Bearer of Misfortune

by Kitsunin

Rating: everyone
Tags: Discord, Princess Celestia, Sad, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 5898

Discord retells the story of his life, from when he was a colt to the present.

Discord retells the story of his life, beginning from when he was just a young colt. How he used to be a friend to Celestia and Luna, and how he came to become the chaotic being he is now. What could have happened to change him so from the normal pony he once was?
Due to be part one of the trilogy The Curse

Image taken from Discordantly, which is awesome, by the way.

Published 2011-12-19 15:03:01 UTC
Last updated 2011-12-30 07:06:03 UTC

Manehattan

Many thousands of years ago I was just a normal earth colt. I was happy, and my parents, though poor, raised me well. We had little: only a single grungy room with a bed and a chair. The bed was my parents' and the chair was mine. I was quite attached to that chair; it might sound strange that a chair would be something a kid would like, but we had very little else. The chair was hinged in the strangest way; I would often lean so it would go almost completely back, leaving my head upside-down and my hooves to grip the arms. I would pretend it was some sort of flying machine, or just that I was a pegasus flying through the sky: I suppose having the blood rush to my head made it easier.

As much as my parents made our unfortunate position tolerable, it wasn't something that would last. As I began to grow, I became bored with the small amounts of stimulation that my parents and the few things around the house could provide, and I began to wander from our home. We lived in a slum, and there were mostly alleyways nearby. I did not dare go to the main street, although it was nearby, for it was not considered couth for a poor pony to get in the way of the better off. Nonetheless, one day when I was on a side street off from the main one, I found myself confronted by a woman.

She was loud and obnoxious, telling me to go home and wash up, never mind that we didn't even have running water in our home. I told her to get lost, but she somehow took that as a threat. She began screeching, calling for help, even though the worst I had done was give her a nasty look. At the time I was much too young to appear as a threat to anyone, but that didn't stop her from acting as though her life were in danger from me, a colt a third her size. A pair of guards came, responding to her call. They accused me of threatening her, and when I denied that, they said that it was not legal for a colt to be alone in the city anyway. One tried to grab me, but was intercepted by my parents, who jumped in from another alley. They began shouting at the guards, telling them that I hadn't done anything and that I wasn't alone. I thought that was all my parents had done, but they may have been more violent than that: I was young at the time, and picturing my parents as doing anything wrong seemed impossible.

The guards grabbed my parents, angered by what at the time I had thought was only their presence. My parents struggled, but the guards were much stronger. My parents shouted at me, telling me to go home. They said that they would be back soon, and with the guards looking so threatening, I listened. I bolted from the scene, the woman screeching at the guards, saying I was getting away, although the guards already had their hands too full to try to catch me.

At home I sat for a while, waiting. The entire day passed, but my parents didn't come back. A week longer I waited, making trips outside to scavenge food from the nearby dumpsters, yet still my parents didn't come home. I couldn't understand it, they had said they would be back soon, why would they lie about that? Soon, I had lost track of the days, not that I cared too much for time at my age.

Not more than a couple weeks later, someone knocked on the door. I tried to ignore it, but when it didn't stop, I answered. The stallion who was at the door, I recall my parents saying was our landlord, and he let us live where we did. When he saw that I had answered, anxiety appeared on his face. When I asked what was wrong, he said he was sorry, but we couldn't live in this apartment anymore. He told me to wait outside, and when my parents got home, to tell them that they needed to pay the rent.

Well, I waited in front of the house for the rest of the day, unable to think of anything to do but listen to what I had been told. When night came, I realized that there wasn't any reason my parents would show up now if they hadn't before, so I wandered off and found myself a place to sleep behind a dumpster. That was the place I slept for the rest of my stay in Manehattan.

Time passed, and I became older. I was still quite young, but no less than thirteen years of age. I suppose I was lucky to have been able to fend for myself as well as I did, with my parents being gone. I ate little, but enough to survive; things didn't seem to me as miserable as they might sound.

One day, there was a great procession going down the main street. Many ponies were gathered to watch, and it piqued my interest. Normally these would have been exactly the sort of events I would avoid, but something about it seemed so grand that I simply could not stay away. I shoved my way to the front of the crowd, ignoring the ponies who shouted at me for being so disgusting; as I was, naturally, since I could only bathe when it rained.

Leading the procession was a carriage with two Alicorns, apparently the rulers of Equestria; they were quite an impressive sight, with their bright colors and mystically flowing manes. They were not what I found most interesting however, for standing proudly atop the carriage was a much younger Alicorn; their daughter, I presumed. She had the brightest smile I had ever seen; in fact, it was one of the only carefree smiles I had ever seen.

Soon the carriage was passing me; I simply could not let it escape! I pushed through the crowd, trying to catch it again. Shouts of disapproval surrounded me from the ponies I had to shove aside in order to keep up. As I finally came to the carriage's side, I looked up at the filly. She was looking right back at me and giggling. It was such a wonderful feeling, and I wished I had the energy to stay beside her, but I didn't. I took a moment to catch my breath and found that, not only was the carriage getting away, but guards were coming at me. I slipped into an alley, taking advantage of my small size to slip behind a garbage bin.

I waited some time and it seemed that the guards had failed to follow. As the relief wore off, I thought of that carriage, or more specifically, the young mare who rode on top of it. I wished that I had followed further, but now it was gone, and I might never see her again.

In my youthful naivete, I figured that I could just go where they had come from and meet her again. I suppose at the time I just wanted something to aim for, and for once it felt like I could have some control over something.

While I grew up in Manehattan, by this point I had no attachment to it. The only ponies I knew were my parents, and they were gone. Actually, I believe they were part of the reason I left. They were taken by royal guards, so I figured they might have been taken to Canterlot, giving me another unrealistic, but in my young mind, powerful, reason to leave. So it was that I decided to leave my old home completely. I was now going on a journey to the most amazing city in all of Equestria, to visit the royalty that ran all of the land.

Canterlot

After a day's travel, while I was sleeping by the road, I was awakened by an older couple. They offered to take me with them to Ponyville. They said they knew some ponies who would be glad to give me a home, but I turned their offer down, blinded by my goal of reaching Canterlot. The couple still gave me some food they had taken for their trip before moving on, and it was amazing; compared to the trash I had been eating for a while, at least.

By the end of a second day of traveling I had reached Canterlot. The sight left me in awe, the pastel pinks and blues, the rounded shapes and tall spires so unlike the simple, drably colored, square buildings Manehattan consisted of. I so wished I could just enter and live there like the upper class ponies, but even approaching the city I could feel the disgusted stares of the wealthy citizens. I skirted around the main areas, wanting to avoid causing any trouble, and found that, like any other city, Canterlot contained many slums. These were the places the ponies that catered to its wealthier inhabitants lived, and though the slums were better hidden than in other cities; there were more of them, and the way the poorer ponies were treated by the upper class was worse.

At the rear of the city was the great castle that the King and Queen ruled from within. Although it was difficult for me to see from my position on the opposite side of the moat that surrounded it, the spires that peeked over the top of the surrounding wall gave the impression that it must have been even grander than the rest of Canterlot. My goal was to make my way within that castle, but I hadn't even considered that it wouldn't be a place just anyone could enter. There was only a single obvious entrance, that being the bridge across the moat, and it was much too easy to guard to be a viable option to sneak through.

It was too late in the day to do anything more, so I needed to find a place to sleep. Rather than heading back into town, I found a small garden on the city's side of the moat. I settled upon the inside of a bush for my sleeping location: I was small enough to fit within entirely, mostly concealed, and was even able to use some of the leaves as a pillow of sorts.

Canterlot was now my home, and, practically speaking, it wasn’t much of a change. Finding food was a bit trickier than it was back in Manehattan, due to the lack of a middle class, who were the types of people most likely to throw food out into easily accessible places; however, the wealthy here generally threw more and better foods out, it was simply harder to know where to look.

Whatever excess time I had, I spent trying to find a way into the castle’s complex. The castle was quite well guarded, and while there was no way to get inside without crossing the water, the waterfalls that formed the moat had much less of a current than the moat itself did. It didn’t take too long for me to figure out that it would be possible, with some careful footwork, to cross by jumping across the boulders that broke the waterfall’s path. When I tried this, I was pleased to find that there was an opening, not more than a few inches larger than my own size, where one could squeeze around the building portion of the gate. While it would seem as though the entrance was unnoticed, there were still guards watching the area it came out into, perhaps guarding a particularly important building within the complex.

I spent some time trying to find another way in, but eventually it became apparent that there was only the one way other than the front gate, I was becoming worried that in the end I would not be able to get beyond the outer wall. Fortunately, with a few weeks of conviction, I discovered that on a single day of the week, when the night shift guards replace the others, there were a few moments during which the guards watching the entrance I found were gone. The problem I now had was that, once I entered, I would not be able to leave again until a week’s time had passed. I figured that would be an issue I could deal with once I was already inside.

I spent the next day gathering extra food, which I packed into a big paper bag I had found in somepony’s trash. I was finally almost ready to do what I had come to Canterlot to do in the first place, my mind had not changed in the slightest. I set out to find one last meal to eat, so I could wait as long as possible before needing to dip into the food I packed. Now, fully prepared, I made my way back across the rocks to the other side of the moat. I squeezed my way through the crevice and around the wall. Now, from my position in the shadows, I would just have to wait until the guards were gone.

Time dragged on, I was becoming anxious. Had I chosen the one week the guards would have their timing correct? What if the guards decided to look more closely into the shadows this time? I couldn’t quit now, as the bag I brought with me was in such a position that if I tried to move backwards it would rub against the wall, and if luck was against me, crinkle. I wouldn’t be able to back out quickly enough to avoid notice, and even if they didn’t send guards to catch me on the other side, they would certainly realize the flaw their security had. I had waited here for this long before; when I discovered the break that I was now trying to take advantage of, but now the excitement and anxiety that I was finally putting my plans into action made it much more difficult.

One of the guards looked up, then, slightly surprised, turned to whisper something to his comrade. They both wandered off, leaving the space unguarded, and myself able to finally slip inside. I found myself in an open area, the area not taken by the cliff face occupied by two towers, even more dazzlingly designed than those in the city, now utilizing golds and purples in all sorts of minimalistic patterns, with well placed flourishes of contrasting reds and greens. Two paths led away from my location, not counting the crevice I had come from, which was hidden between one of the towers and the mountainside. One of the paths, the one the guards took, went between the two towers and in the direction of the gate. The path which I took, not wishing to bump into the guards’ replacements, lead further along the mountainside, slipping around the majority of the occupied areas.

The path continued to grip the rocky wall, the other edge blocked by the walls of the buildings within the castle. There were occasional openings where branches lead off into a fancier path made for the usage of visitors. For now though I wanted to avoid being seen, so I continued along the same path; I assumed it to be built for the servants, judging by its simplicity and the way it was hidden away from the rest of the castle. A couple of times the servants actually saw me, but they didn’t seem to care; they must not know one another well enough to be able to tell an intruder apart.

As I began to pass the main palace, I considered what I could possibly do. At this point I was just being a stalker, I was willing to admit it. It did not matter though as it was too late to change my mind, so what would be the best way to meet the princess? I couldn’t just go to her room: there was no way that would end well. I needed some way that felt natural, but in what way does a princess meet a commoner? Perhaps I could dress up as a servant and happen to bump into her, but no, that would just be too weird, really difficult to pull off, too.

In the end I decided that I would just happen to meet her as I am, and hope for the best. Maybe she would even remember me out of that crowd. I knew it was highly unlikely that a princess would listen to anything I had to say, but messing too much with the circumstances felt wrong to me. If everything turned out well, I would need to explain to her what I was doing here, after all.

The rocky wall began to bend away, the mountain range pulling back and away from the point that Canterlot was built upon. The path I had been walking on began curving to the left, away from the mountainside. Rather than continuing to circle around the entirety of the castle, the servant’s walkway was now passing in front of the castle’s garden.

Rather than continue along the path, which seemed to be leading further into the main area of the castle; I decided to head into the garden. It was late anyways, I needed a place to sleep, and what could be better concealed than within a heavily foliaged tree?

The garden was such a serene place, so at odds with the cities I had always lived in: even the small home my family lived within was always pervaded by noises from the other families that lived in the same single room so-called homes. I found myself becoming very tired. I had succeeded in the first part of my task. Now that I was within the castle, tomorrow, just maybe, I could speak with the princess.

Meetings

Morning light shone through the leaves of the tree I had chosen. For a moment I tried to continue to sleep, hesitant to begin another boring day. A moment later the realization of where I was ran through my mind, and the excitement brought me to waking in an instant. I dropped out of the tree I had chosen to sleep within, landing clumsily and toppling over; I was not enough of an acrobat to be sleeping in trees.

This was it, today I would meet the princess. I wasn’t sure what I expected to accomplish, but I had a faint hope that maybe I could feel carefree in the way she was when I first saw her. The garden was still so calm...it felt like I was in a new era of my life; one without the chaos and sadness that I was surrounded by in the city.

I took a sandwich out of the bag of food I had brought. I had found a good haul of food the other day, with a surprising amount of wholly uneaten foods. It wouldn’t last more than a day or two, but hopefully that would be long enough to find somewhere in the castle to smuggle food from. I stashed the bag in a nearby bush, preparing to continue searching the castle. The garden could be my home base: it was quite large, contained plenty of hiding places, and appeared to be largely unused.

So now, where might the princess be? I had no idea what sort of schedule royalty, particularly young royalty, might have, and the castle was such a huge complex. It wasn’t used much outside of special events though, so it would probably be easy enough to avoid notice.

There would be a week before I could leave again, so I had all the time I needed. I could just scout the place out today if I had to; I hated to think that though, the anxiety was so strong that another day of waiting seemed impossible. I left the garden, heading back onto the path I had been using yesterday. Today I would take it the rest of the way around the castle, and work out what all of the buildings were; later I could use that knowledge to have a bit more informed plan.

After just a short period spent walking, I saw a group of wealthy ponies. They were conversing, waiting outside of a particularly large building. They were within the main area, and the servants’ path was still slipping by, mostly hidden. As I continued on, it became apparent that something was wrong; during the time I had been trying to get into the castle I found that usually only a few ponies would enter on any given day. Today, however, there were many ponies; there must have been some sort of event going on, if only I had a way of telling what day it was.

I couldn’t go to any of the main areas: with my disheveled appearance I would stick out too much and surely be kicked out. The population of the castle was becoming too much, and only more ponies would arrive. I would eventually be found if I didn’t go somewhere more concealed. I turned around, heading back to the garden. I accepted that I would just have to wait a bit longer before I could get this over with.

As I hoped, the garden was still deserted. I couldn’t say for sure that it wouldn’t fill up as more ponies arrived; if it did, it would be quite a pain. I think I could hide well enough, the garden was quite big, but it would still be risky.

I entered the clearing I had stashed my bag within, and was surprised to find it was not entirely unoccupied. There was a young white mare riffling through the contents of the bag. Her pastel colored mane and combination of wings and horn made her immediately recognizable. It was incredible luck, yet didn’t feel like it at all. I wanted time to prepare, to think of just what I wanted to say. I realized that perhaps it was best, this was a more natural situation than I could ever conceive. “A-ah, hello?” I managed to say.

She quickly turned, kicking the bag away in an obvious attempt to hide that she had been bothering with it. “Hey!” she blurted out. When she saw me she sighed, calming down. “Oh, you’re not...?” she trailed off, looking at me suspiciously, “are you a servant? I swear I recognize you from somewhere.” she said, leaning in towards me.

“Uh...” I said, “well, no. Actually—”

“Well you certainly aren’t a guest. How very interesting.” she interrupted.

“I sort of...um.” I couldn’t just tell her I snuck in, could I? She appeared to be the sort of pony who might actually find such a thing exciting, but there was no guarantee.

“I bet you snuck in!” she said conspiratorially, “you wanted to meet the royal princess, so you snuck into the castle.”

That was exactly what I did, and exactly the reason I did it, but I knew she wasn’t serious when she said that. Nonetheless, I decided to roll with it. “That is exactly why I’m here!” I said.

Her eyes lit up as she laughed. “Of course! So what’s your name?”

“I’m...Diz,” I said. My parents were foreign ponies. Where they came from, rather than using words for a name, and shortening them into a more speakable nickname; they just started with a short name. That meant most names didn’t have much meaning other than what the parents liked the sound of, however.

“Dis,” she said. She couldn’t pronounce the Z sound, so it came out as an S instead; something that I found quite endearing. “Is that short for something?”

“Nope, just Diz. Weird, I know.”

“It’s very unique! I’ve never heard a name that didn’t have some sort of meaning before. I’m Celestia, by the way...but you probably already knew that.”

I laughed. “Of course: if I came here to meet you, then how could I not know who you are?”

Celestia shot me with a suspicious glance, but visibly shook the feeling away. “But call me ‘Tia!” she paused, her face forming an irritated expression, “eh, sorry, but I can’t stick around: I snuck away from my parents, and I’m supposed to be greeting the so called important ponies with them today.”

“Oh, well, um...” I wanted to say something else, but nothing came to mind, “...bye.”

She began walking away. “I hope I can see you again sometime!” she called back, “back here sound good?”

“Sounds great!” I called after her, grinning. Before she went out of my vision I noticed her posture become more coordinated; the amount of contrast between it then and when we were speaking was immense. I assumed that she had been much less inhibited around me than she normally was; she was royalty, after all.

That had gone far better than I could have possibly hoped. I still did not have the slightest clue what she thought of me, it was especially odd that she wouldn’t press for further information beyond my ‘jokes’. Regardless, the tough part was over, now I could just wait. Living in the castle would be much easier than any city, at least, if I could find somewhere to get food from. I fetched my bag of food, its contents had been mushed somewhat from Celestia’s examination; it was still perfectly edible though: a bit of crushing wouldn’t ruin food that had already been found in a dumpster.

I climbed back up into the tree that I had slept in last night. This time around, since I was in no hurry, I searched around for a little bit. At the present the tree was not bearing any sort of seeds, so I couldn’t tell what type of tree it was. I was able to find a very nice, concealed spot in the crown, perfect for laying and sitting in. For the rest of the day, I watched the nearby goings on from my perch in the top of the tree.

The next day I was able to locate the castle’s kitchen, and, luckily for me, there was even a big dumpster that they used specifically for foods. A brief rummage through it found that it contained mostly ingredients that had been thrown out, either because they were excess or they had gone bad. By my standards it was all still edible, but I really had hoped to find something of a little higher quality. Maybe some extra uneaten food prepared for the royals. With my luck looking up I was starting to become a bit greedy, expecting things only to get better.

Still another few days passed uneventfully. By now, I had worked out what most of the buildings were, including the lodgings of the royal family. Unfortunately the majority of the goings on were inside of the buildings, and I was not going to risk going indoors. I had not seen any of the royal family during this time, it seemed odd that I would never have seen them go outdoors in all this time. It was bad luck, I suppose; that, or they actually never did go outside. I was starting to become a bit impatient, but Celestia had said she would meet me in the garden, and I had no reason to doubt that. She was busy, I was sure.

One night while I was sleeping I was awakened by an unfamiliar voice. “I know you’re around here somewhere!” it called. I tried to ignore the mare whom it belonged to, hoping she would go away, but she didn’t. “Come on out, seriously!” she continued, in a slightly exasperated tone. This time it was from directly beneath the tree I was in.

I peeked out from my nest, looking below. The young mare appeared to be hiding a feeling of distress, but also...I could not believe what I was seeing. She appeared to have both wings and a horn, just like Celestia. It was common knowledge that the king, queen, and their daughter were the only alicorns in Equestria, yet somehow not only was there a fourth alicorn, but I of all ponies was seeing her.

A branch rustled, not from me, but from a bird flying from somewhere else. It didn’t matter though, as it still caused the Alicorn to glance up. “You’re...in the tree?” she wondered aloud, “look, I guess I can’t blame you for hiding, but there’s no need to worry. I’m perfectly okay with weirdos like you living in the castle.”

I gave her a confused look, beginning to make my way down from the tree. “Um, who are you?” I asked, “I-I thought there were only the three alicorns.” I slid down onto one of the lowest branches, now I would just have to jump out without screwing up like I so often did.

“Those would be Celestia and her parents? Well, I’m the fourth, their other daughter: Luna.”

“But...I thought they only had one daughter.” I leaped down and once again my knees buckled underneath me, causing me to collapse pathetically, groaning.

Luna giggled, making me even more embarrassed. She quickly became serious, though. “No, I am the second, but they were supposed to only have one, and if it were known that they had a second...well, apparently it would cause problems, so I don’t get to go out much.”

“Huh...that’s kind of sad, I guess.” I said, standing up.

“You guess? Almost nopony even knows I exist and you’re saying it’s just kind ofsad?” she said. Her words indicated more offense than her voice’s tone did; rather, she actually sounded curious. “Like...you know what it’s like?”

“I can’t say I know what it’s like to be ignored. It seems to me the less attention the better,” I said, recalling all the problems other ponies had caused for me. My parents being taken away by guards, my home being taken away by the landlord, then all the hatred directed at me for being lower class...it would have been nice if others weren’t so necessary for survival. Still, there were moments, like then, when the presence of others didn’t seem to be such a negative thing. “At the very least, I would rather no attention than bad attention,” I added.

Luna appeared thoughtful. “I disagree with you there, I think I would rather any sort of attention myself. I think it would quickly become unbearable if I didn’t know anyone at all.”

“Well, I suppose that isn’t something I would want to find out.” I did not really see any reason to think about it beyond that.

“Your thoughts are quite interesting, but I suppose before talking about these types of things we should get to know one another a bit better,” she said. Something struck me as a bit odd. Talking about these things she was speaking in an almost entirely different way than she was at first. Perhaps that was the difference between formal and informal speech for someone with a royal education. “My sister said she met you here, it sounded very interesting. I suppose you stay here, in the castle?” she asked, “You are Dis, right?”

“Um, n...” I paused, I actually somewhat preferred being called Dis to Diz. There was not much of a difference, sure, but Diz was a name that I had only bad thoughts of. My parents even rarely called me by it, preferring to simply call me ‘son’; I think it was because of their foreign accent. “...Yeah, that’s me,” I continued, “and, well...pretty much. There’s not much of anywhere else for me to be, and, weird as it might make me; it feels like at least it’s something to do. Otherwise I would just be in the city, surviving,” I explained, “but what about you? Do you really stay in the castle all the time?”

Luna looked down. “Well...I’ve never left, and everyone I know lives in the castle. Unfortunately, with a few exceptions, most servants don’t work here forever, so I can’t make many friends. It’s not exactly easy to hide a horn or wings, which means I don’t get to meet anyone my family doesn’t really trust.”

“So then, why are you speaking to me?” I asked, “only one who knows me is Celestia, and even she just barely.”

“Well, I haven’t received permission to speak with you. My sister was telling me about the odd pony she met in the garden. She seemed to think you were quite interesting, so I thought I would visit. After all, you’re not somepony anypony would take seriously if you did say there was a fourth alicorn, no offense.”

“None taken, I’m willing to admit that I’m kind of...” I paused, considering how very strange it was that a pony in such a poor position could still somehow be meeting such important ponies. “...weird. It has a lot to do with luck though, you know.”

“I’m sure it does, but surely it took guts to actually sneak in here; guts, and a very strange sense of priorities.” she said. Her coat began to brighten just a bit, morphing from the black she had appeared to be in the darkness of the night into a deep blue. I turned my head, seeing the sky beginning to light up from the rising sun. Luna now looked a bit anxious, she turned away from me. “Sorry, but I have to go now. Everyone wakes up very shortly after first light, and I shouldn’t be gone when they do,” she said to me, trotting away without even first waiting for a response.

“Um...goodbye then,” I said, awkwardly looking about. I wasn’t sure whether meeting Luna was more or less strange than meeting Celestia. Luna did not give me the same strong impression that Celestia did, she felt more normal, like someone who would make a good friend maybe. Celestia on the other hand was made to be royalty, being within her presence alone invoked a feeling of awe. It was odd though, that Celestia would make more of an impression on me, as Luna’s personality was much stronger; not only that, but I was one of the only ponies who even knew the royal family had a second daughter, much less actually met her.

It felt almost surreal the way the things that were happening now seemed simply to be a part of life. It felt like there had to be some sort of conflict, some goal to have, but there just wasn’t. I had been drawn to meet Celestia, and that was as far as I had thought. Now I would only need to stick around and see where this took me. I did not really see where it could lead though...if I became a friend of the princesses’, what could happen after that? It was difficult to say whether it would be appropriate to be excited about the possibilities, or if perhaps it would just end there and things would continue on as they had been.