The Hearts and Hooves Day Battle!
“Shy! Shy!” somepony was shouting, shaking her shoulders. “C'mon, Flutters, wake up!”
Fluttershy blinked away, yawning softly. She smiled when she realized she was looking into a pair of red-and-yellow eyes. “Good morning, Discord.”
He huffed and pulled away from her, floating in the air. To anypony unused to him, he could be quite frightening. If his mix-and-match body parts (complete with several predator characteristics) didn't put a pony on edge, his powerful, reality-warping magic definitely would.
“Honestly. How late were you planning on sleeping in?” he scoffed. Shaking a finger at her, he said, “You're lucky I'm living with you during my little friendship lessons with Teacher Twilight, or you'd sleep through the whole day!”
She sighed and crawled out of bed. “I did have an alarm clock, Discord. But you ate it, remember? You still haven't replaced it, even though you promised…”
He grumbled and crossed his arms. “Whatever. I think do a much better job than whatever trinket you had.” He snapped his fingers. “Breakfast is on the table. You should really eat up before you take care of all your little critters.”
She sighed again as he teleported away, brushing out her mane as she trotted downstairs. One the table was a stack of pancakes, which Discord was already digging into. “I'll eat in a minute,” she told him. “I just have to check the mail first.”
She opened the door…and was pushed back by an avalanche of letters and packages. After a few moments of struggle, she lifted her head out of the mostly-pink pile. “What in—” She gasped suddenly and rushed towards the window. “Oh no…”
From her window, she could easily see a crowd of stallions. A least a fourth of Ponyville's male population was there, along with many ponies she didn't recognize who likely came from different towns. They were all pushing against each other, throwing gifts and letters onto the large pile spilling into her door. More and more of them were pouring into the crowd, some even trying to climb over the pile.
She whimpered and ducked below the window before she could be spotted. “Oh no…” She whimpered. “Today is…Hearts and Hooves Day!”
Discord shoved another pancake down his gullet. “On yeah, one of your pony holidays. What's the big deal?”
She whimpered and crawled over to him, avoiding the windows. “Today is the day where ponies give the ponies they like gifts,” she told him. “Flowers, cards, chocolate…”
“I knew that,” he said with a roll of his eyes. “What I mean is, why are you acting like it's such a big deal? Is it the social interaction? Because everpony's already left their gifts! You're home free for the rest of the day!”
She fiddled with her mane. “Not exactly,” she said. “This is just the early morning group. Even more ponies will start showing up as the day goes by.” She gulped. “Pinkie, Rarity, and I get a lot of attention…and I think Twilight has a few admirers…”
He blinked. “So are you saying today's going to be…pure chaos?” he said, a grin spreading on his face.
“…Yes,” she said. His grin grew wider. She gasped, her eyes growing wide. “Oh no, if I'm facing the early morning group here, Pinkie and Rarity must be swamped! I have to go find them! We all stand a better chance of surviving together!”
“Surviving?” he said with a chuckle. “It's just a few letters. Sit down and eat breakfast first, at least! Trust me, everything's fine!"
A rectangular box smashed through the window, flying right in front of Discord's muzzle before embedding itself in the wall. They both stared at it for a silent second, eyes wide. She reached out and grabbed his arms, pulling him under the table with her.
A flurry of boxes and letters smashed through the window, another pile of presents quickly forming against the wall. “Oh, they do this every year,” she whimpered. “We'll have to sneak out the back door.”
“Or, I could snap us right into town,” Discord said. He looked at a box that had tumbled near him. Curious, he pulled off the pink ribbon and peeked inside.
Rows of chocolate lay within, a little card promising each had a different filling. He licked his lips, now noticing the overwhelming scent of chocolate in the room. He lifted his paw, ready to make a selection of a tiny treat.
Fluttershy grabbed his paw. “Could you really?” she asked, a smile on her face. “Could you really teleport us away? That would be much better than sneaking through the forest…”
He glanced between the sweet chocolates and her smiling face. Grabbing the box with his paw, he snapped his claw. They disappeared in a flash of light.
They reappeared in the middle of town square. Fluttershy squeaked. “Discord, we can't be out in the open! We have to be stealthy!”
He chuckled. “Fluttershy, don't worry. All of your admirers were at the cottage, so you needn't fret about being in town.” She whimpered, her ears pressing flat against her skull.
“Fluttershy~!” cried a chorus of stallions from all around them. Discord's ears perked up, his eyes widening. Fluttershy gasped, her head swiveling.
Stallions were rushing towards her from all directions, many holding flowers, cards, and boxes. “Fluttershy!” they cried again, hearts present in their eyes. Fluttershy whimpered and fell to the ground, placing her front hooves over her head.
Discord dropped his chocolate and grabbed her under his lion's arm and floated into the air just as the stallions reached them. Some of the pegasi tried to fly up, but other stallions dragged them back down into the growing mound of ponies. The admirers began throwing their gifts at her, screaming declarations of love.
One gift flew past Discord's muzzle—a large bar of an expensive brand of chocolate. He caught just a whiff of it, and it smelled delicious. He licked his lips and wrapped his other arm around Fluttershy, preparing to dive for the treat.
A scream came from just a few feet away. Fluttershy gasped and flew out of his grip. “It's Pinkie Pie! She's in trouble!” she shouted before flying off to Sugar Cube Corner. Discord groaned, glancing between her, the crowd of stallions following her, and the chocolate bar…which was now smashed on the ground.
With a growl, he followed Fluttershy. How bad can this trouble even be? he thought. He froze when he and Fluttershy reached their destination. Oh.
A crowd of stallions had gathered outside Sugar Cube Corner. Gifts were being tossed around, and the stallions were all shouting at each other. The problem was that they had grabbed Pinkie Pie and were pulling her back and forth, like some kind of cross between Tug-Of-War and Keep Away.
Fluttershy hovered overhead, trying to swoop down and grab Pinkie. But some stallion was always in the way, shoving her back. Pinkie tried to bounce away, but was pulled back into the pony mosh pit. “Help!” she cried. “I can't break away! There's too many to dodge!”
Suddenly, a snort and the sound of a stamped hoof came from the outside of the crowd. “If y'all don't get movin',” shouted a voice with a distinct Southern twang. “Y'all are gonna hafta deal with me!”
A male voice shouted, “It's Appejack! Run away!” The stallions shrieked and ran away, dropping Pinkie as they left. Fluttershy and Applejack hurried to her side, while Discord flashed next to them.
Applejack helped Pinkie onto her hooves. “You alright, Pinkie?” The pink earth pony nodded vigorously. “That's good. I didn't want to give anypony a black eye this early in the morning.”
She turned to Fluttershy. “And just what are you doing in town this early? You about scared me out of my skin when I saw you weren't in the cottage! I thought somepony had kidnapped you again!”
Discord blinked. “Wait…you've been kidnapped?” He placed his hands on her shoulders.
She scuffed at the ground with her hoof. “Um. Just once. And Applejack and Rainbow Dash…” She looked away. “Well, he doesn't come around any of us on Hearts and Hooves Day anymore.”
Applejack snorted. “Damn straight." Fluttershy gasped and flew up to cover Discord's ears. He rolled his eyes. "But you know the rules, Fluttershy. We never go anywhere alone today.”
“But I wasn't alone!” Fluttershy shouted. “I had Discord with me! And I only left so he could get to his friendship lessons and I could find everypony else!”
Pinkie coughed. “Speaking of that…AJ, have you seen Rarity today?” Applejack’s eyes widened, and she galloped towards Carousel Boutique. Pinkie, Fluttershy, and Discord followed her.
“Rarity gets the second-most level of attention,” Pinkie said, “And somehow, she attracts stallions with more resources.”
“So what? They have better gifts?” Discord asked. His eyes focused on a chocolate stand for just a second, until he noticed the red ‘Sold Out’ sign in front.
“Not exactly,” whimpered Fluttershy, her ears still pressed flat against her skull. Discord looked down at her, his eyes softening.
They rounded the corner and skidded to a halt. Outside Carousel Boutique was a crowd of stallions, all being pushed back by two rough, burly-looking stallions. A unicorn was levitating an unconscious Rarity into a hay cart, attached to a rugged, brown-coated stallion.
Applejack was already pushing her way through the crowd, stallions fleeing at the sight of her. But she wasn't going fast enough—Rarity was almost in the hay cart. Fluttershy took to the air and flew towards her as fast as she could, but a rainbow-colored streak beat her with ease.
Rainbow Dash hovered high overhead, holding Rarity under her forelegs. “What do you think you're doing, Cabellaron?” she growled. “And how did you even know where we live?”
The rugged stallion unhitched himself from the cart. “That is my secret, Rainbow Dash,” he said. “And curse you for getting in the way of my plans!”
Rainbow shook a hoof at him. “Beat it, before I give you a black eye!”
“Bah!” Dr. Cabellaron huffed. “Fine! But this isn't the last you'll see of me!” He threw a wrapped box onto the doorstep of the boutique before galloping away, his three henchponies right behind him.
Rainbow glared at the crowd. “That goes for you, too! Get outta here!” The stallions gulped and scattered in all directions, dropping whatever presents they had.
Rainbow slowly landed on the ground, placing Rarity down gently. The rest of them approached and surrounded her. Applejack leaned down to her head, feeling at her forehead and then sniffing at her muzzle. Her nose wrinkled.
“I think they drugged her with something,” she said. “She needs to see a doctor.”
Rainbow Dash scooped her back into her hooves. “I can get her to the hospital. After that…same hiding place as always?”
“Yep,” said Applejack. “Everything's nearly set up. Swing by whenever you can—but don't come alone! Remember the rules!”
Pinkie tapped her the ground. “I have some shopping I need to do, though…”
“Do you have a pony going with you?” Applejack asked. “If not, you can just come with me to our hiding place right now. Shopping can wait until this crazy day is over.” Pinkie sighed and came to her side, and Rainbow took to the sky with Rarity.
Fluttershy said, “I need to take Discord to the library. Right, Discord?” She looked around for the draconequus. “Discord?”
He had wandered a few feet away, and was gathering boxes of chocolate in his arms. She fluttered over to him and wrapped her forehoof around his arm. “Discord, we need to get to Twilight's.” He grumbled and became limp, letting Fluttershy drag him behind her as she flew along.
They passed by a group of stallions along the way, who seemed to be trying to decide whether approaching the mares was worth a black eye. Several of them looked at Fluttershy as she tried to move past as quickly and silently as possible.
Discord's ear twitched when he heard them whispering. “She's beautiful,” one said, “The most beautiful of the four."
“There's six of them, you numbskull,” another hissed. “And two of them will make your life a living hell if you dare to breathe on her.”
A third murmured, “Still, if we could only just give her a gift…” Discord felt several gleaming eyes focus on the boxes he was carrying.
Several of the boxes were lit up in multicolor glows, while other ponies simply came right up to him and tried to grab the boxes away. He growled and pulled back, dispelling the unicorns' magic by blowing it away. The stallions didn't give up, though, even more of them coming closer and trying to pull his prizes away.
“Discord!” cried Fluttershy. His head snapped in her direction, fearing some fool had dared to hurt her. To his relief, she was alright, but was instead looking at him with concern shining in her eyes. His arms fell limp, and the stallions dove like pigeons onto the boxes he had dropped onto the ground.
A stallion approached Fluttershy, holding a slightly-squished box. She whimpered and backed away, but stallions were surrounding her on all sides, holding out gifts. Her head was whipping back and forth, and her breathing was growing heavy as the stallions came closer.
Discord snapped his fingers, and they disappeared in plume of white smoke.
He ended up slamming into a forcefield and getting the wind knocked out of him.
As he slumped to the ground, he saw what he had slammed into was a shimmering magenta dome that surrounded the library. Fluttershy had appeared at his intended destination, the front door, on the other side of the dome. Next to Discord were more stallions holding gifts, banging on the forcefield and yelling Twilight's name.
Fluttershy saw him on the other side of the dome and started to rush towards him. The door opened behind her, and the stallions began shouting even louder as Twilight came out.
Twilight said something to Fluttershy—that, or she was just flapping her jaw up and down, he couldn't tell—and Fluttershy said something back, pointing a hoof at him. He waved.
Twilight's eyes widened, then narrowed in concentration as he was surrounded by her magenta aura. Slowly, she pulled him forward and through the dome, which was vibrating under the pounding hooves of stallions. She dropped him on the ground once he was pulled through.
“Sorry about that,” she said, approaching him. “I had to turn away nine suitors this morning. I didn't want them interrupting our lesson today, so I set up an anti-male shield.” She glanced at the crowd, who were silently shouting. “Anti-audio, too.”
“Fascinating,” he said, dusting himself off and rolling his eyes. “Is this lesson going to take long? There's some delightful chaos going on, complete with a side of chocolate, and I'd hate to miss it.”
Twilight laughed. “Oh, it shouldn't take that long. I designed a lesson for today that's approximately one hour.”
Discord groaned as Fluttershy pulled him along into the library. She turned to Twilight as she was closing the door. “Applejack's setting up our usual hiding spot for this day at, um…” She leaned in to whisper, “Sweet Apple Acres. We typically hide there until the day is over and all the stallions go away.”
Twilight smiled. “I might join you later. But right now, we have a lesson to go over—” Discord groaned again. “—and I've got a shield set up. You can stay here, if you'd like.”
Fluttershy smiled and took a seat next to Discord. “Oh, thank you. Applejack would be so mad if I left without anypony with me.”
Twilight shook her head, pulling a whiteboard out with her magic. “I don't understand why the town is in such a frenzy. Stallions in Canterlot never acted like this on Hearts and Hooves Day!”
“Ponyville's acted like this since I moved here…” Fluttershy mumbled. “Can we not talk about this?” Twilight nodded, looking at her with concern, and started to draw on the chalkboard.
“Today's lesson is about natural harmonic connections between ponies, and how you can become part of them,” she said. “The first and most obvious example of this being breaking out into perfectly choreographed songs and dances.” Discord sighed and rolled his eyes, leaning his head into his palm.
“…And that's Starswirl's theory of pony song,” Twilight said. “Now, since his disappearance, there have been more studies giving way to more accurate models…” Discord groaned and buried his face in his hands. Fluttershy leaned over to him and gave him a comforting pat on the shoulder.
He gazed at her, a smile flickering on his face. He opened his mouth, wanting to say something like ‘Thank you' or ‘Can we please leave now?’, but the door of the library burst open before he could say anything.
“Twilight! I need your help!” Rainbow shouted. “Stallions have taken over the hospital Rarity's in! We have to go save her!”
“What!?” Twilight leapt to her hooves. “Why is Rarity in the hospital? When did the stallions take over?”
Rainbow shouted, “She got knocked out so I took her to the hospital so the doctors could make sure she was alright! But before I left, a bunch of stallions poured in and pushed their way into her room! I need your help to bust her out and get her to our hiding spot!”
Discord grinned. “So, you need to get those ponies out of there?” His eyes gleamed as his fingers poised to snap. “How does a trip to the Saddle Arabian Desert sound? Or maybe a one-way route to the Dragonlands? Or maybe just…turning them into chocolate?”
“Discord, no!” Fluttershy and Twilight said in unison. Something magenta flashed outside of the window, and Twilight quickly lit her horn.
“I don't know if my anti-male shield will work if I'm away for too long,” she said. “And if those stallions get in…I'm worried that something could happen to Spike.” She glanced at the door where the kitchen was. “He's been busy in there all morning. I don't think he's even noticed the craziness that's going on.”
Rainbow growled, “So you're just going to hide here, instead of helping me rescue Rarity? Some friend you are.”
Twilight glared at her. “If I can keep this shield up, this library will be a safe space for Rarity…a much closer one then the barn at Sweet Apple Acres.” Rainbow sighed and grumbled, but nodded.
Fluttershy stepped forward. “I'll go with you, Rainbow.” Discord stared at her, jaw dropping. Rainbow raised an eyebrow.
“Really? I mean, I was mostly hoping for Twilight's magic to fix everything, but an extra set of hooves works too.”
Discord crossed his arms. “And yet you reject my ideas of using my magic to fix everything?”
Rainbow glared at him. “Yes. Because I don't trust you.” Fluttershy gasped, looking between her and Discord. The two of them were glaring at each other, challenging the other to make the first move.
She began pushing Rainbow towards the door. “We should really hurry to the hospital! No time to waste!” she said. “We'll bring her back here in just a bit, Twilight.”
The two of them flew out the door. Twilight and Discord watched them fly away though the window. When they were out of sight, Discord turned away and began to stalk along the bookshelves.
Twilight sighed. “Well…here's hoping everything goes well.” Her horn lit up, strengthening the dome. “And Discord, don't even think about trying to sneak away. We still have a lesson to finish.” The draconequus flinched, teleporting away from the back window and to his spot in front of the chalkboard.
“Thank you,” Twilight said, picking up her chalk. “It's good to see you have some manners…some respect for the wonder of learning.”
He snorted, and muttered under his breath, “Don't kid yourself. You know I'm not doing this for your sake.”
Rainbow practically dragged Fluttershy behind her as she flew to the hospital. A large crowd of stallions completely surrounded the building, all of them pushing and shoving against each other in an effort to get closer.
“We'll have to go in through a window!” Rainbow shouted. “Now, which one is Rarity's room…” She shielded her eyes from the sun and squinted at every window.
Fluttershy shuddered. “Um, are you sure breaking a window is a good—”
“There!” Rainbow cried. “That room's packed with stallions! That has to be her!” She dove forward, accelerating as she approached the window. Fluttershy slowly fluttered after her, muttering “Oh goodness,” under her breath over and over.
Rainbow broke through the window, sending glass flying inwards. “Alright, you punks!” she shouted. “Any of you who even thought about doing weird stuff to my friend, you'd better run!”
Fluttershy carefully flew through the hole in the window, eyes carefully focused on the sharp shards of glass. Inside, she got a good look at the room. Rarity was lying on a lone hospital bed. Some stallions had crawled next to her unconscious form, while others were messing with her saddlebags. Others had been in the middle of pushing their way through the doorway and crowd.
Right now, though, they were all frozen, their eyes focused on Rainbow Dash. Fluttershy was very glad she couldn't see her face, because whatever her expression was, it made the stallions' eyes fill with terror. Someone outside the room coughed lightly.
Rainbow moved almost instantly, flying forward and striking one of the stallions on the bed with one of her back hooves. He sailed backwards and smashed into the wall, leaving a large dent. Rainbow wasn't finished, as she struck the other stallions with her front hooves.
The crowd quickly turned tail and galloped out the door, trampling some of Rainbow’s victims in the process. She snorted and continued her assault, flying after the group and striking the ones who weren't fast enough to escape her. In seconds, the room was cleared. Rainbow slammed the door, dusting off her hooves.
“And that's that!” she declared. “Now all that's left is getting Rarity to a safe spot.”
Fluttershy scuffed at the ground. “Um…why did you need any of us? You just scared all of them off by yourself.”
Rainbow shrugged. “I thought some of them would put up more of a fight than that. Oh well. I still need an extra pair of hooves to carry Rarity out.” She pushed down on the door handle…and nothing happened. She jumped out and started violently rattling the handle, but it wouldn't budge.
“Damn it!” she growled. Fluttershy gasped, her hooves flying out to cover Rarity's ears. “It must have locked itself when I closed it! I guess we'll just have to go through the window!”
Fluttershy flew in front of the window, spreading her front hooves out to block it. “No, Rainbow! We can't! There's too much broken glass, and one of us might be cut!”
Rainbow growled, “What to you want me to do, buck through the wall!?”
A moaning sound made them freeze and turn their heads. Rarity was slowly opening her eyes, a hoof reaching up to her forehead. “Oh, my head…what happened?”
Rainbow and Fluttershy flew to her side. “Dr. Cabellaron and his goons drugged you and almost kidnapped you,” Rainbow told her.
“And then a lot of stallions flooded into your hospital room,” Fluttershy added, helping her out of bed. “They're gone now.”
Rarity groaned, pressing a hoof to her forehead and lifting her saddlebags onto her back. “Well, at least this admirer decided to drug me and not knock me over the head.” She froze, looking up at Rainbow. “Wait…Cabellaron?”
Rainbow nodded. “I was surprised, too. I didn't think he knew where we lived, or that he was interested in you.”
Fluttershy coughed. “Um, maybe we can talk about this once we're out of here and safe in the library?”
“You're right, darling!” Rarity said. “We must leave before any brutes return!” She tried to step forward, only to stumble and nearly fall. Fluttershy and Rainbow caught her by the shoulders.
“Slight problem with that,” Rainbow grunted. “The door's locked, and the window's full of broken glass.”
Rarity pursed her lips in thought, before her eyes lit up with an idea. Her horn glowed with magic, and the glass simmered in her blue aura. With a little bit of wriggling, the frame of glass popped out of its wooden frame and fell to the floor with a great crash.
“Alright,” Rainbow said. “Here's how we'll do this. I'll grab your front hooves, Fluttershy will take your back, and we'll fly you out the window.” She grabbed onto her hooves, and Fluttershy copied the action, hovering into the air.
Rarity huffed as they were partway through the window. “This is undignified,” she grumbled.
“We'll put you down once we're through. Then you can be as dignified as you want,” Rainbow grunted. Fluttershy hovered through, ducking her head to avoid hitting the frame. The two pegasi placed Rarity carefully back on her hooves, and Fluttershy allowed her to dizzily lean on her shoulder.
“I don't…think I can make it to our hiding spot,” Rarity said with a small gasp. “Oh, my head feels like somepony stuffed cotton inside of it!”
“The library is closer, and Twilight's using her magic to keep it safe,” Fluttershy said, rubbing at her back.
“One problem with that,” Rainbow said. “We have to go through town to get there. And we can't fly over it with Rarity—we'll attract too much attention, and some stallions could and will fly after us.”
Fluttershy said quietly, “I could call Discord, and he—"
“No!” Rarity and Rainbow shouted at once. Fluttershy frowned and meekly hid behind her mane. Rarity sighed and continued, “It's not a bad idea…I just don't know if I should put my safety in his hands when I'm in such a state as this.”
Rainbow snorted. “Headache or no, I don't trust him with anypony's safety. Except maybe yours, Fluttershy. On one of his good days.”
“Yeah!” Pinkie added. “I mean, it's clear that he cares most about you, Fluttershy!” Rainbow closed her eyes and nodded in agreement, before her eyes slammed open and she leaped into the air with a yelp.
“Pinkie!” she shouted. “What are you doing here!? I thought you went with AJ!"
“Of course I did!” Pinkie said. “But then she was setting up the sleeping bags, and I was nailing boards onto the windows, when suddenly my Pinkie Sense went off! I figured out that Rarity was in trouble, and it was happening at the hospital, so I dropped everything and ran here as fast as I could!” She peered at Rarity. “You don't look like you're in trouble, though…”
“It was stallions,” Rainbow said. “We took care of them. But we'll all be in trouble again if we can't figure out how to get to the library before another crowd decides to show up!”
Pinkie jumped up and down, waving her hoof above her head. “I had an idea! Pick me, pick me!”
Rainbow sighed. “Alright, Pinkie. What your plan?”
“I'll wear a disguise and sneak through the town, finding the route with the least amount of stallions! Then, I’ll come back with a map, and help Fluttershy guide Rarity through the streets all sneaky-like! And Rainbow, you can scout ahead and scare off any stallions that try to come our way!”
Rainbow blinked. “…That's actually a pretty good plan,” she said. “But are you sure you can handle mapping the area by yourself?”
“Yep! Pinkie Pie has got this under control!” she said, placing a pair of Groucho glasses on her muzzle. “I'll be back in two shakes of a milkshake!” She ran off into an alley and disappeared.
Rarity sighed. “I hope she actually finds a good route.”
Rainbow scoffed. “She knows we're trying to avoid stallions and not to get caught. What else is there to worry about?”
“So why aren't Rainbow and Applejack being chased by stallions today?” Discord asked. He had been doing his best to distract Twilight from the lesson in table manners she decided they needed to discuss before she made them lunch.
She paused in her precise napkin folding. “Well, this is my first Hearts and Hooves Day in Ponyville, so I can only theorize. But I'd have to guess it's either that they lack whatever qualities make the stallions chase after the rest of us, or the stallions are just too scared to actually approach them.”
Discord started sneaking over to the counter. Spike had left some time ago, carrying a heart-shaped gift box with him. There was still some leftover chocolate there, if he could just get to it… “Scared?” he asked, trying not to draw her attention.
Without even looking up, Twilight levitated everything on the counter—including his chocolate—and placed it back in the cupboards. “Yes, scared,” she continued, adjusting the silverware placement ever so slightly. “Applejack bucks trees all day, and Rainbow Dash is exercising when she's not working or sleeping. They're strong, and everypony knows it.” She placed a hoof to her chin in thought. “And I think I've heard rumors about one of them bucking someone through a wall…”
Both of them flinched as something burst through the door. Twilight ran back into the main room, while Discord teleported there in a flash of light. Rainbow had slammed the front door open, and was laying on the ground a few feet away, panting. Fluttershy, Pinkie, and Rarity stumbled in behind her, collapsing as soon as they were through the door.
Twilight closed the door with her magic, her horn pulsing as more power was put into her shield. “What happened?” she asked. “You've been gone for an hour! Were you caught by somepony?”
Discord shoved past her to help Fluttershy to her hooves, guiding her to a pile of pillows in the corner, which just happened to have a glass of ice water right next to it. Rainbow grunted and struggled onto her hooves.
“No, we didn't get caught,” she grumbled. “It's just that somepony found the most convoluted route possible to get through town, which we had to both hurry and sneak through at the same time!”
Pinkie rolled onto her back. “Well, you didn't want any stallions to find us, which they didn't!”
“It took us forever to get back here, though! Look at Rarity! Look at Fluttershy!” Rainbow snapped. Fluttershy gulped and tried to hide in the pillows, sipping at her water. Rarity groaned and tried to shakily get onto her hooves, narrowing her eyes at Rainbow.
"Don't bring me into this," she said, before flopping back onto the floor with a groan.
Fluttershy started to stand up, looking at Rarity with concern. Discord shoved her back down into the pillows, floating over at pulling Rarity up onto her hooves. Fluttershy made no more efforts to escape from the pile. “Thank you, Discord,” Rarity said as she adjusted to standing, a hoof going to her forehead. “I do hope these dizzy spells wear off soon…”
Discord clearly wasn't paying attention. His eyes were focused on her saddlebag, his nose twitching as he sniffed at the air. Licking his lips, his eagle claw detached from his arm and dove into her saddlebag, rummaging through the contents.
Rarity yelped and dropped the saddlebags onto the ground, before opening it and trying to grab onto his hand. “How dare you!?” she hissed. “Searching through my belongings without permission! Why…!”
His claw flew out of the saddlebag and reattached to his arm, holding something heart-shaped. It was immediately snatched away from him as Rarity levitated it in her magic. “Taking my belongings! You…you…!” She paused, looking more closely at the object.
It was a heart-shaped piece of chocolate, wrapped in red paper and a golden ribbon. On one side, a cursive ‘To Rarity' was written, while the other side only had smudged ink. “I hope that didn't smear on anything of mine…” she muttered. She glanced up, and saw that Discord was eyeing the chocolate.
“Oh…you like chocolate, don't you?” she asked, receiving a nod in response. “And you were fishing around in my bag for this…”
“I smelled it,” he said. “And I thought you had more on you than that, but I'll take what I can get.”
She sighed. “I guess one of those ruffians snuck it into my bag in the hospital.” She frowned at it, holding a hoof to her stomach. “Ugh. I can't even think about eating right now…” She saw Discord was still eyeing it, licking his lips, his tail wagging slightly.
“Well…while your searching of my personal items was quite rude…” she said as she lifted the chocolate up with her magic.
“Of course you can have this,” she said, placing it in Discord's hands. His face lit up, eyes and grin widening. He unwrapped it, licked his lips, and was about to take a large bite, but Rarity said something that gave him pause. “After all, I don't even know who put it there, so I couldn't accept their romantic gesture.”
Rainbow grunted, “If they were snooping in your stuff, they were probably a creep, anyway.”
“Yes, that too,” Rarity said.
Discord pulled away from the chocolate, tilting his head. “Romantic gesture?”
Rarity gasped. “Oh, this is your first Hearts and Hooves Day, isn't it? Well, despite all the chaos that's happening around us, this holiday is meant to be about love, and mostly romantic love. Those stallions may be chasing us because they think we're attractive, and most of them may be acting like brutes…but all of their gifts are meant to be romantic gestures.”
She pushed the chocolate closer to him. “Now, this isn't a romantic gesture from me to you. It's simply that I don't accept this gift, whoever it's from, and if you want it, it’d be a shame for it to go to waste.”
Discord stared down at the heart-shaped chocolate. “Sweets as a romantic gesture, huh…” he mumbled.
Pinkie sighed, spreading her hooves out on the floor. “Yeah. But there's so many gifts that they all start to blend together in my head. If a stallion really wanted to catch my attention from in the crowd, he'd have to do something really big and grand!”
“Big and grand…” he muttered, brows furrowing as he kept stared at the treat. He glanced for a second at Fluttershy, who was lightly dozing in the pillows he'd shoved her into.
Twilight looked over at him. “Are you alright? You keep mumbling to yourse—” She froze, her eyes widening as her horn flickered with magic. She quickly clamped her eyes shut, her brows furrowing as her horn glowed brighter, sweat dripping down her forehead.
Rainbow stared at her. “Uh, Twi? Why's your face all screwed up like that?”
She grunted, “Shield…being…overpowered…too…many…” Rainbow blinked, then rushed to the front window. Outside, a large group of stallions—the largest they had seen all day—was pressing against the magenta dome. Small cracks were beginning to form.
Rainbow gasped, then turned around. “Everypony, we have to get out of here now!” She grabbed Pinkie and flipped her onto her hooves. “I know you're not that tired! Get Rarity out the back door!” Pinkie squeaked and rushed to Rarity, pushing her towards the back.
Rainbow slammed her hooves down next to Fluttershy. She stumbled out of the pillows, falling into a heap on the floor. “Rise and shine! Emergency evacuation!” she shouted. “Head for the back door!”
Fluttershy squeaked, “I-I don't know where…” Discord floated over to her, pointing in the direction Pinkie and Rarity had just left in. “Oh, thank you.”
He was about to grab her hoof and guide her, but Rainbow shoved him aside and pushed Fluttershy to the back door herself. “Discord,” she grunted. “You know I don't trust you. But if you can stay here and buy us a few seconds head start…I might start to.”
He snorted. “How do you know I won't just leave?”
“I'll count the seconds it takes for them to realize we're not here and start following us,” she said bluntly. “Besides, if you don't, they could capture us. Do you want Fluttershy to get kidnapped by some creep again?” He snorted, crossing his arms and glaring down at the floor.
Rainbow nodded stiffly, before flying over and grabbing Twilight under her forelegs. “I'm taking you to the back door, Twi!” she said, “But keep powering the dome! We'll need as much time as we can get for a head start.” She flew towards the back, leaving Discord alone in the library.
He sighed and snapped his fingers, creating a lawn chair for himself. He watched out the window as the small cracks in the dome became larger, as the dome itself started to flicker. Seconds later, it disappeared with a pop, and a wall of sound hit him, making him topple out of his chair and drop his chocolate.
With a scoff, he shoved the chocolate into an interdimensional pocket and crawled back onto his chair. A wave of screaming stallions bearing gifts was rushing towards the front door. He sighed and filed the claws on his lion's paw.
The crowd smashed through the door, all screaming somepony's name. “Fluttershy~!” “Rarity~!” “Pinkie Pie~!” “Twilight~!” They sent Discord odd looks, shoving past him and tearing the room apart, looking for the objects of their affections. He snapped his fingers behind his back, and the path to the back door was sealed off with a bookshelf filled with the complete works of Nopony McPretendsmith.
Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a flash of pink through the window. He snapped his tail feathers, and all the windows on that side were covered in thick frost, and he made a glass of chocolate milk for himself.
He causally sipped it, lazily levitating a few things back into place as the stallions stormed through. Eventually, some of them walked over to Discord. “Where's Rarity?” they asked. “Somepony saw her coming here from the hospital with Pinkie and Fluttershy.”
He shrugged. “Don't trust stallions who are your rivals. She probably never left the hospital.” He glanced out the open front door, and saw a rainbow-colored tail quickly vanish behind the corner of the house. “Do you want to be sent there?” he asked, eyes gleaming as he lifted his fingers into a snapping position.
One of the stallions across the room shouted, “You liar! I was there! I got chased out by that crazy blue pegasus!” His horn flared with magic. “I don't know why those six even put up with you, but I'm sick of your riddles and your tricks!”
Discord yawned, and the stallion disappeared in a burst of sparks. The ponies next to him shrieked and backed away. “Oh, calm down,” he told them. “He's back at the hospital. He'll probably be back here in a few minutes.” He relaxed back in his chair and sipped his milk, watching them with half-lidded eyes as they continued to ransack the library.
Eventually, somepony grunted, “They're not here. They probably snuck out a while ago.” They slowly started to filter out, searching around the building for tracks of some kind. About a quarter of them dropped gifts that said ‘To Twilight' in a large pile.
There were only a few stallions left, the most rabid of searchers. One suddenly froze and turned to Discord. “…I've heard rumors that you're living with Fluttershy,” he said. Discord nodded, and he held out the small box he was carrying. “Could you take this to her, then?”
The other stallions’ ears pricked up, and they all began holding their gifts out to him. He stood on his feet, looking down sternly into their gleaming, pleading eyes. “So, you want me to deliver your…romantic gestures…to Fluttershy.” The group nodded enthusiastically.
He hummed, stroking at his beard. “Well, let's see…you've caused beautiful chaos today. There's plenty of sweets for me to eat, courtesy of you. And you've made a delightful mess of Twilight's home.” He grinned, and the stallions' faces lit up.
“But!” he said in a singsong voice, holding up one finger. “You've caused my bestliest best friend some distress, and she ran herself ragged because of stallions like you…” He smiled, bringing his fingers up to snap. “So my final answer: Nope!”
He snapped, and all of their gifts burst into bright red flames. They screamed, dropping the bundles of fire onto the ground. The presents slowly rolled after them, leaving the floorboards under them unburnt. The stallions screamed again and galloped out the door, the burning flames matching their pace and staying right behind their back hooves.
Discord laughed and laughed, until he slowly sank to the floor, tears streamed down his face. “Oh, I wonder how far they'll run?” he laughed to himself. “When the fires go out, will they notice, or keep running? Maybe they'll make it all the way to Canterlot!” This sent him into another fit of laughter.
Slowly, gasping for breath, he wiped away his tears. “Oh, that was good. I haven't laughed that much in a while.” He smiled, noticing that the stallions who had been hovering around the library had apparently run away during his laughing fit.
He shook his head. “Those stallions have wasted enough of my time,” he muttered. He snapped his fingers and disappeared with a spray of pink petals.
The five of them had snuck around the back of the library without being spotted, and had been ducking into bushes and through alleys as they made their way to the edge of town. “Okay,” Rainbow whispered. “If we go through that alley there,” she pointed at one across and further up the street. “We can cut through some gardens, and we'll be out of town in two hours.”
“Two hours!?” Twilight hissed. “Why does it take so long?”
“Because we need to consider the time spent just hiding from crowds,” Rainbow said. “Now, the street's almost clear. Are you guys ready?”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “I could just teleport us right to the barn.”
“Nope,” Rainbow said. “AJ has an anti-magic fence around the orchard. She's had it up since that time a unicorn teleported in and back out with Rarity. Anypony who tries teleporting in is repelled several feet away…”
“Well, we can walk!” Twilight said, her horn glowing.
“…Right into the spike pit,” Rainbow finished. “Now, if you're going to teleport, just get us to that alley. There's a crowd approaching!”
The five of them disappeared in a flash of magenta, reappearing in the alley. Rainbow darted forward…and smacked into a brick wall. “What the hay?” They all stared forward at the tall brick wall that stretched right across the middle of the alley.
“Twilight, can you get us to the other side?” Rainbow asked.
Her horn glowed, and then sparked. She shook her head. “I need some time to recharge. The shield burned through most of my magic reserves.”
Rainbow grunted. “Fluttershy, help me fly everpony over!” She grabbed Twilight under her forelegs, while Fluttershy carefully scooped up Rarity.
Pinkie peered around the corner of the house. “Um, I’m not sure we'll have time to get all of us across,” she said. Rainbow dropped Twilight and peered around the corner, then gasped. Fluttershy, Rarity, and Twilight all peered, too.
A large crowd of stallions was marching through the street, several of them glancing down alleyways and into bushes. The crowd was so large, it stretched all the way down to the street corner. They were all chanting or chiming the names of the mare they admired. The five of them ducked back behind the wall.
“What are we going to do?” Fluttershy said, trembling. “They're almost here!”
Twilight lit her horn again, but it still only sparked uselessly. Rainbow glanced between the corner, the other four, and the brick wall. Pinkie’s eyes were wide as she bit at her hoof. Rarity bit her lip, then smiled as her eyes widened. “I have a solution!” she declared.
She pulled a small glass bottle out of her saddlebags. They watched as she pulled off the cap and took a deep breath, coughing as she did so. Tears formed in her eyes. “It's a very exquisite, yet strong perfume,” she explained as she handed it to Twilight. “Here. Watch this.”
She stepped out from behind the corner. The stallions gasped and started moving forward, but froze when they saw tears in her eyes. She placed a hoof to her chest.
With a sniffle, she said, “Gentlemen, I appreciate your admiration, but I'm afraid…” She sobbed, letting a tear fall down her cheek. “I'm afraid I already love somepony else.”
The stallions gasped. “Oh, if you're already in love with somepony…” one said. One by one, they dropped the presents they were holding. “We're sorry, Rarity,” they said as a group before leaving, several of them bawling their eyes out.
In the back, in front of the next group of admirers, stood a small, purple dragon—Spike. He looked sadly down at the small heart-shaped container and bouquet of roses he held. “After all my work…all my pining…she's fallen for somepony else?” he whispered, tears forming in the corner of his eyes.
He threw the presents onto the ground. “Fine! Of course she'd fall in love with somepony else…” He sobbed and turned away. “But my heart doesn't matter compared to your happiness!” he wailed before running away, tears streaming down his face.
“Oh no…Spiky-Wikey!” cried Rarity, taking a step forward. Rainbow grabbed her and dragged in back around the corner in the blink of an eye.
“Are you nuts?” Rainbow hissed. “You can't go after him! Not right now! There's no way that trick is going to work for that long. Right, guys?”
She turned, and saw Twilight and Pinkie uncapping Rarity's perfume bottle and taking a deep breath. Pinkie gagged and pulled away, coughing as tears streamed down her face, while Twilight teared up but managed to carefully cork the bottle.
Together, they stepped out. Twilight started, letting tears flow freely down her face. “We're sorry, but…”
“We love somepony e-he-hels!” Pinkie sobbed, tears gushing from her eyes. The crowd of stallions murmured, but quietly dropped their presents and walked away. With them gone, the largest part of the crowd came forward, looking determined.
Twilight and Pinkie ducked around the corner. “All that's left are Fluttershy's admirers!” Twilight exclaimed. “If she can trick them, we'll be home free!”
Rainbow grinned. “Sweet! You ready, Fluttershy?”
Fluttershy scuffed at the ground. “Well, um…”
“Great let's go!” cheered Rainbow, giving her a push out into the open. The four of them peeked around the corner, watching her slowly approach the crowd.
“Um, excuse me,” she said softly. “But I…I love someone else. I can't accept your gifts.”
“Yeah right!” somepony in the crowd yelled. “All four of you in love? I don't believe it!”
“If you're in love, what's his name?” somepony else shouted. The crowd shouted in agreement and began chanting for a name.
“This is bad,” Rainbow said, gulping. “I've got to get her out of there!” But before she could rush forward, Fluttershy took a deep breath, closing her eyes. As loud as she could, she proclaimed,
“I LOVE DISCORD!”
Everything became silent, aside from Fluttershy panting heavily. Every stallion’s jaw dropped, their eyes widening slowly. One made a groaning sound and fell to the ground, eyes rolled back into his skull. One by one, the stallions fainted.
After a few more seconds, her friends rushed to her side. “Fluttershy, that…that…” Rarity stuttered.
“Was amazing!” Pinkie exclaimed. “You managed to trick all of them into fainting! How did you come up with that?”
Rainbow chuckled. “I can't believe you said that.” She placed a hoof on Fluttershy's shoulder. “I'm sure that was a difficult lie to tell.”
Fluttershy tilted her head. “…Lie?” A second later, her eyes widened and her face flushed bright red. “Oh yes, that was a lie! I was definitely lying! All a lie!” She laughed, her blush traveling down her neck as her eyes became unfocused. “Hey I know! Let's go hide and act like I never said that!”
She trotted on down the path. The others glanced at each other and shrugged before following her down the path.
After an hour or so of careful sneaking, they had finally made it to Fluttershy's cottage. “Just a little bit longer, and we can relax in Applejack's hiding spot,” Twilight sighed, wiping sweat off of her brow.
“Oh no,” groaned Rainbow. “We've got incoming ponies, dead ahead!” They all looked forward and saw that a large cloud of dust was approached them from down the path. “Everypony take cover!”
Fluttershy yelped and jumped into a bush. Twilight teleported away behind a tree. Pinkie glanced hither and thither before finally jumping over and huddling behind a rock. Rarity glanced at the others’ hiding spots with disdain and pulled a large grey scarf out of her saddlebags, wrapping it around her neck and muzzle before putting on a large, floppy hat that covered her horn.
Rainbow glared at her as the dust cloud came closer. “Really?” Rarity shrugged, to which Rainbow rolled her eyes.
The dust cloud came closer. Fluttershy whimpered and crouched low, placing her hooves above her head. The dust cloud covered all of them and slowly disappeared as whoever was in it suddenly stopped. Slowly, Fluttershy dared to open one eye and peek out.
Instead of stallions, there was a very annoyed-looking Applejack. She was currently glaring at Rarity. “Take that off, it's an awful disguise,” she said bluntly before turning away. “Pinkie Pie! Where are you?”
Rarity pouted and put the garments back in her saddlebags. Pinkie leapt back over the rock. “I'm right here! Sur…prise…?” she squeaked. Applejack was glaring at her with an intensity that could melt diamonds.
She growled, “I specifically told you to not go off on your own. I told you to stay right by my side while I got the barn set up. But what do I see when I turn around a minute later?”
“You left! Without even saying a word! Why, I thought somepony’d tried to kidnap you again!” She stomped the ground.
Pinkie sat on her haunches, twiddling her hooves together. “Well…it was only because my Pinkie Sense told me Rarity was in trouble at the hospital…”
Fluttershy crawled out of her bush. “It's true, Applejack,” she said quietly. “Rarity really was in trouble. And we needed all the help we could get to save her.” Rainbow and Rarity nodded in agreement.
Applejack looked between all of their faces and sighed. “I'm sorry, Pinkie. You know that if you'd told me…I'd be right by your side, charging in to save Rarity?” Pinkie bit her lip and nodded. “Just…don't spook me like that again. This holiday is bad enough without the accidental scares.”
She lifted her head, grinning. “The good news is, our little hiding place is all set up! I know the day is almost over, but we might as well hide for the last bit of it. Let's all go together, right now! Safety in—” She froze, her nose twitching. She lifted her head up, sniffing at the air. “Y'all smell that?”
The others rose their eyebrows, but obligingly sniffed at the air. Their eyes slowly widened. Twilight said, “Is…is that…”
“Chocolate!” Pinkie declared, licking her lips and sniffing the air fervently. “And it's coming from over there!” She jabbed a hoof in the direction of Fluttershy's cottage.
She gasped. “I didn't think those stallions dropped off that much…”
Applejack snorted. “If I didn't know better…I'd say that smells like someone baking.” She sniffed at the air again. “The smell is too strong or spread out to be just a bunch of chocolate dropped off.”
Rarity gasped. “But that would mean…somepony broke in!”
Fluttershy gulped and whimpered. Rainbow patted her on the back and said, “Well, there's six of us! Let's get in there and kick them out!” She darted towards the cottage.
“Wait, Rainbow!” Applejack and Twilight shouted. With equally annoyed growls, Applejack started running after her, while Twilight teleported in front of the house. The remaining three glanced at each other before galloping after them.
Rainbow smashed through the door, which made Fluttershy wince. Applejack and Twilight rushed after her, while the other three sped up. Seconds later, they finally made it to the doorway, panting. “Alright, buster! Time's up!” Pinkie declared before marching into the door, Rarity and Fluttershy flanking her sides.
Inside, the first three were frozen in place, staring straight ahead. Fluttershy followed their gaze into her kitchen. Discord was standing there, staring blankly back at them. On the table in front of him was a four-tier chocolate cake, covered in chocolate frosting. Tiny chocolate candies decorated the rims of the tiers. Scattered all around him were the empty chocolate boxes the stallions had left that morning.
He seemed to be in the middle of piping on the decorations. Each of the tiers had a different pattern. The top one read I, the second had a large heart, the third said you, and the fourth one only had a single line on it. He slowly put down the frosting pipe, making eye contact with Fluttershy.
“…Welcome home!” he said. “I wasn't expecting you to come here so early…and with a group of your friends…” His eyes darted between everypony in the group. “I'm afraid I haven't made dinner for Fluttershy yet…much less all six of you.”
The smell of chocolate was thick in the air. Fluttershy's stomach growled, and she remembered that she hadn't eaten anything that day. More growling sounds came from the others' stomachs, and they all started to eye the cake hungrily. Pinkie even began to drool, and Rarity pulled a handkerchief from her saddlebags and tied it around her neck.
Discord backed up a little, holding his hands out in front of him. “Now wait a minute there, ladies. I wouldn't do that, if I were—” Rainbow and Pinkie gave out a great battle cry and leapt at the cake.
Discord snapped his fingers, wrapping Rainbow up in a blanket burrito. Pinkie dodged the blanket flying towards her easily, and sunk her teeth into the cake. "No!" he cried, grabbing her and pulling her off. “Maybe I can still save—”
A kitchen knife in a magenta aura shot past him, cutting slices out of the cake. Twilight and Rarity each grabbed a piece with their magic, Twilight taking a bite right out of it, and Rarity grabbing a plate and fork before daintily digging in.
Applejack rushed past the stunned Discord and grabbed two slices, offering one to Rainbow, who had almost wriggled herself completely out of the trap. Pinkie slipped from Discord's hands, and took another large bite right out of the cake. Applejack grabbed another slice and tossed it to Fluttershy, who just barely caught it.
Another growl from her stomach took away any hesitation she had, and she took a large bite out of the cake. The sweet taste filed her mouth, and she almost moaned, quickly swallowing the bite and taking another. She was slowly moving closer to the cake, as were Twilight and Rarity.
Rainbow had given up on eating slices and was joining Pinkie in taking large bites out of the cake. Applejack wasn't at the point yet, but was only scooping out crude hooffuls now and taking large bites out of them. Twilight was still slicing the cake, and Rarity was kind enough to grab another slice for Fluttershy before tucking into her next one.
In almost no time at all, the cake was almost completely devoured, the remains a chocolaty mush. All of them sat back on the couch or in chairs, stomachs bulging as they (aside from Rarity) licked the last bits of chocolate frosting off of their hooves.
“That was good,” Rainbow said, patting at her stomach. “I forgot that I'd skipped breakfast and lunch.”
“Nothing like chocolate for dinner!” Pinkie said. “I feel so much better. Full stomach and raring to go!”
Fluttershy noticed that Discord was staring down at the remains of the cake, pouting. “I spent all afternoon making that…” he mumbled. Before she could go over to him, his head snapped up and he glared at them. “I hope you five thieves are happy! Oh sure, stallions have been throwing chocolate at you all day, but you had to eat the one thing that wasn't for you, huh?”
The others lowered their ears in guilt. Suddenly, Pinkie shot up onto her hooves with a gasp. “That's the first chocolate I've had today!” she exclaimed. “I forgot to pick up Cheese's delivery from the post office and send him his!” She bolted out the door in a blur of pink.
Rarity gasped. “Oh, I broke poor Spikey-Wikey's heart earlier! I must go find him and assure him of my feelings!” She galloped out the door.
“Wait, Rarity! I'll help you find him!” Twilight said, galloping up to her.
Applejack sighed. “Well, so much for hiding. I'd better get back home so I can take all those defenses back down.” She stood up, tipping her hat at Discord. “I'm awful sorry I ate your cake. I guess my stomach got the better of me.”
Discord crossed his arms and snorted, tiny flames coming from his nostrils. Applejack sighed and walked towards the door. Rainbow stood up. “Hey AJ, if I help, can I get a glass of cider?” Applejack shrugged, which was all Rainbow needed to pump her hoof in the air and zoom ahead of Applejack.
Fluttershy and Discord were left alone. She sighed and approached him, wrapping her forehooves around his torso. “I'm sorry I ate your cake,” she said. “I was just so hungry. None of us have had time for breakfast or lunch.”
He sighed, patting the top of her head. “Well…I was going to share it with you anyway,” he grunted. “Did you get enough to eat, at least?”
She nodded, then gasped softly. “Oh my! I almost forgot!” She flew over to the kitchen cabinet, searching behind the spice cupboard. After a few seconds of searching, she pulled out a tiny, heart-shaped box.
She flew back over at placed it in Discord's hands. “Here. For you.” Carefully, he pulled back at the gold ribbon and opening the box. A thin, heart-shaped chocolate was inside. “I-I figured you'd like it,” she said quietly. “I'm sorry it's not that big or grand…”
He bit at the corner. “It's the best chocolate I've ever had," he said. Seeing her head tilt in confusion, he added, “Because it's from you, my…best friend.” He flinched as he said that, glancing over at the ruined remains of his cake.
She followed his gaze, and quickly said, “And that cake was the best I've ever had! Because I…like you, my best friend.” She couldn't look him in the eyes.
The two of them laughed awkwardly, small blushes forming on their faces. They sat on the couch together, each of them inching closer to the other, still not willing to look the other in the eyes.
After a few more nibbles of chocolate, Discord coughed and held a present out to her. “Happy Hearts and Hooves Day,” he said as he tossed it into her hooves.
Surprised, she carefully unwrapped it. The square-shaped wrapping paper fell away to reveal another, crudely-wrapped lump inside. She rolled her eyes at him, making him chuckle, as she unraveled this next layer.
Inside was a metallic sculpture of Discord's curled, sleeping form. She yelped and almost dropped it when she felt it breathe, a tiny “Z" appearing above its head. On its back was a glass panel with glowing red numbers in it.
“A new alarm clock,” he muttered. “Still not as good as the real me, but better than that tasteless trinket you had before.”
She smiled, holding the tiny Discord gently in her hooves. “Thank you, Discord,” she said. “I'm sorry, I didn't get you anything but the chocolate…”
He shrugged. “Eh. You're letting me live in your house while I'm busy with ‘friendship lessons',” he said, making air quotes with his fingers. “I still don't know why Twilight thinks a dose of schooling will make me…not as me anymore?”
She laid a hoof on his shoulder. “Well, I think you've been doing well.” He glanced over at her with a tiny smile. She turned away, messing with her new clock, using her mane to block her blush from his sight.
Suddenly, her eyes (and blush) lit up. “A-actually, Discord, I d-do have a present for you!” She exclaimed, her pink blush turning red.
Before he could say anything, or even look at her, she leaned up and kissed his cheek.
It wasn't much of a kiss—she only brushed her lips against him lightly, and pulled away after just a second. But it was full of emotion, and her blush turned a bright shade of red as his eyes widened.
“G-goodnight!” she cried, leaping off of the couch and galloping upstairs with her alarm clock.
Discord didn't say anything. With his eyes as wide as saucers, he slowly reached up with his claw to lightly touch where she had kissed him. He blinked a few times, before his pupils suddenly turned into hearts, a love-struck smile creeping onto his face.
He glanced in the direction she had retreated in. “Happy Hearts and Hooves Day,” he whispered under his breath. With a sigh, he added, “I wonder what next year will bring…”
