Chapters Chapter 2.5
“Pinkie, it’s getting late and I really need some sleep. Tomorrow is the last day before the holidays start. The last day of my shitty job.”
Mike said as he turned off the laptop.
It had been half an hour since the encounter with Pinkie Pie.
“Okay!” The pink pony jumped up and looked around. “So where can I sleep?”
Pinkie asked with a puzzled look.
Mike began to look around as well.
“Well… It has to be somewhere my parents can’t see you. So I gue-“
He was interrupted by Pinkie jumping on his bed.
“How about here? I could sleep here!”
Pinkie Pie said with a wide smile on her face, jumping up and down on the bed.
Mike gave a disapproving glance at the pony that was bouncing on his bed.
“Please keep it down. And no, you cannot sleep on my bed, for obvious reasons.”
Pinkie now had her ears flat on her head.
“Sorry, I’m just really tired.”
Mike said apologetically.
“Just let me think for a second.”
The pink pony jumped off the bed and began looking around it.
“Hey, Another playboy.”
Pinkie said to herself as she found a magazine next to the bed, partially hidden under a couple of books.
She immediately began browsing through it again.
Mike was still considering possible places where Pinkie could sleep, without getting noticed by his parents.
“..no, the closet is too small for her to actually sleep in…”
He continued crossing off possibilities as he rubbed his temples his thumbs.
“Ooh, the middle of the page has a poster!”
Pinkie said excitedly.
Mike, still oblivious to what the pink pony was doing finally came to a conclusion.
“Pinkie, you can sleep under my desk if you want to?”
He turned around to face Pinkie Pie.
“Is that okay with you, just until I find a better solu- What are you reading there?”
Pinkie looked up and quickly hid the magazine. "Nothing! So what were you saying?" Pinkie asked with an innocent smile.
Mike shrugged it off. "Right, you can sleep under the desk, until I come up with some other place, this will have to do for now.”
Pinkie glanced over to the desk.
"Under the desk?" She said, frowning her eyes.
"Just until I find another place for you to sleep."
Mike responded.
Pinkie Pie pondered the idea. "Okay then!"
"I'll get you some cushions and a blanket."
Mike said.
He walked out the door, silently. Luckily the closet containing all the blankets and cushions was right next to his room.
As Mike disappeared out of Pinkie Pie’s eyesight she grabbed the playboy magazine again, immediately browsing through it.
Eventually Mike returned with his arms full of pillows, cushions and 3 blankets.
Much to his shock; Pinkie was lying on his bed with the playboy, the poster was folded out.
Mike sighed. "Oh come on, I thought I told you not to read that?"
Pinkie turned her head around; the smile she was bearing a moment ago was now transformed in a guilty look.
"But.. But I.."
She stammered.
"It was right next to your bed! It was opened up, so I thought it wouldn't matter."
Mike's face turned red.
"Why did you have it next to your bed anyway? I thought these magazines were bad?" Pinkie continued
"Okay, fine. Read the playboys all you want. Just make sure my parents don't find them."
"Thanks!" Pinkie responded cheerfully
She continued reading on the bed while Mike set up her 'bed' for the night under the desk.
"Well, she just took away my 'me time'." Mike thought to himself.
As he put down a few pillows.
After a few minutes of work Mike was finally finished.
He walked over to the bed and noticed that the pink pony had fallen asleep.
"Well, fuck. How am I going to get her under the desk now?" Mike groaned to himself.
Mike took the playboy, rolled it up and began prodding Pinkie Pie, but with little success; The only thing he got pinkie to do was wave her hooves as if trying to swat flies and roll over on her side.
He shrugged and put down the playboy.
"How do you lift a pony anyway?" Mike thought. "Like a dog?"
"Well, only one way to find out." He moved his arms under the pink pony's back and tried to lift her; Not as easy as he thought it would be, even for a pony the size of large dog she was pretty heavy.
As Mike struggled to keep his balance while holding a pony in his arms he finally stood up straight.
He walked over to the desk, this part was surprisingly easy.
As Mike bent through his knees to move her onto her makeshift bed under the desk he heard a thud; Pinkie's head had bumped into one of the desks legs.
The pink pony merely rubbed her head with a hoof and laid her head against Mike's chest.
Mike immediately felt a sense of protective instinct take him over.
He knew he had to keep her safe from this cold world.
Mike laid his hand on Pinkie's head and carefully put her in her bed.
He made sure to wrap a few extra blankets around here.
Pinkie Pie began stirring in her sleep, trying to adjust to the new, less comfortable bed.
Mike stroked the sleeping pony's mane and began walking back to his bed.
"This sleep deprivation is making me all sentimental." Mike thought to himself as he put on his pyjamas.
He slid under the covers of his bed and turned off the lights.
"Goodnight Pinkie Pie."
***
Chapter 3
“Girls..”
Mike heard faintly as he began to slowly breach the wall to his waking life.
“Girls?”
The voice became clearer.
“HEY GIRLS, I’M OVER HERE! CAN’T YOU SEE ME?!”
“Holy fucking shit!”
Mike screamed as he woke up violently.
He was lying on his side and felt something leaning on him, he turned his head up.
It was Pinkie Pie on his bed, hanging over Mike, with her fore-hooves dangling over his side.
“Oh, it’s you..” Mike managed to mumble, about to doze off again.
"Uhuh, yup! Do you know why they aren't responding?" Pinkie tried to prod Mike awake.
"Who, who are you talking about?" Mike asked sleepily, his eyes closing.
"Duh! My friends! On that big shiny box!" She pointed at the TV.
"That's just a television, what you see there is just for people to watch, not to communicate. Now please, let me sleep, I need to leave to work at eleven." Mike sighed as he tried to push the pink pony off of him.
"Okie Dokie Lokey! I'm just going to get something to eat, is that okay?" Pinkie asked as she stepped over Mike and jumped off the bed.
"Sure just clean up after your- Wait, are my parents still here?" Mike asked as he started to stir awake.
"No, silly! They left an hour ago!" Pinkie chirped as she stood in front of Mike.
"Then go ahead.." Mike finally uttered before he turned to his other side and drifted off to sleep again.
Pinkie Pie cheerfully bounced over to the kitchen and began searching the drawers for food. Eventually she ended up at the fridge.
Mike finally awoke by the buzzing of his alarm clock. He looked over to it; 10.00 AM.
He turned off the alarm and sat upright on the bed.
"Ugh, Pinkie left the TV on." Mike groaned as he rubbed his eyes and turned off the TV.
He put his slippers on and slouched over to the kitchen, where loud munching noises came from.
He finally arrived at the kitchen and found a pink pony scavenging his fridge for food.
Mike stretched out his arms and began yawning. "Morning Pinkie."
"Gwod mownin' Mike" Pinkie Pie responded with a mouthful of food.
More munching sounds erupted from the fridge, as well as the sounds of plastic bags being opened.
"Uhm, Pinkie? What are you eating?" Mike asked with a hint of worry in his voice.
Pinkie swallowed the food she was chewing on. "I found a lot of packages with this!" She held up a slice of meat, and to make it worse, it was smoked horse meat. Mike recognized it from the color and smell.
"Damn, that's disturbing, cupcakes style." Mike thought to himself, shivering of just the thought.
Pinkie was about to take another slice but Mike quickly took it away. She looked at Mike, with a sarcastic look on her face.
"Why did you take that away? Was it over dated?"
Mike shook his head.
"Well.. Do you know what meat tastes like?"
Pinkie's pupils started to get smaller "No..?" Pinkie asked with doubt trembling her voice.
"You're eating horse meat right now." Mike responded.
Pinkie Pie's hair deflated and her face began to take a green hue.
"Where is the little filly's room?" She asked, her voice sounding like she could throw up any moment.
Mike hung his head and simply pointed at a door in the hallway.
Pinkie quickly galloped over to the toilet, Mike followed suit; He had experienced plenty of girls chugging down a few too much at parties and he more than often had to keep their hair back to prevent them from throwing up on it.
A few uncomfortable minutes of puking later, a dishevelled looking Pinkie Pie walked out.
Mike felt bad for her; he should've known that she was eventually going to eat something hazardous, in this case meat.
He tried to comfort Pinkie Pie, but as soon as he approached her she flinched away.
Mike looked concerned. "W-what's wrong? Did I do something wrong?" He stuttered out.
Pinkie gulped. "Why was there meat in your fridge?" She brought out with a terrified look in her eyes.
Mike perched down and looked the pony in the eyes.
"I thought you somehow knew this, but humans are not herbivores like you, and other ponies. We're omnivores, we also eat meat."
This didn't help at all, as it only made the pink pony cower into a corner.
"Okay look, if I was really going to hurt you, wouldn't I have done that sooner? I really mean no harm."
Mike said with a comforting smile.
"Well, I guess so."
Pinkie Pie responded with a sad tone.
Mike doubtfully held out his arms for a comforting hug.
He immediately flinched away as Pinkie bit his arm.
"Ow!" Mike yelled out; She bit down pretty hard and blood was dripping out of the bite-mark.
"Why did you do that?!" He scowled at the pink pony.
"What? You're just meat, right?" She snarls at Mike.
Her expression filled with hatred immediately changed to a look of concern and regret.
Pinkie realized her wrong here.
"I-I didn't mean to do that! I'm so sorry! Are you okay?"
She asked with sorrow in her voice.
"It's..it’s fine. You're just ill, that's all. Herbivores aren't supposed to eat meat."
Mike sighed out, grabbing some toilet paper and dabbing his wound.
Pinkie immediately jumped up to Mike and embraced him.
He stumbled back, thinking about how Pinkie bit him last time.
He looked at the pink pony that was now hugging him tightly.
"Pinkie, I already said I’m fine." Mike said with an uncomfortable smile.
"B-but what about the blood? I've never seen anyone bleed like that before!" She responded with a look mixed of confusion and horror on her face.
"Really? You should've seen me when I fell off of the roof when I was cleaning the gutter, my leg nearly got torn off and-"
Pinkie disregarded it and just hugged him tighter.
"Okay.. From the show I wouldn't have guessed that Pinkie Pie could be THIS emotional." Mike thought to himself awkwardly.
He looked at the clock in the hallway; It had been 45 minutes already since Pinkie had her little episode.
"Oh crap. Pinkie, I don't mind the hug and all, but I’m going to get late for my job at the supermarket and I still need to eat, shower and get dressed."
"Oh, let me take care of the food for you then!" Pinkie responded while Her mane immediately regained its full volume and a bright smile had appeared on her face again.
"That's okay, really, you just need to rest a little. You might still be sick, you can go and lay down on the couch on the living room, my parents won't be back until eight anyway, just make sure you close the curtains."
"Really? Because it's really no biggie! Do you like corn-cakes?" She asked, Bouncing around.
Mike was just confused about this sudden personality change, but after all, this was Pinkie Pie.
“I’ll handle it all, you just need to rest a little.” He called out as he walked upstairs.
As Mike set foot to the second floor he quickly remembered something. "The dog is still in the room!"
He quickly ran downstairs but made sure not to fall like last time.
The dog wasn't aggressive, but she could suddenly bite if she got startled.
Mike set foot to the first floor and quickly ran through the hallway, to the living room.
He stood in the door opening and saw Pinkie Pie walking up to the sleeping dog.
The dog opened its eyes and began to growl.
"Whoa there!" Mike yelled out as he pulled Pinkie away from the dog.
"I was just gonna pet it, honest!" Pinkie called out after Mike as he quickly took the dog to the kennel.
"Promise me that you won't get the dog out of her kennel?" Mike said, putting on a serious face while staring Pinkie Pie in the eyes.
Pinkie sat on her haunches.
"Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcakes in my eye!" She exclaimed, while making the appropriate gestures, finishing her 'Pinkie Promise' with a hoof in her eye.
"Okay, well I need to hurry now." Mike ran back upstairs.
"Okie dokie lokey!" Pinkie Pie yelled to Mike as she walked into the kitchen.
Mike got upstairs, grabbed 2 towels from the hamper, entered the bathroom and turned on the water.
Meanwhile in the kitchen, Pinkie was looking through the drawers again, looking for flour, salt and corn kernels.
She finally gathered all the ingredients and began to search for a bowl.
Mike finally had all his clothes off and stepped under the shower.
"Like granny Pie said, always wash your hooves before you get to baking!" Pinkie said to herself as she let the warm water flow through the faucet.
"Gah! God this is cold!" Mike yelled out as he quickly moved out from under the shower.
He stuck out a hand under the streams of cold water and after a few second he felt it heat up again.
"Stupid boiler." Mike groaned to himself as he took place under the shower again.
"Hmm.. I wonder where they keeps the eggs.. Ah! there!" Pinkie finally yelled out as she grabbed 3 eggs from the egg box on the kitchen counter.
After mixing all the ingredients, and making a huge mess, she walked over to the stove and got a pan from out of a nearby drawer.
The pinkie pony grabbed a bottle of vegetable oil conveniently lying next to the stove and poured a good part of it in the pan.
She turned on the stove she bounced back to the her corn-cake mix and began to stir it some more.
Seven minutes later Mike was done showering.
"i'ng suwe 'ike 'ill like these!" Pinkie chirped, holding a plate with freshly baked corn-cake between her teeth as she carefully walked upstairs.
Mike stepped out of the shower cabin and began to dry his hair first.
The bathroom door quickly opened. "Look 'hat I got fow you!" A cheerful Pinkie Pie yelled as she stood in the door-opening of the bathroom, still holding the plate in her mouth..
"Pinkie!" Mike yelled as he grabbed another towel to cover his privates.
"Ever heard of knocking?!" He continued with shock in his voice.
Pinkie Pie put down the plate. "I made you some corn-cakes!"
"And that is very nice of you, but can I at least get some privacy while I towel myself off?" Mike said, still clumsily covering himself with a towel.
"Oh, okay then!" The pink pony responded before she picked up the plate again.
Mike closed the door. "Thanks."
Mike let out a sigh of relief and began to dry the rest of his body. All of a sudden Pinkie threw the door back open asking, "Are you done now?". Mike jumped in surprise and quickly re-wrapped the towel around his waist. "Pinkie!" he yelled, "Get out! I'll tell you when I'm done!" "Fine.. No need to be such a Grumpy old no-pants!" She responded.
"I wish my parents would just buy a lock for this door." Mike complained in his thoughts.
Five minutes later Mike walked downstairs, fully dressed.
Pinkie was waiting in the living room, intently staring at the TV screen; She was watching The Hub.
"Hey, Pinkie. I got to get going now, be careful and try not to make a mess when I’m gone, okay?"
"Wait! Can’t I come with you?" Pinkie asked with puppy-dog eyes.
"I'm sorry, but you really can't. First off, I don't have a driver's license or my own car, second, I have to go by bike, and I can't just bring you out in public, I cannot foresee what will happen but I doubt anything good will come of it." Mike said as he grabbed his coat and backpack.
"I'll make it up to you when I get back, I’m taking you're pretty bored here."
"Ooh! What are we gonna do? Party? Baking? Pulling pranks?!" The pink pony yelled out excitedly.
"Do you like video games?" Mike asked as he opened the door. Pinkie Pie gave him a puzzled look. "See you in five hours." Mike finally said before he closed the door after him.
"Bye!" The pink pony responded.
Chapter 4
"Oh God, what was I thinking?" Mike said under his breath.
He didn't even arrive at his work yet, and already began to worry about what Pinkie was going to inflict upon his house.
"I should've just made myself coffee, at least I wouldn't have left her home like that"
Mike was waiting for the traffic-lights to turn green.
"What if she DOES let the dog out? No, she Pinkie Pie swore she wouldn't."
He continued to plague himself with worst case scenarios.
"Hey! Some people are trying to get to work here!"
A large bald man yelled at Mike from his scooter.
Mike snapped out of his thoughts.
"Right! Sorry." He uttered, clumsily climbing back on his bike.
"Damn kids and their drugs.." The man mumbled angrily.
"Well, this day is starting off great already!" Mike thought to himself sarcastically as he crossed the road.
He finally arrived at the supermarket.
This was it, the final day of work at this place.
Mike walked in with his backpack hanging over one of his shoulders.
He was late, but he tried to play it off nonchalantly.
He walked over to the staff room; He had to get his supermarket outfit on.
“Bro! Late as always!” A gawky looking guy called out.
“ ‘Sup Kevin?” Mike responded, giving Kevin a bro-fist.
“Nothing much man. So, watched the latest episode of ‘you know what’ this morning?”
Kevin asked, prodding Mike with his elbow.
"Nah, I slept through it. It got kinda late last night." Mike said as he put on his working clothes.
Kevin sat down, put his feet on the table and took a sip out of the coffee mug that was standing there.
"Confound these ponies, they drive me to insomnia." He teasingly said to Mike as he brought the mug down from his mouth.
Mike buttoned up his shirt, put on his clip-on tie and turned around to face Kevin.
“I guess you could say that.”
* * *
“..It's a good thi-“
“Today's top story; strange weather phenomena have been observed ar-“
“-ow did they get here? Aliens.”
Pinkie Pie sat on the couch as she zapped through the channels, intently staring at each different channel for no more than a second or two.
“Ah! Animal Planet?” Pinkie Pie asked.
"The lion found its prey, this is the part where absolute stealth is required."
"Prey?" She tilted her head.
"One of the younger zebras notices the predator and alerts the herd."
"Uh oh." She brought out with a soft voice.
"The lion decides that the waiting game is over and makes a run for the zebra-foal."
"Oh no! Is that family of Zecora? Is this where she comes from?" Pinkie yelled out, Covering one of her eyes with her hoof.
"..the foal just wasn't fast enough, and the lion has gotten himself a nice lunch."
Pinkie quickly turned off the TV and sighed in relief.
She jumped off the couch.
"I wonder if there is anything tasty to drink." Pinkie thought out loud.
She walked over to the liquor cabinet.
*Sniff* "Hmm, sweet!" Pinkie yelled out.
She grabbed one of the handles of the closet doors with her teeth. She opened it up.
"Ooh! Bottles! Let's see..." Pinkie curiously said.
The pink pony read one of the labels.
"Cherry liquor?” She tapped the underside of her muzzle with her hoof. “I LOVE CHERRIES!".
* * *
“Dude, want to go gaming at my place after work?”
Kevin asked as he awkwardly tried to lift a crate of milk-cartons into the dairy-racks.
“Let me help you with that”
Mike said. He pulled up his sleeves.
Kevin looked at Mike approaching him.
“Thanks, I nearly dropped th- Wow, man, how did you get that bite mark?”
Mike quickly supported the crate as Kevin nearly lost hold of it.
“Nothing, just my dog. I startled it.” He quickly lied.
He forgot to put some gauze on it.
“Isn’t that dangerous? Like, couldn’t you get that disease? Tite.. Tatin..Tet--“
“--Tetanus?” Mike cut in. “I’m not worrying too much abou-“
“--When did you get the bite? It looks pretty deep.”
Kevin interrupted as he glanced over to the wound.
“This morning, but really, it’s not that big of a deal.”
Mike finally said, slightly annoyed as he pushed the crate in the rack.
“He’s got a point though, it might get infected.”
Kevin picked up another crate, this time with a firmer hold.
"So do you want to go gaming at my place later on, or not?"
He said as he shoved the crate onto the rack.
"I've got some stuff to do at home man, I don't think I’ll be able to." Mike said; He had promised to go play video games with her, and He wasn't quite sure about Kevin meeting Pinkie. At least, not yet.
Kevin nodded understandingly, looking a little disappointed.
"Ah! Mike Finley." A low voice sounded from around the corner of the isle.
It was Mike's boss, Mr Thompson; A rather plump man in his late 50's. Mike always felt that this man had a good aura around him.
"Your contract expires today, and as a formal standard I must say my goodbyes and thanks." Mr Thompson chuckled.
"In all seriousness though, I always felt like I could count on you with whatever task was at hand. I hate to see you go, you're a good kid." He said as he patted Mike on his shoulder.
"Sir, I’m eighteen."
Mike responded, bearing an awkward smile.
"I know son, and you're a good kid."
Mr Thompson responded as he looked up.
"I remember when I was around your age, my father founded this supermarket, back then it was just a small store."
As he slowly looked down he noticed the bite-mark on Mike's arm.
"Good God, son! What is that on your arm?" Mr Thompson called out, a shocked look on his face.
"Told you it looked pretty serious, dude" Kevin said from behind Mike.
Mike glared at Kevin.
"Just a little wound, I got bitten by my dog."
He said, still looking at Kevin, slightly annoyed.
"That could get infected, you know? I'll have to send you home, maybe you can get it checked out by a doctor." Mr Thompson said, still somewhat worried.
"Sir, really, I’m fine." Mike said, rolling his sleeves back over his wrists.
"I'll make sure you'll get the salary for a full day of work, just go home and get it checked out. I don't want you to leave thinking that I’d let you work here despite having serious injuries." Mr Thompson insisted with a warm smile on his face.
"Well, okay then. Thanks."
Mike shook Mr Thompson's hand.
“Bye sir. See you around, Kevin.”
* * *
Mike walked out of the store after finally changing back to his regular clothing.
As he went to unlock his bike it started to drizzle.
“Ugh...It’s already cold as hell out here.”
He complained as he got onto his bike.
Just as sudden as the drizzle started, a clearance occurred.
“That’s more like it”
Mike thought to himself with a content look on his face.
As He went cycling on his way home, to check on Pinkie Pie, he noticed that the heavy overcast from just a few minutes earlier had nearly disappeared.
Mike shrugged it off and continued to head home.
After a 15 minute bike ride, Mike he got home. He noticed that the curtains where still closed. "Oh God I hope that she didn't mess up my house." Mike said as he pushed the key in the door-lock and twisted it.
He stepped inside; all the lights were out.
Mike looked around. "Hello? Pinkie, I got home early."
No response.
Mike began to worry and quickened his walking pace to the living room
As he closed in on the door he heard muffled music.
He prepared for the worst and slowly opened the door.
The sight was pretty bad.
In the living room, in front of the stereo lay Pinkie Pie.
She had a half empty bottle of cherry liquor in her hoof,
And somehow her party cannon was standing next to her.
The room was littered with balloons and confetti.
And one way or another, she got a bunch of disco-lights,
Wildly shining different colored lights all over the living room.
"Why was I expecting this?" Mike said to himself as he turned on the lights.
He walked over to the drunk, sleeping pink pony and squatted down next to her.
"Pinkie?"
He poked Pinkie Pie a few times.
She stirred awake.
"Wha.. who..." She managed to bring out before falling asleep again.
Mike prodded Pinkie again.
Her eyes opened this time, well, as much as you could call them open.
"Hey stranger, what brings you to my cupcake fort?" She slurred.
"Pinkie, it's me, Mike."
He said, squinting his eyes.
"Mike take a hike, Bwahahahaha!" She began to laugh out loud.
"Right, this is getting ridiculous. Just get up so we can get you sob--"
"--I am the Queen, of, of the cupcake fort and I decide what I will and will not do!"
Pinkie Pie interrupted him.
"Uhm.. Pinkie? This is my house. And you're wasted." Mike said somewhat amused.
The pink pony leaned forward a little. "I will not tolerate that kind of talk!" She took another chug of the liquor and fell on her back again. "Guard, get thish intruder out of here." She pointed a hoof at Mike.
"O-Kay… I'll just get you some honey. Pretty sure that worked the last time I was drunk."
As soon as he reached for the door handle he felt that something bit him in his calves.
Mike jumped up and quickly looked down to where he felt the bite.
A rather small, green reptile, with a pan on its head had clamped onto his leg.
Mike had a puzzled look on his face. "Gummy? How did he get here?" He looked over to Pinkie Pie; she was asleep again, snoring loudly this time. Mike struggled to get Gummy off of his leg.
He was getting agitated.
Then suddenly he realized something.
He limped upstairs, Gummy still attached to his leg.
5 minutes later he came back down with an old fish-tank.
He limped over to the kitchen and filled the tank with water.
As soon as the water tank was filled, Mike put it on the kitchen floor and held his leg just above the tank, dipping Gummy’s tail in the water.
He finally let go of Mike’s leg.
“Well, that’s one problem solved”
Mike said to himself as he looked at the little alligator floating in the water.
He walked back to the living room and approached the pink pony that was still sleeping like a brick.
He carefully knelt down next to her and picked her up in his arms.
Having already done this before, he kind of got the hang of it already.
Mike figured that since he had to clean the living room from all the confetti and cake, it was best to bring Pinkie upstairs.
As he walked over to the stairs, Pinkie cradled in his arms, he glanced over to the kitchen; Gummy was still in the fish-tank.
Mike began walking upstairs and noticed that Pinkie Pie's snores became even louder.
When he got upstairs he walked over to his room, opened the door, and carefully laid the pink pony on his bed.
"Pinkie, wake up. I got something that will reduce the drunkenness." Mike said as he tried to lightly shake the pink pony awake.
She was fast asleep.
"I'll just get her the honey later, right now I got cleaning to do." Mike thought as he walked out of his room and back downstairs.
When he got downstairs he walked over to the cupboard and grabbed the vacuum cleaner.
"This is gonna take while" Mike sighed as he opened the door to the living room.
Pinkie Pie slowly woke up; A large drool stain had formed on the pillow.
She groaned.
“Ugh.. My head hurts…”.
Pinkie said under her breath as she moved a hoof up to her throbbing temples.
“I need some sugar..”
She said as she pulled a face of disgust after discovering the taste in her mouth.
Pinkie Pie looked over to the nightstand.
"Ah, some honey would do good!" She exclaimed, suddenly sounding a lot better.
* * *
Mike had just finished cleaning all the confetti and balloons.
He looked at the party cannon.
"How... Just… How am I going to hide that thing" He wondered to himself.
He slowly and cautiously walked over to the cannon, afraid that it might suddenly go off.
Mike stopped just inches away from it.
He kept staring at the cannon.
He slowly moved his hand to the cannon and tapped it a few times; nothing happened.
Mike gave a sigh of relief. "I'll just stuff it in the shed."
As He rolled Pinkie Pie's party cannon over to the door leading to the backyard he heard several noises coming from upstairs. "Must be Pinkie, she probably just woke up." Mike told himself as he opened the door.
The backyard was a mess as always; it was littered with pieces of chopped wood, and gopher holes.
The old shed was located in one corner, surrounded by a couple of bushes.
As Mike dragged the cannon through all the pieces of wood he slowly took notice of the weight that the cannon possessed.
"How does Pinkie keep this with her all the time? Not to mention, where does she keep it?" Mike wondered as he began to struggle with its weight.
Luckily he began to close in on the shed.
After a few more tiresome drags, he made it.
He opened the shed, and immediately noticed that there was a big empty spot, right next to the lawnmower.
Satisfied with the fact that he didn't have to move a bunch of stuff again he rolled the party cannon inside and covered it with a big blanket.
Mike walked back into the house to check on Pinkie.
As he walked upstairs he heard more noises coming from his room.
"I hope she isn't feeling too sick" Mike thought to himself, still walking the stairs.
He opened the door and found just the opposite of a SICK pony.
Pinkie Pie was sitting on the bed, with a nearly empty jar of honey.
Half of which was spread across her face, her mane, and the bed sheets.
"I'm taking that you feel better?" Mike said with a monotone voice; now he had even more work to do.
"Mhm! I'm just a little sticky, that's all!" Pinkie said as she looked around. "Sorry about your bed!"
"I'll just clean that." Mike sighed.
"Hey Pinkie, can you do me a favor?"
"Sure, I guess. What is it?" Pinkie said, looking a little guilty.
"Well, I'd rather not have other stuff covered in honey, so can you maybe clean yourself up a little?" Mike asked, a little unsure on how to formulate his question.
"Oh, I was already gonna do that! Can you imagine if I didn't? I'd be sticky all day!" Pinkie giggled as she jumped off the bed.
"Thanks." Mike called out to Pinkie as she walked out of the room. "Oh, the towels are in the door next to m--" "--Found them!" Pinkie chirped as she grabbed a towel.
With a grin on his face Mike took the jar of honey and put it back on the nightstand.
He grabbed the honey covered sheets and took them to the washer downstairs.
* * *
Meanwhile in the bathroom, Pinkie turned on the hot water tap.
"Hmm, this is gonna take some time...". Pinkie Pie said as she inspected the size of the tub. She began opening cabinets.
"There's got to be some shampoo here..."
* * *
"...40 degrees Celsius and... Start."
Mike walked back to the kitchen; Gummy was hopefully still in the old fish tank.
Luckily, Gummy was indeed still in the fish tank. Mike sighed. He slowly and steadily picked up the fish tank, containing the little pet alligator and quite an amount of water.
"Ugh.". He awkwardly moved himself upstairs, clumsily holding the fish tank, but still having a good grip on it.
About 5 minutes of careful footing and balancing later he made it upstairs.
Mike took a couple more steps towards his bedroom and walked over to his desk, still holding the fish tank containing Gummy.
He put the fish tank behind the desk and gave a sigh of relief as he arched his back.
“That’s enough lifting for today.”
Chapter 5
“Ow! Ow! Ow! Ouch!”
A bunch of painful sounding shrieks erupted from the bathroom.
Mike picked up the sounds as he was replacing the bed sheets.
“What now?”
He uttered as he laid down the sheets.
He walked over to the bathroom at a steady pace.
“Is everything alright?”
Mike uttered with squinted eyes, knocking on the door.
“Ow this burns, Owowowowow!”
Pinkie continued to yell with panic sounding in her voice.
“Well, violating the privacy of a pony isn’t the worst thing I’ve done.”
Mike thought to himself as he took a deep breath.
He opened the door and took a big step in, covering his eyes with his hands.
“Wait, ponies don’t normally wear clothes.”
Mike shook his head, moved his hand away from his eyes and faced the pink pony who was frantically trying to rub the shampoo out of her eyes.
“Get it out get it out get it ou-ou-out!”
Pinkie continued to panic, on the verge of crying.
“What? What’s in your eyes?!”
Mike yelled out over Pinkie, beginning to panic as well.
“Shampoo, shampoo! Get it out! Owowowow!”
More erratic cries of pain sounded.
“What bottle, what bottle?!”
Mike now panicked, biting his nails.
Pinkie quickly pointed one hoof over to a lone flagon of shampoo; Head and shoulders.
Mike quickly took the flagon of shampoo and read the back of the label.
“Why would anypony have shampoo that burns like this?”
The pink pony was now crying, still trying to rub the shampoo out of her eyes.
“Okay, Pinkie. It says that you need to rinse it out with water as soon as possible.”
Mike took a few deep breaths, trying to recover from the panic.
“This might be painful, but you need to open your eyes for as long as you can.”
He continued, trying to sound as calm as possible.
“Please hurry!”
Pinkie said, with a little less panic.
Mike tilted Pinkie’s head slightly backwards and moved the wet mane away from her eyes.
The pink pony’s breathing speed was increasing as she tried to keep her eyes open, despite the burning sensation.
Mike took a little bit of water in his hands and carefully poured it over Pinkie’s eyes.
He continued doing this on her other eye.
Pinkie Pie blinked a couple of times, her eyes well still red from the irritation the shampoo caused.
“Better?”
Mike asked with a worried look on his face as Pinkie Pie’s respiration became less erratic.
The pink pony nuzzled Mike as a thankful gesture.
“Now this is getting more and more uncomfortable.”
Mike thought to himself as he got back up.
“So I guess you’ll manage now?”
He asked as he slowly backed up.
"Yes sir!" Pinkie responded as she saluted Mike.
Mike closed the door and walked over to his room and sat down on his bed.
He pinched the bridge of his nose as he tried was trying to figure out if he forgot anything.”
“I just changed the sheets, Pinkie sobered up as far as I can tell--”
He glanced over to the bathroom door.
“--, the room is cleaned, party cannon is hidden in the shed, Gummy is in a fish tank.”
Mike rubbed his eyes and started to yawn.
“I really need some coffee.”
He got up again and walked over to the stairway, he slowed his pace a little when he passed the bathroom door; just splashing sounds and humming.
* * *
*Ding!*
The little red light of the coffee maker dimmed.
“Finally.”
Mike thought, walking over to the fresh can of coffee.
He poured it into the mug, added some sugar and milk into and took it upstairs, to his room.
Mike was just about to take a sip, but then he looked at his alarm clock.
“Damn it, I had to walk the dog this morning”
He muttered as he felt a little agitated.
He put down the cup of coffee and walked downstairs once more.
“Leigha, it’s time for your walk.”
Mike said as he opened the door to the scullery.
The dog was impatiently walking in circles.
Mike quickly grabbed the leash from a hook on the wall behind him and opened the kennel door.
He put the leash on Leigha and closed the door.
Leigha began to wag her tail as Mike and her strolled down the drive-way, heading for the park.
* * *
"Stop -running!" Mike yelled as Leigha ran up the drive-way as fast as she could, nearly dragging mike over the street.
The dog finally slowed down as it closed in on the door.
Mike was exhausted.
As he opened the door he was still breathing like he was going to die any second.
Mike removed the belt from Leigha.
"HeyMike, Howareyoudoing?"
A high pitched voice rang.
Mike looked around to see where the sound came from.
Through the door of the living room bounced Pinkie Pie, seemingly more energetic than usual.
She quickly bounced over to Mike and Leigha.
Bad move.
Leigha began growling again, and without Mike being able to constrain her movement he helplessly watched the dog run for Pinkie Pie.
"Leigha, stay!" Mike bellowed at the dog as he ran after it. Leigha had already nailed Pinkie to the ground and was nipping her ear. Pinkie was lying on the floor, dead still from fear.
Mike quickly grabbed Leigha by her scruff and dragged her away, hard-handed.
He locked her up in the kennel, glaring at the dog.
Pinkie was now quivering with fear, still lying on the ground.
Mike approached her; he felt terrible about this.
"Pinkie, are you okay? Did she hurt you?" He stammered.
Pinkie was staring into vast nothingness; she was terrified.
Mike carefully laid a hand on Pinkie’s mane, trying to comfort her a little.
She began humming her “No Fear” song.
"Oh God, my dog broke her." Mike stared at Pinkie, wide-eyed.
"Please answer, please be okay. It was just the dog!" Mike began to panic; he had never experienced someone, let alone somepony lose their mind before his eyes.
Many emotions ran through him; he was mad at his dog, afraid of Pinkie Pie being scarred beyond recovery and other emotions he couldn't quite place.
He held the pink pony against him, trying to comfort her some more by stroking her mane.
"Pinkie, it was just the dog, please answer."
Mike nearly pleaded.
He began to hum along with Pinkie Pie's song.
Pinkie began to calm down.
"Ahh.. That's much better!" Pinkie suddenly said out loud.
Mike looked down at her with confusion.
"I-I thought that you were scarred f-for life."
He stuttered out, still dumbstruck from the sudden change of mood.
"Why would you think that?"
The pink pony asked with a puzzled look on her face as she got back onto her hoofs.
"Y-you were lying on the ground, struck with terror! You began humming to yourself!"
Mike still stumbled over his words, his eye began to twitch.
"I did?" Pinkie replied in disbelief.
"So you're fine? No shattered mindset? No mental imprints?"
Mike said, still having his eye twitch.
Pinkie shook her head, grin on her face.
"I guess that's how i deal with things!"
She giggled.
Mike was perplexed.
"I'm just going to take a nap now." Mike sighed; tired from everything that had happened over the span of just 15 minutes.
"Wait! Just before you left you said something about games?"
Pinkie exclaimed, grinning brightly.
"Board games, party games, card games, what kind of games?"
Mike hung his head.
"I did promise to show her video games."
He looked back at the pink pony, who was about to walk upstairs.
"Follow me." Mike finally spoke, kind of seeing the humor of what had just happened.
"This isn't anything like My Little Dashie."
He joked to himself, seeing the irony of it all.
As Mike held the door to his room open for Pinkie Pie, who pranced in happily, he felt content.
This was a little like 'My Little Dashie'. He felt protective of Pinkie.
Mike sat down on the bed.
An approving glance of Mike signaled Pinkie to take a sit.
She jumped on the bed and sat on her haunches, looking at the screen.
"Let me just turn it on."
Mike said as he remembered that he still had a cup of coffee standing on his nightstand.
He leaned forward to turn on the Nintendo Wii his nephew left in his room when he visited.
“I might as well just give her a fair advantage.”
He brought the mug to his mouth and began to tilt it.
The caffeine containing hot beverage that was supposed to be in the cup was not coming out.
As the Wii turned on, and the screen flickered for a few seconds, Pinkie focused from Mike, back to the screen.
Mike was tilting the mug further.
There was still no hot liquid pouring out of it.
He brought it away from his face and looked into the mug; it was empty, as he had now expected.
He looked over to Pinkie Pie, who was slowly turning her head, a hint of guilt slowly fading across her face.
Mike raised an eyebrow.
"Heh.. Oops. I thought that was for me."
Pinkie said with an awkward smile on her face, tapping her two front hoofs together.
"I thought it smelled weird, but I felt like it would be rude to turn down a drink."
"You know that stuff gives you an energy boost after it kicks in, right?"
Mike asked Pinkie, to which the pony shrugged.
"In this coffee you just drank?"
Mike continued.
"I thought you were just really bad at making chocolate milk!"
Pinkie retorted, grinning again.
Mike gave a reinsuring grin and laid the “Nun chucks” of the Wii in front of Pinkie.
“This will get worse before it gets better.”
His eye began to twitch again.
* * *
"Match point!" The announcer exclaimed. "Damn, I’m losing to a pony!" Mike thought as he Frantically tried to move the nun chuck.
"Ang ah doing goog?" Pinkie Pie mumbled with the controller between her teeth.
"You're doing, okay." Mike said as he glanced over to the scoreboard on the screen; 30 - 5.
"Yay! I hit the ball again!"
Pinkie beamed as she dropped the nun-chuck.
She quickly caught it before it with her mouth, before it hit the ground and swung it around again.
"Game!" The announcer finally said.
"Alright, best out of 6?" Mike asked as he put down the nun chuck.
"Sure! Tennis again? Or seesaw? Oh! Oh! Bowling!"
Pinkie smiled, bouncing around the room wildly.
"Nope, now we're heading over to MY territory."
Mike spoke, bearing a sneaky grin.
He stepped over to his TV again and pulled out a light gray plastic rectangular box.
"Ooooh! What is that?"
Pinkie bounced over to Mike, staring intently at the unfamiliar device.
"The Nintendo Entertainment System."
Mike proudly chimed in.
"I'm ready!" Pinkie Pie chirped as she took the nun chuck in her mouth again.
"Not quite." Mike said as he took the nun chuck out of her mouth and showed her the controllers.
"This game is a little different."
He continued.
"As I said, this is my turf."
Mike grabbed a gray cartridge from under the TV and showed it to Pinkie.
Pinkie looked at it and read the title.
"Silver surfer?" She looked at Mike.
"Yeah, one of the hardest games in existence."
He blew on the cartridge and shoved it in the NES.
"Now, you can only play this game with one play at a time. I'll just go first, show you how it's done."
Mike bragged as he turned the ancient console on and the classic startup screen of 'Silver Surfer' showed.
"Okie Dokie lokey!"
Pinkie put on her most serious face, inspecting everything that was happening on the screen, which was just Mike scrolling through the selection menu now.
He got ready for the game to start, flexing his thumbs.
"Fuck!" Mike got killed, not even 5 seconds into the game.
"Hold on, just let me get ready. I haven't played this game for a while."
Mike grinned nervously.
"Got it!"
Pinkie Pie responded, moving her stare from the screen for a split second before focusing on it again.
"Oh! Come on! That wasn't even close!"
Mike made several angry gestures towards the screen.
"Did you see that?!”
He looked at Pinkie, who was still inspecting the screen.
"Uhuh! The little silver guy got hit by a small ball."
Pinkie answered as she squinted her eyes are rubber her chin with a hoof.
"Is that bad?"
"Okay, just let me try this a FEW more times." Mike said, staring at the ashamed looking Silver Surfer game over screen.
Pinkie focused back on the screen once more.
"Please Please Please--YES!" Mike exclaimed , still tapping the little red button with all of his might.
"Oh shit, I forgot about th-- SHIT!" Mike put his face in the palm of his hand.
"Hey!"
Pinkie exclaimed, looking from the game over screen to Mike.
"Just like the Silver guy on the screen!"
"Ooh! Can I play next?" Pinkie began to bounce around on the bed.
"Sure, but I doubt you'll do any better." Mike responded, still face-palming
As he handed over the controller.
Pinkie moved the controller in front of her, positioning it right under her head.
She pressed down on the start button, using her muzzle.
"Maybe I didn't tap fast enough, or the D-pad is stuck."
Mike pondered.
He glanced at the screen.
Pinkie must've been at least 20 seconds in the game and she hadn't lost yet.
"Uhm, Pinkie Pie?" Mike asked, still awestruck by Pinkie's video game skills.
"How are you doing that?"
"Doing what?"
The pink pony asked, still mashing the buttons.
"You're awesome at this game, that's what you're doing."
Mike responded.
"I am?" Pinkie looked up again.
"You can stop tapping those buttons now, you already cleared the stage." Mike said, pointing to the screen.
He yawned.
"I'd love to play some more games, but I'm really tired. I need to catch some shuteye."
"I really wish my friends were here now." Pinkie said out of nowhere.
Mike turned his head to the pink pony.
"I'm sure that Twilight is doing her best to somehow find you, she's a smart pony after all."
* * *
"Where am I"?
"Ouch..."
Several cringes came from not too far away
"Hello? Is that you Fl-- Oh no, you're bleeding!" "Don't worry I'll get you somewhere safe!"
* * *
"Can we go outside? I really need some fresh air!" Pinkie Pie prodded Mike with her muzzle.
"You know that I cannot risk you being seen."
Mike responded, rubbing his eyes.
"B-but what if I disguise myself? We could do some groceries! Then we could bake all kinds of stuff!"
Pinkie jumped around in anticipation.
"Alright, if you can disguise yourself in such a way that you won't be recognized as a cartoon pony, then we'll go." Mike teased.
* * *
"I had to open my mouth..."
Mike murmured as he walked down the street with Pinkie.
"Who knew that dressing up as a pig would work?"
Pinkie Pie chirped.
"I'm still confused as to where you got that costume."
Mike retorted.
"Somehow I think this is going to be harder to explain.
A cartoon pony prancing around the streets seems more normal now for some reason."
Mike looked down at Pinkie, who was now prancing around.
"Could you at least TRY to act like a little more... pig-like?"
"Right!" Pinkie responded, shortly after which she began oinking.
Mike and Pinkie Pie slowly closed in on the more busy part of town.
As they walked past the many apartments, a woman walked by with her son, giving Mike a look of disgust.
"Don't look, sweetie. This sick man likes to dress up his dog."
Mike sighed.
"Well, that works too.."
"Ooh! A toy store!"
Pinkie Pie pointed with her hoof to a store located across the street.
"Can we go?"
Mike turned his head in terror. Yes, it was the very toy store Mike got kicked out of when he was looking at the 'My Little Pony' isle.
Multiple worried parents thought that he was watching little girls there.
Ever since that day he had never gotten anywhere close to that store.
"I'd rather not go there."
Mike said, trying to shake the memories off.
"Come on, it'll be fun!"
Pinkie yelled as she galloped across the street.
Mike quickly ran after her, luckily there were barely any cars near.
As soon as Mike had crossed the street Pinkie had disappeared in the toy store.
He slowly stepped inside and looked around.
He spotted a pink, puffy tail somewhere near the girl’s section.
"Great, WHY is it that something bad or awkward has to happen like EVERY five minutes?"
Mike asked himself.
He continued to slowly walk to the girl’s toy section, where he saw Pinkie’s tail.
It was a rather large store, but it wasn’t as crowded as the last time he was here.
The shelves reached up to about the height of Mike’s shoulders, so he didn’t have a hard time looking for a pink pony dressed in a not so convincing pig costume.
As he closed in on the girl's toys department he heard a little girl yell.
"Pinkie Pie! Look mom!"
Mike quickly turned his head from where he heard the girl.
"That's nice, dear. We'll get you 'Pinkie Pie' for your birthday."
Mike saw the girl and her mom walk away from the shelves filled with My Little Pony figurines.
"Fuck, she must have been talking about the toys."
He continued to look around the isle.
"Where the hell i--"
"--Boo!"
Mike jumped up and quickly turned around to see Pinkie Pie walk around the shelves.
She had a content grin on her face.
"Where were you? Don't run off like that again."
Pinkie sat on her haunches and began to pout.
“Damn it, I’m beginning to sound like my mother.”
"Okay, sorry. I might be a little too protective of you, but I just can't take any risks."
Mike sighed.
"Oh, don't worry! I was just looking around!”
Pinkie perked up.
"Did you see anything you'd like?" Mike smirked; the sudden joyous behavior of the pink pony made him feel a little happier as well.
"Ooh! I can have a toy?"
Pinkie said with almost child-like enthusiasm.
"Sure, I don't see why not. So did you find anythi--" Before Mike could finish his sentence Pinkie pulled out a box containing two large green hands, out of nowhere.
Mike read the front of the box.
"Hulk Hands? Really?"
He said with a somewhat confused look on his face.
"Oh, they're not for me!"
Pinkie giggled.
"Then for who?" Mike continued to ask.
"Lyra!"
Mike looked at Pinkie in disbelief.
"Her birthday is in a few days, and she kept talking about 'hands', and then I saw this box! And the word 'hands' and then I thought: "Wow! This is perfect for Lyra!".
Mike quickly shook his head as he processed Pinkie's fast paced chatter.
"Let's pay for these then."
He signaled Pinkie Pie to follow along.
As they walked over to the cash register, the cashier looked at them funny.
"Sir, we do not allow animals in this store, read the signs?"
The cashier looked like one of those typical world-weary women in their early 50’s; red, unkempt hair, puffy face, and a raspy voice, indicating that she was a regular smoker.
She pointed a finger at the huge sign on the window: "No animals allowed."
"Oh, sorry, she just ran in here. It won't happen again."
Mike smiled uncomfortably.
"It's a little too late for that now, and you caught me on a bad day." The cashier frowned and grabbed a small radio from behind her.
"Security to line 5, we've got a trouble-maker here."
"B-but, I said I was sorry and--"
Mike got interrupted by a high pitched voice.
"--Hey, it's not his fault! I was t--"
Pinkie began to yell, but quickly got muted by Mike, who held his hand in front of the pink pony's muzzle.
"This is not the best time."
Mike spoke through gritted teeth.
"A funny guy, eh?" A low voice barked from behind him.
"Uhh.. Yeah, I'm a...ventriloquist!"
Mike replied, trying to sound as convincing as possible.
He turned around, a tall, but skinny guy with a face full of pimples and a slightly smaller, built man approached him.
"Heh.. I'll just go now.."
Mike backed up, pushing Pinkie Pie along with him.
"That'd be wise."
The pimple faced guy said with voice crack.
* * *
"Is everyone here like that?" Pinkie asked Mike as they exited the store.
"Not everyone, but a lot of people are."
Mike sighed.
Pinkie gave Mike compassionate look.
"Don't put too much thought into it. Some people are just like that."
Pinkie stared at the ground as they walked further into the city.
Mike looked at the pink pony; he felt bad. This world just isn't meant to house her, too much anger, not enough love and tolerance.
"So.."
Mike began to talk, trying to cheer up Pinkie Pie.
"What's your favorite kind of pastry?"
Pinkie immediately perked up her head.
"Hmm... Cupcakes, no doubt!"
Pinkie Pie chirped as she began to smile again.
Mike continued.
"Yeah, those are great. And after that?"
Mike and Pinkie continued their conversation about food and pretty much every other subject relevant to Pinkie's interests.
* * *
"...But really, I'd choose cherry-changas over peanut brittle any day!"
Pinkie chortled.
"I don't know, peanut brittle IS pretty good."
Mike interjected Pinkie Pie.
"Have you ever tasted cherry-changas? I'm sure you'll think differently after tasting one!"
Pinkie replied to Mike, giving him an unsure look.
"I just don't think that a tortilla wrap with cherries could taste good."
Mike explained.
Pinkie began to frown.
"How can you judge without ever tasting it?"
She asked a bit more serious.
"Because I think so"
Mike replied as he got a little agitated.
"But you never tasted it!"
Pinkie upped the volume of her voice.
"And I don't want to! My point stands, we're nearly at the supermarket anyway."
Mike ended the discussion.
"I'm not done with you."
Pinkie muttered as she looked at Mike with squinted eyes and pointed a hoof at him.
"Okay, this store doesn't allow animals either, and I don't think that leaving you out here is the best idea." Pinkie looked at Mike.
"Then how are we going to get the groceries?"
The pink pony asked.
"Hmm..." Mike looked up in the sky, thinking of ideas.
* * *
"You think this will work?"
Pinkie Pie asked Mike.
“I’m not sure at all.”
Mike walked into the store, pushing a shopping cart.
Pinkie was lying in the cart with Mike’s coat covering her.
“Let’s just try to get this stuff as fast as possible so we can go home.”
Mike gulped as he continued to push the cart through the supermarket.
“Okie dokie lokey.”
Pinkie Pie replied.
They arrived at the confectionery isle.
"Okay, we're here. So what do you need?"
Pinkie lifted up a coat so she had a better view at the shelves containing various packages of cake mix and frosting.
"Hmm.. that bag of flour! Oh and the sugar! Ooh! Powdered vanilla!"
Pinkie chirped.
"I don't see any butter here, and we also need eggs!" Pinkie sat up and pointed towards the dairy isle.
"Make haste!" She laughed as she quickly hid under the coat again.
* * *
Mike walked back home with the cart containing Pinkie Pie and the groceries.
They closed in on Mike’s residence.
Pinkie Pie hopped out of the cart and began to walk alongside Mike.
“So, have you ever baked before?”
She asked.
“Does cooking an egg count?”
Mike asked sheepishly.
He looked over at the driveway; there was another bike parked there.
Mike shrugged it off; probably just the bike from the neighbor, it wouldn’t have been the first time that happened.
He got the keys out of his pocket and opened the front door.
“Mike, bro! I wondered where you were!”
Kevin greeted a dumbstruck Mike.
“I made some special brownies, took the liberty of eating one myself first.”
“H-hey Kevin. Aren’t you supposed to be at work?”
Mike asked confused.
“What, aren’t you happy that I came over? I thought you might need help with whatever you said you were gonna do, so I asked Mr. Thompson if I could get the day off.”
Kevin continued.
“So what did you buy there?”
He glanced over Mike’s shoulder.
Mike quickly blocked his view by leaning to his left.
“Just… groceries.”
“Okay, cool. So what did y—“
Kevin stopped in mid-sentence as he noticed a fluffy pink tail.
“Dude, I think the brownies are kicking in. I’m seeing ponies man!”
Pinkie Pie walked in.
“Hi! Are you one of Mike’s friends?”
She asked joyfully.
“Man, I’m tripping balls. Mike take some of these brownies, I think I outdid myself this time.”
Kevin continued.
Mike was unsure of what exactly was going on in Kevin’s mind, but he decided to just go with it.
“Why is he acting so weird?”
Pinkie asked as Kevin began to continuously poke her.
Mike squatted down next to the pink pony.
“He thinks he’s hallucinating.”
He whispered.
“Why does he think that?”
Pinkie continued to ask.
“He had ‘special’ brownies.”
“Ooh! What’s so special about those brownies?”
Pinkie looked at Kevin, who was still poking her.
“Mike, she’s talking to me. I’m kind of getting freaked out, she even FEELS real.”
Kevin stopped poking the pink pony and looked at Mike.
“I guess you should go home and wear off that bad trip.”
Mike insisted.
“You think so?”
Kevin asked as he began scratching Pinkie behind her ears.
Pinkie Pie apparently enjoyed this and pushed up against Kevin’s hand.
“It’s for the best.”
Mike continued, getting weirded out by this situation.
“Alright then.”
Kevin got up and walked out of the door.
“I guess I’ll talk to you later.”
“Bye.”
Mike closed the door and sighed in relief.
“He was nice!”
Pinkie exclaimed as she got back up again.
Mike turned around to face the pink pony.
“Yeah, well that’s what wee—Oh no, Pinkie what are you eating?”
“Your friend left some of his brownies! And they really taste special too!”
Pinkie said happily, with her mouth full.
Mike looked at Pinkie in shock.
"There was something weird in those brownies, wasn't there?" Pinkie asked with a serious voice.
* * *
“Got it! Say Dash, why do they call it a hack saw? It doesn’t hack; hacking is what I was doing with the knife. This is a saw. I don’t get it.”
Pinkie saw herself in third person perspective slicing through Dash's mangled flesh.
"Shoo be doo! Shoop shoop de doop!" Pinkie turned around as a horde of sea ponies appeared out of nowhere.
"Call upon the sea ponies. when you're in distress!"
"Pinkie Pie?"
"Helpful as can be ponies, simply signal S.O.S.!"
"Can you hear me?"
"If you find you're past the drift and--"
"--Pinkie!"
Pinkie Pie slowly awoke.
She was lying in the bathtub.
"Where am I?"
She slowly said.
"What happened?"
"Well, first I was showing you Equestria Daily, and then 3 minutes later you began to freak out and begged me to read you 'Cupcakes'."
Mike continued.
"Then you began to frantically flail your hoofs around and knocked me unconscious."
Pinkie looked at Mike in disbelief.
"And when I woke up again I heard you screaming about sea ponies, so I rushed upstairs, and then I found you sleeping in the tub."
“How long was I doing this?”
Pinkie Pie replied, still feeling dizzy.
“About Four hours, including the time I was knocked out.”
Mike responded.
“And my parents are visiting my neighbors, so if you want to do anything we’ve still got plenty of time.”
He massaged his temples with his thumbs.
“Although I think I should take some aspirin first.”
“We should bake cupcakes!”
Pinkie suddenly said, apparently recovered from her trip.
“Or that.”
Mike snickered.
The doorbell rang.
“Stay here.”
Mike said to Pinkie as he walked out of the bathroom and downstairs.
A faint purple glow shone through the window next to the door.
Mike doubtfully opened the door.
A purple unicorn carrying a wounded, butter-yellow Pegasus on her back was standing in front of the doorway with a desperate look in her eyes.
“My friend is wounded, badly! Can we please come in?”
Chapter 6
“Yes, I’m sure I saw them heading this way, now hold on tight!”
“That’s easier said than done, you know?”
* * *
Mike led the purple unicorn to the living room; she was still carrying the yellow Pegasus.
“Thanks again, I’m not sure what would’ve happened if I didn’t get Fluttershy some place warm.”
The unicorn said as she struggled to keep her balance. She must have been carrying the Pegasus for a while now.
Pinkie’s curiosity had gotten the better of her and she was now downstairs, agape at Fluttershy’s condition.
"W-what happened to h-her?"
The pink pony asked with a trembling voice as she slowly walked over to her friends.
Twilights ears perked up at the familiar voice.
"Pinkie Pie?"
Twilight quickly turned around.
"Twilight!"
Twilight Sparkles eyes lit up.
A few seconds of silence occurred as the two ponies embraced each other.
Only to be broken by Mike.
"Not trying to interrupt two good friends re-uniting, but what brought you to THIS exact house? I mean, no offense, but it seems like an awfully big coincidence."
He inquired.
"Oh, I’m sorry." The purple unicorn broke the hug and turned around to face Mike.
"My name is Twili--" "Mike, this is Twilight Sparkle, One of my bestest friends! But ofcourse you already knew that!"
Pinkie Pie began bouncing around again, seemingly forgotten about Fluttershy's condition.
"And the pony on the couch is Fluttershy! She is also one of my be.." Pinkie trailed off as she laid her eyes on Fluttershy.
It wasn't a pretty sight; her left wing was disjointed and had a couple of broken feathers, deep cuts covered most of her back, a large strip of skin was missing from her cutie mark and a stick had pierced through the skin on her hind leg.
The rest of her body was bruised and had several smaller cuts.
"I found her like that when I woke up; she was laying at the edge of a forest only a few hoofs away from me."
Twilight said as she too fixated her look on the butter-yellow pegasus."
Pinkie Pie slowly walked over to Fluttershy who was on the couch, resting on her side and breathing heavily.
She gently nudged the Pegasus' chest with her muzzle.
"Come on Fluttershy, get up... Just a few scratches..."
Pinkie started sniffling softly.
Twilight Sparkle walked over to Pinkie and laid her hoof over her.
"Don't worry Pinkie, she'll be fine, I'm sure."
The Purple unicorn said, trying to seem as optimistic as possible.
She was however unsure of what she just assured her friend was true.
Pinkie Pie seemed to feel better; she nuzzled Fluttershy and looked at Twilight Sparkle.
"Come on."
Pinkie sniffled one last time before rubbing her watery eyes dry.
"I gotta show you something!" She continued in her usual cheery mood.
Pinkie Pie walked out of the room and signaled Twilight to follow her.
"Yeah, sure, don't mind me. I only helped you in and all.."
Mike said as he turned his head around to look at the wounded, butter-yellow Pegasus on the couch.
His breathing stocked for a second as he noticed the bad condition she was in; he hadn't really gotten a good look at her until now.
Fluttershy seemed to be in shock, she was shivering and her coat looked a lot paler than in the show.
Her eyes were closed and her breathing was erratic.
Mike stepped over to Fluttershy and knelt down in front of her.
He closely examined her wounds; they looked dirty.
Mike got up and walked to the cupboard to get some gauze and beta dine.
* * *
"What exactly am I looking at, Pinkie?"
Twilight said with a puzzled look on her face as she stared at the various Playboys Pinkie had lain out in front of her.
Pinkie Pie merely shrugged in response.
"Mike only said that they were 'bad magazines'."
The pink pony got her face closer to the explicit magazine and inspected it with squinted eyes.
"Maybe it holds some strange magic powers!" Pinkie's eyes widened. "Maybe THAT'S why I keep looking at it!"
Twilight Sparkle gave Pinkie Pie a sarcastic look. "Well, I doubt THAT."
"I don't know, Twi. Remember when I told you about my Pinkie sense? You doubted that too, but who was right in the end?"
Pinkie sat down on her haunches.
Twilight sighed, her horn began to glow and she used her magic to turn the first page.
"Hmm... Index on the first page, seems about normal so far."
She continued looking over the page before turning it to the next.
"I'm not sure what this is though."
Twilight remarked as she floated up the magazine, turning it around and around, trying to make something out of it.
"Maybe this is some nature magazine, displaying the anatomy of... whatever Mike is."
"Human!" Pinkie interjected.
"But they are in such odd positions, unlike any nature magazine I've ever seen."
Twilight Sparkle continued.
"Oh! You should see the middle of the page! It has a big poster thingy!"
Pinkie put in.
"You mean the centerfold?" Twilight Sparkle corrected.
Pinkie simply nodded in response.
* * *
Mike carefully cleaned the large gash that ran along Fluttershy's back before applying some beta dine and gauze.
"She has remained awfully quiet."
He began to worry.
"Fluttershy, can you hear me?"
The only response Mike got was some cringes of pain and discomfort.
* * *
"And just look at how limber she is!"
Pinkie exclaimed.
"I should take notes, this is all pretty interesting."
Twilight Sparkle mumbled.
She began to write down some sentences on a blank piece of paper, lying around in Mike's room.
"Whoa!"
Pinkie suddenly yelled.
"What, something wrong?" Twilight inquired.
"Ear flop, knee twitch, eye flutter! And a twitchy tail!"
Pinkie continued with wide eyes.
"W-what does that mean?"
Twilight asked as she nervously walked around, looking up to the ceiling as if she was expecting something to crash through it.
"I'm not sure, must be something big!"
Pinkie Pie responded. She too was walking around nervously.
* * *
"...And that's how I flunked histo--"
*--CRASH*
"What the..."
Mike whispered as he looked at the curtain covered window.
He slowly opened the curtains to reveal a large crack in the window and two figures lying on the ground.
It was pretty dark outside, so he couldn't really see them well. Although one of them appeared to have wings and rainbow colored hair.
"You've gotta be.."
Mike didn't think twice and quickly walked over to the front door.
Upon opening it he peeked around the door opening.
He didn't see anything, or anypony for that matter.
"Hello?"
Mike yelled with a sense of discomfort.
"I'm not gonna--"
A blue flash shot at Mike, tackled him, and nailed him to the ground.
Mike gasped for air.
"What did you do to my friends?!'
Shouted the blue Pegasus that held Mike to the ground.
Mike pushed the rainbow maned Pegasus off of him and continued to gasp for air.
He got up.
"Why do I constantly get this shit?! I'm only trying to help!"
He held on to his stomach; that is where Rainbow Dash impacted with him.
Rainbow Dash looked up at Mike.
"So you didn’t hurt them?"
Rarity walked around the corner of the house, looking disoriented and disheveled.
Apparently she softened the impact with the window for Rainbow Dash.
"Oh, there you are Rarity."
Pinkie Pie and Twilight Sparkle came walking out of the door-opening, each of them carrying a multitude of Playboy magazines in their mouths, which they immediately dropped upon seeing their friends.
"Girls! I'm so glad to see you here!"
Twilight exclaimed.
"Look at what I have here, you'll love this!"
Pinkie Pie yelled out over Twilight at the same time.
"I told you, Rarity.
I told you I saw them heading here! “
Rainbow Dash taunted Rarity.
"And I suppose you also knew you were going to smash us into a window?"
Rarity retorted.
"Well, I was trying to awesomely dodge the window at the last second, but your weight wouldn't let me."
Rainbow Dash replied.
Rarity gave her an offended look.
"Are you saying I'm fat?"
"--Girls!"
Twilight interjected to avoid further arguments.
“Sorry.”
Rainbow Dash muttered
“What happened to Mike.”
Pinkie asked, looking at Mike who was leaning against the wall, trying to catch his breath.
“Mike?”
Rarity and Rainbow Dash asked in unison.
Pinkie pointed at Mike.
“She tackled me… in my stomach!”
Mike said in between breaths, giving an angry look at Rainbow Dash.
The rainbow maned pony took a step forward.
“You’re lucky I didn’t go for your--!”
“--*cough*”
Twilight interrupted Dash.
“What, I was gonna say ‘chest’!”
Rainbow Dash put in.
The purple unicorn rolled her eyes.
“Anyway, how did you two find us?”
"Easy, I cleared some clouds and could see everything that happened on the ground."
Rainbow Dash patted herself on the chest.
"Besides, everything here looks so dull and gray; it's hard to not notice you."
"Then why did it take you so long to find them?"
Rarity snarled, obviously still upset about the impact with the window.
"I knew where they were the whole time, I just needed to make myself look even cooler... Totally nailed it."
The cyan Pegasus replied with a smug look on her face.
Pinkie Pie giggled, whereas Rarity groaned at this.
"Wait, where is Applejack?" Twilight inquired as she tried to look behind Rarity.
* * * One day earlier * * *
"Oof! What in Tarnation?"
Applejack looked around at where she fell from mid-air.
"Where am ah?"
She found herself to be in a barn.
"Big Mac?" She nervously asked.
"Apple bloom? Granny Smith? Anypony?"
Applejack hopped off the giant hay bale she fell on and approached the barn door.
"Everythin' looks so much.. bigger."
She remarked as she continued to look around.
Applejack bucked open the large door.
As she stepped outside her eyes had to adjust to the light a little.
"Yup, it's a farm alright. But why does everythin' look so.. Grey?"
She shook her head.
"Ah'm probably just a lil' woozy from the fall."
The farm pony took a deep breath, only to break out into coughs seconds later.
"What's that awful smell?"
She disregarded it when she suddenly heard the neighing of horses.
"Ah hope somepony can tell me what's goin' on here, or where ah am!"
Applejack mumbled as she followed the neighing.
Soon enough she found where the sounds came from.
"What the hay?!"
She exclaimed at the sight of the horses she saw in front of her, kept behind a fence.
They didn't look anything like the horses from Equestria, let alone ponies.
"Hello?"
Applejack greeted the horses, expecting some sort of response.
Nothing.
"What's goin' on here?"
She hung her head.
"Ah don't think ah'm in Equestria no more."
* * *
"Well, this is the staircase that leads to the first floor. That's where my parents' bedroom and my bedroom are located."
Mike said as he opened the front door.
He said he'd just show the ponies around the house a little so they wouldn't get up all in his stuff, Like Pinkie Pie did with his Playboy stash.
As Rarity had regained her posture and was feeling a little less dizzy, she noticed Mike's attire as she said it and became instantly fascinated with human fashion.
"This is the hall, and the toilet is over there..."
Mike pointed to a door left to him.
"...And this is the scullery, don't open it, there is a dog inside there that seems to not like ponies."
Mike said a bit comically.
Twilight eyed him with a puzzled look.
"Ask Pinkie."
He returned.
Rarity looked around, amazed at all of the human designs and the subtle differences between Equestria's and this world's.
She couldn't stop thinking about all of the beautiful and unique styles of clothing she could make when she returned to Ponyville.
She barely heard what Mike was saying as her attention drifted to a neatly folded dress that was laid down on the stairs.
"Hmmm... I wonder if there are any more of these upstairs...”
Rarity thought as she turned her head to the upper floor.
“I’m sure that he won’t mind me getting a little look.”
When Mike turned his back to continue his brief tour Rarity slowed down until the group left her, nopony noticing, and she darted upstairs.
"Here is the kitchen..." Mike pointed to his right and opened the door.
Rainbow Dash was growing bored of all this.
"Just some boring guy talking about his boring house."
She said to herself and she continued to follow the group.
She looked at Twilight and Pinkie who didn't seem to mind the tour.
Rainbow Dash then noticed the magazines both Pinkie Pie and Twilight Sparkle were carrying.
"Anything beats listening to this guy..."
She tapped Pinkie's shoulder.
"Hey Pinkie, what do you have there?"
"Oh thesf really coowl magazines!"
Pinkie's voice was a bit muffled from the magazine in her mouth.
"Cool, huh? Mind if I take a look?"
Rainbow Dash continued.
"Sure Dashie!”
Pinkie responded, dropping the magazines on the floor.
* * *
Rarity trotted over the landing, looking through every room.
She peeked into one door opening and noticed it was the bathroom.
"Not what I wanted... but that design is good."
Rarity said, using her magic to pick up a towel with a very intricate and colorful looking design on it.
She continued to trot down the hall, looking in the different rooms for items she might be able to use to make different designs with.
She looked in Mike's room.
"Why this place is just a disgusting mess!"
She exclaimed.
As Rarity prepared to leave Mike's room she noticed a bag with the My Little Pony logo stitched on it. "This on the other hand..." she said, "This could work."
She grabbed the bag and put all of her collected items into the bag.
Rarity made her way to the final room upstairs, she sighed "They have to be in here... unless they are all downstairs. Oh I should have followed Mike."
She opened the door and squealed in delight, she found an open wardrobe filled with dresses, each one just as beautiful as the one she'd found on the staircase yet each one with a different design than the rest.
She ran to the wardrobe and began to pull dresses out.
Mike heard the squeal and turned around worried.
He saw Twilight following him and down the hall Pinkie looking at Rainbow Dash, whose wings were spread wide as she looked through a magazine.
The squeal pulled Rainbow Dash out of the trance and noticing her wings open and wide she quickly pulled them down to her sides, her blue face turning a deep red.
Mike and the other three ponies quickly ran upstairs trying to find the source of the noise,
Mike ran into his parents’ room and the other ponies followed.
There he saw Rarity deep inside his mother's wardrobe, her many dresses filling up his My Little Pony bag.
"Whoa! Rarity! That's my mom's stuff!"
Mike yelled out, shocked at the mess of clothes that was occupying his parents’ room.
Rarity didn't even hear him; she was caught up in the moment tearing the dresses out of the wardrobe.
Pinkie Pie suddenly busted out of the wardrobe.
"Hey Rarity! What are you doing?"
She asked with a bright smile.
This sudden appearance made the fashion pony jump back in surprise.
"Oh Pinkie it’s just you, I'm taking these dresses. Do you see these designs? They are absolutely beautiful! Just imagine what I could do with them back in Equestria!"
Mike approached Rarity.
"That's my mom's stuff, and she's going to be pissed when she sees this mess, let alone a couple of dresses missing from her collection!"
Rarity laughed
"Oh please Mike, she has so many beautiful dresses she won't notice if a few were to... mysteriously disappear. And you wouldn't tell her I did it would you?"
Rarity gave him a duck face.
"Of course I wouldn't tell her it was you!"
Mike said.
"Oh I knew you wouldn't!"
Rarity exclaimed.
"That would probably get me in the insane asylum or several appointments with a shrink!"
Mike responded with panic.
"Why would you be locked up in such a horrid place for that? You're not the one who stole something."
Rarity asked, not understanding yet that Technicolor equines weren't normal or existent in this world.
"Ask Pinkie or Twilight to explain, after you put the dresses NEATLY back in the wardrobe."
Mike felt like he was an overworked father teaching his kids manners.
Rarity sighed sadly "Please please please please please, may I have one of your dresses?"
She asked Mike, giving him the cutest duck face she could.
Mike however was unfazed by this, just like he was unfazed and disgusted by the many duck faces he encountered on Facebook.
"No."
He said coldly.
Rarity now tried a different more seductive approach.
She looked at him
"Oh please let me have at least one of the dresses, I'll make it up to you some way."
She said.
"I don't even want to KNOW what you mean by that. Just put them back and I'll take it into consideration. I really need to check on Fluttershy."
Mike responded, getting more agitated by the second.
"Fluttershy? What’s wrong with Fluttershy?"
Rarity asked, the dresses completely out of her mind now.
Rainbow Dash's ears perked up.
"Follow me girls."
Twilight Sparkle said with a somber tone
Rarity quickly ran behind Twilight ready to check on her best friend.
As they finally arrived at the living room, Rainbow Dash and Rarity both looked in shock as they saw their friend in such a bad condition.
"Oh, don't worry girls! Twilight said she's gonna be just fine!"
Pinkie Pie assured her friends, looking at Twilight Sparkle.
"Not if she doesn't get medical help soon."
Twilight confessed, looking at the floor.
"Then what are you waiting for?"
Rarity asked, as she turned to Mike.
"Get her to a hospital!"
She continued intimidating.
"Look, I know that this is a very stressful situation, but I'm not even sure if the veterinarian is still open."
Mike said, feeling a little uncomfortable under the pressure.
"VETERINARIAN? SHE ISN'T JUST SOME ANIMAL! NOW WE'LL TAKE HER TO THE DOCTER AND THEY HAD BETTER BE THERE!" Rarity yelled at Mike.
He winced a little at this sudden outburst.
Twilight jumped to Mike's defense.
"Listen Rarity, In this world Doctors don’t treat ponies, but humans. Animals go to the veterinarian."
"What?!"
Rarity exclaimed, "Don't they realize that we're just as "human" as they are?"
She was getting somewhat disgusted at how much different ponies were treated.
"I can try to get her to a veterinarian; I'll just have to use my parents' car."
Mike said, still a little stressed.
This cause Rarity to only get angrier.
"TRY?! Oh you will do more than try!"
Pinkie pulled a ring of keys out of nowhere and held them up in front of Mike.
"How did you... Never mind."
Mike responded, as he got the keys from Pinkie's mouth and walked over to the living room.
Rarity moved over to Fluttershy, trying to comfort her friend. "Fluttershy, it’s me Rarity.
I'll make sure that you get the best care possible. You'll be okay."
"Who will move Fluttershy?"
Mike asked, as he peeked inside the living room.
"Rainbow Dash is the strongest; I believe she should do it."
Rarity said.
Rainbow Dash beamed.
"Then again, she did smash me into a window earlier."
Rarity continued.
"Twilight, I'm sure you're capable of carrying poor Fluttershy?"
With a bit of effort Twilight Sparkle lifted up Fluttershy with her magic, and floated her over to the doorway.
Rainbow Dash was taken aback by all this.
Her best friend since flight school, hurt badly and in shock.
She watched helplessly as Twilight Continued to move Fluttershy to the door.
Twilight Sparkle wasn't feeling much better about it herself.
Mike opened the front door and walked to his parents' car, opened the passenger doors and shoved some of seats back.
This big ugly car finally felt useful.
Pinkie hopped outside and followed Mike.
Pinkie Pie was then followed By Rarity, Twilight Sparkle and Fluttershy, and Rainbow Dash.
Mike opened the door to the driver's side and the front-passenger seat.
"Shotgun!"
Pinkie Pie yelled as she took seat next to where Mike was about to sit.
The rest of the ponies waited outside the car as Twilight laid Fluttershy down in the back and strapped her in firmly with a seatbelt after Mike pointed out that it’s safer that way.
The rest of the ponies then went in the car with Rarity and Rainbow Dash sitting next to Fluttershy to make sure she was alright, and Twilight closer to Mike and Pinkie, asking them questions about this strange new world.
"What the hell am I doing here? I don't even HAVE my driver’s license yet!"
Mike said.
"I can't do this."
Rarity's horn glowed a deep bright blue and she moved it closer to Mike's head.
"If you don't get her to the hospital this instant, I swear to Celestia I will do things to you that will haunt you for the rest of your life!"
Rarity growled.
"You're the boss!"
Mike squeaked out, feeling genuinely scared.
Twilight Sparkle, Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash looked at their friend, shocked of this uncharacteristic behavior she was showing.
Fluttershy cringed and made sounds of discomfort.
"Drive."
Rarity said.
Foreword
Sorry about my hiatus, it was a dick move.
Also the huge chapter I promised is divided up into multiple sections, already written.
They just need some editing, but will be done within the following week, hopefully.
Anyway, I hope you enjoy this small chapter!
* * *
Chapter 7
A uncomfortable silence filled the car as Mike and the ponies were getting halfway to the veterinarian.
Rarity decided to disrupt the silence.
"I'm.. I'm terribly sorry about earlier. It was rather unbecoming of me."
She said in an honest tone.
"That's okay I guess."
Mike responded; he felt tired.
A thousand thoughts were running through Mike's head.
"Are my parents going to disown me when they find out I took the car away?" "What reasons am I going to give them for taking the car away?" "Are the police checking this road?" "Why did I let a marshmallow pony force me to take my parents' car in the first place?"
Rainbow Dash couldn't handle awkward silences.
"Don’t you have a gramophone lying around here?"
She looked towards Mike.
"I could use some music now, I think we all could."
Mike’s head bobbed up.
“Alright, I guess that should break the tension.”
He turned on the car radio’s CD player.
As the infamous intro to ‘Rock you like a hurricane’ played, the ponies all jumped up.
After having recovered from the initial shock Rarity complained as to how ‘uncouth’ it was to play such ‘rubbish’ music without warning her first.
Twilight however questioned where it was coming from and tried to combine both magic and science to explain it.
Pinkie Pie began to sing along, interpreting the song in her own way and Rainbow Dash began to bang her head to the music.
Fluttershy cringed from the fright and ever increasing pain, which made everypony quiet down again.
Rainbow Dash glanced over to Fluttershy.
“Uhm.. How about classical music?”
Uttering ‘classical’ as if it was the worst word imaginable.
“Sure, I guess.”
Mike responded sheepishly as he tuned over to the classical music station.
As the narrator faded out on the radio station it slowly faded into ‘In the hall of mountain king’ Rarity tried to soothe Fluttershy, Twilight enjoyed the calm music as well.
Rainbow dash stepped over closer to Mike.
"Can't you play something else, please? This is a little too much."
She whispered, not trying to get Rarity's attention.
"Your marshmallow friend has creepy unicorn powers, I have no idea what she's capable of, besides what I've seen in the show."
Mike whispered back.
"So I'd rather not change the station."
"Besides, it seems to be helping calm Fluttershy, she's not squirming in pain as much, so I think it would be best to leave it how it is."
Rainbow Dash looked at Fluttershy, who was squirming less and sighed.
"Alright fine...can you at least go faster so I don't have to listen to this stuff as long... and to get Fluttershy help sooner of course."
"But I'm going at the speed limit already! If I go any faster and we run into any cops, it'll just take longer to get her there."
Rainbow Dash grumbled.
"That's so stupid! They don't let you go fast? What about people who want to be speed demons like me, or people in emergencies!"
"Well... if the emergency is bad enough then you go into an ambulance and they take you to the hospital...they can go as fast as they want and you could go out in the country if you wanted to go fast, I suppose... or become a racer."
"Well why didn't you get an ambulance for Fluttershy then? This is a really bad emergency, isn't it?" Rainbow Dash was giving Mike a dirty look, which made him uncomfortable.
"Ahah....well...to me, you, and the other's it's an emergency...but I'd be called crazy, or asked if I'm on drugs if I said there is a Technicolor cartoon pony in my home hurt and bleeding."
"Well why is that? We're right here aren't we? It's not that crazy."
Rainbow Dash started to argue, wanting to go faster already to stop the boring music.
"Believe me, just because you're here doesn't make it crazy. Can you imagine what it would be like if I just popped into Equestria?"
"That's impossible though!” Rainbow Dash retorted “A human has never appeared in Equestria before!" Her voice grew unknowingly louder.
"Well before the five of you showed up, a cartoon pony, from Equestria or otherwise, had never appeared on Earth.” Mike said. “Then you appeared, that means it wasn't impossible...even if it was thought to have been." He finished.
Rainbow Dash sighed, realizing she'd lost the argument and covered her ears trying to block out the music, if she could even call it that.
A few minutes later, she was squirming in her seat due to boredom and pent up energy.
She turned back over to Mike and asked: "So you'll only get in trouble if you speed and are caught by a "cop" right?"
Mike eyed her cautiously.
"Well...yes, but it's a risk I'd rather not take."
Rainbow Dash looked around before turning back to him.
"Well, you said speed demons can use old country roads to go really fast, right?"
"Yes... I did, what are you getting at Rainbow?" Mike retorted, slightly annoyed.
"We're on one right now! Come on, we can speed. I can even fly above the car and tell you if I see these "cop" people!"
Mike sighed, thinking it through.
"Well... alright, I guess you have a point. And it will get me to the vet sooner... but do you even-"
Rainbow Dash had already flown out of the car window, high above Mike's car.
"- know what a police car looks like..."
Mike finished as he lowered his head in annoyance.
"Where did Rainbow Dash go?"
Twilight asked as she cyan Pegasus flew out the window.
Mike continued, trying not to speed up TOO much.
As 'In hall of mountain king' became more and more frantic, Fluttershy cringed and squeaked.
"Pinkie, can you change the station?"
Pinkie Pie stopped humming along with the song and reached for the tuning wheel.
"Okie dokie lokie!"
"-Smooth jazz station, where we play jazz tw-"
"Nah."
Pinkie tuned further
"-Stand up, get up for your rights"
Mike continued going fast, and stayed that way for a few minutes until he heard sirens behind him and cursed under his breath.
He rolled his window down and yelled for Rainbow Dash to hide somewhere or stay out of sight.
“I didn’t really know what a police car looked like...”
Rainbow Dash laughed nervously,
"... but I'll know for next time... right?"
Mike sighed, "I guess so, Now hide, please." Mike slowed, eventually pulling to a stop on the side of the road while Rainbow Dash hovered high in the air, near some treetops.
Twilight and Rarity put a large blanket over everypony, hiding them from the cop.
Mike nervously tapped his steering wheel, looking straight ahead.
After a couple of seconds he saw a tall figure exit the police car and walking towards him from his rear view mirror.
The cop peeked through the open window, her face obscured by her cap and the overall darkness.
A sleek, female voice began to speak.
"Going a little fast there, boy."
“Oh, I didn't really notice?" Mike replied.
"I'd like to see your license and registration, please."
The female police officer was wearing sunglasses, for whatever reason.
She held out her hand, waiting for Mike to hand her the papers, which he didn't have.
Then she saw that the blanket in the back seat was moving.
"What's under the blanket?"
She asked, sounding a little more aggressive.
Mike's eye involuntarily twitched.
"Just a bunch of pillows."
He responded, trying to sound convincing.
"I'm just gonna take a little look, sir. You just stay put. Hand those keys over to me; I don't want any funny business going on."
Mike took the keys out of the ignition and handed them over.
"What did I just do?!"
He worried.
He heard the cop open up the door, but he didn't dare turning his head.
Suddenly he heard a rather loud bash, followed by a groan and thud.
"What was that?!"
Mike wondered.
He stayed there not looking behind him.
"Look officer, I can explain, those are just plushies of-" he was cut off by a relieving familiar sound, the sound of a sweet Southern voice. "What arya talkin' bout pardner? I just saw you were havin' some trouble n' though I'd help."
He turned around to see Applejack standing there, the officer on the ground, starting to get up with two muddy hoof prints on her uniform where Applejack must've bucked her from behind.
Applejack saw her trying to regain her posture and delivered a kick to the head, knocking the officer unconscious.
"Thanks, I guess. So no trust issues then?"
Mike asked.
"Well, ya see pardner, ma friend Rainbow Dash said yer helpin her n' the other's."
She lifted the blanket with her teeth and saw Fluttershy and the other ponies.
"Well, I suppose Rainbow did exaggerate a lil', but she really needs some help now.” Applejack removed the entire blanket. “Good to see ya, girls, ah was worried about ya’ll."
Rainbow Dash flew down to the rest of them
"Looks like I saved all of you,"
She grinned cockily.
"All in a day's work I suppose."
Mike sighed.
"You? I think it was all Applejack."
He smirked at her and Rainbow immediately went on the defensive.
"Well yeah but... she wouldn't have a clue where to find you if it weren't for me!"
Mike laughed at the pony's argument.
"Thanks Applejack..."
Rainbow Dash glared at Mike
"...and Rainbow."
Applejack nodded while Rainbow went back to grinning cockily.
Mike stared down at the officer.
"Is she still breathing?"
He asked in a concerned tone.
"I only gave her a light ‘tap’ to the noggin' she should be fine…"
Applejack responded, and glanced at the downed cop.
"... Ah hope..."
Mike stared at the police car and noticed a small camera on the dashboard in it.
"Well, crap"
Twilight butted in.
"I hate to be rude and all, but did you three forget about Fluttershy?"
Mike grabbed the key to the car from the unconscious officer and jumped into the front seat.
"Right! Applejack, you get in the car. Rainbow Dash you go back to scouting."
Applejack hopped in the car and shut the door while Rainbow Dash flew high above them.
He sped up again and continued his way to the veterinarian.
"Beside the potential murder, and recorded video footage of a cartoon pony doing just THAT, everything is going to plan, sort of."
A smile is all it takes
Chapter 1
“I call ‘em combo’s!”
“What was that?” A low voice called from another room.
“Nothing, dad.” Mike, a closet brony, 18 years of age responded nervously as he turned the volume of the video down.
“Just keep it down.” The voice called again.
“Will do.”
Mike sighed. “Phew, close one.”
Mike had this problem all too often, sooner or later these pony video’s would get him kicked out of the house.
As he snapped out of the thought he clicked the next Kyrospawn video.
“Confound these ponies.”
* * *
It had been 5 hours now since mike’s parents left, but he was still watching clips and episodes of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.
“Okay, last video and then I’m going to do something useful” Mike promised himself, but to no avail.
Many more hours later of mindlessly watching various of these videos a sudden noise erupts from upstairs, like something just fell and knocked over a pile of papers. Mike jumped up.
“It could’ve been the dog, but she’s in the scullery, safely locked in her kennel.” He thought, not trying to fret over nothing.
Another sound.
"Okay, now this is getting weird.”
It’s late at night and his parents wouldn’t be back until 02.00 AM, so he has his doubts on checking out what might’ve caused the sounds.
Mike finally decides to investigate. Cautiously he walks upstairs, through the hallway and to his room, all the lights in the house are off, except for a flickering light in his room. He doesn’t remember turning that light on, the newly spawned mess didn’t make much sense either.
“What the-”
Before he could finish his sentence he gets pounced on from behind, his head hits the wooden floor and the last thing he sees before he passes out is a pink lock of curly hair dangling before his eyes. “Oops, sorry..” he faintly hears as he loses consciousness.
Mike stirs awake about an hour later, lying on his bed.
He turns his head to the side and looks at his alarm clock; 02.07
Before even trying to process how he got knocked out and woke up on his bed, a sudden realization struck him.
“Crap! My parents must be home and I haven’t had the chance to cleanse my browser history of ponies!”
He immediately jumped up and ran down the stairs as if his life depended on it.
Not his best move; he missed a step which caused him to tumble down the remaining five.
Flat out on the ground, still dizzy from his fall Mike turned his head to the left to look through the window, giving a clear view of the driveway. He noticed something; there was no car there so his parents couldn’t be home yet. He slowly took notice of the sounds of drawers opening and closing, accompanied with the cheerful humming of a song he recognized, but couldn’t quite name.
Slowly crawling up, still sore from the fall, Mike steadily walked up to the kitchen; the door was open and the light was on.
He stopped right there.
“What if it’s a burglar, or some psychopathic murderer?” He thought.
How unlikely the latter might be, he didn’t want to risk anything by walking in there, defenceless.
Mike turned around to walk over to the coat rack, he didn’t have many options for defence so a clothes-hanger would have to do.
As he grabbed the clothes-hanger he turned around to walk to the kitchen, slightly trembling on his legs.
His head hurt, and the adrenaline that was now pumping through his body wasn’t doing much good, either.
As he closed in on the door opening of the kitchen he slowed his pace.
He peeked around the corner.
Mike’s jaw dropped.
He now stood in the door opening.
A pink pony, covered in flour stains, he knew all too well was there in the kitchen, mixing something in a bowl.
Before he thought about it too much he cleared his throat to try and say something, this caused the pony to look up.
“Hello?” Mike said with a voice full of doubt; for all he knew this could’ve been an illusion from when he got knocked unconscious.
As soon as Mike’s words left his lips the pink pony spit out the spoon she was holding in her muzzle.
“Hey, my name is Pinkie Pie! I see that you’re finally awake, sorry about the falling incident!” The pink pony exclaimed with a cheerful tone.
Mike freaked out a little at this and backed up a step; “how is this possible, am I really hallucinating, or just dreaming?”
After a few seconds of doubt and confusion he finally decides to answer.
“Uhm, my name is Mike.” He responded sheepishly.
“Hi there Mike! Why are you holding a coat hanger?” Pinkie Pie asked fascinated whilst bearing a smile on her face.
“Well..” Mike began, stumbling over his words. “I thought… a burglar.. might’ve, uhm.”
Pinkie responded with laughter. “Did you think that I was a burglar? Why would I make you cupcakes if I was a burglar, silly?”
Pinkie Pie continued to giggle a little.
“Besides, I don’t think a coat hanger would do much to fend off an intruder.”
Mike felt embarrassed; She had a good point there.
He snapped back to reality.
“Wait, how did you even get here?”
Pinkie Pie looked at Mike with a thinking face.
“Well, I was at the Sugarcube Corner helping Mrs Cake with a new batch of cupcakes when suddenly I heard a huge BANG outside!” Pinkie waved her forelegs around to emphasise on how loud it was. “I galloped outside and looked around, then suddenly I was blinded by a BRIGHT flash of white light! When I could see again I fell, and then I landed on your floor, sorry for the mess by the way!”
Pinkie finished talking, Still having a grin and bright eyes printed upon her face.
Mike just stood there, still not fully grasping the fact that his favourite cartoon pony was there, in his kitchen.
“So, wait.. Let me get this straight; You heard a loud noise, went outside, were blinded by a huge flash and ended up in my house?”
He finally managed to respond.
“Hmh!” Pinkie responded while nodding, still bearing a grin.
The sound of a car driving up to Mike’s house filled the short silence.
Perhaps it was because Mike was tired, but he finally remembered why he ran downstairs in such a hurry.
He panicked. “Ponies!”.
Mike could easily just delete his browser history, that was the least of his problems, but now a pink pony from the very show he wanted to cleanse the laptop of was here!
Pinkie noticed the look of panic on Mike’s face.
“What’s wrong? You don’t like cupcakes?” Pinkie asked, her face showing a somewhat disappointed expression.
Sweat broke out on Mike’s forehead.
“Can you hide somewhere? Some place you’re hard to spot?” Mike said nervously, still thinking of ideas on how to handle the whole situation.
“Why?” Pinkie asked. A sudden smile appeared on her face again. “Oh, is this a game? Like hide and go seek?”
“Yes!” Mike responded immediately. “We’re playing hide and go seek!”
“Okie Dokie Lokey!” Pinkie responded cheerfully. “I gotta warn you though; I’m REALLY good at this game!”
Mike disregarded what she said and ran to the living room where the laptop stood, he heard Pinkie walk, off to find a hiding spot.
He finally arrived at the laptop and quickly sat down, adrenaline again rushing through his veins.
“Good.” He thought. “The laptop didn’t go on standby.”
After a few clicks his task was accomplished, and not a minute too late; He heard the rattling of keys, followed by sound of the front door opening.
"Hello, we're back."
"Are you still awake, Mike?" A female voice asked.
Mike jolted up.
That was his mom's voice.
"Yes?" Mike responded in his most casual voice.
He heard another set of footsteps. slightly louder than his mom's.
A low voice called from outside.
"Have you left the house intact while we were gone?" “Dad.” Mike thought to himself.
Noises came from upstairs.
Mike knew what this meant. Pinkie Pie.
"Uhm, i'm feeling really tired now, i think i'm just gonna go sleep now." Mike said.
Mike stepped out of the living room.
"Okay hun, goodnight."
His mother responded whilst making her way to the kitchen.
As Mike walked up the stairs he heard his mother call from the kitchen.
"Mike, shouldn't you clean this mess first, of whatever you were trying to make?"
"Crap." Mike thought. "I gotta think of an excuse now."
"Yeah.. Uhm.. Can i perhaps clean it tomorrow, i'm like really tired."
Mike said, trying his best to sound sincere.
"I'll clean it up now." His mother responded with a tired voice. "But the next 5 days it's your turn to do the dishes."
"Okay, thanks!" Mike yelled out. he continued his way upstairs."
He arrived on the second floor. “Now to find Pinkie.” Mike thought, sighing.
Chapter 2
“Think” Mike said to himself, pinching the bridge of his nose. “If I were a Hyperactive Pink pony, where would I hide?”
He reminded himself of the fact that this was Pinkie Pie and that relating to her thought stream is considered impossible.
Luckily there were only 3 rooms upstairs, Along with a bathroom and the attic.
As Mike thought about where to look first he noticed a rather thick and long cotton-candy colored hair.
“Of course, it HAS to be the attic, just great.”
Mike thought as he laid his face in the palm of his hand.
Mike wasn’t really one to be easily scared, but the attic just always made his stomach churn, whenever he was near there.
Even at 18 years of age, that attic gave an unnerving feeling to him.
Mike sighed.
“Well, here we go..”
As he opened the door leading up to the attic he noticed that his suspicions were right; The lights were on.
A rush of adrenaline made him take his first step onto the staircase leading up to the attic.
A second step.
A third.
He made it to the attic. Even with the lights on it was still tough to see anything, really.
The mess scattered all over the floor did not help either.
Taking near blind steps he moved his way across the area.
“Goddamn it!” Mike yelled, quickly placing a hand before his mouth; he stepped on a nail protruding from a loose piece of floorboard. it went right through the sole of his shoe.
A high pitched shriek rang across the attic.
Mike listened carefully.
“Now where did that come from?”
He disregarded the pain in his foot and tried to focus on the direction the sound came from.
After a few steps in seemingly the right direction he came to the light source in the attic; a large ceiling lamp.
Mike looked up to it and couldn’t help but smirk a little; The tip of a pink colored tail shows hanging from just under the lampshade.
“How in the Hell is that even remotely possible?”
Mike wondered.
Completely disregarding the improbable sight before his eyes, he decided that it was time to get Pinkie somewhere he can keep an eye on her, making sure she doesn’t do anything dangerous.
“Considering she’s now hanging from underneath a lampshade, I failed pretty badly.”
Mike shrugged it off and began pulling the pink tail, signalling Pinkie that he found her.
Pinkie’s head immediately popped up from the upper end of the lampshade which caused her head to bump into the ceiling.
“Ouch! Oh hey Mike! ‘Took you a while to find me, I told you I was good at this game! So, I guess you should hide now?”
Pinkie Pie chirped, rubbing her head where it hit the ceiling with her hoof.
"Okay listen." Mike sighed, thinking over what he was about to say. "This must sound really weird to you, or scary, but you are a cartoon character."
Pinkie looked at mike with a puzzled look.
Mike pinched the bridge of his nose.
"You are from a cartoon show, about ponies. It shouldn't even be possible for you to be here, but somehow it happened."
Pinkie started to frown, and her hair lost a bit of volume.
Mike took notice of this.
"And, I’m not saying that I don't want you here, but it's just that my parents aren't too fond of 'bronies' ever since they saw a special about them on Fox."
The pink pony just looked confused, not sure what to make of this.
Mike realized that all these words probably wouldn't make much sense.
"Bronies are older people that watch this cartoon show, about those ponies."
Mike continued.
Pinkie still looked confused.
"I could explain this a lot easier if I had my laptop." Mike mumbled, he jumped up. "Can you wait here while I get something?"
Mike carefully walked down the stairway of the attic.
He was back on the second floor. Mike peeked downstairs.
Both his parents where in the kitchen.
"Okay, now to CAREFULLY walk down these stairs."
After a time that took longer that he imagined it would take him to walk down, he finally set foot to the ground.
Mike slowly turned to face the living room.
He heard his parents mumbling and cleaning up the mess that Pinkie made.
He tiptoed over to his destination as steadily as he could.
There, he made it.
Mike quickly snatched the laptop away, along with the battery and cable.
Then, he sprinted away to the staircase.
He took a moment to listen.
Silence.
Mike focused his attention on the stairs.
After a couple of huge steps, skipping a few in between those, he finally made it upstairs again.
As he was about to walk towards the attic until he heard the rustling of papers, coming from his room.
Mike walked into his room, thinking nothing of it at first, just Pinkie looking through some comic books, but the reality was quite disturbing.
Pinkie Pie was sitting in the middle of his room, browsing through a magazine.
"Hey mike.. What's 'Playboy'?"
She asked, Staring at the pages of the explicit content bearing magazine, still browsing through them.
Mike quickly grabbed the magazine away from Pinkie.
"That's not for ponies."
"Oh, that's fine, there is plenty more under your closet!" Pinkie chirped as she grabbed another playboy magazine with her teeth.
Mike stood there, embarrassed and shocked. He completely forgot about his secret Playboy stash.
Mike snatched the playboy away from Pinkie's mouth.
"Hey! I was just going to read that!" Pinkie responded with a slightly annoyed voice.
Mike quickly ran over to the small gap where the playboy stash was kept.
Mike sighed.
"These magazines are bad."
Pinkie gave Mike a puzzled look.
"They're not so bad! The only things in there were bunch of beings that kind of looked like you, but with a longer mane. Oh, and they had funny looking orbs on their chests, they kind of looked like udders!" Pinkie exclaimed.
Out of nowhere she grabbed another Playboy magazine.
She opened it up again and innocently began browsing through the pornographic pictures once more.
Mike had his attention focused on the small gap under the closet, and putting back the two magazines that Pinkie managed to grab.
“Ooh, I didn’t know legs could bend THAT far!”
Pinkie said out loud, impressed by the lean woman in picture.
Mike gave a quick look at the pink pony browsing through yet another Playboy.
“What did I tell you?” He took away the magazine.
At lack for better words Mike just continued.
“They’re just not suitable for ponies, don’t even ask.”
Mike took the Playboy and put them back with the rest under his closet.
“Okie Dokie Loki!” Pinkie Pie responded cheerfully.
“So why did you get your lap thingy?”
“Oh, right.”
Mike said, he wandered off there for a second. A pink pony finding your porn magazine collection tends to do that.
He sat down and placed the laptop on the ground.
Pinkie stared at the laptop, fascinated as Mike flipped up the screen.
“Hold on a moment.” He said as he went to YouTube to find a My Little Pony episode.
“There, this was what I was talking about.” Mike pointed at the screen.
Pinkie sat down next to Mike, still staring at the screen with great fascination.
“ Hmm... Twitchy twitcha twitcha twitch.”
“Pinkie Pie? What in the wide-wide-world of Equestria are you up to?”
“Oh! It's my tail! It's my tail! It's a-twitch a-twitchin'! And you know what that means!”
“I knew it!” Pinkie nearly screamed out, pointing her hoof at the screen.
This startled mike and caused him to nearly have a heart-attack, at least it felt like that to him.
“W-what? What do you mean?”
Mike asked in confusion.
“They wouldn’t believe me, but I just knew it!”
Pinkie Pie again yelled out.
“Ever since Twilight arrived in Ponyville I felt like there was something following me, and my friends. Every week, one or two days, I felt like there where others watching us! And now I know why! You were watching us on this thing!”
Pinkie waved her forelegs around the laptop.
“Hmm.. I never knew that cartoon shows might work like that.”
Mike pondered the idea.
Pinkie prodded Mike with her muzzle.
He looked at her.
“So , are we like, famous?” Pinkie asked with a suppressed smile.
Mike over thought the her question.
“I guess you could call it that, You are famous, more or less.”
“Awesome!” Pinkie chirped. “Do you have have any more of these.. These, uhm..-“
“-Videos? Yup, there are at least 30 more episodes.”
Mike responded.
“Can we watch some more?”
Pinkie asked with near puppy-dog eyes.
“I guess that’s fi-“
Mike stopped mid-sentence; He heard his parents walk up the stairs.
“Pinkie Pie? Remember when I told you about my parents, and how they don’t really like bronies?
Well, if they see you, I might get kicked out of the house, so can you hide just one more time?”
“Oh, don’t be silly, parents would NEVER do such a thing!”
Pinkie responded, giggling.
“This world is very different from Equestria, you have no idea what people are capable of doing. Please just hide, until I tell you it’s safe again.”
Mike responded, panic affecting his voice, giving the pink pony a serious look.
“Okay, if you say so.”
Pinkie responded with a sarcastic voice as she stepped in the closet, which mike held open.
He quickly deleted the history and turned off his browser.
Mike’s father walked into Mike’s room.
“Hey, were you talking to someone? I swear I heard a girls voice here.”
His dad implied.
“Huh, oh no. I was watching uhm, a video.”
Mike managed to stutter out.
“Your mother told me you were tired, so why are you watching videos?”
His dad asked, slightly agitated.
“Oh, I was just about to sleep.”
Mike haphazardly spat out.
As his father walked out the door he turned off the lights.
“Well, goodnight.”
“ ’Night.”
Mike said, peeking around the corner of the door opening.
His dad disappeared from his sight.
“Okay, coast is clear, you can come out now.”
Mike whispered to the closet just as he was about to turn the lights back on.
“Okay!”
Pinkie Pie crawled up from under the bed.
Mike looked confused.
“Wait, you were hiding in my closet, how did you?”
“This is Pinkie I'm talking about, she’ll continue to defy physics, no matter if she’s in a different universe or not.” He realized.
Pinkie looked at Mike with a grin on her face.
“Never mind.”
