Cozetta only made muffins when she knew my morning was going to be a rough one. I was trotting downstairs to ask her why the castle mailbox was empty when I smelled today’s batch.
Lemon Poppyseed. My all time favorite. Not good.
I made a point to yawn loudly before turning the corner, and sure enough my subtle entrance announcement prompted the rustling of feathers and the wham of an oven door being thrown open. I itched my left sideburn (Mental note: schedule a trim soon), then headed into the castle kitchen to face whatever news Cozetta was sitting on.
“That’s a pretty big batch you got,” I drawled as I sat down. “Gonna eat all of those by yourself? Someone your age really shouldn’t snarf so many carbs at once.”
Cozetta flittered over to set the muffin tray on the table, not looking me in the eye. “No sir. I mean yes sir, it's a big tray, but no sir, I didn’t make it for myself. I made it for you. Uh, not that… um, that is if you’re worried about carbs then… instead I could make… um…” The tips of Cozetta’s electric blue curls were bouncing because despite the kitchen’s noticable heat, she was shivering.
“Cozy…” I said gently, making her sigh sadly. We both had our transparent defense mechanisms. Hers was poppyseed muffins. Mine was using long neglected foalhood nicknames. “Things'll be okay,” I assured. “Can you tell me what came in the mail last night?”
Cozetta bit her lip, flittered over to the counter, and came back with a trio of envelopes.
“There’s an… um… invitation from Fizzlepop- I mean Princess Fizzlepop to her coronation reception next week. It’s going to be in the Dragon Lands.”
I chortled at that one. “So much for her going from Faithful Student to independent magistrate. No doubt she’s counting on me manifesting something flashy and made of obsidian during the banquet for her scaly guests. That's me: full time king, part time edible arrangement designer.”
Cozetta didn’t laugh. Instead she flipped to the next piece of mail.
“There’s also this personal letter with no return address. Just a big heart around the letter ‘C.”
“Chryssi’s a persistent bug, I’ll give her that. Hungry in more ways than are appropriate to talk about at the breakfast table. Just set that one down. It’s grown up stuff that you’d find boring.” Cozetta dutifully complied.
“This last one is from…” she swallowed anxiously. “Twilight Sparkle.”
Ah, there it was.
“Mmm boy. Our Twilight Sparkle?”
“I’m sorry sir, but I don’t think so. The hornwriting is too flowery.”
“Ah.”
Chickenscratched threats from a wanted war criminal, those could be tossed in the trash without a second thought. But a business letter from the other side of the Dimensional Mirror could only mean one thing: that little Alicorn Twilight was imploring my help with some disaster or another. I levitated a muffin out of the tray, deciding I needed one after all. “Alright, Cozetta. Pop the seal and let’s hear what the nicer version of Twilight Sparkle has to say.”
“W-with all due respect sir...I really really don’t want to open this.”
I wordlessly held out my hoof, but Cozetta didn’t seem to want to cough up the offending envelope. “You don’t have to answer her,” she insisted weakly.
“Yes I do. She and her friends saved us all during the Reflections Incident.”
“They didn’t save you,” Cozetta whispered. She was sharper than most fillies her age, which made it easy to forget she was, in fact, still just that: a filly.
“Tough calls had to be made,” I explained slowly. “One stallion’s sanity in exchange for a whole timeline being safe was a fair trade that I made willingly. And hey, I found my way back eventually, right?”
Cozetta made a face that I’d only seen her make once before, when we first met years ago the first time she was brought to the Crystal Empire. Neighsay, my contact in Equestria and headmaster of the boarding school Cozetta had been attending, sauntered into the throne room that day to present not just his top student but also said student's grades for the first semester. Cozetta's marks were flawless, one hundred percents in every subject. This even included Introduction to Magic Theory, a class that was exclusively meant for unicorn prodigies.
As I studied her transcript, Cozetta had stood cowering in between Neighsay and I, knees shaking and plummels too flared with fright to even let her hover fitfully. It was glaringly obvious she’d cheated on every assignment, from the meaningless spelling tests to final exams themselves. I’d say the foal had expended ten times as much effort and trickery into getting these fraudulently perfect scores than she would have needed to just study and get legitimate ones. But she'd done it anyway because she knew her class's valedictorian would receive special consideration to be the king's Faithful Student. And with no family, friends, or home to go back to after the school year’s end, Cozetta Glasgow had needed to cheat her way to the mountain top and cling there for all she was worth because it was a very long fall to the Manehatten backstreets that awaited her return at the bottom. Neighsay had written ahead and told me as much.
I didn’t end up making Cozetta my protege, of course. Fizzlepop Berrytwist had locked into that position years before Cozetta had even been a twinkle in her unknown father’s eye. And yet... Cozetta’s expression when she saw I wasn't swayed, the same one she had now... it had exuded a desperate, pitiful terror accented by the bitter understanding she was probably about to lose everything she’d spent so long scrounging to get. She’d made it to my throne room and met me face-to-face, but for reasons she knew she was too young to fully grasp, the fairy tale happy ending wasn’t what she was going to get.
Now I’m not exactly a soft touch, but my ticker isn’t made of stone either. I gave Cozetta lodging, security as my junior housemaid, and my own pleasant company in the earnest hope she’d never need to make that awful, despairing face again. And until just now she hadn’t. Not even when I kissed her on the forehead and went off to tackle the Reflections Incident.
Gods above, the Reflections Incident.
Cozetta never told me what it was like to see me in the aftermath of all that, and I never asked about it once my senses finally returned. The most I found out was that during those foggy months I spent mad and incarcerated, Chrysalis stepped in to maintain my public image while Cozetta gave her tips and pointers behind closed doors on how to properly impersonate me. My favorite foods, my quirk of scratching my left sideburn whenever I got agitated, those were mannerisms Cozetta knew well enough to share with anypony attempting to be my stand-in. Unfortunately for Chrysalis though, committing so fully and intensely to wearing my persona as a mask somehow gave her a lovesick infactuation with me that got worse and worse the longer her stint went on. And judging by her continued letters that lovesickness had only intensified after I recovered and took back my cape. Changeling brain chemistry is a volatile thing, and though I hoped Cozetta hadn’t been disturbed too badly by having to fan the flames of Chryssi's manic obsession, deep down I knew helping a total stranger cultivate an uncanny recreation of her surrogate father had been total Tartarus for Cozy.
So much mess, so much heartache, all from my one temporary sacrifice. And now Cozetta and I were quite possibly on the cusp of doing it all over again. Who knew what would come from opening Twilight Sparkle’s newest letter? Maybe it would be nothing. Maybe it would be something worse than what happened last time and the wounds left would be much more permanent. But whatever the case, ignoring Twilight's plea absolutely wasn’t an option, just like ignoring Cozetta hadn’t been an option all those years ago. My little ponies mattered, regardless of what side of the Mirror Portal they came from.
“Cozetta, I don’t want to have to give you a direct order. Please relinquish the envelope.”
Slowly, painfully, Cozetta presented the letter that we both were refusing to admit might be my death warrant. For a few seconds, the ripping of paper and unfolding of parchment were the only sounds in the room. Possibly the only sounds in the whole castle. There was a palpable feeling of dissociation as Cozetta and I found ourselves back at our beginning: Here was I, scrutinizing the paper she’d just presented. And here was Cozetta, trembling in her vulnerable smallness as she braced to hear what I had to say.
“How do you like that,” I finally spoke. “Seems the other Celestia and Luna have retired from monarchism and consolidated their collected authority in Twilight Sparkle. This says...” I glanced up at Cozetta, my mouth dry. “Twilight says the dowager sisters are requesting permission to come to our timeline to visit. They want to toast to a job well done.”
Cozetta inhaled, then exhaled. She wasn’t fooled for a minute by my lies, but she wasn’t going to call me out on them either. Because why bother arguing with a king? “Yes sir,” came her defeated reply.
I picked my next words carefully. “If Celestia and Luna are coming here,” I reasoned slowly, “a single tray of poppyseed muffins won’t be enough for all four of us, now will it?” Cozetta turned to her forgotten and very much empty mixing bowl still on the counter, then back to me. “I’m gonna be going and getting them now,” I pressed.
“And I… and I’m gonna need to go buy more flour and eggs,” she mumbled, understanding I wanted her out of the castle.
I conjured a coin purse around Cozetta’s neck and smiled reassuringly. She wiped her eyes as dismissively as she could before flying wordlessly out of the door and in the vague direction of the downtown marketplace. I watched her go until she was just a salmon and blue smudge several streets away. Then I sighed wearily and trudged upstairs to begin donning my battle armor.
I hadn’t lied to Cozetta. Not really. The first half of the letter was an earnest insistence that Celestia and Luna had indeed been planning to visit before disaster struck, and hopefully with my help that visit would still happen on schedule.
The second half of Twilight’s letter devolved into a desperate appeal for help: Apparently my alternate self was back from the dead for the umpteenth time and his latest gambit had been brainwashing the retired Princesses into being his enforcers. Nopony on Twilight’s side of the mirror had immunity to the Umbrum brand of Fear Magic, but they were all counting on Twilight Sparkle to pull off some sort of miracle rescue. The newly crowned Princess didn’t know who to invoke other than me.
Cozetta wouldn’t care to hear these specifics of course. The whos and whys of the situation wouldn't sweeten her understanding that I was heading out to put my life on the line yet again, and nothing in Equestria would stop me. All that Cozetta had was the opportunity I gave her to leave the castle so she wouldn’t have to watch me fire up the Mirror Portal in full combat gear. It made my stomach queasy to think how many of Cozetta and mine’s conversations, even our very first one, were predicated on patently unbelievable lies that neither of us ever challenged the other on.
Things needed to change between us. It was high time Cozetta and I had an honest sit down and agreed to start acting like a proper family.
Hmm. Upon reflection (pun intended), Fizzlepop's invitation did indeed remind me that she'd just come into her own and that her old position of Faithful Student was up for grabs again. If Cozetta couldn't stop me from embarking on these excursions, maybe she could be trained to accompany me on them instead. I could help her pick up her old studies, begin prepping her Alicorn ascension... it’d tax my royal schedule for sure, but I know of a certain Changeling Queen who’d be more than willing to cover for me during the transitional period. (Mental note: pitch these ideas to Cozetta later, once I’m thoroughly done beating myself up over this.)
Heh. ‘Once I’m done beating myself up’ indeed.
I finished affixing my cape and despite (or maybe because of) the imminent peril, I grinned wolfishly at my greying reflection in the dormant Mirror Portal.
“Alright, Sombra you old dog. You’ve got a gut full of muffin batter and a horn full of dark magic. Let’s put them both to work and be back with guests in tow before that second serving tray is even out of the oven.”
Author's Note
Heavy is the head that wears the crown.
Innocent Until Proven Cozy asked whether one bad pony's actions were enough to condemn her parallel self. This Snippet asks whether one good pony is responsible for his parallel self's rampaging. Sticky, ethical stuff that I'm curious for feedback on. Who do you side with here? Sombra or Cozetta? More importantly, do you want to see this Snippet expanded into a full blown story? I do have a rough idea for where I'd have it go.
