Not Another Invader ZIM Crossover!by theRedBronyChaptersHe Comes With a Doggie Costume!The Wrong Side of the Bed...The Nightmare BeginsHe Comes With a Doggie Costume!Author's Note: Hey guys! This chapter kinda has a lot of dialog and exposition, hopefully it's not too boring. Enjoy! The hut in the middle of a forest populated by mythical beasts was now filled with six very colorful alien ponies, one blinged-out rhyming zebra, a little green alien invader, his defective robot minion, two humans (one of them scary in her own right), and a very heavy awkward silence. It was safe to say things were getting a bit weird. And then there was that sound again. Dib looked in the direction of his sister, the only possible source, and yet found nothing out of the ordinary with her. Squinty eyes? Check. Stoic expression? Check. Scary presence? Check. Maybe her cell phone made the squealing sound? Could she possibly have a signal wherever she was? Maybe it was a low battery sound? Dib cast aside these thoughts and faced the new creatures that had entered the hut. These were probably the 'ponies' Zecora spoke of. "HI TWILIGHT!" GIR shouted at the purple unicorn in front of him. He stood there smiling with his tongue sticking out, waving his little hand very fast. The pony GIR had named Twilight recoiled back, in what looked like disgust at the little metal guy, holding a forehoof off the ground, as if shielding herself from it. Fluttershy spoke up, albeit very softly, "Um… Twilight, these um… creatures… are called 'humins.' " "Yes, Twilight my dear, now listen here. I was resting when a great wind hit my humble abode, I looked out my window and saw something explode! Outside I went to check the sound, but instead these four I found," Zecora added with a gentle smile in the direction of the newcomers. All the other ponies behind Twilight just stood still in various degrees of shock, awe, and confusion. "Um… is that a robot? And how'd he know my name?!" The purple unicorn asked, cautiously flicking her raised hoof in the direction of the freaky metal thing, still very confused by all this. "Ah, yes… he's my uh… *mumble* Information Retrieval unit! Yes! It is his job to gather such informaSHUNNNN!" Zim informed her, pointing a finger up in the air. "How DID he know that?" Zim mumbled under his breath, wondering if the little guy might have somehow actually started working right for a change. "I thought… he was a dog…" Fluttershy pointed out. "SILENCE!" Zim snapped at Fluttershy. He glanced over to Gaz and decided not to say any more. Twilight finally noticed her yellow friend off in a corner, "Oh, hi Fluttershy, no wonder you weren't home. What are you doing here?" "Oh, um, I heard the explosion too… I came to see if Zecora was OK, but she wasn't here. But then she came back, and these humins were following her. They're um…" Fluttershy looked to Zim for a moment, "…nice." "Oh… well then…" Twilight turned back to the strange new creatures. GIR was still smiling and waving at her. Wearing an uneasy smile, she managed to say, "Um… hello. My name is Twilight Sparkle. You've already met Zecora and Fluttershy, these are the rest of my friends." She moved aside to let them commence introductions. A pink one took Twilight's gesture as the green light to introduce herself. "HI! My name's Pinkie Pie! Are you aliens?! OOOOH! Aren't you the cutest little robot I've ever seen! *Giggle-snort* You're the first little robot I've ever seen! But still!" She picked GIR up in her forehooves. "WEEEE! HI PINKIE!" GIR shouted, and continued smiling and waving really fast. "So what're your names?!" Pinkie asked, putting GIR down. Both Dib and Zim looked to Gaz, who rushed to be the one to do the introductions last time, but she was just standing there, strangely still and silent, making no move to begin. 'Why is she so quiet?' Dib thought. "I'm Dib, this is my sister Gaz, and…" "I AM ZIMMMMMM!!!" Zim loudly proclaimed with one hand proudly upon his chest, and the other pointing a finger in the air. Pinkie Pie giggled at their names. "You have funny names! I like them! What's your name little guy?" GIR's eyes turned red and his expression became serious as he saluted Pinkie Pie. "GIR reporting for duty." After a brief pause, his eyes turned green again. "Hehehehehe! I said 'dooty,' " GIR said, giggling some more. Pinkie giggled with him. A white unicorn stepped forward. "Ahem…" she said, trying to speak over the laughter, "my name is Rarity. It is… a pleasure… to meet your… acquaintance," she said nervously, ending with a weak, awkward smile. An orange pony wearing a hat stepped up next. She tipped her hat at them. "Howdy! Ahm Applejack! Pleasure ta meet y'all!" Finally, a visibly very tired light blue one with wild rainbow hair trotted wearily forward from behind her friends. "Sup. I'm Rainbow Dash," she said from behind tired eyes. "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Zim inhaled, "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" He finished, bent over from laughing so hard, still chuckling in between breaths. "Hey! What's so funny green guy?!" Rainbow dash said with irritation behind those tired eyes. She walked over to him, almost losing her balance for a second on the way over. "You're…! You're rainbow colored…!" Zim panted to catch his breath, "and…! and you're name is…!" He finally looked up to see that the filthy rainbow horse thing was an inch away from his face, "Rainbow…" "Yea? Laugh at my name again. I dare you," she dared, pressing her muzzle against his… face. Zim just gulped. He thought she might almost be as scary as Gaz, if it weren't for her ridiculous hair color. Zecora gave them both an annoyed look, and was just about to tell them to take it outside again. "That's what I thought." Rainbow turned, flicking her tail in Zim's face, and walked back towards the two real humans, who had not yet offended her. "Wow. You look really tired," Dib said as he pointed at her. "Yea, they woke me up," she answered unenthusiastically. "Hey, are those wings?" Dib pointed to Rainbow's side. She nodded, "Yea… I'm a pegasus, doy," saying it as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Wow! So you can fly?!" Rainbow perked up a little at this chance to boast. "Buck yea I can fly!" She said as she unfurled her wings and gave them a few flaps. "I'm the fastest flier in all of Equestria!" She floated a few inches off the floor and proudly held a hoof to her chest. "Eh? Uh-quest-tree-uhHHHH…? Is that the name of this WRETCHED horse planet?" Asked Zim. Twilight answered, "Um, no, it's the name of our nation. The planet we call Earth." Zim and Dib looked at each other, then back to Twilight. "Are you saying you're not from this planet?" She asked with a large helping of disbelief in her voice and a raised eyebrow. "Well, uh," Dib gestured to his sister and himself, "we're from Earth…" He paused, not knowing how to explain the fact that they were all indeed aliens. Dib had a really hard time wrapping his head around the idea that HE was the invader now, sort of. "But it's a different Earth," Gaz finally said. Her brother was beginning to wonder if she had fallen asleep on her feet. It was hard to tell with her squinty eyes. Why was she being so quiet anyway? This seemed to be going a little beyond her normal 'I don't care about anything' attitude towards everything in general. "Um… I don't suppose you…" Twilight was interrupted by loud obnoxious giggling from Pinkie and GIR. "…know what that explosion was?" "Oh that! That was just my um…" Zim started. "Zim's ship exploded," Gaz finished. "LIES!" Zim shouted. A brief pause because of his outburst... "How did you know?" Zim demanded. "I saw it before we landed. Duh." "You mean 'crashed'?" Zim quipped with a sarcastic grin. "At least our ship didn't explode." "Just like dis: KA-BOOM!!!" GIR shouted out of nowhere. "Wait a minute, hold on," Twilight interrupted, "What kind of ships are we talking about here?" "Spaceships?" Dib offered. "Really?" Twilight asked with curious look. She received a few slight nods from Dib, Gaz, and Zim. "I told you that was an alien spaceship landing!" Pinkie pointed a hoof towards Twilight. "She did say that once or twice…" Applejack added. "So that means that you're… that this…" There was then a visible gleam in Twilight's dilated pupils, as she clapped her forehooves together once in realization. "This is first contact! How wonderful!" "So y'all really are aliens? How the hay are ya speakin' Equestrian?" Applejack asked, trying, almost instinctively, to determine the truth. Dib raised an index finger and inhaled to begin the explanation. But instead of words coming out of his mouth, there were only questions coming into his head. His finger fell limp. Disregarding the language's name of 'Equestrian,' verbal communication with these creatures was, so far, completely seamless. For that matter, thought Dib, how had Zim been able to speak English so well? It went even further than that: over the years, Dib had managed to talk with Zim's leaders a couple of times. And although they paid no attention to him and his empty threats, they could at least understand what he was saying, and vice versa. He looked to Zim, who understood the question, and only responded by shaking his head 'no' with a blank face, a big shrug, and an open-mouthed mumble that roughly sounded like 'I don't know.' "Hey guys! Look! He comes with a doggie costume!" Pinkie held up GIR dressed in his dog suit. "MeeeoooOWWWW!" GIR said, waving his nubby little arms. This prompted snickers and giggles from the ponies, zebra, and even a little bit from Gaz. Except for the more refined Rarity, who simply asked, "Is that a… zipper?" She was probably the only equine in the room who would recognize a zipper when she saw one. "Eh?" Zim glanced over to his robot minion. "That's a… collar! You know, like a dog… collar… tag… Yes! Dogs have collars, right?" "Oh give it up Zim! That dog costume is terrible! And so is your pitiful disguise!" Dib shouted at his nemesis. "What are you talking about?" Zim casually said, trying to act oblivious. Of course, he now had the full attention of everyone in the hut. Even GIR and Pinkie. "He's an ALIEN!" Dib pointed an accusing finger at Zim. "Well, you know, like a real alien! Like… um… you know? Not-a-human alien!" "LIES! LIES! THE FEELTHY EARTH BOY LIESSSS!" Zim grew nervous, and started sweating. He looked at all the stinking creatures looking at him accusingly. Dib and Gaz had seen him undisguised plenty of times, but Dib was crazy and no one listened to him. Gaz just didn't care. And on the few rare occasions his cover had been blown to anyone else, he usually managed to talk his way out of it, the stupid Earth humans were pretty gullible, after all. But now he had a whole room full of people staring at him. Thoughts of being dissected by human scientists began to flood his mind. "I'm a human! Yep! Human, human, human! Perfectly normal human!" He tugged on his collar nervously, smiling uneasily. "I'M NORMAL!" "Zim! You MORON! They're not humans! We're not even on the same planet anymore!" Dib shouted at Zim. As much as he hated to admit it, his large-headed human nemesis was right. Zim had been undercover for so long that his human guise had become a second skin to him. In fact, it had gotten to the point where the only reason he would take off the wig and contact lenses was because they were uncomfortable. Otherwise, he might have left them on all day long, even in the privacy of his home -slash- secret base. He wondered for a moment if he would be nervous like this even around his fellow Irkens, being undisguised. And for how long? Would he always be uncomfortable out of disguise? Was he mentally scarred for life? Doomed to feel more comfortable in the form of one of the filthy stupid inhabitants of the very planet he was trying to conquer for the good of his true race? "Earth to Zim," Gaz stated flatly, snapping her fingers. "Eh?" Zim snapped out of his daze. "Do it already," She egged him on to remove his disguise. Zim understood and reluctantly placed one hand on the bouffant front part of his wig, and slowly lifted it off his head. All the ponies (but not Zecora who had seen him already), and even GIR, gasped at his revealed antennae. Using both hands, one for each eye, he then pinched his contact lenses off of his huge Irken eyeballs, revealing their true pupil-less solid pink appearance, which earned another gasp from most of the onlookers, and a curious "Ooooh…" from the pink one. Zim cringed as he looked back up at all the things staring at him. While the other two looked like shaved apes with clothes and funny mane-styles, Zim's appearance was more akin to the ponies' general idea of what an actual space alien might look like, which prompted this long awkward silence. "So… if you're not a… human… then what are you?" Twilight inquired. "I'm Irken," he begrudgingly replied, even though he should have been proud of his answer. Zim put his wig and contacts back on. "Have you been hiding so long your true form, that it no longer feels like the norm?" Zecora asked with a concerned face, trying to offer moral support by walking closer to the little green guy. It was as if the zebra beast had read his mind. "Of course not! I just don't like them staring at me!" Zim lied as he pointed a shaky finger at the ponies. There was another moment of silence as the ponies all exchanged glances at each other. "Can we go home now? I'm tired of all this talking," Rainbow complained. "Well, um… I don't know. Applejack? Do you think these… new friends of ours could sleep in your barn?" Twilight asked the farm pony. "I- I s'pose so…" She answered. "They could stay at my house!" Fluttershy butt in. "I mean um… if that's ok…" On the walk through the dark, creepy forest… "I wonder if dad's noticed we're gone…" Dib mused aloud. "Meh," Gaz returned. "What?" Was all Dib could say to her answer after having been nearly beaten to death by her for making her miss dinner night with dad. Was all that only for the pizza…? Dib was pretty sure it was also for missing rare quality time with their father… Meanwhile, on a different Earth… Tap, tap, tap, tap A black rubber boot impatiently tapped on the floor. "Gaz, come in Gaz." "Dib, come in Dib." "Hmm… it's been THREE hours now, and still no sign of my children," Professor Membrane said to the walls of his empty house with a clenched fist. "It's not like Gaz to miss our annual family dinner night! Maybe Dib, but not Gaz!" He tried looking at the computer screen displaying a map that would show where in the world his children's wrist watches-slash-video communicators were at the moment, but alas, the locations of either could still not be found. "Well, if their locations can't be found, that leaves only three possible options! ONE! Both of their communicators are in a Faraday cage that's blocking the GPS signals. TWO! Both of them were completely and utterly DESTROYED by a nuclear explosion, the only possible thing that could damage the locators in those communicators! Or THREE! They are no longer on the planet…" The professor stroked his chin with his black rubber-gloved hand through the very tall collar on his lab coat that covered even his nose. Professor Membrane had long since grown used to his son's INSANE talk about aliens and spaceships. But now he wondered. "My poor, insane son…" "Professor!" A voice called from seemingly nowhere. Membrane's goggles lit up and inside he could see a video call from one of his subordinates. "Are you done with…" the scientist held up a paper, "the 'annual family dinner night' yet? You have a meeting with the Secretary of Defense in half an hour!" "I won't be able to make it." "What?! Sir, you can't just blow him off, he's had this appointment for over a year!" "Well, tell him we'll have to reschedule," And with that, the pulled the wire to his goggles, unplugging them and abruptly ending the call. As much help as his squadron of assistants could offer in finding his children, he knew how they could get when he tried to avoid his appointments. Besides, this was something he had to do himself. Back to his previous train of thought, he recalled Dib mentioning a spaceship he was working on in the garage. And although Professor Membrane knew his son had his father's intelligence, he still expected nothing more than a garbage can with fireworks tied to it, or some other juvenile attempt. Opening the door to the garage, he flicked on the light switch and looked around. "No wonder I don't park in here anymore." Author's Note In case you don't think the pony planet is called 'Earth,' please see the Hearth's Warming Eve episode, wherein Pinkie Pie, as Chancellor Puddinghead (therefore she theoretically had rehearsed lines), says, "The Earth is round, there is no up or down." Sorry no Minimoose yet, I have plans for him though! Also, please comment! I read all of them, honest! Let me know what you guys think so far. And if you haven't already, please 'follow' me! I promise I won't spam your notifications with a bunch of worthless blog posts. I just have some interesting fics in the works, and you might like them! The Wrong Side of the Bed...Zim stared blankly at the rustic wood ceiling through the darkness. All the other less intelligent beings in the room were already fast asleep. And so were the little vermin. The Dib human occupied another space on the floor, comfortably out of smelling range from Zim. The scary human female had claimed the couch. The yellow pony beast that owned this filthy vermin-ridden residence was upstairs in her bedroom. And thankfully the little fur monsters gave Zim a very wide berth, they practically scattered as he entered the place, except for that little white one with big ears. That one stood his ground. Zim rolled over to his side (laying on his pak was less than comfortable). The blankets strewn on the wood floor that he lay on were actually fairly cozy. Zim contemplated what he should do next. It had been many Earth years since Zim had partaken in this 'sleep.' Irken biology (with the help of their paks) did not require it. He had always thought it to be a waste of precious time. But right now, laying there in the silent darkness with nothing better to do, he decided to try it. Zim woke slowly to the sound of clanging metal. As he came too, drooling on his pillow, he realized he had no idea where he was. So naturally, the first thing that came to mind was, "AHHHHH!!!! I'VE BEEN CAPTURED!!!" He screamed as he jumped up and starting running in a circle. Dib couldn't help himself, after his third or fourth time around, Dib stuck his leg out in Zim's path. Zim tripped and faceplanted on the floor, sliding forward a few feet, his face stirring up some dust from the hardwood floor. He removed his face from the floor, shook his head to make his eyes point the right way again, and looked up. "Whaaaa?" Fluttershy and Gaz stared at him, from next to the home's stone hearth, Gaz was snickering a bit from that epic faceplant, and she was holding a cooking pot of some kind. Fluttershy actually displayed a look of concern for the poor hurt alien. The Dib human was standing behind him a few feet, whistling, with his hands behind his back. And even that furry white vermin stood on the floor in the middle of the room, staring him down, with his tiny arms crossed. Zim got up and chuckled in nervous embarrassment, and goose-stepped over to the couch and sat down. Dib joined him, with an adequate amount of personal space between the two, of course. "You didn't see that," Zim said, pointing at Dib. "Yes I did…" Dib retorted. "SILENCE!" Zim barked. "Man, Zim, looks like you woke up on the wrong side of the bed!" "Eh? I wasn't even on a bed!" "It's a figure of sp… oh, never mind." Desperate to change the subject, Zim asked, "What are THEY doing?" "Making breakfast, I think." "Brek-FESSSST?! I don't suppose they're making… wafflessss…?" "I dunno." "Hmm…" Zim got up and walked to the breakfast makers. "YOU! Scary human child and filthy wing-ed horse beast!" He received a blank stare from Gaz but Fluttershy just looked away. "Are you making waffleSSS for brek-fest???" Zim inquired with wide eyes and a look of anticipation. Fluttershy squeaked out an "Um…" And Gaz answered, "Oatmeal and eggs." Zim responded with a disappointed grunt, and hung his head low as he meandered back to sit on the couch. He had grown quite fond of these human 'waffles' over the years. It was one of the few Earth foods that did not make him wretch, but after he got used to them, he actually started liking them. "Your… sibling… she seems to be quite friendly with the horse beast," Zim noted. Dib took notice of his sister, over by the fireplace, cooking breakfast with the yellow pegasus. "Yea, she…" He trailed off as he noticed something very, very wrong with his beloved sister. She was smiling. Not an evil smile, a diabolical grin, or even a smartass sarcastic smirk. But a real, albeit small, quite genuine smile. Dib was rendered speechless. Gaz was never the cheery type, quite the opposite, actually. To see her smile was… frightening. Even more so than her usual scary demeanor and very real threats of bodily harm. Zim waved his little hand in front of Dib's face. It did not faze him. "HEY! HELLO?!" Zim shouted at his dazed enemy. Dib shook his head and looked at Zim. "Wha?" "Where's GIR?!" Zim demanded. The human boy looked around the room briefly and shrugged. "HEY! WHERE'S MY DOG?!" Zim shouted over to the cooks. "Who cares?" Gaz casually responded. "Um… I think he went outside, um… a while ago…" Fluttershy answered. "Eh?" Zim ran to the front door in a panic, knowing full well what that little robot was capable of when left alone. He swung the door open, got a glimpse of what was outside, and then slammed it shut. He grit his teeth and leaned his back against the door, as if bracing it. RRRRROOOOOOOAAAARRRRR A ferocious lion's roar was heard by all inside the cottage. Most of the small critters scurried back to their hiding places. A moment later, the door opened, with Zim still attached to it. GIR (in his dog suit) merrily strolled inside, turned back and yelled out the door, "BYE MISTER MANTICORE! I'll seeya later!" He waved his little hand briefly and closed the door, taking Zim with it. Zim stepped away from the door, "GIR! What are you doing?! That beast tried to eat me last night!!!" "I dunno, he seems nice!" GIR innocently responded. Even Fluttershy seemed put off by what was implied. After breakfast, Zim didn't touch his (GIR happily ate it for him), there was a knock at the door. Fluttershy answered it, and two ponies, who had previously introduced themselves as Twilight Sparkle and Pinkie Pie, cantered into the cottage. Well, the pink one more 'bounced' than 'cantered.' Greetings were said by all but Zim. Twilight then announced the reason she was present, "Well, we came to the conclusion that you all should come to town and we'll introduce you to everypony..." "Uh… Twilight… do you think that's a good idea? We might kinda… freak out the natives…" Dib suggested. "Especially Zim," he deadpanned as he pointed a thumb behind him to the little invader. "Don't be silly!" Pinkie gleefully answered. "I thought about that. That's why Pinkie here is going around town inviting everypony to the…" "PARTY!!!" Pinkie jumped in front of Twilight and finished her sentence. Twilight nudged her friend out of her view. "…And she'll be explaining to them the nature of your… nature." "This is SO exciting! I've never been so excited! I've never thrown a party for ALIENS before! This is going to be super-duper-FUN!" Pinkie bounced around the room. "That sounds um… nice," Fluttershy commented with a small smile. Dib noticed that Gaz was smiling again. Perhaps even more than last time. Since when did she like parties? Especially parties thrown by alien equines? "Well we just dropped by to tell, er, invite you," Twilight started, "I'm afraid you'll all have to wait here until sundown, then we'll walk you into town for the welcoming party." She ended with a smile. 'These ponies sure are nice. They're throwing a welcoming party for aliens…' Dib thought to himself. If aliens were ever found on his own world, they'd probably be captured and dissected. He would know, he planned to do that to Zim when he first discovered him. Then again, at the time, he knew Zim's race was planning on multiple hostile planetary takeovers. Of course, over time, he discovered that the Irken Empire had no interest in his Earth, but he still had to protect it from Zim. 'These FILTHY horse beasts are actually quite hosPITable. I wish the Earth humans would have thrown ME a party when I got there.' Zim thought to himself. He knew from factual human media, such as movies, that aliens were hated on Earth. He would surely be dissected if he were ever found out and captured. His human nemesis had intended to do it himself when they first met. Despite the threat of capture, he had to stick to his mission. He had to take over his Earth. He did not want to disappoint his Tallest Leaders, who had entrusted him with this highly secret mission on the mystery planet. Pinkie stopped bouncing. "Oh yea! The party! I have to get started inviting everypony! I don't have much time! I'm inviting the whole town!" She made for the door. "PINKIE! Can I come with you?" GIR gave Pinkie his best set of puppy dog eyes. Not terribly difficult considering he was in a dog suit. "Aww… of course you can come with me, GIR!" Pinkie smiled at him. GIR jumped up on Pinkie's back. "YAAAAAAAYYYYY!!!" He clapped his nubby hands together in excitement. The pink mare walked out the door and bounced on her way, humming a merry tune, with GIR riding on her back. Twilight watched as her bouncy pink friend and the alien's mischievous robot-slash-pet dog faded into the distance, headed towards town. She wondered what kind of trouble those two would get into… Later… An air raid siren wails in the distance. The sun is darkened by a blanket of grey smoke, being continually replenished by the many house fires throughout the town. Thatched roofs are quite flammable, apparently. The townsponies run wild in the streets, in a full on panic. 'Help!' 'Save me!' 'The horror!' These are the cries heard amongst the sounds of raging fires, screams, and galloping hooves. In the town square, a lone light-purple unicorn filly with a blonde mane sits crying. She looks up and sniffles, "Where's mommy?" An explosion is heard in the distance. Twilight shook her head to clear these thoughts. A little smirk played its way across her face. "Nah, that'd never happen," she said to herself. Meanwhile, on a different Earth… Professor Membrane was looking at all the clutter in his garage. Tools and parts were strewn everywhere. Several large bundles of wires connected to computers on one end, were all hanging loose at the other end. All these wires' loose ends lay in a circular pattern on the floor. Something was there, something that all that stuff was hooked up to. And it wasn't there anymore. Still, though, the amount of work and technology going into whatever was there was way more than what Membrane expected. This was truly on par with even his own personal projects. He looked around. Nothing there was out of the ordinary. Screwdrivers, wrenches, hammers, band saw, belt sander, weed whacker, electrical components… what was this? Professor Membrane picked up a pink cylindrical item. About the size and shape of an energy drink can, it had a few wires coming from the top. And some… foreign… writing on the side, with what appeared to be a manufacturer's logo. A black triangle with a circle in the middle. He pocketed the device in his lab coat and left the garage, flicking the light switch off on his way out. He walked back to his computer and sat in front of it. With elbows on the desk, he meshed his gloved fingers and rested his chin upon them, his lab coat's collar still somehow managing to hide his nose in this position. "Computer, play last transmission from Gaz's communicator." The screen displayed some white noise, then a view of a very irritated Gaz. She turned her squinty eyes to the screen, and addressed her audience. "Hi dad. We should be home by seven." She was interrupted by a loud maniacal laughter. After it, the same voice said something incomprehensible. "Pause," ordered Membrane, "Replay last three seconds." Membrane could barely make out a few words, namely: moon, tidal waves, his son's name, and doom. While contemplating what those words implied, the professor noticed a black smudge in the picture, just above his son's hair. "Zoom in. Enhance. Zoom in. Enhance. Enhance." There it was again, the triangle logo, on a wall (or something) behind his son. He pulled the pink device from his lab coat's pocket to double check. "Resume play." Gaz looked back at the screen. "Sorry dad, Dib's friend Zim is being annoying. Gotta go." And that was it, the last thing he heard from them. 'Zim' was familiar. Indeed Membrane had even met his deranged son's very normal green foreign friend. Membrane ruminated on his last thought for a moment. Particularly the part about Zim being green and foreign. 'No.' Membrane thought to himself. He refused to believe that his son's friend was an alien. That notion was just ridiculous. He knew Dib wanted to be a 'paranormal investigator,' but he figured that he'd give in and turn to REAL science eventually. Not wanting to think about this any longer, he decided to go investigate his son's room. Once inside, he looked around. The place was a mess. Not the usual teenage boy's messy room, but something more akin to what the Professor's room looked like when he was his son's age. He smiled behind that high collar of his. 'Chip off the old block' he thought. Papers and books were scattered everywhere. A massive corkboard along the wall above the desk held papers with diagrams, schematics, and equations. The desk itself had several computer monitors. Two of which were displaying camera feeds. All but one camera feed were displaying some kind of factory or laboratory. The one that wasn't was showing the outside of a house. A house with freakishly large lawn gnomes. He wondered if this was Zim's house. He figured it was as good a place as any to start looking for his children. The last thing Gaz said was that Zim was 'being annoying,' so they must have been with him. Membrane shifted some papers around on the desk, hoping to find a clue where Zim's house might be. He looked around some more before he gave up. Sighing, he scratched his chin. As he turned to leave, he spotted a huge map on the corkboard. 'How did I miss that?' The map was of a few residential streets, with a cul-de-sac right in the middle, and a red circle around a property. He un-tacked the map from the corkboard and took it with him. He left his house, got in his car, and drove to the address. Parking in front of the strange house, Membrane got out of his car and approached the residence. This was the place with the freakishly large lawn gnomes. There were also a pink lawn flamingo, a blow fish, and a sign that read 'I <3 EARTH.' He approached the door and couldn't shake the feeling that the gnomes were watching him. 'Men' the sign on the door read. Now very intrigued by the owner's taste in decoration, he pressed the doorbell button. Almost immediately, the door opened to reveal two robots. "Welcome home, son!" They said in unison. The robots looked like cliché parents, almost caricatures. Membrane easily saw right through the guise, but still went on to talk to them as though they were real people. Perhaps they were built for the precise purpose of answering the door. "Excuse me, is 'Zim' home?" He asked. Receiving only a blank stare from the slightly sparky robot pair, he was about to decide what to do next when all of a sudden, a small purple blob with moose antlers floated up from behind the door answerers. "MEEP!" The blob squeaked. Author's Note Professor Membrane's part became twice as long as I originally intended, because I wanted to squeeze Minimoose into this chapter for you guys! :3 Also sorry I took so long on this. I'm actually working on… a lot, but mostly just 3 other fics atm. Seriously though, push that 'Follow' button up there! ^ I do have some cool fics in the works, you guys might like them! PWEEEEEASE? Do it for da childwen! The Nightmare Begins5 years after the Most Horrible Xmas Ever… "Operation Impending Doom II is OVER, Zim!" Said Zim's leader, Tallest Red. The Almighty Tallest Leaders of the Irken Empire, Red and Purple, have hated Zim ever since he single-handedly ruined the original Operation Impending Doom. But every attempt they made to kill him had backfired so far, so they let him rot on that nameless planet. Zim still thought he was an Invader, and the Tallest put up with his phone calls every once in a while just to keep him as far away from the Irken Empire as possible. "…But…" protested Invader Zim with a pouty face, being projected on a huge hologram screen before the Almighty Tallest, in an intergalactic video call. "OVER!" Red said, clenching his fist. "Yea! It's been over for a whole Irken year now!" Said Tallest Purple, through a bunch of half-chewed doughnuts stuffed in his cheeks, crumbs spewing from his mouth, and pointing an accusatory finger at the screen. "Can't I be part of Operation Impending Doom III?" Zim begged with his best puppy dog eyes. "There is no Operation Impending Doom III! We already conquered all the galaxies we wanted to!" Said Red. "But we haven't conquered Earth!" "We don't care about Earth…" Purple mumbled. "Goodbye Zim." Red said flatly, then looked over to his subordinate in charge of communications, and made a gesture with a finger moving across his throat. Some Earth-hours later, somewhere in space, near Earth's moon. "THE MOON IS MINE, DIB!" Zim shouted at his human nemesis, a now very teenage Dib. Who, incidentally, was now almost twice as tall as Zim. "NEVER!" Dib retorted, his voice cracking halfway through the word. Dib's spaceship (technically Tak's old spaceship) was taking tons of damage from Zim's Voot Cruiser's laser cannon. Sweat poured from Dib's head as he strained to maneuver his small craft around Zim's fire. "You're doing it wrong," commented Dib's sister, Gaz, who was uncomfortably squished next to her annoying older brother in the single-seat craft. She hated being dragged along on his little 'save the world' missions. Dib didn't answer, concentrating on flying. "C'mon, let me fly, I wanna be home for dinner." After a few seconds more of straining, and a warning message from the ship's computer… "Shields at critical damage." (In Tak's voice.) Dib finally exhaled deeply (almost screaming in defeat) and let go of the joystick. Gaz nonchalantly took control of the vessel and flew directly up, doing a quick loop, and leveling off again directly behind the Voot Cruiser. A little bit of casual button-pressing, and probably a Game Slave cheat code or two later and Zim's craft was crippled. Zim's angry face popped up on a little hologram screen in Dib's ship, he shouted incoherently at his enemies. Dib just stared dumbfounded at the wreck floating in space in front of him. "How do you ALWAYS do that?!" Dib shouted at his sister. "Pfft… noob." Meanwhile, in the Voot Cruiser… A bright flash of blue light appeared in front of Zim, while he was still ranting. "Eh?" Zim said at the flash of light, with a stupid blank expression on his face, his skinny tongue hanging from his open mouth. "Hey look! A wormhole!" Noted Zim's defective little robot minion, GIR. The view of space became contorted and stretched as Zim's craft was sucked into the wormhole. "Warning. Incoming wormhole," warned Zim's ship's computer. "WHAT?! We're already IN the wormhole! Why didn't you warn me sooner?!" "I was busy." The computer cleared his throat. "Assessing… damages…" "I DON'T PAY YOU TO ASSESS DAMAGES WHEN I'M BEING SUCKED INTO A WORMHOLE!" "You… don't pay me at all." "COMPUTER! Find out where this wormhole comes out!" "Maybe it's the one with the moose!" GIR excitedly chimed in, holding a muffin in his hand. "Wormhole ends in same solar system, near Earth," Computer answered. "Eh? That's it? What a stupid wormhole." Back in Dib's ship… "Hey look, Zim's being sucked into a wormhole," Gaz stated flatly, "Good, now that he's gone, I'll never have to miss dinner while we're out on one of your stupid play-dates with him." "THIS IS NOT A PLAY DATE!" Dib defended, "THIS IS THE FATE OF THE ENTIRE WORLD!" "Meh. Let's go home." Gaz tilted the ship's joystick and the ship only rotated around 180 degrees, being sucked backward into the vortex. Gaz turned up the thrusters, and the ship began to pull away, but upon reaching their maximum force, the thrusters cut out, and in that one second that they were off, the spacecraft was swallowed by the wormhole. Dib just sat there, contemplating what just happened. Gaz scrunched up her face in anger and frustration, and clenched her fists. She grabbed Dib's throat with a single hand, and yelled at him as she choked him, "THIS IS YOUR FAULT! NOW WE'RE GOING TO MISS OUR ANNUAL FAMILY DINNER NIGHT WITH DAD!" Gaz proceeded to beat the living crap out of her brother. On the other end of the wormhole… The Voot Cruiser popped out of a hole in space with a brilliant flash of blue light. Zim's crippled ship was limping towards the dark side of the planet he was entrusted to invade, with only one working thruster, that kept cutting out. As the ship entered the atmosphere, the computer spat out warnings about non-functioning systems, incoming planets, terminal velocity, and impending doom. Zim was too busy screaming to listen. So was GIR. But he was munching on a muffin as well. The violently flaming ship neared the ground, and plowed through the trees of a thick forest, creating a path of devastation in its wake, eventually coming to a stop somewhere on the ground in the middle of the dark forest. For a short moment, Zim and GIR had both stopped screaming. Zim wondered how he would get revenge against the filthy human and GIR took the opportunity to finish his muffin, licking his metal fingers with his fleshy pink tongue, and he pondered on when he might eat another of these delicious muffins. Their period of reflection was short lived, however, as it was interrupted by the ship's computer… "Power core critical. Implosion imminent." Judging by the computer's reaction time to certain important things lately, Zim was not overreacting when he opened the ship's battered windshield/door thing, jumped out, and ran for his life… screaming, of course. Zim ran almost blindly through the dense woods in the dead of night, but after sense caught up with him, his backpack opened and he used his big mechanical spider legs to run faster. Then there was the sound of trees and leaves rustling in a powerful wind blowing directly against Zim's face, as the Voot Cruiser sucked air and even a few whole trees into its imploding power core. The wind stopped, but Zim kept running, because he knew that it would… BOOM …explode in a blazingly bright white flash, leaving an enormous mushroom cloud behind as the light died down. Zim was out of the blast radius but was still thrown face-first into a tree trunk. He separated his face from the filthy Earth tree and stood there dazed for a moment. He shook his head and noticed that GIR was nowhere to be seen. And he heard a high pitched noise rapidly approaching him from above. It was GIR, screaming. He fell through the trees and landed face-down on the dirt with a loud THUNK, silencing him. The little robot stayed there for almost a whole minute before he jumped up and shouted, "THAT WAS FUN! I wanna do it again!" "NO GIR, not again!" "Aww…" He said, looking down at his feet in a devastating disappointment. Dib was nowhere to be found. 'Finally, I can carry out my mission in peace,' thought Zim. After a moment of self-congratulation, Zim noticed that this forest wasn't like the woods near the city. And, therefore, this couldn't be the same planet, because, logically, all the forests on any given planet would be the same. "Wait a minute!" he said to no one in particular. That wormhole must have deposited him in some other galaxy or dimension. At least it wasn't the one with the walnut-eating moose. If this wasn't Earth, maybe it was some kind of tropical forest planet? Maybe the Tallest would want to conquer it for the trees… or something. He stood there in deep thought, his little gloved hand stroking his chin. "Eh, oh well. At least the Dib human isn't here." As if on cue, a ball of fire came whistling down from the night sky, and crashed through the trees, falling almost completely straight downward. So close to Zim, in fact, that the air being displaced from the crash threw him backwards into a tree. The spacecraft opened up and two humans rolled out of it, the purple-haired scary female still punching and choking her brother, in an epic battle of vengeance for depriving her of her pizza. "HEY!" Zim called out to the humans in mortal combat. "HEY!" He called again. Neither responded. He looked to GIR, and opened his mouth to give him an order, only to find him contentedly watching the fight, and eating popcorn. Useless robot. Zim walked (goose-stepping) over to the filthy humans' means of transportation, Tak's old ship. Irken technology. Slightly outdated, and heavily modified, but still very much Irken. Unfortunately the not-so-epic space battle and crash landing had not been kind to it. At least the power core didn't implode. But it looked like this ship was out of commission for now. Zim growled in defeat, for his plan to steal the ship and leave the humans to rot on this tropical rainforest planet (that still seemed a lot like Earth) was foiled. "WILL YOU TWO QUIT IT!? WE'RE STRANDED ON AN ALIEN PLANET!" Gaz's punches to Dib's severely swollen face slowed to a halt. She was still holding Dib's limp body by his neck with one hand. She didn't stop for Zim, she heard the rustling of leaves and stopped to listen. She watched, unimpressed, as a giant beast leapt from the darkness and took a swipe at Zim, who rolled over to avoid it, and got back on his feet and began running and screaming and flailing his arms in the air. GIR was still sitting and watching, munching on popcorn, kicking his legs, and giggling in amusement. Gaz dropped her brother on the ground. He groaned and tried to get back on his feet. At least she was nice enough to punch around his glasses. Or maybe she just didn't want her knuckles full of broken glass. Hmm. He stood up, wobbling around with a lack of balance, and tried to figure out what was happening. Zim was being chased in a big circle through the trees, by a beast shaped roughly like a giant lion, but much bigger, with bat wings and a scorpion tail. His screams were abruptly ended with a loud THUD and an "OOF!" when he bumped into something. Dib and Gaz were too far away to see what he bumped into, but they saw a small sparkly flash of light in his direction. The beast roared and ran off. Gaz casually walked over there, and Dib stumbled his way over. Zim shook his head to clear his sight, then looked at what he bumped into. It was a strange black and white striped horse, roughly standing at his height, wearing several gold rings. "Eh?" Zim said. Gaz, Dib, and GIR arrived in the zebra's vision, and she asked, "What manner of creatures are you four? Creatures like these, I have never seen before." An electric sparking noise came from GIR. His face went blank, with his eyes going dark grey, and he fell to a sitting position. Zim quickly equipped his wig and contact lenses. "I'm a human! Yep! Human, human, human!" He said, even though his cover was already blown. "You're not a human! We're humans!" Dib said through his swollen mouth, with a lisp, gesturing to his sister and himself. "You're an ALIEN!" He pointed an accusing finger to the green human imposter. His rivalry with Zim made him completely oblivious to the small talking zebra. "There are no humans here, that much is clear, so that makes you the aliens my dear!" "Are you a… z-zebra?" Dib asked, finally noticing what was talking to him. "Why yes I am…" "A TALKING ZEBRA?!" Dib cut her off, "WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON?!!!" He fell to his knees and begged the answer from the starry night sky, as if the very universe was playing jokes on him. In a way, it was. What with that wormhole and all. "Yes I can speak, but so can you! It is not that hard a thing to do." Despite his momentary lapse into insanity, Dib got back on his feet and shrugged off the weirdness of his current situation, as he had long since learned to do when dealing with Zim and his shenanigans. Zim, however, had no such issues with the talking zebra. His race had conquered many different planets and peoples, so he was no stranger to another variety of sapient creatures. Even if this one looked like a FILTHLY Earth horse. "Do you always talk in rhyme?" Dib asked bluntly. "It is an old tradition of my people to speak in verse, the ponies here used to think I was uttering a curse." "Ponies?" Zim and Dib asked in unison (Zim emphasized the end of the word). Dib heard a strange high pitched squeal come from his right, but when he looked there, he only saw his sister with her usual uncaring expression. "Now if you would all follow me, the night is not safe in the Everfree. In my home we can talk, it is only a short walk." With nothing better to do, and Zim's poorly-hidden fear of that beast chasing after him again, they followed the rhyming zebra. Gaz reluctantly grabbed GIR's limp form by the arm and dragged him along with her, his face plowing up the dirt along the way. After a short walk they arrived at a large tree-hut, glowing yellow with lamp light in the darkness of the forest. The zebra opened the wooden door to the hut and walked in. "Fluttershy, my dear, what are you doing here?" She said to a shivering butter yellow ball in the middle of the floor. "Oh, thank goodness it's you Zecora." Her shaking slowed and she sat up. "I… I heard an explosion in the forest and I came to see if you were alright – even though I was scared – b-but you weren't here… so I waited and, and… oh my, what kind of animals are those?" She asked about the strange creatures shadowing Zecora on her way into her home. "I do not know, Fluttershy, but I believe they fell from the sky." "We're humans," Dib said with a lisp, "He's an Irken." "I'm a human too!" Zim corrected with a positive smile in the direction of the yellow thing. "Oh my… you can talk…" Fluttershy said. "Yea, and so can you. Big deal." Dib pointed out. Zecora gave him a dirty look. "I've never heard of a 'humin' before, what are your names?" Fluttershy asked very quietly. "You know, if, um… you don't mind me asking…" Dib was about to answer but Gaz shoved him out of the way and answered for him, "I'm Gaz, this is my idiot brother Dib, and his pathetic alien friend Zim," she said in her usual flat, uncaring tone. "HEY!" Zim responded with an angry scowl and outstretched arms, getting no response back from the girl. "Oh my… well um… I'm Fluttershy." "Zecora is how you can call me. And Dib has broken a tooth, I see." She said, stepping closer to Dib. "I have just the thing to fix that crack, give me a moment, I will be right back." With that, she walked through a bead curtain to another room. Dib ran his tongue over his front teeth and felt a jagged break in one of them. He gave his sister a dirty look and a little grumble, to which she gave him a devilish smirk in return. "So um… where did you come from…?" Fluttershy asked. Zim pretended to be uninterested with Fluttershy's question. But even Dib could see that this whole thing had Zim scared. And Dib was too, but maybe to a lesser extent, or at least, it hadn't completely hit him yet. 'Things will make sense eventually,' Dib told himself. The unknowns were what got both of them. They didn't know if that wormhole had deposited them in another dimension or on the other side of the universe. Neither possibility sounded too good. And both of them wanted to get back to their precious Earth. (Even if it was precious to them for different reasons.) Lost in thought, Dib was interrupted before he could answer. "Here, take this potion and drink, your tooth will heal quicker than you can think!" Dib grabbed a small bowl from the zebra's mouth – wait, how was she talking and holding the bowl? – and he glanced around the room at everyone else. No one was displaying any reason not to drink the mysterious potentially poisonous liquid given to him by a possibly alien tiny talking zebra. Dib shrugged and gave a "Meh," and gulped it down. A moment later, he felt his teeth shift around, and finally settle back in their original places. He ran his tongue over his teeth, "Hey! It worked! Thanks!" His lisp was now gone! "You are quite welcome, my dear. Now the answer to Fluttershy's question, I would like to hear." "Well, um," Dib looked up and tapped his chin with a finger. Fluttershy interrupted, "What's that?" pointing a hoof at a still-limp GIR. "Oh, er, him? He's um… my dog! Yes! My perfectly normal human Earth-dog." Zim stated with a content grin, even though GIR was completely undisguised. "He looks more like a… robot." "He is…" Dib added. "No he's not!" Zim retorted. "Is he supposed to be… um… broken…?" Fluttershy asked. "SILENCE! Your FILTHY horse brain couldn't even BEGIN to comprehend the complex workings of Irken technologeeeEEEE!" Zim yelled. "Oh… um… I'm sorry," Fluttershy said under her breath, avoiding eye contact by hiding behind her flowing pink hair. Zim was about to continue but couldn't because he was socked in the jaw by Gaz's fist, and knocked clean off his feet. Zim jumped up, "GRRRRRR!... WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!" He was met by a slightly angrier-than-usual Gaz's signature squinty-eyed blank expression, as Gaz grabbed Zim's collar and pointed a finger in his face. "I don't like you." She said flatly. Zecora walked closer to them and said, "Some serious anger issues you all do hide, if you are going to fight, please take it outside." She pointed a hoof to the door. The door responded by knocking loudly three times. Zecora walked over and opened it. Outside, and beginning to walk in, at Zecora's welcoming gesture, were five small colorful equines. The first one, who must have knocked, was a lavender colored one with purple hair. She appeared to have a unicorn's horn. "I'm sorry to bother you so late, Zecora, but we came to check out that explosion... we… heard…" The purple one trailed off after catching sight of the humans plus Irken human impersonator. Sparks could be heard coming from the little robot, and suddenly his eyes lit up green again. "I… I… I…" GIR repeated mechanically for a moment before Zim smacked the side of his head, making a hollow metal thunk. GIR paused for a moment, then continued… "I love this show…" Author's Note Hey guys! If you liked this, please 'follow' me and check out my other fics! Feedback is appreciated! Don't forget to give me a thumb, right down there VVVV
He Comes With a Doggie Costume!Author's Note: Hey guys! This chapter kinda has a lot of dialog and exposition, hopefully it's not too boring. Enjoy! The hut in the middle of a forest populated by mythical beasts was now filled with six very colorful alien ponies, one blinged-out rhyming zebra, a little green alien invader, his defective robot minion, two humans (one of them scary in her own right), and a very heavy awkward silence. It was safe to say things were getting a bit weird. And then there was that sound again. Dib looked in the direction of his sister, the only possible source, and yet found nothing out of the ordinary with her. Squinty eyes? Check. Stoic expression? Check. Scary presence? Check. Maybe her cell phone made the squealing sound? Could she possibly have a signal wherever she was? Maybe it was a low battery sound? Dib cast aside these thoughts and faced the new creatures that had entered the hut. These were probably the 'ponies' Zecora spoke of. "HI TWILIGHT!" GIR shouted at the purple unicorn in front of him. He stood there smiling with his tongue sticking out, waving his little hand very fast. The pony GIR had named Twilight recoiled back, in what looked like disgust at the little metal guy, holding a forehoof off the ground, as if shielding herself from it. Fluttershy spoke up, albeit very softly, "Um… Twilight, these um… creatures… are called 'humins.' " "Yes, Twilight my dear, now listen here. I was resting when a great wind hit my humble abode, I looked out my window and saw something explode! Outside I went to check the sound, but instead these four I found," Zecora added with a gentle smile in the direction of the newcomers. All the other ponies behind Twilight just stood still in various degrees of shock, awe, and confusion. "Um… is that a robot? And how'd he know my name?!" The purple unicorn asked, cautiously flicking her raised hoof in the direction of the freaky metal thing, still very confused by all this. "Ah, yes… he's my uh… *mumble* Information Retrieval unit! Yes! It is his job to gather such informaSHUNNNN!" Zim informed her, pointing a finger up in the air. "How DID he know that?" Zim mumbled under his breath, wondering if the little guy might have somehow actually started working right for a change. "I thought… he was a dog…" Fluttershy pointed out. "SILENCE!" Zim snapped at Fluttershy. He glanced over to Gaz and decided not to say any more. Twilight finally noticed her yellow friend off in a corner, "Oh, hi Fluttershy, no wonder you weren't home. What are you doing here?" "Oh, um, I heard the explosion too… I came to see if Zecora was OK, but she wasn't here. But then she came back, and these humins were following her. They're um…" Fluttershy looked to Zim for a moment, "…nice." "Oh… well then…" Twilight turned back to the strange new creatures. GIR was still smiling and waving at her. Wearing an uneasy smile, she managed to say, "Um… hello. My name is Twilight Sparkle. You've already met Zecora and Fluttershy, these are the rest of my friends." She moved aside to let them commence introductions. A pink one took Twilight's gesture as the green light to introduce herself. "HI! My name's Pinkie Pie! Are you aliens?! OOOOH! Aren't you the cutest little robot I've ever seen! *Giggle-snort* You're the first little robot I've ever seen! But still!" She picked GIR up in her forehooves. "WEEEE! HI PINKIE!" GIR shouted, and continued smiling and waving really fast. "So what're your names?!" Pinkie asked, putting GIR down. Both Dib and Zim looked to Gaz, who rushed to be the one to do the introductions last time, but she was just standing there, strangely still and silent, making no move to begin. 'Why is she so quiet?' Dib thought. "I'm Dib, this is my sister Gaz, and…" "I AM ZIMMMMMM!!!" Zim loudly proclaimed with one hand proudly upon his chest, and the other pointing a finger in the air. Pinkie Pie giggled at their names. "You have funny names! I like them! What's your name little guy?" GIR's eyes turned red and his expression became serious as he saluted Pinkie Pie. "GIR reporting for duty." After a brief pause, his eyes turned green again. "Hehehehehe! I said 'dooty,' " GIR said, giggling some more. Pinkie giggled with him. A white unicorn stepped forward. "Ahem…" she said, trying to speak over the laughter, "my name is Rarity. It is… a pleasure… to meet your… acquaintance," she said nervously, ending with a weak, awkward smile. An orange pony wearing a hat stepped up next. She tipped her hat at them. "Howdy! Ahm Applejack! Pleasure ta meet y'all!" Finally, a visibly very tired light blue one with wild rainbow hair trotted wearily forward from behind her friends. "Sup. I'm Rainbow Dash," she said from behind tired eyes. "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Zim inhaled, "AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" He finished, bent over from laughing so hard, still chuckling in between breaths. "Hey! What's so funny green guy?!" Rainbow dash said with irritation behind those tired eyes. She walked over to him, almost losing her balance for a second on the way over. "You're…! You're rainbow colored…!" Zim panted to catch his breath, "and…! and you're name is…!" He finally looked up to see that the filthy rainbow horse thing was an inch away from his face, "Rainbow…" "Yea? Laugh at my name again. I dare you," she dared, pressing her muzzle against his… face. Zim just gulped. He thought she might almost be as scary as Gaz, if it weren't for her ridiculous hair color. Zecora gave them both an annoyed look, and was just about to tell them to take it outside again. "That's what I thought." Rainbow turned, flicking her tail in Zim's face, and walked back towards the two real humans, who had not yet offended her. "Wow. You look really tired," Dib said as he pointed at her. "Yea, they woke me up," she answered unenthusiastically. "Hey, are those wings?" Dib pointed to Rainbow's side. She nodded, "Yea… I'm a pegasus, doy," saying it as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Wow! So you can fly?!" Rainbow perked up a little at this chance to boast. "Buck yea I can fly!" She said as she unfurled her wings and gave them a few flaps. "I'm the fastest flier in all of Equestria!" She floated a few inches off the floor and proudly held a hoof to her chest. "Eh? Uh-quest-tree-uhHHHH…? Is that the name of this WRETCHED horse planet?" Asked Zim. Twilight answered, "Um, no, it's the name of our nation. The planet we call Earth." Zim and Dib looked at each other, then back to Twilight. "Are you saying you're not from this planet?" She asked with a large helping of disbelief in her voice and a raised eyebrow. "Well, uh," Dib gestured to his sister and himself, "we're from Earth…" He paused, not knowing how to explain the fact that they were all indeed aliens. Dib had a really hard time wrapping his head around the idea that HE was the invader now, sort of. "But it's a different Earth," Gaz finally said. Her brother was beginning to wonder if she had fallen asleep on her feet. It was hard to tell with her squinty eyes. Why was she being so quiet anyway? This seemed to be going a little beyond her normal 'I don't care about anything' attitude towards everything in general. "Um… I don't suppose you…" Twilight was interrupted by loud obnoxious giggling from Pinkie and GIR. "…know what that explosion was?" "Oh that! That was just my um…" Zim started. "Zim's ship exploded," Gaz finished. "LIES!" Zim shouted. A brief pause because of his outburst... "How did you know?" Zim demanded. "I saw it before we landed. Duh." "You mean 'crashed'?" Zim quipped with a sarcastic grin. "At least our ship didn't explode." "Just like dis: KA-BOOM!!!" GIR shouted out of nowhere. "Wait a minute, hold on," Twilight interrupted, "What kind of ships are we talking about here?" "Spaceships?" Dib offered. "Really?" Twilight asked with curious look. She received a few slight nods from Dib, Gaz, and Zim. "I told you that was an alien spaceship landing!" Pinkie pointed a hoof towards Twilight. "She did say that once or twice…" Applejack added. "So that means that you're… that this…" There was then a visible gleam in Twilight's dilated pupils, as she clapped her forehooves together once in realization. "This is first contact! How wonderful!" "So y'all really are aliens? How the hay are ya speakin' Equestrian?" Applejack asked, trying, almost instinctively, to determine the truth. Dib raised an index finger and inhaled to begin the explanation. But instead of words coming out of his mouth, there were only questions coming into his head. His finger fell limp. Disregarding the language's name of 'Equestrian,' verbal communication with these creatures was, so far, completely seamless. For that matter, thought Dib, how had Zim been able to speak English so well? It went even further than that: over the years, Dib had managed to talk with Zim's leaders a couple of times. And although they paid no attention to him and his empty threats, they could at least understand what he was saying, and vice versa. He looked to Zim, who understood the question, and only responded by shaking his head 'no' with a blank face, a big shrug, and an open-mouthed mumble that roughly sounded like 'I don't know.' "Hey guys! Look! He comes with a doggie costume!" Pinkie held up GIR dressed in his dog suit. "MeeeoooOWWWW!" GIR said, waving his nubby little arms. This prompted snickers and giggles from the ponies, zebra, and even a little bit from Gaz. Except for the more refined Rarity, who simply asked, "Is that a… zipper?" She was probably the only equine in the room who would recognize a zipper when she saw one. "Eh?" Zim glanced over to his robot minion. "That's a… collar! You know, like a dog… collar… tag… Yes! Dogs have collars, right?" "Oh give it up Zim! That dog costume is terrible! And so is your pitiful disguise!" Dib shouted at his nemesis. "What are you talking about?" Zim casually said, trying to act oblivious. Of course, he now had the full attention of everyone in the hut. Even GIR and Pinkie. "He's an ALIEN!" Dib pointed an accusing finger at Zim. "Well, you know, like a real alien! Like… um… you know? Not-a-human alien!" "LIES! LIES! THE FEELTHY EARTH BOY LIESSSS!" Zim grew nervous, and started sweating. He looked at all the stinking creatures looking at him accusingly. Dib and Gaz had seen him undisguised plenty of times, but Dib was crazy and no one listened to him. Gaz just didn't care. And on the few rare occasions his cover had been blown to anyone else, he usually managed to talk his way out of it, the stupid Earth humans were pretty gullible, after all. But now he had a whole room full of people staring at him. Thoughts of being dissected by human scientists began to flood his mind. "I'm a human! Yep! Human, human, human! Perfectly normal human!" He tugged on his collar nervously, smiling uneasily. "I'M NORMAL!" "Zim! You MORON! They're not humans! We're not even on the same planet anymore!" Dib shouted at Zim. As much as he hated to admit it, his large-headed human nemesis was right. Zim had been undercover for so long that his human guise had become a second skin to him. In fact, it had gotten to the point where the only reason he would take off the wig and contact lenses was because they were uncomfortable. Otherwise, he might have left them on all day long, even in the privacy of his home -slash- secret base. He wondered for a moment if he would be nervous like this even around his fellow Irkens, being undisguised. And for how long? Would he always be uncomfortable out of disguise? Was he mentally scarred for life? Doomed to feel more comfortable in the form of one of the filthy stupid inhabitants of the very planet he was trying to conquer for the good of his true race? "Earth to Zim," Gaz stated flatly, snapping her fingers. "Eh?" Zim snapped out of his daze. "Do it already," She egged him on to remove his disguise. Zim understood and reluctantly placed one hand on the bouffant front part of his wig, and slowly lifted it off his head. All the ponies (but not Zecora who had seen him already), and even GIR, gasped at his revealed antennae. Using both hands, one for each eye, he then pinched his contact lenses off of his huge Irken eyeballs, revealing their true pupil-less solid pink appearance, which earned another gasp from most of the onlookers, and a curious "Ooooh…" from the pink one. Zim cringed as he looked back up at all the things staring at him. While the other two looked like shaved apes with clothes and funny mane-styles, Zim's appearance was more akin to the ponies' general idea of what an actual space alien might look like, which prompted this long awkward silence. "So… if you're not a… human… then what are you?" Twilight inquired. "I'm Irken," he begrudgingly replied, even though he should have been proud of his answer. Zim put his wig and contacts back on. "Have you been hiding so long your true form, that it no longer feels like the norm?" Zecora asked with a concerned face, trying to offer moral support by walking closer to the little green guy. It was as if the zebra beast had read his mind. "Of course not! I just don't like them staring at me!" Zim lied as he pointed a shaky finger at the ponies. There was another moment of silence as the ponies all exchanged glances at each other. "Can we go home now? I'm tired of all this talking," Rainbow complained. "Well, um… I don't know. Applejack? Do you think these… new friends of ours could sleep in your barn?" Twilight asked the farm pony. "I- I s'pose so…" She answered. "They could stay at my house!" Fluttershy butt in. "I mean um… if that's ok…" On the walk through the dark, creepy forest… "I wonder if dad's noticed we're gone…" Dib mused aloud. "Meh," Gaz returned. "What?" Was all Dib could say to her answer after having been nearly beaten to death by her for making her miss dinner night with dad. Was all that only for the pizza…? Dib was pretty sure it was also for missing rare quality time with their father… Meanwhile, on a different Earth… Tap, tap, tap, tap A black rubber boot impatiently tapped on the floor. "Gaz, come in Gaz." "Dib, come in Dib." "Hmm… it's been THREE hours now, and still no sign of my children," Professor Membrane said to the walls of his empty house with a clenched fist. "It's not like Gaz to miss our annual family dinner night! Maybe Dib, but not Gaz!" He tried looking at the computer screen displaying a map that would show where in the world his children's wrist watches-slash-video communicators were at the moment, but alas, the locations of either could still not be found. "Well, if their locations can't be found, that leaves only three possible options! ONE! Both of their communicators are in a Faraday cage that's blocking the GPS signals. TWO! Both of them were completely and utterly DESTROYED by a nuclear explosion, the only possible thing that could damage the locators in those communicators! Or THREE! They are no longer on the planet…" The professor stroked his chin with his black rubber-gloved hand through the very tall collar on his lab coat that covered even his nose. Professor Membrane had long since grown used to his son's INSANE talk about aliens and spaceships. But now he wondered. "My poor, insane son…" "Professor!" A voice called from seemingly nowhere. Membrane's goggles lit up and inside he could see a video call from one of his subordinates. "Are you done with…" the scientist held up a paper, "the 'annual family dinner night' yet? You have a meeting with the Secretary of Defense in half an hour!" "I won't be able to make it." "What?! Sir, you can't just blow him off, he's had this appointment for over a year!" "Well, tell him we'll have to reschedule," And with that, the pulled the wire to his goggles, unplugging them and abruptly ending the call. As much help as his squadron of assistants could offer in finding his children, he knew how they could get when he tried to avoid his appointments. Besides, this was something he had to do himself. Back to his previous train of thought, he recalled Dib mentioning a spaceship he was working on in the garage. And although Professor Membrane knew his son had his father's intelligence, he still expected nothing more than a garbage can with fireworks tied to it, or some other juvenile attempt. Opening the door to the garage, he flicked on the light switch and looked around. "No wonder I don't park in here anymore." Author's Note In case you don't think the pony planet is called 'Earth,' please see the Hearth's Warming Eve episode, wherein Pinkie Pie, as Chancellor Puddinghead (therefore she theoretically had rehearsed lines), says, "The Earth is round, there is no up or down." Sorry no Minimoose yet, I have plans for him though! Also, please comment! I read all of them, honest! Let me know what you guys think so far. And if you haven't already, please 'follow' me! I promise I won't spam your notifications with a bunch of worthless blog posts. I just have some interesting fics in the works, and you might like them!
The Wrong Side of the Bed...Zim stared blankly at the rustic wood ceiling through the darkness. All the other less intelligent beings in the room were already fast asleep. And so were the little vermin. The Dib human occupied another space on the floor, comfortably out of smelling range from Zim. The scary human female had claimed the couch. The yellow pony beast that owned this filthy vermin-ridden residence was upstairs in her bedroom. And thankfully the little fur monsters gave Zim a very wide berth, they practically scattered as he entered the place, except for that little white one with big ears. That one stood his ground. Zim rolled over to his side (laying on his pak was less than comfortable). The blankets strewn on the wood floor that he lay on were actually fairly cozy. Zim contemplated what he should do next. It had been many Earth years since Zim had partaken in this 'sleep.' Irken biology (with the help of their paks) did not require it. He had always thought it to be a waste of precious time. But right now, laying there in the silent darkness with nothing better to do, he decided to try it. Zim woke slowly to the sound of clanging metal. As he came too, drooling on his pillow, he realized he had no idea where he was. So naturally, the first thing that came to mind was, "AHHHHH!!!! I'VE BEEN CAPTURED!!!" He screamed as he jumped up and starting running in a circle. Dib couldn't help himself, after his third or fourth time around, Dib stuck his leg out in Zim's path. Zim tripped and faceplanted on the floor, sliding forward a few feet, his face stirring up some dust from the hardwood floor. He removed his face from the floor, shook his head to make his eyes point the right way again, and looked up. "Whaaaa?" Fluttershy and Gaz stared at him, from next to the home's stone hearth, Gaz was snickering a bit from that epic faceplant, and she was holding a cooking pot of some kind. Fluttershy actually displayed a look of concern for the poor hurt alien. The Dib human was standing behind him a few feet, whistling, with his hands behind his back. And even that furry white vermin stood on the floor in the middle of the room, staring him down, with his tiny arms crossed. Zim got up and chuckled in nervous embarrassment, and goose-stepped over to the couch and sat down. Dib joined him, with an adequate amount of personal space between the two, of course. "You didn't see that," Zim said, pointing at Dib. "Yes I did…" Dib retorted. "SILENCE!" Zim barked. "Man, Zim, looks like you woke up on the wrong side of the bed!" "Eh? I wasn't even on a bed!" "It's a figure of sp… oh, never mind." Desperate to change the subject, Zim asked, "What are THEY doing?" "Making breakfast, I think." "Brek-FESSSST?! I don't suppose they're making… wafflessss…?" "I dunno." "Hmm…" Zim got up and walked to the breakfast makers. "YOU! Scary human child and filthy wing-ed horse beast!" He received a blank stare from Gaz but Fluttershy just looked away. "Are you making waffleSSS for brek-fest???" Zim inquired with wide eyes and a look of anticipation. Fluttershy squeaked out an "Um…" And Gaz answered, "Oatmeal and eggs." Zim responded with a disappointed grunt, and hung his head low as he meandered back to sit on the couch. He had grown quite fond of these human 'waffles' over the years. It was one of the few Earth foods that did not make him wretch, but after he got used to them, he actually started liking them. "Your… sibling… she seems to be quite friendly with the horse beast," Zim noted. Dib took notice of his sister, over by the fireplace, cooking breakfast with the yellow pegasus. "Yea, she…" He trailed off as he noticed something very, very wrong with his beloved sister. She was smiling. Not an evil smile, a diabolical grin, or even a smartass sarcastic smirk. But a real, albeit small, quite genuine smile. Dib was rendered speechless. Gaz was never the cheery type, quite the opposite, actually. To see her smile was… frightening. Even more so than her usual scary demeanor and very real threats of bodily harm. Zim waved his little hand in front of Dib's face. It did not faze him. "HEY! HELLO?!" Zim shouted at his dazed enemy. Dib shook his head and looked at Zim. "Wha?" "Where's GIR?!" Zim demanded. The human boy looked around the room briefly and shrugged. "HEY! WHERE'S MY DOG?!" Zim shouted over to the cooks. "Who cares?" Gaz casually responded. "Um… I think he went outside, um… a while ago…" Fluttershy answered. "Eh?" Zim ran to the front door in a panic, knowing full well what that little robot was capable of when left alone. He swung the door open, got a glimpse of what was outside, and then slammed it shut. He grit his teeth and leaned his back against the door, as if bracing it. RRRRROOOOOOOAAAARRRRR A ferocious lion's roar was heard by all inside the cottage. Most of the small critters scurried back to their hiding places. A moment later, the door opened, with Zim still attached to it. GIR (in his dog suit) merrily strolled inside, turned back and yelled out the door, "BYE MISTER MANTICORE! I'll seeya later!" He waved his little hand briefly and closed the door, taking Zim with it. Zim stepped away from the door, "GIR! What are you doing?! That beast tried to eat me last night!!!" "I dunno, he seems nice!" GIR innocently responded. Even Fluttershy seemed put off by what was implied. After breakfast, Zim didn't touch his (GIR happily ate it for him), there was a knock at the door. Fluttershy answered it, and two ponies, who had previously introduced themselves as Twilight Sparkle and Pinkie Pie, cantered into the cottage. Well, the pink one more 'bounced' than 'cantered.' Greetings were said by all but Zim. Twilight then announced the reason she was present, "Well, we came to the conclusion that you all should come to town and we'll introduce you to everypony..." "Uh… Twilight… do you think that's a good idea? We might kinda… freak out the natives…" Dib suggested. "Especially Zim," he deadpanned as he pointed a thumb behind him to the little invader. "Don't be silly!" Pinkie gleefully answered. "I thought about that. That's why Pinkie here is going around town inviting everypony to the…" "PARTY!!!" Pinkie jumped in front of Twilight and finished her sentence. Twilight nudged her friend out of her view. "…And she'll be explaining to them the nature of your… nature." "This is SO exciting! I've never been so excited! I've never thrown a party for ALIENS before! This is going to be super-duper-FUN!" Pinkie bounced around the room. "That sounds um… nice," Fluttershy commented with a small smile. Dib noticed that Gaz was smiling again. Perhaps even more than last time. Since when did she like parties? Especially parties thrown by alien equines? "Well we just dropped by to tell, er, invite you," Twilight started, "I'm afraid you'll all have to wait here until sundown, then we'll walk you into town for the welcoming party." She ended with a smile. 'These ponies sure are nice. They're throwing a welcoming party for aliens…' Dib thought to himself. If aliens were ever found on his own world, they'd probably be captured and dissected. He would know, he planned to do that to Zim when he first discovered him. Then again, at the time, he knew Zim's race was planning on multiple hostile planetary takeovers. Of course, over time, he discovered that the Irken Empire had no interest in his Earth, but he still had to protect it from Zim. 'These FILTHY horse beasts are actually quite hosPITable. I wish the Earth humans would have thrown ME a party when I got there.' Zim thought to himself. He knew from factual human media, such as movies, that aliens were hated on Earth. He would surely be dissected if he were ever found out and captured. His human nemesis had intended to do it himself when they first met. Despite the threat of capture, he had to stick to his mission. He had to take over his Earth. He did not want to disappoint his Tallest Leaders, who had entrusted him with this highly secret mission on the mystery planet. Pinkie stopped bouncing. "Oh yea! The party! I have to get started inviting everypony! I don't have much time! I'm inviting the whole town!" She made for the door. "PINKIE! Can I come with you?" GIR gave Pinkie his best set of puppy dog eyes. Not terribly difficult considering he was in a dog suit. "Aww… of course you can come with me, GIR!" Pinkie smiled at him. GIR jumped up on Pinkie's back. "YAAAAAAAYYYYY!!!" He clapped his nubby hands together in excitement. The pink mare walked out the door and bounced on her way, humming a merry tune, with GIR riding on her back. Twilight watched as her bouncy pink friend and the alien's mischievous robot-slash-pet dog faded into the distance, headed towards town. She wondered what kind of trouble those two would get into… Later… An air raid siren wails in the distance. The sun is darkened by a blanket of grey smoke, being continually replenished by the many house fires throughout the town. Thatched roofs are quite flammable, apparently. The townsponies run wild in the streets, in a full on panic. 'Help!' 'Save me!' 'The horror!' These are the cries heard amongst the sounds of raging fires, screams, and galloping hooves. In the town square, a lone light-purple unicorn filly with a blonde mane sits crying. She looks up and sniffles, "Where's mommy?" An explosion is heard in the distance. Twilight shook her head to clear these thoughts. A little smirk played its way across her face. "Nah, that'd never happen," she said to herself. Meanwhile, on a different Earth… Professor Membrane was looking at all the clutter in his garage. Tools and parts were strewn everywhere. Several large bundles of wires connected to computers on one end, were all hanging loose at the other end. All these wires' loose ends lay in a circular pattern on the floor. Something was there, something that all that stuff was hooked up to. And it wasn't there anymore. Still, though, the amount of work and technology going into whatever was there was way more than what Membrane expected. This was truly on par with even his own personal projects. He looked around. Nothing there was out of the ordinary. Screwdrivers, wrenches, hammers, band saw, belt sander, weed whacker, electrical components… what was this? Professor Membrane picked up a pink cylindrical item. About the size and shape of an energy drink can, it had a few wires coming from the top. And some… foreign… writing on the side, with what appeared to be a manufacturer's logo. A black triangle with a circle in the middle. He pocketed the device in his lab coat and left the garage, flicking the light switch off on his way out. He walked back to his computer and sat in front of it. With elbows on the desk, he meshed his gloved fingers and rested his chin upon them, his lab coat's collar still somehow managing to hide his nose in this position. "Computer, play last transmission from Gaz's communicator." The screen displayed some white noise, then a view of a very irritated Gaz. She turned her squinty eyes to the screen, and addressed her audience. "Hi dad. We should be home by seven." She was interrupted by a loud maniacal laughter. After it, the same voice said something incomprehensible. "Pause," ordered Membrane, "Replay last three seconds." Membrane could barely make out a few words, namely: moon, tidal waves, his son's name, and doom. While contemplating what those words implied, the professor noticed a black smudge in the picture, just above his son's hair. "Zoom in. Enhance. Zoom in. Enhance. Enhance." There it was again, the triangle logo, on a wall (or something) behind his son. He pulled the pink device from his lab coat's pocket to double check. "Resume play." Gaz looked back at the screen. "Sorry dad, Dib's friend Zim is being annoying. Gotta go." And that was it, the last thing he heard from them. 'Zim' was familiar. Indeed Membrane had even met his deranged son's very normal green foreign friend. Membrane ruminated on his last thought for a moment. Particularly the part about Zim being green and foreign. 'No.' Membrane thought to himself. He refused to believe that his son's friend was an alien. That notion was just ridiculous. He knew Dib wanted to be a 'paranormal investigator,' but he figured that he'd give in and turn to REAL science eventually. Not wanting to think about this any longer, he decided to go investigate his son's room. Once inside, he looked around. The place was a mess. Not the usual teenage boy's messy room, but something more akin to what the Professor's room looked like when he was his son's age. He smiled behind that high collar of his. 'Chip off the old block' he thought. Papers and books were scattered everywhere. A massive corkboard along the wall above the desk held papers with diagrams, schematics, and equations. The desk itself had several computer monitors. Two of which were displaying camera feeds. All but one camera feed were displaying some kind of factory or laboratory. The one that wasn't was showing the outside of a house. A house with freakishly large lawn gnomes. He wondered if this was Zim's house. He figured it was as good a place as any to start looking for his children. The last thing Gaz said was that Zim was 'being annoying,' so they must have been with him. Membrane shifted some papers around on the desk, hoping to find a clue where Zim's house might be. He looked around some more before he gave up. Sighing, he scratched his chin. As he turned to leave, he spotted a huge map on the corkboard. 'How did I miss that?' The map was of a few residential streets, with a cul-de-sac right in the middle, and a red circle around a property. He un-tacked the map from the corkboard and took it with him. He left his house, got in his car, and drove to the address. Parking in front of the strange house, Membrane got out of his car and approached the residence. This was the place with the freakishly large lawn gnomes. There were also a pink lawn flamingo, a blow fish, and a sign that read 'I <3 EARTH.' He approached the door and couldn't shake the feeling that the gnomes were watching him. 'Men' the sign on the door read. Now very intrigued by the owner's taste in decoration, he pressed the doorbell button. Almost immediately, the door opened to reveal two robots. "Welcome home, son!" They said in unison. The robots looked like cliché parents, almost caricatures. Membrane easily saw right through the guise, but still went on to talk to them as though they were real people. Perhaps they were built for the precise purpose of answering the door. "Excuse me, is 'Zim' home?" He asked. Receiving only a blank stare from the slightly sparky robot pair, he was about to decide what to do next when all of a sudden, a small purple blob with moose antlers floated up from behind the door answerers. "MEEP!" The blob squeaked. Author's Note Professor Membrane's part became twice as long as I originally intended, because I wanted to squeeze Minimoose into this chapter for you guys! :3 Also sorry I took so long on this. I'm actually working on… a lot, but mostly just 3 other fics atm. Seriously though, push that 'Follow' button up there! ^ I do have some cool fics in the works, you guys might like them! PWEEEEEASE? Do it for da childwen!
The Nightmare Begins5 years after the Most Horrible Xmas Ever… "Operation Impending Doom II is OVER, Zim!" Said Zim's leader, Tallest Red. The Almighty Tallest Leaders of the Irken Empire, Red and Purple, have hated Zim ever since he single-handedly ruined the original Operation Impending Doom. But every attempt they made to kill him had backfired so far, so they let him rot on that nameless planet. Zim still thought he was an Invader, and the Tallest put up with his phone calls every once in a while just to keep him as far away from the Irken Empire as possible. "…But…" protested Invader Zim with a pouty face, being projected on a huge hologram screen before the Almighty Tallest, in an intergalactic video call. "OVER!" Red said, clenching his fist. "Yea! It's been over for a whole Irken year now!" Said Tallest Purple, through a bunch of half-chewed doughnuts stuffed in his cheeks, crumbs spewing from his mouth, and pointing an accusatory finger at the screen. "Can't I be part of Operation Impending Doom III?" Zim begged with his best puppy dog eyes. "There is no Operation Impending Doom III! We already conquered all the galaxies we wanted to!" Said Red. "But we haven't conquered Earth!" "We don't care about Earth…" Purple mumbled. "Goodbye Zim." Red said flatly, then looked over to his subordinate in charge of communications, and made a gesture with a finger moving across his throat. Some Earth-hours later, somewhere in space, near Earth's moon. "THE MOON IS MINE, DIB!" Zim shouted at his human nemesis, a now very teenage Dib. Who, incidentally, was now almost twice as tall as Zim. "NEVER!" Dib retorted, his voice cracking halfway through the word. Dib's spaceship (technically Tak's old spaceship) was taking tons of damage from Zim's Voot Cruiser's laser cannon. Sweat poured from Dib's head as he strained to maneuver his small craft around Zim's fire. "You're doing it wrong," commented Dib's sister, Gaz, who was uncomfortably squished next to her annoying older brother in the single-seat craft. She hated being dragged along on his little 'save the world' missions. Dib didn't answer, concentrating on flying. "C'mon, let me fly, I wanna be home for dinner." After a few seconds more of straining, and a warning message from the ship's computer… "Shields at critical damage." (In Tak's voice.) Dib finally exhaled deeply (almost screaming in defeat) and let go of the joystick. Gaz nonchalantly took control of the vessel and flew directly up, doing a quick loop, and leveling off again directly behind the Voot Cruiser. A little bit of casual button-pressing, and probably a Game Slave cheat code or two later and Zim's craft was crippled. Zim's angry face popped up on a little hologram screen in Dib's ship, he shouted incoherently at his enemies. Dib just stared dumbfounded at the wreck floating in space in front of him. "How do you ALWAYS do that?!" Dib shouted at his sister. "Pfft… noob." Meanwhile, in the Voot Cruiser… A bright flash of blue light appeared in front of Zim, while he was still ranting. "Eh?" Zim said at the flash of light, with a stupid blank expression on his face, his skinny tongue hanging from his open mouth. "Hey look! A wormhole!" Noted Zim's defective little robot minion, GIR. The view of space became contorted and stretched as Zim's craft was sucked into the wormhole. "Warning. Incoming wormhole," warned Zim's ship's computer. "WHAT?! We're already IN the wormhole! Why didn't you warn me sooner?!" "I was busy." The computer cleared his throat. "Assessing… damages…" "I DON'T PAY YOU TO ASSESS DAMAGES WHEN I'M BEING SUCKED INTO A WORMHOLE!" "You… don't pay me at all." "COMPUTER! Find out where this wormhole comes out!" "Maybe it's the one with the moose!" GIR excitedly chimed in, holding a muffin in his hand. "Wormhole ends in same solar system, near Earth," Computer answered. "Eh? That's it? What a stupid wormhole." Back in Dib's ship… "Hey look, Zim's being sucked into a wormhole," Gaz stated flatly, "Good, now that he's gone, I'll never have to miss dinner while we're out on one of your stupid play-dates with him." "THIS IS NOT A PLAY DATE!" Dib defended, "THIS IS THE FATE OF THE ENTIRE WORLD!" "Meh. Let's go home." Gaz tilted the ship's joystick and the ship only rotated around 180 degrees, being sucked backward into the vortex. Gaz turned up the thrusters, and the ship began to pull away, but upon reaching their maximum force, the thrusters cut out, and in that one second that they were off, the spacecraft was swallowed by the wormhole. Dib just sat there, contemplating what just happened. Gaz scrunched up her face in anger and frustration, and clenched her fists. She grabbed Dib's throat with a single hand, and yelled at him as she choked him, "THIS IS YOUR FAULT! NOW WE'RE GOING TO MISS OUR ANNUAL FAMILY DINNER NIGHT WITH DAD!" Gaz proceeded to beat the living crap out of her brother. On the other end of the wormhole… The Voot Cruiser popped out of a hole in space with a brilliant flash of blue light. Zim's crippled ship was limping towards the dark side of the planet he was entrusted to invade, with only one working thruster, that kept cutting out. As the ship entered the atmosphere, the computer spat out warnings about non-functioning systems, incoming planets, terminal velocity, and impending doom. Zim was too busy screaming to listen. So was GIR. But he was munching on a muffin as well. The violently flaming ship neared the ground, and plowed through the trees of a thick forest, creating a path of devastation in its wake, eventually coming to a stop somewhere on the ground in the middle of the dark forest. For a short moment, Zim and GIR had both stopped screaming. Zim wondered how he would get revenge against the filthy human and GIR took the opportunity to finish his muffin, licking his metal fingers with his fleshy pink tongue, and he pondered on when he might eat another of these delicious muffins. Their period of reflection was short lived, however, as it was interrupted by the ship's computer… "Power core critical. Implosion imminent." Judging by the computer's reaction time to certain important things lately, Zim was not overreacting when he opened the ship's battered windshield/door thing, jumped out, and ran for his life… screaming, of course. Zim ran almost blindly through the dense woods in the dead of night, but after sense caught up with him, his backpack opened and he used his big mechanical spider legs to run faster. Then there was the sound of trees and leaves rustling in a powerful wind blowing directly against Zim's face, as the Voot Cruiser sucked air and even a few whole trees into its imploding power core. The wind stopped, but Zim kept running, because he knew that it would… BOOM …explode in a blazingly bright white flash, leaving an enormous mushroom cloud behind as the light died down. Zim was out of the blast radius but was still thrown face-first into a tree trunk. He separated his face from the filthy Earth tree and stood there dazed for a moment. He shook his head and noticed that GIR was nowhere to be seen. And he heard a high pitched noise rapidly approaching him from above. It was GIR, screaming. He fell through the trees and landed face-down on the dirt with a loud THUNK, silencing him. The little robot stayed there for almost a whole minute before he jumped up and shouted, "THAT WAS FUN! I wanna do it again!" "NO GIR, not again!" "Aww…" He said, looking down at his feet in a devastating disappointment. Dib was nowhere to be found. 'Finally, I can carry out my mission in peace,' thought Zim. After a moment of self-congratulation, Zim noticed that this forest wasn't like the woods near the city. And, therefore, this couldn't be the same planet, because, logically, all the forests on any given planet would be the same. "Wait a minute!" he said to no one in particular. That wormhole must have deposited him in some other galaxy or dimension. At least it wasn't the one with the walnut-eating moose. If this wasn't Earth, maybe it was some kind of tropical forest planet? Maybe the Tallest would want to conquer it for the trees… or something. He stood there in deep thought, his little gloved hand stroking his chin. "Eh, oh well. At least the Dib human isn't here." As if on cue, a ball of fire came whistling down from the night sky, and crashed through the trees, falling almost completely straight downward. So close to Zim, in fact, that the air being displaced from the crash threw him backwards into a tree. The spacecraft opened up and two humans rolled out of it, the purple-haired scary female still punching and choking her brother, in an epic battle of vengeance for depriving her of her pizza. "HEY!" Zim called out to the humans in mortal combat. "HEY!" He called again. Neither responded. He looked to GIR, and opened his mouth to give him an order, only to find him contentedly watching the fight, and eating popcorn. Useless robot. Zim walked (goose-stepping) over to the filthy humans' means of transportation, Tak's old ship. Irken technology. Slightly outdated, and heavily modified, but still very much Irken. Unfortunately the not-so-epic space battle and crash landing had not been kind to it. At least the power core didn't implode. But it looked like this ship was out of commission for now. Zim growled in defeat, for his plan to steal the ship and leave the humans to rot on this tropical rainforest planet (that still seemed a lot like Earth) was foiled. "WILL YOU TWO QUIT IT!? WE'RE STRANDED ON AN ALIEN PLANET!" Gaz's punches to Dib's severely swollen face slowed to a halt. She was still holding Dib's limp body by his neck with one hand. She didn't stop for Zim, she heard the rustling of leaves and stopped to listen. She watched, unimpressed, as a giant beast leapt from the darkness and took a swipe at Zim, who rolled over to avoid it, and got back on his feet and began running and screaming and flailing his arms in the air. GIR was still sitting and watching, munching on popcorn, kicking his legs, and giggling in amusement. Gaz dropped her brother on the ground. He groaned and tried to get back on his feet. At least she was nice enough to punch around his glasses. Or maybe she just didn't want her knuckles full of broken glass. Hmm. He stood up, wobbling around with a lack of balance, and tried to figure out what was happening. Zim was being chased in a big circle through the trees, by a beast shaped roughly like a giant lion, but much bigger, with bat wings and a scorpion tail. His screams were abruptly ended with a loud THUD and an "OOF!" when he bumped into something. Dib and Gaz were too far away to see what he bumped into, but they saw a small sparkly flash of light in his direction. The beast roared and ran off. Gaz casually walked over there, and Dib stumbled his way over. Zim shook his head to clear his sight, then looked at what he bumped into. It was a strange black and white striped horse, roughly standing at his height, wearing several gold rings. "Eh?" Zim said. Gaz, Dib, and GIR arrived in the zebra's vision, and she asked, "What manner of creatures are you four? Creatures like these, I have never seen before." An electric sparking noise came from GIR. His face went blank, with his eyes going dark grey, and he fell to a sitting position. Zim quickly equipped his wig and contact lenses. "I'm a human! Yep! Human, human, human!" He said, even though his cover was already blown. "You're not a human! We're humans!" Dib said through his swollen mouth, with a lisp, gesturing to his sister and himself. "You're an ALIEN!" He pointed an accusing finger to the green human imposter. His rivalry with Zim made him completely oblivious to the small talking zebra. "There are no humans here, that much is clear, so that makes you the aliens my dear!" "Are you a… z-zebra?" Dib asked, finally noticing what was talking to him. "Why yes I am…" "A TALKING ZEBRA?!" Dib cut her off, "WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON?!!!" He fell to his knees and begged the answer from the starry night sky, as if the very universe was playing jokes on him. In a way, it was. What with that wormhole and all. "Yes I can speak, but so can you! It is not that hard a thing to do." Despite his momentary lapse into insanity, Dib got back on his feet and shrugged off the weirdness of his current situation, as he had long since learned to do when dealing with Zim and his shenanigans. Zim, however, had no such issues with the talking zebra. His race had conquered many different planets and peoples, so he was no stranger to another variety of sapient creatures. Even if this one looked like a FILTHLY Earth horse. "Do you always talk in rhyme?" Dib asked bluntly. "It is an old tradition of my people to speak in verse, the ponies here used to think I was uttering a curse." "Ponies?" Zim and Dib asked in unison (Zim emphasized the end of the word). Dib heard a strange high pitched squeal come from his right, but when he looked there, he only saw his sister with her usual uncaring expression. "Now if you would all follow me, the night is not safe in the Everfree. In my home we can talk, it is only a short walk." With nothing better to do, and Zim's poorly-hidden fear of that beast chasing after him again, they followed the rhyming zebra. Gaz reluctantly grabbed GIR's limp form by the arm and dragged him along with her, his face plowing up the dirt along the way. After a short walk they arrived at a large tree-hut, glowing yellow with lamp light in the darkness of the forest. The zebra opened the wooden door to the hut and walked in. "Fluttershy, my dear, what are you doing here?" She said to a shivering butter yellow ball in the middle of the floor. "Oh, thank goodness it's you Zecora." Her shaking slowed and she sat up. "I… I heard an explosion in the forest and I came to see if you were alright – even though I was scared – b-but you weren't here… so I waited and, and… oh my, what kind of animals are those?" She asked about the strange creatures shadowing Zecora on her way into her home. "I do not know, Fluttershy, but I believe they fell from the sky." "We're humans," Dib said with a lisp, "He's an Irken." "I'm a human too!" Zim corrected with a positive smile in the direction of the yellow thing. "Oh my… you can talk…" Fluttershy said. "Yea, and so can you. Big deal." Dib pointed out. Zecora gave him a dirty look. "I've never heard of a 'humin' before, what are your names?" Fluttershy asked very quietly. "You know, if, um… you don't mind me asking…" Dib was about to answer but Gaz shoved him out of the way and answered for him, "I'm Gaz, this is my idiot brother Dib, and his pathetic alien friend Zim," she said in her usual flat, uncaring tone. "HEY!" Zim responded with an angry scowl and outstretched arms, getting no response back from the girl. "Oh my… well um… I'm Fluttershy." "Zecora is how you can call me. And Dib has broken a tooth, I see." She said, stepping closer to Dib. "I have just the thing to fix that crack, give me a moment, I will be right back." With that, she walked through a bead curtain to another room. Dib ran his tongue over his front teeth and felt a jagged break in one of them. He gave his sister a dirty look and a little grumble, to which she gave him a devilish smirk in return. "So um… where did you come from…?" Fluttershy asked. Zim pretended to be uninterested with Fluttershy's question. But even Dib could see that this whole thing had Zim scared. And Dib was too, but maybe to a lesser extent, or at least, it hadn't completely hit him yet. 'Things will make sense eventually,' Dib told himself. The unknowns were what got both of them. They didn't know if that wormhole had deposited them in another dimension or on the other side of the universe. Neither possibility sounded too good. And both of them wanted to get back to their precious Earth. (Even if it was precious to them for different reasons.) Lost in thought, Dib was interrupted before he could answer. "Here, take this potion and drink, your tooth will heal quicker than you can think!" Dib grabbed a small bowl from the zebra's mouth – wait, how was she talking and holding the bowl? – and he glanced around the room at everyone else. No one was displaying any reason not to drink the mysterious potentially poisonous liquid given to him by a possibly alien tiny talking zebra. Dib shrugged and gave a "Meh," and gulped it down. A moment later, he felt his teeth shift around, and finally settle back in their original places. He ran his tongue over his teeth, "Hey! It worked! Thanks!" His lisp was now gone! "You are quite welcome, my dear. Now the answer to Fluttershy's question, I would like to hear." "Well, um," Dib looked up and tapped his chin with a finger. Fluttershy interrupted, "What's that?" pointing a hoof at a still-limp GIR. "Oh, er, him? He's um… my dog! Yes! My perfectly normal human Earth-dog." Zim stated with a content grin, even though GIR was completely undisguised. "He looks more like a… robot." "He is…" Dib added. "No he's not!" Zim retorted. "Is he supposed to be… um… broken…?" Fluttershy asked. "SILENCE! Your FILTHY horse brain couldn't even BEGIN to comprehend the complex workings of Irken technologeeeEEEE!" Zim yelled. "Oh… um… I'm sorry," Fluttershy said under her breath, avoiding eye contact by hiding behind her flowing pink hair. Zim was about to continue but couldn't because he was socked in the jaw by Gaz's fist, and knocked clean off his feet. Zim jumped up, "GRRRRRR!... WHAT WAS THAT FOR?!" He was met by a slightly angrier-than-usual Gaz's signature squinty-eyed blank expression, as Gaz grabbed Zim's collar and pointed a finger in his face. "I don't like you." She said flatly. Zecora walked closer to them and said, "Some serious anger issues you all do hide, if you are going to fight, please take it outside." She pointed a hoof to the door. The door responded by knocking loudly three times. Zecora walked over and opened it. Outside, and beginning to walk in, at Zecora's welcoming gesture, were five small colorful equines. The first one, who must have knocked, was a lavender colored one with purple hair. She appeared to have a unicorn's horn. "I'm sorry to bother you so late, Zecora, but we came to check out that explosion... we… heard…" The purple one trailed off after catching sight of the humans plus Irken human impersonator. Sparks could be heard coming from the little robot, and suddenly his eyes lit up green again. "I… I… I…" GIR repeated mechanically for a moment before Zim smacked the side of his head, making a hollow metal thunk. GIR paused for a moment, then continued… "I love this show…" Author's Note Hey guys! If you liked this, please 'follow' me and check out my other fics! Feedback is appreciated! Don't forget to give me a thumb, right down there VVVV
