Author's Note
This is a literary laxative. I've suffered from psychic constipation lately so I decided to do something just for fun. It started small but it grew as I went along.
I've been reading more than writing and I found a concept that amused me in Royal Duties but I wanted a different execution so I grabbed the idea and ran with it. If you like what you see here, thank TwistedSpectrum and if you don't, blame me. You should read his story anyway, it's funny.
How I Became a Princess
There are just a very few Ponies that know my real story. All but one of them are Princesses and that one has more reason than anypony to keep the secret. But I want a record, now, before too many memories fade. Some day my foals may want to understand their ancestry. So I’m writing this journal and keeping it well protected.
It began on another world mostly unknown to Ponies.
I’m just kinda ignoring the old Twilight Zone reruns while waiting for the late news to come on. I really want to know what the weather is going to be for the next few days so I can make some plans. Living on a farm makes weather a major factor in life.
The damned TV is acting up. Being out in the boonies means that if there's a thunderstorm anywhere in hundred kilometers, the TV gets weird. But I can usually find a channel that works and this isn’t like that. The whole screen is blank except for a half meter square in the center. I’m getting pissed. I just plunked down major cash for an extra giant, super definition, ultra bright, does everything but make the popcorn, wonder TV and if I have to wrestle this monster back out the door after only a few weeks, someone is going to feel my wrath.
The square is becoming well defined and pale blue in color. It looks weird, like water but sideways. Well, there’s a universal solution for all problems electronic, cold boot, so I turn the TV off. That does not make it better. The power light goes red and the background dims but the damned little blue square gets sharper. There’s some kind of image in it that looks like fog clearing in a room. Sonofabitch, there’s a Pony in it. I take a seat on the coffee table so I can get a closer look at whatever this is.
I’m a beat up old farmer but I had a Brony phase years ago so I recognize Cadance when the image resolves. Horn? Check. Wings? Check. Lots of pink? Check. It’s confirmed. Her purple eyes are staring directly at me as she says . . . something? It sounds like a language but at the same time it’s obviously equine. She’s wearing some kind of pendant and dangling a matching pendant in front of her. She speaks more of that . . language? . . into the pendant then holds it to her ear. I get that she’s trying to say that it’s a translator but what good is that going to do on the other side of the TV screen. Then she tosses it at me.
It bounces off my knee and I immediately fall into a world class ‘whatinthefuck!’.
Recovering, I reach out and pick it up. It’s real. Cadance is motioning for me to put it on. After thinking for a few seconds, I drop it over my head. I mean things can’t get much stranger than this so why not?
Cadance says, “Good boy. At least you can understand my words now.”
I just nod and stare. It’s a real, live, magic Pony in my living room. I know what LSD feels like and this ain’t it. So I’ve either died and gone to a really unique Heaven or this is what it seems to be. Whichever it is, there’s nothing to do but go along and see what develops.
Cadance is speaking again, “ . . I said, how would you like to spend a week in the Crystal Empire? You’d be treated like royalty and get to experience life as a Pony.”
Now that sounds interesting, “What do I have to do? And will I be able to come back here?”
Cadance smiles, “All you have to do is want it. Your will and that amulet are all that are necessary and you can return the same way.”
I look at the amulet in my hand and back up to Cadance, “Hell yes. I’d love to visit Equestria for a week. Let me get some clothes togeth . . .”
That’s when I realize that I can’t move.
Cadance is smirking, “Don’t worry, everything will be provided. You may black out for a minute because jumping universes is a big hurdle for a small mind.”
Now it is beginning to feel like LSD. I’m feeling things that just aren’t possible and remembering Ponies that were never in the show. It’s like someone dumped my brain into a blender and added a Pony brain before hitting the ‘high’ switch. My last thought is how much I wish she hadn’t said it just that way.
I’m laying on the carpet except it’s much softer and nicer than the stain proof stuff in my living room. I raise my head and damned, everything is so bright and detailed. It’s like super vision. I focus on the blue square in front of me. In it I see me sitting on my couch holding the amulet. This is interesting.
‘I’ say, “You’ll be tired for a while. It took a lot to open the first portal, returning will be easier. Hang the amulet on the mirror until next week, you’ll need it then. You’ll get written instructions by then and I imagine you’ll be ready to go home. My heat will be fading and I’ll have a while before I have to find another sucker.”
‘I’ take the amulet off and lay it on the coffee table. The blue square quickly shrinks to a dot and disappears leaving a common vanity mirror in its place. There’s not much else to do so I look around and take stock of my situation. I’m in a windowless room with a carpeted floor and wood walls with hangings of some sort. There’s a large wardrobe against one wall and a common makeup table in front of me with that mirror on it.
Turning my head around (all the way around!), I look down a long back covered in pink fur and feathers followed by two substantial hips with a tail colored in streaks from gold to violet. Yep, no matter who I am, the body is Cadance. Now, can I stand?
I get my butt up in the air without too much trouble but I’m weak. My arms (Front Legs!) feel rubbery. She’s right, I feel like I’ve run a marathon and a half. After some grunting and groaning I make it up and go to take a step. As I fall sideways my wings snap out and hold me up (Wings!!). Interesting, at least part of me is working right. Getting all four (Four!) feet under me properly, I feel an absence. Looking under myself, I see two perfect pink teats with dainty nipples hanging down. I knew that’s what I would see but actually confirming that my balls were left behind in another universe is disturbing.
“Cady, are you all right?” comes from the other side of the door.
I answer, “I’m okay. I had a little accident but nothing serious.” Definitely not my voice, it’s very feminine and sultry.
As the door opens I fold my wings and try to look like I know what I’m doing. It’s Shining Armor in all his glorious flesh. My tail starts twitching so I clamp down on it.
He steps through the door and looks at me with concern, “What happened?”
I let my head droop a little, “I had a little magical misadventure. I’m not hurt, just really tired and weak.”
I take a step toward him and stagger a little. Instantly, he’s by my side propping me up.
Tenderly, “You are weak. Let me take you to the bed.”
I feel myself lifted by a soft rose colored cloud and deposited on Shining Armor’s back. He carefully walks out the door and down the hall. Oh shit! I can feel his muscles working under me and a warm sensation under my tail. I clamp down hard on it. I know Cadance said she was in heat and expected me to go through it for her but it just isn’t that simple. I’m certain she chose a male stand in to be sure I’d be repulsed enough to abandon this body and rush home as soon as I could but Cadance and I aren’t the only ones involved. Shining Armor is owed some kind of explanation.
The bedroom is larger than my house and in the center of it is a round bed big enough for a whole herd of Ponies. Shining carefully floats me to the middle of the bed and lays me on my side. I close my eyes and snuggle into the rich softness. The bed moves as Shining climbs in behind me and I feel him pulling my back against his chest. This body knows Shining and feels safe in his embrace. I feel his breath on my ear.
He whispers, “I love you, Cady,” in my ear and kisses my neck.
Somehow I know with complete certainty that he does so I answer, “I know Shiny,” and it just seems so natural. We are going to have a serious conversation in the morning but right now I slip off to sleep feeling happy beyond all reason.
This has got to be an all time great dream. Something just feels incredibly good about my body and it’s getting better. Pleasure is radiating from my backside through the center of my being. I hear moaning and realize that it’s me. My body is pushing something out toward the source of this pleasure. My lips part as the muscles contract and push it out.
Wait a minute. I have lips on my backside?
“AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!”
Contact! Lightning has struck that part thrusting out of me and it’s traveled all the way through my body to come out of my mouth. My eyes snap open and I’m looking up at the ceiling from flat on my back in that big round bed with my tail hanging over the edge. I can wiggle a little but my wings are spread wide and flat beneath me and not giving a bit. So I raise my head and look down my chest to find Shining’s head just past my teats with his face buried in my pussy.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!”
My back arches as lightning strikes again. The part thrusting out is my clit and the lightning is Shiny’s lips when he sucks on it. Wow! I really should tell Shiny I’m not Cadance but right now I’m panting too hard to speak. As I struggle to get my mouth to function, my other lips take over and pull wide open. Shiny immediately shoves his tongue about halfway to my lungs.
“Oooooooohhh,” that feels good. MORE!! Something liquid is running around my asshole and down my tail.
Shiny pulls out then I feel his weight on the bed with me. Opening my eyes, I see his head over my chest with his front legs stretched out to just in front of my wings. Raising my head and looking between our bodies, I see his fully erect cock coming directly at me. My back arches reflexively to bring my pussy into exact alignment with his rapidly approaching cock. I open my mouth to say something. . .
“NNNNNAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!” It’s way too late.
I can feel every vein and every wrinkle on his cock as it slides into my pussy. His breath is hot on my neck as he steps forward sinking more of his huge cock into me. My senses magnify, feeling every hair on his flanks as I wrap my hind legs around him and pull myself against him, forcing his cock even deeper into me. My pussy is swallowing his cock, rippling muscles are pulling him into me, denying him any chance to withdraw. His clenched teeth are against my throat as he blows like a runner hitting his stride.
With my forelegs, I pull him against me, maximizing contact with him. His cock has reached the end of my pussy and it’s getting bigger. He’s flaring! His iron stiff cock begins to surge through short thrusts. OH SHIT! Waves of cum are flowing up his shaft and deep into my body. My wings shoot up and wrap around him locking us together. Rose and blue lights are flashing brightly.
“SSSHHHIIINNNYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” and I’m out of there.
It can’t be more than a few seconds later when I come to. Shiny’s heart is pounding so hard I can feel it against my chest. His cock is still inside me, slowly shrinking, but my pussy is not letting it go easily. Then I become aware that I can feel his love for me. It’s pouring into my soul in torrents washing away all doubts and worries. What is wrong with that idiot bitch that she would want to miss this?
Shiny’s cock drops out of me and he shifts a little higher over my body as I relax my wings. Looking directly into my eyes, he softly kisses me on the lips.
“Thank you, Cady, thank you so very much. I’ve waited years for that and it was worth every single second.”
Raising my head, I kiss him back, “No, thank you, Shiny. Until just now I didn’t even know what I was waiting for.”
Shit! As if life isn’t complicated enough. I’m beginning to accept this body, hooves, pussy, and all. And I like Shiny too. That big conversation is getting bigger by the minute. What I can’t do is stay here. In a few more minutes I’m going to be ready to flip him over and rape him.
Thinking fast, “Hey, Shiny. As much as I want to spend the day right here, if I don’t get to a toilet pretty soon the bed is going to be a major mess.”
“No problem,” as he slides down my body and off onto the floor. I rock from side to side to allow my wings to fold then slide off to the floor myself. Lurching a little, I head for the half open door in the corner.
Teasing, I say, “See what you’ve done to me? I can hardly walk.”
It’s actually not too bad as long as I concentrate on where I want to go and ignore the details. The body knows and will handle the small stuff. Through that door is a bathroom nearly as big as the bedroom. There’s a pair of strange looking bowls on the floor near one wall, a walk in shower for four and a bathtub for a crowd. Several sinks and vanities are scattered along the walls. So this is how royalty lives? It’s damned nice.
A cold shower is what I need most so I head straight there pulling the curtain closed behind me. The valves are simple enough and the red=hot blue=cold code holds true. Letting the cold water flow over me, I raise my tail over my back and start rinsing my backside. Suddenly, I feel a strong urge to hunch up and my pussy does the reverse of the earlier swallowing motions. A remarkably small puddle of white and some yellowish gel are expelled. I strain and a flow of clear liquid finishes the job. Straightening up, I feel thoroughly satisfied. I still have to figure out how to piss and shit but I have a little more time now.
As if on cue, I hear water splashing on the other side of the curtain. Peaking around the end, I behold Shining stretched out over one of the bowls with his dick hanging limply as a large stream of piss cascades into the bowl. Dammit. That boy puts the ‘hung’ in ‘hung like a horse’. He shakes once and steps away from the bowl as he reels himself back in. The large pool of foamy yellow simply vanishes before he takes three steps. Of course! Magic Ponies have magic toilets. Duh!
Shining backs up to the same bowl, raises his tail, and drops a stallion worthy pile. He spots me while he’s doing it and grins, “I hope there’s room for me in there.”
Smiling, “Yes, but step carefully.”
I take another rinse because that’s about all I can do at this point and step to the other end of the enclosure so I can shake off.
“WWWAAAA. Why didn’t you tell me it was cold water??” Shining screams.
“I warned you to be careful. I’m in heat, Shiny. If I don’t do something to cool it off, we won’t leave the bedroom this week.”
Laughing loudly, “Oh Cady, I don’t know what you did to yourself last night but I like it.”
Shit! I’ve got to slow this down a little, “Not to be a wet blanket, but we need to have a long serious talk before this goes any further. There are things you need to know and decisions to be made.”
I leave him in the shower and go use the magic toilet myself.
“Okay, Darling. We need breakfast and I have to check in with the office. I gave them a heat notice but being in command means I still have to keep them from screwing up too bad. It’ll only take an hour or so.”
“That’s alright. I have some sorting to do before I’m ready to explain it all.”
First, I have to figure out what to do about all this hair. My mane and tail are wet and I don’t have the first clue how to dry them. Think dummy! I’m a Princess so my mane should flow, right? Concentrate. Nothing. All I want is for my hair to fluff up and dry out. And it does.
That was educational. Magic can’t be forced but it will easily follow a clear formulation.
Shortly after I walk out to the bedroom, Shining follows.
“Is my Princess ready for breakfast?” he asks.
“Lead on, my Lusty Prince,” I return.
Opening another door on the other side of the bedroom, he smiles, “Enjoying the view back there?”
I laugh, “Yes,” and I really am. Shiny not only has some very well defined muscles rippling under his shiny coat, he also has a pair of very substantial balls jiggling in plain sight. I don’t know if I’m mad or glad but I find him sexy as all get out. There’s a nice little kitchen behind that door with a table for six to one side. Shiny heads for the counter while I get comfortable at the table.
“What do you want, Cady? Your usual?”
“What are you having?” I ask.
“I’m just going to grab some fruit and run. The faster I get the office behind me, the longer we can be together.”
Danger! Minefield ahead! “I’ll have the same for the same reason. Shiny, I know you can tell that some things have changed since last night. I want you to know that the changes are not necessarily permanent. There is a price to be paid and part of it is a loss of much of my memory. I knew that was possible and I wrote a manuscript to help me with that. I’m just not sure where I put it. That’s what I’m going to be doing while you’re gone, looking for that manuscript.”
Shiny sets a plate of assorted fruit in front of me and rests one fore hoof lightly on mine, “Are the instructions to reverse this change in that manuscript?”
I nod, “Yes.”
With great intensity, “Then if I find it first, I’ll burn it.”
Pleading, “No, Shiny. This is a decision that we have to make together after all the facts are in. That’s why we’re talking. I can’t make it for you and you can’t make it for me.”
His ears go down briefly then he focuses on me, “Unless it will set off some kind of world destroying cataclysm, you have my vote. This morning was the first time since our honeymoon that I’ve felt your full love. Whatever that damned bug did to you has been getting progressively worse since then. I will pay any price that falls on me individually to keep you as you are right now.”
Well, there’s a big clue to what went wrong but how can anypony be so irrational as to give up what she has with Shining? The guy is eager to die for her happiness. All she ever had to do was ask and he would give her whatever she wanted.
Shiny pauses his breakfast, “I saw your diary on the table in the bedroom. That would be a good place to start looking.”
Shiny finishes gobbling his plate down while I savor mine. All of this fruit is sweet and delicious. After years as a diabetic it’s almost sinful to be able to enjoy sweets again. Shining is gone when I finish mine so I head for the bedroom in search of a diary. Two maids are already there changing the bed. The youngest looks up to see me and recoils with an expression of terror.
The senior maid pleads, “Forgive us, Your Majesty. We thought you had gone to Your Court.”
Softly I say, “Don’t worry about it. I will not be holding Court for a few days. All I want right now is something off the table and I will be out of your way.”
Both of them stand there frozen in place as I go to the table, pick up the diary in my mouth, and return to the kitchen. With the diary on the kitchen table I study it carefully. It has a clasp holding it closed but there is no button or keyhole. Yep, magic Ponies have magic locks. I touch my horn to the clasp and think about how much I want it open. ‘pop’ It opens.
Turning the pages with the tip of my horn is awkward but doable. It’s some troubling reading. She rants for two pages of small script about how Shining is such an annoying pest, always clinging to her and getting in her way. Then she goes off on some member of the staff that just can’t understand simple instructions or perform any task to suit her. If this diary is to be believed there is a worldwide conspiracy to frustrate her headed by Celestia herself and implemented by Shining Armor.
One recurring theme is Shining’s desire for a foal. Cadance very clearly does not want one and it’s one of the few decisions of hers that I agree with. No way does this psycho belong around foals. Then I get to the final entry. . .
Yes! I have a solution. All of the necessary spells are ready and the artifacts are in place. All I have to do is choose a non-magic user and my body will be safe. A male should guarantee that Shiny won’t get his foal and even if he does, I can take care of it when I get back. I bet a male human will be screaming to get out of my body after experiencing heat as a mare. Who knows, maybe Shiny will give him a unique experience. I bet that would be fun to watch!
The Amulet requires willing participation so I’ll have to be careful what I tell him. If he gets suspicious I’ll just jerk the Amulet back and try another human. But I doubt any of them have the brains to understand what’s happening before it’s too late. Once the transfer is done my body will be exhausted from the effort of opening the portal so he won’t be a threat.
He won’t get the instructions to open the portal for a return until my heat has had enough time to run its course so he can’t try to come back early. I’m going to have fun without all the silly official business sucking up my time. All I have to do is lay around and explore the tastes and sensations of the human world. This is going to be a vacation.
I could even get extra lucky. Shiny is going to have the full effects of my heat scent on him and I am his wife. He could get into a fight with the human and go to jail or worse. All I need is grounds for divorce and this could do it. The more I think about it, the more I like this plan.
Damned! No wonder Shiny doesn’t want her back. But I have to wonder how the Princess of Love could have fallen so low. The questions just keep getting worse. The world would definitely be a better place without a psycho goddess but she’s sick and would it be right for me to not make an attempt to help her? Hell, do I want to spend the rest of my life as a mare including bearing and raising foals? That’s a big leap for a guy that was happy with his balls this time yesterday.
Shiny comes in the door so I close and lock the diary. He has enough problems without seeing her willingness to kill his foal. He seems excited about something.
“Get dressed. We have been summoned to Canterlot. Celestia wants to see both of us as soon as we can get there.”
Wanna bet she felt that inter dimensional portal all the way in Canterlot?
“Shiny, I don’t remember how. I’m not really a Princess anyway until I recover enough of my magic to do something useful with it. Can I just go how I am?”
Shiny is stunned but he recovers nicely, “Darling, you’re a Princess. You’re supposed to do whatever you feel is right and nopony can question you.”
“Thank you, Shiny. I need you to do two things for me. First, carry that diary. Celestia needs to see it. Second, arrange us some transportation with privacy. We need to talk about a lot of things before we get to Canterlot and they must remain absolutely between the two of us.”
Shiny picks up the diary with his magic and turns to face me, “I’ve already ordered the Royal Chariot and I can throw a privacy shield around us. Let’s go,” as he starts for the door.
We go down the hall then down a bunch of stairs to exit a big door onto a plaza. It’s the most amazing place I have ever seen. Everything is made of crystal and glows with soft pastel colors. But we’re in a hurry and quickly board a highly ornate chariot pulled by a pair of stout Pegasi. As soon as the door is closed we are airborne and headed south. Shiny quickly puts up a shield that blocks all sound and vision from the interior of the chariot. It’s time to talk.
Shiny gets the first word, “Can I read that diary?”
I’m emphatic, “NO! In fact, I’m going to ask Celestia to burn it after she’s read it. Trust me, Shiny, there’s nothing in that diary but pain and worse pain for some good Ponies.”
I’ve confused Shiny, “But that’s your diary. How could there be anything in it that’s not in you?”
Deep breath. Exhale. Deep breath, “Shiny, that’s not my diary because I’m not Cadance,” and I lay the whole story out for him from descent into madness through tricking me into swapping bodies all the way to boarding the chariot. I did leave out a few details like her hopes that I would fight or kill him and her disdain for his foal.
Poor Shiny has a major ‘deer in the headlights’ look, “No. Just. No. I felt your love this morning. That can’t be faked.”
I’m sheepish, “It isn’t fake, Shiny, but it is one of the things that we have to decide together. Before last night I was an old man, a guy just like you. You surprised me this morning but I found out that I liked it. I’ve never been interested in dick or horses at any time in my life but this morning I discovered that I not only love you but I crave your body and your foals. I want to know if this is some magic that might wear off or is it real. That could be really important if we decide I should stay and I need to know if you could accept me on those terms.”
Shiny says, “The first is a question for Celestia and Twilight. They would be the ones to unravel any magic issues. As far as my feelings, I’ve already answered that. No matter where or what you came from, I can feel your soul and it is a kind and loving soul that I would be proud to share my life with.”
I can feel the tears beginning, “Thank you, Shiny. I hope that it was the sharing of our souls this morning that has altered my worldview. That would mean that we could re-enforce it often and I could be confident that our foals would be safe and happy.”
Shiny grabs me in a hug and starts sobbing lightly on my shoulder so I wrap my wings around him and cry on his shoulder for a while.
After a little while, I whisper in Shiny’s ear, “Shiny Honey, I think we know how we feel now but there are some other issues we need to address before we’re in front of Celestia. Are you ready for that?”
Shiny nods so I unwrap my wings and sit back on the seat. Shiny produces a handkerchief from somewhere and wipes both our faces then sits next to me.
I’m going to hate myself for this, “Darling, the reason that diary must be burned is because the mare that wrote is a very sick individual. I mean a danger to all around her kind of sick. What I want to know is the state of the art of mental health services in Equestria.”
“I don’t understand,” from a very confused Shiny.
“Do doctors in Equestria know how to fix a broken mind? Can they repair a damaged soul?”
Shiny is crying again, “That damned bug tortured her. Everything was great right after the wedding and the defeat of the Changelings. Then she started slowly pulling away from everypony. We tried to get her help but it just isn’t possible to force a Princess to do anything that she doesn’t want to do. They told me to give her a calm, safe environment and maybe someday she would come around.”
Dammit. “Shining, I’m deeply sorry. She was getting worse every day. Your love was holding her in check but she was looking for a way out. I’m it.”
I pull Shiny against me and let him cry on my shoulder until we land at Canterlot Castle. We get out and dismiss the Pegasi. The guards at the Castle door look at me strangely but don’t question anything Shining says. Celestia is holding Court. When we step into Throne Room Celestia’s eyes fasten on me and narrow. She says something to Luna and Luna comes around the Throne Room to where we are waiting.
Luna glares at me and says, “Come with me.”
We follow her through a side door and down a hall to a conference room with a large table and bean bag chairs. There we wait.
I ask, “Shiny, could you please set the diary on the table in front of me?”
He does and we wait some more. Then the door bursts open and Celestia storms in with Twilight in tow. Glaring at me, “What have you done with Cadance?”
Glaring back, I ask, “Do you have truth spells focused on me? If not, do it. All of you.”
That gets me a collection of indeterminate expressions and some flickering horns. Celestia nods.
Enunciating with great care, “Absolutely nothing. She did this to me. Watch.”
I touch my horn to the diary and will it to open. When it does, I offer it to Celestia, “Read some of it. It won’t take much to get the idea. Then read the final entry. Shiny wants to read it and I’m sure Twilight will want to also. I most strongly do not want them to. I want you to burn it when you have what you need but I have decided to respect your decision if you want to allow them to see it.”
Celestia pages rapidly through the diary then she stops and concentrates on one page. She studies it carefully for several minutes then she floats the book into the middle of the room where it bursts into ashes and the ashes vanish.
Celestia is looking at me with interest now, “Please, tell us your story.”
So I gave it to her from the TV acting up to getting off the chariot in Canterlot.
Celestia turns her attention to to Shining, “Shining Armor, how do you feel about this?”
Shiny leans against me and speaks proudly, “This is my wife, the mare that I want to spend my life with raising our foals.”
Celestia focuses back on me, “Cadance, you should know that if the mare that did these things were ever found in Equestria, she would be stripped of all of her rights and titles and banished to a non-magical dimension. We feel strongly about privileged magic users that abuse the privilege. Now, what can we do for you?”
Here I go, “I haven’t accepted the name yet. Before I can, I need two things from all of you. First, I need to understand the change in myself. Yesterday I was a normal male human and Shining Armor was a fairytale. This morning I am a mare with a love for a very real Shiny and an intense desire for his body and foals. We had Richter level sex and I absolutely loved it. I need to understand this change in my worldview. I need to know how permanent it is and how it will affect our future because I can’t bring a foal into uncertainty.”
Twilight spoke up for the first time, “What’s a ‘richter’?”
Smiling, I answer, “That’s a human thing. It’s a scale used to measure earthquakes.”
Luna is snickering and Twilight is doing her impression of a stoplight.
Celestia walks over to us, “Shining, please give us a little room. Cadance, get comfortable in a position where you won’t fall and don’t mind some small irritations. This will take a couple of minutes.”
A golden glow surrounds me and feel some minor tickles. After a little bit Celestia steps back and asks, “Twilight, can you confirm my findings?”
So we repeat the whole thing with a light purple glow.
They look at each other then Twilight speaks, “You did it to yourself and it is exactly as permanent as you want it to be.”
Celestia picks it up, “I know you have figured out that magic works via a well defined goal directed by your will. You are an Alicorn with very strong magic and you are a mare in heat. So when your heat gave you Shining Armor as the goal, your magic altered you to achieve it. It’s a completely obvious outcome of mixing raw magic with raw lust. We need to get you trained in magic fast or you may have some other unintended consequences.”
“That is the second thing I need from you, training. I need to learn how to be a Pony, and a mare, and a Princess, and a ruler. It’s going to take a lot of work to pull this off. Will you help me?”
Twilight steps forward again, “Here’s your first lesson in how to be a Pony. Once we knew what happened, there is no chance that we wouldn’t help you. You’re a Pony and you need us, Cadance.”
I’m crying, “Thank you, thank all of you. I accept the name and will do everything that I can to live up to it.”
We have a giant hugfest then I ask Celestia, “Do you have a room we can use for the night, a fairly isolated room?”
Twilight pipes up, “You can stay with me in my tower.”
I smile, “You don’t want us there tonight, Twilight. It’s going to get Richter level loud and bright.”
Celestia laughs and turns to Shiny, “Use Ambassadors four and remember to put up a sound barrier. Luna can warn the Night Guard to expect fireworks. I’ll expect both of you for breakfast and an extended conference in the morning.”
I ask Shiny, “Can you get word to our team that they have the night off and we won’t leave before lunch tomorrow?”
Celestia is grinning from ear to ear, “Cadance, you’re already more than halfway to a good ruler, you care about your Ponies. I wish I could say the same about any of the Nobles following my Court.”
We spend the rest of the afternoon with Twilight in her library. She picks out some books for me to take home and study then we work on the basics. I seem to have some analog to muscle memory for magic so I am able to master basic manipulation and she teaches me to hold things with my hooves Earth Pony style. Shiny plays cards with Spike and the two of them make dinner. Dinner is wonderful and I am able to eat in a civilized fashion with great company.
After dinner we settle into the main room on cushions. Shiny and I push ours together and I wrap my wing around him as he leans against me. He nuzzles my neck and I snuffle his ears as Twilight explains Pony society to me. I’m having trouble keeping my tail quiet and Shiny seems fidgety. Then I realize that Twilight is speaking directly to me.
“ . . don’t you two just turn in. We’ll have a mare class tomorrow and I’ll explain why anything else I say tonight is wasted.”
I have to agree so we say ‘thank you’ and Shiny leads me to our suite. This is completely new territory to me, seducing a stallion, but I’m eager to explore it. As soon as the door closes I’m helping him get his uniform off.
Shiny is laughing, “Slow down, Cady. I have to get the sound blocker up before I get too distracted to cast it.”
I back up and watch as his horn glows lightly. The walls and door take on a faint sheen that I’m not sure I really see. He drops the last of his uniform and walks to me. I sit my butt on the floor to equalize our heights we start kissing. Oh my! Between horse sized tongues and prehensile lips, kissing alone is better than human sex. I have to sit on the side of my hips so my tail can go straight up and wave while my clit winks . Shiny’s dick is shooting out of his sheath.
Think, Cady, what did you like when you had a dick? So I start nibbling on his throat and down his neck. His dick is firming up nicely. Kneeling in front, I continue down across his chest and nibble on the inside of his front legs. I can feel more than hear a rumbling in Shiny’s chest. Pushing my head under his chest, I hook my chin behind his leg and pull him over me. As I rub my head under his chest, his dick snaps to steel hardness and dribbles precum.
Dammit, horned sex is complicated. It takes keeping my head at just the right angle to not stab Shiny with my horn. I set up a rhythm of down and push, up and pull. Each repetition brings his dick a little closer to my mouth. It’s close enough that my outstretched tongue can swirl around the pocket in the head of his dick. Shiny grunts and his hips thrust forward. Now my lips can wrap around his dick. I ripple my lips and . . .
“OOOHHH. OOOHHH. OOOHHH.”
Shiny thrusts himself into my mouth down to his medial ridge. Keeping my teeth wide, I twist my lips around his medial ridge while my tongue rubs up and down against the bottom of his dick.
“DAMMIIITTTT CADYYYY”
His dick flares, pushing out my cheeks behind my teeth and his urethra swells as his load pumps into my throat. I swallow as fast as I can while a dozen squirts fill me. Rose colored flash bulbs are going off all over the room.
“SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT SHIT”
My head rocks back and forth as he thrusts to try to push his load as deep into me as it will go. Then, he is spent and relaxes on top of me. His dick softens and shrinks as it slowly pulls back into his body. I open my mouth wide to release it and he lifts himself to step back from over me.
Shiny is breathless, “Damned, Cady. I thought you didn’t know how to be a mare. That was just incredible.”
With a laugh, “You misunderstand, Shiny. I have sixty eight years of experience being a stallion so I know exactly what it takes to make one happy.”
Shiny looks stunned then opens the biggest grin that I have ever seen, “Ohhh, this is going to be fun. Stand up, Cady. My turn.”
I stand and he starts nibbling on my neck, working up and down the base of my mane. Oh, I like this. Stretching out, I give him easy access.
“hhhmmmm.”
I’m surprised to find that I’m humming and bobbing my head but I don’t care. This just feels so good. Shiny works his way down my neck and across my withers and it just keeps feeling good. We’re going to do this again, I’m sure of it. He keeps going past my withers to do something at the base of my wing and it just pops out like a switchblade. It’s kind of strange but good until he starts chewing on my wing.
“ooohhhoooohhohohohohoohohohohohohnohoh.”
Swinging my head around, I watch him very gently lipping the leading edge of my wing but holy shit it’s sensitive. My tail is whipping wildly and my clit winking at a frantic pace.
“aahhhhaaaaahahahahhhaaaaaahhhhhaaahhahahhahh.”
What is he doing to me! My other wing is stretched out and my legs are shaking. Shiny reaches under my wing and licks the elbow joint. SNAP! Both wings go straight up and Shiny follows. He keeps licking and nibbling my wing joints until my front legs buckle and my tail throws itself over my back. Shiny moves around behind me and I feel his hot breath on my clit. It stops winking and reaches for him.
“OOHH OOHH OOHH OOHH OOHH OOHH”
Blue sparks are flying everywhere as he sucks my clit. Oh! FUCK! He’s sliding his tongue up my clit and deep into my pussy. I can feel every little bump and vein as it crosses my clit. FUCK! FUCK!! FFUCK!!!
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Every nerve in my body is on fire! The blue light is bright and continuous. My eyes hurt.
And I’m laying on my side? Panting. How did this happen? Turning my head, I see Shiny sitting on his butt with a massive hard on and an equally massive grin.
“Damn you, Shiny! You played me like a fiddle.”
I stand back up and shake. Stretching my legs out and placing my hooves wide apart, I throw my tail over my back and give Shiny the best possible access to heaven. My clit is winking wildly again and I can see his erection rubbing his chest as he advances on me.
“OOOOOHHHHH”
He’s blowing on my clit again. Again, it stretches out to him and he nibbles gently on it.
“AAAAAAHHHHH”
As I push back against him, I feel something contract and ripple deep in my pussy. Liquid cascades into Shiny’s mouth and spatters down my legs. My pussy pulls open and I feel Shiny’s breath inside my body. He licks the splatter from my backside and flehmens. My wings snap straight up and I feel a rush of air as Shiny mounts me. His front legs wrap around my barrel at the same time as his dick slides easily into my pussy. He reaches up between my wings and takes a large mouthful of my mane. Thrusting with his hindquarters and pulling hard on my mane, he hilts in me. His hind legs slam into my backside and his dick hits the end of my pussy with every thrust. I push back against him anyway. My pussy is swallowing and want every last bit of him in me.
Blue and rose sparks are filling the room and both our bodies are starting to spasm. His dick is swelling as he begins to deliver his essence into my depths. The sparks are merging and lighting the room like a miniature sun. My joints lock and my wings surround Shiny binding us into a single orgasm with two bodies. My awareness of the room fades.
I’m a bright point in a dark place. I don’t really understand it but it’s a good place, I know that because it is filled with tangible love. Shiny’s love is flowing around me so I gather it and mix it with the love already here. I keep mixing as the combined loves start to glow. The glow slowly coalesces into a tiny bright spark and I feel satisfied. I know complete happiness as my perception gradually returns to the room just in time to feel Shiny’s shrunken dick fall out of me and release a dribble of fluid.
Shiny’s head is resting on my shoulder and his breathing is gradually slowing. I open my mouth to tell him about the strange experience but he starts snoring before I can formulate the words. O. Kay. I’m going to break this habit right now.
My wings are still holding him so I walk calmly to the shower. It takes some finagling and I bend the handle just a little but manage to turn the shower on with my magic. Luckily, I only need to turn one valve. Opening my wings, I slant them as far forward as I can and quickly back Shiny under the shower.
“WWWHHHAAAAAATTTTTT!!!!!”
Shiny thrashes wildly on my back but he can’t just slide off because his butt is against the wall.
“CADY! What are you doing?”
Grinning, “I’m breaking a bad habit. I don’t like you falling asleep before I can tell you how fucking great you are at fucking.”
I step forward and squat, dumping him off on the floor but doesn’t matter. He’s found the hot water valve and the shower is becoming rather pleasant. Straddling the drain, I squat and expel a small dollop of white and gel. My body flushes to finish the job. Apparently I’m retaining a lot of Shiny. I like that.
Walking over to stand next to Shiny, I command in a mock serious voice, “Husband, wash your Wife.”
Shiny salutes, “Yes Your Majesty Ma’am. Right away, Your Majesty Ma’am.”
I can’t help but giggle as Shiny floats the soap over and starts lathering my side, “Work, sex slave, work.”
I’m just so happy I’m not sure I can survive the rush. Shiny looks like he’s matching me joy for joy.
“More soap,” I order.
When he’s got the suds dripping off me, I quickly move in a half circle around him and rub part of the soap off on him.
“There, now you’re lathered too,” I joke.
Shiny just laughs and starts on my other side. We repeat the maneuver amid a storm of giggles. I lift my wings for Shiny to lather the parts under them and rub my chin up and down his back to lather it. Shiny body checks me to under the shower and I rinse off. Stepping to the other end of the shower, I shake and poof while Shiny rinses.
Walking over to me, Shiny asks, “Hey, how did you do that?”
“I’m not completely sure. I know that Princess’ manes are supposed to poof so when mine was wet and limp, I just wanted it dry and fluffy and it happened.”
Shiny looks serious, “Cady, that ‘mane poof’ is high level magic. It’s one of the things that separate a Princess from all other Ponies. I’m impressed.”
With that Shiny hugs me and we kiss. When he backs up, I’m wet again.
“Now look what you’ve done! I’m wet again.”
Grinning, “I know. I want to see you do it.”
Focusing on Shiny, I grab him in a hug and poof again, “Take that, smart ass.”
We’re both dry and poofed. Shiny is looking at his tail with dread.
“CADY! How can I go out in public like this?”
I laughing, “You’re a Prince, aren’t you? Why shouldn’t a Prince poof like a Princess?”
Looking pained, “This is not regulation military.”
I walk out to the toilet leaving Shiny to contemplate if he wants to shower again to get rid of the poof.
After I do my business, “Shiny, if you’ll endure it for tonight, I promise I’ll show you how to fix it in the morning.”
I move off to bed as Shiny takes my place at the toilet. In a minute he joins me in the bed and we lay kissing and lipping each other. Looking into his eyes, I see myself reflected and dream of what the future will bring. We talk about life as a Royal Pony and relatives that I’ve never met between kisses and nuzzles. I think about sleep but this sharing is just so wonderful I can’t let it go. It makes me even happier than the world class sex.
After some indeterminate number of hours of talking and letting the love flow around us, we hear pans in the kitchen.
“I didn’t order anything. Did you?” “No, but I bet it means it’s time to get up anyway.”
Spike is in the kitchen making tea, “Good morning, Cadance, Shining. Twilight has gone to fetch you a change of clothes and should be back any minute.”
I just manage to taste my tea when a soft ‘pop’ sounds in the main room followed by a voice, “Hello everypony. I’m back.”
Twilight has a fresh uniform for Shiny and all my regalia.
“Thank you, Twilight,” I say, “You know you are going to have to help me put it on? I don’t have a clue.”
Twilight laughs, “Come on.”
It turns out there’s not that much to it, a kinda necklace, a small crown, and hoof guards. Poofing my mane, I look in the mirror and I look damned good. I’ve learned to move with some grace and I have a glow that shows from inside. Hell, I might even convince myself that I’m a Princess.
When I turn around, Twilight is staring at me. Shaking herself, “That will definitely do. Let’s go”
Shiny looks like the ultimate strong military stallion and he has the glow too. We look damned good. Twilight takes us down the hall and around the corner to a nondescript door. Inside is a nice private dining room complete with two Princesses. Twilight sits beside Celestia while Shiny and I settle across from her. We decide on oatmeal with fruit.
Celestia is appraising us carefully, “You look really good this morning, both of you. Luna tells me that several of the Night Guard complained of eye injury last night but nothing after midnight. Did you fall asleep?”
Shiny is blushing so I have to rub it in, “Shiny slept for about two minutes but we talked for the entire night. In fact, if Twilight hadn’t come we would probably still be talking this time tomorrow. We have both learned a lot but there is one thing that I want to ask you and Twilight about.”
Celestia nods so I continue, “Good fun and great orgasms were had by all but something different happened with the final orgasm. It simultaneous and in the traditional position. I found myself in a dark place. It wasn’t a bad place, it was warm and safe and I think it was a part of me. Anyway, it was filled with love and I could feel Shiny’s love flowing around me so I . . captured? . . channeled? . . his love and mixed it with the love that was already there. It began to glow and condensed into a tiny spark. When I saw the spark, I was completely happy and returned to the outside world. I have some suspicions what it means but I want to hear it from you.”
Celestia is completely focused on me now, “May I examine you?
Holding my breath, I nod.
The golden glow touches me then Celestia breaks out a solar class smile, “You have good reason to be happy, Cadance, you’re pregnant. We’ve always known that Alicorn reproduction had at least as much to do with magic as biology but we never knew the key . . . until now.”
Twilight is running in circles and dancing with Spike. Luna is doing a great Cheshire Cat impression. And Shiny and I are just kissing and feeling great. I eat all of my breakfast and part of Shiny’s. I’ve got to get good nutrition now that I’m eating for two. And then that other question bubbles back to the surface.
Looking across the table, “Twilight, I have another question that may be more up your line. Can we open that portal right now? It could be very important.”
Celestia looks at me like I just suggested a shit sandwich, “Why? Surely not to taunt her.”
I shake my head, “Do Ponies experience diabetes?”
Celestia is confused but Twilight speaks right up, “You mean like when an old Pony has to watch their diet carefully because their body is less able to process sugar?”
I nod, “I mean exactly like that. James, that’s the name that goes with that body on Earth, James is an insulin dependent diabetic. If he doesn’t take insulin injections before every meal, the sugar could kill him. He needs that explained to him.”
Twilight answers, “All it should take is for you to touch your horn to the mirror and will it. Some portals have a set time but I doubt she could have managed the extra complication.”
“Will you help me? I want Shiny to be my physical security and I need somepony else to be my magic backup,” I beg.
Twilight nods, “We can go right now if you want to.”
Celestia speaks up, “I can come too.”
Thinking for a moment, “No thanks, Celestia. Legally, it’s my problem. Safety wise, it’s a small room and there are guns in James’s house.”
Celestia regards me with a raised eyebrow, “Very well, I trust your judgment. But do not hesitate to call me if anything at all goes wrong.”
Twilight and Spike come around to the same side of the table with me and Shiny.
Kneeling down, I look Spike in the eye, “Spike, you aren’t going in that room. There are exactly two safe places and Twilight and Shiny are going to be in them. Do we agree?”
He nods and we gather together. Suddenly we are on the plaza in front of the Crystal Castle. Shiny leads us up the stairs to the place I dread most. Rummaging in a drawer, I find a thick bracelet and pass it to Shiny.
I instruct Shiny, “Run the chain holding the amulet through that and be sure it’s locked. When we open the portal, it will be around my neck with the bracelet hidden in my mane. You stand over in the corner behind the mirror and watch. If anything looks or sounds even a little bit off, grab that bracelet in your magic and throw it across the room. That will break the chain and I will be freed from the amulet. If it’s a false alarm, we’ll just fix the chain and try again.”
Shiny goes to work on the bracelet and I turn to Twilight, “Stand in the door so you’re behind the mirror. Watch for any kind of trap or magic threat and teleport us out of here or whatever you think is best to eliminate the threat. Same thing for false alarms.”
They take their places and I hang the amulet over my neck. Touching the mirror, I will it to open and it takes on a familiar blue tint. In a few seconds the fog clears and I’m looking at Jack’s empty couch. The other amulet is in plain sight on the coffee table and so are a bunch of candy wrappers and some empty pie and cake plates.
I call out, “Hello? Is anypony home? Yoo. Hoo.”
Nothing. No movement or sound at all. The portal is a window, not a screen so I should be able to move around and see more. Nothing new on the right. Same for the left. Then I look down and on the floor right in front of the TV I see what I don’t want to see.
I snatch the amulet off the table with my magic and the instant that it crosses the threshold I spin around and kick the mirror as hard as I can. It shatters into about a million pieces.
“Shiny, take both amulets and put them somewhere safe. The translation aspect may be a vital tool someday. Until then I don’t even want to know where they are. When that’s done meet us in our kitchen. Twilight, let’s go sit and talk.”
Twilight, Spike, and I retire to the kitchen and just stare at each other across the table for a few minutes.
Twilight finally asks, “Did you just decide to destroy the portal or did you see something?”
Pleading with Twilight, “Please don’t ask that question. By all that’s holy, you don’t want to know. We are all safe now and that is what is important.”
Twilight is not happy, but, “So. Where do we go from here?”
I answer, “We go back to Canterlot and I will inform Celestia. We’ll talk, have lunch, collect all my books, and Shiny and I will take the chariot back here and have a very happy life. We will trade frequent visits and you will concentrate on teaching me high level magics like teleportation. In eleven months you will be here to assist in the birth of our foal and we will all literally live happily ever after.”
Shiny had walked in around the middle of that speech, “Does ‘ever after’ include more foals?”
Pledging to Shiny, “Yes it does. And love. And happiness. And a little entertainment.”
I tell Celestia privately what I had seen, way more than enough sugar to throw James into ketoacidosis and a human foot already turning black. Celestia agrees to never tell Twilight or Shiny and I get to work transitioning from a tired old man into a very happy magic Princess ruling a wonderful land with the help of a great family.
Eight months later . . .
I’ve moved on from baby bump to baby body and it’s a fine strong baby. I can tell by the way my belly bulges when he kicks. Alicorn strength helps a lot but it can’t make up for a different shape. Chairs are a special challenge typified by my current situation. I’m receiving a dignitary from Griffonstone in my Throne Room, sitting on my Throne the only way I can, draped across it so I can lean back more. My visitors are treated to a full view of my stretched belly and growing teats but if they’re waiting for me to be ashamed of our pregnancy they had better pack a big lunch.
Lord Greyfeather is a typical ruling class Griffon, loud, arrogant, and biased. He wants access to some of the new products we’ve started making in the Crystal Empire. I begged him to let our staffs rough out the treaty but he wouldn’t hear of underlings meddling in Noble affairs. Then he wouldn’t talk to Shiny because Shiny doesn’t have wings and ‘only another flier can truly understand him’. Now he has said in not very many words that he approves of the pregnant look but thinks I should take it back to the kitchen.
About a hundred Ponies are waiting behind him to see what my response is going to be. It’s been an uphill battle but my Ponies are beginning to trust me now. They smile and greet me instead of hiding or cowering. Shiny is in the observer’s balcony over the main doors.
Addressing Greyfeather in my Royal Voice, “No.”
Greyfeather stutters, “What do you mean ‘no’? Do you believe that you can just refuse a blooded warrior?”
Standing and fluffing my wings, “Are you challenging me, the ruling Princess of an Empire, Lord Greyfeather? I’ve fought Sombra and Chrysalis for this Throne and I’m the one sitting here. Who have you fought?”
Shiny has a hoof stuffed in his mouth to stifle the laughter but some of the spectators aren’t so polite. I glare at them and get silence.
Directing my attention back to Greyfeather, “Well?”
Puffing up like a toad, Greyfeather declares, “I’ll not soil my honor with the blood of a gravid female.”
Staring him into the floor, “You don’t have that ability. Now, do you want to make this deal?”
“Of course I do . . .” and I cut him off.
I sit back down and detail the method for him, “Then get your staff to draft a proposal and send it to my staff. My staff will send them a counter proposal. Let them go back and forth until we have something that conforms to both our wishes and laws. Then they’ll draft a Letter of Intent and when it’s agreeable, we’ll sign and publish it. After a few weeks for anypony with objections to be heard, we’ll meet here and sign the final treaty. I don’t care how you supervise your staff, I trust mine.”
“That will take months,” he screeches.
I nod, “And in about two and a half months I will lose interest. So maybe you should get your staff here and get them busy. I’ll have my Ponies ready for their arrival. . . . Next?”
The Griffon huffs a couple of times then charges out the Throne Room door. As soon as the door closes behind him my Ponies are laughing and cheering. I motion for them to quiet down.
“Please, it isn’t polite to laugh at your neighbors. Just smile, nod your head, and make lots of bits off him.”
My Ponies are proud of me and I can feel it. They’ve come back to Court to be heard or just to watch. When I fly, I quickly attract a large escort. The Crystal Empire is a better, happier place and I love it.
I’m going to end this journal here. I’ll get Shiny to put it with the amulets and seal everything away for the far future. By then Twilight will have some foals and maybe even Celestia and Luna too. We can have a giant family get together on the one thousandth anniversary or something like that and treat it like a time capsule. Until then . . . .