Fallout Equestria: Desperados

FoE: Desperados, Ch53, Jailbird.

Jailbird, Part 2

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"As Star Charter sang all the songs she could remember, I found that a lot of them were steeped in violence and faith. Nothing all that surprising to me from what she had told me about the Blackwater. But there was also a sense of comradery in the lyrics, as though a message passed down telling others that though life was rough, they could get through it together.

If it was not for the wanton violence it seemed these pirates get up to, I would love to see this Blackwater and the ponies who lived on it..” ~ Azure Dice

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Our second day of hard labor had finally passed, and I was already sick of it. If I could hide not giving Spritz Cookie her share of food, or better yet steal some myself, I would have. Unfortunately, her followers were watching us like hawks, making her tribute law.

Fucking asskissers.

As for the other prisoners we were working with, they also watched us, whispering among their ganger mates. Same for Cattle Prod and the other snitches.

Thanks to Cherry, Railway, and Bitter, we now had a better idea of what really was going on. From where we sat, we could see how the prison gang broke down here.

Cattle Prod was in charge of the Cleaners: The ponies who handle both cleaning and cooking duty. They don't have to work in the quarry. Before Spritz showed up, they weren’t as cozy with the guards as they are now… or not as blatantly so, at least. Spritz scared Cattle Prod so much that he and his crew openly took on the stigma of a snitch just for some protection from Spritz.

The other gangers hadn't gone after Cattle Prod because he had full control of the laundry room where all the contraband was hidden. Since he was cozy with the NCRCF ponies, they also didn't harass him as much as other prisoners. In short, the prick was in a sweet spot where everypony hated him, but also left him alone.

Then there was Spritz herself, who had at least half the inmates on her side. Most followed her out of fear, but she had some true believers eating up her anti-NCR speeches, too. The only place she had any real control over was the black powder room, even though she never went near it. I’m not the smartest pony, but even I knew she must have been planning something explosive if she wanted control of that room.

Last were the inmates calling themselves the Ganger Alliance. They were made up of the followers of the bosses Spritz had killed, but who didn’t join her afterwards. As such, they had no leader. They controlled the showers and the visitor room, but had stopped most of their activities involving the NCR either out of fear of Spritz or because they simply couldn't keep them up. Bitter Tea told me that prisoners had stopped prostituting themselves to the guards because of a loss of negotiation power. As for activities in the showers, Cattle Prod had tightened the flow of contraband, so most inmates couldn't afford to do much but sit around and gamble with what little they still had.

This place was a powder keg ready to blow, and the guards were clutching their guns in anticipation.

I munched on my bread which had absorbed the gruel and gone soggy. I turned my attention to Slowtrot and Harp. They weren't having the best of times here. Slowtrot had healed a little more, but he still couldn't move from the pain in his back. Harp, on the other hoof, was exhausted. The hard labor was far worse than when she put on the slave dress.

I wasn't doing much better, but at least my body was strong enough to deal with it.

“You know what this needs?” Slowtrot said as he looked down at his dinner. “Some hot sauce or mustard. Or, better yet, both.”

Harp raised an eyebrow. “Would that make it sweeter or more savory?”

He shrugged. “A bit, but they're mostly strong in flavor with some heat. It helps spice up how bland all this is.”

He wasn't wrong. Nothing we were given had much of any flavor at all.

It reminded me a bit of the Blackwater and how most of what we had to eat was the dried fish, biscuits, and bergoo that the ships would deliver occasionally. It was almost as tasteless as the food I was eating here. The only way to make it even barely edible was by getting our hooves on some Garum.

I don’t know why, but thinking about it made my mouth water. “Ya, some Garum would make this better.”

Now both Harp and Slowtrot looked at me.

“What's that?” Harp asked.

“Garum? Oh, it was a common export for the Blackwater aside from making weapons and armor and shit,” I explained. “If I remember correctly, it was fermented fish guts and salt. Victoria always managed to steal a bottle for us at the church. It made the crummy food go down so much better.”

They each gave me a look of disgust.

I went on the defensive. “What? We lived out in the middle of the ocean and it actually tasted pretty damn good. I’m sure little miss princess here used weird crap on her food.”

Harp straightened up, trying to look prim and proper despite how exhausted she looked. “Well, if you're asking, we had a lot of different sauces to use. But, personally, my favorite was the pineapple wine sauce. It just added a sweetness to any food that can’t be compared.” She then sighed. “Stratus Dancer once brought me a peasant dish called pizza. It went so well with the pineapple sauce.”

I laughed as Slowtrot’s face scrunched up in disgust.

Slowtrot and Harp decided to stay in the mess hall when we finished since they both weren't feeling like moving around much. I couldn’t blame them, but I decided it was time I looked around on my own.

I wanted to find the showers and see what, if anything, the Ganger Alliance was doing there. I knew Harp had settled on working with Spritz, but a backup plan was never a bad idea.

As I trotted along the fence line, I keptan eye out for Spritz. A sharp whistle caught my attention. I turned to find two faces I couldn't have been less happy to see.

“See? I told you she was here.” Stone Spear said to Rock Thrower. The two lug-headed NCR regulars from the Ruffled Feathers were staring at me in amusement.

“Damn, you weren't messing. Hey, Star, did you finally kill somepony?” Rock Thrower called out to me as the two trotted over.

I sighed and shot an annoyed glare at them. “No, I didn’t kill anypony… unless it’s a crime to kill a raider?”

The two looked at each other, then shrugged.

Rock Thrower then smugly smiled. “Then whatcha in here for? Only criminals are on this side of the fence.”

I raised my eyebrow at him. It took him a moment to realize what he just said. “Your side of the fence,” he corrected himself.

“Not that you believe me, but it was Ashy who killed somepony, the griffon Hardballer. Then she threw us here to shut us up.”

Stone Spear gave a bemused whistle. “Big claims for a working mare like yourself. Then again, a lot of the ponies in here say they're innocent. Like fuck we believe them.”

I rolled my eyes and trotted away. Stone Spear's annoying voice hit my ears again as he said, “If you really want us to listen, maybe tell it to somepony who cares, or you can always meet us in the visitor room.”

I stopped dead in my tracks. The idea of those two even propositioning me made me want to retch. Turning around, I trotted right up to the fence to get eye to eye with Stone Spear. “The only reason I’d ever get anywhere near your pencil dicks would be to crush them flat.”

Stone Spear then blew me a kiss. “Jokes on you. I’m into that shit. So what do ya say?”

“Fuck off!” I growled out at him.

“If you're as innocent as you say, then why not let us deliver your message, for a price,” Stone suggested.

I wasn't an idiot, and from what I learned from Bitter Tea, whoring myself out was no guarantee that I would get what I want. Also, this was Stone Spear and Rock Thrower, the two idiots who do nothing but talk about themselves. Even if they managed to remember my request, it wasn't as if anypony would even care what they had to say. All they wanted to do was fuck the bouncer who had roughed them up a few times and brag about it. No way I could trust them to do anything more than that.

Rock Throw smiled again. “Maybe you can bring that other mare with you. The pink one.”

“I said FUCK OFF!” I shouted and struck the fence with my hoof. Rock tried to jump away and fell on his butt.

“You're asking for a beating. You know that?” he snarled at me from the ground.

“No, she isn't,” Spritz Cookie's low voice came from behind me. “But you are."

The imposing mare stood over me, glaring down at the two stallions.

They both looked at each other before huffing and trotting away.

Stepping away from the fence, I glared at Spritz. “I didn’t ask for your help.”

She just smiled, her teeth too white to be natural. “Just think of it as a freebie.”

Like Tartarus was I going to believe that. “One, there is no such thing as a freebie. Two, I thought all you tin cans had metal for teeth, not ivory.”

Now she had a smug smile as she said, “Unlike the rest of you savages, I actually take care of my body. Now go fuck off, and please do remember that I helped you.” She was a tin can through and through, thinking herself my better just because she followed some code that told her she was better than everypony else.

I didn’t want trouble just yet, so I left, feeling her eyes on me as I trotted away. I didn’t know what Spritz was thinking, but I didn't think I'd like it at all.

Once I'd gotten away from the trouble I didn’t want to get into, I made my way to the trouble I did want to get into. The inside of the showers was like any other wasteland ruin. It was filled with cracks and rust. Inside were several ponies mulling around and a few others huddled up next to the far wall.

A hoof reached out to stop me. The larger stallion eyeed me up before saying, “You’re one of Spritz’s bitches.”

I pushed his hoof off me. “I ain’t nopony's bitch!”

He growled at me, teeth clenched and legs tightened. This dumbass was already looking for a fight.

“Oy, no brawling if you want your dick wet!” Cherry Knot called out from one of the shower stalls. Her face then brightened up as she saw me. She hopped out. “So you came, Star! Come in, come in.”

I strutted past the stallion and turned my attention to Cherry. The mare looked tired but lively. “Dare I ask what you were just doing?”

She rolled her eyes. “I ain't sucking dick yet, just smoking a drag. And, no, I ain't sharing.”

“I wasn't fucking asking, whore,” I spat back at her.

Cherry smiled. “Oh, I do like you.”

As I got closer, I saw that the ponies who were huddled together were playing a game of dice. The pieces were made from limestone that was almost too well-crafted. They were betting cigarettes.

“I thought you said you couldn't get any smokes here?” I asked.

Railway poked her head up from the huddle. “We didn’t say we ran out, or that we didn’t have our own stash... Cunt.”

That was two of my new gang friends. I looked around for the third one, only to hear a moan from the other side of the showers.

“Don’t tell me,” I groaned with a sigh.

Cherry chuckled. “Bitter really needed her smoke, so she bet her body for one. Bitch lost, obviously.”

I facehoofed. “Why is this prison mixed in the first place?”

She bumped my flank as though we were close friends and fluttered her eyelashes at me. “You could join her. It would help build some trust with us.”

I pushed her face away from mine. “I already told NCR’s Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Dumber that I’m not a whore. Not going to start now for a cig.”

Cherry shrugged. “You do you. Just don’t be a bitch about it, 'kay?”

Nodding, I trotted over to an empty spot in the shower room and watched the other inmates gamble. I wasn't going to play, mostly because I didn’t want to bet my body like Bitter, but also because I knew the house always wins and ponies like this will lose even if they win.

Not surprisingly, the game was street craps with the inmates betting for or against whoever was rolling the dice. Cigarettes changed hooves almost non-stop as they threw down bets in the form of carved chips of limestone.

As I watched, Bitter Tea trotted out with a cigarette and two stallions.

At least she got what she wanted.

Bitter got Cherry to help light her cigarette before trotting over to me. She puffed on her stick with a satisfied look on her face.

“You really like sucking, don’t you?” I said to the zebra.

“Fuck—” She took a long drag from her cigarette. “—off, bitch.” Smoke left her mouth and nose like it was some sort of spell. It was also thicker than cigarette smoke should be, and it smelled very odd.

“Alright, what the fuck are you even smoking there?” I asked.

She took another long drag, holding it in for a few seconds before slowly letting out the thick smoke. “We used a bit of the black powder to make a mild chem to add to our smoke. Not the best high, but it gets the job done. Just be careful who you get yours from; if the mix is bad, it'll explode.”

Fucking zebras and their alchemy brahmin shit.

Bitter Tea held the cigarette out to me. “Smoke it. Then we can talk.”

If she was willing to get fucked to have it, I figured there could be worse things.

I sucked in the acrid smoke and held it in as I passed the cigarette back before slowly letting it out. The thick smoke escaped through my mouth and nose. It was… bad. The rush of tabacco was there as well as some other chem. It made me feel good, but fuck did it taste bad. Worse than sucking on rotting rubber bands and burnt shit.

Once it was out of my lungs, I sucked in a deep breath of the stagnant air. “I know why,” I finally got out. “But still… why?”

Bitter Tea just laughed as she puffed on the thing again.

My head started feeling light and I had to sit down for a moment. It felt like I was drunk, or high, or both and more. It was nothing real potent, but the rush still took me by surprise. Then, as soon as it started, the chem passed.

“Alright, I get it now,” I said as I got to my hooves again.

Looking around, Bitter Tea made sure the other ponies were distracted before talking softly. “Now I know that pencil dick snitch Cattle Prod did put you up to being buddy-buddy with Spritz, but you all ask too many questions and seem to have Spritz’s interests in mind if you're not up to anything. Now talk or fuck off.”

Leaving was an option to keep the whole plan secret. But, like with Spritz driving off those two idiots, Bitter had shared her cig with me, and now she expected me to pay her back. Leaving only meant she'd find some other way to make me pay up.

I did believe in Harp's plan. The mare was a good thinker. She’s crafty and she knew when to be ruthless, but I couldn't help but feel like she was too much out of her element here. Dealing with raiders was easy; there was no negotiation, no mercy—you kill them or they kill you. Here, it was a den of pissed-off gangers.

“Alright, alright, I’ll let you in on what we're up to, but if it gets out, even a little, I will gut you with my teeth.” Smiling, I made sure to show her my overgrown fang as I looked into her eyes. “Understand?”

Bitter gave me an annoyed look. The kind that told me she could not be threatened so easily, but as she locked eyes with me, I trapped her with my evil eyes. Only a little bit of fear, just enough to get the message across and to not put any strain on myself.

Releasing her, Bitter gave a quick shiver, taking her time to respond as she took a long drag of her cigarette.

“Alright, my lips stay tight. I’m no open legged bitch,” she responded.

Taking a deep breath and speaking softly, I began my explanation. “We're planning on getting out of this shithole. Unlike you all, we don’t have the luxury of working off our brahmin shit sentence. Long story short, Harp is really valuable to some nasty ponies who do nasty things. We told Spritz that the NCR plans on taking our PipBuck in the hope she would help us get out before that happens… hopefully before those nasty ponies show up.”

Bitter nodded and took a moment to think before responding. “That’s risky business,” she said. “Real risky business. But you just gave us a countdown.”

“Countdown?” I asked.

“To when Spritz makes her move,” she said in a whisper. “The bitch is clearly up to some mad shit. The pony we got faking as her cunt licker is sure she's been having her zealots sneak black powder out.”

A concerned look formed on Bitter's face before she continued. “We're sure if she is successful, she will take over and ice any pony who does not side with her. We non-ponies are not included in her gang, so we're all dead if she takes charge.”

“Could you warn the warden?” I asked a dumb question.

Bitter rolled her eyes. “I ain’t no fucking snitch, nor is anypony with us. When she makes her move, we will fight. We just need to know when it happens to keep her from catching us off guard.”

Deciding to get to why I was here, I asked, “Then would you be willing to help us, even if Spritz is in on the plan?”

Bitter scratched her chin. An unsure look formedon her face. “Well we could, but that’s like helping a radscorpion cross a river. Yeah, you both will get to the other side, but the radscorpion will still kill you. Naw, we got our own plans. We’re letting Spritz do the work and legging the fuck out when she does. No fucking way we're sticking our necks out for that bitch. You get it?”

I sighed, knowing I was not going to convince them. “Ya, I get it. I actually bet that Spritz will just kill us for our PipBucks once she is free. Personally, I’d like to get the fuck out and leave her to fucking rot in this shit hole.”

Finishing her cigarette, Bitter chucked it into a dirty sink. “I can see that too. Tin cans like her kill for a fucking busted toaster. Now you want to play a game? Another smoke is in it for you if ya win.”

Shaking my head, I watched as Bitter joined in the game of craps.

Railway Spike, on the other hoof, had left the game. He had won a few cigarettes but was now dealing with two stallions looming over her.

“Fuck off. I got my drags so I’m done playing, and I ain’t giving ya half!” she growled at the two stallions.

Trotting over, I got in between the conflict, my bouncer instinct flying up. “Hey now, we can't have sore losers making a fuss. There is always tomorrow to win.”

One of the stallions cracked his neck. “Ain't your business, cunt.”

I looked over at Railway Spike who seemed ready for a fight and looked more than capable of doing damage. Though it would be fun to see the gangers fight it out, I had not given up on getting their help and having them kill each other right now was not in any plan I had.

“It’s my business now, so if you want to shake my friend down, you’re going to have to get through me first,” I warned them.

They smiled, clearly liking the odds.

They also didn’t expect me to use my evil eye. Just for a moment. Just a flash of fear. That's all.

Their confidence then suddenly dropped as they looked more unsure, so I declined to drive home the warning. “Just so you know, before I was locked up here, I was a bouncer for a very popular joint. A good day was when I could legally break a pony's leg. Two if they touched one of the working mares wrong. Here, I don’t think anypony cares about what is legal or not, so go back to your game and try to win.”

The two glared at me, but ultimately returned to the dice game.

Railway laughed in amusement. “Not bad, ya cunt. Here I was thinking I might have to lose a tooth to keep my cigs. So what’s ya game?”

I shrugged. “Nothing yet.Just making sure you owe me.”

She clicked her tongue at me. “Don’t go expecting me to jump over dicks to pay back that favor. You're still new. Your rep is still brahmin shit. Got that bitch?”

“Ya, ya. I get how this works. No different from where I was born,” I told her. “I might as well’ve thumped them 'ard if this here's 'ow you’re goin' to say thanks.”

Railway cocked an eyebrow at me before sitting back. “Well, ya gotta do more than stop a fight; like sing us one of those songs. You know. That weird one you sang in the quarry.”

I flashed her a smile. “Ah, you mean one of the songs from my home. I know a lot of them. Mom didn’t let me sing most of them to my daughter. 'Too violent,' she said.”

“Alright, let's hear one. Something fun,” Railway encouraged as she put a cigarette in her mouth. Cherry Knot trotted over to light it.

“A fun one... Ya, I know one. The port ponies love to sing this one to piss off the sailors.” I then cleared my throat, ready to sing.

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Flintlock Hook gained a day, the scourge of the seven seas.

Oh! Flintlock Hook gained a day, achieving victory through blood and fear.