/x/x/x/

Rarity stares blankly at her contacts list, attempting to think of whom she should call next, but no words form in her mind. No cohesive thoughts. Hardly even emotions. Just static.

When she’d first met Scootaloo, her opinion of the kid was not exactly high. She was dirty, disheveled, honestly kind of smelly, and didn’t really talk much. Of course, she didn’t blame her for it. She didn’t know about the accident then; just that her father, who was drunk and passed out on the couch, was an abusive piece of garbage. Thankfully there was enough on her mind that she could ignore the minor unpleasantries. Unfortunately this included the company of two people she really didn’t wish to be around.

Rainbow Dash and Applejack. Sure, in a vacuum she wouldn’t have minded spending time with either of them alone. She wasn’t exactly super close friends with Applejack, but their younger sisters were, so they definitely had a civil relationship. And Rainbow Dash was definitely obnoxious and a bit of a troublemaker, but she had a good heart. The problem was that the two girls just would not stop going at each other’s throats.

“We should put the heavy boxes underneath the lighter boxes.”

“No, we should put the light boxes BEHIND the heavier boxes.”

“Um. It’s my truck, peanut brain, I think I know how to load it up.”

“You think you’re the only one who’s ever loaded up a truck, shitkickers?”

“Well I’m clearly the only one who knows how to keep a promise, flakebow.”

“Will you just shut up about that stupid bake sale already?”

“I’ll shut up about you makin’ a fool of me when you shut up about the boxes!”

“Your head looks like a box!”

“That don’t even make sense!”

“GIRLS!” Rarity shouted, interrupting the two. “Can we please try to maintain some civility in front of Loo? We’re supposed to be helping her get OUT of a stressful situation!”

Applejack and Rainbow both sighed. “Fine,” they chimed in unison.

“Thank you. Now, can I leave you two alone for three minutes so I can go upstairs and check on our guest?”

“Yeah,” they both said.

“Thank you.”

Past the mountain of beer cans, through the den of the snoring behemoth, up the stairs and into the bedroom, Rarity nudged the door open a crack.

“Belle, is everything going okay?”

“Yeah Rare, we just got a couple left. We’re down to posters and socks.”

Loo and Bloom sat in the far corner, rolling and folding, while Belle wrapped tape over a box.

“This one’s electronics and CDs. You think we should put this in the bed, or keep it in the cab?”

“I’m just carrying, dear, Applejack is the one making the decisions. Or at least she’s trying to. Rainbow is being a tad stubborn, as usual.”

“Rainbow’s not that bad, once you get to know her.”

Bloom scoffed at this.

“She’s a good track captain!” Belle defended.

“Yeah, sure, long as you ain’t askin’ her or the softball team any favors.”

“Oh, can you let that go? Any time I mention Rainbow’s name that’s all that either of you ever talk about.”

“Girls,” Rarity murmured, pinching the bridge of her nose. “Maybe now isn’t the time for that?”

“It’s fine,” Loo said, matching another pair. “I don’t mind the distraction right now. This… sucks. I know I asked you all to help me out with this and all but all I can think about is how I’m moving houses twice in one year when all I wanted was to just stay in LP.”

Rarity strode in and knelt down next to her.

“I know that this is difficult. I’ve never had to move myself but I know that every object in here is a memory, and confronting those memories, no matter how happy or sad, can definitely move you emotionally. You’ve been through a lot more than two moves this year, but you’ve been strong enough to get through worse.”

“Yeah…” she leaned over to rest a head on Rarity’s shoulder. “That makes sense. I just was thinking about how when I unpacked this last time, I was stressing about how eventually when I went to college mom would help me decide what to take and what to leave. What to have in my dorm and what to have for holidays and breaks. And now… now I wish I was picking stuff out, not just putting literally all of it away.”

“We’re nearly done, then hopefully you can focus on the future memories you’ll make to replace the potential ones you’ve lost.”

“Right.” She sighed. “Is… is he still asleep?”

“He is. Do you want to leave now before he wakes up?”

“No, I’ll be fine. Even if he does, he’s not gonna talk to me. I hope.”

“I’ll stand between the two of you if I have to.”

“You’re not afraid he’ll… hurt you?”

“I think I can take an overweight drunkard in a fight on my own, and both Rainbow and Applejack can beat me at anything physical. You’ll be safe, I promise.”

Rarity purses her lips as the memory of those words leaves a sour taste on her tongue.

She dials Applejack, who answers after one ring.

“Rare?”

She laughs, despite the somber mood.

“Waiting for me, were you?”

“I figured you were gonna reach out sometime soon, given what your sister said.”

“What all did she say?”

“Y’all found out and kicked Scoots outta the house.”

“Ah Just the simple basics then?”

“Well, she also mentioned something about some physical violence and lying about some pretty vile stuff. Sexual stuff… I dunno if it’s the truth or not.”

“As far as I can tell, Scootaloo struck her, lied about being sexually assaulted, and has been blackmailing her with something to keep her under her thumb. I believe that… for the most part.”

“Didn’t hear nothin’ about no blackmail.”

“That’s the bit I’m still on the fence about. Honestly, the other day when I talked to the two of them to make sure they were telling the truth, things seemed a bit suspicious, but at the time I felt that the answer I was given was much less suspicious than the alternative. However, given the benefit of hindsight, I realize now how stupid I’ve been. Belle was the one who texted your sister, who was out of the loop of their conspiracy, and frankly, I’m certain that she is the one who stole my photos. She’s probably even the one who leaked our little costume party too. At this point I know that nothing Sunset has been accused of doing since Twilight left… well… actually happened.”

“Yeah…?”

Rarity sighs.

“I was wrong, Applejack. About everything. I was so certain that Sunset was still evil that it blinded me to the truth, that the ones I lived with are the ones who took advantage of my trust. That my own sister betrayed me. Whether of her own volition or due to the influence of one I consider my sister as well. But much as I’m struggling with that, it’s the furthest thing from my mind right now.”

“Mmhmm.” Beat. “Then. What is on your mind?”

Rarity presses her fingers to her eyes. “Sunset. I owe her an apology. I owe all of you an apology, but I don’t even know where to start. I’ve called Rainbow already, both to warn her given I’m sure Loo is going to try to live there now, and also to admit what a clown I’ve been this weekend. Sunset would ordinarily be first on my list but as you can probably tell I can’t exactly call her.”

“Why not?” She asked, earnestly.

“Ah, she didn’t mention. Right. I’m holding her phone.”

“…ooohhh, so that’s how you found out.”

“Belle asked me to fetch her phone from her bedside table. And there were three. Hers, Loo’s, and Sunset’s. Loo yelled at her quite a bit about being incompetent, and purposefully sabotaging her, and-“

“Wait, wait, Belle sabotaged her?”

“Frankly I don’t know. It may have been revenge for being hit and lied to. But that seems awfully petty given how close they are and how much trouble she’s surely going to be in, and how damaged our relationship is. And if it was a careless mistake, that doesn’t exactly fit their modus operandi given how skillfully they’ve been manipulating all of us. A third option that terrifies me the most is that she wanted to be caught and this is their latest scheme, and that somehow or another, we’re falling into their trap, and that by grounding Belle and evicting Loo we’re setting off a chain reaction that ultimately ends up hurting Sunset more than they have. More than I have.”

“That don’t seem likely.”

“Maybe. Maybe not. I don’t know. I’m tired of running the scenarios. I’m tired of these girls. I’m tired of this house. I’m just tired, Applejack. I’m so tired of everything.”

“Rare…”

“I’m especially tired of the wedge between us. Under Sunset I was separated from all of you, but I still could see you in school. I could still have the same conversation I could have with anyone else. Besides Pinkie, of course. But as it stands now, there is a gulf between myself and every single one of you. Especially Fluttershy. I fear it to be insurmountable. I’m afraid, Applejack. I’m afraid that I’ve done irreparable damage to our friendships. I’m…”

“I know. I was scared the whole drive to Sunset’s apartment. I wasn’t sure what to expect. It coulda been anything. She coulda attacked me. She coulda been gone. She coulda been bled out, hangin, drowned in the bath, starved to death, All the worst possibilities were runnin through my head. But the possibility that gave me the strength to knock on the door was that I could apologize to her, make things right, help her out, and we could go back to how things were after Twilight and before all this Anon A Miss bull happened.”

“Is that still a possibility?”

“I don’t know. The only one who knows is Sunset. And you’ll have to call Dash or Pinkie to figure it out.”

“She isn’t with you?”

“Naw, she warnt comfy bout seein Bloom again. So she stayed the night at Dash’s last night, and she should be at Pinkie’s at some point today.”

“Okay. Thank you.”

“Course.”

“And. I’m sorry.”

“I know.”

“I’ll be saying that a lot today.”

“Yup.”

“Could you forgive me given time?”

“Aw, sugar cube, I forgive ya now! I ain’t gonna hold one weekend of bad decisions against ya. I held a grudge against Rainbow for two years, over nothin. Didn’t make me feel good. Just made those years miserable. I’m just glad that you’ve come to your senses, and I tell ya it’s a huge relief to know you’re wantin to make things right.”

“Good. I’m certainly glad for that.”

“If nothin else, I want us to be square so it’ll make it easier for our sisters to heal their relationship.”

“Yes, of course. Sunset is my priority right now. However, were I to rank my priorities, Belle and Bloom definitely top the list otherwise.”

“Good list. I’m hopin Fluttershy is in there too.”

“Eugh, she is, but I’m the most apprehensive about her.”

“Rare, out of all of our friends she’s probably gonna be the quickest one to forgive ya and accept your apology, especially if you’re making things right with the rest of us too.”

“Well… there’s actually been somewhat of a development there.”

“Oh?”

“It’s not a positive one, I’m afraid.”

“What’d you do?”

“I attempted to manipulate Fluttershy into telling the rest of you that I believed Sunset, in order to lower Sunset’s guard so that I could expose her.”

“Well. That ain’t that bad, all things considered. Ain’t good either, but it makes sense you’d do that. I ain’t one for lyin’ but I suppose I can deal with a white lie if the end goal is to bring the truth forward. Especially if it’s to protect your friends.”

“And I’ve been asking Flash’s help to monitor Sunset and Belle’s account activity for more proof.”

“That’s just recon. Nothin totally wrong with that.”

“And I threw Micro’s attraction to me in his face when he did his technological sorcery and found proof that Sunset was innocent but I refused to accept it and assumed he was being blackmailed, or incentivized to cover for Sunset because she promised him more explicit photos of me.”

“Well you owe him an apology for that, but you gotta remember you’ve been as much a victim of Scoot and Belle as any of us if not more so. There’s no sense beatin yourself up over every single mistake you made. Wallowing in self pity ain’t gonna fix nothin. But you callin me and bein so honest about your feelings and actions is a step in the right direction. You’re tryin to be better, and that’s good enough for me.”

“It isn’t going to erase what I’ve done…”

“No. It ain’t. But it don’t have to. Sunset did horrible things to all of us too, and she tried to do better. And I say she succeeded. And you ain’t done nothin near as bad as her. So if Sunset deserves forgiveness, then so do you.”

“I suppose so. It just feels wrong of me to ask it.”

“That’s the guilt and shame talkin. But trust me when I say that you deserve it just by wantin it. And, you know, even if Scoots herself came to me and apologized, and was real about it, I’d forgive her too. Course I don’t think that’s gonna happen any time soon, and I can’t say the rest of our friends would do the same, but what I can say is that you ain’t unsalvageable. Least not to me.”

“And what of Sunset?”

“I dunno. Again, you gotta ask her yourself.”

“I see.”

“I can’t promise she’s gonna forgive ya, but if you ask me, you should apologize whether it gets accepted or not. What matters more than getting back to normal is undoin the damage you done. Shouldn’t be too much work in your case. And if you need help, I’m here. Even if I’m the only one in your corner, I’ll be there.”

“Thank you.”

“Any time. Now, uh, I ain’t about to rush you,”

“But chores wait for nobody?”

“Exactly. We can talk later if you need. Just shoot me a text and I’ll let you know when I’m available, okay?”

“I will.”

“Good. Later.”

She waits a moment before hanging up in case any last words needed to be said, but none were needed. She heaves a sigh of relief, knowing that at least the boulder started rolling.

Now the hard part.

/x/x/x/

Sunset flexes her fingers, testing the tensile strength of the gauze around her arms.

“You really know your way around this stuff.”

“I should certainly hope so, given how much practice I’ve had,” Windy murmurs, distracted. “That should hold better, too.”

“I can actually kinda bend my elbows now, without it hurting.”

“Good, good…” she sits on the couch, staring down at her hands. “And that ointment should help with the scabs. Oh, and, I’m sure I don’t have to tell you this, but try not to touch them as they form. The scar tissue will remain for months if not years, but hopefully it flattens out within the next week or so.”

“I can’t say I’m looking forward to that, but I suppose it’s a natural consequence of hurting myself like that…” Sunset takes a seat on a chair, pulling Twilight’s journal into her lap. “And I’ll try not to drown too much in beating myself up over it.”

“Good plan.”

Sunset runs a finger up the book’s spine. She contemplates asking for help writing a message in it, but finds no motivation to do so. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust Windy or anything, but it was more so that she didn’t know what to say other than the base updates. She decides to save the update for later that night, finding some solace in the poetic irony of Pinkie’s house being relegated to the positive updates to Twilight. And speaking of…

“You sure you’re ok driving me all the way out there?” Sunset asks, acknowledging that Pinkie didn’t exactly live within the city limits.

“Of course, dear. I have to run a few errands this evening anyway.”

“This evening?” She asks, looking up, concern etched upon her forehead. “I hope you’re not gonna drive in the blizzard.”

“Oh, it’s hardly gonna be a blizzard. I’ve driven worse vehicles in tougher conditions before. But, I promise that if it gets bad enough, I’m not going to put myself in danger.”

“Alright. Just making sure. Although, it’s funny. I’m not really in a position to mom you, I’m…” she laughs despite herself. “As of now, you’re kinda the strongest maternal figure I’ve had since Celestia.”

“Principal Celestia is a maternal figure to you?”

“Huh? Oh. No, I don’t mean her. I mean the other one.”

“Other one?”

Sunset winces before sighing. “Ah,” she mutters. “Right. Okay, so, another little thing about Equestria is that apparently it’s kind of a dimensional mirror of this world. The human Celestia here is the principal of the high school, but the pony Celestia is the Princess of Equestria.”

“Princess, huh? Who’s the queen and king?”

“Oh, we don’t have either. See, before the Unified Nations of Equestria were established, the unicorn kingdom had a monarchy, the pegasi legion had a stratocracy, and the earth ponies had a parliamentary republic. So when they merged governments, they retained aspects of each one. As a show of good faith to each other, Princess Platinum, Commander Hurricane, and Chancellor Puddinghead-“

“Pudding... Head?”

“Yes, Chancellor Puddinghead, the supreme leader of the earth ponies. They all agreed that the various leaders of the different aspects of governance would have different titles depending on exactly what it was they were involved with, as determined by a democratic election. So, since Princess Celestia is responsible for raising the sun and the moon- or, I guess just the sun now since Luna returned from her banishment to the moon- the ponies of Canterlot voted that she be referred to as such because the words sun and moon are derived from Olde Ponish for King and Queen. And that was over a thousand years ago, so it just kinda stuck. Now, anyone who holds diplomatic power in Canterlot is referred to as prince or princess, depending on their preference. Technically Prince Blueblood isn’t royalty, he’s the Magistrate of Canterlot, but everypony still refers to him as Prince. Some ponies outside of Canterlot tend to think he’s Celestia’s nephew because of it, even though he was an elected official. Although I have no idea how he earned the position, he’s a complete idiot. Probably nepotism.”

“I’m sorry, that’s a lot of information I’m going to ask about in the future but right now I’m just hung up on the fact that the earth ponies ruler was named Puddinghead.”

“She was definitely quirky, but she was a very effective leader. She was charismatic enough that ponies followed the seemingly absurd laws she’d put in place. Like, there was one year that she’d legally mandated carrot juice be drank at every meal, which you’d think was incredibly strange, but as it turns out, Discord- basically he’s a chaos demon- created a plague that would’ve taken the eyesight of everypony and flipped it backwards, so red and green switched, but apparently there’s some magical property of carrots that helps protect your eyesight from chaos-based plagues.”

“I wonder if there’s versions of all of them somewhere in our history.”

“Probably. I’m not exactly the biggest history buff on this side. There’s probably a second you.”

“Is there a second Twilight Sparkle?”

Sunset blinks a few times.

“I can’t say for sure. But I’m sure there is one. Probably.”

“Is there another Sunset Shimmer?”

“I sure hope not. That would be awkward. But… yeah. There probably is.”

“Did you ever have a plan for if you met her?”

“No, honestly. I never made long-term what-if plans. I took things day by day for survival when I first got here. By the time I was set and settled, I figured, not making long term plans suited me for that long so why bother starting now? Being reactive worked. And then, the one time I put together a long term plan, Twilight ruined it.”

“Ah. I see. So… I take it you don’t have a plan now?”

“Plan for what?”

“Returning to a normal life. You’ve been isolated, starving, and in pain for so long. Bodies and minds that have faced trauma tend to return to that trauma as a coping mechanism. And the last thing I’d want to see you do is to spiral back into unhealthy patterns.”

“If it was just me, then I probably would. But with Rainbow, and Applejack, and Fluttershy and Pinkie, even Twilight involved, I don’t think they would let me. And now that I have this second chance, I’m not going to just throw it away. I want to be better. I will be.”

Windy nods. “That answer fills me with confidence in you. But I have to ask, are you going to continue riding that deathtrap on wheels?”

“Motorcycles are just as safe as bicycles so long as you wear the protective headgear.”

“Honey, as a medical professional I can guarantee you that’s not true. Drivers are crazy out there. So many cyclists end up roadkill it’s not even funny.”

“Believe me, I know, I almost got killed a couple years back. But I had enough maneuverability to get around and be fine.”

Windy contemplates letting her know who that was. But what would it even accomplish? Would knowing that accident was most likely the catalyst for all of this drama bring any solace? Or would it just muddy the waters even further? Truth for its own sake versus tact. If Sunset knew Scootaloo was in the car that fateful day, and that the reason Anon A Miss was pushed so hard was because she was in the wrong place at the wrong time, there was a very high likelihood Sunset might blame herself for ending up in this mess to begin with, and that wouldn’t exactly be conducive to healing.

Sometimes honesty just isn’t the best policy after all.

“Touché,” she ultimately says, conceding. “But we’ll be driving the car once Bow gets back.”

“Not like I can drive right now anyway. Or that I’d want to. Some days I miss teleportation.”

“You could teleport?”

“Yeah. Takes a lot of power and concentration but yeah. I miss it, and transmutation, and conjuration, and even something as simple as a little firecracker… but I’ve long since said goodbye to magic.”

“Were you particularly adept with it?”

“Adept? Are you kidding, I was the most powerful unicorn in Equestria! Top three in the world. There’s a stallion in Saddle Arabia and a mare in Neighpon who could give me a run for my money, but he’s a pompous ass and she’s so boring. But I was strong. Maybe not strong enough to be Princess, or Queen… which took me a while to realize. I definitely lacked the humility.”

“Well, surely you developed some now, huh?”

“Yeah…” Sunset ponders what Celestia would have to say to her now. Likely nothing but disappointment and resentment. She’d stormed off like a little filly, poisoned an entire community against each other, only came back to steal the crown, and not once ever bothered to drop by and apologize. Surely Celestia hated her now, and Equestria was lost to her forever. “But it’s not like I’m going back. Magic is just something I used to be good at. Now my skill set is…” her shoulders fall lower. “Uh. Manipulation, I guess?”

“You’ll find yourself again. You’re still in high school. When I was your age I wanted to be a singer, or an actress. I thought that the military was just a way to get myself to a place where I could do my dream full time, but things didn’t exactly turn out that way.”

“So. Having Rainbow interfered with your dream?”

She laughs. “No, no. Having Rainbow made me realize that she is my dream. I love being a mother. When I held her in my hands for the very first time, all the pain of childbirth went away. When I saw that little baby, I knew then and there that that’s who I was. I didn’t know in high school because I was still a kid; how could I know who I was until I became who I was meant to be?” She leans forward at this. “You won’t know what kind of person you are until you become her. You’re still a work in progress, and one day you will wake up and remember this whole sordid affair and you’ll see what an incredible journey you’ve made. You just have to get there first.”

“Yeah… I guess that makes sense.”

“With that being said. Don’t get pregnant. Finish your education first.”

“Hey, don’t worry about that. I’m not into human boys like that.”

“And what about human girls?”

Sunset blushes at this. “I don’t know. I’m not gonna worry about romance any time soon regardless. I’m barely getting a hold on friendship as it is. And…” her mind flashes lavender for a brief moment. “Well. I think any strong romance is built on an even stronger bedrock of friendship, right?”

Windy nods. “Absolutely. Bow is my best friend in the whole world, and the second most important person in my life. Behind Rainbow, of course.”

“I figured I haven’t shot that far up your rankings yet.”

“Eh, you’re at least top ten.”

As the two shared in laughter, the front door opened, letting in a gust of chill. It quickly shuts again.

“This weather sucks!” Bow gripes from the door.

/x/x/x/

“This weather sucks…” Scootaloo grumbles as the cold slices through her bones, and she regrets not putting on a second shirt.

She trudges up the sidewalk to a familiar door and slowly raises a fist to knock. She hesitates before reaching down to press on the door bell.

She waits a few moments before the door opens inwards.

“Sorry, but I’m not interested in whatever you’re- oh?”

“Hi Ms Cheerilee.”

The young teacher puts on a unique expression somewhere between smiling and frowning. Smowning?

“Hello Scootaloo.” An awkward silence descends upon the two. Scoot doesn’t seek to break it, and Cheerilee is content to stand in place and wait for somebody to say something. Eventually though, enough heat escapes the house that she elects to take a step outside and close the door most of the way shut behind her. “What brings you here?” She eventually asks.

“I’m…” she sighs. “I’m not welcome at Belle and Rarity’s house anymore.”

“Is that so?” Cheerilee feigns interest as she eyes the darkening clouds on the western horizon. “Might that have anything to do with the Anon a Miss business?”

Scoot’s eyes meet her brows. “You know about that?”

“Dear, everyone knows about that. It’s all that your fellow crusaders have been talking about for the past hour, and that caught like a wildfire. You can’t even look on MyStable in this town without finding information on the identity, the true identity that is, of the person behind that blog.”

“Those are just rumors.”

Cheerilee huffs. “Ms Cheerilee caught selling tests to the football team. Dot dot dot. And maybe something more? Three question marks. Now that’s a rumor.”

“Look, that wasn’t-”

“I had three very long meetings with Superintendent Neighsay because of your little post you tried to pin on Sunset Shimmer. I had to release my phone records to the police. I had to retype tests and the entire football team had to retake them and then I had to regrade them. Do you understand how bad their handwriting is?”

“I’m sorry, okay?”

She nods. “No. It’s not okay Scootaloo. It’s not okay to treat people the way you have been. I know that things were very tough for you when you first transferred here, and I’d like to think that I’ve been a good homeroom teacher for you. I have given you several deadline extensions I wouldn’t give to most any other student. Not because of favoritism, but because I know you’ve needed it. You’ve needed separate rooms for testing, which I’ve given you. You’ve needed the opportunity to take a break in the hall, which I’ve given you. And most recently, I’ve given you extra computer lab privileges for your little music videos. And I’ve been happy to do it. But to see that you’ve repaid my kindness with threatening my career, it just makes me regret having ever helped you. And I hate that feeling. So if you’re here to apologize, I suppose it would only be right for me to accept it. But considering those clouds, what I’ve seen on MyStable, and the fact that you’ve walked here with two bags in tow, I seriously doubt that you’re just here to apologize.”

“I just need a place to stay for the night.”

Cheerilee sighs. “Considering your previous place of residence is right down the street, I presume I’m the first person you’ve asked.”

“I mean. Yeah-“

“Well, then I can in good conscience turn you away.”

Scoot grunts. “Whatever.”

“I don’t owe you lodgings. I owe you education. And even though I’m not your teacher until Monday, I’ll give you this one for free. Don’t act like an entitled brat if you don’t wanna be treated like one.”

“You should write that one down.”

She shakes her head as she steps back inside. “I truly do hope that someone takes you in tonight. But it’s not going to be me.” Cheerilee closes the door without awaiting a reply, and locks the door. Through the keyhole she sees that Scoot waits for a minute before turning and walking away. Once she is gone, Cheerilee turns around and sits on the floor, before resting her head on her knees.

/x/x/x/

As Bloom puts the final touches on her last paragraph of the morning before her lunch break, she finally pays attention to the welling sense of dread in her stomach.

Much as she’d promised Belle that things could be better, she had serious doubts that they would be. Or that they even could be.

She thinks back to that first day of meeting her. She was a new transfer from Crystal Academy, dropped from that private school for financial reasons, and placed into CHS because hey it’s there. Too poor for those stuffy upper crust folks but perceived as too privileged for the suburbanites, stuck somewhere in the middle. It reminded Bloom of herself.

She was never bullied. Never ostracized. Never discounted. But never truly accepted either. She was just. There. Big Mac was the best darn linebacker they’d ever seen, so he had it in with all the jocks. He was also the much-needed tank for several of Micro’s campaigns in Ogres & Oubliettes, so he had it in with all of the nerds too. He and the truck had helped ferry cargo for anything from animal shelters to flea markets to farm co-ops from here to Manehattan. He was a Canterlot legend, and even though he’d had nary a word to say besides “eeyup” to anyone who wasn’t family, everyone frickin loved him.

Applejack was in a similar boat for many of the other groups, but was a step or so away given her semester spent in Manehattan. However upon returning she was still the same ol’ Applejack. She was hardly anyone’s favorite person in the world, but she always somehow managed to be top ten for everyone in the whole school. For Faust’s sake, she was on everybody’s MyStable without even knowing how the dang app even worked, let alone making posts on it often enough to warrant being on near everyone’s top ten. The only one to rival her popularity in that regard was Pinkie, and that was hardly fair. Applejack stood out from the crowd enough that she stood apart from her brother enough to be celebrated for her own accomplishments and her own achievements.

And then there was Bloom. Who? You know, Big Mac and AJ’s little sister. Oh, her! That kid! Yeah. She’s adorable. Uh-huh. So what’s her personality like? And that’s where everyone would kind of freeze in place and realize that they didn’t actually know her at all. Nobody would know at a glance that she loved martial arts movies and chemistry and wood shop and behavioral psychology just as much as she loved apples and apple based dishes and apple cultivation techniques and big honkin combine threshers. And nobody would know she actually liked pears more than apples. But nobody cared enough to ask her what she was into. Nobody really asked her much of anything all besides “can you tell your big sibs that such and such?” She was just a tool used to get at AJ or Mac.

So, being somewhat of an outcast herself, Bloom felt for this new girl sitting in the corner all by herself. If they were both gonna be in the background, they may as well have been in the background together. All it took was one little “hi how are ya” to engage in a conversation that lasted so long they were still chatting together in the lunch room long after school had actually ended and they both got in trouble for accidentally playing hooky. And ever since then, not a week had gone by that they hadn’t gotten into some sort of trouble together.

Much as she loathed to admit it, Bloom recognized that after they recruited Scootaloo into their friend group, it stopped being a 50 50 relationship, and never really hit 33 33 33. It was more 35 35 30. And that was fine. But then it became 40 40 20. Then 45 45 10. That’s when Anon a Miss was conceived. She was losing her sister to Sunset, and her friends to each other, and this was a last ditch effort to scrape together what social interactions she had left. But it backfired, and by the time Anon a Miss reached the height of its terror, it was 49.5 49.5 and 1, and guess who got the short end of that stick.

The damage to their relationship went far beyond this most recent spat. That’s why Bloom found it easy enough to make promises that the Anon a Miss fiasco wasn’t damaging their relationship. The blog wasn’t the cause of their fracture, but the RESULT of it.

Once the hope that things would get better got outweighed by the truest extent of the far-reaching consequences of ruining Sunset’s life- in no small part due to Scootaloo’s vendetta- that was when she came clean. No sooner. No later.

There was just no point in carrying it on. She didn’t even want to hurt Sunset, she just wanted to spend more time with her sister since her best friends started to exclude her from their life. Sunset was just the perfect scapegoat.

But even still… even despite all of these facts. Belle and Scoot had broken apart. And now, faced with the opportunity to salvage what she could from her relationship with Belle. She would take it. Any opportunity to have her friend back was worth the heartache and loneliness of the alternative.

So surely Scootaloo would be fine on her own for a few days.

Right?

/x/x/x/

Rainbow rides the elevator in silence. She pays no mind to the number on the half-worn digital readout, the red dots not even giving enough information to tell what the actual current floor is. She just stares at that weird off-white stain in the corner that she desperately hopes is not a bodily fluid of some sort.

Even when the elevator stops, dings, and opens the door, she doesn’t move. A cacophony of sound bites run around in her head, the individual words indiscernible from the rest of the noise. A soup of emotions all thrown into the bowl of her brain, coalescing into a miasmatic sludge of pure nothing and everything all at once.

A sharp pain in her palms awakens her to reality. She looks down to see her fists clenched so tightly the skin is white. She lets go, and looks at the deep indents left by her fingernails. She wiggles her thumbs and winces at the pain in whatever the hell that fleshy bit is called. Thalmor Embassy or something.

As the doors begin to close, she stops them in their tracks with a foot before stepping out into the hallway proper. Two days ago this was the most vibrant and welcoming place in the world, and one of the most joyous sights she could conceive of. But now the colors were faded, the buzzing of the fluorescent lights irritated the living shit out of her, and the carpet smelled funky. A hundred tiny little nuisances occupied the entire breadth of her attention, and her mind welcomed the noise of reality as a distraction from the noise inside her head.

She shuffles down the hall, dragging her duffel bag along. It wasn’t particularly heavy in physical weight, but what the bag represented, the weakness of relying on others, was more than her arms were willing to carry. The last few weeks were defined by being a rock for everyone else in her life to lean on, and now that the pressure was gone to hold everyone together, the absence of it only made the rest of the pressure run her life that much louder by comparison.

Now everyone knows you’re a dirty little faggot, the noise finally says. And she freezes in place.

The running dialogue is replaced by a repeated shut up with the occasional shut the fuck up thrown in for good measure. And a few still images of bashing a certain someone’s face in with a crowbar. And a few still images of doing the same to herself. Knives. Ropes. Long walks in concrete shoes off of short piers.

She takes a step, putting all of her focus and attention onto her footfalls. Left. Right. Left. Right. Pressing forward, mentally numb, thoughts both quiet and loud spackling her consciousness. A hundred mental snapshots of potential outcomes when she goes back to school flash through her head.

What will the girls on the tennis team think of her? The softball team? Mrs Sage, Ms Cheerilee, Professor Cane, will they look at her differently? Will they talk to her differently? Surely.

The only thing she couldn’t stand the thought of was all of the fake performative allyship from the people who wouldn’t have anything good or bad to say to her at all, suddenly coming up to her and acting like they were all best of friends, nobody actually caring who she was as a person, just seeing her as a lesbian people can talk to so they can go home and pat themselves on the back for being such a good person that they talked to a gay person without calling them a slur to their face. And that’s all she would be to them. Not Rainbow Dash. Just some queer they know.

She would rather die than disappear into an ocean of identity politics.

Her feet finally stop of their own volition. She looks at the all too familiar butterfly stickers on the door. Her arms knocks twice. And after a few moments, the door slowly opens.

And all of the pain and fear and worry and stress melts away.

She walks into the apartment, and the scourge leaves. Her body sighs in relief as her mind sheds the negative thoughts, throwing them away as one would toss clipped toenails.

Things would go on as they always would. Whoever had anything bad to say to her didn’t matter. Whoever would use and abuse her for their own gain didn’t matter. Whoever hurt her in the past, the present, the future, it didn’t matter. All that mattered right here, right now, was her closest, oldest, and best friend in the world, holding her as she fell to her knees and cried.

Somewhere buried deep within the forest of confusion and misery and terror and agony was a seed of hope. Hope for a brighter and better future. Hope for herself, hope for Rarity, and hope for Sunset Shimmer. Hope that despite everything, she would still have her friends and family. Hope that after this darkness passes and her tears are shed, that her life would go on in new and unexpected directions. Hope that like a candle in the rain, she would still burn bright until snuffed out.

She vowed not to let Scootaloo’s actions ruin her life, but instead to enhance it and take it in new directions.

But that was a thought for the future.

For now, her body just needed to cry in Fluttershy’s arms. And then tomorrow will be better.

It has to be.

/x/x/x/

Author's Note

this year’s been hard. but next year will be better