Corona Panic

by Devela

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Random, Pinkie Pie, Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe
Length: 1329

Equestria has Corona and Pinkie found out.

The virus has appeared in Equestria, and Pinkie ensues.

Published 2020-03-15 10:40:02 UTC
Last updated 2020-03-15 10:40:02 UTC

The Only Chapter

The sun rose like any other day over the horizon, cresting Saddle Lake before starting it's way up towards the sky itself. It looked forward to every new dawn and wondered what new things the ponies would discover or do today. It spied Ponyville in the distance, the crystal tree sparkling dazzling in it's rays of golden warmth. The fort of toilet paper with hoof sanitizer filled cauldrons on the battlements was new... Although it noticed the pink one who loved to stare at it and make it feel uncomfortable, I mean truly a sun doesn't even wear clothes and the pink one made it feel nude sometimes with how long it stared.

Oh here comes the purple one with her small dragon to take care of things. The sun was filled with relief that it wouldn't have to stare at the monstrosity of a building much longer.

Twilght groaned softly as she rubbed a hoof across her face, looking up towards the 'battlements' made out of several different packages of toilet paper and a few boxes of tissue for more stable support. The morning had been so simple yet, she planned on researching this new disease Ponyville general asked her to look into. Spike was lovable, but right now she hated him as he had dragged her outside and showed her the stupid fort. She'd whined and begged to be let go, research was her passion and this was not something she wanted to deal with. So after a long drawn out sigh, and several hard jabs to her ribs she called up towards the fort. "PINKIE! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"

There was a moment of quiet pause before a gasp as loud as thunder was heard above the purple duo. Pinkie's head suddenly appearing over the edge of the battlements, a full body hazmat suit on. "Mmmmpph mphh mpph." She eagerly responded, not having turned on the voice box to allow herself to be heard.

A groan escaped Twilight as she looked towards Spike. "Can't we just let the guards deal with her?"

Spike shook his head as he pointed back towards Ponyville proper. "Sorry Twi, they already tried to get her to demolish it. They ended up being doused with those cauldrons, and the fliers got expertly shot by her sanitizer hose."

There were exactly three owlish blinks before Twilight sank down to her flanks. "What?"

"Yeah, she also somehow has the full capability to make more sanitizer in there. She'd already bought all of the sanitizer in Ponyville."

"Fiiiine." Twilight whined before spreading her wings wide, slowly flapping up towards the battlements. Her horn already activating as a small shield bubble formed around herself.

Pinkie saw this all happened and seemed to gasp as she hopped up before rushing away from sight. Twilight just rolled her eyes before looking down at Spike. "This will be solved in no time at all Spike."

What Twilight didn't notice was the glint of steel in the morning light from the end of a fire hose. Pinkie stood on her hind hooves as she looked down with a pinkie camo helmet atop her hazmat suit. Her voice calling out. "Mmmph!" Suddenly twisting the lever as a jet of high pressure sanitizer blasted out against the shield. Twilight was surprised by this that her magic faulted for just a brief moment. This was enough though to send her crashing down into the ground and sliding along towards Ponyville itself.

Twilight stood up after the blast ended, soaked from horn to hoof in hoof sanitizer as she blinked before wiping it away as she looked towards Spike who was standing a short distance away. "Soooo why did she make the fort?"

"Well yesterday when she heard about this new virus going around, she also heard that some cities are closing down their factories. So goods like hoof sanitizer and toilet paper won't be delivered as much. Apparently someone mixed up the numbers of how many ponies were infected and how many have passed on. I mean it's not common among anyone your age, but I think older ponies like Granny suffer a lot worse. So Pinkie though that to prevent it you needed a lot of toilet paper stocked up, and everyone to be sanitary. Soooo she thought you'd need to bath in sanitizer to be sanitary..."

Twilight blinked before facehoofing, groaning as she felt the sanitizer slash over her fur and mane before she shook her head. Her horn immediately lighting up as she teleported out of the slimy substance. Then suddenly atop the walls as she looked around for Pinkie. "Pinkie! Get out here!"

"Mmm?" Pinkie responded from behind Twilight, making the purple fur stand on edge before turning around swiftly to come face to face with the hose again. Her horn igniting to form a small blockage in the hose right behind the lever.

"Pinkie, I need you to understand something." Twilight said, the only response being a head tilt. "Ponies don't normally die from a virus like this, the only ones who are those with weak immune systems, mostly the elderly. I was asked to research samples to help develop a spell or vaccine for this. Now, I'm going to turn on your voice function. Calmly, and I do mean calmly, explain why you did all of this." Her magic activated as she turned on Pinkie's voice box.

Pinkie blinked for a moment, setting the hose down as she didn't realize that she'd twisted the valve and pressure was building in the hose. "WellyouseeIheardaboutthisnastyvirusandhowiteffected..mmmppppphhhhh." Her voice cut out mid sentence as Twilight shut off the box and just groaned. Twilight looked towards the sky.

"Pinkie I said calmly, not as fast as you could. Now I'll turn it back on. Just explain slowly now. Understand?" She looked back down towards the other mare who nodded eagerly.

Twilight used her magic to press the button again. Pinkie smiling as she could be understood finally. "Well I heard about this nasty wasty virus that was making everypony feel downy wony. So I learned about it from Dashie to see what it was all about, cause apparently Cloudsdale was hit really hard with it and the weather factory was shut down. That's when I learned about the other factories being shut down and it was being spread by being dirty and not using hoof sanatizer. So I made this fort out of the products that shut down, so we always know where it all is so we can ration it correctly. Though the guards said I couldn't do that and they tried to touch me to stop be, and well they don't always wash their armor sometimes after training and sweating so I had to clean it for them. Then you showed up and I saw sweat on you and just had to make sure you were okay." The smile on Pinkie's face was as wide as her face as she beamed at her plan.

Twilight just groaned as she looked at Pinkie for a moment before shaking her head. Though the groan from the production machine was ominous as the pair looked towards the hose which had grown to the size of an airship without them both noticing.... It ominously loomed over all of Ponyville and parts of Equestria...

Twilight looked at Pinkie with wide eyes before casting a small teleport. She suddenly arrived at a small alcove on the moon, looking towards Equss as the moon was just barely about to end it's night and go to the other side. It was rather happy to be on it's way out as the balloon of hoof sanitizer finally burst... Equestria was cured of the virus but at the cost of everypony being drenched up to their withers in hoof sanitzier.

Author's Note

This is because of too many memes being seen and little sleep. I am not sorry for this at all.