The Weakest Winx

by Maxx Phoenix

Rating: teen
Tags: Comedy, Equestria Girls, Winx Club, Profanity, Random, Fleur de Lis, Slice of Life, Crossover, Alternate Universe, Anon, Second Person
Length: 1679

The Winx force you to play a game

THIS STORY IS A MIDQUEL TO Mind Games Round 1
With the Booms gone, you decide to put together a team. Too bad 'Getting forced to play a game show with the Winx Club XD ' was not in the job description!

Published 2020-03-05 05:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2020-03-21 01:48:25 UTC

The Weakest Winx

You are Anon Yolanda Mouse. The Rainbooms have left you in charge of protecting the Equus County. Right now, you’re tasked with forming your own team just in case. You like the Harmony Knight armor, but you prefer to do things your way, thus, you crafted your own suit, to very mixed results.

“Anon, what the fuck are you doing?”

Your ludacris, thot-like dancing is disrupted by Octavia Melody and Vinyl ‘DJPON3’ Scratch, looking at you curiously. “Oh..Uh...hey, Vinyl, Tavi. What’s up?” You say. “Well, we just on our way to the diner, you want to come with us?” Says Tavi. You happily accept. “Sure, I’ve actually got some business to discuss with you!

The Cake Diner…

Vinyl bopped her head to the music as Tavi looked at you quizzically. “So, what’s up, Anon,” she asked. You slurrp down your Limited Edition Minty Fresh milkshake before telling her.

“Well, while the Rainbooms are away at Magix Academy, I was thinking...we should start a team to defend things around here,” you explained.

“So...you want us to join?” Said Tavi.

“Well, yes. Will you join me?” You ask?

“Screw it, we’re in! Said Tavi. Vinyl nodded in agreement. “Great, now I just need to find Flash, Lyra and Bon-Bon, and we’ll be good.

“Sounds good,” said Tavi. “Hey, what do you think the Winx are up to now?” You ask. Tavi sighs. “Well if Stella's tumblr is anything to go by…”

Stella's Tumblr
I’ve come to make an announcement
Maxx Phoenix is a bitch ass motherfucker! He hurt my fucking feelings!! THAT’S RIGHT! HE WENT ON HIS STUPID FUCKING PODCAST, AND HE SAID HE DREAMED THAT WE LOOKED STUPID ON A GAMESHOW. That’s so fucking disgusting, so now, i’m making a callout post on my tumblr. MAXX PHOENIX!! I BET YOU GOT A SMALL DICK! I BET IT’S THE SIZE A WALNUT, EXCEPT WAY FUCKING SMALLER!!!! Guess what, If I had a dong, here is what it would look like!!

THAT’S RIGHT, BABY!! TALL POINTS, NO QUILLS, NO PILLOWS, LOOK AT THIS, IT LOOKS LIKE SOME BALLS AND A FUCKING BONG!!! He fucked my feelings, so guess what, I’m going to fuck the The Price is Right, this is what they get, MY SUPER SOLARIAN PISS. Except i’m not stopping at the Price is right. Im going higher, the Winx are pissing on the ENTIRE GAMESHOW INDUSTRY. GAMESHOW FUCKING MARATHON!!!! SOON OUR PISS DROPLETS WILL HIT THE FUCKING TWITCH TV. NOW FUCK OFF BEFORE I PISS ON YOU TOO!

You blink.”Wow!” You say. “Yeah, I never knew the Winx Club XD were that petty,” said Octavia. Vinyl gave a light groan. Tavi stroked her head. “Oh, Vinyl. What goes on in that beautiful head off yours?” She inquired. Unbeknownst to any of you three, Tecna was watching you from afar. She quietly got up and left. “Well Anon, she said to herself. “Looks like you are...the weakest link...”

A few hours later….

The Shadowbolts (Lemon Zest, Indigo Zap, Sugarcoat, and Sour Sweet ) walked down the street, followed closely by Fluer Dis Lee, who looked, all out of sorts.

“Fluer, what’s up? We never thought you’d be hanging with us, we thought you’d be out on a date with Fancy Pants” said Indigo. Fleur sighed, “Well, first off, Fancy is a flaming homosexual, and so am I! Second, I feel like we’re being watched,” she said. “Watched? What are you talking about, Fluer?” Said Lemon Zest. As if on cue, the Shadowbolts stopped in their tracks. There standing in front of them, there was none, other then Tecna and Aisha. “Hello, girlys!” Said Tecna. “What do you want, Tecna?” Asked Fluer. “In a few moments, one of you is going to be...THE WEAKEST LINK! Anyone who tries to run will be given a Keith Lee style Pounce to the bounce by my associate here,” Tecna said, pointing to Aisha. “They can’t catch all of us, RUN BITCHES RUN!!” Said Fluer. The Shadowbolts all split up, and Fluer went the other way. Tecna and Aisha dashed forward, with Tecna appearing right in front of Zapp and Zest, and tasered them to the ground, before doing the same thing on Sugarcoat and Sour Sweet. Fleur ran down some steps, but Aisha transported beside her, and pounced her into a bush. The five girls were now down, ann dazed, as the two fairy assailants stood over them.

One Hour Later…

You finally managed to get a hold of Flash Sentry, and you two are in current negotiations of him joining the team. “So, become part of the team like the Rainbooms? Sounds interesting. Sign me up,” said Flash. As if on cue, Flora jumped out of a nearby plant, grabbing you and Flash with a plethora of vines. Everything around you seems to black out. When you wake up, you see Flash, Octavia, Lemon Zest, Sugarcoat, Sour Sweet, and Fluer around you. You get up, dust yourself off, and check your surroundings. “Okay, where the hell are we?” You question. Your answer seems to come in the form Aisha. “Would you please come with me?” She said. “Yeah? And why shouldn't we just kick your ass right here and now?!’” Said Zest. Aisha sighed. “You know damn well that would not win this fight, and if you try to run, you will bask in my glory,” Aisha said flatly. “I see,” Zest said, defeated. Aisha led the way, leading you and the group to a dark soundstage with 8, blue familier podiums. Fluer slowly turns her head to meet you and the group. “Oh fuck, We’re about to play The Goddamned Weakest Link,” she said. “Let’s just play along until we can go,” Flash suggested. Tecna entered the room. “Ah, I see you’ve all put two and two together! You see your names, go to them,” she says. You all do what she does she says. You and Fleur sense a presence sense, and look back. Behind you lot, are the Winx Club of Dimension S8, sitting akwardly. “Um, why are they here?” Asked Sugarcoat. “They’re here for analytics!” Tecna Zenith explained. “I see…” You say with a sigh. Tecna cleared her throat. “Anyway, as you mean have guess, we’re about to play the Weakest Link. “The lights then dimmed as Tecna spoke again. “This is part of a special pilot for a special marathon we’re doing, call it, beta testing,” she explained. “So, we’re like beta testers for Stella’s petty little vanity project?” Said Sugarcoat. “Well, yeah,” Tecna said. “Now, the rules are simple. Work together to correctly answer as many questions. Each question you get correct, you progress up the chain.

If you answer wrong, you break the chain, and lose the money. If you say BANK before I ask to question, you can bank to money you’ve earned, but you then must start a new chain. At the end of each round, you will vote for the weakest links. Do I need to repeat anything?” Said Tecna. “I think we all got it,” said Octavia. “Well, Iwould hope so. Let’s play, THE WEAKEST LINK!!”

Fluer and Anon looked at each other, then you, the reader of this story. “Well, here we go.”

“Hey, readers, will you help us keep our cool?”

Round 1

Tecna clapped her hands together to start the round. She then turned her attention to the slightly intrepid Flash Sentry.

"Okay, Flash."

"Bank!"

Tecna simply blinked as the others looked disappointingly. You and Fluer look at each other, then to Flash, who looks embarrassed.

"Flash, duderino! There's nothing to bank. Come on, I made the hashtag #GiveFlashAChance for you! Don't ruin this!" You said.

Flash rubbed the back of his head. "S-sorry!" He said.

"It's fine, Flashy Boi. Let's reset the round," said Tecna. The clock reset, and began the round once more.

"Flash, the phrase much used by football pundits is 'early windows' or 'early doors'?" She asked

"Early windows?" Said Flash.

"Wrong! Early doors! Octavia, cognac is a fine brandy made from the juice of which fruit?" Asked Tecna

"Grape?" Said Tavi.

"Correct! Lemon Zest, what 'P' is the Spanish word for quick and is used in English to mean 'at once'?" Asked Tecna

"Pronto?" said Zest.

"That's correct, Zesty Baby" Tecna shot a sultry grin at her.

"Please don't call me that," Lemon said, flatly.

"Whatever. Sugarcoat, Tunis is the capital city of which North African country?"

Sugarcoat rolled her eyes before saying, "Uhh, Tunisia?"

"That's correct, Sour Sweet. Who became US president when Nixon resigned?"

"Gerald Ford?" Said Sour.

"That's right," said Tecna, who turned to a glaring Fluer.

"Fluer, What 'L' is the name given to the poet who wins the Nobel prize?"

"Leaf!" said Fluer.

"That's right," Finally, Tecna turned to you.

"Your last, Anon," she said.

"Lay it on me, Techy Baby."

"Alright, you cheeky motherfucker. Anon, The Groucho Marx film is called 'Animal..' what?"

Luckily, you saw this film last night.

"Crackers. Animal Crackers" You say.

"That's correct!" Said Tecna.

With that, the round ended.

"Achievement unlocked, round complete. Myself, you run the analytics, while our contestants vote off...the weakest link!" Said Tecna.

The Tecna of Dimension Du8 opened her laptop. "Well, Flash Sentry is the only one who answered wrong. Even if he was correct, he banked with nothing," she said.

Tecna Zentih clapped her hands together. "Okay, let's see who has the smallest dick or tits," she said.

You reveal your card" It's Lemon Zest.

As for everyone else. Well.

"Flash."

"Flash."

"Flash."

"Flash."

"Flash."

Tecna laughed.

The fuck, you guys?" Said Flash.

"Flash, you literally banked when there was nothing to bank!" Said Octavia.

"Well, Flash, it looks like you have the smallest pecker, now get the fuck off my stage," said Tecna. Flash Sentry slowly walked off the stage. As he passed, the Winx of Du8 gave him a comforting pat on the back.

Flash's Confessional

"Sorry guys, I just was not up to task! But fuck you Tecna, your mother was not complaining last week, bitch!"