My Life on a Cassette Tape

"And then he looked up at me from the mud and said 'Come on in, the water's fine!'" Double finished, fighting back his own laughter, the room around him already in various states, whether laughing, crying, or fighting their own mirth back.

"That certainly does sound like a Cress thing to say!" Raven said through her own laughter. "One time in gym he bet some of the jocks that he could cross the finish line before they could. Once they put bits on it, he took a step backwards and crossed the finish line!" The room was filled with another wave of laughter.

As she laughed, Berry took out her vibrating phone. Her laughter stopped immediately and her color drained looking at the caller ID she saw displayed on her phone's little screen. 'Why is Cheerilee calling?' Emotions ranging from rage to sorrow to elation flickered through her mind. She stood up from her chair and rushed outside, leaving the ponies assembled a tad confused as to what was happening. Looking at the phone in her hand as she stepped outside, she knew it would send to voicemail in a second. She could leave it just that long, right? She could keep up the distance from her family, that they had kept up with her. It would be as easy as doing nothing.

Pressing the accept button, Berry raised the phone to her ear, steadying herself as best she could, pushing past her own hold ups. "Hello? Cheerilee?" The line was silent for a moment, and then another.

"Berry..." Her older sister said finally, just as Berry thought she might have not tried to call her and this was all an accident, "Berry, I need you to come down to the clinic." Berry froze. Why would she need to go to the clinic? What was happening? That was where Piña was. Why did she need to go to her? Why did she have to relive that pain?

"Okay, give me a minute." Berry said, nodding despite herself. "It's..." She started, wanting to say so much, but couldn't find it in herself to get anymore out. The line held the silence for a moment.

"It's nice to talk, Berry." Cheerilee said, her voice sounding shaky as well. "See you soon, alright?" Berry nodded.

"Sure thing." She hung up, looking at the phone for a few seconds, unsure of what to do. Looking back to her house, she desperately wanted to go to a certain cupboard in the kitchen where a bottle of vodka sat minding its own dang business. It'd be so easy; she could pour some in a shot glass, no, she'd throw some into her Oktoberfest mug and down it in a few gulps. She'd then wake up the next morning feeling a lot worse, but oh so much better.

Berry shook her head, looking back to Ponyville, even as the sun drifted a tad closer to the horizon. Before she even realized what was happening - what she was doing - she was running, putting her performance at the Running of the Leaves to shame. She bolted down the short hill her home sat on, darted through the streets, taking turn after turn, running by memory through the evening streets of Ponyville. She had walked up to the front of this hospital so many times before, but had never walked further. In many ways, she wanted to keep it that way. She knew Piña was inside. She knew she wasn't the same small filly that had nearly died. She had watched Applebloom grow up, imagining two other fillies, two fillies she'd never see like that, and then she'd choke on the pain, and then drown the sorrows that whelmed up inside with a bottle.

She skidded to a halt in front of the Ponyville Clinic. It was called a clinic, but ever since the town's proclivities towards natural and arcane disasters became more and more abundantly clear, the building had developed into a fully fledged hospital - one of the finest in Equestria thanks to the proximity of a princess. But it wasn't the building that held Berry's attention. No, what was holding her attention was the three ponies in front of it.

There at the entrance were two particular ponies she never expected to see except in a casket, whether she'd look into theirs or they into hers. A mare who shared Berry's wine color skin with a purple so dark it was basically black mane stood there beside a pink stallion with a curly mane just like Berry's, both of them talking to Cheerilee. Her sister looked past the older mare and over at Berry, giving her a gentle wave. Berry gulped, and stepped forward.

"Thanks for coming so soon, Berry." Cheerilee smiled with genuine warmth, but Berry was a little preoccupied with the two other ponies to notice. Berry gave them a nod.

"M-Mom, D-Dad." Berry said shakily, unsure if she was about to get kicked upside the jaw or if they'd keep it a tad more formal than that. Her mother looked... emotional, to say the least, while her father simply gave her a calm nod in greeting. Suddenly, her mom lunged at her, causing Berry to lock up in fear, only to realize a second later that the older mare was wrapping her in a hug.

"Oh, Berry!" The older mare sobbed into Berry's shoulder. Berry blinked, awkwardly rubbing her mother's back in as best a comforting way she could. Looking over to her sister for a hint, Cheerilee simply gave her the same simple smile she always did - thin and tainted with that edge of sadness, whether her own or reflecting the sadness Berry herself felt. Berry smiled too, unsure of herself even as she grew a tad more comfortable with the hug. "Berry, I'm so happy to see you." Her mother said, muffled by Berry's shoulder.

"I... I was so mad, I should've never pushed you away. I should've reached out long ago... but... I'm so sorry!" Berry felt a weight she hadn't known had been pushing down on her for the last several years lift off her shoulders at this. Her mother... was apologizing? Berry sighed in relief, returning her mother's hug in kind. "I was scared you hated me for what I said. I'm so sorry! Please don't hate me, my little Berry Bunch of Joy! Please forgive me! Please!"

"It's okay, Mom," Berry said calmly, trying to keep herself from overflowing with emotion just yet, "It's alright. I never hated you. I... I was just sad - hurt." Berry's mom pulled away from her daughter, still holding the hug but looking her daughter in the eyes, even as tears streamed from her own, ruining what makeup she had on.

"Berry... Berry I love you so much. I'm sorry for hurting you, for leaving you to the winds. I'm sorry for all the hurtful things I ever said or did to you. I'm sorry I wasn't there for you. My little Berry, I'm so sorry! We..." her voice hitched, before she planted her face in Berry's shoulder once more. Though her voice was a wreck, and though Berry was overcome with emotion herself, she could tell what her mother was saying. How could she not? The last thing this mare had said to her... the most painful thing she could've said. The mare had never forgiven herself for saying it, and now poured her heart out to her daughter, asking for forgiveness.

"I lost something too, okay!? You may not FUCKING notice, but I lost my daughter, your GRANDDAUGHTER! I lost mine, she's gone! My SISTER, your daughter, is still alive, so excuse FUCKING me if I'm more distraught over the pony who is actually dead!" Berry's voice shouted in her echoing memories, her painful memories.

"Well that just proves who's the better mother, now doesn't it?" Her mother's voice had a savage bite, a bite only an enraged family member could put into their voice. In her mind's eye she watched her storm off again, the last time she had seen her. And now... now she was crying her soul out. That mare who had been so jaded at the possible death of her filly who somehow looked passed the death of her grand daughter to blame Berry, that mare was now crying into Berry's shoulder, each tear draining out a piece of the pain, each trembling of her body a shuddering straight from the broken soul that hugged Berry oh so tightly.

"I forgive you, Mom." Berry whispered into her mother's ear with a smile birthed from the release those words gave. "I forgive you... I'm sorry too. I'm sorry I wasn't there. I should've been there for you."

"No." Her father said emphatically, moving up to place a hand on her free shoulder, a few tears whelming up in his eyes as he looked at his daughter. "No, we should've been there for you. Piña was hurt, but our other daughter had lost so much more. We... we were damn fools. Can you forgive us; for everything?" Berry closed her eyes, laying her head on her mother's.

"Yes." She said, so much emotional weight falling from her as she finally started to cry herself. "I forgive you. I well and truly forgive you." Her father wrapped his arms about her and her mother, the three crying into each other, no longer speaking as they simply released all the pain that had built up between them over the years. Berry smiled despite herself, happiness at her reunion overshadowing the sorrow, the pain, and the hurt that had once consumed her. She was... free. Free from it all; from the pain, the hurt, the betrayal, all of it.

They stayed like that for a good long while, thankful to have each other after so long. Their reunion, their reconciliation, even if it were to end right there, would've been sweet enough to last them for the rest of their lives. For the first time in years, they were Family.

"I have one more surprise for you all." Cheerilee said in a soft, sweet tone, breaking through to the three of them. They looked to her through tear stained eyes, trying to puzzle out what she was talking about, when the hospital doors opened behind her. Pushed by a nurse, sitting frailly in a wheelchair, was Piña Colada - smiling, crying, and awake. Berry's breath hitched, much like her mother's beside her, as she stared at her sister. Berry stumbled forward, away from the hugs, and wrapped her arms about Piña, crying into the filly's shoulder, the tiny thing hugging her back weakly. Pulling back, she looked over her sister, trying to see through her tears. In her mind's eye, the image of that little filly dissolved, replaced now with this frail, yet living teen before her. She... was alive!

"Hi... Berry." She struggled out, causing Berry to smile as tears flowed once more. It was all she could do. Words failed her as joy overflowed from the very depths of her soul. Her parents cuddled around their daughters, renewing the hug, though gentler now as they all cried their tears of relief and infinite joy. Berry nestled deeper into the group hug as Cheerilee joined in. They were a family again, they were together again, and now they'd never let go. The daughter, the sister, the beautiful filly; she was alive, she had returned, and though a long road to recovery lay in front of her, it was one she wouldn't have to walk alone.

Berry walked slowly back to her house. She had been given so much back that she had lost. She felt so much better, but at the same moment, seeing the filly now a teenager, though frail, brought unwanted images to the forefront. Not images she didn't want to see - they were images she desperately wished for - but they were images she knew never would be realized in anymore than dreams and imagination. A little Pinchie graduating from the little school taught by Cheerilee. A little Pinchie all grown up. A not-so-little Pinchie all dressed up for her wedding day. A little filly or colt in Pinchie's arms, in Berry's arms.

"Berry Pinch..." She whispered to herself and to the wind that blew past her. She had had the little thing for such a short time. The love Berry had for her filly, the love that thrummed through her heart now as unquenchable pain, had never had the time it needed to be spilled out on the little filly. Berry... Berry missed her. She missed her little Pinchie oh so very much, and seeing little Piña, Pinchie's aunt the age of a cousin, back in the world of the living. It reawakened something in Berry she had long lost. No, not lost. Something she had ran from. The pain of loss and of love.

Suddenly she heard a giggle. A faint, light, and painfully familiar giggle. Looking to it's source, she saw a little pale figure at the edge of the trees. She blinked, and it was still there. She started to move towards it, but it skipped away. Berry's heart lurched, and she ran after it at full speed. She ran and ran and ran, her lungs burning in effort; her eyes stinging in tears; her heart breaking into shards and then melting again to reform into a shape not quite the same, yet still beating, still hurting, still breaking, still shattering, all to melt again to begin over once more.

She ducked past a branch and emerged into a clearing and saw something she didn't expect. A house. Her house. Not the large one that sat on a hill a bit away from Ponyville. Not the one that Twilight had 'accidentally' ordered too large. No, her little house. The little house with a small garden that never quite bloomed right. The little house with a door that creaked awfully after the rain. The little house... with a little filly inside. Her house - her home. Their HOME.

Berry moved slowly to the door, her hand hesitating at the knob. Was she dreaming? She had to be. No home like this was out here, no home with the door frame with the marks carved in it as a little filly grew. No home like that existed anywhere. She had to be dreaming. It was the only answer.

"Then I hope I never wake up." Berry whispered to herself, as she gripped the door knob and turned it. The door softly creaked open, and a gentle cool breeze caught Berry in the back, rushing in to the home. There in the living room, sat a mare, a mare that though Berry had never met like this, she knew all too fondly.

"Hey, Mom." The mare said, her voice more mature, more thanBerry had ever heard it or imagined it. She was beautiful, oh so beautiful. She had grown so much, and beyond that, she was Berry's. Berry's little Pinchie all grown up.

"Pinchie..." Berry choked, taking a disbelieving step closer. Berry blinked away her tears as she took another step, hesitating, but desperately wanting to launch herself to the mare's arms to give her a hug to last a lifetime. To cry tears of joy and sorrow, to spend all the time left to her with the daughter she had lost and had regained.

"I don't have much time, I'm sorry." Pinch said, standing up, dusting off her jeans. "There's only so much that can be done, and I'm sorry but I can't help much. We can only do what we're able with the time we're given." Pinchie gave Berry a sad smile, took a few steps closer, and then hugged her mother. Berry's tears flowed freely, even as she gasped back a wail of sorrow, digging her face into her daughter's shoulder, her arms lashing about her sides, gripping her shirt with all her might, not ever wanting to let go.

"I missed you a lot, Mom." Pinchie murmured. Berry nodded, her throat tight as she cried her soul out into her daughter, blubbering incoherent apologies and words of such desperate wanting, of such desperate need. She needed her Pinchie, she loved her Pinchie! "Don't worry, you don't have to forget me. You don't have to leave me. I'll be with you, no matter where you go." Berry dug her face further into her daughter's shoulder, pulling her in tighter, wanting to memorize every detail.

"I love you!" Berry choked out. "I love you so much! Please," her voice hitched, and she trembled in effort as she pushed past her own weakness and pain, "please, stay with me!" Pinchie rubbed her back in a comforting gesture.

"I want to, I really do, but I can't." Pinchie said in a tone Berry could only describe as motherly. Berry cried, her tears stinging like they had those years ago. "I'll never be far, just... don't forget that. Okay?" She whispered, holding her mother tight. Berry Punch became aware of a glow faintly emanating from Berry Pinch.

"NO!" Berry cried, gripping her shirt tighter, even as the feeling became fuzzy. "No no no no no! PLEASE! Please don't leave me again! PLEASE!!!" Her voice cracked, breaking in renewed sorrow and loss as she wrapped her arms tighter around her daughter's body, her hands scrabbling at her back in a desperate attempt to keep the mare close - to keep her daughter close.

"I have to go." Pinchie said quietly, returning the embrace with all the strength her form allowed. "I love you," her voice echoed out all around her, "Mommy."

Berry fell forward, hitting the damp grass. She cried, but this time, even as she cried, her tears transformed. She looked, rising to her knees, and above her the distant stars of Luna's tapestry filled the heavens. She cried tears she didn't know she had - tears of joy. Pinchie...

Pinchie, in the matter of seconds she had given Berry, had grown to a full mare. Visions flooded her mind of memories so crisp, so clear, and yet... memories she never had had and she'd never would have, and yet still did. Pinchie grew up, became the mare Berry had seen. She graduated, she dated a stallion Berry didn't approve of at first. Pinchie got married, and Berry had been there and handed her off to this stallion she had grown to trust and love in her own way. Pinchie... Berry's breath hitched as she wailed in mingled grief, anguish, and joy beyond words.

Pinchie, her little filly now so grown, had twins. A little filly called Rosé and a little colt named Midnight Blues. They were beautiful, and they were her grandchildren. They grew too, and so did Pinchie. She grew into a mare so graceful, with many more children. Berry closed her eyes, basking in the sights, her tears flowing freely, rolling down her cheeks as she thanked whatever power had blessed her with these sights, these memories that were not her own, but still were hers to cherish.

"I'll be with you, no matter where you go." Pinchie's voice echoed in her ears. "I'll never be far, just don't forget that. Okay?" Berry smiled. She cried, and she smiled.

"I won't forget." She said shakily. "I'll never forget you, my little Pinchie. Never." Berry continued to weep, tears rolling down her face in the cool night air, no longer sorrowful, but joyful and so very grateful. She wouldn't stop, and she wouldn't forget. She would never forget. A smile pulled at the corner of her lips.

"Happy Birthday, Pinchie."