Lyra & Bon Bon: Big Mares on Krampusby The Hat ManChaptersPart IPart IIPart IIIPart I The colt turned over in his bed, the sheets and blanket wrapped tightly around him as he tried to get to sleep. The creaking of the wooden house and the howl of wind outside set his nerves on edge, and through the window he spied the twitching of the claw-like branch of the three outside his window. He sat up to get a better look outside, the pale glow of moonlight the only thing illuminating his otherwise pitch-black room. Outside the house, the yard was covered with freshly fallen snow that seemed to glow under the moon’s light, but went a bluish gray color as dark clouds intermittently covered the pale orb. Beyond the yard were the deep woods surrounding his family’s farm. The trees, bare and skeletal, went on for miles, and he shuddered as he peered out into the deep shadows. On cold, windy nights like these, when the world was quiet and dark, his imagination started to play tricks on him. The tree scratching on the roof or side of the house became the claws of a hungry monster seeking entry. The creak of the house became the oncoming hoofsteps of some intruder. And the howl of the wind was the cry of either a wild beast or some pony unfortunate enough to encounter one. He gulped as he got up from his bed and went to the window, placing his forehooves on the sill. He stared out into the darkness, watching the trees for any sign of movement. Logically, he knew it was fine, that his imagination was just getting the better of him, and that he should quit trying to scare himself and go back to bed, but for some reason he always had to look. It’s fine, he told himself. It’s fine. There’s nothing out there. I should just go back to bed. Tomorrow’s Hearth’s Warming, after all. I should be excited and think of all the presents I’ll get… I was pretty good this year, after all. I mean, sure, I did get in trouble for pulling Whistling Dixie’s pigtails… and I did eat those cookies and blame my sister… and sure, maybe I stole Grandma’s purse so I could buy that candy I wanted, but it wasn’t that much! I’ve done lots of good things too… like… um… The colt bit his lip as he tried to remember anything particularly good that he’d done this year. He sighed when nothing came to mind, his breath fogging up the frigid glass pane. Okay, fine, I haven’t been that good. But there are worse foals than me out there, and I’ve never heard of anypony actually getting coal in their stocking or something like that. And nobody but Grandma has ever heard of that stupid monster she’s always going on about. The… what was it called? He tried to remember as he idly wiped the fog from the window with his foreleg. Then he froze. In the deep shadows of the woods at the edge of his family’s yard he’d seen something. Just for a split second he could have sworn that something had moved. He blinked and then narrowed his eyes. Had it really been there? He could have sworn that it had… some hulking shadow that swiftly moved among the shadows in the gaps between the trees. He swallowed. It could be a wolf or even a bear, he supposed. He turned his head and called “Mom? Dad?” over his shoulder. Then he turned back. Hoofprints. Hoofprints in the snow leading from the woods toward the house. But they only went part way through the snow before abruptly stopping, leaving the snow unbroken. And then he noticed that the branch of the try nearby was bouncing up and down in the same way it did when a bird landed on it or took off from it. Could something have run out of the woods and… and jumped to the tree? That’s nearly fifty feet! No way could any wolf or bear— He froze again. Between the creaking of the house, he thought he heard more noises. Were his parents coming now that he’d called them? But those sounds seemed to come not from the hall… but from the roof. He shivered, his eyes going wide. “Mom! Dad!” he called again. There was no reply, so he backed into the center of the room. A cloud passed in front of the moon again and the shadows all around him deepened. What’s out there? he wondered. Those hoofprints… they weren’t from a pony… they were cloven! But they were huge… way too big for a goat or anything like that! He nearly jumped out of his skin as he heard a knock on the door. “Son?” came his mother’s voice. “Sweetie, it’s late… what’s the matter?” With a heavy sigh of relief he ran to the door. “Mom! Mom! I saw something outside!” he turned the doorknob and threw wide the door. “I think it—” Red eyes. Red eyes that glowed in the darkness stared down at him. A scream rose in his throat as the thing standing there snatched him up. The next thing he knew, he saw a huge bag open up like a cavernous maw. In the dim light he saw the terrified faces of more foals before he was shoved inside with them and the mouth was drawn tight, leaving him in absolute darkness. Bon Bon awoke with a start. She couldn’t imagine why she’d suddenly had a nightmare about one of the old stories she’d heard as a filly. She supposed that it was because it was nearly Hearth’s Warming, which was when that ridiculous legend took place. Ridiculous… what sort of idiot would make up something so horrifying at Hearth’s Warming of all times? She felt a foreleg drape over her and a nuzzle on her cheek, and a soft voice whispered in her ear, “Good morning, Bon Bon…” She let out a sigh, letting her apprehension fade. “Good morning, Lyra,” she replied closing her eyes contentedly. As Lyra moved in closer, she suddenly sat up. “Eugh, Bon Bon, you’re all sweaty!” she exclaimed. “Were you running a marathon in your sleep or something?” Bon Bon made a face. “No, I just… had a bad dream,” she said. Lyra’s expression softened. “Oh. I’m sorry,” she said. “Do you want to talk about—” Bon Bon shook her head. “No, no, I’m fine. It was just some stupid dream.” Lyra smiled, using her magic to lift the covers and slide out of her side of the bed. “Well, tell you what,” she said, trotting over to Bon Bon’s side. “Why don’t you go shower up while I make breakfast.” Then she leaned down and kissed her on the forehead. “Happy Hearth’s Warming, by the way.” Bon Bon smiled. “Happy Hearth’s Warming, Lyra,” she replied. “All right, I’ll be down in a bit.” It was the morning before Hearth’s Warming. All around Ponyville, the houses were lit up and bright, the roofs were caked with thick, white snow, and everypony was done up in their best coats and scarves. Here and there, vendors sold hot cocoa or various holiday treats (Bon Bon herself supplied some of her best candies to several of them, in fact), and nearly every door was adorned with a wreath of pine. Families and friends carrying stacks of brightly-wrapped presents carried them house to house or loaded them onto carts to take the train to visit far-off relatives. The massive castle of the former Princess of Friendship which overlooked the town was beautifully decorated with glowing magical crystal by Starlight Glimmer as she prepared to host her first town-wide Hearth’s Warming party alongside her new vice headmare and guidance counselor, Sunburst and Trixie Lulamoon. The whole town was abuzz with the excitement of the holiday season, and, here and there, one could hear the songs of carolers braving the cold as their songs echoed throughout the streets. Inside Lyra and Bon Bon’s house, however, it was warm and cozy. A fire crackled in the fireplace as Bon Bon brought out a tray with two mugs of hot cocoa. One mug was a pale yellow with a handle colored in a helix pattern of blue and pink, while the other was mint green with a wispy white handle. “Custom-made personalized cocoa mugs: check!” she said to herself as she took a seat on the couch. “Lyra?” she called. “Cocoa’s ready!” “I’ll be right there!” Lyra called back. “Just hold on! ...Oh, and did you put—” “Two marshmallows in your cocoa instead of just one? Yes, of course I did!” She heard her laugh. “You know me so well!” “You know me so well!” Bon Bon smiled as she blew on her cocoa to cool it before taking a sip. She looked down at the coffee table in front of the couch. Between the two cocoa mugs was a partially-assembled jigsaw puzzle that, once completed, would form the image of the ponies from the First Hearth’s Warming legend. Chancellor Puddinghead was complete on one side; Commander Hurricane was as well on the other side. And just beyond the puzzle was a small framed picture of herself and Lyra in their wedding veils. It’s our first Hearth’s Warming together, Bon Bon marveled to herself. She grinned, mentally amending that it was their first Hearth’s Warming together as a married couple, not merely “best friends” (though they certainly were that). She felt a bit self-conscious about how something as simple as a ceremony and a couple of nice (if somewhat admittedly cheap) rings could change things. Ponies were used to seeing them together most of the time anyway, but since they’d gotten married the two had been more openly affectionate with one another. At one time, she’d have been annoyed with such displays, and yet Lyra’s giddy nuzzles and hugs and public cheek smooches were hard to resist reciprocating. Just the same, she hoped that things would calm down a bit after their first year together. It was a little embarrassing, even if she did enjoy the attention. “Ohhhh, darn it!” Lyra exclaimed. “Where are they?!” Bon Bon raised an eyebrow. “Lyra? Do you need help with something?” “No, it’s just… I was looking for something but… oh, where did I put them?!” Bon Bon started to get up, heaving a sigh. “Look, I’ll help you search if it’s that important—” “No!” Lyra cried suddenly. “I just… oh, for Celestia’s sake, never mind! I’ll just look for them later, I guess.” Lyra trotted down the stairs carrying a box with her magic, the golden glow of her magical aura levitating the box over to the floor. She removed the lid and lifted out two knit dolls with button eyes. “Oh, of course, our Hearth’s Warming dolls!” Bon Bon exclaimed as Lyra put them up on the mantle. The dolls, which looked exactly like the pair of them, slumped against each other for support. Just for good measure, Lyra posed them so that their plushy little forelegs were draped across each other’s shoulders. “Heh. You’re so sappy,” Bon Bon said, rolling her eyes. “Shh, they look cute,” Lyra said. “Now, let’s get to the cocoa and puzzle-solving!” Bon Bon nodded as she moved over to make room for Lyra. “Okay, if we can just find the right piece to go here… hey, wait a minute…” Lyra looked at her as she took a sip of cocoa. “What is it?” Bon Bon stroked her chin. “You said you were looking for something but couldn’t find it… but then you came down with our Hearth’s Warming dolls.” Lyra nodded. “And?” she asked innocently. Too innocently. “Then these aren’t what you were looking for,” Bon Bon said, narrowing her eyes. “What exactly were you looking for, then?” Lyra blushed. “Oh! W-w-well, I… um…” Bon Bon crossed her forelegs. “Yeeeesssss?” Lyra refused to meet her eyes as she assumed the strange, upright posture she normally took when sitting. “Look, it’s… it’s not important.” “Lyra.” “Just forget about it.” “Lyra.” “Hey, did you add something to this cocoa? It’s really good!” she said, taking a quick sip and burning her tongue. “Lyyyyyyyyraaaaaaa!” Bon Bon groaned. “Okay, okay, jeez, you know I hate it when you do that!” she exclaimed. “The truth is that I got us something special, but for some reason I can’t remember where I put it! I’m sure I’ll remember later, but I don’t want to tell you now and ruin the surprise!” Bon Bon pursed her lips. “It’s not expensive?” Lyra shook her head. “It’s not… embarrassing?” “Nope!” Lyra replied. “It’s not… it’s not human related, is it?” Bon Bon asked cautiously. Lyra scowled. “No. No, it is not,” she said. “Not that there’s anything wrong with my hobby, for the record.” Bon Bon sighed. “Okay, okay, fine, I’ll drop it for now,” she said. Then, softening, she gestured toward the puzzle. “So… any ideas which two pieces go together?” Lyra relaxed and looked over the pieces. “Well,” she said, levitating two pieces and fitting them together, “if we put these two here…” “...Just a few more pieces,” Bon Bon said, grinning triumphantly. “Ha! No puzzle can beat us!” Lyra declared, mockingly holding up a hoof as she looked to the heavens (or at least the ceiling). “Oh, by the way, what do you think we should bring to the big Hearth’s Warming party?” Bon Bon froze. “Oh… the party?” she asked slowly. Lyra nodded. “Yeah, you know,” she said as she examined another puzzle piece. “The big one at Twilight’s old castle? I mean, I know she won’t be there because she’s hosting events in Canterlot and most of her friends will be joining her for her first year as reigning Princess, but Starlight’s actually pretty nice! And besides, a lot of our other friends here in Ponyville will be there too! Doctor Whooves, Octavia, Derpy… oh, and I hear Berry Punch is bringing her special eggnog…” Lyra turned to wink knowingly at Bon Bon only to see that she was looking away. “Bon Bon? Is something wrong?” “No, no, not exactly,” Bon Bon said. “I just… well, I was thinking we could… um… maybe, kind of…” “‘Um, maybe, kind of…’ what, exactly?” Lyra asked, raising an eyebrow. “S… skip the party?” Bon Bon asked quietly. “WHAAAAAAAAAT?!” Lyra shrieked. “B-but… but it’s one of the biggest parties of the year!” “That’s kind of relative considering Pinkie Pie lives here,” Bon Bon remarked. “But it’s our first time going together as a married couple!” “Yes, and, well, I thought maybe we could just enjoy our time alone together!” Bon Bon said. She offered Lyra a weak smile. “Come on, that could be fun too!” “Sure, but this would be like the third party we’ve skipped because you wanted to stay in!” Lyra cried. “And that was fine… well, actually,” she chuckled, blushing slightly, “it was more than fine…” “Heh. Heck yeah it was,” Bon Bon added. Lyra shook her head, remembering the point she was making. “But those were minor events. This is Hearth’s Warming! It’s only once a year! And almost everypony in town is going! Cranky Doodle and Matilda are going! Seriously… Cranky. Doodle! He almost never goes out! Why the hay would we stay in?!” “Look, I just… y-you know I still prefer small gatherings,” Bon Bon stammered. “And what’s more, you get extra affectionate when you have too much hard cider or, in this case, eggnog.” “Affectionate?” Lyra asked. “And, you know, besides all the extra excitement, the way you hang onto me can sometimes get a bit… you know…” She cleared her throat and quietly added “...embarrassing.” Lyra blinked. She lowered her head. “Oh.” She got up from the couch. “I see…” Bon Bon swallowed. “Lyra—” “No, no, I get it,” she said, picking up her cocoa mug, refusing to meet her eyes. “I mean, we’re newlyweds, so most ponies understand if I’m a little affectionate, but sure, if you’re embarrassed…” “Lyra.” “...sure, sure, we’ll just spend another night at home and settle into our life of no social interaction before we take on the role of being the most dull ponies in Equestria!” “Lyyyyyyyyraaaaaaa!” “And cut that out!” Lyra shouted, whirling around on her. “You can’t just get your way every single time you do that!” Bon Bon sighed. “Okay, okay, fine,” she said. “Look, you know because of all that time I spent as a… you know…” “Secret agent,” Lyra said bluntly. “Shhh!” Bon Bon hissed. “But yes, that. The point is, I prefer to blend into a crowd if I have to be in one at all. Thanks to you, I’ve opened up a bit… but the way you act makes me feel like everypony’s staring at us!” “Oh please, nopony cares!” Lyra groaned, rolling her eyes. “I do!” Bon Bon shouted. Lyra gave a start, but then lowered her gaze, her ears drooping. “Oh. Okay,” she muttered. Bon Bon felt a pang of guilt seeing Lyra’s reaction. She grit her teeth and shut her eyes. Finally she heaved a long sigh. “You know what… never mind,” she said. She looked back at Lyra and smiled. “If it means that much to you - and if you promise to show a little restraint - then fine, I’ll go to the party.” Lyra perked up immediately. “You will! And we can bake something to bring for it!” “I… oh, sure, why not?” “Yay!” Lyra exclaimed, kicking her forelegs gleefully before pouncing on Bon Bon. “Oh, thank you thank you thank you!” she cried, eagerly planting kisses all over her cheek. “Ahhh, Lyra, stop!” Bon Bon shouted. “For pony’s sake, this is what I’m talking about!” Just then, there was a knock on the door. “Carolers!” a decidedly gruff voice called. The voices began to sing: “Ponies' voices fill the night Hearth's Warming Eve is here once again Happy hearts so full and bright Hearth's Warming Eve is here once again…” Lyra and Bon Bon exchanged a look. “That’s the worst…” Bon Bon began. “...most monotone singing you’ve ever heard?” Lyra finished. “Yeah… if they want some cookies or cider, they’re more likely to get a rotten tomato with that kind of singing.” “Well, lucky for them, we’re out of tomatoes,” Bon Bon said with a smirk. “Oh well, let’s indulge them.” They went to the door and opened it. Then they all froze. The three ponies standing there were all in green, elvish costumes with conical hats, but they were also all wearing black shades and matching black ties. And even with the silly costumes, they recognized them immediately. “Wait… Agent Furlong?!” Bon Bon cried to the tall unicorn at the center of the trio. “Ha-ha-ha,” Furlong laughed mechanically. “Who is this ‘Agent Furlong’ you’re talking about? We are just three perfectly nondescript carolers hoping to be invited in for some… some…” One of the other ponies whispered in his ear. He nodded. “...Snickerdoodles. May-we-please-come-in, strangers??” Bon Bon nodded and invited the trio in. “Oh my gosh, Agent Furlong, Bravo, Foxtrot!” Lyra exclaimed. “How nice, you came to visit for Hearth’s Warming! Oh, Agent Furlong, did you get that Hearth’s Warming card we sent you?” Furlong raised a bushy eyebrow. “Yes, Agent Heartstrings, I did,” he growled. “But I would remind you that such interpersonal communications are frowned on in S.M.I.LE.” “You sent him a card?” Bon Bon asked incredulously. “Well, sure!” Lyra replied. “You signed it!” “You just told me it was to a friend! You never said who it was!” “Oh come on, it was the least we could do after he sent us that nice card for our wedding!” Lyra said, waving a hoof dismissively. Foxtrot and Brave gave Furlong a sideways glance. “You sent them a card, Chief?” Foxtrot asked. “That’s classified,” he said, refusing to meet his eyes. “Wait, when did he send us a card?” Bon Bon asked. “Oh, he didn’t sign it, but I knew it was him from the plain white card with the simple black text and the fact that the note said ‘Sorry I couldn’t make it to Fillyville for your wedding. Signed, A friend.’ No other friend of ours keeps getting Ponyville’s name wrong like that.” Furlong heaved a sigh. “Agents, we need to change the subject,” he said gruffly. “Like maybe addressing why exactly you’re here?” Bon Bon asked, narrowing her eyes. “Exactly, Agent Drops,” Furlong said. “Do you kids remember when we sent you both to Appleoosa to search for changelings?” “I sure do!” Lyra exclaimed. “Bon, er, Agent Sweetie Drops—” she ‘surreptitiously’ winked at Bon Bon (who immediately smacked her own forehead with her hoof) “—convinced you to let me join SMILE, a.k.a. the Secret Monster Intelligence League of Equestria, rather than having my memory magically erased after she revealed that she used to be a secret agent.” “Correct, Agent Heartstrings,” Furlong said with a brief nod. “And, as compensation for her cooperation and in recognition of your fine work in Appleoosa, we allowed you both to remain in Fillyville with the understanding that we may call on you both at some point in the future.” Foxtrot held up his communicator watch. “Come in, Blue 13, this is Red 11: the Exposition Train has left the station. Repeat, the Exposition Train has left the station. Over.” “Copy that, Red 11,” said a voice over the watch. “The lampshade has been hung. Over.” “Riiiight,” Bon Bon said, “so, again… why are you here, Chief?” Furlong lowered his shades to look Bon Bon right in the eye. “Agent Drops, we’ve received word of sightings of… the Krampus.” Bon Bon’s eyes went wide. She felt her knees buckle. “Th-the what?!” “Ooh, I’ve never heard of that!” Lyra exclaimed, zipping over to her side. “What’s a Clampus?” “It’s Krampus, Agent Heartstrings,” Furlong said. “Foxtrot, the dossier.” Foxtrot removed a manila folder from inside his silly elf costume and gave it to Lyra. Inside was a brief sheet with several sketches of some tall, hairy monster with horns and goat-like cloven hooves. It carried a bundle of sticks and a sack that appeared to be filled to the brim with terrified fillies and colts. Lyra’s grin grew even broader. “Oh wow, that looks scary, doesn’t it Bon Bon?” She shoved the picture into Bon Bon’s face. “See? See how scary it looks?” Bon Bon whimpered. “I know, right!” Lyra said. Then, seeing the stern look from Furlong, she cleared her throat and forced herself to stop smiling. “Ahem. So, Chief, what’s the deal with our perp? Gimme the skinny, lay it on me, give us the lowdown.” Furlong rolled his eyes. “Agent Drops, would you care to enlighten your partner? You seem to be familiar with the creature.” Bon Bon swallowed. “Oh… w-well, not really, Chief,” she said. “I just heard a few stories as a filly. Probably an exaggeration, right?” “Honestly, we don’t have much more to go on,” Furlong said. “There’s more detail in the dossier, but I’ll give you the gist of it: “Agents, the Krampus was supposedly a tall, goat-like bipedal creature with brown hair and burning red eyes. It was something like a dark reflection of Santa Hooves.” Lyra giggled. “Santa Hooves? That’s a bit foalish, don’t you think?” “DON’T TALK SMACK ABOUT SANTA HOOVES, AGENT HEARTSTRINGS!” Furlong bellowed, silencing her instantly. As all the ponies present stared at him, he blushed and adjusted his tie under his elf costume. “As I was saying,” he went on once he’d composed himself, “the Krampus supposedly went around on Hearth’s Warming Eve, just like Santa Hooves. Only instead of rewarding good fillies and colts with treats and toys, he would find naughty foals and hit them with a bundle of sticks or scoop them up and shove them in a large sack he carried on his back to take them away, though nopony is exactly sure what happens to them after that. Incidental information tells us he can ‘smell’ your misdeeds and, just by looking at you, can tell exactly what you’ve done. “In all honesty, if we could replicate the creature’s abilities, he’d be a great interrogator,” he added. “Ugh,” Lyra said. “Who just goes around whipping other ponies’ children? Or putting them in a bag and abducting them? Even if it’s just a story, why even tell foals something this scary? It’s the kind of thing that might traumatize a kid into adulthood!” “Yeah, tell me about it!” Bon Bon said, her eyes still wide as she began sweating. “Well, we believe it’s more than just a story, Heartstrings,” Furlong said. “The Krampus seems to have disappeared a few centuries ago so our overall records are spotty at best, but we’ve received additional information from the Royal Guard, the Night Guard, and Celestia herself. From what we can gather, the Krampus is powerful, fast, and surprisingly stealthy. We’ve even got reports of resistance to magic. Whatever the case, though, given the sightings we’ve seen, we believe the Krampus could be making a comeback. The modern world has no tolerance for the Krampus’s breed of “discipline,” so it’s for this reason, Agents, that we want you two to be on the lookout for him. If you see him, report the sighting immediately and try to locate his hideout. If possible or absolutely necessary, you are to capture the creature so he can be brought to SMILE HQ and contained.” Bon Bon blanched. “You want us to catch the Krampus?!” she cried. “I did say ‘if possible or necessary,’” Furlong said, “but yes.” “Sounds exciting!” Lyra exclaimed, putting her foreleg over Bon Bon’s shoulders. Bon Bon bit her lip, thinking quickly. “W-well, I mean, normally we would,” she said, pulling Lyra in close. “However, as you can tell, we’re now a married couple eager to spend our first Hearth’s Warming together and we made plans, so it’s, uh, not… not a good time!” Furlong, Foxtrot, and Bravo all exchanged a look. Furlong heaved a sigh. “Oh, well, if it’s like that, Agent Sweetie Drops, then I guess it can’t be helped…” Bon Bon brightened. Whoa, she thought, did that actually work? “I guess we’ll just tell the Krampus that he’ll have to come back another time when it’s more convenient for us to capture him,” Furlong said, rolling his eyes. “It’s a Hearth’s Warming-themed monster, Agent Drops! This is literally the only time when we’re likely to see it for the whole year!” Bon Bon visibly sagged. “Oh, horse apples.” “Well, it’s a shame we’ll miss the Hearth’s Warming party,” Lyra sighed. “But then again, hunting a holiday-themed monster with my best friend and life partner sounds exciting too!” At this, Foxtrot raised an eyebrow. “Chief,” he said, “might I suggest that Agents Drops and Heartstrings go to this Hearth’s Warming party anyway? It would help them blend in and potentially monitor the situation at the same time.” Furlong nodded. “Good thinking, Agent Foxtrot,” he grunted. “All right, Agent Drops, looks like you kids are going to the party after all. If you’re lucky, the Krampus won’t even show up.” “You think?” Bon Bon asked hopefully. “Given this town’s reputation for attracting all kinds of monsters and mischief… I wouldn’t place any bets.” “Sweet!” Lyra exclaimed. “A party and monster-hunting! This is going to be the most exciting Hearth’s Warming ever!” Bon Bon grit her teeth. “Try to take this seriously, Heartstrings,” Furlong admonished. “Keep your eyes and ears clear, and stay off the eggnog and mulled cider. You are not to let the Krampus slip through your hooves. Now, if you’ll excuse us, we have to continue our mission.” “Gotcha, Chief,” Bravo said, raising his watch communicator. “Blue 13, this is Red 12. Operation Figgy Pudding is a go. The coal is in the stocking. Over.” “We read you, Red 12. Proceed to next location for Operation Fruitcake. Over and out.” “Well, good luck, you kids,” Furlong said, offering a brief salute as he and the other ‘carolers’ exited the house and went down the street singing the worst version of “Little Drummer Colt” either of them had ever heard. Lyra was practically dancing on her hooves. “O.M.Goodness, Bon Bon, this is going to be so great!” “Yeah… great,” Bon Bon grumbled. Lyra finally took notice of her unease. “Bon Bon? Is something wrong?” “No, no, of course not,” Bon Bon said, rolling her eyes. “It’s just that instead of the quiet night at home with my wife that I wanted, I’ve got both socialization and monster-hunting on my schedule, and I’m honestly not sure which is worse!” Lyra’s ears drooped. “Oh,” she said. “Sorry, Bon Bon, I just—” “It doesn’t matter,” Bon Bon said. She offered Lyra a weak smile, adding, “Since we’ve got no choice, I guess we should make the best of things. And hey, we have a while before it gets dark and we have to be ‘on duty’ anyway.” Lyra perked up. “You’re right!” “So we can just spend time together—” “—Getting ready to take that Krampus down!” Lyra exclaimed. “Ooh, ooh, let’s get out some of your old spy stuff!” With that, she ran upstairs, leaving Bon Bon alone in the living room. She groaned. “Ugh… just when I think I’m out, they pull me back in…” Author's Note Just as a brief note of credit, Agent Furlong, S.M.I.L.E. and the associated characters and situations were taken from the MLP book by G.M. Berrow. It's a cute, fun read, especially for younger fans, so check it out sometime if you're of a mind to! Part IIBon Bon found Lyra pulling boxes out of their shared closet. “Let’s see, grappling hook, sunglasses, fake mustache, extra fake mustaches, a guide on Manehattan accents…” Lyra giggled. “It’s pretty funny going through all this stuff again,” she said. “I think I’d talked to you at least three times when I moved to Ponyville and you had a different voice every time!” Bon Bon blushed. “I was figuring out my character!” she protested. “Oh, here we go!” Lyra said, bringing out box tied with a red ribbon. “These are just what we need to face down a monster!” She opened the box, revealing what appeared to be an assortment of different candies and treats. “Your trick candy weapons!” Bon Bon raised an eyebrow as she looked at them. She’d studied alchemy in her early years and used it to help develop candy-based weapons that had served her well in the field: exploding Pop Rocks, taffy that served as a sticky snare, a red hot that could literally heat itself to become red hot, a kinetic jawbreaker that amplified momentum when thrown to where it could literally break a pony’s jaw, and so on. “I think we might be over-preparing here, Lyra,” Bon Bon said. “I mean, think about it: even if this creature is real, the last time it was seen was centuries ago, and we’d have to be unlucky enough to have it appear in Ponyville as opposed to anywhere else in Equestria.” “Well, it never hurts to be prepared!” Lyra said. “That’s what I learned in the Filly Guide scouts! You know, I think I even have my old uniform… I wonder if it still fits me.” Bon Bon paused for a moment to think about how Lyra would look in said uniform… Hey Bon Bon… I heard you like cookies. But I’ve got an even better snack for you... “Bon Bon, why is your face turning red?” Bon Bon shook her head, clearing the mental image away. “Never mind,” she said. “Look, we’re going to a Hearth’s Warming party. We don’t need to bring all this stuff with us or it’ll look out of place. Or worse, some pony will try to eat it and get clobbered. Let’s just keep an eye out for the monster and if it appears, we can just report it to SMILE and let them take care of it.” Lyra frowned. “Oh. Well, I guess that makes sense, sure,” she said. “I mean, it would be better if we didn’t have to put ourselves in danger.” Bon Bon let out a sigh, breathing more easily for the first time since Furlong showed up. “Good. I’m glad to hear you agree.” Lyra looked down at the trick candy once more. “Although… well, we could stuff some of it in our scarves or coats or something just to be safe.” Bon Bon rolled her eyes. “Fine, I guess that would be okay if it comes to that,” she said. “Just the same, I hope we don’t run into it.” As she turned to go, Lyra suddenly placed her hoof on her shoulder. “Hm?” Bon Bon said, turning to face her. Lyra was looking at her with obvious concern. “I didn’t pick up on it because I was in the moment before,” she said, “but… you’re really scared, aren’t you?” “M-me?” Bon Bon laughed, not meeting her eyes. “No! No, of course not! I… it’s just some stupid legend that probably isn’t real anyway! Why would I—” Lyra placed her hoof on Bon Bon’s chin, gently guiding her to meet her gaze. “Bon Bon,” she said calmly, “it’s okay. You can tell me. You can trust me completely. We’re going to spend the rest of our lives together now, so there’s no reason to keep it a secret.” Bon Bon felt a lump in her throat as she smiled at her. “Ha… yeah, you’re right. I’m sorry, Lyra. Listen, it’s not like it’s a huge deal, but… when I was very young and misbehaved, my grandmare would try to scare me straight by telling me stories about the Krampus. She used to say ‘Dearie, if you are good, then Santa Hooves will bring you wonderful gifts on Hearth’s Warming… but if you are bad, then the Krampus will come in the middle of the darkest time of night, drag you from your warm bed, and whip you with his sticks for being naughty. Or he might even put you in his bag with all the other naughty foals and take you away. You wouldn’t want that, would you?’” She shuddered at the memory. “I thought her stories were just an old mare trying to scare a willful filly into behaving herself. This time of year I always think about her stories, though, and now that I know it’s real… or might be real, I guess it’s got me a little spooked. Maybe some part of me is just scared that my luck has finally run out and the Krampus is finally coming for me.” Lyra drew her in close in a tight embrace. “Shh,” she said gently, patting her on the back. “That monster isn’t interested in you. It’s only after naughty foals, not - heh - semi-naughty mares. And even if he were, he’d have to get through me to get to you. And if he knows what’s good for him, he’ll think twice before messing with my girl.” Bon Bon had to chuckle as she returned the hug, feeling Lyra’s warmth and the brush of her short mane against her cheek. With a reluctant sigh she let her go, stepping back. “Yeah, you’re right… okay, we’ll take just a few things and keep an eye out, and I’ll stop freaking out about this monster. Fillyhood legends or not, the Krampus is just like any other monster, and I’m not about to let any monster get the best of me yet!” “That’s the spirit!” Lyra cheered. “So… we’ve got a few hours before the party… you think we should…” Bon Bon grinned slyly. “Ohhhh yeah…” Lyra returned the sly grin. “Heh heh… alllll riiight…” She leaned in closer, and in a sultry voice whispered: “Gingerbread ponies.” Bon Bon blinked. “What.” “Gingerbread ponies!” she exclaimed. “You know, for the party! You make the best ones in Ponyville!” Bon Bon forced a smile. “Yes. Baking cookies. Ssssure, that’s… that’s just what I felt like doing now. I’ll go get the ingredients ready…” As she left, Lyra eyed the trick candies. If she knew Bon Bon (and she certainly did), in this state of mind she’d take only the bare minimum, if any at all, just to reinforce her assertion that they wouldn’t need them. Lyra, however, wasn’t quite so certain that the evening would be a quiet one. Just to be safe, she took a few of the candies and shoved them into her mane. She was no Pinkie Pie, but she was no amateur at smuggling such things in her mane when the need arose, after all. The party at Twilight’s old castle (nopony was quite used to calling it “Starlight’s castle” yet) was in full swing with music, food and drink, and dancing. Lyra and Bon Bon’s cookies were an instant hit and quickly vanished from the hors d'oeuvres table. Still, Bon Bon couldn’t help but notice that the turnout for the party was considerably lower than she’d expected. The last big party that Twilight had thrown at the castle - back when she’d first taken on Starlight as her student - had been a huge event with what seemed like the whole town in attendance. In contrast, this party seemed considerably more sparse. Judging by Starlight’s expression as she mingled, she’d noticed it as well. Bon Bon went to get more punch and passed by Roseluck and Derpy when she caught a bit of their conversation: “Oh where is he? I’m sure he said he’d be here!” Roseluck said, pouting. “You know Doc, Rose!” Derpy said with a shrug as she hovered unsteadily in the air. “He’s probably distracted with some experiment and lost track of time!” Bon Bon paused for a moment. Derpy was right: that did sound like something Doctor Hooves would do… but, then again, even if he could be a bit distractible, he was rarely this late to an event. And now that she thought about it, she’d heard quite a few other party guests make similar remarks about ponies they’d expected to be here, yet somehow had not arrived. “Bon Bon!” Lyra cried, trotting over to her. “Hey, come out to the balcony with me! There’s a great view!” Bon Bon frowned. “Not now, Lyra, I think there’s something strange going on here,” she said. But then Lyra leaned in close. “So do I,” she whispered, her happy demeanor momentarily dropping. “Seriously, come with me and take a look at this.” Bon Bon nodded, but then put on a happy face similar to Lyra’s as they made their way upstairs together and to the balcony. The view was indeed lovely, even if that had been Lyra’s excuse for dragging her out there. The stars were shining brightly in the night sky, and the whole town stretched out below, the snow-covered rooftops gently reflecting the moon’s glow. She had to admit, were it not for her misgivings about what was going on, the view would ordinarily be quite romantic. “Do you see it?” Lyra asked. Bon Bon squinted. “Um… sorry, what am I looking at?” Lyra rolled her eyes. “Okay, it’s Hearth’s Warming Eve, right?” she asked. “So what do ponies do to warm their hearths?” “Uh, put a log in the fireplace, of course,” Bon Bon replied. Then she noticed what Lyra meant. Anypony who wasn’t at this party would almost certainly be at home in front of the fireplace. And if they were burning a fire, then smoke would be rising from their chimney. And yet, for some strange reason, very few chimneys at all were smoking. “No chimney smoke… equals cold hearths… on Hearth’s Warming of all nights?” Bon Bon wondered aloud as she peered into the darkness. “You do see it!” Lyra exclaimed. “I was sure it wasn’t just my imagination, but if that’s the case…” As Lyra continued speculating to herself, Bon Bon scanned the horizon when she saw something that made her heart skip a beat and her breath catch in her throat. Eyes. Red eyes. For just a split second, she caught a glint of red and something large on top of one of the rooftops in the distance. Then it swiftly leapt from one rooftop to the next until she lost sight of it. Large. Fast. Red eyes. She pulled Lyra in close. “Huh? Bon Bon, uh, now’s probably not the time—” “Shh!” Bon Bon hissed, her mouth feeling very dry all of a sudden. “I think I saw something on the rooftops!” She related her description of what she’d just seen to Lyra, who suddenly seemed considerably less brave than she had been back at the house. Perhaps the reality of the situation was dawning on her. “Do you think it’s… the Krampus?” Lyra whispered. “I… I don’t know,” Bon Bon whispered back. “But let’s go check it out. We need to confirm what we saw before we report to SMILE.” The pair quickly snuck out of the party and into the cold, darkened streets of Ponyville. It wasn’t until they got further away from the castle that they realized how quiet the streets actually were. Nothing could be heard save for their hooves hitting the ground and the sound of their own breathing. “Keep looking up,” Bon Bon whispered. “It might still be on the rooftops.” “Right,” Lyra said, casting her eyes upward. They strained their ears, listening for the slightest sound that might clue them in to the monster’s location. Okay, Bon Bon, she told herself, just stay calm. Try to think… if it really is the Krampus, then why does it seem like adult ponies are going missing? According to the legends and all the stories I’ve been told, the Krampus only goes after naughty foals, not full-grown ponies! Just then, they heard a sound behind them. They whirled around and saw that snow had fallen from the rooftop into the alleyway behind them. Bon Bon looked up and saw a large, shadowy figure quickly bounding away, back and forth between rooftops. For its size, it was remarkably nimble and practically invisible in the darkness. “After it!” Bon Bon shouted. The two broke into a gallop, barely able to keep track of the creature, but then they realized where it was going: the castle. “It’s heading for the party!” she exclaimed. Lyra smirked. “And it wasn’t even invited!” she quipped. “Lyra, this is no time for cheesy one-liners, our friends could be in danger!” “Hey, just trying to lighten the mood,” Lyra grumbled. By the time they got to the castle, it was already apparent that things had gone south. The front doors had been pulled clean off their hinges and screams could be heard from inside. “Should we radio for backup?” Lyra asked as they approached the entrance. “No time!” Bon Bon shouted. “If it’s bold enough to attack all these ponies, then we’ve got to take the chance to stop it now!” As they entered, the scene was pure chaos. lights and decorations had been torn from walls, half-finished plates of hors d'oeuvres were strewn on the floor, and the music had gone silent, the speakers toppled over and broken. “Well, so much for Starlight’s first Hearth’s Warming party,” Lyra sighed. “It’s too bad… it was going pretty well up until it was attacked by the Krampus.” “We need to confirm that it is the Krampus first,” Bon Bon said. “Perhaps I can be helping with this, yes?” The two mares froze. They looked up in the direction of the voice and saw the speaker leaning over the railing of the upper level. The creature was large, stocky, and covered in brown fur. He wore a dull brown jacket over a red sweater and had large, pointed ears as well as a pair of upwardly curving horns. His eyes were completely blood red and his grin revealed two little fangs. An enormous sack was slung across his back and it appeared to be moving as numerous muffled voices inside cried out. The creature casually held a bundle of sticks in one hoof-like hand while he munched on a candy cane with the other. “Greetings,” he said. “I am Krampus. You are Miss Lyra Heartstrings and - heh - Miss Bon Bon, yes? I am glad you have come… it saves me trouble of coming to collect you two later.” “Take this, you fiend!” a voice shouted. They looked and saw Trixie run at the Krampus as she lobbed a smoke bomb at him. The Krampus momentarily disappeared in a large cloud of smoke before he simply inhaled it all, his cheeks puffing outwards. As Trixie skidded to a halt in front of him, he belched out the smoke at her, causing her to first scream, then choke as the smoke enveloped her. The Krampus chomped on the last bits of his candy cane before reaching into the smoke and plucking out a still-coughing Trixie. “Silly unicorn,” he chided. “I have plunged down lit chimneys before. Your smoke is minor annoyance at best.” Trixie stared back with terrified eyes. “Please don’t eat me,” she whimpered. The Krampus sniffed. “No promises,” he said. “Into sack with you!” Trixie screamed as the Krampus swiftly opened the sack on his back and deposited her inside, drawing it shut just as quickly. “Now, where were we?” the Krampus said, looking back down at Lyra and Bon Bon, his grin widening. Just then, a powerful beam of magic blasted him in the face. “Give her back!” They again looked up into the center of the room and saw Starlight Glimmer levitating with her own magic, her aura enveloping her entire body. Her eyes were aflame and her teeth were clenched tightly as she stared down at the monster. “Give all my friends back, you monster!” she screamed, firing another beam at the Krampus. This time the Krampus simply held up a hand, blocking the bolt with ease. Then he rubbed his jaw, a look of annoyance on his hairy face. “Bah. Naughty unicorns come out in droves today,” he said. “Your magic is like buzzing of flies to me, Starlight Glimmer. But I am glad you have stopped hiding. Now you will answer for all your sins…” Starlight gasped as the Krampus leaped over the railing with lightning-quick speed and swatted her out of the air with his bundle of sticks. She landed roughly on the castle floor and tried to get to her hooves in a daze as the Krampus landed behind her. The Krampus yanked her up by her tail, and swatted her across the backside with the bundle of sticks, causing her to shriek in pain and surprise. “You have been very-” WHACK “-naughty-” WHACK “-pony!” WHACK “Ow ow ow!” Starlight screamed, her face red with a mixture of rage and embarrassment. “What in Celestia’s name is wrong with you?! I’m not some misbehaving foal!” “No,” the Krampus said gravely, his eyes narrowing. “You much worse. But we chit-chat later.” With a final yell of angry protest, Starlight was likewise stuffed into the Krampus’s giant bag. “Okay,” Bon Bon said, her voice wavering, “we just saw one of the most powerful unicorns in Equestria blast him right in the face and he shrugged it off like a stiff breeze… we are so dead.” “Well, maybe he’s impervious to magic,” Lyra said, pawing the ground with her hoof as she prepared to charge at the monster, “but we’ve got some tricks up our sleeves too. Or, better yet,” she said, reaching into the pink scarf she wore around her neck, “in our scarves!” Before Bon Bon could react, she ran at the Krampus and used her magic to remove a taffy piece from her scarf and throw it at him. The taffy burst into several large, sticky strands that wrapped around the beast, binding his arms and legs. “Oh?” he asked, surprised but still obviously unconcerned. “What is this? You fight Krampus with snack foods? Heh. Quite amusing.” “How’s this for amusing?!” Lyra shouted, taking the kinetic jawbreaker from her scarf and flinging it at the Krampus’s head. The Krampus reacted quickly, catching the projectile in his teeth. The little piece of candy continued spinning, creating sparks as it strained against the grip of his jaws. Once it finally lost its momentum, however, the Krampus simply moved it to his back teeth and crushed it in one bite. “Ooh, this one had layers. I should know not to try to eat in one bite, but I can never help myself. Now,” he said, casually snapping the taffy strands as he stepped towards them both, “will you two come like nice little fillies? Or perhaps you are wanting to keep doing things the hard way?” Lyra gulped. “B-Bon Bon, I could use some backup!” But Bon Bon found that she was frozen to the spot. Despite the creature’s almost cuddly appearance and easy-going demeanor, it was still the legendary creature from her grandmare’s stories, the creature of her nightmares, and it was seemingly unstoppable. “Bon Bon!” Lyra’s voice finally snapped her out of it and she reached into her own scarf for a weapon. The Krampus sighed. “Hard way it is,” he muttered. He sprang forward and grabbed Lyra by the neck with one hand and ripped her scarf off her neck with the other, spilling the candy-themed weapons all over the floor. “No! Put her down!” Bon Bon screamed, and threw a hoof-ful of exploding Pop Rocks at the beast. He was showered in a series of tiny explosions, each of which left a bit of soot on his clothes and face and stung more than he would have liked to admit. “Bah! Tricks are no longer amusing!” he growled, opening his sack. “Bon Bon, hel—” Lyra shouted as she was stuffed inside. “You monster, you let them go!” Bon Bon shouted, throwing weaponized candy piece after piece as the Krampus stomped over to her. Hot, angry tears spilled onto her cheeks as he shrugged off each attack until he stood directly in front of her. As she stared up at him, his eyes seemed to glow, and she felt as though his gaze was peering into the very depths of her being. “Ah. Your grandmare… she told you about me, yes?” he asked. “Few ponies these days remember Krampus. I make sure they never forget. All ponies soon fear me like you do, little earth pony.” “I’m…” Bon Bon swallowed, shaking with anger as she stared up at him. “I’m not afraid of you.” The Krampus sniffed. Then he took a deep breath and roared at her, his fur-covered face momentarily distorting into a horrific, batlike visage as his piercing shriek shook her to her very bones and flecks of his spittle sprayed her on the face. She felt her legs give out and she stared up at the Krampus in wide-eyed terror. “Hmph. Naughty little liar,” the Krampus grunted, picking her up by the scruff of her neck as he pulled open the sack. “You join your lovey dove now.” Bon Bon felt herself being carried over the creature’s head, narrowly missing his horns as she stared into the depths of the massive burlap sack. Dozens of ponies stared up at her, their eyes constricting in the sudden light. Among them, near the top, she saw Lyra reaching out for her. She felt Lyra’s forelegs embrace her as she was shoved inside, and then the bag was cinched shut, sealing them all in darkness. “Ugh, could you move your leg?” “Sorry, it’s cramped in here!” “Where is this monster taking us?!” Amid the chattering of the ponies inside the sack, Lyra gently stroked Bon Bon’s mane as she tried to calm her down. “Hey, just relax, Bon Bon,” she said softly. “After all, now we can track this monster to his lair!” Bon Bon glared at her. In the very dim light, she saw Lyra’s sheepish smile. “W-well, sure it’s not quite how we planned, but at least we’re on the right track!” “Hey, I just thought of something!” Rose exclaimed from somewhere below them. “Maybe Starlight can use her magic to cut a hole in the sack or teleport us out!” “Sorry,” Starlight said, “but I - ow - I tried that already. This sack may look like a normal burlap sack, but it’s obviously enchanted. Somehow it’s dampening everypony’s magic; I can’t cast even a single spell!” “Well, what is this ugly thing and where is it taking us?!” Trixie demanded. “It’s called the Krampus,” Sunburst said. “I’ve read old legends about it before. It’s supposed to appear around Hearth’s Warming - or at least it used to - and what it does with ponies it takes away varies from legend to legend. Some say that it drowns them in a river—” Several ponies gasped. “—or takes them to Tartarus—” More ponies gasped, this time more loudly than before. “—or just eats them!” Another round of gasping. “Okay, okay, yes, thank you, Sunburst,” Starlight said hurriedly. “Look, if we all remain calm, I’m sure we’ll either figure a way out of this or somepony else will come to save us.” “Yes, well, perhaps it would accept payment or perhaps a ransom,” said a snooty, muffled voice from the very bottom of the sack. “Hey, is that Spoiled Rich?” Lyra asked. “Yes, and for some reason this revolting beast picked me up first, which is why I’m on the bottom of this horrible pile. When my husband hears of this indignity, heads will roll!” she declared, her voice somehow finding its way up through the tangled living mass of ponies piled on top of her. “And speaking of indignity, will whoever’s on top of me kindly move his posterior off my head!” “SORRY!!” Bulk Biceps shouted. Lyra looked down and saw a red and green glow on Bon Bon’s watch. “HQ, HQ, come in!” she whispered. “This is Agent Sweetie Drops! Agent Heartstrings and I have been discovered! We need back up!” The watch was silent. Not even static could be heard, which meant that the signal was completely dead, the magical link between it and SMILE HQ was cut off, just like Starlight’s magic. “HQ, come in! Can anypony read me? Come in!” “Bon Bon, that’s not going to work,” Lyra whispered back. “And keep your voice down. What about, you know, your secret identity.” “The hay with all that!” Bon Bon hissed. “We’re being dragged off to who-knows-where by my fillyhood nightmare! How could I possibly stay calm in this situation?!” “Well, at least the Krampus put us here together,” Lyra offered. “That just means that one of us can’t rescue the other! Ugh, see, this is why I just wanted to stay home tonight! No party, no adventure, and definitely no monster hunting!” “Bon Bon, come on, try to stay optimistic,” Lyra said. “Being negative won’t get us anywhere.” Bon Bon just grumbled. After a moment, Lyra snickered. “Hey, Bon Bon… Bon Bon… hey, Bon Bon…” Bon Bon ignored her, continuing to fume. “Bon Bon… hey, Bon Bon… Bon Bon, guess what?” “What?” Bon Bon asked through clenched teeth. Lyra leaned in close. “We’re - heh heh - we’re ‘in the sack’ together.” Bon Bon would have facehooved if she’d had room to do so. But soon Lyra’s snickering proved too much for her and she started laughing as well. “Well, I’m glad somepony’s having fun,” Starlight said, hearing them chuckling, “but maybe instead of complaining or joking around, we should come up with a plan together!” The mass of ponies was silent. Somepony coughed. “Uh, sorry, Starlight, but I’ve got nothing,” Trixie said. “Though, to be fair, it’s kind of hard to think when we’re all crammed in here like this.” “Oh come on!” Starlight exclaimed. “Sure it’s dark and cramped and - ow! - and hot and uncomfortable, but all of us in Ponyville have faced way worse than this! This is nothing!” Then somepony farted. As the bag erupted into chaos with groans, gags, and lots of accusatory yelling, Lyra wore a smile on her face. Despite their dire situation, she did have one more idea... Part IIIA short while longer, the Krampus hummed a little tune and set down the bag, saying “Here we are: cavern sweet cavern!” His hoof-like hand reached into the sack and pulled them out one-by-one. Their momentary relief at no longer being confined quickly gave way to terror and struggling, but no amount of kicking, biting, or otherwise seemed to deter the Krampus. He reached in and pulled out Bon Bon, then Lyra and the two of them were tossed into black, bell-shaped cages that shut and locked behind them. Lyra looked and saw that, though they were in separate cages, fortunately they’d been placed right next to each other. “Are you okay, Bon Bon?” she asked. “Yes, but… Lyra, look!” Bon Bon said, her eyes wide as she took in their surroundings. Lyra looked as well and saw that they were in a massive cavern filled with cages similar to their own. The Krampus was going around and quickly filling them. Dozens and dozens of ponies from Ponyville were imprisoned here along with them. Starlight and Trixie and a few others immediately tried to teleport out or blast the lock off, but though their magic now worked, it could not penetrate outside the cage and merely dissipated once it hit the narrow bars. “You waste your time, ponies,” the Krampus chided, wagging a bony finger at them. “Cages are impervious to magic and too strong for earth ponies to kick open. Try if you must, but you will see that Krampus speaks the truth!” “What is the meaning of all this!” Starlight shouted. “Why did you bring us all here?!” The Krampus sniffed. “I take it you talk about me while in sack, yes?” he asked. “Then you know that I punish the naughty foals.” “But we’re not foals!” Trixie protested. “And we’re not naughty! ...You know, most of the time. Or at least not that naughty. Or at least not all of us are.” The Krampus grunted and smacked Trixie’s cage with his bundle of sticks. “You talk too much, little unicorn. But very well, if you want explanation, I give you one…” He waited until he had the rapt attention of all the ponies around the cavern. “Think he’ll break into a song?” Lyra whispered. “Shh!” Bon Bon hissed. “Long ago,” the Krampus began, “I was one of many creatures fashioned by the evil Grogar. He gave me such great powers, including ability to smell the sins of others, and the sight to see each misdeed. But I had no interest in terrifying ponies for Grogar, so I left to live alone in wilderness. For long time, it was just me. But then one day, strange visitor came to me. He called himself… Santa Hooves.” Spoiled Rich guffawed loudly. “You shut pointy snooty face or Krampus whip you so hard that little pony butt cheeks will resemble baboon’s!” he shouted, pointing his stick bundle at her. Spoiled fell silent, her mouth shut tight and her eyes bulging. “Now, where was I… ah, yes… “Santa Hooves learned of what I could do and took me to his toyshop in frozen north. He say that he want to reward good little fillies and colts with toys and treats on Hearth’s Warming, but he worry that maybe bad little fillies and colts need a bit more… motivation. So he take me in, we go out, and we visit all the little households. He fill good foals’ stockings; I make them fill their little drawers. Heh. All goes well for long, long time.” He paused, smiling. “Santa Hooves was Krampus’s first real friend. We make good team, and he let me stay in nice warm house, drink cocoa, and every Hearth’s Warming, we ride out to do our jobs. Never was I happier.” Then, slowly, the joy drained from his face, and he visibly sagged. “Then I think ‘What if scaring ponies and threatening with switch not enough? What if I give them real scare! That make them behave for sure!’ So, I start whipping across backsides. I threaten to eat, but I never actually do it! I start taking up the naughtiest ones in big sack. I become most terrifying monster in all of Equestria, and parents have me to thank for little ones behaving like little angels for rest of year!” He thumped his chest proudly. “But Santa Hooves is furious! He tell me that I cannot do these things anymore. I did not hit ponies too hard! I only take ponies in sack to scare them! Sometimes pretend to let them escape or just dunk in river and take right back home or threaten to eat if they do not change naughty ways… but Santa Hooves does not listen. We argue, have big fight and… and then…” He heaved a sigh. “And Krampus is no more. Krampus is no longer invited on Hearth’s Warming ride. I go back to wilderness to live alone once more.” “That’s really sad,” Lyra said. “Yes, naughty pony, it is,” the Krampus said, bowing his head. “But I always keep watch on Equestria. Mostly I just keep to myself, but then, in recent years, I see all these villains try to take it over! I wonder, ‘Where all these naughty villains coming from?’ And then I realize that nopony is afraid to grow up to be naughty any longer! Some one should bring back fear! “Now, by taking all these naughty ponies from one town, legend of Krampus will rise again!” he exclaimed, raising his arms triumphantly. “Children will grow up hearing tales of Krampus, and then no more villains will dare to be naughty ever again!” The cavern stared on in silence. “What?” the Krampus asked, looking around dejectedly. “No applause? Hmph, fine. Next time perhaps I should sing song.” “But wait just a second!” Sunburst shouted. “You say you want to punish ‘naughty ponies.’ Like Trixie said, we’re not bad ponies! Why punish us?” Krampus shook his head. “You think yourselves innocent? You are steeped in sins up to your fetlocks!” “What possible sins could you be speaking of, you horrid brute?!” Octavia shouted. “You want me to list them? In front of all other friends?” the Krampus asked. “Very well…” He pointed at Trixie. “Egocentrism and abuse of magical artifact!” He pointed at Bulk Biceps: “Improper volume control!” “I’M JUST EXUBERANT!” The Krampus began pointing at more of them. Doctor Hooves: “You forget important events because you are too busy in lab!” “B-but, my experiments—” At Derpy: “Carelessness with packages!” Derpy shrugged. “Everypony makes mistakes!” Octavia: “Snootiness!” “Well, I never!” Spoiled Rich: “Greedy elitist!” “Whatever the fine is, I’ll pay it!” Cranky Doodle: “Grouchiness!” “Oh, go soak your head! And couldn’t you find a bigger cage?!” Mud Briar: “Being a smarty-pants!” “Technically, the word is ‘pedantry.’” Maud Pie: “Liking this smarty-pants!” Maud looked over at Mud Briar and smirked. “That’s fair.” Then the Krampus looked over at Starlight Glimmer. “And you, Miss Starlight, are so naughty that I am ashamed that I didn’t come for you until now!” he yelled. “You are guilty of brainwashing, abuse of magic, and violating rules of time and space for petty revenge!” Starlight’s jaw dropped open. She sank to her haunches and lowered her head. “Hey, you leave her alone!” Trixie shouted. “Starlight’s changed! She’s done a lot of good things and more than made up for everything she did! Even Twilight Sparkle knows that she’s a changed pony, and - even if the Great and Powerful Trixie hates to admit it - she’s a great judge of character.” “Bah!” the Krampus grunted. “Sin is sin. If it is not punished, it still exists. Now, enough chit-chat… who is first to get backside paddled raw with sticks?” “Me!” Octavia shouted, raising a hoof. The entire cavern went silent. “Ah, that is… um…” Octavia trailed off, her face turning red. “Well, I guess we learned something new about her,” Bon Bon mumbled. “Whoa whoa whoa!” Lyra cried out. “All those things you talked about are things we’ve all moved on from! And most of them are just minor things! Nopony should be locked up for them!” The Krampus paused for a moment, then went over to her cage. “Sin is sin,” he growled. “Naughty is naughty. There is no ‘minor’ thing.” “You get away from her!” Bon Bon growled, reaching for him through the bars of her cage. “You two… you so cute and all lovey dovey,” he said, crossing his arms. “But you build your house on buried secrets. Bon Bon never told you, Lyra, about old life until she had to, yes? And still she keeps fears secret and even lies to herself about them. Perhaps if you had been honest, you would have prepared for me properly.” Bon Bon swallowed and looked down, knowing he was right. “But little sweet Lyra… you never tell your new wife that you keep sneaking bites of her candies or cupcake batter when she looks away…” Lyra blushed. “I… have a bit of sweet tooth, sure, but that’s—” “And you never tell her about Cloud Chaser.” Lyra froze. “Cloud Chaser?” Bon Bon asked. “Lyra… what is he talking about?” “Heh,” the Krampus sneered. “She—” “No!” Lyra said sternly. “I’ll tell her.” Bon Bon looked at her. Lyra felt a lump in her throat as she looked back into those deep, blue-green eyes. “I… well, about a month into our, uh, relationship back when I’d just moved to Ponyville… I kissed Cloud Chaser at a party.” Bon Bon blinked. “I… what?” “I’m sorry!” Lyra said. “It was just once, I’d had too much cider, I felt horrible about it and nothing else ever happened!” Bon Bon sighed. “I don’t really care about that, Lyra, not after all we’ve been through,” she said. “I just… I just wish you’d told me.” The Krampus snickered. “Ahh, you two really are perfect couple,” he said. “So close, and yet so many secrets hiding.” “Look, yes, I wish she’d told me,” Bon Bon said, “but now I know, and I’m not upset.” Lyra brightened. “You’re not?” “No, of course not!” she said. “So let her go! Do you understand? I don’t want her punished!” The Krampus tilted his head at her. “That is not important,” he said. “Only way to expunge your misdeeds is punishment.” He turned to the rest of the cavern, raising his voice. “But don’t worry, my little ponies… I am certain that I can properly punish you all and have you all back to your homes by, say, next Hearth’s Warming!” A chorus of protests went up at the thought of spending the next year locked up in this cavern. “Yes, yes, is very sad for you,” the Krampus said, rolling his eyes. “Ah, but I have lost track of time. Perhaps just one more run through Ponyville to collect more naughty ponies.” He picked up his sack and started toward the entrance. “Now don’t you naughty ponies go anywhere!” he laughed, dashing off into the night. As the cavern fell into a state of panic around them, Bon Bon slumped against the bars of her cage. “Great… just great,” she sighed, feeling a lump in her throat. “Our first married Hearth’s Warming… our first year of marriage… and we get to spend them locked up in a cage. Not even in the same cage! Oh… oh, Lyra, I’m so—wait, what the buck are you doing?!” Lyra appeared to be vigorously fluffing her mane, coming through it with her hooves like she had a bee in it. “Lyra, I hardly think this is the time for mane maintenance,” Bon Bon said. “Yeah, but it’s probably just the right time for an escape attempt,” she said, bringing out the candy piece she’d hidden in her mane, giving a sly wink. “Lyra! That caramel’s a plastique explosive!” Bon Bon gasped. “Exactly!” she said, wedging it into the lock. “Now, I think I can ignite it with my magic, since my magic still works inside the cage.” Her horn began to glow as she aimed it at the lock. “Okay, here goes…” The candy exploded with a sharp crack and the door to her cage flung open. All the cavern suddenly fell silent as they saw Lyra jump out onto the rocky floor. “I made it!” Everypony cheered loudly, turning the cavern into a cacophony. “Okay, Bon Bon, I just need to get you free next!” Lyra exclaimed. She searched around for something heavy to help break the lock on Bon Bon’s cage and found a large rock. She bashed it against the door several times, but succeeded only in breaking the stone to pieces while the door remained intact. “Lyra, listen,” Bon Bon said. “I’m not sure how long the Krampus will be gone. Here, take my watch communicator,” she said, passing it to her through the bars. “Go and try to radio for help. Bring everypony you can to come and save us!” “Me?!” Lyra exclaimed. “B-but I don’t want to just leave you here!” “The longer you take to escape, the more likely it is that the Krampus will catch you!” Bon Bon shouted. “Go!” “But—” “Go!!” Lyra hesitated for a moment more, her lower lip quivering, but then she turned and ran toward the mouth of the cavern, taking the watch communicator with her. Once outside, she saw that the cavern was deep inside a forest. A wild snowstorm was already in full force and fat snowflakes were swiftly covering the ground with a blanket of snow. She shivered in the cold and pressed the communicator. Static. She was too far out to get a signal. She wasn’t sure which way to go, but the worst place she could be was right there where the Krampus could find her. With no other choice, she galloped off into the woods. With any luck, the snow would cover her tracks before the Krampus returned. Over an hour later, Lyra had managed to find an exit to the woods and instead found herself trekking over white, rolling hills. She panted, her breath forming steam clouds as she trudged up another hill, hoping that she’d finally spot a village or somewhere safe. She pressed her watch communicator for what felt like the hundredth time. “HQ come in… this is… this is Agent Heartstrings… please respond…” More static. “HQ, come in… I repeat, this is… hah… this is Agent Heartstrings…” She came up over the hill. On the other side was simply an endless field with nothing but bare trees caked in snow. No cities were on the horizon. There were no villages. Not even a simple farm could be seen. She was all alone, surrounded by endless white, her mint green coat the only spot of color in the vast, frozen wilderness. “HQ… come… in…” she gasped. She took another step forward, but her legs gave out and she collapsed into the snow. She was so cold, and the snow began to collect on her coat as if forming a blanket. Her eyes felt heavy. She was so tired… she just wanted to sleep… “This is it,” she whispered, her eyes slowly shutting. “Bon Bon… I’m sorry… I wish I could make it up to you…” She curled herself up into a ball, trying to hold onto what little warmth she had left. “If I could have one gift for Hearth’s Warming… I’d just want to spend a quiet day with you… just like you wanted.” She shut her eyes. The world went silent. And yet, for some reason, she thought she heard a jingle bell. “Well, now,” said a deep, sonorous voice as a hoof crunched into the snow next to her, “that certainly is a sincere wish. And I happen to hear such wishes the loudest, even if they’re whispered.” “Who…?” Lyra asked weakly. She felt herself being lifted from the snow and onto the speaker’s back. “Now, now, Lyra, let’s get you warmed up and then we can see about granting your wish…” She looked up, and though her vision was blurry, she saw a red cap and long, branching antlers… “Bah!” the Krampus grumbled as he paced the cavern floor. “How did that little unicorn escape?! My cages are perfect! Nopony can escape them!” “Really?” Bon Bon asked, smirking. “Because it seems somepony did.” The Krampus roared and stomped over to her cage. “You! This is your doing! Tell me how she did it!” Bon Bon smirked. “You keep your silence? Very well, then,” he said, unlocking her cage and yanking her out roughly, “if your lovey dove has left you here, then you will take her punishment for her!” He raised the bundle of sticks high over his head. “Put. Her. Down. Now.” The Krampus froze and slowly turned. The whole cavern gasped in awe. A towering reindeer dressed in red with a flowing white beard and jingle bells around his neck stood at the entrance to the cave. Lyra peeked out from behind his long legs and waved at Bon Bon. “So… you finally come to see old Krampus, eh, Kringle?” Krampus sniffed. The reindeer nodded gently. “It’s been a long, long time, my friend,” he said. “Wait,” Bon Bon gasped. “That can’t possibly be… are you really…?” “Santa Hooves?” the reindeer asked, raising an eyebrow. “Oh, surely that must be a fairy tale, don’t you think? Ho ho ho…” The cavern erupted in cheers. “Silence!” the Krampus roared. “All of you, be silent!” “Krampus,” Santa said gently, stepping towards him. “I understand how you feel, but you surely know this is wrong.” “Bah!” the Krampus snorted, waving a hand dismissively. “You coddle all the little foals with your toys and your goodies. What is worst thing you ever do to bad ones? Coal in stocking? You never wanted to get your hooves dirty! You left me to do dirty work and everypony loves you, but they hate me. I would not mind, but when I try to do job even better, you toss me out like old fruitcake! “Well, no more! I, the Krampus, will punish these naughty ones and absolve them of all their sins!” Santa Hooves took a deep breath and went right up to him. “Well, then, my old friend, I have only one thing to say to you…” And then, to everypony’s surprise, he bowed his head, even bending a knee. “I’m sorry, Krampus.” The Krampus gawked at him. “You… are?” “Yes, I am,” he said. “Perhaps it was pride that kept me from seeking you out, or perhaps it was the vain wish that you’d simply moved on, but seeing what you’ve done makes me understand how deeply upset you must have been. But there’s no need to punish these ponies, no matter what they’ve done.” “Oh?” the Krampus asked. “Then what can cleanse them of their misdeeds?” Santa chuckled. “Ah, Krampus… you and I are of a different time. Reward the good and punish the bad: that was our philosophy. But not every good deed goes unrewarded, and not every bad deed need be punished. But if a bad deed is truly to be expunged, then you need only watch these two mares to find out how…” He looked down at Lyra. She stepped forward, locking eyes with Bon Bon. “Bon Bon… I’m sorry for not telling you about Cloud Chaser,” she said, placing her hoof on her heart. “And for eating your cookie dough batter without asking. Annnnd for not being more sensitive about what you wanted to do for Hearth’s Warming. Do you forgive me?” Bon Bon’s eyes began to water. “Lyra… of course! You’re my very best friend and the pony I love best in the world. Why would I ever hold it against you? Just… do you forgive me for, well… all the secrets I’ve kept too?” “Of course I do!” Lyra exclaimed. “Bah!” the Krampus scoffed. “This again? The deed remains! Nothing can… can…” He paused. His red eyes glowed, but he saw that the dark aura of sin he saw around them was rapidly dissipating. “No… no, it is not possible…” “Ponies of Equestria!” Santa called out. “Do you likewise renounce your grudges against each other? Do you choose to forgive, rather than punish?” A chorus of emphatic agreement spread throughout the cavern. Pony turned to pony, offering apology and forgiveness for every misdeed that came to mind. “No… no no no no no!” the Krampus shouted, dropping Bon Bon as he whirled around in a rage. “Without punishment, there is no absolution! Without fear, the sinner will sin! The naughty pony of today will become the villain of tomorrow! I must… I must…” Santa put his hoof on the Krampus’s shoulder. “Krampus,” he said, “I should have listened to you and tried harder to understand your concerns. Rather than casting you out, I should have found a way for you to keep working by my side. Perhaps, every once in a while, a good scare is exactly what a child needs to keep them on the straight path. So, my friend, will you forgive me of my misdeeds and let me make amends?” The Krampus stared at him for a moment, blinking numbly. “I… I…” Then he took on a fierce grin and dashed behind Santa, swiftly whacking his backside with the bundle of sticks, causing the reindeer to yelp in pain. “Hahahaha!” the Krampus laughed. “Ahhh, apologies, Kringle, but I would not be myself if I did not do that at least once… “But very well,” he said, holding out his bony, hoof-like hand, “I will forgive you, provided you do the same for me. Perhaps next year will be a better Hearth’s Warming for us both.” Santa laughed in spite of his embarrassment and sore bottom and hoof-bumped the Krampus. “Lyra, you did it!” Bon Bon cried, running to her and tackling her in a big hug. “Me? Nah, it was a team effort,” she chuckled, looking up at her. Then she got a sly grin. “Hey, as long as we’re like this…” Bon Bon grinned back and leaned in, her lips covered. Santa elbowed the Krampus. “Krampus, if you wouldn’t mind?” The Krampus roared at them both, raising the bundle of sticks threateningly. “No naughtiness!” he shouted. The two mares separated and nodded instantly. “Good,” Santa Hooves said. His antlers glowed and he cast a beam of magic at the watch communicator Lyra wore around her foreleg. “Now, while the Krampus frees the rest of your friends, I suggest you call your agency. And tell them to bring lots of memory-erasing mirrors… I’m afraid this incident is a bit too public for my taste.” Lyra nodded. “Um, HQ, this is Agent Heartstrings reporting in…” “Heartstrings?” Furlong asked. “What’s going on, what’s your status?!” Lyra and Bon Bon exchanged a look. “Uhhh, this might take a while…” Bon Bon’s eyes gently fluttered open as she awoke in her bed the next morning. The soft light of dawn was just beginning to trickle in through the window. A mint green foreleg draped over her and she felt Lyra’s muzzle press into her neck, her warm breath tickling her slightly. “Looks like Santa got me my Hearth’s Warming wish,” Lyra chuckled. She leaned in close and planted several kisses on Bon Bon’s cheek. “Mmm,” Bon Bon murmured, turning to face her and hold her close. “We should really get up.” “Hm… nah,” Lyra said. “No? Not for breakfast?” “I’m not that hungry,” she said, her traitorous stomach gurgling. “Oh? Not to open presents?” “They’re not going anywhere.” “Not even to find out what crazy cover story SMILE cooked up to explain everything that happened?” “Ehh, we’ll find out soon enough.” “Hmmm, well, in that case…” She leaned in for a kiss. “Oh!” Lyra said, sitting up suddenly. “Wait! I do know of something worth getting up for!” “Ugh,” Bon Bon groaned. “It better be…” Lyra ran out of the room and down the stairs. There was some commotion in other parts of the house, but soon she returned carrying their Hearth’s Warming dolls in her magic. “Lyra, I’ve seen those,” Bon Bon said. “Ah, but I just remembered where I kept this!” Lyra exclaimed, holding up a second box. “I ordered this from Rarity and I meant to show it to you yesterday, but now that I remember where I put it, it’s time to show you!” “Show me what?” Bon Bon asked impatiently as she sat up, rubbing her eyes. Lyra had turned her back for a moment, but when she turned back around, Bon Bon saw what she’d done. The two dolls bearing their likenesses were now each wearing a miniature white wedding dress. Bon Bon’s eyes lit up. “O…” “M…” Lyra added. “Goodness!” they both finished together, laughing. “Okay, okay, let’s go put them on the mantle,” Bon Bon said, getting up and trotting to the stairs. “And then? Should we do something nice for Hearth’s Warming?” Bon Bon smirked. “That… and then maybe something naughty.” Lyra followed her, giggling like a schoolfilly. For that Hearth’s Warming and many to come, she knew, there would be ups and downs, good deeds and misdeeds, and time after time they’d make mistakes and have to forgive each other all over again. And knowing that each would be there for one another through it all was truly the greatest Hearth’s Warming gift they could have asked for. HAPPY HEARTH’S WARMING TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT! or Merry Christmas, from The Hat Man! Author's Note Happy holidays to you all! I hope you enjoyed this, my fifth annual holiday story! You can read my other ones at this bookshelf here! Also, as a gift to my editors, this story has not been edited by anyone but me, so please forgive some rough spots. Thanks for reading! By the way, here's the full cover image done by my longtime friend and collaborator, Greenfinger!
Part I The colt turned over in his bed, the sheets and blanket wrapped tightly around him as he tried to get to sleep. The creaking of the wooden house and the howl of wind outside set his nerves on edge, and through the window he spied the twitching of the claw-like branch of the three outside his window. He sat up to get a better look outside, the pale glow of moonlight the only thing illuminating his otherwise pitch-black room. Outside the house, the yard was covered with freshly fallen snow that seemed to glow under the moon’s light, but went a bluish gray color as dark clouds intermittently covered the pale orb. Beyond the yard were the deep woods surrounding his family’s farm. The trees, bare and skeletal, went on for miles, and he shuddered as he peered out into the deep shadows. On cold, windy nights like these, when the world was quiet and dark, his imagination started to play tricks on him. The tree scratching on the roof or side of the house became the claws of a hungry monster seeking entry. The creak of the house became the oncoming hoofsteps of some intruder. And the howl of the wind was the cry of either a wild beast or some pony unfortunate enough to encounter one. He gulped as he got up from his bed and went to the window, placing his forehooves on the sill. He stared out into the darkness, watching the trees for any sign of movement. Logically, he knew it was fine, that his imagination was just getting the better of him, and that he should quit trying to scare himself and go back to bed, but for some reason he always had to look. It’s fine, he told himself. It’s fine. There’s nothing out there. I should just go back to bed. Tomorrow’s Hearth’s Warming, after all. I should be excited and think of all the presents I’ll get… I was pretty good this year, after all. I mean, sure, I did get in trouble for pulling Whistling Dixie’s pigtails… and I did eat those cookies and blame my sister… and sure, maybe I stole Grandma’s purse so I could buy that candy I wanted, but it wasn’t that much! I’ve done lots of good things too… like… um… The colt bit his lip as he tried to remember anything particularly good that he’d done this year. He sighed when nothing came to mind, his breath fogging up the frigid glass pane. Okay, fine, I haven’t been that good. But there are worse foals than me out there, and I’ve never heard of anypony actually getting coal in their stocking or something like that. And nobody but Grandma has ever heard of that stupid monster she’s always going on about. The… what was it called? He tried to remember as he idly wiped the fog from the window with his foreleg. Then he froze. In the deep shadows of the woods at the edge of his family’s yard he’d seen something. Just for a split second he could have sworn that something had moved. He blinked and then narrowed his eyes. Had it really been there? He could have sworn that it had… some hulking shadow that swiftly moved among the shadows in the gaps between the trees. He swallowed. It could be a wolf or even a bear, he supposed. He turned his head and called “Mom? Dad?” over his shoulder. Then he turned back. Hoofprints. Hoofprints in the snow leading from the woods toward the house. But they only went part way through the snow before abruptly stopping, leaving the snow unbroken. And then he noticed that the branch of the try nearby was bouncing up and down in the same way it did when a bird landed on it or took off from it. Could something have run out of the woods and… and jumped to the tree? That’s nearly fifty feet! No way could any wolf or bear— He froze again. Between the creaking of the house, he thought he heard more noises. Were his parents coming now that he’d called them? But those sounds seemed to come not from the hall… but from the roof. He shivered, his eyes going wide. “Mom! Dad!” he called again. There was no reply, so he backed into the center of the room. A cloud passed in front of the moon again and the shadows all around him deepened. What’s out there? he wondered. Those hoofprints… they weren’t from a pony… they were cloven! But they were huge… way too big for a goat or anything like that! He nearly jumped out of his skin as he heard a knock on the door. “Son?” came his mother’s voice. “Sweetie, it’s late… what’s the matter?” With a heavy sigh of relief he ran to the door. “Mom! Mom! I saw something outside!” he turned the doorknob and threw wide the door. “I think it—” Red eyes. Red eyes that glowed in the darkness stared down at him. A scream rose in his throat as the thing standing there snatched him up. The next thing he knew, he saw a huge bag open up like a cavernous maw. In the dim light he saw the terrified faces of more foals before he was shoved inside with them and the mouth was drawn tight, leaving him in absolute darkness. Bon Bon awoke with a start. She couldn’t imagine why she’d suddenly had a nightmare about one of the old stories she’d heard as a filly. She supposed that it was because it was nearly Hearth’s Warming, which was when that ridiculous legend took place. Ridiculous… what sort of idiot would make up something so horrifying at Hearth’s Warming of all times? She felt a foreleg drape over her and a nuzzle on her cheek, and a soft voice whispered in her ear, “Good morning, Bon Bon…” She let out a sigh, letting her apprehension fade. “Good morning, Lyra,” she replied closing her eyes contentedly. As Lyra moved in closer, she suddenly sat up. “Eugh, Bon Bon, you’re all sweaty!” she exclaimed. “Were you running a marathon in your sleep or something?” Bon Bon made a face. “No, I just… had a bad dream,” she said. Lyra’s expression softened. “Oh. I’m sorry,” she said. “Do you want to talk about—” Bon Bon shook her head. “No, no, I’m fine. It was just some stupid dream.” Lyra smiled, using her magic to lift the covers and slide out of her side of the bed. “Well, tell you what,” she said, trotting over to Bon Bon’s side. “Why don’t you go shower up while I make breakfast.” Then she leaned down and kissed her on the forehead. “Happy Hearth’s Warming, by the way.” Bon Bon smiled. “Happy Hearth’s Warming, Lyra,” she replied. “All right, I’ll be down in a bit.” It was the morning before Hearth’s Warming. All around Ponyville, the houses were lit up and bright, the roofs were caked with thick, white snow, and everypony was done up in their best coats and scarves. Here and there, vendors sold hot cocoa or various holiday treats (Bon Bon herself supplied some of her best candies to several of them, in fact), and nearly every door was adorned with a wreath of pine. Families and friends carrying stacks of brightly-wrapped presents carried them house to house or loaded them onto carts to take the train to visit far-off relatives. The massive castle of the former Princess of Friendship which overlooked the town was beautifully decorated with glowing magical crystal by Starlight Glimmer as she prepared to host her first town-wide Hearth’s Warming party alongside her new vice headmare and guidance counselor, Sunburst and Trixie Lulamoon. The whole town was abuzz with the excitement of the holiday season, and, here and there, one could hear the songs of carolers braving the cold as their songs echoed throughout the streets. Inside Lyra and Bon Bon’s house, however, it was warm and cozy. A fire crackled in the fireplace as Bon Bon brought out a tray with two mugs of hot cocoa. One mug was a pale yellow with a handle colored in a helix pattern of blue and pink, while the other was mint green with a wispy white handle. “Custom-made personalized cocoa mugs: check!” she said to herself as she took a seat on the couch. “Lyra?” she called. “Cocoa’s ready!” “I’ll be right there!” Lyra called back. “Just hold on! ...Oh, and did you put—” “Two marshmallows in your cocoa instead of just one? Yes, of course I did!” She heard her laugh. “You know me so well!” “You know me so well!” Bon Bon smiled as she blew on her cocoa to cool it before taking a sip. She looked down at the coffee table in front of the couch. Between the two cocoa mugs was a partially-assembled jigsaw puzzle that, once completed, would form the image of the ponies from the First Hearth’s Warming legend. Chancellor Puddinghead was complete on one side; Commander Hurricane was as well on the other side. And just beyond the puzzle was a small framed picture of herself and Lyra in their wedding veils. It’s our first Hearth’s Warming together, Bon Bon marveled to herself. She grinned, mentally amending that it was their first Hearth’s Warming together as a married couple, not merely “best friends” (though they certainly were that). She felt a bit self-conscious about how something as simple as a ceremony and a couple of nice (if somewhat admittedly cheap) rings could change things. Ponies were used to seeing them together most of the time anyway, but since they’d gotten married the two had been more openly affectionate with one another. At one time, she’d have been annoyed with such displays, and yet Lyra’s giddy nuzzles and hugs and public cheek smooches were hard to resist reciprocating. Just the same, she hoped that things would calm down a bit after their first year together. It was a little embarrassing, even if she did enjoy the attention. “Ohhhh, darn it!” Lyra exclaimed. “Where are they?!” Bon Bon raised an eyebrow. “Lyra? Do you need help with something?” “No, it’s just… I was looking for something but… oh, where did I put them?!” Bon Bon started to get up, heaving a sigh. “Look, I’ll help you search if it’s that important—” “No!” Lyra cried suddenly. “I just… oh, for Celestia’s sake, never mind! I’ll just look for them later, I guess.” Lyra trotted down the stairs carrying a box with her magic, the golden glow of her magical aura levitating the box over to the floor. She removed the lid and lifted out two knit dolls with button eyes. “Oh, of course, our Hearth’s Warming dolls!” Bon Bon exclaimed as Lyra put them up on the mantle. The dolls, which looked exactly like the pair of them, slumped against each other for support. Just for good measure, Lyra posed them so that their plushy little forelegs were draped across each other’s shoulders. “Heh. You’re so sappy,” Bon Bon said, rolling her eyes. “Shh, they look cute,” Lyra said. “Now, let’s get to the cocoa and puzzle-solving!” Bon Bon nodded as she moved over to make room for Lyra. “Okay, if we can just find the right piece to go here… hey, wait a minute…” Lyra looked at her as she took a sip of cocoa. “What is it?” Bon Bon stroked her chin. “You said you were looking for something but couldn’t find it… but then you came down with our Hearth’s Warming dolls.” Lyra nodded. “And?” she asked innocently. Too innocently. “Then these aren’t what you were looking for,” Bon Bon said, narrowing her eyes. “What exactly were you looking for, then?” Lyra blushed. “Oh! W-w-well, I… um…” Bon Bon crossed her forelegs. “Yeeeesssss?” Lyra refused to meet her eyes as she assumed the strange, upright posture she normally took when sitting. “Look, it’s… it’s not important.” “Lyra.” “Just forget about it.” “Lyra.” “Hey, did you add something to this cocoa? It’s really good!” she said, taking a quick sip and burning her tongue. “Lyyyyyyyyraaaaaaa!” Bon Bon groaned. “Okay, okay, jeez, you know I hate it when you do that!” she exclaimed. “The truth is that I got us something special, but for some reason I can’t remember where I put it! I’m sure I’ll remember later, but I don’t want to tell you now and ruin the surprise!” Bon Bon pursed her lips. “It’s not expensive?” Lyra shook her head. “It’s not… embarrassing?” “Nope!” Lyra replied. “It’s not… it’s not human related, is it?” Bon Bon asked cautiously. Lyra scowled. “No. No, it is not,” she said. “Not that there’s anything wrong with my hobby, for the record.” Bon Bon sighed. “Okay, okay, fine, I’ll drop it for now,” she said. Then, softening, she gestured toward the puzzle. “So… any ideas which two pieces go together?” Lyra relaxed and looked over the pieces. “Well,” she said, levitating two pieces and fitting them together, “if we put these two here…” “...Just a few more pieces,” Bon Bon said, grinning triumphantly. “Ha! No puzzle can beat us!” Lyra declared, mockingly holding up a hoof as she looked to the heavens (or at least the ceiling). “Oh, by the way, what do you think we should bring to the big Hearth’s Warming party?” Bon Bon froze. “Oh… the party?” she asked slowly. Lyra nodded. “Yeah, you know,” she said as she examined another puzzle piece. “The big one at Twilight’s old castle? I mean, I know she won’t be there because she’s hosting events in Canterlot and most of her friends will be joining her for her first year as reigning Princess, but Starlight’s actually pretty nice! And besides, a lot of our other friends here in Ponyville will be there too! Doctor Whooves, Octavia, Derpy… oh, and I hear Berry Punch is bringing her special eggnog…” Lyra turned to wink knowingly at Bon Bon only to see that she was looking away. “Bon Bon? Is something wrong?” “No, no, not exactly,” Bon Bon said. “I just… well, I was thinking we could… um… maybe, kind of…” “‘Um, maybe, kind of…’ what, exactly?” Lyra asked, raising an eyebrow. “S… skip the party?” Bon Bon asked quietly. “WHAAAAAAAAAT?!” Lyra shrieked. “B-but… but it’s one of the biggest parties of the year!” “That’s kind of relative considering Pinkie Pie lives here,” Bon Bon remarked. “But it’s our first time going together as a married couple!” “Yes, and, well, I thought maybe we could just enjoy our time alone together!” Bon Bon said. She offered Lyra a weak smile. “Come on, that could be fun too!” “Sure, but this would be like the third party we’ve skipped because you wanted to stay in!” Lyra cried. “And that was fine… well, actually,” she chuckled, blushing slightly, “it was more than fine…” “Heh. Heck yeah it was,” Bon Bon added. Lyra shook her head, remembering the point she was making. “But those were minor events. This is Hearth’s Warming! It’s only once a year! And almost everypony in town is going! Cranky Doodle and Matilda are going! Seriously… Cranky. Doodle! He almost never goes out! Why the hay would we stay in?!” “Look, I just… y-you know I still prefer small gatherings,” Bon Bon stammered. “And what’s more, you get extra affectionate when you have too much hard cider or, in this case, eggnog.” “Affectionate?” Lyra asked. “And, you know, besides all the extra excitement, the way you hang onto me can sometimes get a bit… you know…” She cleared her throat and quietly added “...embarrassing.” Lyra blinked. She lowered her head. “Oh.” She got up from the couch. “I see…” Bon Bon swallowed. “Lyra—” “No, no, I get it,” she said, picking up her cocoa mug, refusing to meet her eyes. “I mean, we’re newlyweds, so most ponies understand if I’m a little affectionate, but sure, if you’re embarrassed…” “Lyra.” “...sure, sure, we’ll just spend another night at home and settle into our life of no social interaction before we take on the role of being the most dull ponies in Equestria!” “Lyyyyyyyyraaaaaaa!” “And cut that out!” Lyra shouted, whirling around on her. “You can’t just get your way every single time you do that!” Bon Bon sighed. “Okay, okay, fine,” she said. “Look, you know because of all that time I spent as a… you know…” “Secret agent,” Lyra said bluntly. “Shhh!” Bon Bon hissed. “But yes, that. The point is, I prefer to blend into a crowd if I have to be in one at all. Thanks to you, I’ve opened up a bit… but the way you act makes me feel like everypony’s staring at us!” “Oh please, nopony cares!” Lyra groaned, rolling her eyes. “I do!” Bon Bon shouted. Lyra gave a start, but then lowered her gaze, her ears drooping. “Oh. Okay,” she muttered. Bon Bon felt a pang of guilt seeing Lyra’s reaction. She grit her teeth and shut her eyes. Finally she heaved a long sigh. “You know what… never mind,” she said. She looked back at Lyra and smiled. “If it means that much to you - and if you promise to show a little restraint - then fine, I’ll go to the party.” Lyra perked up immediately. “You will! And we can bake something to bring for it!” “I… oh, sure, why not?” “Yay!” Lyra exclaimed, kicking her forelegs gleefully before pouncing on Bon Bon. “Oh, thank you thank you thank you!” she cried, eagerly planting kisses all over her cheek. “Ahhh, Lyra, stop!” Bon Bon shouted. “For pony’s sake, this is what I’m talking about!” Just then, there was a knock on the door. “Carolers!” a decidedly gruff voice called. The voices began to sing: “Ponies' voices fill the night Hearth's Warming Eve is here once again Happy hearts so full and bright Hearth's Warming Eve is here once again…” Lyra and Bon Bon exchanged a look. “That’s the worst…” Bon Bon began. “...most monotone singing you’ve ever heard?” Lyra finished. “Yeah… if they want some cookies or cider, they’re more likely to get a rotten tomato with that kind of singing.” “Well, lucky for them, we’re out of tomatoes,” Bon Bon said with a smirk. “Oh well, let’s indulge them.” They went to the door and opened it. Then they all froze. The three ponies standing there were all in green, elvish costumes with conical hats, but they were also all wearing black shades and matching black ties. And even with the silly costumes, they recognized them immediately. “Wait… Agent Furlong?!” Bon Bon cried to the tall unicorn at the center of the trio. “Ha-ha-ha,” Furlong laughed mechanically. “Who is this ‘Agent Furlong’ you’re talking about? We are just three perfectly nondescript carolers hoping to be invited in for some… some…” One of the other ponies whispered in his ear. He nodded. “...Snickerdoodles. May-we-please-come-in, strangers??” Bon Bon nodded and invited the trio in. “Oh my gosh, Agent Furlong, Bravo, Foxtrot!” Lyra exclaimed. “How nice, you came to visit for Hearth’s Warming! Oh, Agent Furlong, did you get that Hearth’s Warming card we sent you?” Furlong raised a bushy eyebrow. “Yes, Agent Heartstrings, I did,” he growled. “But I would remind you that such interpersonal communications are frowned on in S.M.I.LE.” “You sent him a card?” Bon Bon asked incredulously. “Well, sure!” Lyra replied. “You signed it!” “You just told me it was to a friend! You never said who it was!” “Oh come on, it was the least we could do after he sent us that nice card for our wedding!” Lyra said, waving a hoof dismissively. Foxtrot and Brave gave Furlong a sideways glance. “You sent them a card, Chief?” Foxtrot asked. “That’s classified,” he said, refusing to meet his eyes. “Wait, when did he send us a card?” Bon Bon asked. “Oh, he didn’t sign it, but I knew it was him from the plain white card with the simple black text and the fact that the note said ‘Sorry I couldn’t make it to Fillyville for your wedding. Signed, A friend.’ No other friend of ours keeps getting Ponyville’s name wrong like that.” Furlong heaved a sigh. “Agents, we need to change the subject,” he said gruffly. “Like maybe addressing why exactly you’re here?” Bon Bon asked, narrowing her eyes. “Exactly, Agent Drops,” Furlong said. “Do you kids remember when we sent you both to Appleoosa to search for changelings?” “I sure do!” Lyra exclaimed. “Bon, er, Agent Sweetie Drops—” she ‘surreptitiously’ winked at Bon Bon (who immediately smacked her own forehead with her hoof) “—convinced you to let me join SMILE, a.k.a. the Secret Monster Intelligence League of Equestria, rather than having my memory magically erased after she revealed that she used to be a secret agent.” “Correct, Agent Heartstrings,” Furlong said with a brief nod. “And, as compensation for her cooperation and in recognition of your fine work in Appleoosa, we allowed you both to remain in Fillyville with the understanding that we may call on you both at some point in the future.” Foxtrot held up his communicator watch. “Come in, Blue 13, this is Red 11: the Exposition Train has left the station. Repeat, the Exposition Train has left the station. Over.” “Copy that, Red 11,” said a voice over the watch. “The lampshade has been hung. Over.” “Riiiight,” Bon Bon said, “so, again… why are you here, Chief?” Furlong lowered his shades to look Bon Bon right in the eye. “Agent Drops, we’ve received word of sightings of… the Krampus.” Bon Bon’s eyes went wide. She felt her knees buckle. “Th-the what?!” “Ooh, I’ve never heard of that!” Lyra exclaimed, zipping over to her side. “What’s a Clampus?” “It’s Krampus, Agent Heartstrings,” Furlong said. “Foxtrot, the dossier.” Foxtrot removed a manila folder from inside his silly elf costume and gave it to Lyra. Inside was a brief sheet with several sketches of some tall, hairy monster with horns and goat-like cloven hooves. It carried a bundle of sticks and a sack that appeared to be filled to the brim with terrified fillies and colts. Lyra’s grin grew even broader. “Oh wow, that looks scary, doesn’t it Bon Bon?” She shoved the picture into Bon Bon’s face. “See? See how scary it looks?” Bon Bon whimpered. “I know, right!” Lyra said. Then, seeing the stern look from Furlong, she cleared her throat and forced herself to stop smiling. “Ahem. So, Chief, what’s the deal with our perp? Gimme the skinny, lay it on me, give us the lowdown.” Furlong rolled his eyes. “Agent Drops, would you care to enlighten your partner? You seem to be familiar with the creature.” Bon Bon swallowed. “Oh… w-well, not really, Chief,” she said. “I just heard a few stories as a filly. Probably an exaggeration, right?” “Honestly, we don’t have much more to go on,” Furlong said. “There’s more detail in the dossier, but I’ll give you the gist of it: “Agents, the Krampus was supposedly a tall, goat-like bipedal creature with brown hair and burning red eyes. It was something like a dark reflection of Santa Hooves.” Lyra giggled. “Santa Hooves? That’s a bit foalish, don’t you think?” “DON’T TALK SMACK ABOUT SANTA HOOVES, AGENT HEARTSTRINGS!” Furlong bellowed, silencing her instantly. As all the ponies present stared at him, he blushed and adjusted his tie under his elf costume. “As I was saying,” he went on once he’d composed himself, “the Krampus supposedly went around on Hearth’s Warming Eve, just like Santa Hooves. Only instead of rewarding good fillies and colts with treats and toys, he would find naughty foals and hit them with a bundle of sticks or scoop them up and shove them in a large sack he carried on his back to take them away, though nopony is exactly sure what happens to them after that. Incidental information tells us he can ‘smell’ your misdeeds and, just by looking at you, can tell exactly what you’ve done. “In all honesty, if we could replicate the creature’s abilities, he’d be a great interrogator,” he added. “Ugh,” Lyra said. “Who just goes around whipping other ponies’ children? Or putting them in a bag and abducting them? Even if it’s just a story, why even tell foals something this scary? It’s the kind of thing that might traumatize a kid into adulthood!” “Yeah, tell me about it!” Bon Bon said, her eyes still wide as she began sweating. “Well, we believe it’s more than just a story, Heartstrings,” Furlong said. “The Krampus seems to have disappeared a few centuries ago so our overall records are spotty at best, but we’ve received additional information from the Royal Guard, the Night Guard, and Celestia herself. From what we can gather, the Krampus is powerful, fast, and surprisingly stealthy. We’ve even got reports of resistance to magic. Whatever the case, though, given the sightings we’ve seen, we believe the Krampus could be making a comeback. The modern world has no tolerance for the Krampus’s breed of “discipline,” so it’s for this reason, Agents, that we want you two to be on the lookout for him. If you see him, report the sighting immediately and try to locate his hideout. If possible or absolutely necessary, you are to capture the creature so he can be brought to SMILE HQ and contained.” Bon Bon blanched. “You want us to catch the Krampus?!” she cried. “I did say ‘if possible or necessary,’” Furlong said, “but yes.” “Sounds exciting!” Lyra exclaimed, putting her foreleg over Bon Bon’s shoulders. Bon Bon bit her lip, thinking quickly. “W-well, I mean, normally we would,” she said, pulling Lyra in close. “However, as you can tell, we’re now a married couple eager to spend our first Hearth’s Warming together and we made plans, so it’s, uh, not… not a good time!” Furlong, Foxtrot, and Bravo all exchanged a look. Furlong heaved a sigh. “Oh, well, if it’s like that, Agent Sweetie Drops, then I guess it can’t be helped…” Bon Bon brightened. Whoa, she thought, did that actually work? “I guess we’ll just tell the Krampus that he’ll have to come back another time when it’s more convenient for us to capture him,” Furlong said, rolling his eyes. “It’s a Hearth’s Warming-themed monster, Agent Drops! This is literally the only time when we’re likely to see it for the whole year!” Bon Bon visibly sagged. “Oh, horse apples.” “Well, it’s a shame we’ll miss the Hearth’s Warming party,” Lyra sighed. “But then again, hunting a holiday-themed monster with my best friend and life partner sounds exciting too!” At this, Foxtrot raised an eyebrow. “Chief,” he said, “might I suggest that Agents Drops and Heartstrings go to this Hearth’s Warming party anyway? It would help them blend in and potentially monitor the situation at the same time.” Furlong nodded. “Good thinking, Agent Foxtrot,” he grunted. “All right, Agent Drops, looks like you kids are going to the party after all. If you’re lucky, the Krampus won’t even show up.” “You think?” Bon Bon asked hopefully. “Given this town’s reputation for attracting all kinds of monsters and mischief… I wouldn’t place any bets.” “Sweet!” Lyra exclaimed. “A party and monster-hunting! This is going to be the most exciting Hearth’s Warming ever!” Bon Bon grit her teeth. “Try to take this seriously, Heartstrings,” Furlong admonished. “Keep your eyes and ears clear, and stay off the eggnog and mulled cider. You are not to let the Krampus slip through your hooves. Now, if you’ll excuse us, we have to continue our mission.” “Gotcha, Chief,” Bravo said, raising his watch communicator. “Blue 13, this is Red 12. Operation Figgy Pudding is a go. The coal is in the stocking. Over.” “We read you, Red 12. Proceed to next location for Operation Fruitcake. Over and out.” “Well, good luck, you kids,” Furlong said, offering a brief salute as he and the other ‘carolers’ exited the house and went down the street singing the worst version of “Little Drummer Colt” either of them had ever heard. Lyra was practically dancing on her hooves. “O.M.Goodness, Bon Bon, this is going to be so great!” “Yeah… great,” Bon Bon grumbled. Lyra finally took notice of her unease. “Bon Bon? Is something wrong?” “No, no, of course not,” Bon Bon said, rolling her eyes. “It’s just that instead of the quiet night at home with my wife that I wanted, I’ve got both socialization and monster-hunting on my schedule, and I’m honestly not sure which is worse!” Lyra’s ears drooped. “Oh,” she said. “Sorry, Bon Bon, I just—” “It doesn’t matter,” Bon Bon said. She offered Lyra a weak smile, adding, “Since we’ve got no choice, I guess we should make the best of things. And hey, we have a while before it gets dark and we have to be ‘on duty’ anyway.” Lyra perked up. “You’re right!” “So we can just spend time together—” “—Getting ready to take that Krampus down!” Lyra exclaimed. “Ooh, ooh, let’s get out some of your old spy stuff!” With that, she ran upstairs, leaving Bon Bon alone in the living room. She groaned. “Ugh… just when I think I’m out, they pull me back in…” Author's Note Just as a brief note of credit, Agent Furlong, S.M.I.L.E. and the associated characters and situations were taken from the MLP book by G.M. Berrow. It's a cute, fun read, especially for younger fans, so check it out sometime if you're of a mind to!
Part IIBon Bon found Lyra pulling boxes out of their shared closet. “Let’s see, grappling hook, sunglasses, fake mustache, extra fake mustaches, a guide on Manehattan accents…” Lyra giggled. “It’s pretty funny going through all this stuff again,” she said. “I think I’d talked to you at least three times when I moved to Ponyville and you had a different voice every time!” Bon Bon blushed. “I was figuring out my character!” she protested. “Oh, here we go!” Lyra said, bringing out box tied with a red ribbon. “These are just what we need to face down a monster!” She opened the box, revealing what appeared to be an assortment of different candies and treats. “Your trick candy weapons!” Bon Bon raised an eyebrow as she looked at them. She’d studied alchemy in her early years and used it to help develop candy-based weapons that had served her well in the field: exploding Pop Rocks, taffy that served as a sticky snare, a red hot that could literally heat itself to become red hot, a kinetic jawbreaker that amplified momentum when thrown to where it could literally break a pony’s jaw, and so on. “I think we might be over-preparing here, Lyra,” Bon Bon said. “I mean, think about it: even if this creature is real, the last time it was seen was centuries ago, and we’d have to be unlucky enough to have it appear in Ponyville as opposed to anywhere else in Equestria.” “Well, it never hurts to be prepared!” Lyra said. “That’s what I learned in the Filly Guide scouts! You know, I think I even have my old uniform… I wonder if it still fits me.” Bon Bon paused for a moment to think about how Lyra would look in said uniform… Hey Bon Bon… I heard you like cookies. But I’ve got an even better snack for you... “Bon Bon, why is your face turning red?” Bon Bon shook her head, clearing the mental image away. “Never mind,” she said. “Look, we’re going to a Hearth’s Warming party. We don’t need to bring all this stuff with us or it’ll look out of place. Or worse, some pony will try to eat it and get clobbered. Let’s just keep an eye out for the monster and if it appears, we can just report it to SMILE and let them take care of it.” Lyra frowned. “Oh. Well, I guess that makes sense, sure,” she said. “I mean, it would be better if we didn’t have to put ourselves in danger.” Bon Bon let out a sigh, breathing more easily for the first time since Furlong showed up. “Good. I’m glad to hear you agree.” Lyra looked down at the trick candy once more. “Although… well, we could stuff some of it in our scarves or coats or something just to be safe.” Bon Bon rolled her eyes. “Fine, I guess that would be okay if it comes to that,” she said. “Just the same, I hope we don’t run into it.” As she turned to go, Lyra suddenly placed her hoof on her shoulder. “Hm?” Bon Bon said, turning to face her. Lyra was looking at her with obvious concern. “I didn’t pick up on it because I was in the moment before,” she said, “but… you’re really scared, aren’t you?” “M-me?” Bon Bon laughed, not meeting her eyes. “No! No, of course not! I… it’s just some stupid legend that probably isn’t real anyway! Why would I—” Lyra placed her hoof on Bon Bon’s chin, gently guiding her to meet her gaze. “Bon Bon,” she said calmly, “it’s okay. You can tell me. You can trust me completely. We’re going to spend the rest of our lives together now, so there’s no reason to keep it a secret.” Bon Bon felt a lump in her throat as she smiled at her. “Ha… yeah, you’re right. I’m sorry, Lyra. Listen, it’s not like it’s a huge deal, but… when I was very young and misbehaved, my grandmare would try to scare me straight by telling me stories about the Krampus. She used to say ‘Dearie, if you are good, then Santa Hooves will bring you wonderful gifts on Hearth’s Warming… but if you are bad, then the Krampus will come in the middle of the darkest time of night, drag you from your warm bed, and whip you with his sticks for being naughty. Or he might even put you in his bag with all the other naughty foals and take you away. You wouldn’t want that, would you?’” She shuddered at the memory. “I thought her stories were just an old mare trying to scare a willful filly into behaving herself. This time of year I always think about her stories, though, and now that I know it’s real… or might be real, I guess it’s got me a little spooked. Maybe some part of me is just scared that my luck has finally run out and the Krampus is finally coming for me.” Lyra drew her in close in a tight embrace. “Shh,” she said gently, patting her on the back. “That monster isn’t interested in you. It’s only after naughty foals, not - heh - semi-naughty mares. And even if he were, he’d have to get through me to get to you. And if he knows what’s good for him, he’ll think twice before messing with my girl.” Bon Bon had to chuckle as she returned the hug, feeling Lyra’s warmth and the brush of her short mane against her cheek. With a reluctant sigh she let her go, stepping back. “Yeah, you’re right… okay, we’ll take just a few things and keep an eye out, and I’ll stop freaking out about this monster. Fillyhood legends or not, the Krampus is just like any other monster, and I’m not about to let any monster get the best of me yet!” “That’s the spirit!” Lyra cheered. “So… we’ve got a few hours before the party… you think we should…” Bon Bon grinned slyly. “Ohhhh yeah…” Lyra returned the sly grin. “Heh heh… alllll riiight…” She leaned in closer, and in a sultry voice whispered: “Gingerbread ponies.” Bon Bon blinked. “What.” “Gingerbread ponies!” she exclaimed. “You know, for the party! You make the best ones in Ponyville!” Bon Bon forced a smile. “Yes. Baking cookies. Ssssure, that’s… that’s just what I felt like doing now. I’ll go get the ingredients ready…” As she left, Lyra eyed the trick candies. If she knew Bon Bon (and she certainly did), in this state of mind she’d take only the bare minimum, if any at all, just to reinforce her assertion that they wouldn’t need them. Lyra, however, wasn’t quite so certain that the evening would be a quiet one. Just to be safe, she took a few of the candies and shoved them into her mane. She was no Pinkie Pie, but she was no amateur at smuggling such things in her mane when the need arose, after all. The party at Twilight’s old castle (nopony was quite used to calling it “Starlight’s castle” yet) was in full swing with music, food and drink, and dancing. Lyra and Bon Bon’s cookies were an instant hit and quickly vanished from the hors d'oeuvres table. Still, Bon Bon couldn’t help but notice that the turnout for the party was considerably lower than she’d expected. The last big party that Twilight had thrown at the castle - back when she’d first taken on Starlight as her student - had been a huge event with what seemed like the whole town in attendance. In contrast, this party seemed considerably more sparse. Judging by Starlight’s expression as she mingled, she’d noticed it as well. Bon Bon went to get more punch and passed by Roseluck and Derpy when she caught a bit of their conversation: “Oh where is he? I’m sure he said he’d be here!” Roseluck said, pouting. “You know Doc, Rose!” Derpy said with a shrug as she hovered unsteadily in the air. “He’s probably distracted with some experiment and lost track of time!” Bon Bon paused for a moment. Derpy was right: that did sound like something Doctor Hooves would do… but, then again, even if he could be a bit distractible, he was rarely this late to an event. And now that she thought about it, she’d heard quite a few other party guests make similar remarks about ponies they’d expected to be here, yet somehow had not arrived. “Bon Bon!” Lyra cried, trotting over to her. “Hey, come out to the balcony with me! There’s a great view!” Bon Bon frowned. “Not now, Lyra, I think there’s something strange going on here,” she said. But then Lyra leaned in close. “So do I,” she whispered, her happy demeanor momentarily dropping. “Seriously, come with me and take a look at this.” Bon Bon nodded, but then put on a happy face similar to Lyra’s as they made their way upstairs together and to the balcony. The view was indeed lovely, even if that had been Lyra’s excuse for dragging her out there. The stars were shining brightly in the night sky, and the whole town stretched out below, the snow-covered rooftops gently reflecting the moon’s glow. She had to admit, were it not for her misgivings about what was going on, the view would ordinarily be quite romantic. “Do you see it?” Lyra asked. Bon Bon squinted. “Um… sorry, what am I looking at?” Lyra rolled her eyes. “Okay, it’s Hearth’s Warming Eve, right?” she asked. “So what do ponies do to warm their hearths?” “Uh, put a log in the fireplace, of course,” Bon Bon replied. Then she noticed what Lyra meant. Anypony who wasn’t at this party would almost certainly be at home in front of the fireplace. And if they were burning a fire, then smoke would be rising from their chimney. And yet, for some strange reason, very few chimneys at all were smoking. “No chimney smoke… equals cold hearths… on Hearth’s Warming of all nights?” Bon Bon wondered aloud as she peered into the darkness. “You do see it!” Lyra exclaimed. “I was sure it wasn’t just my imagination, but if that’s the case…” As Lyra continued speculating to herself, Bon Bon scanned the horizon when she saw something that made her heart skip a beat and her breath catch in her throat. Eyes. Red eyes. For just a split second, she caught a glint of red and something large on top of one of the rooftops in the distance. Then it swiftly leapt from one rooftop to the next until she lost sight of it. Large. Fast. Red eyes. She pulled Lyra in close. “Huh? Bon Bon, uh, now’s probably not the time—” “Shh!” Bon Bon hissed, her mouth feeling very dry all of a sudden. “I think I saw something on the rooftops!” She related her description of what she’d just seen to Lyra, who suddenly seemed considerably less brave than she had been back at the house. Perhaps the reality of the situation was dawning on her. “Do you think it’s… the Krampus?” Lyra whispered. “I… I don’t know,” Bon Bon whispered back. “But let’s go check it out. We need to confirm what we saw before we report to SMILE.” The pair quickly snuck out of the party and into the cold, darkened streets of Ponyville. It wasn’t until they got further away from the castle that they realized how quiet the streets actually were. Nothing could be heard save for their hooves hitting the ground and the sound of their own breathing. “Keep looking up,” Bon Bon whispered. “It might still be on the rooftops.” “Right,” Lyra said, casting her eyes upward. They strained their ears, listening for the slightest sound that might clue them in to the monster’s location. Okay, Bon Bon, she told herself, just stay calm. Try to think… if it really is the Krampus, then why does it seem like adult ponies are going missing? According to the legends and all the stories I’ve been told, the Krampus only goes after naughty foals, not full-grown ponies! Just then, they heard a sound behind them. They whirled around and saw that snow had fallen from the rooftop into the alleyway behind them. Bon Bon looked up and saw a large, shadowy figure quickly bounding away, back and forth between rooftops. For its size, it was remarkably nimble and practically invisible in the darkness. “After it!” Bon Bon shouted. The two broke into a gallop, barely able to keep track of the creature, but then they realized where it was going: the castle. “It’s heading for the party!” she exclaimed. Lyra smirked. “And it wasn’t even invited!” she quipped. “Lyra, this is no time for cheesy one-liners, our friends could be in danger!” “Hey, just trying to lighten the mood,” Lyra grumbled. By the time they got to the castle, it was already apparent that things had gone south. The front doors had been pulled clean off their hinges and screams could be heard from inside. “Should we radio for backup?” Lyra asked as they approached the entrance. “No time!” Bon Bon shouted. “If it’s bold enough to attack all these ponies, then we’ve got to take the chance to stop it now!” As they entered, the scene was pure chaos. lights and decorations had been torn from walls, half-finished plates of hors d'oeuvres were strewn on the floor, and the music had gone silent, the speakers toppled over and broken. “Well, so much for Starlight’s first Hearth’s Warming party,” Lyra sighed. “It’s too bad… it was going pretty well up until it was attacked by the Krampus.” “We need to confirm that it is the Krampus first,” Bon Bon said. “Perhaps I can be helping with this, yes?” The two mares froze. They looked up in the direction of the voice and saw the speaker leaning over the railing of the upper level. The creature was large, stocky, and covered in brown fur. He wore a dull brown jacket over a red sweater and had large, pointed ears as well as a pair of upwardly curving horns. His eyes were completely blood red and his grin revealed two little fangs. An enormous sack was slung across his back and it appeared to be moving as numerous muffled voices inside cried out. The creature casually held a bundle of sticks in one hoof-like hand while he munched on a candy cane with the other. “Greetings,” he said. “I am Krampus. You are Miss Lyra Heartstrings and - heh - Miss Bon Bon, yes? I am glad you have come… it saves me trouble of coming to collect you two later.” “Take this, you fiend!” a voice shouted. They looked and saw Trixie run at the Krampus as she lobbed a smoke bomb at him. The Krampus momentarily disappeared in a large cloud of smoke before he simply inhaled it all, his cheeks puffing outwards. As Trixie skidded to a halt in front of him, he belched out the smoke at her, causing her to first scream, then choke as the smoke enveloped her. The Krampus chomped on the last bits of his candy cane before reaching into the smoke and plucking out a still-coughing Trixie. “Silly unicorn,” he chided. “I have plunged down lit chimneys before. Your smoke is minor annoyance at best.” Trixie stared back with terrified eyes. “Please don’t eat me,” she whimpered. The Krampus sniffed. “No promises,” he said. “Into sack with you!” Trixie screamed as the Krampus swiftly opened the sack on his back and deposited her inside, drawing it shut just as quickly. “Now, where were we?” the Krampus said, looking back down at Lyra and Bon Bon, his grin widening. Just then, a powerful beam of magic blasted him in the face. “Give her back!” They again looked up into the center of the room and saw Starlight Glimmer levitating with her own magic, her aura enveloping her entire body. Her eyes were aflame and her teeth were clenched tightly as she stared down at the monster. “Give all my friends back, you monster!” she screamed, firing another beam at the Krampus. This time the Krampus simply held up a hand, blocking the bolt with ease. Then he rubbed his jaw, a look of annoyance on his hairy face. “Bah. Naughty unicorns come out in droves today,” he said. “Your magic is like buzzing of flies to me, Starlight Glimmer. But I am glad you have stopped hiding. Now you will answer for all your sins…” Starlight gasped as the Krampus leaped over the railing with lightning-quick speed and swatted her out of the air with his bundle of sticks. She landed roughly on the castle floor and tried to get to her hooves in a daze as the Krampus landed behind her. The Krampus yanked her up by her tail, and swatted her across the backside with the bundle of sticks, causing her to shriek in pain and surprise. “You have been very-” WHACK “-naughty-” WHACK “-pony!” WHACK “Ow ow ow!” Starlight screamed, her face red with a mixture of rage and embarrassment. “What in Celestia’s name is wrong with you?! I’m not some misbehaving foal!” “No,” the Krampus said gravely, his eyes narrowing. “You much worse. But we chit-chat later.” With a final yell of angry protest, Starlight was likewise stuffed into the Krampus’s giant bag. “Okay,” Bon Bon said, her voice wavering, “we just saw one of the most powerful unicorns in Equestria blast him right in the face and he shrugged it off like a stiff breeze… we are so dead.” “Well, maybe he’s impervious to magic,” Lyra said, pawing the ground with her hoof as she prepared to charge at the monster, “but we’ve got some tricks up our sleeves too. Or, better yet,” she said, reaching into the pink scarf she wore around her neck, “in our scarves!” Before Bon Bon could react, she ran at the Krampus and used her magic to remove a taffy piece from her scarf and throw it at him. The taffy burst into several large, sticky strands that wrapped around the beast, binding his arms and legs. “Oh?” he asked, surprised but still obviously unconcerned. “What is this? You fight Krampus with snack foods? Heh. Quite amusing.” “How’s this for amusing?!” Lyra shouted, taking the kinetic jawbreaker from her scarf and flinging it at the Krampus’s head. The Krampus reacted quickly, catching the projectile in his teeth. The little piece of candy continued spinning, creating sparks as it strained against the grip of his jaws. Once it finally lost its momentum, however, the Krampus simply moved it to his back teeth and crushed it in one bite. “Ooh, this one had layers. I should know not to try to eat in one bite, but I can never help myself. Now,” he said, casually snapping the taffy strands as he stepped towards them both, “will you two come like nice little fillies? Or perhaps you are wanting to keep doing things the hard way?” Lyra gulped. “B-Bon Bon, I could use some backup!” But Bon Bon found that she was frozen to the spot. Despite the creature’s almost cuddly appearance and easy-going demeanor, it was still the legendary creature from her grandmare’s stories, the creature of her nightmares, and it was seemingly unstoppable. “Bon Bon!” Lyra’s voice finally snapped her out of it and she reached into her own scarf for a weapon. The Krampus sighed. “Hard way it is,” he muttered. He sprang forward and grabbed Lyra by the neck with one hand and ripped her scarf off her neck with the other, spilling the candy-themed weapons all over the floor. “No! Put her down!” Bon Bon screamed, and threw a hoof-ful of exploding Pop Rocks at the beast. He was showered in a series of tiny explosions, each of which left a bit of soot on his clothes and face and stung more than he would have liked to admit. “Bah! Tricks are no longer amusing!” he growled, opening his sack. “Bon Bon, hel—” Lyra shouted as she was stuffed inside. “You monster, you let them go!” Bon Bon shouted, throwing weaponized candy piece after piece as the Krampus stomped over to her. Hot, angry tears spilled onto her cheeks as he shrugged off each attack until he stood directly in front of her. As she stared up at him, his eyes seemed to glow, and she felt as though his gaze was peering into the very depths of her being. “Ah. Your grandmare… she told you about me, yes?” he asked. “Few ponies these days remember Krampus. I make sure they never forget. All ponies soon fear me like you do, little earth pony.” “I’m…” Bon Bon swallowed, shaking with anger as she stared up at him. “I’m not afraid of you.” The Krampus sniffed. Then he took a deep breath and roared at her, his fur-covered face momentarily distorting into a horrific, batlike visage as his piercing shriek shook her to her very bones and flecks of his spittle sprayed her on the face. She felt her legs give out and she stared up at the Krampus in wide-eyed terror. “Hmph. Naughty little liar,” the Krampus grunted, picking her up by the scruff of her neck as he pulled open the sack. “You join your lovey dove now.” Bon Bon felt herself being carried over the creature’s head, narrowly missing his horns as she stared into the depths of the massive burlap sack. Dozens of ponies stared up at her, their eyes constricting in the sudden light. Among them, near the top, she saw Lyra reaching out for her. She felt Lyra’s forelegs embrace her as she was shoved inside, and then the bag was cinched shut, sealing them all in darkness. “Ugh, could you move your leg?” “Sorry, it’s cramped in here!” “Where is this monster taking us?!” Amid the chattering of the ponies inside the sack, Lyra gently stroked Bon Bon’s mane as she tried to calm her down. “Hey, just relax, Bon Bon,” she said softly. “After all, now we can track this monster to his lair!” Bon Bon glared at her. In the very dim light, she saw Lyra’s sheepish smile. “W-well, sure it’s not quite how we planned, but at least we’re on the right track!” “Hey, I just thought of something!” Rose exclaimed from somewhere below them. “Maybe Starlight can use her magic to cut a hole in the sack or teleport us out!” “Sorry,” Starlight said, “but I - ow - I tried that already. This sack may look like a normal burlap sack, but it’s obviously enchanted. Somehow it’s dampening everypony’s magic; I can’t cast even a single spell!” “Well, what is this ugly thing and where is it taking us?!” Trixie demanded. “It’s called the Krampus,” Sunburst said. “I’ve read old legends about it before. It’s supposed to appear around Hearth’s Warming - or at least it used to - and what it does with ponies it takes away varies from legend to legend. Some say that it drowns them in a river—” Several ponies gasped. “—or takes them to Tartarus—” More ponies gasped, this time more loudly than before. “—or just eats them!” Another round of gasping. “Okay, okay, yes, thank you, Sunburst,” Starlight said hurriedly. “Look, if we all remain calm, I’m sure we’ll either figure a way out of this or somepony else will come to save us.” “Yes, well, perhaps it would accept payment or perhaps a ransom,” said a snooty, muffled voice from the very bottom of the sack. “Hey, is that Spoiled Rich?” Lyra asked. “Yes, and for some reason this revolting beast picked me up first, which is why I’m on the bottom of this horrible pile. When my husband hears of this indignity, heads will roll!” she declared, her voice somehow finding its way up through the tangled living mass of ponies piled on top of her. “And speaking of indignity, will whoever’s on top of me kindly move his posterior off my head!” “SORRY!!” Bulk Biceps shouted. Lyra looked down and saw a red and green glow on Bon Bon’s watch. “HQ, HQ, come in!” she whispered. “This is Agent Sweetie Drops! Agent Heartstrings and I have been discovered! We need back up!” The watch was silent. Not even static could be heard, which meant that the signal was completely dead, the magical link between it and SMILE HQ was cut off, just like Starlight’s magic. “HQ, come in! Can anypony read me? Come in!” “Bon Bon, that’s not going to work,” Lyra whispered back. “And keep your voice down. What about, you know, your secret identity.” “The hay with all that!” Bon Bon hissed. “We’re being dragged off to who-knows-where by my fillyhood nightmare! How could I possibly stay calm in this situation?!” “Well, at least the Krampus put us here together,” Lyra offered. “That just means that one of us can’t rescue the other! Ugh, see, this is why I just wanted to stay home tonight! No party, no adventure, and definitely no monster hunting!” “Bon Bon, come on, try to stay optimistic,” Lyra said. “Being negative won’t get us anywhere.” Bon Bon just grumbled. After a moment, Lyra snickered. “Hey, Bon Bon… Bon Bon… hey, Bon Bon…” Bon Bon ignored her, continuing to fume. “Bon Bon… hey, Bon Bon… Bon Bon, guess what?” “What?” Bon Bon asked through clenched teeth. Lyra leaned in close. “We’re - heh heh - we’re ‘in the sack’ together.” Bon Bon would have facehooved if she’d had room to do so. But soon Lyra’s snickering proved too much for her and she started laughing as well. “Well, I’m glad somepony’s having fun,” Starlight said, hearing them chuckling, “but maybe instead of complaining or joking around, we should come up with a plan together!” The mass of ponies was silent. Somepony coughed. “Uh, sorry, Starlight, but I’ve got nothing,” Trixie said. “Though, to be fair, it’s kind of hard to think when we’re all crammed in here like this.” “Oh come on!” Starlight exclaimed. “Sure it’s dark and cramped and - ow! - and hot and uncomfortable, but all of us in Ponyville have faced way worse than this! This is nothing!” Then somepony farted. As the bag erupted into chaos with groans, gags, and lots of accusatory yelling, Lyra wore a smile on her face. Despite their dire situation, she did have one more idea...
Part IIIA short while longer, the Krampus hummed a little tune and set down the bag, saying “Here we are: cavern sweet cavern!” His hoof-like hand reached into the sack and pulled them out one-by-one. Their momentary relief at no longer being confined quickly gave way to terror and struggling, but no amount of kicking, biting, or otherwise seemed to deter the Krampus. He reached in and pulled out Bon Bon, then Lyra and the two of them were tossed into black, bell-shaped cages that shut and locked behind them. Lyra looked and saw that, though they were in separate cages, fortunately they’d been placed right next to each other. “Are you okay, Bon Bon?” she asked. “Yes, but… Lyra, look!” Bon Bon said, her eyes wide as she took in their surroundings. Lyra looked as well and saw that they were in a massive cavern filled with cages similar to their own. The Krampus was going around and quickly filling them. Dozens and dozens of ponies from Ponyville were imprisoned here along with them. Starlight and Trixie and a few others immediately tried to teleport out or blast the lock off, but though their magic now worked, it could not penetrate outside the cage and merely dissipated once it hit the narrow bars. “You waste your time, ponies,” the Krampus chided, wagging a bony finger at them. “Cages are impervious to magic and too strong for earth ponies to kick open. Try if you must, but you will see that Krampus speaks the truth!” “What is the meaning of all this!” Starlight shouted. “Why did you bring us all here?!” The Krampus sniffed. “I take it you talk about me while in sack, yes?” he asked. “Then you know that I punish the naughty foals.” “But we’re not foals!” Trixie protested. “And we’re not naughty! ...You know, most of the time. Or at least not that naughty. Or at least not all of us are.” The Krampus grunted and smacked Trixie’s cage with his bundle of sticks. “You talk too much, little unicorn. But very well, if you want explanation, I give you one…” He waited until he had the rapt attention of all the ponies around the cavern. “Think he’ll break into a song?” Lyra whispered. “Shh!” Bon Bon hissed. “Long ago,” the Krampus began, “I was one of many creatures fashioned by the evil Grogar. He gave me such great powers, including ability to smell the sins of others, and the sight to see each misdeed. But I had no interest in terrifying ponies for Grogar, so I left to live alone in wilderness. For long time, it was just me. But then one day, strange visitor came to me. He called himself… Santa Hooves.” Spoiled Rich guffawed loudly. “You shut pointy snooty face or Krampus whip you so hard that little pony butt cheeks will resemble baboon’s!” he shouted, pointing his stick bundle at her. Spoiled fell silent, her mouth shut tight and her eyes bulging. “Now, where was I… ah, yes… “Santa Hooves learned of what I could do and took me to his toyshop in frozen north. He say that he want to reward good little fillies and colts with toys and treats on Hearth’s Warming, but he worry that maybe bad little fillies and colts need a bit more… motivation. So he take me in, we go out, and we visit all the little households. He fill good foals’ stockings; I make them fill their little drawers. Heh. All goes well for long, long time.” He paused, smiling. “Santa Hooves was Krampus’s first real friend. We make good team, and he let me stay in nice warm house, drink cocoa, and every Hearth’s Warming, we ride out to do our jobs. Never was I happier.” Then, slowly, the joy drained from his face, and he visibly sagged. “Then I think ‘What if scaring ponies and threatening with switch not enough? What if I give them real scare! That make them behave for sure!’ So, I start whipping across backsides. I threaten to eat, but I never actually do it! I start taking up the naughtiest ones in big sack. I become most terrifying monster in all of Equestria, and parents have me to thank for little ones behaving like little angels for rest of year!” He thumped his chest proudly. “But Santa Hooves is furious! He tell me that I cannot do these things anymore. I did not hit ponies too hard! I only take ponies in sack to scare them! Sometimes pretend to let them escape or just dunk in river and take right back home or threaten to eat if they do not change naughty ways… but Santa Hooves does not listen. We argue, have big fight and… and then…” He heaved a sigh. “And Krampus is no more. Krampus is no longer invited on Hearth’s Warming ride. I go back to wilderness to live alone once more.” “That’s really sad,” Lyra said. “Yes, naughty pony, it is,” the Krampus said, bowing his head. “But I always keep watch on Equestria. Mostly I just keep to myself, but then, in recent years, I see all these villains try to take it over! I wonder, ‘Where all these naughty villains coming from?’ And then I realize that nopony is afraid to grow up to be naughty any longer! Some one should bring back fear! “Now, by taking all these naughty ponies from one town, legend of Krampus will rise again!” he exclaimed, raising his arms triumphantly. “Children will grow up hearing tales of Krampus, and then no more villains will dare to be naughty ever again!” The cavern stared on in silence. “What?” the Krampus asked, looking around dejectedly. “No applause? Hmph, fine. Next time perhaps I should sing song.” “But wait just a second!” Sunburst shouted. “You say you want to punish ‘naughty ponies.’ Like Trixie said, we’re not bad ponies! Why punish us?” Krampus shook his head. “You think yourselves innocent? You are steeped in sins up to your fetlocks!” “What possible sins could you be speaking of, you horrid brute?!” Octavia shouted. “You want me to list them? In front of all other friends?” the Krampus asked. “Very well…” He pointed at Trixie. “Egocentrism and abuse of magical artifact!” He pointed at Bulk Biceps: “Improper volume control!” “I’M JUST EXUBERANT!” The Krampus began pointing at more of them. Doctor Hooves: “You forget important events because you are too busy in lab!” “B-but, my experiments—” At Derpy: “Carelessness with packages!” Derpy shrugged. “Everypony makes mistakes!” Octavia: “Snootiness!” “Well, I never!” Spoiled Rich: “Greedy elitist!” “Whatever the fine is, I’ll pay it!” Cranky Doodle: “Grouchiness!” “Oh, go soak your head! And couldn’t you find a bigger cage?!” Mud Briar: “Being a smarty-pants!” “Technically, the word is ‘pedantry.’” Maud Pie: “Liking this smarty-pants!” Maud looked over at Mud Briar and smirked. “That’s fair.” Then the Krampus looked over at Starlight Glimmer. “And you, Miss Starlight, are so naughty that I am ashamed that I didn’t come for you until now!” he yelled. “You are guilty of brainwashing, abuse of magic, and violating rules of time and space for petty revenge!” Starlight’s jaw dropped open. She sank to her haunches and lowered her head. “Hey, you leave her alone!” Trixie shouted. “Starlight’s changed! She’s done a lot of good things and more than made up for everything she did! Even Twilight Sparkle knows that she’s a changed pony, and - even if the Great and Powerful Trixie hates to admit it - she’s a great judge of character.” “Bah!” the Krampus grunted. “Sin is sin. If it is not punished, it still exists. Now, enough chit-chat… who is first to get backside paddled raw with sticks?” “Me!” Octavia shouted, raising a hoof. The entire cavern went silent. “Ah, that is… um…” Octavia trailed off, her face turning red. “Well, I guess we learned something new about her,” Bon Bon mumbled. “Whoa whoa whoa!” Lyra cried out. “All those things you talked about are things we’ve all moved on from! And most of them are just minor things! Nopony should be locked up for them!” The Krampus paused for a moment, then went over to her cage. “Sin is sin,” he growled. “Naughty is naughty. There is no ‘minor’ thing.” “You get away from her!” Bon Bon growled, reaching for him through the bars of her cage. “You two… you so cute and all lovey dovey,” he said, crossing his arms. “But you build your house on buried secrets. Bon Bon never told you, Lyra, about old life until she had to, yes? And still she keeps fears secret and even lies to herself about them. Perhaps if you had been honest, you would have prepared for me properly.” Bon Bon swallowed and looked down, knowing he was right. “But little sweet Lyra… you never tell your new wife that you keep sneaking bites of her candies or cupcake batter when she looks away…” Lyra blushed. “I… have a bit of sweet tooth, sure, but that’s—” “And you never tell her about Cloud Chaser.” Lyra froze. “Cloud Chaser?” Bon Bon asked. “Lyra… what is he talking about?” “Heh,” the Krampus sneered. “She—” “No!” Lyra said sternly. “I’ll tell her.” Bon Bon looked at her. Lyra felt a lump in her throat as she looked back into those deep, blue-green eyes. “I… well, about a month into our, uh, relationship back when I’d just moved to Ponyville… I kissed Cloud Chaser at a party.” Bon Bon blinked. “I… what?” “I’m sorry!” Lyra said. “It was just once, I’d had too much cider, I felt horrible about it and nothing else ever happened!” Bon Bon sighed. “I don’t really care about that, Lyra, not after all we’ve been through,” she said. “I just… I just wish you’d told me.” The Krampus snickered. “Ahh, you two really are perfect couple,” he said. “So close, and yet so many secrets hiding.” “Look, yes, I wish she’d told me,” Bon Bon said, “but now I know, and I’m not upset.” Lyra brightened. “You’re not?” “No, of course not!” she said. “So let her go! Do you understand? I don’t want her punished!” The Krampus tilted his head at her. “That is not important,” he said. “Only way to expunge your misdeeds is punishment.” He turned to the rest of the cavern, raising his voice. “But don’t worry, my little ponies… I am certain that I can properly punish you all and have you all back to your homes by, say, next Hearth’s Warming!” A chorus of protests went up at the thought of spending the next year locked up in this cavern. “Yes, yes, is very sad for you,” the Krampus said, rolling his eyes. “Ah, but I have lost track of time. Perhaps just one more run through Ponyville to collect more naughty ponies.” He picked up his sack and started toward the entrance. “Now don’t you naughty ponies go anywhere!” he laughed, dashing off into the night. As the cavern fell into a state of panic around them, Bon Bon slumped against the bars of her cage. “Great… just great,” she sighed, feeling a lump in her throat. “Our first married Hearth’s Warming… our first year of marriage… and we get to spend them locked up in a cage. Not even in the same cage! Oh… oh, Lyra, I’m so—wait, what the buck are you doing?!” Lyra appeared to be vigorously fluffing her mane, coming through it with her hooves like she had a bee in it. “Lyra, I hardly think this is the time for mane maintenance,” Bon Bon said. “Yeah, but it’s probably just the right time for an escape attempt,” she said, bringing out the candy piece she’d hidden in her mane, giving a sly wink. “Lyra! That caramel’s a plastique explosive!” Bon Bon gasped. “Exactly!” she said, wedging it into the lock. “Now, I think I can ignite it with my magic, since my magic still works inside the cage.” Her horn began to glow as she aimed it at the lock. “Okay, here goes…” The candy exploded with a sharp crack and the door to her cage flung open. All the cavern suddenly fell silent as they saw Lyra jump out onto the rocky floor. “I made it!” Everypony cheered loudly, turning the cavern into a cacophony. “Okay, Bon Bon, I just need to get you free next!” Lyra exclaimed. She searched around for something heavy to help break the lock on Bon Bon’s cage and found a large rock. She bashed it against the door several times, but succeeded only in breaking the stone to pieces while the door remained intact. “Lyra, listen,” Bon Bon said. “I’m not sure how long the Krampus will be gone. Here, take my watch communicator,” she said, passing it to her through the bars. “Go and try to radio for help. Bring everypony you can to come and save us!” “Me?!” Lyra exclaimed. “B-but I don’t want to just leave you here!” “The longer you take to escape, the more likely it is that the Krampus will catch you!” Bon Bon shouted. “Go!” “But—” “Go!!” Lyra hesitated for a moment more, her lower lip quivering, but then she turned and ran toward the mouth of the cavern, taking the watch communicator with her. Once outside, she saw that the cavern was deep inside a forest. A wild snowstorm was already in full force and fat snowflakes were swiftly covering the ground with a blanket of snow. She shivered in the cold and pressed the communicator. Static. She was too far out to get a signal. She wasn’t sure which way to go, but the worst place she could be was right there where the Krampus could find her. With no other choice, she galloped off into the woods. With any luck, the snow would cover her tracks before the Krampus returned. Over an hour later, Lyra had managed to find an exit to the woods and instead found herself trekking over white, rolling hills. She panted, her breath forming steam clouds as she trudged up another hill, hoping that she’d finally spot a village or somewhere safe. She pressed her watch communicator for what felt like the hundredth time. “HQ come in… this is… this is Agent Heartstrings… please respond…” More static. “HQ, come in… I repeat, this is… hah… this is Agent Heartstrings…” She came up over the hill. On the other side was simply an endless field with nothing but bare trees caked in snow. No cities were on the horizon. There were no villages. Not even a simple farm could be seen. She was all alone, surrounded by endless white, her mint green coat the only spot of color in the vast, frozen wilderness. “HQ… come… in…” she gasped. She took another step forward, but her legs gave out and she collapsed into the snow. She was so cold, and the snow began to collect on her coat as if forming a blanket. Her eyes felt heavy. She was so tired… she just wanted to sleep… “This is it,” she whispered, her eyes slowly shutting. “Bon Bon… I’m sorry… I wish I could make it up to you…” She curled herself up into a ball, trying to hold onto what little warmth she had left. “If I could have one gift for Hearth’s Warming… I’d just want to spend a quiet day with you… just like you wanted.” She shut her eyes. The world went silent. And yet, for some reason, she thought she heard a jingle bell. “Well, now,” said a deep, sonorous voice as a hoof crunched into the snow next to her, “that certainly is a sincere wish. And I happen to hear such wishes the loudest, even if they’re whispered.” “Who…?” Lyra asked weakly. She felt herself being lifted from the snow and onto the speaker’s back. “Now, now, Lyra, let’s get you warmed up and then we can see about granting your wish…” She looked up, and though her vision was blurry, she saw a red cap and long, branching antlers… “Bah!” the Krampus grumbled as he paced the cavern floor. “How did that little unicorn escape?! My cages are perfect! Nopony can escape them!” “Really?” Bon Bon asked, smirking. “Because it seems somepony did.” The Krampus roared and stomped over to her cage. “You! This is your doing! Tell me how she did it!” Bon Bon smirked. “You keep your silence? Very well, then,” he said, unlocking her cage and yanking her out roughly, “if your lovey dove has left you here, then you will take her punishment for her!” He raised the bundle of sticks high over his head. “Put. Her. Down. Now.” The Krampus froze and slowly turned. The whole cavern gasped in awe. A towering reindeer dressed in red with a flowing white beard and jingle bells around his neck stood at the entrance to the cave. Lyra peeked out from behind his long legs and waved at Bon Bon. “So… you finally come to see old Krampus, eh, Kringle?” Krampus sniffed. The reindeer nodded gently. “It’s been a long, long time, my friend,” he said. “Wait,” Bon Bon gasped. “That can’t possibly be… are you really…?” “Santa Hooves?” the reindeer asked, raising an eyebrow. “Oh, surely that must be a fairy tale, don’t you think? Ho ho ho…” The cavern erupted in cheers. “Silence!” the Krampus roared. “All of you, be silent!” “Krampus,” Santa said gently, stepping towards him. “I understand how you feel, but you surely know this is wrong.” “Bah!” the Krampus snorted, waving a hand dismissively. “You coddle all the little foals with your toys and your goodies. What is worst thing you ever do to bad ones? Coal in stocking? You never wanted to get your hooves dirty! You left me to do dirty work and everypony loves you, but they hate me. I would not mind, but when I try to do job even better, you toss me out like old fruitcake! “Well, no more! I, the Krampus, will punish these naughty ones and absolve them of all their sins!” Santa Hooves took a deep breath and went right up to him. “Well, then, my old friend, I have only one thing to say to you…” And then, to everypony’s surprise, he bowed his head, even bending a knee. “I’m sorry, Krampus.” The Krampus gawked at him. “You… are?” “Yes, I am,” he said. “Perhaps it was pride that kept me from seeking you out, or perhaps it was the vain wish that you’d simply moved on, but seeing what you’ve done makes me understand how deeply upset you must have been. But there’s no need to punish these ponies, no matter what they’ve done.” “Oh?” the Krampus asked. “Then what can cleanse them of their misdeeds?” Santa chuckled. “Ah, Krampus… you and I are of a different time. Reward the good and punish the bad: that was our philosophy. But not every good deed goes unrewarded, and not every bad deed need be punished. But if a bad deed is truly to be expunged, then you need only watch these two mares to find out how…” He looked down at Lyra. She stepped forward, locking eyes with Bon Bon. “Bon Bon… I’m sorry for not telling you about Cloud Chaser,” she said, placing her hoof on her heart. “And for eating your cookie dough batter without asking. Annnnd for not being more sensitive about what you wanted to do for Hearth’s Warming. Do you forgive me?” Bon Bon’s eyes began to water. “Lyra… of course! You’re my very best friend and the pony I love best in the world. Why would I ever hold it against you? Just… do you forgive me for, well… all the secrets I’ve kept too?” “Of course I do!” Lyra exclaimed. “Bah!” the Krampus scoffed. “This again? The deed remains! Nothing can… can…” He paused. His red eyes glowed, but he saw that the dark aura of sin he saw around them was rapidly dissipating. “No… no, it is not possible…” “Ponies of Equestria!” Santa called out. “Do you likewise renounce your grudges against each other? Do you choose to forgive, rather than punish?” A chorus of emphatic agreement spread throughout the cavern. Pony turned to pony, offering apology and forgiveness for every misdeed that came to mind. “No… no no no no no!” the Krampus shouted, dropping Bon Bon as he whirled around in a rage. “Without punishment, there is no absolution! Without fear, the sinner will sin! The naughty pony of today will become the villain of tomorrow! I must… I must…” Santa put his hoof on the Krampus’s shoulder. “Krampus,” he said, “I should have listened to you and tried harder to understand your concerns. Rather than casting you out, I should have found a way for you to keep working by my side. Perhaps, every once in a while, a good scare is exactly what a child needs to keep them on the straight path. So, my friend, will you forgive me of my misdeeds and let me make amends?” The Krampus stared at him for a moment, blinking numbly. “I… I…” Then he took on a fierce grin and dashed behind Santa, swiftly whacking his backside with the bundle of sticks, causing the reindeer to yelp in pain. “Hahahaha!” the Krampus laughed. “Ahhh, apologies, Kringle, but I would not be myself if I did not do that at least once… “But very well,” he said, holding out his bony, hoof-like hand, “I will forgive you, provided you do the same for me. Perhaps next year will be a better Hearth’s Warming for us both.” Santa laughed in spite of his embarrassment and sore bottom and hoof-bumped the Krampus. “Lyra, you did it!” Bon Bon cried, running to her and tackling her in a big hug. “Me? Nah, it was a team effort,” she chuckled, looking up at her. Then she got a sly grin. “Hey, as long as we’re like this…” Bon Bon grinned back and leaned in, her lips covered. Santa elbowed the Krampus. “Krampus, if you wouldn’t mind?” The Krampus roared at them both, raising the bundle of sticks threateningly. “No naughtiness!” he shouted. The two mares separated and nodded instantly. “Good,” Santa Hooves said. His antlers glowed and he cast a beam of magic at the watch communicator Lyra wore around her foreleg. “Now, while the Krampus frees the rest of your friends, I suggest you call your agency. And tell them to bring lots of memory-erasing mirrors… I’m afraid this incident is a bit too public for my taste.” Lyra nodded. “Um, HQ, this is Agent Heartstrings reporting in…” “Heartstrings?” Furlong asked. “What’s going on, what’s your status?!” Lyra and Bon Bon exchanged a look. “Uhhh, this might take a while…” Bon Bon’s eyes gently fluttered open as she awoke in her bed the next morning. The soft light of dawn was just beginning to trickle in through the window. A mint green foreleg draped over her and she felt Lyra’s muzzle press into her neck, her warm breath tickling her slightly. “Looks like Santa got me my Hearth’s Warming wish,” Lyra chuckled. She leaned in close and planted several kisses on Bon Bon’s cheek. “Mmm,” Bon Bon murmured, turning to face her and hold her close. “We should really get up.” “Hm… nah,” Lyra said. “No? Not for breakfast?” “I’m not that hungry,” she said, her traitorous stomach gurgling. “Oh? Not to open presents?” “They’re not going anywhere.” “Not even to find out what crazy cover story SMILE cooked up to explain everything that happened?” “Ehh, we’ll find out soon enough.” “Hmmm, well, in that case…” She leaned in for a kiss. “Oh!” Lyra said, sitting up suddenly. “Wait! I do know of something worth getting up for!” “Ugh,” Bon Bon groaned. “It better be…” Lyra ran out of the room and down the stairs. There was some commotion in other parts of the house, but soon she returned carrying their Hearth’s Warming dolls in her magic. “Lyra, I’ve seen those,” Bon Bon said. “Ah, but I just remembered where I kept this!” Lyra exclaimed, holding up a second box. “I ordered this from Rarity and I meant to show it to you yesterday, but now that I remember where I put it, it’s time to show you!” “Show me what?” Bon Bon asked impatiently as she sat up, rubbing her eyes. Lyra had turned her back for a moment, but when she turned back around, Bon Bon saw what she’d done. The two dolls bearing their likenesses were now each wearing a miniature white wedding dress. Bon Bon’s eyes lit up. “O…” “M…” Lyra added. “Goodness!” they both finished together, laughing. “Okay, okay, let’s go put them on the mantle,” Bon Bon said, getting up and trotting to the stairs. “And then? Should we do something nice for Hearth’s Warming?” Bon Bon smirked. “That… and then maybe something naughty.” Lyra followed her, giggling like a schoolfilly. For that Hearth’s Warming and many to come, she knew, there would be ups and downs, good deeds and misdeeds, and time after time they’d make mistakes and have to forgive each other all over again. And knowing that each would be there for one another through it all was truly the greatest Hearth’s Warming gift they could have asked for. HAPPY HEARTH’S WARMING TO ALL, AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT! or Merry Christmas, from The Hat Man! Author's Note Happy holidays to you all! I hope you enjoyed this, my fifth annual holiday story! You can read my other ones at this bookshelf here! Also, as a gift to my editors, this story has not been edited by anyone but me, so please forgive some rough spots. Thanks for reading! By the way, here's the full cover image done by my longtime friend and collaborator, Greenfinger!
