Oponi

Waka-zashi

"Lovely mares and gentlecolts, welcome to the overdome!!" Vinyl had read her part with extreme enthusiasm. "At the east entrance, weighing-in at two-hundred-seventy pounds... SHIIIIINING ARMOOOOOOR!"

"I never gave her my weight. That isn't even right." Shining Armor said forlornly to the only person who would still both to hear him complain.

"Really, dear. I'm sure it was just planned as a little joke to get the crowd going." Cadance nuzzled him, she was still technically angry at him instigating this entire event, but she was the only person who would listen to his whining. "You know everyone in Canterlot owes you their lives, I doubt a few jokes will change their minds."

He returned her nuzzle, he had been under a lot of stress lately, and this certainly wasn't helping. He put on his helmet before marching into the stadium, met with cheers from the crowd.

"At the west entrance, standing a righteous six-foot-three, shoes included... WAAAAKAAAAA!"

He walked out of the other entrance, hand to his face as if embarrassed. After a few seconds, he scrapped the ruse and held both hands above his head, basking in the cheers that he wasn't receiving, not that he cared, his entrance could have been met with a dragon barfing on his head and he would still keep his confidence at a constant high. He hadn't even changed out of his usual pom-pom kimono, his only 'armor' was his helmet.

Shining didn't like being made a fool of. "You don't even respect me enough to bring armor? We aren't going to be using training weapons you know."

Waka looked-over his opponent. "That armour is certainly high-quality. I bet it has seen quite some use. As for my situation, my people are a more dexterious type. We certainly can wear armor like yours, but I find it just a bit too slow and uncomfortable. In short, it's not my thing, baby."

"Challengers! Choose your weapons! You may pick any items you desire!"

Shining Armor won the coin-toss and was given first pick. He decided to settle on a long spear that had a lighter center made of light alloy. It certainly wasn't of any use for pure melee combat, but in the hands of a talented unicorn's telekinesis, the reduced weight made it deadly.

Waka simply raised his sword, signaling that it was his own choice. Shining couldn't help but be a little skepticle. "I thought about why you would make a blade in that style, it's meant for finishing a fight quickly, correct?"

"Oui oui oui, mon amie." He drew the sword and set the sheath on the table full of weapons. "Where I've been, fights are meant to last for seconds, this blade in particular," He raised it to the sky, the light reflecting off it's surface. "It's called a wakizashi, meant for fighting indoors mostly."

"So you brought it here? I don't know how much confidence you have in yourself, but there is a limit to ego, that sword isn't even meant for armor by the looks of it."

"All things in due time, we can't keep the paying-ponies waiting, oui?"

"You charged them?"

"Go!"

Amaterasu wagged-happily as she was scratched by Celestia. This is why she preferred to meet with female rulers, they were always the most talented with their affection. After realizing that conversation was useless, Celestia had just decided to lazily pet her guest, her fur felt softer than velvet. Amaterasu didn't really care about the fight, unless Waka lost, of course, then she would hang it over his head forever. The day had started cloudy but was clearing-up at the same rate that she was getting scratched. Had she been paying attention, she would have felt a faint tinge of malice in the air.

Waka didn't move from his spot, staying still while watching Shining Armor. "Before we really start, I was wondering if you would answer something for me."

Shining kept his spear pointed toward Waka, keeping him fully in view before answering. "I don't care if you have any more jokes to make, I just don't care anymore."

"No jokes right now. I was wondering, have things been... difficult recently? When we met I thought you were a usual pompous commander but it seems more like a downtrodden vibe coming from you."

Well he certainly wasn't expecting anything of that kind to come from him. "In all honesty, things have been erratic at best here. The changeling invasion was only two weeks ago, and to be honest, it hasn't made me feel very useful since. I mean, they snuck an army into Canterlot while their leader was right in front of me and I couldn't even see past her lame ruse."

"Celestia told me the story, but from her side, it sounds like you and your wife were the ones who managed to expell the entire army at the end. While it could have happened at a better time, you did something that even your ruler couldn't do, and isn't that the task of any good soldier?"

"That's true, but the elements of harmony probably could have been used with a similar result."

Waka just sighed, this stallion was in a firm stage of what could be called 'one-time loser' syndrome. "So, what you are basically saying is, when Celestia... umm... hoof picked you for your position, that there was someone better? Some who could, how can I say it, get the job done?"

"Well technically, no there wasn't, I got the best score on the officer test."

"So we have narrowed-down that you are firstly, the most qualified, secondly, the most experienced, and thirdly, were capable of expelling an entire army in a matter of seconds, oui?"

Shining got a bit of his confidence back. "I guess so."

"No! You know so!" Waka skimmed-over his conversation with the princess, trying to find something fitting enough for his closing. He remembered one pony the princess wasn't able to say more than a single good thing about. "Maybe we should just make Blueblood the captain! He has confidence!"

"Blueblood would sell Equestria down-the-river before he got his captain's stripes!" Shouted Shining Armor. "I am the most talented battlemage in the Equestrian military, I am the one, along with my wife, who defeated Chrysalis, and I am the one who is going to kick the ass of a fruity, half-baked prophet before I go home today!"

"Magnifique captain!" Waka didn't get to say more before he had to dodge a spear whizzing past his head, sticking firmly in the ground before being removed with Shining's magic.

"Quite the héros, aren't you captain?" Waka continued to avoid the spear, trying to get closer to Shining Armor but facing the difficulties of being blocked by a spear that could turn any way it wanted. He couldn't parry, katanas just weren't made for that kind of constant abuse.

"Having trouble? I could always make it go slower, if it's too difficult."

"Let me try something first." Waka reached into his sleeve and drew a dagger, quickly tossing it at Shining Armor. Shining Armor, not expecting the extra weapon, was met with a painful thud as the blade whacked against his armor, thankfully not piercing it.

In the brief moment of reduced concentration, Waka ran towards Shining Armor but was whacked in the back of his knees by the spear handle, once-more in control. The spear quickly brought it's pommel down, whacking Waka in the back. It didn't hurt much, considering how light the weapon was, but served as a good means of sneaking-in some extra damage. He rose again and tried reaching for the spear, grabbing it in his right hand. He slashed with his left, embedding the blade in the hilt of the spear, pushing it to the ground. They were now at a stand-still, Waka using his hands to keep the spear down and Shining, without a weapon but also far-enough away to make a charge from Waka useless.

Waka brought his right-foot up and shoved it downward, embedding the long tooth in the ground, forming a triangle over the spear-head. He removed his right-hand quickly and began searching inside his kimono again, wobbling slightly as Shining continued to jerk his spear back towards him and pulling on his foot. Eventually, he found what he was looking for. "Aha!" He exclaimed as he drew his weapon from his pockets.

It was his rosewood flute.

"A flute? Whew, for a second I thought you had another knife." Laughed Shining Armor.

"I do, but I think I will in-fact get, as you said, my ass kicked if I don't use it. Haven't you noticed something odd during our fight? I'll give you a hint, it involves my hands."

"Please, spare me. I know you've been going left-handed all fight, I just didn't call you out because it made it even easier."

"Oh-hoh, it seems I greatly misjudged you, I'll have to try harder to surprise you I guess. How's this?" He spun his flute in his hand before pressing his palm to the top, collapsing it. As he drew his hand back, a bright green-white blade composed of light extended from the tip, forming a second sword. "Congratulation! You get to be one of the lucky few that get's to experience my Pillow Talk!"

"... Excuse you?"

"Pillow Talk, my sword's name is Pillow Talk... although if you want..."

"Dear god no, let's just keep going."

"Oui." He drew his foot back up, allowing Shining to retrieve his spear before rushing at him with a sword in each hand. Shining continued swinging, his blows now parried by Waka's beam sabre. He wouldn't be out-done by some lame deus-ex-machina like that, so he decided to go for a more risky tactic.

Waka continued to charge at Shining armor. He slowed when he saw a slight twinkle in the captain's armor, along with his face which wore a look of victory. Quickly, he dived to the side, narrowly avoiding the dagger he had thrown earlier from being plunged into his back. "You'll have to try harder if you really want to get your point-across!"

"Ugggghhhhh." Sighed the audience.

"I assure you, there will be more before we are done here!"