck that Pinkie was the one that saw it first. She zipped towards it like a dog would a stick.

Only a fraction of a second later and Harry followed in hot pursuit. His broom speed making up for his delay.

The Snitch was particularly playful today and spiffed right between them towards the ground.

The crowd realized what was going on and went completely ballistic.

Grass blades flew through the sky as as the Snitch whizzed passed, followed quickly by Harry and Pinkie. Cheek to cheek they flew as they each extended their hands.

Suddenly the Snitch decided it liked the sky more and ascended with blistering speed.

Harry was quicker on the uptake then Pinkie was but Pinkie got a better angle.

Up and up they went. They were well above the stadium and into the first clouds when it happened.

A runaway Bludger hit Harry in the head with a sickening crack. He lost consciousness immediately and dropped like a stone, still holding his broom.

“Harry!!”

Pinkie had only a split second to make a choice; the Snitch or Harry...

She turned her broom around and raced towards the ground.

xxx

“Something seems to be wrong with Harry! He's falling!” Lee Jordan's voice echoed between the stands. The crowd held their breath as Harry descended towards the ground.

xxx

Pinkie knew that she was coming in too slow. She needed more speed. Just a little bit more speed! It was like magic itself had formed a barrier that was holding her back but she wouldn't let it. She wouldn't let it!

Not for one second.

The laws of physics twisted, warped and then broke as Pinkie flew through something she herself never saw.

Wind whipped in her face and she almost fell of her broom when she started to extend her hand towards Harry. Fingers inched closer as she could just about grabbed his hand.

Just in time! With a shout and a twist of her broom she rolled Harry on her broom. The roll also helped her turn away from the ground.

She had to do two circles around the pitch before she'd bled off enough speed to land and deposit Harry in the capable hands of madam Pomfrey.

A deathly silent hush fell over the stands after the initial gasps of terror. Everybody was wondering if Harry would be alright and collectively held their breath...

xxx

One of those great 'what if' moments in Hogwarts history. What if Pinkie had decided to go for the Snitch instead?

Well, what probably would've happened is that one of the teachers would intervene, save Harry instead and Slytherin would've won the game.

Dumbledore seemed perfectly capable of magicking Harry out of the sky.

Thinking about the game in this manner would be missing the point. No... I think what happened in that match was about more then that.

xxx

Pinkie was anxiously bouncing from foot to foot as madam Pomfrey was working on Harry.

Even for wizards head injuries were no laughing matter and it was important to get treated promptly.

Luckily Harry got treated very promptly. Madam Pomfrey waved her wand in frantic shapes and circles to assess the damage, and to get to work on fixing what was wrong. She had to work from the inside out otherwise inter-cranial pressure could build up.

Meanwhile, Flint was shouting at Pinkie to get on her broom and play. She didn't hear it. She was too busy worrying. Frustrated he raced of and continued the game.

Having hastily patched the concussion and reduced the inflammation madam Pomfrey knew it was time to give her patient a sip of Skelegrow to fix the fractured skull. Seeing nothing for it madam Pomfrey asked Pinkie to assist.

“Alright Pinkie, since you're not playing the game right now you might as well make yourself useful. When I wake him up I want you to hold him tightly like this.”

She showed Pinkie how to hold him tightly without aggravating his injuries.

“He's going to fight you when he wakes up so you need to hold him tightly. You understand?”

Pinkie's eyes were the size of saucers as she nodded her ascent. She idly wondered why there wasn't anybody else willing to help. She didn't realize that the crowd was too gob smacked by what they saw to properly think strait.

“Ready?”

Pinkie nodded again.

“Ennervate!”

xxx

“AAAARCH!” Harry wanted to grasp his head but was stopped. Something was trapping him! He needed to fight! Voldemort must've gotten him or something.

Harry was trying to move his way out but he couldn't. He was being restrained to tightly.

They poured something gross and chalky down his gullet. Was it poison? Why did his head hurt so bad? Then slowly it returned to him. The game, the Bludger and then a moment of falling.

He turned around and really looked for once. He saw that madam Pomfrey and Pinkie were the ones holding him, not Voldemort. He stopped resisting immediately. It helped that his headache was fading rapidly. Now only a dull throb remained.

Pinkie slowly let Harry go, anxious about what he would do.
xxx

During all of this. The game, which had continued unaffected, had been swayed slightly into the Slytherins favour. If the Snitch was caught now by Pinkie now, then Slytherin would win by a small margin.

Pinkie was too busy worrying about Harry to be getting on catching Snitches, to captain Flints immense chagrin.

He was shouting down at her to try and get her to move and catch the Snitch. But it just didn't register. Harry's wellbeing was more important.

The crowd meanwhile had sort of divided into two camps. Those that jeered at Pinkie saying that she was a wimp and should get on with catching the damn Snitch.

And those that thought she was being rather courageous.

Millicent and Daphne were, of course, split right down the middle.

“It's right there!” Millicent pointed. “Just go and catch it! You daft bint!”

Daphne was pondering the implications of Pinkies actions and figured they were actually... useful for lack of a better term.

Any Slytherin that was told that they were slimy or evil could now just point at this incident and just say 'nope.'

“Oh, let her be Millicent. Look at that.” She pointed at professor McGonagall who was practically sobbing at what was happening on the pitch.

Quidditch was a brutal sport and to have sympathy for your opponent was unheard of. To see it happen from the side of her fiercest rivals, well maybe it got a bit too much for the old professor.

xxx

Pinkie patted Harry on his shoulder and gave him a cheesy thumbs up. They kicked off and the crowd got excited again as the seearch for the Snitch was once again resumed.

The score was now 430 to 330 in favour of the Gryffindor team. Meaning that if Pinkie managed to catch the Snitch quickly they could still win this.

Fluttering impatiently, the Snitch seemed to taunt Harry and Pinkie both with dreams of victory. It hovered right in the middle of the pitch. 'Can't catch me!' It seemed to say.

Neither seeker could live with that. They raced right through the others' game, coming from opposite sides.

The Snitch zipped right through the Slytherin goalhoop as Angolina scored 440 for Gryffindor. Pinkie had to dodge the Quaffle which allowed Harry to edge closer to the Snitch.

Knowing that she would lose if she just out and followed them, she decided to gamble and hoped the Snitch would follow the angle of the pitch and the stands as it descended.

Harry was inching closer. He knew it was do or die time so he shoved himself closer to the front of the broom, becoming dangerously front heavy, just to extend his hand a little bit closer.

Suddenly out of nowhere, Pinkie barreled into him from above. She was hanging upside down with her hand extended.

Harry couldn't help but noticed that she was a little bit closer then he was. How did she managed that?

The other players meanwhile hadn't been idle either. Fred and George saw the situation as it was unfolding and decided to act.

They whacked a Bludger back and forth between them as they closed in on Pinkie. Fred had to be pinpoint accurate or he might hit Harry. Then again, if he missed they would lose anyway.

George passed the Bludger one last time and with an herculean effort Fred battered the Bludger in Pinkies general direction.

Pinkie, who was fully focussed on catching the Snitch, didn't even feel her Pinkie sense's warnings.

With a thundering crack, the Bludger hit her broom. Were it any other broom it might have survived. The Bamboozler was made with lightness and maneuverability in mind. It cracked right down the middle causing Pinkie to fall.

There was a moment of confusion as Harry instinctively dodged out of the way.

The rear piece of Pinkies broom fell in between Harry's elevator twigs, forcing him to descend. Pinkie fell holding the front piece.

Bang! She landed hard and rolled a good distance all over the grass. Her arm made a nasty crackling noise when she bounced at an unfortunate angle.

Harry's landing meanwhile was much more sedate. He tried to wrench the bamboozler chunk out of his broom while at the same time making sure that nothing was damaged.

When he finally managed to yank it out, he threw the piece over his shoulder and tried to further asses the damage to his broom. He was no expert on brooms by any stretch of the imagination but to his untrained eye it looked fine.

Harry was about to put it between his legs when he heard something.

As he turned around he was met with a rather pitiful sight. Pinkie was trying to put her two broom halves together. She was crying and he could tell that she was pretty beat up.

Great! Getting the Snitch should be easy now!

Harry dusted himself off, got on his broom proper and was about to kick of. He could see the feast already. The team would carry him on their shoulders. The party would last well into the night. Pinkie would congratulate him with a smile because that is who she was and...

It wouldn't be right.

'...Fuck...Fuck!'

He tried to kick of again, looking at Pinkie was too hard. He couldn't do it. He couldn't just fly of on his merry way.

Rubbing his head in frustration, which was still a little tender from his encounter with a Bludger, he made his decision.

'Fuck.'

With a deep breath and a soft groan, Harry made his way towards Pinkie.

'Fuck, fuck, fuckity, fuck, fuck, fuck.'

xxx

She felt like such a failure. Not only was her shoulder acky, her broom was completely ruined. Someone went out of their way to give her an amazing broom and it got destroyed on it's first outing. Probably completely beyond repair... Poor broomy.

A gentle hand landed upon her shoulder. Harry spun her around gently with a look of resignation.

“Hey Pinkie.” He said. “Do you think I could leave you crying? When I've got room on my broom for two?”

The shy smile on her grubby face made it worth it for Harry. He gestured for her to hop on. She was still holding her arm stiffly as they flew of.

The crowd looked on in stunned silence. Never in the history of Hogwarts Quidditch had anything like this happened before. Even the Snitch was just sort of hovering in place unsure of what to do. The other players were still playing when the crash happened. But now they started to wizen up on what has been going on.

The Snitch let itself be caught by Pinkie in an 'Oh, alright.' sort of way.

Professor Snape and professor McGonagall immediately started shouting over the Pitch on how the points should be distributed but madam Hooch had the rules clear in her head.

Whoever catches the Snitch gets the points and in this case that was clearly Pinkie.

The game was declared over.

First to stunned silence. Then Dumbledore slowly started to clap his hands. Then the Hufflepuffs joined in as well, and after that it became quite loud indeed.

xxx

So after all that, the game ended with four hundred and eighty points for Slytherin and four hundred and eighty points for Gryffindor.

A tie.

Nobody won, yet everyone felt like a winner. I know I did.

It's easy to say that what we saw was just two adorable and talented firsties not yet understanding the point of competition. The cynic in me could see your point.

There is a different part of me. A bigger and much fuzzier part, that tells the cynical me to stuff it.

Yet, that raises a philosophical quandary. If this is the end result we can all cheer for, what is the point of competition in the first place? Why even play Quidditch or Quadpot?

There is an avenue of play involved to be sure. Flying around and chasing things is entertaining. But the keyword here is competition. Why compete?

As I was pondering these things late at night, driving my wife barmy with this silly article, I feel I might have stumbled upon an answer.

It is to gain the respect of those we would deem our rivals. Maybe even our enemies, considering the infamous Gryffindor - Slytherin state of affairs.

Viewed from this angle, mister Potter and miss Pie were the only ones that did understand the point of Quidditch.

And doesn't that just take the cake?

Miss pie, mister Potter. My hat is off to you. For your seeker prowess, your strong sense of sportsmanship and being all round good people. I sincerely hope we will see a lot more of you both in this sport.

- Q.D. Brumhilde

Quidditch correspondent for the Daily Prophet.

xxx

It was quiet in the hospital wing. Pinkie thought that there were probably parties going on all around the castle by now. End of year parties, Quidditch parties, parties just because.

She felt rather torn. She wanted to join in, but was also very tired from all that fancy flying and...other stuff. The whole ordeal made her a bit... wary of the wizarding world.

When she looked at Harry's eyes she could tell that he felt something similar.

They were being treated for the injuries that they had gotten from the match. Harry had to be kept overnight for observation and Pinkie was currently enjoying the after effects of imbibing skelegrow.

Madam Pomfrey cast some spells on her to see if it was working. Thank goodness it was. Imagine if she had a weird reaction to that as well. Pinkie shuddered.

Madam Pomfrey left to stock up on some more potions from professor Snape, leaving Pinkie and Harry alone together.

“You know, playing Quidditch with you was a lot of fun. But the wizarding world is completely mental.”

Harry, who was staring at the wall lost in thought, couldn't help but agree. Though he felt that the muggle world wasn't much better. Perhaps people in general are just barmy?

“They do things differently that's for sure.” He said noncommittally.

A silence fell once more over the two of them. It was just a little bit awkward after all that sports drama.

“So... Why did you help me? I wasn't about to go splat like you were.”

Taking a moment to think it through, Harry actually didn't get very far. In the end he just decided to go with his gut.“... It wouldn't have been right if I didn't.”

Pinkies eyebrows raised a bit but she didn't really know what else to say.

“...”

“...”

“Hey, remember the last time we were here?” Harry asked.

Pinkie looked the other way. “I've been trying to forget to be honest.”

“...Yeah, me too. I wonder if Quirrel really was doomed or if Dumbledore just said that to make us feel better.”

“I don't think Albie would do that. I mean, he did die from a piece of cake. He couldn't exactly have been in tip-top shape.”

“Funny, I thought he died because I bounced my fist on his face and he turned into soot?”

“Fine, we'll just have to agree that we killed our defense teacher equally.”

For some reason, they thought that was funny and laughed. But the ominous feeling didn't really leave. They both knew that the shadow of Voldemort was still out there.

And who knows what else...

Chapter 21: The Last Day

The tracks started to make their slow meandering cha-chunk-a-chunk sound. The Hogwarts Express was on its way once more.

Pinkie was sitting alone in a nice cosy looking cubicle. It had a few streamers here and there, but for Pinkie standards it was downright relaxing. The atmosphere was pleasantly contemplative. Their entire year at Hogwarts had come and gone, and what a year it was.

So many adventures, so many new friends. She couldn't list them all. Actually she totally could but it would be a silly thing to do on your lonesome in a trainbooth.

It wasn't all sunshine and rainbows though, there was the whole getting beat up thing for one. Then again, that did bless her with one of her new favourite friends.

Daphne had a lot of trouble with her family and she could be a little aloof, but really who could resist that laugh?

Then there was the whole Voldequirrel fiasco. It was hard to find a silver lining around that one. Maybe it brought her a little closer with Harry? Or maybe the silver lining hadn't happened yet?

The booth door opened with a thunk and her friends came barging in with pleasant chaos. Millicent was sporting Slytherin green hair. Apparantly the Quidditch parties were wild and Archie had supplied her with some dubious potion from the Netherlands to turn her hair green.

She was maybe a bit too giddy to anger her parents.

It was rather ironic that Pinkie and Harry were kinda in the doghouse after that same Quidditch match, with their respective houses.

Draco would taunt her and called Harry her boyfriend but Pinkie just said that she could do worse and continued to supply Slytherin house with baked goods for the after parties.

The day after, the news article hit and Draco was left looking with egg on his face. Harry and Pinkie were officially 'cool' again.

xxx

Pinkie was laughing and faffing about with her friends for awhile when others started to visit.

Blaise popped 'round, so she gave him a cupcake with capibara shaped frosting. He requested the Bamboozler pieces from Pinkie saying, 'he might know a guy.' and left.

Harry, Ron and Hermione came in for a quick visit as well. Though Ron was a little uncomfortable with all that green and silver around, it was nevertheless a fun time.

Hermione got a book shaped cupcake and Pinkie got a bone crunching hug in return.

xxx

The train was on its last leg of its journey and they started to wax poetic of all the fun things they had done, the songs they sang and adventures they had.

The polka one was still a big hit in the entirety of Slytherin house. The fireworks on the astronomy tower was also pretty cool they thought. Pinkie added that shopping with Albie at the beginning of the year was also a worthwhile event.

Wow! Pinkie came to the conclusion that if you tallied all the good things with all the bad ones, then the bad ones didn't stand a chance, really.

It made her feel hopeful. Speaking of which, she was looking forward to spending her summer back at Happy oaks. That was going to be fun!

The train stopped and she waved her wand one last time before summer started. “Pep!” It whistled happily as her trunk came floating down.

She hugged her friends one last time, then jumped on the platform with her trunk on her back. A cavalcade of happy children greeted her across the barrier of platform 9 ¾

Oh boy! Did she have some stories to tell them! It made her giddy as she smiled thinking about the future and friends.

Bring it on. She couldn't wait for next year!

Author's Note

Happy new year everybody!

Sequel is up!

Prologue

Twilight Sparkle, princess of Equestria, sat in front of Ponyville hospital reminiscing.

The hospital had certainly grown over the years. Like Ponyville itself it has grown quite stately. Unlike Ponyville though, it sadly lost most of its charm. It was grey and dreary looking.

Or, maybe she was just reflecting her own mood onto it.

"Are you alright princess? Are you here to see Pinkie Pie?" A bright yellow pony with a nurse's cap said with concern written on her face.

A heavy sigh escaped Twilight. She has to go in and then it would be real. The last of her first friends would be dying. Leaving her…not alone exactly, but without anyone from her own generation.

Then again she gets to see all the generations yet to come. Guide all the little grandfoals and great- grandfoals of her friends to a bright and magical future.

Right now, that seems a very meager consolation.

"I am. Are you Pinkie Pie's attending physician?"

"Yes, Pinkie said you would be here making mountains out of molehills. My shift just ended and she asked if I could get you to go inside."

"Pinkie sense?"

"Pinkie sense." She nodded. "Good luck princess." She put a quick comforting hoof around Twilight and walked away into the sunset.

"Well… here I go."

xxx

"And then Rainbow said: 'That's not a walrus, that's my husband!'"

The filly in the bed next to Pinkie started giggling. Pinkie herself couldn't suppress a smile either. She turned towards the ceiling just remembering.

Well she wasn't really Pinkie anymore. Most called her Granny Pie nowadays. Funny that.

"Applejack did look like a right proper stallion with that moustache." Twilight said as she stepped into the ICU.

"Oh Twilight I'm so glad you could come!"

"You know princess Twilight? She's my favourite princess!" The filly said bouncing in her bed.

Twilight smiled gently at the excitable filly "Well that is quite an honour you've given me. My personal favourite is still princess Celestia though. Don't let princess Cadence know I said that." Twilight gave the filly a mischievous wink.

"It's true." Pinkie said. "She made a little shrine once in her honour."

"I was five years old Pinkie! And I told you that in confidence." Twilight said with false indignation.

The young one was giggling in her bed feeling like she was party to some big secret.

"Oh, you think that's funny do you?"

"Uh huh."

Twilight moved closer in a threatening way. "Well then I guess I'll just have to...EAT YOU!" she quickly hurled towards her new young friend and started making fart noises on top of her head.

Roaring laughter again filled the ICU and for a moment the place was just a bit brighter.

"So listen, do you think I can borrow your neighbour for a little while? We have to talk about grown up stuff."

"No." she said with the endless wit of an 8 year old.

"It's okay Summer." Pinkie intervened." It won't take long."

Twilight stepped towards Pinkies bed and moved the curtain around it. She cast a quick spell so that they wouldn't be overheard.

Pinkie looked old and thin. Her mane had turned grey over the years. Her eyes were still looking sharp though. Like she knew something you didn't.

"Hey Pinkie. So what happened?"

"I'm just old Twilight. Honestly I thought diabetes would do me in but in the end it was my heart. The old rick-a-tick doesn't wanna tick anymore. To rickety."

"Technically the heart-failure is probably caused by diabetes." Twilight looked thoughtfully at her heart monitor. "You could get a transplant you know, there are treatment options. You've helped this nation a lot after all."

"And what about Summer? You saw that filly she needs a new heart too."

A silence fell between them.

"And it's not just that..." Pinkie said looking the other way. "I can't really throw parties anymore. I can't really make ponies happy anymore. Not in the way I used to."

Tears where starting to form in the eyes of the old party planner.

"Oh Pinkie..."

Twilight slipped underneath the covers and hugged her friend fiercely. The bed started to creak worryingly. Pinkie and Twilight started laughing despite it all.

"I don't think they make these beds alicorn sized."

"I don't care, I wanna hug my friend. I'll miss you so much Pinkie."

Twilight started crying as well. Pinkie never married and never had any foals of her own. What if a thousand years from now she forgot about Pinkie?

"Twilight… Do you think my life mattered?"

Twilight turned her friend around.

"Pinkie, you made life worth living."

And in that moment Twilight new she could never forget this wonderful, insane, beautiful mare. Not by all the evil sorcerers in the world. Not in a thousand years or even a million.

Pinkie smiled.

xxx

Pinkamena Diane Pie died one week later at ponyville memorial hospital do to complications arisen from heart-failure. Her funeral was held at Canterlot palace. Approximately forty-thousand ponies came to pay their respects. Each and every single one of those ponies had a Pinkie Pie story to tell.

A testament to her character.

She was later interred at her families rock farm, her grave was marked with an old rusty cannon. Visiting the grave site became something of a rite of passage for pranksters, party planners and bakers from all over the country.

Author's Note

Chapter 3: The Evening Prophet

Evening Prophet

PIE FAMILY MASSACRE!

Last night one of the oldest and most well known families in all of wizarding Britain has been senselessly massacred by agents yet unknown. The Pie family, one of the most eccentric and well liked families in the country and one of the sacred twenty-nine, was found slaughtered this morning by friends of the family.

Initial investigation revealed that the victims appeared to be assaulted by wild animals. Aurors on the scene report this as unlikely since none of the victims were eaten. Werewolves also seem improbable because of the lack of survivors. Transfiguration seems the most likely murder magic but even then we are left with far more questions then answers. For motive and possible involvement of death eater remnants or sympathizers further investigation is required.

Why didn't they simply apparate away? To that question the aurors could only speculate. It's possible that the family was trying to protect their non-magical relatives on the estate. It is well known that the Pie family did not send squibs away and they had a strong connection to the muggle world.

Evidence suggest that the Pie family was expecting this fight however. Everywhere you look there are battlements with cannon lining the streets.

Whatever tragic fate has befallen these people, for those left behind it shall at least for now, remain a mystery.

For the full history of the Pie family see page 6.
For a eulogy by Albus Dumbledore see page 9.
For funeral arrangements and opportunities to pay respects see page 10.

Author's Note