But With a Whimper

by Undome Tinwe

Rating: everyone
Tags: Sad, Romance, Rarity (EqG), Drama, Equestria Girls, Sunset Shimmer
Length: 3005

Rarity and Sunset say goodbye to each other as their marriage comes to an end.

Rarity and Sunset say goodbye to each other as their marriage comes to an end.

This story is just one of the many stops on the Monorail! The event's theme is "trains". For a full list of content, click here! This is the 2nd stop, but be sure to check out the others! The previous stop was https://www.fimfiction.net/story/461401/friendship-on-the-infinity-train You're more than welcome to write your own addition, the only requirement is rail transport as a major plot element or location. Have fun!

An entry into the Depth in Innocence Contest.

(2020-08-10) Featured on Equestria Daily!

Published 2020-02-21 22:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2020-02-21 22:20:01 UTC

This is the way our world ends

"Thanks again for coming with me, Rares."

"Oh, it's no trouble at all, dear." Rarity's lie hovered between them, daring Sunset to call it out.

She didn't, of course. They'd both gotten so good at pretending that everything was okay, and it would've been a shame to ruin that now.

Silence hung between them, punctuated by the rhythmic clacking of the train as it brought them closer to their end.

Sunset placed a hand against the window, glancing out as building after building passed by, tall structures of steel and glass casting long shadows along the streets beside them. "You know, I'm actually going to miss the cities here. There's something about the hustle and bustle and that hum of industry that I never really appreciated." She turned to Rarity with a smile that didn't reach her eyes. "I guess you don't know how good you have it until you know you're going to lose it forever."

"And they say I'm the dramatic one." Rarity's smile didn't reach her eyes either. "You can come back, you know. I'm sure Princess Twilight wouldn't stop you from using the portal whenever you wished."

"I know," Sunset replied, "but I don't think I'll be coming back for a while. We finished signing the divorce papers, so there's no more business left for me here. I probably won't be visiting until I finish my degree, at least."

The casual tension in the train cart instantly sharpened. "Darling, that will be years from now!" Rarity almost sounded panicked as she spoke. "Surely you don't intend on staying away for that long."

"I need a clean break." Which this definitely wasn't, right now. "I'll still write, but if I actually come back..." Sunset shook her head. "I don't think I'd be strong enough to walk away again."

Rarity rolled her eyes. "Please, you're one of the strongest women I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. So strong that you think that shutting yourself off from all your friends is a marvellous idea."

So, it was going to be like that, huh? "You'd know all about shutting yourself off, wouldn't you?"

"That's not fair." The fire in Rarity's eyes was familiar, so, so familiar, and Sunset was going to miss it so, so much. She leaned in, and Sunset could see her hands grow even whiter as they gripped the table between them. "I didn't need someone else fighting my battles for me."

For a moment, Sunset almost snapped back a reply before she thought better of it. After all, they'd done this song and dance so many times that they'd already danced their way off the cliff without looking back. "You're right," she said instead. "But I won't be alone in Equestria either. Princess Twilight will be there, and you know she won't let me close myself off completely."

"Thank goodness for that, at least." Rarity's lips curled into a wry smile. "Is it wrong of me to be so terribly jealous of her?"

"Nah, I know I'm a catch in any form." They both winced at that. "Sorry, that was stupid of me. I'm still getting used to not..."

"It's quite alright, dear." And yet, Rarity's shoulders remained tense, her posture stiff and unyielding. "I daresay that any woman— or mare— who catches your eye should consider themselves most fortunate."

Sunset raised an eyebrow. "Even you?" she couldn't help but ask.

There was a pause, and Rarity's eyes clouded over with memory before her smile became more genuine. "Yes," she said softly. "No matter that our flame burned itself out far too quickly, I still count myself the luckiest girl in the world to have been able to share that fire with you."

A robotic voice sounded out from the PA system. "Now arriving at Canterlot West."

"One more stop after this," Sunset said, her heart sinking at the finality of it all.

"One more stop before you leave us for good." Rarity drummed her fingers against the table between them. "I must say, this whole process has been terribly maudlin and drab. Here we are, two adults who were once madly in love with one another, about to say goodbye for who knows how long, and we've barely even raised our voices at one another. It's not at all what I had fantasized about."

"Umm..." It was amazing how Sunset could still be surprised by Rarity after all this time. "You've fantasized about us breaking up?"

"Well, not us in particular," Rarity replied with a dismissive wave of her hand. "But you must admit, there's a certain potential in the sundering of a relationship that can't be found anywhere else. Few things bring out the darker passions like a breakup, and there's all sorts of opportunities for heated words and cries of remorse and twisted acts born of a broken heart!"

"Uh-huh." The train came to a stop, and Sunset ignored Rarity's dramatic gestures in favour of staring at the passers-by outside. "Sounds like a real fun time."

"Well, we'll never know now, will we?" Rarity huffed, and Sunset could imagine her offended expression. "Our divorce was so amicable that Wax Seal had to ask if I was holding your family hostage in a warehouse somewhere."

Sunset snorted. "Gotta admit, it was pretty funny when we told him you were getting a hundred percent of everything I own uncontested."

That, at least, got a real smile from Rarity. "It was quite the sight, as unbecoming as it might be to find it amusing. By the way, I've already had your half transferred to a trust, in case you return."

"You don't have to–"

"Please." Rarity tried to hide the plea with an ironic air, but Sunset saw through it to the real pain in her eyes. "Let a silly girl hold on to a bit of false hope. For a little while, at least. If you don't claim it eventually, I'll have it repurposed towards more charitable ends."

"You can just take the money," Sunset said. "Besides, not like much of it is mine, anyway."

"Nonsense," Rarity replied. "I don't need it, but there are many who could use it well."

"Fine." Funny how this was the first disagreement about money they'd ever had. Guess the old saying was right about it not buying happiness.

The train started moving again, a slow acceleration that pulled Sunset back into her seat, farther from Rarity. "Man, you can barely feel this thing speeding up," she commented, sinking into the leather upholstery. "I should really talk to Princess Twilight again about opening up some more connections between the two worlds. Now that she's more comfortable ruling Equestria, it's time for her to look forward."

"A marvellous idea." A familiar gleam of calculation sparkled in Rarity's eye. "There's an entire world of people just waiting to be graced with my designs on the other side of that mirror."

"I'll put in a good word for you with the Princess." Plans unfolded in Sunset's mind. Of building a bridge between worlds. Of enabling new friendships to form. Of allowing the knowledge of humans and ponies to uplift each other. "There's a lot that I think you could do for them, and Carousel has the influence to set the right example for other companies going forward."

"That would be lovely." There was that fire again, the one that had first drawn Sunset to Rarity. Unfortunately, she was just as susceptible to it now as she had been then. "Thank you, Sunset."

"Don't mention it," Sunset replied. "I'm just glad I could finally help you. Too bad it took me leaving to get to that point."

They were moving at a blistering speed again, trees and streetlights blurring past Sunset as she watched Rarity frown. "Don't sell yourself short." Her reply made Sunset grit her teeth. "You've supported me in more ways than I could possibly count."

"You're probably right about that." It was hard to keep the bitterness out of her voice, but Sunset persevered. "But I haven't been able to help you like this before, in a way that really matters for your career."

"Darling, you have helped me," Rarity insisted.

"Stop," Sunset hissed, her fists clenching and unclenching as she kept her gaze on the passing cityscape. "Let's not do this again. We both know how this'll go, and I'm really not in the mood for your pity right now."

"It's not–" Rarity pressed her lips together into a hard line, cutting off her words. "Very well. Shall we talk of more pleasant matters, then?" Her smile looked forced, and Sunset didn't comment on it. No point breaking old habits now.

"Yeah, okay." Sunset perked up. "Oh, did I show you the card the kids in my class made me?" She reached into the bag next to her and pulled out what was once a generic thank-you card from the store, but was now so covered in well-wishes that you could barely see the pictures of the balloons originally printed on it. A warm glow settled in her heart as she opened it up to reveal a sheet of paper scrunched inside, similarly covered.

"Oh my." Rarity placed a hand over her mouth as she watched Sunset unfold the paper to reveal the full extent of the positive messages her students had left her. "They truly do adore you."

A nod from Sunset. "I'll miss them. I'll miss teaching, too. Maybe… maybe when I'm over there, when I finish my doctorate in thaumaturgy, I can look into teaching some classes again." She paused. "I think that would be fun."

"Do you–" It hurt to see Rarity hesitate. She'd never been scared to speak her mind before, and Sunset had loved her for it. "Do you think it could be enough?"

"I don't know," Sunset answered truthfully. "It wasn't enough for me to be happy over here..."

"But I won't be over there." The words were whispered, desolate, deprived of Rarity's usual melodrama.

Fresh pain lanced at Sunset's heart. "No, you won't."

"I never meant to make you feel as if what you did wasn't important."

"It doesn't matter now." None of it did, not anymore.

"I suppose it doesn't." A heavy silence filled the room before Rarity spoke again. "Do you think it ever did? Could we have saved this – saved us – if we'd had the benefit of hindsight?"

For a second, Sunset was tempted to answer flippantly, to throw out a quip and dodge around the question. But Rarity's earnestness gave her pause. She was using that tone of voice that only came about when she wanted to ask something important, but didn't want to seem needy.

So, Sunset took the time to consider her response as the train continued its journey towards the resting place of the portal. "I dunno," she finally said, shrugging. "Maybe if I'd pushed the Princesses harder about opening things up. gotten myself an ambassador position. Then at least I would've felt like I could stand proud beside you." She hated saying those words, hated how petty and childish it made her sound, but Rarity deserved the truth.

"And I'd have been forced to bear more of the burden of our relationship," Rarity continued, understanding Sunset's train of thought. "And maybe I would've seen the signs early enough to stop this, rather than be caught up in the limelight of my soaring career."

"Maybe." The word hung between, a poisonous thing that taunted them with lost hope. "Doesn't matter, anyways. Unless someone triggers another time loop, we don't get a do-over."

Rarity stayed silent at that, and the PA system made its next announcement.

"Now arriving at Canterlot Central Station."

Sunset stood up, grabbing the bag that contained all her worldly possessions. Mementos of a past neither well-spent nor ill-spent, but simply lived as best she could. "Well, this is my stop." Her heart sank as she spoke the words.

"Wait!" The train lurched in its deceleration just as Rarity stood up as well, sending her tumbling forward.

Sunset caught her right before she fell, holding her in her arms for the first time since they'd agreed to end their marriage. A thousand tactile memories hit her at once, and Sunset pulled her former lover closer on instinct.

In that moment of silence, she looked down into deep blue eyes filled with longing that transcended the physical, intellectual, and even emotional, a longing that drove down into the very soul and demanded a union not just of mind and body, but of spirit.

"This would be much easier if we didn't still love each other," Rarity whispered, her lips inches from Sunset's. "You can feel it too, no?"

Sunset did, and really wished she didn't. A sneaking suspicion crept into Sunset's mind. "Why did you come with me?" she asked harshly, her grip never loosening on the woman she'd once called her wife. Rarity had said she was just keeping her company for the trip, but... "You wouldn't be here if you didn't have an ulterior motive."

"You know me too well," Rarity replied. "I–" She cut herself off for a moment before continuing. "Truthfully, I don't really know why I'm here. Part of me wants us back together, wants me to beg you to return to our home.

"Part of me wants to scream and cry at you to leave and never return, to force that big fight we never had and end us in a glorious blaze of anger and hatred." Rarity's eyes burned as she spoke, and Sunset saw her mind weaving scenarios in a way that only her raw creativity could accomplish. "If you pulled that geode of yours out of your bag, maybe you could tell me my true purpose, because I certainly couldn't. I just knew that I had to come with you."

Sunset didn't need magic to tell her why she was here. Over a decade of being married to her, of learning the ins and outs of her dramatic but sincere mind, of getting to know her better than anyone else, had given her the tools she needed to sort out Rarity's words and figure out what she needed.

"Catharsis," she said simply, holding Rarity's needy gaze with her own and acting as an anchor for her, as she'd done many times before. "You need closure for our relationship."

A small chuckle escaped from Sunset's lips. "You're right that the end of us being together was too boring. We didn't really fight for our marriage, not as hard as we could've, because we both knew where it was going."

"But it doesn't have to go that way." The train was slowing down now, and Rarity's words came out in a rush. "If you came back, we could do things differently. You could have your embassy on this side of the mirror, and I could try to be more supportive of your needs. It doesn't– It doesn't have to end like this. We could set our love aflame again, and fight to keep it burning, and know that if it really did burn down, then we did everything we could to make it work."

It would be so easy to lean downwards and kiss Rarity. So easy to say yes to her and go back to their life together. And Sunset wanted that more than she was willing to admit to herself.

All she had to do was stay on the train as it brought them to wherever Rarity needed to stop by for the business trip she'd scheduled later in the day so that she'd have an excuse to plead her case to Sunset one last time.

And yet…

And yet, Rarity hadn't demanded that she return to her, only suggested.

"If I walk out that door instead, will you be fine?" Sunset stared into those eyes so filled with longing, and yet also filled with so much strength and passion that she knew Rarity would never need her, that their parting would devastate her, but she'd soon be on her feet again, alone. "If our love dies, will you scream into the heavens about how unfair it all is?"

Rarity's eyes widened in realization, and she pushed away at Sunset. "How tragic," she muttered. "We possessed a love that others would have killed for, but it wasn't enough for us."

"Problem with being larger than life is that sometimes, happily ever after just doesn't do it for us. Go find your grand passion somewhere else." This time, it didn't hurt as much to say the words.

"And you shall find someone who needs you in a way that I never did," Rarity replied, "and I want to know all about her when you come back to visit." She winced as she spoke the words, but kept up her grin nonetheless.

"I'll try my best." The doors opened, and Sunset leaned in to steal one last kiss from Rarity before she had to leave.

The Earth didn't move, but Sunset hadn't expected it to.

"Remember to write," Rarity said as she pulled away, the sadness in her voice tinged with acceptance.

And in that acceptance, Sunset found her own. "I'll have some time off in a few months," she said, stepping out the train car and into the cool winter air of Canterlot. "I should be able to come back and visit then."

Rarity nodded, understanding that if Sunset was willing to return so soon, it was because there was no chance of her backsliding into their marriage. "We'll be sure to plan a grand party for you," she promised. "Give my love and regards to the Equestrians."

"Will do. See you around, Rares." The door closed between them, and the train began to move away.

Sunset smiled as she turned and strode off in the direction of Canterlot High. They both had a bright future ahead of themselves, and she couldn't wait to see what they'd do next.