You'll Never Know

Applejack stood trembling as she stared up into the unforgiving glare of the Royal Guard of the Crystalline Castle. Her ears were pinned back as the stallion towered over her. A Unicorn in Crystalline armor, he stood twice as tall as any she had witnessed in Ponyville. His fur was blacker than the darkest night while his eyes radiated with a strong white light. His pupils were colorless and his face bore no expression.

She couldn’t stop quaking in his presence, as the very essence of fear seemed to flow from within him. In his hoof was a spear that stood almost a head taller than him. The shaft was constructed of a wood; Applejack had never seen, while the metal of the tip glowed with a mystical energy.

Applejack couldn’t help but feel if he so wished, he could take her very life before a second passed. And still he stood there, silent yet glaring daggers into her very soul; as though he could see into the core of her being.

***

Applebloom stared at her big sister incredulously; giggling. “Yore tellin’ me, you; th’ Iron Pony of Equestria was afraid of some stallion? An’ a Unicorn at that?”

Applejack gave a nervous chuckle. “That’s right, Sugarcube. But tha’ were no ordinary Unicorn. Ah wouldn’t find out till later, but tha’ weren’t a Pony at all.”

Applebloom stopped her laughing. “Wait, what?”

“Yeah. Th’ Royal Guard may look like Ponies and even move like ‘em. However, they come from another realm an’ harbor unspeakable powers; though possess only a fraction of th’ ones they protect. Cadence told meh they’re known as Angels. Even at mah strongest, Ah’d be no match fer one.”

“Yikes, that’s uh, one heck ofa..Hmm..So whatcha do?”

Her big sister just laughed. “Well, much as Ah would luv ta tell ya how Ah completely handed the guard’s helmet to ‘im, Ah wasn’t able ta even move, much less fight. Truth be told, Sugarcube, ah didn’t do nothin’.”

“Well ya had to get past ‘im to talk to the Princess, right?”

“Like Ah just said, Ah didn’t do nothin’, ya see…”

***

Applejack couldn’t help it. The feeling the guard before her was exerting was one of sheer dread. She felt hopeless; there was simply no other way to describe it; in her path was an obstacle that she could never hope to move. Just as she was about to give in and admit defeat, the big door to the castle opened up and out stepped the graceful form of Princess Cadence; Goddess of the Lovesong.

The Alicorn regally sauntered from the doorway; her multi-colored mane swaying with her steps. Stopping just in front of the guard, she spoke in a soft, almost disappointed-sounding voice. “Don’t you ‘Your Majesty’ me, what’s with all the yelling?”

Applejack stared up in stunned silence at the Alicorn as she appeared to be listening to something. When she spoke, it was an almost scoffing voice. “An uninvited guest? Where?”

The guard lifted a hoof and pointed it towards Applejack. Turning to look at her, the Alicorn gave AJ a secret wink before turning back to the guard. “That’s my next appointment.”

Again there was silence. “No, I am not joking, go ahead look it up on that clipboard of yours if you don’t believe me. And when you see her name you’ll be pulling double shifts. Go ahead, let’s roll that dice. Applejack from Sweet Apple Acres, should be in the lunch date slot.”

Looking back at the guard, Applejack noticed a clipboard had appeared in his hooves, and the spear had vanished. Still it was completely silent. Cadence laughed before lowering her voice, shaking her head. “You shouldn’t blame her for your own ineptitude, child of my graces. You have only yourself to blame and yet there you stand, arguing with me. Tell me-”

The eyes of the Princess grew cold and her horn began to glow. “Since you seem so intent on arguing with your own mother; the reason for your continued existence, did you ask her, her name?”

After a moment of absolute silence, Cadence nodded. “You’ve disappointed me. For the next foreseeable future, you are grounded, young man. Head to the barracks and be sure to tell your brother; the Squad Captain, why mommy is upset at you. Go on.”

Turning her head to smile at Applejack, as the guard seemingly vanished, Cadence spoke warmly. “Come on in, it’s time for lunch after all. I’m sure you are quite hungry after your trip here.”

As Applejack followed Cadence silently through the doors, Cadence halted suddenly. Turning to look Applejack in the eye, she spoke in a sweet melodic voice. “Relax sweetie, I’m not crazy. Yes, I can hear what you are thinking, and no I wasn’t talking to myself. Angel voices can’t be heard by mortal ears-”

“Um Princess Ah-”

The eyes of the Goddess narrowed, as if in annoyance. Her tone still conveyed warmth but only just. “I don’t care for that title, little one. Princess-”

She scoffed, as though the very thought of it made her laugh. “It’s a cold and distant one, isn’t it? My aunts may prefer to distance themselves from our creations but I don’t. After all, what are you, but children of our magic’s grace? I would much rather spend time with my children. To watch you grow, to see your dreams; goals in life. I much prefer to actively guide and nurture you. Please just call me Cadence. No more Princess nonsense. Am I understood, my daughter?”

Applejack was suddenly filled with an indescribable sense of warmth; like the kind experienced once before in her mother’s hooves. Her next words were pure compulsion. “Y-yes Mama.”

Breaking into a smile, Cadence’s eyes twinkled knowingly and then spoke in a gentle voice. “That works too. From now on call me Mama. That’s a good girl. Now then, it’s time for lunch young lady. Go down the hall and wash your hooves.”

Letting out a playful giggle Cadence added. “I hope you like fresh Apple Cake. Though it may be a bit cold- The baker has been waiting to serve it for a while now. Let’s not keep the nice stallion waiting much longer. Off you go.”

It wasn’t long before Applejack found herself sitting next to Cadence at the royal banquet table. As she found herself lost in the wonders of an Apple-flavored cake, the divine goddess watched her silently. Sitting there, Cadence placed a hoof under her chin as she watched in amusement while Applejack licked the last crumb of cake from the plate. “How was it, sweetie?”

“Ah, have no words fer how amazin’ that was.”

Cadence nodded with a grin. “Glad you enjoyed it, not everyday a mortal gets to partake of the Golden Apples of Celestia’s Garden; truly a divine meal indeed. My Aunt Luna sent me some from the latest harvest and well...When I found out you were on your way to see me, I asked the baker to work his magic. I’ll let him know how you enjoyed his treat.”

She tilted her head slightly, and her eyes grew serious, though her warm smile never left her face.” Though that does lead me into why you’ve come. And before you ask, my darling child; yes. Yes; I do know why you are here, but it’s rather boring if I just give you the knowledge you seek, isn’t it? Humor me and tell Mama with your own lips; why have you come?”

***

“Weren’t ya scared, sis?”

Applejack nodded and gave a nervous giggle at the very memory. “You ‘ave no clue, just how scared Ah was, Sugarcube. Mah blood pulsed through mah veins, at a speed tha’ rivaled Rainbow’s. Ah was extremely scared. Ah had traveled th’ road of generations just ta get there. What if when Ah asked mah question, Ah got an answer Ah didn’ want?”

Applebloom wasn’t sure what to say to that; she was in the same position. After all, her sister said she liked mares, but as far as she could recall, Applejack had never pursued such an ideal. What if it really was forbidden? All she could do was ask in an almost squeaky voice. “So whatcha do, sis?”

“Well, what could Ah do, Applebloom? Digging deep, Ah had no choice but ta be ‘onest with ‘er and mahself. After all, she put meh on th’ spot and forced meh ta actually say it.”

***

“Ahm afraid Ah have a crush on a Pegasus that caught mah eye, yer-er- Mama.”

Cadence nodded and seemed pensive, with her voice reflecting her thoughts. “Tell me about this Pegasus, is there something particular about them that worries you?”

Applejack’s face adopted a worried expression but Cadence gently gave her a nudge. “You can do it, sweetie. Tell me, what about this crush worries you?”

“Taking a deep breath, Applejack went for it. “She’s a mare, Mama!”

The Alicorn gently nuzzled Applejack in a warm hug. “Ooh a mare. How interesting. That is a bit odd, isn’t it?”

Sitting back up, Cadence raised her hoof into the air, signalling a nearby guard. The Angel, this one with dark blue fur, poured some tea for her Cadence as she remarked offhandedly. “ After all, love is generally between a mare and stallion, is it not? I do wonder though, is the fact she’s a mare the reason you’ve fallen for her, my daughter?”

A confused expression made itself present on Applejack’s face. Seeing this, the Goddess took a sip of tea, before explaining what she meant. “Love is a rather unique form of magical energy. Unlike Celestia’s Breath, or Luna’s Miasma; my Song flows of its own volition. Most magic is static, unchanging; performing the same action every time. Love however, is a very chaotic force. It can destroy lives, yet bring those lost, Salvation. It can shatter the mightiest weapon yet be the strongest shield against hardship.”

Rising from her chair, Cadence flared her wings and continued her thoughts. “While it is true I never intended for mares or stallions to lay with their own kind, love is a wild spark that has no reigns. It seizes the heart and it follows no rules. Ever-changing, it moves to its own tempo; its own rules. All it takes is a simple gesture, smell or perhaps glance, to change the ashes of indifference to a spark, and that spark to a roaring wildfire. Your most hated enemy could a heartbeat later become your most treasured partner, just like that. Tell me, what about this Pegasus made you take notice?”
“Her eyes.”

Applejack didn’t even hesitate, and Cadence took notice. She encouragingly gestured to the goofily grinning Earthpony. “Tell me more. What about her eyes, excited you?”

“Glistening with innocence. Those magenta eyes of hers shined with a curious fascination as she turned ta look at meh.”

Smiling slyly, Cadence responded offhandedly. “That’s quite the description of a pony you saw for only five seconds.”

Immediately, Applejack snapped back defensively. “Big Mac says it were five seconds but Ah swear it was five minutes and-”

Stopping suddenly, Applejack just stared at Cadence. As the Alicorn raised an eyebrow in amusement. Realization hit Applejack. “Ah really do have a crush on her, don’t Ah?”

Softly chuckling, Cadence gently told her. “Oh, I’m no expert-”

Pausing to giggle at her own joke, Cadence continued. “But I’d say you have quite the bite from the love bug, my daughter.”

Lowering her wings, the Alicorn’s face grew serious once more. “As to whether or not it’s immoral, I suppose it depends on how you view it. On one hoof, it was never intended for those of the same sex to lay together. Love was created to allow for a passionate furthering of the race while creating a nurturing environment for the offspring.”

Cadence broke into a playful grin. “Though I would never condone immoral behavior, perhaps you should consider this as well. The beings of our world were given not only life, but the freedom to choose how they would live said life as well. How could I punish a child who when given a caramel apple decides to eat it? I gave you the delicious, lip-watering treat. I never said don’t eat it. So when a child without the restrictions goes for a bite, should they be sent to a time-out for being naturally hungry?”

Cadence shook her head in dismay. “Do you understand now, my daughter? Your love stems not from the fact she is a mare, but more so the fact your heart sees her as something more. You don’t see her as just a mare, but you see something in her that you just don’t see from the stallions in your daily life. That is nothing to be ashamed of.”

Gently wrapping a hoof around Applejack in a warm comforting hug, Cadence lowered her voice to a whisper. A whisper that thundered in the mind of Applejack for years to come. “Do tell me though, how does that caramel apple taste? Does it make you want another bite?”

Standing up, Cadence’s horn began to glow. “That’s a question; you’ll have to decide the answer to yourself, my daughter.”

***

“An so, Ah found mahself standing outside th’ gates of our homestead. Ah learned something new. Granny up to her dyin’ day never learned of mah trip.”

“So that’s it then sis? Your story ends with you understanding what you wanted, just like that?”

“No.”

The terse reply from Applejack took her little sister by surprise. It was not only sudden but also very tense. After a few seconds and a deep breath, Applejack explained. “No, truth be told, even though Ah knew what she was sayin’ Ah just couldn’t shake the feeling of ‘ow wrong a mare and mare was. Perhaps it was the fact that th’ Apples ‘ave always been against the idea; it bein grounds of excommunication from th’ family. Or maybe it was mah own stubbornness to adhere ta mah teachin’s growin’ up. Ah just couldn’t shake it. Th’ tale of ‘ow Ah got mah first crush ended there, but th’ lesson would continue on fer years after.”

“What happened?”

Laughing loudly, Applejack answered her. “A lot of self-inflicted misery an’ lost time. Ya see, Sugarcube…”

***

It was a few years after the trip, and Applejack, like all ponies, found herself in the dating scene. She chose to ignore the caramel apple and instead tried to find a suitable stallion; unable to shake her family’s teachings. There were many able-bodied stallions in Ponyville. Many kind-hearted and wonderful stallions lived in the town; that any mare would be lucky to have. Any mare, except Applejack.

It wasn’t that she hated them. They were nice and wonderful and...She felt nothing. Sure there were a few undesirables, but mainly the stallions went out of their way to make her feel like she owned the world. One even spent an entire day buckin’ apples on her farm while they chatted. Still, she felt nothing. There was no spark; the ashes of indifference smouldered until cold as the proverbial fireplace they rested in. Suitor’s came and went and occasionally she found herself face to face with that Pegasus. Sugarcube Corners, running through the grassy fields for exercise, even flying above her farm; the Pegasus was everywhere.

Every time she saw the rainbow-maned Pegasus, the ashes ignited and the flames of desire welled up in her soul. Still, she suppressed her desires. It wasn’t right after all. And still she found herself growing more and more miserable as dates came and went. And that’s when it happened.

*Tap Tap*

Applejack lay in her bed on the second story of the quaint farmhouse. Tears streamed down her face as they had, for countless cold, lonely nights. Like always, her thoughts eventually turned to that Pegasus, and so she lay there, imagining what it would be like.

*TAP TAP Crack*

The window next to her bed cracked under the intense tapping; snapping Applejack from her thoughts. “What in tarnation?”

Rolling quickly out of bed, Applejack raced to the window and threw it open. The panes swung out and slammed to the side from the force. “OW!”

Shocked, Applejack watched as a red-faced Pegasus hovered into view. It was a mare who wore a stallion’s tuxedo. In her hooves was a bouquet of roses. The embarrassed blushing Pegasus threw the bouquet at Applejack and hurriedly shouted at her. “I picked these for you! Also, that hurt!”

Applejack couldn’t help but laugh at the strange sight. It was the Pegasus from before; the one with the magenta eyes. Her heart began to pound rapidly, while her pupils dilated staring at the mare. Still giggling, she finally let go. “Howdy there, Sugarcube. That’s one heck of an entrance. Mah name’s Applejack an’ don’t worry bout th’ window. Ah’ll fix it tomorrow. So what’s your name, cutey?”

The Pegasus looked like she’d been holding her breath while screwing her eyes shut. Now opening her eyes slowly, her chest heaved in and out as she took rapid breaths. It was a moment before the Pegasus let out a breath of relief and in a raspy voice stated. “Rainbow Dash. Hey you wanna watch the stars in the meadow?”